Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S03E95

00:00:28.000 What's the next line in that song, Dad?

00:00:30.000 It's Saturday night.

00:00:32.000 No.

00:00:33.000 I, I, I, I. Gotta go.

00:00:40.000 Aye, ay, ay, ay.

00:00:43.000 Gotta go?

00:00:44.000 Nope.

00:00:47.000 Maybe we should have.

00:00:50.000 I don't know what it is.

00:00:51.000 I was gonna say it's something horribly racist that would have cost us this entire website and ruined a show.

00:00:58.000 That's the unfortunate thing.

00:01:00.000 Wait a minute.

00:01:00.000 Have I got the wrong newspaper?

00:01:01.000 Yeah.

00:01:02.000 It's not air of his days.

00:01:04.000 It's do as I say, not as I pay with Biden.

00:01:09.000 Yeah, the Bay City Rollers from Edinburgh.

00:01:12.000 And you guys see the people, by the way, welcome back.

00:01:15.000 Jeremy McInnes, my father, made me.

00:01:17.000 He's coming in from Scotland again.

00:01:22.000 The Glaswegians, who are called Ouija's, see Edinburgh's, which are called burgers, people from Edinburgh, as wimps.

00:01:30.000 Well, we see them as snobs.

00:01:31.000 They look down on Glaswegians.

00:01:33.000 So it's maybe Manhattan, and Glasgow is like Newark?

00:01:39.000 Oh, Manhattan and the Bronx.

00:01:42.000 I see.

00:01:43.000 You're from the South Bronx, the Boogie Down Bronx.

00:01:47.000 Today's book.

00:01:50.000 My lawyer gave this to me.

00:01:51.000 Not Ron Coleman, a different guy, immigration lawyer.

00:01:54.000 The Five Books of Moses, an easy-to-read Torah in simple translations.

00:01:58.000 Wait, I just saw some Nazis.

00:02:00.000 Oh, no, Nazirite.

00:02:05.000 They have a word called Nazi right in this book.

00:02:08.000 This is something I probably should read.

00:02:10.000 I probably should know about it.

00:02:13.000 When am I ever going to get around to reading the Torah?

00:02:16.000 Have you read the Quran?

00:02:18.000 Yes.

00:02:18.000 The whole thing?

00:02:19.000 Well, not quite.

00:02:21.000 What I did was I read a book.

00:02:23.000 What's a book?

00:02:28.000 And the book talked about the various passages in Quran.

00:02:32.000 So I had an English translation of the Quran, and I would look up the Quran to ensure, yes, that was the exact passage.

00:02:42.000 Right.

00:02:44.000 Yeah.

00:02:44.000 Tommy Robinson's read the Quran.

00:02:46.000 Didn't you say it starts out kind of groovy?

00:02:50.000 Because he was a wandering guy at the beginning, then he became a warlord, and it became...

00:02:55.000 Yes.

00:02:56.000 And yes, when he moved from Mecca to Medina, in Mecca, he loved the Jews.

00:03:07.000 Everything was wonderful.

00:03:09.000 And then when he ended up, he was kicked out of Mecca because they thought he was a nutcase.

00:03:14.000 Ended up in Medina, and that's when he became a warlord.

00:03:18.000 That's when he out conquering God knows how many countries.

00:03:21.000 And that's when you get smite ye above your necks and convert or die.

00:03:25.000 Yes.

00:03:26.000 And then what happens is the people who are trying to make, you know, the left who keep making out that there's no such thing as an Islamic terrorist, they always quote the passages from the Quran that are from the Mecca days.

00:03:43.000 Right.

00:03:44.000 Not the Medina days.

00:03:46.000 Right.

00:03:47.000 Could you clear your throat?

00:03:48.000 I think I hear spit gargling around in the back there.

00:03:50.000 Well, maybe I've got COVID.

00:03:56.000 Speaking of Jews in the Torah, I wanted to discuss the Jews.

00:04:00.000 It's a taboo subject.

00:04:01.000 But yesterday I was at my local pub and a Jewish man came in.

00:04:05.000 And dad thinks I'm paranoid, but I think he had an agenda.

00:04:09.000 I think someone told him that I frequent this place, so he decided to come in.

00:04:13.000 He was acting very foreign when he got in.

00:04:16.000 He was looking around.

00:04:17.000 He wasn't sitting at the table.

00:04:18.000 That reeked of agenda.

00:04:20.000 I don't think I know why.

00:04:27.000 Instant classic.

00:04:28.000 Instant classic.

00:04:29.000 He wasn't settling in.

00:04:31.000 And the chosen ones are not known for their ability to hold their booze.

00:04:37.000 And this is an Irish bar, and especially with new people, they're very generous.

00:04:41.000 They tend to overserve.

00:04:43.000 That's why I think I'm in trouble because of the bartenders there being too generous.

00:04:48.000 And people buying too many rounds.

00:04:51.000 There's a lot of like, can you get him?

00:04:53.000 And then I can't remember.

00:04:54.000 I've been conditioned in America to no longer buy rounds.

00:04:59.000 It takes about five years.

00:05:01.000 And then you go, I get it now, all for one, one for all.

00:05:03.000 And then you go to this pub and they're like, get him and get him and get him.

00:05:06.000 And now I got to unlearn all this and remember that I OPJ a Jim Beam.

00:05:12.000 But anyway, so they're overserving him.

00:05:15.000 And then I think he started to lose it.

00:05:17.000 And I overheard him say, just remember, we've been here for 5,000 years.

00:05:23.000 Meaning, we've been around.

00:05:26.000 Meaning, don't hate Jews.

00:05:27.000 We're actually better than you, which is a weird argument.

00:05:30.000 And if you do want to take that argument, China's culture is, what, 40,000 years old?

00:05:35.000 So are they eight times better than Jews?

00:05:40.000 Trust China.

00:05:40.000 China is asshole.

00:05:42.000 What about Africa?

00:05:44.000 It's 250,000 years old.

00:05:47.000 They win.

00:05:49.000 By far.

00:05:50.000 The Congo wins.

00:05:55.000 And then he was criticizing my dad's hat.

00:05:58.000 He thought it was a MAGA hat.

00:06:00.000 Now, he didn't have this particular hat on.

00:06:02.000 This is a costume we use to be hyperbolic, just to break down the fourth wall.

00:06:05.000 But he did have a red hat that said New Smyrna Beach, where he has a place in Florida.

00:06:10.000 And the guy said, ah, you can love Trump all you want with your red hat.

00:06:16.000 And then dad goes, well, it says New Smyrna Beach on it.

00:06:20.000 It doesn't even look like a MAGA hat.

00:06:22.000 No.

00:06:24.000 And he goes, and then he says, and Trump didn't invent red hats, you know.

00:06:28.000 Because at this point, he was pissed.

00:06:32.000 And I, see, I wouldn't have been able to resist arguing.

00:06:35.000 I didn't take the bait, but if he had approached me or something, I would have tore into him.

00:06:40.000 And I think that's what he was going for.

00:06:42.000 But you just kept screaming about how fantastic Biden is and how we've finally been saved.

00:06:47.000 That's what's the rationale there?

00:06:50.000 People are below you?

00:06:51.000 He's not worth it?

00:06:53.000 Well, I don't know.

00:06:54.000 Well, I don't know.

00:06:56.000 I heard the other day that Dr. Joe and Joe Biden went for dinner at a very fancy restaurant.

00:07:04.000 And the waiter came up to Dr. Joe and she ordered a steak and fries.

00:07:12.000 And the waiter said, well, what about the vegetable?

00:07:14.000 And she said, oh, he'll help the lobster.

00:07:19.000 Did you hear that a Jewish guy, a Chinaman and a black guy, walked into an Irish bar in the South Bronx.

00:07:27.000 They come in and the Jewish guy goes, I'll just get a white wine, thanks.

00:07:31.000 And the black guy says, I think I'll get a pint of Guinness.

00:07:35.000 And the Chinaman goes, I think I'll just get a shot.

00:07:38.000 Do you have Jim Beam?

00:07:40.000 And the bartender looked at the three of them and he said, what the fuck you guys doing here?

00:07:43.000 Get out of here.

00:07:48.000 But I have a theory.

00:07:50.000 My theory is that brontosaurs are very small at one end, then get big in the middle, and then are skinny at the other end.

00:07:55.000 Well, that's the one about, I think it was a Portuguese person, an Irish person, and a Scotsman going to a bar.

00:08:07.000 And the Scot had a pint of Scotch short of Scotch whiskey.

00:08:15.000 The Portuguese guys had a glass of port.

00:08:18.000 And the Irishman had a glass of Irish whiskey.

00:08:22.000 Who paid for it?

00:08:24.000 The Irishman.

00:08:25.000 The Germans.

00:08:30.000 Did you hear that there was this guy and his wife had been in a horrible accident?

00:08:34.000 And he said, I've got some bad news and some good news.

00:08:38.000 And he says, what do you want first?

00:08:40.000 And the guy goes, oh, God, give me the bad news first.

00:08:43.000 And he says, okay, she's pretty banged up.

00:08:46.000 She's a vegetable.

00:08:48.000 It's possible she'll recover.

00:08:50.000 It's possible she'll be able to speak again.

00:08:51.000 But as for now, she's completely paralyzed from the neck down.

00:08:54.000 I don't think she can understand anything.

00:08:56.000 I advise you keep talking to her over the years in case it is going in there, but we can't gauge it.

00:09:01.000 There's no brain activity whatsoever.

00:09:04.000 Bed sores are going to be an issue.

00:09:05.000 So you're going to have to roll her over and wash her regularly and change her colostomy bag, and she'll be fed with an IV drip.

00:09:12.000 But you should also see if you can feed her once in a while to sort of reenact the sort of jaw mechanisms and maybe get something going in at least the next five years.

00:09:20.000 And he goes, oh my God.

00:09:23.000 And he goes, what's the good news?

00:09:25.000 And he goes, I'm just kidding.

00:09:26.000 She's dead.

00:09:30.000 All right, let's get it serious.

00:09:31.000 So here's a crazy theory I have because I've been noticing old Jewish men attacking me recently.

00:09:37.000 And I think there is a thing with boomers where they have been sort of traumatized by their father's bona fide PTSD from the Holocaust.

00:09:48.000 And they talk it at their kids.

00:09:50.000 And it was, you know, World War II was unfathomable.

00:09:53.000 And they get traumatized by it.

00:09:56.000 And I know guys, like the few liberals that would still speak to me, although they probably wouldn't anymore, it was a few years ago.

00:10:02.000 Peter Cooper, the cartoonist, and Michael Hershorn, the TV producer.

00:10:08.000 They both said to me at separate instances, are you going to have my back when the Gestapo comes to round me up?

00:10:14.000 This is after Trump won.

00:10:16.000 I'm like, so hold on a sec.

00:10:18.000 Trump is going to decide that Jews need to be rounded up, just like World War II, and you'll be ripped from your deluxe apartment in the Upper East Side and thrown into a cattle car and brought away.

00:10:31.000 And that's not an uncommon mentality.

00:10:34.000 In fact, it affects the FBI's behavior, it affects the media, and the mentality is if white males are not chock a block with shame, they will start to grow and get more and more violent and more and more dangerous,

00:10:50.000 and they will eventually start World War IV, no, World War III, and that will include rounding up gypsies, blacks, cripples, gays.

00:10:59.000 In fact, remember when Trump won, teachers were saying, I stand by my immigrant students.

00:11:03.000 I stand by my trans students.

00:11:05.000 I stand by my handicapped students.

00:11:08.000 So when Trump sends people to round up some poor boy in a chair who has to talk with a little thing in his mouth, I'm hungry, he's just going to get thrown over someone's shoulder and walked out and dumped in the van and driven off.

00:11:24.000 Retarded.

00:11:25.000 But anyway, I believe these old men who have been attacking me, they want to go out in a blaze of glory as a final peace to their fathers.

00:11:36.000 And so they want me to beat them up or they want to, I don't know, bite me on the way down or get in a fight.

00:11:41.000 Because there's been at least three times when I've had an incident like that where some stranger shows up where I am, old Jewish guy, usually born in 45.

00:11:50.000 And he's like one guy I was having dinner with Ann Coulter.

00:11:54.000 He didn't know who Ann Coulter was, but he's on his walker and he goes up to me and he starts going, like I guess he's giving me COVID or something.

00:12:04.000 He was about 10 feet away, so the waiters didn't notice.

00:12:07.000 And he kept doing it and then he left for a bit and then he came back later with his grandkids still staring at me.

00:12:17.000 Like am I supposed to go out and just go and kill him?

00:12:21.000 Well, I don't know.

00:12:21.000 I mean, you're assigning all this to a Jewish thing.

00:12:25.000 I'd have thought, to me, the obvious answer is they're mental.

00:12:29.000 Was the guy at the pub last night mental?

00:12:32.000 Ryan, it looks like he's being served, like, as a dish.

00:12:36.000 Oh, I'm trying to make him the bartender.

00:12:39.000 Oh, I see.

00:12:41.000 So the bartender's sitting down.

00:12:42.000 Yeah, there's no pub.

00:12:43.000 There's no patrons there.

00:12:47.000 I'm on a break.

00:12:48.000 Yes.

00:12:49.000 So you think the guy last night was nuts?

00:12:52.000 Well, I just wasn't, well, I don't think he was totally insane.

00:12:55.000 He just wasn't quite with it.

00:12:57.000 Ah.

00:12:58.000 And he was younger than you.

00:13:00.000 Yes.

00:13:01.000 43.

00:13:02.000 And a lot of great jokes were lost on him.

00:13:04.000 Like when he said he was born in 43, you were born in, what, 46?

00:13:07.000 No, I was born in 43.

00:13:09.000 He was born in 2016.

00:13:10.000 Oh, yeah.

00:13:10.000 Yeah, you were born three years earlier.

00:13:12.000 And he said, don't worry, we'll all get there one day.

00:13:15.000 Which went whoosh.

00:13:17.000 But what else did he say?

00:13:18.000 Do you remember anything else?

00:13:21.000 Biden's done more for this country.

00:13:23.000 Well, I asked him about what policy of Trump was a problem.

00:13:29.000 You know, he's on about how Trump did this, Trump did that, but never mentioned any of Trump's policies.

00:13:34.000 And I find this is true of most people on the left.

00:13:38.000 You know, they criticize Trump for his treatment of women, you know.

00:13:45.000 I don't think they realize all men talk like that in power.

00:13:49.000 Yeah.

00:13:50.000 And if you're rich and famous and you're surrounded with models, they will let you grab their pussy voluntarily.

00:13:58.000 They love it.

00:13:59.000 They're horny for power and wealth.

00:14:01.000 I think people hate Trump so much they can't imagine a woman would ever want to fuck him, but lots do.

00:14:06.000 And women are only as loyal as their opportunities.

00:14:09.000 Men are only as loyal as their opportunities.

00:14:10.000 Well, the only reason I hate Trump for that is because I'm jealous.

00:14:21.000 Yeah.

00:14:22.000 Speaking of which, J-Lo and A-Rod are done.

00:14:27.000 Oh, no.

00:14:29.000 Yeah.

00:14:30.000 Sorry to go for something as light as Judaism and get all harsh with J-Lo, but I think he cheated on her one too many times.

00:14:40.000 But can you blame him?

00:14:41.000 He probably has pussy hurled at him on a regular basis.

00:14:44.000 You can only refuse so many blowjobs.

00:14:46.000 Well, I remember that Lorraine's father telling us about a singer.

00:14:54.000 What was the guy?

00:14:55.000 He kept shaking his hips all the time.

00:14:58.000 Tom Jones?

00:14:59.000 Tom Jones.

00:15:00.000 And he's saying, you know, the women can't stand Tom Jones.

00:15:03.000 They were throwing their panties at him.

00:15:07.000 They can't stand for Tom Jones.

00:15:09.000 They all lay down and sit on his face.

00:15:14.000 She always looks great in photos, though, J-Lo.

00:15:16.000 And she's got that nice broken in thing where she's got some laugh lines.

00:15:21.000 But you're not seeing J-Lo, I'm afraid.

00:15:25.000 You're seeing hours and hours of Photoshop and makeup and lighting.

00:15:31.000 It's very Queen Latifah-ish, her face.

00:15:34.000 Oh, yeah.

00:15:35.000 Look how weird he looks.

00:15:36.000 He's wearing makeup too.

00:15:37.000 I hate when men do that.

00:15:39.000 When you look at pictures, Fox News will have a billboard at Grand Central and it'll have Tucker and Hannity and Greg Gutfeld and they look wet.

00:15:47.000 I don't mean wet as in moist.

00:15:48.000 I mean wet as in the British saying, meaning a strange pedophile because they're caked in foundation.

00:15:56.000 And in these high-res billboards, the file is probably 40 gigs and it's not missing a microbe of detail.

00:16:03.000 You see like the powder in the cracks and it's disturbing.

00:16:08.000 It comes from the 80s where cameras couldn't really pick you up and the lights, these are LED lights in this studio.

00:16:15.000 They're not hot at all.

00:16:16.000 Put your hand on them.

00:16:17.000 But in the old days, it was like movie spotlights.

00:16:20.000 So guys would get wet and they'd have this shiny forehead that was distracting and they'd look stressed out.

00:16:26.000 Like Nixon.

00:16:27.000 Like Nixon.

00:16:28.000 So they put powder on it and it wasn't as distracting.

00:16:31.000 Now they don't need that anymore and we switched to high def.

00:16:34.000 So I look at like Lou Dobbs.

00:16:36.000 He looks like a peach.

00:16:38.000 He looks like a fucking 20 year old's pussy right after she just got waxed.

00:16:43.000 It's not a good look.

00:16:46.000 Also in the news, Khloe Kardashian has a picture out that she's trying to erase from the internet.

00:16:55.000 And it shows exactly what I'm talking about here.

00:16:58.000 What she looks like in real life.

00:17:00.000 And the difference is too, like, I understand women wanting to lie, especially if they're single, about what they look like.

00:17:06.000 But we're totally fine with old men.

00:17:09.000 We see them every day.

00:17:10.000 I've got one in my face right now.

00:17:12.000 So when you see Lou Dobbs looking old with the odd liver spot or something, it's not remotely distracting.

00:17:18.000 You just go, yeah, there's an old man.

00:17:21.000 But with women, look what she's done.

00:17:23.000 It's a good job, actually, in the other picture.

00:17:27.000 I don't really have a problem with either of those.

00:17:30.000 Yeah, girls are using this thing called FaceTune.

00:17:32.000 They don't post a picture without FaceTuning it.

00:17:34.000 Face tune.

00:17:35.000 Yeah, so you could smooth everything out.

00:17:38.000 Well, she's probably went and got makeup on.

00:17:40.000 In that one, she was swimming and her makeup's gone.

00:17:43.000 And then in that one, she's probably spent like an hour with makeup.

00:17:46.000 They must have a makeup artist that just lives there.

00:17:49.000 You see that blur here?

00:17:50.000 Like at the top left corner, like use that as a pointer.

00:17:53.000 Here, there's a blur there.

00:17:54.000 They'll morph their body.

00:17:56.000 There's like this drag and smudge tool.

00:17:59.000 So this here, you could usually see there's a little distortion there.

00:18:02.000 All right.

00:18:03.000 Yeah.

00:18:03.000 And people are getting wise to that.

00:18:06.000 Like everything's being face-tuned, basically.

00:18:08.000 Well, the good news, Chloe, is I'll fuck you even in the first picture.

00:18:11.000 That's great news.

00:18:12.000 So don't worry about it.

00:18:13.000 That's the good news.

00:18:14.000 What's the bad news?

00:18:16.000 The good news is I'll fuck you.

00:18:17.000 The bad news is you'd end up fucking me.

00:18:24.000 Cheeks versus Cheeks.

00:18:25.000 Last thing on the porn section of the show, there's a Russian photographer.

00:18:31.000 The Russians have balls because they're drunk all the time.

00:18:34.000 And he had the courage to risk, I think, like a year in jail and a $15,000 fine by photographing a bunch of Ukrainian women's asses in Dubai.

00:18:43.000 Now, of course, the Middle East is, what would you say, Dad, 500 years behind us?

00:18:50.000 Yes.

00:18:51.000 That's generous.

00:18:52.000 Sometimes we go with 1,000.

00:18:54.000 Well, I would say it's a bit like Scotland 200 years ago.

00:19:00.000 Right.

00:19:00.000 Where you weren't allowed to dance on a Sunday.

00:19:08.000 Really?

00:19:09.000 Well, because people would think you're having sex.

00:19:12.000 I don't understand.

00:19:14.000 What kind of black twerking dances were they doing?

00:19:18.000 They somehow got in a time machine and learned how to twerk to trap music?

00:19:23.000 Oh, that's...

00:19:25.000 Because I assumed 200 years ago was, ah doodley, doddly, diddly, doodley, diddley.

00:19:28.000 Where's your penis going to go?

00:19:31.000 I don't want to get into details here.

00:19:33.000 Huh.

00:19:34.000 Well, Dad met mom, or maybe, had you met her at this pub where she was the first woman to ever use the bathroom.

00:19:44.000 Yes, that's right.

00:19:45.000 It was very common for pubs not to have women's washrooms.

00:19:51.000 Very common.

00:19:52.000 Sounds like paradise.

00:19:56.000 Well, it's pathetic.

00:19:58.000 On a Friday night, the men would go and spend their wages in the pub, and the women would send their kids in so they could get their housekeeping money for the next day.

00:20:11.000 Oh, right.

00:20:11.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:20:14.000 And your dad, who was named Johnny McGinnis, changed his name to McInnes because no one trusts an Irish bookie.

00:20:22.000 That's right.

00:20:23.000 And he also was ostrichized because he refused to take money from women for bets.

00:20:30.000 Well, he wasn't ostracized.

00:20:31.000 He just didn't make any money.

00:20:33.000 Oh, I see.

00:20:35.000 Because that was a lot of money.

00:20:36.000 Yes.

00:20:37.000 And he thought, if a woman's giving me money, then she's spending her grocery money or something important because women had allotted allowances.

00:20:45.000 Exactly.

00:20:46.000 Is this any of this supposed to sound bad to me?

00:20:52.000 Anyway, let's blow up those asses and do a rating system here.

00:20:56.000 I mean, if he's going to be paying $15,000 and going to jail.

00:21:01.000 Can you use the cursor, Ryan?

00:21:04.000 Oh, two point.

00:21:05.000 Yes.

00:21:05.000 Sure.

00:21:05.000 Okay, so we got number one.

00:21:07.000 Wait, why can't you just use the cursor cursor?

00:21:09.000 All right.

00:21:10.000 Let's see.

00:21:11.000 There we go.

00:21:12.000 So this one here.

00:21:13.000 Okay, so I'm going to give that.

00:21:15.000 Obviously, I wouldn't kick any of them out of bed for eating crackers.

00:21:18.000 These are supermodels.

00:21:20.000 But we have to go within the parameters of what's available to us, and we can afford to be very choosy here, right?

00:21:26.000 So this isn't based on Earth.

00:21:29.000 This is based on those asses.

00:21:31.000 Okay.

00:21:31.000 That's the law of averages.

00:21:33.000 He has not heard what you've said so far.

00:21:35.000 Just staring at the asses.

00:21:38.000 The first one I'm going to give a low score.

00:21:40.000 Really?

00:21:41.000 Yes, I'm going to give it a 6.

00:21:45.000 Seven.

00:21:46.000 That's crazy.

00:21:46.000 I think that's one of the best ones in the line.

00:21:48.000 They've all got beautiful asses.

00:21:50.000 Yeah, Dad, it doesn't work like that, though.

00:21:52.000 We have to have a median.

00:21:55.000 We have to have an average.

00:21:56.000 Asterage.

00:21:58.000 So the average IQ here is 100.

00:22:03.000 Second one, I'm giving a worse rating to.

00:22:05.000 I'm giving a six.

00:22:06.000 There's no meat on those bones.

00:22:07.000 That could be a 12-year-old boy.

00:22:09.000 Yeah, that's a six.

00:22:10.000 Third one is we're going back up now to seven.

00:22:13.000 I'm going eight point something.

00:22:15.000 On which one?

00:22:15.000 I'm going to ask you, I'm appealing this one to at least a high seven.

00:22:22.000 She's also on her tippy toes pushing it up and out, isn't she?

00:22:25.000 Sure, but it is working.

00:22:27.000 Okay.

00:22:28.000 That next one, terrible.

00:22:31.000 I mean, what are you supposed to do with that?

00:22:33.000 It's cute, but yeah, it's not.

00:22:34.000 It's not cute.

00:22:35.000 It's not acceptable.

00:22:36.000 That's a five.

00:22:38.000 Now we're starting to really climb.

00:22:41.000 I'm going to give this a 7.6.

00:22:43.000 Dad, we haven't heard any of your scores here.

00:22:46.000 Well, I would rate them all as a 10.

00:22:48.000 For existing.

00:22:51.000 That's the problem with men of a certain age.

00:22:53.000 I noticed that too.

00:22:55.000 A friend of mine, he's about 50, and he's on these dating apps.

00:22:59.000 And he's like, it's a pain in the ass going through them all.

00:23:00.000 He had his iPad.

00:23:02.000 And he goes, just you do it.

00:23:03.000 It was Emily and I. So we sat there and she was like, oh, she's nice, but she probably wouldn't love you.

00:23:07.000 And this one looks reliable.

00:23:09.000 And this one looks cool.

00:23:10.000 She's kind of fun.

00:23:11.000 I was like, give me that.

00:23:12.000 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

00:23:15.000 I just filled up his yes box.

00:23:17.000 They all look fine.

00:23:18.000 If you don't like them, only go on one date.

00:23:20.000 They'll get a D for effort.

00:23:22.000 Okay, the next one is a winner.

00:23:24.000 I'm going to go up to an 8.8.

00:23:26.000 Although I'm bummed she wore those stupid shower shoes.

00:23:30.000 I didn't even realize.

00:23:31.000 It wrecks the whole consistency.

00:23:33.000 Do you think the hair is factoring in for you too?

00:23:35.000 Nope.

00:23:36.000 Okay.

00:23:37.000 If it was the hair, I would have given that previous one a high score.

00:23:42.000 27s.

00:23:44.000 The one with the tattoo, we're not nuts about the tattoo, but she seems to have quite a posterior.

00:23:48.000 I'm going to give her an eight.

00:23:51.000 And then I can't see what's happening after that.

00:23:53.000 But go down and see what his fine is going to be.

00:23:55.000 What's his punishment?

00:23:58.000 I think you've got to go up, actually.

00:24:02.000 Oh, $1,500?

00:24:04.000 Wait, up to six months behind bars.

00:24:08.000 That would suck.

00:24:08.000 That's the part that stinks.

00:24:09.000 Saudi Arabian prison?

00:24:11.000 Can't you find it?

00:24:12.000 Yeah, Dubai's very strict about just about everything there, huh?

00:24:15.000 Yeah, that'd be murder on your asshole.

00:24:20.000 They're not very good dressers, Ukrainians.

00:24:24.000 All right, let's start the show, shall we?

00:24:27.000 Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

00:24:30.000 Before we do, let's look at yesterday's show.

00:24:34.000 Yes.

00:24:35.000 Today's.

00:24:36.000 Wait, I actually have two more things before we get into that.

00:24:39.000 Maybe three.

00:24:41.000 That's one zero in the notes.

00:24:44.000 So you're going back up.

00:24:45.000 Because my dad is very, very insecure.

00:24:49.000 And he was worried it was a flop.

00:24:52.000 And he drank himself into a stupor yesterday saying, I think they hate me.

00:24:58.000 I noticed you take some poetic license.

00:25:01.000 Nope.

00:25:03.000 So I laughed at Gavin saying, I heard Trump was back on Twitter.

00:25:05.000 Can you move it over towards me a little more so I can read it better?

00:25:08.000 I still haven't gotten a new monitor.

00:25:12.000 Keep churning content out, boring.

00:25:14.000 Replace Rye with Jimmy.

00:25:15.000 Oh, that's good.

00:25:16.000 I also had a guy at the gym today say you should have your own show.

00:25:21.000 Oh, I said this a lot.

00:25:24.000 Some guy came into my gym today, black dude.

00:25:26.000 He's been there maybe seven times.

00:25:29.000 We're listening to bagpipes and stuff.

00:25:31.000 Lots of Irish are there in the morning.

00:25:33.000 He's the only black guy there.

00:25:34.000 He takes over the stereo.

00:25:37.000 This is his seventh visit.

00:25:40.000 I think you should maybe be there for a year.

00:25:42.000 And then starts playing trap music, rap music really, really loud.

00:25:46.000 And then I'm over by there because that's where the double-ended bags are.

00:25:49.000 And the coach has to yell out what the next thing is.

00:25:53.000 And he says lunges.

00:25:54.000 But he doesn't mean for a round.

00:25:56.000 These are lunges, by the way, this long walkie thing.

00:25:59.000 And he means as the break in between rounds.

00:26:02.000 And I go, what, lunges?

00:26:04.000 And then I still can't hear him.

00:26:05.000 I go, I'm at a fucking rap concert.

00:26:08.000 And he goes, you know what?

00:26:08.000 I'm not coaching you anymore.

00:26:09.000 Larry, you coach him.

00:26:11.000 I go, I can't hear you.

00:26:12.000 I'm not a bat.

00:26:14.000 And he goes, he called me a lazy faggot.

00:26:17.000 Oh, that's what everyone did.

00:26:19.000 You're not lazy.

00:26:20.000 Whoa.

00:26:22.000 You are not lazy.

00:26:24.000 And I said, you got this fucking fat Albert and the Cosby kids' bottom lip.

00:26:31.000 Love lunges.

00:26:33.000 I can't understand you.

00:26:34.000 I thought you were singing that 50s classic Rama Lama Ding Dong or whatever it's called.

00:26:38.000 Blue Moon.

00:26:40.000 Yeah, Blue Moon.

00:26:41.000 And then I think I hurt his feelings.

00:26:44.000 Because at the end of that, he just played Candy Crush and didn't look at me.

00:26:48.000 And then at the end of the night or day, whatever I said, bye, coach, and he just goes, bye.

00:26:53.000 You have hurt me today.

00:26:57.000 So, anyway, the actual boxers there were our fans, at least one.

00:27:05.000 I think you can comment on stuff.

00:27:06.000 I don't really see you, like, accruing a bunch of topics.

00:27:12.000 Oh, I'm sorry.

00:27:13.000 I wasn't prepared for this.

00:27:15.000 Yeah, but if that was your assignment, I couldn't really see you coming with notes.

00:27:19.000 Like, I'm ready to go.

00:27:22.000 Well, Joe Biden doesn't take notes either.

00:27:26.000 Like, I saw you watching the Chauvin trial.

00:27:28.000 What's your opinion on that so far?

00:27:30.000 Incredibly boring.

00:27:35.000 I think lawyers are just losing the touch.

00:27:38.000 They ask all these questions that go on and on and on.

00:27:43.000 And by the time they get to the end of the question, the witness has now forgotten what they started with.

00:27:49.000 And then say, well, could you repeat the question?

00:27:52.000 Oh, no.

00:27:53.000 Please don't.

00:27:54.000 Yeah, there's no flare anymore.

00:27:55.000 It's not exactly to kill a mockingbird.

00:27:58.000 No, that's very true.

00:28:00.000 Well, there's just too many lawyers.

00:28:03.000 And it also seems so slow.

00:28:06.000 I mean, the chauvin trial is going to be probably another, what, three weeks, four weeks?

00:28:11.000 Oh.

00:28:12.000 We got the evidence.

00:28:13.000 Sit in the room.

00:28:15.000 But then I could do it in a day.

00:28:17.000 And they'll say to a witness, but what do you think?

00:28:20.000 Well, that's irrelevant.

00:28:22.000 Who cares what the witness thinks?

00:28:23.000 Yeah, and they also do a lot of this, like, showed no remorse in the courtroom.

00:28:26.000 I don't care if you show up in a clown costume.

00:28:28.000 I don't care if you're laughing and pointing at the victim's family.

00:28:32.000 Did you do it?

00:28:33.000 What is the evidence?

00:28:35.000 Here's the sentence.

00:28:37.000 I don't need crocodile tears.

00:28:39.000 Who fucking cares how they reacted in the courtroom?

00:28:43.000 You're just begging for drama club kids.

00:28:48.000 Also, I'm sorry, let's go see a few more comments just to see if dad's insecurities are justified and if he should have been crying last night.

00:28:55.000 Can't believe the MLB has gone fully woke.

00:28:57.000 Oh, that's one thing I wanted to cover, Ryan.

00:28:59.000 It was in yesterday's notes.

00:29:01.000 What exactly does CitiField say?

00:29:04.000 Because I could have sworn one of them was, you need a vaccine within 72 hours, which means I have to keep getting the fucking vaccine.

00:29:14.000 No, absolutely not.

00:29:16.000 I don't even think you're allowed to do that.

00:29:17.000 There was a test.

00:29:19.000 A test.

00:29:19.000 You need to have a COVID test.

00:29:22.000 Okay, a vaccination at least 14 days prior.

00:29:27.000 Well, that's pretty rich.

00:29:29.000 What is nuts?

00:29:32.000 I don't understand that.

00:29:33.000 So at the 15th day, I have to go and get a new vaccination?

00:29:37.000 No.

00:29:38.000 No.

00:29:40.000 What they're saying is, we want 14 days for the vaccination to take effect.

00:29:45.000 Oh, and then I'm good forever.

00:29:47.000 Then you're good forever.

00:29:48.000 I understand.

00:29:49.000 So if I get a vaccination now, I can't go to a game for two weeks.

00:29:53.000 Exactly.

00:29:56.000 But then I got to keep shoving a q-tip up my kid's nose every time he wants to see a game.

00:30:02.000 Yes.

00:30:02.000 Because they're not giving kids the vax.

00:30:06.000 I mean, we're not going to games.

00:30:09.000 No.

00:30:12.000 All right.

00:30:13.000 A couple more comments because this is getting tedious.

00:30:19.000 Am I the only one expecting Gavin's dad to look like Fat Bastard?

00:30:22.000 That's a Mike Myers character who's Scottish.

00:30:25.000 Who's very large?

00:30:26.000 Jimmy is a gorgeous sweetheart.

00:30:29.000 Well, there you go.

00:30:30.000 That's good.

00:30:31.000 This was a great episode.

00:30:32.000 I like when Jimmy gets some love on the show.

00:30:35.000 He's an interesting, cool dude.

00:30:38.000 Well, I feel so much better about myself now.

00:30:42.000 I felt like I was in the room with you.

00:30:44.000 High-quality interview composition and natural conversation.

00:30:48.000 Having him on for the whole show was genius.

00:30:55.000 I can't believe how natural your banter felt and how well the jokes landed.

00:31:03.000 This is G-O-M-L at another level, A-plus.

00:31:07.000 110%.

00:31:09.000 Plus 45 meters.

00:31:11.000 Would recommend to a friend.

00:31:13.000 45 meters.

00:31:14.000 Let me just explain that inside joke to you.

00:31:15.000 Joy Villa was on my show, and I do this dumb joke I stole from the Carol Burnett show where I pull my pants up to my knees and then kneel on my shoes so I look like a midget.

00:31:24.000 And I said, people are going to see this picture and go, I didn't know Joy Villa was so tall.

00:31:29.000 What is she?

00:31:30.000 She's like eight feet tall.

00:31:32.000 And then her weird Danish husband, who I believe she divorced shortly after, goes, yes, they are going to say she is as tall as the Statue of Liberty plus 80 meters.

00:31:47.000 That guy's a natural comedian.

00:31:50.000 A, when you're exaggerating, you have to be roughly in the ballpark.

00:31:56.000 So NBA player works, eight feet we can do.

00:32:00.000 Not nine feet.

00:32:01.000 No.

00:32:01.000 The Statue of Liberty, I don't know how tall it is.

00:32:04.000 It's maybe 500 feet.

00:32:06.000 I'm guessing of that order.

00:32:08.000 Okay, that's very, very tall.

00:32:10.000 Why are you adding height to that?

00:32:13.000 And also, why is it in metric?

00:32:15.000 You're ruining.

00:32:16.000 Do you know your audience?

00:32:18.000 Plus 40 meters.

00:32:20.000 I was disturbed by that for days.

00:32:23.000 I kept hearing it in my head, echo, echo.

00:32:26.000 All right, that's enough of the comments.

00:32:27.000 And then the last thing, the dude From Car Guys texted me and he goes, Why did you leave West Virginia without calling me?

00:32:35.000 I said, You were busy.

00:32:37.000 He goes, No, I was busy on the weekday.

00:32:40.000 On the weekend, I'm not busy at all.

00:32:42.000 Oh, no.

00:32:42.000 You said, Can I come shoot Car Guys?

00:32:44.000 I said, No, we're doing repairs.

00:32:46.000 He goes, You should have popped by my house.

00:32:48.000 He goes, You were right next to me.

00:32:50.000 And then it gets crazier.

00:32:51.000 Frederick, you were there with us, right?

00:32:55.000 God, sometimes you're so bad at contributing to the conversation, I can't remember if you were there.

00:33:02.000 Frederick, who?

00:33:03.000 He's like a wallflower.

00:33:04.000 Douglas?

00:33:05.000 No, Frederick, Maryland.

00:33:08.000 That's where we went and had fish and chips at the Bushwater.

00:33:12.000 Oh, Bushwater.

00:33:14.000 That's half an hour from where I was in West Virginia.

00:33:16.000 That's it.

00:33:17.000 And here's a much more important part.

00:33:18.000 Frederick's a cute little town.

00:33:20.000 Yes, it is.

00:33:21.000 So you could live, maybe not in the total sticks in West Virginia, but you could be in that area, get the redneck lifestyle, and then have the quaint yuppie shit in Frederick, Maryland.

00:33:34.000 I thought of Frederick, Maryland as two hours from West Virginia, because they're both an hour from D.C. But they're both an hour from D.C. in the same direction, moron.

00:33:44.000 Moral of the story is do your research before you go on a solo road trip.

00:33:52.000 So West Virginia is better.

00:33:53.000 And again, I'm glad Cassandra got her cat stitches out, but it wasn't exactly the hosting of the century.

00:34:02.000 You know that story, right?

00:34:03.000 About some cats and stitches?

00:34:06.000 I planned to go to West Virginia to check it out for the family to possibly move there.

00:34:11.000 I understand.

00:34:12.000 And my host, who I'd been talking about this with Daze, goes, I have to get my cat stitches out today.

00:34:16.000 We can't do it any other day.

00:34:18.000 I can't host you.

00:34:19.000 I can't show you around.

00:34:22.000 Can't you just cut them with like mustache scissors and pull them out with a tweezer?

00:34:27.000 Or leave early?

00:34:28.000 Or give me someone else while you're going to do that?

00:34:31.000 Yeah, I don't think it matters if the stitches were in there for another day.

00:34:35.000 Well, he's got to wear a cone.

00:34:38.000 And so he attacks the stitches.

00:34:40.000 And she's had to spoon feed him with this darn cone on.

00:34:44.000 Just kill them all.

00:34:47.000 I totally agree with you about cats and dogs.

00:34:49.000 Well, I just, I never ever understood this concept of domestic animals.

00:34:55.000 No.

00:34:56.000 They're disgusting.

00:34:58.000 Well, no, people will take them, and sometimes there'll be two dogs in a stroller.

00:35:06.000 Oh, Lord.

00:35:08.000 Here's what drives me nuts about dogs.

00:35:10.000 If it was a horse even that you tamed or a wolf, I get that, sort of.

00:35:16.000 I mean, like with Steve up in an hour north of you in Ottawa there, he has his land he got.

00:35:24.000 We won't get into how, but he's got all that land, and he's got these two huskies, which are basically wolves.

00:35:30.000 They don't go in the house, and he doesn't buy them food.

00:35:32.000 They eat deer and raccoons and stuff.

00:35:36.000 Okay, I see that appeal.

00:35:37.000 They're guard dogs.

00:35:39.000 He goes on a trip.

00:35:40.000 He'll be in his skidoo and they're barking next to him.

00:35:43.000 I can wrap my head around that.

00:35:45.000 It's not my cup of tea, but I get it.

00:35:48.000 Or a horse.

00:35:48.000 It was a wild stallion.

00:35:49.000 Then you use it and you go to your friend's house or you go to the doctor's with it or something.

00:35:53.000 You go and get bacon from the farm.

00:35:56.000 You're cool.

00:35:57.000 That's fine.

00:35:58.000 But these dogs that we have in our homes, like my shithead dog, it's been bastardized.

00:36:03.000 It's been twisted and bred and inbred and made to love you unconditionally, need constant affection.

00:36:10.000 And then these lonely fat women go, he loves me.

00:36:14.000 I'm special.

00:36:14.000 No, you're not appreciated.

00:36:16.000 You might as well be appreciated by a robot that we designed to say, I appreciate you.

00:36:21.000 It's a robot.

00:36:22.000 It's not a dog.

00:36:23.000 It's not a creature.

00:36:24.000 To eat that boo-boo.

00:36:29.000 No.

00:36:31.000 But people going about how a dog will love you unconditionally.

00:36:36.000 Yeah, I know.

00:36:36.000 I've made it do that.

00:36:37.000 No, try.

00:36:38.000 Don't feed it and see how long this lasts.

00:36:42.000 Yeah, don't feed it, then fall and hit your head and be unconscious for three days and see where your face is at when you come to.

00:36:49.000 Well, you know I had a dog.

00:36:52.000 I was training it to go without food.

00:36:56.000 And just as it was learning, it died.

00:36:58.000 Hey, didn't you...

00:37:00.000 We can't tell my youngest boy this ever, but didn't you kill a bunch of puppies?

00:37:07.000 Well, I would be eight years of ages.

00:37:10.000 It was kittens.

00:37:11.000 I was taking kittens to the animal place to have them put down.

00:37:18.000 So you had cats as a kid?

00:37:20.000 Yes.

00:37:21.000 Well, probably because of mice and stuff.

00:37:23.000 I don't know why.

00:37:25.000 I was too young.

00:37:25.000 I'd be like eight.

00:37:27.000 Okay.

00:37:28.000 With your no shoes and your hand-me-down things and dirt on your face and stuff?

00:37:34.000 It's true.

00:37:35.000 He didn't have shoes as a kid.

00:37:36.000 His toes, we won't show them on the arrow.

00:37:38.000 You'll pick it up.

00:37:38.000 Well, he had shoes, but they didn't fit me.

00:37:41.000 These are his toes.

00:37:42.000 It's like Chinese foot binding.

00:37:44.000 I can't, maybe one of the reasons I hate flip-flops so much is because it gives me PTSD thinking of my dad's disgusting feet.

00:37:51.000 But if you ever wear shoes that are too small, you can tolerate it for about nine minutes.

00:37:56.000 Not nine years.

00:37:59.000 Well, I mean, my shoes, my clothes never ever fitted me.

00:38:04.000 What would happen is my Christmas present would be a school uniform.

00:38:10.000 And of course I was growing up, you know, in high school.

00:38:13.000 So they would start off with the outfit, the uniform, and they would say, well, you grow into it.

00:38:22.000 So I'd start off two sizes too big for me.

00:38:25.000 And then by the end of the year, it fitted me, but it was in rags.

00:38:32.000 And then you get another giant talking heads suit.

00:38:36.000 You may find yourself.

00:38:38.000 But what was the kittens?

00:38:39.000 So your cat of kittens, you couldn't take care of them.

00:38:41.000 So you went to put them down.

00:38:42.000 You're crossing the River Clyde with a potato sack full of kittens.

00:38:46.000 And they fell.

00:38:48.000 You gotta be proud.

00:38:49.000 He threw them in the river.

00:38:51.000 He threw a bunch of kittens in the river.

00:38:54.000 You're a bad man.

00:38:55.000 I don't think the devil would do that.

00:38:57.000 He would blast them with fire or something.

00:38:59.000 They're throwing themselves into the road.

00:39:02.000 But The devil didn't have to walk all the way to the dog and get home.

00:39:05.000 Oh, you also had like a shilling to pay for it, which you kept and I believe bought sweets.

00:39:11.000 Well, probably.

00:39:13.000 Yeah.

00:39:14.000 All right.

00:39:14.000 Well, speaking of decrepit old men, let's do a quick look at Biden.

00:39:20.000 We don't have much on him.

00:39:22.000 I'm spoiled with him.

00:39:23.000 If it's not the most ridiculous quote ever that we can make a t-shirt out of, I don't want to hear about it.

00:39:30.000 Biden.

00:39:34.000 Biden.

00:39:36.000 President.

00:39:37.000 He's big and loose.

00:39:39.000 Sleepy.

00:39:39.000 But a friendly monster too.

00:39:42.000 My cat.

00:39:43.000 Biden.

00:39:43.000 Wait, what?

00:39:44.000 That doesn't rhyme.

00:39:48.000 The angle there, Dad, is that we no longer resent him.

00:39:51.000 We see him as adorable.

00:39:53.000 Like a silly old dog that does funny things because his brain is rotten.

00:40:00.000 Well, it wasn't all long ago, you know, that in asylums in England, you know, people would visit them just to be entertained by their mental patients.

00:40:11.000 And I think that's what's happening.

00:40:13.000 That's where we're at.

00:40:14.000 Yeah.

00:40:14.000 I look forward to seeing him.

00:40:16.000 Oh, there he is, the silly old man.

00:40:17.000 Tell us a story.

00:40:19.000 Like on the front page, it's saying he's mad at corporations for not paying tax, but he avoided $500,000 in tax.

00:40:25.000 Yeah, we know.

00:40:27.000 I mean, his son has the $50,000 a month job with the Ukrainian coal mine.

00:40:32.000 Do you think we thought there was anything but corruption in his finances?

00:40:36.000 Duh.

00:40:37.000 But I thought this was disturbing.

00:40:39.000 Speaking of letting your pet run the country's finances, this is one of the most haunting things I've ever read, including Stephen King.

00:40:48.000 25% of all the debt accumulated by the United States of America since 1776 was incurred in the last 12 months.

00:41:04.000 Now, 25 times 4 is 100.

00:41:08.000 In 4 years, we could have 100% of the debt, or at least 99.

00:41:14.000 We'd have what you call an asymptote debt, where there'd always be debt.

00:41:19.000 Exactly.

00:41:20.000 And did you see this, too?

00:41:22.000 Kind of old news.

00:41:23.000 23% of all U.S. dollars were created in the last year, and this was in 2020, I think.

00:41:28.000 What an apocalypse.

00:41:30.000 The only way we're going to get out of inflation when it finally really hits and it becomes like a barrel full of money, when we get to Zimbabwean levels, we'll need a war.

00:41:41.000 And the war will have to be with China.

00:41:43.000 Yeah, I wouldn't knock Zimbabwe.

00:41:45.000 Do you know there are more billionaires in Zimbabwe than anywhere else?

00:41:49.000 Oh, someone sent us a $1 million Zimbabwean note.

00:41:53.000 Let me get your candy.

00:41:56.000 Well, we looked into it.

00:41:57.000 A long-distance phone call is $13 million Zimbabwean dollars.

00:42:00.000 And a cheeseburger is $16 million Zimbabwean dollars.

00:42:04.000 But it's good.

00:42:09.000 So we're clearly drifting into socialism where we just have debt we can't pay, and the government would just have to handle everything.

00:42:15.000 But the good news is that young people, these Marxists, these college students, they are ready for socialism.

00:42:23.000 They are big on workers' unions and workers' rights.

00:42:26.000 Not huge on work, though.

00:42:28.000 And I've noticed when you look up what do you want to do after the revolution, it's always things like design uniforms is big.

00:42:35.000 Art is big.

00:42:38.000 Poetry is something.

00:42:39.000 Look at these clips where young people have described what they want to do in a Marxist society that it's based solely on labor.

00:42:48.000 Click on those each individual.

00:42:49.000 If communism was established.

00:42:51.000 Okay, so wait, that's just the question.

00:42:55.000 What's the next one?

00:42:58.000 Garden, care for animals, make slash prepare food and write novels.

00:43:04.000 You know what retired people do?

00:43:07.000 And hopefully find some irregular tasks with a gentle learning curve.

00:43:14.000 A gentle learning curve that contributes and connects me to my community.

00:43:18.000 If there's one thing that socialism is not, it's gentle.

00:43:21.000 You better learn how to swing that mallet now or you're going to get a fucking electric shock.

00:43:28.000 I'd like to get a horse, some survival supplies and writing supplies, and go live as a vagabond, relishing in the beauties of nature and writing poetry and songs to put this beauty into words and melody.

00:43:43.000 I'd also probably play a lot of D ⁇ D and learn how to paint.

00:43:46.000 So that's a lot of shit, by the way, you got to carry on your back there, vagabond.

00:43:50.000 And again, that is the life of a retired person.

00:43:56.000 Probably jack off and get free HRT.

00:43:59.000 What's HRT?

00:44:00.000 Hormone replacement therapy.

00:44:01.000 Ah, yeah.

00:44:03.000 Because if there's one thing communists love, it's homosexuals and trans.

00:44:08.000 Yes.

00:44:09.000 That's illegal, kids.

00:44:11.000 You're done.

00:44:12.000 That's the crazy thing about all you fucking imbeciles pushing for communism.

00:44:16.000 You're the first to go.

00:44:18.000 I'm the last to go.

00:44:19.000 Actually, you know, they kill the bourgeoisie.

00:44:21.000 They'd probably take my home.

00:44:23.000 But homosexuals, the creative community, gone.

00:44:28.000 And the media, too.

00:44:29.000 All these journalists, they're done.

00:44:32.000 Oh, no, no, no, as long as they'll work for state media.

00:44:34.000 Right, yeah, yeah.

00:44:35.000 I should say journalism is done.

00:44:37.000 Journalists, as long as they're PR agents, which you've noticed in America now.

00:44:41.000 But I thought this was very telling, and we skipped it yesterday, 1-7.

00:44:47.000 They were talking about Hunter Biden.

00:44:53.000 And I skipped over this, but if you scroll down and move it over for me.

00:45:01.000 It's by Meta.

00:45:03.000 So I think it's up.

00:45:04.000 I think it's the first one.

00:45:05.000 Oh, no.

00:45:06.000 Does it get lost?

00:45:07.000 There, there it is.

00:45:08.000 Okay, just up a bit more.

00:45:09.000 This sums it up.

00:45:10.000 This is why the left has never been more incompetent.

00:45:14.000 This is why the media sucks.

00:45:16.000 This is why we can't make money.

00:45:17.000 This is why women's sports has been ruined by trans because of women.

00:45:21.000 We've invited women into politics, and it's a math game.

00:45:25.000 It's a numbers game, and they don't like numbers, but they still want to participate.

00:45:29.000 It's just like Astrology.

00:45:30.000 They wanted to get into astrophysics.

00:45:32.000 They couldn't do the math, so they said, Can I just make up my own thing, astrology, and make it about my emotions?

00:45:37.000 Sure.

00:45:38.000 And that's what they've done with politics.

00:45:39.000 Look at this.

00:45:40.000 The why of things.

00:45:42.000 Show me the quote.

00:45:44.000 Here's the difference between the Trump and Biden family in one word: compassion.

00:45:49.000 You can feel, and thank you, Meta, Beth, for emphasizing the word feel.

00:45:55.000 You can feel the difference, having a true POTUS who believes and fights for a unity in America instead of division.

00:46:03.000 Much respect to the Biden family, but the Trumps can rot in hell.

00:46:08.000 Oh, that's is it all?

00:46:09.000 I'm starting to think women are communist.

00:46:11.000 They just want to go with their feelings, which are easy to manipulate, and then they want all their enemies to die.

00:46:16.000 You know, like Holodomor.

00:46:20.000 Well, I think I know.

00:46:21.000 There's a real mix of women in politics.

00:46:25.000 Angela Miracle has been a total disaster.

00:46:28.000 Yeah.

00:46:28.000 But Maggie Thatcher was fabulous.

00:46:30.000 Yeah.

00:46:30.000 We always bring up Maggie Thatcher.

00:46:32.000 Give me some more.

00:46:35.000 Golda Mair.

00:46:37.000 Who's that again?

00:46:38.000 She was the Prime Minister in Israel.

00:46:40.000 Okay.

00:46:41.000 She was excellent.

00:46:42.000 Yep.

00:46:50.000 No, there's a few around now, too, all these pro-gun governors and stuff.

00:46:53.000 But no, generally as a pattern, like I always say, almost half of my top 10 writers are female.

00:47:00.000 Malkin Cole.

00:47:00.000 Oh, the governor of South Dakota.

00:47:04.000 South Dakota.

00:47:05.000 She's great.

00:47:06.000 I fucked her at a party once.

00:47:09.000 Yeah, sure.

00:47:15.000 But yeah, five of my top 10 writers are female, but it's generally not a female trait.

00:47:22.000 They tend not to be good at it because it's about structure and knowing how to tell the story, beginning, middle, and end, introduction, hypothesis, backup paragraphs.

00:47:31.000 You'll notice with female articles, like in The Atlantic or something, you're just reading their notes.

00:47:37.000 It just goes on and on.

00:47:38.000 There's no rhyme or reason.

00:47:40.000 We have no sort of chorus verse chorus structure.

00:47:44.000 Well, what about Agatha Christie?

00:47:46.000 Yeah.

00:47:47.000 Agatha Christie.

00:47:49.000 All right, let's dive into racism, shall we?

00:47:53.000 For a change.

00:47:54.000 Are you sure you want to?

00:47:58.000 We don't have a choice.

00:48:01.000 That was racist, guys.

00:48:04.000 So our favorite dude, Taneshi Coates, is, he's an intellectual with no brains.

00:48:13.000 So what he does is he writes one book called White People Suck.

00:48:17.000 Then there's no substance there.

00:48:18.000 He writes about reparations for the Atlantic.

00:48:20.000 He makes, he giggles in front of white college students who then proceed to kiss his ass so much, some of them suffocate in there.

00:48:29.000 And then he...

00:48:30.000 I think I know why.

00:48:33.000 And then he goes, I'd like to keep writing, but it's a little challenging, this 80,000 words per book.

00:48:40.000 And they go, what about comic books?

00:48:42.000 Done.

00:48:44.000 So he doesn't just write for The Black Panther now, which I thought was just a silly one-off, which I believe he got fired from, didn't he?

00:48:52.000 But now he's doing Captain America.

00:48:55.000 And he's made it all about Proud Boys and Patriot Prayer and Jordan Peterson and Stefan Molinu and Cernovich.

00:49:03.000 Anyone who tells young men that they're not human garbage is the enemy in this.

00:49:09.000 And that's because Taneshi Coates is a racist.

00:49:11.000 He doesn't have a problem with young black men being proud of themselves or any other group, but whites and probably Asians and probably Orthodox Jews.

00:49:21.000 Yeah, those three, he's like, no, they can't stop being ashamed of themselves because they like themselves.

00:49:27.000 We have World War III and we'll all die.

00:49:30.000 Now, I think the Jewish guys I was talking about earlier, they're scared of that because they see, you know, World War III as a real possibility.

00:49:38.000 I think in the Taneshi Coates thing, they like that narrative, but they don't really give a shit about World War III.

00:49:44.000 They just don't like white people.

00:49:46.000 And I think Taneshi Coates, he came from an activist family.

00:49:48.000 He's had it hammered down his throat from birth that white people are evil and they're responsible for his problems.

00:49:54.000 And now he's a member of an anti-white cult, which white people love.

00:49:58.000 So anyway, this is what our children will be reading now.

00:50:02.000 Can you blow that up more?

00:50:06.000 Yeah, he did.

00:50:07.000 And then he goes, it's the same for all of them.

00:50:10.000 Young men, weak, looking for purpose.

00:50:14.000 I found the flag.

00:50:15.000 You found the badge.

00:50:16.000 And this is weird too.

00:50:18.000 Isn't it, it's kind of good that Captain America found the flag.

00:50:22.000 He ended World War II.

00:50:24.000 He went over there and saved our ass, according to this lore.

00:50:27.000 And what's the matter with finding the badge?

00:50:29.000 Is that just some other pathetic cult?

00:50:31.000 Yeah, cops could have been swastikas.

00:50:34.000 Could have been the KKK.

00:50:36.000 It's all the same sad cult at the end of the day.

00:50:40.000 And then he says these guys, their cult that they found was the skull.

00:50:45.000 And the bad guy in Captain America is this dude Red Skull.

00:50:49.000 He tells them what they've always longed to hear, that they're secretly great.

00:50:54.000 They are secretly great.

00:50:56.000 Young white males, and it's a particular group too.

00:50:59.000 Like, he doesn't care about white trash or liberals.

00:51:02.000 He cares about middle-class, religious, Christian, successful, handsome white males.

00:51:09.000 So let's not mislead everyone with white males.

00:51:11.000 They're okay with like Chris Hayes.

00:51:14.000 But the Covington Catholic schoolboys, so it's a very particular demographic within white males.

00:51:19.000 That's the enemy.

00:51:21.000 And they have to be beaten down.

00:51:22.000 And that's why, after he stood up to that guy who put the drum in his face, ABC News said, or whatever it was, USA Today, said, isn't that kind of aggressive, standing your ground?

00:51:34.000 So just standing your ground is bad.

00:51:37.000 You're not secretly great.

00:51:40.000 They think that the whole world is against them.

00:51:42.000 They are.

00:51:44.000 And that if they're truly men, they'll fight back.

00:51:47.000 Correct.

00:51:48.000 This is Captain America saying this through Taneshi Coates' voice.

00:51:53.000 And then what's the last panel?

00:51:56.000 And bingo, that's their purpose.

00:51:58.000 That's what they live for.

00:52:00.000 And that's what they'll die for.

00:52:06.000 Covington Catholic schoolboys will die.

00:52:08.000 And if you have any doubt about my hypothesis here, it's not just Jordan Peterson and I think this.

00:52:14.000 They actually quote Jordan Peterson, the bad guy in the comic book.

00:52:18.000 That's 1-9.

00:52:20.000 It better be.

00:52:22.000 Is it?

00:52:24.000 Oh, no.

00:52:27.000 That's the wrong...

00:52:28.000 That's 1-9?

00:52:32.000 Yeah.

00:52:33.000 Oh, maybe 2-0.

00:52:35.000 Try 2-0.

00:52:36.000 Okay.

00:52:38.000 Here we go.

00:52:38.000 Yeah, Jordan Peterson.

00:52:40.000 Oh, yeah, fewf.

00:52:41.000 Technical glitch there.

00:52:44.000 So if you go to the top, though, Jordan Peterson goes, what the hell?

00:52:48.000 What the hell is this?

00:52:49.000 What the?

00:52:50.000 Clean your room, Red Skull.

00:52:51.000 Somebody's room is messy as bloody hell.

00:52:54.000 Bloody, they've got the bad guy in a children's comic book.

00:52:57.000 And I say children's liberally.

00:52:58.000 I'm sure the average age of Captain America readers is 30 at this point.

00:53:04.000 Ryan doesn't read it because it's too advanced.

00:53:06.000 Yeah, I'm not there yet.

00:53:08.000 This is Kierkegaard to him.

00:53:10.000 He doesn't read German existentialists.

00:53:11.000 I'm still in my Disney Pixar.

00:53:13.000 Yeah, it's a book.

00:53:14.000 I don't read books.

00:53:16.000 No.

00:53:17.000 If there's no Buzz Light here, what's his motto, Rye Guy?

00:53:21.000 Two info.

00:53:22.000 Well, which one?

00:53:22.000 He's got a couple.

00:53:23.000 Oh, what's up?

00:53:24.000 I set my laser from stun to kill.

00:53:28.000 Wow.

00:53:28.000 Does Woody have mottos?

00:53:30.000 Yes.

00:53:31.000 What's his motto?

00:53:32.000 Hey, there's a snake in my boot.

00:53:34.000 And somebody's poisoned the water hole.

00:53:39.000 I remember those because when my child was a baby, like four, he had a Woody doll and you pulled it and it would say those things.

00:53:48.000 You're my dog.

00:53:48.000 How do you know them?

00:53:49.000 Favorite deputy.

00:53:50.000 Did you have one of those?

00:53:51.000 When I was a child, that came out.

00:53:54.000 In the early 90s, that came out.

00:53:57.000 Maybe 96, 97, latest.

00:53:59.000 I was a child and I've retained the memories.

00:54:02.000 So perhaps I'm a child for not forgetting everything I grew up with.

00:54:05.000 Okay, when did you last see a Pixar movie?

00:54:07.000 When did you see Tom and Jerry, for example?

00:54:08.000 You know, why don't we talk about it?

00:54:09.000 When did you see Tom and Jerry?

00:54:10.000 This Red Skull thing is crazy, though.

00:54:12.000 A week ago.

00:54:16.000 There we go.

00:54:17.000 Go back.

00:54:18.000 Contributors to The Atlantic.

00:54:20.000 Like Taneshi Coke.

00:54:22.000 Like, so several of them are moving on to comics?

00:54:24.000 Like Taneshes.

00:54:25.000 Jordan Peterson, let me know if any of this looks familiar.

00:54:27.000 So there's the Red Skull, and he has 10 Rules for Life, which is Jordan Peterson's book.

00:54:34.000 The villain has Jordan.

00:54:36.000 And what is Jordan Peterson's motive?

00:54:38.000 He's just telling people, but yes, particularly young people, and yes, particularly young men.

00:54:45.000 Don't be ashamed of yourself.

00:54:46.000 Clean your room.

00:54:47.000 Clean your bloody room.

00:54:48.000 Your bloody skull.

00:54:49.000 Get organized, have a goal, get in shape, eat better.

00:54:54.000 That's his agenda.

00:54:55.000 There's not a lot of round up the gypsies and put the crippled kids in a van.

00:55:00.000 But those are his rules, right?

00:55:02.000 Next to that, chaos and order, Carl Luger's genius, the feminist trap.

00:55:08.000 So now to be wary of feminism is evil and Captain America hates it.

00:55:13.000 In other words, Captain America is a human.

00:55:15.000 I mean, sorry, a feminist.

00:55:17.000 What does it say below that?

00:55:18.000 I miss this, Captain America?

00:55:22.000 Doesn't matter what the press says.

00:55:24.000 Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mob say.

00:55:26.000 Doesn't matter if the whole country decides something wrong is something right.

00:55:30.000 The nation was founded on one principle above all else.

00:55:34.000 The requirement that we stand up for what we believe.

00:55:36.000 Now they're saying the opposite.

00:55:38.000 They'll stand up and they'll die, no matter the odds or consequences.

00:55:42.000 When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move your job, no, tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth and tell the whole world, fuck off, Taneshi Coates.

00:55:55.000 No, you move.

00:55:57.000 Which is what the Covington Catholic School did.

00:55:59.000 Oh, true.

00:55:59.000 And it wasn't even like that.

00:56:01.000 He didn't say you move.

00:56:02.000 He just went.

00:56:03.000 Not being pushed aside is a crime.

00:56:06.000 Hey, look at this.

00:56:10.000 F, nothing is getting to them.

00:56:12.000 Keep yelling the buzzwords, people.

00:56:13.000 Don't listen to this.

00:56:14.000 What's that comic?

00:56:15.000 Ra.

00:56:16.000 And then it says racist Nazi.

00:56:17.000 And then it's...

00:56:18.000 I think this is a pro-Peterson comic because he turns into like a thing that kills all of them.

00:56:22.000 He turns into a huge lobster.

00:56:24.000 I don't know what this is.

00:56:25.000 Who did this?

00:56:26.000 I wish I knew.

00:56:26.000 I saw it.

00:56:27.000 I read it a couple years ago.

00:56:29.000 Yeah, lobsters are big with him, right?

00:56:31.000 I think it comes from the old Canadian joke where the guy's selling lobsters and one of them starts to get out.

00:56:37.000 And the woman says, excuse me, one of your lobsters getting out of the bucket.

00:56:40.000 And without looking behind him, he goes, oh, they're Canadian lobsters.

00:56:42.000 The others will drag them back in.

00:56:45.000 Well, he did say, Jordan Peterson said that he aligned humans to lobsters, seeing a lot of the same traits.

00:56:55.000 Really?

00:56:56.000 Yes.

00:56:57.000 I've heard him do that with rats, but lobsters are the greatest.

00:57:00.000 Oh, he did it with lobsters.

00:57:01.000 He did it with lobsters.

00:57:03.000 That's disappointing.

00:57:04.000 I fucking hate lobsters.

00:57:05.000 You like seafood, you disgusting island person.

00:57:09.000 Oh, there was a point.

00:57:10.000 All you do is eat seafood and have diarrhea for two days.

00:57:14.000 Well, there was a point where it was illegal to feed slaves more lobster more than four days a week.

00:57:22.000 Because it was so disgusting and oh, too good?

00:57:27.000 No, because, well, I'm sorry, you're right.

00:57:29.000 They felt it was crap.

00:57:32.000 Yeah.

00:57:33.000 It is.

00:57:33.000 It's a cockroach.

00:57:34.000 It's indistinguishable from an insect.

00:57:38.000 Same with shrimp.

00:57:42.000 Problem is he's facing away from me, Ryan.

00:57:44.000 I don't know.

00:57:44.000 Trying to figure that out.

00:57:46.000 Just flip the fucking ghost show.

00:57:49.000 Well, I could do this.

00:57:51.000 Here we go.

00:57:53.000 Oh, that's kind of good because he's looking at you, the screen, when he looks at the screen.

00:57:56.000 And then for you, I could flip you like this.

00:58:00.000 You can't.

00:58:02.000 What?

00:58:03.000 See, now I'm looking away from him.

00:58:05.000 Oh.

00:58:07.000 I'll have to figure it out.

00:58:11.000 Yes, and here's...

00:58:12.000 That was the previous link I was showing, 1.9, where this is how young white men are seen, a particular type of white male.

00:58:19.000 Are you getting nervous with all this talk of white males?

00:58:23.000 I'm getting excited.

00:58:26.000 No, it is.

00:58:26.000 It's a taboo thing to even defend them.

00:58:29.000 If you say white males are being persecuted, then you're a racist.

00:58:34.000 But they are.

00:58:36.000 look at this.

00:58:36.000 This is the attitude that we've developed.

00:58:47.000 Knockout game.

00:58:50.000 But there was a big story.

00:58:51.000 So everyone's talking about these Asians getting slapped, right?

00:58:55.000 And it is true.

00:58:57.000 If you go to 17B, you will see this.

00:59:04.000 I mean, we can play these for hours, right?

00:59:11.000 Black or doodle.

00:59:13.000 Or 17C.

00:59:15.000 We got it again.

00:59:23.000 But I'm telling you, it's not a black on Asian thing.

00:59:25.000 It's a crime thing.

00:59:27.000 That's why.

00:59:29.000 And there's also these two kinds of judgments.

00:59:34.000 Like those girls who hijacked the car for that Uber car, they got a plea deal with no prison time.

00:59:40.000 They murdered a man.

00:59:41.000 The Capitol Hill white males who stormed it, there we go.

00:59:45.000 This is he robbed them both, are looking at 15 to 20.

00:59:50.000 So it's a free-for-all, in a sense.

00:59:54.000 But I don't, or here's, look at 17D.

00:59:58.000 For some reason, we're not seeing these.

01:00:00.000 I don't know why.

01:00:01.000 I'm not trying to trivialize the Asian violence.

01:00:03.000 I'm just saying it's myopic take on a crime spree that's going on in this country.

01:00:09.000 And also, you can get a prop for your computer where you can look at it in a lazy boy chair.

01:00:16.000 Do we not, are they showing a commercial first?

01:00:18.000 There we go.

01:00:21.000 Yes, more violence on the street.

01:00:22.000 The 75-year-old victim punched in her face and knocked to the ground.

01:00:26.000 Now she's speaking out about this terrifying incident that happened in Harlem.

01:00:30.000 Here's eyewitness news reporter, Crystal Cranmore.

01:00:32.000 I was shaking after this happened to me because I was just so stunned.

01:00:36.000 I was just so surprised.

01:00:38.000 It came out of nowhere.

01:00:40.000 Judith Thomas's face, now bruised and swollen.

01:00:44.000 He threw a punch that was like a fighter's punch.

01:00:48.000 I know why I'm annoyed with the black on Asian thing as the focus.

01:00:52.000 Because I want the focus to be on the crime spree that happened.

01:00:55.000 And the crime spree happened because leftists said defund the police.

01:01:00.000 Everything you're seeing here, these past three videos have been about cops.

01:01:03.000 Castrated cops.

01:01:05.000 You destroyed their morale.

01:01:06.000 You took away their money.

01:01:08.000 You took away their funding.

01:01:09.000 You ruined the job.

01:01:10.000 You also said, if you do your job, I'm going to sue you and you're going to lose your $4 million pension.

01:01:16.000 So they've said, we're not coming to work.

01:01:18.000 You told us not to.

01:01:19.000 You punished us for working.

01:01:21.000 And this is what you get.

01:01:22.000 Not just Asians getting attacked.

01:01:24.000 Everyone getting attacked.

01:01:25.000 That's true.

01:01:26.000 Old white ladies.

01:01:27.000 And just walking around New York City as often as I do, I just see Asians all over the place in all parts of the city.

01:01:34.000 Well, and they also make easy prey because they don't call the cops and they tend to have money on them.

01:01:38.000 But attacks on Hasids are way up.

01:01:40.000 Right.

01:01:41.000 Which brings me to something I wanted to mention earlier when we were talking about Judaism.

01:01:45.000 There is some real nuance with anti-Semitism in New York, and I want to break it down here.

01:01:50.000 There's three types.

01:01:51.000 There's one, which is just the same as the Asian and that white woman you saw, which is just their easy prey.

01:01:56.000 If it was Amish, if it was any other group that didn't call cops and wasn't assimilated and seemed like easy prey, they'd be getting it.

01:02:06.000 So in Williamsburg right now, there's some black kid with no father on his bike whacking off one of those big fur hats and then driving away laughing.

01:02:13.000 They don't even know that guy's a Jew.

01:02:15.000 They don't know what he is.

01:02:16.000 He's just easy prey, right?

01:02:18.000 So don't put any intellectual gravitas on that.

01:02:21.000 That's just violent assholes.

01:02:23.000 I don't even call it anti-Semitic.

01:02:26.000 It's anti-strong.

01:02:28.000 The second kind is much deeper, and that's in Crown Heights, Brooklyn.

01:02:33.000 That's Nation of Islam, Black Hebrew-Israelites.

01:02:37.000 They hate Jews, and they're not the real Jews.

01:02:40.000 We're the real people of Zion and all that shit.

01:02:42.000 And that's when you see the Orthodox Jews killed in the kosher deli.

01:02:46.000 That's when you see the guy killed upstate.

01:02:48.000 That's when you see them saying, they're coming in our neighborhood, and they're pushing us out, and they're raising the price.

01:02:53.000 I think that's kind of racist, too, in the sense that they see Jews as the ultimate whites.

01:02:59.000 So that's a different kind of bullshit anti-Semitism that's based on hocus pocus.

01:03:06.000 I mean, the black Hebrew-Israelite background and the nation of Islam is just ludicrous.

01:03:10.000 It's science fiction.

01:03:11.000 It's Scientology.

01:03:14.000 And then there's a third kind.

01:03:15.000 I don't think I included this in the notes.

01:03:17.000 You have to dig it up.

01:03:18.000 But yesterday, a Jewish family got kicked off a plane.

01:03:22.000 And it's a third kind of anti-Semitism that's not rooted in any hocus-pocus, and it's not random violence.

01:03:28.000 It's just basic, the same racism that everyone talks about during Jim Crow.

01:03:34.000 Like, I don't like you.

01:03:36.000 And I think they see, and this is blacks with authority who just, they think, oh, you think you're better than me?

01:03:43.000 So what you're seeing, it's just stop here.

01:03:45.000 What you're seeing here is a third kind of anti-Semitism that is just like, I don't like you.

01:03:50.000 I see you as the ultimate whites.

01:03:51.000 And I'm going to use my authority to punish you because you're a Jew.

01:03:55.000 And it's hard to detect.

01:03:57.000 It's very elusive.

01:03:58.000 And I've noticed this strange bigotry with gays and women.

01:04:02.000 I'll never forget my mom was posing.

01:04:04.000 My mom whoops.

01:04:07.000 Thank God my wife doesn't watch this show.

01:04:09.000 I mean, she is a mom, my wife.

01:04:12.000 Right.

01:04:12.000 My kids' mom, my wife, is a fag hag, and she was posing with Jeremy Scott and all these are gay friends.

01:04:19.000 And one of them shooed her out of the frame.

01:04:23.000 And he said, this one's for the boys, honey.

01:04:25.000 And she was like, oh.

01:04:27.000 And I was pissed off.

01:04:30.000 And I thought, oh, that's, it just reared its ugly head.

01:04:32.000 It doesn't show up a lot, but the gays, they're like, hi, honey.

01:04:35.000 Yeah, I love you too.

01:04:36.000 Fuck off.

01:04:38.000 And that's what I'm seeing here is this sort of deep-seated latent bigotry that's not obvious and has reared its ugly head.

01:04:47.000 Very dissimilar from anti-Semitism one and two.

01:04:58.000 So they had masks on.

01:05:00.000 They had their daughter eat.

01:05:01.000 You're not supposed to have the tray table down, I guess, is another non-compliance thing, but it's not a big deal.

01:05:06.000 The kid can sit on a lap, that's fine.

01:05:08.000 She's two, that's allowed.

01:05:10.000 They have a special seatbelt for two-year-olds.

01:05:12.000 So the kid doesn't have a mask on.

01:05:14.000 Two-year-olds don't need masks, especially when they're eating fucking yogurt.

01:05:18.000 And yeah, I'm sorry the tray's down.

01:05:20.000 We'll get it up soon.

01:05:20.000 She's hungry.

01:05:22.000 If they're going anywhere near Israel, this is a long flight.

01:05:28.000 They're probably going to LA from New York or something like that.

01:05:31.000 And this is, what's the black airline?

01:05:33.000 Oh, yeah, Spirit Airlines.

01:05:34.000 This is Spirit Airlines.

01:05:36.000 So it's more like Soul Plane.

01:05:38.000 The Soul Plane, yeah.

01:05:39.000 Which we took.

01:05:40.000 Remember, where were we going again?

01:05:42.000 Zimbabwe.

01:05:43.000 Yes.

01:05:44.000 I think Florida.

01:05:46.000 Florida.

01:05:47.000 Oh, yeah, for Laura Loomer's thing.

01:05:56.000 It's not really the clip.

01:05:57.000 I don't really need to go to a rave.

01:06:05.000 And then they de-plane the whole flight.

01:06:07.000 Wow.

01:06:12.000 See, this isn't as simple as non-compliance.

01:06:15.000 This is an elusive bigotry that I am such a good detective.

01:06:20.000 I discovered it.

01:06:21.000 Don't you think because there are certain protected classes of race and then there aren't, that kind of funnels hate towards the unprotected class?

01:06:30.000 Because like, well, nobody's aware of their plight, so I could attack them more.

01:06:33.000 They matter less.

01:06:34.000 They don't have commercials saying white lives matter.

01:06:37.000 Jewish lives.

01:06:37.000 Why erase hate?

01:06:38.000 Hate has no home here.

01:06:39.000 Congratulations.

01:06:40.000 You got it out of one house.

01:06:41.000 It's like rats.

01:06:42.000 It's going to be somewhere, everywhere.

01:06:45.000 So all you can do is have exterminators.

01:06:47.000 Pest control.

01:06:48.000 We had pest control.

01:06:49.000 New York was utopia.

01:06:52.000 It was Wakanda.

01:06:54.000 Times Square, you could walk around nude at 3 in the morning with $100 bills glued to your tits.

01:06:59.000 Hi, come get me.

01:07:00.000 No problem.

01:07:01.000 Now it's a fucking disgusting war zone.

01:07:05.000 Bums everywhere.

01:07:06.000 Guys checking their Macy's rip-off stuff.

01:07:09.000 People jumping in front of garbage trucks.

01:07:11.000 Most stores that I know of in Manhattan will buzz you in.

01:07:15.000 They look outside and they wait to see if you reek and if you have a pet rat.

01:07:20.000 And then they buzz you in.

01:07:21.000 Because you're a rat.

01:07:22.000 Rats will just wander in.

01:07:25.000 Or if you are a rat, yeah.

01:07:27.000 And it's because we got rid of pest control.

01:07:31.000 We got rid of crime fighters.

01:07:33.000 So normally you would have, no, you can't hit Asians, you can't hit Hasidic Jews, but then we erase the law.

01:07:39.000 And what happens when you erase the law?

01:07:41.000 People get violent.

01:07:43.000 If we tell them that white males are human garbage, I'm going to go punch one in the face.

01:07:47.000 I won't go to jail if I punch someone.

01:07:49.000 Well, I'm going to go punch Asians actually because they never get up.

01:07:53.000 I'm going to go punch some old lady randomly.

01:07:55.000 I'm going to box her.

01:07:56.000 That guy in Harlem boxed her.

01:07:58.000 Or I'm going to, if I'm going to get away with it, you're not going to punish me.

01:08:02.000 I'm going to fucking hijack a car.

01:08:05.000 I'll call an Uber and then I'll have a taser and I'll just fucking zap him and then he'll freak out and get out of the car.

01:08:12.000 And if he doesn't, I'll drive it at 150 miles an hour around a corner.

01:08:18.000 And then if he goes flying out and dies, I'll get like probation.

01:08:21.000 Why not?

01:08:23.000 The cops won't arrest me.

01:08:24.000 And that's the latest with those two girls who did exactly that, 2-1.

01:08:30.000 They got a plea deal.

01:08:31.000 They got probation for murdering a man.

01:08:34.000 I mean, if I take my dad, I can brainwash him into robbing a bank with me, and he's crying the whole time, saying, this is a big mistake.

01:08:44.000 And then I shoot a guard, he's going to jail for murder with me.

01:08:48.000 You're an accessory.

01:08:50.000 I don't think that's a good idea.

01:08:52.000 No, I have to make a point.

01:08:54.000 I have to say, I have to prove it.

01:08:57.000 But click on the link there.

01:09:00.000 Zero jail time.

01:09:01.000 Max and John, four years in prison.

01:09:04.000 Everyone has stormed the Capitol.

01:09:05.000 Insane sentences looming over them.

01:09:08.000 Domestic terrorism.

01:09:09.000 Treason, which is a capital offense.

01:09:11.000 So the death penalty is looming over them.

01:09:13.000 And this is fine.

01:09:14.000 But click on it.

01:09:15.000 In case...

01:09:16.000 Have you seen this?

01:09:17.000 No.

01:09:18.000 Oh, you got to see this.

01:09:20.000 I did read about it, but I haven't seen the clip.

01:09:22.000 It's disturbing.

01:09:23.000 We've already shown it on the show a couple times, but our guest needs to see it.

01:09:26.000 Scroll down.

01:09:27.000 That's the guy who's dead.

01:09:29.000 A carjacking turns deadly in DC when two teen girls try to steal an Uber Eats driver's car.

01:09:35.000 Just released cell phone video shows the shocking moments when he refuses to get out.

01:09:40.000 He's probably from Lahore, Pakistan.

01:09:42.000 He's used to miscreants trying to rob and kill him.

01:09:53.000 First, they smash him on the pole.

01:09:57.000 Then they make an arcing right turn that the car can't handle.

01:10:00.000 He goes flying like garbage.

01:10:02.000 That was a real collision you heard.

01:10:04.000 And then see if they show the remainder.

01:10:07.000 I like when girls wear fake glasses on TV to seem smart.

01:10:10.000 There it is.

01:10:11.000 Oh, they're not going to show it.

01:10:13.000 His body is lying on the sidewalk like a piece of garbage.

01:10:17.000 And she's worried about her phone.

01:10:19.000 She's like, where's my fucking phone?

01:10:20.000 Trying to get her cell phone.

01:10:21.000 And then there's military dudes there trying to organize everything.

01:10:24.000 And no one's even looking at the body.

01:10:26.000 He's face down all askew.

01:10:29.000 Under a fence.

01:10:30.000 Teenage schoolgirls.

01:10:32.000 It's bizarre.

01:10:34.000 Not one person even looks at him.

01:10:36.000 There he was there.

01:10:38.000 Do they show it there?

01:10:40.000 Oh, he's behind me.

01:10:40.000 He's a blurred image.

01:10:42.000 And they're all just standing around walking past him.

01:10:44.000 His name, no one's repeating his name.

01:10:47.000 He has raised over, I think it's over a million dollars now with the GoFundMe, which is good.

01:10:51.000 All right.

01:10:52.000 Well, even with my dad, I'd rather have my dad than the money.

01:10:56.000 And I have one of the worst dads in America.

01:10:59.000 Oh, just a moment.

01:11:00.000 And I'm probably not going to have him for much longer.

01:11:02.000 Just one of the worst.

01:11:03.000 Not necessarily the worst.

01:11:05.000 Wouldn't that suck if I said, I wouldn't take a million dollars for a dead dad?

01:11:08.000 No, thank you.

01:11:08.000 And then you died like four days later.

01:11:10.000 You're like, you know, I always said like, how much would we paid to get raped by a bum?

01:11:15.000 And people are like, no fucking way.

01:11:16.000 Not $7 million?

01:11:17.000 No way.

01:11:17.000 And then that day on your walk home, you get raped by a bump.

01:11:19.000 Raped by a bum for free.

01:11:20.000 For free.

01:11:24.000 Or it's even just bad to go, I took the 7 million.

01:11:27.000 I mean, I thought, what if I get raped on the way home?

01:11:29.000 I'd be kicking myself.

01:11:30.000 Right.

01:11:31.000 Here's the problem with getting raped by a bum for 7 million.

01:11:34.000 There's only one problem.

01:11:35.000 You're in the luxury home in the indoor pool, and your friends are over, and they go, this is fantastic.

01:11:41.000 You got all this from your stupid show?

01:11:43.000 And you go, no, it was something different.

01:11:46.000 Anyway, who wants more drinks?

01:11:47.000 I know, what was it?

01:11:48.000 Are you a Bitcoin guy?

01:11:50.000 I didn't know you were a trader.

01:11:51.000 I don't want to talk about it, okay?

01:11:53.000 Enjoy the fucking pool.

01:11:56.000 So the way you get away with that is you do it for $10 million.

01:11:59.000 $3 million you donate to an entrepreneur's fund to help young guys, young women too, start businesses.

01:12:07.000 And then the $7 million you keep so you can go, oh, I started an entrepreneur's fund, among other things that were really bad.

01:12:14.000 It's all about what to say during the breaststroke.

01:12:17.000 Another thing I like to say during the breaststroke is, are you liking this?

01:12:20.000 Is this good?

01:12:25.000 Chauvin update.

01:12:26.000 Dad was watching that all day.

01:12:28.000 Boring as shit.

01:12:29.000 But I thought this was interesting that remember we said I can't really see where his knee is.

01:12:36.000 He's wearing black pants.

01:12:38.000 The pictures of George Floyd we had were very black.

01:12:40.000 And it's obviously, you know, with foreshortening.

01:12:43.000 I have two hands, believe it or not.

01:12:45.000 Not one.

01:12:46.000 Whoop, whoop.

01:12:47.000 So you couldn't really tell exactly the depth of field where his knee was.

01:12:51.000 Now that we have this police camera footage, which we could have done this in a day, by the way.

01:12:58.000 It looks like it's on the fucking shoulder blade, which I believe is in the training manual, right?

01:13:04.000 This is how people convince you that they have your nose in their hand and it wiggles.

01:13:09.000 Police stole George Floyd's nose, refused to give it back.

01:13:13.000 From the perspective of Miss Police Frazier...

01:13:16.000 They removed George Floyd's thumb from his.

01:13:20.000 And they removed a coin from his ear, which is theft.

01:13:23.000 It's on the neck of Mr. Floyd.

01:13:27.000 Yes, sir.

01:13:29.000 Right there.

01:13:29.000 That was important.

01:13:30.000 Perspective of Miss Frazier's camera.

01:13:34.000 It appears that Officer Chauvin's knee is on the neck of Mr. Floyd.

01:13:41.000 Yes, sir.

01:13:47.000 How many rioters are watching this footage or giving a flying fuck if he's guilty or not?

01:13:54.000 That's a thing.

01:13:55.000 You could sit down any of these rioters, these imminent rioters, and prove to them beyond a shadow of a doubt that he's innocent.

01:14:01.000 They go, fuck you, I'm rioting anyway.

01:14:06.000 You're boring, dude.

01:14:07.000 I'm already bored, by the way.

01:14:11.000 So the pivotal moment when he tried to pause on it, the player came back up and kind of obscured it.

01:14:16.000 But this is the result.

01:14:27.000 Yes.

01:14:28.000 Yes, but I'm trying to throw him under the bus.

01:14:32.000 Well, say yes reluctantly.

01:14:34.000 Right, I guess.

01:14:37.000 I don't want to get in more shit for lying.

01:14:41.000 And then, of course, final racism bit.

01:14:44.000 Georgia has been punished for daring to ask that blacks have ID to vote.

01:14:49.000 And now it's over to Colorado.

01:14:51.000 Denver, Colorado is where the all-star game will be.

01:14:56.000 Colorado has voter ID.

01:14:59.000 And by the way, it's the Coors field.

01:15:01.000 Joseph Coors once famously said, I don't like blacks in my factories.

01:15:05.000 They don't have the IQ to do the job.

01:15:07.000 Anyone who's worked with them can see that.

01:15:09.000 That's what he said.

01:15:12.000 Now, his son is running it now, and his son is like, black power, black lives matter.

01:15:16.000 My dad, I hate my dad, which I can sympathize with.

01:15:19.000 But yeah, it's six of one, half a dozen or the other.

01:15:23.000 You're going to find racism in everything.

01:15:25.000 But I guess because Colorado does mostly mail-in votes, and you can use a utility bill, then it's slightly less voter suppression.

01:15:34.000 So they've won now.

01:15:35.000 Well, what does that tweet say?

01:15:39.000 Atlanta is 62% black, Denver is 10% black, and Colorado requires voter ID.

01:15:47.000 Says it all.

01:15:48.000 Very prescient tweets today.

01:15:49.000 Okay, I want to jump to COVID because I've been saving a nuclear bomb here that really sums up most of the shit we care about on this show, which is liars.

01:16:00.000 You know, for a show that's so anti-liar, we should have something about the truth at the end of our get fired, get in trouble.

01:16:08.000 Oh, I see.

01:16:08.000 Because Tucker says lies.

01:16:11.000 Pomposity is his thing.

01:16:13.000 I don't mind pomposity.

01:16:15.000 The other pomposity.

01:16:16.000 I like the odd monocle and fancy cheese.

01:16:20.000 I want to eat a $200 steak that's this big.

01:16:23.000 They're delicious.

01:16:24.000 One time I bought my dad this fancy steak in Costa Rica.

01:16:27.000 It was called the Diablo.

01:16:29.000 It had hot peppercorns on it.

01:16:30.000 And he's like, oh my God, this is absolutely delicious, my boy.

01:16:35.000 Oh.

01:16:35.000 And I go, you know that steak you're eating is 50 bucks?

01:16:38.000 Which in New York, by the way, is dirt cheap.

01:16:40.000 Like Keene's is 250 bucks.

01:16:43.000 And as I said that, this is a Scotsman, how cheap they are.

01:16:46.000 Like King Midas in reverse, it turned to shit in his mouth.

01:16:50.000 He just went, oh, it fell out of his mouth.

01:16:54.000 It became feces the second I said the price.

01:16:57.000 And I don't think you finished it.

01:16:58.000 Try to return it.

01:16:59.000 Well, I couldn't.

01:17:00.000 And then you went to a disgusting shithole that the fishermen eat at called Hotel Montezuma.

01:17:05.000 Like, now that place is delicious.

01:17:08.000 It's not pretentious like Homer de Mar.

01:17:15.000 But you have to, I mean, I'm cheap too.

01:17:18.000 The fact that I had to spend $600 on my motorbike this week for a tune-up and the front calipers and some electrical still haunts me like I had an abortion.

01:17:27.000 Yeah, you consider riding it around like a scooter, like just pedaling.

01:17:30.000 It's just a garbage thing.

01:17:31.000 I don't go on road trips with it.

01:17:33.000 $600.

01:17:33.000 I thought, I'm going to be generous.

01:17:34.000 And this guy's, it's a tough time.

01:17:36.000 If he says $350, $400, fine.

01:17:40.000 $600.

01:17:41.000 And I lost $100 fucking bucks last night with Guillermo.

01:17:46.000 Jacob deGrom pitched, I don't know, seven perfect innings.

01:17:51.000 Just strike out, strike out.

01:17:52.000 He's averaging 98 miles an hour now.

01:17:54.000 Then we get who I used to like, Guillermo, because he wore funny socks.

01:17:58.000 He comes out.

01:17:58.000 We get all these new Shit pictures.

01:18:00.000 They're throwing it in like it's a softball.

01:18:03.000 They're hitting it literally out of the park.

01:18:06.000 We go from a 2-0 win to a 2-5 loss.

01:18:10.000 Sorry, a 3-5 loss.

01:18:11.000 We got one run in at the end.

01:18:13.000 And this happened after the seventh inning.

01:18:16.000 Money falling from the sky.

01:18:18.000 Why do we kick him out after the eighth?

01:18:22.000 The shitty picture?

01:18:24.000 Yes.

01:18:24.000 They did.

01:18:25.000 I think we went through three shitty pictures after DeGrom.

01:18:29.000 And he couldn't go back in.

01:18:31.000 No, I don't know why not.

01:18:32.000 I don't understand baseball very well.

01:18:34.000 Let's just have him there till his arm falls off.

01:18:37.000 Well, exactly.

01:18:38.000 Yeah.

01:18:39.000 Or at least get some kind of closer.

01:18:41.000 We haven't had a good closer ever.

01:18:44.000 And DeGrom, I'm starting to feel like a fat, ugly guy dating a supermodel.

01:18:50.000 Like, he surely must want to lose us.

01:18:53.000 He keeps winning games for us.

01:18:55.000 I should ask my son that how many times he's won a game and then said, all right, we good?

01:19:00.000 Everyone good?

01:19:01.000 I'm going to go take a shit.

01:19:02.000 And he comes out of the bathroom.

01:19:04.000 We lost.

01:19:05.000 Sorry.

01:19:07.000 Are you mad?

01:19:09.000 Yeah, I am pretty mad.

01:19:12.000 I'm very mad.

01:19:13.000 I've done my part.

01:19:14.000 I'm Cy Young twice now.

01:19:16.000 I'm about to be put in the Baseball Hall of Fame.

01:19:18.000 I'm probably the second best pitcher of all time.

01:19:21.000 And I'm a little annoyed with you guys.

01:19:24.000 A little annoyed.

01:19:25.000 I am done.

01:19:26.000 You're done.

01:19:27.000 I'm done.

01:19:28.000 Yeah, that's going to be DeGrom's last words to the Mets.

01:19:31.000 This is you after placing a bet on the Mets.

01:19:33.000 I'm never going to financially recover from this.

01:19:36.000 Well, the good thing about cheap people is I made 100 on the previous game.

01:19:42.000 Not in Pence game, but it was Oakland A's, I think.

01:19:46.000 So I'm at zero.

01:19:47.000 So that's not a crisis yet.

01:19:52.000 All right, sorry.

01:19:53.000 COVID.

01:19:54.000 Covered a lot of ground, your language requires a paintbrush to write.

01:19:58.000 Your language sucks.

01:20:00.000 Your language is stupid.

01:20:02.000 Fucking Chinese.

01:20:03.000 Chinese virus goes from China.

01:20:06.000 Chinese asshole!

01:20:07.000 Just keep your hands off my dog.

01:20:12.000 What do you think of that theory?

01:20:15.000 That it came from a dog?

01:20:16.000 No, that if your language requires a paintbrush to write, it's stupid.

01:20:23.000 Well, how the hell do you use a computer then?

01:20:26.000 Their keyboards must be this wide.

01:20:29.000 Every fucking thing.

01:20:30.000 The word for man on a boat is a drawing of a man on a boat.

01:20:34.000 What are you, a cave person?

01:20:36.000 My friend Mercedes was like, no, it's actually very mathematical.

01:20:40.000 You'd use algorithms and no, it's drawings.

01:20:43.000 Or the Middle East, all their flags.

01:20:45.000 They'll have writing on the flag that's stupid paintbrush writing.

01:20:48.000 And then on the other side, they have to invert it.

01:20:51.000 So the Iraqi flag, I believe, has two sides.

01:20:54.000 So it reads correctly on the other side.

01:20:57.000 Yeah, this is West.

01:20:59.000 Because the sun is rising something about the horizon.

01:21:04.000 Yeah.

01:21:04.000 You know what?

01:21:05.000 Just write the word West.

01:21:08.000 At least Korea said this is stupid.

01:21:10.000 Hey, smartest person in the country.

01:21:12.000 Who, me?

01:21:13.000 Yeah, the top professor at the top university?

01:21:15.000 Hi.

01:21:16.000 Can you make a better language?

01:21:18.000 Like, English is awesome.

01:21:19.000 Okay, I'll make a better English.

01:21:21.000 And he did.

01:21:22.000 It's just circles and lines, and it's something like 22 characters.

01:21:26.000 I don't know what we have, 26?

01:21:27.000 Yeah.

01:21:27.000 The Phoenicians made the 26-letter alphabet.

01:21:30.000 So they're pretty dope.

01:21:31.000 Good.

01:21:32.000 Korea, all power to you.

01:21:34.000 You still sound stupid.

01:21:35.000 Yeah.

01:21:38.000 That's a very efficient language.

01:21:40.000 Chinese, Middle Eastern, gotta go.

01:21:42.000 Sorry.

01:21:43.000 Anyway, I've been waiting to show.

01:21:45.000 I don't know if you've seen this, Dad.

01:21:46.000 I'm very excited to show you this.

01:21:47.000 Remember yesterday we showed Ron DeSantis.

01:21:50.000 So Ron DeSantis is an evil person, according to the left.

01:21:53.000 And he did a pay-to-play where Public said, here, I'll give you $100,000, which, by the way, running for governor is nothing.

01:22:01.000 Millions is a big donation.

01:22:04.000 $100,000?

01:22:05.000 He probably spent that on pamphlets in one hour.

01:22:07.000 But anyway, I'll give you $100,000, but I want something for it.

01:22:11.000 Okay, I'll do the vaccinations at your place where you'll make, what did they make?

01:22:17.000 $100,000?

01:22:18.000 Great.

01:22:19.000 Pay to play.

01:22:20.000 So some dumb bitch interviews him here.

01:22:23.000 Then in post, they add a rebuttal that doesn't make sense because the rebuttal says he didn't talk to everyone.

01:22:29.000 They find someone from the Glades.

01:22:30.000 What?

01:22:31.000 I don't know Florida real estate perfectly, but that doesn't sound like the area he's talking about.

01:22:35.000 And then he says, this is a bullshit narrative, and they cut it.

01:22:39.000 So the unedited footage has emerged.

01:22:42.000 And this is brilliant because he said, I'm not doing a show with you.

01:22:45.000 I'm not doing an interview with you because he knows they can edit it.

01:22:47.000 But you can come to one of my press conferences.

01:22:49.000 That's free to all press.

01:22:51.000 And then the truth will come out.

01:22:52.000 This is very Trumpian 4D chess, by the way.

01:22:56.000 Because they hanged themselves.

01:22:57.000 So we'll just refresh ourselves with the first clip that we saw yesterday.

01:23:01.000 But he declined our request for an interview.

01:23:04.000 We caught up with him south of the window.

01:23:06.000 Publix, as you know, donated $100,000 to your campaign, and then you rewarded them with the exclusive rights to distribute the vaccination in the future.

01:23:16.000 So first of all, what you're saying is wrong.

01:23:17.000 How is that not paid a punch?

01:23:19.000 That's a fake narrative.

01:23:20.000 I met with the county mayor.

01:23:21.000 I met with the administrator.

01:23:22.000 I met with all the folks at Palm Beach County, and I said, here's some of the options.

01:23:26.000 We can do more drive-through sites.

01:23:28.000 We can give more to hospitals.

01:23:30.000 We can do the Publix.

01:23:31.000 And they said, we think that would be the easiest thing for our residents.

01:23:34.000 But Melissa McKinley, the county commissioner in the Glades, told us the governor never met with her about the Publix deal.

01:23:42.000 The criticism is that it's pay-to-play, governmental.

01:23:44.000 It's wrong.

01:23:45.000 It's a fake narrative.

01:23:46.000 I just disabused you of the narrative.

01:23:48.000 And you don't care about the facts because obviously I laid it out for you in a way that is irrefutable.

01:23:54.000 And so it's clearly...

01:23:55.000 It didn't sound irrefutable.

01:23:56.000 No, no, no.

01:23:57.000 You're wrong.

01:23:58.000 You're wrong.

01:23:58.000 That's actually a fact.

01:24:03.000 So you can't hear her as well.

01:24:04.000 So first of all, what you're saying is wrong.

01:24:07.000 That's a fake narrative.

01:24:08.000 So first of all, when we did the first pharmacies that had it were CVS and Walgreens long-term care mission.

01:24:16.000 So they were going to the long-term care facilities.

01:24:18.000 They got vaccine in the middle of December.

01:24:21.000 They started going to the long-term care facilities the third week of December to do LTCs.

01:24:26.000 So that was their mission.

01:24:28.000 That was very important.

01:24:29.000 And we trusted Them to do that as we got into January.

01:24:32.000 We wanted to expand the distribution points.

01:24:35.000 So, yes, you had the counties, you had some drive-through sites, you had hospitals that were doing a lot, but we wanted to get it into communities more.

01:24:42.000 So, we reached out to other retail pharmacies, Publix, Walmart.

01:24:46.000 Obviously, CBS and Walgreens had to finish that mission.

01:24:49.000 And we said we're going to use you.

01:24:51.000 60 minutes, you said it was an exclusive to Publix.

01:24:54.000 Now it looks like plenty of people had it, and you chose Publix at the very end after a democratic decision.

01:25:01.000 I mean, I was there.

01:25:02.000 That's 100% true.

01:25:04.000 And where did you get it?

01:25:05.000 I got it in a Velusia County Fair.

01:25:08.000 Oh, really?

01:25:09.000 Yes.

01:25:10.000 So there's like snacks, a ride, a vaccine?

01:25:13.000 Well, it's not really, you know, the county fair isn't really operating now.

01:25:20.000 Oh, okay.

01:25:20.000 They just use the premises.

01:25:21.000 Oh, I see.

01:25:22.000 So you've got a big tent there.

01:25:23.000 It's outside.

01:25:24.000 Yeah, an enormous tent, yes.

01:25:26.000 And it's incredibly well organized.

01:25:30.000 So you just phone up, and they'll give you an appointment.

01:25:34.000 Well, it sounds like what DeSantis did was use trial and error.

01:25:39.000 Yes.

01:25:41.000 As I say, almost everybody I know, you know, they're all older people, obviously, most of them have had it done at the Velusia County Fair.

01:25:50.000 Huh.

01:25:52.000 Yeah.

01:25:52.000 Well, I saw another interview with him where he said, they said, why didn't you handle it?

01:25:57.000 You gave this to the hospitals.

01:25:58.000 And he goes, it would be a disaster for the government to try to handle 100% of these vaccines.

01:26:02.000 We let hospitals handle it, healthcare professionals handle it.

01:26:05.000 And then you have New York, where the opposite is true, and the government is determined to handle 100% of it.

01:26:11.000 So they go, there's a big boat at Chelsea Piers here in this city that they could have used.

01:26:19.000 No one went on it because it would make Trump look good.

01:26:21.000 And then we have a hospital we built in Central Park, just like the fair.

01:26:25.000 Yes.

01:26:25.000 No, that was Trump's idea.

01:26:26.000 That would make it look good.

01:26:27.000 Just like hydroxychloroquine would make Trump look good.

01:26:30.000 Just like getting the vaccine out too early would make him look good.

01:26:33.000 So they thwarted it at every turn.

01:26:36.000 Well, to be fair, you know, it was Biden who saved the day, you know, because he started the vaccine.

01:26:43.000 There was nothing there when he came in.

01:26:45.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:26:46.000 Well, Trump's only 100 million people in 100 days, and Biden's managed to do 200 million people in 200 days.

01:26:56.000 Well, I think Joe forgot he got vaccinated in December.

01:27:00.000 Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:27:03.000 But go ahead with that clip.

01:27:07.000 For the publics, they were the first one to raise their hand, say they were ready to go.

01:27:11.000 And you know what?

01:27:12.000 We did it on a trial basis.

01:27:13.000 I had three counties.

01:27:15.000 I actually showed up that weekend and talked to seniors across four different Publix.

01:27:20.000 How was the experience?

01:27:21.000 Is this good?

01:27:21.000 Should you think this is a way to go?

01:27:23.000 And it was 100% positive.

01:27:25.000 So we expanded it, and then folks liked it.

01:27:28.000 And I can tell you, if you look at a place like Palm Beach County, they were kind of struggling at first in terms of the senior numbers.

01:27:36.000 I went, I met with the county mayor, I met with the administrator, I met with all the folks at Palm Beach County, and I said, here are some of the options.

01:27:43.000 We can do more drive-through sites.

01:27:44.000 We can get more to hospitals.

01:27:46.000 We can do the Publix.

01:27:47.000 We can do this.

01:27:48.000 They calculated that 90% of their seniors live within a mile and a half of a Publix.

01:27:53.000 And they said, we think that would be the easiest thing for our residents.

01:27:56.000 So we did that.

01:27:57.000 And what ended up happening was, you had 65 Publix in Palm Beach.

01:28:01.000 Palm Beach is one of the biggest counties, one of the most elderly counties.

01:28:05.000 We've done almost 75% of the seniors in Palm Beach.

01:28:09.000 And the reason is because you have the strong retail footprint.

01:28:12.000 So our multifaceted.

01:28:15.000 It has worked.

01:28:16.000 And we're also now very much expanding CVS and Walgreens now that they've completed the long-term care mission.

01:28:22.000 Yes?

01:28:23.000 See, this is why people are talking about him as the next Trump.

01:28:27.000 You can let him say that.

01:28:27.000 The hand movements, too.

01:28:29.000 And you don't care about the facts because obviously I laid it out for you in a way that is irrelevant.

01:28:33.000 That you'll edit.

01:28:34.000 And so it's clearly not.

01:28:36.000 Do you think there's any chance?

01:28:37.000 You use the word disabused, which is a great word.

01:28:40.000 You've been abused by the business.

01:28:40.000 The only way you can survive as a politician today is to be able to take on the media.

01:28:44.000 And the media cheat and steal.

01:28:46.000 They kick you in the balls.

01:28:47.000 They fight dirty.

01:28:49.000 So you have to know how to block punch and still be noble about it.

01:28:52.000 Still use the, what is it called?

01:28:54.000 The Queen's rules for boxing?

01:28:55.000 Queensbury rules.

01:28:56.000 Queensbury rules.

01:28:57.000 You have to use the Queensbury rules, but you have to block shots to the nuts and biting and stuff.

01:29:02.000 And he does that beautifully.

01:29:03.000 He says disabuse.

01:29:04.000 He knows they're going to fake edit him later.

01:29:06.000 So he refuses to meet them in their studio on their time.

01:29:10.000 And he fights back.

01:29:11.000 And that's a real talent in this day and age.

01:29:14.000 Trump had it.

01:29:14.000 It's very Trump-y.

01:29:16.000 And the hand movements and everything, it's pretty great.

01:29:18.000 Yeah.

01:29:19.000 But then it's so different with Justin Trudeau because he filters the news, the news media.

01:29:26.000 So only his favorite newsmen get to answer questions.

01:29:31.000 Right?

01:29:32.000 Get to ask questions.

01:29:32.000 Yeah.

01:29:33.000 Well, that's where Biden is going to.

01:29:35.000 So I should clarify.

01:29:37.000 The only way you could survive as a right-wing politician today is to be able to fight fair, but fight against someone who fights dirty.

01:29:45.000 Liberal politicians, I mean, we saw Biden's cheat sheet.

01:29:48.000 He had the people circled with little pictures.

01:29:52.000 Pictures.

01:29:53.000 But here's another part of that scoop.

01:29:56.000 2.5.

01:29:57.000 A local politician there said, I offered to talk to 60 Minutes and they turned me down because I didn't fit their narrative.

01:30:04.000 Now, this is going to take some finangling because it's hard for me to read.

01:30:08.000 So Mayor Dave Kerner, blow that up.

01:30:13.000 I watched the 60-minute segment on the Palm Beach County last night and feel compelled to issue the statement.

01:30:17.000 The reporting was not just based on bad information, it was intentionally false.

01:30:21.000 I know this because I offered to provide my insight into Palm Beach.

01:30:26.000 Just zoom out a bit.

01:30:27.000 I can handle it.

01:30:28.000 A little smaller.

01:30:30.000 A little bigger.

01:30:31.000 A little smaller.

01:30:32.000 I only got two.

01:30:33.000 There we go.

01:30:34.000 How's this?

01:30:36.000 That's fine.

01:30:36.000 Perfect.

01:30:38.000 I know this because I offered to provide my insight into Palm Beach County's vaccination efforts, and 60 minutes declined.

01:30:44.000 They know that the governor came to Palm Beach County and met with me and the county administrator, and we asked to expand the state's partnership with Publix to Palm Beach County, which is what he just said, because seniors are within one mile, 90%.

01:31:00.000 We also discussed our own local plans to expand mass vaccination centers throughout the country, which the governor has been incredibly supportive.

01:31:06.000 We asked, and he delivered.

01:31:08.000 They had that information and they left it out because it kneecaps their narrative.

01:31:12.000 Great word.

01:31:13.000 We have confronted this pandemic for over a year.

01:31:15.000 Our residents, like all Americans, are tired, blah, blah, blah.

01:31:18.000 60 minutes should be a shame.

01:31:19.000 I thank the governor for supporting the residents of Palm Beach County because of his efforts.

01:31:23.000 75%, all that other stuff there, he said.

01:31:26.000 Quarter million seniors in the county.

01:31:28.000 Isn't that amazing?

01:31:28.000 Just over 75% of the total senior population.

01:31:31.000 That's ridiculous.

01:31:32.000 This is why people hate the media because all they do is fucking lie.

01:31:37.000 And then last two things on COVID, 2.6.

01:31:43.000 The blacks seem to suffer worse from COVID.

01:31:46.000 I thought it was because they, at least in the hood, at least in New York, none of them were wearing masks or doing the six feeding, especially in like East New York, Bushwick.

01:31:55.000 They were doing the six feet undering and killing each other.

01:31:58.000 South Bronx.

01:32:00.000 No one.

01:32:01.000 But it turns out they obviously lack vitamin D, right?

01:32:05.000 We're white because we don't get enough sun, so we have to have every morsel we can get.

01:32:10.000 They can block out the sun with their melanin because they got too much in Africa.

01:32:15.000 Then they come to America, they're not getting enough, so most have a vitamin D deficiency.

01:32:20.000 Vitamin D turns out to be a crucial part of fighting COVID.

01:32:24.000 So it's actually purely biological and has nothing to do with racism, believe it or not.

01:32:32.000 If blacks trip and get a soaker, it's not racism.

01:32:36.000 A soaker.

01:32:37.000 I think the majority of Americans have a vitamin D deficiency to begin with.

01:32:41.000 And so add being black on top of that.

01:32:44.000 Where'd you get that from?

01:32:46.000 Dr. Rhonda Patrick.

01:32:47.000 It's encouraged that everybody take vitamin D3 supplements.

01:32:51.000 And I do.

01:32:52.000 Did you take a Biden pill?

01:32:53.000 Why are you speaking rationally and saying intelligent things?

01:32:56.000 No, I took the vitamin Biden B6 shot.

01:33:00.000 Did you get an Adderall injection up your ass or something?

01:33:04.000 Remembering doctors' names?

01:33:06.000 You got cue cards over there?

01:33:07.000 This is because my vitamin D. What?

01:33:10.000 I just took some.

01:33:12.000 That was a vitamin lie.

01:33:14.000 I'm going back to normal.

01:33:16.000 Yeah, 2.7 is the same point.

01:33:19.000 And remember, he said this.

01:33:20.000 He goes, get out in the sun more.

01:33:22.000 And he was resoundingly mocked.

01:33:24.000 Trump does what I do.

01:33:26.000 You talk to incredibly intelligent people who know what they're talking about.

01:33:30.000 You steal that information and then you say it in a dumb way.

01:33:33.000 And people go, you're a moron.

01:33:35.000 And then later you're proven true.

01:33:36.000 And they think you're prescient, some sort of a prophet.

01:33:39.000 But you're really just a kleptomaniac.

01:33:42.000 Like the shampoo thing.

01:33:43.000 The shampoo thing.

01:33:44.000 You're like, yeah, don't do shampoo.

01:33:45.000 It's gay.

01:33:46.000 And then also you get bald.

01:33:48.000 And that's just a vibe you got?

01:33:50.000 Or you knew that?

01:33:50.000 Because that is totally true.

01:33:52.000 I can't remember how I got there.

01:33:53.000 I haven't used shampoo since 1986.

01:33:57.000 Even in the comments, it's like, you know, there's sodium laurith sulfate.

01:34:01.000 I do stumble upon my own discoveries very occasionally.

01:34:04.000 For example, if you don't want to premature ejaculate, you imagine Kevin Spacey's head floating above the bed.

01:34:10.000 Correct.

01:34:10.000 And it buys you four minutes.

01:34:12.000 Exactly.

01:34:12.000 And I cannot tell you how many men have come up to me and said, I thought you were a lunatic.

01:34:18.000 I did the Kevin Spacey thing, and I was a marathon man.

01:34:21.000 You know how many people have buried it deep in doggy style to get a boy?

01:34:25.000 Like, however you say to get a boy.

01:34:27.000 Oh, yeah, that's true, too.

01:34:29.000 I did look that up.

01:34:30.000 There is something about male sperm having to be dropped off at the ovary front door and you can't, they don't do much swimming.

01:34:36.000 Wow.

01:34:36.000 To make a chick, it just jizz on her boot on her way to work.

01:34:41.000 I said, no, she's got female quadruplets.

01:34:45.000 Just beat off thinking about her and she'll get pregnant with a girl.

01:34:50.000 Yeah, to make a boy, it's got to be basically, you've got to see it in her neck.

01:34:56.000 She's got to look like she has an Adam's apple before you realize it's deep enough.

01:35:00.000 Wait, are you a dude or am I making a dude?

01:35:04.000 All right, let's jump to the mailbox.

01:35:06.000 There's probably going to be a lot of mail about Jimmy McInnes, I assume.

01:35:09.000 We'll see if my new co-host is a hit and if we should replace Ryan.

01:35:14.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.

01:35:19.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbox.

01:35:24.000 Let me touch it.

01:35:25.000 Ryan, shut up.

01:35:26.000 You've been replaced by Gavin's dad.

01:35:29.000 By a dad.

01:35:30.000 Yeah, by a dad, period.

01:35:33.000 This picture is making me hard.

01:35:35.000 The thing I'm most obsessed with is her face.

01:35:39.000 665.

01:35:43.000 What does that mean?

01:35:44.000 Oh, 6 to 6.5.

01:35:46.000 Yeah, if you're a tit guy, those are great.

01:35:49.000 See, a lot of times when you have big tits, you're denied an ass.

01:35:54.000 Especially with whites and Asians.

01:35:57.000 But this looks like you got everything.

01:36:00.000 Oh, that's the person who sent it?

01:36:02.000 You're a tit man, right, Dad?

01:36:04.000 And ass.

01:36:06.000 But it was Chris Rock, was it not?

01:36:08.000 He kept on about white men don't have asses.

01:36:13.000 Why is he so concerned with that?

01:36:15.000 Won't happen again.

01:36:18.000 This letter is addressed to Gav and Fag, which I assume is Ryan.

01:36:23.000 Good day, gentlemen.

01:36:24.000 I've lived in the South all my life, excluding a two-year stint in Seattle.

01:36:27.000 I've been fortunate enough to travel extensively.

01:36:29.000 I hated the South until I lived outside of it.

01:36:31.000 I learned my lesson.

01:36:32.000 The answer to your move is Nashville.

01:36:33.000 I've heard that many times.

01:36:35.000 Nashville, not Asheville, right?

01:36:37.000 No, but they, I've also been told Asheville would hate you, but your kids, your daughter would like it, so live near it.

01:36:43.000 And sort of like Madison, it's an island of lunacy surrounded by sane people, although Madisonites describe it the inverse.

01:36:53.000 It has enough hipsters to lose some city flare restaurants and bars.

01:36:56.000 However, the state is deep red, and hipsters don't have the numbers to dictate how people live.

01:37:00.000 I'm from Alabama originally.

01:37:01.000 Oh my God, I was there in the summer once.

01:37:03.000 I almost fucking died.

01:37:05.000 I was in tears.

01:37:07.000 But chose Nashville after I left Seattle.

01:37:09.000 The actual secret is to move to a small rural town outside of Nashville.

01:37:12.000 Yes, I've heard that a lot.

01:37:14.000 Of which there are many great spots to choose from.

01:37:16.000 I live in a town called White House, about 20 miles north of Nashville.

01:37:19.000 Okay, I'll put that in my file called Moving.

01:37:27.000 Sorry, folks.

01:37:28.000 I have to do some paperwork here.

01:37:31.000 It's funny.

01:37:31.000 The great thing about this show and getting all the feedback is patterns emerge.

01:37:35.000 And North Carolina, South Carolina, Eastern Tennessee has emerged as a pattern.

01:37:40.000 There's some gems scattered, but the topographical map.

01:37:46.000 10 things I hate about your shitty show.

01:37:49.000 Oh.

01:37:51.000 Ouch.

01:37:52.000 This is going to sting, folks.

01:37:54.000 Ryan's fucking incompetence, his unrivaled idiocy was amusing for about 10 minutes.

01:38:00.000 It's been a lot more than that.

01:38:02.000 Book of the day, who the fuck reads a book every day?

01:38:05.000 In theory, for someone to keep up with your fucking...

01:38:08.000 Why would you read a book a day?

01:38:09.000 I'm not suggesting that.

01:38:11.000 Right.

01:38:13.000 When you have a cooking show, these morning cooking shows, they say, here's a fun little eggplant dish the next day.

01:38:19.000 Here's some things to do with an English muffin.

01:38:21.000 If one of them tickles your fancy at one point, you make it.

01:38:25.000 The newspaper has a recipe every day.

01:38:27.000 You don't follow that like some sort of food Nazi.

01:38:30.000 No one, nobody is going to read this book.

01:38:35.000 Not one of you.

01:38:37.000 Or if you're interested in books like books about trannies, then you'll be interested in when Harry became Sally.

01:38:44.000 Obviously.

01:38:45.000 Sorry if I gave you too many options to eat.

01:38:49.000 So number two sucks.

01:38:51.000 Call your dad more.

01:38:52.000 He's in the fucking studio.

01:38:57.000 I can listen to that man describe paint drying and be entertained.

01:39:01.000 That's not overstate.

01:39:04.000 He is at least twice as funny as Gavin.

01:39:07.000 And Gavin is a supremely funny guy.

01:39:09.000 I don't know if you've been listening to my quips here.

01:39:11.000 Are you a dude or am I making a dude?

01:39:13.000 Did anyone even get that?

01:39:15.000 That was said off the dome.

01:39:17.000 Has he had any quips remotely close to that?

01:39:20.000 Before we left for the studio, he said he didn't want to stand the whole time.

01:39:24.000 He goes, so can we bring a stool?

01:39:26.000 And I said, I'm not having human feces.

01:39:29.000 You keep your samples between you and your doctor.

01:39:31.000 That's none of my business.

01:39:33.000 No, I'm meant for lunch.

01:39:36.000 He's not that great, guys.

01:39:38.000 Well, some people have to try, like tell jokey jokes like you, and then some people are just naturally witty and funny and charming like he is.

01:39:48.000 Vinyo lyrics.

01:39:50.000 What the fuck is actually being said after but Gavin told?

01:39:54.000 What?

01:39:56.000 The thing, the bumper, before we play the vinyl video.

01:40:02.000 Gavin ran away when he found out Ryan was gay.

01:40:06.000 Gavin told type it's going to be all right.

01:40:08.000 But Gavin's pretty tight.

01:40:10.000 Gavin's all right in the show's pretty tight.

01:40:13.000 Yeah, is this really worthy of a pet peeve list that you miss one of the lyrics in one of the bumpers?

01:40:20.000 Gavin's pronunciation of certain words, particularly Dr. Zeus.

01:40:23.000 I've noticed that with Americans.

01:40:25.000 Maybe they're very parochial and they're not used to foreigners, but even my own children, when I say pasta and Mario Brothers, they get mad.

01:40:35.000 Mario, pasta.

01:40:37.000 And they call NASA NASA.

01:40:40.000 But it's more fanetic to say NASA.

01:40:43.000 Anyway, sorry there's a foreigner here.

01:40:46.000 Constant talk about Prow Boys and Antifa.

01:40:48.000 We get it.

01:40:48.000 Prowboys aren't Nazis and Antifa are blundering idiots.

01:40:50.000 Move on.

01:40:51.000 It's fucking redundant.

01:40:52.000 That's a fair criticism.

01:40:54.000 First 20 minutes of the show is usually a snooze.

01:40:58.000 Noticing a pattern here that the beginning of shows are either really captivating right away or the most boring fucking shit in existence.

01:41:04.000 Okay.

01:41:05.000 Well, I try to keep it light and friendly in the beginning.

01:41:07.000 Howard Stern's show will be nothing but that.

01:41:09.000 He talked for maybe an hour today about his aunt problem.

01:41:14.000 I copy the New York Post.

01:41:16.000 So they'll start with J-Lo like we did today.

01:41:20.000 And then as you settle in and stir your noodle soup, we slowly get into the plea in the Uber sleigh.

01:41:28.000 You can't have your pudding before you have your meat.

01:41:29.000 The New York Post, I think, is 200 years old.

01:41:34.000 How old is the New York Post?

01:41:35.000 Did you turn off the Alexa machine?

01:41:37.000 Yes.

01:41:38.000 Because you're paranoid.

01:41:40.000 I think we're all a little paranoid.

01:41:42.000 Gavin is a clinical retard when it comes to the Bible.

01:41:45.000 For example, you can't believe the Bible and think the earth is millions of years old.

01:41:48.000 Yes, I can.

01:41:49.000 1851, New York Times.

01:41:51.000 Or you want the Post?

01:41:52.000 1851.

01:41:53.000 You want the Post?

01:41:54.000 The Post, yeah.

01:41:54.000 Okay.

01:41:55.000 Why the New York Times?

01:41:56.000 I don't know.

01:41:57.000 I don't know.

01:41:59.000 1851.

01:41:59.000 The New York Post.

01:42:00.000 The New York Times is from 1851.

01:42:02.000 1801.

01:42:04.000 Okay, so half a century older.

01:42:06.000 Yeah.

01:42:07.000 More like almost 7,000 years.

01:42:09.000 Also, you can't believe in the Bible and evolution of humans.

01:42:12.000 Yes, I can.

01:42:13.000 I take the Bibles very metaphorically.

01:42:15.000 I'm not a big Old Testament guy.

01:42:17.000 So I know for a fact the Earth is 4 billion years old.

01:42:21.000 It was created by a large explosion.

01:42:24.000 Boom.

01:42:25.000 The big boom.

01:42:26.000 Well, that's a theory.

01:42:27.000 Let there be light.

01:42:28.000 I believe that God created the big boom.

01:42:32.000 And this is all the dominoes of setting up this perfect.

01:42:35.000 It's sort of like the beginning of that movie Prometheus, where the alien comes to Earth, he eats something, it breaks apart, and those all become the cells.

01:42:43.000 Boom, these expands.

01:42:46.000 Furthermore, I think animals are fucking losers.

01:42:48.000 They're just part of our genetic discharge.

01:42:51.000 Like, if you had some radioactive thing that made a superhero and some got on a plant and became this pathetic little wandering plant, that's what animals are.

01:43:00.000 Sad genetic accidents that wish they could be human and never will be.

01:43:04.000 Well, we're in a genetic accident.

01:43:05.000 No, we're on our way to perfection.

01:43:08.000 Not at all.

01:43:09.000 That's on our way to extinction.

01:43:10.000 That's why our lifespan, well, was going up until this obesity issue.

01:43:14.000 We're on our way to extinction.

01:43:16.000 We'll do a whole episode on deism.

01:43:19.000 No, no, it's anti-deism.

01:43:21.000 I'm a deist.

01:43:23.000 You're an anti-deist.

01:43:24.000 So if we did a discussion, it would be about deism.

01:43:27.000 Yes.

01:43:27.000 Okay.

01:43:30.000 This is the 10 things I hate about you.

01:43:32.000 You always say no when something's right.

01:43:35.000 Like I'll go, there was six of them there.

01:43:36.000 Oh, no.

01:43:37.000 No, I believe there was about half a dozen were actually there.

01:43:41.000 That's what I fucking said.

01:43:45.000 Sometimes Gavin talks so much during the clips that I forget what the actual fucking clip is supposed to be about.

01:43:51.000 We know it's your show, but Jesus Christ, take a fucking water break for a second.

01:43:56.000 And then he makes 10 fucking incompetent, faggy McFag Ryan.

01:44:01.000 So I sandwiched the whole list.

01:44:03.000 He bookended, I believe, is the term.

01:44:05.000 So we're not counting 10.

01:44:07.000 I'll give you two of these.

01:44:09.000 I'll give you too much talk about Prowboys and Antifa, and I'll give you talking during videos.

01:44:19.000 The others were garbage.

01:44:22.000 You can go fuck yourself, and where's your show, asshole?

01:44:25.000 How many subscribers do you have?

01:44:28.000 Ray White, white supremacist.

01:44:30.000 Please share this lost American tradition.

01:44:32.000 I am clicking this with great trepidation.

01:44:35.000 Don't want to lose more banking.

01:44:39.000 Oh, this is Jessica White's father.

01:44:42.000 This is the part of the letters page where they show us memes that we've already done so much on that.

01:44:48.000 I know Jessica White and his father.

01:44:52.000 Weiss did two films on Jessica White.

01:44:55.000 We also introduced Johnny Knoxville to his son.

01:44:58.000 And Jessica White did a documentary called The Wild Whites of West Virginia, something like that.

01:45:07.000 So thank you for intro.

01:45:08.000 Do you also have a clip of Eddie Murphy playing Gumby?

01:45:13.000 Thanks.

01:45:15.000 Please turn me on to a punk band called The Sex Pistols.

01:45:18.000 I'm very curious about them and where they're from.

01:45:20.000 Are there any islands off of Europe that have British people in them?

01:45:26.000 Gavin and Gukliiser came across this weird pandemic scenario that took place at John Hopkins in 2017.

01:45:32.000 The SPARS pandemic, a futuristic scenario for public health risk communicators, just replaced SPARS with COVID and changed the dates from 2025 to 2020.

01:45:42.000 And the PDF reads exactly like COVID.

01:45:45.000 Yeah, I've seen a few of these where it's eerily similar to the pandemic.

01:45:51.000 But what does that mean that we planned it?

01:45:54.000 I think all pandemics are pretty similar, right?

01:45:57.000 You look at Spanish flu pics from 100 years ago and they look like us today.

01:46:03.000 So I'm not blown away by this.

01:46:05.000 China made this vaccine.

01:46:06.000 I don't believe that they intended it to be such a smashing success of sabotage.

01:46:12.000 I think they have calluses on their hands from high-fiving each other.

01:46:16.000 Because holy shit, was this a successful piece of Western vandalism?

01:46:22.000 Way to go.

01:46:23.000 And they're doing great.

01:46:25.000 Exactly.

01:46:27.000 It's a real threat.

01:46:28.000 Germ warfare is.

01:46:31.000 That's the new thing.

01:46:32.000 Yep.

01:46:34.000 It's a hell of a lot cheaper than building aircraft carriers.

01:46:38.000 Right.

01:46:38.000 And they've been doing this for forever, right?

01:46:41.000 They're doing it on their own people with these balloons that dump a kind of anthrax type powder and kill millions of people.

01:46:50.000 The Japanese were big on it.

01:46:53.000 Hey, Gavin, Ryan, go to a real barber and get a $40 haircut.

01:46:56.000 Yes, please.

01:46:57.000 That fucking mop is painful.

01:47:00.000 It's painful.

01:47:01.000 I'm waiting until it gets super long.

01:47:03.000 It looks like you have a hat on and it goes over your eyes.

01:47:06.000 Then what he'll do on his day off, he'll wear a hat that pushes his bangs right into his eyes so he can't see a thing.

01:47:14.000 Yes.

01:47:14.000 And this is on a day that's 70 degrees and he'll have a sweater on too.

01:47:18.000 Yeah, I like that.

01:47:21.000 I like being hot.

01:47:22.000 Anyway, check out this Les Stroud documentary series he made a little while after he ended Survivor Man.

01:47:26.000 Apologies if you've seen this.

01:47:27.000 It's an ancient Chinese secret.

01:47:28.000 I've only watched four episodes.

01:47:30.000 This guy wants us to check out a survival show.

01:47:34.000 This guy's pretty great.

01:47:36.000 You know him?

01:47:37.000 Oh, yeah, he's the Survivor Man.

01:47:39.000 Oh, the hoser.

01:47:40.000 Yeah.

01:47:41.000 Hey, we're down here.

01:47:43.000 We've been here for like two, four hours.

01:47:53.000 Okay, we'll check out that, I guess.

01:47:55.000 I like the episode of this documentary where he goes back to Sunnyville Trailer Park and Julian, you know, hooks him up with a job.

01:48:03.000 Is he from Cash and the Drugs?

01:48:04.000 Is he from Halifax?

01:48:05.000 I don't actually know.

01:48:06.000 Sounds like it.

01:48:07.000 Hey, Gavin, president of the Red Zone.

01:48:09.000 You mentioned on yesterday's show when responding to the last letter, to not bring up one's mom in any conversation.

01:48:13.000 Isn't that hypocritical since you're always bringing up your dad?

01:48:16.000 No.

01:48:16.000 A dad isn't a mom, Jesus.

01:48:20.000 I mean, it's a little lame to always talk about your dad, especially if you're complimenting him all the time.

01:48:24.000 But when you talk about your mom, you sound like a pussy.

01:48:28.000 When you talk about your dad, you sound like you want to be a good dad.

01:48:31.000 It's even worse mentioning that when you have your dad on your show holding your hand.

01:48:36.000 Well, you know.

01:48:40.000 What's the difference?

01:48:41.000 I don't really find Jimmy amusing, but don't mind him on yesterday's show.

01:48:45.000 Yeah, now we're starting to get some more truth here.

01:48:48.000 Oh my God, this guy wrote me a fucking novel about his sister and her second child.

01:48:52.000 Couldn't care less.

01:48:54.000 Music suggestion.

01:48:56.000 We'll do that on our own time.

01:48:58.000 Love your dad.

01:48:58.000 He's the highlight of yesterday's show, but Jesus Christ, get the man a fucking chair.

01:49:02.000 A lot of swearing.

01:49:04.000 Gavin, please check out West Michigan.

01:49:06.000 Lake Michigan is a freshwater ocean with no sharks.

01:49:09.000 It's great skiing, tons of things to do.

01:49:11.000 I have heard West Michigan a few times.

01:49:13.000 So fucking cold.

01:49:14.000 Governor, isn't that where Sweet Home, Alabama, that kid rock song is about?

01:49:23.000 He's in West Michigan in the lakes.

01:49:25.000 Northern Michigan.

01:49:27.000 Yeah, listening to Sweet Home, Alabama.

01:49:29.000 Popular sports with the kids.

01:49:33.000 Get a big farmhouse in the country.

01:49:35.000 Okay, thank you.

01:49:37.000 Holy shit, these letters are long.

01:49:39.000 I think young people do a lot of Adderall.

01:49:42.000 So when they go to write an email, it's just...

01:49:46.000 We should insist on only calligraphy letters from now on.

01:49:50.000 Follow your old man's call and consider Florida for your family's new home.

01:49:53.000 I know that you're a cold fag, and I won't lie to you in saying Florida is not that hot.

01:49:57.000 It's true, summers can be brutal.

01:49:58.000 I almost left myself, but after having a baby, thanks to you, your best decision I ever made.

01:50:02.000 We do get a lot of these letters saying thank you for making me have babies.

01:50:06.000 We decided to stay close to our parents.

01:50:08.000 Yes.

01:50:09.000 After all, several studies appointed to an association between centurions.

01:50:12.000 Yes, yes, yes.

01:50:14.000 You, okay.

01:50:15.000 So that's just very long.

01:50:16.000 And I think it's getting tedious with the family advice here.

01:50:19.000 Dear Jimmy, oh, as someone who has sampled the cultures of the UK, Canada, and the U.S., what is your favorite comedy out of these three countries?

01:50:33.000 I would say get off my lawn.

01:50:38.000 All right.

01:50:39.000 Next.

01:50:41.000 I mean, when you think of Britain, you think of Monty Python and a lot of sarcasm.

01:50:47.000 Yeah, and I like that show that he did about the hotel.

01:50:53.000 Faulty Towers.

01:50:54.000 I thought that was really funny.

01:50:56.000 Black Adder.

01:50:57.000 Black Adder, yes, it's excellent.

01:50:59.000 Yep.

01:51:01.000 But mom says your nose looks like that because Americans don't get sarcasm and you just keep pushing it until someone snaps.

01:51:08.000 Well, my problem is that I got a hold of a line or a joke and I just won't let it go.

01:51:16.000 And so one friend of mine was staying in the same condominium in New Smelling the Beach and he brought a male friend down.

01:51:28.000 And if I said to him at once, I said it to him a thousand times, I really think this is so brave of you, Dave, to come out so late in life.

01:51:39.000 And after about the tenth one, he says, all right, Jim, please just leave it alone.

01:51:44.000 Well, especially if they show it's a weakness of theirs.

01:51:47.000 Yes.

01:51:47.000 So if someone shows me the weak scale on their armor, I just can't stop poking it.

01:51:52.000 It's getting under the skin.

01:51:54.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:51:55.000 But in a way, it's benevolent, because what you're trying to do is toughen up that scale and make it calloused.

01:52:03.000 And then he says here, is it true Americans don't get irony?

01:52:10.000 He also wants you to tell the story of the night you and my mom had strong weed and became two stones.

01:52:17.000 Oh, well, that was funny.

01:52:19.000 Well, that was the time where...

01:52:22.000 So, in fact, I stole the weed off your brother.

01:52:28.000 Okay.

01:52:29.000 And because I forbade him to use weed.

01:52:36.000 So during the late in the evening, I'm having a smoke, really enjoying watching TV.

01:52:45.000 And I realize, wait a minute, where's my wife?

01:52:49.000 So I go out trying to find out.

01:52:51.000 And then she's in the hallway on the phone calling 911 because they've got some people that are out to get her.

01:53:03.000 Tiny goblins, tiny little monsters.

01:53:06.000 They're all out together.

01:53:06.000 And they were trying to get in the window.

01:53:09.000 So I said, what are you doing?

01:53:12.000 She says, I'm calling 911.

01:53:14.000 So I took the phone off her.

01:53:16.000 And I said to the dispatcher on the other end, I said, don't worry, it's not a problem.

01:53:21.000 It's not a problem here.

01:53:23.000 And put the phone in.

01:53:24.000 And they go classic.

01:53:25.000 And I knew that within a few minutes, the police would be around.

01:53:30.000 And so I'm running around the house, opening all the windows to try and get rid of the smoke.

01:53:37.000 And of course, the cops came and said, I'd like to speak to the woman of the house.

01:53:45.000 So I thought, oh my God, I'm in trouble here.

01:53:48.000 So Lorraine eventually came to the front door to talk to them.

01:53:52.000 Now, what I'd said to the cops was that, you know, it's unfortunate.

01:53:57.000 You know, my wife very rarely drinks, but I think she had too much to drink.

01:54:03.000 Threw us marijuana.

01:54:04.000 She became very confused and called the police.

01:54:08.000 So, well, I would like to speak to her anyway.

01:54:10.000 So by that time, Lorraine was beginning to sober up.

01:54:14.000 So they talked to her and saw that, no, it was not a problem.

01:54:18.000 But, you know, I would have been in real trouble if she had fallen the day before.

01:54:25.000 And had a black eye or something.

01:54:28.000 Well, once that allegation is made, it's the big rock in Indiana Jones and it's just rolling.

01:54:33.000 She can't take it back.

01:54:34.000 Well, I know what happened to me one time where Lorraine had fallen because she's a problem with balance from time to time and she had really had a big bruise on her face.

01:54:45.000 So we're shopping at a supermarket and she goes ahead, you know, the shopping has been costed and she goes ahead to pay it.

01:54:55.000 And the shopkeeper assistant looks around at me with absolute, total disgust in her eyes.

01:55:03.000 Oh, you.

01:55:05.000 Yeah, it's not a good look.

01:55:07.000 Is it a coincidence that every time mom gets particularly lippy, she has a bicycle accident?

01:55:14.000 All right, let's do the final video, folks.

01:55:17.000 This is a long up.

01:55:18.000 Long ass up.

01:55:33.000 Yeah.

01:55:34.000 Gavin's all right, and the show is pretty tight.

01:55:37.000 And we're going to hit the show with the final video.

01:55:40.000 Yeah.

01:55:40.000 That's pretty clear to me.

01:55:42.000 Can't believe that made it one out of ten reasons this show sucks.

01:55:45.000 He thought there was a line in there that said, what was it that Gavin told, but Gavin told that wasn't in there.

01:55:51.000 No.

01:55:52.000 Not even kind of.

01:55:53.000 Before we get to the final video, this isn't a video, but I don't understand what I'm looking at and why is a dog my dad?

01:56:00.000 This guy shaved his dogs.

01:56:02.000 He was trying to give him a haircut and it was clippers.

01:56:06.000 And now he's scared in his own home.

01:56:09.000 But this happened to my friend Shug, too.

01:56:12.000 He was using the clippers and with the guard on it, it kept getting caught because it's really expensive to have your dog get a haircut.

01:56:17.000 So he goes, I'll just do it myself.

01:56:18.000 Then he took the clippers off and just went.

01:56:22.000 So now he has this human freak in his house.

01:56:24.000 But look at the other videos.

01:56:26.000 Why are his ears human?

01:56:27.000 Yeah, what the hell?

01:56:28.000 This guy's lying to us.

01:56:30.000 Yeah, what the?

01:56:31.000 That's that skull mask or even Photoshop, right?

01:56:35.000 Yeah, because ears...

01:56:36.000 Those are not dog ears, you jerk.

01:56:40.000 Yeah, put a video.

01:56:42.000 Where's the video?

01:56:43.000 Yeah, where's the video, liar?

01:56:44.000 All right, so that's a waste of everyone's time.

01:56:47.000 Here's a kind of a long video, but so we defunded the police.

01:56:51.000 That's why crime is up.

01:56:52.000 It's not an Asian thing.

01:56:53.000 It's not a Hasidic thing.

01:56:54.000 It's not an old lady thing.

01:56:55.000 It's a criminal and perp thing.

01:56:56.000 And it's your fault, media and rioters, For hamstringing the police.

01:57:03.000 So the police still are forced to do their job, funnily enough.

01:57:07.000 So what do we do?

01:57:08.000 We send an army of them to the, what are they called, an EDP, emotionally disturbed person.

01:57:14.000 And we give them, it takes an army, they have to learn new weapons that they didn't learn in school.

01:57:18.000 And now they've got these fluorescent green pepper bags that they have to chase this perp down who has no intention of stopping at any time.

01:57:29.000 I thought this is the future of policing now that we've ruined the job.

01:57:38.000 40!

01:57:39.000 You ready?

01:57:40.000 You clear for the 40!

01:57:40.000 Clear for the 40!

01:57:42.000 Hit him!

01:57:42.000 40, stand by!

01:57:43.000 40, stand by!

01:57:44.000 Go!

01:57:44.000 Hit him!

01:57:45.000 More!

01:57:45.000 Hit him again!

01:57:47.000 Hit him again!

01:57:48.000 Come on!

01:57:49.000 Let's go!

01:57:50.000 40 ready!

01:57:53.000 40, stand by!

01:57:55.000 This is not police work.

01:57:57.000 You're supposed to chase the bad guy.

01:57:58.000 If he's EDP and he pulls a gun or knife on you, you shoot him dead.

01:58:02.000 That's unfortunate.

01:58:03.000 Then you tackle him if he doesn't kill you and you put the handcuffs on.

01:58:08.000 Uh-oh.

01:58:09.000 Take cover.

01:58:12.000 No one's taking cover.

01:58:26.000 Does anyone have more rounds?

01:58:27.000 Is it completely not lethal?

01:58:29.000 Go switch.

01:58:30.000 Go get his.

01:58:32.000 Go get his.

01:58:33.000 Only the one the other one.

01:58:35.000 Am I talking too much for this video?

01:58:44.000 Romney.

01:58:45.000 Over here.

01:58:49.000 Give him orders.

01:58:50.000 Give him orders.

01:58:51.000 Come on.

01:58:53.000 There's no mental institutions.

01:58:55.000 There's mentally ill people everywhere.

01:58:57.000 And we're not allowed to handle it.

01:58:59.000 So now the streets are full of lunatics and you can't police them or arrest them.

01:59:22.000 Westbound, East West Alley.

01:59:24.000 You're on hot cops.

01:59:27.000 You're on long cops.

01:59:30.000 Where we just take long walks with cops chasing a hallelujah.

01:59:34.000 You want any more of your time wasted?

01:59:37.000 Lay down.

01:59:38.000 Okay, 40.

01:59:38.000 Hey, hey, hey, don't shoot it.

01:59:40.000 Give it to Romney.

01:59:42.000 Give it to somebody else.

01:59:43.000 Give it to somebody who already shot already.

01:59:44.000 Robny.

01:59:45.000 So they're using him to train with these stupid guns.

01:59:48.000 Take over the 40.

01:59:51.000 Hey, give it a Romney.

01:59:53.000 Come on.

01:59:56.000 Robny.

01:59:59.000 Take him with a 40.

02:00:00.000 Get him a little bit closer.

02:00:01.000 It's a paintball gun.

02:00:03.000 Here, you grab the 40.

02:00:04.000 Aim.

02:00:05.000 Aim good.

02:00:06.000 Get closer.

02:00:07.000 Aim on the leg.

02:00:08.000 This is almost more cruel than weird hunting.

02:00:12.000 Yeah.

02:00:12.000 This is maudlin.

02:00:14.000 We're on a crazy safari with colorful green weapons.

02:00:22.000 Come on, you gotta aim better, man.

02:00:24.000 Right there.

02:00:25.000 Aim better.

02:00:35.000 I'm not talking.

02:00:36.000 Hope you're happy.

02:00:39.000 Has he got something?

02:00:43.000 Bring another taser.

02:00:44.000 Bring another taser.

02:00:46.000 Oh man, they gotta bring a wheelbarrow of various tricks.

02:00:52.000 I did see a cool rope thing they shoot that goes.

02:00:54.000 Just like it wraps around.

02:00:56.000 Get in cover.

02:00:58.000 Shoot him.

02:01:07.000 Stop, stop, stop.

02:01:10.000 Okay, stop, stop.

02:01:11.000 There must be 15 cops there.

02:01:14.000 Only you cover him.

02:01:15.000 When are you covering him?

02:01:16.000 Give me the rest of here.

02:01:19.000 This is a fucking mess.

02:01:22.000 It's just a mess.

02:01:22.000 I think he was shot.

02:01:23.000 Yeah, he was.

02:01:25.000 I think one of the guys just showed up and went, yeah, I'm not, I don't need a green thing.

02:01:28.000 That's a stream of his blood there.

02:01:29.000 Well, no, he was rushing them.

02:01:32.000 Let me see if you could take this off.

02:01:34.000 You could see there's a stream of blood tripping towards under the car.

02:01:38.000 The pepper and the taser didn't work out.

02:01:42.000 Wait, this is still going?

02:01:44.000 In that way done.

02:01:44.000 And now it's like torture plus murder.

02:01:47.000 At least if you just shot him, you would have gotten the same thing done.

02:01:51.000 But I didn't see if he had a weapon.

02:01:53.000 I think he had something in his strike trial with all of these officers sitting in court all day trying to defend them with their pepper spray.

02:02:01.000 In his right hand, I believe he did have something.

02:02:03.000 Looks a waste.

02:02:04.000 See that?

02:02:04.000 Like a hammer.

02:02:05.000 Cops quit.

02:02:07.000 Hammer or a metal thing in his right hand.

02:02:11.000 All right, that's not a very cheery ending.

02:02:12.000 Jump ahead, though.

02:02:13.000 Let's see what happens.

02:02:18.000 The reason I wanted to end with this is because I wanted to show this is where we're at now.

02:02:22.000 You thought that you could...

02:02:24.000 Oh, it's a different angle.

02:02:26.000 Oh, he's got an axe.

02:02:30.000 And people go, we need better mental care.

02:02:32.000 Sorry, whether you're crazy, malicious, kind, an albino, if you're running at cops with an axe, you have to die.

02:02:41.000 There's no other solution.

02:02:45.000 Oh, he whipped the fucking axe.

02:02:53.000 Looked like he had more than one.

02:02:57.000 Anyway, folks, you can't get rid of authority.

02:03:00.000 You can't get rid of law and order.

02:03:01.000 It's the beginning of the end.

02:03:02.000 You can't get rid of hate.

02:03:03.000 Did you have something to say?

02:03:04.000 Well, yes.

02:03:05.000 A friend of mine, he ended up as a jailer in a prison for the criminally insane.

02:03:14.000 No, they weren't that insane because they realized now that they've been judged to be insane, they could do anything, and there was no further punishment.

02:03:25.000 Right.

02:03:26.000 And then, what they insisted was, since they were insane, they should be treated in a hospital.

02:03:34.000 So now the guards became hospital attendants.

02:03:38.000 Or they call them interns or whatever?

02:03:39.000 Oh, God, it was ridiculous.

02:03:42.000 And they're probably less armed.

02:03:43.000 Now they're walking around in white shirts with batons instead of guns.

02:03:47.000 Well, and they know that you can't punish the mentally insane people.

02:03:55.000 No.

02:03:57.000 No, because it's not their fault.

02:03:59.000 And there must have been some of them who were just there saying, yeah, I'm insane.

02:04:03.000 Like Lorena Bobbitt, who chopped off a man's dick, threw it in a field, and got 30 days in a loony bin.

02:04:12.000 Because she's part of the privileged class.

02:04:15.000 What's happening with him now, Ryan?

02:04:20.000 All right, folks, that's the show.

02:04:22.000 I'm not sure we should have Jim back.

02:04:24.000 I don't know.

02:04:24.000 We'll see what the fans say.

02:04:25.000 I think we're all running out of patience.

02:04:27.000 We're like the English.

02:04:28.000 We've run out of patience for Scotland.

02:04:31.000 Separate.

02:04:32.000 Go ahead and separate.

02:04:33.000 So instead of your dad leaving you, you're leaving your dad.

02:04:36.000 Yes, yes.

02:04:38.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - April 06, 2021

S03E95 - REFUND THE COPS

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