Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S03E90 - JULIA TAUSCH‘S DEAD WOMB

00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's dead on my line with Devin McDonald's.

00:00:44.000 Hi, Ryan.

00:00:45.000 Hello.

00:00:46.000 Welcome to the show called Get Off My Lawn.

00:00:49.000 It's ironic that that's the name of the show because I wouldn't want you people off my lawn.

00:00:54.000 I'd want you to come over and have a party.

00:00:58.000 What do you make of that?

00:00:59.000 I think that's very nice.

00:01:01.000 I wouldn't say, get off my lawn.

00:01:04.000 Did you hear me?

00:01:05.000 I said, get off my lawn.

00:01:08.000 I used to pile gooks like you six feet high.

00:01:11.000 I used your sandbags.

00:01:13.000 You used to pile bodies up like sandbags?

00:01:16.000 I think that was my line.

00:01:17.000 Yeah, we made a parody of that commercial.

00:01:19.000 Where is that?

00:01:20.000 I think it's right here.

00:01:22.000 We did a bunch, right?

00:01:23.000 Yep.

00:01:24.000 Whatever happened with those?

00:01:25.000 Did they ever air?

00:01:26.000 Yeah, they were on YouTube.

00:01:27.000 My friends were like, dude, you were just on YouTube.

00:01:30.000 You were just on YouTube.

00:01:32.000 We smashed a subscribe.

00:01:34.000 It was totally dope.

00:01:35.000 We just saw you on YouTube.

00:01:36.000 It's fire.

00:01:36.000 Get off my lawn.

00:01:37.000 Hey, just want you to know.

00:01:39.000 Really big fan.

00:01:40.000 I like the stuff you do.

00:01:40.000 It's really funny.

00:01:42.000 Did you hear me?

00:01:43.000 I said, get off my lawn now.

00:01:45.000 You fucking crazy man, get back in the house.

00:01:47.000 How about I blow a hole through your head and then I go back inside and I sleep like a baby.

00:01:51.000 You can count on that.

00:01:53.000 He used to stack with f ⁇ like you five feet high in Korea.

00:01:56.000 Use you like sandbags.

00:01:58.000 You were in Korea?

00:01:59.000 You were in the Korean War.

00:02:02.000 They're Hmong.

00:02:03.000 I'm Japanese.

00:02:04.000 Could be more different.

00:02:06.000 See you.

00:02:06.000 Wouldn't want to be ya.

00:02:07.000 So you do.

00:02:08.000 Remember how many takes me to do with you?

00:02:10.000 Yeah.

00:02:11.000 These are the best ones.

00:02:12.000 Acting is so easy and you're so bad at it.

00:02:16.000 I'm just too organic.

00:02:18.000 Yeah.

00:02:18.000 See our TV TV?

00:02:19.000 Let's see this.

00:02:20.000 After hours, why am I blanking on the main one?

00:02:24.000 Get off my lawn.

00:02:27.000 That wasn't so bad.

00:02:28.000 That's pretty good.

00:02:29.000 Let's see the other ones.

00:02:31.000 Okay.

00:02:32.000 Wasn't there one where I was you and you were me or I was both or you were both?

00:02:37.000 Yeah, we did a bunch of swaps.

00:02:39.000 Let's see here.

00:02:40.000 Get off my lawn to Jeremy.

00:02:42.000 Walt.

00:02:43.000 I like how that movie's been canceled now, too.

00:02:46.000 And the guy who played Ryan in the movie.

00:02:49.000 Oh, no, no, no, not in that scene.

00:02:50.000 The guy who's Clinice with Sidekick was like, yo, that movie normalized anti-Asian hate.

00:02:56.000 I'm the only person with this take that there is not a disproportionate upsurge with anti-Asian violence.

00:03:03.000 There is an overall surge of crime in American rage, and it is predominantly black.

00:03:08.000 Because crime in America is predominantly black.

00:03:12.000 For whatever reason.

00:03:14.000 But there's upwards, there's more mass shootings than ever before.

00:03:20.000 There's more subway shovings.

00:03:24.000 And getting good at shoving, if you will, than ever before.

00:03:28.000 Good at it, if you will.

00:03:30.000 Actually, that was an article way down.

00:03:35.000 What was it?

00:03:37.000 Check 3-2.

00:03:40.000 We're jumping way ahead here.

00:03:43.000 But this SmartyPants, Scott Greer type.

00:03:51.000 I can't read it.

00:03:52.000 Oh, yeah.

00:03:55.000 I still can't.

00:03:56.000 So zoom out and put it over my head.

00:03:58.000 Sorry, folks.

00:03:59.000 Our monitor is...

00:04:00.000 You've seen it.

00:04:01.000 I whipped my phone at it and it broke.

00:04:03.000 Because on St. Patty's Day, I was St. Drunkie's pants.

00:04:07.000 And I damaged some equipment.

00:04:08.000 There we go.

00:04:08.000 I published a story accurately summarizing data showing the U.S. saw the largest one-year increase in homicides since 1960.

00:04:16.000 America's murder rate has regressed by over two decades.

00:04:19.000 These facts somehow upset online leftists who wonder why their preferred candidates didn't win a lot.

00:04:25.000 Don't win a lot.

00:04:25.000 They said the chart in the story was inaccurate.

00:04:27.000 They said it was misleading.

00:04:29.000 They also said there was missing context.

00:04:32.000 A fact that was in my story.

00:04:33.000 I wonder if these people tell black families not to worry.

00:04:36.000 And then GoDanone.

00:04:39.000 Many said the story was just right-wing hysteria.

00:04:41.000 Criminologists across the political spectrum are alarmed that more people are getting shot and killed in this country.

00:04:47.000 They argue the country is going in a bad direction all the time, but you can't acknowledge homicide rates?

00:04:52.000 They being leftists.

00:04:54.000 Even if you think socialism is the answer for everything, why not acknowledge socialism would help and end the homicide crisis?

00:05:01.000 It would.

00:05:02.000 There'd be less crime and more purges.

00:05:05.000 I don't think there's a lot of crime during the Great Leap Forward.

00:05:08.000 And China today almost has no people in prison.

00:05:12.000 All they do is kill them.

00:05:14.000 Last thing, personally, I was an online left-wing personality.

00:05:18.000 No, if I was an online left-wing personality, I would blame the spike in homicide on neoliberalism instead of pretending it doesn't exist out of fake solidarity with black families disproportionately hurt by gun violence.

00:05:30.000 Anyway, sorry.

00:05:32.000 We're jumping ahead here.

00:05:33.000 The opening song was, of course, Nate Noface.

00:05:38.000 Now, Nate Noface was in a band called, jump to the end of this, Crime Kills, all one word with a Z, 1-5.

00:05:48.000 They had a lot of great jams.

00:05:50.000 And they would use 8-bit video game music, which I've only ever seen in Britain.

00:05:56.000 And it was like this Chicano kind of vibe.

00:05:58.000 It's a kid from Arizona.

00:05:59.000 There he is there.

00:06:01.000 Eight years ago.

00:06:09.000 My best friend got sentient in prison because of some bitch.

00:06:17.000 I don't feel the fucking girl.

00:06:22.000 Fuck the woman.

00:06:27.000 We picked video games and like suicidal tendencies shit.

00:06:30.000 Remember, there's two ways that you show videos here, and this is the better of the two ways.

00:06:35.000 Go back to the other way.

00:06:37.000 This way is sucking, and you don't do any homework, so we're still lagging here.

00:06:43.000 And the readers are getting angry.

00:06:53.000 Oh, this is the actual look at my screen.

00:06:56.000 No, I wasn't being sarcastic.

00:06:58.000 Oh, okay.

00:06:59.000 I mean, I, yeah.

00:07:02.000 Or check out this band, this song, 1-4, kill the promoter, starring Bud Bundy of Married with Children.

00:07:12.000 What?

00:07:15.000 Yeah, I hold on to fucking drink tickets.

00:07:23.000 It's a cool idea for a hat, a St. Ides hat.

00:07:32.000 Couldn't wear it with a 50-year-old, though.

00:07:38.000 They're like malt liquor?

00:07:40.000 Yeah.

00:07:40.000 Nice cube.

00:07:42.000 There he is.

00:07:45.000 That's Ted Bundy's son.

00:07:47.000 No, not Ted Bundy.

00:07:48.000 L. Bundy.

00:07:51.000 Yeah, it is.

00:07:53.000 Bud Bundy.

00:07:54.000 He's like the Bart Simpson of live-action sitcoms.

00:07:57.000 Anyway, so that band was, you know, a bunch of fucked up drunk hipsters and they broke up.

00:08:01.000 And this guy has become like an old Chicano.

00:08:05.000 And he still wants to make synth punk.

00:08:08.000 And he's really good at it.

00:08:27.000 Boy, Mexicans sure can't grow good mustaches, huh?

00:08:36.000 Okay, that's a good one.

00:08:36.000 So that's the opening song we heard.

00:08:38.000 And then they have a song Never Done Dying, which is again Nate No Face.

00:08:42.000 He was the singer of Crime Kills.

00:08:45.000 Crime Kills is long gone.

00:08:49.000 But this is 1-3 I'm talking about.

00:08:50.000 I can't behave.

00:08:53.000 God, you're peering.

00:08:54.000 Make the font bigger if it's so hard for you to see.

00:09:01.000 So I guess he gets like guest DJs and then he sings over top of it.

00:09:05.000 This is DJ Top Gum's one particular hit.

00:09:17.000 I could see this being big in Britain.

00:09:19.000 You know what he should do?

00:09:21.000 He should get a band together or at least one other guy who can make the music and go to Britain and become big there.

00:09:27.000 Worked for Jimi Hendrix, worked for the Strokes, worked for Andrew WK.

00:09:33.000 That's what I'd do if I was still a young man and interested in bands getting big.

00:09:41.000 Oh my god, he would be so big in Britain.

00:09:43.000 It sounds like that Britain dub stuff.

00:09:45.000 They love that drum and bass shit.

00:09:49.000 1-3.

00:09:51.000 Was that I Can't Behave?

00:09:52.000 Yep.

00:09:52.000 Yeah, so have we heard everything?

00:09:54.000 Yeah.

00:09:54.000 Now, I was going to play my daughter's recommendation, Hello Mary.

00:09:57.000 We didn't see this one.

00:09:58.000 Wait, what's this one now?

00:10:00.000 Never Done Dying?

00:10:07.000 Oh, that's Crime Kills.

00:10:08.000 That's the old band.

00:10:11.000 Is it?

00:10:12.000 No, no, this is Nate Noface.

00:10:13.000 Sorry.

00:10:26.000 Yeah, he should totally ramp up the Chicano shit, like with a bandana.

00:10:30.000 Look like Suicidal Tendencies vibes.

00:10:34.000 Super Chicano, dude.

00:10:35.000 The other guy should dress like a Chicano, too, even if he's not.

00:10:38.000 And the shirt buttoned up all the way.

00:10:40.000 You'd be a little out of date, too.

00:10:42.000 Vans and all that stuff.

00:10:44.000 And then go and just live in Britain, squat at someone's house, get signed by Rough Trade, and be fucking huge.

00:10:53.000 Gigaron Prr.

00:10:55.000 But yeah, Hello Mary was the other band I was trying to find yesterday.

00:10:59.000 I was looking up Hail Mary.

00:11:01.000 That's my daughter's recommendation.

00:11:04.000 1-7 Ginger is their song.

00:11:07.000 They're locals.

00:11:08.000 They go to LaGuardia High School.

00:11:09.000 And I love to see my daughter into stuff like this.

00:11:11.000 It seems so clean and like so not Cardi B. Talking about WAP.

00:11:43.000 Pretty good, huh?

00:11:46.000 What's 1-6?

00:11:47.000 You can sort of see what the band's like.

00:11:49.000 I find it heartening to see young girls into this kind of stuff.

00:11:54.000 Not being whores, just hanging around, being fun, getting into grunge, making music, being creative.

00:12:05.000 And then they're empowered, but it's not a dogmatic feminist way that pisses you off.

00:12:10.000 You don't need your masculine.

00:12:16.000 All right, that's enough.

00:12:18.000 It's enough rock talk.

00:12:20.000 So I told you that I think I got Bob and David, or at least Bob Odenkirk, to do a song mocking Toby Keith, and I did it by accident.

00:12:30.000 I was sincerely liking the song, and they both assumed I was sarcastic.

00:12:33.000 And I said, I can't find it anywhere.

00:12:36.000 Some dummy goes, this took me like two seconds to Google.

00:12:40.000 You know what he pulled up?

00:12:42.000 He pulled up the song we used that we said, we can't find it, but here's another country song they did.

00:12:48.000 How do you watch the show buttons?

00:12:49.000 It's clear, yeah.

00:12:50.000 Maybe he skips the intro.

00:12:52.000 I don't know.

00:12:53.000 But no, but I said, see, that song isn't what I was looking for, but it's from around the same, or it's from a little bit later than that.

00:13:00.000 So it couldn't have been on Mr. Show because Toby Keith 9-11 was post-Mr.

00:13:04.000 Show.

00:13:05.000 Mr. Show ended in the, I think, 98, maybe even 97.

00:13:09.000 But anyway, someone sent this, and I think this might be it.

00:13:12.000 And by the way, talking about the sprinkles, Bob Odenkirk, you can tell is just talking out of his ass.

00:13:18.000 And this is just such insane top quality from top to bottom.

00:13:25.000 You know, they said my first words coming out of my mother's womb were America the beautiful.

00:13:34.000 My name is C.S. Lewis Jr.

00:13:37.000 I'm a famous country singer.

00:13:39.000 I was born in a holler.

00:13:41.000 And I came out of my mother in the holler.

00:13:44.000 And I was hollering.

00:13:47.000 That's a little joke.

00:13:50.000 Dear me.

00:13:51.000 Pussy from Vegas.

00:13:53.000 Boots on my feet.

00:13:57.000 Sometimes I write a word to start a song like the word eagle.

00:14:03.000 Eagles are bald, and so am I. If you're from Europe, you can suck my dick.

00:14:14.000 I want you to think about something, alright?

00:14:17.000 When the astronauts, right?

00:14:20.000 When the astronauts got back from the moon, what did they say, man?

00:14:24.000 What did they say?

00:14:25.000 They said, it's good to be back in America.

00:14:29.000 And them motherfuckers had gone to the goddamn moon.

00:14:33.000 I believe the president is doing the right thing.

00:14:37.000 Whatever he's doing, I'm not real sure what it is.

00:14:40.000 I don't keep track of things too closely.

00:14:43.000 You know, if there were any goddamn moon people, you know they'd be trying to sneak across the border.

00:14:49.000 Only they'd probably burn up from whatever fire comes at you when you're going through space.

00:14:57.000 Call yourself an American.

00:14:59.000 So he's got a...

00:15:00.000 Wait, is it the 25th?

00:15:02.000 Today?

00:15:03.000 Yeah, I think he's on a movie out today.

00:15:05.000 Oh, that's right.

00:15:06.000 Yeah, we want to go see him.

00:15:07.000 Nobody.

00:15:08.000 What?

00:15:08.000 Yep, yeah, yep.

00:15:10.000 What are you saying?

00:15:11.000 We want to go see it?

00:15:12.000 Yeah, we're going to double date Hollowed and Our Girls.

00:15:15.000 Oh, cool.

00:15:15.000 Going to go see a movie.

00:15:17.000 Hold on.

00:15:17.000 Let me just check my phone here.

00:15:19.000 Usually your texts come through to me.

00:15:23.000 Ryan.

00:15:25.000 You're not looking for Ryan.

00:15:26.000 Ryan Rivera.

00:15:28.000 I see something about Proud Boys.

00:15:30.000 There's me telling you what to do.

00:15:32.000 There's a sandwich you made.

00:15:34.000 That's Tuesday now.

00:15:35.000 Yes.

00:15:36.000 Inside an all-black militia group.

00:15:39.000 Are you looking for a couple memes?

00:15:42.000 I don't see any invites.

00:15:44.000 Right.

00:15:44.000 Fantasy Man by Tony Laquetta.

00:15:48.000 There's...

00:15:49.000 I just figured that.

00:15:52.000 You know what it is?

00:15:53.000 I probably broke my phone when I whipped it at the TV.

00:15:56.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:15:56.000 Your text fell out.

00:15:58.000 You know, because I delete the texts that don't get sent.

00:16:04.000 There's probably little digital letters all over the floor here.

00:16:07.000 Could be.

00:16:08.000 Could be.

00:16:09.000 Let's see the trailer for Bob Odenkirk's action movie.

00:16:12.000 Whole new career, maybe.

00:16:13.000 This guy has the sprinkles.

00:16:15.000 I've hung out with him a few times.

00:16:16.000 He just, like, one time we were in New Orleans, and there was a vampire, and he had the teeth, and they looked real, and he had the cloak, and he was posing for pictures, and he was a young guy, and you could tell that he wasn't embarrassed by this.

00:16:30.000 He thought he was like being a cool vampire, like not the obvious one.

00:16:34.000 So he was like, oh.

00:16:36.000 And then Bob Onenkirk goes up to me and goes, sorry, I just got to ask.

00:16:41.000 Are you an actual vampire or are you a guy dressed up as a vampire just posing for pictures?

00:16:46.000 And he goes, hmm, wouldn't you like to know?

00:16:50.000 And then Bob goes, oh, that's exactly what you'd say if you're a real vampire.

00:16:54.000 Oh, my God, I get it.

00:16:55.000 Oh, wow.

00:16:57.000 He seems great.

00:17:00.000 Or at David's, I saw him, they were passing around a bottle of whiskey at David Cross's wedding.

00:17:04.000 And I saw him chug it.

00:17:05.000 And I go, Bob, I've never seen you drink before.

00:17:07.000 You don't really drink.

00:17:08.000 Because you were just like, something about your dad.

00:17:10.000 And he was like, yep, my dad loved to drink, and I didn't love him.

00:17:22.000 That's not as funny as the other one.

00:17:23.000 It should have gone out in the high note.

00:17:24.000 It's okay.

00:17:29.000 So they took maybe 20 bucks in an old watch?

00:17:33.000 Mr. Matt, Matt, Matt.

00:17:35.000 Did you even take a swing?

00:17:36.000 No.

00:17:37.000 Could have taken her, Dad.

00:17:41.000 Heard you had some excitement last night.

00:17:43.000 I wish they'd have picked my place, you know?

00:17:48.000 Why didn't you take them out?

00:17:50.000 I was just trying to keep the damage to a minimum.

00:17:55.000 How's that working out for you?

00:17:58.000 Okay.

00:17:59.000 Let me just explain something to you, women and non-fathers out there.

00:18:04.000 As fathers, we are consumed with protecting our family.

00:18:08.000 And it's not something that comes up that much, but it's a genetic caveman trait that's just in our bones.

00:18:15.000 And it's all we think about sometimes.

00:18:18.000 This is why we love action movies, because our biggest fear is that we'll pussy out if something goes down.

00:18:23.000 We think about it constantly.

00:18:25.000 And that's why we have guns in the house.

00:18:26.000 That's why we have machetes and baseball bats and all these plans.

00:18:30.000 But it's why we love action movies because we don't know if it doesn't happen.

00:18:35.000 We all talk about how we would handle it, but we don't know.

00:18:38.000 How many fictional fights do you have in your head when you come down here?

00:18:41.000 Oh my God.

00:18:42.000 When I come down here?

00:18:43.000 What's the problem?

00:18:43.000 What's the city thing about beating you?

00:18:45.000 Not Midtown proper, but just the city at all.

00:18:47.000 Oh, you mean like someone coming up to me on the subway?

00:18:49.000 Yeah, subway.

00:18:50.000 Oh, yeah.

00:18:50.000 That's another thing I play it all the time.

00:18:51.000 Like some like four black teenagers punch some 13-year-old girl in the face.

00:18:57.000 And now I'm like, oh, great.

00:18:58.000 And they have a knife.

00:19:00.000 Now what do I do?

00:19:01.000 Right.

00:19:01.000 Die fighting them or hate myself for the rest of my life for not defending that girl.

00:19:06.000 It's the worst.

00:19:07.000 Lose, lose.

00:19:07.000 I've thought, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:19:09.000 And my girlfriend lives a little lower on the island.

00:19:16.000 And she has to take the subway sometimes.

00:19:18.000 So not being there stinks too.

00:19:20.000 Because now you're just, you got no control over that.

00:19:23.000 Like, if I'm there, I could at least jump in the guy's face and get stabbed for it.

00:19:26.000 You don't have to fight him.

00:19:27.000 It's something you got to do.

00:19:28.000 Oh, yeah, definitely.

00:19:29.000 But you know, this is kind of like the Avalanche movie.

00:19:33.000 Yes, it is.

00:19:35.000 What was that movie called again?

00:19:36.000 I don't remember.

00:19:37.000 Tour de Force or some shit?

00:19:39.000 Forge Majeur.

00:19:40.000 Yep.

00:19:42.000 Look okay.

00:19:46.000 That's your knuckles destroyed.

00:19:47.000 I don't think the writer's ever punched a brick wall before, but your hands are out of commission now for about six months.

00:19:52.000 You better hope he doesn't come back until then.

00:19:54.000 Yeah, you're wearing giant white oven mitts for six months now.

00:20:06.000 There we go.

00:20:06.000 That's the thing I was just talking about.

00:20:08.000 Doing here, old man.

00:20:14.000 I'm gonna fuck you up.

00:20:32.000 It's been a hell of a day.

00:20:34.000 You can see that.

00:20:37.000 For 12 years, I worked for some very dangerous people.

00:20:42.000 Oh, did he?

00:20:45.000 Alright, stop, stop, stop.

00:20:48.000 I thought it was a guy who just trained himself because he felt so bad.

00:20:50.000 Wait, are we one billionth of the way into the trailer?

00:20:53.000 No, no, no, no, no.

00:20:54.000 We're on this screen there.

00:20:55.000 This one lags a lot less.

00:20:57.000 What was that on your main screen?

00:20:59.000 Oh, I was loading up the trailer here, but then I was like, this one plays better.

00:21:03.000 How long is the trailer?

00:21:04.000 Oh, we're halfway through it.

00:21:05.000 Yeah, yeah, but three minutes.

00:21:06.000 That's way too long.

00:21:07.000 Oh, so it's...

00:21:08.000 I like those kind of movies, too.

00:21:09.000 They're just less relatable.

00:21:10.000 My favorite kind of movies, though, is when the guy, like I've talked about this a million times, when Russell Crowe has to bust his wife out of prison, and he's not a ninja, and he does it the way you and I would do it, where he fucks up and he gets beat up, getting to know criminals, and he pays all this money, and he gets robbed.

00:21:26.000 But eventually, he figures out how to bust his fucking wife out of prison, which is so cool.

00:21:33.000 What's that movie called?

00:21:34.000 The Next Three Days?

00:21:35.000 The Next Three Days.

00:21:36.000 With Liam Nissan, too?

00:21:37.000 Yeah.

00:21:37.000 Oh, cool.

00:21:38.000 Yeah.

00:21:39.000 Seems good.

00:21:39.000 There's another Nissan movie out, too.

00:21:41.000 Marksman or something.

00:21:42.000 No way.

00:21:43.000 Yeah.

00:21:43.000 That's pretty cool.

00:21:44.000 That looks cool.

00:21:46.000 Jason Statham and Liam Nissan are my top guys.

00:21:53.000 The Marksman, yeah.

00:21:54.000 I call him Liam Nissan because when my wife was in college, she was with this black power mulatto roommate that hated white people and had like black fists everywhere.

00:22:04.000 And my wife kept catching her watching Liam Neeson movies.

00:22:08.000 And she'd go, oh, I couldn't help but notice you were enjoying a certain white person.

00:22:12.000 And she'd go like, who?

00:22:13.000 That?

00:22:14.000 That Liam Nisan?

00:22:16.000 I don't know who that is.

00:22:19.000 So that's been a running joke our entire marriage.

00:22:21.000 Every time we see him, we call him Liam Nisan to make him sound more ethnic.

00:22:25.000 Yeah, that's awesome.

00:22:27.000 Meanwhile, not trying to make him sound more ethnic.

00:22:29.000 She was pretending she'd never heard of him before and didn't know how to pronounce his name.

00:22:32.000 It's even better.

00:22:33.000 Detective Shitty.

00:22:35.000 He used to go around beating black people up, right?

00:22:38.000 Because his wife was assaulted.

00:22:39.000 So he's like, I would go around looking for blacks.

00:22:41.000 Oh, I forgot about that.

00:22:43.000 The whole world has forgotten about that.

00:22:45.000 I haven't.

00:22:47.000 Is this out today?

00:22:49.000 Let's see.

00:22:51.000 December 3rd, 2020.

00:22:52.000 It's in theaters.

00:22:54.000 January 22nd, 2021 release date, but everything's been COVID, so he probably could have bought this at your house.

00:23:01.000 So it came out a month ago.

00:23:03.000 Oh, so it might be on on-demand by now.

00:23:05.000 It sure is.

00:23:06.000 You're going to want that movie theater experience.

00:23:10.000 I just need a little time to sort things out.

00:23:12.000 I just need a little time to sort things out.

00:23:13.000 Is he trying to be American?

00:23:15.000 Yeah, but he doesn't try too hard.

00:23:18.000 So you just go, oh, I guess you're an Irish guy who's lived here for 40 years, which I guess he is.

00:23:22.000 That's fair.

00:23:27.000 He was great in my favorite Woody Allen movie, Husbands and Wives.

00:23:30.000 Let's not get ugly.

00:23:33.000 Husbands and Wives, you have to see.

00:23:38.000 You don't have to call Border Patrol.

00:23:39.000 You could have just hit the gas.

00:23:42.000 I was in the Marine Corps, so I suggested...

00:23:44.000 I was in the Marine Corps.

00:23:46.000 Y'all turn around and add it.

00:23:48.000 I'm a soldier too.

00:23:49.000 My orders are to take them back with me.

00:23:58.000 Well, I'm not sure I'm too thrilled with the general message, which is take them all in.

00:24:03.000 This is like Chris Hayes yesterday, right?

00:24:05.000 Where he said, the coverage of the border just furthers the myth that we should just keep them over there and let them deal with their own problems.

00:24:14.000 I got to look up that exact quote.

00:24:17.000 We should have done the whole show on that fucking tweet.

00:24:22.000 It's one of the weirdest things I've ever read.

00:24:25.000 I sent it to Kumi and he's like, what's his point here?

00:24:28.000 What's his message?

00:24:30.000 Because it's such a weird thing.

00:24:32.000 Much of the border coverage serves as a kind of retroactive endorsement of the Trump policy of functionally closing the border and allowing all of the same harms to transpire just out of view and on someone else's soil.

00:24:47.000 Again, it's a brutal run-on sentence.

00:24:50.000 Much of the border coverage, it serves as a retroactive endorsement of what Trump was doing, which was closing the border and allowing all of the same harms to transpire.

00:25:00.000 Allowing all of you not opening the borders, you're allowing harms to transpire in other countries.

00:25:09.000 Correct.

00:25:10.000 I am presently, right now, I am allowing harms to transpire in Germany.

00:25:16.000 I am currently, as you're looking at me right now with those gorgeous peepers of yours, I am allowing harm to transpire in the entire continent of Africa from top to bottom.

00:25:28.000 I am letting it happen.

00:25:31.000 What the fuck am I?

00:25:33.000 An army of supermans?

00:25:35.000 Am I 100,000 supermen?

00:25:38.000 What do you, like God?

00:25:40.000 God is the only person who is culpable for allowing harm to transpire.

00:25:47.000 And he's got a great argument for that.

00:25:51.000 What the fuck?

00:25:54.000 Somebody, I remember seeing the thing where it said the border being opened, like Biden's policies about the borders, like a national security threat?

00:26:02.000 And there's some, I mean, nothing ever happens from this, but it said an investigation is opening.

00:26:06.000 I remember back when I sang with liberals, they would say, What was her name?

00:26:09.000 Aviva Yale.

00:26:10.000 She said, But Gavin, with stricter borders, they're just going to get madder at us, and that's going to make them want to attack us.

00:26:18.000 Okay, so why don't you just start fucking random dudes late at night so they don't rape you?

00:26:24.000 Smart.

00:26:26.000 Today's book is Michael Borde's Even a Daughter is Better Than Nothing.

00:26:31.000 This is possibly the weirdest book I've ever read, and it's not that weird as far as the writing goes, but he just Michael Bord is this weird bisexual from back when no one was bisexual.

00:26:40.000 He used to write for the punk magazine Maximum Rock and Roll, old Jewish guy.

00:26:47.000 And he blew my mind as a young kid when I was a teenager reading a maximum rock and roll because he would say shit that was so politically incorrect way back then when no one was doing it.

00:26:56.000 I'm talking about early 90s.

00:26:58.000 And one time he said to me, or said to me, one of his columns spoke to me and it said, rape is just assault in your genitals.

00:27:09.000 And it's the stigma of sexuality that makes it so bad.

00:27:14.000 And I was like, wow, I never thought of that before.

00:27:17.000 If we had an open, more sexual society, that would just be a different type of assault.

00:27:20.000 It would be assault.

00:27:22.000 So that's not true, by the way.

00:27:24.000 But it's a cool take and it's interesting.

00:27:26.000 I'll give you that.

00:27:28.000 That's true.

00:27:29.000 And then he goes, by the way, we got Josh Denny coming by the studio this weekend.

00:27:35.000 Maybe we should watch some of these movies with him.

00:27:37.000 I wonder if that's allowed.

00:27:38.000 But anyway, I said it to my dad.

00:27:42.000 I go, you know, dude, that's when you're, I must have been 18, so this would be 1988.

00:27:47.000 And I said, you know, dad, rape is just assault, but in your genitals.

00:27:53.000 And if we didn't have the sexual stigma, then it would just be treated the same as assault.

00:27:58.000 And he was like, he was so smart.

00:28:00.000 He was walking by me at the time.

00:28:02.000 And he just goes, do us a favor, go and get raped and then get the shit beaten out of you and then come by and tell me what's worse.

00:28:10.000 And I was like, yeah, probably would be a lot worse, no matter what the stigma is.

00:28:14.000 But this is nothing to do with that.

00:28:16.000 This is about Mongolian culture.

00:28:18.000 He goes to the fucking top of China and just writes about it up there and the people and the gross food they eat and how nothing works up there and they're obviously misogynist attitudes.

00:28:28.000 It's very machismo over there.

00:28:31.000 But hearing him struggle to get around Mongolia on no money is just a fascinating.

00:28:37.000 It's one of the best travel books I've ever read.

00:28:40.000 Definitely worth checking out.

00:28:43.000 Mongolia.

00:28:44.000 What a weirdo.

00:28:47.000 This tweet here.

00:28:48.000 U.S. government accountability office says they had launched investigation of President Biden.

00:28:51.000 He may have broken law by halting construction of border wall.

00:28:54.000 Oh, yeah, I heard about that.

00:28:55.000 But nothing comes of that ever, right?

00:28:56.000 Nothing.

00:28:57.000 That's the thing.

00:28:58.000 Nothing's come of this.

00:28:59.000 Cuomo.

00:29:01.000 This is Cuomo using his power to get the Cuomo family.

00:29:05.000 What's it called?

00:29:06.000 It's called a jab, right?

00:29:08.000 Did you get the jab?

00:29:08.000 I got the jab.

00:29:09.000 Last night we were talking about the jab.

00:29:11.000 They went and got the jab.

00:29:13.000 I don't care.

00:29:16.000 Oh, here's a fun article about Orlando Bloom.

00:29:23.000 Here's my typical day.

00:29:25.000 I wake up at 6.30.

00:29:27.000 I check my app.

00:29:28.000 I have a sleeping app.

00:29:29.000 And I check to see if I slept well.

00:29:31.000 I did sleep well last night, even though I have a newborn baby named Daisy.

00:29:35.000 I go into her room.

00:29:36.000 I look at her.

00:29:37.000 We gaze into each other's eyes.

00:29:38.000 She's already awake, I guess.

00:29:40.000 And then I like to earn my breakfast, so I'll just have some green powder and some organic brain oils.

00:29:46.000 And then I'll go on a hike up a mountain, think about life.

00:29:51.000 I have a deal with Amazon right now where I come up with characters for myself, but then I spend half the time thinking about characters for visible minorities and women because I want to be part of the conversation, and I think they deserve so much more as far as roles go.

00:30:07.000 Then I do a bunch of other shit.

00:30:09.000 Oh, wait a minute.

00:30:09.000 I'm not talking about me.

00:30:11.000 I'm talking about Orlando Bloom, who told the Sunday Times what a typical day is.

00:30:16.000 Now, anyone who has a baby knows you don't have a sleeping app when you have a newborn, you don't have a sleep.

00:30:22.000 You don't sleep.

00:30:23.000 But this is a guy who was married to Miranda Kerr.

00:30:27.000 The ironically named Miranda Kerr.

00:30:31.000 I'm her first child named Don't.

00:30:35.000 No, and I don't care.

00:30:40.000 But this is always the same case with these fucking shitbags.

00:30:45.000 He was, this is 2-1.

00:30:47.000 He was married to her in 2011, and he divorced about a year later.

00:30:53.000 I'm bored.

00:30:54.000 This is, by the way, with a nanny and an au pair and a maid.

00:30:58.000 So you walked out on a one-year-old?

00:31:01.000 Could you be a bigger cunt, please?

00:31:04.000 Walking out on a one-year-old.

00:31:05.000 And I've seen this in my own life around me, people I know tangentially, and I just, it makes me sick.

00:31:12.000 It makes me nauseous when someone is divorced with a one-year-old.

00:31:16.000 You couldn't fuck...

00:31:17.000 People move to shitholes like China for work and they live there for a year just because they have to.

00:31:23.000 People go to worse shitholes for work like Afghanistan and get shot at.

00:31:28.000 You can't be uncomfortable with your supermodel for a year.

00:31:32.000 I mean, he's just human garbage.

00:31:34.000 He's a fucking loser-vapid piece of shit.

00:31:39.000 Anyway, that was proven recently when he was asked by the Independent.

00:31:43.000 No, sorry, the Sunday Times to talk about his typical day.

00:31:48.000 And I love, one great thing about social media and this sort of transparency of celebrity is we're really peeling back the curtain and realizing how completely useless these attractive people are.

00:31:59.000 I'm not denying that they're pretty.

00:32:02.000 They are pretty.

00:32:04.000 But that's about it.

00:32:05.000 Sometimes I look at a cow and think, that's the most beautiful thing ever.

00:32:11.000 I hope he's not talking about Katy Perry.

00:32:13.000 She did put on a bit of weight.

00:32:14.000 She did.

00:32:15.000 Again, Katy Perry, I feel nothing.

00:32:19.000 But scroll up to the tweet or down to the tweet.

00:32:22.000 I may have missed some details.

00:32:25.000 Oh, he finally earns his breakfast by 9 a.m.

00:32:28.000 And that's usually porridge with some Hazelnut milk, cinnamon vanilla paste, hazelnuts, goji berries, a vegan protein powder, and a cup of PG tips, which is tea.

00:32:39.000 I'm 90% plant-based, so I'll only eat a really good piece of red meat, maybe once a month.

00:32:44.000 I sometimes look at a cow, that's the cow one.

00:32:46.000 Then he showers and gets dressed.

00:32:48.000 I guess he was nude this whole time.

00:32:51.000 I like to make an effort, no tracksuit bottoms.

00:32:53.000 I have a deal with Amazon.

00:32:54.000 That's what I told you about.

00:32:57.000 I had this remarkable opening chapter to my career for which I was only semi-present.

00:33:02.000 Without my Buddhist practice, I could have easily come off the rails.

00:33:05.000 Now, anyone with a newborn knows that that's all you have to talk about.

00:33:10.000 Your baby sleeping through the night.

00:33:11.000 Is she teething?

00:33:12.000 She's colicky.

00:33:14.000 That's all you talk about when you have a newborn.

00:33:16.000 He doesn't mention the newborn once, and when you go through his day, which I was boring enough to do, he stares into her eyes.

00:33:22.000 He doesn't see her till 8.30 p.m.

00:33:25.000 What?

00:33:26.000 Which is past the baby's bedtime, depending on what their schedule is that early in the game.

00:33:31.000 What a fucking loser.

00:33:34.000 I think if you take care of a plant at that frequency, it'll die.

00:33:38.000 Yeah.

00:33:40.000 I think most people do stare into their plant's eyes about that much.

00:33:45.000 They wake up, maybe they're making coffee, and they look at it, check it.

00:33:48.000 Oh, it's coming along.

00:33:48.000 Oh, the soil's a little dry.

00:33:50.000 It's on the windowsill.

00:33:51.000 And then at night, when they're just loading the dishwasher, they look at it maybe one more time.

00:33:56.000 So he's got a green thumb when it comes to babies.

00:34:01.000 I spend a lot of time dreaming about roles for myself and for minorities and women.

00:34:05.000 I'm trying to be a voice for everybody.

00:34:07.000 Well, you're definitely a voice for fucking turds everywhere.

00:34:11.000 Speaking of turds, Brian Spencer just did some wonderful watercolors we're going to make into shirts.

00:34:16.000 Assuming that's okay with him.

00:34:18.000 We're sponsoring that baseball team, and I'm going to give them the, I send it as a separate email.

00:34:23.000 I'm going to give them that the Budweiser one where you're a bud.

00:34:27.000 I showed it to my wife, and she goes, she goes, maybe she was getting a little drunk.

00:34:31.000 She goes, oh, my God, he's a little can of Budweiser.

00:34:36.000 Yeah.

00:34:36.000 She's right.

00:34:37.000 You're very perceptive, dear.

00:34:44.000 Your eyes are like startling.

00:34:46.000 It's like I'm looking at a Gavin.

00:34:48.000 This one's bananas, too.

00:34:50.000 It's like the little hair out of place, the shape of the head.

00:34:53.000 He's good at his job, isn't he?

00:34:55.000 That's crazy.

00:34:56.000 Wait, can we do a side-by-side?

00:34:59.000 Side-by-side west.

00:35:06.000 What are you doing?

00:35:07.000 You're wasting everyone's time.

00:35:18.000 Yeah, that's you.

00:35:19.000 Good stuff, dude.

00:35:21.000 He's good at drawing.

00:35:22.000 And also in the news, it's Aerie McCurdy's birthday.

00:35:25.000 Oh, happy birthday.

00:35:26.000 Big 4-0 for Ari.

00:35:28.000 So everyone who knows her, please say happy 3-5 to old Ari.

00:35:33.000 I don't think I remember what she looks like.

00:35:35.000 I think she's pretty and kind of hipstery in a 60s go-go boots kind of way.

00:35:40.000 She's the one who puts all the show notes up on the gavinmcinnis.win, which I highly recommend you check out.

00:35:46.000 And that's the way you can have these wonderful notes.

00:35:50.000 We haven't had any auctions for a while or selling the notes or anything.

00:35:54.000 Our banking is being attacked and they don't like auctions.

00:35:57.000 So we've had to tread lately, especially because we've had the FBI up our fucking ass after January 6th.

00:36:04.000 They're assuming that we're involved somehow.

00:36:06.000 So my calls are being monitored.

00:36:08.000 Everyone who called me before, like Jay Johnson, he called me on January 4th, said, are you going to this thing?

00:36:14.000 And I said, fuck no.

00:36:15.000 He said his hotel room was expensive.

00:36:17.000 Next thing you know, the FBI puts out an APB.

00:36:20.000 And of course, the pussy beta male faggot comedy community in LA can't wait to roast him.

00:36:29.000 So Tim Heidecker called him out.

00:36:32.000 And then some dude that used to date, that's married to Jay's ex-girlfriend, was pouring over pictures and being like, here he is at 350 in the top right.

00:36:41.000 Like Twitter just couldn't help to expose him.

00:36:44.000 They were besides themselves with joy.

00:36:49.000 And he didn't do anything wrong.

00:36:50.000 He had nothing to do with the storming of the Capitol.

00:36:52.000 He saw it going off in the distance and went, yikes, and left.

00:36:56.000 So apparently as of yesterday, his lawyer called him and said, yeah, they're dropping everything.

00:37:00.000 They realize they don't have a case.

00:37:02.000 Good.

00:37:02.000 Thank God.

00:37:04.000 What a goddamn joke.

00:37:06.000 It looks like they're dropping everything with Proud Boys, too.

00:37:08.000 Well, they're dropping the sedition thing, right?

00:37:11.000 Sedition.

00:37:14.000 And I'll find my way to get back home again.

00:37:17.000 Yeah, well, there's, you know what I was talking to Rufio Panman the other day, and he pointed out, we were all going to a Michael Graves party that wasn't in DC.

00:37:25.000 And then Enrique, this might have been the same thing.

00:37:27.000 They wanted to go to bars where they weren't going to get killed.

00:37:30.000 And the last two times they went to Harry's, they got stabbed.

00:37:32.000 I said, don't go to D.C., but I guess they figured, we'll still go to D.C., but we'll leave.

00:37:36.000 So they all had plans to leave, and there's all records of this.

00:37:39.000 Uh-oh, I'm too fat to close this blazer now.

00:37:42.000 There's records of them saying, we've got to go to this, we got to go to that.

00:37:45.000 And so Michael Graves must have text saying, yeah, come by my thing.

00:37:49.000 I'm having a party at two.

00:37:50.000 Not in D.C., not near a storming of a capital.

00:37:54.000 So for the first time in a long time, it looks like good news.

00:37:56.000 What's that article you sent me?

00:37:58.000 Yeah, it's...

00:37:59.000 It's not in the notes.

00:38:00.000 It's Rode Reuters.

00:38:03.000 It looked pretty good.

00:38:05.000 They were saying nobody out of all the 400 people apprehended have gotten the sedition charge.

00:38:11.000 And they called.

00:38:12.000 So you just typed in Reuters.

00:38:13.000 And they called...

00:38:14.000 Is that not a little broad?

00:38:16.000 Well, I'm going to search on the site.

00:38:17.000 And they called.

00:38:19.000 No, you can just go Reuters Proud Boys.

00:38:21.000 Reuters.com, whatever, Proud Boys in the.

00:38:23.000 Proud Boys, yeah.

00:38:24.000 I got the Proud Boys.

00:38:26.000 Oh, you know, I'm going to type in sedition.

00:38:31.000 So you texted it to me, so it's not on my computer.

00:38:36.000 Holy fuck, Ryan.

00:38:38.000 Well, I could just tell you.

00:38:40.000 Because the important part is they said rubber.

00:38:41.000 Pull up the article.

00:38:42.000 People want to see the proof.

00:38:44.000 Okay.

00:38:44.000 Let's prove it.

00:38:46.000 Prove it.

00:38:47.000 Amid setbacks, there we go.

00:38:51.000 Prosecutors abandoned some claims in U.S. Capitol Riot cases.

00:38:55.000 See, that's why we wanted the actual article up.

00:38:58.000 It takes a while to get to the Proud Boys part, But it is about Ruffio.

00:39:02.000 And they were saying the 10 out of the 12 people were oath keepers, which is a thing that most people don't even know about.

00:39:12.000 So it's kind of like.

00:39:13.000 So 10 of the 12 were oath keepers, so the only two were Biggs and Ethan.

00:39:18.000 Yeah, finally those were.

00:39:19.000 Right?

00:39:20.000 Is that it?

00:39:22.000 But then I hear there's 60 arrested.

00:39:24.000 There we go.

00:39:25.000 Prosecutors said in March 1st, court finally Ethan Nordine, a member of the right-wing Proud Boys group.

00:39:29.000 Thanks for not saying Nazi or neo-fascist.

00:39:32.000 Dressed all in black, wearing a tactical vest, led the Proud Boys through the use of encrypted communications.

00:39:36.000 Prosecutors subsequently acknowledged that Nordine's cell phone battery died on January 6th and was not functioning the entire day.

00:39:44.000 Nice.

00:39:45.000 A judge denied a prosecution a bid to jail Nordine, citing a death of evidence, a dearth of evidence, that he directed others.

00:39:53.000 Let me go down a little more.

00:39:54.000 I can't read it.

00:39:56.000 That he directed others to use or carry weapons.

00:39:59.000 Ah, prosecutors are now making a third attempt to have him detained.

00:40:04.000 A bunch of just asshole.

00:40:06.000 What is their motivation to get a win, like a legal win?

00:40:09.000 Or they're activists or they're just assholes or they're crooked?

00:40:13.000 Like why?

00:40:14.000 I think a federal prosecutor now with the law firm said while bail arguments do not require the same high standard of proof as criminal trials and can sometimes venture into hyperbole.

00:40:26.000 There we go.

00:40:26.000 That should have been in the headline.

00:40:28.000 Hyperbole on Capitol Hill.

00:40:31.000 Some of the potential issues with the evidence in the oathkeeper's case could haunt prosecutors.

00:40:35.000 So it turns out prosecutors misunderstood the meaning of certain text messages that would not be a small error.

00:40:40.000 Ferrer said this could color the way the judge sees this case going forward.

00:40:44.000 Blah, blah, blah.

00:40:45.000 Yeah.

00:40:45.000 Yeah, because they were talking about the major piece of evidence was like their downstairs gassed the floorboards, which was like a joke.

00:40:52.000 And then also the person didn't read that.

00:40:55.000 And it was like, well, even if it's in bad taste, that's not like damning evidence.

00:40:59.000 Right.

00:41:00.000 And there was that other guy, Milkshake, who said, yeah, let's storm the Capitol.

00:41:03.000 And everyone went, that's not funny.

00:41:04.000 Don't say shit like that.

00:41:05.000 Just strong, stupid language that we're all guilty of.

00:41:07.000 We get angry and we type things.

00:41:09.000 Well, why don't we start the Proud Boys bumper then if we're drifting into that area of expertise?

00:41:15.000 Proud boys don't start fights.

00:41:16.000 They finish.

00:41:26.000 So it turns out that feds came to a Green Beret's house and tried to make him spy on Proud Boys.

00:41:33.000 Luckily, he recorded the encounter.

00:41:35.000 We're now down to 4-5.

00:41:37.000 This isn't what you sign up for when you sign up to enlist.

00:41:41.000 You are told you may go anywhere in the world and fight for America's best interests, for American citizens' best interests.

00:41:48.000 You shouldn't be then expected to come home and spy on patriotic American citizens.

00:41:55.000 That's not the deal.

00:41:56.000 So he recorded the entire conversation.

00:41:59.000 It's shocking to hear.

00:42:01.000 And he didn't say no.

00:42:03.000 He played into them.

00:42:04.000 There they are, knocking on his door.

00:42:05.000 They pretended they were there for an offensive tweet.

00:42:09.000 But the tweets, they never even brought up the tweet.

00:42:11.000 The tweet was irrelevant.

00:42:12.000 They wanted him to spy.

00:42:14.000 And every Prowboys meetup, we used to say, I wonder what the fed, which ones of this group, how many are feds?

00:42:22.000 And we think, what a great gig.

00:42:24.000 You're making, what, 80 to 100K a year just to go and drink booze?

00:42:29.000 There's no big blueprints laid out.

00:42:31.000 We're going to start here and go here.

00:42:33.000 By the way, side note here.

00:42:35.000 I was watching one of my famous war movies that gave me my infinite, I mean, endless medals.

00:42:40.000 He did another tour?

00:42:41.000 Did another tour, and it was World War II this time, and they're saying it was a trap where the Germans allowed the English to think that they were pushing the Germans back, and then they had them surrounded and would just envelop them.

00:42:53.000 And I get that concept, especially with modern technology and great drones and stuff.

00:42:59.000 But I don't get how in World War II, when I don't even understand how you could follow a map back then, there was so much shelling that it was just a desert of mud and broken trees and bramble and shelled out buildings.

00:43:12.000 How the fuck did anyone know where they were?

00:43:14.000 I don't know.

00:43:15.000 And they're looking at the map.

00:43:16.000 Okay, here we go.

00:43:17.000 Yeah, they're over here.

00:43:17.000 Now, how do you know they're over there?

00:43:19.000 How do you know more than like 100 feet in any direction?

00:43:22.000 There's that hill there.

00:43:23.000 Maybe I could get a hill, sort of.

00:43:26.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:43:27.000 But I don't understand.

00:43:28.000 And they went, oh, they're almost here.

00:43:29.000 Oh, they've made it to here on the line.

00:43:31.000 Like, what?

00:43:31.000 Did you have markers?

00:43:32.000 Like, 7A.

00:43:34.000 They've passed 7A, and there's 7A on the map.

00:43:36.000 Maybe.

00:43:36.000 But they didn't do that.

00:43:38.000 What about Alexander the Great?

00:43:40.000 His whole fucking tour around that area, like just dominant.

00:43:42.000 I was just reading about that.

00:43:43.000 I was like, how the fuck?

00:43:44.000 I don't understand.

00:43:45.000 It took him years to tell us.

00:43:46.000 How wars were done anytime before 1990?

00:43:50.000 I'm in.

00:43:51.000 Without GPS.

00:43:52.000 Or I saw this thing on my Instagram and it was like a sponsored thing, but it was some science doohickey where the guy like glued two, four bolts to a plug, and then he took the positive and the negative plug and he wrapped copper wire around both bolts about 10 times.

00:44:08.000 And then he plugs in a light bulb and it comes on.

00:44:12.000 And I'm like, I'm a chick.

00:44:15.000 I want to fuck that guy.

00:44:16.000 I'm a girl.

00:44:17.000 Take me out for dinner.

00:44:19.000 I guess I'll suck you off for a new purse.

00:44:24.000 I don't know how it works, but I'm not a dude.

00:44:26.000 Because that is, I am African.

00:44:29.000 I'm an African tribesman.

00:44:30.000 You eat the poo-poo.

00:44:32.000 He mega.

00:44:32.000 He spin the capaway.

00:44:35.000 And the light go boom.

00:44:36.000 It's voodoo.

00:44:37.000 Yeah.

00:44:38.000 Same with sewing machines.

00:44:39.000 They are voodoo.

00:44:41.000 The needle goes up and down.

00:44:43.000 And the thread, it goes in and out, but the man never touches and lets go.

00:44:47.000 If you're sewing something, you need to let go and then attach it again on the other side.

00:44:52.000 The sewing machine does not do that.

00:44:53.000 It is a voodoo.

00:44:55.000 Nothing wrong with that.

00:44:57.000 Voodoo.

00:45:01.000 This is the most accurate map of the world ever.

00:45:04.000 That looks like shit.

00:45:06.000 Sucks.

00:45:06.000 What are we doing way over there?

00:45:09.000 We want to be over here on the left.

00:45:11.000 Why do they get to be in the cool spot?

00:45:13.000 Isn't it a coincidence that Asia is the center of the universe in this and he won an award for good drawing of the earth?

00:45:20.000 Design.

00:45:21.000 Look at that.

00:45:21.000 Look, I make Asia number one.

00:45:23.000 Is fire.

00:45:24.000 Smash the subscribe.

00:45:28.000 Oh my God, we're here?

00:45:30.000 Yes, we're here.

00:45:31.000 Okay, I've been excited about this moment for a while now.

00:45:35.000 Are we way behind on things?

00:45:36.000 Because we didn't see this.

00:45:37.000 We're not going to show this.

00:45:38.000 No, you can see the article.

00:45:39.000 It's basically him telling the guy to spy on Proud Boys.

00:45:44.000 And then also, Margaret Green.

00:45:46.000 Check that out on your own time.

00:45:47.000 Nobody trailer, we already saw that.

00:45:48.000 But what about.

00:45:49.000 Did we get to this?

00:45:50.000 Yes.

00:45:50.000 What the fuck are you doing, Ryan?

00:45:52.000 Slowing down the show.

00:45:52.000 I'm just saying, we never finished the actual song part.

00:45:55.000 We don't need to finish the fucking song part.

00:45:56.000 Are you making me do my job differently?

00:45:58.000 I'm just making sure.

00:45:59.000 It seemed like...

00:45:59.000 But don't make sure you just interrupted the show with bullshit.

00:46:02.000 I was interested in the end of that.

00:46:03.000 Shut up.

00:46:04.000 And so a viewer might be.

00:46:06.000 Okay, this is the worst article I've ever read.

00:46:08.000 I tried to get her phone number, but it's not available.

00:46:11.000 I have her email.

00:46:11.000 I'll email her.

00:46:13.000 But it's all about how sexist and racist and evil the Proud Boys are.

00:46:16.000 I mean, sorry, Death from Above are.

00:46:19.000 Because Jesse Kessler used to hang out with me.

00:46:23.000 The guy with the mustache and the dark hair.

00:46:25.000 Now, him and I overlap politically because he is an Indian.

00:46:30.000 He does not look at buddy, but his mom is from India.

00:46:34.000 And his dad is white and he got a lot of the white stuff.

00:46:36.000 But you can tell by the mustache, he got a lot of the Indian stuff.

00:46:40.000 And Indians, generally, if they're well-informed, they're not fans of radical Islam because Indians were killed to the tune of about a million.

00:46:48.000 See, no one ever talks about this, but Britain said, all right, Pakistan, you don't like being in India?

00:46:53.000 We're going to, sorry, Muslims.

00:46:54.000 We're going to give you Pakistan.

00:46:55.000 We're going to give you the top of India.

00:46:57.000 Great.

00:46:58.000 But as the Pakistanis were going north to Pakistan and the Indians were coming south, the Indians coming south were slaughtered, massacred.

00:47:09.000 Actually, both sides were massacring, but the Muslims were destroying Indians.

00:47:13.000 They're still destroying Indians on a regular basis.

00:47:15.000 So Indians are not fans of Pakistan.

00:47:19.000 And they harbor some resentment, just like the Scots and the English.

00:47:22.000 And I think Jesse has a bit of that.

00:47:24.000 He's also a big gun guy.

00:47:26.000 Anyway, we were pals.

00:47:27.000 And back when Proud Boys didn't mean anything, like in the first few months, when it just meant, I don't hate the West.

00:47:33.000 He was like, yeah, I'm in.

00:47:34.000 I'm a Proud Boy.

00:47:36.000 It meant like, I'm a super fan, or I'm a, what does Lady Gaga call her fans?

00:47:41.000 Little monsters.

00:47:42.000 I'm a little monster, whatever.

00:47:44.000 And then shit started getting real.

00:47:45.000 And the second it did, he's like, you're dead to me.

00:47:48.000 Proud boys are out.

00:47:48.000 Fuck you.

00:47:50.000 And I was like, just like that, huh?

00:47:51.000 And he goes, I'm not giving away my whole career just because I knew you once.

00:47:56.000 He goes, I've never dealt with this shit before.

00:47:58.000 I don't know how you deal with this lifestyle.

00:47:59.000 It's insane.

00:48:00.000 People are coming at me, coming at my wife, my parents.

00:48:03.000 What the fuck?

00:48:04.000 Get away from me.

00:48:06.000 I was like, okay, bye.

00:48:09.000 But it didn't work.

00:48:11.000 He had touched me once.

00:48:13.000 So even though he got out at the very, very beginning and never spoke to me once again after that, and we were pretty close, the fact is that he knew me once and he must pay for that.

00:48:22.000 But this article gets even stupider than that.

00:48:25.000 You see, Death from Above, she goes, I suspected he was a Nazi because he once knew Gavin McInnis, but then they go, it's proven because, ready for the smoking gun?

00:48:35.000 Death from Above have a song called Dead Womb, wherein they state, I'm sick of girls, sluts coming up to me with cocaine and wanting to meet in the bathroom or something like that.

00:48:46.000 Yeah, here we go.

00:48:47.000 What does it say?

00:48:47.000 I can't read it.

00:48:49.000 Move it over.

00:48:53.000 We're looking for wives so tired of sluts coming up to us in the clubs with their cocaine.

00:49:00.000 That's the crime.

00:49:01.000 She was irked.

00:49:02.000 That's the crime.

00:49:03.000 And the song's called Dead Womb because it's about women who let their ovaries die.

00:49:07.000 Guess who's writing this article?

00:49:09.000 Guess what her womb is?

00:49:11.000 Is it dead?

00:49:12.000 It's dead.

00:49:13.000 She's a cat mom.

00:49:15.000 It's gratefully dead?

00:49:16.000 That's her there.

00:49:17.000 Cat mom.

00:49:18.000 Offended by the concept of a womb dying being bad because her womb died and that's not bad.

00:49:25.000 I love my cats.

00:49:27.000 But you've got to read this fucking article.

00:49:30.000 It is so self-indulgent and meandering.

00:49:33.000 I can't believe she wrote for Vice.

00:49:35.000 And by the way, Vice discovered Death from Above.

00:49:38.000 Our record guy discovered them in a pile of tossed CDs.

00:49:43.000 He said, this sounds interesting.

00:49:45.000 And that was the beginning of their career.

00:49:48.000 I'm relieved we still live in a culture where an artist's association with the alt-right, alt-right, what is this, 2016, provokes disgust and disavowal.

00:49:57.000 But I am also genuinely confused by the surprise.

00:50:00.000 Why do you so Death from Above's brand has been hipster men's rights activists from the start?

00:50:05.000 That is the crux of her point.

00:50:07.000 You're a men's rights activist if you're sick as sluts with cocaine in the bathroom and you want a wife.

00:50:13.000 And then in the same article, she talks about the proud boys venerate the housewife.

00:50:18.000 You see that in blue there.

00:50:19.000 As more proof that he's a white nationalist.

00:50:24.000 What?

00:50:25.000 Wow.

00:50:27.000 Go to the very end.

00:50:29.000 It goes on and on and on.

00:50:30.000 She quotes herself.

00:50:31.000 She quotes herself.

00:50:32.000 Big quotes.

00:50:33.000 But see, go to the end.

00:50:35.000 That last one.

00:50:36.000 The way she ties it all together is, I know that misogyny and white nationalism intersect and inform one another.

00:50:44.000 That's it.

00:50:45.000 So I'm very happy to see that Death from Above are ostracized because they once new Gavin.

00:50:50.000 One of them wants New Gavin.

00:50:51.000 I don't know why you're surprised.

00:50:53.000 They telegraphed it with their song Dead Womb where they said they'd like to marry a woman and not just bang her in the bathroom with Coke.

00:50:59.000 I'm not exaggerating.

00:51:00.000 And here's my proof that's about white nationalism because it is.

00:51:07.000 Need I say more?

00:51:09.000 But let's look at this article for a sec.

00:51:11.000 You can read the whole thing on GavinMcKinnis.win when we put up the notes, but it's just like the CBC is government-funded media.

00:51:21.000 So there's no standards whatsoever.

00:51:24.000 What is this?

00:51:25.000 So go down a bit.

00:51:27.000 Okay, go that.

00:51:28.000 No, no, that's too far.

00:51:30.000 Now scooch it over so I can read it.

00:51:31.000 I've been trying to say this publicly for literal years.

00:51:35.000 Literal years.

00:51:39.000 This is the funny thing about you, Julia.

00:51:40.000 You're not a writer.

00:51:42.000 In this article, you talk about how it took you years to write this article and you wrote a lot about Death from Above, but never published it.

00:51:47.000 In other words, I wrote about them in my diary.

00:51:51.000 I have a lot of diary entries about my love for Sebastian, the other guy.

00:51:58.000 What does he say?

00:51:59.000 I was irked by that cocaine line.

00:52:02.000 Meanwhile, they're trying to prevent you.

00:52:04.000 You know what she does?

00:52:05.000 She's a vegan cook who's a cat mom.

00:52:08.000 And she makes recipes for no one.

00:52:10.000 No one wants your fucking food.

00:52:11.000 You don't have kids to enjoy it.

00:52:12.000 You're not building a home.

00:52:14.000 You wasted your life, you silly cow.

00:52:16.000 And you devoted it to what?

00:52:17.000 Writing.

00:52:18.000 You suck at writing.

00:52:19.000 You just admitted it took you years.

00:52:22.000 Years to write an article about Death from Above.

00:52:24.000 Death from Above are a rock band.

00:52:26.000 That's like a two-hour job.

00:52:29.000 Not a two-year job, my dear, unless you suck.

00:52:31.000 And you shouldn't be doing this job.

00:52:33.000 She writes fiction also.

00:52:34.000 Oh, I write fiction.

00:52:35.000 Yep.

00:52:36.000 We need you.

00:52:37.000 We need you.

00:52:39.000 No tofu?

00:52:40.000 No problem.

00:52:41.000 No ovaries?

00:52:42.000 No problem.

00:52:43.000 No future?

00:52:44.000 No problem.

00:52:44.000 No kids?

00:52:45.000 There's always cats.

00:52:47.000 Anyway, go back to the article.

00:52:52.000 This was in 2002.

00:52:54.000 So she's writing about something nine years ago, 11 years ago?

00:52:58.000 Yeah.

00:52:59.000 The feeling stuck like sharp sand in a scrape.

00:53:02.000 Oh, she's so evocative.

00:53:04.000 I had to read that a few times, by the way, because I was thinking of scraping into sand.

00:53:08.000 Who gets sharp sand in their scrapes?

00:53:11.000 You mean a cut?

00:53:13.000 Sharp sand in a scrape.

00:53:16.000 I wrote a bunch about it, but never published a word for a couple of reasons.

00:53:20.000 First, I didn't have the vocab in the early odds to say what repulsed me.

00:53:23.000 You still don't have the vocab, my dear.

00:53:25.000 Second, I went to high school with the other member of DFA, singer and drummer Sebastian Granger.

00:53:30.000 I was part of the gaggle that sat around him on the lawn of the school while he strummed his guitar and sang you too.

00:53:37.000 See, we get to see who she really is there.

00:53:40.000 We were still friends when Dead Womb came out, not close, blah, blah, blah.

00:53:44.000 I asked if we could talk about the song for a piece I hoped to write one day.

00:53:49.000 Like, why are you telling me this?

00:53:50.000 This is just someone talking to like their twin sister.

00:53:53.000 Not even a friend.

00:53:54.000 A friend wouldn't be like, okay, wrap it up.

00:53:57.000 I interviewed him in his green living room, recorded on cassette.

00:54:00.000 She took a writer's workshop where they told her to use a lot of adjectives.

00:54:04.000 It's good to use adjectives.

00:54:07.000 It helps develop a picture in the reader's mind.

00:54:11.000 Evoke with your words.

00:54:14.000 Have the language at your disposal.

00:54:16.000 We were both nervous.

00:54:17.000 I didn't know what I wanted to ask.

00:54:18.000 Do you hate women?

00:54:19.000 Do you think they are your toys?

00:54:21.000 He didn't know how to answer.

00:54:23.000 No, they said the opposite.

00:54:25.000 They said, we're sick of women offering themselves up.

00:54:28.000 You can grab them by the pussy.

00:54:29.000 We don't want that.

00:54:30.000 We want wives.

00:54:34.000 I wish I still had the tape.

00:54:35.000 Yeah, you suck at everything you do.

00:54:38.000 But I remember discussing, too, his aversion to women who poison their wombs.

00:54:42.000 I can still feel the anger that trembled in my chest as we spoke, the frustration of not knowing how to put it.

00:54:48.000 As her womb was rotting on the vine.

00:54:51.000 Go down a bit more?

00:54:55.000 I messed with my essay for months.

00:54:58.000 We're learning about an essay she tried to write 11 years ago.

00:55:03.000 Am I dumb?

00:55:06.000 Nine years ago.

00:55:08.000 I might have been able to articulate the worldview.

00:55:10.000 I was heard and go, my essay circled close to the truth.

00:55:16.000 I backed off.

00:55:18.000 I touched a heated toilet seat in the band's trailer.

00:55:21.000 This is writing.

00:55:22.000 Are you kidding?

00:55:23.000 Wait, wait.

00:55:23.000 What's right above the picture?

00:55:26.000 And by the way, their star rose because of me, you silly cunt.

00:55:30.000 The evil Nazi.

00:55:34.000 I droared the essay, la, blah, blah.

00:55:36.000 Keeps going.

00:55:37.000 Sounds like she's talking about a prized teddy bear.

00:55:43.000 That's why Keillor's recent trouble came as no surprise.

00:55:47.000 He played down his relationship with McInnes.

00:55:49.000 He explains that he met McInnis when Vice Records released their early work with regard to him being a proud boy.

00:55:53.000 It's completely false.

00:55:53.000 I never joined that group.

00:55:55.000 Keillor concedes that he and McInnis remained friendly and as our lives diverged.

00:55:58.000 We spoke mostly about dad's stuff as we both have kids.

00:56:01.000 He's not all right.

00:56:02.000 He's just a curious father too.

00:56:03.000 Blah, blah, blah.

00:56:03.000 Anyway, you've got to check out this article.

00:56:05.000 It's an absolute honking pile of shit.

00:56:08.000 But it also shows you how bad women are at writing and how most of them are just playing house.

00:56:16.000 Now, again, most of my favorite writers are women.

00:56:18.000 I don't know why.

00:56:20.000 But I just keep seeing this amateur hour at the Apollo again and again and again, where they focus on vegan cooking and their cats.

00:56:28.000 And when it's time to write, it takes them years, literal years, to get it done.

00:56:34.000 Look at her.

00:56:35.000 She's meant to be a mom.

00:56:37.000 She's meant to be a housewife.

00:56:38.000 But she spent too much time defending the concept of sucking dick and doing Coke in the bathroom, which neither of which I bet she did.

00:56:46.000 So she got the worst of both worlds.

00:56:48.000 At least Groupies got to suck off Vince Neal.

00:56:51.000 She's probably dating some bald Jewish guy who's petrified of her asking where the ring is.

00:56:56.000 Wait, what's that?

00:56:57.000 A baby?

00:57:03.000 Her beautiful son, Larry.

00:57:04.000 Oh, okay, that's not hers.

00:57:06.000 And became the incredible mom.

00:57:07.000 Wait, wait, I got to read this.

00:57:09.000 Go back to Larry.

00:57:10.000 Her beautiful son, Larry, became the incredible mom she was born to be.

00:57:14.000 Oh, you don't say.

00:57:17.000 So she wasn't meant to have a dead womb.

00:57:21.000 And I'm blown away by the calm and sense of humor and just unbridled joy she's embroiled since, embodied since.

00:57:27.000 I'm so happy for you, Maggie.

00:57:30.000 This is her watching Larry in the crib.

00:57:32.000 Congratulations.

00:57:35.000 I'm so happy for you.

00:57:38.000 I'm so happy for you, Maggie.

00:57:40.000 I love to watch you and Larry together.

00:57:42.000 I hope he bakes you as nice a cake as that awesome sheep mobile you made him.

00:57:50.000 Congratulations.

00:57:54.000 I'm going to email her that.

00:57:56.000 How big is that?

00:57:58.000 Congratulations.

00:57:59.000 So like three megabytes?

00:58:01.000 Couple.

00:58:01.000 Let's see here.

00:58:02.000 I can put it in an email?

00:58:04.000 I would think so.

00:58:04.000 I'm going to email her.

00:58:05.000 This is you.

00:58:06.000 4.6 megabytes.

00:58:07.000 This is you with, what's his name, Maggie and Larry?

00:58:12.000 Congratulations.

00:58:13.000 This is you congratulating Maggie on her new boy, Larry.

00:58:17.000 Well, I made a pesto noodle tofu supplement.

00:58:21.000 I made tofu cat food.

00:58:23.000 Look, I dressed as a shitty wrapping paper on Christmas Day.

00:58:26.000 I'm so happy.

00:58:28.000 I'm glad I never had kids and I have $3 fucking Home Depot plants hanging on my windowsill in my shitty apartment.

00:58:37.000 Well, I got to eat this all by myself.

00:58:39.000 Oh, great.

00:58:41.000 There was a lot of leftovers, so it went bad.

00:58:43.000 I didn't get a chance to eat it all.

00:58:45.000 so, again, I don't have a problem with women writing.

00:58:48.000 I just hate when I can tell that women are being promoted in the art world or in the media world or in any world just because they're women.

00:58:54.000 And it's so obvious they suck, and it's so embarrassing.

00:58:56.000 For example, Fantagraphics just put out this book this lesbian did.

00:59:00.000 4-7.

00:59:01.000 And it's embarrassing.

00:59:02.000 Real quick, she's Julia Nochilds.

00:59:05.000 I'm writing that down.

00:59:08.000 4-6?

00:59:10.000 Yeah.

00:59:11.000 Like, Fantagraphics in the graphic novel world, they have very high standards.

00:59:16.000 4-7, sorry.

00:59:18.000 And it's really hard to get in there, and it's hard to become a cartoonist.

00:59:22.000 And then, and I know that sounds stupid to you, but trust me, it is.

00:59:26.000 Like, Robert Crumb deserves a lot more respect than he gets from outside the cartoon world.

00:59:32.000 But look at this piece of shit diary that just got, it's getting heavily promoted by them.

00:59:41.000 River teamed up with.

00:59:42.000 Like, that's a full page.

00:59:45.000 Just her writing in a notebook.

00:59:47.000 And look at the drawing.

00:59:49.000 Go up a bit?

00:59:50.000 Look how bad it is.

00:59:52.000 Look at that nose.

00:59:55.000 And what the fuck's in his hand?

00:59:56.000 An invisible glass?

00:59:57.000 I think it's a party hat.

00:59:59.000 Oh.

01:00:00.000 But his fingers are through it.

01:00:01.000 But he's not holding it right.

01:00:03.000 Like, you can't draw, lady.

01:00:06.000 And that's her on her own Instagram promoting one of the better pages.

01:00:11.000 It's fucking...

01:00:12.000 Can you not see how much you suck?

01:00:14.000 The handwriting's really bad.

01:00:15.000 But she's a lesbian and she's fat and ugly.

01:00:18.000 So they go, well, this would be good for our brand.

01:00:20.000 Look at that.

01:00:21.000 That's scary.

01:00:23.000 That's a creepy possibility.

01:00:24.000 And there's all kinds of like whiteout repairing the mistakes.

01:00:28.000 Pathetic.

01:00:30.000 But maybe Antifa won't burn down her headquarters if we appease them.

01:00:33.000 And here's the last thing.

01:00:35.000 Oh.

01:00:36.000 Nice noses.

01:00:38.000 That sucks.

01:00:39.000 You're really good at noses.

01:00:41.000 Oh, yeah.

01:00:42.000 Someone's a big fan of Iran Madden.

01:00:45.000 That's Steve Madden's fucking favorite politician.

01:00:50.000 This is another vice chick, by the way.

01:00:51.000 This is just a weird thing I saw on Instagram 4-H.

01:00:54.000 And the first chick I showed you wrote for Broadley.

01:00:57.000 So she's another vice alma mater.

01:00:59.000 But this is just alarmingly nihilistic.

01:01:03.000 Why your true self is an illusion.

01:01:06.000 And when I first saw that, I didn't think about it.

01:01:08.000 And then like two days later, I just thought, it is what it is, always bothered me.

01:01:13.000 But now we've gone below that.

01:01:14.000 Now that isn't even is.

01:01:17.000 That doesn't exist.

01:01:18.000 We don't exist.

01:01:19.000 And this is women without children.

01:01:21.000 They just get so stripped down until they're like, we're just husks.

01:01:26.000 There's no reason to live.

01:01:27.000 Yeah, because you took away your number one reason to live.

01:01:30.000 You took away your eggs, which brings us to feminism.

01:01:37.000 Which is cancer.

01:01:40.000 Sure, we can make it cancer.

01:01:58.000 That's a weird one.

01:02:00.000 4-0.

01:02:02.000 Marriage is wonderful.

01:02:03.000 Let's just, instead of shitting on women who forgo marriage, let's praise them for a little bit.

01:02:09.000 Liz Wheeler, young women, don't let the lies of feminism fool you.

01:02:12.000 Marriage is wonderful.

01:02:14.000 Your fertility is a gift.

01:02:16.000 Sex is holy.

01:02:18.000 You're not an object.

01:02:20.000 Dead womb.

01:02:21.000 Don't go to the bathroom with Coke constantly blowing dudes.

01:02:24.000 You're better than that.

01:02:26.000 Hookups are meaningless.

01:02:28.000 Babies are a blessing.

01:02:30.000 Motherhood is empowering.

01:02:32.000 You can still also have a career, but trust me, after it comes out, you won't want one.

01:02:37.000 All of the above is true.

01:02:39.000 Go to 4-1.

01:02:43.000 4-1 and for all.

01:02:47.000 Oh, this is a biggie.

01:02:48.000 Bloomberg Business Week, front page, cover.

01:02:51.000 Freeze your eggs, free your career.

01:02:54.000 What could possibly go wrong?

01:02:57.000 Sounds good, right?

01:02:58.000 What's the next pick?

01:03:01.000 Zoom in a bit?

01:03:03.000 So cruel twist of fate for a single woman who froze her eggs in her 30s to quote-unquote free her career.

01:03:08.000 Of course, this isn't the front page of Bloomberg.

01:03:10.000 This isn't the front page of anything.

01:03:12.000 This is some random news article stuffed on page 36.

01:03:16.000 But zoom in on the underlined part.

01:03:21.000 Despite the $19,000 cost, people talk about Barbara Corcoran.

01:03:26.000 They go, she invented New York real estate, really, and made it into a profitable thing when it was nothing in the 80s.

01:03:33.000 And she's got kids.

01:03:34.000 Yeah, she had a bunch of miscarriages and she spent $360,000 making her two kids.

01:03:42.000 That's $180,000 each.

01:03:47.000 Two eggs failed to survive the thawing process.

01:03:51.000 Uh-oh.

01:03:52.000 You see, they think it's magic freezing their eggs.

01:03:55.000 Scroll down because I'm cutting it off, which you can see if you look at your monitor.

01:03:59.000 Three more failed to fertilize.

01:04:00.000 That left six embryos, of which five appeared to be abnormal.

01:04:04.000 Oh.

01:04:06.000 The last one was implanted in her uterus.

01:04:08.000 On the morning of March 7th, she got the devastating news that it, too, had failed.

01:04:13.000 Adams was not pregnant, and her chances of carrying her genetic child, a little more, Ryan, had just dropped to near zero.

01:04:22.000 She remembers screaming like a wild animal, throwing books, papers, her laptop, and collapsing to the ground.

01:04:28.000 So when Death from Above sing dead womb, and we say venerate the housewife, we're not trying to oppress you.

01:04:35.000 We're not trying to ruin your life.

01:04:37.000 We're trying to prevent you screaming like a wild animal.

01:04:41.000 Is that so wrong?

01:04:44.000 What's this 142?

01:04:53.000 I love this.

01:04:54.000 Nice and simple.

01:04:56.000 What is it now?

01:05:00.000 We got to get, I'll get a new TV soon, but in the, you got to be a little faster here.

01:05:03.000 I'm only 29.

01:05:04.000 I already knew I was late to the game being pregnant at 29.

01:05:06.000 My first kid's at 30.

01:05:07.000 And fertility aside, it's not as easy to care for children in your late 30s or 40s as it is in your 20s.

01:05:12.000 That's another thing.

01:05:13.000 It's not magic, this freezing the eggs.

01:05:15.000 Say you do pull it off.

01:05:16.000 I mean, my wife had our youngest boy at like 41.

01:05:20.000 I'm a 50-year-old with young kids.

01:05:23.000 I'm tired.

01:05:25.000 I don't leap out of bed clicking my heels.

01:05:28.000 So play this.

01:05:29.000 This is fascinating.

01:05:30.000 I'm glad we finally got to this because I've had it set up for a long time.

01:05:46.000 I've got all the time in the world.

01:05:48.000 And then you take this test and you're like, maybe not.

01:05:50.000 And I'm not broken or whatever, but like to hear as a woman, like you're going to have issues and like that your body is like not up to par.

01:05:57.000 Like I'm only 29.

01:05:58.000 Like I'm not thinking about having a baby anytime soon, but I'm glad that I took it because now I know.

01:06:03.000 So now I'm trying to be proactive and get all the blood tests done.

01:06:06.000 Then I'll probably have to like talk to a fertility doctor and like see where I'm at from there and then freeze some eggs of mine.

01:06:14.000 I think it's really important to talk about these things because one, you don't feel so alone.

01:06:19.000 And two, if I hadn't seen Crystal post about this, I wouldn't have tested this thing for at least five years probably, if ever.

01:06:29.000 And then it would have probably been too late for me.

01:06:36.000 Peak time is 20 to 25.

01:06:39.000 That's when you want to make your babies.

01:06:40.000 That's when you want to make five.

01:06:42.000 25 to 30 is pretty good.

01:06:45.000 It's getting trickier towards the end of the 20s.

01:06:48.000 For the billionth time, and I'm going to get an hourglass as a prop here.

01:06:56.000 At 30, the hourglass turns upside down and the sand is draining from 30 to 35.

01:07:02.000 At 35, the sand is gone.

01:07:04.000 Please stop telling me about your aunt or my wife or my mother who both had a kid at 40.

01:07:10.000 It's rare.

01:07:12.000 It's especially rare for them not to have autism if they're male.

01:07:15.000 There's usually problems.

01:07:16.000 Thank God, knock on wood.

01:07:20.000 I haven't had any problems.

01:07:23.000 Although my youngest boy seems really into show tunes, so we'll see about that.

01:07:29.000 But you really, really need to take this seriously.

01:07:33.000 And also, ladies, how much do you gain from slutting around?

01:07:37.000 I slutted around for a good 17 till 31, 32.

01:07:44.000 That was a long, that's a lot of slutting.

01:07:47.000 That's 15 years of sucking tits and doing Coke, smoking drugs, getting high.

01:07:53.000 Getting high.

01:07:54.000 Where were you when we were getting high?

01:07:58.000 I'm not sure what I gained from that.

01:08:01.000 There we go.

01:08:02.000 There's your ovaries.

01:08:04.000 Now, women have even less to gain.

01:08:06.000 It's natural for a man to want to fuck everything that moves.

01:08:09.000 That goes back to Genghis Khan and cavemen and all that stuff.

01:08:12.000 It's not natural for a woman to be on her back getting plowed by strangers every night.

01:08:17.000 So I don't understand why you want to extend it.

01:08:20.000 Well, because of my career.

01:08:22.000 Your career sucks.

01:08:25.000 You hate your job.

01:08:27.000 You're not fulfilled.

01:08:28.000 You don't go in on Saturdays.

01:08:29.000 In fact, you're on the elevator at 4.59 on Fridays.

01:08:34.000 You don't like it.

01:08:35.000 I'm not stupid.

01:08:37.000 Uh, bado-bidi-biddy.

01:08:38.000 Let's jump into the Colorado shooting, because that's something we can't put off.

01:08:42.000 Anymo.

01:08:47.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

01:08:52.000 No, that's right.

01:09:01.000 3-0.

01:09:03.000 So Twitter is good and bad in some ways.

01:09:06.000 Like, I see a moron like this top dude, Alan Cole, say, if it was...

01:09:12.000 Wait, move it over here.

01:09:14.000 Please, Brian, get in the habit of moving it over.

01:09:16.000 You can look on your monitor and see what I can and can't read.

01:09:21.000 If every black person purchased an assault rifle and carry it around, sick, carry it around in public like these gun nuts, Republicans would ban guns in minutes.

01:09:31.000 That's the kind of thing you say when you're 13, I think.

01:09:34.000 And then this chick I never heard of before, snarky tea smuggler, goes oops and shows, you know, Maj Touré's thing, black guns matter, and shows us tons of dudes from today with their guns, no one giving a shit, people loving it.

01:09:48.000 No problems, especially with conservatives.

01:09:50.000 Conservatives love Maj Touré and Black Guns Matter.

01:09:54.000 And you go, okay, that's good, because some asshole posts something like that, and then the Freedom of Information Act, the Free Market of Ideas, shows him that he's wrong.

01:10:05.000 And you go, good.

01:10:08.000 But that's not really how it works.

01:10:09.000 Go back.

01:10:12.000 I don't know if he sees her say oops.

01:10:14.000 I know we see her oops, but what does Alex Cole see?

01:10:18.000 Click on the original tweet.

01:10:20.000 And it's just IQ, the alarmingly dull IQ in the dust storm of Twitter is just pathetic.

01:10:29.000 Like they go back to the Black Panthers.

01:10:31.000 You got to go back to the 60s to show the NRA being uptight about blacks with guns.

01:10:36.000 Yeah, sorry we weren't very 2021 in 1969.

01:10:41.000 Secret history of guns.

01:10:42.000 Yep, just about to say the same thing.

01:10:44.000 Nope.

01:10:45.000 Welcome to the Patriot Act, Patriot Wall.

01:10:48.000 And they aren't really assault rifles.

01:10:50.000 You would never give our military an AR-15.

01:10:52.000 Oh, so this is finally someone standing up to them.

01:10:54.000 But then we go back to the late 60s, right?

01:10:58.000 Then back to Ronald Reagan being a racist.

01:11:02.000 And nothing about modern dudes with guns.

01:11:07.000 There's no way that everyone let an organization like the Huey P. Long Club exist.

01:11:12.000 Never mind letting them open, carry, and protest of police murders.

01:11:14.000 Not in Texas, and there they are doing it in Texas.

01:11:18.000 So I mean, I don't really know.

01:11:20.000 Like, did this guy, Alan Cole, get schooled by all these examples?

01:11:24.000 Is he smarter now?

01:11:26.000 Or does he only see the low IQ shit where people go, it's so true.

01:11:30.000 If it was a black guy, none of this would have happened.

01:11:33.000 And that's what we kept seeing with this shooting.

01:11:35.000 Why did, have you noticed it's always the white-skinned guy?

01:11:39.000 They have to say white-skinned now because he was Arab.

01:11:41.000 But they always say, why is it the black guy gets shot when he does any kind of shooting?

01:11:46.000 And the white guys, who are all mass shooters, by the way, they're all white, they always just get a hamburger and get sent home.

01:11:51.000 First of all, the mass shooters are not always white.

01:11:53.000 They're actually disproportionately black.

01:11:55.000 And secondly, the reason that they get taken away peacefully is because they put their hands up.

01:12:01.000 Blacks commit suicide by cop almost every time.

01:12:06.000 When they don't, like the DC snipers, who were Muslim mass murderers.

01:12:11.000 I hate the term the Beltway sniper.

01:12:14.000 It was the Muslim sniper.

01:12:15.000 It was a Muslim and his nephew going around hunting white people for sport.

01:12:21.000 Everything that they pretend the cops do, the Muslim snipers did.

01:12:25.000 And when they were apprehended, they went away peacefully.

01:12:28.000 Or that guy, Emmanuel, what's his name?

01:12:32.000 Who shot up that church?

01:12:33.000 Emmanuel Sampson.

01:12:36.000 He shot up a church in Tennessee.

01:12:38.000 He wanted to kill at least 10 white people.

01:12:40.000 He killed one, shot seven others.

01:12:42.000 He was apprehended.

01:12:43.000 He's in jail now.

01:12:44.000 He's in prison.

01:12:45.000 Because he didn't go, remember that amazing video where the guy crashes his Ford, whatever, his big Ford Lincoln navigator, and he gets out of the thing and he just starts going, walking at the cops.

01:12:59.000 Yeah, you're not going to be taken away peacefully after that.

01:13:03.000 But go to 3-1.

01:13:05.000 No, no, not 3-1 yet.

01:13:09.000 Go to 3-6.

01:13:16.000 I'll bet my salary right now, the shooter in Boulder is a right-wing mega male.

01:13:20.000 Okay, well, people certainly get angry when you bring up that most mass shooters in America are white men, but the statistics show they are.

01:13:26.000 Would have lost my salary on this bet, but most times it's a safe bet that terrorists in America are white males.

01:13:31.000 That's the accepted narrative because white males are the majority of shooters in this country, sort of, if you look at the population.

01:13:40.000 But if you look at how they appear in the race stats, they are alarmingly underrepresented here.

01:13:46.000 Go to 3-7 and look at other...

01:13:49.000 Here's mass killings so far this year.

01:13:52.000 There were seven.

01:13:53.000 All right?

01:13:54.000 You can scroll through them.

01:13:55.000 There was Malik Halfacre.

01:13:58.000 That's the first one in Indiana.

01:14:00.000 He's black.

01:14:01.000 He was mad about the stimulus check.

01:14:03.000 He wanted a stimulus check from everyone in the family and they wouldn't give it to him, so he killed them all.

01:14:07.000 He wanted their share, too.

01:14:09.000 Then there was Jeron Dejan Prigen in Oklahoma.

01:14:13.000 I don't think we have to look him up.

01:14:15.000 Black.

01:14:15.000 There's also Raymond Ronald Lee Childs III.

01:14:20.000 Guess what race he is?

01:14:22.000 There's Sean Lannon, not Sean Lennon.

01:14:24.000 That guy is white.

01:14:25.000 So we have one white guy so far.

01:14:27.000 There's Jason Nightingale, and he was black.

01:14:33.000 Go to 3-8.

01:14:36.000 Is that Emmanuel Sampson?

01:14:39.000 You know what's confusing about, what's this now?

01:14:42.000 3-8?

01:14:43.000 Oh, yeah, no, this is good.

01:14:44.000 Did they kill the white Las Vegas shooter?

01:14:47.000 Yes, they did.

01:14:48.000 Did they kill the white Dayton shooter?

01:14:50.000 Yes, they did.

01:14:51.000 Did the Arab Boston bombers survive?

01:14:53.000 Yes, he did.

01:14:54.000 Did the black D.C. snipers survive?

01:14:56.000 That's when I was just talking about the Muslims.

01:14:58.000 Yes, they did.

01:14:59.000 You know, it is almost as though it could just be down to how the suspect reacts upon arrest, not race.

01:15:06.000 And then show us some math shooters.

01:15:08.000 3-9.

01:15:15.000 So some years most are, and that's still not representational of the population.

01:15:21.000 But some years, you could even pretend that we live in a country that's mostly black because blacks are not just overrepresented as regards to the population, they're overrepresented in the raw numbers, depending on the year.

01:15:36.000 2019, it's looking pretty much 50-50, don't you think?

01:15:41.000 I'm seeing like 60-40.

01:15:43.000 Black, black, as far as white and non-white.

01:15:45.000 Black, black, black, white.

01:15:47.000 Black, black, white.

01:15:49.000 Black, black, black, white.

01:15:51.000 Black, Chinese.

01:15:54.000 White.

01:15:55.000 White.

01:15:56.000 Black, black, white.

01:15:58.000 White, white.

01:16:00.000 Black, black, black, black, black, black, black.

01:16:03.000 And that's out of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7.

01:16:07.000 1, 2, 3, 4.

01:16:08.000 So there's 28 people there.

01:16:10.000 10 are black.

01:16:12.000 So just under half.

01:16:15.000 And then that's not including this chair.

01:16:18.000 So yeah, I was right.

01:16:19.000 50-50.

01:16:20.000 Detective Shitty, could you pull up that thing again?

01:16:33.000 All right, so Amy Siskins.

01:16:34.000 So remember, she said it's all white males, and then she got caught saying, well, let's not say his name because he has a Muslim name.

01:16:42.000 So Tucker made fun of her.

01:16:45.000 And now, 3-1, she's out to get him.

01:16:48.000 I used to be her number one enemy.

01:16:50.000 Now there's a new kid in town.

01:16:52.000 What happened to Rudy Giuliani?

01:16:53.000 Kind of amazing how quickly so many from the former guy...

01:16:56.000 Remember yesterday, they don't say his name.

01:16:58.000 No.

01:16:58.000 The former guy's regime.

01:17:00.000 But our work is not done.

01:17:02.000 We killed Trump.

01:17:03.000 We killed Rudy Giuliani, but we need to kill Tucker.

01:17:06.000 Now, she meant to say, we need to detoxify the disinformation and propaganda like the lying, inciting hosts of Fox News.

01:17:14.000 Start with this white supremacist dog whistler.

01:17:17.000 Oh, sorry, make that a foghorn.

01:17:18.000 Tucker Carlson.

01:17:20.000 Now, this is something that John Oliver did that has 6 million views, where he breaks down exactly how Tucker Carlson is a white supremacist.

01:17:29.000 I am going to go through this, but it's going to take an hour and a half.

01:17:32.000 So we won't put it on today's show, but I'll release it tomorrow as a censor.tv presents.

01:17:37.000 But this takedown is utter horseshit.

01:17:39.000 And I'll explain briefly.

01:17:41.000 His logic is Tucker Carlson is a Nazi because white supremacists like him.

01:17:46.000 So they agree with him.

01:17:48.000 And anyone who agrees with Nazis or who Nazis agree with is the same.

01:17:53.000 And then towards the end, he says that David Duke says that when Tucker says Western, He means white.

01:18:02.000 John Oliver says the same thing.

01:18:04.000 In other words, Nazis agree with John Oliver's.

01:18:07.000 John Oliver.

01:18:08.000 In other words, by John Oliver's logic, John Oliver is a Nazi.

01:18:13.000 You're a Nazi if Nazis agree with you.

01:18:15.000 David Duke agrees with John Oliver that West means white.

01:18:24.000 This is the thing about the left.

01:18:25.000 They're not sending their best.

01:18:26.000 Their arguments are shit.

01:18:28.000 And their demagogues, their heroes are fucking retards.

01:18:32.000 You could have an aneurysm on a toilet.

01:18:34.000 You never know.

01:18:36.000 But yeah, it's not black or Asian, as I said earlier.

01:18:39.000 But that's not to say black on Asian crime isn't existing.

01:18:42.000 In fact, this one was big.

01:18:46.000 Sorry, 3-3.

01:18:48.000 Ladies, if you're getting carjacked, get the fuck out of the way.

01:18:52.000 We can get your car back.

01:18:53.000 It's going to be crashing into a pole.

01:18:54.000 Look at her.

01:18:55.000 She's holding on to it.

01:18:57.000 Boom.

01:18:59.000 But now.

01:19:02.000 Someone's going back to her.

01:19:04.000 She's got no shoes on.

01:19:06.000 Look her face just ricocheted off the rope.

01:19:08.000 It's only what the fuck when what's supposed to happen happens.

01:19:12.000 Like her hanging up with the car.

01:19:13.000 Maybe because they see so many stupid action movies.

01:19:16.000 What is she going to do?

01:19:17.000 Rip him out of the car and then get her car back?

01:19:19.000 Yeah, that's going to work.

01:19:20.000 That's the what the fuck part.

01:19:21.000 How could they do that?

01:19:23.000 But go down with the tweet.

01:19:26.000 That's the guy.

01:19:27.000 Now, this is in the tweet.

01:19:28.000 It took me forever to find this guy, not on Twitter, because I first read this on a news source.

01:19:33.000 And it was like, a man broke into a car.

01:19:38.000 And there she is.

01:19:41.000 Bruised eye.

01:19:42.000 Ladies, please, don't Heather hire it up.

01:19:46.000 Don't get in there and take away the, beat up the Nazis, take out the criminals.

01:19:51.000 It's not going to happen.

01:19:52.000 You're going to lose.

01:19:53.000 Wait, go up.

01:19:55.000 Is that the woman who said nick?

01:19:57.000 I want us to be authentic.

01:19:58.000 Okay?

01:19:59.000 And when we don't engage with the people who are like, when we keep hiring consultants to do meetings for us, what ends up happening is because they don't have those relationships with community members, they end up relying on folks who do to do those things.

01:20:14.000 Yeah, she's the one who said that.

01:20:16.000 A lot of Asians are fake-ass house niggas.

01:20:19.000 Yeah.

01:20:20.000 Remember?

01:20:21.000 Let me see.

01:20:21.000 Is that her?

01:20:24.000 Yeah, Allison Collins.

01:20:26.000 Oh, would you look at that?

01:20:27.000 Would you just look at this?

01:20:29.000 She calls Asians house niggas.

01:20:30.000 She goes, a house nigga still a nigga.

01:20:33.000 All right.

01:20:36.000 Yeah, this is.

01:20:38.000 Go to 3-5.

01:20:41.000 3-5.

01:20:46.000 If you see this, if you're with your kids and you see this, grab your kids and run.

01:20:52.000 Get behind cover and not like not drywall.

01:20:56.000 Get behind something solid stone like the bar.

01:20:59.000 If you're alone and you're armed and you have a gun, then maybe be a good citizen.

01:21:04.000 Be prepared to stand up and fight and protect people.

01:21:08.000 But if you're not armed, and if you're not armed, just get the fuck out of there.

01:21:13.000 If you're not armed and you're with your family, go run and hide, hold your kids, put your body over their body.

01:21:19.000 But these people see black men of a certain age about to throw down and they think it's funny.

01:21:25.000 Have you not noticed a pattern yet?

01:21:41.000 I would even make the argument people laughing at them on the sidelines, they see that.

01:21:45.000 That gives them the, they want to step it up.

01:21:47.000 They want to be like, I'm going to fucking joke.

01:21:48.000 I'm going to kill.

01:21:49.000 People are laughing at us.

01:21:50.000 I want to show this on some real shit.

01:21:52.000 Right.

01:21:57.000 Damn, what the fuck?

01:22:00.000 This is a screen.

01:22:21.000 Are you surprised?

01:22:22.000 If you're not comfortable with senseless violence breaking out at any moment, don't use Ebonics because you're not about that life.

01:22:28.000 If you're not ready to end your life and your entire future over ignorant shit that doesn't matter, don't use Ebonics.

01:22:34.000 You remind me of Nick Fuentes saying, stop saying red-pilled if you're not racist or sexist.

01:22:38.000 Yeah.

01:22:38.000 That's our word.

01:22:38.000 That's our shit.

01:22:39.000 It's for us racist.

01:22:40.000 Oh, no, sexist.

01:22:41.000 Based.

01:22:41.000 Yeah.

01:22:41.000 Oh, based.

01:22:42.000 And for that reason, I still say based.

01:22:45.000 And that's.

01:22:46.000 Oh, look, someone was at the shooting.

01:22:48.000 Say what?

01:22:52.000 Let's give him a call.

01:22:53.000 I couldn't call that chick.

01:23:19.000 Half an hour ago.

01:23:23.000 He's not answering.

01:23:28.000 I gotta make sure I don't reveal his name.

01:23:35.000 Hi, you've reached Don Chusterlin, Ideal Illegal Arms.

01:23:38.000 Hi.

01:23:40.000 Okay, hopefully he'll call back while we're doing the mailbag.

01:23:44.000 He said it was pretty uneventful, though.

01:23:46.000 As far as mass shootings go, it wasn't very exciting.

01:23:55.000 Okay, okay.

01:23:57.000 I'm gonna come.

01:23:59.000 Yellow?

01:24:02.000 Hey, what's up?

01:24:03.000 What's up, dude?

01:24:05.000 Hello.

01:24:06.000 How's it going?

01:24:07.000 Good.

01:24:07.000 So, how was the mass shooting?

01:24:10.000 Oh, you know, it was honestly way more boring than I wished it was, to be honest.

01:24:15.000 Now that, like, I realize how big of a national story it was, it was super boring.

01:24:21.000 So, did you get out of the parking lot, or you just were going to go into the store from your car and you heard, cut, cut, cut, cut?

01:24:28.000 I'm so bold.

01:24:29.000 So, I was Just got out of my car.

01:24:31.000 I was kind of, because I was listening to music and shit in my car, so it was loud and I wasn't really paying attention.

01:24:36.000 So I got out and I see the Tam car crash into the front of the building.

01:24:42.000 And then I see Homie walking up the ramp.

01:24:46.000 And then I'm kind of walking around and I still don't really know what's up.

01:24:49.000 I thought the dude just crashed and people were going over to him because then people were making a big deal because some dude just flew through the parking lot and crashed into the side of the building.

01:24:58.000 But then I walked over to some other dude and said, I think there's an active shooter.

01:25:02.000 And then we just hear boom, boom.

01:25:04.000 And then that dude just goes running off like a little bitch.

01:25:08.000 And then...

01:25:09.000 Wait, I don't think he's a little bitch if he's running from a mass shooting.

01:25:14.000 Nah, dude.

01:25:15.000 We were way far away.

01:25:16.000 We're at like the other end of the lot.

01:25:17.000 Like, this dude was inside.

01:25:18.000 We're like, we're not even in any danger.

01:25:21.000 Trust me.

01:25:22.000 So you just, you sat there for a while watching the cops show up and everything and then went home?

01:25:28.000 Yeah.

01:25:29.000 So the cops were probably like, I don't know, maybe like five minutes after I got there.

01:25:33.000 And then probably like four cars just line up right in front of like the entrance and like eight dudes just hop out with a riot shield and just storm the front of the building and they all walk in.

01:25:45.000 And so I'm just kind of watching like, what the fuck?

01:25:48.000 And I saw my cat in my fucking car because I had just had him there anyway.

01:25:53.000 And then you drive around with your cat in the car?

01:25:58.000 Yeah, well, just this, I mean, this one particular time, I just threw him in the car because he don't like to fuck fuck out the windshield and shit.

01:26:04.000 So sometimes when he's at the door, when I'm walking out, I'll pick him up and throw him in because I'll just run it down to the grocery store.

01:26:08.000 And what were you going to get at the grocery store?

01:26:10.000 I'm going to get in the car with me.

01:26:11.000 What were you going to get?

01:26:12.000 Cat food.

01:26:13.000 Cat food.

01:26:14.000 Oh, he'd be excited to hear about that.

01:26:17.000 Yeah, yeah, exactly.

01:26:19.000 And then so I'm chilling there, and then eventually some bitch comes over, like some cop, and she's screaming her head off.

01:26:25.000 And then I don't know how much of the coverage you've seen, but there's some lady, this like Mexican lady who's screaming her fucking head off on every interview.

01:26:33.000 Yeah, and she's like, get back.

01:26:34.000 It's for your safety.

01:26:37.000 Yeah.

01:26:37.000 So that lady was, I was like one of the first people she came to because I was like standing like right there.

01:26:43.000 And she's like, get into people's houses.

01:26:46.000 Go, go.

01:26:46.000 She sent like two people that were standing near me right into somebody's apartment.

01:26:50.000 There was like two people standing on their patio.

01:26:53.000 And then there was like people kind of by me standing on like, I guess like kind of the curb lawn, like the grass next to the curb.

01:27:01.000 And so these people ran across the street into these random people's house.

01:27:04.000 So I guess that was a weird fucking day for them.

01:27:06.000 And then I'm like, my car's right there.

01:27:08.000 And she's like, go, get in your car.

01:27:10.000 Go, go, go.

01:27:12.000 And then so I'm like, alrighty then.

01:27:14.000 Wow.

01:27:15.000 All right.

01:27:16.000 Well, thanks for your update, sir.

01:27:17.000 Are you a little more wary of Muslims now?

01:27:21.000 No, I mean, I'm usually pretty wary.

01:27:24.000 That's obviously, we, this, we're in a community that's like 99.999% white.

01:27:29.000 This dude apparently drove up from Arvada, which is like a suburb.

01:27:33.000 We're a suburb of Denver too, but this is like a suburb on the other side.

01:27:36.000 So it's like 45 minutes away from us.

01:27:39.000 And apparently he just hopped on 93.

01:27:42.000 And 93 is a road where there's basically nothing.

01:27:45.000 It just runs along the mountainside.

01:27:47.000 And we're like the first town that you hit on 93.

01:27:49.000 So he drove up from this random ass town.

01:27:52.000 And we're like, that's the first, we're in South Boulder.

01:27:55.000 So we're like on the edge of town.

01:27:56.000 So like we're the first shopping center.

01:27:58.000 And he just turned in randomly and just started shooting the place up.

01:28:01.000 So maybe he was out here.

01:28:02.000 Maybe he was hunting whites.

01:28:05.000 Maybe he was.

01:28:06.000 That's what I'm saying.

01:28:07.000 I don't really know what he was doing.

01:28:08.000 But what's funny is the second I said on the news, I'm like, that dude looks like he's like an Israeli or something.

01:28:14.000 There's no white dude that's like five foot five, like short as hell like that with the curly ass hair.

01:28:20.000 Yeah.

01:28:21.000 Yeah.

01:28:22.000 All right, man.

01:28:23.000 That's my story.

01:28:24.000 Great story.

01:28:24.000 Thanks for calling.

01:28:25.000 It's on the show tonight.

01:28:27.000 All right, cool, cool.

01:28:28.000 Peace out.

01:28:29.000 Peace.

01:28:30.000 Peace, peace.

01:28:34.000 Let's start the mailbag.

01:28:38.000 Ryan, shut up.

01:28:40.000 You don't have a dad.

01:28:43.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.

01:28:49.000 Let me touch it.

01:28:51.000 This is a scene from Steve Coogan's comedy Hamlet 2.

01:28:55.000 Regular scene is first.

01:28:57.000 This better be good, dude.

01:29:00.000 And then he has a musical scene second.

01:29:01.000 I have so much anger.

01:29:03.000 I feel like I've been raped in the face.

01:29:09.000 That's good.

01:29:11.000 And then musical scene.

01:29:16.000 Sometimes I feel like I'm drifting in space.

01:29:24.000 I think my heart soul is falling from rest.

01:29:31.000 Therapy.

01:29:33.000 Taken me to a better place.

01:29:37.000 Oh, why do I feel?

01:29:40.000 Why do I feel?

01:29:43.000 Why do I feel?

01:29:49.000 Weak in the face?

01:29:51.000 Maybe it's buried in the face.

01:29:53.000 Okay, fun stuff.

01:29:55.000 I remember that movie being really good.

01:29:59.000 G-Dog and Lord of the Fag Zone, how was a baboom not immediately elevated to a video drop?

01:30:05.000 True.

01:30:06.000 He says, don't read my name on air, please.

01:30:08.000 And his name is Mike Hunt.

01:30:13.000 Baboom.

01:30:15.000 That is.

01:30:16.000 I'm a Derek Dew behind the current show.

01:30:18.000 Knowing my luck, this has already been sent and is ancient Chinese secret.

01:30:21.000 But if you need to know, this is here is a David Bob video sketch.

01:30:25.000 Dude, this is the song we played on the fucking show and then immediately said, this is not the song, but can you help us find the song that's a parody of Toby Keith's Red, White, and Blue?

01:30:41.000 As in order to have a placeholder, we had All I Need and we aired that on the fucking show.

01:30:47.000 But I played the video and then I said, this is what we're looking for.

01:30:51.000 Meaning not this song.

01:30:52.000 And then people send me the same fucking song.

01:30:55.000 So I say, hey, I'm looking for a black thing that's this.

01:30:58.000 It's actually a deck of Cards, it looks like this.

01:31:01.000 This is an iPhone, it's not this.

01:31:02.000 And they go, Do you mean an iPhone?

01:31:07.000 No, this is about the fourth time we've received the fucking all-I need thing.

01:31:13.000 That's not the song.

01:31:14.000 By the way, you could have pulled it up at any point.

01:31:16.000 Why are you pulling up new software?

01:31:19.000 What do you mean?

01:31:20.000 What are making a drop?

01:31:21.000 I'm making two drops.

01:31:22.000 No, don't make drops live on the show, you absolute retard.

01:31:26.000 You find your moments.

01:31:27.000 It takes two seconds, but yeah.

01:31:29.000 No, it doesn't.

01:31:29.000 Ryan, don't do other work.

01:31:31.000 You don't do anything.

01:31:32.000 We've had a lagging problem for months now.

01:31:34.000 And now, live during the show, you're making drops?

01:31:37.000 I've been doing it.

01:31:38.000 Are you a mental patient?

01:31:39.000 Go back to the previous email.

01:31:42.000 Nope.

01:31:43.000 Oh, and you want to see the old country music?

01:31:45.000 Yeah, the thing I'm talking about right now while you make drops and open new software.

01:31:49.000 Your whole thing is we've seen this so many times.

01:31:51.000 Right, but the people who don't know what I'm talking about should know that's the song I'm talking about.

01:31:55.000 Anyway, next.

01:31:57.000 Please don't do your homework in class, kids.

01:32:01.000 Hi, Gavin.

01:32:01.000 You're spot on about this ridiculous habit of hiring Europeans to play Americans.

01:32:05.000 In movies, I was watching this Netflix movie, Devil All the Time, a neo-North thriller set in rural Ohio after World War II.

01:32:11.000 It might be a good movie.

01:32:12.000 I wouldn't know.

01:32:12.000 I was so distracted by the cast of Effet Europeans prancing around in immaculate gingham, pretending to be Ohio natives.

01:32:21.000 Look at this mess.

01:32:23.000 And it's Bill Skarsgaard, Tom Holland, Robert Patterson, Sebastian San, Romanian, Australian, Jason Clark, English, Harry Melling.

01:32:34.000 All right, here's some Valley Girls, just as uncomfortable, though.

01:32:37.000 Wait, he doesn't say the movie, does he?

01:32:40.000 Yeah, devil all the time.

01:32:41.000 So could you pull that up, please?

01:32:43.000 Don't open it.

01:32:45.000 You shouldn't have to wait for me to.

01:32:46.000 I clicked the link he sent, but yeah.

01:32:48.000 He didn't send a link.

01:32:50.000 No, you're clicking a link that's not related, Ryan.

01:32:52.000 Read the fucking article.

01:32:59.000 This was your daddy's.

01:33:04.000 Brought back from the war.

01:33:07.000 I'm from Ohio.

01:33:12.000 Figure it's time to pass it on.

01:33:17.000 This is the best present I ever got.

01:33:19.000 Thank you.

01:33:25.000 And people from two points on a map without even a straight line between them can be connected is at the heart of our story and knock them stiff.

01:33:35.000 You ever think about how we ended up orphans living in the same house?

01:33:39.000 I don't know what wonders you did.

01:33:41.000 This isn't as bad as what I showed.

01:33:43.000 This looks good.

01:33:44.000 These all seem okay.

01:33:45.000 I've seen this before.

01:33:45.000 I've seen the trailer.

01:33:46.000 It looks good.

01:33:47.000 Some people would say it's just no mark.

01:33:50.000 You take pictures?

01:33:52.000 I do.

01:33:52.000 I see a smile pretty enough to photograph, that is.

01:33:56.000 Others would tell you it was God's plan.

01:33:59.000 Blessed are they hunger and thirst for righteousness.

01:34:04.000 I'm not a big Ohio expert, but do they sound that southern?

01:34:08.000 I think of it as the Midwest.

01:34:10.000 Howdy, boys.

01:34:13.000 Maha.

01:34:14.000 That ain't no preacher.

01:34:15.000 He's as bad as they got on the damn radio.

01:34:18.000 When people look back on him, they had no other choice.

01:34:23.000 Anyway, Ryan sucks at his job.

01:34:26.000 Tell me about it.

01:34:26.000 I could do better.

01:34:27.000 Love him.

01:34:28.000 But Googling isn't that hard.

01:34:30.000 There's more than Googling.

01:34:32.000 There's more than Googling.

01:34:32.000 Yeah, my boy, being a New Yorker, are you familiar with Bannerman Island and the castle upon which it sits?

01:34:37.000 If not, it was owned, built in the early 1900s by Francis Bannerman the Six, who ran an army surplus store in the city.

01:34:43.000 Being a cheap Scotsman that he was, he built the castle using concrete paste that sealed the crates of guns and field gear he purchased.

01:34:51.000 The paste held up just long enough to withstand shipment around the world, but did not make great building material.

01:34:56.000 And today, the castle is in ruins.

01:34:58.000 I was wondering if you've had similar tastes of frugality during your entrepreneurial endeavors.

01:35:05.000 Where is this castle?

01:35:06.000 It's full of snakes.

01:35:07.000 It's right where I live on the Hudson Valley, where my grandparents live.

01:35:13.000 Is that the one that's for sale for like $5 million?

01:35:16.000 Oh, no, no, that's not it.

01:35:17.000 You pass by it if you go on the train to Poughkeepsie.

01:35:22.000 I love it.

01:35:23.000 I love it.

01:35:24.000 It's made of spackle.

01:35:28.000 That's really cool.

01:35:30.000 They used to do tours on it or something.

01:35:32.000 People just go there, but I think you're not allowed to.

01:35:36.000 But you just go there.

01:35:37.000 Fun.

01:35:40.000 I just has a lot of fun.

01:35:41.000 This is from Doug.

01:35:41.000 Holy fuck, Aroney.

01:35:43.000 I had to tap out of your expose on that future child murder and her pre-op tranny.

01:35:47.000 Fast forward is a wonderful thing.

01:35:49.000 Maybe in the future you can just hit some highlights and save the audience a little misery.

01:35:52.000 Love all you guys do.

01:35:53.000 Well, except for that.

01:35:57.000 I'm sorry, but I thoroughly enjoyed that red, wine, and blue.

01:36:00.000 In fact, I showed my wife and she was mortified.

01:36:04.000 The left is often criticized for its Stalinist tactics, but the Stasi, the secret police of the German Democratic Republic, i.e.

01:36:11.000 East Germany, might be a lot more apt.

01:36:14.000 Check this out.

01:36:15.000 10 terrifying facts about the East German secret police.

01:36:19.000 Okay, good to know.

01:36:24.000 Oh, let's go back to the beginning here.

01:36:26.000 I'm going to tell my kids this was Dr. Rachel Levine, the first trans Secretary of Health and Human Services.

01:36:31.000 You know what's funny?

01:36:32.000 This guy played a lunatic in the movie who was like a mad genius.

01:36:38.000 And I look at him and I feel more respect and trust than I do with our Secretary of Health and Human Services.

01:36:46.000 Like, understanding that that's an actor.

01:36:48.000 You know what I mean?

01:36:50.000 That's data from Star Trek.

01:36:51.000 But that character, at least I knew that he was a brilliant scientist.

01:36:56.000 I don't see that when I see, what's his name?

01:36:58.000 Richard Cohen Leville Levin or whatever his fucking name is.

01:37:03.000 Ante Levin.

01:37:07.000 Check this shit out.

01:37:08.000 The Hunter Biden scandals always seem so unbelievable, so it's not hard for the media to brush them under the rug.

01:37:12.000 But this dude's a piece of work.

01:37:14.000 Oh, and this is going around the news today.

01:37:16.000 I'm glad the mailbag caught this and I forgot.

01:37:19.000 Secret Service agents intervened in Hunter Biden gun incident.

01:37:23.000 Yeah, so the Secret Service went to the gun store where he bought his gun and wanted the records of it.

01:37:28.000 They want to confiscate His records.

01:37:30.000 And he said, no, thanks.

01:37:31.000 I'm going to hold on to them just in case the gun that he bought here is used for a crime and you guys try to cover it up.

01:37:41.000 So that's juicy.

01:37:42.000 But I guess that's Russian disinformation.

01:37:45.000 This is from Tommy.

01:37:46.000 Look at this fucking loser.

01:37:48.000 He comes in around 1:15.

01:38:00.000 Yeah, I put him on my parlor.

01:38:04.000 Isn't it weird how new his tattoos look?

01:38:07.000 They look totally like those fake kid sticker ones.

01:38:10.000 His face is like the neighbors that don't take down their Halloween decorations.

01:38:14.000 And it's like January.

01:38:17.000 Yeah, he's going around.

01:38:19.000 If you follow Andy No's Twitter, you'll see him.

01:38:22.000 Broken, yeah.

01:38:23.000 True.

01:38:28.000 Hello.

01:38:30.000 I'm the front man of a Montreal garage band called Light Bulb Alley.

01:38:33.000 Well, you just lost your fucking career, my friend.

01:38:36.000 Just that quick.

01:38:37.000 Hope you enjoyed being the front man for a Montreal garage band called Light Bulb Alley because it just ended.

01:38:45.000 Isn't light bulb one word?

01:38:48.000 Am I stupid?

01:38:49.000 Maybe they took liberties.

01:38:59.000 Is it a light bulb or a light bulb?

01:39:06.000 No, it's a light bulb.

01:39:08.000 Wait, is it two words or one word?

01:39:09.000 I'm seeing both.

01:39:15.000 Of course, I have to do these things.

01:39:18.000 It's two words.

01:39:21.000 Yes, it's two words.

01:39:22.000 Anyway, we formed in 07.

01:39:24.000 I'm the only original member.

01:39:25.000 I'm from Yellowknife.

01:39:27.000 I've been in Montreal for 15 years.

01:39:28.000 We're influenced by Montreal bands like Bloodshot Bill, blah, blah, blah, CBC Gangbangs.

01:39:32.000 Oh, I forgot all about CBC Gangbangs.

01:39:35.000 The Space Shits.

01:39:37.000 Just talking to one of the Space Shits right now.

01:39:39.000 King Con.

01:39:40.000 By the way, the Space Shits in King Con used to hang around at our vice offices when they were children.

01:39:46.000 Like 14, 13, 15.

01:39:48.000 And then they formed those bands.

01:39:50.000 The Space Shits and King Con and Chrome.

01:39:55.000 Dave One and his little brother A-Track would come by.

01:39:58.000 I remember their parents were really strict Jewish parents and he'd never seen porno before, pornographic magazines before he came by.

01:40:05.000 I remember Dave One just going, holy shit, man.

01:40:07.000 He was like a real wigger back then and would wear wrap clothes and a sideways baseball hat and stuff.

01:40:13.000 So we discovered those bands and created them.

01:40:16.000 I also dig bands like Black Lips.

01:40:17.000 We morphed into something else, blah, blah, blah.

01:40:19.000 I'm listening to Gavin since 2016.

01:40:21.000 I have a one-year-old daughter, another butt in the oven.

01:40:24.000 I work construction now.

01:40:25.000 Save money and get up early.

01:40:26.000 Thanks for the influence.

01:40:27.000 Do you think there's any claim to some territory in the mainstream for hardcore truth without being canceled or censored?

01:40:31.000 No, and you're about to find out the hard way.

01:40:34.000 Is the mainstream too convoluted to allow truth?

01:40:37.000 Yes, it is.

01:40:39.000 I think the two most important ways to unravel the COVID scandal are the PCR fraud and the irresponsible banning of hydroxychloroquine.

01:40:47.000 Please play our music as much as you want.

01:40:49.000 The only thing's manufactured in the U.S. are the elections now.

01:40:51.000 Alistair Booth.

01:40:53.000 I guess I got to say his name.

01:40:54.000 He already said he's a front man.

01:40:55.000 And then he's got a bunch of videos from his band.

01:41:01.000 Huh.

01:41:07.000 Let me see.

01:41:08.000 We got any of his band?

01:41:09.000 You already played that, right?

01:41:10.000 No, there's a new one.

01:41:11.000 Pepper Spray.

01:41:29.000 That's good to know.

01:41:30.000 I remember these guys.

01:41:31.000 They have reading something about that.

01:41:34.000 They have a cool music video, and I forget which one it is, but I can put this under music in my own personal emails.

01:41:41.000 All right, last email.

01:41:43.000 I actually imagined if the races were reversed, he says.

01:41:48.000 Cool.

01:41:48.000 Let's see what happens if the races were reversed.

01:41:58.000 Can you imagine if the races were reversed?

01:42:02.000 That's awesome.

01:42:03.000 That was beautiful.

01:42:04.000 All right, let's get to the final video.

01:42:23.000 Ladies, you're wasting your time being sluts, letting your wombs die, doing coke in the bathroom.

01:42:31.000 You fucked up.

01:42:32.000 And you're going to look back on your slut years and go, what was I doing?

01:42:36.000 What did I eat?

01:42:38.000 And here's a good example of that with 4-9.

01:42:42.000 And don't let your eyes leave her boyfriend's or sorry, husband's face, especially at the end.

01:42:50.000 Like this.

01:42:51.000 You know, we took a marriage like this.

01:42:53.000 You know, we took vows and ultimately I defiled them in every way possible.

01:42:58.000 I've had a lot of inappropriate relationships with men, with women, a lot of men, a lot of women.

01:43:04.000 I was fucking.

01:43:05.000 I was sucking.

01:43:06.000 I was in bars, cars, closets, trains, basically.

01:43:12.000 I mean, shit, I had a couple rents on me.

01:43:14.000 I'm a runner.

01:43:15.000 I'm a track star.

01:43:16.000 All of that.

01:43:16.000 Like, it was bad.

01:43:18.000 And I'm not proud of it.

01:43:20.000 And I want to publicly apologize for my choices and my decisions.

01:43:25.000 You know, I was eating ass.

01:43:27.000 And I don't even do that for my husband.

01:43:30.000 So I don't know.

01:43:32.000 I take full accountability.

01:43:34.000 It's not something that's because of my family.

01:43:38.000 Get fired.

01:43:38.000 Get in trouble.

01:43:39.000 Be brave.

01:43:40.000 And never stop fighting.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - March 25, 2021

S03E90 - JULIA TAUSCH‘S DEAD WOMB

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