JustPearlyThings - June 10, 2023


Pearl And Millionaire DEBATE Boss Babe


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

217.2786

Word Count

2,235

Sentence Count

256


Summary

In this episode, the guys talk about what it means to be a successful man and why it s important for a woman to be the breadwinner in a marriage. Do you think successful men want their wives to work or do you think they should share chores equally?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Surprisingly, studies showed that the divorce rate among couples who share chores equally was 50% higher than among those where the wife does the majority of the work.
00:00:09.920 It's a financial thing.
00:00:10.920 Yeah, I know, but I'm not saying because the man doesn't do it.
00:00:15.860 Because obviously the woman for nature, even in other religions, the woman is the one that she looks after the kids, after the house and everything.
00:00:23.320 But at the same time, if a man can make that type of amount of money that he can come home and chill, then why her wife should go to work and be like, oh, I have to take care of everything.
00:00:35.640 If her wife can decide to be at home and be like, oh, I don't want to have a really big career.
00:00:40.120 Do you think that successful men want their wives to work?
00:00:42.720 Does your wife?
00:00:44.240 No, I told her when I married her.
00:00:46.220 I said, my mom worked.
00:00:47.840 My mom out on my dad.
00:00:48.800 So my parents got divorced.
00:00:50.140 And I saw it as a kid.
00:00:51.520 I wasn't a dumb kid.
00:00:52.280 I'm like, I know why it's happening because my mom started out earning my dad.
00:00:55.420 I told my wife, I'm like, look, when we get married, I want my wife to be a stay-at-home mom.
00:00:59.840 I was very open about it.
00:01:00.720 Why?
00:01:01.320 Because I want my kids to have an experience I didn't have.
00:01:03.640 And I want to work my ass off to provide my kids that experience.
00:01:06.960 Okay, can I just put that in there?
00:01:08.420 The last guy I was hit with, even though he wanted me to have this and have that, he wanted me to do all of that.
00:01:14.360 He did not want me to stay at home and raise kids.
00:01:17.660 He wanted me to go to work.
00:01:19.180 And I thought, well, listen, if you're the breadwinner and you're the alpha, why would you want to put so much pressure on me?
00:01:25.680 He ain't no alpha, Gail.
00:01:26.860 He ain't no alpha.
00:01:27.660 I wanted to have to engage you.
00:01:29.280 Wait, wait, go ahead.
00:01:30.520 One thing, guys.
00:01:32.000 So this is a topic that's come up here.
00:01:33.860 And so you're like, look, let's imagine we group men into two groups.
00:01:37.960 Some men are slimy and they just have bad character and they mistreat you.
00:01:45.100 And maybe some of us were unfortunate enough to grow up with a father like that.
00:01:49.500 I just want to give a shout out to my dad, by the way, who never made a lot of money in his life.
00:01:53.120 He's still a mechanic to this day.
00:01:54.740 He's in his 60s.
00:01:55.540 He's never going to retire.
00:01:56.880 But man, did he give me a good example of a man who suffers indignity.
00:01:59.940 My God, he suffers indignity.
00:02:01.680 And I know he fucking hates it.
00:02:03.240 Pardon my French.
00:02:04.320 But he suffered indignity for me because, you know, he had a son, me.
00:02:08.920 So we can group the men into these two categories, the slime balls.
00:02:11.900 And then we have guys that like genuinely want an optimal outcome for their family.
00:02:15.500 Pearl, I think your dad sounds like he might be that kind of guy.
00:02:17.740 Are there any other, by the way, folks here with a guy with a dad like that?
00:02:21.240 Oh, my goodness.
00:02:22.040 So about 50 percent.
00:02:23.140 You can see 50 percent.
00:02:24.240 Okay.
00:02:24.960 So and this is a painful question to ask.
00:02:27.720 But I would ask this question because if I'm coaching a young man or woman in our company,
00:02:31.140 and they're continuously getting a negative outcome, I would ask, well, if 50 percent of the guys are the good guys,
00:02:37.580 why aren't they picking you?
00:02:39.400 Like, why are you being picked by these guys that are problematic guys?
00:02:42.440 Because that's the experience you're describing.
00:02:44.160 What about the good guys exist and they're picking somebody.
00:02:46.800 We exist.
00:02:47.660 Maybe why are they picking you?
00:02:49.040 Maybe them slime balls know who to pre on.
00:02:51.800 And they just see it.
00:02:52.900 So why are you such a juicy target for that?
00:02:55.480 And why?
00:02:55.940 Why?
00:02:56.640 Why are you going for it?
00:02:58.580 Well, guys, because of my personality.
00:03:02.460 This is my issue.
00:03:04.680 It's like, okay, once I'll give you one.
00:03:07.200 All right.
00:03:07.360 But it's like girls will pick two, three, four.
00:03:09.540 Like at some point it's a pattern.
00:03:10.920 At some point it's you.
00:03:11.840 Because men can be very deceiving in the beginning.
00:03:14.280 They can be lovely.
00:03:15.640 They can be kind.
00:03:16.940 No, no, no.
00:03:17.840 That's the men you pick.
00:03:20.140 That's half the men.
00:03:20.800 That's that.
00:03:21.220 Until you get to know them.
00:03:22.880 Give it three months, six months down the line.
00:03:24.820 Then we start giving them conversations.
00:03:26.520 Shall we have the kids?
00:03:27.660 Shall we move in?
00:03:28.600 Do you want to do that?
00:03:29.880 Yeah, of course.
00:03:30.700 So we're speaking about life.
00:03:32.020 We're not trying to waste time.
00:03:33.240 Are you a good judge of character?
00:03:34.260 Over in or out.
00:03:35.420 Are you a good judge of character?
00:03:37.120 I think so.
00:03:38.660 Well, that doesn't sound like it.
00:03:40.080 No, it is.
00:03:41.060 Because at the end of the day, if you come across a good man,
00:03:44.200 he's hardworking, he's very dedicated to his own game,
00:03:47.720 he's alpha male, and da-da-da-da-da, you know?
00:03:50.580 You're going to give him that time of day
00:03:52.320 because you think, oh, I like this energy.
00:03:54.340 I like this man.
00:03:55.280 So where's that man in your life?
00:03:56.220 He's giving me, me, I have so many to pick from
00:03:59.220 and I haven't chose yet.
00:04:00.900 Yeah.
00:04:01.180 Okay.
00:04:01.440 I have many that I can actually say,
00:04:03.960 I can settle down with you, Cap.
00:04:07.580 No, no, no, babe, real.
00:04:09.240 I can show you my taxes.
00:04:10.620 I'm not talking about texts.
00:04:12.100 I'm just saying any girl.
00:04:13.020 I will never, I will never, I will never Cap.
00:04:14.360 It's not just you, it's just, listen, listen, listen, listen.
00:04:16.140 I have options.
00:04:16.600 I'll be here.
00:04:17.560 And I can say.
00:04:18.200 It's any girl, if you're single,
00:04:20.300 the guys, if you're single,
00:04:22.240 it's like, then you're not,
00:04:23.180 the guys you want don't want you.
00:04:24.540 I'm on the journey.
00:04:25.260 I want to be a multi-millionaire, so no.
00:04:28.000 If you're single, it's, oh, come on.
00:04:30.000 If a guy, if a guy really you thought
00:04:31.600 was taking you serious and checked all your boxes,
00:04:33.720 you'd go for it.
00:04:34.420 Any woman would.
00:04:35.260 Yeah, but I'm a picky person.
00:04:36.660 But that's my point.
00:04:38.820 I'm a picky person.
00:04:39.460 That goes back to my point, though,
00:04:41.400 because the men that are going for you
00:04:43.140 don't live up to your standards.
00:04:44.400 So either your standards are too high
00:04:45.900 or the men aren't going for you.
00:04:47.240 There's one particular person,
00:04:48.860 and I'm like, wow, you really did do that.
00:04:51.840 Like, he really, and I'm really shocked,
00:04:53.600 and I'm really proud of the man he's become.
00:04:55.780 And I've known him for many years.
00:04:57.500 And, you know, we could have been in a relationship,
00:04:59.760 say, 15 years ago.
00:05:01.200 But I was like, no, I've come to London,
00:05:03.400 and I'm on a journey,
00:05:04.800 and I don't want to be distracted by these guys.
00:05:07.000 Because guess what?
00:05:07.860 They're going to give a baby to you.
00:05:10.240 So you misjudge a character.
00:05:12.380 No, not necessarily.
00:05:14.020 Of course you do.
00:05:14.560 I'm on a journey.
00:05:15.940 How can I be judging characters when I'm on a journey?
00:05:18.420 I have a question.
00:05:19.160 You said you have kids.
00:05:20.800 No, I don't.
00:05:21.240 You have kids, and you said you're 39.
00:05:22.740 Yes.
00:05:23.160 Do you want kids?
00:05:24.460 With the right person.
00:05:25.900 If I don't, I have many nieces and nephews.
00:05:28.700 Okay.
00:05:29.240 I've got a big family.
00:05:30.520 But it goes back to,
00:05:32.180 you haven't found the right person to have kids with.
00:05:34.620 So, again, again, again, right.
00:05:37.920 So there's a misconnect there.
00:05:40.740 There has been right people.
00:05:42.440 Wait, wait.
00:05:43.200 So it's either your standards are too high.
00:05:46.280 Very high.
00:05:46.880 You don't know how to pick.
00:05:48.660 And maybe you don't have a good judge of character.
00:05:51.020 Or the men that you want don't want you.
00:05:52.580 It's one of the three.
00:05:53.560 Like, there has to be.
00:05:54.500 If you're single, there's a disconnect.
00:05:55.460 Maybe the guys who I wanted,
00:05:56.840 they probably don't want me no more
00:05:58.760 because we're in a different category.
00:06:01.840 He's far away.
00:06:03.340 I would have to move to his location
00:06:05.860 and da-da-da-da-da.
00:06:07.200 And then the ones in England,
00:06:09.600 I don't know.
00:06:10.240 They're just fine.
00:06:10.820 But do you know,
00:06:11.460 I work it for me.
00:06:12.540 They're not that homely.
00:06:13.340 You've been dating since, what?
00:06:15.640 You're 18, 16.
00:06:17.200 So in 20 years,
00:06:18.240 you're the only common denominator.
00:06:19.900 It can't be all the men.
00:06:20.980 It's you.
00:06:22.840 It's not me, though.
00:06:24.300 Because if I have some guys that are ready
00:06:28.340 and waiting for me to say yes,
00:06:31.400 do you know what I mean?
00:06:33.080 That's just my choice.
00:06:34.020 But do you know,
00:06:34.360 it's...
00:06:35.180 Okay, it might be your life choices.
00:06:36.900 It is.
00:06:37.260 It might be,
00:06:37.840 but it goes back to,
00:06:39.060 you're the common denominator.
00:06:40.300 Just like my outcomes,
00:06:41.920 it's my fault.
00:06:43.420 Everyone's own outcomes
00:06:44.420 are their own fault.
00:06:45.400 It's choices, though.
00:06:46.780 Hey, can I give...
00:06:47.600 It's choices.
00:06:47.920 I really think it's the energy
00:06:49.520 that she's putting that
00:06:50.540 because you're in your place
00:06:53.340 where you want to go high up in life.
00:06:54.940 You're also not giving those energy
00:06:56.620 to those men.
00:06:57.260 That's why things ain't happening as well.
00:06:58.780 That's what I'm listening.
00:06:59.440 I can't waste time.
00:07:00.720 Guys, I'm going to do
00:07:02.160 a little business thing here.
00:07:03.320 You said you want to be a multi-millionaire,
00:07:04.660 be super successful, right?
00:07:05.700 Yeah.
00:07:06.020 I'm going to give you...
00:07:06.760 I'm about to make you
00:07:07.620 a multi-frickin' millionaire.
00:07:08.800 You ready for this?
00:07:09.460 Go on.
00:07:09.720 Start a cat food company
00:07:10.840 and call your friends.
00:07:11.980 You will make millions.
00:07:13.460 No, I don't have friends like that.
00:07:15.300 No, I'm sorry.
00:07:15.940 You might make commence
00:07:18.060 but that's not my full time.
00:07:19.720 So you're 39.
00:07:20.080 When are you going to be a millionaire by?
00:07:22.280 Well, there's no time plan
00:07:23.960 but we're working on the journey.
00:07:25.220 Okay, so...
00:07:25.780 We're doing everything possible
00:07:27.340 to make it happen.
00:07:28.040 Do you have over half a million saved?
00:07:29.940 No, I've got some money saved, though.
00:07:31.920 Okay, so...
00:07:32.640 But it's like when?
00:07:33.980 You've had 20 years to do it.
00:07:35.560 I mean, it's not about when.
00:07:37.800 You know what?
00:07:38.380 It is about when
00:07:39.240 and it's also about who we...
00:07:41.540 Because if I have such a high mentality,
00:07:44.120 I need somebody to match that mentality to me.
00:07:47.120 What do you mean?
00:07:47.220 Okay, so...
00:07:47.900 And they can't bring me down.
00:07:49.260 So at the rate I'm at, I'm 26.
00:07:51.940 Okay, I'm 26.
00:07:52.820 I probably will be a millionaire
00:07:54.280 in the next five years.
00:07:55.960 Go girl.
00:07:56.560 No, no, no.
00:07:56.980 It's not even like that.
00:07:57.940 But I'm saying like...
00:07:58.740 No, no.
00:07:58.760 On your journey.
00:07:59.680 But I could tell you
00:08:01.020 I didn't need anyone else to help me do it.
00:08:03.160 Good.
00:08:03.460 I just did it.
00:08:04.460 And it's like...
00:08:06.760 If you're 39
00:08:07.980 and you're not on the actual path
00:08:09.780 to being a millionaire...
00:08:10.920 I wasn't able to get on my path
00:08:12.740 until I was 26.
00:08:13.760 But my whole point...
00:08:15.440 So it's still been 15 years.
00:08:17.400 That I had to come
00:08:18.800 and move from a different city.
00:08:21.760 No, let me give you the statistics.
00:08:23.200 I had to move from a different city.
00:08:25.080 Okay?
00:08:25.620 I had to start fresh again.
00:08:27.560 Okay?
00:08:28.120 Came here with nothing,
00:08:29.400 with nobody.
00:08:30.500 Yeah?
00:08:30.880 Had to start from fresh.
00:08:31.940 I did that a year ago.
00:08:32.940 You did that a year ago.
00:08:34.200 A year ago.
00:08:34.520 Maybe you had a bit more supportive parents.
00:08:36.740 I don't have supportive parents.
00:08:38.400 My dad has passed away
00:08:39.680 and my mom,
00:08:40.800 she's a single mom.
00:08:41.620 So no,
00:08:42.520 I can't look to my family for anything.
00:08:44.420 So everything is all by myself.
00:08:47.420 Which is fine.
00:08:48.640 You know what I mean?
00:08:49.220 You can phone your dad
00:08:50.580 and say,
00:08:51.180 Dad,
00:08:51.620 what a story.
00:08:52.340 I've got a problem.
00:08:54.260 I can't phone nobody.
00:08:55.640 I have to work it out
00:08:57.820 and figure it out for myself.
00:08:58.960 But you still have that.
00:08:59.440 If it's going to take me 15 years.
00:09:01.100 You still have that same problem.
00:09:03.280 And that's what I'm saying.
00:09:04.000 Babe,
00:09:04.360 I am changing every day.
00:09:06.240 And every day,
00:09:07.120 I'm getting better and better.
00:09:09.140 And that's what I do know.
00:09:10.640 To who?
00:09:11.040 For me.
00:09:11.780 It's not about pleasing anybody though.
00:09:14.540 It's not.
00:09:15.200 It's about pleasing yourself.
00:09:16.240 If you're going to be a millionaire,
00:09:17.740 and this is,
00:09:18.520 like,
00:09:18.740 this just sounds delusional.
00:09:19.320 That is a dream.
00:09:20.220 It's a dream.
00:09:21.020 It's just,
00:09:21.360 it's a dream.
00:09:22.100 And we're working towards it.
00:09:24.140 How?
00:09:25.220 I do properties.
00:09:26.240 You didn't ask me my life story.
00:09:27.840 I do properties.
00:09:28.880 I do acting.
00:09:30.300 I do music.
00:09:31.300 I'm all on intellectual property.
00:09:33.720 Intellectual property takes time.
00:09:35.800 Then,
00:09:36.240 your property games
00:09:37.820 take time as well.
00:09:39.220 You know what I mean?
00:09:39.980 I've been working on properties
00:09:41.160 since 2017.
00:09:42.660 I didn't leave school
00:09:43.740 with any JCSEs
00:09:44.860 and I've just finished university
00:09:46.380 four weeks ago.
00:09:47.420 So I had to go through that journey
00:09:49.260 of becoming intellectual
00:09:50.820 for me to go on these journeys.
00:09:53.120 Do you think you're still
00:09:53.880 going to have the type of energy
00:09:55.080 you had in your 20s,
00:09:56.280 in your 40s and 50s?
00:09:58.100 Maybe not,
00:09:58.920 but guess what?
00:09:59.680 We're going to keep on going.
00:10:00.760 But you're going to be competing
00:10:01.780 with the people in their 20s
00:10:03.420 and their 30s.
00:10:04.540 No competition.
00:10:05.800 There's no competition.
00:10:06.980 It is.
00:10:07.360 Because if you,
00:10:08.140 I'm telling you.
00:10:08.640 It isn't for you,
00:10:09.540 but there is a competition.
00:10:10.560 There is a competition,
00:10:12.100 but I can't look on that.
00:10:13.260 I promise you that business
00:10:14.780 is absolutely a competition.
00:10:16.280 Oh my God.
00:10:16.760 Good.