JustPearlyThings - August 11, 2023


Masculine Man Debate Hard on Getting A Virgin as A Wife


Episode Stats

Length

16 minutes

Words per Minute

212.03477

Word Count

3,593

Sentence Count

2


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 i have a question why do you want to be married because if you're a selfish person it seems like
00:00:04.320 marriage just wouldn't be for you um sometimes it feels like you just have to and i apologize
00:00:11.440 sorry i apologize for freezing in the beginning it's my first podcast i got a little bit nervous
00:00:16.000 looking at pearl and i was stuttering i had a speech i prepared i apologize that's not what
00:00:20.880 you won't get yeah you're okay yeah you're not gonna get that yeah so why do you want to be
00:00:24.640 married it sounds like crazy but just the whole thought of the glamour side of it again i'm being
00:00:30.880 selfish the whole look of the wedding being in that white dress but then i'm just thinking about
00:00:36.240 myself again and it's poison and i admit that that's what they say women women want the marriage
00:00:41.600 the wedding they don't want the marriage yeah because being trapped down that terrifies me
00:00:46.720 but why do you look at it as trapped like what about it maybe it's because i'm damaged or i've
00:00:51.840 always been a free spirit ever since i was a child i always do what i want so if you're aware
00:00:57.200 of that why don't you try to heal that yeah but maybe i will get into that process but still now
00:01:02.480 i am that free spirit until something happens to me and i'll be like okay maybe i do need to change
00:01:08.000 that all right and i empathize with you because i've been broken and yeah i've been heartbroken i've
00:01:12.560 been there before so what i said i genuinely mean this i'm not judging you but what i'm saying is
00:01:16.560 if you're aware enough to realize that okay i'm broken i've gone through things in my childhood and
00:01:21.280 it's made me the person i am now okay but once you're aware of that you have the obligation
00:01:27.840 and responsibility to be better than that yeah because because i've i've let a heartbreak my
00:01:32.880 first ever heartbreak i've let that destroy me turn me into an evil person that hated women
00:01:37.440 i've done that and i and i learned from that and you know what i told myself never again
00:01:43.040 i'm going to be better to me i've been broken in multiple relationships so be better be better now not
00:01:49.680 not later listen now javania's shouting too much listen bro how could she be better bro oh tell
00:01:55.760 a teacher i i'm not a teacher but i will give you some advice from my personal experiences of healing
00:02:02.080 you know like i said it starts with awareness for one which i think i've i know you know because i am
00:02:08.880 broken i know that 100 and and that's fine there's a lot of broken people i've been broken before i'm not
00:02:14.240 judging what i'm saying is that when you realize that you are broken you have a responsibility to
00:02:19.600 yourself your well-being mentally spiritually physically to fix that and you have to hold
00:02:26.080 yourself accountable because you can't point the finger at the guys that broke you yeah it's me
00:02:30.320 that's responsible at the end of the day they're pieces of for doing what they did 100 i'm not saying
00:02:34.960 like don't hold them accountable but you have to hold yourself accountable over them because exactly
00:02:40.480 because every girl that broke my heart guess what i don't give a i don't give a crap about that because
00:02:45.280 you wonder what i entertain that experience and think when i can be positive about this and actually
00:02:53.520 realize it's a good thing in a way you turn it around oh 100 like i said in my field message in
00:02:59.520 the beginning because i i didn't think i'd be nervous but i was looking at pro i was nervous all knowledge
00:03:05.440 is given through pain and understanding you have to understand what that pain was there to teach
00:03:10.400 you when you put your hand on on a um when you're a kid and you don't know no better and you're just
00:03:15.120 playing around and you put your hand on a stove and your mom tells you now you know now you know the
00:03:21.280 lessons learned but you can't learn the lesson and continue to make the same mistakes the same decisions
00:03:27.920 and then get on instagram social media talk to all your friends and play victim and say i don't know
00:03:32.480 no better you know better you've been hurt before so why do you continue to put yourself in the same
00:03:38.080 situations talk to the same people put yourself in the same environments that's going to lead
00:03:42.720 you to the pain that you're saying that yeah i don't like so when it when i talk about healing
00:03:48.160 and i and i'm generally trying to help you because i because i understand the reality of women and i
00:03:52.960 understand the reality of men there's a lot of broken people out there and i and if there's anything
00:03:57.280 that i want to get forward to this podcast and a message is that you can you can heal yourself
00:04:03.040 i'm talking about literally you can heal yourself everybody talks about trauma everybody talks about
00:04:08.400 depression single person everybody ptsd everything struggling and telling you right now if you
00:04:14.720 dedicate this a year social media your friends respectfully how do you heal a hundred bodies hold
00:04:22.960 on i'm gonna get to it anyway i need you i need you to reel it in a little bit yeah i'm gonna reel it in
00:04:27.440 i'm gonna reel it in you're going for a while so i'm gonna reel it in so a hundred the the the real
00:04:33.600 thing would to do would be just be to be honest which i've done on this podcast i've opened up if
00:04:40.080 you're a woman that's been with a hundred men yeah if you're a woman that's been with a hundred men the
00:04:43.520 next thing to say to the man that you're interested is in look i i've made these mistakes look accountability
00:04:49.600 i think is the number one trait that men look forward to and women because yeah we can judge you off
00:04:54.960 your past that's natural trait for men but if you don't have any accountability we're not going to
00:04:59.760 feel sorry for you we're not going to be interested but i'm telling you right now if i met a woman that
00:05:03.360 was like yo i have like 7 500 bodies but you know what those men didn't deserve me and that was at a
00:05:09.440 point where i didn't realize my value was a woman i didn't realize i was giving away the most pure gift
00:05:14.080 that i have as a woman and now i realize that gift and that's what i'm that's how i'm gonna move forward
00:05:19.600 i respect that no i respect that listen bobs giovanni would you go for a girl that has over 100
00:05:26.720 bodies as your wife would you do that 100 bodies yeah over 100 bodies would you do that that's what
00:05:34.640 you're talking about no uh probably not but then again it also depends on the the so you're just
00:05:42.080 saying that what would you expect your woman to say to you like do you wanna say sorry or what no no
00:05:47.600 i'm not sorry because her decisions is her life and she shouldn't apologize for any decision that
00:05:51.600 she makes just like i'm not gonna apologize for any decision but i make but i think that there's
00:05:55.680 there's a point in your life where you have to be accountable and you have to be honest
00:05:59.360 and if you've slept with 100 men you can never take that back okay bro i don't see it as a problem
00:06:04.880 though would you accept that javani javani would you accept that your wife has slept over 100
00:06:11.040 men would you accept that in general no you mean general what was that let's move on and in general
00:06:17.920 subject no because like i said there is such thing as connection and no such thing is
00:06:24.160 how the way why don't why don't you see it as an issue what's even i with 100 yeah like you don't
00:06:29.520 because i'm just saying you live in reality reality you know men care about that stuff
00:06:33.600 right yeah so how because you don't think that could possibly be an issue later yeah it might be
00:06:41.040 but i never look at anything negative in life like i just feel like what's the point because you're just
00:06:46.960 going to get down about it anyway you can't do anything about it at this point no what's the point
00:06:50.880 i can't take back what i've done so what's the point when it was like what 16 17 when you lose your
00:06:59.520 virginity i mean i wasn't educated on about self-value and what it meant to give like your
00:07:05.040 body to someone so as a young lady if you're sleeping with people from i mean i lost mine at 17
00:07:10.960 i didn't have the knowledge that i have now that's then i did then so if you're a young lady having sex
00:07:17.760 when you're older you might look back and think oh maybe i shouldn't have made them choices because
00:07:20.880 now i'm more aware of the consequences so i think it's a bit difficult to say oh i wouldn't do that i
00:07:26.640 wouldn't marry someone who's set with that many people because they could be a completely different
00:07:30.000 person 10 years exactly i'm glad you brought the point because birkin you're 100 correct
00:07:35.600 i personally would not but when i said i think it i think that's it varies i'm talking about just for
00:07:41.440 the general man because like me like would you advise someone to do that to marry a girl with 100 bodies
00:07:49.440 i mean i i encourage people to follow their heart like i don't think it means
00:07:52.640 follow their heart bro follow their heart bro follow their heart because follow what heart bro
00:07:57.520 what are you talking about so you're telling me it's right you give advice someone to follow their
00:08:01.760 heart if they want to sleep with or get married to a girl that's had 100 bodies in our past yeah bro
00:08:08.080 if they love them i know what i would i know what i would i know what i would and wouldn't do
00:08:14.640 i wouldn't do that but at the same time why why would you not do that at the same time which one is
00:08:19.600 it bro listen which one is it listen would you or would you know would you go for a girl of 100
00:08:24.800 plus bodies or would you not me personally yes i said no i already answered your question so what
00:08:29.360 you what's your argument about no i'm not arguing are there or are there not men that out there that
00:08:35.600 would accept that there's there's a lot of men but i don't know how valuable they don't know what
00:08:39.840 they're doing okay but that's not what the question was the question you asked me if i would accept
00:08:44.400 that i said no and i said they asked me what the woman in their position would do and i said the
00:08:50.880 best thing that they could do is admit to the wrongs and tell the man that they're interested
00:08:55.840 everyone should follow their heart bro you're saying it's right yeah for a guy to get married to a
00:09:00.720 girl that's got 100 plus bodies you think that's right if that's what he believes in i don't think
00:09:05.120 that's not the right way to go that's not the right way to go that's not the right way to go
00:09:10.160 you're putting your views on other people i'm not respectfully i respect your opinion
00:09:14.800 but i'm not doing that i like i agree with you mean you're on the same page as far as not accepting
00:09:19.760 that but i'm not going to put my views on other people and tell them not to accept that if they
00:09:24.160 choose that that's what they choose to do and then the result of that is what the result
00:09:28.000 of it it just if you like if it's someone you care about you would you like my brother yeah right
00:09:34.640 oh yeah i'm saying okay but he's talking about men in general but if it's like family yeah that's one
00:09:38.880 different that's different you should have said family no wait wait wait wait wait so i'm saying
00:09:43.280 if someone if it's someone you care about you would tell them not to do that someone i care but yeah
00:09:47.680 we're always talking about people we care about or people in general well i mean people in general but
00:09:51.520 but i mean you know if it's good advice you would tell them not to mess with someone like that no no offense
00:09:56.960 but let me tell you something yeah sorry but sorry to interrupt cool so you're gonna get married
00:10:01.760 yeah listen you're gonna get married yeah cool you're gonna have kids right yes or no you're gonna
00:10:06.400 have kids right yes sir yes cool so it's your kids yeah they're gonna ask you where did you meet mom
00:10:11.920 like where did you meet her you're gonna say oh after she sucked how many dicks after she had how many
00:10:16.640 sexes that sexual encounters you know i'm saying like a virgin is always valuable so you can't say
00:10:23.360 that that's really bad because you can't just look at a girl and just think oh the only thing
00:10:27.360 that you've done before me is that is sexual do you get what i'm saying she could what if she slept
00:10:32.960 with 80 guys but it hasn't been in the last two years do you get what i'm saying that doesn't matter
00:10:38.560 that are you talking about to an extent that's all right to an extent okay let's just can we just
00:10:44.080 okay okay if it goes if you're your brother yeah if he has a choice between a girl that's a virgin or
00:10:49.040 slept with 80 people who would you tell him to pick i think it generally generally generally
00:10:55.200 same girl please don't say it depends that's what the women do it doesn't matter okay it generally
00:11:00.240 depends on how he feels if he loves the girl that's more of a virgin or loves the girl that
00:11:04.160 slept with me then that's the one he should go for what about what about when i give you the data and
00:11:08.640 i say hey he has an 80 chance of a happy marriage with girl a and he has a 20 chance of a happy marriage
00:11:14.480 with girl b does that switch your opinion or do you it doesn't because the statistic or some kind
00:11:19.440 of survey there's multiple studies so it's not it's not just one they've been done in different
00:11:23.280 like sometimes it differs by maybe 10 to wait by 10 to 15 but it's similar okay i think as you're aware
00:11:31.360 of yourself every relationship is different so i think to compare it or to judge i said the same the
00:11:37.520 same girls one girl has 80 one girl has zero who are you telling your brother to pick the one you care
00:11:42.240 about the one that he loves the most this is the problem in our generation like even when you
00:11:51.040 like when we're all talking about this stuff like relationships aren't about being happy
00:11:56.240 it's not about love like relationships are not about love it's about it's about building a family
00:12:01.440 and staying together it's not it's not about how can you build a relationship and a family without
00:12:07.280 love without people people do it all the time like the arranged marriages have great success
00:12:19.440 rates like it's actually really really high when you look at it and those are people that don't
00:12:23.600 even know each other like how does it like let's think about let's think about the results right now
00:12:28.960 we're in a society where we date before we were getting married and before before like a hundred years
00:12:34.400 ago people would date for like three weeks and then get married what has better results it's very
00:12:38.480 beautiful by the way yeah because they don't know any different that's right right right that's not
00:12:43.760 a bad thing because what they say comparison is the thief of joy so it's not a bad thing to not know
00:12:51.440 any different and being happy and i do admit you know being in with with a lot of guys it does damage
00:12:59.360 you thank you thank you it is poisonous thank you but i'm not saying that it's a bad thing and
00:13:04.160 i'm glad so actually i wanna i wanna so you said it does damage you yeah so you can understand why guys
00:13:10.560 wouldn't want to date girls that are damaged because it brings it brings problems into the relationship
00:13:16.880 so so even if you had a brother and he had two girls and one had 80 and one had zero if you loved him you
00:13:22.800 would tell him zero because you know what that does but one guy can do that to you though one guy can damage you
00:13:28.800 right but what okay so but if you have 80 what are the odds that it's more than one come on 80 you
00:13:35.280 didn't get five heartbreaks i feel like you feel different to every person though i feel like you
00:13:40.320 won't feel the same to all of the 80 men out of the 80 there might be two that you actually love right
00:13:46.960 but marriage shouldn't be about that it's about duty marriage marriage shouldn't be about love it's
00:13:52.080 about it's about a few things i don't think you can say marriages is just about one solid thing i
00:14:03.280 think it's about a few things mixed together and it all working simultaneously for it to actually like
00:14:09.360 work and have a successful marriage and also oh who do you think will be more loyal yeah yeah
00:14:14.560 yeah a girl that's of 80 bodies yeah let's say you have an argument yeah an argument a proper
00:14:18.400 argument yeah yeah so the 80 plus body girl yeah yeah or the virgin girl which one would rather go
00:14:24.160 off and like suck another dick because she's had so many times before yeah but you might be the one
00:14:28.640 that's going to change her you never know i don't think you need a guy to be the one i think through
00:14:34.960 her experience she can realize actually for my future and for what i want i want to change my life in
00:14:40.000 that way i generally think you cannot pick you can have a judgment on a girl being okay cool but
00:14:44.800 that's to you it don't have to be shared you don't have to be cool listen bro so cool so you'd rather
00:14:56.160 you're telling me you you'd rather get married to a girl that you apparently love you're probably
00:15:01.040 thinking about the situation too much listen i think it shows insecurity okay listen listen
00:15:06.400 who is this why do we why do we shame a guy it's like every time they have a standard guys girls
00:15:11.840 are allowed to want men that make money right he's allowed to want women that haven't slept with a
00:15:15.920 lot of people cool cool well let's say yeah let's say let's say yeah so you're telling me bro you'd
00:15:21.440 rather go with a girl that's had 80 plus bodies than a virgin that's fresh to you you're telling you
00:15:26.080 rather a girl with 80 plus 40. i think would you not mind if you as long as you love her this and
00:15:32.320 that is that what you're telling me bro no i think it it's not as black and white as that i just
00:15:36.960 generally don't think me what do you think me personally loving to go it isn't as black as
00:15:41.280 white as how many bodies you slept with it's just that's a simple all right cool i'll get married to
00:15:45.120 the virgin yeah yeah yeah listen listen listen bro listen listen bro you get listen you get married to
00:15:51.520 the virgin yeah that's had no other bodies before me jonathan yeah you get married to the girl yeah
00:15:58.560 80 plus body 80 guys she's had sex with bro yeah yeah you're telling me yeah after an argument she
00:16:05.120 won't go suck another dick after she breaks up listen listen my girl my girl wouldn't go suck
00:16:10.560 another dick asap after we break up okay your girl's used to sucking dick right because she's
00:16:24.160 had it 80 times before you jonathan she's had it 80 times before because like every time she's in
00:16:29.520 an argument with you she'll go suck another dick but me i've got a fresh version that's only her sex with
00:16:34.240 me she won't do that she'll stay at home easy as you know i'm saying cool so look you're telling me
00:16:38.960 body can't it doesn't matter right as long as you love her as long as you love her bro in the back
00:16:43.520 of your head when you're sleeping with her does it not come to your mind she's done this with 80
00:16:47.520 other girls bro but this is where i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna say security yeah i'm gonna say
00:16:52.720 you're constantly thinking about other guys sleeping with your girl it's not insecurity bro it's not