@AuntyJenny Slaps Modern Woman With A Dose of Reality
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
199.7841
Summary
In this episode, I chat with a good friend of mine, who is also a wife and mother of 5 kids. We talk about what it's like being a wife, being a mother and what it means to be a wife. We also discuss the difficulties of being a stay at home mum and how to balance it all with being a mum.
Transcript
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but then also i'm how many how many meals can you cook would you say like if you had to make a menu
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of your food how many meals oh i don't know but in the double digits okay so like 10 20 yeah
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no which one 10 20 or 50. um like 15 20 30 25. okay okay cool so he gets 25 meals
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roughly and oh yeah no i'm just asking yeah he gets yeah yeah okay do you have any other questions
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again too no i just want to know yeah i know when you said i'm about um when it gets to the end but
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i also know that i won't be in that position unless i know that he can provide a certain lifestyle
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i like that's just you can never afford to have children i know if you think you're gonna save
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up to have children forget about it i'm not but i can never afford categorically tell you if if life
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happens and we might end up in a situation but i can categorically tell you i'm not entering a
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situation like that no there's no baby leaving my body without a ring on my finger can i come
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to your wedding of course i die of course you can there's nothing wrong with having kids without
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marriage i mean i was born outside of marriage but it's not happening for me it's not are you
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religious i don't are you religious i'm a christian yeah okay then that just changes things a little
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bit why before she said that i was thinking you don't stand a chance it's very rare now at least
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she's got a there's a percentage there not very high but this sort of percentage you don't stand a
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chance for what kids no for the happy whatever and the regular out there and the way the way she
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sounded it just sounded like impossible it just doesn't sound like real i don't know it depends
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i can't yeah well not having kids before marriage no no i'm gonna i'm gonna wake up for an hour and
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meditate before my kids oh no not not meditate for an hour oh my god no like 45 minutes no no i mean
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like everything that i do like right now currently everything i do takes about 45 minutes in the
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morning that's from waking up to having my shower meditate vj breakfast but well sometimes yeah oh
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sorry journaling it's just where you just like get like but it's not like happy journey it's just like
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you get any like horrible thoughts out any emotions so it's just you just get it out it's done leave it
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there you don't carry on into the next day you don't carry it into the day why wouldn't you just pray
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pardon no i pray as well um and i sometimes i do it twice a day sometimes i do it once a day it
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it really depends um but i'm just i don't need to take negative emotions from one day into the next
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day and sometimes a lot of times when you think something's happened or someone's done you something
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they actually haven't it's just you're in your feelings and you get it out and it's also instead
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of offloading onto another friend not all the time do i need to call my friend i'm like oh my god can you
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believe this happened and they're like yeah oh my god f that be ended just get it out boom done move
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on what would you do for your husband every day because i've heard about the kids i've heard about
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you i haven't heard about your husband yet like clean okay outside of that anything else be his
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support system okay how i don't know what that looks exactly what that looks like but if he told
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me it looks like xyz then it's xyz okay okay um what about you what kind of wife do you want to be
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you i feel like um i was born quite maternal quite wifely and i sometimes it's a con because you
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carry wifely duties before when you did girlfriend prices when i am a wife um i have kind of similar
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views i'll you know i want to raise my children to a certain age and then they can get into education
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or whatever um if during that time my man is the provider then i'll have to step up and do most
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homely things but then when i do continue to go back to work or start providing also whether it's
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for everyone or just you know partly um i'd want him to step in slightly more and maybe one night
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help with the cooking or unload the dishwasher i don't think it should be all on me um but yeah i'm
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a very giving person i'm very caring nurturing person so whatever he needs if he needs help within
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his work you know i'll always try i won't i won't ever say no or decline anything i always try okay
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could i could i get more specifics because this is just very broad specific in what like what what
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exactly you would do every day like as a wife and you said like you did the stuff at like wifey things
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at girlfriend oh yeah what does that mean no i cook i clean you know i'd wake up make the bed if do
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you think do you think do you think a man paying for a date is doing husband things at boyfriend
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prices do i think a man paying for a date yeah i'm paying for a date is that doing husband things at
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boyfriend prices because a lot of times i think like we say we cooked we cleaned and that's that's
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wifey things at girlfriend prices but then they protect and provide possibly yeah okay so you think
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a man shouldn't pay unless he marries you no i don't think that but if you know i'm choosing to
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cook and clean you can choose to pay if you want to pay if you don't want to pay i'm not getting
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on to you about that same way if i don't cook you're not going to get onto me about that we're not at
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that level yet they might get onto you about it they might they have the choice to but i also have
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the choice to you know but i feel like if you don't display that you can do those things then you're
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not going to get to that marriage stage just like looking after the kids not necessarily but i just
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mean like the cooking and the cleaning that's a slippery slope oh because the women then like they
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want to show you all they've got in their locker and then the man's like oh might as well just
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chill like this they get used to it yeah something why is it that when women talk about doing stuff
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for a man the first thing they talk about is cooking and cleaning like a man can't do it himself
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they never talk about i want to hear but the men can cook and clean nowadays if the man can't cook
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and clean you shouldn't be with them your husband can cook and clean he's got cable looking after
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himself so they're just talking about doing something that a man can already do for himself
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what's the next suggestion i don't think there's any right or wrong answer for that i think everyone's
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everyone's marriage is going to be different i think we're all saying the right things
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personally that's how i feel i think just add to each other's life when you're not getting married
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invite me please i'd like to see that's all i'm saying invite me i can't wait to get married
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i can't wait for you to get married i'd love you i can't wait for you to get married i can't wait
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what would you suggest adding to the resume i know there's some things that we've been working on like
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we're making a cookbook i think they need to um borrow their nieces and nephews during half term
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it's half term if they live on their own then get a couple of days off have them around let the
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parents just leave them there then get on with it listen i understand it's not just cooking and cleaning
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like i've for example been a nanny before and give him sex every night as well yeah on top of the
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cooking and cleaning and looking after the kids and doing the shopping and getting all the delivery
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done and sorting out all his paperwork and is that what we're missing sex what do you think a man would
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say that's what merging your life is you're you've decided to merge both your lives together and then you
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just work through it it's not like you have one role and i have one role we're just we're doing
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it whatever fits i do feel i think in my marriage i definitely feel like there would be set roles
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i was gonna say if the man was at home all day and you got all them kids in there you're still
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gonna fit in sex room though yeah when they're napping what if they don't nap it's those ways
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around it don't help her i i think the kids love like what is it coco melon and whatever just
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coco melon grace is cool now they're walking you know jumper room things whatever all the comments
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are saying that these answers are very vague i don't even know what they're saying
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well i'm not gonna go into like you know okay as a non-married woman those people saying i'm being
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vague i would wake up make sure everyone's alive and well i'd start going about my day think about
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what i'm gonna do if i have children i'm getting them ready if my husband's going to work and i'm
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still looking after the kids at home he can go off to work you okay if you eat and cool let me know about
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your day be be on about your way i'll take care of the kids if you've got any stuff coming up try
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take them for a walk hopefully the dishwasher is done by the night before empty it out go about
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my business think about what i'm gonna cook look in the fridge start preparing that one's watching tv