JustPearlyThings - October 30, 2023


She DEFENDED Her Delusion with Everything


Episode Stats

Length

41 minutes

Words per Minute

197.21019

Word Count

8,167

Sentence Count

78


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 But if you don't want to deal with that baggage, then don't date them and you know, but he's saying he doesn't because that's baggage to him
00:00:06.700 And I think he should be it like allowed to say that
00:00:09.140 Yeah, he can say that and remember men have baggage too. Let me tell you the baggage that men carry
00:00:14.280 You always like you always you always do this whenever we say something about women
00:00:18.660 We always have to say something about men. We do because we have to be fair
00:00:21.560 Why? We have to be fair because a man though all that they get there's two things that happen
00:00:25.680 We talk about, Deneva, we talk about men's baggage all the time
00:00:28.620 Which baggage is it that men have then?
00:00:31.620 My way that we talk about because I don't really hear them
00:00:33.860 What are you talking about in the media all the time? Why is men are trash? Why is that a common?
00:00:38.020 No, that's not baggage. That's that's a judgment the baggage that men carry if they're older they get as well means they either
00:00:43.600 Been incels for longer or they've fucked around for longer
00:00:47.000 So those two bring two problems either you're going to be insecure and think that you cannot trust any woman because you've been with too many three or fours or
00:00:53.860 You're going to be very insecure in yourself in your manly hood because you've not had enough experience
00:00:58.460 Some men have the insecurities and they have their baggage
00:01:00.580 That's why you'd rather be with somebody that's somewhat on your level because it's easier for both of you to carry the same
00:01:05.700 I agree with you
00:01:13.460 Some men have baggage some women have baggage but I'm saying men and we're like like men and women don't look at children the same and you can't change reality
00:01:21.240 It just is what it is. Yeah, like like I've heard guys say they get more girls after they have kids
00:01:26.760 I've never heard a single mother say her her dating options got better after a child. I've never heard that
00:01:32.820 Like I heard I've heard guys say they brought their kid to the park because they know the girls would like, you know
00:01:39.360 Men don't want to have to spread their resources to kids done
00:01:42.780 And it's also like they have a lot of risk that comes with that like they have to invest in a kid
00:01:47.460 That's not theirs and I don't know if you have kids and I don't know you know how old the kids are
00:01:52.180 But especially if they're young they could raise a kid for 10 years and have no legal rights to that child at the end of it
00:01:57.000 They've got they've got options if they want to be an involved in the child's life
00:02:01.020 Obviously, it's a man's choice if they want to be that involved and have rights
00:02:04.920 They they can legally adopt and give their name to that child or they are just the
00:02:10.800 Woman's partner who has kids in their life right and they can and I think I think if more women would do that
00:02:17.060 I thought that would help well, but I don't think that's typical with a lot of single mothers
00:02:22.340 And it's not that's not what I've gathered because because you ask them like can can the dad discipline the kid as his own?
00:02:27.940 So if you disagree with like he spanks your kid you disagree with it
00:02:31.180 Would you let him do it and a lot of single mothers say no to that question
00:02:34.460 But there are a lot more single mothers than single dads
00:02:37.620 Right because the court system doesn't allow a lot of men to see their children
00:02:41.720 I mean women win custody 90% of the time and
00:02:44.640 And there's a lot of guys that get screwed in court and don't get access to their children leave kids a lot more
00:02:50.420 I think
00:02:51.840 Can I just interject on that one?
00:02:55.400 Obviously, there's statistics on that, but there's also
00:02:59.680 There's a big community of men that don't have access to their children and they're not being recognized
00:03:04.840 Right and there's a thing where you hear this a lot you hear this a lot, but it's like
00:03:07.960 There are there are stories of children that were led to believe by their mothers that their father left them and there's somehow at the blue
00:03:16.200 I have a personal friend of mine for example
00:03:18.840 who was able to
00:03:21.320 Regain contact with his father after like 25 years or something or 10 or 15 years or minus his childhood
00:03:27.720 via my LinkedIn and then found out that it was actually his mother
00:03:32.760 That pushed him away, but he was indoctrinated with the belief that he was abandoned by his father
00:03:37.080 So it's just like whenever I had these these kind of things. I'm not necessarily saying that not not all men are amazing fathers and stuff
00:03:43.560 but there's a lot of men out here that don't have a voice and
00:03:47.240 All the focus is on the women's side of things particular things particularly single fathers because
00:03:52.040 I have personal experience of co-parenting right and
00:03:58.440 I'm not not not I try not to like make too much of a comparison between men and women but from personal experience
00:04:06.360 Women have many advantages that single fathers would dream of having
00:04:11.240 Something as basic as picking up your child from nursery and having to be interrogated because you're seen as a threat because you're around little children
00:04:19.000 Every single day for the next 15 to 13 years all these kind of things all add up
00:04:22.840 So I'm just saying that there's there's more to it than that than just like
00:04:26.280 Yeah, and I agree with you to an extent because um
00:04:28.760 Incarceration like mass incarceration in america is mainly men
00:04:32.040 So a lot more women are forced to be single mothers
00:04:35.240 Yeah, so I agree with you. I'm just saying from society most men in the room right. Yeah
00:04:40.600 When you go into a place that has lots of little children, what do you do like what's your first response?
00:04:45.480 Well, I'm distancing myself as much as possible. Do you know what I'm saying?
00:04:47.720 Yeah, and then can you imagine being that child that man with a child?
00:04:51.720 It's like it's a it's a really really challenging dynamic
00:04:54.360 Because men are portrayed as like predators way more often that it would be kind of scary because you don't want to be seen like that
00:05:00.520 Like you like you want to be like loving but you also feel restricted by how society views you
00:05:05.480 Yeah, and and I'd like to say too in the you in the us of there the women
00:05:10.040 Are incentivized to take away the kids from the dad because they're paid more um if the if the dad doesn't see the kids
00:05:17.080 They're given more money from child support, so they're literally paid to take away the kids from the dad
00:05:24.280 Um
00:05:25.720 Well, I agree with that
00:05:26.600 I just have to say ladies if you're doing that
00:05:28.680 That's terrible because having a man that is willing to be in your child's life is a blessing
00:05:33.400 If he's willing to do the right work if you're if you're sleeping you're sleeping and that's your fault
00:05:37.640 As much as I champion my sisters, and I always want to protect women
00:05:41.160 I do know that when it comes to the relationship between
00:05:44.840 parent and child
00:05:46.440 That's something that you really shouldn't play with and you shouldn't use that to your advantage or to for power or for financial gain for whatever
00:05:52.600 It is you're going to hell for that because it's your child that's yeah
00:05:55.960 And taking off that point that's why I wouldn't date a really older guy because if he had kids
00:06:01.080 Or if I wanted to have kids when I was like when I was my age they wouldn't be there for me
00:06:05.560 They couldn't be a father figure because they would die a lot
00:06:08.440 Earlier than I would and then I would be left with the responsibilities. That's actually what my dad says with dating older guys
00:06:14.920 He says
00:06:16.040 My dad says you should date someone younger as a girl
00:06:18.440 Which is like the opposite of red pill because he says women live longer. Yeah, that's like a logical guy just logistics
00:06:25.720 um
00:06:27.720 Yeah, the
00:06:29.720 I thought we would die the same age roughly. Yeah
00:06:33.080 I don't know. I didn't think that far
00:06:35.960 Um, let's do the actual mia khalifa video. I found the actual one. I wanted to show you guys
00:06:44.040 I hope I hope to god this is it you got to start it from the beginning blessing
00:06:51.000 Oh, okay, well
00:06:53.000 Any guy
00:06:57.880 Who goes after a girl significantly younger than them is severely lacking in their life and I I mean that
00:07:07.160 Confidence wise I mean like they are falling short in so many places that that is the only
00:07:13.000 Place they can turn to to feel like they have they have something on the scale of power
00:07:18.600 And it's I mean ultimately it's predatory
00:07:20.920 I mean, there's just no way to kind of because you're manipulating someone who does is not aware of what they're giving you and it's unfair
00:07:31.320 So my question is why are men called predators for going for younger women
00:07:36.040 But women don't typically have that same energy for women that go for younger men
00:07:42.280 I don't know exciting older women are also predators honestly
00:07:44.680 Like if you're dating someone that much younger they have way less life experience
00:07:48.360 They don't know themselves as well
00:07:49.480 Like you know how to like shape them like you know how to get them way easier
00:07:53.080 What would you put at predator? Like what what's your what's the age gap that you would say predator?
00:07:58.120 It's a massive word though. It's cougar
00:08:01.400 It's a less negative word. I don't know to be maybe
00:08:04.920 15 20 years 15 20 years and would you say the age gap?
00:08:09.320 Does it matter how old the younger person is like if they're 30?
00:08:12.600 Yes, yeah, it does matter if they if I think if they're under like 25 or they're under 25 or like under 27
00:08:19.320 Maybe yeah, okay, and then it's like 20 years
00:08:22.680 Predator is the wrong word. Predator is
00:08:26.600 Predator is the wrong word and should never be used. Predator is the word you use when you're going after
00:08:32.680 Minors
00:08:33.240 Yeah, minors you are yeah, you're you know
00:08:37.480 There isn't being predator just someone that has kind of power over you
00:08:40.600 No, no a predator is someone who he's seeking out to do harm
00:08:45.880 So where there where there are adults who seek to do harm in a certain way which I you know
00:08:51.880 We can't stay on here to children
00:08:54.520 That is what is called a predator a predator is not what was described in that video
00:08:59.000 If you were a man of any age whether you were going after a male or female child
00:09:05.000 Intending to meet them to do what you're going to do that is a predator
00:09:09.160 So on that video a predator predator is the wrong word and it's taken out of context
00:09:14.600 And it of course it's going to blow up on social media and people are going to start
00:09:19.160 People are influenced by people like her and you're going to start every time you see some a couple out on the street or in a bar
00:09:25.560 You're going to turn around oh, he's a predator or she's a predator because you've heard it on social media
00:09:31.160 It's the wrong word if you want to know what a predator is
00:09:34.360 Yeah, it's definitely not that
00:09:35.800 I don't know if you're underage. It's not consensual. It's between two consensual adults
00:09:40.120 I do agree like your predator must have a bit more intention than that
00:09:43.560 But I think she's saying I don't know. I don't know what she's saying
00:09:46.040 I'm just thinking over the case like you're you're 18 you have the same
00:09:49.560 Rights that I do if you want to jump in a car right now
00:09:52.120 You can go do it if you want to vote you can vote like we're both adults
00:09:55.160 You know, I mean if we're talking about under 16 and all them type of things then we could talk about a different story
00:09:59.800 But I think it's a like like like um, Miss lady in front said, you know
00:10:03.640 I think predators using the wrong sensor
00:10:06.600 I think we
00:10:08.600 My real question is I I don't see the same energy for women
00:10:12.840 I mean even even when you started they're like, okay
00:10:15.720 But it's like on social media if a man says I like a girl that's significantly younger
00:10:21.000 He's shamed for it, but women are I agree. Yeah
00:10:25.720 It is a bit i'm not gonna lie though
00:10:27.720 I think that in a girl's world if you're dating a guy that is younger than you you are
00:10:33.000 Sometimes can be looked at as a bit weird like
00:10:35.800 Why are you going for like that's younger than you?
00:10:37.800 Why not?
00:10:39.000 No, i'm just saying that's how it is usually in the girls world
00:10:41.640 And I think that the difference stems from the intentions as well
00:10:45.480 Usually I would say correct me if i'm wrong
00:10:47.880 I think generally a man that goes for women that is younger it'll be for those reasons of like okay
00:10:52.680 She's less combative. She's um, you know easier to mold and all these things fine. Is that wrong?
00:10:58.680 Wait, whereas if you're a woman and you're going for a younger guy a lot of the time
00:11:02.680 I feel it might be for the energy and
00:11:07.560 Now they've got a whole woman so I think it's like I think that the intentions may be slightly different
00:11:12.520 And that's why I mean what they're getting at and I think they're probably talking from experience
00:11:16.520 You can tell the look in their eyes when you're when you're a young woman and especially if you're a pretty young woman
00:11:21.800 A lot of older men will approach you and at that moment in time when you're that age
00:11:26.360 There's a lot of things that you really just don't know in fact
00:11:28.600 You don't even know enough about men to be able to navigate the world with these sort of men after you
00:11:34.600 So that's why they would come up
00:11:36.200 We'll see you such a strong word to describe it because actually at the end of the day it is a little bit twisted
00:11:42.520 What about a girl that what is it?
00:11:45.480 But why don't we have that same energy of young women that go after older men for their money?
00:11:51.480 Is that is that
00:11:53.480 That's
00:11:55.480 That is terrible
00:11:57.480 Is Leonardo DiCaprio a predator?
00:12:00.600 Would you say that Leonardo DiCaprio?
00:12:02.600 I would argue yes
00:12:04.600 No, no, he just hit me look at what do they say that the
00:12:10.280 No, the economy is so bad that you have Leonardo DiCaprio dating 27
00:12:16.760 I asked the women who go for younger men, so it's wrong for
00:12:20.680 Let's say it's wrong for men in their 30s to go for 18 year olds. I understand why they would like the
00:12:26.680 submissive being cooperative and like less bodies
00:12:30.280 But why would an older woman in their like 30s go for a guy who is like 20 like
00:12:36.840 What benefits? What benefits do you get from going from a man that's like 10 years younger?
00:12:41.080 It's just the stamina, that's it
00:12:43.320 Do you not want that and the girls that actually go for younger men? I do not want a man that can provide and
00:12:49.480 Be like a proper leader. I know there are some younger guys, but generally speaking men men under 30
00:12:55.240 They can't really give you what you want. So I just want to know why
00:12:58.840 But I would say they love you way harder if they're younger because you're more likely to be that one of their first loves
00:13:03.400 Do you know what I mean? Like I think as they are older the love gets a little bit more like I've done this a thousand times like
00:13:08.600 Well, it's kind of
00:13:10.600 I mean, it's kind of a mating strategy in a way because it's like
00:13:14.200 Men have less sexual capital when they're younger and then women have less sexual capital when they're older. So they kind of
00:13:21.080 Hit off each other. Yeah, and don't forget also what the boys said earlier. They're like, oh, yeah
00:13:25.320 She was so much more mature and she was this and yeah
00:13:28.440 I enjoyed it and this so they appreciated her. That's it. So it's nice. Yeah, but what's the what's the woman getting in?
00:13:33.720 I get them with the man
00:13:35.720 Vanity
00:13:38.360 We just want a man to appreciate
00:13:43.640 That's why don't forget that women also vending they require a lot of validation
00:13:48.280 So sometimes when you go for younger man that he's able to give you that
00:13:51.240 But all these guys have just said that they're only looking to like not really like a long commitment with an older woman because she has like
00:13:56.920 Too much baggage and all of that
00:13:58.360 So like what is the older woman getting out of this if it's not just fun
00:14:01.320 Like if it's if she's looking for a long-time commitment
00:14:03.320 Like what is she finding with these young men that don't want a long-time commitment with an older woman?
00:14:07.160 Yeah, would you say it's more companionship?
00:14:09.800 Yeah, I'm gonna ask you if you actually date younger men
00:14:12.520 Um, yeah, it's companionship and I won't judge a young man my
00:14:17.080 I've said it already earlier on my ex was a lot younger than me and
00:14:21.320 Age was totally irrelevant. Um
00:14:24.680 There are some gaps there are things that he won't know and I won't know and then somewhere you sort of just meet in the middle
00:14:30.200 But you get companionship you you know, I I was in love
00:14:33.960 We were I could say we were genuinely in love, you know
00:14:36.680 I'm not going to talk about the reasons
00:14:39.160 We broke up, but yeah, we were together four years and that was with someone younger than me
00:14:43.640 I had companionship. I had friendship. I had someone that understood me
00:14:47.320 I had love I had someone that looked out for me
00:14:50.120 He was actually a great cook. Um, I'm a bit lazy at that
00:14:53.640 Um, you know, I used to go over to
00:14:56.360 His home and there was always food food waiting for me not because I couldn't you know go in the kitchen and make something
00:15:03.320 It was a real relationship. So everyone experiences something different
00:15:06.600 I think we've just got too many stereotypes is
00:15:09.480 Oh, you can't go out with a younger man or you can't go out someone old man
00:15:13.000 So you might tell me I can't go out someone that's 60 or 70
00:15:16.200 But what happens, you know, if I'm attracted they're a nice man
00:15:20.040 The relationship is nice. They're a good person to me
00:15:24.120 Yeah, the companionship is a big word. So to me, it doesn't really matter. You have to it's something that we all said here before
00:15:30.360 You have to and you said it particularly
00:15:32.920 It it depends on the actual person
00:15:35.880 So if I'm going to have a relationship, I mean, I don't want to fling I don't want to be
00:15:40.360 I don't want to be with a man that's just going to fling his bits around
00:15:44.040 Um to put it politely
00:15:46.280 It doesn't matter how old you are obviously we all have age restrictions
00:15:50.120 But if I like you we're attracted you respect me
00:15:54.280 You know, you have love for me. You're my friend. You're my companion. You look out for me
00:15:59.000 You're a man. You're a man. You're a leader. You know how to look after me
00:16:03.800 It doesn't really matter if you've got all those qualities
00:16:07.880 I'm going to be with you
00:16:09.880 how
00:16:11.080 No, never mind the age and some people I know that men I think mature a little bit later
00:16:15.640 We will know that what happens when there's those individuals who are the right one for you
00:16:22.920 I just have a question like yeah, you know, obviously you think that way now when you was like in your late
00:16:29.160 Um late 20s or like early 30s, did you think the same way?
00:16:33.480 Like would you still look for like a younger guy in that same companionship role or you?
00:16:38.520 Is this a recent thing where you decided?
00:16:40.520 No, nothing nothing is recent. My views have never changed
00:16:44.680 um
00:16:45.880 Just a man has to be a good man someone that wants to
00:16:49.400 Look after me
00:16:50.600 But can I just ask would you seek out a younger man actively actively actively no
00:16:56.760 But if one crossed my path and they happen to be you know, let's say
00:17:00.280 I'm just going to get throw a number out here
00:17:02.040 If one crossed my path and all of a sudden I met them and and they I said how old were you and they told me
00:17:07.640 Let's say for example between 25 and 30
00:17:10.520 I'm not all of a sudden going to turn around say i'm sorry can't date you because your age
00:17:14.680 They might be the right person for me. Yeah, fair enough. What about like an 18 year old?
00:17:19.080 Like if you were just out there and an 18 year old came up with you and was like, oh, you're a beautiful woman
00:17:23.240 So so there's a hard cap to it. Yeah, there is
00:17:25.480 There is no I wouldn't
00:17:26.680 No, no
00:17:28.680 But it's kind of interesting because you kind of contradict yourself
00:17:31.640 Yeah, no, I understand
00:17:34.360 I understand what you mean to talk about contradictions
00:17:36.360 So we all have age limits and we've all talked about it here tonight
00:17:39.800 And whilst I'm talking about yes, I will date a younger man
00:17:43.560 I still have my limits, so I don't think that's me contradicting myself. I'm saying yes, I'll date a younger man
00:17:49.080 But I'm capping a limit just like everybody else. So I don't think I'm I'm being contradictory
00:17:56.200 I just want to
00:17:57.800 Excuse me. I just want to add so
00:18:01.160 In terms of my experience with women, yeah
00:18:05.080 I've never actually been in a relationship with a woman that's younger than me
00:18:09.320 And um, what I
00:18:12.280 Hear in these discussions for me that the two key words of the two takeaways are youth and maturity
00:18:17.880 I think it goes in both directions
00:18:20.040 Um, so I think for me, I presented myself
00:18:24.760 As being a lot more older than I then I guess in terms like the barometer of men my age
00:18:30.600 And that's sort of what a lot of women responded to
00:18:34.520 And then once I'd
00:18:36.280 Refilled my age
00:18:38.200 In comparison to the the age that they had the mental image that they had of me
00:18:42.920 It sort of I don't know just sort of made something inside them just go a bit
00:18:48.760 I don't know, um a bit addicted to me in a certain way
00:18:53.800 Um
00:18:55.320 So I just think I think it goes both ways because you were saying earlier about the 18 year olds and the 32
00:19:00.520 Maturity doesn't necessarily have a fixed age
00:19:05.480 If someone carries themselves as like a 25 year old or a 42 year old and stuff more often than not we kind of like
00:19:11.000 Connect with that as opposed to checking people's id cards. So
00:19:14.840 Um, that was just my my takeaway for that
00:19:17.320 It's all what society and people around us say is the right thing to do
00:19:23.320 It's it's it's almost like saying I can't be your friend
00:19:27.480 Unless you eat chocolate mint chocolate
00:19:30.840 You know everyone has to eat me mint chocolate if you want to be connected to me
00:19:34.920 Because that's what society that's what the news tell us to do
00:19:37.880 That's what social media tells us to do
00:19:40.040 That's what your friends are telling you to do
00:19:41.960 How about what you want to do and have sitting down with yourself and thinking actually
00:19:47.320 Is this right? Does it work?
00:19:49.160 Is that the right person for me or am I only doing what society
00:19:54.360 Expect me to do have you ever had someone?
00:19:57.880 Um, do you typically not tell people your age when you meet them like guys you're talking to or interested in?
00:20:03.400 Um guys that i'm talking to
00:20:06.200 Or dating whatever. Yeah, well
00:20:08.520 I've been i'm i've been single for a couple of years by choice
00:20:12.120 So i'm not i'm not going to just go out there and date anyone and just for the sake of it
00:20:16.280 Um, once I start talking to someone yeah, we do we do discuss ages and backgrounds and okay
00:20:22.680 So you you you tell them up front?
00:20:24.280 Yeah, okay. I wasn't sure if that
00:20:27.080 Has anyone ever um rejected you because of your age?
00:20:30.840 Is that do they know before the date?
00:20:32.600 I'm always yeah, I think the only time you get rejected
00:20:37.720 Is sometimes based on?
00:20:40.040 Colour race religion culture those are the things when all of a sudden
00:20:46.040 Things change but age no i've never had a problem with that
00:20:49.560 I have actually been rejected because of my age
00:20:51.800 So I just think like age is also equal to like race color
00:20:55.400 Like sexuality and stuff
00:20:57.080 I've met older guys and then they find out that I am
00:21:00.440 Like at the time 18 19 20 whatever and they were like, oh no, you're too young
00:21:04.200 So I think it's very it's just very circumstantial
00:21:06.920 But the probability when you're younger that you're not going to match with someone a bit older than you is more likely like
00:21:12.280 I think with the mint chocolate idea like
00:21:14.920 Like concept you're you're more likely to like a mint chocolate that's your own age
00:21:19.800 Do you know what I mean?
00:21:20.360 Because you're in the same stage of life more likely
00:21:23.320 But obviously there's going to be those people those outliers that that are that do match you
00:21:29.560 have um
00:21:31.080 Have any raise your hand out of the guys has a girl ever told you that you're too young for her
00:21:35.960 ever
00:21:38.440 Interesting, okay, I was just curious
00:21:40.920 I'm not gonna go for you know, I
00:21:43.480 You're you had a guy so four out of five when you're asking that question you're talking about now or when we were younger
00:21:48.920 Because just ever
00:21:51.880 Yeah, I don't know. I just feel like
00:21:53.960 Yes, there's exceptions to the rule like the minimals the one percent all of these things that is fantastic
00:22:01.000 Ideally would work fantastically, but I the way I look at a relationship is that
00:22:06.680 You're both running the same race separately
00:22:10.680 And then that means that you're more likely to
00:22:14.280 Be successful you're both running the same race separately
00:22:17.320 Yeah, the same way that you say people are the same
00:22:19.240 But they're different the same difference all that kind of thing because this is it
00:22:22.920 We're but it's like a parallel thing and you're striving towards the same goal
00:22:26.600 Which would be to raise a family to obviously have a good relationship together for the rest of your life success blah blah blah blah blah
00:22:32.840 And I think it's much easier and I think it's more you're more likely to succeed if you are at similar stages and levels
00:22:39.080 Because there's so much more understanding in terms of even culture in terms of social context and everything
00:22:44.840 So I just think you're more likely to be
00:22:47.560 More successful in that with somebody that is closer to you in so many more areas
00:22:51.800 What do you think the number one swiped right age is on dating apps for men and for women if you've heard this on the show before?
00:22:58.520 Please don't ruin it. What's the what?
00:23:00.520 What do you okay? What do you think the number one swipe right so like yes?
00:23:04.600 22 ages for men and for women both
00:23:07.880 On dating apps. Women is probably going to be like 32 no?
00:23:11.080 I would say 22 for women. No women's going to be really young
00:23:13.800 No younger for women
00:23:15.000 Men it's going to be like 25
00:23:16.440 So men and for women start here and then go around
00:23:18.840 Um for men I'd probably think 24 25 for women um 40
00:23:25.000 I think guys would pick like 23 girls 32
00:23:33.640 Um men men 20 women 30 35
00:23:38.280 So I think men are probably gonna pick like
00:23:42.600 22 23 I think guys are probably gonna go for like
00:23:45.800 Oh wait wait am I saying like guys are going for them?
00:23:51.160 Yeah, so I think guys will be going for like 25 year olds
00:23:53.880 I think women are going for like older like 28 29 because they want the money
00:23:57.400 Yeah, okay. I think most guys have money by 28 29
00:24:01.080 Yeah, but I think they're like more likely to be successful
00:24:03.000 What guys do you know? Give up my number
00:24:04.360 Um, I think men are going for like probably like 21 maybe even like 20 19 and then girls are going for like 26
00:24:16.280 Okay, uh girls are going out say 22 24. No, sorry guys are going for women who are around 22 23
00:24:24.120 and I think women are going for guys that are like 29 30
00:24:28.200 I think men are picking women
00:24:32.440 That are probably 22 23 and women are going for guys
00:24:40.200 32 to 35
00:24:43.320 Me I think uh, the men will go after the girls who are
00:24:48.200 20 21 and then the girls are probably going like 32 to be fair
00:24:53.720 Yeah, I'd say most swiped women 22 most swiped guys 30
00:24:58.680 No one got it
00:25:02.680 I was actually really I didn't believe this when I first saw it. I was shocked and I'm I'm me, you know
00:25:10.520 Um, the most swiped right age for a guy
00:25:14.040 Um, did anyone say 40s anyone?
00:25:17.000 It's actually older. It's actually older than that. It's 50. Wow
00:25:19.640 Wow
00:25:20.200 That's a surprise
00:25:21.080 How many is that tinder on tinder?
00:25:22.360 Literally
00:25:22.920 No, this was like uh plenty this is
00:25:26.600 It couldn't be tinder
00:25:27.480 I don't know if it was plenty I could look it up
00:25:29.400 I don't I don't know the exact app someone someone put in the comments
00:25:32.120 All right, most swiped right for girls
00:25:35.960 18
00:25:36.600 Oh
00:25:38.600 So all these guys want 18 year olds
00:25:43.720 I mean, I would say I would say the most desired
00:25:46.600 Women are gold diggers
00:25:49.080 I'm sorry
00:25:51.080 Oh
00:25:53.080 Oh
00:25:55.080 Oh
00:25:57.080 You just sat right on me
00:26:01.560 Should I address the elephant in the room?
00:26:05.560 Take take your hood off stop hiding
00:26:07.560 No, I'm not hiding
00:26:08.280 Yeah, you are
00:26:08.760 Should I address the elephant in the room, pal?
00:26:11.560 Where's it?
00:26:12.200 Well, should I address the elephant in the room?
00:26:13.640 No
00:26:14.200 I dress up
00:26:14.920 No
00:26:15.800 I'm gonna address the elephant in the room
00:26:17.560 Let it out
00:26:18.520 There we are
00:26:19.080 Show your face
00:26:19.560 I'm gonna address the elephant in the room
00:26:20.680 No
00:26:21.240 Listen, hold on
00:26:21.960 Hold on
00:26:22.440 Hold on
00:26:22.680 Oh
00:26:23.480 Oh
00:26:23.800 Hello
00:26:25.880 Let it out quickly on you
00:26:29.000 Do you see the elephant in the room, pal?
00:26:35.160 10,000 likes
00:26:36.520 10,000 likes we'll address that
00:26:38.440 See you a lot later
00:26:39.000 I love the show though
00:26:39.800 It's amazing
00:26:43.560 Okay
00:26:44.040 Adios
00:26:44.600 I wonder what the elephant in the room is
00:26:47.320 I think
00:26:47.880 Well
00:26:49.000 Curious
00:26:49.560 I hope it's nothing to do with me
00:26:51.880 No
00:26:54.120 I thought it was like last time
00:26:56.520 Okay
00:26:57.240 Um, okay
00:26:57.880 Back to the social
00:27:01.240 What were we even talking about?
00:27:02.360 Okay
00:27:02.680 18
00:27:03.160 The 18 and the 50
00:27:05.000 We're
00:27:05.320 He was
00:27:05.720 He was saying
00:27:07.240 People are swiping 18 year old girls
00:27:09.720 Yeah, I mean
00:27:10.120 I think it's typical
00:27:11.000 I mean
00:27:11.240 Why are models typically young?
00:27:13.320 Like men tend to like younger women
00:27:15.080 Women tend to like older men
00:27:16.920 Like women are attracted to a guy that can protect and provide
00:27:19.800 A man hits his financial stride and it's like 40s or 50s
00:27:23.480 Men tend to be attracted to fertility and youth
00:27:26.600 I don't think most guys like want to date an 18 year old super
00:27:29.160 Like I don't I don't talk to a lot of guys in real life
00:27:31.320 That say like their number one option is 18
00:27:33.720 Like it seems to be more like 22 to 28 seems to be what guys I talk to typically say
00:27:40.760 But um yeah, I mean typically men go for fertility and youth
00:27:45.320 That's why they call it forever 21 not forever 50
00:27:50.600 I think as as society becomes more perpetuated on how people look
00:27:55.080 Younger girls aren't going for us old guys because I know in myself
00:27:58.280 Like I wouldn't give someone super old because I couldn't take a picture with them
00:28:01.000 Like I couldn't be as proud of them and I think society's becoming feminized in that aspect
00:28:07.400 Um yeah, I mean that's what it's funny. I was really surprised by this. I swear to god when I saw this data
00:28:13.560 I was shocked
00:28:15.080 I couldn't believe it because I was like I don't know many girls that want to date 50 year olds
00:28:19.400 But that's what they're swiping on but you know it's on tinder then we have to consider that
00:28:23.800 Get it for just to be a sugar baby
00:28:25.880 It's either match or plenty of fish
00:28:27.880 But either way
00:28:42.040 It's because of the way people are using dating apps people don't actually use dating apps to get married
00:28:46.840 No, okay, so that's that's what you would think right, but it's actually it's actually the number one way people meet today
00:28:54.360 That's the number one so ladies and gentlemen, that's why we have issues
00:28:59.320 No, you're you're you're right you're right, but i'm saying like that's if that's the number one way long-term relationships are forming nowadays
00:29:06.280 And that's what men and women are swiping on that says something
00:29:10.280 And some some apps are a little different, but they're only different by like a couple years. It's really not that different
00:29:17.000 Is it like dating apps are kind of like corn they over exaggerate the reality of things you
00:29:22.920 When you're going on on dating apps, you can actually
00:29:26.200 Be in touch with an 18 year old where in reality if you're a 50 year old man hanging around 18 year old you're a weirdo
00:29:34.120 If you're if you're hot you're hot like hot girls get swiped say like it
00:29:38.280 It doesn't at what age it doesn't matter
00:29:40.120 But but the point is in general men tend to like younger women and in general women tend to like older men
00:29:45.960 But the exaggeration of the 18 is just an exam. It's just showing it. It's not very good
00:29:51.480 And that's what people are seeing and they're looking at it's not very it's not a very good example
00:29:56.200 To said it's not actually something great. It's not valid
00:29:58.600 because
00:30:00.600 These stats are things that they're they're part of a what i would say a certain
00:30:07.000 Fantasy and idealization of what people think dating is
00:30:10.360 And you and then they're they almost become a reality and it stops it, but it is what it is
00:30:15.640 You can't know i'm saying you're painting
00:30:18.520 If if we ask the married people, how did you meet your spouse and they say dating apps and then we go to the dating apps and say
00:30:24.840 Okay, what ages are people swiping on i have to
00:30:28.040 How is that so reality no that that what that is doing is just showing how twisted it is
00:30:33.240 So basically, there's a lot of men that are going looking for young girls online 18 not even 22 or 23 18 blood
00:30:45.400 Why does that matter
00:30:48.120 It does matter it does matter because it's the same thing that keeps saying like is this fantasy this
00:30:54.520 Guys so if you if you've taken anything from this conversation guys don't really care about age
00:31:00.280 Like the number that's just are you hot are you not
00:31:04.760 Women when they're younger
00:31:07.080 When like i think what you're trying to emphasize is that
00:31:10.680 Like that for women there's a lot more of an idealization for youth like when it's with men
00:31:14.680 It's not as attached like as as women get older a lot of people think oh that they're not as smart
00:31:20.040 They're not as that their advice isn't as helpful, but when men get older they're more wise they're more helpful
00:31:25.960 Like like you always hit the wise man story you don't hit the wise woman's story. Yeah, okay
00:31:31.480 So basically they don't like wrinkles
00:31:34.280 Yeah, in a way because it displays that you're not as fertile in and and i think that's what pa would say
00:31:39.720 But an average woman knows that herself because i mean
00:31:42.440 It's just clear that you guys obviously put so much more attention money into your parents
00:31:48.200 We spent we spent three hundred thousand dollars more in a lifetime on beauty products
00:31:51.800 And i mean like why why why do we get why do we get lip filler? Why do we get botox?
00:31:56.120 Why do we get all of this stuff to look younger like we know it on some level
00:32:00.040 But beautiful women get better men that pay for a nicer lifestyle so that's the sad truth
00:32:05.640 Also are these guys even looking at the age because they could just be seeing young good looking swipe right
00:32:10.360 Do you know i wanted to say that like dudes are just here you could just swipe through
00:32:14.360 No that's what i'm saying i don't think they care i think they're like hot or not hot
00:32:18.360 Yeah, hot or not, they're not looking at age prices
00:32:20.360 But you're all likely to be hot if you're younger that's what we're saying like there's a correlation between the two
00:32:24.840 I mean we all know those people that peaked in high school and like and you know now they look like a mini whale or a legal whale
00:32:33.960 But i just want to be clear so like this you keep on saying the younger a girl is the hottest she is
00:32:40.040 So it's like i genuinely don't think in hotness there's a massive like i actually think girls in their 20s like mid
00:32:47.640 Like just early 20s mid 20s late 20s they look better than 18 year olds
00:32:51.640 They know they have money they know how to do their makeup
00:32:53.960 They know how to like this idea that 18 year olds yeah 18 year olds look better than any girl in it
00:33:00.600 I think that's the exception
00:33:02.200 The date in that profile picture would just be like a boohoo dress or something so
00:33:06.920 And honestly if you date an 18 year old that doesn't look great you can just influence her to dress how you think it's better
00:33:11.720 I mean they they say it's like 18 to 28 is like when a woman's sexual peak is like these are her best years
00:33:20.120 And and it's kind of it's it seems to be kind of similar with the answers to the guy that the guys gave
00:33:25.560 When's a man's best year um they i mean that according to this this date like it depends who you ask
00:33:33.480 But this said 50 was the number one age swiped right on um
00:33:38.040 anecdotally i would guess mid 30s early 40s i would say because then i mean because
00:33:43.800 You have all the girls that are younger than you it's like a bigger pool and imagine
00:33:48.920 but i i i feel like the um the data skewed though in the sense that um from personal experience
00:33:57.320 the younger you go the more options you have as in people actually using these dating apps
00:34:03.000 um so there's probably like a smaller pool of like people probably above 25 faith faith
00:34:08.360 you're looking for certain serious and there's a lot more like you know you've got your computer and people in universities
00:34:13.560 so there's like a if there's going to be like i don't know
00:34:16.760 40 of the total 100 in university then chances are the 18 year old kind of that makes more sense
00:34:21.800 yeah you're right yeah i'm saying in terms of people going for that because
00:34:25.560 um i used i think hinge like a couple months ago and
00:34:30.200 i set my preference um i think my lower end was like 23 and you ran out of options
00:34:36.760 but then when you drop it down to 22 all of a sudden it's just flooded you know i mean so
00:34:40.680 i think there's also some sort of skewing in terms of that statistics because
00:34:44.840 all the men here for me is just generally like 20 at the age that i'm at
00:34:48.760 i know that nearly every man that i know is going to 22 23 22 is a bit too young but that 23 is like
00:34:54.760 the ideal age um and then the older you get i guess it just kind of stays around there and then goes up a
00:35:01.880 bit completely like i don't know like more people that are young use dating apps like more 18 to 21
00:35:07.160 year olds use dating apps more than you would say like a 28 to 32 year old because they're looking
00:35:12.200 for like people roughly that age and i know people that are younger use the internet more often and
00:35:17.080 stuff like you don't get like many 40 year olds like on dating apps i don't think personally just
00:35:21.080 from my personal experience yeah so how valid is the data basically exactly how accurate is it it
00:35:25.480 doesn't show like a complete like representation of all the different ages i just think the point is
00:35:30.440 that men tend to like younger women and women tend to like older men even if the data is a bit off by
00:35:35.560 like five years like let's give it five ten years it's still it's still the general conclusion is
00:35:41.000 still going to be the same when it's 18 and 50. i'm not going to lie i kind of let me tell you a truth
00:35:46.360 that i must admit i agree with you now pearl i always said that i want my man to be older than me even if
00:35:54.280 it's by one year because that one year alone will be able to give this nice room where i can give him
00:36:00.200 another sort of respect above me because submission for me is difficult so i need to find different
00:36:06.520 ways to add to respect so if he's older than me that helps if he earns the meat more than me that
00:36:14.120 helps it's not because i want his money but because it will allow me to actually give him the respect
00:36:19.000 that he is looking for as a man naturally without having to like fake it women tend to like um a guy is
00:36:25.880 five to seven years older than them and then there's another study which was closer to 22 where
00:36:31.400 they asked men like when they found women the most attractive between the ages of like 18 and like
00:36:36.200 70 and they all said 22. so it's it's you know different studies will give it but it's it's generally for
00:36:43.000 women between 18 and 25 roughly good to be an extension to the rule yo can i ask a question like um
00:36:52.280 uh actually it's more directed to my man at the back i'm sorry i forgot your name oh just josh
00:36:57.320 um just on this whole the baggage thing like you were like oh when they're older there's baggage you
00:37:02.280 don't want to deal with that and it's kind of like and you were like she's got issues she's got life
00:37:06.040 experiences and whatnot and it's just from the perspective of like let's accept issues are quite
00:37:11.800 baggage um like most of people's issues come from like in their younger years like their relationship
00:37:18.040 with their parents like abuse that happens with like extreme cases abuse when they're like younger
00:37:23.800 children like just so you can get i suppose my point is you're here you look for a younger girl
00:37:30.200 because she's i suppose more of a clean slate but what happens when you get like a younger girl and
00:37:35.640 she's like gone through that sort of stuff or like has mental health problems or do you get what i mean
00:37:39.880 no definitely definitely and what what i would say to that is to think of it like this
00:37:44.360 let's say even if the case that they do experience at a younger age the more time i give them they're
00:37:51.000 going to still be in the dating pool they're still going to have other experiences adding on top of
00:37:55.160 that so i think of more i think it more of like let me catch it at the shortest point you know what i
00:38:01.320 mean because sure you could go through all those different traumas whatever whatever but then i could
00:38:06.680 be that cutting point for you you know what i mean instead of you going into five other different
00:38:10.440 relationships to 30 other different bodies okay maybe that's extreme but it's like the more time
00:38:15.560 i give you the more that's going to be added on to that so it's like let me just cut it while it's
00:38:20.280 short you know you feel me yeah isn't that the same for men then as well um because men will get more
00:38:26.200 barriers the longer they live i don't really think you you like originally i don't think you guys really
00:38:32.200 care about that in the sense like because i think we have two we have different type of baggage women
00:38:37.240 love baggage actually i don't want a man with kids yeah that's what you would think but but that's
00:38:43.240 not true according to the day you know felons um violent felons reproduce more than non-violent
00:38:48.680 felons can i just ask a question here um correct me i feel like when the guys are talking about baggage
00:38:55.800 and then when the women are talking about baggage i feel like the word the definition of that word
00:39:00.280 is slightly different two different things so yeah when you're saying baggage i feel like i understand you
00:39:05.720 but when you you're saying baggage i feel like something else you're talking about something
00:39:08.760 else i'm seeing kids i'm seeing a lot of past relationships i'm saying trauma that i could
00:39:13.000 step on accidentally things like that is that the same for the rest of you i consider that kind of
00:39:18.760 baggage maybe yeah i don't think i don't personally think that men with kids is baggage but i think
00:39:25.480 women with kids are baggage for men because you guys gotta provide for the kid after the kid and
00:39:31.480 everything i just don't think if a man's in a certain position that you want him to be and if he's got a
00:39:35.560 kid then i don't see that as baggage but you're gonna have to be a mother to someone else's
00:39:39.240 thank you how is that not baby mama baby mama drama yeah i'm constantly seeing a child that reminds
00:39:45.880 you of their ex as a jealous lady thank you i'm not saying it's the same type of baggage but it is
00:39:55.880 it is like a responsibility that you wouldn't know do you get what i mean it's not like ideal but
00:40:02.680 i just think um it's less important than that it's worse for you guys to meet a woman that has kids
00:40:09.720 than for me to meet a man that has kids i think um the mum usually looks after the kid anyway
00:40:17.000 in most cases more than the dad you don't have to actually be a step-mom
00:40:23.000 i don't think okay wait so just so i i'm just i don't want to misunderstand you so you're saying
00:40:28.280 for a man going for a woman who has kids it's more it's it's all baggage but it's more of a
00:40:35.080 baggage for a man entering that situation it's more of a burden for a man into that situation
00:40:42.520 if if dads are less involved then being a stepdad you basically don't have to do because men are less
00:40:46.440 involved in the parenting if you're saying that women naturally yeah because you said that women
00:40:50.520 are no she's talking about i think you're talking about primary custody right no but like you said that
00:40:55.400 women are more likely to take off to the kids but then if you're a stepdad you're not gonna
00:40:59.240 as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this
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