Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #119

00:00:14.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McGinnis.

00:00:41.000 Many, many years ago, and never be a rules in red.

00:00:44.000 No one ever scared your bed, nothing ever filled your head except cry if you want.

00:00:54.000 That's the who.

00:00:56.000 It's hard put out when Pete Townsend was working on his gay album.

00:01:02.000 Rough boys.

00:01:03.000 Oh, I got the wrong glasses on.

00:01:04.000 Can you go get my cool glasses?

00:01:07.000 Where he goes, Rough Boys, out on the streets.

00:01:10.000 I'm gonna suck and taste you.

00:01:13.000 So he didn't have a lot of time for It's Hard.

00:01:16.000 It's weird that he's called, it's called It's Hard, too.

00:01:19.000 Ryan, can you get my lunettes?

00:01:21.000 I didn't know they were called Lunettes.

00:01:23.000 It's French.

00:01:24.000 They're on my desk in my glasses case.

00:01:27.000 I want it to match this wonderful t-shirt.

00:01:31.000 A lot of t-shirts coming out.

00:01:32.000 The Let's Go Brandon shirts are fucking spelled wrong.

00:01:36.000 I just realized, thanks to a baby monster, they, Let's has an apostrophe.

00:01:44.000 So the good news is this first run of shirts will be like those collector stamps where the plane is upside down and they're worth $3 million.

00:01:51.000 The first run of these t-shirts has a typo.

00:01:54.000 And that'll be amazing.

00:01:55.000 But yeah, It's Hard, terrible album.

00:01:57.000 I loved it because I was a little kid.

00:01:59.000 I was like 13 when it came out.

00:02:01.000 And back then, you just take whatever record you're lucky enough to get and you listen to it 700 times until it's the best album ever, whether it is or not.

00:02:10.000 Welcome to Maddie O'Dell.

00:02:11.000 What's up, everybody?

00:02:12.000 Back.

00:02:13.000 Heart is in working order.

00:02:15.000 Cheers.

00:02:16.000 The keg is not.

00:02:17.000 We're at the bottom of the keg.

00:02:18.000 We're getting a lot of fuzz.

00:02:21.000 This is the live episode.

00:02:23.000 It's free for the first half hour.

00:02:25.000 We go through the mailbag and then we take calls.

00:02:29.000 But we take calls behind the paywall to punish you for being so cheap that you will not pay for the show.

00:02:34.000 We want to thank one of our oldest sponsor, veteran-owned tactical wall.

00:02:40.000 Ryan, what the fuck is on your feet?

00:02:43.000 They're crocs.

00:02:44.000 They're boat shoes.

00:02:46.000 Why don't you show the camera the disgusting, fucking, stupid...

00:02:50.000 Dude, you're short.

00:02:52.000 And short people can't afford to wear big, fat, wide shoes.

00:02:57.000 Croc boat shoes?

00:03:02.000 Oh, boy.

00:03:02.000 I know you can bend them.

00:03:04.000 Yeah, I know you can bend them.

00:03:06.000 That's the problem.

00:03:08.000 What the fuck?

00:03:11.000 And then you have socks, little girly bobby socks, and you're wearing women's jeans.

00:03:15.000 What jeans are those?

00:03:16.000 Mom jeans.

00:03:18.000 I think Aeropastel?

00:03:19.000 Mom jeans, they're daughter jeans.

00:03:21.000 What are they called?

00:03:23.000 I think they're Aeropastel.

00:03:25.000 Or Hollister?

00:03:27.000 They stretch.

00:03:28.000 You're wearing a hot 19-year-old girl's pants.

00:03:33.000 You're wearing shoes.

00:03:34.000 I guess I could forgive if the guy was like a rich fisherman, but not really.

00:03:39.000 And then you have a decent shirt on that I gave you because I accidentally shrank it.

00:03:45.000 So you look like an idiot.

00:03:46.000 But yes, Tactical Walls, veteran-owned.

00:03:49.000 Hide your guns, hide your kids, hide your wife, says our copywriter, who I'm no longer reading from.

00:03:55.000 TacticalWalls.com, best products in America.

00:03:58.000 We were just talking about it, actually, about all the wonderful things we wish we could have if we were to have guns.

00:04:03.000 We use ours for baseball bats and machetes and other legal things here in the South Bronx.

00:04:09.000 But you people in free states can have, what are those guns up there, Maddie?

00:04:14.000 You got a couple of variations of the M4 or AR-15.

00:04:19.000 The one with the blocky stock just above your head is that's a SCAR-17 Heavy.

00:04:25.000 A SCAR-17 Heavy.

00:04:27.000 Yep.

00:04:28.000 It's beautiful.

00:04:29.000 Oh, yeah.

00:04:29.000 Does that go or do you have to go?

00:04:35.000 But as far as the bullets go, do you have to pull a trigger for every bullet?

00:04:38.000 It could be full auto.

00:04:39.000 Oh, really?

00:04:40.000 Yeah.

00:04:40.000 Wow.

00:04:42.000 I just saw it.

00:04:43.000 They're more likely semi-auto, but some people do have class three full-auto weapons.

00:04:49.000 Very expensive.

00:04:50.000 I just saw a cop got shot with a full auto handgun.

00:04:54.000 Wow.

00:04:58.000 Use the promo code Gavin for 20% off all orders.

00:05:02.000 That is tacticalwalls.com.

00:05:05.000 Promo code Gavin, 20% off.

00:05:07.000 We had Tim on the show before.

00:05:09.000 He's got, it's not, it's primarily a fantastic place to mount your guns, but it's also great for sports, to put your fire shit on, to put up your...

00:05:22.000 Oh, they also do great things for your cars.

00:05:24.000 Great places to hide guns.

00:05:25.000 Mirrors where you push a little thing and there's a gun behind the mirror.

00:05:29.000 A Kleenex box, shelves that hide things.

00:05:32.000 Clocks.

00:05:33.000 What?

00:05:33.000 There's a clock, too.

00:05:34.000 A clock you can hide your gun in.

00:05:36.000 Just fantastic places to hide your gun.

00:05:38.000 So you don't have to worry about people knowing what your arsenal is, unless, of course, they cross a line and you have to blow their head off.

00:05:44.000 A Glock clock.

00:05:47.000 The Glock clock.

00:05:48.000 Now, I made that up, but they can use that if they'd like to.

00:05:52.000 Tim, if you're listening, 1410 wall clock is not very catchy.

00:05:59.000 It should be called the Glock Clock.

00:06:01.000 That's right.

00:06:03.000 All right, let's start the show.

00:06:05.000 What should we talk about?

00:06:09.000 Bannon's possibly going to get arrested.

00:06:12.000 Says who?

00:06:14.000 They're going to vote on Tuesday, I think, to see if he's in contempt.

00:06:17.000 This is all about January 6th, because he didn't show up to a hearing about January 6th.

00:06:22.000 The ultimate nothing burger, the January 6th meandering.

00:06:26.000 I'm fascinated by all of the libs Who are still obsessed with January 6th?

00:06:33.000 I understand the day of, even a week after, going, ooh, it's so scary.

00:06:38.000 But after we've come through zero evidence, they're getting trespassing, they're still pushing it.

00:06:45.000 Like it's the fucking smoking gun.

00:06:47.000 Meanwhile, the only smoking gun was the gun that blew Ashley Babbitt away by some retard affirmative action hire who regularly left his gun in the bathroom.

00:06:56.000 What?

00:06:58.000 And wore a stupid pocket square with a matching tie.

00:07:01.000 This is good news, though.

00:07:02.000 A judge held two D.C. officials in contempt after they left a Capitol Riot suspect with a broken wrist for four months without surgery.

00:07:12.000 Like that couple on fucking Tucker who were old vet farmers that lost everything to defend themselves when they weren't even there.

00:07:20.000 Or that poor bitch in Alaska where the SWAT team shows up.

00:07:24.000 God knows how long it took them to get there.

00:07:26.000 She was not near an airport.

00:07:28.000 So they flew into, what's the big place in Alaska called?

00:07:33.000 Anchorage?

00:07:34.000 Anchorage.

00:07:35.000 They flew into Anchorage.

00:07:36.000 Then they had to take a fucking one-prop plane to some other butt-fuck town.

00:07:39.000 And then they had to drive for six hours to eventually get to her cabin in the middle of nowhere, kick her door down, and she's like, I wasn't even there, morons.

00:07:48.000 This is the worst FBI in history.

00:07:52.000 Is it the FBI?

00:07:52.000 I mean, I don't even know who's in control of the investigation.

00:07:55.000 Is it the Secret Service?

00:07:56.000 Is it the Capitol Police?

00:07:57.000 Is it the FBI?

00:07:58.000 It's not the Capitol Police.

00:08:00.000 It's the FBI, the CIA.

00:08:02.000 I don't know.

00:08:03.000 How much did they spend throwing you in jail?

00:08:07.000 Oh, my one case was $2 million.

00:08:09.000 $2 million to get Matty O off the streets.

00:08:12.000 Look, I hate him as much as everyone else does, but I'd probably pay $200 to get him off the streets.

00:08:20.000 And I think it's the FBI.

00:08:23.000 Oh, my God.

00:08:24.000 Taneshi Coates is on the show.

00:08:27.000 And I think I know why.

00:08:28.000 And I think I know why.

00:08:31.000 Taneshi, besides that catchphrase you keep doing with I think I know why what would you say the impetus is for the left being so fixated on January 6th I think that happened in July no it was January 6th it was a cold day yep you know what I noticed that guy had nothing when you were looking up when you were looking up his face yes that guy from the Raiders who got shit for saying that dude had big lips yeah

00:11:35.000 now our social media is destroyed yes every time i post on getter or something it's i think i know wahaha oh yeah i get it all on my socials everything did you see these brand new shirts though we're working on it's just called t-shirts ryan it arrived at 702 p.m i think i want to make these just a little circle above the left hit classy one oh we should do them fluorescent orange do you know what i'm talking about high

00:13:07.000 coffee blend brazilian roast blend all on sale plus free shipping on all orders when you go to www.beardvet.com that's not enough when you use promo code gavin you get an additional 15 off check out beardvet and tell them Gavin sent you.

00:13:27.000 Sean, the owner of BeardVet, is one of us.

00:13:28.000 He's a good egg, and we like him more than a friend.

00:13:30.000 Like most of our sponsors, Beard Vet is clearly a veteran-owned company.

00:13:35.000 We support them and they support us.

00:13:37.000 That's beardvet.com.

00:13:40.000 Promo code Gavin for 50% off.

00:13:42.000 All orders and Christmas giveaways.

00:13:47.000 Look at that stuff.

00:13:48.000 You know, it's funny that vets seem to be the only ones working in America these days because they have the discipline from the Army.

00:13:55.000 And when they're told they don't have to go to work, and they're told they can get a stimulus check, and they're told they could probably stay home, they go, I'd rather not, thanks.

00:14:02.000 I'd rather just bust my ass and make something because that's what I do.

00:14:06.000 I have discipline.

00:14:07.000 The rest of us just go, nah, I'm going to sit on my fucking ass and let America rot.

00:14:15.000 I was at a pharmacy today to get a toothbrush and some toothpaste, and it was empty.

00:14:19.000 Go to my Getter account.

00:14:22.000 There was nothing on the shelves.

00:14:23.000 Yeah, that's true.

00:14:25.000 After making fun of Venezuela forever, our shelves are starting to look similar.

00:14:29.000 Then I went to Dick's, which is a male strip club in my area, because I just, I'm not gay, but I wanted to just blow a black guy just to let some steam off.

00:14:39.000 Is that the store where they sell you?

00:14:45.000 Sporting goods.

00:14:46.000 The Dicks, no.

00:14:49.000 Dicks called They Want Their U Back.

00:14:52.000 That's pretty good.

00:14:52.000 They're all sold out of you.

00:14:55.000 Now, maybe Dicks is like moving inventory or something and I'm missing something.

00:14:59.000 No.

00:14:59.000 So that's the drugstore in the South Bronx.

00:15:01.000 Look at that shit.

00:15:02.000 That's so, doesn't that have a Cuban vibe?

00:15:05.000 Yeah, it has a bodega.

00:15:07.000 We have so much tooth.

00:15:08.000 How much?

00:15:09.000 What do you mean there's not enough?

00:15:11.000 There's like seven different toothbrush.

00:15:13.000 How many teeth you got?

00:15:14.000 Yeah, you can get a toothbrush.

00:15:16.000 This is America.

00:15:17.000 We want 300 different toothbrushes.

00:15:20.000 I heard some foreigner comedian going, you people here in America, you have an aisle for cereal.

00:15:27.000 A whole aisle.

00:15:29.000 And I'm like, yeah, bitch.

00:15:31.000 We got a fucking aisle of cereal, motherfucker.

00:15:35.000 Candy, cereal, Cheerios.

00:15:37.000 Jesus Christ.

00:15:38.000 Look at that.

00:15:38.000 We got two baskets of stupid balls nobody wants.

00:15:41.000 Some shorts.

00:15:43.000 And that's it.

00:15:45.000 Some boxes that aren't unpacked.

00:15:46.000 That's the other problem is you can't get anyone to come help.

00:15:49.000 No.

00:15:51.000 I was looking for a driver at Dick's.

00:15:53.000 I wanted to get to the Tiger Woods one.

00:15:55.000 It's called like the X Rev 5 or some shit.

00:15:59.000 And he goes, well, we have the X Max.

00:16:01.000 And I go, okay, what's the difference?

00:16:02.000 It's a little stiffer than the Tiger Woods one you're looking for.

00:16:05.000 Oh, okay.

00:16:06.000 And he goes, hold on, I'll check in the back to see if we have any.

00:16:08.000 This is the kind of worker that's left.

00:16:10.000 Just an old drunk who wasn't there for his kids and he got arrested with a DUI and he showed up there in a daze.

00:16:17.000 He's probably still drunk from the night before.

00:16:19.000 He's gone in the back room for 12 minutes, probably sucking on the Mickey that's in his top drawer.

00:16:23.000 And he comes back and he goes, nope.

00:16:25.000 And I go, what about this one?

00:16:26.000 He goes, that's a display.

00:16:28.000 And I go, what about the 13 that are next to it?

00:16:31.000 He had missed an entire display that was in the fucking back.

00:16:36.000 And I go, he's an old dude.

00:16:38.000 I go, what's the matter with you, Bill?

00:16:39.000 It has his name on there.

00:16:42.000 And he goes, well, I didn't see it there.

00:16:43.000 And I'm like, you walked directly by a massive display that exclusively displays the drivers that I'm looking for.

00:16:54.000 And you poo-poo this discovery like it doesn't exist.

00:16:57.000 Not that he doesn't walk around his store all day.

00:17:02.000 I don't need you.

00:17:03.000 No.

00:17:04.000 Leave.

00:17:05.000 Let me go back there.

00:17:06.000 You're supposed to be better than nothing, dude.

00:17:09.000 You're not better than nothing.

00:17:11.000 Yo, this guy sounds like a piece of garbage piece of freaking crap.

00:17:15.000 Mike Rappaport.

00:17:16.000 Oh my God, Michael Rappaport.

00:17:18.000 Yeah, this dude sounds like a piece of dirt crap, dude.

00:17:21.000 What are you a freaking dick, dude?

00:17:23.000 Get the hell out of here with your freaking motherfreaking shit.

00:17:27.000 Mike, I don't want to...

00:17:28.000 I'm so glad that we got you on the show.

00:17:30.000 We don't usually get major guests like this, but I couldn't help but notice you moved to LA when you were 18, which was probably like 40, 40 years ago.

00:17:41.000 What's with the New York accent?

00:17:43.000 Dude, you know why I was born in New York, bro?

00:17:47.000 Dude, I got freaking rap in my name, bro.

00:17:51.000 Dude, I knew so many.

00:17:52.000 How many rappers you know, dude?

00:17:54.000 You mother freaking, get the freak out of here.

00:17:57.000 I think you would say fuck.

00:17:59.000 Yeah, trying to.

00:18:00.000 The Beastie Boys, I guess, are your friends, and that makes you eternally New York-y.

00:18:04.000 Dude, New York Jews is like, dude, who do you think bagels is from?

00:18:11.000 I feel like if you moved to Scotland when you were 18, and you were whatever you are now, 55, you'd have a Scottish accent.

00:18:18.000 Like, it's so phony.

00:18:20.000 You're like Coco Diaz and all these other phony New Yorkers who go to LA and play up their wise guy shit.

00:18:26.000 What the fuck?

00:18:26.000 To be fair, ACDC, yeah, they moved to freaking, what'd you call it?

00:18:32.000 Australia?

00:18:32.000 Yeah, Australia.

00:18:33.000 I sound like a bunch of Australian freaking dude, like a dingo.

00:18:36.000 Jesus.

00:18:38.000 It's clean rappapore.

00:18:41.000 I like that.

00:18:42.000 You know what I've seen here?

00:18:43.000 What?

00:18:43.000 I went to the Halloween store today, and look at this, what they got here.

00:18:48.000 It's not a real spider, Brian.

00:18:49.000 You're not scared.

00:18:51.000 But it jumps up at you, right?

00:18:53.000 So, look at that.

00:18:55.000 Your IQ is perfect for those kind of things.

00:18:57.000 Dude, it scares you.

00:18:58.000 Oh, a spider.

00:18:59.000 This is in the Bronx, so it scares everybody who walks in.

00:19:03.000 Oh, yeah.

00:19:04.000 My wife is like, don't, no, don't do that.

00:19:06.000 I'm like, no, I have to do this.

00:19:08.000 So there's just a bunch of...

00:19:11.000 There's one.

00:19:12.000 White people are probably the least scared.

00:19:15.000 They get past it.

00:19:16.000 Okay.

00:19:17.000 I think this is a good one.

00:19:18.000 Am I racist for assuming that Puerto Ricans and blacks are going to be the worst?

00:19:22.000 Puerto Ricans are going to be the most scared, and blacks are going to break the windows with fear.

00:19:26.000 There was this black dude that like he...

00:19:30.000 Oh, this is him.

00:19:30.000 Yeah, this is the best one.

00:19:32.000 And you were right.

00:19:32.000 Your theory prevails.

00:19:34.000 There's no idea.

00:19:35.000 Yo.

00:19:36.000 The spider's resetting.

00:19:37.000 Yo, is that a real spider?

00:19:38.000 Yo.

00:19:40.000 He gets his kids in first.

00:19:42.000 Well, they lived.

00:19:44.000 Oh, no, he's got his baby.

00:19:46.000 No.

00:19:52.000 Did he make sure his entire family got in first?

00:19:55.000 Yeah.

00:19:55.000 To see if they die from the spider bites.

00:19:59.000 They all knew he was there too.

00:19:59.000 They were all looking.

00:20:01.000 Yeah, he sacrificed chemicals.

00:20:03.000 Wow, so you're a real roving reporter.

00:20:05.000 Yes, I was out in the house.

00:20:06.000 And on the street.

00:20:08.000 Look at you.

00:20:08.000 Go.

00:20:09.000 And I got a skeleton for us.

00:20:11.000 Let's see.

00:20:12.000 Wow, you really know how to spend money.

00:20:14.000 Oh, he's hidden.

00:20:18.000 This is Ryan on his day off.

00:20:21.000 He films Scared Puerto Ricans and buys, goes to a Halloween store and buys what?

00:20:26.000 A $2 skeleton?

00:20:28.000 Did you buy anything else?

00:20:29.000 $3.

00:20:31.000 I didn't buy anything else.

00:20:32.000 This was the only good thing there.

00:20:33.000 Did your wife?

00:20:35.000 No, she didn't freaking buy.

00:20:36.000 Dude, she's a freaking adult.

00:20:38.000 So you guys made the trek all the way to the fucking Halloween store.

00:20:43.000 You filmed people, you wandered around, and then you came back with a $2 skeleton.

00:20:49.000 Well, dude, it was a freaking afterthought.

00:20:53.000 $3.

00:20:54.000 We were there for White Castle.

00:20:56.000 Okay.

00:20:57.000 Jesus.

00:20:58.000 That's what we craved.

00:20:59.000 So did you see the?

00:20:59.000 All right.

00:21:00.000 I don't know if you...

00:21:01.000 This is the least exciting one.

00:21:02.000 They get better and better.

00:21:04.000 We already showed this, dude.

00:21:05.000 Not this one.

00:21:06.000 This is the show, Matt and the Blonde.

00:21:08.000 Very popular.

00:21:10.000 Hey, Matt, what are your thoughts on the bird, which is the bald eagle?

00:21:14.000 What about it?

00:21:16.000 Is it cool?

00:21:17.000 I don't know.

00:21:18.000 It's pretty majestic.

00:21:20.000 I'm sure you have a lot of bald eagles in your neck of the woods.

00:21:22.000 I see a lot.

00:21:23.000 So, many.

00:21:24.000 And they are predatory species.

00:21:26.000 Remember when everybody thought that they were in danger?

00:21:28.000 They were in danger.

00:21:30.000 Wow, they really got into it.

00:21:32.000 Yeah, there's two.

00:21:34.000 So that one's not so exciting.

00:21:36.000 This one's very exciting.

00:21:37.000 I'm saving the best for last, and you're going to flip, I believe.

00:21:40.000 This one's really good.

00:21:42.000 Last thing, let's not forget our national bird, the bird, which is the bald eagle.

00:21:48.000 So thank you, Owen.

00:21:49.000 I appreciate you.

00:21:50.000 All right.

00:21:50.000 Thank you for the call.

00:21:54.000 He has no idea.

00:21:55.000 You really save the best of the end.

00:21:56.000 We have some new friends in the studio.

00:21:59.000 We should probably explain to them what the bird, which is the bald eagle, is.

00:22:03.000 It's worth updating people regularly, especially if there's some sort of alien invasion or these shows are archived and they're discovered 7,000 years later.

00:22:12.000 Hey, aliens.

00:22:14.000 There was a ridiculous drug-dealing loser who got in an altercation with police and died.

00:22:19.000 It was an irrelevant detail in our history, but for some reason, half the country decided that this loser was a saint and he was murdered by the police and it was indicative of a pattern.

00:22:31.000 So they burnt down the entire country, the best country in the world, America, and there were statues for him.

00:22:38.000 He was Jesus Christ.

00:22:39.000 He became Jesus Christ overnight.

00:22:42.000 And he has children everywhere.

00:22:44.000 His family is just a retarded sprawl.

00:22:47.000 But his brother, who is literally named Filonius, which you may want to look up on an Earth dictionary, it's not a compliment.

00:22:55.000 He was told by his lawyer to get up and say, look, man, we have endangered species.

00:23:01.000 We have the bald eagle on the endangered species list.

00:23:04.000 Yet we don't have the black man.

00:23:06.000 Why is the bald eagle considered an endangered species and the black man is not?

00:23:13.000 His lawyer and him went through it 700 times.

00:23:16.000 He hits the mic and he goes, the bird which is the bald eagle.

00:23:21.000 Take the bird which is the bald eagle.

00:23:25.000 And when he fucks it up, you can see it break his lawyer's heart.

00:23:28.000 Yeah, he just looks over him like.

00:23:30.000 That's not what we rehearsed.

00:23:32.000 Oh, fuck.

00:23:33.000 Look at Malcolm X behind him, too.

00:23:35.000 Red.

00:23:36.000 Remember, Malcolm X was called Red?

00:23:38.000 Redbone.

00:23:39.000 He's literally Redbone.

00:23:41.000 Hi, Yellow.

00:23:42.000 I should have changed my name to Gavin X after Vice.

00:23:45.000 That is pretty dope.

00:23:45.000 This one, you could...

00:23:47.000 I dropped it to myself so that way it's better quality.

00:23:49.000 You could see Schroyer's face.

00:23:51.000 Which is the bald eagle.

00:23:53.000 So thank you, Owen.

00:23:54.000 I appreciate you.

00:23:56.000 All right.

00:23:56.000 Thank you for the call.

00:23:58.000 I don't like when people's beards are more important than their mustache.

00:24:01.000 Interesting.

00:24:02.000 Now, this is the grand finale.

00:24:03.000 He's got to either trim his beard or get a new mustache.

00:24:06.000 This is my, I'm obsessed with this person.

00:24:08.000 It's Gigi Gorgeous here.

00:24:09.000 I have a very unique and special request from your friend, Jake.

00:24:14.000 He wanted me to tell you that you are like the bird, which is the bald eagle.

00:24:20.000 I have no idea what that means, but he said that your advice and examples of how to be a better person help him.

00:24:27.000 And I just wanted to let you know that I love you.

00:24:30.000 And yeah, I hope this message serves you well.

00:24:33.000 Stay gorgeous.

00:24:34.000 Hey, Gigi, you want to be a better person?

00:24:36.000 Don't break your father's heart by being you.

00:24:40.000 The broken heart, which is my father's.

00:24:43.000 Yeah.

00:24:43.000 She and her husband went to a gynecologist and talked about the fact that they're having trouble having a baby.

00:24:52.000 The gynecologist looked at Gigi Gorgeous' genitalia, noticed it was a penis, and said, I'm not sure what, this wasn't exactly my training.

00:25:02.000 That hurt Gigi Gorgeous quite a bit.

00:25:04.000 Then the gynecologist found out that the other person in the relationship, who looks a lot like a woman, has a cunt because she is.

00:25:14.000 And the gynecologist dared to think outside the box and said, what about you take your penis, madam, and put it in your husband's vagina?

00:25:24.000 Sir.

00:25:26.000 I don't know if you know this, but you're in a heterosexual relationship.

00:25:30.000 You're basically a glam rocker in the band Skid Row, and your husband is a tomboy who had her tits removed, by the way, at Gigi's behest.

00:25:41.000 Speaking of tomboy, last submission from my Ryan-censored TV account, you're TikTok famous yet again.

00:25:50.000 Women do earn less in America because they choose to.

00:25:55.000 They would rather go to their daughter's piano recital than stay all night at work working on a proposal.

00:26:02.000 So they end up earning less.

00:26:04.000 They're less ambitious.

00:26:05.000 And I think this is sort of God's way.

00:26:07.000 This is nature's way of saying women should be at home with the kids.

00:26:10.000 They're happier there.

00:26:11.000 These women are happier at home.

00:26:14.000 Sit down.

00:26:16.000 Women?

00:26:19.000 Wait a minute.

00:26:20.000 Wait a minute.

00:26:22.000 The way those memes things are supposed to go is, you're ugly.

00:26:25.000 You're a loser.

00:26:26.000 No one wants to fuck you.

00:26:28.000 And it's a nerdy looking girl.

00:26:29.000 And then she goes, like, hold up.

00:26:31.000 And then she spent like two hours in the mirror and she has her hair did.

00:26:37.000 And she's like, oh, really?

00:26:38.000 Who's ugly now, bitch?

00:26:39.000 Yeah.

00:26:40.000 This woman takes me saying very true things about women, which I'm totally proud of.

00:26:46.000 Thank you.

00:26:46.000 Like, there's nothing worse than people repeating shit that you didn't mean and taking it out of context and going, this guy thinks blacks need to go back to Africa.

00:26:53.000 And you're running around trying to put up fires.

00:26:55.000 Go, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:26:56.000 But that's exactly what I said in the perfect context.

00:27:00.000 Yes, nailed it.

00:27:01.000 I couldn't be happier.

00:27:03.000 I don't even like, I don't even regret one syllable of that rant.

00:27:07.000 But your slam dunk is to change your shirt from a short sleeve shirt to a long sleeve shirt and put some dumb shit on your head.

00:27:17.000 That's like a, it's not even a real band.

00:27:20.000 It's like a filter or something.

00:27:21.000 Oh, really?

00:27:22.000 Yeah.

00:27:23.000 So what's the impact here?

00:27:25.000 I don't understand what changed from the pre this to that.

00:27:29.000 And then she does this dumb, or he does this dumb punch.

00:27:32.000 Is that a guy?

00:27:33.000 Yeah.

00:27:35.000 Wait, what?

00:27:36.000 Yeah?

00:27:38.000 I mean.

00:27:39.000 Well, wait a minute.

00:27:39.000 I shouldn't say that.

00:27:40.000 I assumed because she said...

00:27:42.000 That's when she talks.

00:27:44.000 We're getting to charge and cleanse all your shit.

00:27:46.000 Oh, yeah.

00:27:47.000 Wishing there was some sort of automatic way that they would be all cleansed and charged.

00:27:51.000 Oh, look no more.

00:27:52.000 Try magical direct deposit.

00:27:54.000 Look no further.

00:27:55.000 I'm not joking.

00:27:55.000 This is an actual method that I use, and I'm going to share it with you all.

00:27:58.000 Think of it like having direct deposit into your bank account onto your debit card.

00:28:02.000 That's a chick.

00:28:03.000 Yeah, it is a chick.

00:28:04.000 So wait, go back to the video.

00:28:06.000 What's her beef?

00:28:08.000 You're saying that the...

00:28:08.000 Oh, I get it.

00:28:09.000 She identifies as a man.

00:28:12.000 So the cis dudes...

00:28:13.000 I got scared.

00:28:14.000 I got confused by the word cis.

00:28:15.000 The cis dudes say, why do you care?

00:28:18.000 You're a man now.

00:28:20.000 Which is a good point.

00:28:24.000 Why does it matter?

00:28:25.000 She's like, you're like two.

00:28:26.000 Oh, and then she goes bang into a chick?

00:28:29.000 I don't even understand these fucking young people.

00:28:31.000 Yeah.

00:28:34.000 Like, at least when we were annoying, our fathers understood the annoying shit we were saying.

00:28:41.000 I was saying shit to my dad, like, you don't understand the working man.

00:28:45.000 Communism is the only way the working man can be empowered, dad.

00:28:49.000 He'd go, fuck you.

00:28:50.000 You've had one fucking job in your life, you stupid cunt.

00:28:53.000 I'd watch out, dude.

00:28:54.000 That's a valid argument.

00:28:55.000 Her off of her med, she turns into an anime character that kills people riding a motorcycle with red eyes.

00:29:00.000 I'm not scared of Japanese villains.

00:29:03.000 When I was in Japan, I kept seeing the Yakuza and I just felt like slapping them.

00:29:07.000 Their punch perms and dogs.

00:29:09.000 Yeah, with their little suits on.

00:29:10.000 They look like Prince's manager.

00:29:12.000 What are you going to do?

00:29:14.000 I mean, I hear they chop off someone's finger.

00:29:16.000 Yeah, probably voluntarily as part of some initiation thing.

00:29:20.000 Initiation.

00:29:21.000 Hey, difficult initiation.

00:29:22.000 All right, we're past the half hour mark.

00:29:24.000 Last one, Bubba and Hanks.

00:29:26.000 Bad news.

00:29:27.000 Our buddy Bubba is sick.

00:29:30.000 And it's not looking great for our friend.

00:29:33.000 But we stand by him and people have survived much more dire consequences.

00:29:38.000 So let's not give up hope on our cancer-laden friend, Bubba.

00:29:44.000 Bubba and Hanks, though, are still working, still up and running.

00:29:49.000 So let's support Bubba by buying Bubba and Hanks quality beef.

00:29:53.000 Maddie, you had a whole shipment, right?

00:29:55.000 What'd you have there?

00:29:56.000 I've had pretty much, I mean...

00:29:58.000 The Wagyu beef, the hamburgers?

00:30:01.000 Yeah, the burgers.

00:30:02.000 I mean, I've had just about every cut that they've sent.

00:30:06.000 And hands down, great.

00:30:09.000 Fantastic.

00:30:10.000 Unbelievable.

00:30:11.000 Now, how did you cook the Wagyu beef?

00:30:13.000 It's got a lot of marble in it, right?

00:30:14.000 It's got a lot of...

00:30:15.000 I grilled it on a grill.

00:30:18.000 Did you add any flavoring?

00:30:20.000 Just salt and pepper.

00:30:22.000 Interesting.

00:30:23.000 Because the flavor is in the fat inside the meat.

00:30:27.000 That's where you get the...

00:30:30.000 So you don't want to hamper that by adding...

00:30:35.000 Got to come up to room temp, a little salt and pepper.

00:30:38.000 On both sides.

00:30:40.000 Go to BubbaandHanks.com.

00:30:43.000 Use my promo code Gavin.

00:30:44.000 That's a terrible picture, by the way.

00:30:47.000 That's a much better one.

00:30:48.000 Marrow butter.

00:30:49.000 Use my promo code Gavin and you'll get an extra 15% off.

00:30:52.000 Stick in there, Bub.

00:30:53.000 Stay strong.

00:30:54.000 Let's show our love and support.

00:30:55.000 A vet who supports us.

00:30:56.000 Have you noticed?

00:30:57.000 100% of our sponsors are vets today.

00:31:00.000 What does that tell you?

00:31:02.000 I think it tells you that vets are the only ones that are not scared of being canceled.

00:31:08.000 Besides those who experience black privilege, like Dave Chappelle, who's special, as we discussed yesterday on Anthony's show, fucking stinks.

00:31:19.000 It's a black nanette.

00:31:22.000 All he does is complain.

00:31:23.000 What a dork.

00:31:24.000 Fuck him.

00:31:25.000 There's a pun I could use, but I will not do that.

00:31:29.000 You still get your money's worth just by saying it exists.

00:31:31.000 That's correct.

00:31:33.000 All right.

00:31:34.000 Shall we go behind the paywall?

00:31:37.000 So we're going to continue reading letters for half an hour.

00:31:39.000 Then we're going to fucking take some calls.

00:31:45.000 The doodles are back.

00:31:47.000 Yeah.

00:31:49.000 I'm not sure how to advertise that.

00:31:52.000 But we'll put it up on our site.

00:31:54.000 But I'll explain all this after the what should we call it?

00:31:59.000 An intermission?

00:32:00.000 A denouement.

00:32:02.000 So we're about to go behind the paywall.

00:32:04.000 Are you trying to go piss?

00:32:05.000 Yeah, brother.

00:32:06.000 Just go through there and go straight.

00:32:07.000 All right, I'm doing it.

00:32:10.000 Until we meet again, which is tomorrow.

00:32:13.000 For your cheapies, I guess it's next week.

00:32:15.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

00:33:18.000 So, how should we do this, Ryan?

00:33:20.000 Because there's two problems.

00:33:22.000 It's hard to advertise auctions because banks freak out when they see it on your website and they shut you down.

00:33:34.000 So, we will get it up on the site anyway.

00:33:38.000 But it's always got a weird URL.

00:33:42.000 You know what I mean?

00:33:43.000 Yeah.

00:33:43.000 So, no longer justiceforliberty.com.

00:33:46.000 Oh, that's long gone.

00:33:49.000 But it's Charity Auctions Today.

00:33:52.000 Here, I'm sending it to you now.

00:33:56.000 Oh, wait, that's a text you want to fucking email, right, dog?

00:34:09.000 Yeah, how do you look for it?

00:34:13.000 Good point.

00:34:15.000 So you could go to charity auctions today.com and then do a search.

00:34:24.000 Let's see.

00:34:27.000 What is the name of the...

00:34:28.000 Let's see.

00:34:29.000 If we go to home.

00:34:30.000 Home?

00:34:33.000 And then...

00:34:34.000 Okay.

00:34:34.000 Oh, that's the home.

00:34:35.000 Oh, fuck it.

00:34:36.000 We'll figure it out.

00:34:37.000 We could leave the in the description of the episode for now.

00:34:40.000 Sure, we'll do that.

00:34:41.000 We'll do that.

00:34:41.000 Copy that.

00:34:42.000 So look at the view items, though.

00:34:44.000 We've got some real variety here for sale.

00:34:47.000 That's all black ink that I've done during various shows, right?

00:34:51.000 Some of these drawings are a little crude, but fun to have nonetheless.

00:34:57.000 And then there is, keep, just go through them fast.

00:35:02.000 Oh, yeah, you have the shittiest internet that you've got to get fixed.

00:35:04.000 And remember last time I said, can you look into that?

00:35:06.000 I bet you haven't done anything to.

00:35:07.000 Look how quick that one happened.

00:35:09.000 I bet you haven't done anything to figure out why your internet was so slow.

00:35:13.000 Right?

00:35:14.000 That's true.

00:35:16.000 I've been keeping less tabs open that seems to work.

00:35:19.000 I mean, this is pretty snappy.

00:35:20.000 Yeah, no, your theories always suck about that.

00:35:23.000 No, it's slow because my phone's on.

00:35:26.000 Wait, that one doesn't have an image.

00:35:29.000 Yeah, it's probably your shitty computer.

00:35:31.000 But there's some fun stuff here.

00:35:33.000 Oh, fuck.

00:35:35.000 Go keep going.

00:35:36.000 Or maybe show all items.

00:35:40.000 I'm getting annoyed.

00:35:43.000 Oh, you're shit.

00:35:44.000 Go down.

00:35:47.000 So that's more salt.

00:35:48.000 And then there's some colored ink for sale.

00:35:50.000 But look at this.

00:35:52.000 Fatherless daughter.

00:35:54.000 Fatherless son.

00:35:56.000 Look at that one.

00:35:57.000 Those are deep.

00:35:57.000 Those are watercolors I did on canvas board.

00:36:01.000 Pretty heavy, huh?

00:36:03.000 Are they heavy?

00:36:05.000 So you will get a canvas board.

00:36:07.000 Yeah, it's pretty.

00:36:08.000 It's substantial.

00:36:09.000 And then the rest of them are by John from prison.

00:36:12.000 He's been spending his commissary on art supplies.

00:36:18.000 That one's a weird kind of painting he did.

00:36:21.000 A lot of colored pencil stuff.

00:36:22.000 That's, I think, the only painting.

00:36:25.000 But I would say, even if you hate proud boys and you're in Antifa, wouldn't you want this?

00:36:32.000 This was done by a proud boy who was in prison for fighting Antifa.

00:36:36.000 Like, a huge part of art is the story behind it.

00:36:40.000 Oh, what's that?

00:36:41.000 Oh, that's Napoleon's, not Napoleon Dynamite, but the French soldier.

00:36:46.000 That's his handkerchief.

00:36:48.000 Oh, now that's an interesting handkerchief.

00:36:50.000 Like, the context makes all of these much more interesting than they are.

00:36:55.000 I mean, than you would normally think, I should say.

00:36:59.000 Anyway, so he's very excited that these are back up.

00:37:01.000 He can start making money for his family again.

00:37:03.000 100% of the proceeds go to the Max and John fund, which is split between Max and John Kinsman's family.

00:37:13.000 His wife has been working around the clock.

00:37:17.000 She's running the whole family.

00:37:18.000 She's not on welfare.

00:37:20.000 She's a black single mom who homeschools her kids.

00:37:24.000 John sends them all kinds of coloring books and math assignments and all kinds of shit.

00:37:29.000 So he's teaching his kids from prison, from Bear, what's it called?

00:37:37.000 Bear Hill.

00:37:40.000 That's the only one we don't know.

00:37:41.000 Who did that baby, that fag zone drawing?

00:37:44.000 But anyway, he's raising his kids from prison.

00:37:47.000 She's busting her ass.

00:37:48.000 Can we help these people financially, please?

00:37:51.000 They were ripped off.

00:37:52.000 They had their father stolen, not so much by Antifa, but by Judge Mark Dwyer, the Soros appointed Cyrus Vance, the DA, whose father, by the way, I just learned, was the Iranian ambassador during Jimmy Carter.

00:38:10.000 Cyrus Vance's father is responsible for that debacle in Iran.

00:38:16.000 And then Soros funds him to become the DA.

00:38:18.000 And it's all fucking social justice warrior bullshit.

00:38:21.000 The judge, the DA, Steinglass, the other DA, the prosecutor, I should say, sorry, who was trying to impress Cyrus.

00:38:30.000 Total fucking mess.

00:38:31.000 And then the three judges.

00:38:33.000 Three judges, three of the four judges for the appeal were black women.

00:38:37.000 They represent 7% of the population.

00:38:39.000 They represented 75% of Max and John's appeal.

00:38:43.000 It's brutally corrupt, this clown world we're living in.

00:38:47.000 So all we can do is try to raise money for the family.

00:38:50.000 So they have something when they get out of jail, which should be in a year at best, a year and a half at worst.

00:38:59.000 Not two years.

00:39:02.000 Okay, so we'll put that link at the end of the show.

00:39:05.000 Let's read a couple more letters.

00:39:06.000 Oh, we found out who this is.

00:39:08.000 This is from Ryan.

00:39:10.000 Another man named Ryan.

00:39:12.000 I don't know if his Ryan B., we'll say for now.

00:39:15.000 Okay.

00:39:15.000 And it's a great little piece.

00:39:18.000 By the way, did we discuss that I'm on the Facebook dangerous list?

00:39:21.000 We did not discuss that.

00:39:22.000 That's also on my getter.

00:39:24.000 Facebook, they accidentally leaked all the people they see as a threat to America.

00:39:29.000 Proud Boys are prominent.

00:39:31.000 They're apparently a German club.

00:39:34.000 It says that they're global, but mostly in Germany.

00:39:37.000 Whatever.

00:39:39.000 And then I'm on it.

00:39:42.000 And I noticed the page I was on includes David Duke.

00:39:48.000 So there's Proud Boys.

00:39:50.000 You see they're in Germany.

00:39:52.000 David Duke, Ian Stewart, the dead singer of the white power band Screwdriver, who unfortunately are pretty catchy.

00:40:03.000 Enrique Tario, Faith Goldie.

00:40:05.000 Fred Phelps is just three names above me.

00:40:08.000 Two names above me.

00:40:12.000 The man who says God hates fags, which is like so on the nose that it's kind of dubious, isn't it?

00:40:23.000 Where was that published?

00:40:25.000 The Intercept, I believe, were the first ones to publish it.

00:40:28.000 But it's hundreds and hundreds of pages.

00:40:34.000 And I made the cuts.

00:40:39.000 Here's a guy named Chad.

00:40:41.000 Ryan's lag problem.

00:40:42.000 Is it possible that the lagging is the FBI tapping your feed?

00:40:48.000 Nope, because one computer does go fast.

00:40:50.000 Maybe they didn't tap that one yet.

00:40:53.000 Watch these white news anchors absolutely amazed when they see a black guy able to stay on a skateboard while it moves one mile an hour.

00:41:00.000 They've never seen anything like it.

00:41:03.000 Skating news anchor.

00:41:05.000 Isn't it funny the whole thing pushing women as skateboarders?

00:41:09.000 They all suck.

00:41:11.000 I think there's a whole HBO show devoted to it.

00:41:14.000 My pal Leslie Arfin produced with pride.

00:41:17.000 But you'll see them in commercials too.

00:41:18.000 It's always like a commercial for fucking...

00:41:21.000 Look at this.

00:41:22.000 Whoa.

00:41:24.000 And so Mr. Premium is going to be out here every single Monday and Wednesday skateboarding with everyone and trying his best to basically show them exactly what to do.

00:41:36.000 As far as Chandler Skate Park, they'll be done in about the next 10 days or so.

00:41:40.000 That's what we see.

00:41:41.000 This is what they see.

00:41:46.000 Everybody at home's like a drummer.

00:41:48.000 That's good, folks.

00:41:51.000 I wasn't kidding with you.

00:41:52.000 Victor, how many years have you been skating yourself?

00:41:54.000 Oh, yeah.

00:41:56.000 Long time.

00:41:56.000 It's been about, I don't know, since I was eight years old.

00:41:59.000 All right, Charles.

00:42:00.000 Well, you suck if it's been since you were eight years old.

00:42:02.000 You couldn't do a rail slide?

00:42:03.000 I know that's cool, but that's a whole new level.

00:42:06.000 Really good stuff, Victor.

00:42:07.000 Great skating.

00:42:08.000 Good boy, Victor.

00:42:09.000 Good boy.

00:42:10.000 A lucky bird.

00:42:15.000 Ryan's internet.

00:42:16.000 It's also slow and disconnects when he does live streams on both Insta and YouTube from his home.

00:42:22.000 Sounds like this guy's a retard, this Ryan Katsu Rivera.

00:42:26.000 They said that to me.

00:42:27.000 I'm adding the retard.

00:42:29.000 Okay, I knew it.

00:42:30.000 But they say your shit also sucks from your house.

00:42:33.000 Ah.

00:42:34.000 What do you think of that?

00:42:36.000 Hurtful.

00:42:37.000 I don't like it.

00:42:38.000 One of the seven people?

00:42:39.000 Is it accurate?

00:42:40.000 Seven is a good number.

00:42:42.000 One of the seven people.

00:42:43.000 The Lord's number.

00:42:43.000 Watch his live.

00:42:44.000 That's correct.

00:42:47.000 So where are you in these menu?

00:42:49.000 You're like deep in?

00:42:50.000 These are from yesterday?

00:42:53.000 I didn't think I was.

00:42:56.000 I'll just search them.

00:42:58.000 9.34 p.m., Ryan.

00:43:01.000 Okay.

00:43:02.000 If they're talking about your internet, it's pretty darn recent.

00:43:08.000 Isn't it ironic that we're talking about Ryan's internet speed and how he thinks it's not his problem and we think it is, and he can't even find the fucking emails that are saying that because he's so incompetent.

00:43:24.000 I don't want to show my emails, but.

00:43:26.000 New listener here.

00:43:27.000 This is called Fuck Yeah.

00:43:28.000 This is from 943.

00:43:30.000 It is 943 right now.

00:43:33.000 My boyfriend and future father of my child recently changed my views and opinions on topics in which I did not previously acknowledge.

00:43:40.000 This is a woman who already sent this email, but sees that we're checking emails now, and she re-sent the email.

00:43:46.000 Kylie, we're on to you, you fucking bitch.

00:43:51.000 I like to believe I'm a very open-minded person and you are my high-heeled Ryan Bashing, blah, blah, blah.

00:43:55.000 I can't begin to explain how refreshing it is to watch the two of you speak freely and honestly with a who, with a don't give a fuck what you think attitude.

00:44:03.000 Thanks for all the shit you do, do.

00:44:04.000 Okay.

00:44:05.000 On a side note, I came across this website after watching the trail end of a show on some basic TV channel here in Michigan.

00:44:11.000 I briefly checked out the website to see exactly what this organization had to say.

00:44:15.000 See for yourself the audacity of their statements, such as when someone with the authority of a teacher describes the word and you are not in it, there is a moment of psychic disequilibrium, as if you looked into a mirror and saw nothing.

00:44:33.000 The fuck?

00:44:34.000 I'm so sick of this shit.

00:44:36.000 You need to see it to be it.

00:44:38.000 I watched a movie and I saw no one like me.

00:44:41.000 My wife's a ho-chunk Slovak.

00:44:45.000 No one is like her in the world except her brother.

00:44:48.000 She doesn't bitch about how I don't see any Ho-Chunk Slovaks anywhere.

00:44:53.000 Like, what about a fucking albino with a birthmark on his neck?

00:44:57.000 I was watching James Bond.

00:44:59.000 There's never been an albino James Bond.

00:45:02.000 I can't relate.

00:45:04.000 What about all the white nerds who moved to China?

00:45:06.000 They don't see themselves in anything.

00:45:08.000 I can't begin to explain how agitating the website is, especially by trying to bullshit the mental health slash medical professionals.

00:45:18.000 P.S. Ryan, get your shit together when you're fucking with your fandangled face swap application.

00:45:23.000 I'm tired of seeing you look yellow-faced or white-faced like a ghost.

00:45:28.000 Nice impressions, though.

00:45:30.000 So what is this website she's talking about?

00:45:32.000 Genderspectrum.org?

00:45:33.000 Correct.

00:45:34.000 Let's see some of it.

00:45:35.000 Gender spectrum.

00:45:37.000 Is everyone as exhausted by this bullshit as I am?

00:45:41.000 Yeah.

00:45:42.000 By the way, no one in that little video gif is remotely trans.

00:45:51.000 I'm in.

00:45:52.000 Wait, I just want to see their videos.

00:45:58.000 Can't we see some videos?

00:46:00.000 We gotta log in and...

00:46:02.000 Yeah, I want to see your stupid bullshit lame stories.

00:46:08.000 Let's see the Asian kid.

00:46:11.000 I read a cat story.

00:46:12.000 I didn't see myself in it.

00:46:13.000 Inaugural video, Kickstarter, send-off thing, whatever you want to call it, for Gender Spectrum's new video series about trans teens talking to their parents.

00:46:23.000 My name is Kat.

00:46:24.000 I'm an 18-year-old trans guy from Louisville, Kentucky, currently studying in Chicago, Illinois.

00:46:31.000 Is that a guy?

00:46:34.000 And he's just trans because it doesn't mean anything anymore?

00:46:37.000 Or is it a chick who's taking testosterone?

00:46:39.000 It's hard to tell with Asians.

00:46:40.000 It's a cat.

00:46:41.000 You know what I want to know?

00:46:42.000 Hey, God, if you're watching, can you send us an email and tell us how many straight guys have pretended to be gay and even sucked dicks to try to blend into this whole new cool thing where queer is awesome and straight men suck?

00:46:59.000 Like, how many of our young men are sitting there going, or even, oh, shit, wow, alrighty.

00:47:08.000 Okay, that's a live one.

00:47:10.000 Oh, boy, you're not even close to done.

00:47:12.000 Is that all the way?

00:47:13.000 That's just a tip.

00:47:14.000 Wow.

00:47:15.000 That is a lot more than I thought it was going to be.

00:47:17.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:47:18.000 Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

00:47:20.000 How many of those are out there?

00:47:23.000 And I think that's a guy.

00:47:26.000 Because if there's a lot, then those guys are being raped.

00:47:32.000 Our media, our bullshit invented trans thing is raping our young men.

00:47:38.000 That's pretty bad, isn't it?

00:47:45.000 You should know a couple things about me.

00:47:47.000 So this is an extraordinary thing.

00:47:49.000 So a couple quick facts about me.

00:47:50.000 I'm adopted.

00:47:51.000 I'm studying in Chicago for film.

00:47:54.000 I'm a year and eight months on testosterone, one year, seven months.

00:47:58.000 No, it's a woman.

00:47:59.000 It has been two years and nine months since I came out to my mom, which is what I wanted to talk to you about today.

00:48:04.000 That's what we're here for.

00:48:05.000 We're talking about coming out.

00:48:07.000 I'm here to talk to you about how this is anti-lesbian.

00:48:09.000 Maybe this can help you come out.

00:48:11.000 I'm not a lesbian.

00:48:12.000 I'm a dude.

00:48:14.000 This is what they do in the Middle East.

00:48:16.000 They make fucking lesbians become men.

00:48:21.000 And they make fags chop their dick off.

00:48:22.000 This is going to be talking to the parents.

00:48:24.000 I want to cut the skin off my forearm and make a face.

00:48:28.000 Make a burrito.

00:48:31.000 Oh, guys.

00:48:32.000 Check this out.

00:48:34.000 You're not going to fucking believe this.

00:48:37.000 Can you people stop resending your fucking shit?

00:48:39.000 I saw SH, I saw your thing on the butane bullet.

00:48:45.000 We got a letter from God while we were talking.

00:48:49.000 Our dreams came true.

00:48:51.000 He says 72 men have done that.

00:48:54.000 83 of you include by guys.

00:48:58.000 Hmm.

00:48:58.000 I thought it would be more than that.

00:49:04.000 By the way, we've got a lot of people complaining about the app.

00:49:07.000 Yes, we're on it.

00:49:08.000 We're redesigning an update that's going to fix all these problems.

00:49:11.000 You all have the same problem.

00:49:13.000 We obviously are familiar with it.

00:49:16.000 Sup, Gavin and Gayboy.

00:49:18.000 I have a date Saturday.

00:49:19.000 Any advice as to what to talk about?

00:49:23.000 Well, I would just try to keep the date moving, Neil.

00:49:27.000 And if you have no interesting stories, I cannot recommend lying enough.

00:49:34.000 If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.

00:49:37.000 As my dad always said, bullshit beats brains, my boy.

00:49:40.000 Now, we're not talking about saying you're a Marine and you fought in Afghanistan and the 3rd Battalion and some bullshit you fucking Googled.

00:49:50.000 You went to Hollywood, the training camp, and not the other.

00:49:54.000 What's the other training camp?

00:49:56.000 Harris Island.

00:49:57.000 By the way, San Diego.

00:49:59.000 No stolen valor shit.

00:50:01.000 Just stuff like, I saw a fucking homeless man this morning on a rascal.

00:50:07.000 He had no pants on.

00:50:09.000 I used to use this one all the time.

00:50:11.000 It always did great.

00:50:12.000 He had an American flag on, and he was like, fuck you.

00:50:15.000 He kept yelling, fuck you, at people as he whipped by.

00:50:18.000 And he was going, I didn't know those things could go so fast.

00:50:20.000 I think it was going 40 miles an hour.

00:50:22.000 Like it was whipping, faster than a bicycle could go.

00:50:26.000 And eventually this woman was saying, slow down, slow down.

00:50:29.000 And he said, fuck you, slow down.

00:50:31.000 And he rammed at her and he sent her careening into a pile of garbage, which I think saved her life.

00:50:38.000 And he kept going.

00:50:39.000 The flag broke off, which I thought was ironic.

00:50:42.000 And then here's another thing you do.

00:50:44.000 When you're talking to chicks and you're on a date, try to extrapolate general truths.

00:50:50.000 Like, are we giving these people too much airtime, too many rascals?

00:50:55.000 Shouldn't they be in loony bins?

00:50:57.000 Is the solution to all of this homelessness and shit and drug addiction?

00:51:03.000 More mental institutions, like the one we used to have upstate, they used to call the human repair shop.

00:51:10.000 Maybe that's the solution.

00:51:12.000 Is it inevitable?

00:51:12.000 You're going to see people whipping by on rascals in New York City?

00:51:16.000 What do you think, honey?

00:51:18.000 Like, it becomes a little Rubik's Cube you have to solve.

00:51:22.000 And if she's like, I don't know, just dump her.

00:51:25.000 Homeboys get that life.

00:51:26.000 Say, this date's boring.

00:51:28.000 I'm out of here.

00:51:28.000 Just get up and leave.

00:51:30.000 Here's another thing that happened to me.

00:51:32.000 Before social media was so big, when I first moved to New York in the late 90s, I was going back and forth with this woman who was a publicist for the band that, you know, she wanted us to write about advice.

00:51:45.000 And for whatever reason, you didn't used to say, send me a picture.

00:51:49.000 I guess because that was rare and people didn't really take pictures of each other in the late 90s.

00:51:53.000 And there was MySpace, not really Facebook.

00:51:56.000 Anyway, I can't remember why I didn't ask for a picture.

00:51:59.000 But I just assumed that She knew who I was, and she'd be pretty decent.

00:52:02.000 And she worked with bands.

00:52:03.000 She'd be kind of cool.

00:52:05.000 So I was like, Well, I'm going to be done work soon.

00:52:07.000 Why don't we go talk about it?

00:52:10.000 And she said, Okay, we'll meet here.

00:52:13.000 I met her at this bar in the East Village, and she looked like a breathtakingly gorgeous supermodel 90-year-old.

00:52:25.000 90-year-old.

00:52:26.000 90-year-old.

00:52:29.000 She was probably 38.

00:52:31.000 Hideous.

00:52:33.000 Laugh lines that you could hide a gun in.

00:52:36.000 Fucking crow's feet like her eyes had both intercepted grenades.

00:52:42.000 Hideous.

00:52:44.000 Did you fuck her?

00:52:45.000 Fuck no.

00:52:47.000 I was 20.

00:52:50.000 I was 29.

00:52:51.000 I would fuck her now and say, like, you got a lot of nerve showing up to meet me, you two.

00:52:58.000 The band, you two.

00:53:00.000 As I fuck the Edge and Bono and the blonde guy.

00:53:04.000 Larry on drums.

00:53:05.000 Larry something.

00:53:06.000 Larry something on drums.

00:53:08.000 And then the band.

00:53:08.000 Hey, Larry something on drums.

00:53:11.000 I'm sorry.

00:53:13.000 That'd be funny.

00:53:13.000 Bonus started forgetting their names.

00:53:15.000 And I gotta say, thank you, Larry Something on drums.

00:53:19.000 Top of the Marnant to you.

00:53:21.000 You're fucking amazing.

00:53:22.000 You're doing just fucking.

00:53:23.000 What is it, Larry?

00:53:25.000 What?

00:53:27.000 And so I had to get out of the date.

00:53:30.000 So what I did was, you can add this music to the story.

00:53:34.000 So I can't say, oh my God, you're fucking hideous.

00:53:36.000 You're obviously 38, but you look like you're 100.

00:53:39.000 I'm not remotely interested in fucking you.

00:53:41.000 I'm actually insulted that you agreed to this date because you've seen me.

00:53:44.000 I'm famous.

00:53:45.000 So what the?

00:53:46.000 Are you out of your mind?

00:53:49.000 Fuck you, you bitch.

00:53:50.000 It's like one time I was driving my bicycle through the West Village and some guy was like, hello.

00:53:56.000 And I look back and it's some hideous, bald, seven-year-old fag.

00:54:00.000 And I wanted to circle around my bike and go, you think you could get me?

00:54:04.000 Like, that's insulting.

00:54:07.000 Anyway, aren't you embarrassed?

00:54:09.000 This is back in the Next Tel flip phone days.

00:54:15.000 So you couldn't really, if it was on vibrate, you couldn't really tell if you're getting a call.

00:54:20.000 I mean, the other person couldn't tell.

00:54:22.000 So I was like, yes?

00:54:23.000 Oh, my God.

00:54:24.000 That's great.

00:54:24.000 So how long have you been working with these bands?

00:54:26.000 Oh, they sound exciting.

00:54:28.000 Sorry, hold on.

00:54:30.000 Oh, for fuck's sake.

00:54:31.000 It's my roommate.

00:54:32.000 I didn't have a roommate at the time.

00:54:34.000 Hello?

00:54:36.000 Yeah.

00:54:39.000 Yeah.

00:54:42.000 Yeah, that's not my problem, dude.

00:54:45.000 You need to have your keys handled.

00:54:49.000 No, I'm not going to come back and let you in.

00:54:52.000 Are you out of your fucking mind?

00:54:54.000 Go to your fucking girlfriend's house.

00:54:56.000 Yeah.

00:54:57.000 I don't care about meetings.

00:54:59.000 No, no, no.

00:55:00.000 You locked yourself up.

00:55:01.000 It's your...

00:55:01.000 Sorry.

00:55:03.000 It's your problem.

00:55:05.000 And then over the course of the fake date, which was now going to only go 10 minutes, I kept getting calls from this non-existent person and saying, dude, I don't have time.

00:55:15.000 Look, I don't fucking.

00:55:17.000 And then he eventually breaks me down.

00:55:20.000 And I have to go leave to let him in, but I'll be right back.

00:55:24.000 And let me get your number so I can find you.

00:55:28.000 And maybe my apartment is like, we're in the East Village, so maybe it's on like Chelsea, like 23rd.

00:55:36.000 It's going to be...

00:55:38.000 It's going to be a little while before I can get back.

00:55:41.000 I got to get up there, get the train, might get a taxi.

00:55:44.000 What are you going to do?

00:55:45.000 Who knows?

00:55:46.000 I never spoke to her again.

00:55:48.000 So anyway, the reason I bring that up is that's also date advice if she's fucking hideous or lame.

00:55:54.000 But it is a woman.

00:55:55.000 It does look like she was beaten with an ugly stick.

00:56:04.000 The key is talking, laughing, fucking.

00:56:08.000 Keep it going, champ.

00:56:12.000 It's not a joke.

00:56:14.000 That's an inside joke with my wife and I. We were watching some Spelling Bee documentary, and there's an Indian dad and his son, and he's like, pharmaceutical, and his son is like, P-H-A-R-M-E-C-U-T-I-C-A.

00:56:25.000 And he's like, okay, keep it going, champ.

00:56:28.000 So every time I hear keep it going, I have to say, champ.

00:56:31.000 Keep it going, champ.

00:56:32.000 My buddy, you got to do this, man.

00:56:35.000 You got to get it going, dude.

00:56:39.000 Oh, my gosh.

00:56:41.000 You really got to get it rocking.

00:56:43.000 And I were jumping all over.

00:56:45.000 I want to be a woman.

00:56:49.000 One time we were walking, me and my kids were walking back from their school, and it was like a two-mile walk in Brooklyn.

00:56:54.000 And all the cab drivers are pachoderms.

00:56:58.000 And this, every time, everyone I pulled over, I'd go, are you an off-duty buddy?

00:57:03.000 Are you going, are you still rocking?

00:57:05.000 Are you an off-duty buddy?

00:57:07.000 And not one of them said, what's with the accent, asshole?

00:57:10.000 Every single one went, oh, I'm an off-duty buddy.

00:57:14.000 Every single, out of like seven.

00:57:16.000 And it was one of my best memories of my kids is we just kept getting the off-duty buddy from every single guy.

00:57:22.000 I suppose that's racist?

00:57:24.000 Nowadays, yes.

00:57:25.000 Back then, we understand.

00:57:27.000 Hey, Gav and his mistress.

00:57:29.000 Oh, God, I hope this is one of the few episodes my mistress watches.

00:57:33.000 I was just thinking, these fucking liberals and Dems love having power, telling people what to do, and being in control.

00:57:41.000 True.

00:57:42.000 And if you notice, we don't really like that.

00:57:46.000 We're more just like, you know what, like you have your guns, and if someone comes, shoot them and stuff, I don't want to get involved.

00:57:54.000 Well, what should I do with this?

00:57:56.000 I don't know.

00:57:56.000 You handle it.

00:57:58.000 You want to get the vaccine?

00:57:59.000 Get the vaccine.

00:58:00.000 Well, I'm trans.

00:58:02.000 All right, you go be trans.

00:58:03.000 Don't get involved with my kids and start changing bathrooms.

00:58:07.000 But if you want to prance around your living room and address, by all means, go bananas.

00:58:12.000 We don't want to get involved.

00:58:13.000 They want to get involved.

00:58:13.000 It's like I've always said about politics.

00:58:15.000 It's two groups.

00:58:16.000 People want to be left alone and people who won't leave them the fuck alone.

00:58:22.000 Where are the people who want to be left alone?

00:58:24.000 Exactly.

00:58:28.000 It's amazing to me that they don't push having Kids more.

00:58:31.000 What more power do you have over another person than being their parent?

00:58:35.000 I have complete control over my children, and if I were evil enough, I could even influence or persuade their politics, gender, etc.

00:58:43.000 That's a good point.

00:58:44.000 And when they do have kids, you see them with the whole, this is my trans son, and this is my fucking multi-gender daughter.

00:58:52.000 Kids don't have that option.

00:58:53.000 We're raising our children to be gender-free.

00:58:57.000 Well, it's like a handicap.

00:58:58.000 Now they're victimized.

00:59:00.000 They could be completely, what you would call privileged, but then they have a handicap kid.

00:59:06.000 They're like, well, we have a kid who's trans.

00:59:08.000 That protects them as a shield.

00:59:12.000 Protects them.

00:59:12.000 It's a shield.

00:59:13.000 It's a protection.

00:59:14.000 It's a shield.

00:59:15.000 I'm of two minds about this, though, because I would love to see these idiots stop breeding and continue their ideology for more generations, but I also want them to breed and enjoy the most happiness that life has to offer.

00:59:24.000 Yeah, I know what you're saying, dude.

00:59:27.000 But I also just think, fuck you.

00:59:29.000 Don't have kids.

00:59:31.000 Fuck it.

00:59:32.000 I'm of one mind now.

00:59:33.000 This is him talking.

00:59:34.000 Let's hope these fuckers don't realize ever.

00:59:37.000 And in a decade or two, we can outbreed this stupidity.

00:59:40.000 It seems like a better solution.

00:59:41.000 Thanks.

00:59:42.000 Ryan from Connecticut.

00:59:45.000 All right.

00:59:47.000 Yeah, I think one of the reasons that they don't have kids is because they're not really sincere about their totalitarianism.

00:59:53.000 They just like saying that.

00:59:56.000 Like if we said, okay, you get the South Bronx.

01:00:00.000 Here's the energy department.

01:00:02.000 Here's education.

01:00:04.000 Who should we hire?

01:00:05.000 You know that after like an hour, they go, I don't know, this is hard.

01:00:10.000 Can't you figure it out?

01:00:11.000 I just liked bitching about everyone ruining shit.

01:00:14.000 I don't actually want to handle it.

01:00:17.000 It's like a Mets fan bitching about the new management.

01:00:21.000 They don't really want to run the Mets themselves.

01:00:27.000 Okay, I think we're ready for calls now.

01:00:28.000 This is a video drop from Will.

01:00:35.000 What do you got?

01:00:36.000 I have it right here.

01:00:39.000 Okay.

01:00:43.000 Turn it up.

01:00:44.000 Cut me off again like that.

01:00:45.000 You're going to have a serious problem.

01:00:47.000 Touching my door is assaults.

01:00:48.000 Touching my door is assault.

01:00:49.000 Are you a fucking retard or what?

01:00:52.000 Are you a fucking retard?

01:00:54.000 You ever cut me off again like that?

01:00:55.000 You're going to have a serious marketing problem.

01:00:57.000 Touching my door is assaults.

01:00:58.000 Touching my door is assaulting.

01:00:59.000 Touching my door is assault.

01:01:04.000 I don't think this guy's going to.

01:01:06.000 Touching my door is assault.

01:01:09.000 That's true, but your door has to press charges.

01:01:12.000 You cannot press charges on behalf of your door.

01:01:14.000 I don't know if an inanimate object can do that.

01:01:18.000 It doesn't work that way.

01:01:19.000 He touched me.

01:01:20.000 I didn't want him to touch.

01:01:20.000 Where did he touch you?

01:01:21.000 On my door.

01:01:23.000 You mean your pussy lips?

01:01:24.000 No.

01:01:25.000 Your mouth?

01:01:25.000 Your asshole?

01:01:26.000 No, the door of my car.

01:01:28.000 Yeah.

01:01:29.000 That's not a door on your body.

01:01:31.000 You're not your car, you realize.

01:01:35.000 He touched me on my front gate.

01:01:38.000 You mean your foreskin?

01:01:40.000 No, no, no.

01:01:40.000 The front gate of my house.

01:01:42.000 Yeah, the entranceway to my sidewalk.

01:01:45.000 He rang my doorbell.

01:01:47.000 He pushed your clit?

01:01:49.000 No.

01:01:49.000 No, no, no.

01:01:50.000 My doorbell in my house.

01:01:52.000 Okay, that's not.

01:01:54.000 Did you say whorebell?

01:01:55.000 Because then we can get this figured right the fuck out.

01:01:57.000 If you rang your whorebell, I mean, he's fucked.

01:02:00.000 Oh, my God.

01:02:01.000 I feel so violated.

01:02:02.000 What happened?

01:02:03.000 Show me on the doll where he touched you.

01:02:05.000 Outside the doll on the door of the car the doll was driving.

01:02:09.000 Do you have a car doll?

01:02:10.000 Barbie's for vet.

01:02:11.000 Did you put the doll in a car and then open the door?

01:02:14.000 In an old dude Dodge Ram.

01:02:17.000 We've got cold.

01:02:19.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute.

01:02:20.000 Dear, my quest for an old car is getting worse and worse on a daily basis.

01:02:26.000 I'm getting farther away from my goal, which is just, I have one goal.

01:02:30.000 An aesthetically appealing car that runs and I don't have to worry about it.

01:02:36.000 That's it.

01:02:36.000 That's all I'm asking Earth.

01:02:38.000 And it has been a three-month quest.

01:02:40.000 I told you on Kumiya's show, I went and saw a 320IS or something from 82.

01:02:47.000 It was a fucking nightmare.

01:02:49.000 It was four mechanics.

01:02:51.000 And even mechanics go, this car is challenging.

01:02:54.000 The guy didn't want to sell it to me because he caught me going down a hill with the clutch down.

01:02:59.000 And it was like if I was going to adopt a dog and I swatted it in the head.

01:03:04.000 It's like, I don't know.

01:03:06.000 I think that's fine, actually.

01:03:08.000 It's not up for adoption anymore.

01:03:09.000 You have the clutch down going down a hill.

01:03:11.000 You touched the door.

01:03:13.000 You assaulted my clutch.

01:03:15.000 But I didn't even know you're not supposed to do that.

01:03:18.000 But when a car's in, and even a motorcycle, if your car's in neutral or your motorcycle's in neutral, if it's stick shift or manual, you don't have control of the vehicle.

01:03:27.000 Well, I can go right, left, and I can break.

01:03:29.000 You have no control over the vehicle.

01:03:30.000 I can break.

01:03:31.000 Oh, you could, but that's not control of a vehicle.

01:03:36.000 Going down a hill with second going, ah!

01:03:39.000 Seems like I'd rather just sort of like.

01:03:42.000 When I'm going down a hill with the clutchdown, everything's off the books.

01:03:46.000 It's like paying cash.

01:03:48.000 The IRS doesn't have to know.

01:03:50.000 And then when we get down, back into third, whatever.

01:03:53.000 Yeah.

01:03:54.000 But that blew my like when I, I don't think I even could have said yes.

01:03:59.000 Did you notice that at the end?

01:04:00.000 Yeah.

01:04:01.000 He was like selling me off it.

01:04:03.000 He's like, he wanted you off the road.

01:04:09.000 Danesh D'Souza.

01:04:13.000 Dear Gavin, I heard yourself and Kumia on his show talking about Jags.

01:04:16.000 You were correct about early Jags being unreliable.

01:04:20.000 But there were a few golden years when Ford took over the company and fixed the notorious electrical issues.

01:04:27.000 Thanks to that and Jaguar's bomb-proof 4.0 inline 6 engine, cars built between 1992 and 96 are some of the most reliable Jags ever made.

01:04:38.000 Pull up a 1993 Jaguar.

01:04:41.000 And they look like a Ford Taurus.

01:04:43.000 If they look like shit, we're back to square one.

01:04:47.000 The great thing about these years is they have the reliability and those amazing classic looks.

01:04:51.000 They are superb to drive and with the luxurious wood and leather interior.

01:04:54.000 Blah, blah, blah.

01:04:54.000 Check out the Jaguar XJ40.

01:04:58.000 Those are beautiful.

01:05:01.000 Those are not Ford Tauruses, Maddie.

01:05:04.000 Oh, those are them.

01:05:05.000 Oh, come on.

01:05:05.000 Look at the black one there in the middle.

01:05:08.000 That's a hunk.

01:05:10.000 That's a hunk, a hunk, a burning love.

01:05:13.000 Oh, come on.

01:05:15.000 That's exactly what I'm looking for.

01:05:18.000 Check out the XJ40, XJS Facelift, X300, and the XJR6, which is the supercharged version of the X300.

01:05:27.000 Find a rust-free, well-looked-after example, and you'll be fine.

01:05:30.000 Stay away from the cars with the V12 engines.

01:05:33.000 They are amazing when they run.

01:05:35.000 I got to put a special flag on this.

01:05:38.000 They're amazing when they run, but they do have gremlins and can be a fucking nightmare to repair.

01:05:44.000 Sorry if my grammar is wank.

01:05:46.000 I'm a gas engineer, not a writer, bitch.

01:05:50.000 Much love, John, from England.

01:05:52.000 I get a lot of that from baby monsters.

01:05:54.000 I would write this to Kevin, but he would correct me.

01:05:58.000 Let me see more of these pics.

01:06:01.000 Sure, sure.

01:06:02.000 And you're still interested in the...

01:06:04.000 Did we lose our studio audience?

01:06:05.000 In the Rivian?

01:06:07.000 I think we lost them.

01:06:11.000 Yeah, those are fucking beautiful.

01:06:13.000 That's exactly what I want.

01:06:14.000 XJC.

01:06:15.000 Although I wouldn't mind the leaping jag on the front.

01:06:18.000 Yeah, that's just a hood ornament.

01:06:20.000 I guess I could just glue it on.

01:06:22.000 Oh, that one's got one.

01:06:24.000 No, not that one.

01:06:25.000 It also has to be black.

01:06:27.000 Hey, baby monsters out there, can you help me find just anything, man?

01:06:31.000 Anything.

01:06:32.000 I don't actually care if it's a fucking Nissan.

01:06:35.000 It just has to be weird and old, but not so old that it has no AC and no power steering and all that shit.

01:06:44.000 Okay, now we're getting into a car rut.

01:06:48.000 Gav's Next Car from Jason.

01:06:51.000 Maybe if you need more style.

01:06:53.000 Oh yeah, these people keep sending me to Hemmings.

01:06:57.000 Wow, this is pretty cool.

01:06:59.000 Look at this.

01:07:00.000 The subject is Gav's Next Car, Ryan.

01:07:03.000 Gotcha.

01:07:04.000 There's two emails, but the first one has a gross green but beautiful car, $15,000.

01:07:13.000 36,000 miles on it?

01:07:16.000 And it's from what year is this?

01:07:20.000 73?

01:07:22.000 What?

01:07:23.000 1973.

01:07:25.000 1973 for $15,000.

01:07:27.000 That's $36,000.

01:07:29.000 Now people, I like, mine has to be black, but people go, if you paint it, you'll ruin the value.

01:07:35.000 But what if I wrap it?

01:07:38.000 You still have to do body work on it if you wrap it, because if there's any dents or paintings or things.

01:07:44.000 I want to do body work.

01:07:45.000 I don't want to fuck it.

01:07:46.000 If I see rust, I want that fixed.

01:07:48.000 Right.

01:07:50.000 So then you just, when you want to sell it, you unwrap it.

01:07:53.000 What are you showing me now, Ryan?

01:07:55.000 This is one of them that says Gavin's.

01:07:56.000 Gav's next to you.

01:07:57.000 No, no.

01:07:58.000 Shithead.

01:07:58.000 The one from 5.41 p.m.

01:08:01.000 Okay.

01:08:05.000 Wait a minute.

01:08:07.000 None of the shit that you've clicked on has anything to do with what I'm talking about.

01:08:11.000 From Jason.

01:08:13.000 Jason, 5.41 p.m.

01:08:15.000 Maybe if you need some more style.

01:08:17.000 Got it.

01:08:17.000 Oh, okay.

01:08:18.000 If you need some more style.

01:08:21.000 God, you suck.

01:08:24.000 Look at this beauty.

01:08:25.000 And again, the reason I bring this up on my show is not to make you go find me a car, but just to say, why can't we have beauty in our lives anymore?

01:08:36.000 If this was 1980, I would want a car by a major roadway just to look at the masterpieces that we're going by.

01:08:43.000 Now, when we're at our bar and I look out the window, I see the exact same motherfucking car thousands of times a minute.

01:08:52.000 Look at that.

01:08:52.000 That's a fucking beaut.

01:08:56.000 Wait, go back to the one you just showed.

01:08:59.000 Show other pictures of that.

01:09:02.000 One of the best Mercedes back in the day, probably late 80s, early 90s, was the 560 SEC.

01:09:10.000 Very popular.

01:09:12.000 Very high-end at the time.

01:09:15.000 560 SEC?

01:09:17.000 Yeah, 560 SEC.

01:09:19.000 What's going on with your boy?

01:09:20.000 He ordered some food.

01:09:22.000 Oh.

01:09:26.000 That's still pretty pretty.

01:09:27.000 I think they started becoming ugly around 95.

01:09:33.000 Like you look at Land Rovers, and that's around when they started to turn into bubbles.

01:09:42.000 And I always turn into a fag when I'm buying these things.

01:09:45.000 And they go, yeah, the fuel gauge is broken, but I just checked the mileage, and I know it can run like 150 miles.

01:09:51.000 And then I go, oh, that's like my Bonneville, my Triumph.

01:09:53.000 I just set the odometer.

01:09:55.000 And they go, oh, yeah, is it fuel injected or a carburetor?

01:09:58.000 And instead of going, I don't really know.

01:09:59.000 I just bought it because I like the look of it.

01:10:00.000 I just go, fuel injected.

01:10:06.000 And he goes, really?

01:10:07.000 What year is it?

01:10:08.000 And now I don't, I think it's 2003, but because of my lie with the fuel injection of the carburetor, I don't want to prove I'm wrong.

01:10:19.000 So I just go, I don't really know.

01:10:23.000 Now I look even stupider than the guy who could have said he didn't know about the fuel injection of the carburetor.

01:10:29.000 So I go, it's made to look like the old ones, but it's not.

01:10:32.000 It's the new one.

01:10:34.000 I'm getting disgusted just talking about myself.

01:10:37.000 What a loser.

01:10:40.000 And that's probably around the time when the guy's like, I don't want my car in this person's possession.

01:10:47.000 This is the evolution of the Land Rover.

01:10:49.000 Okay.

01:10:50.000 This is what we, Ryan and I kept screaming.

01:10:52.000 Obviously, that's ridiculous, right?

01:10:54.000 That's fucking cool.

01:10:55.000 Yeah, of course it is.

01:10:56.000 But what we were talking about in the car is take that, all right?

01:11:02.000 Take that.

01:11:04.000 They wanted to reboot the Range Rover Defender.

01:11:07.000 I don't think that's a Defender, but take one of those two, right?

01:11:11.000 Verbatim, not even that one, the two you just showed, and fucking motherfucking trick out the interior like a Tesla with a huge screen and crazy buttons and cooling and heated seats and all that stuff,

01:11:27.000 but make the exterior look like that.

01:11:30.000 How is that so crazy?

01:11:33.000 Why am I a nut?

01:11:34.000 Look at this.

01:11:35.000 24 cards with the coolest retro design.

01:11:38.000 Okay, suck my penis.

01:11:40.000 All right, there's more.

01:11:43.000 The Bronco.

01:11:44.000 That one looks promising.

01:11:45.000 The original one looks like shit.

01:11:46.000 Borderline acceptable.

01:11:48.000 That's a children's toy that he plays with in the bath.

01:11:51.000 That's whatever.

01:11:52.000 I'm 51 years old, so I'm sure a lot of rich 21s like that.

01:11:55.000 Mercedes-Benz G-Class.

01:11:56.000 Yeah, that proves what I was just saying.

01:11:58.000 You see the success of the G-Class, and you go, all right, I own Range Rover.

01:12:04.000 Why don't I take that when we looked like that and trick out the interior and the engine, obviously, and all that shit?

01:12:11.000 Like, it's so fucking...

01:12:12.000 It's like SNL.

01:12:13.000 Stop reading cue cards.

01:12:15.000 You're the kings of fucking improv.

01:12:18.000 Just riff.

01:12:20.000 Have the basic, just like Kirby Enthusiasm, where they get the basic talking points.

01:12:25.000 You can still have writers, by the way.

01:12:27.000 That BMW is gorgeous.

01:12:29.000 And just riff.

01:12:30.000 Someone sent this in.

01:12:31.000 This is a third generation from 94 to 2001.

01:12:34.000 They made this.

01:12:34.000 That's perfect.

01:12:36.000 That's third generation 7 series.

01:12:39.000 Wait, no, that one you just had in the top?

01:12:42.000 Top left?

01:12:43.000 No, the one next to it.

01:12:44.000 That's exactly what I'm looking for.

01:12:46.000 It's classy.

01:12:47.000 It's nice.

01:12:48.000 And those, if they're above 1990, you don't have to wrap them up and hide them in the garage all winter.

01:12:54.000 But these 80s cars, they're steel on the bottom.

01:12:57.000 That's gay.

01:12:59.000 That's a Doctor Who enemy, bad guy.

01:13:02.000 No, that's fucking lame.

01:13:04.000 Oh my God, that's embarrassing.

01:13:05.000 That's a weird divorced Puerto Rican.

01:13:08.000 No, I don't want that.

01:13:09.000 You can just prop open the door with that wood stick there.

01:13:13.000 Maddie?

01:13:14.000 Fuck off.

01:13:15.000 Sure, whatever.

01:13:17.000 Suck my dick.

01:13:18.000 Fake muscle cars.

01:13:20.000 Stupid European reboots.

01:13:22.000 Although, wait, go back.

01:13:24.000 No, whatever.

01:13:25.000 I'm pretty impressed, though, that they got that adventurous.

01:13:28.000 Go back with that thing.

01:13:30.000 You got to admit, that's pretty ballsy.

01:13:31.000 That's a Nissan?

01:13:32.000 Wow.

01:13:33.000 Looks like a freeze out of this.

01:13:34.000 If that's a new car.

01:13:37.000 It hails from the late 1980s.

01:13:39.000 Okay, well, then you're cheating.

01:13:40.000 I thought it was modern cars that are like reboots.

01:13:44.000 Yeah.

01:13:44.000 80s.

01:13:45.000 Jimmy.

01:13:47.000 That's cheating.

01:13:48.000 That came out in like 87.

01:13:50.000 Yeah, that's cheating.

01:13:52.000 The only thing I would want to see here is if it was cool cars from 2021.

01:13:58.000 All right, boring.

01:13:59.000 We're boring people.

01:13:59.000 The evolution of the Land Rover.

01:14:02.000 Gorgeous, breathtaking.

01:14:03.000 What's that?

01:14:03.000 Shitty.

01:14:04.000 What is that?

01:14:04.000 That is terrible.

01:14:05.000 What year is that?

01:14:07.000 That's when they went to shit.

01:14:08.000 2017.

01:14:10.000 That's also boring.

01:14:12.000 Not horrible.

01:14:13.000 That sucks.

01:14:13.000 That's when it's starting to get lame.

01:14:15.000 2008.

01:14:16.000 That's just embarrassing.

01:14:18.000 Like, if you gave that Land Rover to me for free, that blue one, I would put it on cars.com the next day to sell.

01:14:25.000 It's quiet.

01:14:26.000 I don't want that.

01:14:27.000 It's convertible.

01:14:28.000 I hate convertibles.

01:14:30.000 A convertible truck?

01:14:33.000 Fuck off.

01:14:34.000 What do you put in the back there?

01:14:36.000 A Christmas tree?

01:14:37.000 That's going for like a Ford Explorer type deal.

01:14:39.000 Lick my balls.

01:14:41.000 Go fuck yourself.

01:14:44.000 Hey.

01:14:45.000 That's pretty.

01:14:46.000 What's that?

01:14:47.000 Last Land Rover Defender rolled off production in 2016.

01:14:50.000 What?

01:14:51.000 Retaining the same classic shape and basic design, modernized with some creature comforts.

01:14:55.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

01:14:56.000 This is exactly what I said they should do, and it looks like they did it.

01:15:00.000 I don't remember seeing that.

01:15:02.000 The last one rolled off in 2016.

01:15:05.000 Okay.

01:15:06.000 Look up the 2016 Land Rover Defender in other pictures.

01:15:10.000 Something's not right here.

01:15:12.000 Go back up, though, Ryan.

01:15:14.000 2016 Land Rover Defender Google Image.

01:15:17.000 Because that looks really pretty.

01:15:20.000 It does.

01:15:20.000 It looks like a Bentley or something.

01:15:25.000 Looks very boxy, like what you want.

01:15:27.000 Yeah.

01:15:30.000 That's pretty recent.

01:15:31.000 I remember us looking at pictures of this and you were like, oh, cool.

01:15:34.000 And then you went to go see it.

01:15:35.000 Then I test drove the 2021 for $100,000 and went suck my dick.

01:15:42.000 But that's a really cool-looking car.

01:15:45.000 Let's see if they got any for sale here.

01:15:48.000 But I already have a Land Rover.

01:15:50.000 I want to get that like old Merc.

01:15:51.000 Anyway, we're getting lost in my Amazon wish list.

01:15:56.000 Let's take some calls.

01:15:58.000 Look at that!

01:15:59.000 Fuck you!

01:16:01.000 Fuck you!

01:16:02.000 Looks like Robocop's helmet.

01:16:03.000 That's a baby in the bathtub going the back of it looks iron.

01:16:10.000 That one sucks.

01:16:10.000 Yeah, that's the new Defender.

01:16:12.000 The back looks okay.

01:16:14.000 What about these Rivians that the guy was telling you about?

01:16:16.000 That look like that.

01:16:18.000 These Rivians, it's electric.

01:16:22.000 It doesn't really kill your bill.

01:16:25.000 It's like having an expensive fridge in your house.

01:16:28.000 I know.

01:16:29.000 It's totally silent, but there's no engine.

01:16:32.000 The engines are on the tires.

01:16:34.000 So it's nothing but space.

01:16:36.000 Like the front is a trunk, the back is a trunk.

01:16:38.000 And because the engines are airtight, you can't flood it.

01:16:44.000 You could drive into the ocean.

01:16:47.000 What happens is when the water gets up to like the top window, it just becomes buoyant and starts floating.

01:16:54.000 But if you threw a bunch of cinder blocks in there, you could drive underwater.

01:17:01.000 It's about, it's $58K, but you get a $10,000 tax grant.

01:17:06.000 So it's $58K.

01:17:09.000 I've never heard of it.

01:17:11.000 Brand new.

01:17:13.000 The first run were all blue.

01:17:15.000 It's a bastard year.

01:17:17.000 Don't buy it.

01:17:19.000 Well, I know.

01:17:19.000 I hate green shit.

01:17:22.000 But I don't know.

01:17:25.000 It seems kind of cool.

01:17:28.000 And it's not ugly.

01:17:31.000 Definitely bogus looking, but it's not in a bad way.

01:17:36.000 What?

01:17:37.000 800 cents.

01:17:38.000 It looks weird as fuck.

01:17:40.000 And not classic at all.

01:17:41.000 It looks very futuristic, but in a good way.

01:17:43.000 But no, but as far as modern cars, actually, that is pretty fucking...

01:17:47.000 It looks like a Disney character.

01:17:49.000 Yeah, like a talking car.

01:17:50.000 That's the friend of the...

01:17:51.000 Did I get brainwashed by that mechanic we were talking to?

01:17:54.000 I mean, the pickup truck's pretty dope.

01:17:57.000 And it has that...

01:17:58.000 Here's that seat he was talking about.

01:18:00.000 Like, what the fuck?

01:18:05.000 That's the tunnel he was talking about where you can just pull it out.

01:18:07.000 Yeah, it's just because there's nothing in it.

01:18:09.000 Well, there's nothing in it, right?

01:18:10.000 So they got nothing but little expansion.

01:18:12.000 There's no.

01:18:17.000 And if your house goes, you lose power, they can just reverse the power from the truck back into your house, and now it's a generator.

01:18:26.000 And the horsepower is pretty nuts on it from what I've seen.

01:18:28.000 It was like 835.

01:18:29.000 That's pretty good.

01:18:34.000 It's like 0 to 60 in three seconds?

01:18:36.000 What was the 82 BMW we're looking at?

01:18:38.000 It was like 50 horsepower or something?

01:18:42.000 Yeah.

01:18:42.000 Yeah, no, it was 80 or 50.

01:18:44.000 It was like 0 to 60 in 20 minutes.

01:18:47.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:18:49.000 You can feel it.

01:18:51.000 All right, let's take some Khazals.

01:18:53.000 My bean is.

01:18:55.000 All right.

01:18:57.000 We have on the line.

01:18:59.000 Oh, you have to turn on your little Huzima Whatser.

01:19:03.000 Do I or just Maddie?

01:19:04.000 No, I think mine was on and then died, but I'll try it.

01:19:11.000 So you still haven't figured out how to make this work on Skype?

01:19:16.000 It can't.

01:19:20.000 I don't believe you.

01:19:24.000 You cannot feel it.

01:19:26.000 It's my penis.

01:19:27.000 I love Ryan.

01:19:28.000 He gets confronted with a major problem.

01:19:30.000 He's like, can't be done.

01:19:31.000 Nope.

01:19:32.000 It's impossible.

01:19:33.000 Chino, you've got a nope.

01:19:35.000 Hi, Christopher Columbus.

01:19:37.000 I'd like you to try to see if you can get to the Caribbean.

01:19:41.000 Nope, can't be done.

01:19:42.000 Can't be done.

01:19:43.000 It's too far.

01:19:44.000 No, they wanted him to go to America.

01:19:45.000 He went to the Caribbean.

01:19:46.000 So if you're telling me to go to America, I can get you Caribbean.

01:19:50.000 Okay.

01:19:50.000 This is Caribbean.

01:19:51.000 Get me to the Caribbean.

01:19:52.000 This is the Caribbean.

01:19:52.000 Oh, okay.

01:19:53.000 With these mics.

01:19:56.000 We got show me the painter.

01:19:58.000 I'm here to talk about curvy woman.

01:20:01.000 Is this true?

01:20:02.000 Hey, Gavin.

01:20:03.000 Uhuru.

01:20:04.000 Uhuru.

01:20:05.000 Hold for a second.

01:20:06.000 How's Outer Space coming along?

01:20:08.000 Yeah, hold for a second.

01:20:09.000 This happens.

01:20:11.000 It happens.

01:20:13.000 Ryan fucks up his job.

01:20:15.000 That happens.

01:20:16.000 Welcome, host.

01:20:17.000 You are now in the host room.

01:20:18.000 Oh, here we go.

01:20:22.000 1998 Chevy Tahoe.

01:20:25.000 This is kind of the cool thing about this show, selfishly for me, is when I talk about something I want, like I want to move out of here, I get 7,000 emails, and then I make a topographical map of all the places where they say it's good to move to.

01:20:39.000 And North Carolina, South Carolina, Florida, Greenhill, it seems to be the spot.

01:20:44.000 One second, sir.

01:20:46.000 Okay.

01:20:46.000 Hello, can you hear me?

01:20:47.000 Yes, I can.

01:20:48.000 How you doing?

01:20:48.000 Hey, what's going on?

01:20:53.000 How you doing?

01:20:56.000 Hello, Mom Line.

01:20:58.000 Yes, can you hear us?

01:21:02.000 Hello?

01:21:05.000 Oh, I got a spinning wheel.

01:21:07.000 Hello, Ryan.

01:21:08.000 You got me?

01:21:09.000 Hold on.

01:21:10.000 Wow, this is quality entertainment.

01:21:18.000 So this guy's suggesting a Chevy Tahoe from 1998.

01:21:22.000 It looks fine, but I got an SUV.

01:21:25.000 I want a little sedan that is beautiful.

01:21:29.000 David, can you hear me?

01:21:30.000 Yeah, can you hear me?

01:21:33.000 Fucking Ryan, can you just not spend your mornings doing nothing and spend them fixing this problem?

01:21:39.000 There's nothing consistent about any of this.

01:21:42.000 Yes, there is.

01:21:43.000 It never works.

01:21:46.000 That's pretty consistent.

01:21:49.000 Mm.

01:21:51.000 Well, at least we have a cow's two cents.

01:21:57.000 How we doing there, fuckheads?

01:22:02.000 Nothing?

01:22:04.000 Okay.

01:22:06.000 Painter, you're on the line.

01:22:08.000 Hello?

01:22:13.000 That might be a hint thing.

01:22:15.000 Here's Vic.

01:22:17.000 Hello, Vic?

01:22:22.000 Hello, Vic?

01:22:23.000 Are you calling the show where half of the guys are fucking idiots?

01:22:27.000 Or a third?

01:22:32.000 This is awesome, Rye Guy.

01:22:34.000 Awesome.

01:22:36.000 Remember the time you showed up here at work and you went to buy Halloween supplies?

01:22:41.000 Because you said, I got nothing else to do.

01:22:44.000 And I understand that this is way over your head, but you bring in someone like Ray or Garrett or fucking Tony Sereno or whatever his name was.

01:22:55.000 I want to hear your opinion.

01:22:56.000 Thank you.

01:22:57.000 All right, there you go.

01:22:58.000 There we go.

01:22:58.000 It's fixed.

01:22:59.000 Ready to rock.

01:23:00.000 Hello?

01:23:02.000 Hey, Gavin.

01:23:03.000 It's Joey.

01:23:04.000 Hey, Joey.

01:23:05.000 What's going on?

01:23:05.000 Hey, real good.

01:23:07.000 Wanted to hear your opinion real quick on curvy girls.

01:23:10.000 Not all of us are into stick-figure women.

01:23:12.000 Some of us like them with a little meat on their bones.

01:23:15.000 And I wanted to hear what your thoughts are on women that got a little extra.

01:23:20.000 Specifically, a gal named Gina Carano that starred in the Manchester team.

01:23:25.000 I think she's a spongy.

01:23:27.000 Fantastic.

01:23:28.000 I told Josh Denny, who knows her, to make it clear that I'd love to eat her out.

01:23:32.000 And he's like, okay, I'll put that in the list of 7 million people who have told me exactly that.

01:23:38.000 Here's the deal with chubby ladies.

01:23:40.000 You just have to pay your waste tax.

01:23:43.000 So to be specific, obviously, like, this is kind of ideal, right?

01:23:53.000 Yeah, for sure.

01:23:54.000 This is still workable.

01:23:57.000 We're still in.

01:24:01.000 This, okay, if it's a one-night stand, and I'm not even saying anything, but if we're getting married, I wouldn't mind a slight reduction.

01:24:10.000 And then when we're getting to this kind of stuff, now we're like, alrighty, this is not great.

01:24:16.000 And then, of course, the biggest problem is as women get older, they get fat and they lose weight, and they have that weird gunt that hangs down over their belt like a tit.

01:24:26.000 And that's a deal breaker.

01:24:27.000 But like, from this to this, I think we're good to go.

01:24:35.000 No, I agree with you.

01:24:37.000 I prefer her to any woman with less weight.

01:24:41.000 I would say Gina Carano is the perfect body weight for a woman.

01:24:46.000 Hey, that's excellent.

01:24:47.000 We agree on that one then.

01:24:49.000 Hey, last question for you.

01:24:51.000 Do you think you'll ever do cameos again?

01:24:53.000 Oh, so what we decided to do with cameos, I'm glad you brought that up.

01:24:56.000 I'm working out with Zenoa.

01:24:58.000 I just figured the other day, fuck Cameo.

01:25:02.000 Like, if you send me proof that you sent her $75, then you can also send her the parameters.

01:25:10.000 You can email me the parameters with a picture.

01:25:13.000 Actually, let's do it right now.

01:25:15.000 So her Venmo is ProudLioness, I believe.

01:25:20.000 Let me just double-check that.

01:25:22.000 Okay.

01:25:24.000 Sure.

01:25:26.000 It is.

01:25:27.000 Yeah.

01:25:28.000 So her Cash App is ProudLioness.

01:25:32.000 Her PayPal is ProudLioness, all one word.

01:25:37.000 And Lioness has two S's.

01:25:39.000 ZK.

01:25:41.000 So let me just repeat this.

01:25:42.000 Cash app, two separate words, Proud Lion S. Proud is one word.

01:25:47.000 Lion S is Lion ESS.

01:25:51.000 Her PayPal is at ProudLioness, all one word, Lion ESS, and then ZK.

01:25:59.000 So send her $75.

01:26:02.000 Send me proof that you sent her $75 with your write-up of what you want, and I'll fucking suck Ryan off.

01:26:11.000 Hell yeah.

01:26:12.000 Hey now.

01:26:12.000 Yeah.

01:26:13.000 Yeah.

01:26:14.000 Let's go.

01:26:14.000 Hey, Dad.

01:26:15.000 Happy birthday.

01:26:19.000 All right.

01:26:20.000 Gavin, I like you more than a friend.

01:26:21.000 Thanks, man.

01:26:22.000 All right.

01:26:22.000 And that guy got two things.

01:26:24.000 We don't usually give guys two things, but he was our 37th caller and the only one we could hear.

01:26:30.000 You guys calling about Montreal.

01:26:33.000 What do you got?

01:26:34.000 Mount Real?

01:26:39.000 Might be listening to the radio.

01:26:40.000 Let's get this guy, Korea.

01:26:43.000 Put him on mute.

01:26:45.000 Hey.

01:26:47.000 Korea in death.

01:26:50.000 Welcome to the world's worst call-in show where we can't hear you and you can't hear us.

01:26:58.000 Bonjour.

01:26:59.000 Gabon.

01:27:00.000 Bonjour, comon sava.

01:27:02.000 Suvien de Montreal.

01:27:05.000 Coix?

01:27:11.000 He's listening in the background.

01:27:15.000 What is it, sir?

01:27:20.000 Oh, now he's just fucking with us.

01:27:22.000 He's laughing at us.

01:27:26.000 Maybe.

01:27:26.000 Or maybe he's laughing at something else and he can't hear us, Ryan.

01:27:29.000 Maybe.

01:27:30.000 Can you hear me?

01:27:31.000 Yeah.

01:27:32.000 Not really, but yes.

01:27:35.000 Okay, y'all yell.

01:27:36.000 I was just going through the archives and I just saw like the first episode you did with uncensored and you mentioned Slavoy Žisek.

01:27:47.000 That guy where he's always like he has torettes and he's always grabbing his nose.

01:27:54.000 Have you like looked into him?

01:27:56.000 Slavoy Živek.

01:28:00.000 Is he a funny Greek guy?

01:28:02.000 Yeah, well, he's like something.

01:28:05.000 He's like a Slavvy you're talking about.

01:28:09.000 What was that?

01:28:10.000 Slavy.

01:28:12.000 Yeah, something like that.

01:28:13.000 Yeah, he's super funny.

01:28:15.000 He's like always talking like this and rubs his art and always scratch his nose.

01:28:20.000 Oh wait, maybe that's not who I'm thinking of.

01:28:22.000 I'm thinking of a comedian named Slavy who is Greek and he's bald.

01:28:26.000 He's got a mustache.

01:28:27.000 He's missing a tooth.

01:28:28.000 And he's really funny.

01:28:30.000 Ryan, look up S-L-A-V-O-J.

01:28:35.000 Slavoy.

01:28:36.000 And it's like, remember that?

01:28:37.000 D-I-Z-E-K.

01:28:40.000 Yeah, I remember.

01:28:41.000 Wait a minute.

01:28:42.000 Is this the guy who wrote Death of the West?

01:28:46.000 Oh, this is...

01:28:46.000 No, this is...

01:28:48.000 Yeah, we talked about him many times.

01:28:50.000 He's a guy who defends communism all the time.

01:28:53.000 Yeah, but he's like super anti-woke.

01:28:57.000 Yep.

01:28:58.000 Yep, we're familiar with him.

01:28:59.000 I don't like that he's pro-communist, but whatever.

01:29:03.000 That was a boring call.

01:29:04.000 Thanks for tuning in.

01:29:06.000 Hey, I got a letter here.

01:29:08.000 The letters seem to be more interesting tonight.

01:29:11.000 Hey, Gavin and Ryan, check out these clips to hear Hitchens just decimate our friend Eddie Gloud in attacking his ingratiating tone and extreme vagueness and imprecision.

01:29:23.000 Dude, I fucking have not seen this, but the other day we were talking about, I was watching Eddie Gloud and I thought, can't Christopher Hitchens be alive and be in a room with him to just take him down?

01:29:36.000 And lo and behold, apparently it has happened.

01:29:39.000 Thank you, God.

01:29:41.000 Go along as far as I can see.

01:29:42.000 It means there's white noise.

01:29:44.000 White noise.

01:29:45.000 White noise, what you're talking to me.

01:29:47.000 Absolutely meaningless.

01:29:48.000 Now, that's not an argument.

01:29:49.000 Let's be very clear.

01:29:51.000 I'm just saying that nothing you say, nothing, I just have to say that I make my living by scrutinizing words.

01:29:56.000 That's what I do.

01:29:57.000 Not a single thing you just said made a word of sense to me.

01:30:01.000 And I don't think it would have written down either.

01:30:05.000 I just basically quoted to you coming out of the Oxford text of Albert Rabbiteau's slave religion.

01:30:12.000 And it changes haven't you?

01:30:13.000 No, no, I want to be very clear that a good argument is a great argument.

01:30:17.000 And part of what we've seen here is that when we have the opportunity to engage in reasoned debate, intelligent conversation, we slip into ad hominem arguments.

01:30:29.000 Part of what I was trying to suggest is that they engage in interpretation.

01:30:38.000 They do certain kinds of work that will allow them to bring critique to bear on other interpretations that they disagree with.

01:30:44.000 How many are meaningless?

01:30:46.000 Bear the brunt.

01:30:48.000 None of those words, however arranged, had any content to me.

01:30:51.000 I'm very sorry to have to say it.

01:30:53.000 Hold it right there, but...

01:30:54.000 You would not pass my course.

01:30:55.000 I'm not even disagreeing with you, let alone being at home in it.

01:30:58.000 I don't understand a word you're saying, and it would be no better on the page.

01:31:01.000 Try this.

01:31:02.000 What Eddie Cloud says is not wrong.

01:31:05.000 It's not English.

01:31:07.000 He just says America is not alone in its sins, but it is alone in its fear to recognize them.

01:31:14.000 And my family didn't have to do that because we didn't have to bear the brunt of the prejudice within our community.

01:31:20.000 It just sounds, it's like gobbledygook.

01:31:24.000 It's almost like going to Latin Mass.

01:31:26.000 Like you hear the sounds and you go, I kind of get the vibe, but I don't speak that language.

01:31:34.000 Sounds like glib religious babble to me, absolutely.

01:31:38.000 Let me talk to this from the website.

01:31:39.000 I hate that I have to take the side of the atheist against the Christian in this.

01:31:44.000 And the question is to you, Christopher.

01:31:45.000 For the best atheist and the worst Christian.

01:31:47.000 But he says you're holding the high ground of reason and science against assault by superstitious people.

01:31:52.000 Okay, let's jump over to 325.

01:31:54.000 We passed it.

01:31:55.000 Oh, we did?

01:31:55.000 Yeah.

01:31:56.000 We started with 225.

01:31:57.000 We listened for a whole minute?

01:31:58.000 Yeah, we're at 409.

01:32:01.000 I was listening to that for a minute.

01:32:03.000 Correct.

01:32:03.000 Wow.

01:32:04.000 You know something is quality when it feels like five seconds.

01:32:09.000 That's like my lovemaking to my wife.

01:32:12.000 Nothing wrong with that.

01:32:13.000 You know, when you're fucking a woman and she tickles your balls during intercourse, like from behind, reaches around, you know that's actually insulting, right?

01:32:22.000 Because it obviously feels so good, but what she's doing is she's hitting the fast forward button.

01:32:28.000 And going to the end.

01:32:30.000 Like I'm sitting there thinking of my dad naked being attacked by dogs, trying to disconnect my brain from my penis, and then you go and stimulate me.

01:32:38.000 All right, we have another seven pumps left.

01:32:43.000 I hope you like quick endings.

01:32:45.000 30 rapid.

01:32:46.000 Because I had about 30 in me until you started playing your ball games.

01:32:54.000 Balls.

01:32:55.000 And you're not about to say no, but it's like, why are you fast forwarding to the end of the movie?

01:33:00.000 Are you not enjoying this film?

01:33:02.000 It's mean.

01:33:03.000 It's hurtful.

01:33:04.000 You have hurt me.

01:33:05.000 And it's weird because it feels good, but it also hurts.

01:33:10.000 It feels good on the outside, but it feels bad on the inside.

01:33:15.000 Erin's on the line.

01:33:17.000 Sure, she is.

01:33:18.000 Sure he is.

01:33:19.000 Hello, Aaron.

01:33:21.000 Hello, Aaron.

01:33:22.000 Hey, I'm here.

01:33:23.000 How are you, Gavin?

01:33:24.000 I am fine.

01:33:26.000 Hey, it actually fucking worked.

01:33:28.000 Awesome.

01:33:29.000 First off, Maddie, thanks for adding me on all the social media shit.

01:33:33.000 That's super fucking cool.

01:33:35.000 But the reason I'm calling is I think I'm going to get fired.

01:33:39.000 And I think I know why.

01:33:42.000 And I think I know why.

01:33:45.000 Why?

01:33:46.000 So, so I'm being stubborn and not getting the vaccine.

01:33:51.000 And I really wanted your advice on this because I have a good job.

01:33:56.000 My wife gets to be a stay-at-home mom.

01:33:58.000 My kid is living a really good life.

01:34:01.000 And I just feel fucking opposed to it.

01:34:05.000 Sure.

01:34:08.000 And I just, I really wanted your advice because, you know, a bunch of my friends have gotten it.

01:34:13.000 I'll be one of only two people where I work that haven't gotten it.

01:34:17.000 And I'm just, I'm really torn about it.

01:34:20.000 Well, you know, we always talk about.

01:34:22.000 And honestly, I haven't.

01:34:24.000 Oh, go ahead.

01:34:24.000 Go ahead.

01:34:25.000 Like it's this big ultimatum where you go, fuck you, boss.

01:34:29.000 I'm not getting the vaccine.

01:34:31.000 And you can do what you want to me.

01:34:33.000 I don't care.

01:34:34.000 But there's a gray area where you just, and like America fought the British.

01:34:41.000 They didn't lose many people.

01:34:42.000 I think it was like 40,000 or something.

01:34:44.000 And they won the war.

01:34:45.000 The English went home with their tails between their legs.

01:34:48.000 Canada didn't fight the British.

01:34:50.000 They just sort of went, meh, eh, eh.

01:34:54.000 And they kind of just bored them away until they left.

01:34:58.000 The Queen is still on the money, but Britain has no power in Canada.

01:35:02.000 And as a Canadian, I want to give you another option of just like, yeah, I got it.

01:35:06.000 I got it.

01:35:08.000 Okay.

01:35:09.000 We need to see your ID.

01:35:11.000 We need to see your card.

01:35:12.000 Okay.

01:35:13.000 Yeah, I'll bring that.

01:35:13.000 Oh, did I not bring it?

01:35:15.000 Oh, oh.

01:35:17.000 And then you come in the next day.

01:35:19.000 I need your card, Aaron.

01:35:22.000 Yeah.

01:35:24.000 Unfortunately, that's not really an option because I can't really tell you much other than that, but it's not really an option.

01:35:32.000 Oh.

01:35:32.000 I really like that option of just torturing them and saying, I gave it.

01:35:36.000 I gave it to Sandy.

01:35:38.000 And then Sandy, okay, I'll go talk to her.

01:35:40.000 And then I spoke to Sandy.

01:35:41.000 She didn't get it.

01:35:42.000 What?

01:35:44.000 Like, can't you just, you're going to get fired, but you might as well go out in a blaze of torture.

01:35:50.000 Yeah, well, the only good thing is my wife is 100% behind my decision and is, in fact, encouraging me on it, which makes her just the fucking one of the best wives in the fucking world.

01:36:04.000 Yeah, that's fantastic.

01:36:06.000 Dude, Kylie Irving just said goodbye to $136 million.

01:36:10.000 If this is important to you, then lose your fucking job.

01:36:14.000 As much as, like, I don't give a fuck about the NBA.

01:36:18.000 I've got family.

01:36:19.000 I've got friends that watch it.

01:36:20.000 I could give two shits less about the NBA.

01:36:23.000 But when I saw that, I was like, you know what?

01:36:26.000 I've heard that guy's a piece of shit from all of my friends, but good for him.

01:36:30.000 Like, at least he's standing up for what he fucking believes in.

01:36:33.000 Exactly.

01:36:34.000 And I would feel the same way if he got fired because he was too pro-vaccine.

01:36:40.000 I would respect that you have the courage of your convictions.

01:36:45.000 Yeah.

01:36:46.000 So if you can't follow my idea and bore the living shit out of them until they go bald trying to find your fucking card, then lose your job.

01:36:59.000 Get fired.

01:37:00.000 Get in trouble.

01:37:02.000 Hey, can I ask you one more thing, even though I'm not allowed two things?

01:37:06.000 Okay, fine.

01:37:08.000 I met a guy that said that he was at your wedding one time.

01:37:12.000 What's his name?

01:37:15.000 I wish that I could remember, but he owns a bar in a certain city in Texas, and he said that you fucking hate him.

01:37:23.000 And he had your phone number, but he said that if he called you, that you would get fucking pissed, and you might just fly down to Texas and fucking kill him because he may or may not have been flirting with your wife at the wedding.

01:37:38.000 No, he didn't flirt at my wife at the wedding.

01:37:40.000 He flirted with my wife when he was in my home.

01:37:45.000 And that did not go well for him.

01:37:46.000 And I'll spare you more details.

01:37:51.000 But yeah, I would avoid that guy at all costs.

01:37:53.000 He's a fucking con.

01:37:54.000 Thanks for calling.

01:37:55.000 And that brings me to an interesting epiphany I had recently.

01:38:00.000 I wanted to talk to you about this, Maddie.

01:38:02.000 Sure.

01:38:03.000 You know, I spend so much money on guns and cameras and all these what-ifs.

01:38:10.000 And I've got a variety of weapons under my bed.

01:38:13.000 I've got the rifle if we're really going to do this.

01:38:16.000 I've got the machete if it's just kind of like near the window.

01:38:20.000 I've got the baseball bat if it's on the front lawn.

01:38:22.000 There's a whole degree there.

01:38:25.000 And I was thinking about all these external enemies.

01:38:28.000 And yes, they got like Antifa got my brother fired.

01:38:32.000 They put my friends in jail for four years.

01:38:34.000 But did Antifa really put my friends in jail for four years?

01:38:37.000 Antifa refused to press charges.

01:38:40.000 They said, fuck you to the cops.

01:38:42.000 It was the Soros-appointed DA, Mark Dwyer and Steinglass and Cyrus Vance who did all that, right?

01:38:48.000 That's not really on topic, though.

01:38:51.000 What I realized this week is when I think of real serious damage and attacks on my immediate family, it's all from within the friend circle.

01:39:05.000 Like Ian Mackay says of Minor Threat, isn't it nice you don't have to look far to find the ones who leave the deepest scar?

01:39:11.000 Absolutely.

01:39:13.000 Like it was my friends that hit on my wife.

01:39:16.000 It was my fucking friends like Vedvice that got that fired me from vice or ousted me from vice, whatever.

01:39:24.000 You know, it was my friends that turned a blind eye when my son wasn't getting drafted for baseball because he was my son and allowed it to happen.

01:39:35.000 Fucking you.

01:39:37.000 I don't know how much I can say, but in certain clubs, certain guys that you would have called your brothers.

01:39:43.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:39:44.000 Exactly.

01:39:46.000 Well, it's called jealousy and envy.

01:39:49.000 Right, but we're all like, we're all like, we sit here and talk about Antifa and Antifa talks about how all cops are bastards, but no one kills more Antifa than Antifa.

01:39:58.000 Like the pressure that that guy, I always forget his fucking name, Noah.

01:40:04.000 Remember, Rest in Power?

01:40:07.000 That guy, he was encouraged by Antifa to get involved in the J-20 protest.

01:40:11.000 He got in over his head.

01:40:12.000 He was facing felony charges.

01:40:14.000 He killed himself.

01:40:16.000 Now, obviously.

01:40:17.000 Nathan Hose.

01:40:18.000 Nathan Hose.

01:40:19.000 So he's responsible for his own actions, obviously.

01:40:22.000 But Powboys didn't fucking kill him.

01:40:24.000 Prowboys didn't tell him to commit vandalism when Trump was elected.

01:40:28.000 His fellow Antifa brothers did.

01:40:30.000 And he looks like a sad heroin addict who would be in over his head if you asked him to help you move a table.

01:40:38.000 But they thought, fuck it, he makes good human fodder.

01:40:40.000 Let's throw him into the mix.

01:40:42.000 And no one kills more Muslims than Muslims, right?

01:40:45.000 You look at Pakistan.

01:40:46.000 Am I boring you?

01:40:50.000 Checking your watch?

01:40:51.000 No, no, no.

01:40:53.000 Somebody sent a message.

01:40:58.000 So I really, I had this epiphany this week with all these security cams in my house facing outside and facing the sides of the house, the back of the house with the sensor.

01:41:09.000 I don't want to get too into my personal security system, but it's pretty intense.

01:41:14.000 Plate readers, all this shit I spent all this money on, and I'm constantly checking.

01:41:20.000 And then when I think about the real attacks in my life.

01:41:25.000 It have been close people.

01:41:26.000 It's been inside my home with people invited in.

01:41:31.000 Like fucking JL.

01:41:32.000 They come to you with smiles.

01:41:34.000 They come at you with smiles.

01:41:35.000 JL had been a close friend for years.

01:41:38.000 He comes to our house.

01:41:39.000 The next thing you know, we're beating him up twice.

01:41:43.000 And he keeps coming back.

01:41:45.000 Blood.

01:41:46.000 I'm mopping up blood in the front room of my home.

01:41:49.000 Just leave.

01:41:50.000 Just go somewhere else.

01:41:51.000 That's not Antifa blood I was mopping up.

01:41:53.000 That's good friend blood.

01:41:55.000 Ooh, that's a hate crime right there.

01:41:57.000 Really?

01:41:58.000 You never know.

01:41:59.000 Like, when did it turn forward?

01:42:03.000 I don't know.

01:42:04.000 Maybe he was mad that I lived in a big house and he saw my wife and kids and he's alone or something.

01:42:08.000 I don't know.

01:42:09.000 That's the thing.

01:42:10.000 The greatest relationships I had with people in the club I was in, Hell's Names and stuff like that, were people that understood that I didn't want anything that they had.

01:42:19.000 I didn't want their money.

01:42:21.000 I didn't want anything.

01:42:23.000 Just their respect and loyalty and friendship.

01:42:26.000 That's it.

01:42:27.000 Well, the silver lining of this cloud is after every betrayal, you sort of cull the herd.

01:42:34.000 Right.

01:42:34.000 You separate the wheat from the chaff.

01:42:36.000 And then the new ones that remain are the ride or die niggas where you could pull up to their house at four in the morning with a dead prostitute in the trunk.

01:42:44.000 And the guy would go, are you fucking kidding me?

01:42:48.000 What are you doing?

01:42:49.000 You go, we got to fix this.

01:42:51.000 Oh, my God.

01:42:55.000 All right.

01:42:55.000 And they come out with like rubber boots on and a trench coat in their PJs with a shovel.

01:43:00.000 That's it.

01:43:00.000 And they're like, here we go.

01:43:03.000 Jesus H. Christ.

01:43:06.000 I cannot believe you got me in this.

01:43:08.000 I'm not going to be spinning a knife.

01:43:09.000 Okay.

01:43:11.000 I mean, look at you.

01:43:12.000 He's pimping.

01:43:14.000 But it was a real epiphany that I spent so much time worrying about these external enemies when if I were to list like all the betrayals sort of gives the ending away.

01:43:27.000 But all the bad things that have happened to me, like that caller who was talking to my ex-friend in Texas, like hitting on my wife, that's as bad as it gets.

01:43:36.000 You're trying to sabotage my marriage.

01:43:38.000 You're trying to get my kids wouldn't have parents if we got divorced.

01:43:41.000 Like that's as that's my when I have guns, it's because I don't want anyone going near my wife.

01:43:47.000 Right.

01:43:48.000 And you did that in my home.

01:43:50.000 Run through a motherfucker face.

01:43:52.000 So yeah, it's good to have cameras.

01:43:54.000 It's good to have guns.

01:43:55.000 It's good to be wary of outsiders, but you got to be wary of insiders too.

01:43:59.000 Well, I'll be dipped in Shit.

01:44:01.000 It's a difficult situation.

01:44:03.000 It's a very difficult situation.

01:44:04.000 Never happened in the States.

01:44:06.000 Never.

01:44:07.000 It did happen in the States, Tony.

01:44:09.000 They all happened in the States.

01:44:11.000 It did.

01:44:12.000 A hundred percent of the bad things that have happened to me have happened in the States.

01:44:17.000 Oh, oh, oh, that's so disgusting.

01:44:22.000 It's disgusting, but um, who we got here?

01:44:27.000 Spooky.

01:44:30.000 Max, location for living, this man wants to speak about.

01:44:34.000 What's going on, guys?

01:44:36.000 Go on, Max.

01:44:38.000 Hey, so I heard you recently talk about moving us to the Carolinas.

01:44:43.000 And I actually went on a road trip and checked out a couple cities in the Carolinas this weekend.

01:44:51.000 And I'm from New York City originally, been living in Pennsylvania a couple years.

01:44:56.000 And yeah, checked out Florida, checked out the Carolinas and stuff.

01:45:00.000 And honestly, I think you'd be pretty bored in the Carolinas.

01:45:06.000 And I checked out like all the main cities, Charleston, Greenville.

01:45:10.000 I mean, they're definitely more conservative.

01:45:13.000 But I think a better strategy, and I call this the turtle strategy, is you live in Pennsylvania, which is still pretty damn MAGA.

01:45:22.000 I mean, all the billboards here are pretty MAGA.

01:45:25.000 I love the Poke-Nose.

01:45:28.000 Yeah, exactly.

01:45:29.000 So I think that would be better.

01:45:32.000 And that way you're still only an hour and a half from New York City.

01:45:35.000 And hell, I even saw a billboard earlier today with Joe Biden dressed as a Taliban.

01:45:43.000 And it said, make the Taliban great again.

01:45:48.000 So it's definitely...

01:45:49.000 Yeah, but why do I need to be near New York's fucking city?

01:45:54.000 I was just there yesterday.

01:45:56.000 Junkies everywhere.

01:45:58.000 Fucking shit on the streets.

01:46:00.000 Vomit everywhere.

01:46:02.000 And just bizarre smells every 20 feet.

01:46:07.000 And you're constantly...

01:46:08.000 No headphones allowed.

01:46:10.000 You're constantly like, is that guy trying to shove me into the tracks?

01:46:14.000 Yeah, I mean, I mean, boxing stance.

01:46:18.000 I still think that you're going to be bored in the Carolinas because I'm telling you, like, it's definitely cool, but it's nice to at least have the option, in my opinion.

01:46:27.000 How old are you?

01:46:29.000 I'm 26.

01:46:30.000 Yeah.

01:46:31.000 Dude, I'm 51.

01:46:33.000 I like the driving range, old man bars with ex-cons and ex-cops, and the boxing gym.

01:46:42.000 And I like the boxing gym early in the day when it's only people in their 50s who have a lot of trouble delivering a jab that would hurt a baby.

01:46:55.000 That makes sense.

01:46:56.000 And thanks for calling.

01:46:59.000 Generation gap.

01:47:00.000 Well, you know, look at Nick DiPaolo.

01:47:02.000 He still has his edge.

01:47:04.000 He's still full of piss and vinegar, and he moved to paradise.

01:47:07.000 He loves it in Georgia.

01:47:08.000 No, but he was coming from way the fuck up upstate.

01:47:12.000 I should say way the fuck up Westchester, not upstate.

01:47:15.000 He wasn't in fucking Gouverneur, but he was in like not even Croton on Hudson, but like when Westchester sort of stops being Westchester on the west side of Peakskill.

01:47:29.000 Yeah, that kind of stuff.

01:47:30.000 So he's already a rural guy.

01:47:32.000 I don't think he drinks that much.

01:47:34.000 Yeah, we don't need much.

01:47:36.000 I just don't want to look out.

01:47:37.000 This is what I said many months ago.

01:47:40.000 I don't want to walk out my door or walk down the street and be looking at people who hate this country.

01:47:46.000 That's depressing.

01:47:48.000 A bunch of fucking ginos, Jews in name only, who think they're not white and hate white people for stealing this land that they have a $2 million house on.

01:48:00.000 I'm sick of looking at them.

01:48:02.000 You know, when Tucker first got attacked, he said, I'm not fucking moving.

01:48:06.000 Fuck these people.

01:48:07.000 I moved here when I was 12.

01:48:08.000 This is my town.

01:48:10.000 You think you can make me leave just by yelling outside my door once?

01:48:14.000 And then like a year later, he goes, I don't like these people.

01:48:18.000 Fuck you.

01:48:20.000 I hate you.

01:48:22.000 I don't want to live around them.

01:48:24.000 And that's how I feel.

01:48:25.000 Like I look at them and I just think, you're brainwashed.

01:48:28.000 You're in a cult.

01:48:30.000 I don't enjoy your face.

01:48:33.000 It's embarrassing.

01:48:34.000 Aren't you embarrassed?

01:48:36.000 They're going to be a tic-tac.

01:48:37.000 No, I'm just kidding.

01:48:40.000 It could be a box of tic-tacs.

01:48:42.000 Oh, Lord.

01:48:43.000 Dude, that guy needs a beard and a hat really bad.

01:48:46.000 That's a monster.

01:48:49.000 I'll pay for it.

01:48:53.000 Okay, he must be drunk.

01:48:55.000 Imagine watching that.

01:48:56.000 No.

01:48:58.000 I can't.

01:48:58.000 Couldn't.

01:48:59.000 Who are these people?

01:49:03.000 We have.

01:49:06.000 Calling about the rock rap song.

01:49:09.000 Wait, rock and rap have merged?

01:49:12.000 A smash app?

01:49:12.000 That must have happened this afternoon because that's never occurred to anyone before.

01:49:20.000 Gavin, you ever heard the rock rap song?

01:49:23.000 There's a rock rap song?

01:49:26.000 Oh, yeah, man.

01:49:28.000 Oh, my God.

01:49:29.000 Finally, it's like, you put your peanut butter in my chocolate.

01:49:33.000 No, you put your chocolate in my peanut butter.

01:49:36.000 It's called rock rap.

01:49:39.000 Is it the soundtrack for Judgment Night?

01:49:44.000 No.

01:49:46.000 No, but if you just like YouTube it, it's available.

01:49:50.000 Ryan could find it.

01:49:52.000 The people need to hear your commentary.

01:49:55.000 This is going to suck, but okay.

01:49:57.000 Rock rap song.

01:50:01.000 Oh, The Rock Rap Song.

01:50:03.000 Oh, that's different.

01:50:05.000 Twain John.

01:50:06.000 Okay, let's check it out.

01:50:07.000 Thank you for calling.

01:50:10.000 So The Rock has started rapping.

01:50:15.000 Russo, my brother, Tech Nine.

01:50:18.000 You know, I've been thinking about something.

01:50:19.000 I've been talking about it.

01:50:20.000 Wait, wait, wait, stop.

01:50:22.000 Why is he in Fast and Furious every time he opens his fucking mouth?

01:50:27.000 He could be ordering Uber Eats, and he's in Fast and Furious.

01:50:31.000 Hey, I want a cheeseburger with fries.

01:50:35.000 For my family.

01:50:37.000 We're family here.

01:50:38.000 Finally, the rock.

01:50:40.000 Yes, we do.

01:50:40.000 I need to run.

01:50:42.000 I know, you know.

01:50:43.000 We talked about this.

01:50:44.000 Let's give the people more.

01:50:46.000 We gotta give the people more.

01:50:48.000 We gotta jump a fucking Chevy Malibu over a cliff.

01:50:52.000 This is gonna be painful.

01:50:55.000 Spirit of a lion destroys my soul.

01:50:58.000 Give it up to Zionist.

01:50:59.000 Oh my god, I'm already cringing.

01:51:01.000 Give it up to Zion.

01:51:03.000 So he's doing a Polynesian thing too?

01:51:06.000 Like he's making it hookah, hookah, taka.

01:51:08.000 The waka-chaka.

01:51:10.000 Not Maori, but whatever is in his Polynesian area.

01:51:14.000 The Maori is of Polynesia.

01:51:16.000 I don't trust the guy who can't grow.

01:51:17.000 Huka, naka, taka, maka, naka.

01:51:19.000 He has a disorder where he can't grow abs.

01:51:22.000 Those aren't abs?

01:51:24.000 No.

01:51:24.000 I mean, well, no.

01:51:25.000 What kind of faggot looks at the rock's body and goes, I wish he had more abs.

01:51:30.000 No, it's just a defect.

01:51:31.000 I mean, because you look at that.

01:51:33.000 You're a fag fact.

01:51:34.000 No.

01:51:35.000 I'm not.

01:51:36.000 How are your abs?

01:51:38.000 It's like when you're...

01:51:39.000 How's your abs?

01:51:39.000 Let's see your abs.

01:51:40.000 If you're a skateboarder, let's see your abs.

01:51:42.000 I don't have abs.

01:51:43.000 I'm bulking.

01:51:47.000 I don't have abs.

01:51:47.000 I'm bulking.

01:51:49.000 You're a homo.

01:51:50.000 Look at your little bear Chippendale's chest with your fucking penny nipples.

01:51:58.000 I need to stop weird.

01:52:01.000 Yeah, I know.

01:52:04.000 Okay, what do we got?

01:52:11.000 Inside my lobe.

01:52:12.000 It's safe.

01:52:20.000 You don't wanna be in a tussle.

01:52:22.000 You don't wanna be in a tussle.

01:52:24.000 Yeah, you don't wanna be a top gorilla, dropping nil to pop the kills.

01:52:35.000 I'm better than the low brave.

01:52:36.000 When you wake up in that wet blood, ain't no way you're about to get up.

01:52:39.000 How you know that I tacked?

01:52:40.000 That's five to the girls.

01:52:43.000 This is a guy who does it for a living, right?

01:52:45.000 He can do the fast rapping talk.

01:52:46.000 Let's hear the rock get involved.

01:52:55.000 He's laid the groundwork.

01:52:57.000 He's got the chorus, the verse.

01:53:02.000 We're not ready for the rock yet.

01:53:11.000 There we go.

01:53:14.000 They gon' take a piss off.

01:53:16.000 They gon' rumble.

01:53:17.000 They don't take away.

01:53:19.000 It's about drive, it's about power.

01:53:20.000 We stay hungry, we devour.

01:53:22.000 Put in the work, put in the hours, and take what's ours.

01:53:24.000 Like in some morning in my veins, my culture banging with strange.

01:53:27.000 I change a game, so what's my motherfucking name?

01:53:30.000 Rob!

01:53:30.000 What they're gonna get, though?

01:53:31.000 Desecration, defamation.

01:53:32.000 You wanna bring it to the masses?

01:53:34.000 Face to face, now we escalating.

01:53:35.000 When I have to put boost asses, mean on you, like a dream when I'm rumbling, you're gonna scream, mama.

01:53:39.000 So bring drama to the case.

01:53:40.000 Is this an ad for poking bars?

01:53:46.000 Strange music?

01:53:48.000 Yes, correct.

01:53:55.000 Thank you, Brother Tech 9.

01:53:57.000 No, no, thank you.

01:53:58.000 Thank you, Terra Mana.

01:54:00.000 Terra Mana.

01:54:01.000 One take.

01:54:02.000 That's a rap.

01:54:03.000 Oh.

01:54:04.000 Face off.

01:54:05.000 Ground of the gods?

01:54:06.000 Face off.

01:54:07.000 Face off.

01:54:10.000 That was rough, man.

01:54:12.000 That was a wild ride.

01:54:15.000 Things are so cringe.

01:54:16.000 Oh, yeah, it's the Arnold Schwarzenegger rap.

01:54:21.000 Made a trip to the United States.

01:54:28.000 But he became a cringe.

01:54:33.000 You have to fight, you have to get down, you have to do it.

01:54:40.000 That's still way cringier.

01:54:42.000 Superstar.

01:54:45.000 I'm a superstar.

01:54:47.000 I'm so sick of people not recognizing I'm a superstar.

01:54:58.000 The one but who if you believe?

01:55:09.000 Okay, that's enough.

01:55:09.000 We might talk about this.

01:55:12.000 Before we begin, we publish new comments.

01:55:15.000 Singers that rap.

01:55:16.000 I mean, actors that rap.

01:55:18.000 Break some rules, but not the law.

01:55:22.000 Okay, shut up.

01:55:23.000 Shut up.

01:55:25.000 Just take a call.

01:55:26.000 This is infuriating.

01:55:30.000 I'm a superstar.

01:55:31.000 You gotta work hard.

01:55:32.000 Do your homework.

01:55:33.000 Brush your teeth.

01:55:34.000 Are you crazy?

01:55:35.000 Don't forget to live your dreams and put them in the beach.

01:55:39.000 Do another thing if you want to.

01:55:40.000 Check the oil in your car.

01:55:42.000 Make sure all the fluids are up to snatch.

01:55:44.000 Don't get stuck on the road.

01:55:46.000 Don't fuck around.

01:55:46.000 Be nice to your mom.

01:55:48.000 And give your phrase.

01:55:50.000 What are you idiot?

01:55:51.000 Treat your father with respect.

01:55:53.000 He worked hard for you.

01:55:54.000 Don't curl.

01:55:55.000 Smash the subscribe.

01:55:58.000 Nate needs advice.

01:56:01.000 I hope it's not Nate Ober.

01:56:05.000 Come on, man.

01:56:06.000 This is all you.

01:56:08.000 Go ahead.

01:56:08.000 Follow your dreams.

01:56:10.000 Ask me a question.

01:56:10.000 I'll answer it.

01:56:12.000 Then you can know all the stuff you do and be a successful guy.

01:56:17.000 Don't listen to the radio.

01:56:18.000 Talk into the phone.

01:56:20.000 All right, Gavin.

01:56:20.000 This ties into what you were talking about a little bit ago.

01:56:24.000 What do you got?

01:56:26.000 So, five years ago, I came up with a business and a brand.

01:56:30.000 And I am like a creative type, so I knew I needed a salesman.

01:56:37.000 So I found this kid.

01:56:38.000 He's like a firecracker.

01:56:40.000 He can sell ice to an Eskimo.

01:56:42.000 And I partner up with him and start this business.

01:56:46.000 Everything goes awesome for five years.

01:56:49.000 We're like killing it.

01:56:51.000 We're like the hottest shit in our city.

01:56:53.000 There's a lot of new people moving in.

01:56:55.000 We have a good web presence.

01:56:56.000 So everybody's coming straight to us.

01:56:59.000 Then COVID happens and we start getting these supply chains, like product shortages.

01:57:05.000 And I start looking at like, what are we short on?

01:57:07.000 What are we not able to get?

01:57:09.000 And I go, holy shit, there's something I can make.

01:57:13.000 So I start designing this product, stuff that there's supply chain shortages on.

01:57:20.000 And I feel like it's my patriotic duty to help.

01:57:22.000 So I'm going to get out of the retail business.

01:57:24.000 I'm going to start making my own product.

01:57:27.000 And I basically get through a whole production of a whole new product.

01:57:32.000 And my business partner all of a sudden can't sell shit.

01:57:39.000 And then he resigns.

01:57:44.000 So I'm like, okay, I've got to figure this out.

01:57:48.000 I'm doing it myself.

01:57:49.000 I realize there's so little product.

01:57:52.000 This is going to be impossible to do myself.

01:57:54.000 I'm just going to focus on these new products I've been creating.

01:57:57.000 So I start building stuff and I start calling distributors in local shops.

01:58:04.000 And I start getting this response where I call a distributor and they go, look, man, I already told you you're way too expensive.

01:58:15.000 And I'm like, hold on a second.

01:58:17.000 I've never talked to you before in my life.

01:58:21.000 And I find out my business partner took my designs and ideas and found somebody else that would make them for way too much money and started going around and trying to sell them himself.

01:58:37.000 Isn't it nice you don't have to look far to find the ones that leave the deepest scar?

01:58:41.000 Oh, yeah.

01:58:43.000 Yes, because like just like you were just talking about, like one of my best friends for the last five years.

01:58:50.000 Wow.

01:58:51.000 So every time I call one of these distributors or businesses or whatever, I now have to do this thing where I'm like, look, man, he resigned August 30th.

01:59:02.000 He's not with my company.

01:59:03.000 He's not with my brand.

01:59:05.000 But now I'm fucking toxic.

01:59:09.000 It's like I walk into these places and I smell like shit.

01:59:13.000 Nobody wants to talk to me.

01:59:15.000 And I keep getting ghosted.

01:59:17.000 And he's fucking destroyed my brand.

01:59:20.000 So now I have all these great designs that I can actually come through on on good prices, but he's burnt all these bridges for me.

01:59:28.000 But can't you just change the name and say, I have this product that you said no to, but it's half the price?

01:59:36.000 Or even a third of the price?

01:59:37.000 That's what I wanted to ask you.

01:59:38.000 Should I just take this brand and just throw it in the garbage?

01:59:41.000 Yeah, it's been ruined.

01:59:43.000 It's gone.

01:59:43.000 Say goodbye.

01:59:45.000 Say goodbye.

01:59:45.000 Kill your darling.

01:59:46.000 Did I just take him on the street and sucker punch him?

01:59:50.000 Sue him?

01:59:50.000 Do I just advocate for violence on this show and jeopardize my legal standings with the American government?

02:00:00.000 But I personally would.

02:00:01.000 So I'm the creative one.

02:00:03.000 Just start a new brand, start over from scratch, and just start making it.

02:00:07.000 Yeah, and when they say, we heard about you, you're too expensive.

02:00:10.000 You go, no, no, that's a company that we saw was wasting money, and we've come up with a much more efficient way.

02:00:18.000 But also, you have to be aware that you can be fucked over at any moment.

02:00:23.000 So you have a contract.

02:00:26.000 Yeah, I had an operating agreement, but I don't have like patents on the designs and stuff.

02:00:32.000 Okay, but do you have a contract with him, like a non-compete?

02:00:36.000 I did, but he resigned.

02:00:38.000 And so in my head, I was like, well, let's just dissolve.

02:00:41.000 And then I started a new entity and moved the DBA over to my new entity.

02:00:47.000 So that shit's all gone.

02:00:50.000 Yeah, we used to have a thing that we called, I called it the crayon contract, where it was just a page.

02:00:56.000 And it was hand, it was not handwritten, but it was like one, eight and a half by 11.

02:01:00.000 You don't need like 400 pages.

02:01:01.000 And it just said, it had things like, what if I fuck your wife clause?

02:01:06.000 And what that meant was like, what if the worst possible scenario happens?

02:01:11.000 Like we all own 25%, but then I don't show up for a year at all.

02:01:15.000 So there was all these things to explain that.

02:01:18.000 Like the equity would revert to the others if you abdicated your duties and didn't show up for work and all that kind of stuff.

02:01:24.000 So you have to have a piece of paper with worst case scenarios that you've all signed.

02:01:29.000 But I understand that going to court for those kind of things can be like 40 grand sometimes and you feel like he fucked you over for 39 grand or even 50 grand so it doesn't feel like it's worth it.

02:01:41.000 So I highly recommend crayon contracts, one pagers that you've all signed.

02:01:46.000 I used to like to do blood on them.

02:01:48.000 Just sort of bite your inside lip.

02:01:50.000 Yeah, we had an operating agreement.

02:01:52.000 But I understand that that shit, that that shit isn't worth going to court for.

02:01:59.000 But I would say in this scenario, your only sort of solution here is to undercut him and go to war with him.

02:02:08.000 This guy's declared war with you.

02:02:10.000 You need to destroy him.

02:02:12.000 You need to crush him.

02:02:14.000 And maybe you go for zero profits for a while.

02:02:17.000 Maybe you undercut him to the point where you're not making any money.

02:02:21.000 You're barely staying afloat.

02:02:23.000 You fuck him over.

02:02:24.000 You crush him.

02:02:25.000 Ideally, you beat the shit out of him, but I don't think that's going to happen.

02:02:28.000 Oh, no, he's crushed.

02:02:29.000 He failed miserably.

02:02:31.000 All right.

02:02:32.000 So can your brand start from scratch and do it on the cheap?

02:02:40.000 Yeah, I can, but like I'm poisoned now.

02:02:43.000 I just told you to change everything.

02:02:46.000 Change the name.

02:02:46.000 Yeah, to create a new one.

02:02:48.000 Change your name for fuck.

02:02:49.000 Not literally change your name, but like go in there as someone else.

02:02:52.000 Find a different salesperson to go in.

02:02:54.000 Totally separate yourself from this shit smear he gave you.

02:03:00.000 Anyway, we got to go.

02:03:02.000 Yeah, thank you.

02:03:03.000 I like you more than a friend.

02:03:05.000 I thought that's a good solution, right?

02:03:07.000 Yeah.

02:03:07.000 Rebrand.

02:03:10.000 I think part of being an adult is knowing that you could get fucking stabbed in the back at any giving moment.

02:03:18.000 At any given moment.

02:03:21.000 Like, I don't think Ryan would stab me in the back, but what could he do?

02:03:26.000 I guess he could go to the press and say, I was in a horrible, racist job where I was raped every day.

02:03:32.000 I mean, that's conceivable.

02:03:36.000 Yo, you got to clean your room.

02:03:38.000 Get on top of your covers.

02:03:39.000 What the fuck?

02:03:39.000 What kind of animal is that?

02:03:42.000 All right.

02:03:43.000 Get it.

02:03:44.000 Did Coco the Gorilla fuck Jesse.

02:03:47.000 Coco the Gorilla fuck Jordan Peterson?

02:03:49.000 Clean your room and only eat meat.

02:03:52.000 If you don't know what you're doing, Jordan, I don't know what pills you replace your benzos with, but they're bad for you.

02:03:59.000 Get off whatever medication you're on right now, dude.

02:04:02.000 This is hot fire.

02:04:03.000 That meat diet is really bad for you, dude.

02:04:07.000 You gotta eat your.

02:04:08.000 Hey.

02:04:09.000 Parents said, eat your vegetables.

02:04:11.000 I say, no.

02:04:12.000 Eat a lot of meat and don't forget to clean your room.

02:04:16.000 Whoa.

02:04:19.000 All right, folks, that's enough.

02:04:20.000 We're way over the limit here at 1107.

02:04:26.000 1104, sorry.

02:04:28.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

02:04:40.000 And I'll teach you, teach you, teach you.

02:04:44.000 I'll teach you the electric spy.

02:04:50.000 Some things are nothing like you.

02:04:55.000 You can't resist me.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 15, 2021

GOML LIVE #119 - ROCK RAP

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