Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - May 12, 2019


S02E05 - GAY BAR FIGHTS


Episode Stats

Length

49 minutes

Words per Minute

161.23088

Word Count

7,903

Sentence Count

869

Misogynist Sentences

41

Hate Speech Sentences

81


Summary

In this episode, the boys talk about fake news, superhero cosplay, and the new Avengers movie. They also talk about the new Black Panther movie, and why they don t like it. Also, they talk about why they think Kylie Jenner is a bad person.


Transcript

00:00:40.000 She might have left my hood, but she was born in my town.
00:00:42.000 Boom!
00:00:43.000 Here comes the boom!
00:00:44.000 Ready or not?
00:00:46.000 Here comes the boys from the south.
00:00:49.000 That video sucks.
00:00:51.000 That's POD.
00:00:52.000 They're a Christian band, but they don't say that because it's bad for business.
00:00:57.000 But they're pro-life and against gay marriage and all that wonderful Christian stuff.
00:01:03.000 Against mass shootings.
00:01:05.000 What is POD?
00:01:06.000 Point of deliverance or something?
00:01:08.000 That's what it stands for?
00:01:10.000 Yeah, I'm looking it up right now.
00:01:11.000 I can't see it yet.
00:01:15.000 I did that song at karaoke last night and absolutely destroyed, but I got winded because I was jumping and landing and boom and screaming like a punk rocker.
00:01:26.000 And I think it might be Ryan's constant sucking of the plastic dick.
00:01:33.000 Ryan is a vapor, and I'm not a smoker.
00:01:36.000 I do get asthma.
00:01:37.000 I'm allergic to mice because they have little dust on them.
00:01:41.000 And I think sitting next to a vapor is making me sick.
00:01:44.000 I'm a vapist.
00:01:48.000 You're a serial vapist.
00:01:49.000 I'm not a vapor.
00:01:51.000 This shirt is too long for this jacket.
00:01:56.000 Maybe if I go like that a little bit, bunch it up a little.
00:02:01.000 Yeah, I was thinking about the length of the show.
00:02:04.000 We're still experimenting.
00:02:05.000 These are the early shows going back and forth.
00:02:07.000 And sometimes 43 minutes seems a little short.
00:02:10.000 It's the normal length for a television show.
00:02:12.000 That's why we chose it.
00:02:12.000 And I know when I watch Tucker Carlson, I fast forward through the commercials.
00:02:16.000 I watch it late.
00:02:17.000 And that's 43 minutes.
00:02:18.000 That's a reasonable amount of time to watch a show.
00:02:21.000 Like, should you be watching two hours of anything every day?
00:02:24.000 But then you think, there are these guys who work in their shops and they like to have it on in the background.
00:02:32.000 So that's 43 minutes is very short then for that.
00:02:36.000 We'll figure it out soon, folks.
00:02:38.000 But we're working on this together.
00:02:43.000 Before we get started, I want to sort of dedicate a lot of this show to fake news and the way the narrative changes.
00:02:50.000 But before we get into that, I just want to say how much I hate superheroes.
00:02:55.000 I don't mind that little kids are into it, but cosplay drives me nuts, and seeing grown men with superheroes on their shirt is just pathetic, as my dad would say.
00:03:06.000 Absolutely pathetic.
00:03:10.000 For the 50th time, we invented superheroes because we felt bad for nerds.
00:03:18.000 Because back in the 40s, 50s, there was the old-fashioned bullies punching their hands, beating up for your lunch money.
00:03:25.000 And if you weren't strong, you're getting your ass kicked.
00:03:27.000 And we pushed for strong men in the world.
00:03:30.000 We'd just come through World War II.
00:03:33.000 And we thought, let's help these kids out.
00:03:36.000 Or at least the free market decided to help these kids out.
00:03:39.000 So they gave little kids a fantasy.
00:03:41.000 And that fantasy is that that guy did beat you up, but you have a secret power.
00:03:47.000 And you could come to school if you wanted to and shoot webs at them and fly over their heads and punch them.
00:03:53.000 And then you'd go save a bankrob.
00:03:54.000 You'd save an old lady like your mom.
00:03:56.000 You'd save her.
00:03:58.000 That's a silly fantasy to make a little kid feel better.
00:04:03.000 But when an adult has a Superman shirt, or even one of the coaches at my gym, he has on a fucking Superman body here and the neck ends there.
00:04:13.000 So his head is Superman.
00:04:15.000 Grown man, wife, kids.
00:04:18.000 What are you doing?
00:04:19.000 Superman?
00:04:20.000 Even within the superhero world, that's severely gay.
00:04:26.000 But look at these pictures.
00:04:27.000 This is old news to you now of Avengers Endgame.
00:04:30.000 But they got that black rapper.
00:04:32.000 What's his name?
00:04:33.000 Traphead?
00:04:34.000 Trap?
00:04:35.000 Tyrus?
00:04:36.000 Tyrus Traphead.
00:04:37.000 Tyrus Traphead.
00:04:39.000 And one of the Jenners, Caitlin Jenner.
00:04:43.000 Travis Scott?
00:04:45.000 Yeah.
00:04:45.000 Okay.
00:04:46.000 Is that Kylie Jenner?
00:04:47.000 It's definitely not Caitlin Jenner.
00:04:49.000 That's a really good.
00:04:50.000 Dressing up to go see Avengers, sitting on their Ferrari.
00:04:54.000 And then what's this next one?
00:04:55.000 That's not so bad.
00:04:57.000 You're dressing up for your little kid.
00:05:00.000 Like, I actually wore a Captain America shirt once, but it was because my son was really into him, and I was making him happy, and he was four.
00:05:09.000 I don't think I'm Captain America.
00:05:12.000 No, I just really like Wolverine.
00:05:14.000 God, the way they talk about these superhero movies and the plots and they line up to be Black Panther.
00:05:19.000 Remember that whole Wakanda shit?
00:05:22.000 Wakanda sucks, by the way.
00:05:24.000 Wakanda is a mediocre little village.
00:05:27.000 It's not that impressive, and they have a magical substance that's better than diamonds and oil and better than any substance anyone's ever heard of.
00:05:34.000 And you still don't really have any skyscrapers or very impressive infrastructure.
00:05:39.000 Like downtown Wakanda, when they're walking around, Black Panther's walking around with his friends, it looks like Kenya.
00:05:45.000 Just like a shiny Kenya.
00:05:46.000 No, it's not that shiny.
00:05:48.000 There's little dirt roads and stuff.
00:05:50.000 It sucks.
00:05:51.000 Look at that tub.
00:05:54.000 That is in the dictionary under pathetic.
00:05:58.000 What's the guy with the little boots?
00:06:00.000 Oh, he's Ant-Man.
00:06:01.000 No, no, no.
00:06:02.000 He's one of the guardians of the galaxy.
00:06:05.000 I don't know what his name is.
00:06:06.000 Oh, he's the guy that...
00:06:09.000 He's Chris Pratt in Guardians of the Galaxy.
00:06:11.000 And look, what's the guy with the backpack?
00:06:13.000 What's in his backpack?
00:06:14.000 His pants?
00:06:16.000 Spider-Man's backpack?
00:06:16.000 Yeah, so we can put them on later.
00:06:18.000 I don't know.
00:06:19.000 It's probably some spider stuff.
00:06:21.000 Look at that.
00:06:23.000 I'm a badass.
00:06:25.000 I'm Captain Marvel.
00:06:27.000 I'm not a fat chick.
00:06:29.000 I'm a superhero.
00:06:32.000 I'm badass.
00:06:35.000 Oh, Lord.
00:06:37.000 It's the same three people.
00:06:41.000 Look at these adults dressing up.
00:06:41.000 Look at that.
00:06:44.000 Now, I know what you're saying, Ryan.
00:06:46.000 You're saying, what about Halloween?
00:06:47.000 You like Halloween.
00:06:48.000 That's dressing up.
00:06:49.000 Yeah.
00:06:49.000 And Halloween was made for kids.
00:06:51.000 And it's adults doing a kid thing.
00:06:56.000 No, that's not the case at all.
00:06:58.000 Can you switch this camera thingy around?
00:07:01.000 Okay.
00:07:02.000 Halloween predates Christianity.
00:07:04.000 It was a ceremony, a magical night.
00:07:07.000 Whoa, those are some bazooms.
00:07:12.000 You know what's funny?
00:07:13.000 I'm such a pig.
00:07:15.000 I'm such a pervert that my mind just changed and said, well, maybe it's not that bad.
00:07:21.000 I'm not kidding, though.
00:07:23.000 Oh, yeah, there's a really bad one coming up.
00:07:26.000 Keep going.
00:07:29.000 We like her.
00:07:29.000 She's in our 25 hottest list.
00:07:31.000 Well, this isn't her.
00:07:32.000 This is just a nerd.
00:07:33.000 Thank you.
00:07:33.000 Thank you.
00:07:34.000 I thought that was Kate Blanchett cosplaying for free as opposed to the $5 million she probably got to do that.
00:07:41.000 Keep going, keep going, keep going.
00:07:42.000 I don't care about that.
00:07:44.000 What's she saying?
00:07:45.000 Something super nerdy, I bet.
00:07:46.000 Let's hear how nerds talk.
00:07:47.000 Let's hear how nerds talk.
00:07:53.000 Let's see.
00:07:57.000 No matter what the end game, eventually they all come back to me.
00:08:04.000 So, see you in Hella Venters.
00:08:08.000 Ew.
00:08:10.000 Ew!
00:08:12.000 What are you doing?
00:08:13.000 You're having a kid's fantasy.
00:08:16.000 Did she just give away the ending too?
00:08:18.000 Eventually, they all come back to me.
00:08:23.000 Alright, we're back.
00:08:25.000 You push the Skype button and not realize?
00:08:27.000 Yeah.
00:08:29.000 Okay, keep going.
00:08:30.000 I'm sick of her.
00:08:31.000 That is the best.
00:08:33.000 No way.
00:08:35.000 If that person's kidding, she's hilarious.
00:08:40.000 If she's not kidding, she should be committed.
00:08:43.000 Dude.
00:08:44.000 That's either the best or the worst chick in the world.
00:08:46.000 Dude, wow.
00:08:48.000 Wow.
00:08:48.000 Look at that little glove.
00:08:49.000 I looked into it.
00:08:50.000 But yeah, Halloween was a pagan tradition.
00:08:54.000 It predates Christianity, and it's when all the villagers would get together and have skull masks and stuff, and they would laugh in the face of death.
00:09:02.000 They're playing a game saying, ha ha ha, we're not scared of you, death.
00:09:05.000 It's like the Mexican Night of the Dead thing.
00:09:07.000 Same shit.
00:09:09.000 And it's continued over the years.
00:09:11.000 So you're really tipping your hat to the tradition.
00:09:13.000 The kids with the candy is relatively new.
00:09:16.000 And we don't go door to door and we make it sexual.
00:09:20.000 I like Halloween.
00:09:20.000 It's totally different from this.
00:09:23.000 This is you living out a seven-year-old nerd's fantasies.
00:09:26.000 Halloween looks similar, but it's totally different.
00:09:31.000 All right.
00:09:32.000 Remember that teacher?
00:09:34.000 What teacher?
00:09:36.000 They posted this to not spoil the endgame?
00:09:39.000 Yeah, that's actually a perfect example of what I'm talking about.
00:09:43.000 My little brother is on a Tamoa business trip, and I'm waiting until he gets back to see The Avengers, what will be Wednesday night.
00:09:49.000 Do not discuss anything about it anywhere near this classroom until this time.
00:09:53.000 You know how much I love Marvel Comics.
00:09:55.000 There.
00:09:56.000 That sentence in a nutshell is what I'm talking about.
00:09:58.000 Help me, Jeebus.
00:09:59.000 It's the infantilization of adults.
00:10:03.000 And it shows, basically, that hard times create weak men.
00:10:08.000 No, hard times create strong men.
00:10:10.000 Strong men create good times.
00:10:12.000 Good times create weak men.
00:10:13.000 We're in a good time.
00:10:15.000 So I guess it's actually good news that we are having all of these wrinkled teenagers, not even teenagers.
00:10:24.000 Like, they don't even move out of their house anymore.
00:10:26.000 You haven't moved out of your house.
00:10:27.000 You have an apartment that you can live in.
00:10:29.000 And the second you can escape back to your Nana's big tits, you jump on the train and go back to her bosom.
00:10:36.000 I like it that I got a car there.
00:10:39.000 I can drive around.
00:10:40.000 29 years old, folks.
00:10:41.000 He's 29 years old, and he cannot move out of the house.
00:10:45.000 Oh, you're 30 now?
00:10:45.000 I've turned 30.
00:10:46.000 You've since turned 30.
00:10:48.000 I moved out of the house when I was 18.
00:10:51.000 I moved to New York City when I was 30 because I had already started a massive global media empire.
00:10:57.000 Some people like it hot.
00:11:00.000 Maybe one of the reasons you haven't moved out is that you don't work.
00:11:03.000 Your brain is broken and you can't even speak English.
00:11:06.000 Some like it hot.
00:11:07.000 What's hot?
00:11:09.000 Playing video games in your basement?
00:11:12.000 Jack Lemmon, Walter Matham, and Marilyn Monroe.
00:11:15.000 Oh, so he just names old movies now when you criticize him.
00:11:19.000 All right.
00:11:19.000 I want to talk about something very big here.
00:11:22.000 And it goes back to this shooting and the way it's portrayed in the news because I'm seeing a pattern here.
00:11:27.000 And the pattern is there is a desperate attempt to prove we are white nationalists.
00:11:39.000 Ready?
00:11:41.000 Maybe we should cut to a swipe?
00:11:43.000 A bumper?
00:11:44.000 You want to bump it?
00:11:45.000 Yeah, because I might want to make this free.
00:11:47.000 All right, bump it up.
00:11:49.000 All right.
00:11:54.000 Okay, we got a doozy here.
00:11:58.000 I've been noticing this pattern.
00:12:01.000 And I know you're not supposed to notice patterns.
00:12:03.000 That's what political correctness is, ignoring patterns.
00:12:06.000 But I'm noticing a pattern here, and it is this desperate need to prove that America is Nazi central.
00:12:12.000 And I'd like to draw an analogy, if I may.
00:12:16.000 It is exactly like if the media was determined to warn you and prove that gays are dominating bar fights across the country.
00:12:31.000 Now, this is a good analogy because gays are not dominating bar fights across the country.
00:12:39.000 Ooh, you got to dig up that video, remember?
00:12:42.000 In the alleyway of those two girls fighting some gays.
00:12:47.000 Oh, that's right.
00:12:47.000 Sharts.
00:12:48.000 Okay.
00:12:49.000 But that's okay.
00:12:49.000 We got time.
00:12:51.000 That's how we work here, Ryan.
00:12:52.000 You dig up stuff.
00:12:53.000 Not everything has to be pre-calibrated.
00:12:56.000 That's what's ups.
00:12:57.000 That is what's up.
00:12:59.000 I love that.
00:13:02.000 So, gays are not a big part of bar fights.
00:13:05.000 And a bigger picture, and another reason I love this brilliant analogy is gays aren't really bar fight types.
00:13:12.000 We're more bar fight types.
00:13:14.000 Us Scotch-Irish.
00:13:16.000 There, this is gays.
00:13:17.000 They're alleyway.
00:13:18.000 Barfighting.
00:13:18.000 No, not really.
00:13:22.000 That was such a move.
00:13:23.000 And then he's like, talk to the hand because you ain't got no man.
00:13:26.000 That's what you get, girl.
00:13:27.000 That's what you get.
00:13:29.000 You start shit with us.
00:13:32.000 No, you're not.
00:13:33.000 Get off of me.
00:13:33.000 Ow.
00:13:35.000 Get her off.
00:13:36.000 I'm going to hit you.
00:13:37.000 Ow.
00:13:37.000 Both of you get off of me.
00:13:39.000 Bang.
00:13:40.000 Ow.
00:13:41.000 That hurt.
00:13:42.000 Get him.
00:13:43.000 You bitches.
00:13:44.000 They've been partying all night.
00:13:47.000 The homeless guy.
00:13:48.000 Look at the homeless guy.
00:13:48.000 He's just like, what the fuck are you doing in my house?
00:13:51.000 He's like, this is the best live show I've ever seen.
00:13:55.000 Brah fucking vo.
00:13:57.000 Got quarters?
00:13:58.000 Okay, enough with the bad words.
00:14:01.000 Anyway, yeah.
00:14:03.000 So I'm looking at this, and it's mostly determination to attack white males, Christians, you know, a certain type of white male Christian.
00:14:12.000 But a number of examples of this in forced narrative are worth just going over briefly.
00:14:19.000 Because you can learn a lot about a society from what they don't say.
00:14:24.000 Yes, the fake news says a lot of things that are corrupt and wrong, but they also leave out a lot of things that are very telling.
00:14:35.000 So for example, remember there was that guy, it was right after Christ Church and synagogue shooting, the one in Paloma, California, I believe, where that one woman took a bullet for the rabbi?
00:14:46.000 So this guy comes out, he's in the post, and he said he was going to kill Jews and Christians.
00:14:56.000 He's a Muslim convert who looks like he's from Trailer Park Boys.
00:15:00.000 Yeah, Corey from Trailer Park Boys.
00:15:02.000 from Trailer Park Boys.
00:15:03.000 Now, authorities thwart widespread terror plot involving...
00:15:10.000 Involving U.S. military veteran.
00:15:12.000 I do not like the word thwart, by the way.
00:15:15.000 Thwart.
00:15:16.000 Why are you thwarting this plot?
00:15:18.000 Anyway, the article is interesting because if you scroll down, they list, no, not too far down, not to the ads.
00:15:26.000 They said that he wanted to kill Jews and Christians in retaliation for the attack, and they leave out a pretty major detail.
00:15:35.000 Wait, America needs another Vegas event.
00:15:38.000 Domenico said in an online video professing his Muslim faith and affidavit unsealed Monday states.
00:15:42.000 He was referring to the October shootings in Vegas.
00:15:45.000 Another attack would give them a taste of the terror they gladly spread all over the world.
00:15:51.000 Minor detail, he also said he was going to kill white nationalists.
00:15:56.000 So the New York Post, you can't always trust, doesn't want to show you that this guy is a complete nut and that white nationalists and Jews and Christians are all part of the same thing.
00:16:07.000 Oh, wait, this has been updated, and it actually does have white nationalists.
00:16:12.000 He says, well, tell me if I'm wrong.
00:16:14.000 Holy crap, that wasn't in there before.
00:16:16.000 He says, in order to commit mass murder at a planned white nationalist rally.
00:16:20.000 That wasn't there before.
00:16:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:16:21.000 This is another thing that annoys me, too, about modern media.
00:16:24.000 Updated.
00:16:25.000 I'm positive that was not there.
00:16:27.000 Oh, there's the updated.
00:16:28.000 Right.
00:16:28.000 Yeah, you can't just write updated.
00:16:30.000 You have to put it at the bottom and go, an earlier version of this article left out white nationalists.
00:16:35.000 Sure, sure.
00:16:35.000 Dang.
00:16:36.000 He's a complete lunatic nut bar who wanted to kill a wide swath of people.
00:16:40.000 But that doesn't fit the narrative.
00:16:42.000 It doesn't fit the narrative to say white nationalists and Jews are under attack.
00:16:46.000 That's not sexy.
00:16:47.000 And it reminds me of the whole Easter worshiper thing.
00:16:51.000 This was when there was the bombing in Sri Lanka and everyone came out.
00:16:55.000 Barack Obama, find his tweet and Hillary's tweet, and they kept talking about Easter worshipers.
00:17:00.000 One of the most annoying terms.
00:17:02.000 Actually, that article, right?
00:17:03.000 No, keep going down, is saying that we should shut up about it.
00:17:06.000 No, I'm not shutting up about it.
00:17:08.000 I think it's a big deal.
00:17:09.000 Easter worshipers.
00:17:10.000 Barack Obama refuses to say Christians, refuses to say Catholics.
00:17:16.000 He just calls them Easter worshipers.
00:17:18.000 And so does Hillary, and so did everyone.
00:17:22.000 But look how quickly we go from Easter worshiper to Christian.
00:17:26.000 It happens overnight.
00:17:29.000 Easter worshipers became Christians pretty fast, didn't they?
00:17:32.000 In the New York Times, mobs of Christian men in Sri Lanka have been threatening and beating Muslims, dozens of residents said.
00:17:38.000 They even beat my kids, said a Pakistani refugee who has lived in Sri Lanka for two years.
00:17:43.000 Why are you a, wait a minute, you're a Muslim Pakistani and you had to leave Pakistan because you're a refugee?
00:17:49.000 A refugee is someone who will be killed if they go back home because of their beliefs.
00:17:53.000 Pakistan's a Muslim country.
00:17:55.000 You get to be a refugee now just if your country sucks, if you ruined it?
00:17:59.000 We gave, we said, look, Muslims, this is enough.
00:18:01.000 Here's the top of India.
00:18:03.000 That's yours.
00:18:03.000 That's Pakistan.
00:18:05.000 I need to leave.
00:18:07.000 I am a refugee.
00:18:10.000 So they like the narrative when it's Christians terrorizing everyone, but they don't like the narratives when Christians are the victims.
00:18:17.000 And I don't want to make this a white thing.
00:18:19.000 It's a Christian Western thing.
00:18:21.000 And the impetus behind it is Christian men, white men, Westerner men, American men, are very violent and evil and racist and dark.
00:18:35.000 So if there's an attack, we have to make sure we don't get them riled up because they're a bunch of yokel rednecks who will put on their Klansmen uniforms and just start shooting up the place.
00:18:45.000 And I'm here to tell you that we are the group least likely to do that.
00:18:50.000 We are the biggest sweeties in the world.
00:18:54.000 That's what I'm screaming.
00:18:55.000 That's why I love this gay barfight analogy.
00:18:58.000 That's us.
00:19:01.000 Sure, it happens.
00:19:02.000 It's happened once.
00:19:04.000 We're clearly not in our element here.
00:19:07.000 And when it happens, it's pretty bad.
00:19:11.000 No one really gets that hurt, by the way.
00:19:12.000 You'll notice everyone's still standing.
00:19:14.000 In the gay barfight analogy, yes.
00:19:20.000 And we saw this with a synagogue shooting where they had to point out that it was a Christian.
00:19:26.000 It wasn't one Jewish, one Christian, how the California synagogue shooting Tore apart two congregations.
00:19:32.000 Why do you need to mention that he's Christian in this when discussing this shooting?
00:19:37.000 Why isn't he an Easter worshiper?
00:19:39.000 Or why, in the case of the New York Post, unupdated article, why include it at all?
00:19:46.000 Because the narrative has to be that America is Nazi central.
00:19:49.000 America is the least Nazi central place ever.
00:19:51.000 Ever.
00:19:54.000 Now, here's an example of backlash.
00:19:56.000 There was an incident, it was a long-ass time ago, 2002, and it was in Korea.
00:20:02.000 You probably haven't heard of it.
00:20:04.000 I don't know what the hell we're doing in South Korea.
00:20:06.000 I guess we're getting ready for North Korea, right?
00:20:07.000 So we have a bunch of troops there, and they're on these shitty little Korean roads that are this wide.
00:20:13.000 These guys are carrying these, do you have the article there?
00:20:15.000 They're carrying these insane giant tanks.
00:20:18.000 Is that this?
00:20:18.000 No, no, no.
00:20:19.000 Muslim vanishes.
00:20:22.000 Let's leave up that.
00:20:23.000 We'll use your mistake.
00:20:24.000 We'll roll with this punch.
00:20:26.000 Myanmar, what's that?
00:20:28.000 In Indonesia?
00:20:29.000 Myanmar?
00:20:30.000 I don't know.
00:20:30.000 Of course, you don't know.
00:20:33.000 So these Muslims vanish as Buddhists attack, right?
00:20:36.000 The Buddhists were attacking because the Muslims had terrorized their villages.
00:20:41.000 So the Buddhists have said that's it.
00:20:43.000 And there's sort of a reenactment of the Crusades going on in Myanmar or wherever that is.
00:20:49.000 Who cares?
00:20:52.000 Where Buddhists are slaughtering Muslims because the Muslims slaughtered them.
00:20:56.000 That's backlash.
00:20:57.000 You see?
00:20:59.000 That's a backlash group is Buddhists.
00:21:02.000 You should be worried about a Buddhist freaking out and attacking Muslims.
00:21:07.000 You don't have to worry about us.
00:21:08.000 But anyway.
00:21:09.000 There's Myanmar.
00:21:10.000 It looks like a shit hole country.
00:21:17.000 Myanmar.
00:21:20.000 Diarrhea splat.
00:21:22.000 Oh, diarrhea splat are playing at Mercury Lounge if you want to.
00:21:24.000 Yes.
00:21:25.000 The basist is a junkie, though.
00:21:26.000 So he said he can get his tickets, but not reliable.
00:21:30.000 They never are the basists.
00:21:33.000 So find the Korean one, Rock Drop, link.
00:21:36.000 So this guy, it's a really long story.
00:21:39.000 I won't bore you with the details, but basically, some enormous tank-like thing was carrying some supplies up a tiny road, didn't see these two Korean girls, and ran them over.
00:21:49.000 Smushed them with a tank.
00:21:51.000 Korea was pissed.
00:21:54.000 And for years.
00:21:58.000 Yeah.
00:21:59.000 And look, it was an obvious accident.
00:22:02.000 The idea that Americans are just driving through the small town going, hey, there's a little girl.
00:22:08.000 Did you see her gut shoot out?
00:22:10.000 It was like squitching a bug, boys.
00:22:12.000 Obviously, the soldiers were mortified and investigated.
00:22:15.000 I don't know what happened to them.
00:22:16.000 But Korea went on this anti-American thing for years.
00:22:21.000 And you know who was a really big part of it?
00:22:25.000 Sai.
00:22:27.000 Gang Gang Dance.
00:22:28.000 What's it?
00:22:28.000 Gangnim Dance?
00:22:29.000 Gangnim style.
00:22:30.000 Yeah, Gang Gang Dance are a cool band from New York.
00:22:34.000 The Gangnim guy, Sai, back in 2004, kill those effing Yankees who have been torturing Iraqi captives.
00:22:42.000 What?
00:22:42.000 You're all worried about Iraqis now?
00:22:44.000 Kill those effing Yankees who order them to torture.
00:22:47.000 Kill their daughters, mothers, daughters-in-law.
00:22:53.000 Kill their daughters-in-law.
00:22:55.000 Isn't that just someone else's daughter?
00:22:57.000 I think that's covered with daughter.
00:23:00.000 And fathers.
00:23:00.000 Kill them all slowly and painfully.
00:23:04.000 That is the anti-American Korean backlash from a 2002 incident drifting on two more years later into 2004.
00:23:14.000 Real quick, it says the song actually isn't Sai's.
00:23:16.000 It's by a South Korean metal band called NAXT, which performed the song along with Psy and several others at a 2004 concert meant to protest the Iraqi.
00:23:25.000 I would list that clarification as irrelevant, but thank you.
00:23:29.000 But show the video.
00:23:30.000 There's really low-res footage of it.
00:23:33.000 Wasn't he the most, isn't Gangnam Dance the most watched thing ever?
00:23:37.000 It's one of them.
00:23:38.000 Look at that.
00:23:39.000 There's Psy.
00:23:42.000 So just go back a little bit there.
00:23:44.000 Because it was the tank that accidentally killed the girls.
00:23:47.000 And for years later, all they talk about is how much America, the fucking Yankees.
00:23:52.000 And he's there singing the medal song about how much we suck.
00:23:58.000 And he grabs a tank and comes out with the tank.
00:24:01.000 That's the American soldiers that, sorry, had an accident.
00:24:05.000 Destroy the tank.
00:24:06.000 Kill all Yankees.
00:24:08.000 Everyone's cheering.
00:24:08.000 Kill the Americans.
00:24:10.000 Yay!
00:24:11.000 Can you imagine if there was an incident where Koreans accidentally ran over someone and there was a big concert where Americans are going, kill the Koreans!
00:24:19.000 Kill the Koreans!
00:24:20.000 Smashing the tank down and everyone cheering.
00:24:23.000 Wasn't that guy wearing a tuxedo?
00:24:24.000 He looked pretty mainstream.
00:24:26.000 It was a very mainstream notion.
00:24:28.000 In fact, if I do recall, if I do declare, Jimmy Kimmel had a thing on his show with little girls, little kids, and he was asking them serious policy issues.
00:24:39.000 And one of them was, you know, China's loaned us a lot of money.
00:24:43.000 And economically, we're so deep into debt with them that our debts are not repayable.
00:24:49.000 I don't know if we can ever make this money back.
00:24:51.000 And he's asking the kids, is this it?
00:24:54.000 $10 billion.
00:24:55.000 How should we pay them back?
00:24:57.000 Huccaney and God the way America kill everyone in China.
00:25:00.000 Kill everyone in China.
00:25:01.000 Yeah.
00:25:02.000 Okay, that's an interesting idea.
00:25:03.000 All right.
00:25:04.000 So that's a little kid making a stupid joke, and Jimmy Kimmel's laughing afterwards to make it clear there's a joke.
00:25:10.000 Huge backlash against Kimmel.
00:25:13.000 Huge.
00:25:14.000 He apologized at five separate occasions, I believe.
00:25:17.000 And they blurted out the face of the kids.
00:25:19.000 They blurt out the face of the kids.
00:25:20.000 The kid's going to get beat up.
00:25:22.000 Yeah, he had to apologize outside the studio.
00:25:24.000 He made a formal statement on his show.
00:25:25.000 I guess that's only two.
00:25:27.000 But it is the same old story again and again.
00:25:30.000 Koreans smash tanks and say, kill all the Yankees' daughters-in-law.
00:25:35.000 And we make a little kid makes a silly joke, and there's protests.
00:25:40.000 It was like, boycott Jimmy Kimmel forever.
00:25:42.000 And I'm also want to, I want to link this Virginia Tech shooting.
00:25:45.000 Remember the Virginia Tech shooting?
00:25:47.000 Yeah.
00:25:48.000 He was a Korean gentleman.
00:25:51.000 Was he a Marine or am I confusing him with that other weirdo?
00:25:54.000 He was probably not getting laid or something.
00:25:56.000 And he was 23-year-old Sing Huai Cho, Killed 32 people.
00:26:01.000 Holy crap, I forgot it was that many.
00:26:03.000 It was pretty big on the Polytechnique Institute State University campus before taking his own life.
00:26:08.000 Again, folks, mass shootings are almost never political.
00:26:13.000 Okay?
00:26:13.000 Nine times out of ten, it's a suicidal person who wants to maximize the damage and go out in a real bang.
00:26:21.000 That's why they would do something as horrific as Sandy Hook because it'll be the most media attention.
00:26:25.000 I'm going out with the biggest splash.
00:26:29.000 Out of, I think 5%, something like 95% of the time, that's what it is.
00:26:33.000 About 5% of the time, it's political.
00:26:36.000 Within that 5, maybe 1% of the time, it's a Christian.
00:26:39.000 4% of that time, it's a jihadist.
00:26:43.000 And of course, you can think of the Pulse shooting and the West Side Highway and San Bernardino and et cetera, et cetera.
00:26:51.000 Math makes sense when you think rationally about society.
00:26:55.000 So mass shootings are not really a political issue, but if you want to look at the political times, the times it is a political issue, 90% of the time it's jihad.
00:27:05.000 Okay?
00:27:06.000 Or sorry, 80, four to five.
00:27:08.000 So yeah, after the Virginia Tech, there was a huge, the Korean Americans were obsessed with preventing a backlash.
00:27:17.000 Asians fear backlash after Virginia Tech shooting.
00:27:20.000 Might as well say Asians fear more gay bar fights outside.
00:27:25.000 Asians are petrified.
00:27:26.000 And then, of course, when everyone says, what about Charlottesville?
00:27:30.000 What about Heather Heyer?
00:27:31.000 I want you to picture that alleyway fight.
00:27:33.000 Yes, there has been an example of white supremacists killing an innocent woman who was merely protesting hate speech.
00:27:43.000 It's not a pattern.
00:27:46.000 If you want a pattern, check in with literally everybody else.
00:27:51.000 We keep becoming gays in my analogies.
00:27:53.000 Have you noticed that?
00:27:53.000 Maybe that's my latent closeted homosexuality.
00:27:56.000 We're pro-gay.
00:27:58.000 I always say that we're gay.
00:28:01.000 Why not?
00:28:01.000 Let's just get it up.
00:28:02.000 Doesn't it feel good to say?
00:28:03.000 Yeah, I saw Norm McDonald said it the other day just because I'm gay.
00:28:06.000 Yeah, I'm gay.
00:28:07.000 Yeah.
00:28:09.000 It'd be much easier to prove that I'm gay than proving I'm a Nazi, by the way.
00:28:13.000 Southern Poverty Law Center has seemingly spent hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to take everything rude I've said out of context to prove I'm a white nationalist.
00:28:20.000 It's so much easier.
00:28:21.000 Show me making out with Milo.
00:28:23.000 Show me wearing high-heeled shoes.
00:28:24.000 You can show me in drag like 100 times.
00:28:26.000 I've probably said I'm gay like a hundred times.
00:28:30.000 Today.
00:28:32.000 Whispered in my ear.
00:28:33.000 It is gay, Dave.
00:28:35.000 Yeah.
00:28:35.000 That's how I woke you up this morning.
00:28:38.000 I'm gay.
00:28:40.000 I'm gay.
00:28:40.000 That's 36.
00:28:42.000 But the other gay analogy I always use is to be a conservative in a coastal city like New York or LA is exactly like being gay in the 50s.
00:28:50.000 Oh, yeah, Gavin?
00:28:52.000 What about the violence?
00:28:54.000 Yeah.
00:28:54.000 I'm throwing in the violence.
00:28:56.000 I'm throwing in bottled faces and murders and attacks on a daily basis and macing and rioting and CBS saying punch a Nazi.
00:29:08.000 Specifically Richard Spencer, but you know what they meant.
00:29:11.000 They meant Trump.
00:29:13.000 Yes.
00:29:14.000 All those other quotes.
00:29:18.000 Like the Gay in the 50s thing, that reminds me of my trip to I'm trying to get my camera on.
00:29:24.000 Gaytown?
00:29:26.000 Yeah, no.
00:29:27.000 I had a long Uber ride from my house to here.
00:29:29.000 It was $80.
00:29:30.000 And the whole time, we're just kind of just talking about athletics and stuff.
00:29:35.000 And then we're tipping around.
00:29:37.000 He's like, Alex Jones, I mean, he says some crazy stuff.
00:29:40.000 And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:29:42.000 I think we like the same kind of.
00:29:45.000 I've said that before, too.
00:29:46.000 I was at my wife's family reunion, and I see a guy, and we're talking about taxes.
00:29:51.000 And I go, well, sometimes giving corporations a tax break can lead to more jobs.
00:29:56.000 And then he all of a sudden meets me across the room.
00:29:58.000 Like, gays have these bandanas in the back of their pants.
00:30:01.000 And one means I'm up top.
00:30:03.000 The other means I'm on bottom.
00:30:04.000 The other means I like feet or something.
00:30:06.000 All their bandana stuff that they do.
00:30:08.000 There's a bandana for that.
00:30:11.000 There's a bandana for that.
00:30:13.000 And we have that now at parties and stuff.
00:30:15.000 And just like gays, when they finally see each other in the 50s, they hang out, oh my God, you're gay.
00:30:20.000 Come here.
00:30:21.000 They have to go down to an alley.
00:30:22.000 So do we.
00:30:23.000 Like at that party I was talking about, there was a rule, no politics, because they know that I will disagree with a lot of the Indians.
00:30:32.000 And so we said, he was like, I'm going to go on a beer run.
00:30:35.000 You want to come?
00:30:36.000 I was like, yeah, sure, I'll come on a beer run.
00:30:39.000 And then we get in the car and we just rocking.
00:30:43.000 That's our sex, right?
00:30:44.000 And then we come back and when we came to the party, we both went in opposite directions.
00:30:48.000 Because we had already done the disgusting gay act.
00:30:52.000 Just whispering.
00:30:53.000 Or even like gays used to, the way they would go to bars in the 50s is a gay would find a lesbian and a lesbian would find a gay and they double date.
00:31:00.000 But the lesbians would be playing footsie under the table and so would the gays.
00:31:03.000 And they'd pretend, this is my girlfriend that I love so much.
00:31:07.000 We have to do that.
00:31:08.000 Like proud boys can't wear Fred Perry's in certain places.
00:31:11.000 You can't wear a MAGA hat anywhere in New York.
00:31:14.000 There's no bar where you could wear a MAGA hat from top to bottom, from the financial district to the top of Harlem.
00:31:22.000 There is not one bar where you could wear a MAGA hat and feel safe and not get kicked out.
00:31:28.000 Well, there's probably some where you wouldn't get kicked out immediately, but you're playing with fire.
00:31:33.000 And there's, I'm going to say, I don't want to say hundreds, dozens and dozens of bars in New York where you'd just be immediately kicked out.
00:31:41.000 Same way if you went sacheting into a bar with like a boa feather boa with your boyfriend in 1950 and said, hi, I'm here for a strawberry daiquiri.
00:31:50.000 I'm a fag.
00:31:51.000 I'm here for a pinkity drinkety.
00:31:55.000 And when you're proving that I'm gay, by the way, make sure you take that last one out of context.
00:31:59.000 I'm a fag.
00:32:02.000 I'm still going with this, by the way, because it is a very distinct pattern.
00:32:07.000 And it's strange that we're being blamed for this horrible racial backlash.
00:32:12.000 For example, in 2014, I was working in Toronto at Rebel News, and they shot a man who was guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.
00:32:22.000 He was dressed, I forget there's this particular group of Canadian soldiers that's linked to Scotland in World War II.
00:32:28.000 So he had on a kilt and everything.
00:32:30.000 And the worst part of this story, by the way, he's holding a gun and it has no bullets in it because that would be dangerous.
00:32:39.000 So, this soldier guarding a tomb is impotent and can't defend himself.
00:32:44.000 A jihadist, who, by the way, whose mother was the head of some like assimilating Muslims diversity group, that was her job, and she couldn't even assimilate her own son.
00:32:56.000 You'll notice a pattern there, by the way, in Canada with these jihadists.
00:33:00.000 They tend to have Muslim fathers who abandon them.
00:33:04.000 Like the École Polytechnique, that guy who killed 14 women, that's just seen as some crazed sexist.
00:33:10.000 Actually, that's another example that should be on this list.
00:33:12.000 Oh, there's the guy, there's the guy.
00:33:13.000 What's his name?
00:33:14.000 Captain Nathan Cirillo.
00:33:16.000 I remember, and I apologize for not having that memorized.
00:33:19.000 Yeah, the Polytechnique shooting is another example of exactly what I'm talking about.
00:33:23.000 They stripped the fact that he grew up Muslim with a Muslim father who abandoned him, and they made it all just crazed sexist.
00:33:32.000 What's his name?
00:33:33.000 École Polytechnique, Montreal.
00:33:37.000 Mark LePine.
00:33:38.000 Yeah, Mark Lepine.
00:33:39.000 Mark LePine, yeah.
00:33:40.000 Now, if you look him up on Wikipedia, you see his birth name is actually a Muslim name.
00:33:45.000 Hmm.
00:33:46.000 Minor Diet.
00:33:47.000 Mark LePine, right next to 1989.
00:33:50.000 Click on that.
00:33:50.000 You know, I remember going to a vigil.
00:33:53.000 Click on Mark Lepeen, dumbass.
00:33:56.000 Born Gamil Rodriguez Lias Garby.
00:34:00.000 Garby.
00:34:01.000 Crucial detail there.
00:34:03.000 And there's been rumors, unconfirmed, that he yelled Aloh Akbar.
00:34:08.000 Kathy Schadel's written about that.
00:34:09.000 I couldn't find confirmation on that.
00:34:12.000 But yeah, he's a sexist pig.
00:34:15.000 This is an example of sexism.
00:34:16.000 Yeah, it kind of is.
00:34:18.000 Muslim sexism.
00:34:21.000 Another fun example of this is when a white man killed Trayvon Martin.
00:34:28.000 Oh yeah, but they made it white Hispanic later.
00:34:31.000 Initially, when they first started reporting this, it was yet another white man killed an innocent black man.
00:34:37.000 And if you talk to people in the streets, especially in the hood, it was these white people hunting us down, man.
00:34:44.000 White people like George Zimmerman.
00:34:47.000 George Zimmerman is not a white man.
00:34:50.000 You are taking, and they do this with Hispanic stats all the time.
00:34:54.000 If they want to make someone look bad, then they take the white Hispanics and just call them white.
00:34:58.000 If they want to make Hispanics look good, then they call them Hispanic.
00:35:03.000 And it's a false narrative trying to prove, trying desperately to prove that America is a racist hellhole.
00:35:10.000 Hate has no home here.
00:35:11.000 We have to fight hate.
00:35:13.000 What hate?
00:35:14.000 Charlottesville.
00:35:16.000 Okay, gay alleyway fight.
00:35:18.000 That's my rebuttal to your anecdotal evidence.
00:35:24.000 George Zimmerman is a Peruvian.
00:35:27.000 Zimmerman sounds Jewish.
00:35:28.000 I don't know what his German father was, but he's half European, half Peruvian.
00:35:32.000 You know who else has that exact same ethnicity?
00:35:35.000 Koreinka Kilcher.
00:35:38.000 The stunning, I'm going to say 8.9.
00:35:41.000 No, her chin's a bit much.
00:35:43.000 Let's call her an 8.
00:35:45.000 8 seems low.
00:35:45.000 What do you think?
00:35:46.000 Well, you're weird about visible minorities.
00:35:49.000 Because you are one.
00:35:50.000 I'm going to give her 8.4.
00:35:52.000 An 8.45.
00:35:54.000 Not quite an 8.5.
00:35:56.000 She played this Indian in that movie with Colin Farrell, Colin Firth, The New World.
00:36:01.000 And she wears turquoise all the time, like she's some sort of Cherokee.
00:36:04.000 She's a Peruvian.
00:36:05.000 She's like half Aztec, half European.
00:36:08.000 There's nothing remotely American Indian about her.
00:36:10.000 You don't get to wear that shit around your neck, lady.
00:36:12.000 That's cultural appropriation right now.
00:36:15.000 And white people are too stupid when it comes to American Indians to know the difference.
00:36:19.000 And they're so scared of minorities that when they see a brown lady in turquoise who claims to have some sort of Aboriginal background, you go, you're a Cherokee.
00:36:27.000 Sorry.
00:36:27.000 I'll step out of the way.
00:36:28.000 Elizabeth Warren?
00:36:29.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:36:30.000 Another example of this was the mailbomb suspect.
00:36:33.000 Remember that guy who sent mail bombs to CNN and all these different people?
00:36:39.000 Let's take a look at this guy's mailbombs.
00:36:43.000 Look at his hair.
00:36:45.000 What?
00:36:46.000 That's not hair hair.
00:36:46.000 That's the worst hairdo in the entire world.
00:36:50.000 And don't send me some burn victims or someone else with head trauma.
00:36:54.000 As far as not an act of God and something you could save, that's the worst hairdo I've ever seen in my entire life.
00:37:03.000 The hair don't.
00:37:05.000 Oh, and oh yeah, that's a good example.
00:37:06.000 I'm glad you got that.
00:37:09.000 Look at them brighten him up.
00:37:11.000 Why do you want to hate white people so badly?
00:37:14.000 Why are you so determined?
00:37:16.000 It's like Ann Coulter said, the only thing that unites all these disparate groups, like black Christians and LGBT and all these other groups that have absolutely nothing in common, like communists and anarchists, is their hatred of white guys.
00:37:28.000 And I would go farther than that and say they hate Americans, they hate traditionalists, they hate Christians, Catholics, patriarchs.
00:37:35.000 It's not as simple as just white men.
00:37:36.000 They hate tradition.
00:37:40.000 Last example.
00:37:42.000 So...
00:37:46.000 Oh, let's have a look at his life of unbelievably bad hair.
00:37:50.000 This is just how they lighten them up through all of these, too.
00:37:53.000 I mean, you could make an argument that they're contrasting so that way they could bring out more features, but it seems like if I had a goal, How dark, how weird would you feel if you're working in a newspaper and the editor comes over and says, what are you doing with the lightness?
00:38:10.000 It would be like fixing a fight.
00:38:12.000 It would be like your manager telling you to go down in the second round.
00:38:14.000 You'd say, what'd you say, boss?
00:38:15.000 We're forging an autograph.
00:38:16.000 And then he just reaches over your shoulder in Photoshop and goes, I think it's Command M to levels.
00:38:23.000 And then there's that.
00:38:25.000 There's that line where you can take the blackout.
00:38:28.000 And without saying anything to the graphic designer, he just slides that over to the right.
00:38:33.000 And the graphic designer's like, are you sure?
00:38:36.000 This is perfect inside baseball talk with Adobe Photoshop speed.
00:38:42.000 Okay, for the record.
00:38:43.000 It would be like, remember that time I told you, like, I fixed Goofy's signature, his autograph?
00:38:48.000 And my mom's like, you can't just fix an autograph.
00:38:50.000 That's the way he autographed it when I was at Disney World.
00:38:52.000 Right, right.
00:38:53.000 It'd be changing it from Goofy to Mickey Mouse.
00:38:55.000 Nah, it was Mickey.
00:38:57.000 Let me just tell you who Caesar Sayak.
00:38:59.000 Oh, they hate When they have weird names too, don't they?
00:39:01.000 They wish George Zimmerman was George Schmidt.
00:39:04.000 But Caesar Sayak is the exact same ethnicity as Bruno Mars.
00:39:09.000 That is, that's Bruno Mars.
00:39:11.000 Look at him go.
00:39:13.000 Look at him move.
00:39:15.000 I send mailbombs to CNN.
00:39:23.000 I hate Bruno Mars, by the way.
00:39:25.000 I hate his music.
00:39:27.000 I hate his moves.
00:39:28.000 I hate how he's so into being cool.
00:39:32.000 Makes me sick.
00:39:33.000 He's just biting on old retro stuff.
00:39:35.000 It's always biting on retro.
00:39:37.000 Before it was the 50s, he was like a crooner.
00:39:39.000 Gross.
00:39:39.000 All right.
00:39:40.000 We're running out of time here.
00:39:42.000 I want to get to the mailbag, though, just to briefly look at the new sunglasses shirts.
00:39:51.000 No, stop.
00:39:53.000 You don't like that one?
00:39:54.000 I like that song, but I want to see the graphic.
00:39:56.000 Okay.
00:39:57.000 Don't you have a graphic?
00:39:58.000 Yep.
00:39:59.000 And I want to hear the song.
00:40:06.000 Let's turn the grace together and smell bad.
00:40:12.000 Let me touch it.
00:40:13.000 When we started this project, one of the questions going around with the team was, what about t-shirts?
00:40:18.000 And I said, t-shirts are a beautiful, natural, organic thing.
00:40:21.000 I don't know if you've ever dealt pot in college, but you don't have to advertise.
00:40:26.000 People just hear that you sell weed and naturally your customers start appearing.
00:40:30.000 I've noticed that with shirts.
00:40:31.000 Now, I knew I wanted free speech.tv, and that's a shirt we got on the site.
00:40:36.000 I wanted Clown World because it seems to be the sort of general thrust, really, of the show is this insane world we're living in where Bruno Mars and that Indian chick are white people.
00:40:48.000 Kiana Kilchker.
00:40:50.000 Get a normal name, lady.
00:40:53.000 You know?
00:40:54.000 Yeah.
00:40:54.000 In my day, when immigrants would come to a new country, their names were like Shortin Zantbortia.
00:41:01.000 But my name is Mike.
00:41:03.000 Good.
00:41:04.000 Be Mike.
00:41:07.000 And this new shirt that has happened organically is, I like your new sunglasses, which is, I think, the gayest thing I've ever heard a person say.
00:41:16.000 And he was high on heroin and being annoying, talking to his girlfriend.
00:41:20.000 So people have been sending in designs.
00:41:23.000 I like that one a lot.
00:41:24.000 You know, the thing I like about that is it's in the same tone, like it's super lame.
00:41:30.000 You know what I mean by lame?
00:41:31.000 It feels like the same sentiment.
00:41:33.000 Yeah.
00:41:34.000 It feels like that's what he was going for.
00:41:36.000 Yeah.
00:41:37.000 Let's see what else you got.
00:41:37.000 All right.
00:41:39.000 That one's good.
00:41:40.000 You want to go to the really bad one or the really good one first?
00:41:43.000 Well, that, let's go to the really bad one.
00:41:45.000 I always like to start with bad news.
00:41:45.000 Okay.
00:41:47.000 Same when you're moving.
00:41:48.000 Oh, my God.
00:41:48.000 Start with.
00:41:50.000 Start with the heavy boxes when you're moving.
00:41:52.000 But this has the depression.
00:41:54.000 Well, that's kind of what he looks like.
00:41:57.000 How did he know that?
00:41:58.000 I don't know.
00:41:59.000 I guess all junkies look the same.
00:42:01.000 Dude, you're not good at drawing.
00:42:05.000 You're kind of guilty of this too.
00:42:06.000 You think you're much better than you are.
00:42:08.000 I don't say I'm good.
00:42:10.000 Oh, okay.
00:42:11.000 I just keep drawing.
00:42:12.000 You suck, and this guy sucks.
00:42:14.000 That's a pretty good Hello Kitty, though.
00:42:16.000 Yeah, I guess.
00:42:17.000 And he tried to kiss your ass by putting Anal Chinook on the.
00:42:20.000 Okay, so that's not even worth discussing.
00:42:20.000 Yeah.
00:42:22.000 What else do you got?
00:42:23.000 It's worth discussing.
00:42:26.000 I remember seeing this, and this guy definitely has access to great fonts, but the circle's kind of extraneous.
00:42:26.000 Oh, yes.
00:42:33.000 Because the glasses don't wrap around it like it's a head.
00:42:36.000 Yeah, it makes me think of baseball.
00:42:38.000 And I think the glasses, to be more iconic, should be straight.
00:42:42.000 Maybe sunglasses could be written.
00:42:43.000 I think the first one's the winner.
00:42:45.000 All right.
00:42:46.000 Important order of business.
00:42:48.000 You may have to Google Imager.
00:42:50.000 I can't believe we don't have Gail Godot.
00:42:53.000 Gal Godot?
00:42:54.000 Why don't we have Gal Godot in our hottest list?
00:42:58.000 Is she too hot and not approachable?
00:43:02.000 I don't know.
00:43:03.000 All these anti-Semites hate her.
00:43:06.000 All these Palestinian students for freedom of Palestine want her banned.
00:43:11.000 And she's really patriotic, too.
00:43:13.000 Uh-oh.
00:43:14.000 She's really patriotic about Israel, which is cool.
00:43:20.000 Oh my Lord.
00:43:21.000 Israelis are...
00:43:29.000 What is in the hummus?
00:43:31.000 Gorgeous babe juice.
00:43:32.000 They all have...
00:43:39.000 So what do you think, Ryan?
00:43:40.000 Is she too conventionally pretty to be...
00:43:43.000 I don't see why she wouldn't be on the list.
00:43:44.000 I mean, like, there's...
00:43:54.000 No irreverent charm.
00:43:55.000 No little quirkiness.
00:43:56.000 But there, there.
00:43:57.000 See, she's got some humanity.
00:43:59.000 Like quirk.
00:44:00.000 I see what you mean.
00:44:00.000 Yeah, so she's in.
00:44:01.000 We'll have to order it.
00:44:01.000 She's in.
00:44:03.000 We'll show you in the next show.
00:44:05.000 We'll just check up on the chart.
00:44:06.000 But I'm thinking that she's going to be somewhere around.
00:44:09.000 If she had freckles.
00:44:11.000 Oh, if she had freckles and a gap in her tooth, she'd be at the top.
00:44:14.000 She is on, I think she's going to be around number 11.
00:44:14.000 Might be number one.
00:44:25.000 All right, I think we're done here, my man.
00:44:26.000 Let's end with...
00:44:31.000 Well, I showed it to my trainer and I said, I think I found the opponent that I'm looking for.
00:44:35.000 I want to fight Karen.
00:44:37.000 And he goes, yeah, I don't think you're quite ready for her.
00:44:40.000 This is more your speed.
00:44:42.000 And he sent me, I emailed it to you.
00:44:45.000 He sent me a video of who he thinks I should fight.
00:44:51.000 Now, it's not flattering.
00:44:53.000 I've seen, we've screened this.
00:44:56.000 I would be the guy with this weird silicon muscles.
00:44:59.000 And the guy who has...
00:45:03.000 That's the guy I'm going to fight.
00:45:05.000 Warming up.
00:45:08.000 Getting the blood flowing.
00:45:09.000 Loosen the muscles.
00:45:11.000 Can't be stiff, right?
00:45:13.000 I notice, by the way, if you're punching the ribs, you have a cracked rib.
00:45:15.000 When you work out, the pain goes away.
00:45:18.000 It relaxes the muscles.
00:45:21.000 So this is backwards because they don't want to have it stolen, but he seems to be some sort of a Mexican gentleman.
00:45:27.000 And look at who he is fighting, This guy.
00:45:31.000 There he is.
00:45:34.000 What is in the middle of his chest?
00:45:35.000 He has to flex to keep that in place.
00:45:37.000 Is he a piggy bank?
00:45:38.000 Do you put quarters in the center of his chest?
00:45:40.000 Or did someone defecate on him?
00:45:43.000 What is that?
00:45:43.000 Yeah, that's definitely 3D.
00:45:46.000 So I think it's fake, it's fake chest hair with a tattoo.
00:45:49.000 Yeah, we were talking about how he looks like he's CGI from when they first started making CGI.
00:45:54.000 Not like that men at work.
00:45:55.000 That ain't working.
00:45:56.000 Not that bad, but like the first okay CGI video game.
00:46:00.000 1964, like World Wrestling Federation game.
00:46:03.000 Someone was asking, what would compel someone to do that?
00:46:05.000 And I'm just like, mental illness and money.
00:46:08.000 If you're super rich and you're really, really, really slow and crazy, you know, you do that to your chest and you surround yourself with a bunch of yes men and they go, yeah, let's do it.
00:46:20.000 The audience is laughing, by the way.
00:46:23.000 Do you remember that?
00:46:25.000 Big ears.
00:46:32.000 Yeah, it is.
00:46:34.000 All right.
00:46:36.000 So I'm in the striped trunks.
00:46:38.000 That's my opponent in the grave.
00:46:40.000 Ooh, nice block.
00:46:41.000 Nice block.
00:46:42.000 Blocking the body shots.
00:46:44.000 He's taking a beating and he's down.
00:46:48.000 He doesn't even know to go to a neutral corner because this is the first time he's ever been in the ring.
00:46:53.000 Are you sure you're okay from that death-defying blow?
00:46:58.000 Okay, silicon arms gets back in.
00:47:00.000 Oh, what a blow.
00:47:02.000 What a blow.
00:47:03.000 Look how unnatural that looks.
00:47:06.000 Even when I watch Rocky, like, Mr. T is the worst fake fighter ever.
00:47:11.000 Oof!
00:47:12.000 Oosh!
00:47:13.000 He's got the body of, like, a kangaroo on two feet.
00:47:17.000 It looks unnatural.
00:47:18.000 His shoulders are so weird.
00:47:20.000 So he's had silicon put in his biceps and his forearms and his packs.
00:47:25.000 Like, he's got about one, two, three, four, five, six fake tit packs in his body.
00:47:30.000 This guy's dead.
00:47:31.000 Look at him.
00:47:33.000 What is going on in the middle of his chest?
00:47:34.000 There's a hole there.
00:47:35.000 His face is purple and his body isn't.
00:47:38.000 He has a hole in his chest.
00:47:40.000 He has a butt.
00:47:40.000 Oh, I know what he did.
00:47:41.000 It's a butthole.
00:47:42.000 They said, sir, there's one way we can make positive that your pecs never move and they retain their shape.
00:47:48.000 We cut your ass off and we stick it in your chest.
00:47:51.000 There's one major flaw, which I'm sure you can guess.
00:47:54.000 Oh, let's see the replay.
00:47:56.000 Blocks it with the silicon.
00:47:58.000 Doesn't even hurt.
00:47:59.000 Boom, and you're out.
00:48:01.000 You're done for, man.
00:48:02.000 Imagine he punches him in the chest.
00:48:03.000 He's like, hey, no punching in the butthole.
00:48:07.000 That was above the belt.
00:48:11.000 Thank you for tuning into the show.
00:48:13.000 Again, these are just sort of the test episodes.
00:48:15.000 Maybe we should call these.
00:48:16.000 It'd be cool if we had playlists, and one of them was test apps.
00:48:20.000 But however long this show is, I think is at the time I feel comfortable with.
00:48:26.000 So we'll work that out.
00:48:27.000 It feels like it's about an hour.
00:48:29.000 I like you more than a friend, and I'll see you tomorrow.
00:48:32.000 I got to think of a good goodbye.
00:48:34.000 Yeah.
00:48:34.000 It can't be get off my lawn again.
00:48:38.000 Why not?
00:48:38.000 Or it could be.
00:48:39.000 You want to try it?
00:48:43.000 Yeah, and do me a favor, get off my lawn.
00:48:48.000 I never knew that a kid like me could take his mic around the world after big-ass dingy and rock the masses.
00:48:54.000 From Madrid to Calabasas.
00:48:56.000 He wanna make me go through the devils and don't be though.
00:48:59.000 They know me, though, cause I've been putting to work.