Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 11, 2021


S04E40 - IS JAMES BOND DEAD?


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 2 minutes

Words per Minute

156.44456

Word Count

9,783

Sentence Count

1,107

Misogynist Sentences

79

Hate Speech Sentences

73


Summary

Kevin and Yusong discuss Peewee s Playhouse, the power of drugs, and the influence of Suicide on the music industry. Plus, a story about crackhead junkie Natasha Leone and the time she picked up a scab on her face in the mirror.


Transcript

00:00:13.000 Oh, live from New York.
00:00:16.000 It's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGinnis.
00:00:42.000 I'll make the shows shorter.
00:00:44.000 Shorter, sweeter, funner, hotter.
00:00:47.000 Two hours is too long.
00:00:48.000 That's like radio when you're driving.
00:00:50.000 This isn't radio.
00:00:51.000 This is video.
00:00:52.000 So we want you to stay excited.
00:00:55.000 And you can't stay excited for two hours a day.
00:00:56.000 That's ridiculous.
00:00:57.000 And I'm sitting here with like 60 articles to talk about.
00:01:01.000 What?
00:01:02.000 I just looked at the clock like the clock was going to be like, yeah, you're right.
00:01:06.000 It's about Peewee's Playhouse.
00:01:09.000 Hey, Clocky, can you believe that we have so much news?
00:01:14.000 Yeah.
00:01:15.000 Yes, Peru.
00:01:17.000 We should totally have talking pieces.
00:01:18.000 I was talking to my friend who has a show too, and I was like, I'm stealing that idea because he can't make it work.
00:01:23.000 He's like, he wants like talking, like the printer would just open up and be like, hi, Garvin.
00:01:27.000 We should totally steal that.
00:01:29.000 Yeah, yeah, we're stealing that.
00:01:30.000 But it's official.
00:01:32.000 That's awesome.
00:01:33.000 But don't you need a puppeteer?
00:01:35.000 Or you'll just do it in like a CGI?
00:01:37.000 I'll figure out some sort of wacky way.
00:01:39.000 Yeah.
00:01:42.000 Trust.
00:01:42.000 Maybe we could do it in advance.
00:01:45.000 Like, Clocky already has his answer ready.
00:01:48.000 So when I go, what do you think, Clocky?
00:01:49.000 And he's like, I don't think we can do it, boss.
00:01:51.000 Maybe.
00:01:52.000 I got a couple of different routes we can go.
00:01:54.000 Okay.
00:01:54.000 So that's lots of exciting changes in the first one minute of the show.
00:01:58.000 Wow.
00:02:00.000 That opening song was Baila Caning Camigo by Lust Era Puerto Rican dudes who were heavily inspired by Suicide.
00:02:13.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:02:13.000 I've seen them live.
00:02:14.000 Suicide.
00:02:15.000 Really?
00:02:16.000 I hear the influence, yeah.
00:02:17.000 Very much hear the influence.
00:02:19.000 Very much.
00:02:20.000 Very much.
00:02:20.000 Baila conigo means dance with me.
00:02:23.000 Uh-oh.
00:02:26.000 Suicide are the most underrated, overly influential band in the history of music.
00:02:35.000 No one knows who they are.
00:02:36.000 No one talks about them.
00:02:38.000 I saw records of them.
00:02:40.000 I think they started in 1971.
00:02:44.000 And I saw newspaper articles in New York City, like archived, calling them punk in 72.
00:02:55.000 What?
00:02:57.000 Turn it up.
00:02:57.000 This is Ghost Rider Ring?
00:03:14.000 Now, Bruce Springsteen just stole this for that song State Trooper on Nebraska, which is, I think, my favorite Bruce Springsteen album.
00:03:24.000 But I'm not sure if you'd call it an homage.
00:03:26.000 What's an homage?
00:03:28.000 And what's a blatant rip-off?
00:03:31.000 Like, play, go to the end of State Trooper.
00:03:35.000 1-3.
00:03:40.000 And you can show everyone the behind the scenes there.
00:03:42.000 They can see it all loading up.
00:03:46.000 This album is...
00:03:47.000 This one has, this is the one with Atlantic City on it.
00:03:50.000 Me made another Atlantic City.
00:04:00.000 Yeah, that's an homage.
00:04:01.000 Because there's no digital stuff.
00:04:02.000 It's just a guitar.
00:04:12.000 Go to the very end of the song.
00:04:14.000 I think it's 302.
00:04:24.000 Eric Conno.
00:04:29.000 You know who else was heavily influenced by suicide?
00:04:33.000 Totally forgotten band, Aerie Weapons.
00:04:38.000 I got a funny story I just remembered.
00:04:40.000 Natasha Leone was such a fucking crackhead junkie in the early aughts that she looked like a cool dude.
00:04:54.000 I mean, I think her body's, by the way, Natasha Leone's a friend of mine, wonderful human being, one of the funniest people I've ever met.
00:05:01.000 But back when she was addicted to drugs, I mean, wow.
00:05:06.000 She would just like sit there.
00:05:07.000 I think she was doing heroin and crack or whatever meth.
00:05:10.000 And she'd have these scabs on her face that she'd pick at in the mirror.
00:05:14.000 And then the blood would hit the sink and drip down and form these red lines all over the sink as she sat there picking her scabs for hours and hours and hours.
00:05:25.000 But my buddy Sharky once, he look up Aerie Weapons, the band.
00:05:30.000 So this guy is like, hey, you want to come do Coke with me?
00:05:37.000 And my buddy Dan, who was kind of nerdy, we called him Sharky, he picked his own nickname, which is annoying.
00:05:43.000 Because we'd be in South Brooklyn with like real zips, real fucking wise guys.
00:05:49.000 And they'd be like, what's your name?
00:05:50.000 I'm Shocky.
00:05:51.000 And they just assume, oh, you're a fucking wise guy.
00:05:55.000 You're a loan shark.
00:05:56.000 You're a huge deal.
00:05:57.000 So now we're with these heavy dudes.
00:05:59.000 And they're like, hey, Shocky.
00:06:01.000 I'm like, dude, your stupid nickname is going to get us killed.
00:06:04.000 But anyway, he goes, wow, I'm getting cool.
00:06:07.000 I'm hanging out with Aerie Weapons, the dude from Aerie Weapons, like the coolest band in New York.
00:06:12.000 They say they run New York.
00:06:14.000 They were kind of the head of the, that's not a very good picture of them, of the Electro Clash scene that got sabotaged by journalists.
00:06:25.000 One of them, the guy, Matt, there with the guitar, was living with Chloe Sevenye.
00:06:30.000 They were going to get married.
00:06:31.000 He cheated on her and blew that one.
00:06:35.000 so he goes, Wow, I'm cool.
00:06:36.000 Find more pictures, dude.
00:06:37.000 Is that all there is?
00:06:41.000 Find one where they look tough and cool.
00:06:43.000 There's Paul Seveny in the band.
00:06:47.000 No.
00:06:48.000 This one's pretty cool.
00:06:49.000 Wait, that's not them.
00:06:50.000 No.
00:06:51.000 They're not very Google-able.
00:06:54.000 Wait, there was an album cover there that looked kind of tough.
00:06:58.000 Okay, so anyway, there they go.
00:07:00.000 Right above me.
00:07:02.000 No, up.
00:07:03.000 No, up.
00:07:04.000 These two guys?
00:07:05.000 Yeah, that's them.
00:07:06.000 But anyway, so that's who Sharky thought he was hanging out with.
00:07:12.000 Sunglasses on, hood up, leather jacket, deep voice.
00:07:17.000 And she goes, let's go get some.
00:07:19.000 I ruined the story by saying she, and you know it's Natasha Leone.
00:07:23.000 She goes, let's go get some six pack before we go back to my place to do Coke.
00:07:27.000 And he's like, sure, no problem, dude.
00:07:29.000 And then they get to the bodega, and the East Indian gentleman at the front goes, I'm going to need to see ID because she's tiny.
00:07:37.000 And she gives it to me, and he goes, oh, my gosh.
00:07:40.000 And she goes, yeah, yeah, I know, Natasha Leone.
00:07:42.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:07:43.000 Let's just give me the fucking beer.
00:07:45.000 And he's like, I'm not hanging out with one of the coolest guys in New York.
00:07:49.000 I'm hanging out with Natasha Leone, who is so fucking high that I thought she was a cool dude.
00:08:00.000 Wow.
00:08:03.000 Happy Thanksgiving Day to my fellow Canucks out there.
00:08:06.000 This is their big day.
00:08:07.000 It's colder there.
00:08:08.000 They celebrate the harvest earlier.
00:08:09.000 So we do Thanksgiving now.
00:08:11.000 Oh yeah, this ARA weapons.
00:08:12.000 I forgot to play there.
00:08:26.000 I'm not away.
00:08:28.000 I heard that from you too long ago.
00:08:29.000 And you still hold.
00:08:32.000 And I hope you cool.
00:08:34.000 I'll find.
00:08:36.000 Fuck you, baby.
00:08:38.000 Give me my money.
00:08:41.000 Fuck you.
00:08:43.000 2004.
00:08:44.000 I remember the blackout.
00:08:47.000 It was one of the funnest nights of my life.
00:08:49.000 It's in my book, Death of Cool, which I don't see behind me.
00:08:54.000 Fantastic night.
00:08:55.000 Everyone was partying.
00:08:56.000 The bars were handing out free booze.
00:08:59.000 We were shrieking.
00:08:59.000 We were running around nude.
00:09:01.000 People were chanting, no more nude guys, no more nude guys at us.
00:09:08.000 And then the media was, NBC showed up and they go, what's going on here?
00:09:12.000 And I said, they said, what is this?
00:09:15.000 And I go, it's New York Muscle, baby.
00:09:17.000 New York Muscle, which is an airy weapon song.
00:09:20.000 And I was naive enough to think that that would catch on and it would be front page of the post, New York Muscle.
00:09:28.000 Didn't happen.
00:09:29.000 That's another great New York airy weapon song.
00:09:32.000 So yeah.
00:09:34.000 Not only is it Thanksgiving Day in Canada, but here in America, it's Indigenous Peoples Day, which I've noticed is this new thing, and I mentioned this on my Getter account.
00:09:46.000 Black and Indigenous people, that's just a thing now, black and indigenous.
00:09:49.000 It's almost one group.
00:09:52.000 Are there two groups that have less in common than Native Americans and Afro-Americans?
00:10:00.000 Have the two ever met each other?
00:10:03.000 Has a black person ever met an Indian ever once said how?
00:10:08.000 Yo, what's up?
00:10:09.000 Hello?
00:10:10.000 Hey.
00:10:11.000 Well, there's a lot of Native American rap, I guess.
00:10:13.000 But like the people who say indigenous, it's a very unique culture, Native American culture.
00:10:18.000 There's fry bread, there's the res, there's the jokes.
00:10:21.000 I mean, it's a, it's, I noticed when my mother-in-law, who's full ho-chunk, sends my daughter, who's half, my daughter, my wife, the text, sometimes the jokes, it's like they have a whole vernacular.
00:10:32.000 Like every time they do a joke, they end it with, I like, what did the Indian say to the North Owl when he said, you're two months early?
00:10:46.000 Aye!
00:10:49.000 You know, the only person I've ever seen capture Native American culture is Fred Armison.
00:10:56.000 He has this Indian comedian he does.
00:10:59.000 And I've spoken to Indians that go, that's spooky.
00:11:02.000 He must have spent some time on the res because this is too fucking good.
00:11:09.000 I guess you'll be pulling that up.
00:11:14.000 I'm already laughing.
00:11:14.000 I'm going to begin again with one of my favorite up-and-coming stand-up comedians.
00:11:18.000 He's a Native American from the Apocaly tribe.
00:11:20.000 Please welcome Billy Smith, ladies and gentlemen.
00:11:23.000 Billy Smith.
00:11:27.000 Thank you.
00:11:29.000 Well, let me hear you make some noise.
00:11:33.000 Oh, see, black and indigenous.
00:11:37.000 Boy, it sure is cold here in this island of square mountains and yellow horses.
00:11:45.000 It is so cold that I feel as if I have frozen off my Oakaca.
00:11:54.000 Doing the George Lopos thing too, where George Lopos will throw in some Mexican...
00:11:58.000 ceremonial rattle that makes the noise of rain.
00:12:03.000 Play on words.
00:12:05.000 This thing on.
00:12:08.000 Yeah, it is funny.
00:12:10.000 Anyway, my wife is a terrible cook.
00:12:12.000 Whenever she prepares a feast, I tell her I would sooner eat Istankayama Kosama!
00:12:20.000 I heard the black indigenous thing too.
00:12:22.000 Here's a perfect example of how it's used.
00:12:26.000 3.9, gifted programs are racist.
00:12:30.000 And I like how in her verbiage here, she assumes that everyone who's in a gifted program is white.
00:12:39.000 And she also assumes that not gifted people are black, Native American, and then like queer.
00:12:48.000 Like only straight white males are in gifted programs.
00:12:51.000 Sorry, they're called Asians.
00:12:53.000 And they are pretty much 90% of the gifted programs in New York City anyway.
00:12:57.000 If you'll notice the rallies, because de Blasio, He's almost done his term.
00:13:01.000 I think he's out in, what, November?
00:13:03.000 And his final thing to do before he peaces out is kill all the gifted programs.
00:13:08.000 Eric Holder, holding the DA under Obama, no, the Attorney General, he didn't like that blacks were appearing so much in the crime stats.
00:13:18.000 So he solved that problem by removing race from crime stats.
00:13:23.000 So when you look at crime stats, you have to be pre-like 2012 or whatever it was that he did this, or there's no race involved.
00:13:34.000 France did that too.
00:13:35.000 They don't know how many blacks are in Paris because demographics are illegal to study.
00:13:40.000 That's good.
00:13:41.000 I like less information.
00:13:42.000 That empowers people.
00:13:44.000 And de Blasio didn't like that the gifted programs were all Asians and didn't have enough blacks.
00:13:49.000 So what do you do?
00:13:51.000 Give black people school choice.
00:13:53.000 Do you have charter schools in Harlem?
00:13:55.000 Get their grades up?
00:13:56.000 No, you just kill the entire program.
00:13:58.000 Problem solved.
00:14:01.000 Hey, there's too many rich people.
00:14:02.000 They're making too much money.
00:14:03.000 Take all their money.
00:14:04.000 Now there's no more rich people.
00:14:07.000 Next challenge.
00:14:08.000 Anyway, listen to this, the logic of the youth.
00:14:12.000 I mean, I can say it more directly.
00:14:13.000 You weren't gifted, talented, or smart.
00:14:15.000 You were just most likely, statistically speaking, an upper-middle-class white kid.
00:14:20.000 And so your school district rewarded you by giving you the title of gifted.
00:14:25.000 And then they used that as an excuse to pull resources from your black and indigenous, low-income, disabled, neurodivergent peers.
00:14:32.000 Wait, stop.
00:14:33.000 And gave them to you.
00:14:34.000 They took money from disabled children?
00:14:38.000 So there's a gifted program, but the gifted programs are all over the place.
00:14:43.000 They're in the South Bronx.
00:14:47.000 They're mostly poor Chinese people.
00:14:51.000 Neurodivergent.
00:14:53.000 Why are disabled people not smart?
00:14:56.000 Disabled people are poor?
00:14:57.000 What the fuck is she talking about?
00:15:02.000 You.
00:15:03.000 You benefited from the system of white supremacy and classism because you could uphold it as more likely than not an upper middle class or middle class white kid.
00:15:16.000 You were the reason and the excuse for withholding resources from marginalized students, and you were complicit in accepting them.
00:15:22.000 And I know you were a child, and I know you probably didn't have a lot of say, and you also didn't have a lot of perspective.
00:15:27.000 But as an adult, you don't have any perspective.
00:15:29.000 You don't know what race is in gifted programs, you stupid bitch.
00:15:34.000 Her research is based on her just going, that's where she gets her information from, her own vacuous mind.
00:15:43.000 And all that meant is that you could thrive under classism and white supremacy.
00:15:49.000 Unpack that.
00:15:51.000 The idea that being gifted and getting something based on purely your merit and your education has something to do with race is just so beyond me.
00:16:01.000 But it's an effort to look at everything through that lens.
00:16:04.000 And there's never been anybody to say, well, there's more gifted kids.
00:16:09.000 I don't want to listen to a black woman talk about racism.
00:16:14.000 Went to see the Tyson Wilder fight.
00:16:16.000 Walk into a bar, cop buddy, he's paying for everything because he fucked up the original plan, which was to go to this other bar.
00:16:23.000 And anyway, we walk in.
00:16:27.000 There's this Armenian dude there.
00:16:29.000 My cop buddy says, anyone want shots?
00:16:31.000 So now we're best friends.
00:16:33.000 I've never saw that before.
00:16:35.000 You go to a new place, you offer the two strangers next to you shots out of the gate.
00:16:40.000 Now they love you.
00:16:42.000 And this guy, he looked like a Bond villain.
00:16:44.000 And we'll get to James Bond in a second.
00:16:45.000 But he had a baby eye.
00:16:49.000 What?
00:16:50.000 He was a tough-looking dude, right?
00:16:53.000 Looked like he was into petty crime, petite larceny.
00:16:56.000 But he got stabbed in the eye in a fight.
00:17:00.000 And apparently, your eye deflates.
00:17:03.000 Like.
00:17:06.000 And it still worked, though.
00:17:08.000 So he had a tiny eye and a normal eye.
00:17:11.000 And guess what else he had?
00:17:13.000 A fucking 10 under his arm.
00:17:16.000 Guys, you need to get facially abused to get a hot chick.
00:17:21.000 You need a scar.
00:17:23.000 Get a scar across your face.
00:17:25.000 Get facially abused.
00:17:27.000 Seen.
00:17:28.000 Get stabbed.
00:17:29.000 Half-seen.
00:17:31.000 If you're in a fight and a guy pulls out a knife, go try to get your face on it.
00:17:38.000 Even when I went to visit Tommy Robinson, there was this guy who had been attacked with a machete.
00:17:43.000 He was one of Tommy's hooligan buddies who said, I said, do you support the police here or how does it work?
00:17:48.000 Because where I'm from, Patriots are pro-cops.
00:17:51.000 And he goes, no, mate.
00:17:52.000 We fucking hate the culprits down here.
00:17:53.000 Fucking hate them.
00:17:55.000 And then I talked to Tommy later and I go, Tommy, your buddy there to pick me up at the airport.
00:18:00.000 He said, you guys all hate cops here?
00:18:01.000 He goes, no.
00:18:02.000 We fucking police are on our side, mate.
00:18:05.000 And I go, but he says that he hates him.
00:18:07.000 He goes, yeah, of course he hates him.
00:18:09.000 He's a criminal.
00:18:12.000 So anyway, in this machete attack, because that's who you're fighting down there, not knives, machetes, he blocked it.
00:18:17.000 It went in, chopped him up like butcher meat, but he also got one across the face.
00:18:22.000 And as the woman was stitching his face up, she said, y'all going to do real well with the ladies after this.
00:18:28.000 So it's a universal thing, well-known thing.
00:18:31.000 The formerly wounded pup.
00:18:34.000 Yeah.
00:18:34.000 This guy, yeah.
00:18:35.000 Oh, my God.
00:18:36.000 That guy would be a fucking nerd if it wasn't for that.
00:18:38.000 Totally.
00:18:39.000 He can fuck anyone.
00:18:41.000 All of these guys can fuck even many tonight.
00:18:44.000 Past this prime, but he looks badass.
00:18:46.000 Oh, yeah.
00:18:47.000 That's amazing.
00:18:48.000 You know, the other thing you have to do when you have a facial scar is be super polite.
00:18:52.000 That's the way you make it scarier.
00:18:54.000 That's probably the best one.
00:18:55.000 You got the Glasgow smile.
00:18:58.000 Is that really a Glasgow smile?
00:19:00.000 Right?
00:19:00.000 And that when they cut you.
00:19:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:19:02.000 Looks like it.
00:19:03.000 I mean, because both sides are affected.
00:19:06.000 Oh, that guy.
00:19:07.000 I have a boner.
00:19:09.000 I'll fuck him right now.
00:19:10.000 I'll get a face scar.
00:19:11.000 Fuck it.
00:19:14.000 So, yeah, we're doing.
00:19:15.000 But the undercards were amazing, and the fight was so good.
00:19:18.000 But again, I'm doing shots all night.
00:19:20.000 I'm blitzed.
00:19:22.000 And so the only thing I could do to enjoy it was to slap myself in the face again and again, trying to sober up during the fight because I wanted to see it and I wanted to remember it.
00:19:31.000 And I realize now how bizarre that must have looked to be sitting watching a fight with someone and to see one of the guys not talk to anyone, not say, watch this, just be going, yep, and whoops, whoops, whoops.
00:19:45.000 I was nailing myself.
00:19:47.000 But it was an amazing fight.
00:19:48.000 Tyson Fury does this thing where he puts himself on you and blobs on you.
00:19:53.000 And it happens to me sometimes inspiring.
00:19:56.000 And you know, your health thing in a video game where it's all green?
00:20:00.000 You could just feel it, go when someone does that.
00:20:03.000 And it worked on Wilder.
00:20:06.000 But that's not to say that the whole fight was this constant clinching.
00:20:11.000 It was a part of it.
00:20:12.000 That's part of Fury's techniques.
00:20:13.000 But it didn't ruin the fight.
00:20:14.000 There was full-on brawling.
00:20:22.000 Oh, 277 pounds.
00:20:25.000 Fury 6'7.
00:20:27.000 He gets up after that, right?
00:20:29.000 Yes.
00:20:30.000 Oh, I'm not sure.
00:20:32.000 They were knocked down a million times.
00:20:35.000 It was an 80s fight.
00:20:37.000 Wow.
00:20:37.000 Look, this is the best fight you've seen in recent history.
00:20:40.000 Oh, that's what everyone was saying at the gym this morning.
00:20:42.000 They were like, the 80s are back.
00:20:44.000 Like, this was Tyson era, HBO, like the glory days.
00:20:50.000 Hagler and Hearns.
00:20:51.000 Look at him.
00:20:52.000 What was that right there?
00:20:58.000 Oh, shit.
00:21:00.000 That was fucking brutal.
00:21:06.000 Yeah, I think that falls just sheer exhaustion.
00:21:13.000 So, of course, like, Deontay Welder could be such a hero.
00:21:16.000 He's got a handicapped daughter that he took up boxing to pay for, you know, all her special needs.
00:21:23.000 But he's a moron and a goof and a pussy.
00:21:26.000 Like, last fight with Fury, he said his ridiculous shredder costume, which was downright embarrassing, he dressed up as shredder, was so heavy that it tired him out and he couldn't fight.
00:21:38.000 And then this round, he goes, Fury had plaster of Paris in his boxing gloves.
00:21:44.000 I want them inspected.
00:21:47.000 You know what was in his gloves, though, was horse hair.
00:21:50.000 Maybe that's an Irish good luck thing?
00:21:52.000 Was there actually?
00:21:53.000 Yeah.
00:21:54.000 Look it up.
00:21:56.000 Fury had horse hair.
00:22:00.000 But yeah, maybe boxing's back.
00:22:03.000 That was an exciting evening.
00:22:05.000 Get Mr. Larry in here.
00:22:09.000 So, wait, what?
00:22:10.000 Yeah.
00:22:10.000 Oh, yeah, that's what everyone said, too.
00:22:12.000 We need to bring back fights with Barnes.
00:22:14.000 Look.
00:22:18.000 Path and Sports put stitching into their gloves, like soda's Rey is and so does Everlast MX.
00:22:25.000 We've dissected thousands of gloves, but I'm just saying, with these stitches, you can't manipulate.
00:22:31.000 I mean, where's it going to go?
00:22:32.000 How's here?
00:22:33.000 You grab it and you tell me, where's it going to go?
00:22:36.000 Why would Fury jeopardize his entire career, his entire legacy, by cheating?
00:22:41.000 That's like a 1970s thing.
00:23:05.000 That last clip reminded me of that new Matt Damon movie where some chick's going to get killed.
00:23:11.000 It's medieval nights, and there's no black people in it.
00:23:14.000 And I was watching, I went to see James Bond this weekend at this awesome theater in Yonkers called the Alamo.
00:23:19.000 It's a chain.
00:23:20.000 I think they started in Texas.
00:23:22.000 It's one of these Eaton thing, like Nighthawk in Brooklyn.
00:23:24.000 Very nice, yeah.
00:23:25.000 Oh, it's the best.
00:23:26.000 And you can just tell the people that run it love movies.
00:23:30.000 The fucking bill was a little heavy.
00:23:35.000 Wow.
00:23:35.000 I think I sank $200 into that.
00:23:37.000 But my whole family got to eat.
00:23:39.000 There is five of us.
00:23:41.000 It adds up.
00:23:44.000 So, what was what?
00:23:45.000 20 bucks?
00:23:48.000 40 bucks each?
00:23:50.000 Is that it?
00:23:51.000 It's one of them.
00:23:52.000 Yeah.
00:23:52.000 Yeah, that's it.
00:23:53.000 I mean, I'm sure it's not the same one, but whatever.
00:23:55.000 But they're showing that movie, the medieval night movie, and I'm just like, please don't have black people.
00:24:00.000 Please don't have black people.
00:24:00.000 Please don't have black people.
00:24:01.000 I'm sorry if that sounds racist.
00:24:03.000 But they weren't around.
00:24:05.000 And when you stick them in a movie, it makes you look like a pussy.
00:24:08.000 It makes you look like you're saying, please don't boycott me.
00:24:11.000 Please kill me last.
00:24:14.000 Well, look, I'll stick a black person in here.
00:24:17.000 And it's also insulting to black people because it implies they need to see someone like them in a movie where there was zero black people around.
00:24:25.000 Boy, that must hurt, eh?
00:24:29.000 I mean, you're either speared with a lance or you have the impact of a fucking baseball bat going into your chest.
00:24:38.000 Dude, I really am so pissed I missed the Renaissance Fair.
00:24:42.000 Oh, it's Gagan?
00:24:43.000 It's Gagan.
00:24:45.000 But they do jousting, and it's pretty hardcore.
00:24:49.000 Yeah, I meant to go to that.
00:24:50.000 Dude, it's a lot of fun.
00:24:52.000 I heard it's...
00:24:53.000 Well, like I, back when I was cool, I was against it.
00:24:56.000 But now that I'm a dad, I'm allowed to do nerdy shit.
00:24:58.000 Oh, that would be the coolest thing.
00:24:59.000 I hear you just drink tons of beer.
00:25:01.000 You drink tons of beer.
00:25:01.000 You eat a big old turkey leg.
00:25:03.000 There's bitches with their titties all puffed up and they're talking all gay.
00:25:06.000 It's awesome.
00:25:07.000 We went to medieval times for one of my birthdays.
00:25:09.000 I can't remember when it was.
00:25:11.000 And we kept yelling out, you literally rule to the king.
00:25:19.000 Uh-oh.
00:25:20.000 This looks very uncomfortable.
00:25:23.000 What are you going like 20 miles an hour?
00:25:25.000 You get a pole in your chest at 20 mph?
00:25:28.000 Anyway, so then we sit down to James Bond, and I was obviously petrified.
00:25:34.000 It was going to be woke.
00:25:35.000 It's woke.
00:25:36.000 Everything woke turns to shit.
00:25:37.000 You ruined the Sopranos movie.
00:25:39.000 Please don't ruin this.
00:25:40.000 I am happy to report it's only a little woke.
00:25:45.000 Okay.
00:25:45.000 Are there spoilers in what you're about to say?
00:25:47.000 Yeah.
00:25:48.000 Oh, man.
00:25:48.000 Okay.
00:25:49.000 Spoilers.
00:25:52.000 Oh, yeah.
00:25:52.000 I called Nita Fashions after I left the theater and I said, stop, stop.
00:25:57.000 I said, you guys need to do a James Bond thing.
00:26:00.000 I don't care if you get sued.
00:26:01.000 Look, you're in fucking China.
00:26:03.000 Hong Kong isn't British anymore, right?
00:26:05.000 It's Chinese.
00:26:06.000 You can't get sued.
00:26:07.000 You have to have a James.
00:26:08.000 Because I was watching the whole movie going, I'm getting that.
00:26:10.000 I'm getting that.
00:26:11.000 I'm getting that.
00:26:12.000 And I go, I can't be the only one.
00:26:15.000 So they're going to put it on there.
00:26:16.000 They agreed with me.
00:26:17.000 Do you know what I've been making them rich?
00:26:20.000 Nice.
00:26:21.000 The pandemic would have crushed them.
00:26:23.000 We send them at least two customers a day.
00:26:27.000 And when you're a customer, I'm not talking about a bubblegum store where you might just go in and buy five cents.
00:26:32.000 When you're a customer at Nita Fashions, they examine your whole body and then you're on file forever and you buy a shirt like two years every two, you just keep buying.
00:26:44.000 So each customer is probably bringing them over the course of a lifetime six grand?
00:26:51.000 So I've been making them 12 grand a day.
00:26:54.000 And by the way, they're back on tour.
00:26:56.000 Go to 17.
00:26:58.000 So they're going to be in your town soon.
00:27:00.000 You set up an appointment, and that's the funnest part is they measure you.
00:27:04.000 You see the fabrics.
00:27:05.000 You touch the fabrics.
00:27:08.000 So we got New York for October.
00:27:11.000 Then there's DC.
00:27:12.000 They get a hotel room downtown.
00:27:15.000 Where is this?
00:27:16.000 Boston, Chicago.
00:27:18.000 Oh, I should send my cousin there to Chicago.
00:27:20.000 Atlanta, Houston, Dallas, Miami.
00:27:26.000 They're killing it.
00:27:26.000 Too bad they're such nice guys.
00:27:29.000 They should be doing Coke and fucking tons of chicks everywhere they go.
00:27:32.000 Imagine they are.
00:27:33.000 Oh, we are, buddy.
00:27:34.000 No, they're very proper.
00:27:37.000 Very proper people.
00:27:38.000 What a waste.
00:27:39.000 If he was a drug addict, Cokehead, drunk, he'd be like, I'm sorry, I have to leave you, my sweet angel.
00:27:46.000 I have to go to do my hard work.
00:27:48.000 I have to bounce like a toad.
00:27:50.000 Yeah.
00:27:51.000 And then just like, I got a girl in every city and they all know my name.
00:27:55.000 That's a Lars Fredrickson quote.
00:28:01.000 So yeah, that's exciting.
00:28:02.000 James Bond, Nita Fashions.
00:28:05.000 And you don't have to be like this guy, who's a gay nerd for a Bond.
00:28:10.000 No, no.
00:28:11.000 You don't ever tell anyone that your outfit was inspired by James Bond.
00:28:15.000 Let me make that crystal clear.
00:28:20.000 No.
00:28:20.000 This guy is a good one.
00:28:21.000 This is exactly as gay as having a Batman sticker on your car.
00:28:25.000 Yeah, he's like a Marvel nerd.
00:28:27.000 There's no difference.
00:28:31.000 He has the car.
00:28:32.000 He has the watch.
00:28:33.000 I mean, he's rich as shit.
00:28:36.000 He's got every little piece of bond thing.
00:28:39.000 Put some calipers to it, you would see those differences.
00:28:41.000 This is embarrassing.
00:28:43.000 He drives the Aston Martin and all that.
00:28:46.000 Don't do that.
00:28:48.000 Now you're into like Bruce Wayne.
00:28:50.000 That's not what I'm talking about.
00:28:51.000 I'm talking about you have great outfits that are inspired by a movie.
00:28:56.000 Okay?
00:28:56.000 Like the best dressed person in the world is David Cassavetes in Rosemary's Baby.
00:29:03.000 Every single outfit in that movie is...
00:29:07.000 That's what you should all look like at all times.
00:29:11.000 Mine's going to pull it up.
00:29:12.000 The best looking woman is Terry Garr in Oh God.
00:29:15.000 But woman, no.
00:29:17.000 Ladies, you can look that up if you want.
00:29:18.000 No, that's not him.
00:29:20.000 What are you doing?
00:29:22.000 David Cassavetes?
00:29:23.000 Yeah.
00:29:24.000 Rosemary's baby.
00:29:27.000 You just showed me Daniel Craig.
00:29:29.000 Are you in?
00:29:30.000 Oh, I'm on a different screen.
00:29:31.000 Sorry.
00:29:32.000 Jesus H. Look at him.
00:29:35.000 Fantastic.
00:29:36.000 Look at that.
00:29:37.000 Even his PJs are awesome.
00:29:39.000 Oh, a brown sweater with a blue dress shirt.
00:29:42.000 Can't say enough about Beige and blue.
00:29:45.000 It's supposed to be John Cassavetes.
00:29:46.000 Oh, sorry, John Cassavetes.
00:29:47.000 Yeah, I was thinking of his son.
00:29:49.000 Or his dad or some shit.
00:29:53.000 Great suits in that.
00:29:54.000 Basically, we were done.
00:29:56.000 We were done with how men should look in around 1965.
00:30:01.000 Look at that suit.
00:30:04.000 There's no need to change.
00:30:04.000 It's like my dad says about the rhythmics.
00:30:09.000 There's no need to write any more songs.
00:30:13.000 Perfection has been achieved.
00:30:15.000 Here comes the rain again, falling on my head like a memory.
00:30:24.000 So in James Bond, the outfits are stupendous.
00:30:26.000 Like a beige corduroy suit.
00:30:30.000 Why didn't I think of that?
00:30:31.000 With a blue shirt and a tie.
00:30:33.000 Tuxedo's great.
00:30:35.000 A thick gray wool suit.
00:30:38.000 You can't really see that.
00:30:40.000 That suit's corduroy.
00:30:42.000 Now, he just got blowed up, so it's looking a little crumpled, but I mean, I'm gay.
00:30:48.000 I'm gay.
00:30:53.000 Right now, I have a boner.
00:30:55.000 I'm in love with that man.
00:30:57.000 See, look, Nita, if you're watching, go back up a little bit.
00:31:00.000 Other people are doing it.
00:31:02.000 It's not a copyright.
00:31:04.000 You just say inspired by.
00:31:05.000 You don't say this is the officially endorsed.
00:31:08.000 There we go.
00:31:09.000 See, that's all I'm saying you should do, guys.
00:31:11.000 People have been seeking out his fashion for a while.
00:31:13.000 Like even me, like that Henley is a rag and bone, about like $100 Henley, and it's always sold out.
00:31:19.000 I hate that stupid sweater, by the way.
00:31:21.000 It's got two little strings.
00:31:23.000 I was saying to my daughter, what the fuck is this for?
00:31:25.000 She goes, I don't know.
00:31:26.000 Maybe you want to tie it, make your neck tighter.
00:31:28.000 I go, no, people have hoods.
00:31:30.000 They want to tie their hood tighter, but no one wants their open neck sweater to be a little more snug.
00:31:37.000 What?
00:31:38.000 Is there something weird about the tie clip and the pocket square?
00:31:42.000 Yeah, it's not making me horny.
00:31:45.000 It's quiet.
00:31:46.000 It's quiet for that, right?
00:31:47.000 Yeah.
00:31:48.000 It's confusing.
00:31:49.000 And there's a lot of double-breasted suits, which I hate because when you undo them, they're these flounging panels.
00:31:59.000 But yeah.
00:32:00.000 Yes, there's a black woman in it.
00:32:02.000 Yes, they've desexed him.
00:32:05.000 Like he meets this fucking knockout who's going to take to a thing and you go, oh, you're going to fuck her in the closet, I guess.
00:32:11.000 And she goes, oh, no, sorry.
00:32:12.000 I'm just here for the mission.
00:32:13.000 Here.
00:32:13.000 She gives him a tuxedo, and then she turns around while he changes.
00:32:17.000 And then the black woman, what they did was they went, okay, let's start with what she has to look like, and then we'll find an actress like that.
00:32:26.000 That's not meritocracy, dummies.
00:32:28.000 That's not going to work out very Well, for you.
00:32:30.000 So, what they did was they got a woman who is as black as this marker, short hair, right?
00:32:37.000 She can't have like wannabe white hair, so she's hideous, and a huge fat ass the size of Ryan.
00:32:45.000 If he had his arms wrapped around his knees, like you could easily smuggle a person in her ass.
00:32:51.000 Just a big, fat, shitty, gross ass with no tits.
00:32:55.000 Like your mom, she looked like all your mom's friends.
00:32:58.000 And so the feminists were happy.
00:32:59.000 And to me, that just looks like, like I said before, don't kill me, kill me last.
00:33:04.000 Please, PC gods, are you appeased by this sacrifice?
00:33:08.000 And it doesn't work.
00:33:10.000 Like, say you made James Bond exclusively, everyone in the movie was white.
00:33:14.000 Some blogger, like that dumb bitch at the beginning of the show, might talk about black and indigenous peoples and blah, blah, blah.
00:33:18.000 It'll die.
00:33:20.000 The root might make you, might be mad.
00:33:24.000 But so what?
00:33:25.000 Yeah, there she is.
00:33:28.000 So she's like the perfect black woman.
00:33:30.000 She's not too white looking.
00:33:32.000 She's nice and dark.
00:33:33.000 She's not trying to do anything with her hair.
00:33:35.000 She's also gross.
00:33:37.000 She's a four.
00:33:40.000 That's generous, dude.
00:33:41.000 She looks like a cool guy to hang out with, right?
00:33:44.000 Don't you want to shoot hoops with him?
00:33:46.000 She looks like one of the black dads that sticks around and is responsible.
00:33:51.000 Yeah.
00:33:51.000 We go to baseball partners every week.
00:33:53.000 Look at her fucking eyebrows.
00:33:54.000 Are those sleeping bags?
00:33:57.000 So there's one scene where she fucks with his car in Jamaica.
00:34:00.000 He hangs out in Jamaica.
00:34:01.000 And she was, you need a ride.
00:34:04.000 You da, don't fuck around, Kebbin.
00:34:06.000 You get a beautiful scene.
00:34:07.000 And he's like, yo, Roy.
00:34:09.000 And then he gets on the back of her scooter.
00:34:12.000 And I was staying in the car with the family.
00:34:14.000 I go, I know a dude who was on his dirt bike.
00:34:16.000 He fucked it up really badly, and it was irreparable.
00:34:19.000 So they said, all right, we'll hop on the back and we'll drive into town.
00:34:22.000 We'll figure out a way to pick this up.
00:34:24.000 And he goes, no, thanks.
00:34:25.000 I can't ride on the back of someone's bike.
00:34:27.000 So he walked three miles into town, which is what you do.
00:34:30.000 You never, ever, under any circumstances, go on the back of someone's bike.
00:34:34.000 You've got to tell your Puerto Rican brethren that, too.
00:34:36.000 I see them sitting on the backs of bikes on a regular basis.
00:34:39.000 It's not a good look, dude.
00:34:42.000 And dirt bikes, they use a lot, too, in the area.
00:34:45.000 Yeah.
00:34:46.000 So he's there.
00:34:46.000 He's got his arms around her waist and she's driving to his house on her Vespa.
00:34:53.000 Like, get in the back.
00:34:54.000 I'll drive.
00:34:55.000 And then it gets worse.
00:34:57.000 At the very end, they're going to this secret lair, Poison Island, and they're dropping a glider out, right?
00:35:04.000 I guess they want to go so low they can't be seen.
00:35:06.000 And he goes, he gets in the back.
00:35:10.000 And he goes, you ever driven one of these before?
00:35:12.000 And she goes, nope.
00:35:13.000 By the way, guess what her number is?
00:35:16.000 007.
00:35:17.000 Yep.
00:35:18.000 It's been retarded.
00:35:20.000 You didn't think they'd retard the number, did you?
00:35:22.000 And then later on in the movie, she goes, can he have it back?
00:35:30.000 That was really good.
00:35:31.000 You know what's cool about this movie?
00:35:33.000 It's all about a virus, a manufactured virus.
00:35:39.000 So it feels very current.
00:35:43.000 Is this the trailer for it?
00:35:44.000 Yeah.
00:35:46.000 Right?
00:35:47.000 Oh, they're showing older movies, though.
00:35:51.000 It's a wax jacket.
00:35:53.000 Gorgeous.
00:35:54.000 He reminds me of Steve McQueen, who's so sexy.
00:35:58.000 My mom married my dad because he was dressed like Steve McQueen once.
00:36:02.000 He had a Harrington on.
00:36:03.000 And my dad, by the way, had a broken nose.
00:36:05.000 It looks like that.
00:36:06.000 That got him tons of pussy.
00:36:07.000 Okay, two chicks.
00:36:09.000 It's Harrington season right now, isn't it?
00:36:10.000 Yep.
00:36:11.000 I'm going to get one.
00:36:13.000 A fake one.
00:36:13.000 That was a little bit annoying that Ramek Malik was supposed to be like 50 years old.
00:36:22.000 Ew, really?
00:36:23.000 Yeah.
00:36:26.000 That was a cool scene.
00:36:31.000 Ramek Malik saved that woman you just saw when she was eight years old.
00:36:36.000 So I got like, I was sitting there in the theater doing the math, and I think I could make him as young as 40, but it's not easy.
00:36:45.000 And he doesn't look 40.
00:36:47.000 He looks 30.
00:36:49.000 You got to add crow's feet and shit.
00:36:50.000 Oh, yeah.
00:36:51.000 So I was saying that in the car, and my youngest boy, my nine-year-old, I go, you can't be on the back of a woman's moped.
00:36:57.000 And he goes, James Bond's supposed to be a big boy.
00:37:03.000 He's right.
00:37:04.000 He's absolutely right.
00:37:06.000 But yeah, he looked like such a cuck in the back of that drone.
00:37:11.000 And here's the funny thing about affirmative action, too.
00:37:13.000 They made her, she's there with, clearly not because she's a good actress or anything, right?
00:37:21.000 They started with the color of her skin, her hair, the size of her ass.
00:37:25.000 Those were all the preconditions, and then they got some random actress that fit that, which means she's not going to be a good actress.
00:37:30.000 So you're watching her.
00:37:32.000 She's a terrible actress, totally posey of the movie.
00:37:34.000 She's got this real attitude, like she doesn't like James Bond, which is stupid.
00:37:38.000 You have his number.
00:37:40.000 I assume they'd all be looking up to the number one Secret Service agent of all time, but it's like, oh, so you think you're Bond, right?
00:37:49.000 And so you're just like, I hate this bitch.
00:37:51.000 And so they gave an incompetent woman the job, and they made black women look bad.
00:37:56.000 So you're having the reverse effect.
00:38:00.000 Bad move.
00:38:01.000 But yeah, the scene on the back of the scooter is very brief.
00:38:05.000 You think he's going to fuck her and she's there because she's a spy.
00:38:08.000 He doesn't get laid once the whole movie, which is weird watching James Bond.
00:38:14.000 But there's a scene on the back of the scooter and then there's that drone scene I just told you about the glider scene where he looks like a little bitch in the back seat.
00:38:22.000 But those are very brief and we don't really see her much.
00:38:24.000 Oh, then there's one thing.
00:38:26.000 I'm not really ruining anything, but this guy, there's this big vat of acid and this guy is a genetic genius.
00:38:32.000 He's a scientist, biochemist, and he's like, I could wipe out your whole race without touching a thing.
00:38:39.000 Because he can program these little DNA robots to go after certain DNA patterns.
00:38:46.000 So he's saying, I could just end the black race.
00:38:48.000 And she goes, yeah, I'll think I'm dumb with you.
00:38:52.000 And she kicks him into a vat of acid.
00:38:55.000 So you need to die if you suggest a racist thing.
00:39:00.000 It's gay.
00:39:02.000 Was he a bad guy?
00:39:04.000 No.
00:39:05.000 What?
00:39:05.000 Yeah.
00:39:06.000 What a bitch.
00:39:06.000 Oh, that was a cool scene.
00:39:08.000 Is this the trailer?
00:39:08.000 Yeah.
00:39:10.000 They always show like the best things in the trailer.
00:39:12.000 Yeah, you're ruining the movie right now.
00:39:17.000 Spoilers, and it's only the trailer that's doing the spoiling.
00:39:20.000 Yeah, they just spoiled that scene.
00:39:21.000 You just saw how he got out of that scene.
00:39:23.000 Yeah, that does suck.
00:39:31.000 And you know what's not in it?
00:39:33.000 I hate like triple-double traitor shit.
00:39:37.000 What do they call it?
00:39:38.000 Triple-double cross.
00:39:39.000 Where, oh, you can't trust him.
00:39:40.000 Oh, no, the head of Q is actually evil.
00:39:43.000 Blah, blah, blah.
00:39:44.000 That's boring to me.
00:39:45.000 Just show me the good guys and the bad guys and let's fight.
00:39:47.000 There's the scene.
00:39:48.000 That's what I'm talking about.
00:39:50.000 She's never driven one of those before.
00:39:52.000 But we'll give it to the new agent.
00:39:56.000 There's also something very consequential at the end, but I will not discuss it.
00:39:59.000 Yes.
00:40:00.000 Thank gosh.
00:40:01.000 When are you going to go see it?
00:40:03.000 Friday nights are movie night, but I don't know if we could wait.
00:40:06.000 We saw Venom.
00:40:10.000 You know, now that we do these hour shows, we're coming to a close.
00:40:12.000 That's true.
00:40:13.000 Can you believe that?
00:40:14.000 Yep.
00:40:15.000 But I got it.
00:40:16.000 Some guy sent this in a baby monster.
00:40:17.000 I'm not going to save it for the mailbag, but it's so beautiful.
00:40:21.000 It's our new obsession, Taneshi Coates.
00:40:23.000 And speaking of Taneshi Coates, Eddie Gowd is the same exact person.
00:40:27.000 They have the same soul.
00:40:28.000 Eddie Gloud Jr.
00:40:29.000 Eddie Gloud Jr.
00:40:30.000 Gloud being Latin for lame.
00:40:33.000 And I was just thinking on the way here today, I was like, God, I wish me or someone honest was in that room where he goes, America is not unique in its sins.
00:40:44.000 America is not without fault.
00:40:49.000 But what we need to do is look in the mirror, the mirror, and see who we are before we can move forward and forgive ourselves for our past.
00:41:01.000 And remember, they're all going, mm, mm-hmm.
00:41:03.000 I just thought, God, why couldn't me or someone normal like Norm McDonald be there and go, you really are full of yourself, aren't you?
00:41:11.000 What are you talking?
00:41:12.000 Is this a sermon?
00:41:14.000 What are you doing?
00:41:15.000 This is a political show.
00:41:16.000 We talk about the news of the day.
00:41:18.000 You're on some pulpit there doing a really bad Martin Luther King impersonation.
00:41:23.000 Our sins?
00:41:24.000 What are you, my fucking priest?
00:41:26.000 God damn.
00:41:28.000 I hate to see people get away with this.
00:41:30.000 William Trump is too easy.
00:41:33.000 And it's sins.
00:41:36.000 We're not unique in our evils, to be honest with you.
00:41:41.000 We didn't benefit from the myths and legends because we had to bear the brunt of them.
00:41:43.000 It's our refusal to acknowledge them.
00:41:46.000 Look, I would just like to go.
00:41:47.000 I'd just like to go.
00:41:48.000 Sorry, Eddie, what's with your mouth?
00:41:50.000 What's that little smirk you're doing?
00:41:53.000 Look at this guy.
00:41:54.000 Don't say word, don't say word, don't say word, don't say word.
00:41:56.000 Say a word.
00:41:58.000 What a great.
00:41:59.000 Talk about get fired, get in trouble.
00:42:00.000 This should be the perfect time to lose your job at MSNBC.
00:42:05.000 It's not about race.
00:42:07.000 Or even all you can do is just when he's done, just go.
00:42:10.000 Oh, Lord.
00:42:11.000 You done?
00:42:12.000 And then you done?
00:42:13.000 Then he touches them.
00:42:14.000 He puts his hand on his shoulder.
00:42:15.000 Oh, yeah, I love that.
00:42:16.000 There are communities that have had to bear the brunt of America confronting people.
00:42:20.000 Oh, he uses that multiple times.
00:42:21.000 Hears them.
00:42:24.000 And it happens every generation.
00:42:27.000 So somehow we have to kind of, oh, my God, is this who we are?
00:42:32.000 And just again, another, think about it.
00:42:34.000 Now, two of you.
00:42:35.000 By the way, we've watched this a million times.
00:42:36.000 And his point is ridiculous.
00:42:38.000 His point is that the Tea Party was racist and he warned us and we didn't listen.
00:42:44.000 No, the Tea Party was not racist, you fucking dunce.
00:42:47.000 Nice theory and nice fake glasses.
00:42:51.000 Anyway, so Taneshi Coates, exact same person, exact same race hustler, exact same bullshit.
00:42:57.000 It's a whole industry.
00:42:59.000 Buchanan warned us about back in 2001.
00:43:02.000 If there's no racism, they're out of a job.
00:43:04.000 So they have to keep pretending that we all give a shit.
00:43:08.000 As I've said a million times, we are way too selfish to be racist.
00:43:13.000 If someone is going to be a cool friend who's going to like the Mets and share my sense of humor, you think I'm going to deny me that amusement?
00:43:21.000 Same with the place of work.
00:43:23.000 Someone is going to save you money.
00:43:25.000 They know the tax laws.
00:43:27.000 They're great at scheduling.
00:43:29.000 They're going to control your whole workforce and make sure everyone shows up and everyone works hard and your productivity is going to go through the roof and your taxes are going to be nothing.
00:43:38.000 You're hired.
00:43:40.000 I don't care if you have a swastika tattoo on your face.
00:43:43.000 You're hired.
00:43:44.000 Can you put some makeup on, though, when you come to work?
00:43:46.000 I don't want to scare the Jews.
00:43:49.000 So this is fucking fantastic.
00:43:51.000 Taneshi Coates, he really, his career started when he did an article, I believe it was in The Atlantic, and it was the case for reparations.
00:44:01.000 He made a very compelling case that we should all pay blacks a bunch of money, which I believe, as Owen Benjamin pointed out, we already did that with stolen bikes.
00:44:10.000 The number is like $3 billion, whatever.
00:44:13.000 And it would, I assume, you'd have to trace your lineage back to slavery.
00:44:16.000 You can't be a Jamaican immigrant who just got here yesterday, right?
00:44:20.000 And then we'd also, once we trace your lineage, we'd have to make sure that you didn't get 40 acres and a mule or anything that was the deal.
00:44:28.000 So PBS goes back over his life and discovers that his great granny was a slave.
00:44:36.000 Okay, that's pretty bad.
00:44:38.000 A rich slave.
00:44:39.000 What?
00:44:39.000 Who got out super early.
00:44:41.000 What?
00:44:41.000 No, no, no, no, no.
00:44:42.000 And got tons and tons of land and tons of money and was treated great.
00:44:47.000 Oh.
00:44:48.000 So if there are reparations, I don't get any?
00:44:51.000 No, I'm afraid not.
00:44:52.000 Your great-great-great-granny was a great, great, great landowner who had plenty of money and was doing great.
00:45:00.000 She would crack the whip to the runaways, put them in the hot box, punish them bravely.
00:45:05.000 They promised us land.
00:45:07.000 Yeah, your great-great-grandmother got tons of land.
00:45:09.000 Oh, well, some didn't.
00:45:10.000 Okay.
00:45:11.000 Well, they didn't give her a mule.
00:45:13.000 You're out of the argument.
00:45:14.000 So you see him, he's crushed.
00:45:16.000 He's crushed to learn this.
00:45:18.000 The guy doing the PBS thing is dumb.
00:45:20.000 So he's just like, wow, this is awesome.
00:45:22.000 You should be thrilled.
00:45:23.000 Here, show it.
00:45:36.000 with the estate.
00:45:40.000 Man named Henry Jones.
00:45:42.000 Jones was a farmer, and this inventory, compiled after his death, lists the values for all the property he owned, including Tanahasse's third great grandmother.
00:45:55.000 Negro girl Harry, $250.
00:45:58.000 Hmm.
00:46:00.000 Still got something.
00:46:02.000 That is your third great grandmother.
00:46:04.000 I think he's trying to cry.
00:46:05.000 Please cry, please cry.
00:46:07.000 Someone else's property.
00:46:09.000 Her value worth $250 at $2,015 at $8,000.
00:46:15.000 Yeah, it was happy.
00:46:17.000 It was happy.
00:46:18.000 Almost every African American grapples with the fact that some of their ancestors were enslaved.
00:46:24.000 And those ancestors can be glimpsed through the records of their owners.
00:46:30.000 Unlike Harriet's slave.
00:46:35.000 Her owner, Henry Jones, died in 1899.
00:46:40.000 The world gave Harriet two things that few slaves ever receive.
00:46:44.000 Freedom and land.
00:46:47.000 Oops.
00:46:48.000 It is my will and desire that my slave Harriet shall be free at the age of 28 years.
00:46:54.000 I give my slave Harriet five acres of land at the south end.
00:46:59.000 I think I know why.
00:47:01.000 Five acres of land.
00:47:04.000 Paul's third edition.
00:47:06.000 This is not your typical African-American story.
00:47:10.000 Not your typical slave experience, right?
00:47:12.000 Yeah.
00:47:12.000 Okay.
00:47:13.000 You have written so eloquently about the slavery.
00:47:16.000 Silly kiss your ass.
00:47:17.000 And reparations.
00:47:18.000 You need to shut up.
00:47:19.000 But you are one of the handful of African Americans who descend not unilaterally from enslaved people, but from free Negroes on your mountainside.
00:47:33.000 Do I get a badge?
00:47:34.000 Do I get some cookies?
00:47:35.000 No, you can't write about reparations anymore.
00:47:38.000 You're one of them free Negroes.
00:47:40.000 I don't think I know why.
00:47:41.000 I don't know what you're joking about, sir.
00:47:43.000 That's exactly the case.
00:47:44.000 You frog.
00:47:47.000 Let's jump to the mailbag.
00:47:48.000 I don't think I know why.
00:47:49.000 And I think I know why.
00:47:52.000 Oh, I got my old computer here for some reason.
00:48:00.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a death.
00:48:05.000 Let's turn our fries together's mailbag.
00:48:10.000 Let me touch it.
00:48:13.000 Ryan's Jesse Lee Peterson was the funniest imitation yet.
00:48:17.000 Ryan, you have a gift, but you sing like a fag and your music is all retarded.
00:48:24.000 Ryan doesn't suck.
00:48:28.000 Please keep my email private.
00:48:29.000 I'm military.
00:48:30.000 Give Ryan some fucking credit.
00:48:32.000 He shreds on guitar pretty good for a gay.
00:48:35.000 I want to know how to join Prowboys Arizona.
00:48:37.000 I'm stationed here now, blah, blah, blah.
00:48:39.000 Ryan, keep it up with the guitar.
00:48:40.000 I followed you on Instagram.
00:48:41.000 Wasn't sure if it's actually you, but you're Trump, Bird, Jordan Peterson, blah, blah, blah.
00:48:46.000 Personation, kill me.
00:48:47.000 Love the show, guys.
00:48:48.000 I'm a patriot who's been serving 14 years.
00:48:50.000 Thank you for your service.
00:48:52.000 If you want a military perspective on anything, let me know.
00:48:55.000 I would love to call the live show, but I'm always at work being three hours behind.
00:49:00.000 Oh, my stars.
00:49:01.000 Very loud.
00:49:06.000 Fruit fly issue easily solved.
00:49:08.000 We got a lot of letters about fruit flies.
00:49:10.000 Apparently, their eggs are everywhere already, just waiting to hatch.
00:49:15.000 And if you get bananas, you should wash the bananas with dish soap.
00:49:19.000 That washes the eggs off.
00:49:23.000 And what they'll do is you get rid of them all, right?
00:49:25.000 Then they go to find like a wet plant or something, and the eggs are there forever.
00:49:30.000 So once you got fruit flies, you got them forever.
00:49:32.000 And I don't want to mislead the public here.
00:49:34.000 We don't have fruit flies everywhere.
00:49:37.000 We see one or two.
00:49:38.000 I just am confused by them.
00:49:39.000 I haven't seen them all day.
00:49:40.000 And people say, oh, they're in your sink.
00:49:42.000 Our bathroom isn't in the studio.
00:49:44.000 We have to go down the hallway to a shared bathroom that our neighbors use.
00:49:48.000 So that doesn't work.
00:49:51.000 Good afternoon, gents.
00:49:52.000 I've tended and operated a bar for about 12 years.
00:49:54.000 Your issue is not exactly fruit flies.
00:49:56.000 You have drain flies.
00:49:57.000 We don't have a drain, sir.
00:49:59.000 When I want to do the dishes, I have to put them all in a big bucket and then walk them all the way to a totally different part of the building to put them in the dishwasher.
00:50:08.000 So they live off little remnants of sugar, beer, or liquor being poured down into any of your drains.
00:50:12.000 We don't have drains, so go fuck yourself.
00:50:16.000 Hey, Gavin, you ever read the Unibomber Manifesto?
00:50:18.000 It's one of the most insanely fascinating manuscripts I've ever read.
00:50:21.000 I thought it would have been the ramblings of an obvious psychopath, but when I actually sat down and listened to it for over a few work commutes, it turned out to be an extremely prescient analysis of how modern leftism developed.
00:50:30.000 Every 10 seconds, he mind fucks you with a nail-on-the-head revelation and explanations about where their minds are at.
00:50:36.000 Take a few of these passages, for example.
00:50:38.000 Feminists are desperately anxious to prove that women are as strong and as capable as men.
00:50:42.000 Clearly, they are nagged by a fear that women may not be as strong and capable as men.
00:50:49.000 He also says, leftists tend to hate anything that has an image of being strong, good, and successful.
00:50:54.000 They hate America.
00:50:55.000 They hate Western civilization.
00:50:56.000 They hate white males.
00:50:57.000 They hate rationality.
00:50:58.000 The reasons that leftists give for hating the West, etc., clearly do not correspond with their real motives.
00:51:07.000 Uh-oh.
00:51:08.000 I'll call them back.
00:51:10.000 They say they hate the West because it's warlike, imperialistic, sexist, ethnocentric, and so forth.
00:51:14.000 But where these same faults appear in socialist countries or in primitive cultures, the leftist makes excuses for them.
00:51:20.000 Or at best, he grudgingly admits they exist.
00:51:22.000 Whereas he enthusiastically points out, and often greatly exaggerates, these faults when they appear in Western civilization.
00:51:28.000 Yeah, I was looking in the James Bond movie that one of the scenes is in Cuba.
00:51:33.000 And I was just like, even in the glory of cinema, where they had all these billionaires at this secret place, you still see the urban decay of that island.
00:51:42.000 And it's a beautiful island, could have tons of money, could have tourism and sugar and coffee and everything Costa Rica has, but socialism has just destroyed it.
00:51:53.000 And then people always say, yeah, but America ruined it.
00:51:58.000 By what?
00:51:58.000 Not giving it money?
00:52:01.000 That's like me being broke and saying I'm pissed off that Ryan isn't giving me tons of money.
00:52:05.000 I could be really successful if Ryan would just give me all his money.
00:52:07.000 America's not your problem.
00:52:09.000 And you got tourism from Canada and Europe and all over the fucking place.
00:52:12.000 No, it's because you're a socialist.
00:52:15.000 And I think I'm the one.
00:52:23.000 I voted what to do.
00:52:28.000 Gavin, to become an informant?
00:52:29.000 Uh-oh.
00:52:30.000 This beta male, part of the movement, which is the resistance, needs to crop out he, him, his receding hairline like the other bald guy does.
00:52:38.000 It'd be less triggering.
00:52:40.000 This is from David Farr.
00:52:42.000 Anti-David Farr, he calls himself.
00:52:44.000 Does that mean he's Antifa?
00:52:47.000 If an ARA, the FBI should be looking at Gavin McInnes as someone who'd likely give up a lot of info on the org.
00:52:55.000 His split with the Prowl Boys and the fact that he's the type who talks big but would snap under pressure makes him a great target for questioning.
00:53:06.000 When I read stuff like that, I'm like, come at me, David Farr.
00:53:10.000 I'll come harder than fucking Jussie Smalley.
00:53:15.000 Like this fucking pussy talking about how I would.
00:53:18.000 I come really, really hard.
00:53:23.000 Who is he?
00:53:24.000 Now I have to go look him up.
00:53:26.000 And I can't see, that's another frustrating thing about being banned from Twitter.
00:53:31.000 I can't go fight him.
00:53:33.000 I mean, I can't even message him and go, listen, you fucking pussy.
00:53:38.000 Did you look him up?
00:53:40.000 Anti-David Farr?
00:53:42.000 I'm anti-David Farr.
00:53:44.000 There was that woman who wanted to 2,000 followers.
00:53:48.000 Look at his fucking face.
00:53:50.000 He thinks I'm a pussy who cracks under pressure.
00:53:52.000 He doesn't.
00:53:53.000 But he also believes in love and flowers.
00:53:58.000 You know that we were looking at one of those signs, and there's the water is life is at the bottom of one of them.
00:54:03.000 But the bottom of another one says, we respect disabilities.
00:54:10.000 And it took me a while to realize this.
00:54:12.000 My wife got it right away.
00:54:13.000 But they're talking about Trump when he went, so first of all, he didn't know that that guy was handicapped.
00:54:19.000 He wasn't going handicapped.
00:54:20.000 He was just being like frustrated person.
00:54:22.000 Uh-uh, I'm Ryan.
00:54:23.000 Oh, I don't know what's going on.
00:54:24.000 That's what he was doing.
00:54:26.000 No one knew that guy was handicapped.
00:54:28.000 He crops out his gimp hand in all his photos.
00:54:30.000 And he's not a video journalist.
00:54:32.000 He's a writer.
00:54:32.000 Anyway, so that became Trump Disrespects Disabilities.
00:54:36.000 And then that became all of us, you and I, when we see someone in a wheelchair, we're like, that's fucking shitty legs, bitch.
00:54:46.000 Like their view of us is beyond comical.
00:54:53.000 Okay, let's...
00:54:55.000 Oh, yeah.
00:54:56.000 Find that woman.
00:54:57.000 So someone sent Ryan a request.
00:54:59.000 They want to ask me about Proud Boys, but they're not right or left.
00:55:02.000 They just want to ask some questions.
00:55:03.000 Something about Enrique is getting real stinky, and they want to ask me some questions.
00:55:07.000 I might fold under pressure from this woman.
00:55:11.000 The fact that he's the type who talks big, but would snap under pressure.
00:55:15.000 Could I have had more fucking pressure?
00:55:19.000 I'm completely canceled.
00:55:21.000 My friends are thrown in jail.
00:55:22.000 The DA came to my house with detectives.
00:55:24.000 They did try to question me.
00:55:26.000 It didn't go great.
00:55:28.000 I said, yes, I'd love to talk to you.
00:55:30.000 Let's get my lawyer.
00:55:32.000 Let's set up an appointment.
00:55:33.000 That sounds fantastic.
00:55:34.000 And then they lost interest.
00:55:38.000 But go back to her.
00:55:40.000 Zoom out so we can see her.
00:55:42.000 Okay, do we want the DMs?
00:55:45.000 Yeah?
00:55:45.000 Okay.
00:55:48.000 Laura Jade.
00:55:50.000 So she wants to buy y'all some beers, man.
00:55:53.000 I'm not Antifa.
00:55:54.000 I don't want to do a gotcha.
00:55:56.000 I just want to learn more about Tario's influence on the Proud Boys and McKinnis stepping down in 2018, man.
00:56:01.000 That's all I want to know.
00:56:02.000 Come on, man.
00:56:04.000 Come on.
00:56:05.000 I was vice principal in the Barack Toboggan.
00:56:07.000 And so you look, you look, these people always leave a digital footprint of themselves.
00:56:11.000 A journalist, you might not want to smear your rabidly leftist ideology all over the internet and then contact people and pretend to be totally groovy, man.
00:56:22.000 So buy some fucking beers, dog.
00:56:26.000 Let me guess.
00:56:27.000 Childless spinster.
00:56:30.000 Colostomy bag for strangers come.
00:56:32.000 No family, no hope of a family.
00:56:39.000 6 o'clock on PST on a Thursday, which means that it is time to continue our delightful exploration of Andy Noe's horrible book and whether it continues to be horrible.
00:56:52.000 I don't want to spoil anything, but I've read ahead a little bit and the answer is below.
00:56:58.000 So we are going to be able to do that.
00:57:01.000 Wait, go to the interview she had with a bunch of people who milkshaked Andy No.
00:57:07.000 That's who milkshake Andy No.
00:57:09.000 They're not sending their best.
00:57:20.000 He didn't get them poured.
00:57:22.000 They kept getting accidentally spilled.
00:57:23.000 Sorry, accidentally spilled.
00:57:25.000 He was trying to squeeze into a dance party.
00:57:27.000 And anyway, we'll talk about it.
00:57:29.000 Yeah, yeah, we'll get there.
00:57:31.000 They love drinking bourbon, don't they?
00:57:32.000 That's like, they think they're the chick in Indiana Jones who was having the drinking contest.
00:57:38.000 That chick from Animal House with the Mongolians.
00:57:41.000 And then they just get shit-faced after one.
00:57:44.000 They look like they're in the band of The Beats from Doug.
00:57:48.000 I'm not familiar with that.
00:57:49.000 Some beats.
00:57:50.000 We'll get that reference.
00:57:50.000 All right, that's enough.
00:57:52.000 Enough mail.
00:57:53.000 Look at that.
00:57:54.000 This is the new, our new look.
00:57:57.000 Boo-boo's got a brand new look.
00:58:01.000 Let's jump to the final video.
00:58:17.000 Pretty fast, huh?
00:58:19.000 You know what?
00:58:19.000 I'm going to do something unusual here, Ryan.
00:58:21.000 We're going to do two final videos, and they're not in the final video section.
00:58:28.000 So let's start with 5-7.
00:58:30.000 This is some female cops.
00:58:31.000 It's one of my favorite subjects: female cops being useless.
00:58:35.000 And by the way, it's not Indigenous People's Day, it's Columbus Day.
00:58:39.000 Happy Columbus Day.
00:58:41.000 I'm a little annoyed that you chose to make, even my wife, who's Indigenous, said, Why didn't you just make it a different day?
00:58:49.000 That's a real fuck you.
00:58:50.000 Like, you're really stirring up trouble by making Indigenous Day Columbus Day.
00:58:54.000 There's 364 other days.
00:58:57.000 That was, of course, Joe Biden's move.
00:58:59.000 But this is Christopher Columbus, a man who navigated the globe unheard of back then, just using stars, fucking compasses, some magnets.
00:59:08.000 Like, you try it with modern technology and get back to me.
00:59:12.000 And he came to the Caribbean where savages were eating each other.
00:59:16.000 And he treated them with their same savagery.
00:59:20.000 Yes, he cut out their tongues when they stole.
00:59:22.000 That's what you did back then.
00:59:23.000 That's what they were doing to each other.
00:59:25.000 They were cutting out each other's tongues and then eating the tongues.
00:59:28.000 In fact, they were happy when Columbus showed up because they said, can you get these guys to stop eating us, please?
00:59:34.000 Anyway, it's Columbus Day.
00:59:36.000 And here we are looking at female cops who are just like the woman in James Bond, not hired for merit.
00:59:41.000 Look at her.
00:59:43.000 Perfect.
00:59:44.000 Stop.
00:59:47.000 Did you see that?
00:59:49.000 She was a spectator.
00:59:52.000 She just went, whoa, that guy.
00:59:54.000 Somebody call the cops.
00:59:55.000 Yeah.
00:59:56.000 That perp's running away.
00:59:57.000 Oh, look, my partner's chasing him.
00:59:59.000 Where are you guys going?
01:00:01.000 You hear an ice cream chocolate show?
01:00:05.000 Look at her face.
01:00:07.000 Help, help.
01:00:08.000 Someone stole my purse.
01:00:09.000 What?
01:00:10.000 Oh, geez.
01:00:12.000 I better get out of the way.
01:00:13.000 She literally steps back out of the way.
01:00:16.000 And then this poor bastard has to run at 100 miles an hour.
01:00:22.000 Okay, let's say 26 miles an hour.
01:00:25.000 Through the turnstiles.
01:00:27.000 Oh, ugh.
01:00:28.000 He wipes out.
01:00:29.000 Ow.
01:00:29.000 Ugh.
01:00:30.000 Gets back up.
01:00:31.000 Whenever I see fat cops, I just think, you should be fired.
01:00:35.000 You need to be able to run like this.
01:00:38.000 You have to be brave and fit.
01:00:40.000 She's fit and not brave.
01:00:42.000 Most fat cops are brave and not fit.
01:00:44.000 They're fat.
01:00:45.000 Anyway, this resolution looks like Minecraft.
01:00:48.000 So he gets him.
01:00:50.000 But here's a better resolution.
01:00:51.000 This is my female cop friends back in my hometown of Quebec, province of Quebec.
01:00:58.000 I assume this is in Montreal, but.
01:01:00.000 Yeah, the guy filming is one of these Haitian immigrants.
01:01:03.000 He's speaking patois.
01:01:05.000 Franglish.
01:01:07.000 Okay, we got him.
01:01:08.000 We got the perp, boss.
01:01:11.000 We're good.
01:01:11.000 Let's just get his hands behind his back.
01:01:13.000 Oh, he's kind of resisting a little bit.
01:01:16.000 Wait, I can't get it.
01:01:18.000 I can't.
01:01:19.000 I can't.
01:01:20.000 Hey, hey, hey.
01:01:22.000 No, I changed my mind.
01:01:23.000 I don't want to be arrested.
01:01:24.000 Get off of me, bitch.
01:01:26.000 I said, get off of me.
01:01:28.000 God, you're annoying.
01:01:30.000 Get off.
01:01:31.000 Fuck it.
01:01:32.000 Will you stop it?
01:01:33.000 I said I don't.
01:01:34.000 Fine, take my jacket.
01:01:35.000 Bye.
01:01:36.000 Mike!
01:01:38.000 Oh!
01:01:39.000 Look, let's get back in the car.
01:01:40.000 We've got his coat at least.
01:01:42.000 Oh, oh, Monsieur Agon.
01:01:44.000 Monsieur A. Gon.
01:01:50.000 Oh, wouldn't it be great if they crashed the car?
01:01:52.000 Left the handcuffs there.
01:01:56.000 I mean, ladies, what are you doing?
01:01:58.000 Timothy McVeigh was right.
01:02:01.000 By the way, if you do read the Unibomber Manifesto, not Timothy McVeigh.
01:02:06.000 I'm turning into Biden.
01:02:08.000 Make sure you never say it.
01:02:09.000 It's like the Unibomber says in his manifesto.
01:02:11.000 You're just going to have to not give the source whenever you talk about that because it doesn't help your argument.
01:02:18.000 All right, that's it.
01:02:19.000 Our new shorter, sleeker shows.
01:02:21.000 We'll see how this works.
01:02:22.000 We might go back to long show.
01:02:23.000 I don't fucking know.
01:02:25.000 Until tomorrow, get fired.
01:02:28.000 Get in trouble.
01:02:29.000 Be brave and never stop fighting.