Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - August 31, 2021


S04E23 - WHO GETS THE KIDS?


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 38 minutes

Words per Minute

150.03537

Word Count

14,846

Sentence Count

1,588

Misogynist Sentences

102

Hate Speech Sentences

103


Summary

On this week's episode, the boys discuss the UFC 246, Tyron Woodley's loss to Jake Paul, and the aftermath of the Ferguson riots. Plus, the usual nonsense. Also, a new addition to the show, a special guest star of the show.


Transcript

00:00:16.000 Even when you're fucking about you, I think I'm going home and turning up my phone.
00:00:23.000 I wanna be alone, I wanna be alone.
00:00:27.000 Life is moving on, even when you don't give a fuck about you.
00:00:31.000 Don't wanna hear your song.
00:00:33.000 I think I'm going home and turning up my phone.
00:00:36.000 I wanna be alone, I wanna be alone.
00:00:42.000 Funeral attendance growing as I go.
00:00:47.000 That's another one of the buffet boys.
00:00:50.000 My new favorite guys.
00:00:54.000 And that was Puya with Leave Me Alone.
00:00:57.000 I sent it to my daughter and said, this is cool.
00:01:00.000 And she said, cringe.
00:01:03.000 Then she said, worse than Bo Burnham.
00:01:07.000 And I thought, my daughter's mean.
00:01:11.000 She's a cool snob.
00:01:14.000 Actually, they're all mean.
00:01:15.000 Remember I told you we went to that Williamsburg, colonial Williamsburg, the old-timey place, and we went to see a trial, and it was a guy who was working with patriots.
00:01:29.000 This is pre-American Revolution, and they're all dressed old-timey with the white wigs.
00:01:34.000 And I stood up and I said the animal house speech, and I said, we're going to win this war, and I'm not going to sit here and let you badmouth the United States of America.
00:01:43.000 And then a magistrate grabbed me, and I was thrown out of the courtroom.
00:01:48.000 And I thought it was pretty funny, and people were laughing and cheering and stuff.
00:01:51.000 And my youngest boy, he was probably six at the time.
00:01:55.000 He's eating funnies.
00:01:56.000 And I go, so what do you think of that last night?
00:01:58.000 That was pretty funny, right?
00:01:59.000 What do you think, your old man?
00:02:00.000 And he goes, cringe.
00:02:06.000 Mean.
00:02:08.000 Many people thought our show last night was cringe.
00:02:12.000 Tim from Tactical Walls, who I adore, was not popular with the viewers.
00:02:18.000 He is quite a chatty Kathy.
00:02:21.000 But here's the thing about Censored.tv.
00:02:24.000 It's never boring.
00:02:25.000 It's not predictable.
00:02:26.000 So we've had a lot of mixing it up.
00:02:29.000 Oh, it's an Afghan war vet.
00:02:31.000 Oh, it's a four-hour fight with the dudes and a sponsor.
00:02:35.000 Oh, it's back to a normal show.
00:02:36.000 I haven't had a normal news show since Tuesday.
00:02:40.000 So we've got a lot to catch up on.
00:02:41.000 I don't think we're going to get close to any of it.
00:02:45.000 What?
00:02:46.000 One thing I wanted to show yesterday, though, was Tyron Woodley may have lost the fight, but has everyone seen these clips of him arguing with Jake Paul?
00:02:56.000 That's so fucking good.
00:02:57.000 It was way better than that shitty fight that I don't even remember, to be honest.
00:03:02.000 How many people in your neighborhood dress like that, Tim?
00:03:05.000 How many people were busted down?
00:03:08.000 Answer my question.
00:03:09.000 Since you're so good.
00:03:10.000 I'm from Ferguson.
00:03:11.000 I answer.
00:03:11.000 How many people in your neighborhood dress like you?
00:03:13.000 How many rap videos have you watched?
00:03:17.000 Exactly.
00:03:20.000 Have you seen that before?
00:03:21.000 No.
00:03:22.000 Yeah.
00:03:22.000 That's the best reaction I've ever seen to someone getting dissed.
00:03:27.000 And then he eloquently puts a little cherry on the Sunday with exactly.
00:03:33.000 How many people in your neighborhood bust out Cuban links?
00:03:35.000 The answer is zero.
00:03:37.000 Zero people in his neighborhood wear Cuban links.
00:03:40.000 How many rap videos has he watched?
00:03:42.000 Millions.
00:03:43.000 Millions.
00:03:44.000 And that's right.
00:03:45.000 It's all about Ferguson.
00:03:46.000 The thing I didn't get about this little fight is, did you not look up your opponent first?
00:03:52.000 You're making fun of him and saying he's not real, he's not from the streets when he's from Ferguson.
00:03:57.000 Ever heard of the Ferguson effect?
00:03:59.000 Remember the riots?
00:04:00.000 It's a really, really shitty place to be.
00:04:04.000 Look it up before you diss him.
00:04:07.000 And then check out this other video where he's talking about how much money these people get when they fight Jake Paul.
00:04:14.000 Do you want to respond to that?
00:04:16.000 Yeah, I mean, ask any fighter on the card.
00:04:18.000 This is all their biggest payday of their careers by far.
00:04:21.000 Ask Amanda Serrano.
00:04:23.000 Ask Charles Conwell.
00:04:24.000 Ask Tyron Woodley.
00:04:26.000 Ask these nuts.
00:04:27.000 Four time.
00:04:30.000 Ask these nuts.
00:04:32.000 Is that a drop?
00:04:33.000 That should be a drop.
00:04:34.000 But we're never going to say ask.
00:04:37.000 Be like, so how many people fucking blah blah blah?
00:04:40.000 Ask these nuts.
00:04:41.000 When everybody says it, when you leave it off with like how many this, how many that?
00:04:44.000 Or any question, really.
00:04:46.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, you're right.
00:04:47.000 You're right.
00:04:48.000 Like, if I say something like, I don't even understand what they're doing.
00:04:51.000 Ask these nuts.
00:04:52.000 Yeah.
00:04:53.000 That's perfect.
00:04:53.000 Yeah, that's perfect.
00:04:56.000 Also in the silly news, I watched Vacation Friends last night.
00:05:01.000 It's a totally realistic movie that makes perfect sense.
00:05:06.000 And it addresses something that happens to all of us, really.
00:05:10.000 You know, when black aristocrats go on vacation and they are confronted with loudmouthed, tacky, redneck white people?
00:05:19.000 And they go, oh.
00:05:21.000 And they're so embarrassed by the terrible behavior of these white people?
00:05:28.000 You know, the black guy will own a construction company and the dad will be disappointed in him because that's not good enough.
00:05:35.000 The dad, of course, is the dean of a prominent business college.
00:05:39.000 And the white people, well, they're kind of unemployed, losers, freaks who were always getting wasted and doing Coke and yelling at the airport.
00:05:48.000 How many times have you seen these white people embarrass themselves at the airport and just party way too hard?
00:05:56.000 But eventually, that's cocaine by the way.
00:05:58.000 Eventually, the square, poor, aristocratic blacks learn to let their hair down and have a little bit of fun.
00:06:08.000 What?
00:06:09.000 Like, there's even a scene where they go fox hunting and the white guy doesn't know how to do it.
00:06:15.000 He shows up on a golf cart with a gun and they're wearing like the little British hats.
00:06:25.000 Is this all the trailer?
00:06:26.000 It's going on forever.
00:06:27.000 This is the whole movie.
00:06:28.000 We do too.
00:06:29.000 Jesus.
00:06:30.000 Good evening, everyone.
00:06:31.000 Is he doing nothing?
00:06:32.000 Marcus and I crossed paths in Mexico.
00:06:34.000 Get to know each other intimately.
00:06:36.000 This is the best wedding I've ever been to.
00:06:39.000 Put that bottle on your head.
00:06:40.000 Babe, he's not serious.
00:06:42.000 We've been drinking.
00:06:43.000 You know how white people are reckless with their guns, always carrying guns all over the place and scaring black people?
00:06:50.000 What?
00:06:53.000 Anyway, it's brutal.
00:06:56.000 Brutal.
00:06:57.000 With the stupidest...
00:06:58.000 There they are.
00:06:59.000 You see them fox hunting?
00:07:01.000 Look at that.
00:07:02.000 I took pictures of this and sent it to Kumia going, don't you hate when this happens?
00:07:07.000 You're fox hunting and then some redneck brings you drugs and gets you high?
00:07:11.000 Whoa, what shitty drug effects.
00:07:13.000 Yeah, it's super cool.
00:07:15.000 Well, they're playing What You Want by the Beastie Boy, so I think they're duplicating what you want.
00:07:20.000 And now you have a story that's similar.
00:07:23.000 Oh, God, yeah, Candyman.
00:07:25.000 Well, pull up that trailer while you tell us all about your experience, which judging from what you told me yesterday is the same experience.
00:07:33.000 White people suck.
00:07:34.000 Black people are awesome.
00:07:35.000 In every scene, this is Jordan Peele.
00:07:38.000 He produced it.
00:07:40.000 So in every scene, they're just doing something, watching this to be like, it's not like white people do it, but just white people in every conversation.
00:07:48.000 Jordan Peele is not black.
00:07:51.000 What is black about Jordan Peele?
00:07:53.000 The only thing he can say is, well, you don't know.
00:07:55.000 You haven't lived my experience.
00:07:56.000 I live in a racist country where people are shitting on me all the time and saying I can't do this, can't do that, because I'm black.
00:08:01.000 So that's why I'm black.
00:08:03.000 Okay.
00:08:03.000 If that were so, that would be true.
00:08:06.000 What's that part again?
00:08:08.000 What part?
00:08:09.000 So if you say candyman, you get killed?
00:08:11.000 Yes.
00:08:11.000 Who kills you?
00:08:13.000 Like a Freddy ghost kind of guy?
00:08:15.000 The candyman.
00:08:16.000 It's a black guy with a trench coat.
00:08:18.000 How does he know they said candyman?
00:08:20.000 Well, he's supernatural.
00:08:21.000 Like, he's got bees coming out of his mouth and shit.
00:08:23.000 And this all comes back down to like this innocent guy who gave candy to kids was shot by the police in the beginning.
00:08:37.000 He's just an innocent man who comes out of the wall and gives a kid candy.
00:08:41.000 And then the police are like, get him.
00:08:43.000 And then they shoot him and kill him.
00:08:44.000 As they do.
00:08:45.000 Well, that was Michael Brown was handing out candy.
00:08:48.000 Right.
00:08:48.000 Trayvon Martin was handing out candy.
00:08:50.000 Candy up, don't shoot.
00:08:53.000 Can you turn that speaker down?
00:08:54.000 It's going to get us kicked out of this space.
00:08:56.000 It's so fucking loud.
00:08:59.000 Jordan Peele was abandoned by his black father as a baby.
00:09:04.000 And just like Obama, his mom was a black fetishist who saw this cool black academic.
00:09:12.000 I think he may have been from Africa.
00:09:14.000 Boned him.
00:09:15.000 Then he takes off.
00:09:16.000 And she raises him in the Upper West Side, which is all white, mostly Jewish.
00:09:22.000 And he goes to all these fancy, stupid art schools like they have.
00:09:25.000 The Beastie Boys went to them.
00:09:27.000 Here in New York, there are ridiculous schools you can go to.
00:09:30.000 And the school he went to, they have a garden on the roof and all that.
00:09:33.000 So tell me what's black about him.
00:09:35.000 Well, people shout on him because he's black.
00:09:37.000 No, they did not.
00:09:39.000 He got so much pussy in school.
00:09:41.000 I promise you.
00:09:42.000 The guy was getting bored of blowjobs.
00:09:45.000 In the movie, there's this black nerd who has a, she hangs up her backpack when she gets into the school.
00:09:49.000 They just showed it.
00:09:50.000 Oh, they did?
00:09:51.000 Yeah.
00:09:51.000 Yeah, so she's got bad brains and a Black Lives Matter fist patch on her.
00:09:57.000 And then as the girls are about to leave in this scene where they're saying Candyman, all white girls, right?
00:10:02.000 And then the one Asian girl is like, fuck this, I'm out of here because she's smart.
00:10:06.000 But the white girls, and right before this scene, the way they threw to it, they were like, who's stupid enough to say Candyman in front of a mirror?
00:10:12.000 And they just go to white girls.
00:10:13.000 I'm like, yeah, fuck these bitches.
00:10:14.000 So they turned it.
00:10:15.000 And by the way, when they make these girls stupid, you want them to die.
00:10:19.000 Yeah.
00:10:20.000 Well, here's another reason.
00:10:22.000 Here's another reason they deserve to die because they bang on the door that the black girl's on.
00:10:26.000 You know those black nerds that are always getting bullied by white girls?
00:10:29.000 So when that happened, they're like, fuck you, bitch.
00:10:32.000 Stop reading books, you black nerd.
00:10:34.000 Yeah, stop pissing.
00:10:36.000 And so then they all get brutally slaughtered, and it's like, yeah.
00:10:42.000 You can die.
00:10:42.000 It's the way that you feel when the Joker starts killing people.
00:10:45.000 Like, you know what?
00:10:46.000 He's had enough shit.
00:10:48.000 Yeah, you know, what's really going on there is white murder fantasies.
00:10:53.000 And I don't think black people, well, they're probably enjoying it, but you know, if you want to make money in the movie industry, you want to entertain white people.
00:11:00.000 They're probably with non-white Hispanics, like 70% of the population.
00:11:04.000 So it's white people.
00:11:06.000 They love it.
00:11:07.000 White people want to hear about them being dumb and being murdered.
00:11:11.000 We are the weirdest race, I think.
00:11:14.000 In that we're the only ethnomasochists.
00:11:16.000 Like when I was a kid, I used to, like 20 years old, I used to listen to this rapper named Paris.
00:11:23.000 And he was openly racist, talked about killing cops.
00:11:27.000 Cops ain't shit, ain't shit.
00:11:29.000 The only motherfucking pig that I eat is police.
00:11:31.000 And I'd be there with my headphones.
00:11:35.000 His first album was called The Devil Made Me Do It, meaning I murder white people and cops because of this racist world that we live in.
00:11:43.000 And I'm getting revenge.
00:11:45.000 And I was like, yeah, you do that.
00:11:46.000 Kill those cops, kill those white people.
00:11:48.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:49.000 You are cool.
00:11:53.000 Can you imagine a Mexican dancing to kill the Mexicans?
00:11:59.000 The only motherfucking mestizos I eat are Aztecs.
00:12:04.000 Yeah, Paris, go kill some cops.
00:12:05.000 You're a badass.
00:12:07.000 I did my part in the movie, though.
00:12:08.000 So there's this one part where they were talking about...
00:12:10.000 So there's a gay couple.
00:12:12.000 The main character's girlfriend's brother's gay, right?
00:12:16.000 White gay guy, black gay guy.
00:12:18.000 And then they're like, they're bitching about how the gentrification.
00:12:23.000 Yeah, gentrification of neighborhoods.
00:12:24.000 They give up gentrificays.
00:12:26.000 They're talking about the gentrification.
00:12:28.000 And they're like...
00:12:29.000 Tell the story as Tony Soprano.
00:12:30.000 So these smokes are talking about how the white people come in and they're building up the fucking houses.
00:12:37.000 But the black people, they don't got a place to live because they got these nice buildings with apartments.
00:12:43.000 And then the white guy, the couple, says, oh, you'll be like this apartment that we're in right now?
00:12:48.000 And I go, oh, in the theater.
00:12:52.000 And I'm like, that's true.
00:12:54.000 And I think maybe Jordan Peele, maybe he's heard that from his circle of friends.
00:12:59.000 I'm thinking, why Did he put that in there?
00:13:00.000 Because that applies to him.
00:13:02.000 Is he self-deprecating, or did he get hit with that from other people that are living in this apartment?
00:13:08.000 So he's saying, Hey, you too.
00:13:09.000 Yeah, I'm probably going to Mr. Fire because he's probably starting to meet black people now for the first time in his life.
00:13:15.000 And they're genuine black people.
00:13:16.000 And they're like, Yo, what's up?
00:13:17.000 Yo, Jordan, man.
00:13:18.000 This is a fucking dope spot.
00:13:20.000 He's like, I've lived here my whole life.
00:13:22.000 This is my mom's apartment in the upper west side.
00:13:25.000 By the way, show everyone your tactical walls.
00:13:27.000 Oh, hell yeah.
00:13:28.000 Maybe we should have put them lower.
00:13:31.000 I can move them.
00:13:33.000 So we've got Billy Bologna and Pee Wee there, some mugs.
00:13:37.000 It's black on black, so it's kind of hard to see.
00:13:39.000 I have, you know, the Candyman, by the way, did kill a black kid in it.
00:13:45.000 So that kind of threw it off.
00:13:46.000 It's like, are you, is this like a white people suck or not?
00:13:49.000 And then it turns out that the white woman actually saved the black baby.
00:13:54.000 So it's founded on racism.
00:13:56.000 This whole thing is founded on racism.
00:13:59.000 And then they just abandoned that halfway through.
00:14:01.000 It's trying to be fair and balanced.
00:14:03.000 It's insane.
00:14:04.000 Let's get to the news.
00:14:06.000 This was funny.
00:14:07.000 We're going to talk about the war on kids soon, but I want to have some fun first.
00:14:12.000 Someone, Bart Simpson, pranked an education town hall, and it worked beautifully.
00:14:16.000 You're showing your notes.
00:14:20.000 And it's rarely a prank goes this well.
00:14:26.000 You guys work for us in this environment.
00:14:30.000 You work to us.
00:14:32.000 These town halls, it's exactly like when they have Mark Zuckerberg in front of the Senate committee.
00:14:37.000 It's all just bullshit.
00:14:38.000 You're allowed to let off steam.
00:14:39.000 It's like going to the dog park and letting your dog run around to let off some steam.
00:14:44.000 They just sit there and they take abuse.
00:14:45.000 It means nothing to them.
00:14:47.000 Some old lady saying, you work for us, like that's just water off a duck's back.
00:14:52.000 But anyway, that's not what I pulled this up.
00:14:53.000 Play it.
00:14:54.000 I'm asking that you do not pass this policy in Virginia.
00:14:58.000 Thank you so much, Ms. Thomas.
00:14:59.000 We do appreciate you.
00:15:04.000 Phil McCracken.
00:15:08.000 Phil McCracken.
00:15:09.000 Phil McCracken.
00:15:11.000 I learned so many from this.
00:15:14.000 That's a plumber's van I saw in the Bronx.
00:15:17.000 Really?
00:15:21.000 Salk, Suk, Mahidik.
00:15:27.000 Suk, Mahiddik.
00:15:29.000 Suk, Mahidik.
00:15:31.000 Ophelia McHawk.
00:15:34.000 Ophelia Mike.
00:15:35.000 Ophelia McHawk.
00:15:39.000 Are you seeing a pattern here, sir?
00:15:40.000 Eileen Dover.
00:15:43.000 That one.
00:15:44.000 That one's a good one.
00:15:45.000 Eileen Dover.
00:15:46.000 That's a nice break from the Felicio.
00:15:50.000 Don Kittick.
00:15:53.000 Oh, Donkey Dick.
00:15:55.000 Yeah.
00:15:56.000 Don Kittick.
00:16:00.000 Wayne Kerr.
00:16:04.000 That's a true.
00:16:05.000 Wayne Kerr.
00:16:05.000 That's a British colloquialism.
00:16:08.000 Damn.
00:16:09.000 So that was fantastic.
00:16:11.000 Also in the funny news, Hassan Piker, right?
00:16:14.000 Remember we were making fun of him last week?
00:16:15.000 So he has a shirt on that says the rich should pay their fair share.
00:16:19.000 And then we find out that he just bought a $3 million mansion.
00:16:21.000 So he is the rich.
00:16:22.000 And then the best part was all these socialists saying that's not that much money, you know.
00:16:27.000 The real problem is the billionaires, not the millionaires.
00:16:31.000 Okay, so millionaires aren't rich to modern socialists.
00:16:33.000 Gotcha.
00:16:35.000 But now he appears to be on a PR.
00:16:39.000 I think he's hired a PR firm because when you Google him now, you get the mansion.
00:16:43.000 He doesn't want that to be the top result.
00:16:45.000 So this is a Twitter moment, which you can pay for.
00:16:50.000 And it's from Digital Culture Insider.
00:16:52.000 Have you ever heard of that before?
00:16:53.000 No.
00:16:54.000 No, it's a pay-to-play fucking magazine.
00:16:57.000 So click on it.
00:17:00.000 So this irrelevant magazine nobody's heard of puts out a story about how he's an awesome dude and you should forget about the mansion.
00:17:08.000 And then it's the top Twitter moment.
00:17:13.000 Look, what's the headline says it all.
00:17:15.000 Leftist Reamer Sean Piger faces criticism for buying a home, but Gen Z's favorite pundit says he's determined to change the right's narrative about progress.
00:17:26.000 Progressives, yeah.
00:17:27.000 Progressives.
00:17:30.000 Isn't that fucking funny?
00:17:32.000 That's going to be an underlying thread here, too, about how journalism doesn't exist and it's all just activism or pay-to-play or it's got nothing to do with the news.
00:17:41.000 And that's why America's distrust of the media is at an all-time high.
00:17:46.000 It's never been worse.
00:17:47.000 Never.
00:17:48.000 It's never been more ridiculous.
00:17:50.000 And you can tell it's dripping with irony.
00:17:55.000 Like, who was this gay gay dude?
00:18:01.000 Like, go to 3.6.
00:18:04.000 I'm reading this article about Michael Eilig, and I'm just like, this guy's gay.
00:18:09.000 This author's gay.
00:18:10.000 I can tell.
00:18:12.000 Club kids bid final farewell to party monster killer, Michael Eilig.
00:18:16.000 Whenever you see a headline, it wasn't written by the writer.
00:18:19.000 Please know that.
00:18:20.000 He doesn't call him a killer in the article.
00:18:22.000 This black queer wants to defend him because he's gay, and the writer is an activist.
00:18:29.000 So he calls him troubled.
00:18:32.000 Bid their farewell to the troubled but legendary club promoter who passed away of an apparent drug overdose.
00:18:39.000 It wasn't an apparent drug overdose.
00:18:40.000 It was a drug overdose.
00:18:41.000 He OD'd, probably on purpose.
00:18:44.000 But Michael Eilick sawed a man to pieces.
00:18:50.000 He took a Hispanic drug dealer, murdered him, cut off his head and his arms, put him in a bag, and threw him in a dumpster.
00:19:03.000 He said he felt bad, and he had a bad feeling, and that's because he thought he was going to get caught.
00:19:10.000 He's a homicidal murderer.
00:19:12.000 And he had that little trans kid, Desmond is Amazing, on his show.
00:19:18.000 And behind the kid was a Rohipnol painting.
00:19:23.000 Roofies are used to drug and have sex with people that wouldn't normally have sex with you.
00:19:30.000 I mean, we're getting to levels of Satan here with this war on kids and inept journalism.
00:19:36.000 Hey, now.
00:19:38.000 Have you ever seen this?
00:19:40.000 What's these are back in my gay club days?
00:19:44.000 Doesn't my face look gay?
00:19:46.000 Is that you and Michael Ehlig?
00:19:47.000 Yeah.
00:19:48.000 Yeah, you do look like a homo in my life.
00:19:50.000 My fucking face looks real gay.
00:19:51.000 You know what you look like?
00:19:52.000 You look like a homo who gets used and abused.
00:19:56.000 And then like wonders why nobody picks up his call and got them done.
00:19:59.000 Yeah, like the amount of fucking that happens to you is just sad.
00:20:03.000 Like it would break a father's heart, even one that doesn't love you like your dad.
00:20:08.000 It would break another father's heart, just somebody who's a father of a different child.
00:20:12.000 Yeah, it's like, does he hate himself that much?
00:20:16.000 Yeah, he was having a party monster movie release or something like that.
00:20:21.000 And this girl I was with at the time was like, I used to write him when he was in jail.
00:20:26.000 I'm a big fan of him.
00:20:27.000 Why is?
00:20:27.000 I don't know.
00:20:28.000 Why was she a big fan of?
00:20:31.000 I think.
00:20:32.000 He's my favorite murderer.
00:20:34.000 Like, if someone is rumored to be racist, then you can't even go to their house.
00:20:40.000 Like, they're the worst thing in the world.
00:20:43.000 And they're not even genuinely racist.
00:20:44.000 It's just understood that they are.
00:20:46.000 They're canceled persona on grada.
00:20:48.000 But if you're gay and you chop up a Puerto Rican, it's fun.
00:20:52.000 You're legendary, but troubled.
00:20:56.000 It's like non-white male privilege.
00:21:00.000 Non-straight white male privilege.
00:21:06.000 It's also easy to cancel someone like Copper Cab, who has been kicked off YouTube.
00:21:11.000 And as usual with these things, we have no idea why.
00:21:13.000 I think it might be me.
00:21:15.000 And I think I know why.
00:21:17.000 I think I know why.
00:21:19.000 I think it's because he's on this network, or he was.
00:21:21.000 He stopped submitting.
00:21:22.000 And people always say, what happened to that person?
00:21:25.000 I don't like nagging people.
00:21:27.000 It's not my job.
00:21:28.000 So if you're not enthusiastically making shows, I'm not going to call you and say, where's your show?
00:21:33.000 Like AIU, I've never asked him where his show is once, and they just keep popping up.
00:21:39.000 That's great.
00:21:41.000 So that's what happened with Copper Cab.
00:21:42.000 He stopped submitting, and I didn't bother nagging him.
00:21:44.000 But now he's lost YouTube.
00:21:46.000 And I don't think this is a troll, but he's been crying all week.
00:21:50.000 Yeah.
00:21:51.000 Non-stop crying.
00:21:52.000 I don't think this is fake at all, actually.
00:22:02.000 Dude.
00:22:11.000 YouTube.
00:22:12.000 That's not very bad.
00:22:13.000 YouTube.
00:22:13.000 What's YouTube?
00:22:14.000 Something I've loved doing for my whole life.
00:22:21.000 Please, anybody that can help me get my channel back, I would appreciate it.
00:22:29.000 That's not a joke.
00:22:30.000 I don't know why my channel has been terminated, but it's something I've worked on for the majority of my life.
00:22:40.000 It's not a joke.
00:22:44.000 That's just one of them.
00:22:45.000 It's like milk crates.
00:22:46.000 The milk crate challenge.
00:22:48.000 We could sit here and watch crying copper cap videos all day.
00:22:51.000 Go to 1-8, totally different one.
00:22:54.000 Just crying his eyes out.
00:23:04.000 Turn it up.
00:23:07.000 Relax.
00:23:08.000 Yeah, relax.
00:23:11.000 I feel like a piece of me has been cut out.
00:23:16.000 I've been on YouTube for 11 years, and all I want to do is make people happy and smile and laugh.
00:23:26.000 I wonder what kind of revenue he was making.
00:23:30.000 We were paying him well, and there was no incentive for him to keep sending in shit.
00:23:39.000 I mean, I guess it is a big deal if it was paying his bills for like years.
00:23:44.000 And Mimos, whatever he calls his grandmother.
00:23:47.000 Mima?
00:23:48.000 Mima.
00:23:49.000 Jesus Christ, Mr. You okay in there?
00:23:53.000 So I was thinking, why doesn't he just stream here?
00:23:57.000 Like he uses StreamYards, which is like a third-party platform.
00:24:01.000 That's where he gets his donations and stuff.
00:24:03.000 And then that sends it off to YouTube.
00:24:05.000 So all the interactions he's doing is through this StreamYards or whatever.
00:24:09.000 When we call him.
00:24:10.000 And then he could send it here.
00:24:12.000 Yeah.
00:24:14.000 He has a platform.
00:24:17.000 Some of them could be free even, so he still has that whole deal.
00:24:26.000 I'm calling Copper Cab the crybaby.
00:24:34.000 It's ringing.
00:24:36.000 It is.
00:24:36.000 Not the most scintillating.
00:24:39.000 Hello?
00:24:40.000 Hey, Crybaby.
00:24:42.000 Hey, what's going on, man?
00:24:43.000 Are you finally stopped crying?
00:24:46.000 Yeah, I'm not crying right now.
00:24:48.000 I have you on the air.
00:24:50.000 I should warn you.
00:24:52.000 I think it's illegal for me not to tell you that.
00:24:55.000 No, it's fine.
00:24:58.000 Do you want to Skype in?
00:25:02.000 I'm not able to right now.
00:25:04.000 How's it going?
00:25:05.000 Pretty good.
00:25:06.000 Why don't you just live stream on sensor.tv?
00:25:09.000 We have the software.
00:25:10.000 I didn't know that you had the software to live stream.
00:25:13.000 I thought you just did videos.
00:25:14.000 We didn't, but we got it now.
00:25:17.000 Oh, that's pretty great.
00:25:18.000 Yeah, and what the best news about this is, and the most exciting thing for you going forward, both financially and with viewers, is I can 100% guarantee that.
00:25:29.000 You just hung up?
00:25:30.000 You are terrible.
00:25:36.000 That is not nice at all.
00:25:39.000 See, that's why I worry about my kids, because I'm so mean that I guess they got the mean gene.
00:25:45.000 Oh, my phone's blowing up.
00:25:47.000 I wonder what that's all about.
00:25:50.000 Speaking of the clientele here at Censored, Jacob Wall is still on trial for those robocalls.
00:26:01.000 Look at Amy Siskins getting involved, our favorite nutty Karen liberal.
00:26:06.000 The FCC proposed a $5 million fine against Jacob Wall and Jack Berkman for election robocalls and one of its largest penalties to date.
00:26:13.000 Womp womp.
00:26:15.000 Yeah, I mean, this is what the left keeps doing.
00:26:18.000 They celebrate victories before they've happened.
00:26:20.000 Who gives a fuck what the FCC proposed?
00:26:24.000 That's irrelevant.
00:26:24.000 Maybe we should call him.
00:26:28.000 Yes, Epp just dropped late last night.
00:26:30.000 He held out until the very last minute so he could get all the up-to-date details.
00:26:36.000 Who?
00:26:37.000 Jacob.
00:26:37.000 Usually he sends it a day before, but like South Park.
00:26:41.000 So it's up on the site now?
00:26:43.000 Yes.
00:26:46.000 I haven't checked the site since the fight.
00:26:48.000 Hey there, Gavin.
00:26:49.000 How are you?
00:26:50.000 Hey, man, you're on the air, just so you know.
00:26:52.000 I have to legally tell you that.
00:26:55.000 We're looking forward to checking out your episode, but just quickly, who cares what they propose?
00:27:00.000 That's not a sentence.
00:27:01.000 It's just they proposed a $5 million fine, right?
00:27:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:27:06.000 Yeah, big deal.
00:27:07.000 Yeah.
00:27:08.000 Well, you know, and it's just remarkable because the Supreme Court has made clear that that entire law that they reference concerning robocalls only has to do with commercial calls,
00:27:27.000 you know, where they call you and say, here's your free vacation.
00:27:30.000 Right, yeah.
00:27:31.000 Calls of that nature.
00:27:33.000 And made clear in a case called Barr versus American Association of Political Consultants, where actually the Trump Justice Department was trying to pursue political robocalls, that the law just doesn't apply to political speech.
00:27:45.000 You can say what you want, how you want to say it.
00:27:48.000 And the other thing is that that whole law is litigated by the FTC, the Federal Trade Commission, not the FCC.
00:27:56.000 So they don't have jurisdiction.
00:27:58.000 The law doesn't apply.
00:28:00.000 But they needed a distraction.
00:28:02.000 And so they typed up this sham document, essentially, and then blasted it out to the media and said, we're proposing a $5.1 million fine.
00:28:13.000 Ridiculous.
00:28:14.000 Okay, I'll talk to you later.
00:28:15.000 I got to get off the air.
00:28:16.000 Sounds good.
00:28:17.000 Okay.
00:28:18.000 So you can check that out on the site.
00:28:20.000 This is like when I sued the SPLC, they filed a motion to dismiss, and then the ADL goes, we agree with your motion to dismiss.
00:28:28.000 What are you doing here?
00:28:31.000 No one asked you.
00:28:35.000 But there's Amy Siskind already celebrating.
00:28:37.000 She really is a fucking mental cunt.
00:28:39.000 Go to 2-0.
00:28:40.000 I'm not seeking her out, by the way.
00:28:42.000 This just appears on my feed from other people.
00:28:45.000 Like, go to 2-0.
00:28:47.000 That's 1-9.
00:28:52.000 These posts were made exactly one year apart.
00:28:54.000 The left has a flawed ideology that holds zero consistency.
00:28:58.000 Trump is taking a page from Putin's playbook and trying to bully the FDA into making a COVID-19 vaccine available before stage three of testing.
00:29:05.000 He will kill us all.
00:29:06.000 And then, I think we've already shown this.
00:29:09.000 Let it rain vaccine mandates.
00:29:16.000 Okay, now, so I start out, just like the New York Post, I start out nice and light, talk about our friends, and then we slowly get more serious.
00:29:27.000 Kids in China can only play video games for three hours a week.
00:29:32.000 Damn.
00:29:32.000 Now, I hate communism.
00:29:34.000 I hate the government mandating everything, but this just shows you that they are aware of the shit that our kids are seeing.
00:29:45.000 I mean, they own TikTok, right?
00:29:48.000 And you don't know kids.
00:29:49.000 I do.
00:29:50.000 My kids, my goal is to get them down to two hours a day on weekdays.
00:29:54.000 That sounds like a ton.
00:29:56.000 It's not.
00:29:57.000 I mean, in the grand scheme of things, like they're going to hate my guts.
00:30:00.000 They're going to call me Nazi dad, just like everyone else does, for doing that.
00:30:06.000 And it's just going to be Sunday night, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.
00:30:10.000 Friday night, you can go crazy.
00:30:12.000 I'll just tell them to get off when I think it's been too long.
00:30:15.000 But these other kids, they sit there, they lie down.
00:30:19.000 Like your average seven-year-old will just lie down and thumb through TikTok for hours and hours and hours.
00:30:28.000 And a lot of parents won't regulate it at all.
00:30:31.000 They don't say, all right, that's enough screen time.
00:30:33.000 Let's get outside.
00:30:36.000 That's the freaky part.
00:30:37.000 I know parents who don't have bedtime in the summer for their kids and they let them stay up all night.
00:30:46.000 So the kids are going to bed at 8 a.m.
00:30:48.000 And I'm not talking about trailer trash.
00:30:51.000 Or I was talking about how my parameters with my daughter are no chokers, right?
00:30:57.000 Even if it's just a lazy one, that means I give head.
00:31:00.000 And if it's a studded one, it means I'm your bitch.
00:31:03.000 I'm your sex slave.
00:31:05.000 So no.
00:31:06.000 No nose ring because it leaves a permanent hole that looks ugly or eyebrow ring.
00:31:11.000 And then no ripped tights because it means I like getting raped.
00:31:15.000 I'm a whore.
00:31:16.000 Again, she's kind of punky, so this comes up.
00:31:18.000 And then no, like some of her friends are wearing these like Catholic schoolgirl skirts that barely cover the bottom of their ass cheeks.
00:31:26.000 And I said to the mom, I'm like, I don't allow any of that.
00:31:28.000 And she goes, oh, live and let live.
00:31:31.000 Live and let live?
00:31:33.000 What?
00:31:35.000 It's not a stranger.
00:31:36.000 It's your child.
00:31:48.000 What are you showing me?
00:31:49.000 Kids freaking out over these phones.
00:31:52.000 Remember that video of that mom who took her daughter's phone on the plane and the daughter is climbing all over the seats, freaking out, trying to get it back.
00:32:01.000 It's like a crack addiction.
00:32:02.000 I mean, I guess we watched a lot of TV in the 80s.
00:32:05.000 Yeah, but I wouldn't freak out if somebody turned it off.
00:32:09.000 We did watch Saturday morning cartoons from like 7 till 11, 8, 9, 10, 11.
00:32:14.000 That's not much.
00:32:16.000 But look what it does to kids' brains.
00:32:18.000 So this is the internet generation, the TikTok generation.
00:32:22.000 I don't know what this is.
00:32:24.000 I don't want to know.
00:32:25.000 But it's a good example of the absolute filth garbage that Has been pushed on our youth to the point where their brains are just shit.
00:32:36.000 So these are guys who grew up staring at screens all day, and this is their werewolf acting challenge.
00:32:43.000 My face.
00:32:44.000 You're the blue line.
00:32:45.000 Kiss my face.
00:32:46.000 Scram!
00:32:47.000 Get out of here!
00:32:48.000 Are you werewolf?
00:32:53.000 Holy frick!
00:32:54.000 Does that answer your question?
00:32:56.000 You're so hot.
00:32:57.000 Marry me.
00:32:58.000 Sorry, sweet cheeks.
00:33:00.000 I only marry werewolf chicks, and you're not even- Never judge a book by its cover.
00:33:09.000 Now shut up and let's make some puppies, you rascal.
00:33:18.000 So I guess they're reenacting some cartoon or it's some furry cosplay thing.
00:33:27.000 It's a furries thing.
00:33:28.000 Maybe there's a furries cartoon where this werewolf meets another werewolf and doesn't realize it at first.
00:33:34.000 So then guys who probably aren't even gay are reenacting these sexual scenes?
00:33:39.000 Like, remember I said Ryan when he looked like a twink in that picture?
00:33:43.000 It looked like he'd had his brains fucked out?
00:33:47.000 They had their brains fucked out.
00:33:50.000 Like, they're garbage.
00:33:53.000 You just saw two men with garbage in their heads.
00:33:57.000 If you could open up their skulls, you'd just see, like, shit, an old cocaine.
00:34:01.000 It would look like Jaws' stomach.
00:34:03.000 There'd be a license plate, a report card, some kid's shoe.
00:34:08.000 They couldn't carry a tomb to save their lives.
00:34:11.000 Look at this other one, two, three.
00:34:18.000 No?
00:34:20.000 You're showing us your computer, my dear.
00:34:22.000 It's getting a little load here.
00:34:25.000 It's a Reddit link, but.
00:34:26.000 It won't load?
00:34:27.000 It seems to not load.
00:34:29.000 Oh, here we go.
00:34:32.000 So I guess this guy does it, and then people act with him?
00:34:35.000 Oh, okay.
00:34:36.000 Yeah, it's a collaboration.
00:34:41.000 Like, imagine this, the bearded guys.
00:34:44.000 Imagine both of their dads.
00:34:45.000 I want to meet their dads.
00:34:47.000 Acting challenge.
00:34:48.000 You're the blue line.
00:34:50.000 Okay.
00:34:51.000 Scream!
00:34:52.000 Get out of here!
00:34:53.000 Are you werewolf?
00:34:55.000 Ow, ow, ow!
00:34:59.000 Does that answer your question?
00:35:00.000 You're so hot.
00:35:02.000 Marry me.
00:35:03.000 Sorry, sweet cheeks.
00:35:04.000 I only marry werewolf chicks, and you're not even...
00:35:07.000 Ow, ow, ow!
00:35:08.000 Wolf emoji!
00:35:09.000 Wait, you're...
00:35:10.000 Never judge a book by its cover.
00:35:13.000 Now shut up and let's make some puppies, you rascal.
00:35:16.000 Oh, you're one bad dog.
00:35:20.000 I don't know.
00:35:21.000 Is it a- it's a joke?
00:35:22.000 What is it?
00:35:23.000 Is it mocking something?
00:35:25.000 I mean...
00:35:25.000 Like, is it like Sam Heidi where it's like, this is just a bad thing?
00:35:29.000 I feel like a flat earther who just walked to the edge of Earth, and I'm looking down at the abyss and going, or like then the Truman show, where he gets to the edge there.
00:35:38.000 Like, we've reached the edge of masculinity.
00:35:45.000 The garbage that is online.
00:35:47.000 I want to show you this Dharman video because the acting reminded me of that.
00:35:53.000 It might be the stupidest thing that's ever existed in the world.
00:35:58.000 Ryan, it's even stupider than you.
00:36:01.000 I think you would have written a better Dharman.
00:36:04.000 So I want to get into the war on kids, which is going to get pretty serious, but let's just finish with some more internet garbage crap, and then we can get serious.
00:36:16.000 Okay?
00:36:24.000 Okay, this is the worst Dharman I've ever seen.
00:36:27.000 They're getting worse.
00:36:28.000 I don't think he has anything to do with them anymore.
00:36:30.000 He just hires people with learning disabilities.
00:36:33.000 And I don't think there's even a director there.
00:36:36.000 Because the way these people overact, surely someone would be there and go, take it down a notch, take it down a notch.
00:36:42.000 So anyway, this one's called Gold Digger Takes Advantage of Nice Guy.
00:36:46.000 She instantly regrets it.
00:36:50.000 And it's Darman.
00:36:51.000 Of course it is.
00:36:52.000 Can I get you ladies anything else?
00:36:55.000 How about some shots of 1942?
00:36:58.000 Aren't those like 50 bucks a shot?
00:37:00.000 Yeah, so.
00:37:02.000 So you missed the very beginning.
00:37:04.000 She says when this guy had a Honda, she just got rid of him right away, which doesn't make any sense because she's dating a sugar daddy.
00:37:10.000 Are you talking about years ago?
00:37:12.000 Ever since I started dating Nelson over here, you're dating Nelson?
00:37:20.000 Why?
00:37:21.000 You'll see.
00:37:22.000 Women come out really bad in this video.
00:37:25.000 It's basically sexist because she's not just the only money-grubbing cunt.
00:37:30.000 They also mooch off of him, which is odd.
00:37:34.000 But the craziest thing about this, I'm going to ruin the ending for you, is he dumps her at the end when he finds out she's a sugar daddy.
00:37:40.000 He's a sugar daddy, which is retarded on many levels.
00:37:44.000 But the way you do a parable, a soliloquy, a story, a biblical verse, the way it's supposed to happen is you do a bad thing and then you get punished with it for it.
00:37:57.000 The boy who cried wolf, right?
00:37:59.000 Help, help, help.
00:37:59.000 And then he really needs help and no one's there.
00:38:03.000 In this version of events, all she does is get dumped by a guy that she doesn't give a shit about.
00:38:09.000 So the moral of the story is you can rob someone for a whole year and take all their shit and make them pay for everything and your punishment will be nothing.
00:38:19.000 That's like the boy who cried wolf never gets a real wolf and there's never an attack.
00:38:24.000 That's not how these are supposed to work, Dar.
00:38:28.000 Dumb man.
00:38:31.000 I'm sorry that you're a little bit late.
00:38:33.000 We were just finishing up.
00:38:34.000 Oh.
00:38:35.000 So in this thing, he doesn't grab the check right away, which is weird, because if he's a sugar daddy, then he would just grab the check instinctively.
00:38:43.000 That's how it works.
00:38:44.000 And I know sugar daddies.
00:38:46.000 They go, they're doing great right now because of the pandemic.
00:38:49.000 All these young hot girls are broke.
00:38:51.000 So they go, let's fly to Barbados.
00:38:53.000 And it's a given that we're not really boyfriend and girlfriend.
00:38:56.000 I'm just, I'll buy you a purse and I'll take you to Barbados and I'll fuck you and then you get to go to Barbados and have a nice purse.
00:39:02.000 That's what's going on in America right now.
00:39:04.000 And I'm not even sure it's immoral.
00:39:07.000 I mean, it's not my cup of tea, but if two consenting adults are okay with it.
00:39:14.000 All right, I wasn't that hungry, anyways.
00:39:17.000 All right, here we go.
00:39:17.000 Three shots of 1942.
00:39:20.000 Can I get you a water answer?
00:39:26.000 Everyone acts like they're being touched in their genitalia for the first time.
00:39:30.000 I got it.
00:39:36.000 I gotta fill all the seconds with acting.
00:39:40.000 I left my card at home.
00:39:42.000 Okay, this is gonna get tedious real fast.
00:39:44.000 This is 14 minutes.
00:39:45.000 Don't worry, we're not doing the full 14 minutes.
00:39:49.000 Quick about this acting.
00:39:52.000 Now I can't.
00:39:54.000 So I just feel really bad.
00:39:55.000 I think she has really bad skin, you can see in other things.
00:39:58.000 You know what?
00:39:59.000 Somehow, this sugar daddy's not used to always paying for shit.
00:40:03.000 So skip ahead.
00:40:05.000 Now they're shopping for clothes.
00:40:09.000 And he's paying for it all.
00:40:10.000 So they just had like a $500 lunch and now they're going on a $1,000 shopping spree.
00:40:17.000 Hey, find anything you like?
00:40:20.000 Yeah.
00:40:21.000 He's got a Mexican accent.
00:40:24.000 But I probably shouldn't be buying anything right now.
00:40:27.000 Why not?
00:40:28.000 I didn't want to tell you.
00:40:32.000 No, I shouldn't.
00:40:33.000 Hey.
00:40:34.000 Hey.
00:40:35.000 I can find you.
00:40:37.000 I'm a five-foot-tall Mexican.
00:40:39.000 Besides the bad skin, you're basically at eight, nine.
00:40:44.000 My dad just lost his job, so I'm not stressful at home lately.
00:40:49.000 I could be, but I'm so sorry.
00:40:52.000 I just thought buying for you.
00:40:53.000 Buy me, my friend's dresses.
00:40:55.000 Okay, skip forward.
00:40:56.000 She buys the dresses.
00:40:57.000 Wait, no.
00:40:59.000 Now I feel veggies.
00:41:01.000 You see that?
00:41:01.000 The eyes?
00:41:06.000 Oh my god, that might be a drop, dude.
00:41:09.000 Okay, so he...
00:41:11.000 He buys them all.
00:41:13.000 And then she throws in some things for her friends.
00:41:16.000 Keep going.
00:41:18.000 I'll be right back.
00:41:19.000 I'm going to get a couple more pieces from the dressing room.
00:41:21.000 Oh, I get it.
00:41:23.000 They never fuck.
00:41:26.000 I see.
00:41:27.000 No, I. I'll see you outside.
00:41:30.000 Okay, sounds good.
00:41:32.000 How are you getting somewhere like that?
00:41:34.000 I didn't know you were friends with Jennifer.
00:41:36.000 She's actually my girlfriend.
00:41:38.000 Is this all refugees?
00:41:40.000 I didn't know you were friends with Jennifer.
00:41:43.000 I remember this when we had an ad agency, we'd be doing like a cell phone ad, and the people would show up to audition and they had accents.
00:41:49.000 And I'm like, what are you doing?
00:41:50.000 Where do you get the nerve to come and waste my time?
00:41:53.000 If we have someone with an accent in a cell phone ad, people will think it's like a German cell phone company.
00:41:59.000 But they were just so arrogant, probably rich.
00:42:01.000 Like, I'm going to go to America and be an actor because no one can tell my accent.
00:42:06.000 I didn't know you know Jenapur.
00:42:09.000 Is he deaf?
00:42:10.000 Was this named something different?
00:42:11.000 Hot girl takes advantage of nice guy.
00:42:15.000 Looks like he changed it to gold digger.
00:42:18.000 Weird.
00:42:19.000 Interesting.
00:42:19.000 Wait, that's so weird.
00:42:21.000 That is a little weird.
00:42:22.000 She's just a hot girl, and now she's a gold digger.
00:42:25.000 Oh, I guess he realized that it was sexist, that he was just bitching about women.
00:42:30.000 Okay, go ahead.
00:42:31.000 We should wrap this up.
00:42:32.000 We've been going off for a month.
00:42:34.000 We've been going up for these dresses for her.
00:42:37.000 Are you crazy?
00:42:38.000 No, don't do that.
00:42:40.000 No, she's basically the biggest user in town.
00:42:44.000 Everyone knows that.
00:42:45.000 Okay, what are you talking about?
00:42:48.000 Do you remember Billy?
00:42:50.000 Billy from high school?
00:42:51.000 Yeah.
00:42:52.000 Are they both special?
00:42:55.000 Dharman's been using this guy in tons of videos.
00:42:58.000 Maybe this is free labor.
00:43:00.000 Maybe they're doing it for like 40 bucks.
00:43:04.000 She's been using everyone.
00:43:05.000 She said, user in town.
00:43:07.000 So anyway, he goes to Billy and finds out, oh, this is when she's having a party and he's not invited.
00:43:16.000 So this changes things.
00:43:17.000 I thought she was fucking him.
00:43:18.000 But if she won't even let him kiss her, then there's zero sex.
00:43:23.000 So this is just robbery, right?
00:43:25.000 So this woman, this evil bitch, and her friends are robbing this guy of thousands of dollars.
00:43:30.000 I bet it's going to be a really rough punishment at the end.
00:43:33.000 Yeah, we literally just decided this, like, a few minutes ago.
00:43:36.000 Check out this action coming up.
00:43:38.000 Hey, Jennifer.
00:43:40.000 See how you're playing seven?
00:43:41.000 We'll bring a bottle.
00:43:42.000 Can't wait.
00:43:44.000 We're dudes.
00:43:45.000 He's sad.
00:43:46.000 He's Napoleon Dynamite sad guy.
00:43:50.000 Hey, I'm a dude.
00:43:51.000 I carry my coat on my shoulder like a dude does.
00:43:55.000 All right, so he's slowly starting to figure shit out.
00:44:00.000 She comes over.
00:44:02.000 Wait, go back a bit.
00:44:03.000 He's wearing pajamas with sneakers.
00:44:05.000 What the fuck is that about?
00:44:06.000 But she comes over.
00:44:07.000 She says, my mom's really sick.
00:44:09.000 All of this could be wrapped up in like a two-minute video.
00:44:12.000 I don't know why he had to drag this out for 15 minutes.
00:44:15.000 She's all dressed up.
00:44:16.000 Her mom's sick.
00:44:17.000 He gets $500 for Venmo's or $500.
00:44:21.000 And then she smiles at her friends.
00:44:23.000 Can I borrow $500?
00:44:27.000 And she turns and smiles at them too when he's reaching down to Venmo.
00:44:33.000 That's called an actor acting.
00:44:36.000 Okay, so keep going.
00:44:39.000 He finally meets Billy.
00:44:41.000 She meets the parents, realizes that the dad works at Rodriguez Investments, and that's how she knows that Nelson is rich.
00:44:50.000 He's giving me a super nice gift.
00:44:53.000 So this is the end.
00:44:55.000 They're your anniversary.
00:44:56.000 They're going to exchange gifts.
00:44:57.000 She got him a Gucci wallet.
00:44:59.000 It's probably fake.
00:45:00.000 I got this on eBay.
00:45:01.000 I think it's fake.
00:45:03.000 Happy anniversary.
00:45:05.000 Happy anniversary.
00:45:07.000 This is her big punishment.
00:45:08.000 She's been robbing a man for a year.
00:45:11.000 Like, that's jail time, isn't it?
00:45:13.000 Oh.
00:45:13.000 I guess you could never prove it.
00:45:15.000 I shouldn't have.
00:45:17.000 You shouldn't have.
00:45:18.000 Wow, babe.
00:45:22.000 A wallet.
00:45:24.000 Thank you.
00:45:25.000 You're welcome.
00:45:27.000 And I got something for you, too.
00:45:31.000 You shouldn't have.
00:45:33.000 But before you open it, what is it?
00:45:38.000 Our relationship is over.
00:45:41.000 Whoa.
00:45:42.000 You're joking, right?
00:45:44.000 No.
00:45:45.000 That's the whole fucking thing.
00:45:47.000 I don't want to be with you anymore, Jennifer.
00:45:59.000 Um.
00:46:04.000 The thing I like about those guys is it doesn't seem very wiggery, you know?
00:46:09.000 They're not like, yo, what's up?
00:46:11.000 They just sound normal and they dress normal.
00:46:17.000 Or not normal, but they're not trying to be something they're not.
00:46:23.000 What's that other Darman Man video?
00:46:25.000 So the moral of the story, again, is if you rob a man for a year and manipulate him to pay your bills, your relationship will end after a year of free shit.
00:46:36.000 Sounds pretty bad, huh?
00:46:39.000 He doesn't do his endings anymore, does he?
00:46:41.000 No.
00:46:42.000 It's my weird hair.
00:46:43.000 Usually he like editorializes.
00:46:45.000 At the end, he's like, what you just saw is here's the moral to that.
00:46:51.000 Hey, don't be mean to retards.
00:46:55.000 Oh, so this is his main guy.
00:46:57.000 Oh, this one is good too.
00:46:58.000 Maybe I should have done that as the green screen.
00:47:00.000 He doesn't have enough money for a hot dog.
00:47:02.000 So Manuel reaches into the tip jar and gives him money.
00:47:07.000 Just give him the hot dog.
00:47:08.000 He acts like the mafia shaking him down and has a gun to his head.
00:47:12.000 Like, all right, pay us up.
00:47:13.000 Here we go.
00:47:16.000 We got our money?
00:47:17.000 I only have $1.50.
00:47:19.000 I'm so sorry.
00:47:21.000 Dude, why did you decide to become an actor?
00:47:24.000 You suck.
00:47:25.000 You can't speak the language and you don't get like Western mannerisms.
00:47:29.000 Neither of them, dude.
00:47:30.000 This is a Mexican and an Indian doing American stuff.
00:47:34.000 Really?
00:47:35.000 How many homeless Indian people are there?
00:47:37.000 What are you doing, Sammy?
00:47:39.000 I'm not just helping this man.
00:47:40.000 Here, give me that.
00:47:41.000 We're in the business of selling food, not giving it away.
00:47:43.000 You know how many homeless Indians there are in America?
00:47:46.000 Zero.
00:47:47.000 Negative 12.
00:47:50.000 The homeless Indians are back in India, obviously.
00:47:55.000 What was that one joke you had that one time in a dream, and then it turned out to not be funny?
00:47:59.000 You were like, how many people in the world don't want a million dollars?
00:48:03.000 Six.
00:48:04.000 Yeah.
00:48:04.000 Was that it?
00:48:05.000 Yeah, that's what it was.
00:48:07.000 No, it was how many people want money?
00:48:09.000 Eight.
00:48:10.000 And it's an understatement.
00:48:11.000 Obviously, everyone wants money.
00:48:12.000 And in my dream, I was like, I've just come up with the funniest thing ever.
00:48:15.000 It's going to be on t-shirts, bumper stickers.
00:48:18.000 I've changed the world with this amazing quip.
00:48:20.000 That's great.
00:48:21.000 Wait a minute.
00:48:22.000 I'm with the dad.
00:48:23.000 I mean, the dad, the owner of the hot dog place.
00:48:25.000 Don't give bums money and free food, or you're going to have bums around here.
00:48:29.000 Yeah, then that lowers the whole value of the place.
00:48:34.000 Now, nobody wants to go there because they're like, oh, what his eyebrows are.
00:48:38.000 Yeah.
00:48:38.000 And then he just throws out the food anyway.
00:52:14.000 village of protasia is we we're trying to help pedophiles stop molesting people.
00:52:19.000 But what they're really doing is justifying pedophilia, which is unjustifiable.
00:52:25.000 And I was just talking about how, I think I sent you this article about a Florida restaurant.
00:52:29.000 I was talking to some friends about my invention, the Dan Bongino stealing, probably through Matt Palombo, the American divorce.
00:52:37.000 This country is going through a divorce.
00:52:39.000 Florida restaurant doesn't want pro-Biden customers after U.S. troops killed in Kabul attack.
00:52:43.000 If you voted for him, don't come in here.
00:52:46.000 I don't want to be with you.
00:52:48.000 And the question the guy asked me says, who's getting the kids in this divorce?
00:52:52.000 And that's what I want to talk about today.
00:52:54.000 Because if they get the kids, it's not looking very good for us.
00:53:03.000 Go to 2-8.
00:53:06.000 No, what was it?
00:53:07.000 The one I asked you to send me.
00:53:09.000 Was it 2-6?
00:53:10.000 2-8.
00:53:11.000 2-8.
00:53:12.000 Yeah.
00:53:13.000 This is what happens to the kids if they get the kids.
00:53:15.000 Listen to this.
00:53:17.000 Lunacy.
00:53:18.000 Remember I said trans people just mentally ill-gays?
00:53:22.000 I said that in 2010.
00:53:24.000 10 years ago.
00:53:25.000 Non-binary.
00:53:27.000 I hope everyone knows that we need to protect that women and children has been used against marginalized people for most of human history.
00:53:39.000 These comments upset me because it's anti-trans, of course, but also it strikes me as anti-your own daughters.
00:53:46.000 Anti-youn people.
00:53:48.000 Anti-women.
00:53:50.000 If you are a young person, if you're a daughter, if you are a woman, would you do me a favor?
00:53:57.000 Please let all of the men in your life know that you can take care of yourself.
00:54:03.000 Let them know you don't need protecting and that you especially don't want protection if it means erasing trans people from public life.
00:54:15.000 I mean, that was perfect.
00:54:20.000 If there's one video that summarizes what we do on this show, there it is right there.
00:54:24.000 Your daughters don't need protecting.
00:54:27.000 This is what happens in the divorce if the left gets custody of the kids.
00:54:32.000 They don't have the children's best interest at heart.
00:54:36.000 You see it everywhere you go.
00:54:46.000 Like while these activist journalists are calling Michael Ehlig troubled and telling people that women and children don't need protecting, real journalists, and there's very few, they're probably 1%, real journalists like James O'Keefe has discovered that our open borders include child sex trafficking.
00:55:10.000 All of these gangs, MS-13, all of these Latino street gangs, they sponsor kids to come over.
00:55:18.000 And because the DNC knows that that means more votes for them, they totally turn a blind eye to the fact that this guy isn't bringing his son over.
00:55:27.000 This guy's not a foster parent.
00:55:28.000 He's a pimp.
00:55:30.000 They are child sex trafficked.
00:55:32.000 Who the fuck are these clients?
00:55:34.000 Why is there a demand for this?
00:55:38.000 He has 37 crimes against them, including at least three against a child, and he's still answered in the United States and working.
00:55:44.000 What you're seeing here is the FBI has notified that the Department of Health and Human Services received the fingerprints of an 18th Street gang member who is attempting or applying to become the sponsor for what's called a UAC.
00:55:59.000 A UAC means unaccompanied alien child.
00:56:02.000 We know what they're involved in, specifically sex trafficking.
00:56:05.000 Who's trying to become the sponsor for money struggle?
00:56:08.000 Every single one of these transnational organizations are involved with sex trafficking.
00:56:14.000 Gang members sponsoring unaccompanied children and no one blinks an eye.
00:56:18.000 Correct.
00:56:18.000 Children are the most vulnerable population of any society.
00:56:21.000 So when you're sending kids to a place with no family and the only possible family are these guardians that are known gang members, that's even more vulnerable.
00:56:29.000 And if in that time you informed the U.S. government that you have some type of fear of that your life is in jeopardy and you're put in what's called reasonable fear, then it is also called credible fear.
00:56:45.000 Once you make the declaration of my life is in danger, I may be harmed if I'm returned home, you're taken off the watchlist.
00:56:53.000 And so that makes it the giant loophole.
00:56:54.000 These are the people that are causing the danger in those four countries.
00:56:58.000 That's why they're on the actual transactional organized crime watchlist.
00:57:01.000 So they are allowed to stay in the country while they wait for their actual asylum claims.
00:57:07.000 They will be able to file for what is called the Connect Authorization Card.
00:57:11.000 It's essentially support permit.
00:57:13.000 So the issue you're saying is that the gang members are trying to get unaccompanied kids across the border sex trafficking.
00:57:21.000 And your concern for that exceeds whatever concern you have for your own personal well-being as a result of blowing the whistle.
00:57:29.000 I don't understand the part where you can worry about yourself more than something that is obviously very bad for either individual people, these kids, or for the rest of the country.
00:57:39.000 In one direction, you may lose your job, or the other direction you watch kids get raped and such stuff all over.
00:57:48.000 That's a pretty easy decision, right?
00:57:49.000 Pretty easy decision.
00:57:51.000 Choiceless choice, as we say.
00:57:52.000 Fantastic.
00:57:54.000 Why?
00:57:55.000 Where are all of these losers at Daily Beast and HuffPo and WAPO and The Guardian are obsessed with racism and catching someone saying the N-word?
00:58:08.000 Meanwhile, this is going on.
00:58:10.000 Where are the real journalists?
00:58:12.000 They're negligent and they're bureaucratic and they're inept, and that's true of the government.
00:58:16.000 The White House is a giant DMV.
00:58:18.000 All those moronic assholes who stare blankly at you when you go to renew your license, that's the White House.
00:58:24.000 That's why we have this dumb line where if you say you'll be killed if you go back home, we gave them a magic sentence.
00:58:32.000 If you say Candyman in the mirror, you can stay in America.
00:58:38.000 So I'm going to say it.
00:58:39.000 I'm a criminal.
00:58:41.000 Why would I do anything moral?
00:58:44.000 And we're going to see this with Afghanistani refugees.
00:58:50.000 Which brings me to another story about the idiocy of the left and the problem with the West and the endangerment of kids.
00:58:58.000 Remember those families that went to Afghanistan?
00:59:01.000 Now, they don't say this in any of the articles, but they must be Afghani refugees or Afghan.
00:59:08.000 I think Afghani is the name of the currency.
00:59:10.000 They just call them students, right?
00:59:12.000 Because they don't want to be politically incorrect.
00:59:14.000 So we don't know their ethnicity.
00:59:15.000 Dozens of California students, parents, stranded in Afghanistan after a summer trip abroad.
00:59:21.000 Now, the headline should be, Afghan retards bring their children to Afghanistan, the worst shithole in the world, because they want to visit their uncle or something, or they're homesick?
00:59:36.000 What were they thinking?
00:59:37.000 I had a house in Costa Rica for many years.
00:59:40.000 My kids, this was their first trip to Costa Rica was this summer because it's deadly there.
00:59:46.000 There's pit vipers, snakes that will give you necrosis, scorpions all over the place.
00:59:52.000 It's not a place for kids.
00:59:54.000 I thought Costa Rica, and we lived on a mountain, so you were taking an ATV up a 45-degree hill.
00:59:59.000 You could fall off down a cliff like the guy who did Caddy Shack and Animal House.
01:00:02.000 That's how he died, Doug Kenny.
01:00:04.000 So it was too safe, too unsafe.
01:00:06.000 I didn't want my kids there.
01:00:07.000 Well, Josh just moved there today.
01:00:10.000 He did?
01:00:11.000 Yes.
01:00:14.000 So maybe he should have been told this.
01:00:17.000 He moved to Costa.
01:00:19.000 Oh, yeah, his family's there.
01:00:21.000 They're on the other side.
01:00:22.000 I saw a Pepe in the clouds, and that's a good sign.
01:00:25.000 He should have flipped it so it looked more like it.
01:00:29.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:00:30.000 I remember that.
01:00:31.000 Yeah, I mean, it's a great country.
01:00:33.000 It's just hot as shit.
01:00:36.000 And not a good place for kids.
01:00:38.000 Anyway, sorry, that's a long tangent to say I thought Costa Rica was not great for kids, but Afghanistan?
01:00:44.000 And like, where's the stupid assholes?
01:00:47.000 Like, where's there's, I want more judgment.
01:00:49.000 I want more bias.
01:00:51.000 I want more prejudice.
01:00:52.000 I want more stigma.
01:00:54.000 So I just checked into, and there's new news now.
01:00:57.000 Remember, Biden said, we got everyone out that wanted to get out.
01:01:00.000 So if you hear of an American there, he asked to stay there.
01:01:04.000 Not possible.
01:01:05.000 Not one person wants to be in Kabul in Afghanistan.
01:01:08.000 Not even the Taliban.
01:01:10.000 You know, they say about the radical Islamicists, they'll vote for the Taliban and then move to a Western country.
01:01:17.000 They want the culture of radical Islam to thrive, but personally, they want the sweet comforts of the West.
01:01:26.000 So no one wants to be there.
01:01:27.000 Why'd you take your fucking kids there?
01:01:29.000 Go to 3-0?
01:01:31.000 I'm getting mad just talking about this.
01:01:35.000 So they got three of the families.
01:01:37.000 So what was it?
01:01:38.000 Five families went there?
01:01:40.000 Or eight families?
01:01:42.000 You had planned an eight-family trip to a war-torn hellhole that you were lucky enough to get out of.
01:01:49.000 And I assume they have refugee status.
01:01:51.000 And how do you become a refugee?
01:01:52.000 You say, if I go home, I'll be killed.
01:01:54.000 And then they get the status, they get the citizenship, and then they go home for a visit.
01:01:59.000 I want to check it out.
01:02:01.000 I want to say hi.
01:02:02.000 I want to bring my granny a Sony PlayStation.
01:02:07.000 What?
01:02:10.000 Like, where's the anger?
01:02:12.000 The only person I've seen get angry about this is the lovely Isabella Riley.
01:02:18.000 And I asked you earlier to find her, call her.
01:02:23.000 We could speak her phone, but that's not very classy.
01:02:25.000 Get her on Skype.
01:02:26.000 We can get her on Skype in a matter of three, two, one.
01:02:35.000 Isabella, are you there?
01:02:36.000 Yes, I am.
01:02:38.000 Do people ever call you Isabelle?
01:02:39.000 Does that bother you?
01:02:41.000 Everyone has called me Isabelle.
01:02:42.000 It doesn't bother me, but I did used to get annoyed when I was in elementary school, and the teacher, the first day, would read off everyone's names, and she would say, or mostly a girl, Isabelle Riley.
01:02:51.000 And I'm like, well, when you're reading my friend Emma's name, are you just like, M?
01:02:55.000 No, but for some reason, people just don't get Isabella correct, but I don't care.
01:02:59.000 People can call me Trash.
01:03:00.000 I don't care.
01:03:01.000 Okay, Trash.
01:03:02.000 Thanks for coming on the show.
01:03:03.000 I was so glad to see you freak out about those students going to Afghanistan.
01:03:09.000 I mean, it just seems absolutely ridiculous, right?
01:03:13.000 I hate this whole attitude of we're all the same and all cultures are the same.
01:03:17.000 No, Afghanistan is a shithole and no children should ever go there even to visit their grandma and grandpa.
01:03:25.000 Sorry.
01:03:26.000 Bye.
01:03:26.000 Yeah.
01:03:27.000 Right.
01:03:27.000 Yeah.
01:03:27.000 People kept saying, well, they were visiting family.
01:03:29.000 And I'm like, okay, that's still irresponsible.
01:03:31.000 This child abuse.
01:03:32.000 Now these kids are probably going to get beheaded and raped or God knows what because their irresponsible parents took them there.
01:03:38.000 And I even had a tweet that extended it to, you know, don't take your children to the Middle East.
01:03:42.000 And I had people that were like, well, I have family in Israel and I've gone to Israel.
01:03:46.000 I'm like, yeah, I have family in Israel too.
01:03:48.000 I've never gone to Israel.
01:03:49.000 I have no interest in going to Israel or even out of the country.
01:03:52.000 Israel is not that dangerous, but you're right.
01:03:54.000 There are places like Starat that have regular rocket attacks.
01:03:58.000 But Afghanistan has never been safe for one hour ever in history for thousands of years.
01:04:04.000 It's like there was a Canadian blogger who, journalist, who said, Somalia is getting such a bad reputation.
01:04:11.000 I want to go there and just sort of vlog it and show you how fun it can be.
01:04:15.000 And she's at a cafe in Mogadishu.
01:04:17.000 She got murdered and raped to death.
01:04:19.000 Sorry, it is a shithole.
01:04:21.000 And what drove me nuts is you're the only one I saw saying that.
01:04:25.000 All the newspapers were like, doo-do-do-do-do.
01:04:26.000 Some California families went over to Afghanistan.
01:04:29.000 La la la.
01:04:30.000 They're stuck there.
01:04:31.000 What?
01:04:32.000 Yeah.
01:04:32.000 I mean, the second I saw that, I was like, what do you mean that there's a bunch of Californians with parents and their students over in Afghanistan?
01:04:39.000 Why are they there?
01:04:40.000 I mean, it makes no sense to me.
01:04:42.000 And I honestly think it's child abuse for a parent to bring a children to Afghanistan because it's not their choice to be there.
01:04:47.000 Obviously, the parents, maybe they deserve to die because it's natural selection.
01:04:51.000 You were kind of stupid for going there in the first place, but the four children have no control over their situation.
01:04:56.000 And God knows what's going to happen to them now.
01:04:58.000 Well, I just read like Two hours ago, that three of the families made it back, but two are stuck there.
01:05:06.000 And they're in hell.
01:05:07.000 What could be worse than Kabul right now?
01:05:09.000 It's the worst place in the world.
01:05:12.000 I don't know.
01:05:13.000 I keep saying that whenever anything annoying has happened to me or anyone this past week, I'm like, well, you know, at least we're not in Kabul or Afghanistan.
01:05:19.000 You know, things could be worse.
01:05:20.000 At least I'm not a woman in Afghanistan right now.
01:05:23.000 There has to be more stigma.
01:05:24.000 We have to mock these people, ridicule them, insult them.
01:05:28.000 Like, there's been no blowback against these parents who came up with this ridiculous idea, but there should be.
01:05:34.000 There should be some outrage.
01:05:36.000 No, I completely agree.
01:05:37.000 It's all part of the war on kids.
01:05:39.000 All right.
01:05:39.000 Trash, thanks for coming on the show.
01:05:42.000 Thanks for having me.
01:05:48.000 Isn't this a fun show?
01:05:50.000 A lot of variety.
01:05:51.000 We've had three guests.
01:05:54.000 Dharman is maybe...
01:05:55.000 That's low-hanging fruit, but low-hanging fruit is yummy.
01:05:59.000 Low-hanging retard.
01:06:01.000 Low-hanging fruit is ripe and delicious.
01:06:03.000 That's why people grab it.
01:06:08.000 Speaking of Afghanistan, we've just discovered that Biden was offered Kabul.
01:06:15.000 The Taliban said, Washington reports the Taliban offered to stay out of Kabul and let U.S. forces secure the city.
01:06:23.000 We told them we only needed the airport.
01:06:25.000 We could have controlled the airport and Kabul and evacuated everyone, but chose not to.
01:06:30.000 The incompetence is stunning.
01:06:33.000 So the Taliban said, look, here's how it's going to go.
01:06:35.000 You either, the airport has to be controlled and Kabul, the town has to be controlled.
01:06:41.000 So you can control both.
01:06:42.000 And Biden's administration went, again, DMV.
01:06:46.000 Biden's administration went, no, just the airport's fine.
01:06:51.000 What?
01:06:53.000 What?
01:06:55.000 That's like Israel saying, really, we just need Jerusalem and Tel Aviv.
01:07:00.000 We can have Palestinians everywhere else roaming around with rockets in their pants.
01:07:06.000 What's that?
01:07:06.000 Say that again?
01:07:09.000 And I thought this was funny.
01:07:11.000 Speaking, like, the apologists of the left are all over the Taliban defending them.
01:07:18.000 I don't, you might, you're going to have to explain that to me, by the way.
01:07:21.000 I think it's because we're Trumpers and they hate whatever we like, right?
01:07:27.000 Because they used to say, okay, you guys are all racist.
01:07:30.000 I'm on the anti-hate group.
01:07:33.000 I work for right-wing watch or whatever.
01:07:35.000 So I'm going to monitor racism.
01:07:37.000 Now, when you look at their Twitter feeds, it's all about COVID and anti-vaxxers.
01:07:43.000 And, okay, so now your two areas of interest are racism and pandemics.
01:07:50.000 Bullshit.
01:07:51.000 They just hate the right.
01:07:53.000 And if we were all into dogs and we were posting puppy pics, they would talk about killing our dogs.
01:07:59.000 They want us dead.
01:08:02.000 Like, look at this.
01:08:04.000 Go to 3.9.
01:08:09.000 So we didn't vote for Biden.
01:08:13.000 Biden's in bed with the Taliban.
01:08:14.000 So the Taliban is good.
01:08:16.000 And we're wrong for hating the situation in Kabul.
01:08:23.000 And we tend not to be vaxed.
01:08:25.000 Should, again with the Amy Siskin, I'm not going on her feed.
01:08:28.000 These are other people posting her.
01:08:30.000 She is the celebrity retard for the left.
01:08:33.000 Should unvaccinated people who are eligible for COVID vaccines be denied hospital care in areas with capacity issues and have to pay for it?
01:08:41.000 And then what does this next woman say?
01:08:46.000 They should be denied.
01:08:47.000 Blue check mark.
01:08:48.000 She wants us to die.
01:08:49.000 But as Christians, they should be allowed to die in their church peacefully with sacred music playing in the background.
01:08:55.000 They can't respect science only when they are sick.
01:08:57.000 Unfair to those.
01:08:58.000 This is why we're having a divorce.
01:09:00.000 You know, like when you watch these crime shows and you go, wow, the wife wanted to kill him?
01:09:05.000 She couldn't just get a divorce?
01:09:07.000 Well, then he was right to leave her.
01:09:09.000 Like, we're not getting divorced because we hate them.
01:09:12.000 We're getting divorced because they want us dead and we don't want to die.
01:09:15.000 And the big challenge now is making sure we get the kids because the kids are not safe with them.
01:09:21.000 In fact, they find the notion of protection offensive.
01:09:27.000 Okay, so go back to 3-2.
01:09:32.000 They're hanging people from helicopters.
01:09:34.000 You can see it in the video.
01:09:36.000 The Taliban are hanging a person, presumably an American interpreter.
01:09:40.000 So he makes it clear he's presuming that, from a Black Hawk helicopter.
01:09:44.000 You cannot reason with terrorists.
01:09:46.000 And this is what they do.
01:09:47.000 Anyone who's ever paid attention to radical Islam knows stories like in Saudi Arabia, the UN built them a soccer field, and they were hanging women from the goalposts.
01:09:58.000 And they said, hey, we built you a soccer field so you play soccer.
01:10:01.000 And they go, well, then build us a place to hang women and we'll hang them there.
01:10:05.000 You didn't build us any place to hang anyone.
01:10:08.000 We're left with no choice.
01:10:09.000 That's the culture over there.
01:10:12.000 So what does the left do?
01:10:14.000 They start defending that and say he's just going for a ride.
01:10:19.000 This guy, David Gilbert, he's a weird little Irish liberal midget leprechaun.
01:10:26.000 And he says, no.
01:10:27.000 See, this is Chris Cuomo sends this article to Ian Chong to say, no, no, no.
01:10:33.000 See, it's been fact-checked.
01:10:35.000 There's no facts in this.
01:10:38.000 In fact, David Gilbert claims that when you, at one point, you can see him reach up and hold the rope.
01:10:44.000 That doesn't mean he's not being hanged.
01:10:46.000 Remember, things are hung.
01:10:47.000 A person is hanged.
01:10:48.000 And also, I don't think it's his hand.
01:10:50.000 I've watched the video a few times.
01:10:51.000 I think it's his shoulder.
01:10:52.000 It just looks like an arm.
01:10:53.000 The person even reaches up and holds onto the rope.
01:10:57.000 That's not true.
01:10:58.000 And that doesn't mean someone is not being hanged.
01:11:02.000 That's all the evidence they provide.
01:11:09.000 What do you mean let the person hold onto the rope?
01:11:12.000 They're probably not the best at hanging people or doing anything.
01:11:15.000 Yeah, they obviously nothing in the world.
01:11:17.000 They clearly don't care about this person.
01:11:19.000 Okay, lefties, you tell me what it is.
01:11:21.000 Is it a fun ride?
01:11:22.000 Is that how you survey an area?
01:11:24.000 How does the helicopter land?
01:11:29.000 What's 3-3?
01:11:33.000 That's their evidence.
01:11:37.000 Vice fact-jacked the video I shared in Call Me and Torres Right Wing Troll, same publications that ran a story calling U.S. Marines Nazis on the same day 13 service members were killed.
01:11:48.000 And that guy, Ben McCuck is his fucking name, he went to court because he's a Canadian nerd, also a midget, by the way.
01:11:58.000 Everyone's a midget in these stories.
01:12:01.000 The RCMP, Canada's FBI, demanded that he gave them information he got from these terrorists and say who they are.
01:12:09.000 These are terrorists that want to kill people in Canada.
01:12:12.000 And he was like, no, I'm not giving it to you.
01:12:13.000 It's part of my journalistic ethics.
01:12:17.000 So he's all about ethics when it comes to holding water for terrorists.
01:12:21.000 And that seems to be, maybe that's Sarouche Alvi's influence.
01:12:24.000 He does wear a gold ring that says jihad.
01:12:28.000 But that's the guy who called Marines racist the day 13 were killed.
01:12:34.000 And then the other midge, David Gilbert, they just say it's a baseless claim.
01:12:42.000 Like they're holding water for terrorists.
01:12:44.000 And the enemy of my enemy is my friend.
01:12:45.000 That's how they think.
01:12:46.000 So the reason they're defending terrorists is because they know that the worse terrorists are, the better we look and the worse Biden looks.
01:12:54.000 So let's make them nice.
01:12:56.000 Like at The Guardian 3-4, they want you to know that the Taliban is becoming more worldly.
01:13:04.000 Decades apart made the militant group's leaders more worldly, but they may struggle to control their foot soldiers.
01:13:10.000 Oh, so it's a few bad eggs.
01:13:13.000 Remember there was that terrorist who died and they called him a sophisticated scholar or something?
01:13:18.000 Stoic, yeah.
01:13:19.000 Stoic warrior?
01:13:21.000 And then 3-5, they're our brothers.
01:13:26.000 Austere.
01:13:26.000 Sorry, it was austere.
01:13:27.000 Austere.
01:13:28.000 Yeah, that was it.
01:13:29.000 The Taliban is our brothers.
01:13:36.000 I can't hear her.
01:13:39.000 There's footage playing.
01:13:40.000 Here we go.
01:13:41.000 I want to take this opportunity to speak to our brothers, the Taliban.
01:13:49.000 We call on you to ensure the safe and secure passage of any individual.
01:13:55.000 Shut the fuck up, bitch.
01:13:56.000 Who is she?
01:13:58.000 Maryam Monchosi.
01:14:00.000 I don't want the kids to go to the left in the American divorce.
01:14:06.000 She's an Afghan-Canadian politician.
01:14:10.000 A politician.
01:14:13.000 That's just like.
01:14:14.000 These are the people controlling the government.
01:14:16.000 These are the people that are our bosses.
01:14:21.000 They don't work for us.
01:14:22.000 We work for them.
01:14:23.000 Look at it.
01:14:23.000 Go to 4.9, speaking of politicians.
01:14:30.000 Squad member Rashida Talib is blasted of her tribute to Palestinian PhD student who died after ramming her car at Israeli checkpoint, then running at soldiers with a knife.
01:14:39.000 So her beef is that the family doesn't have the body.
01:14:44.000 In other words, the Israeli police, the Israeli government are not nice with terrorist bodies.
01:14:53.000 They're too mean.
01:14:56.000 This girl, scroll down.
01:14:58.000 This girl drove at them.
01:15:00.000 And Rashida doesn't mention that.
01:15:02.000 She just says, what?
01:15:05.000 Who's fighting Babel to bury her daughter and begin healing?
01:15:07.000 My was a mother, a loving daughter, successful PhD student.
01:15:11.000 Sounds like a noble warrior.
01:15:12.000 Sounds very austere.
01:15:13.000 Sounds like our brothers.
01:15:14.000 Sounds very worldly.
01:15:16.000 Keep going up.
01:15:17.000 No, no, back to where you were.
01:15:20.000 Yeah.
01:15:20.000 I'm sharing my story because I began to only learn last year of this inhumane practice by these.
01:15:26.000 She was trying to kill Israelis.
01:15:29.000 She's a murderous terrorist.
01:15:31.000 And they're talking about how they dehumanize them.
01:15:35.000 I think it's pretty dehumanizing to try to kill someone.
01:15:37.000 That's what animals do.
01:15:39.000 Look at that sweet soul.
01:15:45.000 Fucking sadistic.
01:15:48.000 And I don't want them to be near our kids.
01:15:51.000 Speaking of which, where am I now?
01:15:58.000 Go to 4-6.
01:16:03.000 You may have seen this viral video going around.
01:16:06.000 These are the people who are talking to our kids every day, telling them what to think.
01:16:11.000 Okay, so during third period, we have announcements and they do the Pledge of Allegiance.
01:16:15.000 I always tell my class, stand if you feel like it, don't stand if you feel like it.
01:16:20.000 Say the words if you want.
01:16:22.000 Don't have to say the words.
01:16:23.000 So my class decided to stand, but not say the words.
01:16:26.000 Totally fine.
01:16:27.000 Except for the fact that my room doesn't used to be tickets during COVID because it made me cook.
01:16:38.000 And I packed it away and I don't know where.
01:16:41.000 And I haven't found it yet.
01:16:44.000 My kid today gets, it's kind of weird that we just saved it and then, you know, we saved it to nothing.
01:16:50.000 And then I'm like, oh, well, you know, I gotta find it.
01:16:52.000 Like, I'm working on it.
01:16:53.000 I got you.
01:16:58.000 In the meantime, I tell this kid, we do have a flag in the class that you can pledge your allegiance to.
01:17:05.000 And he, like, looks around and he goes, oh, that one?
01:17:11.000 Okay, so during third period, we have announcements.
01:17:13.000 Are you as nauseated as I am?
01:17:14.000 I feel like I just ate rotten milk.
01:17:17.000 This sounds very gay.
01:17:18.000 I think she's getting fired, actually, which is rare that they get fired.
01:17:23.000 Did you notice, though, she said, my kid?
01:17:25.000 Yeah, this is a weird thing that's going on with these females.
01:17:29.000 The other weird lesbians we had last week, they call them my kiddos.
01:17:33.000 The one that's like this, like, I messed up, guys.
01:17:39.000 So gross.
01:17:40.000 It's disturbing.
01:17:41.000 Teachers used to have like a way about them.
01:17:43.000 Well, it's like when that one said, I don't teach the curriculum.
01:17:46.000 I teach them about Black Lives Matter, my kindergarten.
01:17:48.000 And then there was that other teacher that said, let's be honest.
01:17:51.000 Parents don't always know what's best for their children.
01:17:54.000 We know what's best for these children.
01:17:56.000 In other words, I'm the parent, not you.
01:18:00.000 I told you these guys were bad news.
01:18:02.000 I feel like teachers revere their students more so than the other way around.
01:18:06.000 And it used to be the other way around.
01:18:07.000 Like they had dignity and authority, right?
01:18:10.000 And now they're just like, I got you.
01:18:12.000 You want to play the business?
01:18:13.000 Yeah, they want to be their cool pals.
01:18:16.000 Don't guys have to be cool pals if they're going to brainwash them.
01:18:24.000 Look at this guy 4-7.
01:18:28.000 This guy should be fired.
01:18:29.000 And just look at the vanity.
01:18:31.000 I'm about to come out to all of my students.
01:18:35.000 Shut up.
01:18:37.000 I'm about to come out to all my students.
01:18:42.000 So I have a quick announcement for everybody.
01:18:44.000 Can everybody look up from their phones?
01:18:46.000 My class is important, please.
01:18:48.000 Hello.
01:18:48.000 I'm waiting.
01:18:49.000 You guys look at me.
01:18:51.000 Oh, my God.
01:18:52.000 Look at my Zoa.
01:18:54.000 I usually go by Mr. Johnson, but I would like to be called Zoa now.
01:18:58.000 My name is Zoa, and I'm non-binary.
01:19:01.000 So you can call me Mr. Zoa.
01:19:03.000 You can call me Miss Zoa.
01:19:05.000 You can call me Miss Zoa.
01:19:06.000 That's MX period.
01:19:08.000 And I go by all pronouns.
01:19:10.000 That's it.
01:19:12.000 Thank you.
01:19:16.000 Yeah, we knew, dude.
01:19:18.000 Thanks, guys.
01:19:19.000 That's it.
01:19:19.000 Proud of you.
01:19:20.000 Oh, thank you.
01:19:23.000 If anybody has any questions, you can ask me at the end of class.
01:19:25.000 We don't.
01:19:26.000 I'm proud of you.
01:19:27.000 Very proud.
01:19:27.000 And then they do that squeal.
01:19:28.000 Remember that other woman who was also fired?
01:19:31.000 It's good that we expose these people when they expose themselves because the word gets out.
01:19:35.000 Remember, she went squeeze.
01:19:37.000 Yeah, what is that?
01:19:38.000 We have radical lunatics with our children.
01:19:41.000 Actually, I just sent you a video, another Project Very Test.
01:19:45.000 James is just, he's doing the heavy lifting here.
01:19:49.000 This one, you got to see.
01:19:50.000 Make that full screen.
01:19:50.000 You may have to kill me.
01:19:54.000 And this, look, look, stop, stop, stop.
01:19:56.000 I have 100 and this is very crucial, and it's very quickly at the very beginning.
01:20:00.000 I have 180 days.
01:20:02.000 By the way, nice year of work you do, teachers, 180 out of 365.
01:20:07.000 I have 180 days to turn the students into revolutionaries.
01:20:12.000 He's Antifa.
01:20:14.000 Look at his shirt.
01:20:15.000 Anti-fascista.
01:20:18.000 Turn him into revolutionaries.
01:20:19.000 How do you do that?
01:20:20.000 How do you scare the buck out of them?
01:20:23.000 Sacramento organization that is under the banner of Antifa is very loosely organized, right?
01:20:29.000 So that, yeah, when there is like right-wing rallies and stuff, then it'll be like...
01:20:34.000 We'll create an opposition.
01:20:36.000 Where would you go to connect to some of these organizations?
01:20:40.000 I post a calendar.
01:20:42.000 And I do it for extra credit.
01:20:44.000 So they get points for doing it.
01:20:45.000 So that encourages them to do it.
01:20:47.000 And I've got like students protests, tabling, food distribution.
01:20:55.000 When they go, they take pictures, they write up a reflection.
01:20:57.000 That's it.
01:20:59.000 I happen to be thinking about that.
01:21:06.000 This is meant to make fashion comfortable.
01:21:09.000 I don't really know what you're doing.
01:21:11.000 Maybe you shouldn't be aligning with the value.
01:21:14.000 This is apathetic.
01:21:16.000 The cultural revolution in the 60s was fixing the problem that came about after the epidemic.
01:21:24.000 It ultimately failed.
01:21:26.000 I mean, there was a lot of excesses.
01:21:28.000 People were definitely like, you know, shot in the streets that probably shouldn't have been.
01:21:32.000 Incredibly ugly behavior come out of this city.
01:21:36.000 And you can see a couple of people over there that might be demonstrating that.
01:21:39.000 I have 180 days turned you into revolutionaries.
01:21:42.000 How do you do that?
01:21:42.000 How do you?
01:21:48.000 Be brave.
01:21:49.000 Never stop fighting.
01:21:51.000 Oh my god.
01:21:57.000 Like, we got to bring bullying back.
01:21:59.000 We have to bring stigma back.
01:22:00.000 We have to be uncomfortable.
01:22:02.000 We're so scared of offending everyone that we allow for shit like that because we don't want to rock the boat.
01:22:08.000 We hear that eight families went to Afghanistan and we go, okay, well, they're refugees.
01:22:13.000 They're Afghani.
01:22:15.000 I'm not going to say anything.
01:22:18.000 I don't want to be rude.
01:22:19.000 I don't want to be offensive.
01:22:22.000 This is the death of fighting, the death of confrontation.
01:22:24.000 We're so scared of offending people.
01:22:26.000 Anyway, let's lighten up the show.
01:22:28.000 We're getting a little depressing here.
01:22:31.000 And I hope you don't get depressed.
01:22:32.000 I hope you just feel like fighting.
01:22:34.000 And you want to find out if you have teachers at your kids' school that are like that.
01:22:38.000 And snuff it out.
01:22:39.000 I don't mean kill them.
01:22:41.000 I mean expose them.
01:22:42.000 Let's go to the mailbag.
01:22:43.000 I'm beyond angry.
01:22:46.000 I am beyond angry.
01:22:53.000 I don't see anything.
01:22:54.000 Oops.
01:22:57.000 We're waiting.
01:22:59.000 Dang.
01:22:59.000 Very unprofessional.
01:23:00.000 Got me spun.
01:23:03.000 What's going on?
01:23:19.000 Dear Canada Man and Alpaca Hare, the Jake Paul fight stream was extremely tough to watch.
01:23:24.000 I don't want to disparage war vets or sponsors of the show, but Tim couldn't have possibly been more fucking annoying.
01:23:31.000 The fights were embarrassing enough, so to add Tim's retarded interjections was just simply cruel punishment.
01:23:37.000 Anyways, it was interesting to hear you guys talk about the Canadian HA charters.
01:23:42.000 I live just outside Vancouver, and their presence is definitely known out there.
01:23:48.000 What are Canadian HA charters?
01:23:51.000 Prowboys?
01:23:53.000 What does he mean?
01:23:58.000 Living near the ports has one catching wind of some pretty gnarly stories.
01:24:04.000 I never get debilitating hangovers, blah, blah, blah.
01:24:08.000 What age do you start getting bad hangovers?
01:24:14.000 They really start around 30.
01:24:16.000 They get bad 35, and then every five years they get more and more brutal.
01:24:20.000 Like, I only had maybe three bourbons last night, and I was dry heaving at the gym this morning and in the bathroom defecating many, many times.
01:24:28.000 But that's 51.
01:24:30.000 Did I tell you I was at the American Legion?
01:24:33.000 And I'm talking to the bartender there, and he goes, Oh, I quit drinking.
01:24:36.000 I got the hangovers.
01:24:37.000 They were just too bad.
01:24:38.000 I couldn't take it anymore.
01:24:40.000 It was like I'd have a bit of pleasure at night, and then I'd have 10 times the pain.
01:24:44.000 So if I had a buzz for one hour at night, I'd have 10 hours of pain the next day.
01:24:48.000 And I go, When was that?
01:24:49.000 He's like, Oh, it was like 10 years ago.
01:24:52.000 And how old were you then?
01:24:53.000 That's 65.
01:24:55.000 He quit drinking at 65.
01:24:58.000 So we got some time.
01:25:00.000 Oh, another thing I meant to mention, we were talking about this yesterday.
01:25:03.000 You know what's so weird about, I've never hung out in the Bronx as much as we have since getting the studio.
01:25:08.000 It's Detroit.
01:25:10.000 I love it.
01:25:10.000 It sucks.
01:25:11.000 It's dangerous.
01:25:12.000 It's loud.
01:25:12.000 You don't want to be here at night.
01:25:14.000 After the live shows, we run to our cars.
01:25:17.000 But there's no rules.
01:25:20.000 Like if you, in anywhere in New York city or in the suburbs, if you walk in some bodega or liquor store with your dog, they go, you can't have your dog in here.
01:25:30.000 But no one cares.
01:25:31.000 Nope.
01:25:32.000 And what were you saying about the gym?
01:25:35.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:25:36.000 So sometimes, you know, I don't have a Planet Fitness thing anymore.
01:25:39.000 I have like a smaller gym.
01:25:40.000 They don't let you go to different gyms.
01:25:42.000 But Planet Fitness, they're all over the place.
01:25:44.000 So I have a card if it goes this far, but I could just walk into any Planet Fitness and not be accosted or anything.
01:25:52.000 First, I just go to the bathroom and then I'll go upstairs.
01:25:54.000 One time I was like, do you have a water bottle back there?
01:25:56.000 I left my water bottle.
01:25:57.000 And then they're like, no.
01:25:58.000 And I was like, I'm just going to go upstairs and check.
01:26:00.000 They're like, yeah, we don't care.
01:26:01.000 They don't.
01:26:02.000 We don't care.
01:26:03.000 You don't even have to do all that.
01:26:04.000 No.
01:26:04.000 I went to Bounce You, like one of these bouncy places.
01:26:07.000 And I had to, it was a struggle to pay.
01:26:10.000 Like, it would have been so.
01:26:11.000 And there's all these signs, like, you can't come up here without the special socks and you can't wear shoes and obviously no food or drink.
01:26:18.000 I just walk in with a hot dog and a beer in my shoes.
01:26:23.000 And the guy just looks at me and looks away.
01:26:25.000 Like he, I could have walked in with a gun.
01:26:26.000 I could have had cleats on and jumped on their trampolines.
01:26:29.000 Yeah, like, if you do a dine and dash in the Bronx, no one's going to chase you.
01:26:33.000 No.
01:26:33.000 There's no rules to do.
01:26:35.000 Dine and stroll.
01:26:36.000 And saunter away.
01:26:38.000 A dine and saunter.
01:26:39.000 It's been abandoned.
01:26:41.000 I love it, but that's because I think with a Puerto Rican, you can kind of, it's just, you can get away with a lot more.
01:26:48.000 This is where I'm going to be.
01:26:49.000 No one knows you're Puerto Rican, dude.
01:26:51.000 What are you talking about?
01:26:52.000 Like when they look at your face?
01:26:55.000 No.
01:26:56.000 What do people think when they look at your face?
01:26:58.000 I don't fucking know.
01:26:59.000 That they're in the Star Wars bar?
01:27:03.000 Like, shouldn't you be playing a flute?
01:27:05.000 Oh, dude.
01:27:07.000 I have to stop laughing before I forget.
01:27:10.000 Though it was a bit of a train wreck yesterday's show, I think the Dan Harmon sex doll stuff, I woke up laughing about that.
01:27:19.000 You couldn't stop talking about Dan Harmon's fuck doll.
01:27:22.000 So let's make that a clip of the day.
01:27:24.000 All right, that's a good idea.
01:27:27.000 Because I brought it up at the bar the other day, and we all, these are three different people who don't watch the show, we all got back into it.
01:27:36.000 Because you know he talks to her.
01:27:38.000 People talk to their dogs.
01:27:41.000 Tom Cruise, what's his name?
01:27:43.000 Tom Hanks spoke to a volleyball.
01:27:45.000 You're going to start saying shit.
01:27:47.000 Little quips.
01:27:47.000 See, I'm getting sucked back into it now.
01:27:49.000 Like little jokes.
01:27:51.000 So like, yeah.
01:27:52.000 Well, you shower and I'll show her while he watches TV.
01:27:55.000 And then there's times when he's wasted.
01:27:57.000 And this is what I realized yesterday.
01:27:59.000 I bet you he got super wasted and he was furious about something.
01:28:03.000 And he put her in the headlock.
01:28:06.000 And he was squeezing and squeezing.
01:28:07.000 And he's like, you see how it feels?
01:28:09.000 You can't breathe.
01:28:11.000 And then he dropped her and she, of course, just plops down.
01:28:14.000 And then he slumps over her and just starts crying, sobbing, because he hurt her.
01:28:23.000 Oh, my God.
01:28:24.000 If he's smoking weed, he probably gives her a puff.
01:28:27.000 Yeah, and it's just like, the smoke is just drifting on her face.
01:28:31.000 And he's like, pretty good shit, right?
01:28:33.000 See, it's hard to imagine a man doing that, but I could picture if he's with her, just like kind of just sitting there watching TV and he's like his arms around her.
01:28:41.000 A phone call.
01:28:43.000 Yeah.
01:28:46.000 Can't you see him on the phone?
01:28:48.000 I gotta go.
01:28:50.000 She's getting mad.
01:28:51.000 Who?
01:28:52.000 You know.
01:28:53.000 This thing.
01:28:55.000 This really good sculpture of a human head.
01:29:02.000 That's the funniest.
01:29:03.000 I saw a documentary about it.
01:29:05.000 Some black dude had one, and his dad really didn't like it.
01:29:09.000 A, why do you live at home?
01:29:10.000 B, why is a dad tolerating his son's sex doll?
01:29:18.000 Okay, world's worst spaghetti.
01:29:20.000 I can't imagine how bad it tastes to get this reaction.
01:29:22.000 Old Vid, maybe you've seen it.
01:29:24.000 Interesting how hard she tries to spare her mother's feelings.
01:29:28.000 It looks like you're enjoying yourself.
01:29:30.000 Oh, yep, that looks like you're enjoying.
01:29:34.000 Okay, you okay?
01:29:41.000 I'm okay.
01:29:42.000 Okay.
01:29:47.000 He did not like the spaghetti.
01:29:49.000 This is definitely my favorite slingshot ride video.
01:29:51.000 Check it out.
01:29:53.000 Okay.
01:29:59.000 Okay.
01:30:01.000 What's going on?
01:30:03.000 What's going on with blacks faint more than whites, I've noticed.
01:30:12.000 Oh my god.
01:30:35.000 Such a good dad when they go.
01:30:37.000 The seatbelts are loose.
01:30:40.000 Yo, we're gonna lose mama.
01:30:43.000 Oh yeah.
01:30:44.000 I mean they're gonna put me up to the chunk.
01:30:47.000 So do you want to buy the video?
01:30:50.000 No.
01:30:51.000 Yeah, mama.
01:30:58.000 Get a throat.
01:31:01.000 Oh shit.
01:31:01.000 Okay, that's a good one.
01:31:03.000 Wow, this is a real palate cleansing mailbag section.
01:31:10.000 I'm not going to click on things that I don't.
01:31:12.000 I haven't checked yet.
01:31:14.000 Hey, Gavin, Ryan, you showed me this kid.
01:31:16.000 No, I'm not playing that one.
01:31:19.000 This is too long.
01:31:22.000 Hey, Gavin, I live in the red part of Florida.
01:31:23.000 I'm very happy with our governor, Ron DeSantis.
01:31:25.000 I would love for him to run for president.
01:31:27.000 What are your thoughts on this?
01:31:29.000 He's awesome.
01:31:31.000 He's the leader of the pack.
01:31:32.000 He's what everyone wants.
01:31:34.000 Do you not speak to people?
01:31:39.000 That's like, hey, I'm just getting into superheroes.
01:31:41.000 I'm a big fan of this superman.
01:31:43.000 He flies through the sky.
01:31:44.000 Have you familiar with him?
01:31:45.000 What are your thoughts?
01:31:47.000 I mean, look at him.
01:31:48.000 He's pimping.
01:31:50.000 Okay, here's finally.
01:31:55.000 Oh, wait, look at this one.
01:31:56.000 The boxing night.
01:31:58.000 Buya Niga.
01:32:00.000 Buya Niga.
01:32:02.000 Can you guys get shit faced like this more often, please?
01:32:04.000 This was beautiful.
01:32:05.000 This must be recorded on a golden disc and sent to outer space.
01:32:09.000 This and Charles Bukowski's book readings with a bottle of port.
01:32:13.000 I can't tell if that guy's being sarcastic or not, but thank you very much, sir.
01:32:17.000 I guess some people liked it.
01:32:19.000 All I'm going to say is in the grand scheme of things, it'll be nice when you look back and there's some variety.
01:32:25.000 Like that bit I did where I just stared at people who were staring.
01:32:30.000 In the moment, you're like, this is stupid.
01:32:33.000 But when you look back, you go, remember that one green screen he did where he didn't do anything?
01:32:38.000 Variety.
01:32:39.000 Keep you guessing.
01:32:45.000 No, no, no.
01:32:49.000 Okay, this one is really stupid.
01:32:53.000 It goes against the traditional rules for a quality would you rather, but I think I have a good one on deck.
01:32:58.000 Gavin, would you rather have X-ray vision that is strictly limited to viewing any woman that you want to see topless?
01:33:04.000 Or the ability to make Ryan punch himself in the nuts just by thinking it?
01:33:09.000 The X-ray vision can be used on an unlimited amount of women, in-person TV, the internet, no matter where you see them, for an unlimited amount of time.
01:33:17.000 Topless will be defined as no shirt, no bra.
01:33:19.000 The sack punching power can only be used on Ryan, but other than that, there are no limits.
01:33:24.000 You could even make him do it when you're drunk at 3 a.m. in Costa Rica and he's in the FZ thousands of miles away.
01:33:31.000 Choose wisely.
01:33:31.000 The world's watching.
01:33:33.000 You could just ask me to do it.
01:33:34.000 I'll just punch you in the nuts.
01:33:36.000 Yeah.
01:33:37.000 Just ask me nicely.
01:33:39.000 So do something that is as easy as going like that.
01:33:41.000 Punch yourself in the nuts.
01:33:43.000 That's the...
01:33:46.000 That was in the dick, you cheater.
01:33:48.000 Yeah, that's a real thing.
01:33:49.000 Punch yourself from down up.
01:33:51.000 Man.
01:33:51.000 No, my balls are...
01:33:53.000 Are what?
01:33:55.000 Punch yourself in the balls, dude.
01:33:56.000 Come on.
01:34:00.000 You're kidding me.
01:34:06.000 There we go.
01:34:08.000 See?
01:34:09.000 That was free.
01:34:10.000 Let's time how long you feel sick for, too.
01:34:14.000 It's not coming on yet.
01:34:15.000 It hasn't even started yet?
01:34:16.000 No, no, no.
01:34:17.000 That's a good sign.
01:34:18.000 That means it was a good punch.
01:34:20.000 I feel a little...
01:34:22.000 Feel a little nauseous?
01:34:24.000 Yeah, nauseous is a good word.
01:34:26.000 Like, there's pressure in there.
01:34:31.000 So, obviously, I would like to do the magic thing that involves having superpowers rather than punch a guy in the balls.
01:34:40.000 Yeah, that'll get old.
01:34:41.000 Yeah.
01:34:42.000 Eventually, I'll be numb.
01:34:43.000 This is the dumbest would you rather we've ever received.
01:34:47.000 Would you like to see infinite tits or have a magic power that is as easy as going like this?
01:34:52.000 That's like a, you can make a pencil float.
01:34:56.000 Let's just pick up a pencil.
01:34:57.000 That's more of a, what do you most, hate Ryan or love tits?
01:35:01.000 Love tits.
01:35:02.000 There we go.
01:35:03.000 Would be fascinating.
01:35:04.000 Plus, I'd be more intelligent in the tit realm.
01:35:08.000 Like, I'd say, I'd know things that you don't know.
01:35:11.000 I'd be like, you'd be surprised.
01:35:12.000 Tall girls usually have small tits and big nipples.
01:35:15.000 Like, I'd have the knowledge of Motley Crew or who's been laid the most in the world?
01:35:22.000 Gene Simmons?
01:35:24.000 I'd have Gene Simmons tit knowledge.
01:35:25.000 You know, you'd probably like discover something about nipples that women haven't discovered too unless they went to the doctor, like all of them.
01:35:31.000 And you're like, this thing called McInnes nipple.
01:35:34.000 It's McInnes syndrome where your nipples are this.
01:35:37.000 Yeah, that's it.
01:35:37.000 We should have him on the show.
01:35:39.000 And like maybe Irish women all have small nipples and Polynesian women all have giant Oreoles.
01:35:44.000 Right.
01:35:45.000 And as one doctor, I mean, you're not going to see that much diversity.
01:35:49.000 No.
01:35:50.000 No.
01:35:50.000 If you're a doctor and you're in the Bronx, you're going to be seeing just Puerto Rican and black nipples.
01:35:54.000 Correct.
01:35:55.000 If you're in Westchester, it's going to be all white nipples.
01:35:58.000 All right, let's get to the final video.
01:36:16.000 Speaking of women and their body parts, this is the weirdest, craziest ass I have ever seen in my life.
01:36:23.000 I assume it's fake.
01:36:25.000 But this is, sorry, 5'4.
01:36:29.000 What's happening here?
01:36:33.000 Ass.
01:36:33.000 Grind ass.
01:36:36.000 Help me out, bro.
01:36:38.000 Look at that.
01:36:40.000 Does a man want that?
01:36:41.000 No.
01:36:45.000 She's mentally ill.
01:36:47.000 And the doctor violated the Hippocratic oath by giving her that thing.
01:36:52.000 Like, you might as well just have a penis sticking out of your back.
01:36:58.000 Look at it.
01:37:02.000 I mean, she's a freak.
01:37:03.000 She could be in the circus as butt woman.
01:37:11.000 All right, that's the end of the show today.
01:37:14.000 This Wednesday, we will not have Compound censored because our man is down south.
01:37:20.000 So it'll just be a normal show.
01:37:21.000 Hopefully as fun as this particular episode.
01:37:24.000 All right, we jam-packed in lots of guests and a lot of variety, though.
01:37:29.000 I think that green screen was pretty weak.
01:37:32.000 And the theme of today's show is there's a war on kids.
01:37:36.000 America's getting divorced.
01:37:38.000 We are splitting up.
01:37:39.000 We have irreconcilable differences.
01:37:41.000 And there's no hope of us ever getting back together because they want us dead.
01:37:46.000 And I don't want to be with people who want us dead.
01:37:48.000 And the big question now is who gets the kids?
01:37:51.000 Because if the kids are in their care, the kids are going to get abused.
01:37:56.000 You get abused.
01:37:59.000 So don't get depressed by this.
01:38:01.000 Get ready.
01:38:02.000 We're going to fight to protect our children.
01:38:04.000 There's no way we're letting them get our kids.
01:38:06.000 So get fired.
01:38:07.000 Get in trouble.
01:38:08.000 Be brave.
01:38:09.000 And never stop fighting.
01:38:30.000 While I keep moving on, even when you don't give a fuck about you, don't wanna hear your song.
01:38:37.000 I think I'm going home and turning on my phone.
01:38:40.000 I wanna be alone.
01:38:42.000 I wanna be alone.
01:38:43.000 Like you're moving on.
01:38:45.000 Even when you don't give a fuck about you, don't wanna hear your song.
01:38:50.000 I think I'm going home and turning on my phone.
01:38:53.000 I wanna be alone.
01:38:54.000 I wanna be alone.
01:38:56.000 Like you're moving on.