JustPearlyThings - December 28, 2022


Single Parent's Effect on This Generation


Episode Stats

Length

19 minutes

Words per Minute

197.60329

Word Count

3,919

Sentence Count

1


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 he didn't really need to be as much we weren't that bad as children but at the
00:00:03.720 same time it was like if he needed to raise his voice it was situational where
00:00:09.480 my mom would shout constantly that was like her go-to mechanism my mom used to hit me with a spoon
00:00:15.060 don't get me wrong for like single mothers it's not it's not easy bringing up a child or kids on
00:00:26.160 your own it's tough you know I applaud them for what they do but when you start getting angry and
00:00:31.200 you know it's screaming at your kid and there's veins coming down your neck you know that's just
00:00:36.420 that's just way too much too much anger is for a child that doesn't understand what you do the
00:00:41.620 only thing they can get from that is trauma but there's you know in all the situations 90% of
00:00:47.460 women are the parent to the child there's only 10% of full-time single dads that look after the child
00:00:54.600 as the main parent just 10% so I feel like government that doesn't government prioritizing
00:01:00.420 women to have custody over men yeah it could be but I feel like men don't know how it is like to
00:01:05.160 have a child almost 24-7 that's because I feel like it must be really really hard men raise a single
00:01:11.760 parent single fathers raise better children exactly than single mothers when they have been given the
00:01:17.520 chance they've done a better job exactly really yeah I just think women like we get frustrated like
00:01:22.500 when there's a problem yeah because we're emotional yeah we just get frustrated and like cry or get mad
00:01:27.540 yeah I feel and I do it too like like even even and I kind of notice the differences in like the
00:01:32.980 genders doing like solving problems because even with like my business like I'll be doing stuff and
00:01:37.820 I'll just be like get mad at something and my brothers will be like okay why don't you try this this
00:01:42.600 this this this like they're just more logical do you think a man would do a better job raising a
00:01:47.640 girl than than a woman yeah yeah right what about the feminine side would she be more masculine then
00:01:55.380 probably I would say like she's probably probably be a tomboy right it might be hard to find a man my
00:02:02.940 mom was raised by my granddad so my mom was had has four siblings she's the youngest my grand my mom my
00:02:11.200 nan ran off different life then my granddad raised worked has his own business and raised four kids
00:02:18.940 my mom it was a single mom I'm not blowing it well I'm blowing a trumpet because she's the best mom
00:02:27.100 raised my brother me and my sister strong woman was the breadwinner was everything the decorator
00:02:33.220 everything was she shouting a lot all the time she did it because we were bad kids she was a young
00:02:41.920 mom she had my brother at 15 me at 17 but that she got I feel like she got that strongness from my
00:02:49.360 granddad because he was a very strict working man did everything he played both roles so I just think
00:02:57.760 it it differs whereas she was raised by a man I was raised by a woman so I feel like I've got both
00:03:04.120 why I actually like this idea that like men raise children better I would believe that because they're
00:03:10.160 more logic why more men is it because of the government because I feel like a lot of men wouldn't
00:03:14.880 want 100% custody of the child oh no they will because they want their freedom too no no I think most men
00:03:21.140 want to be in their kids lives I can't remember what the stat is off the top of my head but one of the
00:03:26.100 most likely times that a guy is going to commit suicide is when it's like post divorce because
00:03:30.900 oftentimes she'll take yeah divorce yeah what about men who not like in marriage wise yeah but let's
00:03:36.760 say men who been in a relation there's no marriage they just had a child with someone would they actually
00:03:41.480 100% because because I feel like they're very happy with 50 or less um are you talking about men when
00:03:48.640 there's no marriage it's just with a woman that they don't want to be with I don't I don't know but like
00:03:53.480 in my experience most men want to be with their children even even if it's in a shitty situation
00:03:58.640 for the most part unless they're like one of those guys that are just you know shooting up and
00:04:03.200 everybody but that's not the majority but I don't think most men are going to want 100% because if
00:04:08.560 you're in if you're alive and in the child's life why would he want 100% he'd rather do 50-50
00:04:14.140 because at the end of the day even the stats say that men are better fathers there's a certain
00:04:19.200 element to a child that a man can't give that's what a woman needs to be around so being 100% to
00:04:24.200 your child is not as fully beneficial as it would be having both so especially me for example as a
00:04:30.780 man even though I may want 50% I'm not going to want 100% because there's certain errors I can't
00:04:35.320 give you I can't tell you what it's like to be a woman in this world do you not think like a lot
00:04:39.120 of men they're happy to see the child twice a week and they don't want 50-50 that's why because
00:04:43.560 they have to rather than because they want to I know some guys and they they they're happy with
00:04:47.460 their like yeah two days every other week yeah it's not like it's bad everything can be great
00:04:53.220 but once a month they're happy they're happy to yeah you know live their life and oh yeah but then
00:04:58.400 was that was that a father that was actually heavily invested in that woman before they had a child no
00:05:04.140 if that was a if that was an unplanned pregnancy yeah I suppose it makes sense it they I think both of
00:05:10.000 them were unplanned yes yeah so if he was heavily invested and I'm pretty sure two days might not
00:05:14.140 be enough in his mind but you might have to settle for it no I'm I know someone they ain't asking for
00:05:19.960 someone or I know two other people one is basically I ain't fair enough but I'm just saying I personally
00:05:27.640 do know of people and me myself also I was raised like that every other weekend so there's people
00:05:33.820 out here that just they just don't want more responsibility with their children yeah I don't see
00:05:39.700 men really want unless there was marriage or something but wanting 50 50 I think they're
00:05:43.900 happy for the Saturday Sunday or just Saturday I don't know I I think most men want have I think
00:05:49.960 most men want their kids to turn out better yeah and most men want to be a part of that in general
00:05:55.300 um I I think sometimes maybe there are cases where women kind of trap a man and like the men are kind
00:06:03.100 of resentful because like they they don't they didn't want this kid to begin with and she kind of knew what
00:06:07.900 she was doing yeah would you say that's true yeah yeah no yeah I agree um okay so do you guys think
00:06:18.580 the woman is doing the world of favor by having kids is that in general yeah in general depends on
00:06:29.100 circumstances if she's in a good relationship with someone then then yeah it would be a good thing to
00:06:36.600 have if she's single and just yeah well I don't understand the question most of the amazing world
00:06:44.220 leaders we have today were born by women so yeah I would think so yeah I say in general yes because
00:06:49.620 women don't have kids in because we often say that women are special because we have children would you not
00:06:54.300 say I would say I would say maybe they're more doing doing like a duty of nature or what they're
00:06:58.980 meant to do and then a favor you think it's a duty favor it's planned by nature we're doing what we
00:07:04.800 put on this earth to do kind of well I know it doesn't sound the best but don't I don't see it as a favor
00:07:10.920 it sounds like too much of like a favor it's like I'm I'm like created to do that right so if the thing
00:07:20.460 that makes women special is having kids why do so many women focus on their careers and not becoming
00:07:25.800 mothers talking about a modern woman the modern woman is not it's not a traditional woman so I
00:07:32.040 would think your question the first question is really take more to a traditional woman so the
00:07:36.640 modern woman doesn't want to think traditionally but they want traditional men is it's funny isn't
00:07:41.640 it like yeah they're modern but they want traditional men they're very focused on what what did you say with
00:07:48.260 the career if they're more focused on their career if the thing that yeah if the thing that makes
00:07:52.880 women special is having kids because we'll say things we're like the givers of life right like why
00:07:58.220 do we like they'll say we won't run the world why like yeah that's that's come you'd agree that's
00:08:02.960 like common in the culture yeah yeah um so why do so many women focus on their careers instead of
00:08:09.160 becoming mothers this is the thing I think feminism can brainwash you and it brainwashed me a bit
00:08:14.360 at some point where you just sit down and think wait this doesn't add up you just pick and choose
00:08:19.400 and that's very true what you say they say we're special because we make children but then yeah
00:08:23.900 they push focus career I'm independent boss lady um just delusion of feminism yeah I agree I agree
00:08:31.220 that I think now also you can have kids later on in life as well so females I can realize that oh I
00:08:40.460 can like there's more opportunities for women to go and work it's easier there's probably a bit more
00:08:45.920 single women like later on so you're gonna go and yeah but I don't think we really can in general
00:08:52.580 like we're fatter than ever so so I don't like I'm just saying and even even in the UK they'll call
00:08:59.420 America fat but you're yeah you are we are but the stats are not much better here I looked it up
00:09:08.780 one show I'm like what are they bragging about like I mean they're beating us but not by much that's
00:09:19.220 like saying oh I got 45th place oh yeah we're second in the world right USA the first I don't I don't I
00:09:27.620 don't know where it is I don't I just remember looking it up and like thinking that you guys were
00:09:32.180 fatter than you really give yourself credit for but but so so I'd imagine if we're less healthy
00:09:38.540 right we probably don't have as much opportunity to get have children and it's it costs the average
00:09:44.480 person twenty thousand dollars to do in vitro or any of that stuff so the most women aren't going to be
00:09:50.240 able to do that yeah who's got 20 and there's no guarantee that'll even work yeah who's got 20k lying
00:09:55.700 around to play with anyone in here no no not laying so it's like it's almost like they brainwash you with
00:10:06.080 that too would you agree or disagree yes but I think also it's like women go off to university and after
00:10:13.760 university they're not telling you go and have a family they're telling you go and work you spent
00:10:17.360 four years and racked up all this debt you're gonna go work right so they're not thinking like oh let me go
00:10:22.400 find a husband now because maybe most men maybe at that age don't want to settle down and have
00:10:27.980 kids so they're like well what am I gonna do was that I need to work was that what you like maybe
00:10:33.400 followed as well like try to go uni what they said and focus on career no well I was like go to uni and
00:10:40.240 leave this country that's how I was like as soon as you that's what I did as soon as I finished bye
00:10:44.960 why it's cool yeah like now I'm like oh my gosh I love this country but then no it's cold it rains all
00:10:59.780 the time the cost of living is high like it's people are just not then I feel felt like they're
00:11:06.260 just not nice like no one's friendly if you think it's not nice here come to Eastern Europe
00:11:11.660 oh no I've just come there I've just spent a long time now I'm trying to like the UK
00:11:18.200 I remember I went to Latvia so yeah so um I'm a I'm an athlete so we raced in Latvia and it was
00:11:24.560 in the indoor track and I remember all I was doing was walking from one part of the stadium to the
00:11:28.880 other and one of my guys was racing and I remember I was walking and then I saw this guy look at me
00:11:33.200 and he looked at me he grabbed his girl and pulled her and stared at me and I'm just like
00:11:37.380 I don't want your girl and he stared at me all the way to the outside of the stadium and it's like
00:11:41.880 they do that a lot especially when you walk on the main roads in Latvia like they stare at me a lot
00:11:46.200 and I'm just like I ain't done nothing to you I'm so hard for yeah I'm not gonna lie your rarity
00:11:51.000 I grew up in Lithuania first time I seen a black person when I was 18 and I was taking a video from
00:11:55.920 far it's real like the first person it's like your unicorn yeah yeah yeah I recently went to
00:12:03.900 Lithuania uh went to a bar and I was at you know the girl I was chilling we were having a drink and
00:12:08.580 some guy walked over to you a disgrace you know to the woman or you to the woman probably she's
00:12:14.640 with training so obviously maybe you know it was funny like you know it was a bit intoxicated but
00:12:20.460 was that recently did you say yeah recently like wow like last month July yeah yeah do they have
00:12:26.520 internet listen no one knows this our internet is like I think number one in the world the fastest
00:12:32.940 light speed so we're very you know but that's true though because I had um someone that used to work
00:12:39.960 in I used to work in nighttime and there's a polish girl and she said that when she lived in Poland
00:12:44.040 the the image that black people have in Poland was so bad that when she came to England she was
00:12:49.860 surprised it was so nice she was like oh my gosh she married a Jamaican man had kids it's like in
00:12:54.180 the Poland you are not seeing the same way you know women love you the the Lithuanian Latvian
00:13:01.140 women love black people well it's just men yeah yeah but the white women they they like you what
00:13:07.500 is it that happened in Poland recently during the Ukraine Russia war the Africans away crossing the
00:13:13.440 border with getting sent back to where the bombs were falling so they were you know saving all the
00:13:17.340 Ukrainians coming through to Poland but the African the blacks were being pushed back so yeah my mom
00:13:23.400 went Poland with her Polish friends she said she loved it everybody was really nice to her and her
00:13:29.520 friend's son was obsessed with Bob Marley my mom's got lots and he was like he was very very what's
00:13:35.580 the word mesmerized yeah they changed now they changed yeah yeah but the students in Lithuania are saying
00:13:41.340 they call to get like an apartment they don't get way from oh I'm from Nigeria okay no no it doesn't
00:13:49.740 matter if you didn't you literally have to have a Lithuanian girlfriend to even get a reference but a lot
00:13:56.220 of people are still really nice like 90% you get nice experience yeah it's opening up a bit but still dark
00:14:03.000 out there so I have I have another question why is it when a father abandons his child they call it a
00:14:09.420 deadbeat dad but when a woman aborts her child they call it a choice yes right abortion and about well
00:14:21.000 it's probably one of the few times they the ladies think I'm citing for them I don't think abortion and
00:14:26.040 abandoning the same thing okay why um it's not about you when the child is born it's it's a fed person
00:14:34.440 so but like a dead a guy that knows they have a he he has a child it's it's choosing not like why would you
00:14:45.000 want to abandon somebody who you know would need you right but couldn't you say the same thing though
00:14:51.240 yeah both choices yeah but but but a woman who's say for example six is pregnant and she she she thinks
00:14:57.540 she's not ready she could decide to abort a child's not born but when he's born but wouldn't he like
00:15:04.320 wouldn't he be the same thing like he could think he's not ready yeah but the child is here there's a
00:15:09.600 name there's there's someone I mean yeah but there's a unique DNA code with all of the like but the
00:15:15.660 child's not suffering it's just like maybe gone the child could be crying where's the dad it's someone's
00:15:20.820 here it'll affect them but that doesn't mean that it's right that she has the choice but there's a
00:15:26.460 fit person you know like you always say um a woman shouldn't leave the marriage because of cheating
00:15:31.860 think about children it's not about you anymore so I would say when the child is born and that is
00:15:36.140 called that be that like it's not about him anymore about the choice whether he wants what couldn't you
00:15:40.800 flip it and say the same thing when like once you're pregnant it's not about you anymore you could but
00:15:45.780 the human is not there yet it's unfortunate that she can choose to just get rid of it but at least the
00:15:50.400 child is not suffering but the child is forming though yeah but it's not suffering but how do you
00:15:55.920 know that there's not there's not like inclusive evidence that says that it's not suffering and
00:16:00.420 even and even people that are in that field disagree on that there you go you're right if there's no
00:16:04.380 met if there's no metric to measure that like we don't do you know of any metric that you can
00:16:08.700 measure if someone is suffering is who's innocent why should there be a metric the fetus no I'm just
00:16:13.560 saying for example if the child is born you can tell if the child is sad happy or whatever but six
00:16:19.280 with old you can't measure anything do you know I mean I mean they can let you know what stage or
00:16:24.140 what it was going on but you can't measure anything so that's why it's kind of like it is yeah if the
00:16:30.500 woman wants to and the thing is this right if she feels not ready it's equally resp irresponsible to
00:16:37.220 to proceed with it they should be able to have that choice to realize realize realize that 90% of
00:16:46.960 biologists say life begins at conception so if you're going to go with the science like wouldn't
00:16:51.220 you go with the science right okay yeah the life is there but no one's crying so if I kill a baby
00:16:59.620 with euthanasia does it not count I'm not saying it doesn't count I'm saying it's different if she
00:17:08.020 now uses abortion as a formal contraception so she does it regularly then you can you know like
00:17:13.420 like 40% of women do they have had abortions have had two or more but what does it mean if it's not
00:17:19.120 a child then it shouldn't matter like who cares it's just a form of control being a deadbeat dad is
00:17:23.740 worse than abortion so you're actually doing damage to a person that will become part of society and we
00:17:28.780 will affect us all as a society but abortion is just affecting that woman abortion is killing the
00:17:33.820 child technically yeah but you can't say it's just a woman though because you aborting the child it's
00:17:40.840 all hypothesis we know that a deadbeat it's not a hypothesis I hear you but you haven't taken no
00:17:44.980 consideration how he might feel if you aborting the child I'm not saying it's right it's it's it's
00:17:49.420 completely not right man there might be some people who might be some men that go into mental
00:17:53.560 depression because they could have had a child in this world that they wanted you didn't want it and
00:17:58.480 abortion it's crazy though because I think with the question you asked previously about if men
00:18:03.220 were given the same powers women to create life I think men there'll be more abortion if men could
00:18:09.760 do it yeah because very there'll be more abortion so women are you know they even actually given
00:18:15.820 bet quite a good rate no I disagree I think it'd be a small percentage of men that would want
00:18:20.680 abortions I think you're telling me one in three men can't reproduce and like the average like I
00:18:26.320 don't know I think a lot of average guys would want them to have the kids you see I I I'm in
00:18:32.080 between on that because I I feel that if men have the power to abort a baby they probably will but at
00:18:40.040 the same time they might be a lot more careful to ensure that doesn't actually happen so it doesn't
00:18:45.380 get there'll be better people in society like no no as in like they'll prevent it prevent the woman
00:18:50.500 from actually getting pregnant so and I think as well right that abortion should be changed to
00:18:56.980 actual what it is you're actually killing the baby so let's say for what it is because you're
00:19:02.100 actually terminating a life right well if it's if it's a life embryo but I was gonna ask you but
00:19:10.220 after conception right what once the sperm has fertilized the egg that is a life what about it's a
00:19:15.980 living organism but that's the thing like we try to change the language to take accountability off
00:19:20.260 of women it's like a common thing because if we say follow the science but then why don't we follow
00:19:25.160 the science when we say that 90% of biologists say that it's life at conception so why don't we use
00:19:30.140 the terms that they are but it's like we try to play it down to take accountability off as many of you
00:19:34.500 know I was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you
00:19:42.280 want to help please consider sending a super thanks below every donation helps and it helps make what
00:19:48.460 we do possible