Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - May 13, 2019


S02E06 - ALEX JONES FIGHTS BACK


Episode Stats

Length

51 minutes

Words per Minute

171.21526

Word Count

8,829

Sentence Count

847

Misogynist Sentences

23

Hate Speech Sentences

17


Summary

Comedian Chris Farley was a man of many talents. He was a comedian, a rock star, and a rock god. In this episode, we talk about his life, his music, and how he died.


Transcript

00:00:08.000 The first time I saw him, he was sweeter than honey.
00:00:13.000 Oh, live from New York.
00:00:16.000 It's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGinnis.
00:00:23.000 Then he cartwheeled around the room and slowed with a cleaning lady.
00:00:28.000 He was a one-man party.
00:00:31.000 You know I'm talking about.
00:00:33.000 I'm talking about my friend Chris Farley.
00:00:40.000 People were stronger back then.
00:00:43.000 Boomboxes are heavy.
00:00:45.000 That guy in Do the Right Thing with the love-hate rings, Radio Rahim, that guy must have been built to carry that thing.
00:00:53.000 It weighs like 40 pounds.
00:00:57.000 What do you think of our new shirts that just came in, folks?
00:00:59.000 There he is.
00:01:01.000 Jesus, Radio.
00:01:02.000 You must have some pipes on.
00:01:04.000 He was looking like you're struggling.
00:01:05.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:01:06.000 He's like, fuck.
00:01:07.000 Yeah, this is like the fifth take they've done.
00:01:09.000 He's like, yo, we do another take.
00:01:11.000 I need a break.
00:01:12.000 Oh, he's so strong.
00:01:15.000 That's Ryan watching me pick up my boombox.
00:01:20.000 American muscle.
00:01:21.000 If I love you, I love you.
00:01:23.000 But if I hate you, I hate you.
00:01:26.000 I almost got love and hate tattooed on my knuckles because I could not agree more.
00:01:35.000 That was a tearjerker.
00:01:36.000 Adam Sandler hosted SNL.
00:01:38.000 He did a good job, but SNL sucks.
00:01:42.000 Staring at these cue cards.
00:01:44.000 It drives me insane.
00:01:47.000 But it was a very beautiful tribute, and it's hard not to cry when you want.
00:01:51.000 I can't hear it.
00:01:55.000 There's some of their terrible sketches together.
00:01:57.000 Whether you was a bumblebee girl or living in a van down by the river.
00:02:01.000 Woo!
00:02:03.000 Cocaine.
00:02:04.000 Fat people should not do cocaine.
00:02:06.000 Hey, fat souls and old guys, don't do Coke.
00:02:10.000 Hey, John Candy.
00:02:11.000 Hey, Tony Soprano.
00:02:13.000 James Gandalfini.
00:02:14.000 Hey, John Belushi.
00:02:16.000 Actually, don't know if John Candy died of Coke.
00:02:18.000 Me neither.
00:02:18.000 Yeah, I was kind of surprised to hear that.
00:02:20.000 I just threw that out there.
00:02:21.000 I was actually thinking of John Belushi when I said it.
00:02:23.000 Doesn't that song sound like Toby Keith?
00:02:27.000 Which song?
00:02:27.000 Courtesy the Red, White, and Blue.
00:02:28.000 Oh, yes.
00:02:30.000 Hey.
00:02:36.000 And Chris Farley's guitar.
00:02:41.000 He did a mountain of Coke till the day that he died.
00:02:49.000 And live happy and be fat and Coke-free.
00:02:53.000 He likes stuff like the Krispy of the Creams.
00:03:01.000 Yeah, I saw this documentary about Chris Farley, and it was all about how New York City ate him up.
00:03:06.000 Poor kid from the Midwest.
00:03:08.000 Yeah, he was not a poor kid.
00:03:10.000 New York City did not eat him up.
00:03:12.000 He ate New York City up.
00:03:14.000 He had like three Asian girlfriends at a time, hookers, strippers.
00:03:18.000 Yes, he was an intense partier.
00:03:21.000 You know what it also sounds like?
00:03:22.000 It sounds like, well, he's clearly trying to be Bruce Springsteen.
00:03:25.000 Yeah.
00:03:25.000 But he's trying to, it's Atlantic City era Bruce Springsteen, which is on a fucking amazing album.
00:03:31.000 Nebraska.
00:03:32.000 Nebraska.
00:03:32.000 They're getting ready for a fight.
00:03:35.000 Gonna see what them racquet boys can do.
00:03:38.000 Now there's trouble busing in from out of state.
00:03:44.000 And the DA can't get no way.
00:03:46.000 Did you miss the beginning, the Chicken Man?
00:03:49.000 Why don't we have friends like that?
00:03:51.000 I want to be like, the chicken man's going to be here.
00:03:53.000 Who's the chicken man?
00:03:55.000 He said, well, they blew up a chicken man in Philly last night.
00:03:59.000 And they what is the chicken man?
00:04:04.000 I guess he's going to blew.
00:04:05.000 I don't know.
00:04:06.000 The chicken man probably owed some money.
00:04:08.000 And they burned down his house, too.
00:04:11.000 Chicken man at Atlantic City.
00:04:13.000 Actually, there's a guy at my gym who sweats so much, I call him Hydroman.
00:04:16.000 He broke my rib.
00:04:18.000 Every time I feel an impending sneeze, I honestly would rather have a homeless man like Gary come up and just be like, could I get a kiss?
00:04:26.000 I'd be like, if it's going to make the sneeze go away, come here.
00:04:29.000 I would rather smooch the homeless than sneeze, cough, get out of bed, fart, blow my nose.
00:04:36.000 That's another brutal one.
00:04:37.000 Yeah, I hate blowing my nose.
00:04:38.000 But your ribs aren't broken, dumbass.
00:04:40.000 I'm talking about having a bunch of people.
00:04:41.000 They were.
00:04:41.000 Remember when you knocked me good?
00:04:43.000 You knocked me good?
00:04:44.000 That sounds like a funk song.
00:04:46.000 He knocks me good.
00:04:48.000 It's like another, an era bygone, like Tina Turner singing about being beaten by Ike Turner and liking it.
00:04:54.000 He knocks me good.
00:04:55.000 It puts me in line.
00:04:58.000 That's actually a song.
00:05:01.000 When he hits me, it feels like a kiss.
00:05:04.000 It's a 1950s black girl group song.
00:05:10.000 And it's just this beautiful ballad about getting slapped around and how it shows that he cares.
00:05:17.000 It's not a joke song.
00:05:19.000 It's an actual song.
00:05:21.000 The crystals, that's it.
00:05:23.000 When he hits me.
00:05:28.000 Love.
00:05:30.000 We should play this surreptitiously at the Me Too.
00:05:34.000 And it felt like a kiss.
00:05:38.000 What a weird song.
00:05:41.000 She hit me Pshh But it didn't hurt me Pshh They should add in hitting sound effects.
00:05:50.000 I wouldn't stand to hear me say that I've been with someone new.
00:05:59.000 Yeah, that's a good reason.
00:06:00.000 And when I told him I had been untrue.
00:06:06.000 I like it.
00:06:08.000 You know what?
00:06:08.000 I'm going to make a racial observation.
00:06:10.000 I have noticed that, and this is just anecdotal evidence, caveat, caveat.
00:06:15.000 Dated a couple black girls, and I noticed that they really wanted me to be jealous a lot.
00:06:21.000 I'm not a jealous guy.
00:06:22.000 I'm just a jealous guy.
00:06:25.000 And I wouldn't really care.
00:06:26.000 And that would piss them off.
00:06:27.000 And then if I said, hey, what are you talking to him for?
00:06:29.000 I would have to fake it.
00:06:30.000 What are you talking about?
00:06:31.000 Get over here.
00:06:31.000 Get over here.
00:06:32.000 Don't talk to him.
00:06:33.000 They would be super into it, like super turned on.
00:06:36.000 I was like, okay, I'm real jealous.
00:06:40.000 Oh, I'm going to hit you.
00:06:44.000 But yeah, you're watching that video and you think, God, SNL was so funny, wasn't it?
00:06:48.000 Or was it?
00:06:49.000 Let me look up some sketches.
00:06:50.000 Let's look up some of the great sketches.
00:06:52.000 Now, again, I love Chris Farley.
00:06:54.000 I think he's hilarious.
00:06:55.000 I love all his movies.
00:06:57.000 I think Adam Sandler is also immensely talented, and he seems to be getting funnier with age.
00:07:02.000 His movies are like 80% of the time, they're slam dunks.
00:07:05.000 A few stinkers.
00:07:06.000 That's fine.
00:07:06.000 His stand-up, you loved.
00:07:07.000 You were blowing up.
00:07:08.000 His stand-up is unbelievable, especially his last special.
00:07:11.000 I was just watching going, this guy is gifted.
00:07:15.000 It's like watching DeGrom pitch.
00:07:17.000 You're just watching something that you could never do.
00:07:20.000 And you can tell he's a hard worker, too.
00:07:22.000 Like this song, he memorized.
00:07:24.000 But then you go back to SNL, which is not his fault.
00:07:26.000 Lauren Michaels goes to the Groundlings in Chicago and all these improv troops, and he rounds up the most talented people in the area of improv.
00:07:37.000 And then he says to them, yeah, make sure you don't do any improv and read these cue cards, which, by the way, we haven't even, like, now you can put cue cards, teleprompters, on the screen.
00:07:48.000 So you're looking into the camera.
00:07:50.000 These are on the fucking ground.
00:07:52.000 So there's some guy holding them, manually holding them, and they're sitting there reading from left to right the script.
00:07:59.000 So this is...
00:08:00.000 He took him from the groundlings to reading from the groundlings.
00:08:15.000 Sorry.
00:08:17.000 So this is a sketch where the mom is reading the Zagat whatever restaurant stuff, and Adam Sandler's cracking up that his buddy is in drag, which is very funny if this was the early 30s.
00:08:29.000 But look at how unfunny this is.
00:08:32.000 ...in town.
00:08:33.000 Their sensual setting will set the mood for any romantic rendezvous.
00:08:38.000 Oh, hear that, hey?
00:08:51.000 I'm kind of smirking, but it's such a cheap laugh.
00:08:56.000 Give me cancer now, guys!
00:09:04.000 Find Southern Fair at Charlie's.
00:09:07.000 I mean, Chris Farley just carried that whole terrible attempt at comedy on his back.
00:09:13.000 Okay, here's the worst one.
00:09:15.000 This is a thing called Hair Hilly Boy.
00:09:18.000 And Adam Sandler plays a guy who does house sitting.
00:09:21.000 And there's a commercial we're watching on TV for a house sitter who would like to come and feed your plants and sleep in your bed while you're gone.
00:09:29.000 It goes on for about 100 years.
00:09:31.000 We will not be showing the full 100 years.
00:09:33.000 And then Chris Farley comes in and does his screaming character.
00:09:35.000 The poor bastard.
00:09:36.000 Maybe he got addicted to cocaine because he always had to carry these weak bits by going blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:09:45.000 Or his boom box.
00:09:46.000 You never bet.
00:09:48.000 I'll sleep in the exact same position as you sleep.
00:09:52.000 You can trust me.
00:09:54.000 I'll even wash the sheets before you come back.
00:09:56.000 How's that?
00:09:57.000 Please?
00:09:59.000 Sweet mother of God, what is the holdup?
00:10:03.000 Let the boy sleep in your damn bed!
00:10:06.000 He said he'd wash the sheets.
00:10:09.000 Yeah?
00:10:12.000 And then we go back to him.
00:10:14.000 What's the joke?
00:10:16.000 That there's a guy who does house sitting and he's terrible?
00:10:20.000 I think maybe it's just the chemistry.
00:10:21.000 Just like, this guy's going to crack.
00:10:23.000 We know Adam's going to crack.
00:10:24.000 Let's just set it up again.
00:10:25.000 Well, do that on your own time.
00:10:27.000 Right.
00:10:27.000 Don't do that to me.
00:10:28.000 All right.
00:10:30.000 Let's get serious here.
00:10:31.000 We have Alex Jones on the show.
00:10:36.000 These are our shirts.
00:10:37.000 They're available on the site, free speech.tv.
00:10:42.000 I think they very effectively give your position, which is not only do I not agree with you, not only am I not a Nazi, not only are they, all of them not Nazis, this whole discussion is clown world.
00:10:53.000 Like with the Covington Catholic school kids, you don't just say, I don't think they were disrupting that thing.
00:10:58.000 You go, this whole question is clown town.
00:11:07.000 And we are living in a bizarre clown world.
00:11:11.000 Now, these are pre-taped shows, so this may be old news to you, but over the weekend, we lost Milo, Lara Loomer, and Alex Jones to what exactly?
00:11:23.000 Why were they banned from Facebook?
00:11:25.000 Well, not only are they banned from Facebook, but any praise of them is also banned from Facebook.
00:11:30.000 Now, I sent you some links about it.
00:11:34.000 I'm blamed, believe it or not, for a lot of their banning.
00:11:37.000 They say Alex Jones is banned because he hosted me on his show.
00:11:43.000 I don't know if you have that clip.
00:11:47.000 Yeah, there you go.
00:11:49.000 And then there's Lara Loomer.
00:11:51.000 Lara Loomer.
00:11:52.000 Oh, this is Yiannopoulos and Loomer have all recently promoted Gavin McInnis, founder of the violence-prone far-right group Proud Boys, whom Facebook banned in October.
00:12:00.000 You'll notice, by the way, that Jones, Yiannapouse, praised me and sent them to defendgavin.com, where we raised a quarter of a million dollars to fight the SPLC.
00:12:10.000 Is it possible that the SPLC encouraged old Zucky to get rid of them?
00:12:16.000 Because I am named a hell of a lot in these explanations.
00:12:19.000 Check out this article from the BBC where they say Alex Jones hosted on his program.
00:12:26.000 Go ahead.
00:12:27.000 They really got to update their spelling, those Brits, whose members are known for racist, anti-Muslim, blah, blah, blah rhetoric.
00:12:33.000 And I've been designated a hate figure by Facebook.
00:12:37.000 I do hate my figure.
00:12:38.000 Look at this.
00:12:40.000 I work out every day.
00:12:42.000 And I just can't seem to lose this little bit of gunt.
00:12:42.000 Every day.
00:12:47.000 What else does it say there in the BBC?
00:12:49.000 Known as a hate figure.
00:12:50.000 Facebook said this year, Milo Yiannopoulos had publicly praised both Mr. McInnes and English Defence League founder Tommy Robinson, both banned from the network.
00:12:59.000 Laura Luma also appeared with Mr. McInnes, and Facebook said she also praised another banned figure, Faith Goldie.
00:13:06.000 A Canadian Nation of Islam leader, Louis Farrakhan, was banned for making several anti-Semitic remarks earlier this year.
00:13:13.000 Earlier this year?
00:13:15.000 So, what happens?
00:13:16.000 You got to let them sort of settle for six months before you ban the person?
00:13:21.000 You got to let them ruminate?
00:13:24.000 They were giving him a chance to take them back.
00:13:26.000 Snoop Dogg, by the way, has taken up arms for Farrakhan and is encouraging people to spread his word all over the place.
00:13:32.000 I hate Farrakhan.
00:13:33.000 I hate that Farrakhan gets this mainstream acceptance.
00:13:33.000 I hate Snoop.
00:13:37.000 Barack Obama associated with Farrakhan.
00:13:40.000 Shouldn't he be banned?
00:13:42.000 Stevie Wonder should be banned.
00:13:43.000 Snoop Dogg should be banned according to these rules.
00:13:45.000 Now, you know how I feel, free speech.
00:13:48.000 No one should be banned.
00:13:50.000 But you're not consistent because you're lying.
00:13:53.000 You didn't wait six months because of Farrakhan.
00:13:55.000 Farrakhan's in there because you wanted to look balanced.
00:13:59.000 So you just, he's a sacrificial lamb.
00:14:01.000 Loomer, Jones, and Yiannopoulos are all part of this charming pro-Trump thing that makes the left very nervous.
00:14:10.000 And I am crushing the SPLC, so they're forcing Facebook to fight back.
00:14:15.000 And it's ironic because when I was down in the dumps after I lost everything, not just social media, but my job and not my wife, thank God.
00:14:24.000 It was Alex Jones who said, he played me the opening to Bionic Man.
00:14:30.000 And he said, we can rebuild him.
00:14:33.000 We can put him back together.
00:14:35.000 You can't give up because he's been through this a million times.
00:14:39.000 He was Milo Yiannopoulos in the 80s.
00:14:42.000 He's seen these ebbs and flows of censorship and tyranny.
00:14:47.000 But it really, right now, we are in a peak.
00:14:52.000 We are not in a trough of censorship.
00:14:55.000 Tucker was talking about on his show recently, and he was juxtaposing.
00:15:00.000 Sometimes I think this show, I'll just show Tucker Carlson, and then I'll just sit here in the smaller box going, uh-huh.
00:15:07.000 Sort of like those black girls, Diamond Silk.
00:15:09.000 He'll be diamond, and I'll be silk, and I'll just be like, uh-huh, damn straight.
00:15:13.000 Mm-hmm.
00:15:14.000 You tell it like it is.
00:15:15.000 That's what he said.
00:15:16.000 Oh, yeah.
00:15:19.000 This is hype, man.
00:15:20.000 Yeah.
00:15:21.000 I'm Tucker's silk or diamond.
00:15:23.000 I don't know who's who.
00:15:25.000 In the soothing banality of HR department clichés.
00:15:28.000 Just pause.
00:15:29.000 Listen here to Mark Zuckerberg.
00:15:30.000 He's saying, we played a little late, but he's saying that they talk about censoring you and taking away your rights of free speech under the soothing banal HR speak, which is what they do.
00:15:42.000 It's very Orwellian.
00:15:43.000 They have this positive spin on it, saying, we're trying to make sure that we only do good and we take away harm and violence.
00:15:52.000 What are you, a doctor in the children's ward of the hospital?
00:15:56.000 That's wonderful.
00:15:57.000 You work with kids with burns?
00:16:00.000 That the death of free speech in America is actually a really positive thing that we all need to get behind.
00:16:07.000 We're taking a more proactive role and making sure partners and developers use our services for good.
00:16:13.000 We're very focused on making sure that our recommendations and discovery services aren't highlighting the Lego blocks.
00:16:19.000 People are repeatedly sharing misinformation or harmful content, and we're working hard to completely remove groups if they exist primarily to violate our policies or do things that are dangerous.
00:16:32.000 Who's he trying to?
00:16:33.000 Wait, they exist solely to violate his policies.
00:16:37.000 That's probably zero groups.
00:16:40.000 Hey, let's start the violate Facebook policies group.
00:16:45.000 Go ahead.
00:16:46.000 Or do things that are dangerous.
00:16:48.000 Who knew fascism could be so chirpy?
00:16:51.000 Groups that do things that are dangerous.
00:16:53.000 What exactly does that mean?
00:16:55.000 Dangerous like hurting other people?
00:16:57.000 Or dangerous as in saying things that Mark Zuckerberg doesn't like or considers bad for business?
00:17:03.000 Well, yesterday we found out Facebook released its latest enemies list.
00:17:06.000 Alex Jones, Milo Yiannopoulos, Paul Joseph Watson, Louis Farrakhan, Laura Loomer, all of them were designated dangerous individuals and banned from Facebook and from its subsidiary, Instagram.
00:17:18.000 Alex Jones' company, InfoWars, was banned as well and described as a dangerous organization.
00:17:23.000 Didn't explain exactly how.
00:17:26.000 How dangerous is InfoWars?
00:17:27.000 Well, Facebook believes it's so dangerous that you can be banned from using the platform, Facebook, just for sharing its content unless you simultaneously denounce it.
00:17:38.000 Let that penetrate for just one moment.
00:17:39.000 Think about it.
00:17:40.000 Just for a second.
00:17:41.000 Mark Zuckerberg is not simply sick.
00:17:44.000 Same with me, a hate figure.
00:17:46.000 If you praise me on Facebook, even if you say on Twitter, I don't know, like everyone talks about these proud boys.
00:17:52.000 I met them.
00:17:53.000 A lot of them are black.
00:17:54.000 They don't seem racist to me.
00:17:56.000 Verboten.
00:17:58.000 No, you're not allowed to defend.
00:18:00.000 We have made up our minds.
00:18:02.000 The decision is final.
00:18:03.000 It's sort of like the opposite of science, you know?
00:18:07.000 It's never changing.
00:18:08.000 Set in stone.
00:18:10.000 And one of the more disturbing things about it is how gleeful the media is about this.
00:18:15.000 You'd think there'd be articles going, whoa, I think we're treading into dangerous territory here.
00:18:21.000 At least a little bit of trepidation, you know?
00:18:25.000 But no, it's gleeful, gleeful reporting.
00:18:31.000 There was an article in Gizmodo.
00:18:34.000 You might have to jump ahead here.
00:18:36.000 And it said, these three people get, five people get banned, right?
00:18:42.000 And the first, Gizmodo, which is supposed to be like a tech site, you think they'd go, oh, tech is getting involved in free speech.
00:18:50.000 And the headline is, later, losers.
00:18:54.000 Dude, you're in the business of speaking.
00:18:59.000 You're in the business of telling stories.
00:19:01.000 You're in the business of information.
00:19:03.000 New parameters have just come up that involve people not telling stories.
00:19:08.000 Aren't you worried?
00:19:09.000 Like if there was a carpenter and it said huge new rules for plumbers, they need new licenses and they have to pay more tax.
00:19:17.000 You'd think the carpenters would be going, hmm, what kind of parameters are they?
00:19:23.000 Who's doing this?
00:19:24.000 How many trades is it affecting?
00:19:26.000 They're coming for you, my friend.
00:19:30.000 And then I saw he likes to comment in the comments.
00:19:34.000 So in that article, there was people expressing some concern, as sane people do.
00:19:40.000 And Matt Novak, beta male, of course, says, you can, like, they say this is totalitarianism, and Matt Novak comes back with, you can ask the same thing about banning any extremist group, from ISIS sympathizers to neo-Nazis.
00:19:56.000 By the way, ISIS is still on Facebook, and so is Hamas.
00:19:59.000 So is Hezbollah.
00:20:01.000 Society gains something by pushing those people to the fringes.
00:20:06.000 Okay?
00:20:07.000 Two, the First Amendment is about Congress, not private companies.
00:20:11.000 Three, yes, quote-unquote nut jobs will flock together, but that doesn't mean you have to give them a platform.
00:20:16.000 Just because there are crazy people yelling and screaming on the public street doesn't mean I have to invite them into my home.
00:20:21.000 See, this is what people do when they want to win an argument.
00:20:23.000 They use very exaggerated metaphors to make you sound crazy.
00:20:29.000 First of all, comparing the people who are banned to ISIS sympathizers and neo-Nazis is insane.
00:20:35.000 He also is talking about this whole free market thing in number two with the First Amendment in Congress.
00:20:41.000 I've said this a million times.
00:20:43.000 It doesn't matter who's doing the oppressing.
00:20:46.000 If it's an angry mob with pitchforks shutting down your company for no good reason and then following some guy they've deemed a hate figure and shutting down that company, that's the same end result.
00:20:57.000 It's still tyranny.
00:20:59.000 If the people didn't think murder was illegal and it was still illegal, you'd be able to kill willy-nilly.
00:21:06.000 If the police saw you doing it, you'd be screwed, but there's going to be no witnesses.
00:21:10.000 It's accepted in this society.
00:21:12.000 So destroying the First Amendment is not about the law.
00:21:15.000 It's not about paper.
00:21:16.000 It's about people.
00:21:17.000 And the people right now don't seem to have the First Amendment.
00:21:22.000 They don't seem to understand what it is.
00:21:24.000 And the last analogy where he's like, it's like inviting someone into your home.
00:21:30.000 These groups have dominated the national conversation.
00:21:34.000 These big tech companies have taken over the whole, they've monopolized it.
00:21:38.000 So it's not like I'm dying to get into this one little restaurant or this one comedy club.
00:21:43.000 I cannot speak on the same national platform that everyone else can.
00:21:47.000 And I built my company with that platform under the understanding that that's what it was for.
00:21:55.000 I think for the very same reasons, a lot of students with horrible student debt have a class action case against these schools because there was an understanding that the diploma meant something and it goes back generations.
00:22:07.000 And you've just made that diploma totally worthless and these kids are stuck with quarter mill debt.
00:22:12.000 But we also saw this sort of gleeful later losers when the Poynter Institute came up with this list of 515 outlets blacklisted.
00:22:24.000 That included Breitbart News.
00:22:25.000 And it's all that one woman you see there, Assistant Professor Melissa Zimdar, as I talked about on my podcast.
00:22:32.000 She's written academic papers such as Watching Our Weights, The Consequences and Contradictions of Televising Fatness in the Obesity Epidemic, and Having It Both Ways, Two and a Half Men, Entourage and The Televising of Juvenile Post-Feminist Masculinity.
00:22:47.000 Just, I can speak academic.
00:22:49.000 I'll translate it for you.
00:22:52.000 There's no obesity epidemic.
00:22:53.000 It's cool to be fat.
00:22:55.000 And these shows, these pro-dude shows, these bro shows are promoting toxic masculinity and hurting women.
00:23:05.000 It's ironic that the only women that are really hurting in her two papers are the fat people that she's allowing to starve themselves, I mean, feed themselves to death.
00:23:15.000 But so she put out this paper and she was attacked.
00:23:19.000 She picks fights with all these companies and says, shut down, you know, Breitbart and Washington, Free Beacon, and all these right-wing sites.
00:23:28.000 And then they come back at her and go, why is one academic, Ivory Tower academic, shutting us down with all these threats of boycotts?
00:23:39.000 And then she just pulls the paper.
00:23:41.000 She's done this twice now.
00:23:42.000 So this is back in 2016.
00:23:44.000 Pointer retracts list of unreliable news sources.
00:23:47.000 What date is that?
00:23:47.000 I can't see the date.
00:23:49.000 Published.
00:23:50.000 Oh, 2019.
00:23:50.000 Okay.
00:23:51.000 So this is the second time she's done this.
00:23:53.000 She keeps poking the lion, and then when it goes, she goes, oh, forget it, forget it.
00:23:58.000 And it's, so there's two funny things going on here.
00:23:58.000 Again and again.
00:24:00.000 One is a pussified leftist picking a fight with the right and then cowering in fear when they fight back.
00:24:06.000 And two, the press dancing and preening every time it comes out.
00:24:12.000 Look at this New York Mag article.
00:24:14.000 Now, this is the first time she put it out.
00:24:16.000 An extremely helpful list of fake and misleading news sites to watch out for.
00:24:21.000 Don't you see that's the same as the article that said later losers?
00:24:25.000 Like New York Mag, you could be on that list.
00:24:29.000 But they won't be because they toe the company line.
00:24:34.000 I think it's time we got to our pal Alex.
00:24:34.000 All right.
00:24:36.000 Now, this is a pre-recorded interview.
00:24:39.000 So you will be shocked to see that I am not wearing this shirt and I'm not in this location.
00:24:45.000 But this is right after Alex Jones was banned.
00:24:47.000 And one thing I don't think I included in the interview, maybe I did, was this thing about WhatsApp where Oliver Darcy at CNN said, we think Alex might be using WhatsApp.
00:24:59.000 You know, that app that British people use.
00:25:01.000 It's like Telegram or Signal or something.
00:25:03.000 And we're currently looking into it.
00:25:06.000 It's a communications app, just like texting.
00:25:09.000 And he doesn't use it.
00:25:12.000 But he better not be because Oliver Darcy is in charge.
00:25:16.000 CNN's Oliver Darcy is in charge with who can communicate and to whom.
00:25:22.000 Anyway, take it away, Al.
00:25:25.000 Thinking about my boy Chris Farley.
00:25:30.000 Alex Jones.
00:25:32.000 Gavin McGinnis, good to be here with you.
00:25:34.000 We're both very, very naughty people.
00:25:36.000 We're banned.
00:25:37.000 We're verboten.
00:25:38.000 We're verboten.
00:25:40.000 We're verboten more than any other group, any other hate group, any other.
00:25:46.000 You could, honestly, I don't think murderers get treated like this.
00:25:49.000 I don't think you'd be banned from Twitter or Facebook if you had interviewed a murderer on your show.
00:25:57.000 And it's because we're popular.
00:25:58.000 We're populist.
00:25:59.000 We're Pro-America, and we're winning.
00:26:02.000 And so that's why we are absolutely the enemy of the establishment.
00:26:07.000 It's glaringly obvious to anyone who does, just sit down on your couch and think about it for a second.
00:26:13.000 Like they say, Alex Jones was banned for Sandy Hook.
00:26:18.000 That was seven years previous to the banning.
00:26:21.000 Or they go, well, he's banned now.
00:26:23.000 What do you do now?
00:26:25.000 He had Gavin McInnes on his show.
00:26:31.000 And that was weeks and weeks ago.
00:26:34.000 Oh, that's the new thing.
00:26:35.000 They go, Gavin McInnes, he created Proud Boys.
00:26:38.000 And the FBI said they're a hate group, though the FBI said they never said that.
00:26:41.000 And so anyone that ever, if a Proud Boy looks at you, you're going to go to prison.
00:26:45.000 Yeah.
00:26:46.000 Well, I suspect the SPLC is behind this.
00:26:49.000 I think the SPLC went into Facebook.
00:26:52.000 This is just conjecture.
00:26:54.000 Oh, no, it's not.
00:26:55.000 Actually, they're the ones creating.
00:26:56.000 I actually have the article.
00:26:57.000 They're the ones creating the blacklist.
00:26:58.000 They're actually the ones that hire the 20,000 people that work at Facebook.
00:27:02.000 They've actually created the community human rights boards that are now going to be inside, it's being reported by the Associated Press, inside MasterCard.
00:27:10.000 So if individuals visit and buy things they're not supposed to, then they get in trouble.
00:27:14.000 So they're watching what you do with your credit card now, Gavin.
00:27:18.000 And it gets better.
00:27:19.000 They're also coming out.
00:27:21.000 They told people in a press release at Facebook that if you talk about Alex Jones without it being in a disparaging light, explicitly condemning him or his content, the name Alex Jones or Infowars.com, you will be punished and repeat offenders will be banned.
00:27:40.000 So they're telling their users, their 2 billion plus users, you do not say the name of Voldemort 2.0.
00:27:48.000 Exactly.
00:27:48.000 And they never say, well, what did he say on the show?
00:27:51.000 Like, say you have someone alt-right, like Richard Spencer, and he's on the show and you say, everyone, you got to listen to this guy.
00:27:57.000 Everything he says is totally valid, and I totally love him.
00:28:01.000 I've had Richard Spencer on my show.
00:28:02.000 I have him to debate him.
00:28:04.000 said, your ideas of white nationalism are crazy.
00:28:07.000 And, you know, Richard Spencer's behind Yeah, I've seen your debates.
00:28:12.000 They go, yeah, McGuinness who has Spencer on.
00:28:15.000 Well, yeah, I mean, how could CNN have David Duke on?
00:28:17.000 But see, it's all playing games.
00:28:20.000 Well, and that's glaringly obvious when you look at it because you think this, what's really going on here is the SBLC gave them this list, said, Milo, you got to put a black guy in there like Farrakhan so they think it's balanced.
00:28:31.000 But find something on all of them.
00:28:33.000 And the things they came up with, as usual, are totally pathetic, totally transparent.
00:28:39.000 What's really going on here is the SBLC has been assigned with making sure Trump doesn't win in 2020.
00:28:47.000 So anyone who makes him look popular, anyone who helps him has to be silenced.
00:28:52.000 Well, I was about to say, Gavin, you were number one on CR-TV.
00:28:56.000 And then Beck doesn't like that anyway.
00:28:57.000 See how to be taken off.
00:28:58.000 I'm number one on everything I do.
00:29:00.000 So it's called being successful.
00:29:02.000 Beyond all the hate talk and all the crap and defeating Hillary, they don't like us because we're popular, because people like us, because we're not scripted.
00:29:12.000 I mean, I just did earlier today, Newsmax TV, God bless them, Chris Ruddy, all those guys, good guys.
00:29:18.000 But man, they wouldn't stop with like all the cliches, all the things I didn't even say.
00:29:24.000 And it's just, and so the left is able to accuse somebody of something, and then all the other shows, when they get you on, well, Gavin, do you want to decry Spencer?
00:29:34.000 Well, everybody knows you didn't do anything.
00:29:36.000 Why should we repeat that and prove ourselves to the left so no one attacks me that when I have you on, I've now, now, Gavin, tell people you don't love Hitler.
00:29:45.000 Exactly.
00:29:46.000 Now, Gavin, tell people it's a load of crap, man.
00:29:49.000 The Democrats are the problem.
00:29:51.000 They're the ones that are damn demons on the Tri-Com payroll.
00:29:53.000 So we need to stop letting them set the agenda.
00:29:56.000 It's the scarlet letter.
00:29:58.000 I remember talking to you a long time ago about, no, I was actually talking to Joe Rogan about you.
00:30:02.000 And I just done Joe Rogan's show.
00:30:05.000 And he said the numbers for your talk were alarming.
00:30:10.000 Like, take politics out of it.
00:30:11.000 Talk to a technician who works with TriCasters at the board, an engineer.
00:30:16.000 And I think when you add up Facebook, YouTube, everything, it was to the tune of 300 million.
00:30:23.000 Now, Anderson Cooper does a live chat on Facebook.
00:30:27.000 He's lucky to get 5,000.
00:30:30.000 The evidence is overwhelming here.
00:30:32.000 The problem is popularity.
00:30:35.000 Well, I mean, take Joe.
00:30:37.000 I was just on his podcast again.
00:30:38.000 You know, they threatened him not to have me on.
00:30:39.000 And, you know, they're calling him a white supremacist now for having me on.
00:30:42.000 I go on the show, and they immediately shadow ban it.
00:30:46.000 But if you added it all together, it had like 50 million views just on those platforms they could register.
00:30:51.000 And of course, that's shadow banned 50 million.
00:30:53.000 Elon Musk is the only thing ever did a little bit bigger.
00:30:56.000 So his second and third biggest podcast for me on, and I know you were popular on there.
00:31:00.000 But again, leftists go on there.
00:31:02.000 It's like a million viewers.
00:31:03.000 But then they just go on and pontificate and tell Joe about we need to get five-year-old sex blockers to make them other sexes.
00:31:10.000 And it's so real.
00:31:11.000 And we need men that are powerlifters that say they're women.
00:31:14.000 It's so beautiful.
00:31:15.000 And it's just like fantasy land, cuckoo land.
00:31:19.000 And exactly.
00:31:19.000 And now the sharks are circling Joe.
00:31:21.000 Because let me tell you, all these globalists, like you said, nothing against people that have drama degrees.
00:31:27.000 But all of them, when you run into them, they either have a drama degree, they either have a full degree in theater, or they have a psychology degree because they want to be high priest.
00:31:35.000 And they literally think they're supposed to be the ruling class, and they think everything is like a drama fantasy land.
00:31:41.000 And they just don't know what to deal with with somebody like you or other folks that come in like a wrecking ball and just don't play their games.
00:31:49.000 So look, it's all destined to fail.
00:31:51.000 But I asked you like three years ago, I said, when do we hit peak liberalism?
00:31:55.000 You said, probably never.
00:31:56.000 It's just going to get worse.
00:31:58.000 Yeah, I think you're right.
00:31:59.000 It just keeps getting more and more clownworld, more and more crazy.
00:32:03.000 And the thing I always loved about America was the back and forth, the Gore Vidal with William F. Buckley.
00:32:10.000 That wasn't even that, you could find traces of that five, six years ago.
00:32:13.000 Before Trump, it was still possible to have different ideas.
00:32:18.000 Now, there's two things going on here.
00:32:20.000 One is they're saying, these guys are evil.
00:32:22.000 These guys have crazy ideas.
00:32:23.000 They have to be extinguished.
00:32:24.000 And we say, no, no, no, you got my ideas wrong.
00:32:26.000 I never said that.
00:32:27.000 That's one thing.
00:32:28.000 But the other part of it is me saying, You know what?
00:32:31.000 Say some people do have crazy ideas.
00:32:33.000 What's the matter with that?
00:32:35.000 Let a thousand flowers bloom, as Mao said.
00:32:38.000 Oh, no, I totally agree.
00:32:40.000 And if you look at the left, they tricked the Western Christian Society, which was a good thing, so they were tricking us, to not be racist and all this.
00:32:48.000 So we were so good, we went along with that.
00:32:51.000 Now they've double-crossed.
00:32:52.000 They're teaching minorities to be racist.
00:32:54.000 They've got New York Times board members that say whites are goblins that live in holes, and she can't wait till we're all dead.
00:32:59.000 And Ilhan Omar says, you know, get rid of white people.
00:33:05.000 We project onto all these people, a lot of great black people, you name it, but we still project because somebody has dark skin that they're this high and mighty, loving, good person.
00:33:14.000 No, they're just like everybody else.
00:33:16.000 And the left has told them, you be racist, you be hateful, you be bad.
00:33:21.000 So white folks have said, hey, open the borders up.
00:33:23.000 Kumbaya, let's love everybody.
00:33:25.000 But a bunch of leftist white people are playing race card and all this and then telling us we can't even defend ourselves while they organize the third world into, you know, like the last episode of Game of Thrones, the zombie invading force.
00:33:41.000 What's the matter with conspiracy theories?
00:33:44.000 To conspire is to drum up a plan.
00:33:48.000 Wasn't Watergate a conspiracy theory before it was proven true?
00:33:54.000 You spout theories all day.
00:33:57.000 Yes, some of them are false.
00:33:59.000 We just saw, exactly.
00:34:00.000 We just saw, I was the first to say because we actually had evidence, that the whole Russia thing was made up.
00:34:05.000 They were illegally spying on Trump.
00:34:06.000 They were using it to overthrow his election.
00:34:08.000 Now that's all confirmed.
00:34:10.000 I said the day it happened, I was on the radio on a Sunday, and I said, I do a Sunday show at 46 p.m.
00:34:17.000 And I said, I think Jesse Smollett staged this.
00:34:19.000 I don't think at 2.30 in the morning, at 20 below zero, two white guys put a rope around your neck and do all this.
00:34:26.000 I said, I think this is staged.
00:34:28.000 I have a right to say it.
00:34:29.000 It could have turned out to be really weird.
00:34:31.000 The guy found a leprechaun riding a unicorn and there were flying monkeys or whatever.
00:34:36.000 Maybe two white dudes are hiding at 2.30 in the morning in Chicago with 50 mile an hour winds, 23 below zero.
00:34:42.000 They put a rope around your neck and say all these things.
00:34:45.000 It's obviously ridiculous.
00:34:47.000 It's obviously not true.
00:34:49.000 It's obviously BS.
00:34:50.000 But I said, I think it's bull.
00:34:53.000 It was bull.
00:34:54.000 Now, same thing goes for WMDs in Iraq.
00:34:57.000 Same thing goes for saying babies are in incubators with their brains bashed out in 1990 to launch that war.
00:35:02.000 And so other people questioned Sandy Hook.
00:35:05.000 I looked at the theories.
00:35:06.000 They went into my timeline and made it my whole career and then just keep saying, Jones won't stop talking about Sandy Hook.
00:35:13.000 And I never even hardly talked about it, but 10 times.
00:35:15.000 And again, that's the hoax they're running so they can then, the lawyers, the Democrats, re-invoke Sandy Hook, re-invoke dead kids in my name.
00:35:24.000 That's all they're doing is hijacking a popular public figure and projecting their lies onto it and then telling all of us you can't question our official stories when look at not just Jesse Smallet, the Covington kids or any of these other events or Belazi Ford and most of the women saying they made it up, but they'd go, it's okay.
00:35:44.000 He's bad.
00:35:45.000 He's a Trump supporter.
00:35:46.000 So we're just going to say Kavanaugh raped us in the ass, you know, 30 years ago on a boat.
00:35:52.000 He was never on a boat.
00:35:53.000 He didn't do it.
00:35:54.000 It's made up.
00:35:55.000 They're lying.
00:35:56.000 And it's normal to ask questions.
00:35:58.000 It's really obviously disingenuous.
00:35:59.000 Tucker Carlson was on Bubba the Love Sponge maybe 12 years ago.
00:36:05.000 And he was saying things like, yeah, I'm a trust fun kid.
00:36:09.000 I beat my servants with my gold-tipped cane.
00:36:13.000 I mean, it couldn't be a clearer joke.
00:36:16.000 And Tucker said, I'm on TV an hour every night.
00:36:20.000 You can tune in and hear what I have to say.
00:36:23.000 You don't have to go back to 12 years ago, find a joke on a radio show and pretend that's what I believe.
00:36:30.000 Well, that's exactly it.
00:36:31.000 And used to, I had fun with hyperbole, and you do it too.
00:36:34.000 And I should keep doing it, but I've actually quit doing it because I'll say the wildest stuff like, yeah, I had sex with 20 dudes last week.
00:36:41.000 You know, and they're like, oh my God, he had sex with 20 dudes.
00:36:43.000 No, it's obviously a joke.
00:36:46.000 You can't even discuss, like, say someone said the N-word, and I know I no longer say that word in any context.
00:36:52.000 And you'll say, yeah, he went up to a cop and called them the N-word 10 times.
00:36:55.000 They will take that N-word and make it something that you believe.
00:36:59.000 So the scary thing about it is it's making us all speak in this gray robot monotone where even out of context, it sounds funny.
00:37:08.000 Oh, you're right.
00:37:09.000 It's making us not be spontaneous.
00:37:11.000 Yeah.
00:37:11.000 And it's making us put a governor on what am I going to say?
00:37:14.000 Because sometimes I'll like do an imitation of a redneck racist.
00:37:18.000 Right.
00:37:18.000 I don't even, those are funny.
00:37:20.000 Like, I don't like them blank people.
00:37:23.000 And I just did it again.
00:37:24.000 They take that out and put it on the damn news and say that I mean that.
00:37:28.000 You know, when I was on your show and I was pretty down after having my entire life flushed down the toilet, you said, don't give up.
00:37:35.000 And I'm back now.
00:37:36.000 I've got a new thing going on about to launch.
00:37:39.000 And I feel like that's one of the things that really pissed them off is they said, we had almost destroyed this guy.
00:37:47.000 We did all that hard work.
00:37:48.000 And then you come along, pick him up and dust him off and say, get back out there.
00:37:53.000 Let's punish him.
00:37:54.000 Well, Gavin, you're not going to be happy rolling over to them.
00:37:57.000 And I get taking some time off.
00:37:58.000 I want to too.
00:37:58.000 In fact, I would have, here's a big secret.
00:38:00.000 When Trump got elected, I thought they're going to come after me.
00:38:02.000 But I said, if they don't, but I said, my gut is they're going to really go crazy.
00:38:06.000 I'm going to cut back to a few days a week, hire some other crew to promote libertarian nationalist ideas.
00:38:10.000 But you either do this 24-7 or you don't.
00:38:14.000 And I've been burnt out for a while.
00:38:15.000 But now I can't, now I'm seven days a week.
00:38:17.000 Now they're not going to make me stop and bring in this authoritarianism.
00:38:21.000 I didn't even get into Facebook.
00:38:23.000 They put a press release out, brother, saying you will not say Alex Jones' name or Infowars.com's name or you will be punished or banned, repeat offenders.
00:38:34.000 It reads like science fiction joke, dystopia.
00:38:37.000 It said, but if you want to say, quote, unless the post is emphatically condemning Jones or Infowars.
00:38:45.000 So they just said, you can only say his name if you attack him and then we boost the comments.
00:38:50.000 Well, that's been going on for a while.
00:38:52.000 So I watched all these other talk show hosts, all these other, quote, people, a lot of which I interviewed, not you, you've been a good guy, the First Amendment, all turn against me and do hit pieces so that YouTube would promote them.
00:39:07.000 And there are people that have worked in this office, who I produce films with, that I paid a lot of money, who I was nice to, who I let even screw me over, who now have YouTubes every day attacking me and now are YouTube stars monetizing lying about me.
00:39:22.000 You talk about YouTube Brutus, man.
00:39:24.000 It's like, whoa, dude.
00:39:26.000 And so it's like payoffs.
00:39:29.000 It's digital payoffs that Google and Facebook and Twitter, if you do what they want, if you lie about people, if you do this stuff, we will give you money.
00:39:37.000 I mean, this is sick.
00:39:39.000 So there's no amount of money to make me give up my soul and my integrity.
00:39:43.000 Right.
00:39:44.000 And it's not even like some Christian thing.
00:39:45.000 I'm a Christian, but like, oh, I'm such a goody tussu.
00:39:47.000 No, no, this is a raging.
00:39:49.000 I'm not selling out.
00:39:50.000 There's not any question about it.
00:39:52.000 You know, it's like, this is my whole identity.
00:39:54.000 All you do is piss me off.
00:39:55.000 You're not making me back off.
00:39:56.000 You're making me work 20 hours a day.
00:39:58.000 Does that make sense?
00:39:59.000 They leave us no choice.
00:40:01.000 We have no choice but to fight back.
00:40:04.000 If we lay over, we'd never be able to live with ourselves.
00:40:06.000 Our kids would be disgusted.
00:40:09.000 It's like Braveheart.
00:40:10.000 The English keep poking us and poking us and poking us.
00:40:13.000 Eventually, we have to fight back.
00:40:15.000 Eventually, we have no choice but to fight back.
00:40:17.000 We're fighting back.
00:40:18.000 Exactly.
00:40:18.000 And they think we're like them.
00:40:19.000 They had Oliver Darcy that helps run all the censorship on CNN here.
00:40:22.000 Stay pulled the clip up.
00:40:23.000 And he actually says, oh, WhatsApp, I guess Facebook bought WhatsApp is like Signal.
00:40:28.000 I guess you can send text messages and you can send text messages and call people.
00:40:34.000 It's like digital.
00:40:35.000 I don't have it on my phone.
00:40:36.000 He goes, we're looking to see if it's on his phone.
00:40:38.000 So we'll ban him from that too.
00:40:41.000 Because, you know, they elected the president of Brazil with that.
00:40:45.000 They're now wanting to block people's text messages and phone calls.
00:40:49.000 And they admit that Facebook is going to be in your private chats now, in your instant messages, reading what those.
00:40:56.000 And if you're bad, we'll ban you.
00:40:59.000 I mean, so now they're going to control who you can talk to in private phone calls?
00:41:06.000 Alex, I hope people see the abuse you get, the abuse conservatives get, and I hope it wakes them up to the fact that we are losing the fabric of this country.
00:41:14.000 We're losing what made America great.
00:41:17.000 Well, that leads me to this.
00:41:18.000 I like Trump on a lot of fronts, but man, you know, sure, he tweeted out that Paul Watson got manned.
00:41:24.000 Poor Paul Watson, he's done nothing on Instagram and on Facebook.
00:41:29.000 And, you know, the Democrats were bitching.
00:41:31.000 Hey, he's pointing out that Joe Biden had brain surgery and is slurring his words.
00:41:35.000 We can't have that.
00:41:36.000 God, it's the number one post.
00:41:37.000 Ban him.
00:41:38.000 And so they've crapped all over themselves.
00:41:40.000 They're afraid.
00:41:40.000 And Trump just sits up there and is like, oh, my numbers are so good.
00:41:44.000 My polls.
00:41:45.000 And I like Trump, but man, he has a responsibility to do something.
00:41:50.000 Yeah, stand up to tyranny, Trump.
00:41:52.000 We need you over here.
00:41:53.000 And I wouldn't mind a walking.
00:41:54.000 What do you think you should do?
00:41:55.000 I mean, Section 230 violations, all the illegal spying Facebook's doing.
00:42:01.000 Yeah, let's see some justice for a change.
00:42:04.000 Alex, thanks for coming on the show.
00:42:05.000 Always a pleasure to talk to you.
00:42:06.000 And you're an inspiration.
00:42:07.000 And thank you so much.
00:42:09.000 When I was at the bottom of my life, my career, you dusted me off and you said, don't give up.
00:42:15.000 I really appreciate it.
00:42:16.000 Gavin, you're awesome.
00:42:17.000 I run people everywhere.
00:42:18.000 They go, I wish you were still in there, Alex.
00:42:19.000 I'm at Infowars.com and newswars.com.
00:42:21.000 Our own videos, our own audio.
00:42:23.000 We're hosting it all.
00:42:24.000 And I hope you'll come on my show next week.
00:42:25.000 Have a great weekend, my friend.
00:42:26.000 Right on, dude.
00:42:27.000 Cheers.
00:42:28.000 Thank you, bye.
00:42:29.000 How the hell is that making you so sad?
00:42:31.000 Then he laughed and said, You did it.
00:42:34.000 You got rid of Alex Jones.
00:42:36.000 You got rid of Laura Loomer.
00:42:37.000 You got rid of Milo.
00:42:38.000 You got rid of me.
00:42:39.000 Good work.
00:42:40.000 That's going to make the world a much safer place.
00:42:43.000 Because what I was doing with Proud Boys is I was just sort of like Thanos with my gauntlet.
00:42:50.000 And I would just say, go forth, Proud Boys, and killeth the Muslim and the trans.
00:42:58.000 And just women, just slap women.
00:43:01.000 Meanwhile, gangs in New York are doing that.
00:43:04.000 I think it's either the Bloods or Dominicans Don't Play DDP, but you have to eat someone's lunch to be initiated into the gang.
00:43:12.000 Now, eating a lunch is cutting someone's face, and they should be a stranger, just some lady walking home.
00:43:17.000 So there are actual gangs in the suburbs of New York, but you never hear the hate has no home here.
00:43:23.000 People talk about those.
00:43:24.000 Their concern is patriots who defend themselves against Antifa.
00:43:32.000 Anyway, that's enough serious talk.
00:43:33.000 Let's look deep inside my mailbag.
00:43:38.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
00:43:42.000 Let's turn our eyes together's mailbag.
00:43:48.000 Let me touch it.
00:43:49.000 Boy, you really work hard on something when it revolves around you, huh?
00:43:53.000 It just happened to work out that way.
00:43:56.000 You spent, like I can tell, you spent hours looking at your own face.
00:44:00.000 Yeah, you know.
00:44:03.000 Oh, my eyebrows.
00:44:04.000 I forgot to make my eyebrows sad after my dad disappears.
00:44:06.000 That's an important detail.
00:44:08.000 All right, so this is a link that was sent.
00:44:11.000 You'll have to click on it because I don't have it printed out.
00:44:13.000 Maybe you might even have to read it.
00:44:16.000 This side's much curlier than this side.
00:44:19.000 Stop fixing your hair.
00:44:26.000 Can you pull up the letter, please?
00:44:27.000 Smartass?
00:44:28.000 Yep.
00:44:29.000 Oh, this is a long one.
00:44:30.000 All right.
00:44:31.000 Every Easter, my family gets together, and this year, my sister brought home her boyfriend.
00:44:34.000 Now, I've already read this letter, and it says, my sister is dating Coxilla.
00:44:40.000 Coxilla, right?
00:44:42.000 And he lists all their reasons why.
00:44:44.000 He walked in wearing sandals, caught me staring at them, and proudly proclaimed, they're hemp, organic hemp, obviously.
00:44:49.000 Saw me watching a program about D-Day and blurted out, ugh, why are we always like bombing places?
00:44:54.000 Asked my sister to peel an apple and cut it into slices because the apple skin hurts his mouth.
00:44:59.000 When my mother, who has been cooking for a family of seven for over three decades, asked him if she liked the meat-free lasagna she had to make from scratch because he didn't bother to tell her he's a vegetarian until an hour before dinner, he replied with, yeah, not bad.
00:45:12.000 I actually like to use coconut cream.
00:45:13.000 I'll teach you.
00:45:14.000 In that typical liberal smug tone.
00:45:16.000 Wow.
00:45:17.000 Five, after dinner, while I was helping my mother with the dishes, which he and my sister said they would do, liberals promising but not delivering, he saunters into the kitchen, sees me filling the sink with water, and says, hey, leave some for the fish, right?
00:45:29.000 With a smirk that made me physically unwell.
00:45:32.000 Other highlights included near constant checking of his phone, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:45:38.000 He waited to use the bathroom because he preferred to sit.
00:45:42.000 The day's only silver lining was hearing my mother tell my father how beautiful my sister and her boyfriend's kids would be, and my father, a stoic man who I had never heard berate anyone his entire life, telling her not to get her hopes up because getting a girl pregnant requires a pair of testicles, honey.
00:46:00.000 Nice.
00:46:01.000 Now you were having a fun laugh throughout that letter.
00:46:04.000 I have been cursed with a bullshit detector.
00:46:04.000 Yeah.
00:46:09.000 And I smell bullshit.
00:46:12.000 Why?
00:46:13.000 Because you can list those things that are.
00:46:15.000 It's too perfect.
00:46:17.000 I don't know.
00:46:18.000 It's all building up to that joke at the end, which I bet is from a movie.
00:46:22.000 And vegetarian lasagna an hour before dinner.
00:46:26.000 And that's the crunch zone before Thanksgiving where you're running around doing 50 things.
00:46:30.000 Now you're going to make a whole new dish?
00:46:31.000 Vegetarian lasagna is really...
00:46:36.000 I'm sure vegetarian lasagna is a nightmare to make.
00:46:39.000 Yeah, this might be like, you know when Anthony would do the Seinfeld episodes and try to pretend.
00:46:44.000 Yeah, he'd take something from a movie and pretend it happened to him.
00:46:47.000 Yeah.
00:46:47.000 And it got sent to me as a Reddit link, and then someone else actually sent me the whole story as a personal email, which I thought, well, that's unusual.
00:46:56.000 You're the same guy that's on Reddit that sent me the email.
00:47:01.000 I don't know.
00:47:02.000 And the organic hemp, it's just way too much.
00:47:04.000 The apple skin hurting your mouth.
00:47:06.000 Sorry, dudes.
00:47:08.000 Nice try.
00:47:10.000 All right, now let's end with a funny video.
00:47:14.000 An FV, as they say.
00:47:16.000 Yes.
00:47:16.000 Wait, I got to check.
00:47:17.000 I came up with a good slogan to end the show that I forgot about.
00:47:19.000 Let me see if it's on my phone while you find it.
00:47:22.000 Oh, it's in the email, yeah.
00:47:23.000 Oh, I sent it to you?
00:47:24.000 You did.
00:47:25.000 Oh, good.
00:47:27.000 Let's hit this video first.
00:47:31.000 No pun intended.
00:47:33.000 You'll see.
00:47:35.000 Okay, this is awesome.
00:47:40.000 I'm scared, though, that if I have you read out our new slogan, you're going to ruin it.
00:47:44.000 And I don't have it with me.
00:47:46.000 Okay.
00:47:46.000 How are we going to do this?
00:47:49.000 I could email it to you, or I could whisper it in your ear.
00:47:49.000 We're live.
00:47:53.000 Yeah, come whisper it in my ear.
00:47:54.000 That's funnier.
00:47:55.000 Okay, so first, let's watch these two videos.
00:47:57.000 They made me laugh my head off.
00:47:58.000 This is a woman trying to kill her boyfriend.
00:48:00.000 I assume he cheated on her or he dumped her.
00:48:02.000 It's usually when they dump you that it's usually when you dump them that they really lose it.
00:48:09.000 So he walks out onto the road, as one does late at night when one is broken up with a lady.
00:48:15.000 There he is.
00:48:16.000 Do that.
00:48:16.000 There he goes.
00:48:17.000 And he's crossing the road and he goes, well, that was a crazy relationship.
00:48:20.000 I'm glad we're done.
00:48:21.000 Then she sees, wait a minute, she's trying to kill me.
00:48:24.000 Whoa!
00:48:26.000 Now he's running.
00:48:29.000 He's running to her.
00:48:30.000 Okay, I love you.
00:48:31.000 Now Ryan saw that and he goes, that's what I would do.
00:48:33.000 No, dude, that's what you hope you would do.
00:48:36.000 I don't know.
00:48:38.000 You know that woman who jumped on the rabbi at the synagogue shooting and took a bullet and died?
00:48:44.000 You like to say, yeah, I'd probably do something like that.
00:48:46.000 I'd probably have the balls to take a bullet for someone.
00:48:48.000 Yeah, you don't know until you see it.
00:48:50.000 Everyone loves the idea that they'd be a hero and a ninja, but I have a feeling you might just scream and get run over by a car.
00:49:00.000 And look dumb while doing it.
00:49:00.000 Maybe.
00:49:02.000 Yeah.
00:49:03.000 This other one isn't related, but I just had to get it off my chest.
00:49:07.000 It shows you, just wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:49:10.000 It shows you just how good at comedy the Scots are.
00:49:14.000 There are so many things going on with this video, and my favorite part about it is he knows he's about to see the funniest thing in the world, but he knows it's crucial that this guy doesn't look down at the plank he's looking on.
00:49:26.000 So he says, Hunter, I guess the guy's name is Hunter.
00:49:29.000 Hunter, you're a cunt.
00:49:30.000 See, you, Hunter, Hunter's a bastard.
00:49:32.000 So he's, so the guy's like tuning out everything because everything involves someone yelling swears at him.
00:49:38.000 So now he's more oblivious.
00:49:40.000 And that's why this prank works so beautifully.
00:49:44.000 Did you just vape?
00:49:49.000 Job site in the rain.
00:49:50.000 Of course, it's raining in Scotland.
00:49:52.000 It's never not raining.
00:49:55.000 Long build-up here, but it's worth it.
00:49:57.000 And when you send your friends this...
00:49:59.000 Hello, you're a fucking wanker!
00:49:59.000 Hello!
00:50:07.000 Hunter's a prick.
00:50:08.000 Tell Hunter he's coming in now.
00:50:10.000 Fuck you.
00:50:16.000 Disappeared.
00:50:17.000 So go back to the end there.
00:50:19.000 Come in the new means coming now.
00:50:21.000 The new is now.
00:50:24.000 And you can hear him.
00:50:26.000 He knows it's happening.
00:50:28.000 He knows it's been a success.
00:50:29.000 Because the second the guy touches the plank, you know he's not going to go, hey, wait a minute.
00:50:33.000 This appears to have a large cut down the middle.
00:50:38.000 So he already starts cracking up.
00:50:41.000 Fuck you.
00:50:41.000 Fuck you.
00:50:48.000 Wow, that is way too good.
00:50:50.000 Oh, my God.
00:50:51.000 Look at his coffee fucking flying.
00:50:53.000 His coffee explodes.
00:50:57.000 And his hat.
00:50:58.000 His hat.
00:51:01.000 His helmet is doing a dance for about five minutes after he's gone.
00:51:05.000 The helmet has a life of its own.
00:51:07.000 Look, the helmet comes back from the grave.
00:51:09.000 Playing ping ping back and forth between Jesus Christ.
00:51:16.000 All right, we're out of time.
00:51:17.000 We're out of time.
00:51:18.000 But I'd like to end this show with our new motto that we will be doing at the end of every show to inspire you and to show you what we're all about and how serious we are about your life and surviving the clown world.