JustPearlyThings - August 15, 2023


Man On The Panel Schools Emotional Man


Episode Stats

Length

7 minutes

Words per Minute

245.57726

Word Count

1,874

Sentence Count

121


Summary

In this episode we talk about Emotions and how to control your emotions. We discuss the difference between women and men when it comes to dealing with emotions and how we can control our emotions. Also, we discuss how to deal with emotional breakdowns and how important it is to be emotionally available.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Where we're like kind of deviating is because we're speaking about emotions, you know what I'm saying, and that's where, like, again, not to say you are or you're not, but the emotions start to jump out of you, you know what I'm trying to say as a man, you know what I'm saying, is to be able to control your emotions, you know what I'm saying, cry or don't cry, you've got to be able to control your emotions, and what we've seen there is you've got emotions, the mic's out, you know what I'm saying, so you're not necessarily controlling your emotion, and that's where in today's society, a lot of men
00:00:29.980 are emotional, you know what I'm saying, that's why they do an erratic thing, that's why they're going to punch up this and do that, but when you're in control of your emotions, you know what I'm saying, you're not really going to be thinking irrational, because when you're, women, like, get emotional, and then they'll throw a cup at you, oh, you're a bastard, you're a bastard.
00:00:46.020 Not gal, I know, but go on.
00:00:47.180 But I'm saying, that's generally, yeah, women are more emotional, and they're going to do their things, they start to rip your jacket, because it's emotional, you know what I'm saying, but men are not really like that, but if you're a man and you know how to control your emotions, you're not really
00:00:59.900 going to be losing it here, there, and everywhere.
00:01:02.000 Controlling emotions comes down to the individual's character, do you know what I'm saying, someone goes through certain trials and tribulations, traumas, and stuff like that, and then, like, they'll be able to, like, if they go through, like, for me, for instance, yeah, I've gone through personal issues, like my dad had cancer, yeah, recently, yeah, and I went through that, and obviously it hit me hard, but obviously I've been using the gym, I've been working on myself mentally, I've been managing emotions through differently, do you know what I'm saying, too?
00:01:22.360 So I think there's a time and place also to, like, you know, break down and stuff like that as well. I don't think, me personally, I wouldn't go, like, if I was, like, seeing someone, I wouldn't go to the girl and break down to her, so it's not my character, I would just do it in my own time, because I like to self-reflect as he is a man.
00:01:38.460 But I feel a lot of guys I know, a lot of my friends, they will be a bit more emotional, they will break down and, you know, they want me to handle certain things, and I think a lot of females do put a time limit until when, okay, cool, you've been crying now for, like, three months, when are you going to go and get your shit together?
00:01:52.360 So I feel a lot of females will say, oh, I want a guy to be a bit more emotionally available, but when he's way too much emotionally available, then it's like, okay, cool, I've lost the spectrum, you know, you've been down for, like, three months, when are you going to get your shit together?
00:02:03.380 Women want strong men, but I feel, but there isn't a lot of strong men, though, that's the truth.
00:02:08.120 Because me and me, but, you know, the truth is, though, the truth is, you know, the truth is, you know, the truth is, you know, the truth is, you know, the truth is, you know, the truth is, you know, if I was, I'm a girl, I feel like I'm a strong man, you understand? I feel like it, I move like it, if I cry, does that make me weak?
00:02:20.900 Listen, let me explain.
00:02:22.080 It don't make you weak.
00:02:23.160 Right then, so what's that saying?
00:02:24.320 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:02:25.280 But you know what, hold on, hold on, hold on.
00:02:27.020 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:02:28.460 I would say it makes you weaker, yeah.
00:02:31.500 It depends how many times, though.
00:02:33.080 I just think it's like, it's like common sense.
00:02:35.100 It depends how many times, though.
00:02:36.500 If a guy's, wait, wait, wait.
00:02:37.900 So if a guy's crying more than the guy who's not crying, like, I don't, like, what are we...
00:02:42.260 Yeah, but the person who's not crying is bottling up their emotions.
00:02:46.820 They're going to be emotionally weak.
00:02:48.380 Their mental health is going to be weak.
00:02:49.580 What I'm trying to cue...
00:02:50.660 Compared to...
00:02:51.260 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, let me stop, let me stop.
00:02:53.740 That's a feminine way to deal with things.
00:02:55.840 Women bottle up our emotions and we explode.
00:02:58.040 Men are not the same.
00:02:58.980 And so this is why we're in, we're in a feminine, like, social order,
00:03:02.800 where the woman's, like, point of view is assumed to be everybody's point of view.
00:03:07.360 And we're teaching men to have a woman's point of view.
00:03:10.260 We're missing, this is the point, what you're missing, because, like,
00:03:16.400 earlier on when you explained something, you said,
00:03:18.500 I go gym, so there's no way that man could have...
00:03:20.360 Physically, you may be strong.
00:03:23.720 I'm not saying you are, but mentally, you may be weak.
00:03:26.700 And when Pearlie said about women rinsing out men,
00:03:30.000 men get to a certain age and they commit suicide.
00:03:32.640 To me, yeah, and apologies to anyone who's known someone who's committed suicide,
00:03:37.060 but those people are mentally weak,
00:03:39.300 because to me, like, for you to take your life, you know what I'm saying?
00:03:43.360 Because of whatever circumstances,
00:03:45.100 and that has a knock-on effect for all the people around you,
00:03:47.520 your family, your friends.
00:03:48.580 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:48.680 To me, that's weak.
00:03:50.400 It's an easy option now, you know what I'm saying?
00:03:52.380 Yeah, but I'll be honest with you.
00:03:53.680 I know someone that's committed suicide,
00:03:55.560 and I hear what you're saying in that,
00:03:56.640 but sometimes you're in it so much,
00:03:58.480 and it's like you're lost, you're so...
00:03:59.900 Yeah, because...
00:04:00.100 Because you can get lost quick.
00:04:01.440 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:04:01.740 And this is where everyone's got to understand.
00:04:03.600 They're lost because they're not in control of their emotions.
00:04:05.840 It depends on the person.
00:04:07.680 No, no, no, but being...
00:04:08.860 They're lost because we live in a world where literally we teach...
00:04:12.380 That's what I'm trying to...
00:04:13.020 Men have no direction,
00:04:14.120 and they're taught to be women from, like, the age of, like, five years old,
00:04:17.760 where they're told, don't fight on the playground.
00:04:19.540 But my guy, my guy, being in control of emotions is skill, you know?
00:04:22.360 It's a skill.
00:04:23.200 Exactly.
00:04:23.480 It's not something that you just spoke with.
00:04:25.420 It's a skill.
00:04:26.660 And lifestyle and situations will even make you or break you,
00:04:30.460 do you know what I'm saying?
00:04:30.840 And also people around you.
00:04:32.860 Look, me, my generation, a lot of men, we didn't have no guidance.
00:04:36.900 We had no guidance.
00:04:37.660 We had no male guidance at all.
00:04:38.480 Take it back a step, bro.
00:04:40.340 It's a skill to be able to control your emotions for men and women.
00:04:44.380 It's not a great thing for even women to be losing their rag and getting over emotional.
00:04:49.260 It's not great.
00:04:50.200 Like, it doesn't serve anyone any purpose.
00:04:52.480 Because when you get angry, you start saying things you don't necessarily mean.
00:04:55.200 And it happens a lot of times in relationships and with women arguing,
00:04:58.440 even in the office.
00:04:59.220 You don't have to treat women or men.
00:05:00.060 Yeah, but, like, women actually do get something out of it sometimes.
00:05:03.220 Because, like, there's a reason we do the things we do, right?
00:05:05.620 It's because we can exert control over men.
00:05:07.640 Manipulation.
00:05:08.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:05:08.800 Exactly.
00:05:09.320 But it's not a good thing.
00:05:10.880 Oh, it's not.
00:05:11.420 Oh, I didn't say it was a good thing.
00:05:12.700 I'm saying there's reasons that we do the things that we do.
00:05:15.320 You know, it's historical.
00:05:16.580 I understand that.
00:05:17.780 Like, why do you think women are always, like, you ever been in a relationship
00:05:20.160 and you're like, why is this girl always the victim?
00:05:22.180 Like, she's the victim in everything.
00:05:24.460 But there's a reason because, like, historically,
00:05:26.840 they could get resources and protection from a guy if they were the victim.
00:05:30.380 So there's, like, biological reasons.
00:05:32.020 Like, we don't undo biology.
00:05:33.560 That's what I'm saying.
00:05:34.320 Women are smart.
00:05:35.360 Women are manipulative.
00:05:36.880 Yeah, yeah.
00:05:37.320 That's right.
00:05:38.040 And men can never really win.
00:05:40.140 But, again, if you're in control of your emotions
00:05:41.680 and you've got a good sound factor,
00:05:43.660 you know what it is.
00:05:44.880 You know women are most...
00:05:47.280 But I think what you said,
00:05:50.100 where, like, a lot of men haven't been taught how to control their emotions.
00:05:52.520 That's the problem.
00:05:53.440 Wait, wait, wait.
00:05:54.080 So I think, like, but I think your point,
00:05:56.900 it shows how important it is that women keep the families together.
00:06:00.240 But right now we're in a society that women keep breaking up the families
00:06:03.700 because we leave men 80% of the time.
00:06:06.380 And a lot of the times when men leave,
00:06:08.100 it's, like, extreme situations.
00:06:09.360 Like, one of the number one things is she's abusive or on substances,
00:06:12.780 like, when men leave.
00:06:14.360 So it, like, so it kind of shows, like,
00:06:16.380 how important it is that we keep the family together
00:06:18.620 because we don't, like, we have so many emotional men,
00:06:21.520 but whose fault is it?
00:06:22.240 Is that the job for a female to keep the family together, though?
00:06:26.400 A hundred percent.
00:06:26.820 I think a man should keep the family together.
00:06:28.600 That's the man's job.
00:06:29.240 A man doesn't have a choice.
00:06:30.900 Exactly.
00:06:31.600 Again, well done.
00:06:32.260 So, okay, if me and you're in a relationship
00:06:34.380 and I say, or you say,
00:06:36.300 I'm staying in this forever.
00:06:37.760 We have a kid where I'm staying in this forever.
00:06:39.480 And I say, nah, I'm not feeling it.
00:06:41.680 I'm leaving.
00:06:42.580 Whose fault is that?
00:06:43.480 Mine.
00:06:43.700 I left.
00:06:44.560 Yeah.
00:06:45.000 But then I feel like a lot of men will be affected by that situation
00:06:48.120 and they'll be talking about getting to mental health
00:06:50.300 and all these other things.
00:06:51.580 But I feel a man, like, things can happen.
00:06:54.660 Breakups happen all the time.
00:06:55.760 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:06:56.280 A man can, I think, you know, carry in his life.
00:06:58.680 Yeah, exactly.
00:06:59.020 Adapt and move on and find someone else.
00:07:01.020 Well, I agree, but it's not that simple, right?
00:07:04.260 A hundred percent.
00:07:04.460 No, it's not that simple
00:07:05.500 because a lot of times women financially ruin these men.
00:07:08.180 Like, if you get divorced, it's like you have,
00:07:09.900 you have, out of all marriages,
00:07:11.180 you have a 15% chance of a woman maliciously,
00:07:13.860 like, taking away your kids
00:07:15.080 and, like, going out to financially ruin you.
00:07:16.960 So out of every 10, that means 1.5 are, like,
00:07:19.760 and that doesn't even include the women
00:07:21.440 that still get child support, still get alimony,
00:07:23.340 still take the kids away.
00:07:24.520 So that's one out of 10
00:07:25.580 where women are going out of their way to ruin men.
00:07:28.460 So it's like, you could say, oh, just move on,
00:07:30.900 but that's easy to say.
00:07:31.560 Some guys become homeless.
00:07:33.720 Some guys don't see their kids.
00:07:36.160 Like, they're taking away everything.
00:07:37.520 You know what?