Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #115

00:00:53.000 That's officially my favorite Nikki Minaj song.

00:00:55.000 That's a remix of an Andy hit called Dominoes where she added some rap on top of it.

00:01:02.000 Welcome back to Get Off My Lawn.

00:01:04.000 Welcome, Maddie Odell.

00:01:07.000 Taking care of business every day.

00:01:14.000 There was a weird offshoot of the Proud Boys who were trying to make it racist, and I think they called themselves TCB.

00:01:20.000 Really?

00:01:20.000 They tried to, you know.

00:01:22.000 It was originally an Elvis.

00:01:24.000 Telvis, yeah.

00:01:26.000 We have Ryan Katsu Rivera on the mix today.

00:01:31.000 What up, Ryan Guy?

00:01:32.000 Yo, yo, yo.

00:01:35.000 If the calls suck today, I'm going to murder your wife and cut open her pregnant belly.

00:01:43.000 Oh, my lord.

00:01:44.000 I'm going to pull out her child.

00:01:47.000 Mine child.

00:01:48.000 Our.

00:01:49.000 What did I say, mine?

00:01:52.000 Did I say my child?

00:01:53.000 Was that a Freudian slip?

00:01:54.000 Oops.

00:01:56.000 Better not a Freudian slip.

00:01:57.000 She doesn't have a beard.

00:01:58.000 And then I'm going to raise it.

00:02:00.000 Wow.

00:02:01.000 And then I'm going to kill it.

00:02:03.000 Oh.

00:02:03.000 So it's going to be elaborate.

00:02:05.000 If you fuck up to that.

00:02:09.000 So it's torture and...

00:02:10.000 So you know how it goes on Thursday nights, folks?

00:02:12.000 We do free podcasts from 12 to, I'm sorry, from 9 to like 9.30, and then we go behind the paywall.

00:02:21.000 Of course, you have to pay the bills for the first part, and then we get really fun and exciting behind the paywall.

00:02:27.000 I can't believe you haven't paid for Censored.tv yet.

00:02:30.000 10 bucks a month, a beer and a half a month.

00:02:34.000 And it's endless, endless content.

00:02:37.000 You cannot possibly finish it all.

00:02:39.000 When we started this, it was just me doing an hour and a half show, four days a week.

00:02:45.000 Now, I do five days a week, two hours a day, and there's limitless shows, endless shows.

00:02:53.000 Jacob Wall, Laura Loomer, Cornell Wes, Candace Owens, Roger Stone, Zuby.

00:03:02.000 It's basically Wakanda.

00:03:03.000 There's so many blacks.

00:03:07.000 But this particular episode is brought to you by Drome, the conservative dating app.

00:03:11.000 Drome is the place to meet conservative girls.

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00:03:14.000 What?

00:03:16.000 Oh, sorry.

00:03:17.000 There are superficial face wiping apps, and then there are the quote-unquote expert matching apps.

00:03:24.000 Both usually waste your time.

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00:03:29.000 If you're right-wing, things probably aren't going to work out with someone who's a total lefty.

00:03:34.000 Same with religion, lifestyle, how to raise children, and other core conservative values.

00:03:40.000 Sure, the right person might change to meet you where you are in life, but why not just find the perfect match from the start?

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00:03:50.000 You pick deal breakers and deal makers.

00:03:52.000 There are no experts and match percentages, and you don't have to addictively check the app.

00:03:56.000 As soon as someone matches your deal breakers and deal makers, and you match theirs, you get a notification.

00:04:02.000 If you don't find a deal breaker or deal maker that's important to you, you can add your own anonymously.

00:04:07.000 Drome is also video-only for more human interactions.

00:04:11.000 Go to drome.date slash gavin in your phone's browser.

00:04:14.000 Click the iOS or Google button to install and use the invite code Gavin to sign up.

00:04:19.000 If you're already matched up, tell your friends and get your boyfriend or girlfriend to tell their friends.

00:04:24.000 That's d-r-om-dote slash gavin drome.

00:04:31.000 Design and meet your perfect match.

00:04:33.000 It's free to use.

00:04:34.000 That's dromedate slash Gavin.

00:04:40.000 You know, I was thinking about this dude.

00:04:43.000 His name is John Berger.

00:04:45.000 J-O-N-B-I-R-G-E-R.

00:04:50.000 And he's an expert.

00:04:52.000 He's an old fucking left-wing Jew bag who is obsessed with young people's sex lives.

00:05:00.000 And there he is.

00:05:03.000 Ugly dude.

00:05:04.000 He Zeke hils me.

00:05:05.000 He lives in my neighborhood.

00:05:06.000 Whenever he sees me, he's Zeke hils me.

00:05:08.000 But it's always when I'm with my youngest boy and I can't run and kick his ass.

00:05:13.000 And this guy, his area of expertise is young people's sex lives.

00:05:18.000 He's written many books, I think two actually, about how young people fuck and how they date and what their dating lives are.

00:05:26.000 And this guy, I had a tech place fix my computer, and he found out that they did it for me.

00:05:35.000 So his contention is these people are Nazis, right?

00:05:39.000 Because they fix Nazis' computers.

00:05:41.000 So if you send your computer there, you're giving them all your data.

00:05:45.000 You're giving Nazis your data.

00:05:48.000 Oh.

00:05:49.000 And they'll like get into your bank account and fuck you over.

00:05:52.000 So he shut down the place.

00:05:54.000 It was run by an immigrant, and he shut down the tech place.

00:05:57.000 Jesus Christ.

00:05:59.000 What?

00:05:59.000 What's wrong with him?

00:06:00.000 Fucking...

00:06:01.000 So, first of all, he writes about kiddie sex.

00:06:03.000 So that's what's fucking wrong with him.

00:06:05.000 Yeah.

00:06:06.000 Dating.

00:06:07.000 How to date?

00:06:08.000 What young people, like being into dating, I'm sure dating is a complex thing for 19, 20 year olds.

00:06:15.000 But I'm not writing two books about it.

00:06:20.000 No.

00:06:20.000 The penises of seven-year-olds.

00:06:22.000 Who knows what they're up to?

00:06:24.000 Research it.

00:06:25.000 The woman in Texas about the book the other day.

00:06:30.000 What was that?

00:06:31.000 The woman in Texas?

00:06:32.000 Yeah, she was at the school meeting about the...

00:06:35.000 Oh, my God.

00:06:36.000 yeah, yeah.

00:06:36.000 The kid was 10, and the other kid was sucking his dick, and oh, Jesus Christ.

00:06:41.000 The way the left is spinning that, though, is that was just a book available at the library.

00:06:45.000 Yeah, bullshit.

00:06:45.000 And that's not true.

00:06:46.000 That's just a lie.

00:06:47.000 He's not written out his reading.

00:06:48.000 It was an assignment.

00:06:50.000 It was write an erotic passage, a sexual passage that would be an erotic novel that you wouldn't want your mother to read.

00:06:58.000 Now rewrite it in a way that you want your mother to read it.

00:07:04.000 How sick is that?

00:07:05.000 It's just like some wasted Satanist coming up with dumb ideas.

00:07:10.000 My name is Craig Schubert.

00:07:11.000 I'm the mayor of this city.

00:07:14.000 It has come to my attention that your educators are distributing essentially what is child pornography in the classroom.

00:07:24.000 I've spoken to a judge this evening.

00:07:27.000 She's already confirmed that.

00:07:30.000 So I'm going to give you a simple choice.

00:07:33.000 You either choose to resign from this Board of Education or you will be charged.

00:07:38.000 USSA.

00:07:38.000 You choose me.

00:07:40.000 Yep.

00:07:42.000 Thank you.

00:07:43.000 That's when you take a train when you resign out.

00:07:46.000 That's badass.

00:07:47.000 I can't believe he did that.

00:07:48.000 But anyway, the reason...

00:07:49.000 Somebody did it.

00:07:50.000 What?

00:07:51.000 Thank God somebody's doing it.

00:07:52.000 I've never seen anything like that, by the way.

00:07:54.000 When was the last time you saw a mayor go, you know what?

00:07:58.000 You all resign or you're going to fucking jail.

00:08:01.000 Yeah.

00:08:01.000 You're making kids write adult erotica for.

00:08:06.000 It's a classroom assignment.

00:08:09.000 How demented is that?

00:08:10.000 How sick is that?

00:08:11.000 It's so fucked up.

00:08:12.000 Didn't you cause quite a stir at your son's high school?

00:08:15.000 Yes, yes.

00:08:16.000 We're in lockdown for three hours.

00:08:18.000 What happened there again?

00:08:19.000 They wrote a little article in the paper about it.

00:08:23.000 Well, I was texting, my son had left his phone at my house.

00:08:28.000 So he received a message from a guidance counselor or social work at school.

00:08:37.000 And it said, hey, Dylan, it's so-and-so.

00:08:39.000 I just want to know if we're still meeting today.

00:08:42.000 So I didn't know unbanozumi.

00:08:46.000 I texted back and said, my son left his phone at my house last night.

00:08:50.000 You know, he's at school.

00:08:51.000 He doesn't have it.

00:08:51.000 I'm sure he's going to.

00:08:52.000 He goes, no, no, Dylan's not at school.

00:08:54.000 He's suspended.

00:08:56.000 So I'm like, why are you texting my son asking him if you're still going to meet him?

00:09:01.000 Like, where are you supposed to meet him?

00:09:02.000 Oh, at the library.

00:09:04.000 Like, the public library.

00:09:04.000 I'm like, what?

00:09:06.000 Like, who are you?

00:09:07.000 What is your position at the fucking school?

00:09:08.000 So you're getting pedo vibes.

00:09:10.000 I'm like, yeah, I'm like, why are you meeting my son who's suspended, not in school, off school property?

00:09:17.000 What?

00:09:17.000 So then, you know, I started calling the Board of Education and the guy's name was Dr. Wool or something.

00:09:25.000 And I was like, you know, everyone there.

00:09:27.000 And then the Harrison police came to where I lived.

00:09:30.000 And they said, you know, don't go to the school.

00:09:32.000 And my nephew at the time was at the high school too.

00:09:35.000 And he was like, oh, Uncle Matt, you had the whole school on lockdown for three hours.

00:09:39.000 Nobody could leave or come in.

00:09:41.000 Well, didn't they put your picture up in your criminal record in the office?

00:09:45.000 Yeah, that was the public safety officer in the school.

00:09:49.000 Yeah, that was another time.

00:09:51.000 That was a different time.

00:09:52.000 Yeah, it was two incidents at this high school.

00:09:54.000 What was that time?

00:09:56.000 I had gotten released from federal prison, and the fusion centers and parole and local police departments get disseminations of information that I'm home, I'm in the community, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:10:11.000 And the youth officer had called my wife earlier in the week, and she called me and said, they called me up and asked me a bunch of weird questions.

00:10:18.000 And she basically reiterated the same thing that, you know, our son knows where I was, he knows who I am, you know, but his friends don't need to know, you know, would you please keep this a private matter?

00:10:28.000 I don't go to the school.

00:10:30.000 But my son comes to me one day.

00:10:33.000 He goes, oh, dad, he goes, youth officer had your picture on the wall in the school.

00:10:37.000 I'm like, what?

00:10:39.000 So then I got a little agitated, and I had to go see my federal parole officer.

00:10:44.000 And I had told him that, you know, I was going to go up there and see this officer.

00:10:47.000 And he advised me not to.

00:10:49.000 And I said, well, I got to do what I got to do.

00:10:51.000 So you got to do what you got to do.

00:10:53.000 And I told him, I said, I was going to fucking smash him.

00:10:56.000 And he goes, oh, you can't tell me that.

00:10:57.000 I said, well, then I'm going to blow the world up.

00:10:59.000 He goes, well, you can't say that either.

00:11:01.000 I said, well.

00:11:02.000 And did you?

00:11:04.000 No, they locked school down.

00:11:05.000 Oh, right, right, right.

00:11:06.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:11:07.000 Dude, I was at SkyZone today with the kids, my youngest boy and his friend.

00:11:12.000 And there was a dude in the bathroom.

00:11:14.000 He was like 14.

00:11:16.000 And he was like adjusting his hair.

00:11:19.000 And he goes, I got mad swag.

00:11:20.000 I got killer swag.

00:11:22.000 And he's talking to two little boys who are about six.

00:11:26.000 And I was going piss.

00:11:28.000 And I just thought, that's a weird thing to say to little boys.

00:11:33.000 And then these moms come in and they go, are you guys done?

00:11:37.000 What's taking you so long?

00:11:38.000 To the little boys who are like six or seven.

00:11:40.000 And they scoop them out of there.

00:11:42.000 And then I'm looking at the dude who was just talking about his swag, who was like fixing his hair in the mirror.

00:11:48.000 And then he goes and gets some pizza.

00:11:50.000 I don't think he's there with anyone.

00:11:52.000 I think he was a fucking young pedophile.

00:11:54.000 Maybe what?

00:11:56.000 Victims become predators.

00:11:59.000 Like, remember when you were 16, right?

00:12:02.000 Imagine telling seven-year-olds that you're looking good.

00:12:09.000 I'm not.

00:12:10.000 It's the farthest thing from your fucking mind.

00:12:12.000 Like, when I was 17, little people, kids didn't exist.

00:12:16.000 Yeah.

00:12:17.000 They were like beetles living life.

00:12:20.000 I didn't see them.

00:12:22.000 I might stand on one by accident.

00:12:25.000 Yeah.

00:12:26.000 You're on the hunt for the opposite sex.

00:12:30.000 That age.

00:12:30.000 Hormones are raging.

00:12:32.000 Nita fashions.

00:12:34.000 Nice.

00:12:35.000 I can't say enough about Nita Fashions.

00:12:38.000 The reason I look so good every fucking night on this show is because I'm wearing Nita Fashions.

00:12:44.000 This is one of the only nights I'm not wearing Nita Fashions.

00:12:47.000 And the reason I'm dressed like this is I just came back from my daughter's birthday dinner in Koreatown in the city, which was delicious.

00:12:57.000 $350, by the way.

00:13:02.000 You know, I don't want to interrupt the Nita Fashions commercial, but my wife got my daughter this micro corg for her birthday.

00:13:12.000 It's the most complicated piece of machinery in the world.

00:13:18.000 Like a keyboard?

00:13:19.000 It's beyond a nuclear power plant.

00:13:21.000 If you pull up an introduction to the microcord, you will not understand one fucking word of this thing.

00:13:31.000 And it's like, I was going through our finances this past month.

00:13:35.000 My wife is spending money like at levels that would make Flava Flav blush.

00:13:42.000 $2,500 a day is not unusual.

00:13:45.000 Just like pissing money.

00:13:48.000 Pissing money.

00:13:49.000 And they're coming, and they are coming at levels that you haven't even seen yet.

00:13:53.000 By the hundreds of thousands of people.

00:13:54.000 Now, if my daughter, like my daughter's been taking guitar lessons forever, she can't play guitar.

00:13:59.000 We had a piano in the house, no one played it.

00:14:01.000 We have a keyboard in the house, no one touched it.

00:14:03.000 So now she has this in the house.

00:14:06.000 And it's like, it's a $500 fucking instrument that is so beyond complicated.

00:14:12.000 Play what you're playing there.

00:14:14.000 And I know this guy, by the way, because I saw him on YouTube beginner videos today.

00:14:18.000 Incredibly rich, detailed soundscapes.

00:14:25.000 That's what I said to my wife.

00:14:27.000 She's like, well, maybe she can figure it out.

00:14:29.000 I go, honey, you could do a soundtrack for Star Wars on this fucking thing.

00:14:35.000 It's a fucking movie.

00:14:36.000 It's really, really advanced.

00:14:41.000 And I'm not sure our daughter is even musically inclined.

00:14:46.000 A lot of people that aren't really tactically musically inclined, but they have ideas, this is the perfect entry point for them.

00:14:53.000 So there's a lot of things that she's not going to be utilizing at all, but if she just focuses on the basics, you know, that's what I did before I knew how to do any of this stuff.

00:15:01.000 And I make some bomb-ass tracks.

00:15:03.000 No, all your songs suck.

00:15:04.000 They don't.

00:15:05.000 Yes, they do.

00:15:05.000 No, they don't.

00:15:06.000 Yes, they do.

00:15:07.000 No, they don't.

00:15:08.000 They absolutely do.

00:15:08.000 No, they absolutely do.

00:15:10.000 All your songs are the worst songs ever made.

00:15:12.000 That's not true.

00:15:13.000 Okay, play one.

00:15:14.000 Everyone's going to projectile vomit.

00:15:16.000 Okay.

00:15:17.000 We have a couple of different vibes here.

00:15:18.000 Here we go, folks.

00:15:20.000 This one's called Smoking on a Sunday.

00:15:23.000 No, there's no such song called Smoking on a Sunday.

00:15:27.000 That's the vibe it's going to be.

00:15:29.000 This one is made by all keyboard stuff.

00:15:33.000 Oh, that's going to be great.

00:15:48.000 What's the woman talking thing?

00:15:51.000 It's watch the tram car, please.

00:15:52.000 I made a vlog for Wildwood, so I just made the song because I was like, I don't want to keep repeating songs.

00:15:56.000 Listen to this slapper.

00:15:57.000 It's called Lunge at the Bunch.

00:16:09.000 How 80s is he?

00:16:10.000 Yeah.

00:16:11.000 He has no shame here.

00:16:12.000 What do you mean?

00:16:14.000 Dude, your musical tastes are an abandoned child who had a single mom in the 80s.

00:16:20.000 How about Good Great Fine?

00:16:21.000 Listen to this one.

00:16:24.000 Whoa, where are we going, guys?

00:16:26.000 To shit town.

00:16:27.000 No, we're not going to hear horrible music.

00:16:31.000 Sounds like the equalizer done by...

00:16:33.000 It's the equalizer done by Down syndrome.

00:16:36.000 It does kind of sound like the...

00:16:39.000 But I have some singy ones, too.

00:16:42.000 Oh, God.

00:16:43.000 What's the singing one?

00:16:44.000 Look up, boy!

00:16:46.000 Look behind yourself, Del!

00:16:49.000 Is that a song?

00:16:50.000 That's you.

00:16:51.000 No, it's not.

00:16:52.000 Let's hear your singing.

00:16:53.000 This one is about...

00:16:54.000 Was it up?

00:16:54.000 Was it down if I can't understand?

00:16:56.000 This is about like Antifa chicks, basically.

00:16:59.000 Filthy, unpretty, and not too smart.

00:17:01.000 No brains, all heart bleeding, heart, blue, hair.

00:17:06.000 A little flat there, right?

00:17:07.000 Farts in public and she just don't.

00:17:10.000 Jesus.

00:17:14.000 Or art thou, fuck her?

00:17:17.000 Why must I hate thee?

00:17:18.000 Now this part starts slapping around.

00:17:20.000 So be good, buckle in your seatbelts.

00:17:22.000 Fuck up, fuck that, fuck mom, love school, love Parma John, love what?

00:17:31.000 Yes, Parmajon.

00:17:34.000 You have pricked my ears today.

00:17:36.000 Dude, that was actually so ballsy for you to play the gayest song I've ever heard in my life.

00:17:42.000 Did you hear the...

00:17:43.000 Now you haven't heard the Dire Straits Like Solo.

00:17:49.000 No, no, go back to like, fuck this, fuck that, fuck smart.

00:17:54.000 Dude, that's so embarrassing.

00:17:56.000 How do you get Parmesan in this?

00:17:58.000 Wow.

00:17:59.000 Because she loves Parmesan.

00:18:01.000 You know when you have a cold shower and you sort of feel like cleansed?

00:18:05.000 I've been washed over with your gayness.

00:18:08.000 Brian, you have hurt me today.

00:18:10.000 That was embarrassing.

00:18:11.000 I'm not embarrassed.

00:18:13.000 I think that rules.

00:18:14.000 I took creative choices.

00:18:17.000 Wow.

00:18:18.000 That's the gayest music I've ever heard.

00:18:20.000 It's literally not.

00:18:21.000 I got, and there's plenty more.

00:18:23.000 Yeah, yeah, I'm sure there is.

00:18:24.000 Just go to my, my, no, you can go to YouTube.

00:18:27.000 You can go to YouTube Music.

00:18:28.000 You can go to Apple Music.

00:18:29.000 Jesus.

00:18:30.000 SoundCloud.

00:18:31.000 Anyway, get back to Nita Fashions.

00:18:33.000 So NitaFashions, NitaFashions.com.

00:18:36.000 Contact them on Instagram.

00:18:38.000 They will set you up with a new look.

00:18:43.000 They will, they used to go to hotel rooms and they'd measure everyone and then we'd then make you shirts and suits and shit.

00:18:51.000 But now they do it online.

00:18:54.000 And that's who I use.

00:18:55.000 That's why I look so sartorial because I use these guys.

00:19:00.000 And they, you know what's great about them too is they, when they're getting clients from our show, they interview them about the show.

00:19:10.000 And they say things like, we want more things about Gavin's theology, Gavin's faith.

00:19:16.000 We want to hear more about sit-down interviews, shit like that.

00:19:21.000 But Nita Fashions is a great way to have a perfectly tailored suit, shirt, pants for an affordable price.

00:19:29.000 I've always said It's for cheap, rich guys.

00:19:32.000 And that's how I heard about it.

00:19:33.000 When I was at Fox News, the producers there would be like, You've got to meet me at Nita Fashions.

00:19:39.000 We're doing a thing on Thursday.

00:19:41.000 Go there.

00:19:42.000 They'll measure you at the hotel.

00:19:44.000 And I know that dude personally, by the way, that's the guy.

00:19:47.000 And we'll set you up.

00:19:49.000 And it's great too.

00:19:50.000 Once they get your sort of blueprint, you can start looking at swaths and getting new shirts, new suits, new ideas.

00:19:59.000 And when you get fat, as you're wont to do, they let out your pants.

00:20:05.000 So it's fucking awesome, dude.

00:20:08.000 Get one suit.

00:20:09.000 Get a suit for funerals.

00:20:10.000 Get a suit for job interviews.

00:20:12.000 If you're blue collar and you never wear suits, you need one suit that fits you perfectly.

00:20:16.000 And you look so professional when you show up at the event and your top button isn't undone.

00:20:22.000 And it's like, wow, this guy's always in Carhartt overalls.

00:20:26.000 But now that our sister died, he looks fucking amazing.

00:20:29.000 Yeah, because he has his shit together.

00:20:32.000 Because he contacted Nita Fashions.

00:20:35.000 This nigga is asshole.

00:20:37.000 Not anymore.

00:20:38.000 Not with Nita Fashions.

00:20:40.000 When I lose 20 more pounds and I'm down to 185, I'm going to buy me a suit from Nita Fashions.

00:20:45.000 I'll buy you a suit.

00:20:46.000 There we go.

00:20:47.000 185.

00:20:48.000 So you were supposed to be dead this episode.

00:20:50.000 No.

00:20:52.000 I'm going to Skype from the hospital next week because I'll be recovering.

00:20:57.000 Okay.

00:20:59.000 I felt bad for you when you described this behind us, but I've been talking to people since, and they go, it's actually just like having a wisdom teeth pulled.

00:21:11.000 I don't know about that.

00:21:12.000 They go, it's not that crazy.

00:21:14.000 Well, I've had the cameras go up through there, but I've never had the burning of the inside of the heart.

00:21:23.000 But yeah, it's not a big deal, apparently.

00:21:25.000 You're going to live.

00:21:26.000 Oh, I plan on it.

00:21:28.000 Good news.

00:21:31.000 So we are going to dip into letters.

00:21:35.000 We're five minutes away from Letters Town.

00:21:38.000 But before we do that, we should probably explain what's been going on this past 24 hours.

00:21:46.000 Anthony Cumia raped me.

00:21:48.000 No.

00:21:49.000 Okay, I thought we were going to do that again.

00:21:52.000 You just bailed me.

00:21:52.000 I actually have a thing to say.

00:21:55.000 That's amazing.

00:21:58.000 Yeah, look up the microcorg.

00:22:01.000 Like my wife was almost in tears.

00:22:03.000 My wife is such a Midwesterner.

00:22:06.000 Forget the Indian shit.

00:22:07.000 That's irrelevant.

00:22:08.000 She's a Midwesterner and she hates conflict.

00:22:10.000 So the fact that I was mad about the microcorg, she's like, should you be coming to dinner with us?

00:22:17.000 Because I'm sick, right?

00:22:18.000 She's like, you're sick.

00:22:20.000 You're a bummer.

00:22:21.000 You're being too negative.

00:22:23.000 And then my fucking daughter, we're driving through the city and she sees Beacon Hill High School.

00:22:28.000 And she goes, oh my God, Beacon Hill High School.

00:22:31.000 That's my friend's school.

00:22:33.000 From camp, that's my friend's school.

00:22:37.000 So I obviously go, shut the fuck up.

00:22:40.000 What are you doing?

00:22:42.000 It's your friend's school?

00:22:43.000 Be quiet.

00:22:44.000 Calm down.

00:22:46.000 And then my wife is like, I can tell she's crying because I told my daughter to shut the fuck up.

00:22:52.000 Now, I wouldn't tell my daughter to shut the fuck up.

00:22:55.000 She went, oh, what the?

00:22:56.000 Beacon High School.

00:22:57.000 That's my friend's school.

00:23:00.000 She was screaming at the top of her lungs.

00:23:03.000 So I got annoyed.

00:23:05.000 Now, look up microcorg, like for beginners.

00:23:11.000 This is what I was doing all morning.

00:23:15.000 And I hate how so much of the presents my wife buys for my kids are homework assignments for me.

00:23:23.000 Okay, this is going to be really easy.

00:23:24.000 By the way, first of all, first of all, first of all, why isn't the whole fucking thing in the shot?

00:23:30.000 Why are you in the top corner?

00:23:34.000 As fast as possible.

00:23:36.000 Patch Bank.

00:23:37.000 You have one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight patch banks here.

00:23:41.000 I don't know what a patch bank is.

00:23:44.000 What's that mean?

00:23:44.000 So right now, you can ignore these bank titles.

00:23:49.000 What?

00:23:50.000 Whatever.

00:23:50.000 And then when you're in a bank, you can push these program numbers down and switch between different patches.

00:23:57.000 What are patches?

00:23:58.000 Sounds.

00:23:59.000 Okay.

00:24:01.000 So you have eight sounds per whatever, knob turn.

00:24:05.000 You know, like it says trance, whatever.

00:24:07.000 You could ignore those and you could make those banks different things.

00:24:09.000 And there's eight patches per bank.

00:24:11.000 So are those pre-programmed or is that like...

00:24:14.000 You could program them, I'm sure, but they're pre-programmed out the box.

00:24:17.000 Okay.

00:24:19.000 So these are the A patches under trance.

00:24:22.000 Oh, and then there's a B side.

00:24:23.000 So there's 16, actually.

00:24:24.000 Yeah, I can go to the B patches.

00:24:28.000 So under this trance or bank one, you have A 8A and 8B.

00:24:35.000 Is everyone as lost as me right now?

00:24:37.000 No, I get it.

00:24:39.000 Hey, look, you can make a song right now.

00:24:43.000 So look.

00:24:50.000 You know, the sad thing about these tools is that the only people smart enough to figure out how they work are retarded and make shitty music.

00:25:01.000 But then there's me, too.

00:25:02.000 Exactly.

00:25:14.000 And then I'm worried my daughter thinks that I think she's stupid.

00:25:17.000 And I'm like, no, I don't think you're stupid.

00:25:19.000 No one can figure this out.

00:25:20.000 Go back to that instructional video.

00:25:25.000 Train.

00:25:26.000 Train.

00:25:27.000 All right.

00:25:29.000 Simple stuff.

00:25:30.000 Simple.

00:25:33.000 Let's look at up here.

00:25:36.000 Okay.

00:25:37.000 I know what's going on.

00:25:38.000 Look at that chart.

00:25:39.000 Those are effects.

00:25:40.000 That is an encyclopedia of terms.

00:25:46.000 Get into talking.

00:25:47.000 For a 15-year-old girl.

00:25:50.000 Okay, but it looks like, see where it says synth?

00:25:53.000 That's only that many.

00:25:54.000 For vocorder, you got a bunch of shit.

00:25:58.000 So that's good.

00:25:59.000 Because the vocorder you don't use too much modification dials.

00:26:04.000 Let's look at these five dials up here.

00:26:07.000 And if both these lights are on, it means you're in play or performance mode.

00:26:12.000 I forget what it's called.

00:26:13.000 It doesn't really matter.

00:26:14.000 But it means that these dials up here are going to be the cutoff, Renaissance, EG attack, EG release, and temple.

00:26:21.000 It's resonance.

00:26:22.000 He said renaissance.

00:26:23.000 And have nothing to do with what's under them here.

00:26:26.000 Okay.

00:26:26.000 Okay, so what he explained, those are different characteristics of those sounds.

00:26:31.000 So like if you were to go in here, this has a very similar thing.

00:26:36.000 You pick one of these things.

00:26:37.000 See, the cutoff resonance.

00:26:40.000 You're explaining Chinese to me, and Chinese is retarded.

00:26:48.000 See, cut off, what it does, it goes or it lets it rock.

00:26:52.000 But you can cut it off, make it more staccato.

00:26:55.000 So you're going to play with that a lot.

00:26:57.000 Resonance, it's pretty easy.

00:27:00.000 Why did my daughter get this for her birthday?

00:27:02.000 It's fucking stupid.

00:27:03.000 It's a waste of time.

00:27:05.000 Kick a little cash my way.

00:27:06.000 I got some lessons.

00:27:07.000 I could probably impart some knowledge.

00:27:10.000 You know how to work a micro core?

00:27:13.000 Well, I have a similar thing, yeah.

00:27:15.000 I have a, it's not as cool.

00:27:18.000 Mine is very limited, but it's the same.

00:27:20.000 It's a MIDI controller.

00:27:22.000 Why does my daughter have something better than your retarded shit?

00:27:26.000 Because her parents, my wife spoils her.

00:27:30.000 That's true.

00:27:31.000 We spent $2,500 a day this month.

00:27:37.000 My family's just hemorrhaging cash.

00:27:40.000 I cannot.

00:27:41.000 It cannot continue.

00:27:42.000 It's insane.

00:27:46.000 She makes beats and sells beats.

00:27:47.000 That's very lucrative.

00:27:49.000 No, it's not.

00:27:50.000 Fuck it.

00:27:51.000 Selling beats?

00:27:52.000 Jesus Christ.

00:27:54.000 Tactical Walls is a veteran-owned, operated, and tactical walls.

00:27:57.000 It's designed to store and secure firearms.

00:27:59.000 But really, you can hide anything in there.

00:28:01.000 We, our office, our studio is replete with tactical walls.

00:28:08.000 Now, we can't have guns because we're in New York, so we decorate our tactical walls with motorcycle helmets, jackets, bric-a-brac.

00:28:18.000 Baseball bats.

00:28:19.000 Baseball bats.

00:28:20.000 I wish we lived in a place where you live where you could have fucking tons of guns.

00:28:25.000 But guns, grandma's prescriptions, heels and sunglasses, whips and chains, hide it all with tactical walls.

00:28:32.000 Right now, our loyaledcensor.tv subscribers get 15% off all orders of tactical walls.

00:28:38.000 Just use promo code Gavin15.

00:28:40.000 Support veteran-owned business who support us.

00:28:45.000 TacticalWalls.com, promo code Gavin15.

00:28:49.000 Now, we've had Tim at Tactical Walls on the show.

00:28:52.000 Yeah.

00:28:52.000 It didn't go great.

00:28:54.000 There we go.

00:28:56.000 Ryan has done a terrible job of his tactical walls.

00:29:00.000 And that's the great thing about Tactical Walls.

00:29:02.000 You can make it look awesome like this we see here, this mod wall, or you can make it look terrible like Ryan's thing where he has like a random mug and Billy Harmon?

00:29:14.000 Billy, what's his name?

00:29:15.000 Billy Bologna from fucking Peewee's Playhouse.

00:29:21.000 Just shockingly bad.

00:29:24.000 So Ryan's failed, as he's wont to do.

00:29:27.000 But you don't have to fail.

00:29:29.000 When you do your tactical walls, it will look awesome.

00:29:32.000 And I've seen guys who collect guns, and I've seen the handguns and the boop, boop, boop, boop, boop things with the AR-15s and the rifles and the shotguns all lining up.

00:29:42.000 It's fucking beautiful, man.

00:29:45.000 Why buy guns if you're not willing to display them beautifully?

00:29:49.000 And that's what Tactical Walls does.

00:29:51.000 All right.

00:29:53.000 We are going behind the paywall now.

00:29:55.000 We've had enough of you.

00:30:00.000 And that's that.

00:30:01.000 There's some vids, too, if you're interested.

00:30:03.000 Tons of fucking stuff that will help you out.

00:30:08.000 No, thanks.

00:30:09.000 So we're going to read a bunch of letters and hang out for the next hour and a half.

00:30:14.000 And we like you more than a friend.

00:30:15.000 And thanks for tuning in.

00:30:17.000 Goodbye.

00:30:18.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

00:30:48.000 How was your day today, Maddie?

00:30:50.000 I was alright.

00:30:50.000 Went to work for a half day.

00:30:51.000 Just ran around, took care of a few things.

00:30:54.000 Had a doctor's appointment this afternoon.

00:30:56.000 Got two tomorrow.

00:30:58.000 When's your heart operation?

00:31:00.000 Wednesday.

00:31:00.000 Tomorrow's a CAT scan and COVID test.

00:31:04.000 Pre-op procedures.

00:31:05.000 I did a COVID test yesterday because I've been feeling like shit since Monday.

00:31:12.000 They barely touched my nose.

00:31:15.000 I go, can we just do the front of the nose?

00:31:17.000 And they go, yeah, that's what we do here.

00:31:19.000 And they go, we don't need brain particles.

00:31:22.000 Right.

00:31:26.000 Do other places literally need brain particles?

00:31:29.000 Because it seems like they fucking dig in your brain.

00:31:32.000 Yeah, I've actually heard that it does serious sinus damage, like permanent sinus damage.

00:31:38.000 Yeah.

00:31:38.000 I fucking hate it so much.

00:31:41.000 I swear to God, I'd rather have Maddie Odell put his finger up my ass than have that Q-tip go into the brain again.

00:31:50.000 And every time you do it, you go, I'm never doing that again.

00:31:53.000 That's the last time.

00:31:55.000 And then you do it again.

00:31:57.000 But this one was just like this.

00:31:59.000 She went like that.

00:32:02.000 It was great.

00:32:03.000 You actually liked it.

00:32:05.000 I didn't give a shit.

00:32:06.000 And then, you know what was cool?

00:32:08.000 I went to John Sullivan's across from Cumia's studio.

00:32:13.000 And I go, I'd like a bourbon, please.

00:32:16.000 And some dude, random dude, looked like Gavin Newsome.

00:32:19.000 He's like, I am Beyond Angry.

00:32:24.000 And he paid for my drinks.

00:32:26.000 Wow.

00:32:27.000 Nice.

00:32:28.000 Yeah, he was a big fan.

00:32:30.000 Not a big fan, whatever that means.

00:32:32.000 He knew all the shit in the show.

00:32:34.000 He loved I Am Beyond Angry.

00:32:35.000 We talked for about half an hour about that guy, I Am Beyond Angry, and his beef.

00:32:43.000 His beef is the lack of wheelchair access in Portland, which I assume is the best in the world.

00:32:50.000 It should be like, are there more fucking ramps than Portland, Oregon?

00:32:57.000 I am your you.

00:32:59.000 Remember at the airport the guy recognized?

00:33:01.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:33:02.000 You and then me afterward.

00:33:04.000 And I was like, what's your favorite BERT?

00:33:05.000 And he was like, oh, the BERT, which is the bald eagle.

00:33:08.000 All right.

00:33:09.000 So now we're talking.

00:33:10.000 That's amazing how many people subscribe to this network.

00:33:12.000 But you've got to keep playing those fucking drops.

00:33:17.000 I feel like you've been sparing recently.

00:33:19.000 Yeah.

00:33:20.000 Because little kids, like my friends, our baby monster sons will be like, I am beyond angry.

00:33:28.000 When they're like three.

00:33:31.000 Come on, man.

00:33:32.000 That's the audience to me when I don't play enough.

00:33:35.000 You know, we have new bumpers, by the way.

00:33:37.000 We have a good news intro.

00:33:38.000 We have a new racism intro I have not seen.

00:33:41.000 We have another War on Kids one.

00:33:43.000 So this is good news.

00:33:44.000 Remember, it was the newest bit.

00:33:46.000 Check it out.

00:33:48.000 On the more pleasant mood, the good news is.

00:33:51.000 I'm going to go.

00:33:53.000 Congratulations.

00:33:55.000 Sorry to keep you waiting.

00:33:56.000 I cheer up for happy bits.

00:33:58.000 People eat animal dicks and jump out of helicopters.

00:34:02.000 I'm going to cry now.

00:34:03.000 I'm thinking about it.

00:34:06.000 That was amazing.

00:34:08.000 That's great.

00:34:08.000 I love that font.

00:34:10.000 Yeah.

00:34:10.000 The wiggly, squiggly font.

00:34:12.000 Yeah.

00:34:12.000 No, not this wiggly squigglyness of it.

00:34:14.000 That's a filter, but I like the original font.

00:34:17.000 Okay, what else do we got?

00:34:18.000 Racism.

00:34:20.000 I'm a black female.

00:34:22.000 What other different...

00:34:23.000 What else could I have done to piss you off?

00:34:26.000 Black woman?

00:34:28.000 This is really inconvenient.

00:34:43.000 That guy, he did that song, that DJ, to fight racism.

00:34:48.000 Was that a green screen, or was he really on the top of the Freedom Tower?

00:34:54.000 No, he was not.

00:34:55.000 I doubt it.

00:34:56.000 I don't know, dude.

00:34:58.000 Was it TS though?

00:34:59.000 Europeans are painfully corny.

00:35:03.000 George Flores.

00:35:04.000 Yes.

00:35:05.000 They are.

00:35:06.000 So that's all we have for the motion?

00:35:07.000 We have one more.

00:35:09.000 This is the war on kids.

00:35:11.000 This is V2.

00:35:12.000 So I believe it's from the same guy who did the education one.

00:35:14.000 Could be wrong.

00:35:17.000 Hello, fam.

00:35:18.000 I had a text page up right.

00:35:20.000 Who wants to pamp my bag?

00:35:22.000 We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.

00:35:28.000 Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrine.

00:35:34.000 Fun your feet!

00:35:36.000 Fuck your feet!

00:35:39.000 Damn.

00:35:39.000 Yeah, I think this show should start focusing on kids.

00:35:43.000 I think this is a new angle here.

00:35:45.000 It's the kids' show.

00:35:49.000 Gotta save them.

00:35:50.000 What?

00:35:51.000 Gotta save them from the left.

00:35:54.000 Let's see.

00:35:54.000 Transgender story timeout.

00:35:56.000 I mean, you have some fucking dumb tranny doing some dumb shit.

00:36:02.000 That doesn't mean anything unless they're teachers.

00:36:06.000 Look at this.

00:36:07.000 That looks kind of real.

00:36:07.000 No, that's real.

00:36:08.000 No, that looks real.

00:36:11.000 I was just there.

00:36:12.000 I knew we were going to do it.

00:36:15.000 Is he on the Freedom Town?

00:36:17.000 Huh?

00:36:19.000 No, that's David Guetta.

00:36:20.000 He might have been on top.

00:36:22.000 He's a pretty famous DJ.

00:36:23.000 Yeah, he was David Getta.

00:36:24.000 He was one nomad at the Korean restaurant there.

00:36:28.000 No, that's real, dude.

00:36:29.000 That's not crazy.

00:36:32.000 He has enough clouts.

00:36:33.000 He's fighting racism at the top of New York.

00:36:36.000 They used to fly him into Ibeza to play for the weekend.

00:36:39.000 Freedom Tower's back there.

00:36:40.000 So he's too close to the Empire State, I was going to say.

00:36:44.000 There we go.

00:36:44.000 He's actually uptown, isn't he?

00:36:46.000 Yeah, because there's the west side.

00:36:48.000 Yeah, he's uptown.

00:36:48.000 He's above.

00:36:53.000 No, I think Koreatown would be down here, closer to the Empire State.

00:36:58.000 So what do you think he's up at?

00:37:00.000 50-somethingeth.

00:37:02.000 Yeah.

00:37:04.000 Yeah, 50-somethingeth street.

00:37:06.000 I'm sure they'll be.

00:37:07.000 I gotta say it here.

00:37:10.000 Imagine Trump Tower.

00:37:12.000 Fucking dork.

00:37:13.000 It's like, ooh, I didn't mean to do that.

00:37:15.000 I don't know.

00:37:18.000 Okay.

00:37:21.000 You should do the segue.

00:37:24.000 Oh, yes.

00:37:25.000 Say, Ryan, shut up.

00:37:26.000 By the way, great Mets documentary on ESPN.

00:37:30.000 We're taking calls or doing it.

00:37:31.000 Started in Queens.

00:37:32.000 What?

00:37:32.000 Doing calls or mail?

00:37:35.000 Calls.

00:37:36.000 Oh, yeah, calls.

00:37:37.000 Sorry.

00:37:37.000 Okay.

00:37:39.000 You are on air.

00:37:43.000 This is a fucking loser.

00:37:47.000 Understand why.

00:37:48.000 Hey, why does everyone get two things?

00:37:50.000 You have one thing.

00:37:51.000 Thank you for calling.

00:37:52.000 It was great hearing from you.

00:37:53.000 Bye-bye.

00:37:54.000 All right, next call.

00:37:57.000 Maddie's right.

00:37:58.000 I don't know why I thought we were answering mail.

00:38:01.000 Might be because I'm drunk.

00:38:03.000 All right, so Matt, you got yours clicked on?

00:38:05.000 I'm going to click it on right now.

00:38:08.000 All right, a lot of pressure on RyGuy.

00:38:11.000 He has a baby coming.

00:38:13.000 I am going to fire him if this does not work today.

00:38:17.000 And he will be unemployed.

00:38:23.000 If I were you, I would have been here all day today.

00:38:26.000 But you decided video games and guitar were more important.

00:38:30.000 Untrue?

00:38:31.000 We did a few practice runs.

00:38:32.000 What did you do today?

00:38:33.000 Yes, we did.

00:38:35.000 I did a lot of things that I had to do, frankly.

00:38:38.000 I worked out.

00:38:40.000 Oh, okay.

00:38:40.000 Very important to me.

00:38:42.000 Important.

00:38:42.000 Important to me.

00:38:43.000 And I thought I had that cold as well.

00:38:46.000 And maybe I did.

00:38:47.000 Maybe I didn't.

00:38:48.000 I think it was because of the vape.

00:38:50.000 I had a new vape.

00:38:52.000 And I had a coil that was very strong, so I had to switch that out.

00:38:56.000 This cold sounds like that.

00:38:56.000 I had a bronchitis type thing.

00:38:58.000 You have a ski boot in your head.

00:38:59.000 No.

00:39:00.000 I just had the bronchitis type thing, but I was coughing in the middle of the night, and then I hacked up in the morning a chunk of green, and then it was red blood.

00:39:09.000 And I was like, that's bad.

00:39:10.000 After that, totally fine.

00:39:11.000 Stopped hitting the vape.

00:39:13.000 I prayed.

00:39:13.000 I was like, God, please, you know, I know, you know, whatever's going to happen is going to happen.

00:39:17.000 Imagine you're God, you create the universe, and you get a call from Ryan Catsu Rivera.

00:39:21.000 Hey, man, my new vape makes me bleed.

00:39:24.000 No, it wasn't that serious.

00:39:25.000 You're like, dude, I fucking can't help you.

00:39:27.000 It was just, you know, like, you know, leave me.

00:39:29.000 I'm in Africa right now.

00:39:30.000 Yeah.

00:39:31.000 They're fucking babies to cure AIDS.

00:39:33.000 Yeah, but they're African.

00:39:34.000 I can't help.

00:39:34.000 I can't deal with this shit right now.

00:39:37.000 It's like when the Prowboys called me from, I don't know, Cleveland.

00:39:40.000 They're like, we were at a meetup last night and some dude put a fucking rubber ducky up his ass.

00:39:46.000 Okay.

00:39:47.000 What would you like me to do?

00:39:49.000 Pull it out?

00:39:50.000 Fly down there and remove it.

00:39:53.000 Yeah, goodbye.

00:39:54.000 Rubber ducky, you're the one.

00:39:56.000 Okay.

00:39:57.000 Everything is looking kosh.

00:39:59.000 Now, the one thing we did see is echoing from the caller when he called in.

00:40:04.000 We stopped it and signed back to the bank.

00:40:06.000 Brian, don't brag until you've been successful.

00:40:09.000 Not bragging.

00:40:09.000 I'm not bragging.

00:40:10.000 It's a number one rule.

00:40:13.000 I'm looking at everything, making sure we got men's fashion.

00:40:16.000 This man is calling into us.

00:40:18.000 What's up, men's?

00:40:20.000 Gavin, did you know that you are gay?

00:40:24.000 Ouch.

00:40:25.000 I did not know that.

00:40:26.000 I'm open to it.

00:40:27.000 Okay.

00:40:28.000 Well, so you have a lot of very strict fashion rules for men.

00:40:35.000 Yep.

00:40:36.000 And as a young man leaving college, I don't know how not to dress like a frat boy or like I'm going to play basketball at the YMCA.

00:40:46.000 And I think it would be cool to do a special or like a censored where you go through how you should dress at every age.

00:40:58.000 Because one of the problems is I want to wear a suit and dress up, but if you are my age or Ryan's age and you wear a suit every day, you kind of look like a clown.

00:41:09.000 You pull off better if you're older.

00:41:12.000 Of course.

00:41:13.000 Have you bought my book Street Boners?

00:41:15.000 You need to buy my book Street Boners.

00:41:17.000 We cover this in Street Boners.

00:41:20.000 How old are you?

00:41:22.000 I'm 22.

00:41:23.000 What?

00:41:25.000 22.

00:41:26.000 Oh, I thought I said 42.

00:41:28.000 22.

00:41:29.000 And where do you live?

00:41:31.000 Jacksonville, Florida.

00:41:34.000 Okay, so it gets hot there.

00:41:36.000 So that's a tough one.

00:41:39.000 I've always said once it's over 84 degrees, all bets are off.

00:41:43.000 There can be no rules.

00:41:45.000 Whatever makes you feel comfortable, you're in a fucking oven.

00:41:49.000 But yeah, you gotta get away from flip-flops and cargo shorts.

00:41:54.000 Maybe wear low-cut chucks and gay shorts, short shorts, and Brooks Brothers polos.

00:42:05.000 I don't know, dude.

00:42:05.000 You're in a tough area as far as...

00:42:08.000 Yeah, well, that's what I wear right now.

00:42:10.000 That's just like, that's classic frat dress.

00:42:13.000 You know, I was just thinking today, not to get too gay, and I don't think this applies to you, but my winter outfit is going to be so breathtakingly gorgeous that Maddie Odell is going to have to go to de-homosexual classes.

00:42:31.000 I'm going to be so enamored by it.

00:42:33.000 I'm just going to be attracted to you.

00:42:35.000 You're going to fucking melt.

00:42:37.000 I got this hat on oldhats.com.

00:42:42.000 It's a Budweiser hat that's blue corduroy.

00:42:45.000 Nice.

00:42:46.000 Yeah, oldhats.com.

00:42:48.000 Look that up.

00:42:48.000 And thanks for calling, by the way.

00:42:50.000 So I got that hat.

00:42:52.000 And then I'm going to go on to Pendleton.

00:42:54.000 I'm going to get their vest they have.

00:42:56.000 It's all very expensive shit over there.

00:42:59.000 Yeah, it is.

00:42:59.000 But it's quality.

00:43:00.000 Quality.

00:43:01.000 Old school hats.

00:43:02.000 Look up fucking Budweiser.

00:43:05.000 The Budweiser hat I have coming any day now is going to make you jizz yourself.

00:43:11.000 That's gross.

00:43:15.000 A lot of their hats are great, by the way.

00:43:18.000 Just go Bud.

00:43:21.000 Bud Weiser.

00:43:26.000 No, it's none of those.

00:43:27.000 Get out of here, clicker.

00:43:31.000 Dude, your internet is brutal.

00:43:32.000 Let's see.

00:43:33.000 Ah, dude, it's fucking brutal.

00:43:35.000 Anyway, you got the idea.

00:43:37.000 And then Pendleton Vest.

00:43:39.000 Is it a cap or is it like a fedora style or a bucket?

00:43:41.000 No, it's a normal baseball hat, but blue corduroy.

00:43:45.000 There it is.

00:43:46.000 There it is.

00:43:47.000 This one?

00:43:48.000 Bud King of Beers.

00:43:50.000 Oh, this one.

00:43:51.000 Yeah.

00:43:51.000 You know, it does say purple, but that's okay.

00:43:54.000 That's going to be my fucking hat, bro.

00:43:56.000 Damn.

00:43:58.000 Look at the double cording on that shit.

00:44:00.000 That might be blue.

00:44:01.000 Wait, that might not be that.

00:44:02.000 The hat I'm talking about is blue corduroy.

00:44:04.000 That's not blue corduroy.

00:44:05.000 Oh, it's not corduroy.

00:44:06.000 Oh, no, it's not blue corduroy.

00:44:07.000 Anyway, you get the vibe.

00:44:08.000 So that hat, beard, long hair, Pendleton shirt, which are very, wildly expensive.

00:44:16.000 But they have these zigzaggy shirts.

00:44:19.000 And then my wife goes, no, you can't do that.

00:44:21.000 My look this winter is going to be Pendleton.

00:44:23.000 Looks like we're Pendleton.

00:44:24.000 And I'm like, we don't hang out.

00:44:28.000 You go to your things.

00:44:30.000 I go to my bar.

00:44:31.000 I haven't seen you in weeks.

00:44:34.000 Like, we went to our daughter's.

00:44:35.000 I'm going to get that fucking snap front, right?

00:44:38.000 But keep scrolling down.

00:44:40.000 And this is where Maddie's going to start getting wet.

00:44:44.000 Keep going, keep going, keep going.

00:44:46.000 Is that the one you had with the elbow patches on it, the flannel that you gave to Ryan?

00:44:51.000 Those are all like normal, cheap, fucking reasonable shirts.

00:44:57.000 These are the next level, super expensive shirts.

00:45:01.000 Next level.

00:45:01.000 Yeah.

00:45:03.000 Like $300,000, $400 a shirt.

00:45:05.000 Yeah.

00:45:06.000 Holy shit.

00:45:08.000 Well, I spent that at my fucking daughter's bullshit dinner tonight.

00:45:12.000 But wait.

00:45:13.000 Holy shit.

00:45:16.000 But wait, find the shirt, the zigzaggy shirt.

00:45:18.000 Okay.

00:45:19.000 Looking under men's wool shirts.

00:45:21.000 Shirts.

00:45:23.000 I don't know.

00:45:23.000 Wool shirts.

00:45:24.000 Yeah, wool shirts.

00:45:26.000 Dude, I'm wearing a blue Budweiser hat, and I have keep going.

00:45:33.000 Keep going, keep going, keep going.

00:45:35.000 There it is.

00:45:36.000 On the left?

00:45:37.000 Yeah.

00:45:38.000 On the left.

00:45:39.000 Okay.

00:45:39.000 And it's blue?

00:45:40.000 No, no, the other one.

00:45:41.000 The other one.

00:45:41.000 This one?

00:45:42.000 The other side.

00:45:43.000 Oh, okay.

00:45:45.000 That's the right one.

00:45:46.000 There we go.

00:45:47.000 This one.

00:45:48.000 Yes.

00:45:48.000 Shed head.

00:45:49.000 Yeah, but there's this and this.

00:45:51.000 Okay, it doesn't matter, Ryan.

00:45:52.000 Just click on it.

00:45:54.000 So you're wearing like a vest, and then you have that shirt, and then you have a blue corduroy Budweiser hat.

00:46:04.000 I mean, I might rape me.

00:46:08.000 And I wear red wings that I've had resold five times.

00:46:12.000 So they're super broken in, but the soles are brand new.

00:46:16.000 I mean, what the fuck?

00:46:19.000 That's what I'm in a mortar for right now, is a new pair of boots.

00:46:22.000 Dude, red wings.

00:46:24.000 Black red wings.

00:46:25.000 They're the greatest shoes of all time.

00:46:29.000 I've actually had mine so long that I don't like them anymore because my feet sort of come out on the side and they step in the snow.

00:46:37.000 That's what I'm talking about.

00:46:39.000 He likes it.

00:46:41.000 Anyway, I'm going to be so fucking sexy this winter.

00:46:44.000 You guys are going to fucking jizz your pussies.

00:46:47.000 Let's take a call.

00:46:48.000 Hell yeah.

00:46:50.000 Logan.

00:46:52.000 Yo, what's happening, boys?

00:46:54.000 What up?

00:46:56.000 Yo, what's up?

00:46:59.000 Yo, so I'm going to make this really quick because I know, Gavin, you get pissy when people do more than one thing.

00:47:03.000 So the first question I have for you is, what was your experience like in Thailand?

00:47:08.000 Because I know you sort of briefly mentioned that you did English there for a little while.

00:47:13.000 If I remember correctly, you sort of Taiwan, okay.

00:47:18.000 Yeah.

00:47:19.000 Yeah, I wonder if you could sort of elaborate, you know, your experience there as a white guy doing that whole thing.

00:47:25.000 Well, this is all in my hit book, Death of Cool.

00:47:28.000 But yeah, it was a fucking weird experience because it's a completely different universe.

00:47:35.000 They don't have the same ups and downs as us.

00:47:39.000 They don't have the same standards as us.

00:47:43.000 They don't give a shit about life.

00:47:46.000 And that's why I think it's funny that China is like, we're going to take over Taiwan.

00:47:50.000 It's not a separate country.

00:47:52.000 And I'm like, yeah, it is basically the same.

00:47:55.000 You guys feel the same about everything.

00:47:57.000 But why do you care about Taiwan?

00:48:00.000 No, actually, I misunderstood it.

00:48:02.000 My stupid ass about you said Thailand, which happens to be like the ladyboy land.

00:48:06.000 So I was like, maybe he's got some like ladyboy stories he hasn't sourced or something.

00:48:11.000 Yeah, there's no ladyboy stories.

00:48:12.000 Thanks for calling.

00:48:13.000 Next call.

00:48:17.000 We have Mongols in Vegas.

00:48:21.000 I guess that's what this is.

00:48:22.000 541, mainline.

00:48:25.000 Hey, what's up, boys?

00:48:26.000 Hey, what's up, dude?

00:48:27.000 What's going on?

00:48:28.000 What's up, man?

00:48:29.000 Hey, so you very topical call-in tonight.

00:48:32.000 First thing, the I Beyond Angry little creature, I went to Vegas a couple weeks ago, so I had to go downtown Portland to get some new Super Gay Shorts Strawberry Bowls.

00:48:43.000 And that little creature hangs out around Foxtower, downtown Portland.

00:48:47.000 Wait a minute.

00:48:47.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:48:49.000 Stop the press.

00:48:50.000 You met a drop?

00:48:51.000 You are familiar with a human drop?

00:48:56.000 Wait a minute.

00:48:57.000 Wait a minute.

00:48:58.000 He looks like if Kirby and a garbage pail kid had a baby.

00:49:02.000 That's really fucking true.

00:49:04.000 You came across I Am Beyond Angry?

00:49:08.000 Yeah, so dude, he's got a little spot down there with him and his, I'll call it his cadre.

00:49:14.000 And they're down there probably, well, I don't go down downtown Portland very often, but the last like two times I've been down there, they hang it around Fox Tower because there's a bunch of construction going on down there, so they can't kick him off the sidewalk.

00:49:27.000 So he just sits there being beyond angry all day.

00:49:31.000 Dude, he's got his little sign and his little water bottle and his little chase.

00:49:36.000 I think he's got like a little colostomy bag, too, I think.

00:49:39.000 But what's his sign say?

00:49:42.000 His sign talks about whatever is currently in the news in Portland.

00:49:46.000 So if it's like, fucking, pigeons aren't getting fed down at the waterfront or like, don't make us clean up our needles, he's got a sign for the day.

00:49:56.000 So next time I go down there, if I see him, I'll take a picture and I'll send it to you.

00:49:58.000 Yeah, I'd love that.

00:49:59.000 Boy, that'd be great.

00:50:01.000 So it made me think about it.

00:50:02.000 So Maddie, so I went down there, bought my super gay board shorts, then went to Vegas like two weeks ago, three weeks ago, and was at the MGM pool.

00:50:12.000 And we're floating around there in the Blaze River, and come around a corner, and there's some big old boys.

00:50:18.000 And this guy stands up out of the water, and he has a Mongols Nation tattoo across his back.

00:50:24.000 Back patch.

00:50:24.000 And I stop all my boys.

00:50:26.000 I'm like, hey, fucking avoid that dude at all of us.

00:50:32.000 If we just got normal guys out drinking civilians?

00:50:34.000 Yeah, stay away from the civilian.

00:50:35.000 Yeah.

00:50:36.000 Yeah, no, no, no.

00:50:37.000 So it's super funny.

00:50:38.000 So we float around four or five more times, and they're actually pretty cool.

00:50:41.000 Like they're cheers and beers with guys.

00:50:43.000 And then probably about an hour into it, this blonde dip shit goes, the guy standing, he's got his back to everybody.

00:50:50.000 He goes, hey, Genghis, gone, sweet tattoo.

00:50:54.000 And I almost shit my pants because I'm like, oh, you don't know who you're talking to.

00:51:00.000 And they were actually super cool to the guy.

00:51:03.000 And he puts his arm around him, like brings him into the little circle of death.

00:51:07.000 And the guy proceeds to just get out of the pool and leave.

00:51:10.000 And we don't see him the whole rest of the time.

00:51:11.000 And we come back around, and he's got like six buckets of beers for the dude.

00:51:14.000 So who knows what he said to him?

00:51:16.000 But God bless those guys for having that much scary power.

00:51:20.000 Yeah.

00:51:21.000 But yeah.

00:51:22.000 So anyway, and Maddie, your surgery.

00:51:24.000 So my best friend is a cardiologist.

00:51:26.000 This guy's got a lot to contribute to this call.

00:51:29.000 We're like fourth wave of input here.

00:51:33.000 Well, I'm sorry, dude.

00:51:35.000 You let me talk.

00:51:35.000 I mean, you can say have a nice call, and I'll stop talking.

00:51:38.000 But anyway, you got nothing to worry about.

00:51:40.000 You got nothing to worry about.

00:51:41.000 My buddy's a cardiologist.

00:51:42.000 We watched the show last week, and he's like, dude, it's so routine.

00:51:46.000 It's not even funny.

00:51:47.000 He did say, stop being a fat piece of shit, though.

00:51:50.000 Keep losing weight.

00:51:50.000 And you're not going to die before the age of, you know, your next birthday.

00:51:54.000 So anyway, guys.

00:51:56.000 All right.

00:51:56.000 Thanks.

00:51:56.000 Come on.

00:51:57.000 Thank you.

00:51:57.000 Love you, boys.

00:51:57.000 Fat piece of shit.

00:51:58.000 You're not really a fat piece of shit.

00:52:00.000 I've lost 30 pounds.

00:52:01.000 Yeah, you're good.

00:52:02.000 If you look at my first.

00:52:03.000 You look pretty slim to me.

00:52:06.000 If you look at my first free speech I did with you at the duck.

00:52:08.000 Yeah.

00:52:09.000 And then you look at me now, you basically have a chin now.

00:52:13.000 Yeah, I'm starting to get my neck structure back.

00:52:17.000 Fat piece of shit.

00:52:20.000 I was.

00:52:21.000 I love the way people talk to people.

00:52:23.000 Hey, man, stop being a huge piece of shit that everyone wants to puke when they look at.

00:52:28.000 He has to be nice to the Mongols guy because he was in person there.

00:52:30.000 But Matt's far away.

00:52:32.000 Is it the Mongols or the Pagans or the Banditos where if you say something remotely negative about them?

00:52:37.000 Well, that's any club.

00:52:38.000 If you disparage the club, they're going to try to.

00:52:40.000 But in that situation there, I mean, I know in the Hells Angels Motorcycle Club, if the guy's been in the club, you have to be in the club for a certain amount of time before you can get a full back patch.

00:52:52.000 So the guy had been, obviously, in the Mongols for a while.

00:52:54.000 I don't know if that's the same rules for them, but I'm sure they're similar.

00:52:58.000 But the Mongols are disproportionately obsessed with someone saying something bad about them.

00:53:03.000 Well, most clubs are.

00:53:06.000 Really?

00:53:07.000 Now, there's the thing.

00:53:10.000 The Mongols and Hell's Angels all have had problems in casinos in Nevada.

00:53:15.000 Like in 2002, they had the big shootout with the Laughlin River Run, and it's a big shootout.

00:53:20.000 What was that based on?

00:53:22.000 Hells Angels and Mongols met up in Harris Casino.

00:53:28.000 And they started talking.

00:53:29.000 And other Hells Angels came, and it just kicked off.

00:53:33.000 And three people got killed.

00:53:35.000 It was a big shootout in Texas.

00:53:38.000 I know, I remember it.

00:53:38.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:53:39.000 And it was like $3 million.

00:53:41.000 Legal fees.

00:53:42.000 Usually.

00:53:43.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:53:44.000 But why did it kick off?

00:53:46.000 Like, why can't these fucking biker clubs unite?

00:53:51.000 Most people don't even know why.

00:53:52.000 They dominate the new membership political conversation.

00:53:56.000 Most new members don't know why.

00:53:57.000 It's just because they've been told, oh, they're their enemies, that we hate each other and rockies.

00:54:02.000 It's all bullshit.

00:54:03.000 I mean, killing each other in public places is bad for everybody.

00:54:08.000 It brings the heat on everyone.

00:54:13.000 If biker clubs united, they would be a bigger force than, I don't know, if they all got together, they would be definitely a force to reckon with.

00:54:25.000 Yeah.

00:54:27.000 But, you know, there's bad apples in every group, and some people don't want to let old things die.

00:54:34.000 Well, here's the inherent problem.

00:54:36.000 If you're attracted to a biker club, you like conflict.

00:54:41.000 You're a tough guy.

00:54:42.000 Right.

00:54:42.000 And so you want to...

00:54:45.000 You're not into cool.

00:54:47.000 You're not the whole mysticism and romantic side of being the outlaw, the women.

00:54:52.000 There's always that, I don't know, they say qua.

00:54:55.000 People are intrigued by it.

00:54:57.000 They sequa.

00:54:58.000 And, you know, they're enamored by it.

00:55:00.000 They want to know more about it.

00:55:01.000 They want to hang out in the fringes.

00:55:03.000 But, you know, we used to say, I used to tell people all the time, yo, if you hang out with the junkyard dog long enough, you're going to get bit.

00:55:09.000 So they don't want unity.

00:55:12.000 They don't want peace.

00:55:13.000 Right.

00:55:14.000 They'd rather be left alone.

00:55:16.000 That's what brought them to club in the first place.

00:55:18.000 Right.

00:55:19.000 There comes a certain, I don't want to say celebrity with it, but it does.

00:55:25.000 People want to come up.

00:55:26.000 People get stupid.

00:55:27.000 When people get drunk, they want to see how tough you are.

00:55:29.000 All sorts of stuff.

00:55:30.000 All movements need faggots like me to get in there and say, look, let's be friends.

00:55:36.000 Can we just talk?

00:55:38.000 Even the Prowboys at Westfest this weekend, there was two separate groups.

00:55:43.000 And I'm like, what the fuck?

00:55:45.000 Why are there two separate groups here?

00:55:47.000 Why are half of you going to Anthony Coomi's thing and half of you renting a house down the street?

00:55:54.000 And they started explaining it to me.

00:55:56.000 And the explanation was so fucking retarded.

00:56:00.000 It was like, look, here's the deal.

00:56:02.000 So I got accused of doxing another Prowboy.

00:56:05.000 But what I was doing was they said, he said that he was a mortician.

00:56:09.000 And if you're a mortician, you're registered as a mortician.

00:56:14.000 So I looked him up and his wife was registered as a mortician.

00:56:18.000 Shut up, Janet.

00:56:20.000 But he wasn't.

00:56:22.000 And so he kept pushing himself as a mortician.

00:56:24.000 He's fucking lying, dude.

00:56:27.000 And I'm like, okay.

00:56:30.000 So someone was dishonest about their job.

00:56:34.000 I don't fucking care.

00:56:35.000 This is why there's a coup?

00:56:37.000 This is why there's a split.

00:56:39.000 This is the big division.

00:56:41.000 Well, lying is an automatic kickout in Hell's Angels, too.

00:56:45.000 Great.

00:56:46.000 Because if you lie about something, the reasoning behind it is if you lie about something as frivolous as that, when something happens, that's, you know, you can't be trusted.

00:56:57.000 And I don't think it's a good question.

00:56:58.000 That's a good point, actually.

00:56:59.000 Yeah.

00:57:00.000 If you're going to lie about something that's so irrelevant and so, like, look, my wife owns, she's a mortician.

00:57:06.000 We own a funeral home.

00:57:07.000 I go in there and I do the work too, but I'm not a licensed mortician.

00:57:10.000 That kind of explains it a little better.

00:57:13.000 But to say that you're a licensed and registered mortician, then you're developing and you're alive.

00:57:20.000 Big chim.

00:57:21.000 Okay, I think it's time for me to come clean.

00:57:24.000 Uh-oh.

00:57:27.000 And I'm not happy about this.

00:57:33.000 I'm saying this on the show live.

00:57:35.000 I want this to be on record.

00:57:39.000 I was never in Iraq.

00:57:42.000 I didn't sign up for shit.

00:57:47.000 I was never arrested for a DUI after coming back from Iraq.

00:57:53.000 That's a lie.

00:57:56.000 I'm ashamed of that, too.

00:58:00.000 When I went to jail, I did not beat the shit out of six black dudes.

00:58:07.000 That's a lie.

00:58:09.000 And it's a lie I'm not proud of.

00:58:12.000 Arnold Schwarzenegger did not see me beat up those black dudes.

00:58:18.000 He was not in the jail at the time.

00:58:21.000 As you may have guessed, he could afford bail.

00:58:23.000 He would not be hanging out at random prisons in San Bernardino.

00:58:30.000 Furthermore, I did not go to his dojo.

00:58:34.000 Arnold Schwarzenegger does not have a dojo.

00:58:38.000 He does not have any kind of a training camp for conflict.

00:58:44.000 Furthermore, if you can believe there's another furthermore, at the bar I work at as a bartender, two men did not appear with shotguns in hand.

00:58:57.000 And I did not disarm them and beat the shit out of them with their own guns and then tell them they have to leave now or forever hold their peace.

00:59:06.000 So I've been dishonest with you.

00:59:09.000 But I did lose my car during Ida.

00:59:14.000 And I would appreciate anything you can do to get me a new car.

00:59:18.000 I need $5,000.

00:59:20.000 We are up to $1,500.

00:59:26.000 And $56.

00:59:30.000 We're getting there.

00:59:32.000 And I think if you keep believing in yourselves and in me, we could get there.

00:59:37.000 Can you show the GoFundMe, Ryan?

00:59:40.000 Of course I can.

00:59:42.000 Anything for somebody who's so upfront and honest and apologetic.

00:59:46.000 But Gavin, I think you're confusing yourself with Joseph Tonelli.

00:59:50.000 Nope.

00:59:52.000 You are Joe Tonelli?

00:59:53.000 He is.

00:59:53.000 I am Joe Tonelli.

00:59:55.000 You'll notice I have to do this.

00:59:57.000 You've never seen us in the same room.

01:00:02.000 There is the Joe.

01:00:03.000 The greatest lie that has ever been told, I think there's a thing called the big lie with the noise.

01:00:08.000 127.

01:00:08.000 And they talk about the big lie.

01:00:10.000 The greatest lie that has ever been told, Joe Tonelli told.

01:00:15.000 And he said, I am seeing a therapist to deal with my lies.

01:00:19.000 Yeah.

01:00:20.000 Because I lie too much.

01:00:22.000 And that was a lie.

01:00:24.000 That is in the Smithsonian as the greatest lie ever told.

01:00:29.000 He is the king of liars.

01:00:31.000 I am going to lie therapy.

01:00:34.000 Look at him.

01:00:35.000 He's a monkey.

01:00:38.000 He's a monkey.

01:00:40.000 He's a cute, adorable monkey.

01:00:43.000 Well, are we serious?

01:00:44.000 What are we doing this now?

01:00:46.000 Oh, really?

01:00:47.000 Oh, really?

01:00:48.000 Between that and the shitting himself and lying about.

01:00:51.000 Constantly shitting his pants.

01:00:52.000 That doesn't make sense.

01:00:53.000 I went into the bathroom.

01:00:55.000 Covered in shit.

01:00:56.000 And I seen two shit painted on the wall.

01:00:59.000 What?

01:01:00.000 I went in the bathroom the other day.

01:01:01.000 It was like two shit drops on the wall.

01:01:03.000 I said, oh, my God.

01:01:04.000 No fucking way.

01:01:06.000 On the wall, there's shit drops on the wall.

01:01:08.000 Between the toilet and this fucking wall.

01:01:10.000 That doesn't happen.

01:01:11.000 People don't do that.

01:01:12.000 I'm taking a picture of the urinal, and I look over and I'm like, I am the anus of a 70-year-old gay man who grew up in studio 54.

01:01:19.000 My anus is a mess.

01:01:22.000 I've never left like turds on walls.

01:01:26.000 Why are there turds on the wall?

01:01:28.000 Dude, you know what you should do?

01:01:31.000 I think, is that you put poop on the walls, you blame him, and then has he ever come forward about, like, has he ever been honest?

01:01:39.000 He has literally...

01:01:40.000 Has he ever admitted it?

01:01:41.000 He's ever been honest in his life about anything that's closest to the wall.

01:01:45.000 He has left piles of shit.

01:01:46.000 Wait a minute.

01:01:47.000 Jesus Christ.

01:01:47.000 Matty.

01:01:48.000 Hold on a second.

01:01:48.000 I have an idea, though.

01:01:49.000 What are you talking about?

01:01:51.000 So there's pellets of poo on the walls?

01:01:54.000 It's like smear marks.

01:01:57.000 What do you mean smear marks?

01:01:58.000 Like two drops of diarrhea shit hit the wall.

01:02:02.000 Where?

01:02:03.000 In against between the toilet and the wall where it's like only a little space.

01:02:07.000 What height?

01:02:08.000 Below the toilet.

01:02:10.000 Oh, okay.

01:02:10.000 So six inches.

01:02:12.000 Six to eight, six to ten inches.

01:02:15.000 Is it smeared by the hand?

01:02:17.000 No, it looks like drops.

01:02:20.000 So it's a explosion from an anus.

01:02:24.000 Yes.

01:02:26.000 And so it's dripping down.

01:02:27.000 Yes.

01:02:28.000 Has a downward trajectory.

01:02:30.000 I had to get the forensics out, you know.

01:02:32.000 Shit.

01:02:33.000 Blood droplets.

01:02:35.000 Yeah.

01:02:36.000 There's shit everywhere!

01:02:38.000 Damn it!

01:02:38.000 But he's also shit in that side of the toilet.

01:02:42.000 And it's been there for days.

01:02:43.000 I'm like, what the fuck is that spell?

01:02:45.000 And I looked over there and it was a pile of shit.

01:02:47.000 Look what he did.

01:02:48.000 He shit all!

01:02:49.000 I sent you pictures of it.

01:02:52.000 Recently?

01:02:53.000 No, probably six, seven months ago.

01:02:57.000 Wow.

01:02:58.000 So my idea.

01:02:59.000 Remember one time he shit on top of the back of the toilet?

01:03:02.000 Yeah, that took me six months to solve.

01:03:04.000 Yeah.

01:03:06.000 But you knew.

01:03:07.000 He shit on the side of the toilet.

01:03:09.000 What do you mean side of it?

01:03:10.000 On the floor?

01:03:10.000 Because you knew it was him, but you meant like, how did it happen?

01:03:13.000 He had shit all over his face.

01:03:15.000 So you have the perfect.

01:03:17.000 The question was, and it was like a Rubik's Cube.

01:03:21.000 I would look at it for hours every day.

01:03:24.000 If you look in your pictures that I've sent you, it's probably in there.

01:03:27.000 You can get him to admit it was him if you shit or put shit on the walls and you blame him for it.

01:03:33.000 And then he's like, no, no, no, I didn't do that one.

01:03:35.000 I did the other ones.

01:03:36.000 I didn't do that one.

01:03:37.000 No, bullshit.

01:03:38.000 Maybe then you can.

01:03:38.000 Okay, I'm going to send this to you and you can.

01:03:42.000 Oh, man.

01:03:45.000 You can try to figure this out on your own time.

01:03:48.000 But I spent hundreds of hours.

01:03:51.000 Like, remember in the 9-11 episodes, I was like, it took me 10 years to realize my friend Derek was lying about how his mom was doing photocopies that day.

01:04:03.000 And then 20 years later, I realized that my friend Sprague was lying about how he's piling body parts onto pallets before the towers collapsed.

01:04:16.000 How did you deke out the towers collapsing?

01:04:18.000 So this is what was going on at the bar.

01:04:26.000 Now, here's my 200-hour theory.

01:04:31.000 So he has, what's it called?

01:04:34.000 Crohn's disease.

01:04:35.000 Crohn's disease.

01:04:36.000 Allegedly.

01:04:36.000 So he has toilet paper up his ass at all times, right?

01:04:41.000 And shit is just like being pushed out like Nutella 24 hours a day.

01:04:47.000 So once in a while, it becomes too much of a burden.

01:04:50.000 And we know this is a fact, by the way, because he has shit-stained jeans.

01:04:55.000 He's getting on the side of his legs, everything.

01:04:58.000 He's covered at shit.

01:05:00.000 He's a monkey.

01:05:02.000 He's a monkey.

01:05:03.000 He's a monkey's grooming.

01:05:05.000 It reaches a breaking point.

01:05:07.000 So he goes, uh-oh, I got to go to the bathroom.

01:05:10.000 So he goes to the bathroom and he's like, uh-oh, I got to get rid of this.

01:05:16.000 So he grabs his gross, like giant thing of shit and he throws it in the toilet, right?

01:05:24.000 And then he closes the lid and then he pulls up his pants and runs out.

01:05:33.000 What he doesn't realize is that it didn't go down into the toilet.

01:05:37.000 It stayed on the ledge.

01:05:39.000 And then when he put the seat down, he smushed it and he made like, you know the Play-Doh thing where you push the hair out the barbershop?

01:05:51.000 He pushed the lid down and it pushed the barbershop out the back.

01:05:59.000 Which is why, meanwhile, my underwear is all over the place.

01:06:03.000 Which is why it was all smushed like that.

01:06:08.000 That's my theory.

01:06:10.000 Oh, I wish I had the pictures.

01:06:11.000 That theory, by the way, took me, I would say, 132 hours.

01:06:19.000 Because you look at that yourself and you're like, oh, that's gross, whatever.

01:06:22.000 Now, if you zoom out, Ryan, on that picture, you see the tiles on the left there?

01:06:28.000 Yes.

01:06:29.000 That's where the shit drops are.

01:06:30.000 Okay, what?

01:06:31.000 On that area.

01:06:32.000 Okay, what if he did the same thing but smushed it fast and it sprayed on the walls and then he and then he.

01:06:39.000 But then also, on the floor in between that area on the top, he's shit literally on the floor.

01:06:50.000 He totally missed the toilet.

01:06:53.000 Like when we say this guy's annoying, we don't just mean he's like a silly loser who's not in the in crowd.

01:06:59.000 We mean like he shits himself and he shits the bar.

01:07:02.000 He shits mysteries.

01:07:03.000 He shits our bar.

01:07:05.000 And then it doesn't even become currently to either clean it up, like he just runs out.

01:07:10.000 Wow.

01:07:11.000 It's like, what the fuck are you doing?

01:07:12.000 Wow.

01:07:13.000 You're going to foul the bathroom and then fucking leave?

01:07:15.000 I've shit my pants in public before I go, oh my God.

01:07:19.000 Jesus.

01:07:20.000 I get my underwear out.

01:07:21.000 I wash my ass.

01:07:23.000 I wrap it up in paper towels.

01:07:25.000 I put my underwear in the garbage.

01:07:27.000 I like clean my butt cheeks.

01:07:29.000 When you walk in after I've shit myself, you'd think that like Doris Day just had her prom.

01:07:37.000 It's beautiful.

01:07:40.000 Joe, he throws his fucking Nutella underwear into the Play-Doh barbershop and then he closes it and it oozes out the back.

01:07:51.000 Oh, it's disgusting.

01:07:53.000 Did you see the videos I took of him passed out?

01:07:59.000 Now we're spending a lot of time on...

01:08:01.000 Oh, the DJ was at Top of the Rock, by the way.

01:08:04.000 Somebody sent it.

01:08:06.000 Top of the Rock.

01:08:07.000 So what is that?

01:08:08.000 What is that, Rockefeller Center?

01:08:09.000 Yes.

01:08:11.000 Okay, I'm going to send you some videos of Joe being awesome.

01:08:16.000 Oh, yeah.

01:08:17.000 He is a monkey.

01:08:21.000 What do I do with airdrop?

01:08:23.000 No people found.

01:08:24.000 I have to turn on my Wi-Fi.

01:08:28.000 It should be censored Mac available now.

01:08:31.000 Here we go.

01:08:35.000 There you go.

01:08:36.000 Is that coming through?

01:08:37.000 They are.

01:08:38.000 Yeah, the two drops went.

01:08:40.000 I mean, the thing about comedy is you have to choose your targets, right?

01:08:45.000 So you don't want to choose like a vet or a handicapped person or someone who like has breast cancer.

01:08:52.000 That's not funny.

01:08:53.000 But when you find some fucking asshole who got a $100 tip on Memorial Day for pretending he was a Marine.

01:09:05.000 Yeah.

01:09:06.000 Combat veteran.

01:09:07.000 I can fucking roast this guy.

01:09:10.000 He lies about everything though.

01:09:11.000 Like audience needs to know that not one word that comes out of this man's mouth is true or accurate about anything.

01:09:19.000 Audience, if this, baby monsters, if this was a guy who was struggling and his daughter was like trying to get through college and he was working at McDonald's to get her through, do you think we'd be sitting here fucking with him, mocking him?

01:09:32.000 Absolutely not.

01:09:33.000 That's not how we operate.

01:09:35.000 We don't punch down.

01:09:36.000 That's fucking lame.

01:09:37.000 It's not funny.

01:09:38.000 This guy's a fucking asshole who rips people off.

01:09:42.000 He lies.

01:09:43.000 He shits his pants.

01:09:45.000 He's lied about having a daughter.

01:09:46.000 He's lied about having a granddaughter.

01:09:48.000 His daughter tried to commit suicide by taking Xanax.

01:09:52.000 They found her floating in a bathtub.

01:09:54.000 And patrons of the bar are like, look, here's my credit card.

01:09:57.000 Buy a flight.

01:09:58.000 Go out there right now.

01:09:59.000 Wow.

01:10:00.000 Oh, no, she's not really talking to me right now.

01:10:02.000 Well, you joined that biker club, Fourth Watch, right?

01:10:07.000 Yeah.

01:10:08.000 And they're like a silly biker club.

01:10:13.000 Which is no longer around.

01:10:14.000 They're done?

01:10:15.000 I think so.

01:10:16.000 That's what I heard.

01:10:18.000 They had like 1,400 members.

01:10:21.000 Maybe that charter.

01:10:22.000 I don't know if it's an international...

01:10:24.000 It's a law enforcement charter.

01:10:26.000 It's like cops and firemen and stuff who want to become bikers.

01:10:30.000 And Joe was neither.

01:10:32.000 Here's Joe.

01:10:33.000 There he is.

01:10:34.000 Passed out in all his glory.

01:10:35.000 So let's show the video.

01:10:38.000 Oh.

01:10:40.000 You know what?

01:10:41.000 I did not get a video.

01:10:42.000 I got two picks.

01:10:44.000 What?

01:10:44.000 Are you sure?

01:10:45.000 I'm sure.

01:10:46.000 You could probably just send them by regular text.

01:10:49.000 If transfer failed, please try again.

01:10:52.000 Oh, try to leave the phone open.

01:10:55.000 Not blaming you.

01:10:56.000 I'm just saying that does help.

01:10:57.000 Okay.

01:10:59.000 Isn't it funny how you try to text people shit and it, I mean, sorry, you try to email people shit and it never works.

01:11:07.000 And then you text people things.

01:11:10.000 You can send them like Star Wars.

01:11:12.000 You can send them the 50 gigabytes.

01:11:17.000 Well, that means you're gay.

01:11:22.000 Amazing, isn't it?

01:11:24.000 That was great.

01:11:24.000 Sometimes the gods of the drop speak, and then they say.

01:11:28.000 I can't believe I went to a bar in Manhattan and some guy was like, I am beyond angry.

01:11:37.000 You emailed it, right?

01:11:39.000 No, I texted.

01:11:40.000 All right, let's take a call.

01:11:42.000 Okay.

01:11:45.000 Auto screen tail.

01:11:47.000 Fuck a call.

01:11:47.000 Are you sure we didn't do mail before, Maddie?

01:11:50.000 No, we didn't do mail.

01:11:51.000 No, mail.

01:11:52.000 No, the purpose of Thursday nights was only mail.

01:11:55.000 Oh.

01:11:56.000 We didn't do mail.

01:11:57.000 Yes, we did.

01:11:58.000 No, we didn't.

01:11:59.000 Yes, we fucking did.

01:12:01.000 Tonight?

01:12:02.000 Not tonight, but Thursday nights was meant to be mail only.

01:12:05.000 Oh, okay.

01:12:07.000 Just the boys.

01:12:08.000 Go ahead, Caller.

01:12:10.000 Hey, guys.

01:12:11.000 First time caller, longtime baby monster.

01:12:15.000 I just want to jump into it here, though.

01:12:18.000 Gavin, you consistently extolled Rudy Giuliani for his broken windows cleanup of New York, which I think, you know, I think he did a wonderful job.

01:12:30.000 But in the same breath, you're avidly against the war on drugs.

01:12:36.000 And in my perspective, that's kind of like a nationwide application of broken windows.

01:12:41.000 So I was kind of just hoping that you would expand on what you think is different about the war on drugs and why you're against that, but you're with broken windows.

01:12:53.000 Wow, that's a great question.

01:12:55.000 At 10.15 on a Thursday night.

01:13:00.000 I think it's an unwinnable war.

01:13:02.000 I think that marijuana, all of these gang wars, everything you see in prison at Rikers, at Governor, at Bear Hill, all of these jails, all these prisons is tangentially related to the drug war.

01:13:20.000 Stop it.

01:13:21.000 You're not going to win it.

01:13:23.000 It needs to end today.

01:13:26.000 And I think that the only way, like in your version of events, right, we nip it in the bud, it's like turnstile hopping, and we get guys who grew pot, and we throw them in jail for 10 years, like animals.

01:13:43.000 Well, not to get too anecdotal, but here in my town, we have human trafficking issues, as most towns do.

01:13:54.000 And the girls that are often trafficked by these traffickers, you know, view the traffickers as boyfriends, and they won't.

01:14:04.000 But as soon as drugs are legal, they don't have any authority.

01:14:06.000 They cease to be.

01:14:09.000 Well, what I'm saying is, the drug offenses are often what gets these traffickers in jail because it's easier to prove up that case as opposed to trying to get a human trafficked girl who thinks this trafficker is her boyfriend to testify.

01:14:25.000 Maddie, can you handle this?

01:14:27.000 Well, the human trafficking, most get their girls, runaways or drug addicts, and they hang around with the girl, the boyfriends or pimps or traffickers because they supply them with drugs.

01:14:42.000 If drugs are legal and you can buy them anywhere and it's regulated and taxed, they don't have to go to the CD boyfriends and traffickers and deal with those sorts.

01:14:55.000 Yeah, I mean, I think that's fair.

01:14:56.000 I don't know.

01:14:57.000 I just, from the prosecuting perspective, it's much easier to prove up these drug cases against these traffickers than it is the trafficking.

01:15:09.000 Yeah, I mean, if you think that eliminates trafficking, I guess that does make sense.

01:15:13.000 How far you don't human trafficking.

01:15:17.000 Oh, human trafficking.

01:15:19.000 Oh, I thought we were talking about the war on drugs.

01:15:23.000 Well, right.

01:15:24.000 It's like catching the murderers with the turnstile jumpers.

01:15:28.000 You catch a lot of traffickers with the drug offenses.

01:15:32.000 Yeah, I get what you're saying, but that's not the right way to go about it because, I mean, at the end of the day, the amount of human trafficking and drug trafficking kind of go hand in hand,

01:15:47.000 but not really.

01:15:48.000 There's more people that deal a lot of drugs that would rather not deal with human trafficking.

01:15:52.000 I mean, pimps, prostitutes, hoes, whatever you want to call them, human trafficking ranks, you know, they're going to do it regardless if they're going to kidnap the girls or whatever.

01:16:04.000 I mean, I get what you're saying now.

01:16:05.000 You know how you're going to catch the drug dealers or the war on drugs?

01:16:10.000 You have a really good point, and I have to admit, I'm kind of taken aback.

01:16:14.000 I feel side-blinded.

01:16:19.000 Blindsided.

01:16:20.000 Blindsided by this?

01:16:21.000 It's not a joke.

01:16:22.000 But do you think that the war on drugs is working?

01:16:27.000 I mean, is there any hope for it ever solving anything?

01:16:33.000 Let's start with that.

01:16:38.000 Any criminal worth of salt can get any illicit street drug.

01:16:42.000 It shouldn't be a problem.

01:16:44.000 I can get you any drug in the world.

01:16:47.000 Literally.

01:16:48.000 Prescription or non-prescription or party drugs.

01:16:51.000 Any drug in the world.

01:16:52.000 The way I'm looking at it is it's similar to, you know, the people who are going to traffic in drugs are the same people that are going to be committing the robberies, the murders, the trafficking, and stuff like that.

01:17:03.000 Well, large-scale trafficking are done by most of the cartels or organized dealings.

01:17:09.000 They're not, you know, they want money.

01:17:14.000 They don't want women.

01:17:15.000 Women, I mean, the human trafficking is probably more low-level shit.

01:17:19.000 Like, they're pushing girls to go on back page and all that other bullshit and prostitute, run hotels.

01:17:25.000 You know, you're ripping off jobs for a little bit.

01:17:28.000 That's petty cash.

01:17:29.000 Drug traffickers are making hundreds of millions of dollars.

01:17:31.000 You think they give two fucks about women?

01:17:33.000 No.

01:17:34.000 They want their money.

01:17:35.000 They want to make sure the shipments get through.

01:17:36.000 They want to buy pilots.

01:17:40.000 Yeah.

01:17:41.000 Well, I don't know.

01:17:42.000 I guess my head always goes back to what Gavin's example that he often uses, right?

01:17:48.000 The turnstile jumpers, we end up nabbing quite a few people that, hey, if you're going to do turnstile jumping, you also don't care about this, this, this, and this, and you'll end up committing certain other crimes.

01:18:01.000 And so I think that theory kind of applies to drug offenses as well.

01:18:06.000 Yeah, but you're right, Matty.

01:18:07.000 This guy's pretty good.

01:18:08.000 This is a good point.

01:18:09.000 You're not going to catch the kingpin jumping a turnstile.

01:18:13.000 Like, he's not taking the training.

01:18:14.000 Right, but this guy's saying that jumping turnstiles really helped New York get rid of a lot of bad dudes.

01:18:22.000 Well, Giuliani came in and he Disneyfied Times Square.

01:18:26.000 Yeah, he said, if you're jumping a turnstile, you probably have a gun.

01:18:30.000 There's something else going on.

01:18:32.000 And he got a bunch of bad dudes.

01:18:33.000 So this guy's saying, okay, by those same rights, let's enforce anti-drug laws, and we'll get even bigger dudes.

01:18:42.000 Well, Juliani.

01:18:43.000 Maybe he's right.

01:18:44.000 He also did the quality of life laws.

01:18:47.000 Who?

01:18:48.000 Giuliani.

01:18:49.000 Right?

01:18:50.000 Like people public and those were like petty offenses.

01:18:53.000 Right, so that's all helping this guy's argument.

01:18:57.000 This guy's argument.

01:18:58.000 Have they really worked?

01:18:59.000 Has it hindered or curved?

01:19:02.000 Time square during Giuliani's era was Disneyland.

01:19:05.000 Yeah, but there was still illicit drug activity.

01:19:07.000 Oh, come on.

01:19:09.000 It was paradise.

01:19:10.000 It was paradise.

01:19:12.000 Disney fight.

01:19:16.000 Good point, caller.

01:19:17.000 You may have got it.

01:19:18.000 Next call.

01:19:22.000 We haven't done the slow fade in a while.

01:19:25.000 What's the slow fade?

01:19:25.000 Is that really hurtful when they're talking to the?

01:19:31.000 This guy's Adam.

01:19:35.000 Hey.

01:19:37.000 Hey, what's up?

01:19:38.000 What's going on?

01:19:39.000 Caller.

01:19:39.000 In regards to Ryan's music, it's absolutely terrible.

01:19:45.000 Thank you.

01:19:45.000 Music is subjective.

01:19:47.000 No.

01:19:47.000 Who gets to decide what's funny?

01:19:51.000 Okay, play some more, Ryan.

01:19:53.000 I have plenty.

01:19:54.000 Hey, Caller, Ryan wants to dispute what you're saying with some more of his music.

01:19:59.000 So let's bust it on.

01:20:00.000 Okay, hit me with it.

01:20:02.000 Let's hit him with it.

01:20:03.000 Here I go.

01:20:03.000 Here we go.

01:20:04.000 And it's going to be so good.

01:20:06.000 It's going to be awesome.

01:20:07.000 It's going to slap.

01:20:08.000 It's going to slap.

01:20:09.000 You know, sure.

01:20:12.000 By the way, Ryan wants you to know he's a better guitarist than Jimi Hendrix.

01:20:16.000 Yeah, but these are synth songs.

01:20:19.000 Now, I haven't heard his guitar playing.

01:20:22.000 I could play some of my guitar playing from today if you'd like.

01:20:25.000 I mean, I don't know.

01:20:27.000 I would like.

01:20:28.000 Okay, so should we do that?

01:20:30.000 Sure, let's do both.

01:20:32.000 Let's do some of your awesome guitar playing about how you're better than Jimi Hendrix and then some of your fucking shitty.

01:20:39.000 I said to my son today, he's like, I went golfing and I fucking destroyed.

01:20:43.000 And I go, okay, well, he thinks that's going to make me mad because I'm a golfer.

01:20:48.000 And I go, good, good.

01:20:50.000 I'm glad you're good.

01:20:51.000 And I go, I want to set you up with a pro so you can unlearn bad habits.

01:20:54.000 He goes, I'm better than a pro.

01:20:56.000 And I go, dude, you sound like a retard.

01:21:00.000 And he goes, what do you mean?

01:21:03.000 I go, no, literally, you sound like a retard.

01:21:06.000 Like, I'm so good at golf.

01:21:08.000 I'm better than a professional.

01:21:11.000 I'm number one.

01:21:13.000 That's what you sound like, Ryan.

01:21:15.000 No, it's not.

01:21:16.000 You sound like my son.

01:21:17.000 If you have 10 minutes, not even five minutes, I can explain why, on a technical level, better than Jimi Hendrix.

01:21:23.000 I'm not saying that.

01:21:23.000 We don't need to have it explain.

01:21:25.000 Just play us.

01:21:26.000 Play that.

01:21:27.000 Some of your amazing fucking guitar licks.

01:21:31.000 Okay.

01:21:32.000 Now hold up.

01:21:33.000 Ready.

01:21:33.000 Jimi Hendrix, eat your heart out.

01:21:35.000 Here we go.

01:21:36.000 Now, this is just off the fly.

01:21:38.000 This is off the cuff.

01:21:40.000 You ever hear Hendrix off the cuff playing acoustic guitar?

01:21:43.000 It's garbage.

01:21:46.000 It's literally garbage.

01:21:47.000 Now, this is, I don't know what we're in here.

01:21:50.000 Let's just drop the needle.

01:21:52.000 You ever hear Scatman?

01:21:56.000 You know Scatman means shit man.

01:21:58.000 Yeah, that is true.

01:22:09.000 Oh my god.

01:22:11.000 He's literally playing a solo.

01:22:13.000 Dude, I'm the Scatman.

01:22:16.000 This is not dope.

01:22:18.000 This is not sarcasm.

01:22:21.000 He chose this.

01:22:22.000 He chose this.

01:22:23.000 I dropped the needle.

01:22:24.000 He chose.

01:22:26.000 No, I knew me doing a solo over I'm the Scat Man.

01:22:31.000 I dropped the needle.

01:22:32.000 I mean, I can't make this stuff up.

01:22:34.000 Somebody pitched in money.

01:22:36.000 They suggested the song and I played it.

01:22:42.000 I mean, like, you can't make fun of people anymore.

01:22:46.000 They hang themselves much more ferociously than you could ever think of.

01:22:53.000 Like, if I held a gun to Brian's head, I'd be like, I want him to play that solo to I'm the Scat Man.

01:23:00.000 Look at this fucking Puerto Rican piece of garbage.

01:23:05.000 Dude, you need to be in the Puerto Rican.

01:23:08.000 You're not meant to be in here, Brian.

01:23:10.000 You're meant to be in Jupiter.

01:23:15.000 This is Jupiter, Matu.

01:23:18.000 Not offended, Jupiter.

01:23:20.000 No, no, no.

01:23:20.000 Jupiter's not offended.

01:23:22.000 This is you.

01:23:32.000 Why does it look away when you do a particularly high note?

01:23:42.000 I'm off the top of the dome.

01:23:44.000 I do a solo to I'm the scatman.

01:23:46.000 That's right.

01:23:46.000 Now, who else does this?

01:23:48.000 Not Jimi Hendrix.

01:23:49.000 Because you're better than him.

01:23:50.000 I think he might be rolling over in his grave.

01:23:53.000 Well, Jimi Hendrix.

01:23:56.000 Here's the thing.

01:23:57.000 Hey, Jimmy, can you do a solo to I'm the scatman?

01:24:00.000 I'm the scatman.

01:24:01.000 Nah, man.

01:24:02.000 I don't do shit like that.

01:24:04.000 No, man.

01:24:05.000 Nah, man.

01:24:05.000 That's not what I'm about.

01:24:07.000 Now, his skill set, not great.

01:24:10.000 Period.

01:24:11.000 It's just not great.

01:24:13.000 Now, he rocks.

01:24:14.000 Now, you don't have to be great to rock.

01:24:16.000 You don't have to be the most skilled to rock.

01:24:18.000 But when it comes to command of your instrument, you have to have a certain amount of skills and knowledge.

01:24:23.000 Is that you right?

01:24:24.000 No, that's actually, this is Jimi Hendrix himself.

01:24:26.000 Oh.

01:24:27.000 Who I love.

01:24:34.000 Now, this feels like a very talented musician.

01:24:38.000 That's because it's through golden, rose-tinted glasses, rather.

01:24:42.000 No, no, dude.

01:24:44.000 I'm a racist, and I'm looking at a black man playing the guitar.

01:24:47.000 I'm loving it.

01:24:49.000 Now, if you look at Tommy Emmanuel.

01:24:52.000 Is that a 12-string he's playing?

01:24:53.000 Yeah.

01:24:59.000 No, I really do think.

01:25:00.000 Hey, can we just have one more kind of hurry?

01:25:02.000 No, we saw the film there.

01:25:03.000 Stop it for a second.

01:25:05.000 Because I was scared to death.

01:25:06.000 So then, can I just shoot one more time, though?

01:25:08.000 Can I just do it one more time?

01:25:11.000 You know what?

01:25:12.000 Isn't it amazing how blacks used to speak like Seattle back before the internet?

01:25:20.000 Even New York blacks, they weren't speaking like, hey, man, what the fuck?

01:25:27.000 Yeah, he's like, hello, what's going on?

01:25:29.000 I'm from Seattle.

01:25:32.000 I could be a guy where you buy trains at a train store where we set up all the various tracks.

01:25:38.000 Now they all sound like, I am the aunt angry.

01:25:44.000 Waiting for the train.

01:25:47.000 He's amazing talent.

01:25:48.000 That's for sure.

01:25:49.000 He's a natural.

01:25:50.000 He's no Ryan Katsu Rivera though.

01:25:51.000 Not when it comes to a smoke fest.

01:25:53.000 If we're doing a smoke fest.

01:25:55.000 Yeah.

01:25:56.000 Why is it that with your incredible talent, you've never had any song that went anywhere?

01:26:02.000 The thing is, Jimi Hendrix was very close to, that's why it's amazing when you listen to his story, you're like, wow, he could have just not made it.

01:26:10.000 He had to meet this guy and play at this place and that guy listened to that thing.

01:26:15.000 Nobody makes it.

01:26:16.000 The percentage of musicians, you don't get deals with talent.

01:26:20.000 25,000 subscribers following this show.

01:26:23.000 That's probably more than Jimi Hendrix for the first, I don't know, 20 years of his career.

01:26:28.000 Are any of them music industry Jews?

01:26:33.000 I don't know.

01:26:34.000 Didn't you do live guitar shit where you'd have like three people watching you?

01:26:41.000 Yes, so.

01:26:43.000 So you're...

01:26:45.000 But let's say, okay, if Jimi Hendrix was never famous, would he be a bum or would he be good?

01:26:50.000 Jimi Hendrix would probably I would wager that Jimi Hendrix would be Jimi Hendrix.

01:26:55.000 If you walk past him and he's playing on the subway, you'd be like, he's pretty good.

01:27:00.000 But you wouldn't be like, I saw Hendrix.

01:27:04.000 You know?

01:27:05.000 What about Bob Dylan?

01:27:06.000 A lot of people hate Bob Dylan.

01:27:08.000 This is an easy one to get people on board with.

01:27:09.000 Where are we going with this?

01:27:11.000 Like, the icons, the music icons.

01:27:12.000 Now, I happen to be torn on this.

01:27:14.000 Is it possible that you're retarded and you suck?

01:27:17.000 Have you considered that possibility?

01:27:18.000 Because all of the information to that.

01:27:22.000 I think a lot of musicians think that.

01:27:24.000 All of it's going to that.

01:27:25.000 You have a lot of other theories that, like, we would walk by Jimi Hendrix and not notice him.

01:27:31.000 But the general hypothesis is that Ryan sucks.

01:27:36.000 That's untrue.

01:27:37.000 This is coming from a guy who knows nothing of the guitar.

01:27:40.000 Knows nothing of the guitar.

01:27:41.000 What are you?

01:27:42.000 Knights of the fucking guitar table now?

01:27:44.000 Yes.

01:27:44.000 I'm a gatekeeper.

01:27:46.000 And I think a lot of...

01:27:48.000 Gatekeeper is what you are.

01:27:49.000 You're the gatekeeper of the fag zone.

01:27:51.000 They fall into the false call.

01:27:53.000 Worship.

01:27:53.000 I've had enough of this fucking retard and his ridiculous shit.

01:27:57.000 This guy's still online.

01:27:58.000 Terrible songs.

01:27:59.000 What'd you think of that, sir?

01:28:03.000 He died.

01:28:04.000 Oh, he's dead.

01:28:05.000 You killed him with your music.

01:28:08.000 All right, this person's talking about murder.

01:28:10.000 Speaking of which.

01:28:11.000 Murder, murder.

01:28:13.000 Hey, boys, how we doing?

01:28:15.000 Good, how you doing?

01:28:18.000 Hey, Gavin.

01:28:19.000 So I want to be crystal clear here and say that I am not super familiar with New York law, so don't take my word as a rule.

01:28:27.000 But from what I understand, you can own and possess a black powder revolver.

01:28:34.000 So because a black powder revolver is not considered a handgun, it's considered a firearm.

01:28:38.000 You should be able to own that in the office, fully loaded and hanging from your tactical walls, as well as something like a musket.

01:28:45.000 Basically, any black powder firearms.

01:28:49.000 Ex-cons tend to own them, ex-felons tend to own them because their laws are a lot less strict.

01:28:56.000 And so that might be something worth looking into.

01:28:58.000 I thought it'd be pretty cool to see you be able to shoot that on camera.

01:29:00.000 Okay, thanks a lot.

01:29:01.000 Thanks for calling.

01:29:03.000 There is footage of me shooting my black powder gun.

01:29:07.000 I put it on a motorcycle helmet because I had never shot it before.

01:29:11.000 And shit, that stuff shoots out a lot of flames.

01:29:17.000 A lot of flames.

01:29:18.000 And people always talk about how the founding fathers were not prepared for mass shootings because they have to stuff the fucking ball down.

01:29:28.000 Those dudes back in the Civil War, they could pound down a ball bearing and shoot it out within eight seconds.

01:29:38.000 They were good at powering out.

01:29:40.000 And they would have other guns ready at the same time.

01:29:44.000 So this notion that like the founding fathers never thought of like, pump, pow, pow, pump.

01:29:52.000 They had.

01:29:53.000 And we have.

01:29:54.000 But you know what's cool about Westchester and the surrounding suburbs is we're down to 37 inches, right?

01:30:01.000 27?

01:30:02.000 26.

01:30:03.000 26?

01:30:04.000 I'm totally okay with that.

01:30:06.000 I prefer 26 inches to a handgun.

01:30:13.000 You seem upset.

01:30:14.000 No.

01:30:16.000 In reference to the phone call, I believe a few years ago they changed the legal definition of a firearm.

01:30:22.000 It used to be anything that fired rim fire or center fire ammunition constituted a firearm, a modern day firearm.

01:30:33.000 And black powder and other stuff like that were excluded from that.

01:30:39.000 In New York State, I do believe they changed the law that said any projectile that is expelled from the firearm due by any means of ignition.

01:30:54.000 So that kind of labels the black powder in with it.

01:30:57.000 I'm not getting the verbiage and the language right, but they changed the legal definition in New York about what constitutes a firearm.

01:31:05.000 So can you have anything?

01:31:07.000 Me?

01:31:07.000 No.

01:31:09.000 Nothing.

01:31:09.000 What about those black pepper things?

01:31:13.000 Those yellow.

01:31:14.000 I've seen this yellow gun.

01:31:15.000 Hannity was pushing it.

01:31:16.000 It's $350.

01:31:19.000 They want it for your wife.

01:31:21.000 And it shoots these pepper balls that blind the guy.

01:31:25.000 Yeah.

01:31:26.000 They've changed it even to be like cover air guns and stuff like that.

01:31:30.000 So you can't have that?

01:31:31.000 No.

01:31:32.000 Fuck, dude.

01:31:34.000 Yeah.

01:31:35.000 That sucks.

01:31:36.000 New York's a tough state.

01:31:38.000 I'll talk about that here in a minute.

01:31:39.000 It did not come with it.

01:31:40.000 I just purchased it.

01:31:42.000 I'm going to get that for my wife.

01:31:44.000 For really no reason.

01:31:45.000 Because I don't think she can figure out my gun.

01:31:48.000 And I don't think my daughter can figure out a microcorg.

01:31:53.000 Colin wants to figure out.

01:31:56.000 Hey, if there's any people who know a microcorg, can you contact me and maybe you can FaceTime my daughter and we can figure this shit out?

01:32:06.000 And I hate that my wife's presents are homework assignments for me, but we're here now, so let's figure it out.

01:32:13.000 Some dad somebody requires on the air?

01:32:16.000 Yes.

01:32:17.000 You're on the thing that is the air.

01:32:20.000 Yeah, I mean, my dad listens to jazz.

01:32:25.000 You need to disown him.

01:32:28.000 Say, dad, I don't love you anymore.

01:32:30.000 I'm moving on.

01:32:32.000 I was in a car with him the other day, and he was playing jazz with the whole family in there.

01:32:36.000 And I looked at him and I went, I'm gay, yay.

01:32:40.000 Is he a Jew?

01:32:43.000 Say again.

01:32:44.000 Is he Jewish?

01:32:48.000 Deep down inside, probably.

01:32:50.000 He's got some kind of like a, I don't know.

01:32:52.000 Like, I don't get how people can, I get the concept of being, I love jazz, but like, literally putting the needle on the jazz record and being like, let's go, I don't get it.

01:33:04.000 It's just he's, you know, going on, he's going out, and so he's got to have a few fuck you's to the rest of the world, and I think that that's what it's but hey, can I share with you a funny observation that I made?

01:33:16.000 Okay.

01:33:17.000 Let's change the subject.

01:33:19.000 Do you know who the soccer player Wayne Rey is?

01:33:22.000 No.

01:33:24.000 No?

01:33:24.000 Oh, man.

01:33:25.000 Well, he's pretty damn good.

01:33:27.000 I don't expect you to know your soccer players, but like, he is the only soccer player.

01:33:33.000 All right, thanks for calling.

01:33:38.000 I've had enough of that.

01:33:41.000 Next call.

01:33:42.000 This man is named Adam.

01:33:45.000 Like the first man ever named.

01:33:49.000 Hello.

01:33:51.000 Hello.

01:33:52.000 What's up, Adam?

01:33:54.000 What's up, guys?

01:33:54.000 How y'all doing?

01:33:56.000 All right.

01:33:56.000 Good.

01:33:58.000 I know you've been talking a lot about guys working trades, and I'm one of them a couple months ago.

01:34:04.000 I had gone to college for a couple years, and I took a year off.

01:34:08.000 And then, obviously, being in a liberal arts school, I did not want to go back.

01:34:14.000 All right.

01:34:14.000 Thanks for calling.

01:34:17.000 Yeah.

01:34:18.000 Let's see the next call.

01:34:20.000 Dan, we are shuffling.

01:34:24.000 Next card of the pile is Scott moving out of Canada.

01:34:30.000 Yo, Gavin.

01:34:31.000 Yo.

01:34:33.000 Yo, so I'm living in Canada.

01:34:35.000 You know, it's turning into a bit of a shithole.

01:34:38.000 But me and my buddies have been talking about leaving the country.

01:34:42.000 Now, one of my friends has gone as far as actually Costa Rica.

01:34:47.000 Well, part of me with, you know, I got Scottish background, Scottish blood.

01:34:52.000 I feel like leaving Canada is like giving up.

01:34:55.000 It's like, you know, just throwing in the towel, just running away.

01:34:59.000 What do you think?

01:35:00.000 Should I leave this place, maybe move to USA or another country?

01:35:05.000 Or should I just in Toronto?

01:35:11.000 Yeah, I know what you're going through, dude.

01:35:12.000 I feel the same way.

01:35:15.000 Also, Costa Rica is so fucking hot.

01:35:17.000 Us Scottish people, we roast alive.

01:35:20.000 Like, I've been planning life on the lamb if I ever get really arrested.

01:35:25.000 And I was down there recently in Costa Rica, and I was like, I don't think I could lamb here.

01:35:33.000 It's so fucking hot.

01:35:37.000 That's what I was thinking.

01:35:38.000 I would have to lamb in Calgary or something.

01:35:41.000 Josh is having some issues down there, too.

01:35:43.000 It's hard to, there's no Amazon Prime, and there's no like Best Buys and shit.

01:35:47.000 So like getting tech stuff is tough.

01:35:50.000 No, Costa Rica's...

01:35:52.000 I had a place in Costa Rica for 10 years.

01:35:55.000 It's awesome.

01:35:56.000 It's a great place.

01:35:56.000 It's the best place in Central America, but it's also an inferno.

01:36:03.000 Dude, you're bringing up a great point.

01:36:05.000 Like, we got a lot of callers that are smarter than us tonight.

01:36:10.000 I don't know what to say.

01:36:13.000 I feel bad about leaving New York to go to South Carolina.

01:36:17.000 I feel like I'm pussying out.

01:36:19.000 I remember I talked to Tucker about this after they invaded his house, and he's like, fuck it.

01:36:24.000 I moved here when I was 12.

01:36:25.000 I've been here my entire adult life.

01:36:27.000 I'm not leaving.

01:36:28.000 And then a few years later, he was like, I don't want to be around these people.

01:36:32.000 I don't like these people.

01:36:35.000 So you have to balance this sort of like, am I capitulating?

01:36:42.000 Am I pussying out?

01:36:44.000 Like Michelle Malkin, she goes, I'm moving to Colorado.

01:36:48.000 You should come, Gavin.

01:36:49.000 It's way safer here.

01:36:50.000 They don't do that shit.

01:36:52.000 And I go, okay.

01:36:52.000 And then when the shit was really hitting the fan, she goes, she texts me.

01:36:56.000 She's like, I told you.

01:36:57.000 I told you.

01:36:59.000 And then she got the shit beaten out of her at some thing they were doing in Denver.

01:37:05.000 And I'm like, well, you didn't escape it, did you?

01:37:09.000 You're in the eye of the storm again.

01:37:12.000 So, who fucking knows?

01:37:18.000 I don't have the answers.

01:37:20.000 I'm determined to move to the South because I think we're in an American divorce.

01:37:26.000 Should we stay in fight?

01:37:27.000 Should we save New York?

01:37:29.000 Maybe.

01:37:30.000 Like, what do you think, Maddie?

01:37:32.000 Should we save fucking New York State?

01:37:34.000 The only thing that's keeping me in New York right now at the moment is my health care.

01:37:40.000 my cardiac team.

01:37:43.000 But you're waiting for a heart transplant.

01:37:45.000 Yeah.

01:37:46.000 The heart transplant list is way better in every other state.

01:37:50.000 Yeah, New York is like one of the worst states to live in for transplants.

01:37:55.000 To be a transplant recipient.

01:37:57.000 Because people just don't donate.

01:37:59.000 Okay.

01:38:00.000 So why New York State?

01:38:04.000 I've been struggling with this over the last like two years.

01:38:09.000 Because I liked Florida and I liked Virginia.

01:38:13.000 Didn't Virginia fucking get you arrested?

01:38:16.000 Yeah.

01:38:17.000 That was, you know, the feds, they're everywhere.

01:38:21.000 It don't make a difference what state.

01:38:23.000 But yeah, I would be, you know, in the Richmond area, southern Virginia.

01:38:30.000 I have family in Virginia.

01:38:32.000 I was looking at, I went to Cassandra Fairbanks, Tim Pool's Hood in West Virginia, and I liked it, but it was all just homes.

01:38:41.000 It was not, like, I like bars.

01:38:43.000 Yeah.

01:38:44.000 I like our local dive bar.

01:38:46.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:38:47.000 I don't like just, and I said to Cassandra, I go, so what's the local bar scene like?

01:38:52.000 And they go, no, people don't go to bars here.

01:38:54.000 They have bonfires at people's homes.

01:38:56.000 Which sounds great.

01:38:57.000 That does sound fun.

01:38:59.000 But you just need a place for random ranch coming.

01:39:04.000 The South, the thing about anywhere that's not New York is it doesn't feel like haunted with like the stories of older people and older generations it just feels like just land and that's kind of boring you know like even LA as shitty as it is like it's kind of addicting because it's got a story to it addicting addictive is that right yep addictive because it too people go to house parties the south is a paradise but you know it gets a little boring but the south is just as old as new

01:43:39.000 don't do football picks i don't even watch football patch ram saints thanks for calling yeah great call later there's one place you want to go for football picks it's get off my lawn that's right all right um that guy was on hold For like an hour.

01:44:01.000 That's true.

01:44:01.000 To ask what our favorite football team.

01:44:06.000 I played that this weekend.

01:44:08.000 This week.

01:44:11.000 What'd you play?

01:44:12.000 The ticket.

01:44:14.000 I picked three games on the team.

01:44:16.000 What team is Aaron Rodgers on now?

01:44:18.000 Aaron Rodgers is the Green Bay Packers.

01:44:21.000 He's still the Packers?

01:44:22.000 Yeah.

01:44:22.000 Oh, okay.

01:44:25.000 602 is on the line.

01:44:28.000 Hello.

01:44:30.000 Yellow.

01:44:32.000 602.

01:44:35.000 Thanks for calling.

01:44:36.000 Next.

01:44:37.000 I'll mute that person.

01:44:38.000 I'll give them time to wake up.

01:44:40.000 Alright, this person's talking about a new video drop.

01:44:46.000 I am beyond angry.

01:44:49.000 I am beyond angry.

01:44:52.000 I am beyond angry.

01:44:53.000 I sent you guys a letter.

01:44:56.000 I sent you angry.

01:44:58.000 I sent you a letter at the start of the show with a great video drop for when Ryan fucks up but doesn't want to admit it.

01:45:05.000 You guys check it out.

01:45:06.000 I think you'll like the whole clip, but it's perfect for Ryan.

01:45:09.000 Okay.

01:45:09.000 Let's see.

01:45:11.000 Okay, here we go.

01:45:13.000 This is Ryan fucking up.

01:45:14.000 And I believe the time code's...

01:45:16.000 How many seconds in?

01:45:18.000 Dan Marino.

01:45:20.000 1-6, 16-fucks.

01:45:21.000 Alright, gotcha.

01:45:23.000 We're watching it.

01:45:27.000 Flubbed on that last.

01:45:28.000 Did not flub at all.

01:45:28.000 No, it wasn't a flub.

01:45:30.000 It was no fucking flub.

01:45:32.000 It was not a flub.

01:45:34.000 No, come on.

01:45:35.000 Let's do it.

01:45:36.000 Fuck it.

01:45:42.000 Page 3, 25-second version.

01:45:45.000 Oh, dude.

01:45:46.000 That reminds me.

01:45:47.000 I was watching that Mets documentary.

01:45:50.000 It started in Queens, which is so good.

01:45:52.000 What is it on Netflix?

01:45:54.000 It was on ESP.

01:45:56.000 I hope we can still find it.

01:45:58.000 But I didn't know this, but for a minute, there was like the Super Bowl shuffle, right?

01:46:03.000 There was teams doing rap songs.

01:46:06.000 So the Mets go, we have to do a song, too.

01:46:12.000 Were the Metzizos?

01:46:16.000 So the Mets do a rap song that was the most embarrassing thing that has ever been created.

01:46:24.000 Never heard it.

01:46:25.000 Yeah, me neither before this documentary.

01:46:28.000 The Metzizos.

01:46:29.000 Like, it was Metz Tizos?

01:46:31.000 What was it?

01:46:32.000 The Metzmerized?

01:46:33.000 Yeah, that's it.

01:46:33.000 Get Metzmerized.

01:46:35.000 Check out this fucking song.

01:46:37.000 Oh, my Lord.

01:46:39.000 Get Mesmerized, get Mesmerized!

01:46:44.000 Get Mesmerized, Get Mesmerized!

01:46:48.000 Get Mesmerized, Get Mesmerized!

01:46:51.000 I agree with you!

01:46:53.000 Get mesmerized!

01:46:54.000 Get Mesmerized!

01:46:55.000 Let's do this right now.

01:46:57.000 Can I hear a witness?

01:46:58.000 George Fox.

01:46:59.000 I love this team.

01:47:00.000 Mr. Met the Rent Machine.

01:47:02.000 I lift the play, and that's my thing.

01:47:04.000 This year we're gonna win the series ring.

01:47:14.000 Strongman Darrell.

01:47:15.000 What's the name?

01:47:16.000 Rockman Daryl.

01:47:22.000 With your black bat.

01:47:24.000 Is there a video for this?

01:47:27.000 See if you can find a video.

01:47:28.000 Get mesmerized.

01:47:30.000 Get mesmerized.

01:47:32.000 I'm Daryl Strawberry.

01:47:33.000 I use a black bat.

01:47:36.000 Okay.

01:47:37.000 I sit on this bench because I got a toothache.

01:47:40.000 This is Let's Go Mets.

01:47:46.000 Have you ever seen this worst thing ever?

01:47:50.000 We are Notre Dame.

01:47:53.000 Yeah, that's the drink.

01:47:55.000 We are Notre Dame.

01:47:57.000 This is fucking bad.

01:48:04.000 I didn't hear it.

01:48:14.000 I just came up with a new thing.

01:48:16.000 Guys who play guitar and bass are dorks.

01:48:21.000 Like, look at that guy.

01:48:22.000 Look at Ryan.

01:48:23.000 I'm not the same.

01:48:26.000 We are not the same.

01:48:27.000 You gotta be kind of autistic to be good at that weird instrument.

01:48:31.000 I don't think I'm autistic.

01:48:33.000 I think that people who play instruments are dorks.

01:48:36.000 You're right.

01:48:42.000 But me and that guy are not the same.

01:48:44.000 Yes, you are.

01:48:44.000 No, we're not.

01:48:45.000 Look at these fights.

01:48:46.000 That's your world.

01:48:48.000 This is not the pipe of a dork.

01:48:50.000 I fight, I fuck, I do drugs.

01:48:52.000 Fight.

01:48:52.000 When'd you last fight?

01:48:53.000 When you knocked that guy for a week?

01:48:56.000 Yeah.

01:48:56.000 But I'm not a mirror guy.

01:48:58.000 I'm not afraid to fight otherwise.

01:48:59.000 I just don't pick fights.

01:49:00.000 I'm kind of stoic.

01:49:01.000 So I fight.

01:49:02.000 When are you last in a fight?

01:49:04.000 Well, not a long time, but I'm willing to fight.

01:49:06.000 That's right.

01:49:06.000 I do all the things a man should do.

01:49:09.000 One of Jessica White's favorite songs, Fight Fucking Fucking.

01:49:14.000 And make European songs.

01:49:16.000 All right, next call.

01:49:16.000 We're down to the last 10 minutes.

01:49:18.000 We are Notre Dame.

01:49:19.000 So they dropped two F-bombs in that Let's Go Mets thing, and they had to apologize?

01:49:25.000 Well, this was really cool about that Mets documentary is they have nails on it and he says fuck shit all the time.

01:49:34.000 And I thought, yeah, he was part of the story.

01:49:39.000 Thank you for including him.

01:49:40.000 What was that?

01:49:42.000 Wasn't there an ESPN thing where they cut out a guy who was offensive?

01:49:46.000 And the documentary already aired and they went back in time and cut him out.

01:49:53.000 What?

01:49:54.000 They cut him out?

01:49:55.000 Yeah, do you know what I'm talking about?

01:49:58.000 There was an ESPN documentary and the guy, I don't know, his fucking great-grandfather said nigger or something.

01:50:04.000 It had to be NASCAR.

01:50:07.000 Maybe.

01:50:08.000 I think it was a NASCAR.

01:50:09.000 And they removed him from the documentary.

01:50:12.000 Look that up, Brian.

01:50:14.000 So what was cool about this was they had Ron Darling, Keith Hernandez, they had all the Mets classics.

01:50:20.000 Those guys hate Nails because Nails was a dick.

01:50:24.000 Nails did say nigger all the time.

01:50:26.000 He was picking fights.

01:50:28.000 He was doing Coke.

01:50:29.000 He was shoving people.

01:50:32.000 And they don't like him.

01:50:34.000 But he was an integral part of the 80s Mets.

01:50:37.000 Was it Lenny Dykstra?

01:50:39.000 What?

01:50:40.000 The man they called nails.

01:50:42.000 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about, Ryan.

01:50:45.000 I'm saying they left him in the documentary, but there was another documentary recently where they removed a guy.

01:50:53.000 But do you remember the team?

01:50:55.000 No, just go ESPN.

01:50:57.000 How many times do I have to tell this guy?

01:50:58.000 I believe it's NASCAR.

01:51:00.000 Just go ESPN removed documentary.

01:51:04.000 That's all you need.

01:51:06.000 Gotcha.

01:51:08.000 And it's going to be some fucking dude who sinned.

01:51:12.000 And they rescinded.

01:51:16.000 Yeah, there it is.

01:51:17.000 Last dance?

01:51:18.000 No, what's that?

01:51:19.000 Rachel Nichols removed from ESPN programming.

01:51:26.000 What's going on now?

01:51:27.000 Oh, I remember.

01:51:28.000 Wait, this is recent, isn't it?

01:51:32.000 Oh, maybe that's not her.

01:51:37.000 Oh, there was audio on her cell phone.

01:51:40.000 No, that's not her.

01:51:42.000 There was someone else.

01:51:43.000 Anyway, it happened recently.

01:51:46.000 I forget the name of the guy.

01:51:47.000 You can look it up yourself because Ryan's inept.

01:51:50.000 But I thought it was cool to have a fucking train wreck like nails.

01:51:57.000 He's still a train wreck.

01:51:59.000 Like, we know Ryan is getting fired any day now.

01:52:02.000 But if there was a documentary at Censored TV, we'd have to include him because he was an integral part of the, I don't know, what are we at now?

01:52:12.000 2019 to 2021 years of Get Off My Lawn?

01:52:18.000 He's been in the news lately.

01:52:20.000 He's been a big part of this club.

01:52:24.000 All right, next call.

01:52:26.000 Okay, fucking Jason.

01:52:31.000 Hey, guys.

01:52:32.000 Hey, man.

01:52:33.000 What's happening?

01:52:34.000 Yeah, so, Gavin, you mentioned the Pendleton shirt earlier.

01:52:38.000 And I'm actually born and raised in the namesake of that brand.

01:52:43.000 And I've toured like their woollen mills and seen all their shit.

01:52:48.000 But right now in that town is probably the biggest rodeo in the nation going on right now.

01:52:55.000 It's called the Pendleton Roundup.

01:52:57.000 It's just a bunch of cowboys, bunch of Native Americans, and they're all just partying for like four days straight as this big rodeo is going on.

01:53:05.000 And it's just drunk every night, up all night, all sorts of drugs, alcohol.

01:53:10.000 It's pretty amazing.

01:53:11.000 It's in eastern Oregon.

01:53:12.000 It's a really ultra-conservative place, even though we got some crazy leftists here as well.

01:53:18.000 But you should see it.

01:53:19.000 I mean, there's Trump flags everywhere right now, American flags everywhere.

01:53:23.000 There was even a fuck Biden flag.

01:53:24.000 It was really awesome.

01:53:26.000 But yeah, I just wanted to call in and let you know that Pendleton, I mean, it's still going with the wall mills.

01:53:30.000 Still cool.

01:53:32.000 Okay, man.

01:53:32.000 Thanks for calling.

01:53:33.000 Good to know.

01:53:35.000 Good to know.

01:53:37.000 Local business?

01:53:38.000 Good to fucking know.

01:53:47.000 Edited out of sports documentary.

01:53:55.000 Okay, let's take another call.

01:54:00.000 Okay, we got Nikki.

01:54:04.000 Nikki, you're on the line.

01:54:09.000 What's up, Nick Dog?

01:54:11.000 Nick Dog.

01:54:12.000 Hey, we just wanted to say hey from the hometown, Westchester.

01:54:17.000 Oh, okay.

01:54:18.000 Nice.

01:54:20.000 Yeah, we don't really have any interesting questions.

01:54:23.000 Where in Westchester?

01:54:25.000 We're up in Briarcliffe.

01:54:27.000 Okay, not too far.

01:54:28.000 I don't know, Briarcliff.

01:54:30.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:54:30.000 It's going up like towards 98 Peakskill area, 100.

01:54:34.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:54:35.000 It's like by the way, like in the beginning of the pandemic, you were over at Rockefeller Preserve.

01:54:45.000 Is it MAGA up there?

01:54:47.000 No, but we actually just bought our first house today, which is very exciting.

01:54:53.000 And we're actually heading up to Duchess, and it's very, very red up there.

01:54:59.000 Well, congratulations on buying your first house.

01:55:02.000 Do you have kids?

01:55:04.000 We do.

01:55:05.000 We have a 12-year-old, a 4-year-old, and a 7-month-old who is screaming.

01:55:09.000 Oh, that's true.

01:55:10.000 That's fantastic.

01:55:12.000 Look at you.

01:55:13.000 Look at you starting your life.

01:55:15.000 It's fantastic.

01:55:16.000 And yeah, so we're in Westchester, and my husband also is very familiar with the Corg.

01:55:24.000 The what?

01:55:24.000 The Corgs?

01:55:25.000 Corg.

01:55:26.000 The Corg, the Mini Corg.

01:55:28.000 Oh, the Mini Corg.

01:55:30.000 Oh, the Corg.

01:55:32.000 Oh, really?

01:55:33.000 Yeah.

01:55:34.000 Okay, I'd love him to come by.

01:55:37.000 Yeah, well, we actually, we're super familiar with your area.

01:55:40.000 We know you're local.

01:55:41.000 I saw back when you posted your 50th.

01:55:44.000 I recognized it right away.

01:55:45.000 So I know exactly where your spot is, but we don't really know when you guys are there.

01:55:50.000 So we haven't come to meet up.

01:55:51.000 You know, we have kids.

01:55:53.000 Okay, well, let's communicate via the mailbag, and let's hang out at my local and also help my daughter with her stupid, fucking, complicated musical instrument.

01:56:09.000 Yeah, he's really good with all of that stuff.

01:56:12.000 But yeah, that would be fun.

01:56:13.000 I'll hit you guys up via the mailbag.

01:56:16.000 Yeah, it's pretty depressing around these parts for us red folks.

01:56:20.000 I feel kind of like your wife.

01:56:22.000 It's really sad for her.

01:56:23.000 Really sad for us.

01:56:25.000 Well, my wife just got red-pilled.

01:56:26.000 I mean, we were traveling all summer because our house was getting gutted and renovated.

01:56:34.000 And she was just around normal MAGA people.

01:56:38.000 And she was just like, I love these people.

01:56:41.000 They're so nice.

01:56:43.000 She should come to the bar when we meet up.

01:56:45.000 I watched her get slowly red-pilled.

01:56:48.000 Nice.

01:56:48.000 Because all her friends and all these fucking blue liberals stabbed her in the back.

01:56:54.000 And the red-pilled people, they didn't know even what her politics were.

01:56:58.000 In fact, I think they thought of her as a liberal vegan Hillary supporter.

01:57:02.000 And they were still like, hi, want some tomatoes?

01:57:05.000 Here's some brosciutto.

01:57:06.000 How you doing?

01:57:08.000 Nice.

01:57:09.000 Yeah, well, I'm kind of, you know, I've been born and raised in Westchester, so obviously you know the climate here.

01:57:15.000 So I'm very, you know, slowly but surely becoming an outcast amongst my group of friends.

01:57:22.000 It's so ridiculous, isn't it?

01:57:23.000 It's so lazy.

01:57:24.000 It is.

01:57:24.000 It's just lazy.

01:57:25.000 There is hope, you know.

01:57:26.000 Your kids are growing up here, too.

01:57:28.000 And listen, I was red-tailed eventually as well.

01:57:30.000 So there is hope.

01:57:33.000 Yeah, great call to end on.

01:57:35.000 Thanks for calling, by the way.

01:57:36.000 That was a great ender.

01:57:39.000 All right, folks.

01:57:40.000 Normal show tomorrow.

01:57:42.000 Thanks to Maddie Odell for tuning in.

01:57:44.000 Thanks to our sponsors, Nita Fashions, Droom, and of course, what was the other one?

01:57:53.000 Droom Tactical Walls and Nita Fashions.

01:57:55.000 And Tactical Walls, of course.

01:57:57.000 We really appreciate you supporting this show from day one.

01:58:01.000 We know you get blowback from supporting this show.

01:58:04.000 It's not a popular sentiment.

01:58:06.000 You were punished for supporting the show, for supporting free speech.

01:58:10.000 And our viewers and I appreciate it very much.

01:58:15.000 So in the interim, before we see you in, I don't know, like 20 hours, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

01:58:29.000 So if you're pretty, I'm sorry.

01:58:31.000 I got the key to eight motherfuckers.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - September 17, 2021

GOML LIVE #115 - RYAN SUCKS

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