JustPearlyThings - April 29, 2023


Why Marriage Is Not Worth It In 2023


Episode Stats

Length

8 minutes

Words per Minute

217.88277

Word Count

1,934

Sentence Count

158


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 I don't think we can ever really go back to the way it was until they get rid of no-fault divorce
00:00:04.080 because what's marriage? Marriage isn't marriage today. If you get married in the church, it's not
00:00:08.580 the same thing as it was because the average marriage is eight years. So what are you getting
00:00:12.740 out of marriage? You're not getting a lifelong commitment if the women are leaving.
00:00:17.180 And so it's like now marriage is supposed to be for sicker, for poorer, or for richer,
00:00:22.320 for poorer, in sickness and in health, for better, for worse. Now it's until I'm not happy.
00:00:26.700 So it's not the same. It's not the same thing. Like, how could it be the same thing?
00:00:32.200 It's just like, it might as well just be a relationship.
00:00:35.280 Yeah, but a lot of guys don't want to marry though as well. A lot of guys are happy to be in relationships
00:00:38.620 and not married.
00:00:39.080 But do you think that's maybe because they just think that the dual estates are so high?
00:00:43.620 I think it's a financial thing as well. And I think that also, if you've been grand and
00:00:49.020 then you've worked your way up to some sort of level of success and you meet someone on
00:00:53.060 that journey and it's like, okay, cool. You know, you don't want to like, you know,
00:00:58.620 because you've got a 50-50 in a marriage and okay, cool, you don't have to. But I feel a
00:01:03.100 lot of guys think about financially other things as well that can imply as well when
00:01:07.440 you're married as well.
00:01:08.240 Yeah, like what incentive, like what do men get out of marriage today? Nothing.
00:01:12.560 But it's not about money though, is it?
00:01:13.980 Marriage for women is kind of like a fantasy, it's like a, a special day and yeah.
00:01:24.020 I don't want to say it's unrealistic because again, it's to the individual, but it's all
00:01:33.540 of that for one day, a lot of money.
00:01:35.080 It's a fairytale bro.
00:01:35.760 Yeah, it depends on the one day and really into that money could be, but if the relationship,
00:01:39.460 if you are serious about the relationship, that money probably could be better spent.
00:01:41.920 Yeah, in the right place.
00:01:43.800 Yeah, finesse in the relationship.
00:01:45.640 Of course.
00:01:46.640 I heard that.
00:01:47.800 Depends on your budget, I guess.
00:01:49.180 Yeah, that's right.
00:01:50.180 That's definitely very true.
00:01:51.180 The guy could be rich, so you could have the rich wedding.
00:01:53.480 Yeah, I've seen it all.
00:01:55.180 And then again, that more alludes to the whole fantasy type of thing, because if the budget's
00:01:59.100 massive, you're going to go big and go crazy with it.
00:02:03.160 Actually, marriages last shorter the more they spend on the wedding.
00:02:07.160 Yeah, because again, yeah, that would make sense because again, like if a,
00:02:11.860 ladies are really in love with a man, the man's got a small budget for a wedding, but
00:02:16.820 she's really in love with him, she's going to go with it and really maximize it because
00:02:19.820 it's not the money that's spent, it's the happiness and the enjoyment.
00:02:22.540 If a woman's with a guy and he's got loads of money and they go big on the wedding,
00:02:27.480 it wasn't really the love, it was more about the fantasy and the whole dream and all of
00:02:34.160 that kind of stuff there.
00:02:35.620 Yeah.
00:02:36.620 And again, these are fundamentals.
00:02:37.620 Do you think you can have it both?
00:02:39.580 You can have the big wedding and that and love?
00:02:43.580 Yes, you can, because anything's possible.
00:02:46.580 You understand?
00:02:47.580 It's going to be a very small percentage that's going to be happening with, we're breaking
00:02:51.800 it down.
00:02:52.800 But yes, it's definitely possible.
00:02:54.580 I feel like the chances are so small.
00:02:56.580 It would be like two people who have come up together.
00:02:59.580 Like, do you know what I mean?
00:03:00.580 Yeah, that's right.
00:03:01.580 Yeah.
00:03:02.580 That's right.
00:03:03.580 Yeah.
00:03:04.580 That would be a good way of looking at it.
00:03:06.580 You understand?
00:03:07.580 Yeah.
00:03:08.580 And even like back in the day, men used to get something out of marriage to get a
00:03:11.580 virgin or at least a girl for like a low body count.
00:03:14.580 But nowadays it's like, what percent of women are virgins on their wedding night?
00:03:17.580 So they used to get purity in youth.
00:03:19.580 And now the average age of first marriage is like 28 or no, it's 31 in the UK.
00:03:23.580 And so it's like, they're not getting a young girl anymore.
00:03:25.580 They're not getting a virgin anymore.
00:03:26.580 It's like, what, what do they get out of marriage?
00:03:28.580 Wow.
00:03:29.580 Do you think that now, like, because women have more like their careers are different
00:03:35.580 now.
00:03:36.580 So more like back in the day, women weren't so career orientated, but now maybe women
00:03:41.580 are a bit more career orientated.
00:03:43.580 So the money might come equally from the women and the man.
00:03:46.580 So it might not even be like that the man needs to get something out of it.
00:03:51.580 It could be more equal.
00:03:52.580 I'm not saying that's good or bad.
00:03:53.580 And what's he getting out of it then?
00:03:55.580 The same as what the women's getting out of it.
00:03:59.580 What the women gets protection and provisioning.
00:04:02.580 Yeah.
00:04:03.580 And they get that, the fantasy day, the dress and the walking down the aisle and all that
00:04:07.580 status.
00:04:08.580 Yeah.
00:04:09.580 Guys, not really.
00:04:10.580 You just get respect.
00:04:11.580 Into that.
00:04:12.580 Well, I mean.
00:04:13.580 I do agree with you.
00:04:14.580 That's what I found this out today when I was talking to the, I forgot what his job title,
00:04:18.580 he wrote a really big book, but basically like when women, the biggest factor that's played
00:04:23.580 in women are like kind of the breakdown of the family was in the twenties.
00:04:26.580 Women started going.
00:04:27.580 Like that was when they start, they used to stay with their dads until they would get married.
00:04:31.580 So their dads would find them, their husband basically.
00:04:34.580 And then like, they never lived on their own, but like, that's when women started having
00:04:38.580 kids less.
00:04:39.580 And that's when like the age of first marriage started going up was when women started entering
00:04:42.580 the workforce.
00:04:43.580 Yeah.
00:04:44.580 Feminist movement.
00:04:45.580 Make them.
00:04:46.580 Yeah.
00:04:47.580 Yeah.
00:04:48.580 Again, and the feminist movement is to, to my knowledge, like a big breakdown in society,
00:04:53.580 families, the incentive to kind of change the whole dynamics.
00:04:55.580 And now women are a lot more do it themselves and more powerful and stuff like that.
00:05:00.580 And a lot of women are saying this, they don't need a guy and stuff like that.
00:05:03.580 Just change the whole polarities.
00:05:04.580 And again, it's made men a lot more weak or emotional and the whole thing's kind of
00:05:10.580 surprising.
00:05:11.580 I've just found out the other day, it came from witchcraft too.
00:05:14.580 Like a lot of the things that you hear girls say, like goddess, queen, like that sort of
00:05:18.580 thing.
00:05:19.580 It's actually like originates from like some sort of, I'm butchering it, but it's some
00:05:23.580 sort of witchcraft.
00:05:24.580 Yeah.
00:05:25.580 Yeah.
00:05:26.580 I'm serious.
00:05:27.580 Because it was like, it was like, it was like this girl that like, like she wanted to
00:05:30.580 like put down men.
00:05:31.580 So a lot of, a lot of the, sorry, I'm butchering it so much.
00:05:34.580 Cause it's not off the top of my head, but it's like a lot of like the trends that we
00:05:38.580 see, like people think that feminism is about equality, but it's really not.
00:05:41.580 It's about freedom at the expense of men.
00:05:43.580 And it's like, now that women have gotten the freedom to vote, like what have we done
00:05:46.580 with it?
00:05:47.580 We, we've built a society that puts down men.
00:05:49.580 Yeah.
00:05:50.580 That's it.
00:05:51.580 Women, a lot of women don't respect men nowadays.
00:05:53.580 And that's a, you know what I'm saying?
00:05:54.580 A big fundamental is why certain people are going to rip people's coats and all these
00:05:59.580 type of things.
00:06:00.580 It's a lack of respect.
00:06:01.580 What age group are we talking about here?
00:06:03.580 Because what you're saying could be for the other generation, the older lot.
00:06:08.580 Now the younger lot, it's not like that.
00:06:10.580 They're still trying to, like, I know, I don't know, but personally how I see it, how I see
00:06:15.580 the youngest moving these days, they're patterning up girl easy.
00:06:19.580 Girl ain't moving with that energy that they have the power.
00:06:22.580 You get it?
00:06:23.580 Men are moving like they can run things.
00:06:25.580 You see it?
00:06:26.580 No, but see, you're, you're correct.
00:06:28.580 You're correct.
00:06:29.580 But it's a small percentage of men.
00:06:31.580 Okay.
00:06:32.580 So before 30 women, women go for the 20% of men typically.
00:06:35.580 Okay.
00:06:36.580 So it's like, like basically like women go for the 20% of men and then they hit 30.
00:06:40.580 Remember geriatric pregnancy starts at 35.
00:06:42.580 And if a woman hits 30 and she's single, she has less than a 50% chance of having a kid
00:06:46.580 because there's going to be more single childless women than literally ever in history.
00:06:49.580 It's like unprecedented because if a woman hits, if she's still single at 30, that means
00:06:54.580 that like she has to get to a point that she has to get the guy to like marry her.
00:06:57.580 So we're going to see more single childless women.
00:06:59.580 And, and the thing is, um, the, the issue is for, I forgot where I was going to end.
00:07:05.580 I forgot where there's a question.
00:07:06.580 No, I was just chatting about that.
00:07:08.580 Like I said, uh, the age group in it, what age group are you on?
00:07:11.580 Oh, and so, so the men, sorry, I forgot for a second.
00:07:14.580 I'll go on tangents.
00:07:15.580 But so that, so the men in, in the women in their twenties are dealing with the top 20% of
00:07:20.580 men, maybe 30% of men, then they get closer to 30.
00:07:22.580 They start to go for the top, maybe like the next 20% or 30% of men.
00:07:26.580 Right.
00:07:27.580 And, and we get this data from dating apps too.
00:07:29.580 And, and also like, I don't know, just, they, they do, they do stuff to figure this out.
00:07:34.580 Yeah.
00:07:35.580 And so the issue is that like those men have all the leverage.
00:07:38.580 And, and so those men get that treatment, but women don't treat the average men.
00:07:42.580 Well, the average guy that works at Tesco, the average guy that works like down the street.
00:07:45.580 The ones that know how to pattern.
00:07:47.580 Yeah.
00:07:48.580 Obviously they, they're the ones who get dealt with differently.
00:07:50.580 This is why when she, when you're saying that the power's there and the women and it's
00:07:54.580 harder for men, in my time or the time I'm seeing, that's not the case.
00:08:00.580 Right.
00:08:01.580 Obviously it's different genre, different set up.
00:08:03.580 You get me?
00:08:04.580 Yeah.
00:08:05.580 Yeah.
00:08:06.580 So it's obviously an age group thing.
00:08:07.580 It's, it's, it's more.
00:08:08.580 Again, it's personal.
00:08:09.580 It's what you do.
00:08:10.580 You're out there.
00:08:11.580 You understand?
00:08:12.580 Yeah.
00:08:13.580 The comparison was like a, and again, there's nothing wrong with working in Tesco to driving
00:08:16.580 a bus or being a road sweeper.
00:08:17.580 There's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
00:08:19.580 It's that society kind of looks down in it.
00:08:21.580 In front of your, your kind of, your name brand.
00:08:24.580 We're going to put your hands on.
00:08:25.580 So your experience is going to be different than the next man's experience like that.
00:08:29.580 It's hard for you to see it.
00:08:30.580 Yeah.
00:08:31.580 In my side of it.
00:08:32.580 That's what I was trying to work out.
00:08:35.580 But I hear you.
00:08:36.580 That's what I'm saying.
00:08:37.580 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok and we are demonetized on a daily basis
00:08:42.580 on this platform.
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