JustPearlyThings - Men Should AVOID These WOMEN

00:00:00.000 question for the men for the men um have you ever dated someone with bad spending habits

00:00:06.720 and is that something you look for and when you're considering taking someone seriously so let's

00:00:11.840 start on this this side of the room and go around uh yeah i think that a lot of what i'm hearing

00:00:17.680 right now is i'm obviously 35 years old so i've kind of been doing the 25 year old 26 27 all the

00:00:23.440 way to the point where i was like something's gonna give with this i used to go out i used

00:00:26.880 to do the cars the clothes the this the that um and i mean those girls that are chasing that sort

00:00:33.040 of stuff i mean it was it was fun for the while when we were doing it do you know i mean it was

00:00:37.360 those nights was crazy you were found you see my not they're doing that big yeah all right cool but

00:00:42.000 then when the lights come on and you're sitting at home with your hangover and your pockets are empty

00:00:46.800 you start going to yourself oh what the fuck did i do that for like you see what i'm saying so enough

00:00:51.360 of that and then also you start checking yourself and obviously for guys women can heavily influence

00:00:56.400 that like going out of your home you're just splitting bills everybody's buying balls everybody's

00:00:59.920 doing their thing but when you have pretty girls especially pretty girls or other guys in the club

00:01:03.600 who are flashing cash or trying to attract as well you know it's it's fucking tiring man and i think

00:01:09.600 that a lot of people even a lot of guys who make a lot of money will turn around and would say that

00:01:13.360 they would prefer to have somebody that they could take that money with and go on holiday or or buy

00:01:18.560 things for their house or there's so many other ways and other places to spend that sort of cash so

00:01:23.120 i had to knock that one on the head um me and my girlfriend like to cook more now bottle of wine

00:01:29.920 nice movie do you know what i mean and it's cool i wake up saturday morning i'm like ah i'm alive you

00:01:36.400 know okay what about you the spending habit something you look at um when looking at a girl for a

00:01:42.720 relationship so i was predominantly raised by my mom so i feel like i always i'm not i don't i'm not saying

00:01:50.400 it's a good thing but i always look at my mom's example and what she did and what she does in

00:01:55.840 terms of her example and sets for me and i always think okay if i got into this situation or did go

00:02:04.240 into relationship and your spending habits were like this would i would i like the example you set

00:02:11.600 safe for anything if we were to have children if we were to do anything would i think hmm my mom would

00:02:17.760 approve of you she'd say to me oh yeah you're so lucky to have someone that does this or would she

00:02:22.800 look at me a bit like what what red flags will you look for red flags yeah like what is there a certain

00:02:30.320 lifestyle of girls living that you're just like so for in yeah like for me it'll be if you look at the

00:02:36.880 next person too much if you see someone's wearing this kind of designer and you want it and it's like

00:02:44.240 you follow by example you're not a leader and that's just in terms of i want someone that is

00:02:50.880 a leader you know what you want and it's not because someone else is showing you it's because

00:02:55.120 you're like i'm a visionary i'm gonna set the example and i feel like i always look for are you

00:03:03.200 leading by example are you being a sheep i'm following because your friends see something and

00:03:07.040 they're like oh i want this this balenciaga bag so i want this and i'm gonna spend it on this and then

00:03:12.160 you're like you know what rent's a bit tight this month i can't pay it and you're like why so i feel

00:03:18.480 like i always look to the example of would like in my head it's always would my mom approve of you

00:03:25.360 would mom look at me and be like i'm so proud of what you're doing and the person you chose is your

00:03:32.160 life partner because if it's not then it's like you can't stay and obviously i feel like people always

00:03:38.560 change so it's like you never know at the start it could start off really good and you could be like

00:03:43.520 wow like you're so amazing you're literally everything i imagined but then obviously

00:03:48.400 everything's a facade sometimes when you get into relationship at the start it's always people are

00:03:52.080 going to present their best selves like we can all argue you can get into relationship and everyone's

00:03:56.240 going to show they're a money man they're a money girl they're about their business and then you can

00:04:00.560 get six months one year three years into a relationship and then they'll turn around and be like

00:04:05.680 like you'll see the real them it's not even them showing you it'll be it all begins to fade

00:04:10.160 naturally and then i feel like it's always you kind of see everything for yourself and i feel that

00:04:16.640 it's always important to if you see a red flag you need to leave even if it's and i'm not saying

00:04:22.080 straight away you're like oh red flag let me jump out and run away now it's like if it can if it

00:04:28.160 happens continuously you either bring it up or you leave and i feel that a lot of people in our

00:04:33.360 generation they might decide to stay and they will look at that red flag ignore it and then you're

00:04:40.080 always just going to be in a cycle and i feel that that's what past generations have done you've seen

00:04:44.480 a cycle you've been brought up in an atmosphere where it's always been well if you see a red flag

00:04:50.480 it's fine because you always look at ah they bring money to the table and i feel that we always need to

00:04:55.760 in this generation ignore red flags like not ignore red flags we need to address them i feel that it's always

00:05:02.320 important to address something that is bothering us because in past generations they'll tell you

00:05:06.160 yeah we've been married for 65 years and then you're like okay so what red flags were brought up

00:05:12.560 and you chose to ignore because i feel like that's always an important question to him like

00:05:21.360 i feel like that's always an important question to address and i feel like oh it's more among the like

00:05:26.240 the younger kind of generation is like we will the younger generation will start jobs quit them and

00:05:34.560 be like it's not what i want and i feel like the older generation are always the ones telling you

00:05:39.200 oh we need to stick it out we need to you need to be you can work in like sainsbury's and they'll be

00:05:44.960 like you need to stack them shelves you need to be like one of the best and you need to stay at the job

00:05:49.120 and do this and that and then the younger generation will be like nah i will skip this yeah yeah so what about you

00:05:54.720 spending habits have you ever um passed over a girl for spending because she has bad spending habits

00:06:00.560 yeah i mean i mean i've had experiences of that i'm staying away from that never going back to that

00:06:06.960 just because i think that someone that has a bad spending habit and relies on you to to to support that

00:06:16.560 it's like a uh a sinking ship do you know what i mean what what was your experience with that

00:06:23.440 well oh she just wanted you to pay for everything no i don't mind pay for i've never gone on a date

00:06:28.960 where a lady i've split the bill before in my life it's just not the way i was what about when girls

00:06:33.360 say um you can't afford me oh god i run i run i run like i literally run safe let me know like i

00:06:41.840 really literally just run away from those kind of women there is a tick tock i saw where it was like

00:06:47.040 the girl and the guy it was like two ups workers and the girl was like you can't afford me and he's

00:06:51.680 like we have the same job i don't know it's funny but sorry go ahead no no it's always the way they

00:06:59.120 try to make you feel less than a man because of of whatever you can't take them to buy them whatever

00:07:04.800 fancy bag or like you know take them to a proper nightclub or something like that and i walked in

00:07:09.440 in like nightlife for like 10 years and i saw the sort of this sort of facade if a girl is really about

00:07:15.840 money then she can be easily bought that's my opinion she can be easily bought by a

00:07:21.520 next person so if you even spending a couple dropping a couple of bags on her it just all

00:07:26.080 it takes is a no is a bigger man to come and he'll take her so she was never yours it was just your turn

00:07:36.800 what the men in the swim like what would you define as a a bad spending habit in your opinion

00:07:42.880 uh someone who doesn't have that you have priorities do you see i'm saying oh is my rent paid is my bills

00:07:49.600 paid is everything that i need to carry on this month sorted out before i go off and buy lavish

00:07:56.720 uh nights out with my girls or uh shoes or clothes or do you know what i mean yes like having your

00:08:02.320 priorities in order first yeah opposed to having it the other way around so let's just say those

00:08:07.360 priorities are in order for a particular woman but she still expects certain things from you

00:08:12.480 mm-hmm are you now what are these certain things you have to specify i don't know like just to say

00:08:17.440 she wants to go out to a certain restaurant and she expects you to pay for that okay well what has

00:08:22.560 what has she done in the relationship to say that i so it requires her to be a certain status in the

00:08:28.640 relationship absolutely so you're down for it just depends on well if if for example i only see you on

00:08:34.320 the weekends and you bring nothing really to my life except for you getting done up and wanting to go

00:08:38.320 out to fancy restaurants that's a no you know if you're somebody who who if you know what i'm doing

00:08:44.080 and you know what i'm about because you spend that sort of time with me and i tell you about my business

00:08:48.400 and you go oh you know what i might know somebody or how can i help or whatever whatever you deserve

00:08:52.960 those nights out not just oh i got my down girl i'm gonna take him you're gonna make him take me out

00:08:57.440 that's a no i hear what you're saying yeah my brothers um they like won't date girls if they feel like

00:09:04.960 their lifestyle is too expensive my brothers they all make six figures and they can they can afford

00:09:09.440 like they could afford a lot for a woman but like if a girl comes in expecting of them to pay for all

00:09:16.080 their shit and like i don't know they just won't it's just too much of a headache i can't afford you

00:09:22.560 potential holes as a man potential holes in this in your in your boat if you're a man and the ship

00:09:27.920 represents you those are those are holes because what you think what you have to look at is in long term

00:09:33.280 about how that woman is exactly you know how like if she's like that and she's moved especially

00:09:38.560 through social media yeah she's really like you know socially conditioned to move by what

00:09:44.480 was going on in social media she's going to put holes in your sheet or imagine i would say yeah

00:09:51.920 i feel like it's harder to maintain financial kind of like expectation then like emotional and like

00:10:00.080 everything so if you go into relationship the kind of emotional expectation you expect you

00:10:06.640 you know it's coming you know sometimes women will expect a certain thing but if you're making

00:10:11.600 a certain amount of money and women are like ah we need to go on dates and you need to pay for

00:10:15.040 everything i want this bag i want this like i want this hill i want this and then you're going

00:10:19.520 to look at it like it's a bit much and it's like can i say something yes wait wait no go ahead what'd

00:10:27.120 you say me yeah yeah no i'm just like hearing these scenarios and i would never go in to a

00:10:33.200 relationship with these types of expectations so i maybe it's an i mean so i'm i mean i'm just as

00:10:38.960 like a genuine quick i'm i'm in receiving mode like i'm taking it all in like i actually never really

00:10:43.600 think to ask my guy friends these things so this is interesting to hear a guy's perspective

00:10:47.040 but are women saying these things to y'all so a certain type yes

00:10:53.200 but you know everything that we've said has been generalized yeah and this is and i think that

00:10:58.160 this is the thing it's it's a huge it's a huge um character trait of of women in america especially

00:11:03.360 i mean this is where it's all popularized from the music the the hip-hop lifestyle all the sort of

00:11:08.160 all the sort of uh icons i'll give you an example so i a lot most of the times when i ask girls how

00:11:15.280 much they want a guy to make that they would take seriously it it's typically more than what they

00:11:20.720 make well i would prefer to date someone that made at least what i make preferably more but like i

00:11:27.600 would probably fit into that category but i don't speak to men that way i don't have those types of

00:11:32.640 expectations yeah but the problem is like um like what do you make over 75 000 yes over 100. not not

00:11:40.080 anymore okay i had to take a pay cut to come to the uk roughly 100 like maybe in the us i made over

00:11:46.400 100 and that was like six months ago so 100 that's top 10 guy but that's what i'm making no and that's

00:11:52.800 and that's fine but men don't care about your money so that it's like nothing it's kind of like if a

00:11:56.800 guy tells us he has a shoe collection it's kind of cool but we're not like attracted to it we're like

00:12:01.600 yes it's okay i mean i mean i don't know i i mean i understand your perspective and i'm not saying

00:12:07.200 that you're wrong but like kind of going back i'm sorry i don't remember your name but kyra kyra what

00:12:13.200 he was saying earlier about this generation like we were being cognizant of building generational wealth

00:12:19.040 like the conversations i'm having with my friends like my peers my friends who make over six figures

00:12:24.640 like my male and female friends like we are thinking about like all the things that he talked about

00:12:30.080 that's the comp those are types of conversations we're having we're talking about who we're what

00:12:34.160 we're investing in what stocks like that's like what's happening within my social circles so like

00:12:40.160 the problem the problem is women women talk about it but like the data doesn't stack up women's

00:12:44.720 how much more you think a woman spends in a lifetime than a man even though we make less yeah

00:12:48.640 i'm sure we like i'm not arguing with like whether or not we spend like that's not what i'm talking

00:12:53.280 about but what i am saying is that you said that men don't care about what women how much you make and

00:12:58.160 i'm saying at least within my social circles i haven't found that to be the case because

00:13:02.880 men that i have communicated with men that i've chatted to guys i've dated especially black men

00:13:08.160 like we want to build generational wealth like we've seen we've experienced what happens when

00:13:12.960 that is not the forefront of the of like the relationship so we talk about goals like financial

00:13:19.120 goals that we have like together like i so i at least that's what i've converse so like when i have

00:13:24.640 those those types of standards or wants i should say although i would like for a guy to make at

00:13:29.600 least what i make um so i'm i'm curious um the guys that you're talking to are they your friends

00:13:36.000 yeah yeah and and you make a good amount of money yeah i mean not again i took a pay cut to come

00:13:41.920 to the uk so they're probably trying to sleep with you i have platonic mail so as many of you know i

00:13:53.200 was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want to

00:14:01.040 help please consider sending a super thanks below every donation helps and it helps make what we do

00:14:07.760 possible

JustPearlyThings - December 26, 2022

Men Should AVOID These WOMEN

Episode Stats

Length

Words per Minute

Word Count

Sentence Count

Summary

Transcript