Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E37

00:00:14.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Watch with Kevin McGuinness and put on the weather.

00:00:22.000 And I've trained myself to give up on the past.

00:00:25.000 Cause I've frozen time between horses and caskets.

00:00:28.000 Lost control when I panicked at the asset chest.

00:00:31.000 I wanna get better.

00:00:32.000 While my friends were getting high and chasing us down parkway lines, I was that is what's it called?

00:00:42.000 I wanna get better?

00:00:44.000 Yes.

00:00:45.000 Oh, nice move.

00:00:46.000 Smooth move.

00:00:47.000 By the bleachers.

00:00:48.000 By the bleachers.

00:00:49.000 Jack Antonoff.

00:00:50.000 He was also the songwriter and drummer and guitarist and everything for the band.

00:00:54.000 Fun, which also had a lot of big hits.

00:00:57.000 Remember Fun?

00:00:59.000 You don't like that band?

00:01:00.000 Oh, I hated them so much.

00:01:01.000 Why?

00:01:03.000 What?

00:01:05.000 Just the meek lead singer's face alone.

00:01:07.000 He looks like a lady.

00:01:09.000 He does look like a beta male, but they're a really great band.

00:01:13.000 His voice is shrill.

00:01:13.000 I don't know.

00:01:15.000 Okay, now we got to get into a fight.

00:01:18.000 We are young.

00:01:22.000 Could be a good song.

00:01:22.000 Women look the man on fire.

00:01:25.000 You know what?

00:01:26.000 He's trying to sing like a diva, but he doesn't have the range.

00:01:30.000 Oh, Mr. Range.

00:01:32.000 That's gay.

00:01:33.000 To talk about range.

00:01:36.000 He's no Mariah Carey.

00:01:38.000 No, he can't put his finger to the ear and whistle register.

00:01:42.000 Show that video.

00:01:43.000 It's really good.

00:01:43.000 But there's something.

00:01:44.000 The reason I chose that song is my wife and I were listening to it in the car coming back from a baseball tournament.

00:01:49.000 And I'm like, it's such a jam, but it also, ugh.

00:01:56.000 It's like got that Andrew WK super sound.

00:01:59.000 And I hate this video too.

00:02:00.000 It's all about therapy.

00:02:02.000 This should have been like an anthemic chorus of people running down the street screaming like at the end of Animal House.

00:02:09.000 Try it up.

00:02:12.000 That's a couple.

00:02:18.000 Is it the voice thing?

00:02:21.000 It doesn't hit as hard?

00:02:23.000 But yeah, just stop lowering the volume.

00:02:33.000 Maybe overdid the reverb on the vocals?

00:02:43.000 I was saying it lacked bass, but the bass comes in right there.

00:02:47.000 Maybe you guys aren't getting along because she's a three.

00:02:54.000 So it had, if you go like into the middle, there's a cool breakdown before the guitar solo.

00:03:01.000 But I've never heard of Take Your Daughter to Work Day.

00:03:03.000 My parents gave me this dog so I would get an abortion.

00:03:07.000 I think he tried to kill himself.

00:03:09.000 I don't want to be at work with a bunch of random people's daughters.

00:03:12.000 It's justn't in the song.

00:03:14.000 Waiting till I get dressed and then putting on the same thing is not fixing yourself.

00:03:19.000 I don't know how to power clash.

00:03:20.000 Maybe my problem is that you're such a stupid dick face.

00:03:24.000 Oh, they're killing the rundown.

00:03:26.000 That I'm not crazy!

00:03:26.000 The breakdown.

00:03:29.000 Oh, they ruined it.

00:03:30.000 This video ruined the song, and it's already...

00:03:33.000 Andrew WK knows how to make a power anthem where you just want to jump out the window and start killing and fucking everything that moves.

00:03:42.000 I think it's the drums.

00:03:43.000 Little soft on the drums.

00:03:45.000 Is that the problem with that?

00:03:47.000 It's the silent booster.

00:03:50.000 That's not silent.

00:03:51.000 What's that Andrew WK song?

00:03:53.000 She's so beautiful.

00:03:55.000 She's so beautiful.

00:04:00.000 He's got all these like shit.

00:04:03.000 I used to hang out with Andrew W. K. I discovered Andrew W.K. I should warn you.

00:04:06.000 That is bonkers.

00:04:08.000 When I discovered him, he was just, he had a ghetto blaster.

00:04:11.000 And he would sing over top of a CD.

00:04:13.000 That's what people did.

00:04:14.000 And that was in an art gallery.

00:04:15.000 People think he's like a jock.

00:04:17.000 He's an art nerd.

00:04:19.000 Kind of like Henry Rollins.

00:04:21.000 But you know what I was thinking about him the other day?

00:04:23.000 He's kind of, I don't want to say a poser, but he doesn't party ever.

00:04:29.000 He smokes a lot of weed and makes music.

00:04:32.000 He goes to bed at like 9 a.m. and just is in his studio all night long recording songs in a soundproof room that's in Midtown.

00:04:42.000 That's pretty rad.

00:04:43.000 Yeah, it's rad, but that's not partying.

00:04:45.000 No, that's not partying.

00:04:46.000 Partying, like, people with Down syndrome love to party, but they're not really partying.

00:04:50.000 They're just having fun with their friends.

00:04:52.000 Partying, sorry, it involves getting wasted.

00:04:54.000 Wait, where's the fucking music?

00:04:57.000 You've got to go back to the beginning.

00:04:58.000 You've got to go back to the beginning.

00:05:08.000 Four to the four drums.

00:05:11.000 The way he boxed the beginning of this song, too?

00:05:14.000 It's not the way Jocks behaved.

00:05:16.000 He's a weirdo.

00:05:17.000 I love him, by the way.

00:05:19.000 Weren't you going to do a whole episode on him?

00:05:21.000 I never knew girls existed like you Now that I do, I really like to get to know you Does he do all the music himself?

00:05:33.000 Everything.

00:05:34.000 Oh, shit.

00:05:35.000 When he tours, he gets the death metal band obituary.

00:05:39.000 That's awesome.

00:05:41.000 This guy's me.

00:05:43.000 Yeah.

00:05:44.000 Yeah.

00:05:46.000 Yeah, you guys are really similar.

00:05:48.000 White teachers?

00:05:50.000 Dirty?

00:05:51.000 He's what you would hope to be in one million years of trying to be awesome.

00:05:57.000 No, I'm cool.

00:05:58.000 Enough.

00:06:00.000 No, you're not.

00:06:00.000 I'm him.

00:06:01.000 That's not true.

00:06:02.000 That's me.

00:06:04.000 Thangs.

00:06:05.000 Your music is gay and it sucks.

00:06:07.000 No, it's awesome.

00:06:08.000 Your music is awesome and it rules.

00:06:10.000 No, no, my difference there.

00:06:11.000 No, mine rules.

00:06:12.000 Rules.

00:06:12.000 It sucks.

00:06:13.000 No, no, no, mine rules.

00:06:14.000 Oh, I bet it's true.

00:06:15.000 All right, that's enough of that.

00:06:17.000 Thank you.

00:06:17.000 I'm glad we got it.

00:06:18.000 Wait, before we totally abandon music, did I already wear this shirt on the holiday episodes?

00:06:22.000 I don't want to overdo a shirt.

00:06:23.000 I don't think so.

00:06:24.000 What's the two fun hits, though?

00:06:26.000 There's that anthemic one, but then there's the one with That's about the army.

00:06:32.000 We want fun.

00:06:33.000 No, no, no.

00:06:34.000 I'm not talking about Andrew WK.

00:06:35.000 The band fun.

00:06:36.000 Jack Antonoff.

00:06:37.000 Okay, yes.

00:06:38.000 Fun band fun.

00:06:40.000 Oh, oh, oh.

00:06:42.000 I know it's hipstery and it's handlebar mustache and it's barista, but the songs are well written.

00:06:47.000 What are their two things?

00:06:48.000 We are young and carry on.

00:06:51.000 Carry on, is that it?

00:06:52.000 Yeah.

00:06:53.000 What's the one with the battlefield?

00:06:56.000 Uh.

00:06:58.000 Great big storm?

00:06:59.000 No.

00:07:00.000 Just go by view counts.

00:07:02.000 God, you suck.

00:07:03.000 Some nights?

00:07:04.000 Maybe it's some nights.

00:07:05.000 Yeah, I think it's some nights.

00:07:06.000 Yeah, that's it.

00:07:07.000 Well, like come nights.

00:07:10.000 Get it.

00:07:13.000 There was some controversy because they thought in the song they said that being a soldier sucks.

00:07:18.000 But they didn't say that, I think.

00:07:20.000 Forget the controversy.

00:07:22.000 Look up controversy fun lyric after this.

00:07:25.000 Some nights I see you're catching in my back.

00:07:29.000 Come on, this is a jam.

00:07:31.000 A pretended journey or something in the 80s.

00:07:35.000 I don't like listening to Estrogym.

00:07:40.000 It makes me jelly too when I think of it.

00:07:42.000 Anything Civil War makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

00:07:46.000 620,000 men die.

00:07:48.000 The equivalent of 5 million by today's population.

00:07:51.000 And when they weren't shooting each other, they were very uncomfortable.

00:07:53.000 It's American Holocaust.

00:07:56.000 Oh, yeah, I was thinking of that, too, how hot they were in those wool suits.

00:08:00.000 And always wet trench foot.

00:08:06.000 You know who else loves this song?

00:08:08.000 Ellen DeGeneres.

00:08:09.000 Yeah.

00:08:15.000 Oh, that's Jack Antonoff.

00:08:17.000 We just saw him on the drums.

00:08:18.000 That's the guy from the bleachers who was just a therapist.

00:08:21.000 I'm the drum.

00:08:21.000 Excuse you.

00:08:23.000 Sorry, the drum single.

00:08:25.000 All right, that's enough.

00:08:26.000 Jack Cantonoff, by the way, dated Leah Dunham.

00:08:29.000 Yeah.

00:08:30.000 I sent you an article where it says they broke up and you look at the picture and you go, yeah, I figured.

00:08:36.000 He writes for Taylor Swift and he's a pop song machine, which is a very rare gift.

00:08:42.000 I'd say there's one every five years who can just churn out pop hits or any kind of hit.

00:08:46.000 Like, what's his name from Rancid?

00:08:48.000 Tim Husitz, who just would pump out all these punk pop hits.

00:08:55.000 I would liken it to being an MLB pitcher throwing fastballs at 100 miles an hour.

00:09:00.000 It's just that rare of a talent.

00:09:02.000 And he has it, and he chose Leah Dunham.

00:09:05.000 Maybe that's why the suicide attempt came in.

00:09:11.000 Look at the picture I sent you.

00:09:13.000 I told you I sent an email about it.

00:09:13.000 Okay.

00:09:16.000 And you're, what are you doing?

00:09:16.000 You're looking at like Reddit or something?

00:09:18.000 No, no, no.

00:09:19.000 I think the thing is that it's saying that it's okay to cheat on your soldier or something?

00:09:26.000 No.

00:09:28.000 Some nights, controversy, lyrics.

00:09:31.000 Yeah, that's Leah Dunham.

00:09:33.000 Look at her.

00:09:34.000 Now, I think he might be doing something that's actually quite intelligent.

00:09:37.000 And I did this in high school.

00:09:38.000 I lost my virginity to this slut called Big Kimmy.

00:09:42.000 And she was seen as a slut at school.

00:09:45.000 And that's bad for business as far as you ever getting with another girl.

00:09:49.000 So you have to revamp your brand because it's seen as cheap.

00:09:55.000 She's a wonderful girl.

00:09:56.000 It's sad that this had to be done.

00:09:58.000 But after her, oh man, that air drumming made my pen explode.

00:10:04.000 Dude.

00:10:05.000 Oh, man.

00:10:08.000 That's my genuine reaction to things.

00:10:10.000 Like, my toe could be missing.

00:10:11.000 I'd be like, oh, man.

00:10:13.000 Ah, geez.

00:10:14.000 Ah, that's such an aw man thing to happen, get covered in black ink.

00:10:18.000 Ah, geez.

00:10:19.000 This bites.

00:10:19.000 It's like when Lisa Simpson drew that picture of Mo that was really insulting and he goes, ah, you got the stink lines and everything.

00:10:29.000 That's how I feel right now.

00:10:30.000 Hey, Omaha like when you get a letter that says you look like Tarana Burke.

00:10:34.000 Oh man.

00:10:36.000 It sucks.

00:10:37.000 All right.

00:10:38.000 Problem solved.

00:10:40.000 So then I went out with this other chick named Christine, who was not very attractive, but was super funny and well-liked.

00:10:51.000 And then it was like, it was really cool that I love that you and Tammy are together.

00:10:56.000 You guys are awesome together.

00:10:58.000 I was like, yeah, whatever.

00:11:00.000 And then the next girl I got was like a nine.

00:11:04.000 She's a grade or two younger, but I had earned all this, you know, normal girl commission.

00:11:12.000 And that's why I think Jack was dating Leah Dunham.

00:11:14.000 His next chick can be an absolute whore.

00:11:17.000 Like he could have Iced T's wife.

00:11:19.000 Now, Coco, whatever her name is.

00:11:21.000 Because he did all this work with a woman who's very credible in the female community and totally not valuable to the male community.

00:11:21.000 Coco.

00:11:33.000 That is sad.

00:11:34.000 All right.

00:11:35.000 Did you find it yet?

00:11:37.000 No.

00:11:37.000 Why are you not good at things?

00:11:40.000 Some nights lyric controversy.

00:11:42.000 Nothing.

00:11:43.000 And the band name.

00:11:43.000 Nope.

00:11:46.000 There was an article, I'm guessing, that you saw about it, right?

00:11:48.000 Yeah, they had to clarify they didn't mean that.

00:11:51.000 It's like, what have I done?

00:11:52.000 What am I doing here?

00:11:53.000 Why did I join this stupid gay army?

00:11:56.000 Not quite that.

00:11:56.000 I see.

00:11:57.000 All right, let's move on.

00:11:59.000 I know that there's going to be a lot of people at home who want your job that are going to find it in a nanosecond.

00:12:03.000 Bet not.

00:12:04.000 You can email it to me if you find it.

00:12:06.000 Okay, frankly.

00:12:08.000 If you find it.

00:12:09.000 You got to make that video for Roger Stone today where you act like Donald Trump and tell people to go to Stone Defense Fund, is it?

00:12:17.000 I'll look it up and make sure.

00:12:18.000 I think it is Stone Defense Fund.

00:12:19.000 Why don't you look it up right now?

00:12:21.000 Human Snail.

00:12:22.000 It's a fun thing.

00:12:23.000 Yeah, you're giving up on that.

00:12:24.000 You failed that mission.

00:12:26.000 It's not here.

00:12:27.000 All right, let's talk about Oh my God, you're so torpid.

00:12:34.000 You're so lugubrious.

00:12:37.000 What?

00:12:38.000 Why are you still with fun lyrics?

00:12:40.000 This is torture.

00:12:43.000 Is everyone at home suffering like I am?

00:12:45.000 It is.

00:12:46.000 Working with you is like a slow-motion colonoscopy.

00:12:50.000 What's the name of the URL?

00:12:51.000 StoneDefenseFund.com.

00:12:57.000 All right.

00:12:58.000 Let's talk about some hot chicks.

00:12:59.000 This is a fun.

00:13:00.000 Yesterday was a heavy day.

00:13:02.000 We had to talk about gun violence, and we have a few serious things.

00:13:05.000 We've got a murder coming up.

00:13:06.000 But I wanted to have a bit of fun.

00:13:09.000 Let's talk about hotties.

00:13:10.000 I love talking about hotties.

00:13:12.000 And amidst all of this border stuff, there is a random chick who has appeared.

00:13:20.000 And she's known violally as Ice Bay.

00:13:24.000 And she is a border guard in Texas.

00:13:26.000 There's a picture of her right above me.

00:13:28.000 And she is a pretty solid And this is definitely a 7.89.

00:13:43.000 What do you think?

00:13:47.000 It's the same race as you, right?

00:13:49.000 She's got my nose.

00:13:50.000 I'm not Mexican.

00:13:51.000 Yes, you are.

00:13:52.000 No, I'm not.

00:13:54.000 Puerto Rican?

00:13:55.000 I'm Andrew W.K. You don't.

00:13:58.000 You guys are about the same height.

00:13:58.000 Yeah.

00:14:00.000 He's probably 6'4.

00:14:02.000 His shoulders are as wide as a Honda Civic.

00:14:05.000 That's about you, right?

00:14:07.000 It's funny when you read the British press about Andrew.

00:14:07.000 Yep.

00:14:07.000 Yeah.

00:14:11.000 They're not used to seeing a normal-looking, handsome gentleman.

00:14:14.000 So they're like, with his model runway looks and his mile-high cheekbones, Andrew W.K. And it's just like a dude.

00:14:21.000 Just like a normal guy that would be in sales at your company.

00:14:26.000 So show the video of Ice Bay.

00:14:28.000 There she is.

00:14:30.000 What would you give her there?

00:14:32.000 I'm not impressed.

00:14:34.000 Are those boobs fake?

00:14:36.000 Why do girls do that when they're young?

00:14:38.000 First of all, never have fake tits, but at least if you are, wait until they're terrible.

00:14:42.000 Are they fake?

00:14:43.000 Oh, yeah.

00:14:44.000 Yeah, I'd say there's fake tits.

00:14:45.000 That's no makeup.

00:14:47.000 I'm not impressed.

00:14:49.000 Wow, you're picky.

00:14:51.000 7.7 cheeks and the nose.

00:14:52.000 I would never go below 7.7, and that feels really mean.

00:14:58.000 Which brings us to someone was saying that we need to have more standard American beauties on our 25 list, which we should really revamp that list and tackle it.

00:15:07.000 But someone was suggesting Paige Spiranak.

00:15:10.000 She's a Sab.

00:15:11.000 She's a Sab for sure.

00:15:13.000 She's a what?

00:15:14.000 Standard American Beauty.

00:15:15.000 Sab.

00:15:16.000 Standard American Beauty.

00:15:16.000 Sab.

00:15:17.000 Did we make that a thing?

00:15:19.000 I don't think that's her, by the way.

00:15:21.000 I think someone made a mistake.

00:15:22.000 Oh, really?

00:15:23.000 Yeah.

00:15:25.000 But the other pictures are her.

00:15:27.000 Okay.

00:15:28.000 So stay there.

00:15:30.000 Jesus.

00:15:31.000 That's not a very good picture of her.

00:15:33.000 Really?

00:15:35.000 Yeah, let's see some more.

00:15:38.000 There's Paige.

00:15:40.000 Yeah.

00:15:41.000 This is standard American beauty.

00:15:44.000 This is really hard to explain, but that's not my type.

00:15:48.000 I get you.

00:15:49.000 And you know what it might be?

00:15:51.000 Those kind of standard cheerleader super blondes were never attracted to me.

00:15:55.000 So I think as a survival mechanism, my tastes have morphed.

00:16:00.000 Like, I've always been into sort of ethnically ambiguous brunettes.

00:16:04.000 And that might be because those are the only ones who would give me the time of day.

00:16:07.000 So I altered my tastes into that.

00:16:12.000 You know what?

00:16:13.000 There's a difference between hot and having like no flaws.

00:16:16.000 And hot doesn't mean sexy either.

00:16:18.000 Right.

00:16:19.000 Like the Victoria's Secret Girls are perfect, but I'm just like.

00:16:23.000 Yeah.

00:16:24.000 There's nothing to latch on to there.

00:16:26.000 And when you get to that level of beauty, you become kind of masculine with the cow catcher chin and the strong features.

00:16:33.000 You're like, I could shave your head and give you a three-piece suit, and you'd look like at least like Rup Hall when he dresses up like a dude.

00:16:41.000 That's a cool one.

00:16:42.000 Because her lips are a little puffier there.

00:16:45.000 Yeah, and maybe going out with her would be heaven on earth.

00:16:47.000 I don't think I've ever dated a normal hot blonde.

00:16:51.000 Maybe it's the greatest thing ever.

00:16:53.000 NHB.

00:16:54.000 It's like hanging out with your fraternal twin.

00:16:58.000 Yeah, I see what you mean.

00:16:59.000 There's really not much there.

00:17:00.000 I don't know.

00:17:00.000 I need like a gap in the teeth or a mole.

00:17:03.000 That's kind of cute because you got the pixie nose.

00:17:05.000 Or acne.

00:17:06.000 If she had acne scars.

00:17:08.000 That's fun.

00:17:09.000 You know what I mean?

00:17:09.000 She had this disease where it was brutal flatulence non-stop.

00:17:14.000 She sounded like a motorboat walking down the street.

00:17:16.000 Yeah.

00:17:19.000 All right.

00:17:20.000 This brings us to the news.

00:17:21.000 Eliza Schlesinger, by the way.

00:17:22.000 Oh, is that her?

00:17:23.000 No, Eliza Schlesinger.

00:17:23.000 Who's that?

00:17:25.000 She's a comedian.

00:17:26.000 Yeah, that's a little too not beautiful.

00:17:30.000 That's a bunny wabbit.

00:17:31.000 Oh, I've seen her.

00:17:32.000 She dresses kind of like slutty, fancy.

00:17:36.000 Yeah.

00:17:36.000 Yeah, I don't know.

00:17:37.000 She looks like my friend Frankie too much.

00:17:41.000 Okay, that's what the readers really want to, viewers really want to hear about is someone, some stranger.

00:17:46.000 You got to understand you're talking to people, Ryan.

00:17:49.000 I went to school with some kid named Frankie.

00:17:51.000 Yeah, no one knows what you're talking about.

00:17:53.000 Man, he looks like that, but with no hair.

00:17:55.000 Should I undo this one more?

00:17:56.000 No.

00:17:57.000 Yeah, actually.

00:17:59.000 Not two shabs.

00:18:01.000 I want to look like a deadbeat dad who is a bartender in Hawaii.

00:18:07.000 That's fun.

00:18:08.000 And I can't drive because of my Deweys, so I take the bus.

00:18:13.000 I'm the only white guy on the bus in New Smyrna Beach, Florida, outside of Orlando.

00:18:18.000 Boat shoes, brand new.

00:18:19.000 I don't leave in the summer, too.

00:18:21.000 I don't mind the heat.

00:18:22.000 I just wear my flip-flops.

00:18:23.000 You need a Puka Shell necklace.

00:18:25.000 Blew up my flip-flop.

00:18:28.000 All right, so Puerto Rico is having some kind of revolution.

00:18:31.000 I don't know.

00:18:31.000 They got a new governor they're not a fan of.

00:18:34.000 I guess he's a jerk.

00:18:35.000 Puerto Rico, by the way, remember we said Trump, we were, Trump was criticized for saying, I'm giving the money for this hurricane, but you know all the politicians are going to take it.

00:18:43.000 It's so corrupt there.

00:18:44.000 And everyone got mad at him.

00:18:45.000 That's apparently racist now to say that Puerto Rican politicians are corrupt.

00:18:51.000 And then there was a massive swamp drain where they arrested like five major political figures in Puerto Rico.

00:18:59.000 And so I guess they've got a replacement now.

00:19:01.000 And the people are not a fan.

00:19:04.000 They're not fans of this new guy.

00:19:05.000 Look at it.

00:19:06.000 This is going down.

00:19:09.000 Oh.

00:19:11.000 That's Fuego.

00:19:12.000 Uh-oh.

00:19:14.000 What are they saying, Ryan?

00:19:17.000 We don't like it.

00:19:20.000 We don't like it?

00:19:21.000 This stinks.

00:19:23.000 Yeso stinkos?

00:19:25.000 Yeah.

00:19:27.000 They sang, ay que fueg.

00:19:31.000 So I sent you this as a separate.

00:19:33.000 Renanciado.

00:19:33.000 What's that?

00:19:34.000 I guess that means renounce.

00:19:37.000 I sent you a picture, though.

00:19:38.000 Sorry to not abandon the perv angle we're going for here.

00:19:42.000 I think women like this perv stuff, by the way.

00:19:44.000 Oh, is it?

00:19:45.000 they get to hear how men talk behind closed doors, and they realize that they were a lot less predictable than they thought.

00:19:54.000 Okay, so I'm looking at this picture, and I don't know why women think...

00:20:03.000 Siempre puta.

00:20:04.000 What is that?

00:20:06.000 Always a whore.

00:20:07.000 Always a whore.

00:20:10.000 And that's not true, by the way.

00:20:11.000 Is she saying that men always see women as whores?

00:20:14.000 No, that's not true.

00:20:14.000 Oh, I see.

00:20:15.000 You got to be a real slut before we think of you as a whore.

00:20:18.000 And you're the one having slut walks and stuff.

00:20:20.000 But anyway, while I was looking at this picture, I just couldn't help but think that no matter how much women try to just be you still, their innate beauty just emanates from them.

00:20:34.000 Like, look at the ribs under that right breast.

00:20:37.000 Yeah, that's cool.

00:20:39.000 And the shape of her legs, her stature.

00:20:43.000 Everything is just so smooth.

00:20:45.000 What is that?

00:20:46.000 The studio next door blaring music?

00:20:49.000 Maybe workers in the hallway.

00:20:52.000 Is that Jimmy?

00:20:54.000 What a douche.

00:20:55.000 No, that's Sunshine by Cream.

00:20:57.000 Oh, duh.

00:20:59.000 But yeah, I know what you mean.

00:21:01.000 Like, I saw some woman, she was at the airport.

00:21:01.000 You know what I mean?

00:21:03.000 She was just sitting down reading a book, and the way her legs were sort of poised, it could have been a statue in Rome.

00:21:10.000 They're just, everything about them is just so elegant.

00:21:14.000 And I'm not talking about the fat pigs who vandalize their bodies, but when they're just normal and in a normal amount of shape, just even when they run, they're just like the way their shoes go on the ground.

00:21:25.000 It's just everything about them is so woman.

00:21:28.000 Graceful.

00:21:30.000 Even like, I don't know, the way they eat, there's just this innate beauty in women that men will never have.

00:21:40.000 Maybe they see us the same way.

00:21:41.000 Even in boxing.

00:21:43.000 Even when the little Latina is at my gym, what are you doing?

00:21:46.000 Dainty.

00:21:47.000 What are you doing with your phone?

00:21:50.000 The parlor post came up.

00:21:51.000 Speaking of Puerto Rico.

00:21:54.000 A parlor post came up, yes.

00:21:56.000 And it clarifies the word poppy.

00:21:59.000 Okay.

00:22:00.000 So you're checking parlor as we do the show?

00:22:03.000 No, no, no, I'm prepping it.

00:22:04.000 And listening.

00:22:05.000 Oh, I see.

00:22:06.000 So something came up you thought it'd be interesting for the show, and you're playing it, even though we haven't talked about poppy for 24 hours.

00:22:13.000 Well, we're talking about Puerto Rico.

00:22:14.000 Oh, okay.

00:22:15.000 That's fair.

00:22:16.000 That's fair.

00:22:19.000 So hot chicks are getting naked, saying I'm always a slut.

00:22:23.000 Is that maybe the new governor is pro-life?

00:22:27.000 This isn't a very informative news show, is it?

00:22:30.000 People in Puerto Rico are freaking out about something.

00:22:32.000 And some of the women who are freaking out wrote slut on their butt, and they look gorgeous.

00:22:36.000 And look, a fire.

00:22:37.000 That's my news.

00:22:39.000 And some sort of fire is going on.

00:22:43.000 Tune in.

00:22:44.000 What are you doing, dude?

00:22:45.000 All right.

00:22:46.000 I'm just going to read it.

00:22:47.000 It's as follows.

00:22:52.000 Papi literally means daddy and papa means dad.

00:22:56.000 But it's used as a terminal of endearment in Puerto Rico in the Caribbean.

00:22:59.000 Papi and mommy are also the way couples refer to each other.

00:23:01.000 Maybe old Puerto Rican thought that you were flirting or something.

00:23:05.000 Yeah, I know.

00:23:08.000 It means like buddy, but almost honey.

00:23:10.000 Yeah.

00:23:11.000 Like you'll yell to your kid, hey, Poppy, like your son.

00:23:14.000 But what you thought, you thought that he thought that you meant he's old.

00:23:19.000 I think there was an element of that.

00:23:22.000 Because it was like, daddy, you're my daddy.

00:23:24.000 So it was gay.

00:23:25.000 It was old.

00:23:27.000 It was too friendly.

00:23:29.000 There was a million things wrong with me calling him Poppy, although I don't think it would have been that bad if he was the grandfather.

00:23:35.000 All right.

00:23:36.000 So Lindsay Shepard is this Canadian feminist who's normal and reasonable.

00:23:43.000 You know, like Cornell West is a liberal, but he's a free speech liberal from old school 1960s Berkeley.

00:23:50.000 So he's one of the good ones.

00:23:51.000 Lindsay Shepard, I'm trying to get her on the show, but it's like getting nuts to a squirrel and she doesn't want to be a monster forever.

00:23:57.000 But she was cannibalized by her fellow leftists for not supporting trans.

00:24:04.000 And I can't remember how I came across this, but warning, this is about to get super raunchy.

00:24:09.000 So there's some trans person who is, this is just a fat pervert.

00:24:15.000 And his name is, what?

00:24:16.000 Jessica Yanov?

00:24:18.000 No, go back to the tweet.

00:24:20.000 Go back to the tweet.

00:24:21.000 Go back to the tweet.

00:24:22.000 Go back to the tweet!

00:24:29.000 And then, so go up a bit.

00:24:31.000 What exactly does he say?

00:24:32.000 At least my pussy is tight and not loose after pushing out a 10-pound baby.

00:24:38.000 Great for using BABA vibrators and dildos, and the pleasure is just amazing.

00:24:43.000 That reminds me, I need to do a review.

00:24:45.000 Soraya.

00:24:47.000 Lots of juice there.

00:24:48.000 And Lindsay goes, how to tell someone is definitely not a woman.

00:24:51.000 They say things like this, L-M-A-O.

00:24:54.000 So Lindsay Shepard was booted from Twitter for this.

00:25:00.000 I think this is ancient news.

00:25:02.000 But so I looked into this Jessica Yanov person who's writing about his vagina like it exists and bragging about how fresh it is.

00:25:14.000 This is a man saying this.

00:25:17.000 I think it's an ugly, fat, nerd, perverted, straight male who's noticed he gets attention when he calls himself a proud lesbian who will never give up fighting for the rights of his fellow women.

00:25:30.000 Look at, click on that picture.

00:25:35.000 When there's no chance in Hades of you getting laid as a dude, then become an ugly fat chick like Leah Dunham, and all of a sudden, I don't know, you're getting some attention, and people get banned when they laugh at you.

00:25:50.000 And this guy just talks about his vagina all the time.

00:25:53.000 Hey, look at the foot.

00:25:54.000 Ugh.

00:25:55.000 Trying to replicate that daintiness you were talking about.

00:25:57.000 Yeah, that's...

00:26:06.000 They have gay sex and they feel like women all the time.

00:26:10.000 And that, that, and they're lying there being you know made love to, and they go, I feel like a woman, but I'm not a woman, and I see women, and that for them, it's just a jigsaw puzzle piece, and everything makes sense.

00:26:23.000 They're elegant, and then the man's with them, and they're they're lying on the bed, and it just looks like they're supposed to be there, and I feel incongruous.

00:26:31.000 And that must bug you.

00:26:32.000 I bet they have a higher suicide rate than men.

00:26:36.000 I know trans definitely do.

00:26:38.000 So, this is my theory.

00:26:41.000 I think drag queens are gay men going, you know what?

00:26:44.000 I'm sick of this looming weird feeling that I'm a freak and that I'm a bastardized woman.

00:26:51.000 I'm going to make fun of it.

00:26:53.000 And I think that's a healthy thing to do.

00:26:55.000 Joking, you know?

00:26:57.000 So when you see a man in drag, he's saying, he's lampooning this bizarre feeling you must have as a gay where you're just not right in your skin.

00:27:07.000 And so you get this crazy thing and you go, yeah, I'm not right in my skin.

00:27:12.000 Get over it, me.

00:27:14.000 You know, the way cops make jokes about horrible things.

00:27:17.000 So good, that's healthy.

00:27:18.000 Go nuts.

00:27:19.000 Have fun.

00:27:20.000 That's nothing to do with children.

00:27:23.000 This is why it's wrong to have drag queen story time and to have drag kids and Desmond is amazing because drag queenism is a coping mechanism for the strange feeling you have when you have a bizarre, sorry, but it's considered abnormal when you define normal as what's most common.

00:27:43.000 You're 1% of the population.

00:27:44.000 That's technically, that's unusual.

00:27:46.000 So when you have this unusual sexual proclivity, you need a coping mechanism.

00:27:51.000 They chose dressing up as the person they're not, like Halloween.

00:27:54.000 Halloween, the pagan ritual, was to dress up as the dead to confront our innate fear of death.

00:28:02.000 Exact same thing with drag queens.

00:28:03.000 Don't drag kids into it.

00:28:06.000 Actually, you could say the same about Halloween.

00:28:08.000 Kids aren't scared of dying.

00:28:09.000 Stop dragging them into Halloween.

00:28:11.000 It's our holiday.

00:28:12.000 Death and sex are two things that you stay clear of.

00:28:16.000 Yeah.

00:28:16.000 Keep away from kids.

00:28:17.000 Time to throw a party.

00:28:18.000 Hatred has no place in this world.

00:28:19.000 Bye, Felicity.

00:28:22.000 Oh, yeah.

00:28:22.000 So this is her celebrating that Lindsay Shepard is banned.

00:28:24.000 Is that a recent tweet?

00:28:26.000 This was not too long ago.

00:28:28.000 Let me see.

00:28:28.000 July 15th.

00:28:30.000 Oh, that's right around the corner.

00:28:32.000 So Jessica Yanov, I look him up.

00:28:34.000 It's John Yanov.

00:28:36.000 And check out that link I sent you.

00:28:39.000 He's a predator.

00:28:40.000 Jonathan Yanov is a trans-identified male involved in the tech industry and has been on a litigious campaign against women in BC.

00:28:48.000 He currently has 16 open suits against women for refusing to wax his testicles on the basis of gender discrimination.

00:28:58.000 Yes, you read that correctly.

00:29:00.000 Yes, we are living in clown world.

00:29:04.000 He goes to bikini waxing places and says, hi, can you tend to my vagina?

00:29:09.000 And they go, well, it looks a hell of a lot like penis and balls to me.

00:29:12.000 And he sues them.

00:29:14.000 And in Canada, we have the Canadian Human Rights Commission.

00:29:16.000 But if you scroll down on that link, you see, what he's saying, go up a bit so you see what he says there.

00:29:22.000 No, no, no.

00:29:23.000 I meant, I want to see the caption below that picture.

00:29:26.000 Okay.

00:29:28.000 If there's like 30 girls in the change room, how many of them would you say are out there changing flea with their vaginas and tits out?

00:29:37.000 Is that what women do when they're in the changing room with each other?

00:29:40.000 They talk about having their vagina and tits out?

00:29:42.000 Or is that a mentally ill gay who's just decided to dress up as a woman because it gets him attention and might get him laid?

00:29:50.000 I mean, could this be a more obvious ruse?

00:29:53.000 But scroll down.

00:29:54.000 There's these disturbing chats on that thing where he's talking about how he has to ride a ferry and he's going to be going through heavy flow and he'll have to change his pads a lot on the trip.

00:30:06.000 You don't have to change your pad a lot on a ferry ride.

00:30:08.000 And then he said, what if there's a 12-year-old girl there and she asks me for help with a tampon?

00:30:13.000 He's sitting there jerking off with this disgusting fantasy while he asks his fellow women what to do when a 10-year-old girl asks you about your tampon.

00:30:23.000 This is a depraved animal.

00:30:26.000 And if you recall, I lost my ad agency for calling the majority of trans mentally ill gays.

00:30:33.000 This guy's worse.

00:30:35.000 He's a mentally ill straight, pretending to be a gay.

00:30:40.000 Look at that.

00:30:41.000 Do you see tits and pussy ever at the pool or the sauna?

00:30:45.000 He's a depraved pervert.

00:30:48.000 Weird autistic nerd.

00:30:50.000 That movie Jack with Robin Williams, like if you like, if there was a dark side of him, he says, so at the gym, do women bear all?

00:30:50.000 You know what it seems like?

00:30:59.000 And then he says, do you see tits and pussy ever?

00:31:03.000 Yeah, we just discussed that.

00:31:05.000 Not that line specifically.

00:31:07.000 Yeah, that line specifically.

00:31:10.000 Well, or maybe I'm confusing it because he keeps saying it.

00:31:13.000 What's that one say?

00:31:14.000 Like, even though I have a dick, unfortunately, I can be fully out there and change with them.

00:31:18.000 Like, I don't want them to give me any issues or things.

00:31:22.000 Yeah, that's why you're asking.

00:31:24.000 You're asking because you don't want to go to jail, dude.

00:31:26.000 That's the issue.

00:31:28.000 Anyway, disgusting vermin.

00:31:32.000 And this new, you know, in the name of tolerance, they'll accept absolutely anyone.

00:31:38.000 And when you do that, you leave yourself vulnerable.

00:31:39.000 It's sort of like Islam, where we say, refugees are welcome here.

00:31:43.000 Come on in.

00:31:44.000 I don't care who you are.

00:31:45.000 And the next thing you know, you're getting raped.

00:31:47.000 You have to have some discretion and trust your instincts, too.

00:31:51.000 When a guy named John is asking you about his maxi pads, you should be wary of him.

00:31:57.000 I noticed, by the way, in that chat, someone goes, I think he's a pedophile.

00:32:00.000 And the other girl goes, that's a very dangerous thing to accuse someone of.

00:32:03.000 You have to make sure you have proof.

00:32:06.000 I wouldn't worry about pedophiles' rights.

00:32:10.000 Your first priority is spotting them.

00:32:13.000 Speaking of which, there was a girl who was murdered recently by a young man named Brandon Clark.

00:32:20.000 I don't like focusing on the murderer, like in a mass shooting.

00:32:25.000 You know, he's doing it for fame.

00:32:26.000 But I think it's worth pointing out the murderer in this case.

00:32:29.000 And it was a beautiful young girl.

00:32:31.000 I think she was 17 in upstate New York, Utica.

00:32:35.000 Utica, yeah.

00:32:35.000 Utica.

00:32:36.000 And this guy cut her head off, like OJ style, 90% off, and then posted pictures of it that they can't get off.

00:32:46.000 Those are on 4chan right now.

00:32:49.000 And they always post gore.

00:32:50.000 You can't take down gore there.

00:32:52.000 But this guy was just a friend of hers, and the families had met each other.

00:32:56.000 And keep scrolling down.

00:32:59.000 There's pictures of him.

00:33:01.000 Oh, wait, that's her.

00:33:02.000 That's the beautiful young girl that he murdered, 17-year-old.

00:33:05.000 And there she is taking pictures of herself.

00:33:07.000 She was an e-model on Instagram, had a lot of followers.

00:33:10.000 There, he spray-painted that on the road next to her.

00:33:12.000 May you never forget me.

00:33:13.000 So he killed her.

00:33:14.000 He put her under a tarp.

00:33:15.000 And then when the police showed up, he laid on top of that same tarp and started stabbing himself in the neck so he could die with her.

00:33:23.000 Then he posted a picture of that, too.

00:33:25.000 No, he didn't.

00:33:26.000 Yeah, I just read that article.

00:33:28.000 He posted a picture of her in the tarp.

00:33:29.000 He didn't post a picture of him stabbing himself in the neck.

00:33:33.000 How would you do that?

00:33:37.000 Yeah, just like that.

00:33:38.000 I just read that article.

00:33:39.000 So the police were grabbing him as he was stabbing himself.

00:33:42.000 He's going to live and suffer.

00:33:44.000 But the moral of the story is, A, don't let your daughter be an e-model.

00:33:50.000 Don't let her post beautiful pictures of herself all over the internet where any lunatic, where some lunatic is going to fall in love with her.

00:33:58.000 It'll obviously be unrequited.

00:34:00.000 And it sucks to get dumped.

00:34:04.000 So out of a million of us who are getting dumped, there's going to be a handful that are lunatics.

00:34:11.000 And they go crazy.

00:34:13.000 So why are you casting a net out so wide where you're almost inevitably going to find that one lunatic?

00:34:19.000 No.

00:34:21.000 I mean, I understand girls want to put up pretty pictures of themselves, especially when they're in their 20s and they want to look good and they want to document it.

00:34:27.000 But to have a 17-year-old be an e-model is just asking for trouble.

00:34:30.000 Now, I want to go even more radical, and maybe it's because I'm a father of a girl.

00:34:34.000 But I would say, don't let your daughter have male friends that aren't gay.

00:34:39.000 Like, why?

00:34:40.000 Why would you have a male friend?

00:34:42.000 You're just stringing along a dude, and that's dangerous because he might be mentally ill.

00:34:49.000 When my daughter's older, I'm going to do everything I can to prevent her from having male friends.

00:34:54.000 I don't see how it's healthy.

00:34:56.000 And here's another even more radical belief.

00:34:58.000 You ready for this one?

00:35:00.000 Your daughter should not have gay friends after the age of 25.

00:35:07.000 That's a mic drop.

00:35:12.000 That is a mic drop.

00:35:13.000 Do you know why?

00:35:14.000 No.

00:35:15.000 Because fag hags tend to be spinsters.

00:35:17.000 Oh, right, right, right, right.

00:35:19.000 Because they're in an environment where sex means absolutely nothing, and they're seeing their male gay friends go home with several partners every single night two, three a day.

00:35:31.000 And so they go, I guess I should have two, three a day.

00:35:34.000 And gays don't ever have to settle down.

00:35:36.000 They just keep partying.

00:35:37.000 It's one long party till they die of old age.

00:35:39.000 So when women see that, their biological clock gets turned off, and they think, I can just be like Kevin here and party my ass off until I die of old age.

00:35:48.000 And then when they're 40, they sort of check back in with the straight world and they go, wait a minute, I became old.

00:35:55.000 Oh, no.

00:35:55.000 And the gay's like, fuck it, honey, let's go out partying.

00:35:58.000 And she's like, I don't really want to party anymore.

00:36:00.000 Yes, you do.

00:36:01.000 Come on, let's get some Coke.

00:36:02.000 Eh, Coke?

00:36:03.000 I'd love the worst hangover.

00:36:10.000 So yeah, that's my radical belief.

00:36:12.000 Radical.

00:36:14.000 He did slit his throat.

00:36:15.000 Speaking of radical, and then take a picture of it.

00:36:18.000 He did slit his throat and took a picture of it.

00:36:20.000 Yes.

00:36:20.000 He allegedly pulled out a knife, slit his own throat, and then posted a photo of his neck gushing blood on Instagram.

00:36:24.000 The police officer said, I apologize.

00:36:28.000 You were right.

00:36:28.000 Thank you.

00:36:29.000 Thank you.

00:36:30.000 I was wrong.

00:36:30.000 Feels good.

00:36:32.000 Tommy, Cassandra Fairbanks put out a video of Tommy that he released after he went to prison.

00:36:41.000 Let's play a bit of it.

00:36:45.000 So I'm in prison for the crime of journalism, for exposing Muslim paedophile rapists.

00:36:50.000 British journalists don't seem bothered about this at all.

00:36:54.000 They are puppets of corporate globalist media.

00:36:56.000 In fact, they're not even journalists.

00:36:58.000 They're activists.

00:36:59.000 They want to control the narrative and, in effect, they want to influence public opinion.

00:37:04.000 Your opinion.

00:37:05.000 Anyone that challenges that control over public opinion is a threat.

00:37:08.000 They're a danger.

00:37:10.000 I'm a threat to the British political establishment.

00:37:12.000 They haven't invested a lot of time and effort to sweep Muslim paedophile grooming gangs under the carpet to hide the reality.

00:37:19.000 They know this issue is a tinderbox, ready to ignite.

00:37:22.000 A small spark will light a fire that will rage for years to come.

00:37:26.000 Be that spark.

00:37:29.000 People have had enough.

00:37:30.000 They're angry.

00:37:31.000 And he's not calling for violence.

00:37:33.000 He's calling for attention to this.

00:37:34.000 And I've noticed the British left's answer to this is that sounds racist, that they're all Muslim Pakistani.

00:37:44.000 So their contention is no, it's actually the right wing that are pedophiles.

00:37:50.000 And I saw this disturbing thread that linked to that video where this woman lists all of the EDL.

00:37:57.000 The EDL was the English Defense League, and they started out as a pro-British group, but they started getting taken over by racists and actual white nationalists.

00:38:06.000 So Tommy said, all right, I'm out.

00:38:08.000 I can't fix this problem.

00:38:10.000 People say the same thing of Proud Boys, but that never happened.

00:38:12.000 They just said it got infiltrated by racists.

00:38:15.000 But the Proud Boys have successfully swept out the Nazis on a regular basis.

00:38:19.000 Sorry, no anti-Semites, no racists.

00:38:21.000 Bye, bye, bye.

00:38:23.000 And that's because that's not what the West is about.

00:38:27.000 The West is not about identity politics.

00:38:28.000 But anyway, I was totstrigued by this thread, by some little girl that says he's trending.

00:38:36.000 They love Dog Whistle.

00:38:38.000 Whenever they say his real name, it means I hate Tommy Robinson and I want to put his family in jeopardy.

00:38:44.000 But he says, here are some of Tommy Robinson's fellow EDL members.

00:38:49.000 Shall we?

00:38:50.000 And then she goes on to list about 10 EDL members with child sex charges.

00:38:56.000 And it's the typical one is like he convinced 13 to 16 year olds to send them naked pics and then blackmailed them.

00:39:04.000 And I started looking these up, and I realized what she's done is she's taken basically every non-Muslim child sex case or sexual, including what's it called, statutory rape, and then filtered all the right-wing ones and ignored all the liberal ones.

00:39:25.000 So she's basically listing every sex offender that could, that has anything potentially UKIP on his Facebook.

00:39:36.000 And then, of course, they're going to say they support the EDL because everyone right-wing has the EDL as one of the things they click on.

00:39:42.000 What are you going to click on?

00:39:42.000 The British National Party, UKIP, EDL, some soccer teams, Nigel Farage.

00:39:49.000 That's what they all have in common.

00:39:50.000 And then the opposite, you'd have Jeremy Corbyn, you'd have Free Palestine, you'd have a bunch of other stupid leftist socialist crap.

00:40:00.000 And that way you can make it look like the problem is everywhere.

00:40:02.000 But here's the deal, lady.

00:40:04.000 You have about 100% of all the sexual assault charges that come from the right wing, and it's about a dozen.

00:40:13.000 Tommy's talking about hundreds, entire communities dedicated, like in Rotherham.

00:40:24.000 What was Rotherham?

00:40:25.000 Was it 1,200 Rotherham sex assault cards?

00:40:28.000 An entire industry, an entire culture of getting young girls into your local shop, your corner shop, getting a picture of them, giving them candy, and then giving them a cigarette or letting them try gin or wine or something, and then saying, I'm going to tell your parents that you had a cigarette unless you let me take a picture of you.

00:40:45.000 And then I'm going to show your parents this picture, this polar art, unless you do this.

00:40:49.000 And they keep blackmailing them up the ladder.

00:40:51.000 It's a whole cultural thing until they're having sex with 12-year-old girls.

00:40:56.000 Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of them.

00:41:00.000 That's a pattern.

00:41:02.000 This thread of the EDL is really just typical of a Western society.

00:41:09.000 There's always going to be a fraction of a percent of the population that are pedophiles who need to die.

00:41:15.000 That's not what's going on with Britain and these Muslim grooming gangs.

00:41:19.000 That is not a small fraction of the population.

00:41:21.000 It's called a disproportionate number.

00:41:25.000 And in this day and age, with the death of mass, all you have to do when someone shows you a pattern is come up with a couple of examples that contradict the pattern, and then the whole thing is gone.

00:41:36.000 Well, that's not how patterns work.

00:41:38.000 Anecdotal evidence does not shatter a pattern.

00:41:40.000 It's called a disproportionate number.

00:41:42.000 Hold on, go up, go up.

00:41:43.000 1,500 victims.

00:41:44.000 1,500 victims.

00:41:45.000 One girl was sexually abused by at least 100 Muslim men.

00:41:50.000 It says Asian because they don't like saying Muslim.

00:41:53.000 Isn't that amazing?

00:41:54.000 Yeah, that's a pretty amazing now.

00:41:56.000 I've noticed it's starting to leak here.

00:41:57.000 And I noticed, I watched, what's his name?

00:41:59.000 Aziz.

00:42:00.000 Aziz Ansari.

00:42:01.000 Right.

00:42:02.000 And he, he's, business-wise, he realizes it's good for him to call himself Asian because he gets a whole other swath.

00:42:08.000 I'd like to be called Oriental.

00:42:10.000 Hey, why don't you show, did we talk about him acting like Dave Chappelle?

00:42:14.000 No, but that's cringe and great.

00:42:15.000 Can you put that up?

00:42:16.000 I could find it, yep.

00:42:17.000 I texted it to you.

00:42:18.000 Yes, you did.

00:42:20.000 Yeah, Aziz Ansari has decided that he's Chinese.

00:42:25.000 Charmie Dave Chappelle.

00:42:27.000 Hey, baby, what are you doing on the corner?

00:42:29.000 And I notice in his audience, he'll call himself Asian, and you look out into the crowd, and you will see some Koreans and Japanese in there.

00:42:36.000 It's working.

00:42:37.000 It's actually working.

00:42:39.000 But I watched his special the other day, and it's okay.

00:42:44.000 He stole a joke from Nicki Minaj.

00:42:46.000 He said, we're selling organic shoes made out of cashews.

00:42:50.000 We're calling them cashews, which is the Nikki Minaj line.

00:42:53.000 My shoe game's nuts, so they call them cashews.

00:42:55.000 See, I've got my ear to the ground with rap and R ⁇ B, so I can tell when someone's lifting something.

00:43:01.000 But he has to confront the fact that he has a Me Too moment, as East does.

00:43:06.000 Now, his Me Too moment is absurd.

00:43:10.000 It's a woman who had sex with him like five times in one night and fallated him something like half a dozen times.

00:43:19.000 And she says she was sexually assaulted.

00:43:22.000 What was all that at gunpoint?

00:43:24.000 You read the whole story, and it sounds like she had a long night of intercourse about five or six times, getting dressed, getting undressed, doing it again and again and again, all night.

00:43:37.000 And then about a week later going, I didn't like that.

00:43:39.000 I kind of felt pressured come to think of it.

00:43:42.000 That's not rape, my dear.

00:43:43.000 But of course, people don't read the whole story and they just hear he was a pig and they go, sounds reasonable.

00:43:48.000 Screw him.

00:43:48.000 So he obviously has to identify that.

00:43:51.000 And the way he identified it was to sit down on a little bench and go, it was a crazy time and I learned a lot and we've all had crazy times.

00:44:01.000 Okay, that's fair, whatever.

00:44:02.000 But the weirdest thing is he subsumed the personality of Dave Chappelle.

00:44:08.000 He just became Dave Chappelle on stage.

00:44:11.000 I don't know if he's aware that he was doing an impersonation, but it's the weirdest thing to see a comedian just change his mannerisms all of a sudden and become a dude.

00:44:20.000 Look at this.

00:44:21.000 Tell me this isn't Dave Chappelle.

00:44:27.000 He's decided the best solution is just to become Dave Chappelle.

00:44:31.000 Look at his mannerisms.

00:44:33.000 You know, I haven't said much about that whole thing, but I've talked about it on this trip.

00:44:39.000 Ahead, Bob.

00:44:40.000 Because you're here.

00:44:41.000 The cadence?

00:44:44.000 This is Dave Chappelle.

00:44:45.000 I don't know about that whole situation.

00:44:47.000 And it's a tricky thing for me to answer.

00:44:50.000 Oh my God.

00:44:51.000 He just became a different comedian.

00:44:56.000 Now, I know it's not.

00:44:57.000 I know.

00:44:58.000 Randy.

00:45:00.000 That is cringy.

00:45:02.000 It's a great impression.

00:45:02.000 Isn't it weird?

00:45:06.000 Sorry, it's Dave Chappelle.

00:45:07.000 Accidental Dave Chappelle impression.

00:45:07.000 He's a cover.

00:45:09.000 All right, let's talk to Homeless Me about a trans job fair, which is a ridiculous thing to exist, but a lot of these people got to get their numbers up because it's becoming the law now.

00:45:22.000 So they have a fair where they say, hey, dudes with fake tits and wigs, want to come work at my place so I don't get in trouble?

00:45:31.000 Let's go there now.

00:45:39.000 This is a chick.

00:45:40.000 This is a very hot chick.

00:45:42.000 I don't know what ethnicity she is.

00:45:44.000 She looks sort of Hispanic.

00:45:46.000 But what would you say that is?

00:45:47.000 Her eyes are a little wonky, but guys like that.

00:45:49.000 One thing you have to know about guys is if there's like a gap in her teeth or big ears, sometimes that is an asset and it makes her points go up.

00:45:57.000 So I would say she's a 6.9, but the eyes make her a 7.9.

00:46:02.000 I'm just throwing that out there.

00:46:03.000 this isn't a science.

00:46:04.000 Anyway, she's at the trans, Hey, Southern California, Leah Jasmine here in South Los Angeles at what is being called the largest transgender job fair ever.

00:46:18.000 Let's go inside and check it out.

00:46:21.000 It's just important that we have some place where we know that the employers that are here genuinely want to hire trans people.

00:46:27.000 So for somebody who may be new in their...

00:46:30.000 We know what's really going on here, right?

00:46:32.000 Hilton and all these big companies don't want to get in trouble.

00:46:37.000 So if the shit ever hits the fan with HR, they go, we were at the largest transgender job fair in the world.

00:46:44.000 And the other funny part is the transgender job fair is well aware of that.

00:46:50.000 So it's a racket.

00:46:51.000 And they go, yeah, Hilton, we'd love you to come to the transgender job fair.

00:46:56.000 Unless, of course, you'd like to be known as a transphobic corporation.

00:46:59.000 No, no, no, we'll be there.

00:47:00.000 We'll send a table.

00:47:00.000 We'll be there.

00:47:02.000 And HR goes, yeah, we should send a table.

00:47:04.000 This is where women come in handy in the workforce because they're the ones who send the table and manufacture the Hilton blanket that goes around the table.

00:47:11.000 And they're actually happy to be there.

00:47:12.000 Starbucks is happy to be there that day.

00:47:14.000 They got the woman with the funny hat and everyone feels really good about themselves.

00:47:17.000 It all means nothing.

00:47:18.000 It all means nothing.

00:47:20.000 If Starbucks needs someone and they get a tranny applying, they'll be like, yeah, okay, fine.

00:47:26.000 The job fair, what did the job fair do?

00:47:29.000 How many jobs came from this job fair?

00:47:31.000 It's like South by Southwest.

00:47:32.000 You know how many bands have been signed in Austin and South by Southwest?

00:47:36.000 One.

00:47:37.000 And they are called Timbuck?

00:47:38.000 Three.

00:47:39.000 But they're just one band.

00:47:41.000 This is all a fake virtue signaling waste of money and water.

00:47:48.000 Transition, you know, they're not quite like passing as a gender that they really feel internally.

00:47:55.000 So that was clearly a woman at some point, judging by the voice.

00:47:58.000 Can you imagine how freaked out her dad is?

00:48:01.000 He hasn't seen her in a few years.

00:48:03.000 And they go, before you reunite with Cassandra, you should probably know that she has a beard now.

00:48:11.000 Same voice.

00:48:12.000 She's still your sweet little angel, but she looks like a quarterback nerd now.

00:48:17.000 I don't know if you're ready for that.

00:48:19.000 I would, I mean, no matter how progressive and open-minded you are, you're going to shit a brick when that's your daughter.

00:48:26.000 No?

00:48:27.000 Hey, no, they don't have to worry.

00:48:29.000 They're not going to have somebody who's looking at you like, um, are you a man or a woman?

00:48:33.000 Or they don't have to worry about somebody who's going to say something inappropriate.

00:48:37.000 You know, I came to LA a little over a year ago.

00:48:40.000 Okay, just pause.

00:48:42.000 Is that a woman or a transiate now?

00:48:45.000 I've been around the gays a long time.

00:48:48.000 That's a gay.

00:48:50.000 Seen you.

00:48:50.000 I've seen a million gays.

00:48:51.000 And by the way, I mean, outside of the boobs, which are weird, I've hung out with this guy a billion times.

00:49:00.000 Why are we all pretending that this is just some gorgeous hot chick who's not a dude?

00:49:05.000 That's not someone's brother?

00:49:06.000 Come on.

00:49:07.000 Anyway, keep going because this part's interesting.

00:49:10.000 Been looking for work and I kind of been waiting for an opportunity like this.

00:49:14.000 And I saw this flyer about a couple weeks ago and I put on my calendar.

00:49:17.000 So I got to make it to this and see what it's about.

00:49:19.000 So yeah, we are having some conversations.

00:49:22.000 Got to make it to this.

00:49:24.000 That guy's lazy.

00:49:25.000 If it's a huge ordeal and he has to go on your calendar and he's like, come on, I need to make it to this.

00:49:30.000 I need to at least go to this one thing.

00:49:32.000 That's a lazy person.

00:49:33.000 He's probably in a relationship where some wealthy or gay guy is just like, yeah, go shopping, whatever.

00:49:38.000 And he goes, no, I want to have my own job.

00:49:40.000 I need my own life.

00:49:41.000 I'm going to put this on my calendar.

00:49:43.000 I'm going to go to it.

00:49:44.000 And then this is Thea.

00:49:46.000 This is not a gay man.

00:49:48.000 This is a woman.

00:49:50.000 I don't think they say they're a woman anymore.

00:49:53.000 But this is not a gay man with long hair and a dress.

00:49:57.000 This is something else.

00:49:59.000 We're not going to say what.

00:50:01.000 It's about identity that haven't been previously had in generations before us.

00:50:06.000 And so when you go into a hiring type situation, there is a lot of implicit bias that people bring to it that because we don't necessarily conform, maybe visually, people think that we're maybe disruptive or that we maybe won't.

00:50:19.000 How are those not gays?

00:50:21.000 If those aren't gays, then what are gays?

00:50:23.000 I wonder if there's, I haven't checked in with the gays in a while since I moved to the suburbs.

00:50:26.000 I wonder if there's some gays going, hey, can someone call us gays for once?

00:50:31.000 Like, is there a gay drought going on?

00:50:33.000 Because they talk about how there's something like 15,000 trans people in the military, which must mean every lesbian is saying I'm trans and every gay is saying I'm trans.

00:50:42.000 There must be just your classic gay and your classic lesbian going, hey, what about me?

00:50:51.000 That's me.

00:50:52.000 I'm a gay.

00:50:53.000 I'm a gay.

00:50:54.000 No, you're not.

00:50:55.000 You're a new thing.

00:50:57.000 Well, what's the matter with the old thing?

00:50:59.000 What's the matter with gays?

00:51:00.000 That should be my new trans motto.

00:51:02.000 What's the matter with gays?

00:51:05.000 Won't be able to like fit in.

00:51:06.000 And I think a lot of it is that attitude.

00:51:09.000 And trans people are actually historically economically disadvantaged.

00:51:12.000 The unemployment rate is three times the national average.

00:51:15.000 My biggest fear is that.

00:51:17.000 Why is the unemployment rate three times the national average?

00:51:20.000 Could it do with mental instability?

00:51:22.000 Could it do with a predilection to drug addiction?

00:51:26.000 Could it be due to a disproportionate number of them in the sex workers industry being prostitutes?

00:51:35.000 Could it have anything to do with that?

00:51:36.000 Or is it all prejudice?

00:51:38.000 Is everything someone else's fault?

00:51:40.000 Is there no such thing as culpability anymore?

00:51:43.000 Maybe your demographic has some problems that aren't Starbucks' fault.

00:51:49.000 Maybe your demographic has dug themselves a hole that Hilton had nothing to do with.

00:51:56.000 But Hilton needs to get me out.

00:51:58.000 Not taken seriously.

00:52:02.000 I think it's just, it comes with the territory of wanting to not necessarily be seen as like an oddity or an ab, something abnormal or something different looking.

00:52:13.000 And maybe that is.

00:52:14.000 I don't want to be seen as abnormal or different looking.

00:52:17.000 Do you have a dictionary handy?

00:52:19.000 Look up the word different.

00:52:20.000 Look up the word normal.

00:52:21.000 Normal means, and it's not necessarily good, right?

00:52:25.000 I'm pretty abnormal.

00:52:26.000 Look, I'm a homeless man.

00:52:27.000 But normal means something that is the norm, something you're used to seeing.

00:52:32.000 You are literally abnormal.

00:52:35.000 And as far as different looking, well, that's no stretch at all.

00:52:39.000 Come on.

00:52:41.000 What are they talking about, by the way?

00:52:43.000 I bet it's tedious.

00:52:45.000 That's the case, but we're still very capable people.

00:52:48.000 Our organizing teams, both with St. John's as well as TransCan Work, work to put on this phenomenon.

00:52:53.000 Okay, just pause.

00:52:54.000 What's weirder?

00:52:56.000 The guy with the deep voice and the boobs with the long hair going, I'm basically here to try to raise awareness.

00:53:03.000 And, you know, sometimes I have to write stuff in my calendar.

00:53:06.000 That's disturbing.

00:53:07.000 Or the guy who just sort of looks like a wimpy 13-year-old boy, but going, hi, my name's Jason, and we're here to show people that we're here for direction and amulets and change and wearing lots of different sweaters at the same time.

00:53:21.000 What's more disturbing?

00:53:23.000 Or sorry, screw disturbing.

00:53:25.000 What's more abnormal?

00:53:26.000 Like, what's more jarring?

00:53:27.000 And I'm not saying that it's good that you're jarred or it's normal that you're put off, but just kind of curious.

00:53:35.000 Like, say we're sitting in a bar discussing this.

00:53:37.000 I honestly don't know the answer.

00:53:38.000 What do you find more sort of, meh?

00:53:41.000 I don't know.

00:53:43.000 Over 74 employers who are looking to be inclusive of folks in.

00:53:48.000 Like, who would you be more distracted by at work?

00:53:51.000 Say you worked at a job and someone comes over and they go, yeah, I'm almost done those NFRB reports, but this one, there's a typo on the actual form itself on the PDF.

00:54:04.000 So I can't even read the last sentence.

00:54:06.000 Check that out.

00:54:07.000 That guy, that girl, that whatever, or this little man comes over and he's like, hey, we've been working on the reports and having some trouble with typos here.

00:54:17.000 Maybe there's a reason you're not getting hired.

00:54:19.000 No, that's not true.

00:54:21.000 It has to be ignorance.

00:54:24.000 Gender, non-binary, as well as gender non-conforming communities.

00:54:27.000 In addition, we've just found out that we've actually had over 500 job seekers walk through our job fair today.

00:54:35.000 Okay, just pause.

00:54:36.000 That's awesome.

00:54:38.000 How many jobs came to fruition?

00:54:40.000 The fact that 500 people showed up doesn't mean anything.

00:54:42.000 How pissed would they be, by the way, if some super hot woman showed up just applying for jobs?

00:54:48.000 And she doesn't have to say that she's, you know, used to be a man or she doesn't have to prove that she's always been a woman, but like some insanely hot chick just comes up and starts going, hi, I'm the chick from Game of Thrones.

00:55:00.000 I'd like a job at Hilton.

00:55:03.000 I think that they would be mad.

00:55:04.000 I wonder if they were sort of annoyed by her.

00:55:06.000 We noticed she didn't really seem to go into the venue.

00:55:10.000 Go ahead, Elite.com for more information.

00:55:19.000 From South LA for NBCLA.

00:55:20.000 Look at the fat one there just there for the free food.

00:55:23.000 Isn't that what all this stuff has just become?

00:55:26.000 A place to get free food.

00:55:36.000 So I want to watch some videos because we only do one at the end, one viral video.

00:55:46.000 And I wish we could do more because they pile up.

00:55:51.000 So let's do the one we were going to show at the end, the French kissing thing.

00:55:55.000 Because it's an instructional video on how to French kiss.

00:55:58.000 But I think they both get horny after they do it.

00:56:02.000 And then they're trying to talk normal.

00:56:03.000 It's the very last link.

00:56:05.000 And she's like, yeah.

00:56:06.000 So when you're French kissing, and you can see him like pretending, yes, I'm totally in control now.

00:56:11.000 I'm not, I don't have a boner.

00:56:13.000 I'm not thinking about sex.

00:56:16.000 So it's, you know, the fight face where after a fight, you think you're smiling.

00:56:19.000 You think you're going like this after a fight?

00:56:21.000 What a bitch, you just sucker punch me.

00:56:23.000 But your nerves are so intense that you go, what a bitch, you just sucker punch me.

00:56:28.000 I'm totally relaxed.

00:56:29.000 I don't even care that I was in a fight.

00:56:31.000 But go back, go back to the beginning.

00:56:32.000 Not the beginning, but just before they kiss.

00:56:34.000 No, not the beginning, beginning.

00:56:36.000 Alright.

00:56:37.000 I'll get the hint.

00:56:38.000 Hello, Michael.

00:56:39.000 Oh, oui?

00:56:40.000 Tu es mon petit chouchou?

00:56:42.000 I don't know anything.

00:56:45.000 You are my little shoo-shoo.

00:56:51.000 Kissing is weird, isn't it?

00:56:54.000 I don't, you don't French when you're married.

00:56:56.000 Huh?

00:56:56.000 I haven't Frenched in like a year.

00:57:00.000 At least.

00:57:01.000 If you smoke a little weed, it cleanses the palate, and like kissing becomes like the coolest thing in the world.

00:57:05.000 Kissing is for the youth.

00:57:07.000 Dayut.

00:57:08.000 Jut is wasted on the young.

00:57:10.000 Then they start tonguing.

00:57:11.000 Okay, look at this.

00:57:12.000 Look at this.

00:57:16.000 Wait, that's a hard cut there.

00:57:17.000 I wonder if they had to pause.

00:57:19.000 But go back to her just coming out of the kiss.

00:57:22.000 Okay.

00:57:23.000 His eyes are still glazed over.

00:57:24.000 He's like, what are we doing?

00:57:25.000 What are we doing?

00:57:26.000 So anyway, back to the show.

00:57:28.000 Turn it up.

00:57:30.000 So if you guys are wondering exactly when to introduce the tongue into the whole kissing scenario, here's my advice.

00:57:36.000 When lips meet lips, count to about four.

00:57:39.000 So one, two, three, four.

00:57:43.000 Then open your mouth and count to another four.

00:57:45.000 Young people ruined sex for themselves.

00:57:47.000 This is for losers.

00:57:48.000 Yeah.

00:57:49.000 What kind of loser watches a video on when to use your tongue when making out?

00:57:55.000 Could you imagine there's somebody out there?

00:57:57.000 One, two.

00:57:58.000 Are you counting, Derek?

00:58:00.000 What were those two I sent you?

00:58:01.000 We'll save the wheelchair guy for the very end of the show.

00:58:04.000 But what was the other one I sent you at the end?

00:58:07.000 Oh yeah, yeah, that was it.

00:58:08.000 Speaking of ICE.

00:58:08.000 The ICE.

00:58:10.000 So some woman, ICE is getting attacked now.

00:58:12.000 I don't understand it.

00:58:14.000 You don't want any immigration officers?

00:58:16.000 No other country in the world has open borders.

00:58:20.000 And if you don't have officers, you don't have borders.

00:58:22.000 And if you don't have borders, you don't have a country.

00:58:24.000 I don't understand what the hell these people want.

00:58:26.000 I'm genuinely confused.

00:58:27.000 So now ICE are just the Gestapo.

00:58:30.000 In fact, they're called stormtroopers.

00:58:31.000 I don't think they're using the Star Wars reference, although some memes have been subbing that in.

00:58:39.000 But they honestly think that they should attack and liberate all these illegal immigrants.

00:58:45.000 What about other countries?

00:58:46.000 What about Mexico?

00:58:48.000 Mexico has holding facilities.

00:58:49.000 Should they be of Guatemalans and Nicaraguans and all their illegals?

00:58:53.000 Should they be free to go?

00:58:55.000 Like, play it through.

00:58:57.000 I don't understand your utopia, how it works.

00:58:59.000 But there's a kid in a cage.

00:59:01.000 Yeah.

00:59:02.000 Someone brought a kid along on an illegal activity.

00:59:05.000 Go rob a bank.

00:59:06.000 There'll be a kid in a cage.

00:59:08.000 Go sell Coke freely in Times Square with your kids there.

00:59:12.000 And when you get busted, they got to do something with the kid until someone picks him up.

00:59:16.000 No one's there to pick him up.

00:59:18.000 So what are we supposed to do?

00:59:19.000 But anyway.

00:59:20.000 So they go to this ICE facility.

00:59:22.000 And I think it's a great example of the lunatics on the far left and their bizarre mental illness.

00:59:29.000 Look how mad this chick gets.

00:59:33.000 Wait, wait.

00:59:33.000 Pardon me?

00:59:34.000 You got to put the video.

00:59:35.000 You got to put the sound up because it's really good.

00:59:37.000 What are you doing?

00:59:38.000 Why is this so complicated?

00:59:39.000 I don't have a block.

00:59:43.000 Back up, back up, back up.

00:59:45.000 Get a flag in the troops of the reason you're able to out here.

00:59:49.000 Stop.

00:59:50.000 Who is that on the right?

00:59:54.000 Wait, is that Anthony Kumia with the Mo with a Larry wig?

00:59:58.000 Anthony Kumia and Mo from the Three Stooges had a baby and it's a woman.

01:00:04.000 What is going on with his gigantic tits?

01:00:07.000 He's got some knockers.

01:00:08.000 Like, if you want to be a woman, don't be bald.

01:00:11.000 Wear a wig or something.

01:00:13.000 You're not even trying.

01:00:14.000 What are you doing?

01:00:15.000 It must be a bummer, too, when you're a leftist protester and you have something important to say about immigration.

01:00:20.000 And then this clown shows up.

01:00:21.000 And because of your tolerance agenda, you have to say, hello, brother.

01:00:25.000 Sorry, sister.

01:00:26.000 Welcome to the revolution.

01:00:28.000 Enjoy this clown show.

01:00:29.000 He's like a cooler at a blackjack table.

01:00:32.000 Yeah, it's sort of like when there's a right-wing demonstration and some guy shows up as a keck frog with green armbands and a green cape and a Jin Keck shield and you're like, great, we're getting ridiculed.

01:00:43.000 Or that autistic kid who everyone thinks is a proud boy.

01:00:47.000 He's wearing a Patriot Prayer shirt.

01:00:48.000 He's trying to rip a plastic sign that's unrippable.

01:00:52.000 And everyone's laughing.

01:00:53.000 Haha, proud boys.

01:00:54.000 He is slow.

01:00:56.000 I've looked into this kid.

01:00:58.000 He has mental problems.

01:00:59.000 He's special.

01:01:00.000 That's why he thought he could rip plastic, but it's used against us, the entire right wing.

01:01:05.000 So we each have our crosses to bear, but that's a hell of a cross.

01:01:09.000 But the video was lagging a bit.

01:01:12.000 You have to really focus on the first two seconds.

01:01:18.000 No, now you're not getting the audio.

01:01:22.000 Go back again, Ryan.

01:01:24.000 This is dry four of you.

01:01:29.000 Can I flag in the troops?

01:01:30.000 So the reason you're able to out here is like a bandit.

01:01:33.000 You're fucking fought for Savannah.

01:01:35.000 Privileged ass!

01:01:36.000 Get the fuck out of here!

01:01:36.000 Bitch!

01:01:38.000 Now!

01:01:39.000 You're a co-brochelle.

01:01:40.000 Fuck the troops.

01:01:41.000 Youth.

01:01:42.000 I'm here at the Aurora Ice Facility where protesters decided to take it.

01:01:45.000 Again, you're zoomed in so much people can't read the text.

01:01:48.000 I want yes, there was text.

01:01:51.000 There was.

01:01:51.000 And you had it cropped out.

01:01:53.000 I want to sink a knife into your spine.

01:01:56.000 Not to kill you, but to paralyze you for life.

01:01:58.000 So you're just Stephen Hawking at the controls for the rest of your life.

01:02:02.000 I would not like that.

01:02:04.000 I would like that.

01:02:06.000 Look at him.

01:02:06.000 I have drunk.

01:02:07.000 Look at that bozo.

01:02:10.000 I don't have the right.

01:02:11.000 No matter which side we're on.

01:02:15.000 I'm going to get out of your face for what?

01:02:16.000 I have a question for you now.

01:02:18.000 Too drunk.

01:02:19.000 You are more concerned with a fucking piece of cloth than people who are locked in cages.

01:02:25.000 Children right in front of you.

01:02:28.000 You know that flag in those troops?

01:02:32.000 Back up, back up, back up, back up.

01:02:34.000 That flag in the troops are the reason you're able to out here.

01:02:38.000 I want that guy on our show regularly.

01:02:44.000 Which of the two guys?

01:02:45.000 I see two guys and three girls.

01:02:48.000 The one with the giant tits and the bald head.

01:02:52.000 I want him on our show every single day talking about the weather in Santa Barbara or wherever they are.

01:02:59.000 I'll try to get in touch with her.

01:03:02.000 Okay.

01:03:03.000 Yeah, his biggest beef is when we say her, we pause.

01:03:07.000 Look at them.

01:03:09.000 He's got like a nice sundress on.

01:03:11.000 That's oil.

01:03:15.000 Oh, we get it from different angles.

01:03:18.000 Go ahead and fuck the trip.

01:03:20.000 F the troops, huh?

01:03:22.000 So we should have no army?

01:03:23.000 Is that the deal?

01:03:25.000 We want no board.

01:03:26.000 What the hell is she doing now?

01:03:27.000 Professional stripped in.

01:03:29.000 What is going on now?

01:03:30.000 Yeah, fuck the troop, bitch.

01:03:32.000 Go ahead and fucking distribute it, bitch.

01:03:34.000 Now she's a stripper?

01:03:35.000 Then I haven't seen that.

01:03:37.000 Yeah, I hope that she goes viral.

01:03:39.000 Fuck the troops, because all they do is fucking kill people.

01:03:44.000 I think she's proud of this too, which is the saddest part.

01:03:47.000 She's not like, what did I do?

01:03:49.000 Imagine you're in Iraq and you come back and you have PTSB and some four-foot-tall bitch just goes, fuck you.

01:03:58.000 Actually, we had that in Vietnam.

01:04:00.000 They came back, they're getting spat on.

01:04:02.000 Unbelievable.

01:04:03.000 Jesus.

01:04:04.000 Okay, the last video I want to show is this coolest jet ever.

01:04:07.000 I meant to talk about this yesterday.

01:04:08.000 I cannot believe these things exist.

01:04:10.000 Iron Man is now real, and Parisians are zipping all around through the sky on a jet board.

01:04:18.000 What is this thing?

01:04:19.000 And how is this guy so good at it?

01:04:21.000 Look how fast he's going.

01:04:23.000 That'd be so dark.

01:04:24.000 Oh my God.

01:04:25.000 I would be so scared.

01:04:27.000 It looks so easy to fall.

01:04:29.000 And you're just impaled on that horse statue.

01:04:33.000 You have like a horse head going through your neck.

01:04:37.000 Look at that.

01:04:37.000 Did you have a gun?

01:04:39.000 Yes.

01:04:39.000 What the fuck?

01:04:40.000 It's a military thing.

01:04:41.000 Oh, shit.

01:04:43.000 World's funnest war.

01:04:46.000 We're dead.

01:04:47.000 I'm joining.

01:04:48.000 Fuck the troops.

01:04:49.000 I want to join the fucking air army.

01:04:53.000 You just fly over a jihadi village as they're planning to kill everyone.

01:04:57.000 Just light them up with a flame.

01:04:59.000 Imagine that, combined with a flamethrower.

01:05:01.000 What are these things?

01:05:02.000 How long have these been around?

01:05:04.000 They're satanic.

01:05:05.000 Oh, wait.

01:05:06.000 There's ones that you can have on your hands?

01:05:09.000 Like actual Stark?

01:05:13.000 to be having on your forehead when you're doing a commercial?

01:05:16.000 Maybe put some foundation on that.

01:05:18.000 This is the tightest we can go with this angle.

01:05:21.000 Look at that.

01:05:22.000 What the fuck?

01:05:23.000 That's a different thing now.

01:05:24.000 So the first thing we saw was a jet board.

01:05:26.000 That's a jet pack.

01:05:27.000 You know, I've done other things.

01:05:28.000 Some guys got a toy plane.

01:05:29.000 Congratulations.

01:05:32.000 You think that's impressive?

01:05:34.000 Check it out.

01:05:34.000 Look, I've got my foam plane.

01:05:36.000 Look what I got in my Cracker Jack box.

01:05:38.000 You ever do the Aqua Jet thing?

01:05:41.000 Like the jet pack?

01:05:42.000 Yeah, I haven't tried it yet.

01:05:43.000 I'm not impressed.

01:05:44.000 Almost drowned.

01:05:45.000 Oh, really?

01:05:46.000 It's like it turned you down and blasted you downwards?

01:05:48.000 Yeah, he just didn't give me any juice.

01:05:50.000 He didn't, so I'm just there, like, gurgling.

01:05:54.000 Oh, is it heavy?

01:05:55.000 Do you sink?

01:05:56.000 Yeah, you have a helmet.

01:05:57.000 He's in your ear.

01:05:58.000 You're naturally just kind of like a little bit, so you have to lift your head up.

01:05:58.000 You sink.

01:06:02.000 But then if he tilts the jets down, now the weight changes, so my face is just like in the fucking water.

01:06:07.000 I'm like, help!

01:06:09.000 And then he gives me like a little boost, and then the water comes up.

01:06:12.000 Oh, I don't know what happened there.

01:06:14.000 Yeah, show everyone your disgusting desktop.

01:06:18.000 The app keeps quitting on me.

01:06:20.000 That shows my face.

01:06:21.000 But I almost died.

01:06:22.000 So that's a fun.

01:06:23.000 We really chinced out on that camera.

01:06:26.000 I'm a cheap man.

01:06:27.000 When you told me we could get a new camera for, what, 50 bucks?

01:06:30.000 It's like almost 100.

01:06:31.000 Oh.

01:06:32.000 Well, it sucks.

01:06:33.000 What do you mean?

01:06:34.000 It always crashes.

01:06:35.000 Well, it's the software, to be fair.

01:06:37.000 I bet there's an update.

01:06:37.000 Okay.

01:06:39.000 All right, we're out of time.

01:06:40.000 This has been a very silly episode, but I like to break up the heavy, the crunchy with the smooth, I suppose.

01:06:48.000 That's Billy Bragg.

01:06:51.000 Let's go to the mailbag, though.

01:06:53.000 Oh.

01:06:54.000 And let's count how long it takes Ryan to figure that out.

01:06:55.000 One, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand, four, one thousand, five, one thousand, six, one thousand.

01:06:59.000 Ryan shut up you don't have a dad Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag Let me touch it.

01:07:11.000 I never noticed there's a hi-hat in there.

01:07:13.000 Oh, yeah.

01:07:14.000 Just for a millisecond.

01:07:16.000 When I had to do my version, I realized that.

01:07:18.000 I was like, let me break this track down.

01:07:20.000 When I held you.

01:07:21.000 I think I want to start taking drum lessons.

01:07:23.000 Dude.

01:07:24.000 I love that.

01:07:26.000 Is that the hi-hat?

01:07:26.000 What's that called?

01:07:27.000 The hi-hat.

01:07:28.000 Where you hit it and then you step on it?

01:07:29.000 Yep.

01:07:30.000 It's great.

01:07:32.000 You can borrow my drum pad.

01:07:36.000 It's the most fun.

01:07:37.000 Boop doop doop doop doop doop doop doop doop.

01:07:38.000 Boom.

01:07:39.000 Tss.

01:07:39.000 Boom.

01:07:40.000 Boom.

01:07:40.000 Tss.

01:07:41.000 Tss.

01:07:42.000 Not bad.

01:07:44.000 Very good, actually.

01:07:49.000 Listen, I have rhythm.

01:07:56.000 Nice.

01:07:58.000 Do you know a paradiddle?

01:07:59.000 Yeah, we'll talk about it.

01:08:01.000 Okay.

01:08:02.000 From Drew Zobel.

01:08:05.000 I've been associating with this hot girl at work for a few months now.

01:08:07.000 I think she's really cool, but she is a huge feminist.

01:08:10.000 We assume that means metaphorically.

01:08:12.000 Her politics are left-wing, but she won't call me a Nazi for liking Trump.

01:08:15.000 Her politics don't bug me, but anything...

01:08:20.000 No, I read it to myself.

01:08:22.000 But everything that happens to her is because she's a female, even though it could be anything else.

01:08:26.000 most of the time she's cool, she's been doing, she's If I say anything is girly, she hits me with that societal norms BS.

01:08:35.000 For example, she persuaded me to get a pedicure.

01:08:38.000 Yeah, I remember.

01:08:40.000 I read this to myself.

01:08:41.000 Yeah, we didn't read this yet.

01:08:42.000 This is great.

01:08:44.000 What are you, Puerto Rican?

01:08:47.000 When I lived in Williamsburg, when I was creating it from nothing and made it into the hipster mecha it is today, that was totally normal to be walking down the street in the Puerto Rican street, like South 5th, and there'd just be grown men just sitting there getting their toes did.

01:09:03.000 Yep.

01:09:04.000 And also, Dominicans and Puerto Ricans in New York, not other Hispanic groups, they get their hair cut every two days working on their fade.

01:09:13.000 And in Washington Heights, there'll be a lineup.

01:09:15.000 There'll be like two or three barbershops per block, and they all have a lineup.

01:09:18.000 And they sit there for hours, maybe three hours waiting.

01:09:23.000 I don't like waiting at the barbershop because the culture, at least for whites, has been ruined.

01:09:27.000 They have kids and women there.

01:09:29.000 You can't tell rude jokes.

01:09:30.000 You can't relax.

01:09:32.000 You can't talk about politics.

01:09:34.000 So I just use an app where I know when my barber is available and I'm there a minute before the time.

01:09:40.000 Wow.

01:09:40.000 And boom, we're done.

01:09:44.000 So first of all, Drew, you're a loser.

01:09:49.000 No one can be talked into a pedicure.

01:09:51.000 It's sort of like Islam, where they go, oh, it was hijacked by wasabi sauce, the green stuff in sushi.

01:10:00.000 And you go, how would wasabiism take over a religion?

01:10:04.000 Well, they're really radical, and they're sort of like desert people, and they got into Islam and they wrecked it and made it radical.

01:10:10.000 And you go, well, we have weirdos.

01:10:12.000 We have guys who thinks that they can fight poisonous snakes, these evangelicals in the South.

01:10:16.000 They could try to infiltrate Christianity.

01:10:18.000 And we go, no, I'm not touching a snake.

01:10:20.000 That's poisonous.

01:10:22.000 You're not magic.

01:10:23.000 That would be the end.

01:10:24.000 So why does a green gooey thing on sushi ruin your religion?

01:10:30.000 Why are you so vulnerable?

01:10:32.000 So how did she persuade you to get a pedicure?

01:10:36.000 You could talk to me for 100 years and push pedicures on me.

01:10:40.000 And I would never, ever, ever do it.

01:10:44.000 I don't even clip my toenails.

01:10:46.000 You know how I, when I'm watching TV, I'll get them with my thumbnail and just tear them off and sometimes go so low that they'll be bleeding.

01:10:53.000 That's what men do.

01:10:56.000 What are you looking up there?

01:10:57.000 Oh, I just, I don't think it's Wasabiism.

01:11:00.000 I think it's actually Wahhabism.

01:11:04.000 Nope, I'm pretty sure it's Wasabiism.

01:11:06.000 I guess Japanese people were in the Middle East at some point.

01:11:10.000 Or maybe Japanese people get Wasabi from the Middle East.

01:11:15.000 But the part of Islam that makes Wasabi is ruining Islam.

01:11:15.000 No, no.

01:11:20.000 I know what I'm talking about.

01:11:22.000 Okay, I'm sorry.

01:11:24.000 I wanted to tell her that I have a dad so that shit won't happen.

01:11:28.000 I wanted to tell her that I have A dad, so that shit won't happen, but I made it into a date for a date deal, so I disappointed my father and me and mankind and went.

01:11:28.000 What?

01:11:38.000 It is as gay as you can imagine.

01:11:40.000 She also had me reading the stupid feminist book called The Female Persuasion by Meg Wallitzer.

01:11:44.000 The book is giving me AIDS, but I'm looking at it as a test commitment, if that makes sense.

01:11:48.000 I'm thinking about how politics and relationships don't matter after a point, but is all this dumb shit worth it to be with this girl, or should I just stop?

01:11:56.000 She's great, but damn, that feminist shit is annoying.

01:11:58.000 P.S. We're both corrections officers.

01:12:01.000 Yeah, it gets fun.

01:12:02.000 What?

01:12:03.000 So imagine being at work or home and listening to the this is not just a man's job speech and acting like she's right.

01:12:10.000 Just ignore her, dude.

01:12:11.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:12:12.000 It's like we were talking about the other day where this girl was told she can't date this guy and she, the guy, no, the guy dumped her because his parents didn't approve.

01:12:12.000 Ignore her.

01:12:21.000 If my parents told me I couldn't date someone, I'd say, okay, whatever.

01:12:24.000 Bye.

01:12:25.000 Are you still dating that girl?

01:12:27.000 No.

01:12:28.000 Right.

01:12:29.000 Then go bang her an hour later.

01:12:32.000 We're done.

01:12:33.000 Yeah.

01:12:33.000 So if a girl is like, I need you to respect feminism and go, I do.

01:12:36.000 I think it's awesome.

01:12:38.000 Yeah, but don't read a book about it.

01:12:40.000 Yeah, I need you to get a pedicure.

01:12:41.000 Okay, well, oh, Jesus, look at the time.

01:12:43.000 Maybe tomorrow, something soon, soon.

01:12:46.000 I need you to read this feminist book.

01:12:46.000 You know what you could do?

01:12:47.000 Yeah, thanks.

01:12:48.000 And you take it and go.

01:12:50.000 I like to read away from you, though.

01:12:51.000 Otherwise, you get distracted because you're so beautiful.

01:12:53.000 Here, let me store this in my library.

01:12:55.000 It's on the ground and it's shaped like a garbage.

01:13:01.000 It's right on the top shelf.

01:13:04.000 But you could, if you're for the pedicure thing, you could always be like, I don't want to appropriate woman culture.

01:13:09.000 No, that's too much work.

01:13:11.000 Just say, huh, yeah.

01:13:12.000 Look, I learned all this in 1988 when I would see the coolest, toughest anarchist feminists at our anarchist workshops when we were punk rockers.

01:13:21.000 We would try to get these girls, Penny and Zoe, I think their names were.

01:13:25.000 They had dreads back before it was, anyone had dreads.

01:13:28.000 This is 1988.

01:13:29.000 And then some biker would show up, some Rachmachin biker, and she hop on the back of his motorbike and there he goes.

01:13:38.000 She wasn't interested in any of the stuff she was talking.

01:13:38.000 Damn.

01:13:41.000 It was just, it's sort of like when women go, I love bourbon.

01:13:44.000 And you go, really?

01:13:45.000 And then they have two and they're just like, I don't fucking care.

01:13:48.000 And they're going on a stop sign like they're strippers.

01:13:52.000 I thought you liked bourbon.

01:13:53.000 You had two.

01:13:55.000 All right.

01:13:56.000 James comes.

01:13:59.000 Does he?

01:14:00.000 Hey, James, how often?

01:14:03.000 James Cumbs is his name.

01:14:04.000 Pervert.

01:14:06.000 Hi, I'm James.

01:14:08.000 Oh, sorry.

01:14:09.000 Oh, uh, uh.

01:14:11.000 Stupid fucking loser name.

01:14:15.000 James Cumbs.

01:14:16.000 More like Jiz Cumbs, yeah.

01:14:18.000 Seminal.

01:14:19.000 God, what a loser.

01:14:22.000 Anyway, Ellis Island took a colossal shit on my last name.

01:14:28.000 My great-grandfather, Cosmo Camiso, came to America via Ellis Island in 1905.

01:14:33.000 He was a farmer from Calabria, Italy, who couldn't read or write in Italian little in English.

01:14:38.000 When he came to Ellis Island, poor Cosmo told the guy at the desk his name.

01:14:42.000 The man looked at him and said, nah, your name is Cosmo Cums.

01:14:49.000 It's a lot of fun.

01:14:50.000 It totally cleared out my sinuses.

01:14:52.000 Really?

01:14:52.000 Yeah.

01:14:53.000 It was like the Wahhabiism of snorts.

01:14:56.000 I know for a fact the guy at the desk did not factor in the future sexual innuendos that would be associated with the word come in the split second he decided my name.

01:15:04.000 By the way, this gentleman is talking about how I was talking on a previous show about how weird it is that at Ellis Island, just like at Animal House initiation, they would just go, no, you're not McInnis, you're Kins.

01:15:17.000 No, you're not Sophia Rosanna Sanadana.

01:15:20.000 You're Sophie Raz.

01:15:22.000 Just because it was easier.

01:15:24.000 And they just stamped it.

01:15:25.000 And no one could read or write.

01:15:26.000 So they're like, whatever.

01:15:27.000 What's in a name anyway?

01:15:28.000 I never see it.

01:15:29.000 I don't write contracts or anything.

01:15:30.000 I'm a laborer.

01:15:31.000 When you think how important your name is today.

01:15:34.000 Yeah.

01:15:36.000 The sexual connotation only entered the modern lexicon in the 1920s.

01:15:40.000 He couldn't possibly have considered the smirks and chuckles my family would endure for centuries when hearing the name read aloud.

01:15:47.000 Well, now I feel terrible.

01:15:49.000 I didn't know I was going to go there.

01:15:51.000 Wow.

01:15:53.000 Thankfully, I was not a complete.

01:15:54.000 And then he has a derogatory epithet for people who are attracted to the same sex, particularly men, in middle school and could handle the bullying.

01:16:04.000 I deserved for having a last name synonymous with ejaculating.

01:16:07.000 I earned the nickname Cums himself around age 12.

01:16:11.000 Ew, how did 12-year-olds know what that is?

01:16:14.000 While I tell people my last name is pronounced Cummiss, nobody ever pronounces it correctly, and that's okay.

01:16:20.000 Ellis Island took a colossal shit on my last name.

01:16:23.000 Keska Fuck, affect my fries.

01:16:25.000 P.S. have Brett Easton Ellis on the show.

01:16:27.000 Yeah, duh, I'd love to.

01:16:29.000 Love Jay Cumbs.

01:16:33.000 It's funny again.

01:16:39.000 Ha ha!

01:16:40.000 Your name is Cumbs.

01:16:46.000 You're different.

01:16:49.000 That thing sounds like a thing that is a sexual thing.

01:16:53.000 James Seaman?

01:16:59.000 Something implies a sexual thing, which is two people making love, which appears unusual because it doesn't happen that often.

01:17:06.000 You almost never see it outside of pornography.

01:17:08.000 So when it gets introduced in the modern lexicon, especially in someone's name, it's giggly.

01:17:16.000 Witty.

01:17:17.000 Witty.

01:17:18.000 Everyone who laughs at James Cumbs is a witty human being with a high standard of comedy.

01:17:24.000 Come.

01:17:26.000 Thank you, Jay Comez.

01:17:29.000 Let's end the show with one of the best videos I've seen in a long time.

01:17:33.000 I'm really happy with this one.

01:17:36.000 It's the wheelchair guy.

01:17:39.000 Nope.

01:17:40.000 Nope.

01:17:40.000 You're a separate link.

01:17:43.000 And you had it up.

01:17:44.000 I did.

01:17:45.000 I did.

01:17:45.000 I did close it on now, so it's one more thousand.

01:17:50.000 Got it?

01:17:50.000 Six, one, ten, one.

01:17:55.000 Those are quick thousands.

01:17:57.000 Wait a minute, stop.

01:17:58.000 There's no volume.

01:18:00.000 So go back to the beginning, please.

01:18:02.000 Again.

01:18:05.000 Yeah.

01:18:07.000 Yeah, that doesn't look hard at all.

01:18:10.000 uh oh Women in physics.

01:18:19.000 My hula hoop is stuck.

01:18:21.000 So we're just gonna put it out.

01:18:23.000 If everybody can help me out, whoa, whoa, whoa.

01:18:28.000 No, no, it's okay.

01:18:29.000 That's not how you put out a hula hoop fire.

01:18:33.000 To the rescue, wheelchairman, Rascal Man.

01:18:39.000 Okay.

01:18:40.000 Thank you.

01:18:42.000 Three.

01:18:44.000 Two.

01:18:45.000 One.

01:18:47.000 What's his superhero name, Rascal?

01:18:51.000 Yeah.

01:18:52.000 Let me see.

01:18:54.000 For now, it is.

01:18:56.000 There's got to be something that has to do with fire.

01:18:59.000 I know what's got to do with fire.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - July 16, 2019

S02E37 - ICE Bae

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