JustPearlyThings - June 12, 2023


What He Said Would SHOCK You


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

169.12164

Word Count

1,661

Sentence Count

1


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 often hear the term a modern relationship what is a modern relationship to you i believe it's
00:00:08.480 dysfunctional okay tell me why because men and women are different they're biologically different
00:00:15.520 they were made that way and so they have different desires inherently of what they want
00:00:20.800 and the modern standard in my opinion just doesn't work okay what do you think is a modern relationship
00:00:27.360 uh it's a bit tricky to answer you know because it's like
00:00:35.840 it depends on your age also your where you are as well background and then also religion comes into
00:00:47.360 it as well so it kind of differs but i would say modern relationships now are i would agree with
00:00:54.480 you linda they're dysfunctional unless you you're able to communicate and stuff but it's hard to
00:01:02.080 say this is a modern relationship every relationship is complicated yeah okay what do you think of the
00:01:08.000 modern relationship i would agree with that where this below a certain age it's possibly dysfunctional
00:01:16.240 because there isn't defined roles and maybe there isn't discussions up front about you do this i do
00:01:23.280 that you know and both of you picking up the slack and doing your part and i think some modern
00:01:31.760 relationships are dysfunctional because people don't communicate those expectations up front
00:01:38.000 okay what do you think um i think expectations there's a bit of a blurry line now nowadays i think sometimes women earn more they do more sometimes men do the same so i think sometimes it's not it's it's not it's not as it used to be um
00:02:04.000 it was clearer before right in a way i think young people don't they don't want it to be clear i
00:02:16.000 think it's just the way it is it's blurred that's an interesting point yeah how has dating changed over time
00:02:24.080 i think it was quite i don't know if it was simpler meeting someone i think nowadays it's harder to meet someone
00:02:30.000 mm-hmm although everyone does dating online but it seems harder still to to drum up communication
00:02:38.640 for someone to speak to you people normally speak um through texting yeah so people don't although
00:02:44.800 everyone's got inclusive minutes they're still texting so that is quite impersonal i find dating
00:02:52.560 nowadays and i think back in the day was they say it was easier people more accommodating people more open
00:02:59.360 i'm not sure people that open now would you say um because a common complaint i hear from men is that
00:03:05.280 women's standards are too high would you say women's standards have gotten higher over time or has it
00:03:10.800 always been like that they're unex i think they're unrealistic their expectations are unrealistic so
00:03:19.440 we a young person might say i'm just going to say a young person might say i want a guy who
00:03:24.880 i don't know drives he's got somewhere to live and he he should be earning xyz
00:03:34.400 they want that for someone but they don't really want that for themselves so the guy has to level up
00:03:39.520 but the girl doesn't have to level up yeah she just has to be available there would you would you guys
00:03:46.560 say that the dating apps has exacerbated that progression so like i feel like the dating apps skew
00:03:55.600 that to a large degree because like we have the stats right where only 20 percent of guys are seen
00:04:03.120 as eligible whereas i think in real life you might chat to a guy you wouldn't swipe right to and there's
00:04:10.000 that removal of like a human element you know and the biggest things for long-term relationship success
00:04:17.920 pretty much has nothing to do with your looks yeah you know um i would say that yeah it's made it worse
00:04:26.640 i don't i don't think social media has made relationships better which is interesting because
00:04:31.360 we have more ways to talk to people than ever but it seems like we're more distant yeah it's weird because
00:04:37.920 like we before um like i i had german nannies growing up and it would be really hard to keep
00:04:44.880 in contact with them because of like you know like skype was kind of iffy and it just it just was harder
00:04:50.960 when i was younger and now it's so easy but even with all this technology it's like we all talk less
00:04:57.200 it seems like definitely and people's social skills like after all the craziness the last few years i think
00:05:04.800 everyone's social skills just took a hit and even people who claim to be extroverted you know they
00:05:12.080 would happily sit at home you know i have friends that were more sociable than me in a way and now
00:05:17.600 they're just like happy to chill at home and i think i think you can actually set yourself apart
00:05:24.400 like in previous experiences i've had just going up to someone having a conversation is almost unheard of
00:05:30.800 now that obviously we can get into all the expectations to get into a relationship but
00:05:36.400 just to open the door and speak to someone i actually think is easier than people would let
00:05:42.400 themselves on now initial attraction is obviously a factor in that but i still think that you can set
00:05:49.040 yourself apart just by being nice being interested in someone which um would you girls agree like i i think
00:05:56.720 as a girl like if a guy actually approaches you in person i'm more likely to say yes than if he like
00:06:03.200 dm's me on instagram or on a dating app or something like to giving him my number would you agree or
00:06:08.000 disagree depending i agree for sure you agree i mean i don't use dating apps i only go based in person
00:06:14.960 because um like for me it's it's the aura that they have it's the way they approach you are they
00:06:21.760 overtly sexual right away are they asking interesting questions uh what do they choose to
00:06:27.040 ask about me sort of thing and just it's it's easier to kind of explore their mind on a dating
00:06:32.880 app if i didn't like how someone looked i could be swiping uh what's the direction
00:06:39.120 left left i could be rejecting like my future husband that i have like so much in so much in common
00:06:46.000 intellectually and and values when guys don't take good pictures i think in general so i on this point
00:06:53.200 i uh said someone close to me swipe right on five guys not that you find really unattractive but just
00:07:00.160 you have a kind of type but just bend the rules a little bit swipe right on five guys and just see
00:07:05.840 where it goes just do it because you never know and i think everyone that's been in a relationship here
00:07:14.560 i think could agree that yes looks are important yes you need to be attracted to your partner
00:07:19.680 but there is so much more that everyone requires to stay in a long-term commitment money did you say
00:07:27.760 money just started yeah no i wanted to make a point from the or because i didn't have a chance to speak
00:07:35.840 so many things i just wanted to say um yeah as she said i feel like no relationship are just
00:07:42.320 mostly like super like superficial and toxic for a certain fact that social media is there now so
00:07:48.720 obviously now everyone got a fake expectation like not realistic expectations because of what you see
00:07:53.520 but i was also how people what people showed you now if a guy that always shows me like rich and millie
00:07:58.880 jewelry money big cars approach me i am expecting you living that kind of lifestyle now if i'm seeing you
00:08:06.080 and then you're just a normal guy having a nine to five you're not entrepreneur you don't own what you
00:08:10.080 claim your own i'm not gonna date you anymore because you're lying so why would i date you it's
00:08:15.200 like me if i will go on my instagram and just photoshop my pictures like i got big like nice
00:08:20.240 body bbl big everything now i'm going and i'll complete a different person the guy will like why
00:08:24.880 you lie but at the same thing would you say women are lying when they use filters then i believe they
00:08:30.720 got to the point where they get so like insecure but they look because they keep like constantly like
00:08:36.240 compete with people that they see they're not realistic beauty standards if that makes sense
00:08:42.480 like you cannot compete for like a king kardashian or some alexis sky for example and then i don't
00:08:48.560 really see the point on doing that personally but um going back on the dating thing i feel like it was
00:08:53.840 really really bad before especially after covid yeah people don't they have like social anxiety i see
00:08:58.880 they got any more introvert because they got used to stay home but at the same time i don't know i feel
00:09:05.440 there's no like there's no willing to communicate anymore to be honest anymore not even to personally
00:09:12.000 i'm gonna become probably unpopular opinion i like a guy they can provide for me like they have actually
00:09:16.960 a good job stable job because as a man you are actually meant to provide for the woman you need to
00:09:21.840 make me feel like i can count on you if i want to open a family i have a family right i can't be with
00:09:26.320 someone that got no job live with their mom no money why would i do that but on the same point i believe
00:09:32.960 it got so toxic to the level that you can't be like honest anymore if that makes sense because
00:09:38.160 everyone lies a lot maybe thanks to social media as well i don't know if that makes sense so even
00:09:44.080 dating apps as well as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demon