Gavin and Ryan are back in New York talking about Joe Biden and his new song, Desperacito by Justin Bieber. They also talk about Michelle Malkin's new book, Conspiracy Theories, and why they think Joe Biden should be the next president.
Transcript
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00:02:20.000And it's, of course, Michelle, who, by the way, has been doing this since 1990.
00:02:29.000So while most of her critics were in short pants, including Brian Stettler, the Turgid Tattletale, Michelle was blowing open all of these massive corrupt conspiracies, including Open Borders Inc., where we see big tech in cahoots with the government.
00:05:21.000Because if you could take care, if you were a quartermaster, you can sure and help take care of running a department store thing on the second floor of the ladies' department or whatever.
00:06:04.000You're in bunk five, and just organizes where you're going to sleep, where your barracks are.
00:06:08.000Put your bags down there, and then that's your fucking whatever, your trunk that you get to put your dirty socks in.
00:06:17.000So what he's saying is, military people are very capable people, and you think they're just some grunt, but they've actually been doing some complex stuff.
00:06:28.000By the way, being a quartermaster is not remotely Complicated.
00:06:33.000But then he's saying, so if you could do that, then you could work at a department store.
00:06:37.000My grandmother worked at a department store in Glasgow.
00:06:40.000And back in the, I'd say, the turn of the century, right up until the 60s, you had everyone shopped at a department store, like Macy's.
00:06:53.000And you'd get in the elevator and they'd close the steel grate.
00:06:56.000I remember going to visit my grand in Glasgow.
00:06:58.000They closed the grate and they'd have this little thing that goes and you'd go up in the elevator and they go, first floor, first floor, men's socks, fucking sports deals, all kinds of shirts and shit for men.
00:07:11.000And then they let people out and then second floor, ladies' lingerie, stockings, hairdos, lipstick, and shite like that.
00:10:26.000Anyway, the other blooper going on with Harris and the Biden campaign is her calling it the Harris-Biden Harris administration with the help of the Biden administration.
00:10:45.000See, it's funny how all these people who have been talking about how stupid Trump is for having a typo or a blooper are now in the thick of it.
00:10:53.000And we're seeing that, boy, you critics have no fucking clue how hard any of this is.
00:11:01.000What, they talk about it and they don't have the video?
00:11:29.000I think what happened there is she went to say a Biden administration or a Biden-Harris administration and she said a Harris administration.
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00:16:16.000Everyone in Manhattan wears a mask, by the way.
00:16:18.000But I sort of take it down if I'm not near anyone.
00:16:22.000I mean, the most strident rules are six feet or a mask, not necessarily both.
00:16:26.000So if I'm away from people and I see this old dude, and we're right in the Upper East Side with all the rich people, we're right at Park Avenue.
00:16:32.000We're at some of the most expensive real estate in the world.
00:16:35.000These townhouses are probably going for $25 million.
00:16:39.000And there's some rich old stockbroker.
00:18:53.000That's the second time I've gone to that restaurant and ended up with a bad scene with an old man.
00:18:59.000The other time I was with Ann Coulter, and some guy with a walker started just going, honestly, 90 years old, started going, barfing at me.
00:19:46.000And I'm thinking, okay, I assume you think I'm a Nazi or something, right?
00:19:50.000If you see the head of the Aryan Brotherhood and you're 90 years old and you use a walker, don't fuck with him.
00:19:57.000Like, if you think someone is El Chapo and you're sick of the amount of heroin that's being trafficked into the suburbs of America and how many innocent children are dying, don't confront him.
00:20:17.000I guess, should I talk about this book?
00:20:20.000Fantastic book, all about following the money, who's in cahoots, how much we're being lied to.
00:20:25.000It was done way before COVID, but it's very prescient because you see how much of what we're told, just like that Joe Biden didn't wave shit, is just lies.
00:25:42.000Yeah, you know, I was talking to a cop about body cams, and he goes, it is kind of better because you can see that they were coming at us with a knife.
00:25:48.000But the way people are framing it and using it to their advantage has kind of hurt us.
00:30:40.000There was a Canadian journalist who was so sick of people portraying Somalia as dangerous and full of rapists that she went there as like an Instagram blogger to show the world that Somalia is actually rich with culture and it's actually quite safe.
00:32:34.000If you are watching this show, you're a subscriber to Censored.tv, and you were responsible for us acquiring Puerto Rico, I want you to unsubscribe.
00:35:19.000You're listening to some like, and it's young people, 14-year-olds with like stressed denim driving in their car, just jamming out to some shitty song.
00:38:02.000Did you know Drake makes videos of himself playing basketball, but he edits out like 13 hours of missing, so it's all just slam dunks and being awesome?
00:40:51.000In 2015, the Music Mohammed purchased the two-acre property $1.7 million and hired Canadian home designer and builder Ferris Raffali to make his custom home dreams come true.
00:41:01.000In order to maintain privacy and security, the City of Toronto granted special permission last September to their hometown hero to build fences that are twice as high as their permitted height.
00:41:10.000Drake has spent more than $1 million on 20-foot-tall trees that go along the fences, so he fits in with the neighborhood, CTVN reported.
00:41:18.000As if this wasn't enough, Drake showed off.
00:41:20.000Anyway, that video, let's go back to video.
00:43:47.000The percentage of times that Justin Bieber was going to get punched in the face out of the 900,000 hours you got to hang out with some big meathead.
00:44:06.000But my manager with 20 hoes and boudicorn.
00:44:16.000That's what's hot and new in pop culture with the kids.
00:44:22.000See, I can't deep dive with any of these.
00:44:23.000I have all this BLM Antifa cop stuff, but we'll do it tomorrow.
00:44:27.000Oh, here's something important I wanted to get in.
00:49:04.000Want to sell it ourselves because we were afraid white supremacists would wear it and then what is that worth versus putting out a hate symbol?
00:49:32.000So you threw $45,000 of your own money down the toilet, but ostensibly $90,000 into the toilet because you believe some crazy left-wing bullshit about the frog being only for Nazis.
00:49:46.000Like, why are you listening to her, by the way, Matt?
00:49:49.000The implication is that, like, they'll wear these shirts and be empowered to do more evil and kill more Jews and hang more blacks in their Pepe Hawaiian shirts.
00:50:02.000Like, what fucking cartoon world do you live in?
00:50:07.000Cartoonists are so good at their job, they're now living in a cartoon.
00:51:08.000I assume the average person, like let's say you're a total Instagram addict.
00:51:13.000I assume you got another like six hours of shit you're doing, like eating and walking.
00:51:18.000So for 10 hours spread out throughout a day, you're not going to put up a picture of you and your fucking dog or you playing video games in your, I think she's still in quarantine in New York.
00:53:02.000And so some fucking rich oil baron who probably got to feel her ass paid 510 to close the gap so she could get back on.
00:53:11.000One time, this was also way back then, she got paid like, I think a million dollars to go to some fancy party in Europe run by billionaires.
00:53:54.000You look at like the 10 richest women in America, and they're all like Jeff Bezos' ex and this guy's ex.
00:54:00.000And their accomplishment was being married to a rich man.
00:54:03.000And what a lot of these women do when they're conservatives is they go and they become philanthropists.
00:54:08.000And what a lot of these right-wing guys have to do is get abused.
00:54:12.000I don't mean they like eat them out or anything, but they get sexually assaulted.
00:54:16.000They grab their ass and they have to dance with them and listen to their stories and flirt and stuff and basically not be prostitutes, but be flirts.
00:54:25.000And I was at this party and like James O'Keefe was there and Cernovich and Jim Hoft and all these guys and they're being nice to these old ladies who were really annoying.
00:54:36.000They're dressed like fucking complete whores, like stilettos like this.
00:54:39.000And one of them comes up behind me and is dancing and she puts her hands on my ass as she's dancing, which I don't really care about, right?
00:56:03.000People saying that maybe it's people saying that the virus came from China.
00:56:08.000That's what they consider like Nazi propaganda these days.
00:56:12.000Hoi Vey, I'm actually becoming like Dr. Doolittle who talks to the animals.
00:56:18.000I'm going to start wearing a pith helmet and a little safari vest as I go and try to figure out what the fuck these stupid baboons are saying.
00:56:33.000And then Sarah went on before she did that stupid Instagram strike.
00:56:38.000She was saying, we were talking about this yesterday, I believe, that what they do is they allow for these hate mongers to organize and then kill peaceful protesters.
00:56:55.000You're the one doing the killing, guys.
01:00:39.000So Americans did not, anyone remotely American or whatever you can call America European had nothing to do with slavery when we're talking about pirates.
01:00:48.000The pirates were Muslims, the barbers, who were kidnapping.
01:00:52.000Yes, they did start Arabs and Jews, started the slave trade, and Africans, sorry.
01:00:59.000But the pirates were mostly stealing whites.
01:01:02.000They were stealing white women, the barbers, and they were making them sex slaves and selling them to, you know, rich and powerful people in the Middle East.
01:01:10.000And that's why we created the Marines.
01:01:12.000The Marines were around way before America, and that was to stop them stealing these white women in the white slave trade of the Muslim pirates.
01:01:22.000Now, if you want to include blacks in that, okay.
01:01:26.000There was, what, 10 million slaves taken from Africa.
01:10:25.000This is kind of a tailor-made would you rather for Gavin, though?
01:10:31.000Would you rather do a bunch of Coke and listen to Jill Abramson explain to you the history of the Proud Boys, and every time you interrupt her, she has to restart the whole fucking thing?
01:10:43.000Or would you rather every interaction with anybody that you come across during the day starts out with them beckoning you?
01:10:53.000For folks at home who aren't aware, I don't know why.
01:10:56.000Maybe in a previous life I was raped by a guy who went like this, but this makes me steam comes out of my ears and I want to kill everyone in the room.
01:11:04.000I go Dylan Roof when people go like that.
01:14:00.000Probably my favorite part of the movie is when the Japanese first started hearing the code, you know, and they're all like, something hollow is that.
01:14:07.000You know, I can't understand any of it.
01:14:10.000Really cool part of history, I thought.
01:16:37.000Three times sitting in the fucking desert getting bit by scorpions with jihadis shooting at me.
01:16:43.000I think I've done my service for my country, and you're welcome, and I'd like a pension now, please.
01:16:49.000Yeah, you know, you'd think that would be kind of the mindset of everyone, but after the first appointment, my brothers actually missed it over there.
01:16:56.000Like, they really like the camaraderie and everything.
01:16:58.000So, yeah, it's not all horrible, I guess.
01:17:01.000Well, let's hope they don't fucking ruin that and let political correctness seep into the military.
01:18:48.000If everywhere I fucking looked, and obviously not in this climate, but say like seven months ago, if everywhere I fucking looked, it was cop this, cop that, and we're redoing the honeymooners, but now it's two cops, I would just go, oh, for fuck's sakes, can we drop the cop?
01:19:04.000And that's where we're at with this black shit.
01:20:54.000It's weird too, because driving into the city tonight, I may have mentioned this before, but I'm looking at all these billboards and like, fucking every billboard is a little black astronaut girl who's, you know, they're redoing bad boys,
01:31:12.000Like, at the beginning of the book, it talks about, I think it was sedition where everyone thinks that you can't talk shit about, you know, you can talk shit about the president and stuff like that.
01:31:22.000But it wasn't like that when the you know, when the country first was started for like 70 years or some shit like that.
01:32:09.000Yeah, I mean, I obviously don't advocate violence and murdering innocent people, but every successful political movement in the past has done that.
01:32:19.000And the ones who haven't haven't been effective.
01:39:12.000He left a voicemail talking about how Chauncey, this writer, shouldn't publish this thing about one of these models saying that, yada, yada, talking about him.
01:39:23.000No, the story was that a penthouse model was saying that she was working for Trump for Miss America, and he would only ever hire a Playboy model.
01:39:31.000And he was so disgusted by the rumor that he goes, what am I?
01:40:43.000I remember one time we were in Austin, Texas, at South by Southwest, and I was with all Texans, and they were telling some story, and in the story, the N-word was in it, but it wasn't derogatory.
01:40:56.000It was like, so this guy comes out, and he was saying nagger, but everyone thought he was saying nigger.
01:42:55.000I saw the thing she put up where she was talking about, and I think it was Sargon of Akkad who put this up, or maybe it was Milo, where she says she had been invited to a barbecue, and she thought it might have been a black person barbecue as she approached because there was a bunch of black people at a barbecue.
01:43:17.000And then as she got closer, she realized that, oh no, it's actually the white people next to them.
01:44:52.000Why are they writing movies for the rest of us?
01:44:57.000Yeah, because they always pretend that they know how regular people are, and then it's just so obvious that they have no idea.
01:45:04.000They should just have to live with a middle American family of ranchers for like just a month or two, just so you can get the vernacular and the habits down.
01:45:15.000Again, I always wonder, too, do they have to teach the actors how to use the chopsticks sometimes?
01:45:37.000When you get to the bottom of a bowl and it's like kind of soupy or something, you take the sticks and you just sort of hold the bowl up and you scoop it into your mouth.
01:45:45.000In other words, what you would do with like a pencil or something, or if you were fucking Tom Hanks and Castaway.
01:51:25.000The planet long overlooked in the search for extraterrestrial life.
01:51:29.000Well, if scientists say they found life in the esoteric acid clouds of Venus, that must be true.
01:51:35.000Just like in 1907 when the New York Times reported that Martians are probably superior to us, and they were photographed by a scientist in a white lab coat, so it must be true.
01:51:46.000And then again in 1909, the New York Times reported that astronomers say that the Martian canals are for drainage.
01:51:53.000Germans said they're there to prevent floods when the pole caps melt.
01:51:57.000And in 1911, the New York Times reported, Martians built two immense canals in two years.
01:52:03.000Vast engineering work accomplished in an incredibly short time by our planetary neighbors.
01:52:11.000And the New York Times had a nice picture of a scientist and very detailed maps of the canals on Mars, which were built by our superior Martian neighbors.
01:52:20.000And 90 years later, scientists at NASA were still sticking to their life on Mars claim, even though they didn't have any actual evidence.
01:52:28.000Let's look at some other in the New York Times.
01:53:43.000They're talking about the importance of primaries and stuff like that.
01:53:46.000And I chime in and I say, well, isn't the general election really the most important thing at the end of the day?
01:53:52.000Because that's going to determine who the actual winner is.
01:53:59.000And this other kid who was talking quite a bit in the class, who I guess is kind of like a Marxist, because then they start talking about the importance of primaries.
01:54:10.000And he jumps in and he goes, yeah, well, you know, it's really a rough system with the primaries.
01:54:41.000And I just laughed at him, started bagging up.
01:54:44.000And, you know, I was going to get into your thing about how she was in the Uber and, you know, with the Muslim driver who, you know, obviously was prejudiced toward her and a friend.
01:55:07.000You know, and I bet if you gave him all the facts, he'd still say that because to be a white, to criticize Muslims or any non-white people means that you think whites are better and therefore you're a white supremacist.
01:55:21.000So if you don't like Bill Cosby raping people, you're a white supremacist.
01:55:25.000If you don't like George Floyd beating the shit, pistol whipping a pregnant woman and forcing her into her home so he could rob her, you're a white supremacist.
01:55:34.000How about I'm just allowed to criticize people who kick me out of their fucking Uber because I was mentioning a Jewish holiday?
01:55:42.000Yeah, it's like, is Ben Shapiro a white supremacist?
01:55:45.000You know, is, you know, how can a Jewish person, I don't know, it's a bit of a, definitely a bit of a nonsensical argument, as I find it.
01:56:10.000I guess they arrested Steve Bannon and stuff like that.
01:56:12.000And I saw that I was reading the Snopes article, and it was saying how I guess the other veteran who was arrested, he was saying they were going to give the money to the treasury, you know, to give it to the government to pay for the wall, right?
01:56:27.000And I guess it was several million dollars.
01:56:30.000And the Snopes article said that's not actually possible.
01:56:33.000And then it does this thing where, you know, it's like gives a hyperlink to another article.
01:58:41.000You also cut it up by, I think, the liberal population, too.
01:58:44.000You said, like, you were trying to kind of get at, I feel like, before you went into the whole, you know, what percentage of the right is what.
01:58:51.000Maybe it was on a few days ago episode, but you were also talking about, okay, what percentage of left-wing or, you know, people are actually malicious?
01:59:00.000You know, Marx talked about useful idiots.
01:59:02.000You know, what percentage are actually just being brainwashed?
01:59:34.000Or do you know that when you say that, most people won't look it up and it'll seem, it'll get legs and you'll be the guy who is standing up for women?
01:59:44.000It's like the North Koreans when the previous guy died and they're sitting there crying and I'm staring at the cement below them and noticing that actual tears are coming out of their eyes.
02:02:43.000Yeah, I have to bring when I watch most of these World War II movies, I have to bring a bottle of Gatorade because I get dehydrated from bawling.
02:08:00.000And he talks to me like we're robbing a bank tomorrow, and this is his first bank robbery, and I've sussed it out, and I've done a lot of bank robberies, but he's nervous, and he's just like saying, hey, Gavin, Gavin, so we're doing this?
02:08:12.000We're going to really, like, we're going to rob the bank, and there's going to be a car waiting outside.