Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - March 25, 2020


S02E142 - FROM THE BUNKER: CATS [2020-03-25 - S02E142 - FROM THE BUNKER: CATS]


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 17 minutes

Words per Minute

135.19034

Word Count

18,645

Sentence Count

2,496

Misogynist Sentences

167

Hate Speech Sentences

136


Summary

Gavin McInnes and Ryan Higa talk about what they would do if they were the president of the United States. They also talk about how they're going to go back to work after this break, and why they don't really care.


Transcript

00:00:14.000 Hey man, come on in.
00:00:16.000 I don't like seeing those beers because you fucked up the last episode by putting them in autofocus so you can see the beers.
00:00:21.000 And you gotta close the cellar doors behind you.
00:00:24.000 And we still don't know what movie we're gonna watch.
00:00:27.000 What are you thinking?
00:00:29.000 It's between cats and the hunt.
00:00:31.000 Well, you're hunting for the hunt.
00:00:32.000 The hunt is a movie we want to see, but I'm not sure it's funny to watch a movie we want to see.
00:00:38.000 And cats is kind of a cliche.
00:00:40.000 By the way, you just fucked up the whole camera angle because you were worried about the beer you dropped.
00:00:46.000 So that's twice these beers have fucked a show.
00:00:49.000 And actually three times because you were too tired to shoot anything else yesterday.
00:00:55.000 And I think it's because you were Chinese drunk.
00:00:58.000 Because you don't have the enzymes.
00:01:00.000 What do they call it?
00:01:01.000 Red cheeks or something?
00:01:02.000 Asian flush.
00:01:03.000 Asian flush, yes.
00:01:05.000 So anyway, don't talk to me about those beers ever again.
00:01:08.000 Cats or the hunt is what it's come down to.
00:01:10.000 And we won't.
00:01:12.000 Well, I guess you're about to find out.
00:01:16.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
00:01:36.000 He can't untuck the tuck.
00:01:39.000 What if I can make my face Tucker Carlson's face?
00:01:44.000 You have to get very close.
00:01:48.000 Oh, you wouldn't.
00:01:49.000 It's tough.
00:01:51.000 And your mother is not expendable.
00:01:54.000 My mother's not expendable, and your mother's.
00:01:56.000 You know what's going on here, right?
00:01:58.000 Heartstrings?
00:01:59.000 So yesterday Trump said, look, eventually we're going to have to go back to work because I could keep the whole country indoors for a year.
00:02:07.000 There'd be no pandemic.
00:02:08.000 There'd be no jobs, no economy, and people would die from poverty.
00:02:14.000 So I'm not doing that.
00:02:15.000 I'm going to get them out too.
00:02:16.000 And then Cuomo and DeBasio are saying, stop, you're going to kill us.
00:02:20.000 And then there was something trending today on fucking Twitter that said, I'm not dying for Wall Street.
00:02:29.000 But the stance of this show, in case you're curious, is we always thought this was overblown.
00:02:34.000 We're happy to stay in for a couple of weeks.
00:02:36.000 We'll shoot the show from probably Ryan's apartment tomorrow.
00:02:44.000 But after that, I mean, we'll do a week of shows in Ryan's apartment, but after that, we're going back to New York.
00:02:51.000 I'm going back to Cats.
00:02:53.000 We're allowed to because we're media.
00:02:56.000 That's considered an essential service.
00:03:01.000 That is the truth.
00:03:04.000 Okay, so let's do this for the movie tonight.
00:03:10.000 Let's try cats, and if we can't handle it, we'll switch to The Hunt.
00:03:14.000 Do you know The Hunt was written by a guy named Mike?
00:03:19.000 That's his nickname around Hollywood is Mike Hunt.
00:03:23.000 Because that's his seminal movie.
00:03:27.000 And initially they banned Mike Hunt.
00:03:29.000 Mike Hunt.
00:03:30.000 Mike Hunt took the movie down.
00:03:33.000 Because of the name?
00:03:34.000 No, because they were worried that they were glorifying the violence.
00:03:39.000 Glorifying violence directed towards Republicans.
00:03:43.000 But people are seeing it as a parody of the liberal view.
00:03:48.000 Tucker Carlson has, I'm not sure how much I should say, but Tucker Carlson is well versed in hunting his own game and surviving in the woods and going off the grid.
00:03:59.000 He's basically Jesse Ventura.
00:04:01.000 I'm off the grid.
00:04:03.000 So this is not interesting to him.
00:04:06.000 Same with Kumia.
00:04:07.000 Bowie, yeah.
00:04:09.000 Same with Kumia and same with me.
00:04:10.000 Not as far as survival instincts.
00:04:12.000 Well, Kumia is prepared for World War III.
00:04:15.000 But Tucker and Kumia and I have all been vilified by our neighbors, had our addresses doxxed.
00:04:22.000 We've had our property vandalized.
00:04:26.000 So this is like, come at me, bro.
00:04:29.000 I'm actually enjoying it.
00:04:31.000 I could do months of this.
00:04:33.000 You can defend yourself against the pirates.
00:04:35.000 Yeah, I got a huge house.
00:04:37.000 This hasn't affected the show yet, so it hasn't affected income.
00:04:40.000 We got a trampoline in the back.
00:04:42.000 I enjoy my children.
00:04:43.000 School's fucking retarded anyway, so what are they missing?
00:04:47.000 So my daughter was being asked to research Fidel Castro today, and I told her everything about Cuba and Castro and how evil socialism is.
00:04:56.000 And I explained that the reason we have this problem right now is because of communism.
00:05:02.000 Communism starved the Chinese.
00:05:04.000 The Chinese were forced to eat gross shit like snakes and bats.
00:05:10.000 And God had a plan for that.
00:05:12.000 He goes, don't play me and don't try to feed people or I'll make you starve.
00:05:17.000 And if you start eating garbage, well, my little plan for that, my little catch for that, you know how if you fuck your sister, you make a retard.
00:05:25.000 The check and balance for eating garbage is a pandemic.
00:05:31.000 So the fact that so many Chinese people were dying was kind of nature's way of saying, yeah, we're not really fans of Wuhan.
00:05:38.000 Now that's problematic because now you're saying AIDS was God's plan.
00:05:45.000 I mean.
00:05:45.000 If you talk like that.
00:05:47.000 He's no stranger to punishing man.
00:05:49.000 He's had a relationship with mankind.
00:05:51.000 He's a little harsh in the First Testament.
00:05:57.000 He was really punishing wanton sex.
00:06:01.000 He was punishing fucking, like my friend Craig who got AIDS.
00:06:06.000 He got at a circuit party fucking for 36 hours straight on meth.
00:06:10.000 It's not like he had a boyfriend and then we had him.
00:06:12.000 He wasn't gardening with his boyfriend Pierre.
00:06:16.000 Right.
00:06:16.000 And smooching him on the lips occasionally.
00:06:19.000 He was a little greedy.
00:06:20.000 He was wearing his ass out.
00:06:21.000 And I said to him, dude, if bugs fucked for 36 hours straight on meth, I'm sure there'd be some, like, yeah, their little fly vaginas wouldn't fall off.
00:06:31.000 Dude, Have you ever seen a fly's penis?
00:06:34.000 Yeah.
00:06:35.000 Because of you, you told me to look it up, and it's a corkscrew type thing.
00:06:40.000 Oh, it's everything.
00:06:41.000 It's barbs.
00:06:41.000 It's sort of like you took paint and then you put a blob of it, watercolor, on a piece of paper, and then you took a straw and just went like it just goes kerra.
00:06:52.000 That's the sound it looks like.
00:06:54.000 We should bring that up in tomorrow's show.
00:06:55.000 So tomorrow's show, we're going to build a mini studio.
00:06:58.000 We stole the TriCaster from the office in Manhattan.
00:07:01.000 We did a like, dung, dung, dung, dung, dung, dung, dung, dung.
00:07:05.000 Don't need to ring that.
00:07:06.000 Doo-doo!
00:07:07.000 Doo-da-doo!
00:07:08.000 Well, we weren't supposed to be in the building.
00:07:10.000 Yeah, but it's if they, like, what are you doing?
00:07:13.000 Stealing our own shit?
00:07:15.000 Well, don't.
00:07:16.000 That's my problem with public freakout on Reddit now.
00:07:16.000 There's other people there.
00:07:20.000 It's all Indian police beating people for being outside.
00:07:25.000 And what is like police in Costa Rica and police in China and police in all these shithole countries?
00:07:33.000 And you're like, I don't fucking care.
00:07:34.000 Can you show me some fights in parking lots, guys?
00:07:36.000 Yeah, I saw a good one with two drunk chicks.
00:07:39.000 I'll show you it.
00:07:40.000 They're two sisters.
00:07:41.000 Oh, what race?
00:07:43.000 Actually, you know what?
00:07:45.000 Somebody sent it to me, and I haven't actually watched it, but I know it's a good one.
00:07:49.000 Because this person does not send bad stuff, frankly.
00:07:52.000 Frankly, ear retards.
00:07:54.000 But I'm guessing white.
00:07:56.000 I was thinking today, I watched a few black girl fights in the hood.
00:08:00.000 Women of color, if you're watching this right now, and I'm sure there's one, if you're going to get in a fight in the hood, wear a bathing cap, right?
00:08:10.000 So stuff all your actual hair in a bathing cap, then put a wig on top of that, and then another wig on top of that.
00:08:19.000 Jesus.
00:08:20.000 Because 90% of what they do is pulling your hair.
00:08:25.000 Which people?
00:08:25.000 So you send them Now you're looking at it.
00:08:28.000 So you show up.
00:08:29.000 Wow, Katz is not anywhere near the top CA.
00:08:38.000 What the hell is Cat Bull 2?
00:08:39.000 Catfish, the TV show.
00:08:42.000 Cabal, the cat and the moon.
00:08:45.000 I've never heard of any of these.
00:08:48.000 Imagine liking the musical cats.
00:08:50.000 And by the way, I would not put that past you.
00:08:52.000 I don't.
00:08:54.000 Oh, I'm in reverse here.
00:08:55.000 Cat.
00:08:58.000 You don't like the musical cats?
00:09:00.000 I hate musicals as much as gay porn.
00:09:02.000 You know, Anthony saw it.
00:09:04.000 I was listening to Opie and Anthony earlier, and he knows a lot about the Cats musical.
00:09:09.000 Yeah.
00:09:11.000 He's all into singing, right?
00:09:13.000 He's all into.
00:09:14.000 No, it's not a singing thing.
00:09:15.000 It's like a date thing.
00:09:16.000 Like, he brought his chick to the Russian tea cafe or whatever, and then you take her to Cats.
00:09:20.000 That's kind of like the longest.
00:09:21.000 I met his chick.
00:09:22.000 She's cool.
00:09:22.000 She shouldn't.
00:09:23.000 No, it was way long ago.
00:09:24.000 Way in the 80s or whatever, in the 90s.
00:09:27.000 I went to see, I've told this story a million times, but I went to see my friend Bruce LaBruce is a porn director in Canada, a gay porn director.
00:09:36.000 And he...
00:09:41.000 Holy shit.
00:09:42.000 What the fuck?
00:09:44.000 You have to buy it for $20?
00:09:45.000 I have to buy it for $20.
00:09:47.000 Holy college.
00:09:48.000 This is going on the company card.
00:09:52.000 Buy HD for $19.99, or you can get it SD for $19.99.
00:09:56.000 It's up to you.
00:09:58.000 I like when they say, do you want to watch it later?
00:10:01.000 Imagine how obese the woman would have to be to love this movie.
00:10:05.000 I think you can only like this movie if you're over 60 pounds overweight.
00:10:11.000 You have to be above 200.
00:10:12.000 Their only fan is in the movie.
00:10:14.000 It's that fat Australian.
00:10:17.000 Yeah, that Australian chick to her.
00:10:19.000 Oh, I forget.
00:10:19.000 What is her name?
00:10:20.000 But they see her as like a skinny bitch.
00:10:24.000 So anyway, he has this movie.
00:10:29.000 We've got to show you our logos before we start the movie.
00:10:31.000 This was done by Universal.
00:10:33.000 Logos.
00:10:34.000 So if you're interested in working with us, this is the kind of movies we make.
00:10:39.000 This is the same as that shit that Maddie had to go through.
00:10:44.000 The anger management shit.
00:10:46.000 Like, you know why I'm showing you all my logos?
00:10:48.000 Because I can.
00:10:49.000 Yeah, fuck you.
00:10:50.000 You know why I abuse ex-cons and make them go through all these stupid courses for $50 a class?
00:10:56.000 Because I can.
00:10:57.000 I'm just a shitty person.
00:11:00.000 Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts, absolutely.
00:11:02.000 But anyway, at this gay porn, I should probably turn the volume on at some point.
00:11:07.000 I'm watching it, and it was actually pretty normal.
00:11:09.000 Like, it was about revolutionaries, Patter Meinhoff gang or something.
00:11:14.000 And I'm watching it going, okay, this is an okay movie, but I know gay sex is coming.
00:11:20.000 Oh, it was more so a theme that.
00:11:22.000 It's a movie movie with it, just has gay sex.
00:11:26.000 I already hate this shit.
00:11:27.000 That's sneaky.
00:11:29.000 And I'm watching it, and then I'm like, okay, this is okay.
00:11:33.000 And then you could tell the sex was coming.
00:11:35.000 Like, well, let's see what, you know, you seem like a big tough man.
00:11:39.000 Are you a big tough guy?
00:11:40.000 And you're like, no, he's not a tough guy.
00:11:41.000 He's fine.
00:11:42.000 Just move on.
00:11:42.000 He's fine.
00:11:43.000 No, you seem like you could really handle yourself.
00:11:45.000 And you're like, nah, he's good.
00:11:47.000 Why don't you talk to her?
00:11:48.000 Go talk to her.
00:11:49.000 And then he would look down at the guy's crotch and he'd be like, what else you got in there?
00:11:53.000 And you're like, alrighty, here we go.
00:11:56.000 And then they start sucking dicks and fucking up the butt.
00:12:00.000 And you're just like, alrighty, okay, let's wrap it up, boys.
00:12:04.000 Let's wrap it up.
00:12:06.000 And that would last, you know, like four minutes.
00:12:08.000 And then it'll get back to the movie.
00:12:09.000 You'd be like, oh, Jesus Christ.
00:12:10.000 Okay, let's see how long we can last to the next one.
00:12:13.000 And then inevitably, like 11 minutes later, it's like, well, look what the cat dragged in.
00:12:17.000 And you're like, oh, fucking shit, fucking shit.
00:12:19.000 And I have the same emotions with a musical where they come out and they're on strike.
00:12:27.000 And the boss is like, you can't go on strike.
00:12:30.000 What are you crazy?
00:12:31.000 Get back to those sewing machines.
00:12:32.000 And she goes, I ain't going back to no sewing machine.
00:12:36.000 And you're like, no, no, no, you just.
00:12:41.000 I ain't going to sew in this place.
00:12:44.000 No more.
00:12:46.000 Oh, fuck.
00:12:47.000 And then he's all there.
00:12:48.000 The boss is all mad.
00:12:50.000 You, that's too crazy.
00:12:51.000 You go back home.
00:12:52.000 You clean that up.
00:12:54.000 And all of you want five.
00:12:55.000 They're fine.
00:12:58.000 I'm going crazy.
00:13:00.000 And then it stops and gets snazzy.
00:13:03.000 I ain't leaving.
00:13:04.000 we're about to subject ourselves to fucking possibly two hours of that exact scenario.
00:13:10.000 You know what's funny too?
00:13:12.000 I took Bruce LaBruce to Resident Evil, and I got my revenge because he's gay, so he's very sensitive.
00:13:19.000 And Resident Evil, this particular one, I can't remember what number it was, but they had bred these dogs to be zombie killer.
00:13:26.000 No, they were making a disease, just like coronavirus, to make you into a super killer.
00:13:30.000 That was the first one.
00:13:31.000 Oh, really?
00:13:32.000 In like a super basement, like underground high-rise.
00:13:35.000 There's like this tube.
00:13:36.000 Yeah.
00:13:37.000 This blue tube with this spiral thing.
00:13:40.000 And it comes out, and then even the dogs get it.
00:13:43.000 The zombie dogs come ripping out of the cages.
00:13:45.000 And we were in the East Village, so there's some Puerto Rican there.
00:13:48.000 No, some.
00:13:48.000 It was 78% Puerto Ricans.
00:13:52.000 And when the dogs rip out of the cages, some guy goes, who let the dogs out?
00:13:59.000 That's what I was thinking before with the gay porn movie.
00:14:01.000 I want to see that in a room full of black people and drunks.
00:14:04.000 Because you know when they talk in horror, like, where you going out there?
00:14:07.000 What the hell are you doing for?
00:14:08.000 Stop sucking that dick.
00:14:09.000 That's gay.
00:14:10.000 What are you doing?
00:14:11.000 You're going to get AIDS.
00:14:12.000 He's asking you what's in his pocket.
00:14:14.000 And when he puts the guy's cock in a hot dog bun, he's like, who let the dogs out?
00:14:19.000 All right, let's see how much we can handle.
00:14:21.000 I already know I'm going to hate Idris Elba the most.
00:14:24.000 It's probably because I just read that he, what did he say?
00:14:29.000 Oh, yeah.
00:14:30.000 Coronavirus is a result of our abuse of Mother Earth.
00:14:33.000 Whoa.
00:14:34.000 So he's saying climate supports the gay.
00:14:37.000 The gays deserved AIDS theory.
00:14:39.000 Yeah, I guess that's what he's saying.
00:14:41.000 Wow, eight.
00:14:42.000 All right, so we're in a world where cats are humans.
00:14:45.000 Cats are cats.
00:14:46.000 Is that it?
00:14:46.000 Do they have pet cats?
00:14:47.000 Do they have pet humans?
00:14:49.000 That's a good question.
00:14:50.000 I actually don't know.
00:14:52.000 Cats are cats in this film?
00:14:54.000 I believe so.
00:14:55.000 Like, that's not a cat driving.
00:14:56.000 Oh, that's a human.
00:14:57.000 Yeah.
00:14:59.000 So, cats are just anthropomorphized?
00:15:03.000 Mm-hmm.
00:15:04.000 But they're still cats.
00:15:08.000 What's with this music?
00:15:09.000 Is this Frank Zappa?
00:15:11.000 It really does sound like Frank Zappa.
00:15:14.000 Is that a bag of humans?
00:15:15.000 Or are those non-anthropo...
00:15:17.000 My...
00:15:23.000 Yeah, the Gary's mailbag viewer.
00:15:29.000 Is this supposed to be bad?
00:15:31.000 So I threw a bag of losers on the ground.
00:15:34.000 They are animals.
00:15:36.000 Is it better for you audio-wise if I turn this down?
00:15:39.000 And by the way, is this manual focus before I stab you?
00:15:46.000 That is manual focused.
00:15:48.000 I could even...
00:15:56.000 Yep.
00:15:58.000 Anthrop comorphies.
00:16:02.000 That's in focus.
00:16:03.000 We're good.
00:16:09.000 Didn't she blow everyone either way?
00:16:12.000 Is that Taylor Swift?
00:16:14.000 I think the main chick is Taylor Swift.
00:16:15.000 What was that sound?
00:16:16.000 Oh, Taylor Swift doesn't strike me as a blower.
00:16:18.000 No.
00:16:19.000 That's Taylor Swift?
00:16:21.000 I think so.
00:16:22.000 Whose the fuck is that?
00:16:25.000 Oh, we're going right into songs?
00:16:29.000 A porn doesn't even do this.
00:16:30.000 The ears.
00:16:36.000 The Tails Dance?
00:16:38.000 The reason I didn't want to do this, by the way, is because everyone else is doing it.
00:16:43.000 Seth Rogan did it.
00:16:47.000 Roberts did it.
00:16:47.000 Sam Roberts.
00:16:49.000 But you had to buy it along.
00:16:50.000 We've been planning this before that.
00:16:52.000 But you had to buy it at home and then watch it along with it, which is a good idea.
00:16:56.000 It's like Making Funny Cats is like low-hanging fruit.
00:17:00.000 It was voted the worst movie of all time.
00:17:02.000 Wow.
00:17:04.000 Aren't you getting kind of a phallic thing when the men have tails?
00:17:10.000 It's very penile.
00:17:11.000 Like, he just grabbed his tail and sort of pointed it at them.
00:17:13.000 Really?
00:17:14.000 You want to suck my tail?
00:17:18.000 Oh yeah, it just went...
00:17:24.000 By the way, all musicals are gays on Coke.
00:17:28.000 Because it's a gay guy sitting at a piano with like an eight ball, and he has to do an entire album in like, I don't know, a month.
00:17:38.000 Isn't a crunch at all?
00:17:39.000 Yeah, like when, you know, Pink Floyd or The Stones did their first album, it was a compilation of their first five years of hard work.
00:17:47.000 Right.
00:17:48.000 But they say to some gay, hey, hit your piano and write us about a bunch of, and all the songs have to be about cats.
00:17:53.000 And they're like, okay.
00:17:56.000 Hey, look out, boy.
00:17:57.000 It's a rock and roll scary fantasy.
00:18:00.000 Woo!
00:18:01.000 I can totally see that.
00:18:02.000 Alan Mencken, he does all the Disney songs.
00:18:05.000 Fucking proud boys.
00:18:06.000 Proud of your boy.
00:18:07.000 The reason we love that song so much is because it's such an obvious, half-assed, gay thing.
00:18:07.000 Right.
00:18:12.000 And that's the guy who did it.
00:18:13.000 Alan Mencken.
00:18:14.000 Really?
00:18:17.000 What are they talking about?
00:18:18.000 Am I supposed to listen to the lyrics of these fucking things?
00:18:21.000 Yeah, does that set up the story?
00:18:22.000 Does that move the plot along?
00:18:23.000 Oh, yeah.
00:18:24.000 This sucks.
00:18:24.000 A sheet.
00:18:25.000 That's Taylor Swift arrived in like a pillowcase?
00:18:27.000 I think so.
00:18:29.000 I think that's Taylor Swift.
00:18:30.000 So they're like, hi, Taylor Swift.
00:18:33.000 Welcome to, what are they, in Paris?
00:18:36.000 Is that London?
00:18:37.000 Is that Piccadilly Circus?
00:18:38.000 I saw a man die there, dude.
00:18:39.000 Oh, Piccadilly Square?
00:18:41.000 Yeah, I saw a guy die there.
00:18:44.000 Bleeding to death?
00:18:46.000 No.
00:18:46.000 He was eating a sandwich.
00:18:49.000 Old Italian guy.
00:18:50.000 I was 18, 1988.
00:18:52.000 I was in Piccadilly Circus in London.
00:18:54.000 And he started choking.
00:18:57.000 An old Italian dude.
00:19:01.000 And they didn't speak any English.
00:19:04.000 And everyone's freaking out.
00:19:06.000 They're still mourning the death of punk.
00:19:09.000 And look at that little face.
00:19:14.000 What'd you think of that?
00:19:17.000 Oh, I knew I'd hate him the most.
00:19:20.000 Okay, this is my new pet peeve.
00:19:24.000 Colored contacts.
00:19:26.000 Johnny Depp with fucking Whitey Bulger ruined the movie with his gorgeous blue swimming pool eyes.
00:19:33.000 And then fucking Robert De Niro with his crazy blue eyes.
00:19:36.000 His dead man zombie eyes.
00:19:38.000 His dead man zombie blue eyes, robot eyes, in whatchamacall?
00:19:44.000 Irishman.
00:19:45.000 The Irishman.
00:19:46.000 And now I knew Idris Elba would be my least favorite character because of his dumb fucking contacts.
00:19:50.000 Yeah, that's the way you relate to a person, their eyes.
00:19:54.000 And when they're fucking.
00:19:55.000 I'm just so distracted.
00:19:56.000 Like, that's why a wandering eye is such a curse.
00:19:59.000 I find it attractive on hot chicks, but.
00:20:01.000 Like Jacob Engels?
00:20:02.000 Like Jacob Engels turns me on.
00:20:06.000 But Jacob, if you're watching this, and if that other eye doesn't work, why the fuck don't you have an eye patch?
00:20:13.000 Every man on earth wants a facial scar, a strong chin, a black mustache, and an eye patch.
00:20:19.000 I don't put one on because I have two functioning eyes.
00:20:22.000 But that's Den Cranch.
00:20:23.000 You poked me with a fucking shish kebab stick in the eye right now.
00:20:27.000 I'd go, oh, fuck, fuck you, Ryan, you're dead.
00:20:30.000 But I also think, I'm actually going to have a fucking iPad.
00:20:33.000 You break your arm really.
00:20:34.000 Can't wait for people to sign this cat.
00:20:35.000 That's going to be kind of cool.
00:20:37.000 Like Tommy Robinson's buddy in the UK, who has a massive machete scar from fighting Muslims.
00:20:43.000 And when he was in the hospital getting stitched up, this Indian girl, a nurse, said, you're going to be popular after they see that night.
00:20:51.000 Wow.
00:20:53.000 That's crazy.
00:20:54.000 That's why, like Egypt Elba, he's all scarred up and shit.
00:20:56.000 Oh, really?
00:20:57.000 He looks mangy and shitty.
00:20:59.000 From what?
00:21:00.000 Just being apped out of the ass over a pile of broken glass.
00:21:06.000 With a pile of glass.
00:21:07.000 Yeah.
00:21:08.000 So wait, let's see where the buttholes would be.
00:21:10.000 We'd see buttholes all up in this right there.
00:21:12.000 Especially that shot.
00:21:13.000 Well, that's Seth Rogen's joke.
00:21:16.000 You just stole.
00:21:18.000 Oh, what?
00:21:20.000 That you would see buttholes everywhere?
00:21:23.000 Okay, so now that you're astray, she was a domestic cat, I guess.
00:21:27.000 And they've released her into the streets of London?
00:21:31.000 Another song?
00:21:36.000 One did just end.
00:21:37.000 Is this entire movie going to be a fucking song?
00:21:40.000 I'm not going to make it if that is.
00:21:42.000 Let's turn it up a little bit.
00:21:44.000 I've got the volume right here.
00:21:48.000 I hate Idris Elba.
00:21:50.000 Come on!
00:21:51.000 Right, he's the...
00:21:55.000 He's like the Burt Reynolds of our generation.
00:21:57.000 I was already kind of annoyed by him, but today when he said that this is all a result of global warming, I was just like, you're fucking dead to me.
00:22:05.000 Was he on thin ice before that?
00:22:07.000 Yes!
00:22:08.000 Exactly.
00:22:12.000 Why would you say that?
00:22:14.000 If you're a cat.
00:22:15.000 They're all like this the whole movie.
00:22:17.000 Everyone is all woo-y.
00:22:18.000 Zooy.
00:22:20.000 That's how cats act.
00:22:22.000 Do they, though?
00:22:25.000 They're more apathetic.
00:22:26.000 I think the CGI of this movie and the other one is just one of your holiday games.
00:22:31.000 This whole movie is endless songs.
00:22:33.000 It's endless songs.
00:22:36.000 China is an asshole, and this movie is endless songs.
00:22:42.000 That's Taylor Swift?
00:22:43.000 Mm-hmm.
00:22:43.000 So her job in this movie is just to be perpetually going...
00:22:48.000 But it's...
00:22:48.000 James.
00:22:49.000 James.
00:22:53.000 So what happens after a movie like this comes out?
00:22:56.000 After Shrek the Musical came out, all these high schools, like the lead drama teacher lady, she's like, we can pull this off.
00:23:02.000 And you will see high schoolers embarrass themselves for life trying to recreate these musicals.
00:23:09.000 And I can't wait to see when some local shitty Ohio school tries it.
00:23:16.000 I can't listen to these lyrics.
00:23:17.000 I'm sorry.
00:23:19.000 But is this whole movie just you should be careful?
00:23:22.000 You're here in the streets now.
00:23:25.000 And Idris Elba is like the leader of the bad guys.
00:23:28.000 Well, I think right now they're explaining the whole thing is about these nine lives and stuff.
00:23:33.000 Wait, why do you know this?
00:23:34.000 I've heard.
00:23:36.000 I'm from here.
00:23:37.000 I'm not secretly.
00:23:39.000 Yo, come here.
00:23:40.000 What's up?
00:23:40.000 What?
00:23:42.000 Did I tell you the plot to cats yet?
00:23:45.000 You know what's up with cats?
00:23:47.000 Like UFO talk?
00:23:48.000 Yo, did you hear that YouTube video?
00:23:48.000 Yeah.
00:23:52.000 This shit with cats is fucked and bugged out, right?
00:23:55.000 There was a dude on Joe Rogan talking about how the cats...
00:24:02.000 That's what I refer to him from now on.
00:24:05.000 No, that's me.
00:24:06.000 I'm one of those Joe Rogan niggas.
00:24:07.000 Oh, that's right.
00:24:09.000 That's right.
00:24:11.000 You should hand that little pin to people.
00:24:13.000 When you've done Joe Rogan more than once, you get a little pin that says Joe Rogan nigga.
00:24:16.000 Here you go, man.
00:24:17.000 That's a great job, man.
00:24:18.000 That's crazy, man.
00:24:20.000 Wait a minute.
00:24:21.000 This movie is 100% songs.
00:24:25.000 What makes you think there's a song?
00:24:26.000 The fact that there's a clarinet creeping through the air?
00:24:30.000 How about she goes, anyway, so now that I'm here, where's food and water?
00:24:35.000 Where do I sleep?
00:24:36.000 I don't want to get raped.
00:24:39.000 You know, girl stuff.
00:24:43.000 Is there a scratching post?
00:24:46.000 Who can I buy nip from?
00:24:48.000 Who's this actor?
00:24:49.000 Is he famous too?
00:24:50.000 It's hard to tell when they look like the three guys from Earth Girls are easy.
00:24:54.000 I don't even know what those guys look like, but that made me laugh.
00:25:00.000 Oh, please, Crash.
00:25:02.000 Please.
00:25:04.000 Crash.
00:25:06.000 Earth Girls Are Easy.
00:25:07.000 Hey, looters, can you come to my house?
00:25:09.000 And before you attack my family and try to take our food, can you clip my cable, please?
00:25:15.000 When you're clipping the phone lines, make sure you don't forget the cable.
00:25:18.000 It's another motherfucking song.
00:25:23.000 It's with the Jeff Goldblum, Jim Cable.
00:25:23.000 Earth Girls Are Easy.
00:25:25.000 Yeah, I know it.
00:25:26.000 I know it.
00:25:27.000 Don't have the monsters memorized.
00:25:29.000 They look like this, but blue, green, and orange.
00:25:32.000 Blue, red, and orange.
00:25:35.000 Where did I know that guy?
00:25:36.000 Is that Dr. Seuss?
00:25:37.000 Who is he?
00:25:38.000 It's the cat in the hat.
00:25:41.000 Once again, at the Jellicle Bowl, where we all rejoice.
00:25:47.000 Oh my god.
00:25:49.000 Is that Hugh Grant?
00:25:51.000 No, no, no, no.
00:25:55.000 You have to admit, the CGI technology is pretty impressive.
00:25:58.000 It is until He's really locked onto that costume.
00:26:02.000 The fat Australian.
00:26:04.000 I saw a clip of Sam watching this.
00:26:06.000 And the necklace, I think they had to add the collars in post.
00:26:11.000 And so you'll see the trackings off-like dramatically off.
00:26:15.000 Sometimes.
00:26:16.000 Look at it.
00:26:17.000 Look at the collar.
00:26:19.000 Yeah, but why wouldn't you just put them in cat costumes?
00:26:23.000 Like the music.
00:26:24.000 What's the bugged me about Will fucking Smith's I Am Legend?
00:26:30.000 The zombies ruin it.
00:26:31.000 Yeah, they do.
00:26:32.000 I can find you skinny people.
00:26:34.000 Everyone knows at least one dude who's so skinny he's a freak.
00:26:37.000 Yeah, or have real dudes in...
00:26:42.000 You know, there's that one dude in your gang in high school who was a freak?
00:26:45.000 Get all a bunch of those together.
00:26:47.000 They don't need any lines.
00:26:48.000 You know what's funny about that movie?
00:26:49.000 I watched it the other day.
00:26:52.000 And that zombie that he practices on, like he finds the cure for.
00:26:56.000 Did we talk about this already?
00:26:57.000 I've seen it.
00:26:58.000 I don't remember.
00:26:59.000 Okay, she has your perfect tits.
00:27:01.000 So she's like, and like has no teeth and her eyes are spouting blood.
00:27:08.000 And the obviously CGI guys don't get laid.
00:27:12.000 So when they're doing tits, they're just like perfect fucking little bocce balls with rotund nipples.
00:27:21.000 Shitty teeth, shitty ears.
00:27:22.000 Yeah.
00:27:22.000 Eyes rolling in the back of her head.
00:27:24.000 I fuck zombies.
00:27:25.000 They have sagging dugs.
00:27:29.000 This movie is 100% songs.
00:27:32.000 This is Fatty McAusie.
00:27:34.000 Apparently she was molested.
00:27:37.000 That was quite the aside.
00:27:39.000 In real life of this movie.
00:27:40.000 No, I know people that know her.
00:27:42.000 And apparently, like, they'd order lunch and she'd order two large pizzas and eat them to herself.
00:27:49.000 Oh, my God.
00:27:50.000 And then she'd just go, or I like food.
00:27:53.000 And I don't like my skateboard.
00:27:54.000 It's the same with facial tattoos.
00:27:56.000 If you're severely obese, you're trying to say to the world, I'm not attractive.
00:28:00.000 And if you're trying to say to the world, I'm not attractive.
00:28:02.000 Look at the necklace.
00:28:04.000 Oh, yeah, that is.
00:28:04.000 Look at the collar.
00:28:05.000 Did you see that?
00:28:06.000 This is what the part where they were mentioning.
00:28:06.000 Yeah.
00:28:08.000 Look at that collar.
00:28:11.000 The track.
00:28:12.000 It's like, yet again, two movies that we've watched back-to-back that I did the After Effects for.
00:28:17.000 I like how your talents are an insult.
00:28:20.000 Look at the crack in her face.
00:28:22.000 Yep.
00:28:23.000 Meanwhile, she never fucks anyone.
00:28:25.000 She's asexual.
00:28:27.000 I thought she had a guy.
00:28:28.000 Oh, no, that's Adele.
00:28:29.000 Adele had a guy.
00:28:30.000 Yeah, no, she's got no one in her life.
00:28:32.000 Adele's with a guy who looks like is with her.
00:28:38.000 What the hell?
00:28:40.000 What the fuck is going on?
00:28:41.000 Are those mice?
00:28:42.000 Yeah, those are mice.
00:28:44.000 So this is just, by the way, it's a very benevolent community where you show up and everyone can't wait to introduce you to the different subgroups.
00:28:52.000 Cats are not that social.
00:28:52.000 Right.
00:28:53.000 Like, if you fell out of a taxi in Paris, Pew would be like, hey, the north of Paris has the Muslims, so watch your ass so you get stabbed.
00:29:05.000 Pigal is the strippers and fucking Montmartre is all the hipsters.
00:29:10.000 Watch where you go.
00:29:12.000 Watch where you go.
00:29:14.000 Let me take you to Montmartre.
00:29:15.000 And then furthermore, they're like, don't talk to him.
00:29:17.000 He's the local.
00:29:18.000 And then he leans in.
00:29:20.000 He's like, I think you should come to Pigal and we can see the Go-Go girls kick their legs.
00:29:27.000 And they're like, don't talk to him.
00:29:30.000 And I'm all shocked and in awe.
00:29:35.000 This is the whole fucking movie.
00:29:38.000 Here's what's going on in this particular scene.
00:29:40.000 This could be a short-term.
00:29:41.000 I don't think we're going to make it, my friend.
00:29:42.000 I think...
00:29:46.000 They're capitalizing, catpotalizing on cringe.
00:29:51.000 That's a terrible movie.
00:29:52.000 I think this is intentional.
00:29:56.000 Because remember the trailer again.
00:29:58.000 Remember all the trailer?
00:29:59.000 Like, literally every little split second was like terrible on purpose for $300 million.
00:30:04.000 Was it produced by Tim and Eric?
00:30:05.000 Ew, this is making me gay.
00:30:08.000 I never want to fuck a woman again.
00:30:11.000 Again, with the penis stuff.
00:30:13.000 That's her song.
00:30:14.000 There's a little, you know, microphone.
00:30:17.000 Did she do this in a blue suit with dots all over it?
00:30:20.000 I don't know.
00:30:22.000 I hope not.
00:30:26.000 Yeah, really?
00:30:27.000 Why didn't they do this with Souton?
00:30:28.000 You know why they didn't do it with Souton?
00:30:30.000 Because then they had to make huge furniture in huge sets.
00:30:35.000 So?
00:30:36.000 Make huge furniture in huge sets.
00:30:38.000 Be wearing a cat suit with a green screen behind you.
00:30:40.000 They were roaches.
00:30:41.000 They're roaches?
00:30:42.000 Yeah.
00:30:44.000 Oh, I never wanted to fuck a roach before.
00:30:47.000 I still don't.
00:30:50.000 What?
00:30:51.000 What the flip?
00:30:53.000 Come on.
00:30:55.000 Imagine how hot it would be.
00:30:58.000 I mean, literally, if you were a cat and you were wearing a fur suit on top of your actual fur?
00:31:06.000 Do cats eat roaches?
00:31:07.000 I don't even know.
00:31:08.000 I guess.
00:31:10.000 Apparently she eats everything.
00:31:15.000 No, but that fat Australian actress does.
00:31:19.000 By the way, is this fucking fancy house in the Lower East Side, what's with all the roaches?
00:31:27.000 Well, they're upper echelon roaches that dance.
00:31:30.000 Yeah, they're billionaire Puerto Ricans.
00:31:34.000 Raid, no just put some sugar in a tall cup overnight.
00:31:43.000 Please, dialogue.
00:31:46.000 Who's that?
00:31:50.000 I think that's Jason Derulo.
00:31:51.000 That's really good.
00:31:52.000 It's all a bit old school.
00:31:54.000 Get out.
00:31:55.000 We're just trying to offer you some feedback.
00:31:59.000 Finally, dialogue.
00:32:01.000 I just thought I'd have a feet at the back.
00:32:03.000 Get out of this kitchen now!
00:32:05.000 Let's dance!
00:32:06.000 Jason Derulo.
00:32:08.000 It really is song after song after song after song.
00:32:12.000 How much time has elapsed?
00:32:14.000 Wait a minute.
00:32:14.000 He's mad at her for doing such an old fashioned song and he's got a 70s funk song to show her how to update life.
00:32:28.000 Is there an audiobation?
00:32:29.000 No, I want to see how long we've been recording.
00:32:31.000 So this is 31 minutes so far.
00:32:35.000 We're not going to make it.
00:32:35.000 I don't.
00:32:38.000 There's nothing.
00:32:39.000 The reason we're doing these shows is to offer some sort of like satirical insight.
00:32:46.000 But this is the same scene.
00:32:49.000 The whole fucking movie.
00:32:51.000 You know what it really is?
00:32:52.000 This is crazy.
00:32:54.000 It's women.
00:32:55.000 It's a woman's fantasy.
00:32:57.000 And the woman's fantasy is, I don't know why women are British in this.
00:33:03.000 Right, and I'm taken care of.
00:33:04.000 I go somewhere somewhat dangerous, and then all these different groups want me.
00:33:10.000 And they tell me all about them, and they warn me, and they're trying to seduce me.
00:33:14.000 Everyone wants me.
00:33:15.000 And they're dancing around and trying to entertain me and coming a little too close, but then jumping back.
00:33:20.000 And I just get indulged with all this fucking attention.
00:33:24.000 It's like in school, you know.
00:33:26.000 It's like I'd be friends with the goths, you know?
00:33:29.000 and friends with the nerds.
00:33:30.000 Yeah, I wanna go to a school where I'm, Yeah, that kind of happens in school, right?
00:33:33.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:33:37.000 What's her name?
00:33:38.000 I didn't see Mean Girls.
00:33:39.000 Lindsay Lohan is from South Africa.
00:33:42.000 Really?
00:33:43.000 Yeah.
00:33:43.000 She comes from South Africa.
00:33:44.000 She's an African-American, yeah.
00:33:45.000 Oh.
00:33:46.000 I never seen her.
00:33:47.000 Well, she was stationed there, I think, because she doesn't have a South African accent.
00:33:50.000 Okay, sir, appearance or stage.
00:33:51.000 And then they...
00:33:58.000 That was a joke.
00:34:00.000 And then the girl and the gay guy introduce her to everyone to school.
00:34:06.000 But Mean Girls is funny and has a plot.
00:34:08.000 Sure.
00:34:08.000 This is just the beginning of Mean Girls on a loop.
00:34:13.000 This is a furries wet.
00:34:15.000 This cost me $20.
00:34:17.000 What do you think furries think about this?
00:34:19.000 There's probably articles about it.
00:34:20.000 I wonder if they're snobs.
00:34:22.000 Yeah.
00:34:22.000 I don't know if you like that.
00:34:24.000 Yeah.
00:34:25.000 Inauthentic.
00:34:26.000 I mean, the shapes of the bodies are whatever, but you're supposed to have more animal aspects, not just a human with a body.
00:34:32.000 Their tails shouldn't have been poised so high.
00:34:36.000 What is that, her toes?
00:34:38.000 Yeah, do they have toes or is it just like a furry covering?
00:34:47.000 Yeah, they're doing Sly in the Family Stone after saying the previous song was too old-fashioned.
00:34:52.000 This movie was a disaster.
00:34:56.000 Like them just trying to make it alone.
00:34:57.000 The horror stories.
00:34:59.000 The only way you could enjoy this movie is if you were a gay with a fat best friend girl.
00:35:05.000 And you're bat fag hag.
00:35:06.000 Instead of bloodshed.
00:35:07.000 Fat hag.
00:35:08.000 Fat hag.
00:35:09.000 A fag hag and a fat hag.
00:35:10.000 And a cat hag.
00:35:11.000 Are the only people who could enjoy this movie?
00:35:13.000 A cat hag, a fat hag.
00:35:14.000 Look at this shit.
00:35:15.000 I've never seen a musical.
00:35:17.000 I hate musicals, but I've never seen one that was just one long song.
00:35:20.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:35:20.000 Like, Rocky Ord Picture Show had a plot.
00:35:23.000 Right.
00:35:23.000 Jersey boys.
00:35:25.000 I'm not familiar with Jersey Boys, but okay.
00:35:29.000 Alright.
00:35:30.000 Buddy Holly or whatever?
00:35:31.000 Or no, um...
00:35:36.000 I would rather kiss Gary on the lips.
00:35:37.000 Oh, we're really tapping out.
00:35:39.000 Yep.
00:35:42.000 I'm not exaggerating.
00:35:43.000 I would rather let Gary give me a facial massage with his fucking pterodactyl claws.
00:35:49.000 I would not want that.
00:35:51.000 Correct.
00:35:52.000 But at least it's over.
00:35:54.000 Yeah.
00:35:57.000 Oh, God.
00:36:01.000 Well, this is a good movie to just kind of talk over.
00:36:04.000 Oh, wait.
00:36:05.000 Listen to Ryan.
00:36:06.000 He's kind of sad.
00:36:09.000 Actually, I love hating it.
00:36:10.000 Let's go.
00:36:11.000 And the thing is, with this audio...
00:36:13.000 Yeah, we've...
00:36:16.000 There's two hours on the card.
00:36:17.000 Well, I can scrap the card, but then.
00:36:20.000 Yeah.
00:36:21.000 No, no.
00:36:22.000 Like, let's keep making fun of how gay it is.
00:36:24.000 I hate it.
00:36:27.000 It's so stupid.
00:36:28.000 Can I log into your account after this?
00:36:30.000 Oh, my God.
00:36:34.000 Let's watch it again.
00:36:36.000 Let's watch it twice and really get a good laugh.
00:36:38.000 I knew we were going to be watching it.
00:36:40.000 By the way, look how high up the hunt was.
00:36:46.000 I was at the ha and it was third.
00:36:51.000 That's pretty.
00:36:52.000 Pretty pretty.
00:36:53.000 For a movie that wasn't supposed to be released.
00:36:56.000 All right, so you're worried we're going to run out of cards?
00:36:58.000 Just for this microphone here, but it sounds nice.
00:37:00.000 I mean, it's getting a nice room for you.
00:37:02.000 But can't we do a jump cut and empty that card and then put it back in?
00:37:05.000 Yeah.
00:37:08.000 Yeah, I'm not watching that.
00:37:13.000 Bye, bitch.
00:37:14.000 Yeah, I'm not watching that.
00:37:16.000 Okay, the hunt.
00:37:22.000 I have a bad feeling that this movie is saved by a female badass who roundhouse kicks everyone.
00:37:33.000 Again, Universal.
00:37:36.000 Just in case you were curious about the production company, the distributor of this film.
00:37:42.000 So I know that's the first thing you ask when the movie comes up.
00:37:45.000 Who's distributing it?
00:37:46.000 Who produced it?
00:37:48.000 What movies, what companies are behind it?
00:37:51.000 Also, of course.
00:37:52.000 Blumhouse.
00:37:53.000 The infamous...
00:37:55.000 Perry Plunder.
00:37:57.000 No, it's Blumhouse.
00:37:58.000 It is.
00:38:00.000 What are they called?
00:38:01.000 Blumhouse.
00:38:02.000 Blumhouse.
00:38:07.000 I'm such a pussy that I've watched Scary Movies Alone and Blumhouse was the production company.
00:38:13.000 And that intro scared me.
00:38:14.000 Universal Pictures.
00:38:16.000 So they show you the logo and then they show you the it in text.
00:38:20.000 In case you don't read graphics.
00:38:22.000 Hopefully this will smooth out.
00:38:24.000 Uh-oh.
00:38:25.000 Oh, this is a cruel, cruel trick.
00:38:28.000 Wow.
00:38:32.000 This is how you know whether it's irrevocable.
00:38:35.000 1, 1,000, 2, 1,000, 3, 1,000, 4, 1,000, 5, 1,000, 6, 1,000, 7, 1,000, 8.
00:38:42.000 1, 1,000, 2, 1,000, 3, 1,000, 4, 1,000, 5, 1,000, 6, 1,000.
00:38:49.000 1,000, 2,000, 3,000, 4,000, 5,000, 6,000, 7,000, 8,000.
00:38:55.000 Oh.
00:38:56.000 I think we're good.
00:39:01.000 and Remember that one time during Colors Out of Space was only when we were talking shit about the movie?
00:39:09.000 We could say nice things about the movie, and as soon as we started talking shit, it would go, fuck you, and it would skip.
00:39:16.000 Dude, that's huge.
00:39:18.000 What?
00:39:18.000 I can't read a damn thing.
00:39:21.000 So they're showing a funny turtle meme, and then they say, speaking of which, anyone see what our rat fucker in chief just did?
00:39:29.000 And they're billionaires.
00:39:30.000 They're calling each other billionaires.
00:39:31.000 Deplorables.
00:39:32.000 Deplorables.
00:39:33.000 And then they said, I'm glad the hunt is coming up.
00:39:38.000 Huh.
00:39:39.000 So Deplorables got mad, like a bunch of pussies, and said, don't show this movie.
00:39:46.000 They shouldn't have done that.
00:39:49.000 Or was that some sort of fake?
00:39:51.000 No, like Breitbart and all these other right-wing things say there's a movie coming out that talks about hunting us.
00:39:56.000 Yeah, I'm not for that whole...
00:40:02.000 Yeah, but also we promised not to talk about the manor on text.
00:40:08.000 The manor.
00:40:09.000 Imagine being so pretentious.
00:40:10.000 You name the era you live in The Manor.
00:40:12.000 the manor Yeah, by the way, don't talk about the people you fly into a different country to murder on text.
00:40:29.000 Not even Telegram.
00:40:30.000 Sir?
00:40:30.000 Can you get a snack?
00:40:34.000 Uh, what?
00:40:35.000 Sir, I didn't mean to just want to see you again.
00:40:38.000 I'm going to have to reboot this fucking cable box.
00:40:45.000 Another jump cut is coming.
00:40:47.000 I'll give it three more jump breaks and then we're rebooting it.
00:40:53.000 Is that one?
00:40:54.000 That's one.
00:40:58.000 too.
00:40:58.000 It's okay.
00:41:04.000 He's a political hack that has been working very hard with the mainstream media.
00:41:10.000 And although he's got great sources, I find him to be quite an asshole, frankly.
00:41:18.000 Donald Trump, as we know, has done some things.
00:41:23.000 Yeah, that's really good.
00:41:25.000 I'm letting you riff like in jazz musician.
00:41:27.000 I'm Roger Stone.
00:41:27.000 I'm standing back.
00:41:28.000 I'm Roger Stunn.
00:41:31.000 I'm Roger.
00:41:32.000 That was pretty good.
00:41:35.000 Sir, I didn't mean to interrupt.
00:41:36.000 I just wanted to see if you could get a snap.
00:41:39.000 I'm just kidding.
00:41:41.000 Oh.
00:41:42.000 Yeah.
00:41:43.000 We have some fantastic caviar.
00:41:43.000 What's up?
00:41:45.000 It's Ecetra, fresh fruit.
00:41:46.000 Have you ever had caviar?
00:41:48.000 No, sir.
00:41:49.000 It's delicious.
00:41:50.000 It is, yeah.
00:41:51.000 No, it's not.
00:41:52.000 Is it not?
00:41:53.000 No, it's gross.
00:41:54.000 Like salty.
00:41:56.000 It's like fish cum thing with some figs or even like a small fish.
00:42:04.000 I'm sorry, sir.
00:42:05.000 We don't even have a kitchen.
00:42:06.000 Full kitchen here.
00:42:08.000 Oh, fuck.
00:42:10.000 How about a glass of champagne?
00:42:12.000 Boom.
00:42:12.000 Great.
00:42:13.000 Perfect.
00:42:14.000 Wait a minute.
00:42:15.000 This is tough for us to watch because once again, white males are the bad guys.
00:42:20.000 Rich white males are the bad guys.
00:42:24.000 They're using the rich white males we actually do hate.
00:42:27.000 Yeah, this is the snub liberals.
00:42:30.000 But he's informed.
00:42:36.000 No one even knows what the stuff tastes like.
00:42:39.000 It's just plain old champagne.
00:42:44.000 That's basically Milo.
00:42:48.000 Yeah, it really is.
00:42:49.000 He's very particular about stuff.
00:42:54.000 Oh, Jesus.
00:42:55.000 What the hell are you doing?
00:42:55.000 Jesus.
00:42:57.000 What the hell are you doing?
00:42:58.000 Oh, fuck.
00:43:02.000 Shit.
00:43:02.000 Shit.
00:43:04.000 What is happening?
00:43:06.000 Oh, God.
00:43:07.000 Okay.
00:43:10.000 Okay.
00:43:12.000 Everything's fine.
00:43:12.000 Calm down.
00:43:13.000 Everything's fine.
00:43:15.000 It's alright.
00:43:17.000 Get some towels.
00:43:18.000 Okay.
00:43:18.000 Yeah, get towels.
00:43:19.000 It's okay.
00:43:20.000 It's alright.
00:43:21.000 It's alright.
00:43:21.000 No, no, no.
00:43:22.000 It's okay, man.
00:43:22.000 I'm a doctor.
00:43:24.000 Oh, great.
00:43:25.000 Fantastic.
00:43:26.000 If you could just lay those towels on the floor right there.
00:43:30.000 What's his name?
00:43:31.000 Is that a squealer, I think?
00:43:34.000 Randy.
00:43:35.000 Randy.
00:43:36.000 Oh, that's great.
00:43:37.000 Now, I just need you.
00:43:38.000 We're just going to go down to the floor.
00:43:40.000 Just deal down.
00:43:40.000 There you go.
00:43:41.000 Do you know what's going on?
00:43:42.000 Because I kind of do.
00:43:43.000 I just need you to lie down.
00:43:44.000 Yeah, I know exactly what's going on.
00:43:45.000 How can you not know what's going on?
00:43:47.000 Those are the sedated subjects, and he kind of woke up.
00:43:51.000 Nice.
00:43:51.000 Because he's too big to keep the dose.
00:43:54.000 So they have sedated rednecks in the back.
00:43:57.000 Because you woke up before you were supposed to.
00:43:59.000 Yep.
00:44:00.000 Yeah.
00:44:01.000 And those are the bougie hunters.
00:44:04.000 Thank you, Ryan.
00:44:06.000 You did know that.
00:44:07.000 Damn it.
00:44:08.000 By the way, that seems like a waste of a valuable asset.
00:44:12.000 Yeah.
00:44:13.000 Just trank him again.
00:44:14.000 Just trank him again.
00:44:15.000 or hit him in the head with a thing So wait, rich snobby guy is actually a liberal douche guy.
00:44:30.000 Yeah.
00:44:32.000 Rich people are bad in this movie, but they're right.
00:44:41.000 Hey.
00:44:44.000 Ah.
00:44:45.000 Oh, she.
00:44:46.000 Put him in the back with the rest.
00:44:47.000 This isn't right.
00:44:48.000 He doesn't even know.
00:44:49.000 It hasn't even started yet.
00:44:51.000 God.
00:44:55.000 I knew it.
00:44:58.000 Comrade.
00:44:59.000 War is war.
00:45:01.000 You know how women are, right?
00:45:03.000 When there's a major.
00:45:06.000 He's, I guess, less scary than a spider in a bathtub.
00:45:10.000 Right.
00:45:11.000 So, you know, when someone attacks a woman, what they tend to do is take off their high-heeled shoe in their PJs and calmly impale him in the eye until it goes to his breast.
00:45:21.000 And then remove it.
00:45:22.000 And I don't think they showed it, but I'm sure she went like this and just sucked the blood off the tip of the stiletto.
00:45:27.000 She put it up her cunt.
00:45:31.000 For later, guys, you're not good at this.
00:45:41.000 Ouch.
00:45:45.000 Wait, is he alive?
00:45:46.000 Yes.
00:45:48.000 He just got Dan Crenshaw, is all.
00:45:50.000 He's just an eye, short.
00:45:56.000 What does this guy have in common with the word toad?
00:46:01.000 They're both missing an eye.
00:46:01.000 What?
00:46:03.000 That is so...
00:46:06.000 I love that one.
00:46:09.000 Why didn't they re-trank him?
00:46:11.000 I assume it costs, what, like...
00:46:15.000 No. 30 cents.
00:46:16.000 If you buy in bulk.
00:46:16.000 What?
00:46:18.000 What are you talking about?
00:46:19.000 Tranks.
00:46:20.000 Oh, right.
00:46:21.000 No, I'm not talking about tranks.
00:46:22.000 I assume it costs like...
00:46:29.000 $50,000.
00:46:29.000 $15,000.
00:46:30.000 to tranquilize...
00:46:38.000 Get away with it.
00:46:39.000 You got to pay, like, whoever low-flying planes that don't have whatever the not FDA, but you know them.
00:46:39.000 Get away with it.
00:46:47.000 Right, right, right.
00:46:48.000 You got to get through all that.
00:46:49.000 So it's obviously comfortably $100,000, but maybe if you were a super expert, you can get it down to $50,000.
00:46:55.000 If you buy bulk.
00:46:56.000 So that's a $50,000.
00:46:57.000 That's like a brand new Range Rover that's decked out.
00:46:59.000 And one less...
00:47:00.000 Just went...
00:47:03.000 Why isn't there security on the plane?
00:47:05.000 That guy should be charged for that.
00:47:07.000 That should come out of his fucking fucked up.
00:47:09.000 Yeah, someone needs to be fired.
00:47:11.000 Yeah.
00:47:12.000 That guy can't play with everybody else.
00:47:14.000 You already killed one, so you're not going to be able to do it.
00:47:15.000 The reason I'm so particular about this is because I want to do the same thing, but for liberals.
00:47:21.000 And when I do it, it's going to be much better.
00:47:23.000 And cheaper.
00:47:23.000 The private plane, it'll be like Shank Uger and Andy Campbell and all these Antifa journalists.
00:47:30.000 Bill Summers.
00:47:31.000 Yeah, they'll all be there.
00:47:32.000 And we will kill you, Matthias.
00:47:34.000 On the plane.
00:47:35.000 We will not kill you on the plane.
00:47:36.000 Guarantee.
00:47:37.000 Guarantee all fucking teed.
00:47:40.000 We will sedate you.
00:47:41.000 And if you wake up, we'll sedate you again.
00:47:43.000 Like they do with fucking elephants when they're transporting them.
00:47:47.000 Hey, where are you going?
00:47:51.000 I would be like, hey, I know I'm jumping ahead here, but I'd love to fuck you.
00:47:55.000 And I'd love that to be in while we do it.
00:47:57.000 And my heels on.
00:47:59.000 Can you put on high-heel shoes and then we'll try to survive later?
00:48:05.000 Let me fuck you with my heels on.
00:48:07.000 See what happens when you pronounce it correctly?
00:48:11.000 You got stabbed with a woman with one of her heels on, yeah.
00:48:15.000 I wanted to stab you with my heels.
00:48:18.000 Period.
00:48:19.000 Period.
00:48:19.000 I saw Gigi Gorgeous's Instagram today, and she was talking about Oh.
00:48:30.000 Just in case you're curious, men can't menstruate.
00:48:33.000 She's a woman nerd.
00:48:36.000 She's like a superhero nerd, but I keep looking at Nat Getty and Gigi Gorgeous's Instagram, and they're just like, Nat Getty, I kind of understand.
00:48:44.000 She's a mentally ill lesbian, and it's just obviously very confused.
00:48:48.000 Oh, Gigi, that's Gigi's husband?
00:48:51.000 Yeah, husband.
00:48:52.000 But Gigi fucking...
00:48:59.000 Nat.
00:49:00.000 Nat Getty of Getty Oil.
00:49:02.000 Nat Getty is Gigi's husband as much as Nat Getty is my husband.
00:49:08.000 You're gonna Nat Getty your period, I'll tell you that.
00:49:14.000 Look at her run.
00:49:15.000 Wow, that was cool.
00:49:17.000 That's funny because these people are mentally deplorables, but they're rich actors and they end up having rich people mannerisms.
00:49:25.000 Poor rednecks don't run like...
00:49:29.000 Nat Getty, your beard.
00:49:33.000 I feel like I could get that off.
00:49:33.000 Wow.
00:49:36.000 It's just leather.
00:49:38.000 I guess it's like, you need some pretty.
00:49:41.000 Well, you could help each other get that shit off, right?
00:49:44.000 Can I chew it off?
00:49:45.000 How'd you get it off?
00:49:48.000 Oh, there's like the Hunger Games, but.
00:49:50.000 Yes, it is the Hunger Games.
00:49:52.000 With blue collar people.
00:49:53.000 Blue collar Hunger Games.
00:49:54.000 That's all it is.
00:49:56.000 Great pitch.
00:49:57.000 By the way, Republicans, conservatives, let's not ever talk about banning art ever, okay?
00:50:04.000 That includes Piss Christ, the dung elephant.
00:50:08.000 Dung Mary.
00:50:09.000 Dung Mary, whatever.
00:50:10.000 We don't ban art.
00:50:11.000 That's what they do.
00:50:13.000 We are free speech.
00:50:16.000 And we enjoy it.
00:50:17.000 I like Pissed Christ.
00:50:18.000 In fact, I would argue the artist who made Pissed Christ was actually He is Catholic, you know.
00:50:24.000 He was talking about the way Christ is being...
00:50:31.000 Gotcha.
00:50:32.000 He's not just crucified anymore.
00:50:34.000 He's drenched in piss.
00:50:35.000 Gotcha.
00:50:36.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:37.000 He still exists, but he's obscured by piss.
00:50:41.000 Because everybody is obscured.
00:50:42.000 I think America First guys should enjoy the show Hunters.
00:50:51.000 This is the butthole cut of this movie.
00:50:54.000 As we just saw.
00:50:56.000 I hate that I can't fart on the mic anymore.
00:50:58.000 This is the worst part about the coronavirus.
00:51:00.000 You just did.
00:51:01.000 No, the worst part.
00:51:02.000 Well, you couldn't hear.
00:51:03.000 I guess I could.
00:51:04.000 The worst part was Yeah, it was HD.
00:51:06.000 It's like same level as your ass.
00:51:09.000 It's like HD, same level of your ass.
00:51:12.000 Not match to subscribe.
00:51:14.000 It's like people are like.
00:51:21.000 You should do.
00:51:22.000 That came from your ass boy.
00:51:23.000 Oh my God, you have to do this.
00:51:23.000 You know what you should do?
00:51:25.000 You do a parody of one of those Asian sneaker pimps, and you have sneakers right in front of you and stuff.
00:51:30.000 But you're actually reviewing various farts that have happened on camera.
00:51:34.000 It's like, this is Wendy Williams.
00:51:36.000 She shoots hot fire from her lover.
00:51:39.000 This is badass.
00:51:40.000 This one was like totally off the chain.
00:51:42.000 Like, literally, there was no chain where she purped.
00:51:46.000 This is like, you could tell that some shit came out.
00:51:49.000 This was basically a shot.
00:51:50.000 She's badass.
00:51:51.000 This is called, this is first father days.
00:51:53.000 I call it morning trumpet.
00:51:55.000 This is, this, you could tell it was so hot that it burned her anal lips.
00:51:59.000 The first roll cleared out.
00:52:01.000 Oh, my fucking son came up with a funny bit today.
00:52:06.000 Instead of being like, hey, man, let me throw something by you here.
00:52:09.000 Tell me what you think.
00:52:10.000 You say, hey, man, let me wipe something on you.
00:52:14.000 So You're like, hey, man.
00:52:15.000 Is that your youngest son?
00:52:16.000 No, the eldest.
00:52:18.000 Oh, really?
00:52:18.000 Hey, man, let me wipe something on you.
00:52:21.000 What about this?
00:52:23.000 In boxing, when there's a knockout, you just stop the fight.
00:52:26.000 I don't care if he gets up.
00:52:28.000 I don't care if he's down for one second.
00:52:29.000 Just the second there's a knockout.
00:52:31.000 Let me wipe something on you real quick.
00:52:33.000 And then just move past it immediately.
00:52:34.000 That's genius.
00:52:35.000 Hold on, let me wipe something on you.
00:52:37.000 What about school was outdoors?
00:52:39.000 Yeah.
00:52:42.000 I guarantee if you said it to people, they'd be like, oh, that's the thing probably.
00:52:46.000 I'll just move on.
00:52:47.000 I'm the idiot.
00:52:48.000 Oh, shh.
00:52:48.000 Yeah, I'm the dummy.
00:52:51.000 Was that baby blue?
00:52:53.000 That was the blonde.
00:52:54.000 The blue chick.
00:52:57.000 Shit just got real.
00:52:59.000 Jesus Christ.
00:53:01.000 Who just died?
00:53:02.000 The blue chick.
00:53:04.000 The one who's running like that?
00:53:05.000 Yeah, the blonde blue.
00:53:07.000 Now, in a movie, is that good?
00:53:10.000 As an actor?
00:53:11.000 Do you want to die early?
00:53:13.000 No.
00:53:15.000 You get paid less.
00:53:17.000 Are you sure?
00:53:19.000 I mean, you're in the movie, you've worked less.
00:53:21.000 I know, that's logical, but I'm not sure it's true.
00:53:23.000 I'm not, yeah.
00:53:24.000 You're dead.
00:53:31.000 That's why black people get paid less in movies because they die first.
00:53:35.000 Just right off the bat.
00:53:36.000 At least in horror movies.
00:53:38.000 They absolutely do.
00:53:43.000 I'm so proud of myself for not making a racist joke.
00:53:46.000 You were dead silent.
00:53:48.000 I had like nine racist jokes going through my head.
00:53:48.000 Yeah.
00:53:51.000 I'm like, I was like, George Bush, not gonna do it.
00:53:54.000 It's my birthday tomorrow.
00:53:56.000 It's your birthday tomorrow?
00:53:59.000 How about a whole body?
00:54:01.000 Come on, happy birthday on three, okay?
00:54:03.000 One, two, happy birthday!
00:54:06.000 No, that's not how it works with spikes through chats, dudes.
00:54:09.000 Oh, fuck.
00:54:12.000 Press fine.
00:54:14.000 Yeah, you'll bleed out.
00:54:15.000 You only have no bones.
00:54:18.000 I mean, it's conceivable that there's nothing important there.
00:54:21.000 Maybe.
00:54:22.000 Oh, shit.
00:54:24.000 Are these hunter people even having any fun?
00:54:27.000 I know.
00:54:27.000 These hunter people have blown their nut.
00:54:30.000 It's sort of like you go to a buffet and you just eat all the bread first.
00:54:36.000 Right.
00:54:37.000 You're going to be okay.
00:54:40.000 Happy birthday.
00:54:42.000 Come on, go with the fucking snowflake.
00:54:48.000 See, this is why I don't think art should be banned.
00:54:50.000 She called him a snowflake.
00:54:52.000 Yeah.
00:54:53.000 And that was funny and cool.
00:54:55.000 And that was our side.
00:54:56.000 Right.
00:54:58.000 This is can't be.
00:54:59.000 This movie.
00:55:00.000 I like this.
00:55:01.000 I know, folks at home, I'm sorry that we took away your cats, but I'm having a great time.
00:55:09.000 Our shows are usually an hour, just over an hour.
00:55:12.000 These shows are like two hours.
00:55:14.000 And we're not talking about coronavirus.
00:55:14.000 Yeah.
00:55:16.000 We're not telling you to wash your hands all the time.
00:55:18.000 It's amazing how many celebrities on Twitter are saying, wash your hands, get under your fingernails.
00:55:29.000 You told me to wash my socks in the dryer on yesterday's show.
00:55:33.000 Play with us too?
00:55:34.000 And I regret it.
00:55:35.000 Without even wearing them.
00:55:37.000 Them being dirty.
00:55:39.000 I threatened to take it.
00:55:40.000 By the way, you know what's funny?
00:55:41.000 That mad TV dude with the beard is one of the most annoying Twitter liberals really.
00:55:46.000 Yeah, he's brutal, dude.
00:55:48.000 That sucks.
00:55:49.000 He will not shut up.
00:55:50.000 I've always liked him.
00:55:51.000 I never liked his face, but I've always liked his work.
00:55:55.000 That sucks.
00:55:57.000 And he's not good.
00:55:58.000 He's not a good actor, but he's like.
00:56:00.000 I enjoy him.
00:56:01.000 A chronic masturbator Mark Wahlberg.
00:56:06.000 Yeah, he does look like a Downsy Wahlberg.
00:56:07.000 He looks like...
00:56:11.000 Did that just go right through him?
00:56:14.000 This movie just began.
00:56:15.000 Fucking crazy.
00:56:16.000 Keep climbing, I'm gonna help you.
00:56:17.000 Come on.
00:56:18.000 No, keep climbing.
00:56:19.000 Keep climbing, come in the river.
00:56:20.000 Up, up, go up.
00:56:22.000 What is this avatar shit?
00:56:24.000 How far does the fence go into the ground?
00:56:27.000 Gotta go.
00:56:28.000 Can you go under the fence?
00:56:32.000 That must hurt like a motherfucker.
00:56:35.000 Imagine.
00:56:36.000 Yes.
00:56:36.000 Like, you know how much a splinter hurts?
00:56:39.000 Imagine how much an arrow hurts.
00:56:39.000 Yeah.
00:56:43.000 And it stops your although you're from moving a little bit.
00:56:46.000 Oh, that's got a smart.
00:56:47.000 Yeah.
00:56:48.000 You're deed.
00:56:50.000 As they say in Glasgow, you're deed.
00:56:53.000 You're dead le.
00:56:55.000 What?
00:56:56.000 They say le after everything?
00:56:58.000 That's Quebec.
00:57:00.000 Okay.
00:57:01.000 You're deed.
00:57:02.000 3,000 miles off.
00:57:05.000 He's fucking toast.
00:57:11.000 Way to go, rich people.
00:57:12.000 You're down to three humans.
00:57:14.000 Did you plan this for like half of a month?
00:57:16.000 because then that's worth it.
00:57:20.000 A lot.
00:57:20.000 So it's $50,000 per person.
00:57:23.000 And you do this.
00:57:24.000 Probably $100,000.
00:57:25.000 They had one, two, three, probably six, seven people, right?
00:57:29.000 Yeah.
00:57:33.000 Let's hope there's a plane full of more.
00:57:35.000 There's about $200 in the cash register.
00:57:37.000 So let's just say it's a victim per client, right?
00:57:43.000 Roughly.
00:57:44.000 This has to be a million dollars.
00:57:47.000 Yeah.
00:57:48.000 We don't want to take the money.
00:57:50.000 One victim per million.
00:57:51.000 Is that even further than a trip?
00:57:55.000 How much is it to go to space?
00:57:57.000 I don't know.
00:58:00.000 Probably millions of dollars.
00:58:02.000 Yeah.
00:58:04.000 Jesus.
00:58:05.000 Fucking Arkansas.
00:58:07.000 It's Mother, Arkansas.
00:58:10.000 I love it, though.
00:58:12.000 You have grandchildren?
00:58:13.000 Can I see a picture of them?
00:58:14.000 I'm just kidding.
00:58:15.000 I can fucking hit them.
00:58:16.000 Son, whatever's going on here?
00:58:18.000 What's going on is we're getting goddamn hunted.
00:58:20.000 But y'all have guns.
00:58:21.000 Yeah, to defend ourselves.
00:58:24.000 Hello?
00:58:25.000 911, whichever.
00:58:27.000 There's a bit of killing spree.
00:58:27.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:58:28.000 You gotta come here right now.
00:58:29.000 Can you repeat that, sir?
00:58:31.000 There's been a murder spree in the woods at fucking Massacre.
00:58:33.000 It's Manergate.
00:58:35.000 I'm sorry, sir.
00:58:36.000 I'm having trouble understanding.
00:58:38.000 Just fucking Google it.
00:58:38.000 Manergate.
00:58:40.000 I can't Google it right now.
00:58:42.000 Listen to me, okay?
00:58:43.000 We woke up with these gadgets.
00:58:45.000 Again, if you are setting up a fake 911, then you the dispatcher should say, we'll be right there, sir.
00:58:53.000 Thank you very much.
00:58:54.000 We're on it!
00:58:55.000 And then be like, sorry.
00:58:59.000 Unless he wants to break their spirit.
00:59:02.000 Fuck.
00:59:04.000 Alright, listen to me.
00:59:05.000 I just missed a detail.
00:59:32.000 What did it say, dude?
00:59:35.000 You said that's a great idea.
00:59:39.000 Did you know when you write a script, there's certain pages you're supposed to have a thing on?
00:59:44.000 You don't want me to go off by the way.
00:59:45.000 Like, it's a minute per page, right?
00:59:49.000 So 120-minute movie is 120 pages.
00:59:52.000 And on page 11, 11 minutes in, you're supposed to have conflict.
00:59:59.000 Or like a doohickey.
01:00:02.000 Like a song.
01:00:02.000 Right.
01:00:03.000 Like a verse, chorus, verse.
01:00:04.000 Yes.
01:00:05.000 I don't know what we're at right now.
01:00:06.000 Probably 21 minutes in.
01:00:08.000 And on page 21, you're supposed to have a clue.
01:00:12.000 Like, these guys are being hunted.
01:00:14.000 Gotcha.
01:00:14.000 Gotcha.
01:00:15.000 How are you?
01:00:18.000 This is it.
01:00:19.000 Oh, the donuts are poisoned.
01:00:30.000 So it's down to two people?
01:00:32.000 Wait a minute.
01:00:32.000 I'm not paying a million dollars to have some bitch eat a rotten donut.
01:00:36.000 Right.
01:00:38.000 Yeah, what did they pay to get here?
01:00:41.000 They work here.
01:00:42.000 Did they even take a plane?
01:00:44.000 They just get to have all the fun?
01:00:45.000 They're part of it too.
01:00:46.000 Yes.
01:00:47.000 Yes.
01:00:47.000 Hey, I want to pay a million dollars to fly to...
01:00:55.000 Spoiler alert.
01:00:56.000 I'm going to pay a million dollars to fly to Schloopenklappen and pretend to own a bodega and give someone a poison donut.
01:01:07.000 I got an idea.
01:01:08.000 Why don't you do that in Wisconsin?
01:01:11.000 Right.
01:01:13.000 For eight bucks.
01:01:14.000 And they so eloquently posted, I'm a godless elite for the record asshole.
01:01:22.000 Climate change is real.
01:01:25.000 Wow.
01:01:28.000 This is our movie.
01:01:30.000 This is our movie.
01:01:36.000 Right.
01:01:37.000 Oh, wait a minute.
01:01:38.000 Wait a minute.
01:01:38.000 Wait a minute.
01:01:40.000 These store owners do this all day.
01:01:44.000 Oh.
01:01:46.000 They're getting more than their money's worth.
01:01:49.000 Huh.
01:01:50.000 They don't just do one poison donut.
01:01:52.000 They've killed like 500 people.
01:01:56.000 They're there for the year.
01:01:57.000 That's their summer holiday.
01:01:58.000 Huh.
01:02:02.000 Sorry.
01:02:04.000 Wait, should you say this?
01:02:06.000 I hate liberal elites who believe in climate change or think climate change is a major threat.
01:02:13.000 I don't think they want to literally murder all of us.
01:02:16.000 Right.
01:02:17.000 I mean, wait a minute.
01:02:19.000 That's actually a good question.
01:02:21.000 Do they?
01:02:22.000 Like, how literal is their hatred?
01:02:24.000 I don't think they actually would, but they sure would like to.
01:02:28.000 Like, a lot of the people in my neighborhood who hate me for being Trump, if I handed them a gun and said, you won't go to jail and put it up against my head, would they actually pull the trigger?
01:02:37.000 You know, it's very...
01:02:39.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:02:40.000 Here's what's crazy.
01:02:40.000 But you know what?
01:02:42.000 If you could vote for Donald Trump, African Americans privilege, Julius.
01:03:10.000 It's perfectly fine to call them black again.
01:03:13.000 Wow.
01:03:13.000 According to who?
01:03:15.000 NPR.
01:03:16.000 Which consists almost exclusively of...
01:03:19.000 Niggers.
01:03:21.000 The fucking worst.
01:03:25.000 I'm coming.
01:03:29.000 You there?
01:03:30.000 Hey, we're here.
01:03:32.000 We got three of them.
01:03:34.000 Yeah, they're a million dollars each.
01:03:38.000 We blew three million of your money.
01:03:46.000 I feel like this movie would be more plausible if the people were like total derelict hillbilly losers.
01:03:52.000 Like, I don't fuck my third.
01:03:56.000 I'm from the Looney Bin.
01:03:59.000 Like, even getting people from the Looney Bin would be a major challenge.
01:04:05.000 There are 43 grams of sugar in that bottle.
01:04:08.000 Oh, God, Miranda.
01:04:09.000 You're really scared.
01:04:10.000 That's pretty funny.
01:04:12.000 That is a good joke.
01:04:13.000 This is funny.
01:04:16.000 If you were to do this with bums, right?
01:04:20.000 It would still be cost-prohibitive.
01:04:24.000 Because you have to fly them and there's only a lot of people.
01:04:27.000 Imagine getting a bomb out of New York.
01:04:29.000 Shoot them with a tranquilizer dart.
01:04:30.000 There's cameras everywhere.
01:04:32.000 Roll them into a van.
01:04:34.000 What the fuck?
01:04:36.000 There was a body rolled into a van.
01:04:38.000 There's a fine line there.
01:04:39.000 And then what airport are you using?
01:04:42.000 What plane is going to what, Costa Rica?
01:04:46.000 They're in Europe, by the way.
01:04:47.000 They're in Schloofenflatz.
01:04:49.000 Oh.
01:04:49.000 I love Schloofenflatz this time of year.
01:04:54.000 Also.
01:04:55.000 This was in the trailer.
01:04:56.000 Yes.
01:04:57.000 But if there was a vote to execute Donald Trump, do you think it would be 100% of the Hillary votes?
01:05:05.000 It would be maybe thirty percent of all Democratic votes?
01:05:11.000 I would say a hundred million people how many people vote total?
01:05:16.000 Three hundred twenty one million?
01:05:17.000 Probably less.
01:05:18.000 Probably two hundred and eighty million vote.
01:05:26.000 Sixty million vote, that's it.
01:05:29.000 So maybe it'd be sorry, that was a crazy talk.
01:05:32.000 I'm drinking.
01:05:33.000 I'm going to say 30 million people would ask you to put a billion draws out.
01:05:38.000 I mean, they'd 100 million would say it.
01:05:42.000 30 million would want you to literally do it.
01:05:44.000 that's crazy oh no i didn't most people know where they are the jungle oh you're in the glorious stadium
01:05:44.000 Right.
01:06:09.000 Oh, she looks at the cigarettes?
01:06:20.000 Devoid of politics?
01:06:22.000 Cigarettes in Arkansas only cost six bucks.
01:06:24.000 You fucked up.
01:06:28.000 That's pretty great.
01:06:31.000 That's pretty great.
01:06:34.000 By the way, if you devote your summers to killing people, the odds are pretty high you're gonna get killed.
01:06:40.000 Right.
01:06:41.000 Sorry.
01:06:42.000 Oh, they're empty too?
01:06:47.000 Okay, this is what bumps me out about these kind of movies.
01:06:51.000 The fucking my ex-girlfriend is saving the world.
01:06:56.000 This is New Jersey Spawn.
01:06:58.000 Like, I've dated girls like this.
01:07:01.000 They don't shoot fucking old men in the head.
01:07:06.000 Why couldn't that be like a Navy SEAL?
01:07:09.000 Terry Shappard.
01:07:09.000 I love that.
01:07:10.000 Why couldn't that be Terry Shappard?
01:07:12.000 Yeah.
01:07:13.000 Terry Shepard could easily do this.
01:07:17.000 Why does American Society do Terry Shappard heroes?
01:07:22.000 And they don't.
01:07:23.000 But Hollywood does.
01:07:25.000 Terry Shappard is Mark Wahlberg in The Sniper.
01:07:31.000 The Sniper made more money than all other movies that year combined.
01:07:35.000 American Sniper?
01:07:36.000 American Sniper.
01:07:37.000 That wasn't obviously Mark Wahlberg, but Mark Wahlberg also had a sniper movie.
01:07:42.000 Uh-oh, I'm getting drunk.
01:07:43.000 American Sniper was Brad Cooper.
01:07:47.000 Bradley Cooper.
01:07:49.000 Bradley Cooper, yeah.
01:07:51.000 This is in the trailer.
01:07:56.000 Yeah, wouldn't they get extra?
01:07:58.000 Why would you leave the European license plate on?
01:08:01.000 Is it more work to...
01:08:11.000 You want her make her bust the rusty button.
01:08:13.000 I don't want to fuck with no schloopin' flapping license plates.
01:08:17.000 So I'll leave that there and then I'll put my new crazy license plate, my fake license plate from Arkansas on.
01:08:24.000 With a diamond-plated bumper with the amount of rust that is contingent on.
01:08:29.000 I'll spent doing trump loi, as they say in France, on the paint to make it look exactly like the old paint.
01:08:37.000 Trump L'Oil?
01:08:38.000 Yeah.
01:08:39.000 It's like trick of the eye.
01:08:42.000 By the way, I got to be honest with you, dude.
01:08:45.000 Yesterday, when we saw that rabbit, I was lying.
01:08:51.000 What do you mean?
01:08:52.000 French for rabbit is la pain.
01:08:55.000 It's not babibin.
01:09:01.000 I've been teaching you wrong French words.
01:09:03.000 This entire time.
01:09:04.000 This entire time.
01:09:05.000 You've been learning it from bulking.
01:09:09.000 So when I said it's like, a babibo.
01:09:12.000 And I said, people often abbreviate it.
01:09:15.000 Some people say just babi, baby.
01:09:16.000 Babi.
01:09:17.000 And I was like, that sounds right.
01:09:18.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:09:19.000 And in my mind, I was like, rabbit, babi.
01:09:21.000 Yeah.
01:09:21.000 Yeah.
01:09:22.000 Babi, rabbit.
01:09:22.000 Rabbit is la pang.
01:09:24.000 Fuck off.
01:09:25.000 And you don't even know if I'm going to be able to do that.
01:09:26.000 I'm not even believing I'd be lying again.
01:09:28.000 This is poison dose.
01:09:31.000 La Lou.
01:09:33.000 If you don't mind.
01:09:35.000 What happened?
01:09:36.000 No, lalu.
01:09:37.000 A wolf is male.
01:09:39.000 I'll just stick to duolingo from now on.
01:09:43.000 I didn't lie to you.
01:09:44.000 But let me guess, by the way, speaking of the black girl in Charlie's Angels yesterday, I'm guessing this woman has no depth whatsoever and is like just a robot.
01:09:55.000 I think she has one moment where she cries and shows emotion.
01:09:58.000 Have you seen this movie before?
01:09:59.000 No.
01:10:01.000 That sounded sarcastic, but really no.
01:10:06.000 That'd be funny if you're jumping on a bear trap because you're with PETA and you're like, I hate fucking bear traps.
01:10:16.000 They hurt bears.
01:10:20.000 Holy shit.
01:10:22.000 And mousetraps, too.
01:10:23.000 Mousetraps are bullshit.
01:10:26.000 I'd like to give mousetraps the finger.
01:10:28.000 Fuck you, mousetrap.
01:10:31.000 But I love cheese.
01:10:33.000 Takes it.
01:10:34.000 Is this the guy who lost Mad Wait from Boy Meats World?
01:10:37.000 He was the big fat bully.
01:10:39.000 And now he's ripped?
01:10:40.000 Yeah.
01:10:42.000 Is this the guy in the Will Forte show, Man, Last Man Standing, whatever?
01:10:48.000 He is.
01:10:49.000 Probably, but he was in American History X. The fat guy from American History X?
01:10:54.000 I wanted to see the coming up.
01:10:54.000 Oh, yeah.
01:10:56.000 Did he turn into like a not fat guy?
01:11:00.000 Now he's muscular.
01:11:01.000 Like Copper Cab.
01:11:02.000 I hate when people being hunted are apathetic.
01:11:06.000 Like, how long have you been hunted for?
01:11:08.000 Your whole fucking life?
01:11:09.000 You can hunt humans with no fucking.
01:11:10.000 Yeah, I'm just following tracks.
01:11:12.000 Now I'm going to go along the railroad.
01:11:16.000 That's how some people work.
01:11:17.000 If you're being hunted, you've been, by the way, sedated and flowing to schloop and flats.
01:11:22.000 Yeah.
01:11:23.000 So when you see someone else, you go, can you believe this shit?
01:11:27.000 The fuck?
01:11:29.000 Okay.
01:11:30.000 Okay.
01:11:31.000 Adrenaline control.
01:11:32.000 Adrenaline control.
01:11:32.000 Thank God I'm a proud boy and I got beaten.
01:11:34.000 You would have a lot of questions.
01:11:36.000 Alright, so here's the deal: we gotta stay calm, stay calm, stay rational.
01:11:41.000 How'd they get you on moving?
01:11:43.000 Shelter.
01:11:44.000 Second, one of us gets hit with an arrow, the other one runs.
01:11:49.000 You look like you're feeling better than I am.
01:11:51.000 What did you do to combat the sedative?
01:11:54.000 Tell me about the people at the botega, the corner store you killed.
01:11:59.000 Where are you going now?
01:12:01.000 So there is a second group.
01:12:02.000 He's from some other group.
01:12:04.000 Right?
01:12:04.000 And so is she.
01:12:06.000 Is she gonna take a shit?
01:12:07.000 I don't know.
01:12:08.000 I am.
01:12:09.000 I'm Gary.
01:12:11.000 By the way, Gary is a guy talk for I don't like hearing girls shit.
01:12:19.000 Hence our own Gary.
01:12:21.000 Oh, she uses her vagina lips to feel if a train's coming.
01:12:26.000 My pussy's incredibly sensitive.
01:12:28.000 Oh.
01:12:33.000 I know you're not super horny.
01:12:34.000 I know you just shit.
01:12:35.000 I know you just took a shit.
01:12:41.000 That'd be funny if they jump on the train and then you see them well healed on the train just like fucking what's her name on the helicopter yesterday and then the credits just roll.
01:12:58.000 Girls all around the world gonna make it.
01:13:00.000 You can tell.
01:13:03.000 Bye Fatty.
01:13:05.000 Bye bye.
01:13:06.000 It's gonna make it.
01:13:09.000 I think she decided to just bring him up.
01:13:12.000 You saw that in her weird look.
01:13:15.000 That was a weird kind of anti-male thing.
01:13:18.000 Yeah, she's like, I could have brought him up.
01:13:20.000 Should I keep going with these men in the society?
01:13:23.000 Should I continue the patriarchy?
01:13:26.000 Ah.
01:13:27.000 Like with Charlie's Angels the other day, where they made fucking Charlie a chick.
01:13:32.000 Yeah.
01:13:33.000 That was haunting.
01:13:34.000 Boswell has been bad forever.
01:13:36.000 Right.
01:13:37.000 Yeah.
01:13:38.000 Boswell was only bad after he retired.
01:13:38.000 No, no.
01:13:42.000 Who's that?
01:13:46.000 He was capable of corrupt human beings.
01:13:48.000 But the fact that they say the words in woman and then it gets translated.
01:13:55.000 What the fuck's going on now?
01:13:58.000 This is the immigrant section of this social dialogue?
01:14:02.000 They're not real.
01:14:03.000 Uh-uh.
01:14:04.000 No, we have you.
01:14:05.000 Crisis actors.
01:14:06.000 What a chance is the one train car with the open doors full of illegals.
01:14:12.000 I mean, you look at these fuckers.
01:14:14.000 Shoot them out on the head.
01:14:18.000 Are you fucks trying to teach us a lesson?
01:14:21.000 Oh, no.
01:14:22.000 I feel so sorry for immigrants and refugees.
01:14:26.000 I'm going to have to rethink my information.
01:14:28.000 Oh, this is not good.
01:14:30.000 Here's what I'm thinking.
01:14:32.000 This is a movie that distances themselves from leftists.
01:14:36.000 Super, super leftists.
01:14:38.000 But it's a leftist.
01:14:39.000 Wait, this movie is offensive to both right and left.
01:14:42.000 That's what I like about it.
01:14:43.000 I'm offended right now.
01:14:46.000 So you're doing a good job.
01:14:49.000 It's like making valid points.tv.
01:14:52.000 It's offensive to everyone.
01:14:54.000 Yeah.
01:14:55.000 They're making valid points look ignorant and stupid.
01:14:59.000 I don't like it.
01:15:03.000 He's essentially the same character from American History X. By the way, that would be a good bluff.
01:15:09.000 Pretend you're going to shoot them to see if they're actors.
01:15:12.000 And then go like this.
01:15:14.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:15:16.000 You pretend you're terrible at shooting a gun and go, and then just miss.
01:15:20.000 And see if they go, holy fuck.
01:15:22.000 What?
01:15:23.000 Toss it, motherfucking jail.
01:15:25.000 Come on, die there.
01:15:27.000 Yeah, if you hear Jesus Christ, get me out of there.
01:15:29.000 Jesus Christ.
01:15:38.000 Oh yeah, you're just another Syrian refugee, you blonde woman.
01:15:42.000 Wait, how did you know it took place in Europe?
01:15:45.000 Because of the license plate.
01:15:47.000 No, before that.
01:15:48.000 I saw it in the trailer.
01:15:50.000 Oh.
01:15:53.000 I like how you're dubious of me.
01:15:56.000 You've seen this.
01:15:57.000 You're paying $20 for this.
01:15:58.000 Wait a minute.
01:15:59.000 Am I part of this?
01:16:00.000 Are you hunting me?
01:16:03.000 No.
01:16:03.000 Yeah, I am.
01:16:13.000 No, no, no, no.
01:16:14.000 You're trusting too many people.
01:16:15.000 I have a podcast.
01:16:16.000 I've been exposing these people.
01:16:18.000 Uh-oh.
01:16:19.000 Imagine you're in this.
01:16:21.000 I bet a facsimile.
01:16:22.000 Actually, maybe I am.
01:16:26.000 He's about to die.
01:16:27.000 They're making fun of your balding and weight gain in one show.
01:16:32.000 It isn't.
01:16:33.000 Nothing?
01:16:34.000 What?
01:16:35.000 I wasn't listening.
01:16:37.000 I was so hoping my prediction would come true.
01:16:39.000 That's the depiction of you?
01:16:40.000 They're making fun of your weight gain and balding.
01:16:45.000 I'm Gavin McGonigal.
01:16:46.000 That'd be funny if that was my biggest...
01:16:50.000 I'm actually taking Rogane right now.
01:16:52.000 Ron.
01:16:53.000 And yeah, I have been boxing for a while because we've been quarantined.
01:17:00.000 We need to get fired.
01:17:02.000 Wait.
01:17:17.000 Wait, this is cool.
01:17:18.000 This just got super cool.
01:17:20.000 So wait, this is a crisis actor?
01:17:23.000 And then they were?
01:17:24.000 No, he's one of them.
01:17:26.000 And he's there from like two years ago.
01:17:30.000 Weird.
01:17:31.000 This is not a one-month thing.
01:17:33.000 This is.
01:17:34.000 Oh, shit.
01:17:36.000 That's not good.
01:17:38.000 Oh.
01:18:01.000 Oh, Jesus.
01:18:06.000 Okay, this movie just officially got cool.
01:18:10.000 So it's not a silly little month-long excursion.
01:18:14.000 It's a year's-long thing with real refugees, real soldiers.
01:18:23.000 They keep adding more people to this.
01:18:25.000 It's official.
01:18:26.000 We're in a cool zone.
01:18:28.000 aren't you glad we're not watching cats?
01:18:29.000 Yeah, that could have been...
01:18:36.000 Yeah, that would have sucked.
01:18:38.000 But Idra's Elbis character would develop.
01:18:41.000 Being blown by Eva Mendez would suck, but it would be awesome.
01:18:45.000 Is that her?
01:18:46.000 On that boat?
01:18:47.000 No, she's got meat on her bones.
01:18:48.000 Bones.
01:18:49.000 Meat on her bones.
01:18:51.000 And James Corden's character did look promising.
01:18:54.000 I wish I could have heard 900 other songs.
01:19:02.000 Yeah.
01:19:13.000 Arkansas.
01:19:15.000 I was eating in Mississippi when I got knocked out for what was it, late 18 hours.
01:19:30.000 By the way, don't trust authorities ever.
01:19:33.000 Don't talk to authority like this.
01:19:35.000 I'm a pro-cop guy, but don't talk to cops like this.
01:19:39.000 Just say, I don't know, I don't understand.
01:19:41.000 I don't understand.
01:19:42.000 No ID.
01:19:43.000 Please help.
01:19:44.000 Please help.
01:19:45.000 Croatia?
01:19:46.000 Do you have any problem?
01:19:47.000 Croatia, yeah.
01:19:48.000 How you get here?
01:19:49.000 No matter.
01:19:50.000 You need to call the American Embassy.
01:19:52.000 That's right.
01:19:53.000 That's a Russian accent.
01:19:54.000 I don't have papers.
01:19:56.000 Can you call the embassy?
01:19:59.000 You hunted?
01:20:01.000 Oh.
01:20:03.000 Ooh.
01:20:03.000 Who said I was kind of...
01:20:06.000 You hunted like dawn?
01:20:11.000 Who the fuck is dawn?
01:20:12.000 Yes, by the way, I am being hunted.
01:20:18.000 Before we get into it.
01:20:19.000 If you're familiar with the Hunger Game shit, then yeah, that's me.
01:20:23.000 Wait, you know about it?
01:20:24.000 We can talk about Don afterwards.
01:20:26.000 I am a hunted guy.
01:20:27.000 check.
01:20:35.000 Do you have one of those?
01:20:35.000 That's me.
01:20:35.000 No.
01:20:38.000 Hi, what's going on?
01:20:40.000 How are you?
01:20:41.000 Yeah, I need life, Alan.
01:20:46.000 Mm-hmm.
01:20:47.000 Told you, assholes.
01:20:50.000 Yeah, I was heading north.
01:20:52.000 Alright, so they called the Prime Minister of Croatia, President of Croatia.
01:20:59.000 And shut this down.
01:21:01.000 Credits.
01:21:02.000 So they're...
01:21:09.000 So are they being protected?
01:21:10.000 I mean, he had a hood on his face.
01:21:12.000 I'm lost right now.
01:21:13.000 Why did they give us weapons before they started picking us off?
01:21:16.000 To make it more fair?
01:21:18.000 Yes?
01:21:19.000 And what was over that pig?
01:21:21.000 I thought they were all vegans.
01:21:24.000 Me too.
01:21:26.000 Wait, he's a spy.
01:21:29.000 This is all fake.
01:21:31.000 The train, the refugees, the guys, all fake.
01:21:40.000 Dude, if there was a refugee camp and one of them blew up because a grenade was in his crutch, the fucking media would be there.
01:21:49.000 It would be a huge thing.
01:21:50.000 If you're in the real world now.
01:21:51.000 Yeah.
01:21:52.000 They're not in the real world.
01:21:53.000 It's all fake.
01:21:55.000 And that guy is part of the setup.
01:21:57.000 Yeah.
01:21:57.000 He's going to stab right now.
01:21:58.000 Yeah, look at his hat.
01:21:59.000 Yeah, he really.
01:22:00.000 I'm a dumb redneck.
01:22:02.000 I like fucking Trump.
01:22:03.000 I got Brandon.
01:22:04.000 I got a veterans now.
01:22:05.000 Fucking niggers coming in here taking our jobs.
01:22:08.000 Khaki shirt.
01:22:09.000 I hate them all.
01:22:11.000 look at these If your synopsis is incorrect, I'm very confused.
01:22:27.000 I'm actually not very confident about my synopsis.
01:22:33.000 What is this?
01:22:36.000 Where are we now?
01:22:38.000 I remember my gran is dead now.
01:22:40.000 He's lived in 98.
01:22:41.000 We're watching Indiana Jones, and the first scene in the film, it's not in Glasgow, is a Nazi's Boots.
01:22:48.000 And it starts, and it pans up him.
01:22:50.000 That's the first one second of the movie.
01:22:52.000 She leans over to me and she's like, who is he?
01:22:55.000 The individual even comes up.
01:22:56.000 You want to get back to the end of the conversation?
01:23:03.000 I don't know, Gran.
01:23:05.000 I assume it's the bad guy?
01:23:07.000 Let's pan up his body and wait for some swastikas.
01:23:15.000 Why you?
01:23:16.000 It seems so personal, right?
01:23:21.000 I have the same amount of information you do, and I don't know if you can.
01:23:23.000 This must have done something to pop up on the radar somehow.
01:23:26.000 Otherwise, why target you so specifically?
01:23:32.000 What?
01:23:33.000 You think it's our punch at the moment?
01:23:34.000 I'm not sad.
01:23:34.000 No.
01:23:39.000 There'd have to be a reason, is all.
01:23:41.000 All these terms.
01:23:42.000 Can you think of anything?
01:23:44.000 Wait, don't blame the victim?
01:23:45.000 That's liberal talk.
01:23:46.000 Sure is.
01:23:48.000 Yeah, she's not.
01:23:49.000 Oh, fuck.
01:23:52.000 Wow.
01:23:54.000 She trusts 0% people.
01:24:04.000 Oh, Wowie.
01:24:07.000 Are you out of your mind, woman?
01:24:12.000 Why can't this be?
01:24:13.000 Oh, that scared me.
01:24:14.000 Hello.
01:24:16.000 Are you guys bored?
01:24:19.000 Don't go in the camera.
01:24:20.000 You're on the show.
01:24:23.000 Is it like live?
01:24:24.000 Yeah.
01:24:25.000 No, it's not live, but I want to edit it.
01:24:26.000 I'm going to hover out.
01:24:30.000 This movie is so good.
01:24:32.000 Only watch it in the corner?
01:24:33.000 How long did it start at the forefront?
01:24:34.000 Yeah.
01:24:35.000 Watch It in the Corner.
01:24:35.000 Oh my God.
01:24:36.000 We have these parasite squatters who are looming like rats.
01:24:41.000 But it's gory, though.
01:24:41.000 But it's worth it.
01:24:43.000 No, it's really good.
01:24:44.000 Eldest boy, come in.
01:24:47.000 Elvis, my boy.
01:24:48.000 We didn't kill him until he told us why they're doing this.
01:24:52.000 It's like a puzzle.
01:24:55.000 Do you want to update her real quick?
01:24:58.000 It's hard to.
01:24:59.000 I don't even know how to start.
01:25:00.000 I'll take a urine.
01:25:02.000 I'll take a urine while you update.
01:25:04.000 Okay, so here's the story.
01:25:05.000 How far into it are you?
01:25:07.000 Oh, more than half.
01:25:08.000 Oh, crap.
01:25:09.000 No, I'm not going to watch it.
01:25:10.000 Just half.
01:25:10.000 No, no, don't go.
01:25:13.000 You might laugh at our jokes and it'll make us sound funny.
01:25:18.000 Okay, you know the plot though, right?
01:25:20.000 Elitists try to hunt down red stickers.
01:25:24.000 For a sport.
01:25:24.000 Right.
01:25:25.000 And they choose, like, deplorables.
01:25:29.000 People with blogs, people who say that liberals are snowflakes, blah, blah, blah.
01:25:34.000 And just right now, yeah, Alex Jones would be perfect.
01:25:37.000 So in this scene, he was talking about how you can't blame the victim.
01:25:43.000 And, sorry, I'm distracted by Ryan's annoying pee.
01:25:47.000 Everything about him is annoying, even his pee.
01:25:50.000 His pee stream.
01:25:52.000 So she, unfortunately, the winner of the whole movie is this badass blonde.
01:25:58.000 But she just booted him out of the car and took over the car.
01:26:02.000 And the guy she's with, because they ended up at a refugee camp because they jumped a train.
01:26:08.000 But we think, I think the train is fake.
01:26:12.000 The refugee camp was fake.
01:26:13.000 Everything was fake.
01:26:15.000 She booted who out?
01:26:16.000 The Deplorables?
01:26:17.000 This government official who was on her side, who was there to rescue her from the refugee camp.
01:26:24.000 The refugees again are the conservatives.
01:26:29.000 The Deplorables made it to a train track, and they jumped on a train, and there was a bunch of refugees on the train.
01:26:37.000 Because this is in Croatia.
01:26:41.000 It's fake.
01:26:42.000 So they covered European license plates with Arkansas license plates.
01:26:47.000 So some billionaires have bought an area in Croatia.
01:26:53.000 Hunger Games.
01:26:54.000 No, no.
01:26:55.000 It was like a...
01:26:57.000 It was like a...
01:27:00.000 Yeah, the Tourist.
01:27:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:27:01.000 Kill black...
01:27:03.000 It's exactly like...
01:27:04.000 Yeah, it's Hunger Games meets Tourist.
01:27:06.000 And he's hanging up his gown or his thing in the locker room.
01:27:09.000 He's like, so what'd you get?
01:27:10.000 Yes.
01:27:11.000 Sort of like sport hunting.
01:27:14.000 Wasn't that called The Tourist?
01:27:19.000 Okay.
01:27:19.000 Well, don't be here.
01:27:20.000 It's going to be on camera.
01:27:24.000 That's my wife, ladies and gentlemen.
01:27:25.000 Can I grab these chips?
01:27:26.000 Yeah, do you want pepper?
01:27:28.000 No, no, okay.
01:27:29.000 I'll be back for one second.
01:27:31.000 I got chips.
01:27:34.000 They were just in little baggies all set up in these.
01:27:40.000 But your beers.
01:27:42.000 Alright.
01:27:44.000 My wife has really risen to the occasion, by the way.
01:27:46.000 I think this is her ideal scenario is a pandemic.
01:27:49.000 Like, what did she just say?
01:27:50.000 Right.
01:27:51.000 Hey, can I have some of these leftover chips that were going to the garbage?
01:27:54.000 Yeah, do you want popcorn?
01:27:57.000 She was going to make a thing.
01:27:59.000 More than popcorn?
01:28:00.000 Yeah.
01:28:01.000 Do you want popcorn with extra butter and nutritional yeast?
01:28:04.000 Now we're locked up in the past.
01:28:05.000 Have you ever had that, by the way?
01:28:06.000 No.
01:28:07.000 Popcorn.
01:28:08.000 My wife didn't invent it.
01:28:09.000 My buddy mark did.
01:28:11.000 You have popcorn, you drench it in butter, and then you put on nutritional yeast.
01:28:16.000 It's like Parmesan cheese.
01:28:18.000 You know what?
01:28:19.000 I think I might have.
01:28:21.000 Alamo Draft House and they also have like I think they have cauliflower buffalo wings too.
01:28:21.000 Dude, it's just.
01:28:29.000 They have vegan options like that.
01:28:30.000 Somewhere I've had what you're talking about.
01:28:32.000 And it's basically, it is Parmesan cheese, basically.
01:28:37.000 I mean, like, you can't tell the difference?
01:28:39.000 Yes.
01:28:40.000 You know what?
01:28:41.000 There was a vegetarian restaurant in the East Village up until about maybe five years ago called Kate's Joint.
01:28:50.000 And they had these buffalo wings that were these cubes of these rectangular things of tofu.
01:28:57.000 Nice.
01:28:58.000 That they would deep and they would deep fry and lamb marinate.
01:29:05.000 They were heavy, heavy buffalo wings.
01:29:08.000 And a lot of the vegetarians would get sick because they couldn't handle the grease because they were meat eaters.
01:29:15.000 But, you know, we were meat eaters, so we would go there and, god damn it, they were the most delicious thing on earth.
01:29:22.000 You know, at Subway, I prefer the veggie patty, that vegetarian patty.
01:29:26.000 Because it's just that weird, microwaved fucking yoga mat.
01:29:30.000 It doesn't taste like meat, but it tastes good.
01:29:32.000 It's its own thing.
01:29:34.000 But it tastes good.
01:29:35.000 And good action, if you will.
01:29:39.000 But the cauliflower wings, too, it's not even a substitute to Buffalo Wings.
01:29:42.000 It's just its own thing.
01:29:43.000 It's amazing.
01:29:45.000 So I'm going to write down in my notes that I took a piss break.
01:29:48.000 No, no, this is all good.
01:29:50.000 Okay.
01:29:52.000 I'm going to cut out my mic.
01:29:54.000 We're in quarantine.
01:29:56.000 So this is all quality.
01:29:59.000 The only thing you don't want to do is bore the subscribers.
01:30:03.000 But I don't think this is boring.
01:30:04.000 Which is give them Tusk and make them a bunch of people.
01:30:06.000 I'm wearing fucking $900 shoes.
01:30:08.000 Is that boring?
01:30:10.000 Piss break.
01:30:14.000 How much of those sneakers I want?
01:30:17.000 Under two grand.
01:30:20.000 That's good news.
01:30:22.000 What are they called?
01:30:23.000 The off-whites.
01:30:26.000 A Nike Air Jordan 1 off-white.
01:30:28.000 And those...
01:30:32.000 It's nothing quiet.
01:30:33.000 Those are flags.
01:30:35.000 Like, we had an idea tonight.
01:30:40.000 Smash the subscribe button.
01:30:41.000 Smash the subscribe button.
01:30:42.000 No, but Ryan's got to do reviewing sneakers, but he's reviewing farts that have happened on TV, like Wendy Williams and that sportscaster guy.
01:30:53.000 Yeah.
01:30:53.000 So, like, this one was off the chains.
01:30:55.000 This one was super intense.
01:30:57.000 So, Mike Dick, Tory known for, like, you know, Totary best coach, but you should see him like rip a fastball like from his butt air.
01:31:04.000 Like, Totary, Tory sick.
01:31:06.000 No laugh.
01:31:08.000 That wasn't.
01:31:08.000 That wasn't my.
01:31:09.000 Okay, she's a bit of a.
01:31:10.000 That was my fault.
01:31:11.000 You have to understand my wife has been spoiled by non-stop zingers.
01:31:15.000 Because of you?
01:31:16.000 Yeah.
01:31:17.000 What do you mean?
01:31:18.000 Because of me.
01:31:19.000 No, because she goes to comedy clubs every.
01:31:22.000 We settled?
01:31:22.000 All right, we good?
01:31:23.000 Sorry for crunching on like everybody at home.
01:31:25.000 You said there are three at the gas station.
01:31:27.000 I don't trust him, by the way.
01:31:30.000 This is the guy he hopped the train with.
01:31:36.000 Just leave you all day.
01:31:41.000 Wait, now I do trust him.
01:31:43.000 What is that?
01:31:43.000 No, I mean, I do too.
01:31:45.000 Where Mr. Bullshit was taking us.
01:31:48.000 It since the driving thing.
01:31:51.000 It seems a little obvious.
01:31:53.000 Like, maybe he wanted us to find it.
01:31:56.000 Depends on whether they're smart pretending to be idiots or idiots pretending to be smart.
01:32:01.000 I said, fuck those fuckers.
01:32:04.000 He's Alex Jones.
01:32:08.000 Kind of.
01:32:10.000 Don't give him the key.
01:32:11.000 I don't even know if I trust him yet.
01:32:14.000 No.
01:32:17.000 Shouldn't trust anybody.
01:32:18.000 Actually, just shoot him.
01:32:20.000 now My mama used to tell me this story about the Jackrabbit and the Box Turtle.
01:32:32.000 The Jackrabbit is a real dick because he brags all the time.
01:32:39.000 He says nobody's faster than him.
01:32:43.000 And what is true.
01:32:47.000 Because every time he races, the Jackrabbit always wins.
01:32:51.000 He'll fucking force us to put up with this shit day in, day out.
01:32:54.000 Fucker always wants to race just to rub it in some more.
01:32:57.000 So the box turtle figures, why not?
01:33:00.000 I'll do it.
01:33:02.000 But I'll eat his toes off.
01:33:04.000 Like, okay, this would be fun.
01:33:06.000 Let's fucking go.
01:33:07.000 So, bah!
01:33:08.000 Jackrabbit leaves the box turtle in his fucking dust.
01:33:10.000 I mean, he is.
01:33:11.000 She's gonna kill him.
01:33:13.000 She's going to explain why he's a liar.
01:33:15.000 He wants to put him in the chair and make it seem like he stops and he takes a nap.
01:33:21.000 Takes a nap?
01:33:26.000 She's the hair.
01:33:28.000 He swipes longer than he wanted to.
01:33:32.000 Uh-huh.
01:33:33.000 Where's this story going?
01:33:34.000 Are you gonna shoot me?
01:33:36.000 Yeah.
01:33:37.000 Uh-oh.
01:33:37.000 I got a feeling you're onto me, and I'm dead.
01:33:42.000 Why do you have a shotgun in your hand while you tell a story?
01:33:47.000 Goes fucking wild later that night.
01:33:52.000 Box turtles having dinner with his family.
01:33:55.000 As they do.
01:33:56.000 Telling those little box turtles how he did it.
01:33:59.000 BTs.
01:34:00.000 I never give up.
01:34:01.000 You call them BTs?
01:34:02.000 Keep calling for them.
01:34:03.000 Everybody does.
01:34:05.000 You can't become just about anything.
01:34:07.000 Everybody does.
01:34:08.000 Everybody does.
01:34:10.000 Everybody calls box turtles.
01:34:11.000 I learned it from everybody else.
01:34:12.000 I didn't make it up.
01:34:13.000 I'm just following the trend.
01:34:17.000 JR's.
01:34:18.000 JR.
01:34:20.000 JR goes up to this TD.
01:34:22.000 Smashes up the watching T. Toad.
01:34:28.000 It's Dot Boxer.
01:34:31.000 He's dead.
01:34:32.000 Guarantee he gets shot in the head after this diatribe.
01:34:35.000 He sits down and eats their dinner.
01:34:39.000 Every last bite.
01:34:43.000 Why is she so good at being hunted?
01:34:46.000 Hmm.
01:34:47.000 She's like a wise old sage.
01:34:49.000 She's grabbing back for a...
01:35:00.000 I don't start telling Aesop fables.
01:35:06.000 I don't turn into mother goose for Christ's pets.
01:35:12.000 Oh, there's a pig.
01:35:13.000 Shoot it.
01:35:14.000 You see a pig with his shirt on, right?
01:35:16.000 Yeah.
01:35:20.000 See a boobie?
01:35:21.000 A little pig.
01:35:23.000 Wait, she did.
01:35:24.000 Wait, I'm lost.
01:35:25.000 Is he good or bad?
01:35:26.000 So she just told him that for...
01:35:30.000 For what reason?
01:35:31.000 They just ran over a man's head.
01:35:33.000 Hey, man, before we continue on this tour, can I tell you a little anecdote about a fucking jackalope that's got nothing to do about this turtle?
01:35:44.000 Oh, these are the elites hunting them.
01:35:45.000 Oh, yeah.
01:35:46.000 No.
01:35:46.000 Well, maybe.
01:35:48.000 Oh, my God.
01:35:49.000 We started cats at the beginning of this.
01:35:51.000 There's no dialogue.
01:35:53.000 It's 100% songs.
01:35:56.000 Yeah.
01:35:58.000 We made it half an hour in.
01:36:01.000 We got to James Gordon, I believe.
01:36:02.000 Buttholes were the producers.
01:36:10.000 There wasn't any not buttholes in the middle.
01:36:12.000 Oh, these Hispanic billionaires down there.
01:36:16.000 I fell in love.
01:36:18.000 Oh, she was pro-choice.
01:36:19.000 Don't joke about choice, man.
01:36:20.000 Please.
01:36:21.000 What matters is that Haiti is in the midst of a decades-long humanitarian crisis.
01:36:25.000 It needs all the help we can get.
01:36:26.000 Thank you.
01:36:28.000 Does it mean Martin Steven?
01:36:30.000 Oh, for sure, guys.
01:36:33.000 We're all on the same team.
01:36:34.000 They're lampooning the left.
01:36:35.000 Like these people are annoying.
01:36:41.000 This movie should never have been banned.
01:36:46.000 It criticizes both sides.
01:36:48.000 I think it's making fun of the times.
01:36:50.000 Volume control.
01:36:50.000 Period.
01:36:53.000 What was the name of that movie?
01:36:53.000 There we go.
01:36:56.000 Tears of the Sun.
01:36:57.000 I mean, that's actually what they called it.
01:36:59.000 Tears of the Sun.
01:37:00.000 Why is the Sun crying?
01:37:04.000 It came out?
01:37:05.000 You know, like at theaters and stuff?
01:37:06.000 Bruce Wilson's in it.
01:37:08.000 Hello, Bruce.
01:37:09.000 Cool.
01:37:11.000 Sorry, Dina.
01:37:12.000 Well, I'm going to go take a piss.
01:37:14.000 That's usually an illusion, by the way, when a writer mentions another film in the film.
01:37:20.000 So we should look up that film and see what happens.
01:37:22.000 It pertains to, yeah.
01:37:23.000 I I got that hat.
01:37:33.000 Didn't you wear it today?
01:37:34.000 Yeah.
01:37:35.000 Yeah.
01:37:37.000 Did you fart?
01:37:38.000 No.
01:37:40.000 It wasn't hot fire.
01:37:46.000 Chop his dick off!
01:37:48.000 Yeah, they a lot of a lot of cutting dicks off.
01:37:55.000 Don't slit his throat.
01:37:58.000 Why?
01:37:59.000 That's boring.
01:38:01.000 Cut his dick off.
01:38:02.000 Cut his dick off.
01:38:04.000 Like Lorena Bobbitt.
01:38:06.000 Who, by the way, served 30 days in a loony bin.
01:38:09.000 For what?
01:38:10.000 Community?
01:38:10.000 For sure.
01:38:11.000 Cutting off a dick.
01:38:12.000 And throwing a guy's dick into a field.
01:38:12.000 For littering.
01:38:15.000 And I told Anthony Coome, and he goes, what was the charge littering?
01:38:20.000 Holy shit.
01:38:21.000 That guy is so fucking funny.
01:38:24.000 It's intimidating.
01:38:26.000 You guys should do a show together.
01:38:27.000 It's like the Connor McGregor of jokes.
01:38:29.000 Why don't you Skype in with him tomorrow for the show?
01:38:32.000 There's tons of people quarantined that want to chat.
01:38:32.000 Yeah, okay.
01:38:35.000 There's tons of people quarantined that want to chat.
01:38:38.000 I do not sound like that.
01:38:40.000 Mikey!
01:38:43.000 Get him!
01:38:44.000 It's probably a bad time, but $70 fucking dollars, $70 for debt is a good deal.
01:38:51.000 Just tell them to fucking leave.
01:38:52.000 They're sleeping.
01:38:54.000 Yes!
01:38:55.000 They're sleeping.
01:38:56.000 We're actually being hunted right now.
01:38:59.000 Fuck.
01:39:02.000 Come on, man.
01:39:07.000 Yeah, you need to go.
01:39:09.000 You're causing a scene.
01:39:10.000 You're causing...
01:39:16.000 Oh, that's smart.
01:39:17.000 A pig was included in the initial box that had the guns.
01:39:22.000 What the fuck?
01:39:23.000 He was an innocent.
01:39:24.000 How the hell did that get in here?
01:39:26.000 That also shows they have more empathy for animals.
01:39:29.000 Yeah, they're making fun of liberals for being...
01:39:32.000 This is a right-wing movie.
01:39:34.000 *gunshot*
01:39:44.000 Might need to lower the smidge McGiggle.
01:39:46.000 Hyper.
01:39:48.000 Call me a pen.
01:39:50.000 No.
01:39:51.000 My answer is N. Oh.
01:40:07.000 By the way, if you hire...
01:40:21.000 What do you think's gonna happen?
01:40:23.000 The only way I could possibly Wow.
01:40:31.000 The only way it could ever possibly work is if it was remote.
01:40:36.000 And it was done with drones.
01:40:38.000 Imagine the right Trojan horsed this into the left of green for it to be like they pretended to be outraged.
01:40:46.000 What about this?
01:40:47.000 What if the banning was fake?
01:40:49.000 I know, that's what I said.
01:40:50.000 Yeah.
01:40:51.000 Fake banning.
01:40:52.000 This was fake banned.
01:40:54.000 They pretended to be outrageous.
01:40:55.000 They're like, well, if they're outraged, we have to release them.
01:40:58.000 Hey, publish this.
01:40:59.000 If you came up with the idea to fake ban this, you're fucking good at your job.
01:41:04.000 Oof.
01:41:04.000 Nice work.
01:41:06.000 There's something that you, in an interview on The New Yorker, where the guy goes, the Was what?
01:41:13.000 Sorry, what?
01:41:14.000 Meta?
01:41:14.000 Meta, yeah.
01:41:15.000 Yeah, we're correct.
01:41:18.000 I don't even know where he stands in the political spectrum.
01:41:21.000 It's hard to tell.
01:41:23.000 But is this possible that an artist on the outside would be like, all of it's silly?
01:41:27.000 Which is kind of...
01:41:31.000 I don't trust this fucker.
01:41:34.000 Fuck you, I dropped the pig.
01:41:37.000 Fuck you, I dropped the pig.
01:41:39.000 Yeah, he's bad news.
01:41:41.000 He's like Patrick Stewart in Charlie's Angels.
01:41:46.000 Spoiler alert.
01:41:47.000 By the way, Elizabeth Banks made Charlie of Charlie's Angels a woman.
01:41:52.000 Her voice goes through a vocord and changes it to a male.
01:41:58.000 And Bosley, the actual guy, has always been evil.
01:42:02.000 He's always been a bad guy.
01:42:04.000 Bad guy?
01:42:06.000 You don't like Bosley?
01:42:08.000 Boswell.
01:42:09.000 Is it Boswell or Bosley?
01:42:11.000 Boswell.
01:42:12.000 Boswell.
01:42:16.000 She's a woman.
01:42:18.000 She's a woman.
01:42:19.000 So he's got a man or something?
01:42:21.000 See, you gotta see, when they say liberal stuff, they're spies.
01:42:25.000 Mmm.
01:42:27.000 No.
01:42:29.000 What the fuck is wrong with you?
01:42:33.000 Don?
01:42:35.000 Don?
01:42:37.000 Did you get her?
01:42:41.000 What?
01:42:42.000 I told you!
01:42:44.000 I told you he's a spy!
01:42:44.000 Oh, no!
01:42:46.000 No!
01:42:49.000 I didn't want to believe it.
01:42:51.000 knew it.
01:42:52.000 This is how they...
01:42:56.000 Oh, no.
01:42:57.000 Fucking cuts.
01:42:59.000 You got me in an answer, huh?
01:43:01.000 Who's to blame for that?
01:43:03.000 You.
01:43:06.000 Cursing the carpet?
01:43:09.000 Oh, is Lent over?
01:43:10.000 Who is it?
01:43:11.000 Wait, Lent.
01:43:12.000 I talked to God.
01:43:13.000 He said that I could have some whiskey.
01:43:15.000 No, but my Catholicism is.
01:43:21.000 Oh, no.
01:43:22.000 It's a pandemic.
01:43:24.000 Wait, wait.
01:43:25.000 Oh, maybe.
01:43:26.000 What do you think about that?
01:43:29.000 Oh.
01:43:30.000 Don's gone.
01:43:31.000 I told from the side.
01:43:33.000 I told you to kill her and kill him.
01:43:36.000 Don's dead.
01:43:40.000 Who's me?
01:43:43.000 Then I guess you better come and get me.
01:43:49.000 These hunters are incompetent.
01:43:53.000 They kill everyone in the first, literally the first 10 minutes.
01:43:57.000 I heard them call you a consultant.
01:44:05.000 Are you trying these fuckers?
01:44:07.000 Yeah.
01:44:09.000 How much did they pay you?
01:44:12.000 Nothing.
01:44:15.000 What?
01:44:16.000 What?
01:44:17.000 That would hurt me.
01:44:22.000 And where is she?
01:44:23.000 Why?
01:44:25.000 You're what?
01:44:26.000 Is that Henry Rollins?
01:44:31.000 Henry Rollins?
01:44:34.000 Because I am what?
01:44:37.000 And uh, Told you.
01:44:48.000 I'm gonna look at a car rental company.
01:44:51.000 And there's nowhere to put that.
01:44:52.000 So maybe today, I can like...
01:45:06.000 I'm not familiar with this interrogation technique.
01:45:23.000 Sorry, sorry.
01:45:24.000 All right.
01:45:27.000 Three clicks northwest.
01:45:29.000 Told you she was going to be a human.
01:45:31.000 No, that's not a human.
01:45:32.000 She cried.
01:45:34.000 She cried.
01:45:34.000 She did.
01:45:35.000 Yes, she did.
01:45:35.000 She's a robot?
01:45:36.000 No, she's an actual robot.
01:45:37.000 She's insane.
01:45:38.000 They don't give these characters depth.
01:45:39.000 No, she has both.
01:45:40.000 She's just cried.
01:45:41.000 If you, you, my wife, were to do that, you'd go, oh my god, oh my God.
01:45:48.000 She's unsorry, sorry.
01:45:49.000 That's how you feel about it now.
01:45:52.000 She's unsorry.
01:45:53.000 But you poke a finger into an open wound.
01:45:55.000 Do we like her?
01:45:56.000 Yes.
01:45:57.000 She's not a robot.
01:45:58.000 She just cried because she was thinking about her.
01:45:59.000 She's not a southern accent.
01:46:00.000 She must be stupid and amazing.
01:46:03.000 She must be a little bit of a crazy person.
01:46:04.000 Well, that's what this whole movie is a parody of.
01:46:07.000 The underestimation of the intelligence of the southerns.
01:46:11.000 I'm so fucking bummed they spilt that drink.
01:46:13.000 Dude, she cried.
01:46:16.000 She killed him, also.
01:46:18.000 She cried.
01:46:19.000 No, she didn't.
01:46:20.000 Yeah, she just wiped a tear off her.
01:46:21.000 She was like, I used to work at a car sales place.
01:46:25.000 And she was trying to be tough through.
01:46:26.000 She was doing a character.
01:46:28.000 She didn't have to act for him.
01:46:28.000 No.
01:46:29.000 What are you doing in my office?
01:46:31.000 She didn't.
01:46:31.000 Because he didn't see her.
01:46:32.000 So she was in a flashback?
01:46:37.000 No, wait.
01:46:38.000 They kidnapped, like, CEOs?
01:46:39.000 This movie rules.
01:46:40.000 Let's see.
01:46:47.000 Hi.
01:46:49.000 So you're aware Martin's account got hacked last week, right?
01:46:52.000 Having the CEO here, everything.
01:46:55.000 And Martin's one of my closest friends.
01:46:58.000 So you know how embarrassing it was for him.
01:47:01.000 All the extramarital communiques, oncologists, pictures of his cock decks.
01:47:09.000 I mean, they were more than just the cock decks.
01:47:11.000 They were texts and emails, and he said some extraordinarily critical.
01:47:16.000 I'm sorry to pause the movie, but I think what's going on here is it is not just deplorables they hunt.
01:47:23.000 It's people at fancy corporations who make things uncomfortable for the owners.
01:47:30.000 So it probably started as a way to hunt deplorables, and now it's just like a way to get rid of the refuse.
01:47:37.000 It's the cancel culture.
01:47:39.000 Yeah.
01:47:39.000 And it's weird to be brave.
01:47:41.000 I'm watching this and secretly fantasizing about doing it to you.
01:47:45.000 Me?
01:47:46.000 But for why?
01:47:48.000 The president.
01:47:49.000 Oh, well.
01:47:50.000 For the president.
01:47:52.000 Don't do anything against the president and you know it.
01:47:56.000 I wouldn't be stupid enough to fly to Croatia.
01:47:58.000 I just wanted them to send me video of you.
01:48:01.000 Wait, what's going on?
01:48:02.000 Wait, what?
01:48:07.000 The wire transfer is happening presently.
01:48:11.000 It's like in the same state.
01:48:13.000 Yeah.
01:48:14.000 It was like a baby pig.
01:48:16.000 What's going on?
01:48:17.000 I fucked up one too many times.
01:48:22.000 Get better an afterfocus in your next life.
01:48:24.000 In your afterlife.
01:48:25.000 Don't you autofocus.
01:48:29.000 Even when I told you to put on autofocus to get the beer.
01:48:33.000 Not for the entire fucking show.
01:48:33.000 For the beer.
01:48:35.000 Day equals ruined.
01:48:37.000 Peter.
01:48:38.000 Infuriating.
01:48:39.000 Athena.
01:48:40.000 At least the hunt's coming up.
01:48:41.000 Nothing better than going out to the manor and slaughtering a dozen deplorables.
01:48:46.000 Manor, we promise not to talk about the manor on text.
01:48:49.000 Ted.
01:48:52.000 Liberty, deleting this threat.
01:48:54.000 What a strange name for your area.
01:48:57.000 Try and get it.
01:49:00.000 Are you aware there's an active group of people out there who believe this is a real thing?
01:49:04.000 Believe what's a real thing?
01:49:07.000 That you're hunting human beings for sport.
01:49:11.000 Ow!
01:49:12.000 Are you getting the shit out of your stick?
01:49:13.000 Stop blocking your eyes.
01:49:15.000 It hurts.
01:49:16.000 It hurts.
01:49:17.000 You have epicantic folds for this very purpose.
01:49:21.000 And I want to keep them epic.
01:49:24.000 What?
01:49:25.000 Yeah, conspiracy websites are all over.
01:49:27.000 Wait.
01:49:28.000 Does it hurt?
01:49:29.000 She was just killed.
01:49:30.000 I don't know the names of them all.
01:49:32.000 But anyway, somebody pulled a property tax banner that you bought in Vermont.
01:49:37.000 Oh, yeah.
01:49:37.000 Manor?
01:49:38.000 No, I don't own a fucking manor in Vermont.
01:49:41.000 It's a three-bedroom house.
01:49:43.000 Jesus, I can't believe you used that word.
01:49:46.000 Manor?
01:49:47.000 No.
01:49:48.000 Deplorable songs.
01:49:49.000 What manners?
01:49:51.000 Charged.
01:49:51.000 Oh, well, I initially.
01:49:52.000 I'm completely lost.
01:49:54.000 What part of Vermont?
01:49:55.000 Killington?
01:49:56.000 What would you prefer I call them, Hall?
01:49:56.000 What?
01:49:59.000 Gun-clutching home phone?
01:50:01.000 Stop, please.
01:50:03.000 Academically challenged racist.
01:50:04.000 Hey.
01:50:05.000 What about two deprived babies?
01:50:06.000 We have our best team at Reputation Management flooding, flooding the search engines in the hopes this thing doesn't go mainstream.
01:50:13.000 But even if by some miracle it doesn't, I really don't see that happening.
01:50:17.000 Do you know what's going on right now?
01:50:19.000 Richard did what he had to.
01:50:20.000 He's out of Blue West.
01:50:21.000 Julius and Miranda had to step down from their foundation.
01:50:24.000 Liberty exited for fun.
01:50:26.000 I'm sorry.
01:50:29.000 You gotta go.
01:50:32.000 Paul?
01:50:34.000 It was just a joke.
01:50:37.000 One joke.
01:50:39.000 Wasn't funny.
01:50:40.000 It wasn't real.
01:50:42.000 I mean, I wish this was a real thing.
01:50:43.000 It actually is real, Hillary.
01:50:45.000 Do some research.
01:50:48.000 Remember that movie where she was a boxer who won the Walter Waite Championship?
01:50:54.000 A million dollar baby.
01:50:55.000 Yeah.
01:50:56.000 She just fucking kicked ass.
01:50:57.000 She started at 40.
01:51:00.000 My wife just going, I'm going to become a world-class boxer.
01:51:03.000 That was Clint Usko.
01:51:04.000 You love that guy.
01:51:05.000 Yeah.
01:51:05.000 Yeah.
01:51:06.000 People believe I'm taking human beings at my manor.
01:51:12.000 What a fucking freebie!
01:51:17.000 This was Gary for USA.
01:51:18.000 He's called the Confederate Fire score.
01:51:23.000 It's actually kind of a hole in the plot.
01:51:24.000 What does FP stand for?
01:51:26.000 Like if people who were deplorable randomly started disappearing, how long would that last?
01:51:33.000 I mean, the people approximate to us are on 4chan, and they found Trilobuffs desolately cated in proximity to us are near us.
01:51:50.000 Yeah, adjacent to us.
01:51:52.000 Even close.
01:51:56.000 Is that a kimono?
01:51:58.000 That's appropriation.
01:51:59.000 With 4chan, they found Trilobufs.
01:52:01.000 See, look, it's a parody of liberals, too.
01:52:03.000 They lost their jobs and their reputation.
01:52:05.000 So did I, Miranda.
01:52:06.000 But I'm dealing with it with, you know, drugs and alcohol like a normal person.
01:52:10.000 Excuse me, did anyone else here get reassigned to Croatia?
01:52:12.000 No?
01:52:13.000 Because I didn't.
01:52:13.000 No?
01:52:14.000 It was a blessing in disguise.
01:52:15.000 We're going to build that gas station for pennies.
01:52:18.000 Next slide!
01:52:21.000 That guy died at the beginning.
01:52:23.000 No!
01:52:24.000 No!
01:52:25.000 Listen, listen, listen.
01:52:26.000 If we don't have at least one person of color in this problematic, I'm playing an Arab refugee.
01:52:31.000 I'm from Connecticut.
01:52:32.000 Isn't that a little problematic?
01:52:34.000 That was your idea.
01:52:35.000 What was your idea?
01:52:35.000 It was weird when you said it.
01:52:36.000 Because we need to lean into the stereotype.
01:52:40.000 To let them just expose their biases.
01:52:40.000 Correct.
01:52:44.000 Then they're not going to know why we're killing them.
01:52:49.000 Was there a black guy?
01:52:50.000 I don't remember.
01:52:51.000 It was the guy that got blown up with a grenade.
01:52:55.000 No, that was the Arab.
01:52:57.000 That's him.
01:52:58.000 No, the black guy they just showed the cowboy hat.
01:53:01.000 That was him leaning into the stereotype of the cowboy hat black guy.
01:53:06.000 That was the guy.
01:53:07.000 Oh, shut the fuck up.
01:53:08.000 It really was.
01:53:13.000 Oh, wait.
01:53:13.000 That's why he was like, I think he is guilty.
01:53:16.000 Yes.
01:53:18.000 The black guy said, you know, it's funny how they have a character in a film say, I'm not that person.
01:53:24.000 You're crazy.
01:53:25.000 And they're good actors because they're actors.
01:53:27.000 But they're also.
01:53:28.000 But you're watching it going, oh, she's innocent.
01:53:30.000 Leave her alone.
01:53:31.000 But it's actually...
01:53:34.000 Because you're used to like humans.
01:53:38.000 The black guy said, I'm from Connecticut and I'm not even Indian or whatever the fuck.
01:53:42.000 That guy wasn't black.
01:53:43.000 He was Arab.
01:53:45.000 The guy they showed on the screen was black, black and he black.
01:53:48.000 Oh.
01:53:56.000 Uh-oh.
01:53:57.000 So she's meeting Dr. Hillary's Hillary Sc.
01:54:01.000 Keep your guns and jump over some other part of the wall.
01:54:08.000 What are you doing?
01:54:09.000 They might have her in sniper.
01:54:10.000 And by the way, wait a minute, wait a minute.
01:54:12.000 Why do you live there?
01:54:15.000 You live on a hunting deplorables?
01:54:18.000 Mansion Complicit?
01:54:18.000 Yeah, what is it called?
01:54:20.000 You live in a place where you just hunt humans?
01:54:23.000 You're like way worse than any serial killer.
01:54:29.000 Actually, you're literally a serial killer.
01:54:34.000 Camp Incrimination?
01:54:34.000 What is that called?
01:54:36.000 The entire fortress you lose in?
01:54:38.000 Well, I was trying to start a mass camp called Concentration Camp.
01:54:46.000 Oh, that's a classic.
01:54:47.000 Have you seen it?
01:54:49.000 I actually masturbate to it every morning.
01:54:51.000 That's disgusting.
01:54:52.000 Do you know what it is?
01:54:54.000 Is it the same one that I saw where people are fused together?
01:54:58.000 Do you know what it is?
01:55:00.000 I'm trying to see masturbators.
01:55:01.000 Oh, Charlottesville.
01:55:02.000 You see that?
01:55:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:55:04.000 That deserves a rewind.
01:55:12.000 Hashtag Tottenham.
01:55:14.000 I'm in this movie.
01:55:14.000 I was blamed for.
01:55:16.000 You detested it on air all over the star.
01:55:19.000 You just farted.
01:55:21.000 We fart right in your face.
01:55:22.000 Where's Charlottesville?
01:55:27.000 That's Charlottesville.
01:55:28.000 Oh, yeah.
01:55:29.000 With the tiki turkeys.
01:55:32.000 There's Penn, Jen Pulette and Laura Loomber.
01:55:36.000 But that was the guy.
01:55:38.000 That's the guy that, one of the guys that survived that whole thing in the beginning of the movie that we hated?
01:55:44.000 That he's an unsufferable liberal.
01:55:46.000 Right.
01:55:47.000 So these are everybody, I guess.
01:55:49.000 Wait, is the implication there that people who were at Charlottesville should be shot in the head?
01:55:56.000 That's what's good about this movie.
01:55:58.000 It keeps you.
01:55:58.000 You don't feel the message.
01:56:02.000 Oh, there she is.
01:56:02.000 Or this.
01:56:05.000 I think she's in the NRA or something?
01:56:08.000 Die, bitch.
01:56:10.000 Go to the manor.
01:56:13.000 Like that scary Halloween place that people go to?
01:56:17.000 Do those torture challenges, the manor?
01:56:20.000 Remember that?
01:56:21.000 It's called hell.
01:56:23.000 No, it's called the manor.
01:56:25.000 It's a guy who puts people through these challenges.
01:56:28.000 Look, they haven't given this character any depth.
01:56:31.000 Like, show her trip or to have something to offer.
01:56:35.000 She cried.
01:56:37.000 I'm trying to tell you.
01:56:39.000 Oh, this is a cool twist.
01:56:44.000 Wait, what?
01:56:45.000 Did you pause it?
01:56:48.000 Do.
01:56:49.000 Did she?
01:56:51.000 That's Hillary Swank.
01:56:51.000 Hold on.
01:56:52.000 Yes.
01:56:53.000 I thought we knew that, even though she's the mastermind.
01:56:56.000 So she's.
01:56:57.000 Okay.
01:57:00.000 Yeah.
01:57:00.000 All right.
01:57:01.000 you're forgiven.
01:57:03.000 I don't think I was ever not forgiven.
01:57:06.000 Because I convinced you he was one of us.
01:57:08.000 Was he?
01:57:09.000 Maybe.
01:57:11.000 Oh.
01:57:12.000 Maybe not.
01:57:13.000 Hmm.
01:57:15.000 Who am I?
01:57:21.000 Who am I?
01:57:27.000 I don't know who you are.
01:57:29.000 I just know that you're crazy.
01:57:30.000 Fake southern accent.
01:57:33.000 If you know you're crazy, then you're not crazy.
01:57:37.000 So that just makes me feel mad.
01:57:41.000 Okay.
01:57:43.000 So who am I?
01:57:44.000 Crazy school.
01:57:44.000 Where are you going?
01:57:45.000 What?
01:57:47.000 Crazy.
01:57:48.000 Because we kept coming up and down the stairs.
01:57:52.000 To dry our feet off.
01:57:55.000 Right around the time your daddy was killed by the police when they raided the methamphetamine lab.
01:57:59.000 Your mother joined him soon after that.
01:58:01.000 Overdose.
01:58:02.000 Oh.
01:58:02.000 Probably the last batch of daddy stuff.
01:58:09.000 Hmm.
01:58:10.000 That's humanity.
01:58:11.000 You know, it's imply by a swank.
01:58:14.000 What's going on?
01:58:16.000 She knows all about her.
01:58:18.000 She said something about where she was raised.
01:58:22.000 Her dad got raided for having a methamphetamine lab, and then her mother overdosed on meth or whatever the hell.
01:58:30.000 So she knows her whole story, but so he's like, was Don in on it?
01:58:34.000 And he was like, maybe he was working for me.
01:58:36.000 Maybe he wasn't.
01:58:37.000 Maybe you don't know.
01:58:39.000 What do you know about me?
01:58:40.000 And then she said, I don't know, but I know you're crazy.
01:58:42.000 And she said, well, if you're crazy, then that means you could tell if I'm crazy.
01:58:46.000 And if you could tell that I'm crazy, then I'm not crazy.
01:58:48.000 And then blah, blah.
01:58:50.000 Some shit like that.
01:58:52.000 So they're just, I'm even more confused.
01:58:55.000 Sure.
01:58:56.000 Kind of girl cheese.
01:58:58.000 That is queer.
01:59:00.000 Grey air is good.
01:59:02.000 Nothing else has that kind of balance.
01:59:04.000 That's true.
01:59:05.000 After your mom died, you bounced from part-time job to part-time job to welcome back more times than I could count, honestly.
01:59:13.000 The only consistency was your inability to stay employed, which is fine.
01:59:19.000 This country belongs to the uneducated and ignorant as much as it belongs to me.
01:59:25.000 By the way, wouldn't it be funny to see that actress's background?
01:59:32.000 Which one?
01:59:32.000 The blonde.
01:59:33.000 Yeah, I have a feeling she's never done anything but succeed.
01:59:39.000 She worked at Muya Berger.
01:59:41.000 She fucking slayed.
01:59:42.000 She became the manager.
01:59:44.000 And then she got to something.
01:59:45.000 This is her first improv at UCB, and she fucking slayed.
01:59:49.000 She had a podcast that got nailed, but then she was like, then she was on SNL, and she was like, Lauren Michael said, please come on SNL.
01:59:58.000 She said, no, thank you.
02:00:00.000 And then they did Enrique Inglatius, Johnny Depp, Frenchman for some reason.
02:00:05.000 Can you be in our fucking hunting deplorables movie?
02:00:08.000 And she's like, what time of the year is it?
02:00:10.000 Oh, it's shot in fucking Croatia.
02:00:13.000 Yeah, my boyfriend lives there.
02:00:14.000 Sure.
02:00:15.000 My vacation in St. John's is almost done.
02:00:19.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:00:20.000 I'm just finishing a cheeseburger in St. Martin.
02:00:24.000 Because how is she so good and so anonymous?
02:00:26.000 She has so much confidence, you could tell, as an actress, but you've never seen her before.
02:00:32.000 We'll look up her IMDb afterwards.
02:00:34.000 You fail, we pay.
02:00:37.000 Because she's out acting Hillary Swing in this scene right now.
02:00:42.000 And we'll never see her again, I assume.
02:00:45.000 She's moved on.
02:00:46.000 Not you, Crystal.
02:00:47.000 You decided to go on the internet and wrap your stupid mouth.
02:00:52.000 Thirteen months ago you posted this on a...
02:00:57.000 Oh, you hear that?
02:01:00.000 That's why this movie is cool.
02:01:02.000 She just said, you decided to go on the internet and run your fucking mouth.
02:01:06.000 So this movie is anti.
02:01:08.000 The villains are anti-free speech.
02:01:11.000 Are you pretending to be more concerned than you are?
02:01:13.000 Because you're a singer too.
02:01:14.000 This is you right now.
02:01:16.000 No, no.
02:01:17.000 No, you're right.
02:01:19.000 But not only that, you decide to go on the internet and run your fucking mouth, and they are in a murder scene right now.
02:01:25.000 But do you know what happened?
02:01:26.000 Hilary Swank's character, when she was in that flashback, she was canceled by two people in a meeting because she said deplorables.
02:01:34.000 Oh, right.
02:01:35.000 They canceled her for saying deplorables.
02:01:39.000 And she was like, it was just a joke.
02:01:41.000 And then they canceled her.
02:01:43.000 So now she's about to do the same to that chick?
02:01:46.000 I guess.
02:01:47.000 I guess it's almost like you get abused, so then you abuse yours or something.
02:01:51.000 Like, ugh.
02:01:52.000 Kids being molested.
02:01:54.000 Yeah, it's like the gift that keeps on tormenting.
02:02:01.000 This bitch, Athena Stone, murders innocent men and women for sport.
02:02:07.000 Hillary Clinton.
02:02:08.000 The evidence is all there.
02:02:11.000 T-H-E-I-R.
02:02:16.000 Her manner, her travel records.
02:02:18.000 Oh, and in case you were still on the fence, she fucking admitted to it in a text message.
02:02:25.000 Are you rewinding?
02:02:27.000 No.
02:02:27.000 Wait, I didn't get that.
02:02:29.000 That woman does kill people.
02:02:31.000 No, she's making fun of her for spelling their, which you didn't get because you don't read.
02:02:37.000 No.
02:02:38.000 That's not true.
02:02:40.000 That's not true.
02:02:40.000 I read.
02:02:41.000 I mean, I'm a guy.
02:02:42.000 I'm always reading.
02:02:43.000 I thought they were making fun of their rep because he said they're rapists, they're murderers.
02:02:48.000 And it's contentious whether he said there or there.
02:02:52.000 Go ahead.
02:02:54.000 So she's criticizing her.
02:02:57.000 I love how, by the way, we're so retarded that we're watching a movie and we're breaking it down like it's some sort of fucking scully.
02:03:07.000 Hold on.
02:03:07.000 Let me pause.
02:03:09.000 I'm able to understand the last sentence that was said.
02:03:13.000 You might as well be looking at a fucking color book and going, I totally understand this.
02:03:20.000 What they've done is they've colored in the hamburgler in his appropriate prison colors because he is a thief.
02:03:29.000 And then they Have Grimace here.
02:03:31.000 The purple menace is what I call him.
02:03:34.000 He's colored in purple.
02:03:36.000 I totally get that.
02:03:42.000 Wait, this is a good idea for a t-shirt, though, isn't it?
02:03:44.000 With the red?
02:03:47.000 Everybody you kidnapped and killed.
02:03:52.000 That's because they busted you and your friends and buddies.
02:03:56.000 No, you busted us.
02:03:58.000 We were joking.
02:03:59.000 But you ignored my jokes.
02:04:00.000 Literally, you actually believed we were hunting human beings first.
02:04:05.000 So you hunted human beings on human beings first?
02:04:10.000 No, yeah.
02:04:11.000 It wasn't true.
02:04:15.000 But we decided to do it because you thought we were.
02:04:18.000 It's not a fucking manner.
02:04:20.000 It's a house I rented in Croatia and had decorated.
02:04:23.000 Okay, right, but it's yours in your hand, people.
02:04:25.000 So it's.
02:04:28.000 It's true.
02:04:29.000 Now.
02:04:29.000 Now it's true because you made it true.
02:04:34.000 They're saying that the right manifested the left.
02:04:37.000 I'm going to go out on a limb here and say this movie's fucking brilliant.
02:04:42.000 He wanted it to be true.
02:04:44.000 And one of the most brilliant parts about it is that it's bipartisan.
02:04:50.000 This is makers approved.
02:04:52.000 I don't know if this is fucking makers mark talking.
02:04:56.000 But this movie's fucking on point.
02:04:59.000 I give it one missing glasses crack, by the way.
02:05:02.000 That's dangerous.
02:05:08.000 You got the wrong crystal.
02:05:11.000 There's another Crystal MacRaezy back home.
02:05:14.000 She spells "A" with an "E".
02:05:18.000 Oh.
02:05:20.000 Hey, I get her mail sometimes.
02:05:23.000 I bet she's brilliant.
02:05:25.000 I bet that's brilliant, too.
02:05:26.000 And it's...
02:05:27.000 It does.
02:05:28.000 Because she doesn't think she's smart enough to come up with this, I bet.
02:05:31.000 Right?
02:05:34.000 She's lying, too.
02:05:36.000 She's lying right now.
02:05:40.000 Yes.
02:05:40.000 By the way, can't you just strangle this...
02:05:44.000 Let's call her right now.
02:05:45.000 No, you swank.
02:05:46.000 I'll give you her number and you can call.
02:05:48.000 It's not going to happen.
02:05:51.000 You don't really care about the truth, do you?
02:05:53.000 Of course I do.
02:05:55.000 The only difference is I'm right.
02:06:00.000 Isn't this kind of a hole in the plot that someone accuses someone of having a hunting camp and then they go and make it real just to spite them?
02:06:11.000 Like if someone said, I have a puppy dad where I boil alive puppies and eat them.
02:06:17.000 I was like, that's not fucking true.
02:06:19.000 You know what?
02:06:20.000 Fuck you.
02:06:21.000 And then I had a big kiddie pool of boiling water and boiled puppies and ate them.
02:06:26.000 Why should I show you?
02:06:27.000 Oh yeah, now it's true.
02:06:29.000 What do you think of that now?
02:06:31.000 I have an idea.
02:06:32.000 I think it's that this is a parallel to Hillary Clinton, but if they were to make it a character that's running for president, it would have been too bar.
02:06:41.000 They're talking about Hillary.
02:06:42.000 But this is a good way to compare it to Hillary Clinton.
02:06:46.000 That's what I'm thinking.
02:06:47.000 They compartmentalize the theories that she kills people.
02:06:50.000 Everybody thinks Clinton has a body count.
02:06:52.000 And are you basing your theory on the first name?
02:06:56.000 No.
02:06:56.000 What if...
02:07:05.000 And has the power to do it.
02:07:07.000 But has she done it?
02:07:08.000 I don't know if it's this corn juice, but this guy's starting to sound pretty good.
02:07:16.000 So this little Jap Reagan is starting to come up with some good ideas.
02:07:20.000 And then she's like, now I'm going to actually start killing people because you guys are.
02:07:25.000 Do we really have to keep listening to Beth Oven or can we fucking get home with it?
02:07:30.000 Oh, shit.
02:07:33.000 Yeah.
02:07:35.000 Ooh, that smell.
02:07:40.000 I was going to say, women don't want to fight like that, but no one does.
02:07:49.000 Like, if you broke into Conor McGregor's house, he'd probably go, you need to get the fuck out of here.
02:07:58.000 I called the Fogon police.
02:07:59.000 That was him.
02:08:00.000 Oh, no!
02:08:08.000 Do you think that fire is going to play a part in the beatdown?
02:08:21.000 Not much of a lanthus.
02:08:22.000 Did you burn me for one tenth of the tech?
02:08:28.000 Not a flamethrower.
02:08:29.000 Steve opened my eyebrows.
02:08:31.000 Big whoop.
02:08:35.000 Singe my views.
02:08:40.000 Whoa.
02:08:43.000 Nice catch.
02:08:47.000 What just happened?
02:08:48.000 That was pretty cool.
02:08:48.000 Did she just kick her like five feet away through that fireplace?
02:08:55.000 The Hulk?
02:08:55.000 What is she?
02:09:00.000 oh I need a gun.
02:09:08.000 Girls are so weird and all lesbian secretly that I wouldn't be surprised if they just start rimming each other.
02:09:14.000 Like...
02:09:19.000 Have you ever been in a fight like this?
02:09:21.000 No.
02:09:22.000 Oh.
02:09:23.000 That's the...
02:09:30.000 That's...
02:09:31.000 That's sign language for...
02:09:34.000 That's soundlangu for.
02:09:37.000 Don't even talk about it.
02:09:39.000 yes
02:10:07.000 If this was a real girlfriend on Reddit, it would just be here.
02:10:12.000 And then that weird ape thing.
02:10:15.000 Hmm.
02:10:16.000 There's no like.
02:10:18.000 It's a ballet.
02:10:22.000 Yeah, this is like cats.
02:10:27.000 At the 11th hour, she's gonna find something like a screwdriver.
02:10:31.000 And she'd be like, or not.
02:10:33.000 I love those rocks.
02:10:35.000 Yeah, what?
02:10:36.000 Those are wall rugs.
02:10:36.000 Those are nice.
02:10:37.000 I got walls up.
02:10:43.000 I got rugged on my walls, motherfucker.
02:10:45.000 I got rugs on my walls.
02:10:47.000 I got motherfucking balls.
02:10:49.000 I got people went in front and something hanging out the stalls.
02:10:53.000 Beautiful.
02:10:54.000 Thank you.
02:10:58.000 That is pre-book rap.
02:11:02.000 This is like all around a well done movie.
02:11:04.000 Chin, chin, chin, chin, chin, chin!
02:11:12.000 By the way, this is what we were talking about with the movie yesterday where we didn't spend any money on hits.
02:11:18.000 Right.
02:11:18.000 So everything is fucking Star Wars.
02:11:22.000 it's suitable i feel like this has more It's making me want to fight you.
02:11:34.000 You know what it'd be like?
02:11:35.000 Jock Cluso?
02:11:37.000 You know what it'd be like?
02:11:39.000 Jock Cluso and that little Asian guy?
02:11:45.000 You know the Pink Panther fights?
02:11:52.000 You're a good fighter, Hillary Swank.
02:11:54.000 You're a great CEO of a major corporation.
02:11:58.000 And you're also great at MMA for some weird reason.
02:12:09.000 Oh, no.
02:12:10.000 But the chick's going to pull it out of her neck and put it in her eye, just like the fucking bagdi in the movie.
02:12:21.000 I guarantee it.
02:12:37.000 That was good.
02:12:37.000 He was winning.
02:12:42.000 By the way, this is the only female fight I've ever seen with zero hair pulling.
02:12:48.000 How perky that guy did go?
02:12:51.000 This is like, uh, I Am Legend, where he's working on the zombie and she has perfect hits.
02:12:57.000 I know, who's lying down on there?
02:12:59.000 Why do you call me a snuggle?
02:13:01.000 It's a reference.
02:13:03.000 See, I knew they wouldn't start liking it.
02:13:06.000 This is like how I would draw tits if I was drawing this scene.
02:13:09.000 Yeah.
02:13:12.000 But why am I snowball?
02:13:14.000 What?
02:13:16.000 So I snowball?
02:13:17.000 Snowball is an idealist.
02:13:19.000 He wants to make the world a better place.
02:13:24.000 It's one of the other pigs that make up lies about him.
02:13:27.000 Turn him into the enemy.
02:13:30.000 If you're talking about Trump, that's correct.
02:13:30.000 Correct.
02:13:32.000 I think you should be snowball.
02:13:34.000 You had an animal.
02:13:38.000 Try to get out.
02:13:41.000 Yes, ma'am, I did.
02:13:42.000 Can I ask you a question?
02:13:49.000 Sure.
02:13:51.000 Are you Justice Royal?
02:13:55.000 We're both dead.
02:14:00.000 Excuse me.
02:14:04.000 I got there, Chris.
02:14:05.000 Didn't I?
02:14:05.000 No, ma'am.
02:14:09.000 You didn't know her.
02:14:11.000 Whoops.
02:14:19.000 I'm sorry.
02:14:20.000 She got the wrong person.
02:14:24.000 Might as well lie to her if she dies.
02:14:26.000 I don't think she did.
02:14:29.000 Why not?
02:14:30.000 Because they're both dying.
02:14:32.000 I know, but why wouldn't you just lie to her?
02:14:34.000 Why would she lie to her?
02:14:35.000 She's got to fuck her over.
02:14:37.000 But what does she have to lose?
02:14:38.000 Leave me a rhyme.
02:14:38.000 When you die to make her feel.
02:14:41.000 Did you always actually respect me?
02:14:44.000 I would go, yes.
02:14:49.000 That's important to lie to people when they die.
02:14:53.000 Oh, there's a baba la pou.
02:14:57.000 That's not the French word.
02:14:59.000 Whatever the hell animals.
02:15:01.000 Is that what's true?
02:15:02.000 You told me?
02:15:05.000 A babibu.
02:15:07.000 But for sure, it's a babib.
02:15:08.000 A babib.
02:15:10.000 Babib.
02:15:11.000 Most people just say babib.
02:15:13.000 So did she lie?
02:15:15.000 So she lied to make her die thinking she fucked up?
02:15:18.000 Yeah.
02:15:19.000 Gotcha.
02:15:25.000 Oh my god.
02:15:26.000 I got an infected wound.
02:15:29.000 I got a knife in my body.
02:15:32.000 I'm gonna burn my wounds shot.
02:15:35.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:15:38.000 More like Krim who lay down for a nap.
02:15:40.000 I'm gonna put on the gown with my burn shot wound.
02:15:46.000 Oh, is Hilary Schwink the one that put that stiletto in the person's eye on the plane?
02:15:51.000 Oh, I'm not.
02:15:52.000 Because we never saw her face.
02:15:57.000 go girl Hi there.
02:16:12.000 The uh assholes you work for tried to kill me.
02:16:19.000 So I killed him instead.
02:16:22.000 Now I want to go home.
02:16:25.000 that gonna be a problem?
02:16:27.000 Certainly not yet.
02:16:29.000 No.
02:16:31.000 Yeah, but what happened to you?
02:16:33.000 Yeah.
02:16:36.000 Here's the thing too.
02:16:38.000 Any super.
02:16:39.000 This is super cool ending, by the way.
02:16:41.000 Huh?
02:16:42.000 This is a super cool ending.
02:16:44.000 How about snack?
02:16:46.000 Wait, have you seen this?
02:16:48.000 I'm saying, this is a super cool ending.
02:16:50.000 It really is.
02:16:52.000 But here's the thing too, they're really Wait.
02:17:02.000 No, I don't think I'm really allowed to.
02:17:05.000 Well you are now.
02:17:06.000 Have sex.
02:17:09.000 Yeah, exactly.
02:17:13.000 That just made the movie.
02:17:15.000 Sitting in the same seat as the super snobby guy.
02:17:17.000 Yeah.
02:17:19.000 She's chugging fucking champagne with how is it?
02:17:23.000 It's like you're about to try it, bitch.
02:17:26.000 You tell me, lish.
02:17:28.000 Fucking greps.
02:17:30.000 That was awesome.
02:17:33.000 Fuck yeah!
02:17:34.000 Fucking yeah, motherfuckers.
02:17:40.000 What?
02:17:43.000 And Bloom nailed it.
02:17:47.000 Raymond Lindaroff.
02:17:50.000 Craig Zogl.
02:17:51.000 Nick Cusie.
02:17:54.000 I gotta end it.