It's the first Friday of the new year, and the boys are back with a brand new Friday night show. They talk about their favorite Friday nights of all-time, and what it means to be a Friday night comedian. They also talk about the recent death of comedian Jim Carrey, and why they think it's a good idea to dress up as a fictional character.
Transcript
Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. You can also explore and interact with the transcripts here.
00:01:39.000Keep it quiet, silence on my cries for help.
00:01:41.000As long as I am rising till I'm upside down, I won't look down.
00:01:46.000This a meteoric rise keeps ignoring all the horror stories like so-and-so got way too famous and ended up killing himself with some pills and a knife.
00:01:52.000Hey, I am not the one who's gonna self-destruct.
00:01:55.000Got it up way too far to fail or screw it up.
00:05:10.000He has almost single-handedly destroyed the American justice system.
00:05:15.000I was just talking to John Kinsman's wife, Sanoa, and I told her about that judge in White Plains that threw out the case of the gangbanger shooting someone because the jury was all white.
00:05:26.000So that means they're racist, and that means he didn't get a fair trial.
00:05:29.000And I go, okay, these are the new rules.
00:08:51.000Because the Manhattan DA is Cyrus Vance and he's behind all of this shit.
00:08:56.000So I wouldn't be surprised if Soros, when I say Soros appointed, what I mean is he pours money into the campaign and then they end up winning.
00:09:04.000And then you have a woke justice system, which it doesn't sound that terrible when you first hear about it.
00:09:10.000You're like, oh, well, so a murderer will have to go to jail and the jury is still going to find him guilty if he murdered the person.
00:09:41.000Equally disconcerting, these Trojan horse prosecutors drop any pretense of impartiality.
00:09:46.000They bring a highly charged political viewpoint to an office that's supposed to be apolitical.
00:09:50.000It's no wonder Soros-funded prosecutors like New York Attorney General Letitia James and Manhattan District Attorney Cyrus Vance Jr. have harassed President Trump with never-ending investigations and subpoenas.
00:10:04.000A.G. James is also trying to disband the NRA.
00:10:07.000Like Captain Ahab chasing after the whale, the white whale, they are obsessed with undermining the president and ultimately our nation.
00:16:57.000Purposely, you're just doing it on purpose.
00:16:59.000But not only do they do it on purpose, but they purposefully sat there planting DAs all over the country so they could control justice and Soros could decide who goes to jail and for how long.
00:17:24.000You bankrupt people, you ruin their lives, you stress them out, you give them cancer.
00:17:28.000And that's what they did to Roger Stone.
00:17:30.000But with Roger Stone, they decided to up it one more and go, no, let's actually throw him in prison.
00:17:37.000And the only reason he got out is because the president of the United States, the most powerful man in the world, said, don't put him in prison.
00:17:43.000They're still fucking with him like crazy.
00:20:21.000Well, they'll have to watch the NYT supercut because if they watch the 10 or so relevant minutes of the Jaden X footage, they probably wouldn't reach the same conclusions McCaskill wants them to.
00:20:33.000So just to be clear here, the only way she can get her narrative is to watch a carefully edited supercut by a liberal newspaper.
00:21:18.000He's like, yeah, we were just cleaning things up, actually.
00:21:20.000Yeah, we're just trying to make sure no one damages anything.
00:21:23.000And then, you know, I think Stop Hate, they put together a whole thing of people stopping literally Antifa members, like guys dressed in all black.
00:22:58.000We were playing blackjack with the meanest blackjack dealer you've ever, the grumpiest, shittiest, most sullen blackjack dealer I've ever dealt with.
00:23:05.000And I was like, hey, can I ask you a question?
00:23:08.000How did you get the nickname, Mr. Grumpy?
00:24:12.000In a letter to the judge asking for leniency, Lloyd wrote that she was a registered Democrat, but that she and her husband began supporting Trump in 2016 because he was standing up for what we believe in.
00:24:19.000After her arrest, Lloyd's lawyer gave her a list of books and movies to, quote, help her see what life is like for others in our country.
00:24:32.000Lloyd said she has sought to educate herself by watching movies such as Schindler's List and the history channel's Burning Tulsa and reading Brian Stevenson's Just Mercy.
00:24:42.000I've lived a sheltered life and truly haven't experienced life the way many have, Lloyd wrote.
00:24:47.000I've learned that even though we live in a wonderful country, things still need to improve.
00:24:51.000People of all colors should feel as safe as I do to walk down the street.
00:25:08.000In the Soviet Union, if you committed wrong think, you would go to a re-education camp.
00:25:13.000Sometimes, not only would you go to re-education camp, but you'd also have to do hard labor for like three or four months, and then you'd come back and be reintegrated into society, having meted out your punishment, which is exactly like that Marine who called in, or maybe he wasn't a Marine, sergeant,
00:25:29.000whatever, that military dude, who said, I don't think women belong in the military.
00:25:34.000He was stripped of his rank and forced to do, what was it, 60 days hard labor, and then he could quit, or he was going to go to prison.
00:27:04.000And the other thing that's great about being a globalist who controls the justice system is you change the priorities of the FBI and the CIA.
00:27:15.000Because if they arrest Antifa for destroying our country, they don't go to jail.
00:28:41.000And I was like, this is so much better.
00:28:43.000If you're going to spend 88 grand, it should be something that gives you a boner where you wake up in the middle of the night and you just have to go and just look at it.
00:30:38.000But nice work, FBI, CIA, you caught them.
00:30:43.000You're really rounding up those meanderers.
00:30:46.000One day they'll get all the old grandmas to watch movies and read books and be punished with probation for the sin of the January 6th meandering.
00:31:48.000And, you know, as like you guys, when you guys hear of something, you guys show up as you do now and ask questions or record and see what happens.
00:40:32.000They say that 14% is part of the, is 50% of the violent crimes, but it's more like 2% because it's black males 18 to 25, and it's more like 70% of crime in general.
00:42:57.000Smokeshow, by the way, is the one who was so impressed with our man David Shortel for just on instincts alone staking out Roger Stone's house minutes before the SWAT team showed up.
00:43:15.000But the problem with rooting for Ed Henry is I can never forget him crying his face off on Fox and Friends when he decided he was going to give his sister a kidney or something.
00:47:29.000So for our viewers, you've had a heavy heart for a while, rightfully so.
00:47:34.000Your sister, Colleen, has a liver disorder, and you, as her brother, have decided to step up and donate a portion of your liver.
00:47:42.000This has been a long journey, and it's really, it's good to talk about it.
00:47:45.000It's just hard to hope it helps people because there's a lot of people who need organ donations.
00:47:50.000The people probably going through exactly what you're going through right now, and you sharing the story is going to make a huge difference.
00:47:55.000I'm going to give you a huge kudos for this ad, honestly.
00:48:44.000And I'd like to cut over to Ryan now because he would like to make a formal apology for making Ed Henry fart while he was discussing his life of his possible death of his sister.
00:48:57.000Guys, you know, we all go through things.
00:49:58.000Good news in the history of sports here.
00:50:00.000Remember that thing from like an hour ago, the YouTubers fighting the TikTokers and the Zulus fighting the Hulus and the Hootsies killing the Tootsies?
00:50:12.000No, the worst was the Triller one where we paid money to watch Justin Bieber, that chick who had a number one hit, who did my baby Milky Duds.
00:50:28.000She had the big controversy, whatever her name was.
00:51:12.000And then I was so pissed off the next day.
00:51:14.000I went in the gym and I was like, this can't go on.
00:51:16.000There's no way anyone is watching the next one.
00:51:20.000Now, I think a few people tuned in to the Jake Paul, what was it, Floyd Mayweather one, which was clearly fake.
00:51:29.000We saw Floyd knock him out accidentally and then carry him so he wouldn't hit the mat because they had previously agreed on eight rounds and that's what all the betting was based on.
00:51:57.000Turns out, no one on the card has been paid yet.
00:52:00.000And the company that put it on has filed for bankruptcy.
00:52:02.000Right, Bryce Hall, who claimed he was going to make $5 million, got punched in the face so hard he turned into one of the founding fathers for nothing.
00:52:07.000On top of that, the company that put on the fight, if you watch Real Fighting, you would get a kick out of this, thought that they could get 500,000 pay-per-views.
00:52:14.000That's what they needed just to break even, pay everyone's salaries.
00:56:15.000There was a textile shortage because of the war, so it was a way to show off because textiles were rare, so you must be really macking if you have an extra long jacket.
00:59:39.000Yes, the building in Miami collapsed because of global warming.
00:59:42.000Maybe if it was like near the edge of the sea and it collapsed into the sea, we might be able to, you might have a point there if you could prove that the sea levels were rising and affecting the foundation.
00:59:52.000It was nowhere near the sea, you fucking retard.
01:00:42.000I want to talk about happy things, man.
01:00:45.000Like, poor Kyle Dunnegan, he's not going to be able to do a hilarious imitation anymore because Biden is better than the cartoon depiction he does.
01:01:25.000You know those people who are kind enough not to put their parents in old age homes and they're just around and they become sort of your home becomes a sitcom.
01:01:33.000And they say things like, I want to talk about happy things, man.
01:01:36.000You're like, all right, Grandpa Joe, we'll talk about happy things, buddy.
01:04:27.000While the American justice system and intelligence is focused on the post office guys because they went to Washington on January 6th, no one's really paying attention to the fact that we are headed to a war with China.
01:04:41.000China has said, China's basically announced they're going to be taking Taiwan.
01:04:48.000We are facing this mountain of inflation.
01:04:51.000The entire world hates China for the plague.
01:04:54.000And they've made it very clear that if anyone fucks with them, they're dead.
01:05:42.000When the United States is bitterly divided, there talks about these kind of unbridgeable chasm of values, not just of political parties in the United States.
01:06:02.000The Chinese have launched a massive new campaign to create solidarity among the Chinese, to make them truly one nation.
01:06:14.000Now, they're not after true solidarity.
01:06:17.000They're not trying to include everyone.
01:06:19.000In fact, every now and then the Chinese will launch an extermination campaign against the Muslims over here or the Falun Gong over there.
01:06:27.000They want, nevertheless, to create a unified China.
01:06:31.000And according to one source, a kind of a credible source, they're succeeding.
01:06:37.000The source is a guy named Zhou Tsai, T-S-A-I.
01:06:40.000He is one of the founders of the Chinese e-commerce giant called Alibaba, a very successful company that has helped to make Zhou Tsai into a billionaire from Jack Ma.
01:07:08.000And he said, not only that, but because they're happy, they support the government that is making them happy.
01:07:15.000And when he was asked about what is the basis for this happiness, he said the following.
01:07:22.000He says, the China that I see, the large numbers of the population, I'm talking about 80 to 90 percent, are very, very happy with the fact that their lives are improving every year.
01:07:32.000He goes on to say, when I started Alibaba in 1999, the gross domestic product, the per capita GDP, was $800.
01:14:35.000I guarantee you, if you asked someone about their pronouns, and it wasn't the 0.001% of lunatics out there, it would take you like three minutes of explaining before they even understood the question.
01:14:57.000He said, pronouns are often attributed to a person at birth, blah, blah, blah.
01:15:03.000When newborns can be labeled, oh, God, despite a wealth of progress on the matter, many people still have a habit of assuming a person's gender and pronouns.
01:20:17.000Animations, queer women, trans, and non-binary creatives are pushing gender minority boundaries in kids' cartoons.
01:20:24.000Their counterparts couldn't or wouldn't dare.
01:20:27.000While queer women and non-binary creatives are asking themselves tough questions when it comes to gender representation in kids' cartoons, they're often the ones pushing for diversity on screen at a very high personal cost.
01:22:27.000I don't think there are any other Ho-Chunk Slovaks in the universe.
01:22:30.000There was some racist KKK group that said blacks go to black heaven and whites go to white heaven.
01:22:35.000And I used to always joke around with her and her brother that they're going to be the only two people on the Ho-Chunk Slovak heaven cloud planet.
01:22:45.000So, like Ben Carson, I've said this before, he doesn't see a black brain surgeon and go, finally I can do it.
01:23:40.000You either say no trans people at our spa and they burn it down, or you have some dude with a wig and his dick out in front of kids and they burn it down.
01:23:49.000So you're either a transphobe or a pedophile.
01:28:14.000A statement from a sister band, Lower Kootenai, was posted online Wednesday saying some of the findings had the human remains buried in shallow graves only three to four feet deep and that it's believed the remains of the 182 souls are from the member bands of the two.
01:28:29.000Once again, we're not getting the whole story.
01:28:33.000Did you know, by the way, I don't know if this is all in it, I know with my wife's tribe, if you have to be buried with your whole body.
01:28:41.000So a lot of them get diabetes, which means they lose their fingers and toes towards the end.
01:28:45.000So they keep the fingers and toes like in a jar in the garage in a bowling bag.
01:28:49.000So when it's time to bury me, put all the shit back.
01:28:52.000I guess you get all your fingers back in the afterlife.
01:35:04.000I believe the coconut dog is a Dutch shepherd, and yes, they have the sprinkles.
01:35:09.000They make people fall in love with them.
01:35:11.000Loyal companion, babysitter, comic relief survivalist, and a warrior, all in one dog.
01:35:16.000My theory, they exist today because they are often born with the comic gene, which made them literally the last to be eaten as the only reason to laugh in the toughest of times.
01:35:26.000That and the fact that they do seem able to subsist on human presence alone.
01:35:30.000I'm not biased, not a beater and owner, but I've met a few and they've all had the twinkle in their eye and the ability to be funny, just existing.
01:36:55.000Gav, I think you might get something out of this interview with Mark Lamont Hill and Judge Joe Brown.
01:36:59.000Brown has some old school opinions, and while I think the correct response to sexual assault is tar and feathers, that doesn't mean that both sides don't have responsibility somewhere along in the story.
01:37:09.000Immediately after an event during crisis time, it's time to hold the assaulter responsible.
01:37:15.000Sorry, immediately after, you guys got to try to incorporate commas into some of your shit.
01:37:20.000Immediately after an event, during crisis time, comma, is time to hold the assaulter responsible.
01:37:27.000But there are sober moments where we have to hold people We care about responsible for their actions when it makes sense.
01:37:34.000Also, people always get this wrong: Spanish flies to make people horny.
01:37:49.000Again, assuming Bill Cosby doesn't take the legal stuff off the table, if we look at the depositions, the very thing that got him ultimately, the thing that ultimately got him locked up, and those depositions, and he's talking about the various women he had sex with,
01:38:05.000with giving them alcohol and pills, whether it's Quailudes or Benadryl.
01:38:09.000If you look at the dozens of women who come forward and accuse him, is there room to say, look, Bill Cosby can come home because the prosecutor was wrong, but Bill Cosby also has to be accountable for what he represents and for character-like behavior.
01:38:26.000What about these women being accountable for their own behavior?
01:45:58.000Okay, the reason this stuck out with me is the sadism from the woman filming is just like, I want pedophiles to die.
01:46:08.000I could probably joke around as a pedophile died, but maybe not.
01:46:12.000Anyone else, like someone, even a murderer, someone murdered someone and then you're watching them die, that's still going to be like harsh.