Louder with Crowder - May 05, 2022


LIVE COVERAGE: Amber Heard Testifies Against Johnny Depp! | Louder with Crowder


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 8 minutes

Words per Minute

183.63612

Word Count

23,686

Sentence Count

2,413

Misogynist Sentences

107

Hate Speech Sentences

51


Summary

Amber Heard was found guilty of one count of aggravated assault and battery on Johnny Depp. She was also convicted of a count of assault and false imprisonment. On this episode of Feminist Cops, we discuss all of this and much more!


Transcript

00:00:00.000 🎵 Outro Music 🎵 Viewer discretion is advised.
00:00:19.000 Bad girls, what you gonna do when they come for you?
00:00:33.000 Bad girls, bad girls, what you gonna do?
00:00:36.000 What you gonna do when they come for you?
00:00:38.000 Bad girls, bad girls, what you gonna do?
00:00:41.000 What you gonna do when they come for you?
00:00:46.000 Feminist Cops is filmed on location with the brave, strong women of law enforcement.
00:00:50.000 All suspects are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.
00:00:53.000 315, confirm suspect is in 302, over.
00:00:57.000 Alright, so we got two warrants out for this guy.
00:00:59.000 This guy is arresting, he's not coming out, so we're gonna have to extract him.
00:01:05.000 So, yeah.
00:01:57.000 315 correction suspect is in 301.
00:02:02.000 Over.
00:02:04.000 Bad girls, bad girls, whatcha gonna do?
00:02:15.000 What you gonna do when they come for you?
00:02:20.000 You're a strange animal, that's what I know You're a strange animal, you're a strange animal
00:02:47.000 You're a strange animal, how come you're so far away?
00:02:51.000 I'm gonna feed you to the wolves You're a strange animal, you're a strange animal
00:02:59.000 Mmm, wow, that tastes delicious.
00:03:03.000 Wow, that tastes delicious.
00:03:05.000 And it tastes delicious because I'm not a sociopath, so I can enjoy things.
00:03:09.000 We'll be talking about Amber Heard quite a bit today.
00:03:12.000 Right now, is she not on the stand?
00:03:13.000 Okay, she's not on the stand exactly right now.
00:03:15.000 Are they in recess?
00:03:16.000 I think so.
00:03:18.000 A lot of you have asked us to discuss Amber Heard a little bit more, and many of you say that you don't want to see her face, her pretty but horrible evil face.
00:03:27.000 Here's why we're going to be doing Quite a bit of live streaming on Amber Heard later.
00:03:31.000 We're going to get to Joe Biden first, former Vice President Joe Biden, and him referring to you as extremists, right?
00:03:36.000 Everyone who's pro-life, everyone who actually supports the idea of abortion rights going back to the States.
00:03:41.000 Which brings my question of the day before Amber Heard.
00:03:43.000 We'll have some more questions later.
00:03:45.000 Who do you think is the most extreme political group in the United States?
00:03:48.000 Is it far-right?
00:03:49.000 Is it far-left?
00:03:51.000 Is it far-libertarian?
00:03:52.000 Who just want to smoke weed and trade Bitcoin on their couch?
00:03:55.000 I don't know.
00:03:55.000 The point is we all have our thing.
00:03:58.000 But I do think it's important, this Amber Heard, this is kind of a landmark case because I was very surprised to see that the people least tolerant of the shenanigans are women, particularly women who've been abused.
00:04:10.000 If you run a search on Amber Heard and abuse victims right now, you will see many abuse victims speaking out saying that this does not seem to be someone who is a victim of abuse.
00:04:19.000 And at the very least, we know she is an abuser as well.
00:04:21.000 Maybe Amber Heard was abused.
00:04:23.000 We don't know.
00:04:24.000 It doesn't look like it, but we certainly know that she was an abuser.
00:04:28.000 That was admitted yesterday.
00:04:30.000 That she physically abused Johnny Depp.
00:04:32.000 I'm not even a fan of Johnny Depp!
00:04:34.000 But the guy had the crap kicked out of him by a woman multiple times.
00:04:37.000 No one is arguing that.
00:04:38.000 It's just, did Johnny Depp ever retaliate?
00:04:41.000 That's a difficult standard to have in a society, and expecting men and women to coexist.
00:04:48.000 Again, it's not, do we have laws?
00:04:49.000 It's, are the laws applied equally?
00:04:52.000 And we know that they often aren't, with hot chicks.
00:04:56.000 Before we get to the rest of that, I don't know what's going to happen if they'll get us with copyright.
00:05:00.000 You'll keep him posted, right, Togan Owen?
00:05:02.000 Because sometimes they do that.
00:05:03.000 If we get booted here on YouTube, we're on Rumble, and every Monday through Thursday, 8—sorry, 8—every Monday through Thursday, 10 a.m.
00:05:10.000 Eastern, Rumble or Mug Club.
00:05:12.000 We'll go to Mug Club and take your chats here today and do a little bit more livestreaming of Amber Heard.
00:05:15.000 They are telling me we're going to have to play a drinking game as we livestream.
00:05:19.000 It's early, but it's Cinco de Mayo.
00:05:21.000 Relapse.
00:05:22.000 Yep.
00:05:23.000 There you go.
00:05:23.000 You just had something in a plastic baggie.
00:05:25.000 Please tell me it was a mint.
00:05:27.000 It was a mustache.
00:05:28.000 Okay.
00:05:28.000 I nixed it and it's off my face now and I'm not happy about it.
00:05:32.000 Was it an accident?
00:05:33.000 Yeah.
00:05:33.000 All right, but I didn't introduce him.
00:05:34.000 Hold on.
00:05:34.000 Let me get to you because first we have to introduce the star.
00:05:38.000 Gerald A. is not here.
00:05:39.000 He's just had a child.
00:05:40.000 So Gerald B., how are you?
00:05:43.000 You know what?
00:05:43.000 I never thought I'd say it.
00:05:45.000 I miss Gerald A. a little bit.
00:05:47.000 I really do.
00:05:48.000 I gotta be honest.
00:05:49.000 Gerald B., I don't mean to offend you, just not as good.
00:05:53.000 No, Gerald B. just takes it.
00:05:54.000 That's the problem.
00:05:55.000 There's a difference between being a whipping post, being a good sport like Gerald A., and just, Gerald B. almost seems to enjoy it.
00:06:00.000 Almost seems to avail himself to whatever it is you want to provide.
00:06:04.000 He really just gives it.
00:06:06.000 Well, no, he doesn't give anything.
00:06:08.000 But he does receive.
00:06:09.000 He takes.
00:06:09.000 Yes.
00:06:10.000 You know what?
00:06:11.000 It feels good to give, Gerald B. Don't just be a taker.
00:06:15.000 We'll get Gerald A. back in next week.
00:06:16.000 Yeah, one day.
00:06:17.000 By the way, you hear this voice, you know he's the quickest wit in the West.
00:06:21.000 He'll be in Springfield, Missouri, Lincoln, Nebraska this week, and you can go to loudmouthcredit.com slash tour to book tickets.
00:06:27.000 Dave Landau, how are you, sir?
00:06:28.000 Ahoy!
00:06:28.000 Good, good enough.
00:06:30.000 Obviously I'm Team Depp.
00:06:33.000 I see I'm so out of touch, I thought we were still Werewolf or Vampire, is that not?
00:06:37.000 Yes.
00:06:39.000 I nicked my mustache last night and I'm very obsessed.
00:06:42.000 Now I gotta regrow it from scratch.
00:06:44.000 Yeah.
00:06:44.000 I'm regrowing it.
00:06:45.000 Or leave in the comments if you think I should or shouldn't.
00:06:47.000 Yeah.
00:06:48.000 I think the comments shouldn't.
00:06:49.000 Shouldn't?
00:06:50.000 I liked it.
00:06:51.000 Did your wife like it?
00:06:52.000 Uh, yeah.
00:06:54.000 Really?
00:06:55.000 I guess?
00:06:56.000 I don't... well, okay.
00:06:57.000 That means there wasn't a conversation.
00:06:58.000 Well, it's more just like, I'll live with that.
00:07:00.000 Yes, exactly.
00:07:01.000 I mean, maybe.
00:07:02.000 Right.
00:07:02.000 That's... well, that's what most wives do.
00:07:04.000 They just... I looked up Tom Selleck and Burt Reynolds without a mustache yesterday, and it's like, it's just... No.
00:07:10.000 Not okay.
00:07:10.000 Don't even try and search that with Wilford Brimley.
00:07:12.000 It's just a lemon party.
00:07:13.000 Now!
00:07:13.000 Doesn't make sense.
00:07:14.000 Don't search Lemon Party.
00:07:15.000 Don't search Wilford Brimpley.
00:07:17.000 None of this is good.
00:07:18.000 So before we move on here to former Vice President Joe Biden, let me show you what happened yesterday.
00:07:24.000 And this is the moment.
00:07:25.000 This is the moment yesterday.
00:07:27.000 Amber Heard was testifying.
00:07:27.000 She's testifying today.
00:07:29.000 And I think it's an important character study in a sociopath.
00:07:31.000 We might even want to bring in Kevin later, who's a PhD candidate in psychology.
00:07:37.000 I'm a sociopath.
00:07:40.000 Or at least a narcissist.
00:07:42.000 Yesterday she said something that I think was maybe lost on most people, and it shocked me when I heard it, and I think it's the primary problem with third-wave feminism and condemning men for toxic masculinity and wanting it both ways.
00:07:57.000 See if you can catch the terrifying part.
00:08:01.000 Before I know it, he starts crying.
00:08:05.000 Now.
00:08:05.000 And you know, like, I've never seen an adult man cry.
00:08:12.000 I didn't even really see my dad cry at my grandma's funeral.
00:08:15.000 You know, it's just, it's weird.
00:08:17.000 And he's crying.
00:08:21.000 It's weird.
00:08:22.000 So hold on, let me get this straight.
00:08:26.000 Why can't you sit on the stand while you're crying?
00:08:28.000 Well, there's no self-awareness.
00:08:29.000 She's trying to emulate what she has seen as human emotions right now.
00:08:34.000 And she doesn't realize that you shouldn't say a man crying is weird.
00:08:37.000 So let me be clear about this.
00:08:38.000 We say toxic masculinity.
00:08:39.000 You shouldn't be aggressive.
00:08:40.000 You shouldn't be a type A personality.
00:08:43.000 You shouldn't take control.
00:08:44.000 You shouldn't exhibit, necessarily, leadership qualities.
00:08:46.000 These are bad things.
00:08:47.000 This is toxic masculinity.
00:08:48.000 You need to be open with your emotions.
00:08:49.000 Okay.
00:08:49.000 Then, if you cry, it's weird.
00:08:52.000 If you yell, it's abuse.
00:08:53.000 If you hit a cabinet, it's abuse.
00:08:55.000 If you cry, it's weird.
00:08:57.000 What is someone like Johnny Depp supposed to do?
00:08:59.000 What is the man in your life supposed to do?
00:09:00.000 I know not all women feel this way, but there are a lot of women who use it against them.
00:09:04.000 Come on, all of us have had a woman use it against you when you cry.
00:09:08.000 I remember being in a relationship where they said, you know, you shouldn't yell, you shouldn't get mad, that's disguising your emotions.
00:09:13.000 Vulnerability is... and then I cried and they were like, bitch!
00:09:15.000 I was like, I can't believe this!
00:09:17.000 Well, it's not my fault.
00:09:18.000 It just happens during sex.
00:09:20.000 Yes!
00:09:21.000 Usually after.
00:09:22.000 Usually her.
00:09:23.000 During, after, before.
00:09:25.000 And then I just cry because I'm wondering why it always happens.
00:09:27.000 I'm vexed.
00:09:28.000 I just can't figure it out.
00:09:30.000 So what is a guy supposed to cry?
00:09:31.000 So this is why men don't cry.
00:09:33.000 It's not because men don't think it's acceptable to cry.
00:09:36.000 I've always said there are acceptable times to cry.
00:09:38.000 You can't cry all the time.
00:09:39.000 You can't be a crybaby.
00:09:40.000 Mostly unacceptable.
00:09:42.000 Mostly unacceptable.
00:09:43.000 Mostly.
00:09:43.000 But certainly not in the realm of a relationship or a death in the family.
00:09:46.000 In other words, it shouldn't be weird for a man to cry.
00:09:49.000 But if a man cries, it's used against him.
00:09:51.000 We also tell men, hey, get help.
00:09:54.000 Don't be afraid to get help.
00:09:55.000 Go and get help.
00:09:56.000 It's brave to take that step.
00:09:57.000 Unless you have someone who wants to take half your stuff, like Amber Heard, in which case, any help that you've ever sought out is now on display for the whole world to see.
00:10:07.000 Right?
00:10:08.000 Your doctor-patient confidentiality goes away in a civil case with a divorce if a woman's trying to use it against you.
00:10:14.000 So, if Johnny Depp wanted to protect himself, rather than do what is expected of him in today's anti-masculine society, is not get help, So there's no record of it.
00:10:24.000 Just say, there's nothing wrong with me.
00:10:26.000 And never cry.
00:10:27.000 And keep it bottled up.
00:10:29.000 And then die much younger than women.
00:10:30.000 That's why life expectancy is what it is.
00:10:33.000 That's what he should have done if he wanted to protect himself.
00:10:36.000 This, we need to pick a lane.
00:10:37.000 And that's why... Apply beers for men.
00:10:39.000 Yes.
00:10:40.000 Except for, uh, well, the Bruce Willis did those wine cooler commercials.
00:10:43.000 Yeah, that's true.
00:10:44.000 He did.
00:10:44.000 Yeah.
00:10:44.000 Well, and look what happened to him.
00:10:46.000 It's true.
00:10:47.000 He needs an earpiece because he can't even remember where he is.
00:10:50.000 Pours orange juice in his cereal.
00:10:51.000 Now, before we go to Amber Heard, I've done that.
00:10:56.000 Put oranges in your cereal.
00:10:57.000 I've done that.
00:10:57.000 I've done that.
00:10:58.000 And I've had to use water, but that had nothing to do with confusion.
00:11:01.000 No.
00:11:01.000 I just didn't have no milk.
00:11:03.000 And Captain, you ever had Captain Crunch dry?
00:11:05.000 Well, it's not dry if there's water.
00:11:07.000 No, but I mean, if you haven't, if you don't use water.
00:11:10.000 If you don't use water.
00:11:11.000 That's why you gotta use water.
00:11:12.000 Yeah.
00:11:12.000 That's my point.
00:11:13.000 Right.
00:11:13.000 Yeah, it's like sandpaper.
00:11:15.000 Oh yeah, you might as well be eating bullets.
00:11:17.000 Yes.
00:11:17.000 I mean, they still taste good.
00:11:19.000 I don't know if bullets taste- Did you know you can season meat with gunpowder?
00:11:21.000 I don't know.
00:11:23.000 One day I'd like to find out how bullets taste.
00:11:26.000 I think we all would.
00:11:27.000 Certainly right now.
00:11:28.000 So.
00:11:31.000 Lake and Nebraska, Springfield, Missouri- Will you pride my funeral?
00:11:34.000 I don't want to be weird.
00:11:37.000 Imagine if you're sitting there crying, if Dave tastes a 380, and we're sitting there at his funeral, and if we start crying, Amber goes, that's weird.
00:11:44.000 Yeah, I remember when I was crying at every funeral, I always had an uncle come up to me and was like, stop being so weird.
00:11:50.000 Stop being weird.
00:11:51.000 This is ridiculous.
00:11:52.000 Come on.
00:11:56.000 You're a step-uncle.
00:11:57.000 The principle's the same.
00:11:58.000 Yeah.
00:11:58.000 When my son's grandfather died, he was like four.
00:12:00.000 I was like, listen.
00:12:02.000 Stop being weird.
00:12:03.000 Yeah.
00:12:03.000 It's ridiculous.
00:12:04.000 Well, you know what?
00:12:05.000 He'll grow up to be a better man.
00:12:06.000 Well, yeah.
00:12:06.000 You have to make sure you bottle it up.
00:12:08.000 Mm-hmm.
00:12:09.000 And that's it.
00:12:09.000 That's it.
00:12:10.000 Bottle it up, and don't let your wife know.
00:12:13.000 That's what I do.
00:12:14.000 Yep.
00:12:15.000 That's what men do.
00:12:16.000 Lesson learned, ladies!
00:12:18.000 You've made us this way!
00:12:19.000 The Amber Herds of the world!
00:12:22.000 Boy!
00:12:22.000 Boy, isn't it wonderful that this was the ambassador for the Me Too movement?
00:12:27.000 There you go!
00:12:27.000 We said chickens would come home to roost.
00:12:29.000 Here we are.
00:12:30.000 Now, speaking of chickens coming home to roost, I don't know if you remember this.
00:12:33.000 We're going to talk about Biden's recent comments about all of you being extremists.
00:12:36.000 So I'll try and get through this relatively quickly so we can get to Amber Heard.
00:12:38.000 Guys in the control room, let me know what she's doing, how she's lying, how bad her acting is.
00:12:42.000 Hopefully she gets a Razzie.
00:12:44.000 But Joe, former Vice President Joe Biden now is referring to all of you as extremists for simply holding a view that the majority of Americans hold.
00:12:49.000 That being said, this is the playbook from the left, right?
00:12:53.000 They always play themselves up to be Captain Unity.
00:12:55.000 They call for civility when they feel as though they're the ones being under attack, and then that goes out the window once they don't get their way.
00:13:02.000 Like children, or Amber Heard, or feminists, but I repeat myself, here we go back to Captain Unity with the most votes ever of any president, wildly popular, 81 million.
00:13:12.000 Let's see.
00:13:13.000 For all those of you who voted for President Trump, I understand the disappointment tonight.
00:13:19.000 I've lost a couple times myself.
00:13:22.000 But now, let's give each other a chance.
00:13:30.000 It's time to put away the harsh rhetoric, lower the temperature, see each other again, listen to each other again.
00:13:39.000 And to make progress, we have to stop treating our opponents as our enemies.
00:13:44.000 They are not our enemies.
00:13:45.000 They're Americans.
00:13:47.000 They're Americans.
00:13:49.000 Well, that's nice.
00:13:50.000 It seems like he really does want what's good for the whole country.
00:13:52.000 Well, yeah, no, right.
00:13:53.000 I can definitely see where the 81 million votes came from.
00:13:56.000 But also, you have to remember he's a complete piece of shit who calls his opponents political extremists.
00:14:02.000 So it's a yin and yang.
00:14:03.000 Oh, right.
00:14:04.000 Yep.
00:14:05.000 For example, it's one of those things.
00:14:07.000 He's weird.
00:14:07.000 Both things can be true.
00:14:09.000 Or in this case, one is a lie and one is true.
00:14:12.000 True.
00:14:13.000 Right.
00:14:14.000 Who's on first?
00:14:15.000 Not him.
00:14:16.000 He doesn't know what first is.
00:14:16.000 He can't count to one.
00:14:19.000 So, here's an example of what he just said about Republicans.
00:14:22.000 I believe this was yesterday, you know, to not vilify your opponents.
00:14:26.000 They're Americans!
00:14:27.000 This is about a lot more than abortion.
00:14:29.000 The idea that somehow there is an inherent right, that there is no right of privacy, that there is no right... Remember the debate we had, you don't remember, but we had a debate about... You don't remember.
00:14:41.000 Griswold versus Connecticut.
00:14:43.000 There'd been a law saying a married couple Could not purchase birth control in the privacy of their own bedroom and use it.
00:14:50.000 Well, that got struck down.
00:14:52.000 Griswold was thought to be a bad decision by Borken.
00:14:56.000 My guess is the guy's on the Supreme Court now.
00:14:59.000 What happens if you have a state change the law saying that children who are LGBTQ can't be in classrooms with other children?
00:15:10.000 Is that legit under the way the decision is written?
00:15:15.000 What are the next things that are going to be attacked?
00:15:18.000 Because this MAGA crowd is really the most extreme political organization that's existed in American history.
00:15:25.000 In recent American history.
00:15:27.000 Come on, Joe, there's good people on both sides.
00:15:30.000 You would think so!
00:15:32.000 MAGA, what he means is, you know, the half that voted to, you know, fewer votes in the most free and fair election of all time, who voted for Donald Trump.
00:15:39.000 I guess they didn't learn from the basket of deplorables.
00:15:42.000 What?
00:15:42.000 LGBTQ kids won't be able to be in schools?
00:15:45.000 No, no, no.
00:15:45.000 Just public school teachers.
00:15:48.000 But I don't understand.
00:15:49.000 Even the woman behind him is like, is this?
00:15:52.000 Oh, God.
00:15:53.000 Yeah, is this?
00:15:54.000 This is the leader of the free world?
00:15:55.000 Is this really what we're doing?
00:15:57.000 Ah, for crying out loud.
00:15:58.000 Can we please just audit the voting machines?
00:16:00.000 No?
00:16:00.000 Okay.
00:16:01.000 Does anyone smell shit?
00:16:02.000 So let me ask you this.
00:16:03.000 While we're talking about extremists on abortion, look, Roe v. Wade, we've done a whole segment on this, okay?
00:16:08.000 We did a whole show on this.
00:16:09.000 If you don't know, the gaslighting works on me!
00:16:13.000 Where sometimes I have to go back and go, wait, hold on a second, maybe I'm missing something.
00:16:17.000 No, no, Roe v. Wade, if it were to be overturned, which it likely will, just means that states can place restrictions on abortions in the first trimester, which they can't do right now.
00:16:26.000 And other states can not.
00:16:29.000 It will allow states to do what they want on abortion.
00:16:30.000 I'm going, yeah, okay, that's it.
00:16:31.000 Oh, alright, okay.
00:16:32.000 So you're lying, but there's, the lying is, I'm telling you it works on me sometimes, where I have to second-guess myself.
00:16:39.000 That's why we make all references available at loudearthcracker.com.
00:16:41.000 You can click the link in the description.
00:16:43.000 So, let me ask you this.
00:16:44.000 Knowing the policy, what is more extreme?
00:16:47.000 You can take the left, of course, you can take Antifa, you can take Black Lives Matter, and then let's say you take the January 6th insurrectionists.
00:16:55.000 Eh, okay.
00:16:56.000 You know what?
00:16:57.000 The scales of asshole?
00:16:59.000 I would still say they lean heavily in one direction.
00:17:02.000 But let's look at abortion right now.
00:17:03.000 Let's look at the extremism, which he is accusing half the country of being.
00:17:08.000 During the 2020 election, there were only two Democratic candidates, two, who said they supported abortion restrictions after 24 weeks.
00:17:22.000 That's six months.
00:17:24.000 I don't know if we have that number on the earliest born baby now, but I'm pretty sure it's right around that number.
00:17:29.000 It's somewhere between 23 and 25 weeks.
00:17:33.000 The argument of viability, or whether it's a life, it doesn't matter to them.
00:17:37.000 Only two Democrat candidates supported abortion restrictions in the third trimester.
00:17:45.000 The fringe with the Democrat is people who don't believe in abortion up until and including birth.
00:17:50.000 There are two out of all Democratic candidates.
00:17:53.000 It was 21 weeks and 5 days.
00:17:54.000 21 weeks and 5 days.
00:17:55.000 Wow.
00:17:55.000 Dang.
00:17:55.000 And they don't believe you should place restrictions after 24 weeks.
00:18:01.000 Just to keep that in context, because we're going to come back to it.
00:18:04.000 What about HR 370, 3755, which was, I think was introduced last year by Judy Chu.
00:18:11.000 I don't choo choo choose you.
00:18:16.000 It would allow abortion up until birth.
00:18:18.000 Let me show you what the bill would have been.
00:18:20.000 Again, while we're talking about extremists, a prohibition on abortion after fetal viability when, in the good faith medical judgment of the treating health care provider, continuation of the pregnancy would pose a risk to the pregnant patient's life or health.
00:18:34.000 What this bill is saying is there should be No allowance for restrictions on abortions even after viability.
00:18:43.000 Acknowledging viability, you still can't place any restrictions on it.
00:18:47.000 Up until birth.
00:18:49.000 I think that's pretty extreme.
00:18:51.000 I think it's more extreme than a heartbeat bill.
00:18:54.000 That's my opinion.
00:18:55.000 I would love to hear the opinion of you if you're, particularly those who are pro-abortion.
00:19:01.000 Because I think Dave has a very reasoned view on it.
00:19:03.000 I don't agree with... Dave and I don't agree on it, but Dave and I both agree that up until and including nine months is extreme.
00:19:10.000 That's the entire Democratic Party except for two people.
00:19:14.000 Seems a bit much.
00:19:16.000 Here's something else that is pretty funny from the same bill.
00:19:19.000 This is what they wrote.
00:19:20.000 They can't trip over their own fake dicks.
00:19:22.000 The terms women and wimp- woman and women are used in this bill to reflect the identity of the majority of people
00:19:29.000 targeted and affected by restrictions on abortion services, and to address squarely the targeted restrictions on
00:19:34.000 abortion which are rooted in misogyny.
00:19:35.000 However, access to abortion services is critical to the health of every person capable of becoming pregnant.
00:19:42.000 So women?
00:19:44.000 Is that how that goes?
00:19:48.000 Don't be obtuse, Dave.
00:19:49.000 Oh, I'm sorry.
00:19:50.000 Men and women.
00:19:51.000 Yes, anyone who can get- Hey, did we get a fact check on this?
00:19:53.000 As far as I know, no man has been- has become pregnant and given birth.
00:19:57.000 I don't know if there's a sixth day science experiment.
00:20:00.000 Uh, I don't know if you've seen the cartoon picture on your phone.
00:20:05.000 Well, you know, okay, Arnold doesn't count.
00:20:06.000 And by the way, Danny DeVito was a horribly absent father.
00:20:09.000 Yeah, he really was.
00:20:12.000 Yeah, see that?
00:20:13.000 That's what we put out there.
00:20:14.000 They have to put this in a bill.
00:20:15.000 That's just me after I drink something bubbly.
00:20:17.000 Yes.
00:20:19.000 They have to put in the bill, health of every person capable of becoming pregnant.
00:20:23.000 So on one side you have people saying, yeah, the MAGA extremists, alright, give it over to the states.
00:20:29.000 And on the other side, you have all Democrats except for two saying abortion up until nine months and including births for not just women but any pregnant persons.
00:20:38.000 Holy shit!
00:20:40.000 You don't get to use the extremist card anymore.
00:20:40.000 Really?
00:20:42.000 You don't even get to use it for the militiamen who are living in the woods eating tree bark.
00:20:47.000 It's still not as extreme.
00:20:49.000 It's not even close!
00:20:50.000 Well, you can't win.
00:20:51.000 Not only can you not win, I shouldn't say that, you can't have a conversation because you hit a dead end anywhere you go.
00:20:59.000 So what about the men that can get pregnant?
00:21:02.000 Was that in Roe v. Wade?
00:21:05.000 Did they bring that up in court?
00:21:06.000 Well, what about... Wade is a guy's name?
00:21:10.000 Yeah, huh?
00:21:11.000 What if there was a Wade who got pregnant?
00:21:12.000 Is there a Wade who got pregnant?
00:21:14.000 I'm just saying, what if?
00:21:15.000 Oh, I mean, Wade sounds like- Wade does definitely not sound like the name of a man who gets pregnant.
00:21:20.000 No, it doesn't.
00:21:21.000 No, it doesn't.
00:21:21.000 The only less pregnant male name would be Wyatt.
00:21:24.000 Yes, yeah, that's not- yeah, there's- it's too manly.
00:21:27.000 It's, uh- A Skyler.
00:21:27.000 No.
00:21:29.000 A Skyler might- Skyler might get pregnant.
00:21:30.000 Pregnant man.
00:21:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:21:31.000 You'd be like, that's- I'm not surprised.
00:21:33.000 Maybe, like, a Gunner?
00:21:34.000 Yeah, possibly.
00:21:36.000 Unless he's, like, from Sweden.
00:21:37.000 But the point is, you know, there are girly names.
00:21:40.000 Don't use girly names.
00:21:41.000 So, Harold.
00:21:42.000 Harold now, not in the 70s.
00:21:44.000 Is there a Carol for men?
00:21:45.000 Oh, Carol O'Connor.
00:21:47.000 Oh, that's right!
00:21:47.000 There used to be an Irish name for men, yeah.
00:21:50.000 Okay.
00:21:50.000 Now, not so much.
00:21:51.000 No, no, I can't imagine.
00:21:52.000 I mean, whoever, if you name your kid Carol, you might as well name them Please Kick My Ass.
00:21:56.000 Now, he cites...
00:21:57.000 Griswold versus Connecticut, right?
00:21:58.000 That's what led to kind of Supreme Court Roe v. Wade.
00:22:01.000 A lot of people have cited this.
00:22:02.000 We have the references available.
00:22:04.000 Look, he mentions the privacy issue of the Constitution.
00:22:09.000 First, let me clarify this.
00:22:10.000 There is no right to privacy in the Constitution.
00:22:13.000 Okay?
00:22:13.000 Let's just be clear about that.
00:22:14.000 Now, that's not saying that you do not have the right to privacy in certain instances.
00:22:17.000 That's not what I'm arguing.
00:22:18.000 But for them to say abortion is a constitutional right because privacy is a constitutional right when neither one of them are.
00:22:27.000 Here's the thing.
00:22:29.000 It's not a privacy issue when they want to, when you look at the bills that they propose.
00:22:34.000 So in other words, right now they're saying it's bad law, the privacy argument, so that states cannot regulate abortion, right?
00:22:41.000 That's the argument from the right.
00:22:43.000 For the left to say, well, the privacy issue makes abortion a constitutional right, and by the way, we acknowledge viability, like the bill I just told you about from Ms.
00:22:52.000 Chu, and you should still be able to kill them anyway.
00:22:54.000 Look, you don't have the right Okay, let me give you an example of a right to privacy.
00:22:59.000 You have the right, uh, there's patient-doctor confidentiality, right?
00:23:03.000 Same thing with lawyer-client confidentiality.
00:23:05.000 Of course, that goes out the window if, uh, you know, you have someone who wants to take, if Amber Heard wants to take half your stuff.
00:23:10.000 Then you have to be filleted open for the world to see, as we're seeing right now.
00:23:12.000 But that goes both ways.
00:23:14.000 There's an instance where you have the right to privacy.
00:23:17.000 The Constitution doesn't have a broad, overreaching right to privacy.
00:23:21.000 That being said, you don't have the right to privately murder somebody.
00:23:25.000 Now, I know not everyone is pro-life and I understand that.
00:23:28.000 However, from their own bill, they have acknowledged that this is a person because they've said no restrictions after viability.
00:23:36.000 I don't think viability is a valid argument.
00:23:40.000 Because a one and a half year old, an eight month old is not viable.
00:23:43.000 It's just inside the womb, outside the womb.
00:23:45.000 You're just talking about location difference at that point.
00:23:47.000 But they've always argued viability.
00:23:47.000 It's semantics.
00:23:49.000 And now they have said, even at the point of viability, you have the right to terminate it.
00:23:56.000 You don't have the right to privately commit murder.
00:24:00.000 I do believe that aborting a six, seven, eight month baby is murder.
00:24:06.000 But they do.
00:24:08.000 So it doesn't matter what I say.
00:24:09.000 They do.
00:24:11.000 That's a slippery slope!
00:24:12.000 Remember how back in the day I said it was a slippery slope when we were talking about same-sex marriage, when we were talking about the idea that men and women were fundamentally interchangeable?
00:24:19.000 Regardless of where you lined up on that, I just said it opens the door here that we no longer have the roles of male, female in society, that really men and women are not, and now here we are, fundamentally interchangeable.
00:24:29.000 When we said, hey, look, hold on a second, you're just talking about people identifying however they want on their identification, well, what's going to happen with sports?
00:24:36.000 They said, well, no, hold on a second, that's just, come on, you're just fearmongering.
00:24:39.000 Well, here we are.
00:24:42.000 If they say you have the right to privacy as it applies to a crime, like murder, like theft, where does that go?
00:24:49.000 If they had their way.
00:24:51.000 It's a crappy argument.
00:24:52.000 It's an extremist argument.
00:24:54.000 And even worse, your former vice president, most popular former vice president ever, goes into a Humanities 101 logical fallacy to make his point.
00:25:07.000 And this one today is the red herring.
00:25:11.000 You guys can run a search on this afterwards.
00:25:12.000 It's a very common logical fallacy.
00:25:14.000 It's where you bring up something that's largely irrelevant to try and take the argument somewhere where you feel more comfortable, effectively.
00:25:19.000 Biden, there, is creating a red herring by saying, you may not remember this in the clip, he just said, what about LGBTQ children?
00:25:26.000 They could be kicked out of classrooms.
00:25:27.000 Hold on!
00:25:28.000 Wait!
00:25:29.000 Just so I'm clear that I'm understanding this, if states have the right To regulate abortion as they see fit in their state, meaning Texas can have a heartbeat bill and Colorado can have abortion up until birth, including birth period, and the federal government doesn't have it under its jurisdiction.
00:25:45.000 If that happens, gay boys won't be allowed in classrooms?
00:25:52.000 Yep.
00:25:55.000 Is there any way to follow this?
00:25:56.000 Nope.
00:25:58.000 Look, of course, they're clearly protected under the Equal Protection Clause.
00:26:02.000 What do they mean though by gay, like, gay kids aren't, what?
00:26:06.000 Drag, well.
00:26:07.000 Like children?
00:26:08.000 Like, well, you know, they're the ones who put on the children drag shows, so that's nice.
00:26:12.000 But I'm just wondering, he's talking about little kids, right?
00:26:15.000 Just to be clear.
00:26:15.000 Yes.
00:26:16.000 For everybody listening.
00:26:17.000 Not teenagers, not, he's talking about little kids.
00:26:20.000 Yeah.
00:26:21.000 The ones he likes.
00:26:22.000 Yeah.
00:26:23.000 So there's not really... Like Applejack's.
00:26:26.000 He eats what he likes.
00:26:27.000 But it's not... Are they really gay?
00:26:30.000 Or are they just silly at that age?
00:26:32.000 Yeah, that's a good point.
00:26:32.000 You know, sometimes they're just a little... All little kids say gay stuff.
00:26:37.000 They're asexual.
00:26:38.000 Yes.
00:26:38.000 When I was a young kid, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.
00:26:41.000 And because I saw that my mom and dad lived together and I roomed with my brother, and then I saw teenagers didn't room together anymore, I was like, well, I really like being his roommate.
00:26:47.000 I want to be his roommate forever.
00:26:48.000 So I said, when I grow up, I want to be a woman so I can marry Jordan and share the same room forever.
00:26:53.000 Well, yeah, and now they'd be like, well, we're gonna make that happen.
00:26:55.000 Right.
00:26:56.000 I mean, my mom did put me on birth control, so she was an early adopter.
00:26:59.000 Well, of course.
00:27:00.000 I've been wearing the birth control patch since I was six.
00:27:03.000 She told me they were Smarties.
00:27:07.000 Fun fact!
00:27:07.000 Smarties, as you know them here in the United States, in Canada, Smarties are just like a generic M&M.
00:27:11.000 Really?
00:27:12.000 And what you know as Smarties, a little like kind of sugar tarts, they're known as Rockets.
00:27:16.000 In Canada?
00:27:17.000 In Canada.
00:27:17.000 It's a silly place.
00:27:18.000 What's wrong with you guys?
00:27:19.000 Oh, there's a lot wrong with us.
00:27:20.000 Have you seen our blackface Prime Minister and the Queen in our money?
00:27:23.000 Well, I've seen that, so yes.
00:27:24.000 Have you seen our military?
00:27:25.000 I've seen your gold coins.
00:27:27.000 Yes.
00:27:27.000 That you're supposed to somehow give to a stripper.
00:27:29.000 Yeah.
00:27:30.000 Loonies and Toonies.
00:27:31.000 They have to wear diapers.
00:27:33.000 That's true.
00:27:33.000 Toonies are silly.
00:27:34.000 Yeah, they are.
00:27:36.000 That's a $2 one.
00:27:38.000 We're the only country, Canada, we have the loonie, which is a single dollar coin, and it's because there's a loon, the bird, on the loonie.
00:27:43.000 That's what they called it.
00:27:44.000 Then they created a $2 coin, which looks like a giant peso, and they said, what do we call it?
00:27:49.000 I know!
00:27:50.000 The toonie!
00:27:51.000 We're a country so silly that our currency is a pun.
00:27:55.000 It also is loony toony.
00:27:57.000 Yes, I know!
00:27:59.000 How did that make it through any kind of legislature?
00:28:01.000 Everyone's like, that's perfect.
00:28:02.000 That's exactly what we need to put us back on the map.
00:28:04.000 God save the queen.
00:28:05.000 People think we're nothing more than America's hat?
00:28:08.000 We'll show them with our plays on words slash currency.
00:28:11.000 It's the toony standard.
00:28:13.000 This is great here.
00:28:15.000 So look, LGBT children going back to Biden, they're clearly protected under the Equal Protection Clause.
00:28:20.000 Let me read this for me.
00:28:21.000 No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States.
00:28:25.000 This has nothing to do with the Due Process Clause.
00:28:28.000 Here's something else that I want to move on to really quickly because Amber Heard isn't on, but there's another person, Olivia Wilde, who is- Newton-John?
00:28:36.000 Olivia Newton-John is.
00:28:39.000 She was hot.
00:28:39.000 She was quite the dish.
00:28:41.000 Yeah.
00:28:41.000 Am I allowed to say that or is that toxic masculinity?
00:28:43.000 It's toxic masculinity.
00:28:44.000 Can we all say that Olivia Newton-John was pretty?
00:28:46.000 Uh, I believe you have to use other terms.
00:28:48.000 And I thought that she was hot as good Sandy more than bad Sandy.
00:28:52.000 Yeah.
00:28:53.000 Really?
00:28:53.000 Yeah.
00:28:54.000 I kinda like bad Sandy.
00:28:55.000 Well, there's a surprise.
00:28:57.000 Bad Sandy.
00:29:00.000 So, we know, look, this is one thing too where he talks about, talks about extremism.
00:29:06.000 The left wants to create an echo, and I want to get through this pretty, but you look at Twitter, you look at how they responded on Twitter with Elon Musk.
00:29:13.000 You look at what they're doing on social media, big tech.
00:29:16.000 We know that the left is Opposed to hearing any views with those they disagree with.
00:29:22.000 So here's a poll we have for you.
00:29:23.000 Nearly one quarter, 24% of Democrats said they blocked, unfriended, or stopped following someone on social media after the election because of their political posts on social media.
00:29:30.000 Fewer than 1 in 10, this means 9% of Republicans, reported doing the same.
00:29:35.000 Look!
00:29:36.000 Former Vice President Biden, he wants the Supreme Court to be an echo chamber.
00:29:39.000 He wants the state legislature to be an echo chamber.
00:29:42.000 He wants Twitter to be an echo chamber.
00:29:45.000 They want Spotify to be an echo chamber.
00:29:47.000 When Jen Psaki is saying we want them to do more to get rid of misinformation, who determines misinformation?
00:29:51.000 The Democrats in power.
00:29:53.000 What's crazy to me is when you see those on the left demanding policies and actions that will continue, that can only result in an echo chamber, and then bitch about an echo chamber to you and say they need more oversight over big tech companies.
00:30:05.000 This is the problem that we run into.
00:30:07.000 They're extremists.
00:30:09.000 Not really.
00:30:10.000 You're in such an echo chamber that only two members of your party thought that once a baby is viable outside of the womb, you still shouldn't stick forceps in its head.
00:30:19.000 You've been in an echo chamber, and you're trying to put everyone else in these same silos, and then bitching about it.
00:30:27.000 Someone wants to call me an extremist?
00:30:29.000 Okay, fine.
00:30:29.000 I guess I'm an extremist.
00:30:30.000 Go ahead.
00:30:31.000 Slap that label on me.
00:30:32.000 Put me on your watch list.
00:30:33.000 It's true.
00:30:34.000 It's true.
00:30:34.000 I believe that states have the rights.
00:30:36.000 If I had my way, I think that abortion should largely be outlawed, certainly the way that it's practiced across the country.
00:30:40.000 But you know what?
00:30:41.000 I'll take it going to the states.
00:30:42.000 Guess I'm an extremist.
00:30:44.000 Hit me for treason.
00:30:45.000 How about the rest of you?
00:30:46.000 Hands up.
00:30:47.000 Hands up.
00:30:48.000 Comment.
00:30:48.000 Who's an extremist?
00:30:50.000 That you shouldn't kill a baby?
00:30:52.000 Yeah.
00:30:53.000 Like, an out-of-the-womb nine-month?
00:30:55.000 Well, even in the womb seven months.
00:30:58.000 I would say, uh, I would say, yeah, you probably shouldn't do that.
00:31:00.000 Okay, well, there you go.
00:31:01.000 Extremist.
00:31:03.000 All of us.
00:31:05.000 It's like a 90's skateboarding advertisement.
00:31:08.000 Extreme!
00:31:09.000 You should be able to choose by then, you're not picking a restaurant.
00:31:12.000 Have you seen how wide my pant legs are?
00:31:15.000 Extreme!
00:31:16.000 At Sears!
00:31:17.000 Yes, let's go chase tornadoes.
00:31:20.000 Extreme!
00:31:22.000 Finger of God.
00:31:23.000 This super soaker has two streams.
00:31:25.000 It's extreme!
00:31:27.000 The bigger those got, the worse they were.
00:31:29.000 Yeah, I know.
00:31:30.000 The original Super Soaker?
00:31:32.000 Oh, you could kill someone with that spray.
00:31:33.000 It lasted forever because it was so concentrated.
00:31:35.000 Yeah.
00:31:36.000 It was like being in a submarine with a leak.
00:31:37.000 It just... Oh, it's great.
00:31:39.000 And then they just kept adding stuff to it and you're like, this is stupid.
00:31:42.000 It breaks and it leaks.
00:31:43.000 I don't want a backpack.
00:31:44.000 No, I don't need to carry all this stuff.
00:31:46.000 Yeah.
00:31:46.000 All I knew was it was good for me to know who had the backpack super soaker because I could hit them first because I knew their dad was rich.
00:31:51.000 Yeah, of course, that's true.
00:31:53.000 It was like $200.
00:31:53.000 Yeah, and then steal their, uh, what was that little car that my parents would never buy me?
00:31:58.000 Power wheels.
00:31:59.000 Oh, yeah.
00:31:59.000 Yeah.
00:32:00.000 I would just look at my friends drive those and never have one.
00:32:03.000 Yeah, well, you can also just steal them, or at least the hubcaps.
00:32:06.000 Yeah, well, that's why my son got a Corvette and a Cadillac.
00:32:09.000 Well, there's a Mattel ad you won't see.
00:32:12.000 In Detroit, a Power Wheels carjacking.
00:32:14.000 Oh yeah, it will happen.
00:32:16.000 What am I, I'm just on cinder blocks, what happened?
00:32:20.000 Hey, it does kind of smell in here still.
00:32:22.000 I was going to say, it does.
00:32:24.000 It does stink.
00:32:25.000 It does.
00:32:25.000 I don't know if it's leftover.
00:32:26.000 There's still an odor.
00:32:27.000 You know what, I think that it's going to be time to, people know that we've had someone pooping in the office, a copycat pooper from Amber Heard, and I think it's time to put on my detective hat.
00:32:38.000 Oh my word.
00:32:40.000 Alright.
00:32:42.000 Now Dave, you've been following us as well.
00:32:52.000 I have been.
00:32:54.000 Okay.
00:32:54.000 We've had someone who's been emulating Amber Heard as a poppycat, copycat, poopycat, pooper, poopycat, here in the office.
00:33:01.000 It began with a mug, then it was on our chair, and now, as you see, clearly under my hat.
00:33:06.000 Which, by the way, we won't get that deposit back.
00:33:07.000 This is a rental.
00:33:08.000 And I had my suspicions in the office, and many of you at Mug Club have had your suspicions and submitted them.
00:33:17.000 But I believe that we've been wrong all along.
00:33:19.000 Oh?
00:33:20.000 In assuming that the pooper was amongst us.
00:33:24.000 And, dare I say, assuming that the pooper was a copycat.
00:33:29.000 That's foreshadowing.
00:33:30.000 I'm like Steinbeck.
00:33:30.000 Here's the thing.
00:33:32.000 I, of course, first suspected Brendan, because he is Very little self-control, and seems to find these things funny due to a sophomoric sense of humor.
00:33:42.000 But, had to rule that out, the moment that I saw, the fecal transplant that we had on Monday was littered with payday bars!
00:33:50.000 And as you well know, Dave... Allergic to peanuts.
00:33:54.000 Allergic to peanuts.
00:33:55.000 There aren't enough EpiPens in the world.
00:33:57.000 So my suspicions then moved... to Maximus!
00:34:03.000 For he had both The opportunity and the motivation.
00:34:08.000 However, realizing that he's a 4'7 Mexican, the volume of the fecal matter was far too much to have been expelled from his orifice.
00:34:15.000 That's very true.
00:34:16.000 And that led me to a very likely suspect.
00:34:20.000 You yourself, Dave!
00:34:21.000 Well... Everybody knows that I've been covering for you for years as you take your bathroom break as we go to YouTube, and it's always more than an enlarged prostate, but often a mud pie.
00:34:34.000 Well, it's true.
00:34:35.000 And believe me, it's not solid the way that it's been with- around the office.
00:34:38.000 That's what got you off the hook.
00:34:40.000 I know.
00:34:41.000 There is far too much of a shape to this poop.
00:34:45.000 IBS doesn't- It's bordering on polygonal.
00:34:47.000 Yes.
00:34:48.000 There's no, uh, rice hold.
00:34:51.000 And then naturally, of course, uh, suspect, uh, because yesterday we had Douglas Murray, who was sitting in that very chair.
00:34:56.000 I suspected him!
00:34:58.000 But then I realized that was only my internalized homophobia due to Tokunawan's constant jokes about Lou Sphincter.
00:35:04.000 I really thought he was the poop-traitor.
00:35:06.000 I know.
00:35:06.000 No, I think something fell out of his pant leg when he got out of his car.
00:35:10.000 But there's one thing that we missed all along, Dave.
00:35:14.000 Yes?
00:35:15.000 And it stood out at me.
00:35:17.000 Go on.
00:35:18.000 Like your faulty shaven mustache, I noticed a hair in this poop itself!
00:35:26.000 What?
00:35:27.000 No way.
00:35:28.000 Knowing of course that this hair, thick and luscious, could not be Dave's.
00:35:31.000 You're not capable of growing such a mustache.
00:35:33.000 Doesn't have the testosterone.
00:35:34.000 Capable.
00:35:35.000 Apologies.
00:35:35.000 I did.
00:35:36.000 I did.
00:35:37.000 There's only one in this office, and that was Thomas Finnegan.
00:35:41.000 And I searched and found a DNA match.
00:35:42.000 It is Thomas Finnegan's DNA.
00:35:44.000 Mr. Finnegan, do you have something to tell me?
00:35:49.000 It wasn't me.
00:35:50.000 Take a look.
00:35:51.000 Right here.
00:35:53.000 Take a look.
00:35:55.000 Take a look.
00:35:56.000 I did it!
00:35:59.000 You've been crapping in this office the whole time!
00:36:02.000 No, no, it wasn't me.
00:36:04.000 You think it's a funny joke and it's not!
00:36:09.000 You have no proof.
00:36:10.000 Do we have any proof, Tim?
00:36:12.000 Actually, yeah, I think we do.
00:36:15.000 This chemo wig fell off.
00:36:18.000 Oh my goodness.
00:36:23.000 It was Amber Heard all along.
00:36:25.000 You've been dating Amber Heard?
00:36:34.000 She's as innocent as the fallen snow.
00:36:36.000 Dammit!
00:36:37.000 Thomas Finnegan!
00:36:38.000 She has you under her tread!
00:36:39.000 Stop standing up for her!
00:36:40.000 No!
00:36:40.000 No!
00:36:41.000 I love her!
00:36:42.000 I love her!
00:36:44.000 That was far too short of a stinger.
00:36:52.000 I got it.
00:36:55.000 Bye.
00:36:56.000 Please stop bringing Amber around the office.
00:36:59.000 I know!
00:37:00.000 She was here and we didn't even know it!
00:37:01.000 Apologies, Finnegan.
00:37:02.000 I was just feeling the slap.
00:37:04.000 They may have worked together.
00:37:05.000 Maybe he was just bringing it in in a Ziploc.
00:37:08.000 Uh, I will need a towel.
00:37:11.000 I didn't realize I spilled my whole mug.
00:37:13.000 There's a whole mug spilled on the desk.
00:37:15.000 Yes, a whole mug spilled on the desk.
00:37:17.000 Are we going to Amber Heard now?
00:37:18.000 I think we should go to Amber Heard.
00:37:19.000 Okay, we're gonna go to Amber Heard again.
00:37:20.000 The reason that we are discussing this is because it's a study in sociopathic behavior and misandry.
00:37:27.000 We do right now have a problem.
00:37:28.000 This is a rebound to the believe all women.
00:37:30.000 We should believe some women.
00:37:33.000 But everyone deserves their day in court.
00:37:36.000 And right now it's not going very well for Amber Heard.
00:37:37.000 So let's see what she- Oh, look!
00:37:39.000 She decided to dress like the caretaker from The Orphanage.
00:37:41.000 Well, I think we need to listen to an accusation.
00:37:43.000 Yes.
00:37:43.000 And then have due process.
00:37:45.000 Yes, exactly.
00:37:46.000 That's with anybody.
00:37:47.000 Right.
00:37:47.000 Unless it's painfully obvious and we're like, we all saw it.
00:37:50.000 Yes, exactly.
00:37:52.000 Like looking at Amber Heard's face.
00:37:54.000 Really what's sad about it is it's like, you're an actress?
00:37:57.000 I know!
00:37:59.000 How many takes do you do?
00:38:00.000 I know!
00:38:01.000 Who's your coach, Bridget Nielsen?
00:38:03.000 Right, it's really not good.
00:38:05.000 Okay, let's see what she's saying right now.
00:38:07.000 In New York.
00:38:08.000 It's a fashion event, but it's just a major red carpet event.
00:38:12.000 Sounds like hell.
00:38:15.000 And you have to be invited, and it's kind of a thing.
00:38:21.000 And we were invited that year, and I had already gone for the previous year or two.
00:38:29.000 Oh no, we are going to play a drinking game?
00:38:32.000 Oh my god.
00:38:35.000 Any time there's an objection, any time she cries.
00:38:38.000 Can I see it?
00:38:39.000 Yeah, sorry about that.
00:38:40.000 Bring it up again.
00:38:43.000 Anytime she cries, anytime there's an appeal to sexism, anytime a movie is mentioned, or anytime Johnny Depp laughs.
00:38:50.000 Is she promoting a new film?
00:38:51.000 Finish the drink.
00:38:53.000 If Johnny Depp laughs, we have to finish the drink?
00:38:54.000 Yeah.
00:38:55.000 And of course, since Dave is back, since he's been on the wagon for a long time, you'll just have to take a diuretic.
00:39:00.000 That's fine.
00:39:01.000 No.
00:39:02.000 I can drink this tea right here.
00:39:04.000 We'll call it tea.
00:39:05.000 Yes.
00:39:06.000 Yes.
00:39:07.000 Opium tea.
00:39:08.000 Yes.
00:39:09.000 I too once fell under the spell of opium.
00:39:12.000 Bet.
00:39:13.000 It's not a drug if it's opium.
00:39:15.000 That's what I've always- It comes from a leaf!
00:39:17.000 Yes.
00:39:17.000 Flower.
00:39:18.000 The natural plant.
00:39:19.000 It's like the coca leaf.
00:39:20.000 Let's see what she says.
00:39:24.000 So you'd make a point and then he would go on to a different accusation.
00:39:30.000 But I remember that what started it is this accusation that I had been flirting at this event.
00:39:37.000 We get back to the hotel room and Johnny shoves me and kind of grabs me by the collarbone area, like not really my neck, but top of my neck.
00:39:50.000 Top of my, above my collarbone, below my neck.
00:39:54.000 Top of your Amish scarf.
00:39:55.000 Yes.
00:39:56.000 I think at that point when we were still in the living room I shook him back.
00:39:59.000 Right now she's living with Harrison Ford in witness.
00:40:01.000 But I don't really recall too many specifics.
00:40:05.000 I remember he threw a bottle at me.
00:40:06.000 It missed me but broke the chandelier.
00:40:08.000 That's pretty specific.
00:40:10.000 That's pretty specific.
00:40:10.000 And at some point... That's an angle of attack!
00:40:13.000 I don't remember specifics but it ricocheted.
00:40:15.000 You only remember bits and pieces of the most violent fight I've heard between a married couple so far.
00:40:20.000 Johnny and I are in a struggle in the living room and he kind of like shoves me down on the sofa and I get up and I'm trying to get him off of me and he's just stronger than me.
00:40:31.000 I don't know how else to describe it.
00:40:33.000 And at some point, he just whacks me in the face.
00:40:37.000 And I had not, at the time, been, like, I didn't, I think that was the first time I was like, is this a broken nose?
00:40:46.000 At the time, I was unsure what that feeling was, but I suspected.
00:40:50.000 Kind of like, well, now you're going to know what it's like to have a broken career.
00:40:53.000 And other than that, I was relatively unscathed.
00:40:58.000 But I remember other than that, that's such a okay talk about
00:41:02.000 Trying to play coy I mean, I don't know what he threw a bottle and it bounced
00:41:07.000 off and it broke the chandelier and he broke my nose But other than that, I was unscathed trying to present
00:41:12.000 herself as beautiful and brave while also presenting herself as the victim. I'm sorry
00:41:16.000 but drink And just so you can see, that is in fact Cinco de Mayo Cerveza, which is... By the way, you need to go to Dave's Chandeliers, where we hang them.
00:41:26.000 Yes.
00:41:26.000 Directly.
00:41:27.000 A beer bottle's not gonna take down the line.
00:41:29.000 They're mineral spirit bottle-proof.
00:41:30.000 Yes.
00:41:31.000 What are mineral spirits?
00:41:32.000 I've heard that mentioned so many times in the... Do you know what mineral spirits are?
00:41:35.000 I think you know I don't.
00:41:36.000 Okay.
00:41:37.000 I figured, you know, neither one of us are that cultured, but you did consume substances, I thought.
00:41:43.000 I can't... maybe?
00:41:45.000 I've had it, but I honestly have no idea off the top of my head what it is.
00:41:48.000 Is it like Angostura Bitters?
00:41:49.000 Can someone bring that up?
00:41:50.000 I know you can light a fire with it.
00:41:52.000 Turpentine, Turpentine Substitute, and Petroleum Spirits.
00:41:57.000 I'm sorry, so it's gasoline?
00:41:59.000 And they were drinking it?
00:42:00.000 That's a nice mixer.
00:42:01.000 Is that correct?
00:42:01.000 Yes, I will have the gas- I will have the 87 octane old-fashioned.
00:42:06.000 Yes, what kind of hotel rooms do you have?
00:42:08.000 I'm going to need huffing rags and a chandelier.
00:42:10.000 Yes, and don't forget my- Bottles for throwing.
00:42:13.000 Don't forget our two diesel martini lunch.
00:42:15.000 Yes.
00:42:17.000 Let's see what she's saying here.
00:42:18.000 Who are you filming those?
00:42:20.000 In New York.
00:42:20.000 Okay.
00:42:21.000 And where was Mr. Depp at that time?
00:42:24.000 Johnny was in L.A.
00:42:26.000 at the time.
00:42:27.000 Indoors, wearing sunglasses.
00:42:28.000 And then eventually went on location for his movie, Black Mass, in Boston.
00:42:32.000 He was at Hot Topic, looking at the wrap of bracelets, saying, I'll have all of them.
00:42:36.000 Eventually, by May of 2014.
00:42:38.000 No need for the receipts, I'm walking out with them.
00:42:41.000 And what, if any, discussions or arguments did you have with Mr. Depp relating to James Franco?
00:42:48.000 In that time frame of May 2014.
00:42:49.000 Oh my God!
00:42:54.000 That's a lie by face!
00:42:56.000 Drink!
00:42:56.000 Yeah.
00:42:57.000 Because she has to think about her answer.
00:42:59.000 It's a nightmare.
00:43:00.000 Um...
00:43:01.000 Well, if it's a nightmare, say it.
00:43:08.000 I wanted to do this independent film.
00:43:11.000 I... God!
00:43:13.000 I liked the story.
00:43:14.000 I liked the character.
00:43:18.000 Was the character a raging bitch?
00:43:21.000 It was!
00:43:22.000 They saw a lot of me in that character!
00:43:24.000 Hey Luna, can I have a beer?
00:43:28.000 Guys, you guys are in charge of her!
00:43:29.000 We have no idea what's going on!
00:43:32.000 He's not even playing the drinking game, he just wants to be drunk.
00:43:37.000 What's the over-under on Johnny Depp having a flask in that suit jacket?
00:43:42.000 Hey, by the way, I think we can probably grab another channel that just has the stream going on.
00:43:45.000 This is a network.
00:43:46.000 There are channels on YouTube that have it going non-stop, so we don't have to wait for a commercial break.
00:43:51.000 But just that, it was a nightmare.
00:43:54.000 Here, let me just show you one thing.
00:43:56.000 So, control room, pull up the James Franco clip of them in the elevator.
00:43:58.000 Keep in mind, and this is where the lie gets built upon the lie and the lie and the lie, Amber Heard had to fire her, or she chose to fire her PR firm.
00:44:06.000 Not a good idea in the middle of a case.
00:44:07.000 Here's a big reason why.
00:44:09.000 When, of course, it was alleged that she had cheated on Johnny Depp with James Franco, her attorney said they just happened to be in the same elevator together.
00:44:17.000 Well, if you watch the tape, you can clearly see not only do they try and avoid the camera, but they sort of cuddle by putting their heads together, and they only go to the penthouse, which can only be reached by the person who lives in the penthouse, or the person has to be with them.
00:44:30.000 James Franco was not getting off at any other floor.
00:44:32.000 So they present an argument, And then, okay, you see the footage.
00:44:36.000 Then they present another argument.
00:44:37.000 Well, they were just friends, and Johnny Depp was paranoid.
00:44:40.000 And so that becomes more clinical level of gaslighting.
00:44:42.000 It's, well, we just happen to be in the same elevator.
00:44:44.000 Yeah, but you went to the same place.
00:44:45.000 Well, we're just friends.
00:44:47.000 But you didn't say that you were friends.
00:44:48.000 You said that you happened to be in the same elevator.
00:44:50.000 And the story keeps changing if you haven't been following it since the beginning.
00:44:54.000 So whenever they get that, you guys can bring it up.
00:44:56.000 But let's hear her talking more.
00:44:57.000 Look, she's making the face.
00:44:59.000 Yeah, I just... I can't believe a Hollywood romance didn't work out.
00:45:08.000 Oh no!
00:45:09.000 She's a regular Rosa Parks!
00:45:11.000 I got that, uh, video.
00:45:13.000 I'm like, BITCH!
00:45:14.000 SIT IN THE BACK OF THE PRIVATE LEARJET!
00:45:16.000 NOW!
00:45:18.000 Here they are, cuddling in the elevator.
00:45:19.000 Oh yeah, here we go, let's bring this up.
00:45:23.000 You can bring the music down a little bit.
00:45:25.000 But this is, keep in mind, right?
00:45:27.000 They just happen to be in the same elevator, was a legal argument.
00:45:29.000 Only one floor is hit, the penthouse.
00:45:31.000 She's in a robe, I believe this is three in the morning.
00:45:33.000 Yeah, her and James Franco don't know each other.
00:45:36.000 Yeah, that's a normal way to... That's how you... Yeah.
00:45:39.000 It's good acting on both your parts, by the way.
00:45:42.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:45:43.000 He's just like, geez, Amber Heard, I didn't know that you were banging Elon Musk.
00:45:48.000 So, if you keep having sex with Elon Musk, I'll never get you a part in my movie.
00:45:53.000 If we go far back into the left, it's like we're not together.
00:45:56.000 Yeah.
00:45:57.000 By the way, when you zoom out, there's just Jay Baruchel masturbating.
00:45:59.000 Yeah.
00:46:02.000 I didn't want to be a sad sack or a worry wart.
00:46:04.000 All right, let's see what she's lying about now.
00:46:07.000 And I just look at him one more time, wanting to penetrate the monster to see the man I love underneath that.
00:46:18.000 You wanted to be penetrated by his monster.
00:46:21.000 And he tells me to hurry up again.
00:46:23.000 Penetrating the monster.
00:46:25.000 Who talks like this?
00:46:27.000 No one.
00:46:27.000 I walk away from him.
00:46:30.000 My back is turned to him and I feel this.
00:46:33.000 Does the record show that her back was in fact turned to the monster?
00:46:36.000 In my back.
00:46:38.000 Is it penetrative?
00:46:39.000 It kicked me.
00:46:41.000 In the back.
00:46:42.000 Kicked me in the back?
00:46:44.000 I fell to the floor.
00:46:45.000 I caught myself on the floor and I just felt like I was looking at the Floor?
00:46:50.000 Floor of the plane.
00:46:51.000 You didn't feel like you were looking at the floor of the plane.
00:46:55.000 I thought to myself, I don't know what to do.
00:46:57.000 I think we should drink when Johnny's glasses come off.
00:46:59.000 Alright.
00:47:00.000 Drink when Johnny's glasses come off.
00:47:02.000 Is that the rules?
00:47:04.000 No, but that's a good one.
00:47:08.000 You could hear a pin drop on that plane.
00:47:11.000 You could feel the tension, but no one did anything.
00:47:14.000 This didn't happen, probably.
00:47:15.000 I just remember feeling so embarrassed.
00:47:20.000 Nobody on the plane was like, could you stop kicking your wife?
00:47:24.000 Alright, hold on a second.
00:47:25.000 That's a crank.
00:47:26.000 That's a cry also.
00:47:27.000 She's using, by the way.
00:47:31.000 She's using language that she believes she's... No one who is kicked in the back, on a plane, in front of people, abused, their first instinct is embarrassed.
00:47:40.000 What she's trying to emulate is when people say, hey, a lot of rape victims feel shame afterwards, particularly if it's some kind of relationship where maybe things went too far and they feel as though they were guilted and they were blaming their outfit or were they... That is true and it's wrong for people to feel shame about that, but for her to say, I had the shit kicked out of me on an airplane in front of people, and I just felt ashamed and embarrassed.
00:48:00.000 That's not a genuine emotion.
00:48:01.000 She's trying to copy emotions she thinks she should feel.
00:48:04.000 Yeah, and especially during the act of it, that's not how you feel.
00:48:08.000 No, you get mad, you get scared.
00:48:10.000 And you get, you're gonna get helped.
00:48:12.000 Yes.
00:48:13.000 There's no- I don't know who you were on the plane with, but anybody's gonna be like, dude, what are you doing?
00:48:17.000 Yeah.
00:48:18.000 There's no- I can't imagine.
00:48:20.000 Even the pilot's probably looking back like, I think we should land this.
00:48:23.000 Yeah, I think this is- I don't know if this certifies as an air emergency, but we don't have any marshals on here.
00:48:28.000 Yeah, the guy who looks like he's in a band is kicking his wife.
00:48:36.000 Um, and he continued to drink and then eventually, um, started howling like an animal and passed out in the bathroom with the door locked.
00:48:50.000 Okay, he's just kind of laughing right there.
00:48:51.000 Yeah, yeah, he just laughed.
00:48:52.000 So, hold on a second.
00:48:53.000 The way she told the story is this.
00:48:55.000 He laughed, uh... Plainfield... Yeah, he did laugh.
00:48:57.000 Yeah, he did.
00:48:58.000 Oh, God.
00:49:01.000 We need another beer for Steven.
00:49:02.000 I think he mouth started howling There's a little too much frost but aside from that it's
00:49:12.000 empty okay One of the pilots is like, is somebody howling back there?
00:49:16.000 Yeah, it's just a guy who's just kicked his wife to the ground.
00:49:19.000 He's now howling like a wolf.
00:49:20.000 Jack Sparrow.
00:49:21.000 Yeah.
00:49:21.000 She wants us to believe that it was this.
00:49:23.000 It was a She felt embarrassed.
00:49:25.000 Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo How can that count for speculation?
00:49:50.000 I'll sustain rejection.
00:49:53.000 Son of a bitch.
00:49:53.000 Let's go to Defendants 221.
00:49:54.000 Guys, we need someone to sign that we have like three more drinks here and nothing to drink!
00:50:00.000 Dave, what do you want to drink?
00:50:01.000 Do you want a... Oh, I have something down here.
00:50:03.000 I have some extra I can pour in.
00:50:07.000 Now I just drank the foam.
00:50:09.000 My day's ruined.
00:50:12.000 But I mean, at this point, it might as well be pee every time this happens.
00:50:15.000 Yes, exactly.
00:50:17.000 By the way, he also peed on her in the middle of the plane, and no one did anything.
00:50:19.000 He goes, you like it!
00:50:21.000 She likes it!
00:50:21.000 And she's like, why won't anyone do anything?
00:50:23.000 He's like, we're not going to do anything.
00:50:24.000 We're not human beings.
00:50:25.000 Yes, there's Trump peeing on Russian prostitutes on the other side of the plane.
00:50:30.000 It's nuts.
00:50:31.000 It's like people who are just living their life with no accountability, like the left or like someone like Amber Heard, they just always overreach with a lie.
00:50:39.000 Well, you have Johnny Depp who, like, he trashed a hotel in the 80s when he was young, which was a party.
00:50:45.000 It wasn't him solo.
00:50:47.000 And then every woman who's ever dated him is like, yeah, he's not abusive.
00:50:47.000 Right.
00:50:51.000 No.
00:50:51.000 Well, it's like, you know what, Justin Bieber.
00:50:53.000 Justin Bieber, when I've seen him recently, he was 14, he was 15, he did stupid things.
00:50:57.000 He seems like a decent guy now.
00:50:58.000 Yeah.
00:50:59.000 Really, I don't have any hate for Justin Bieber.
00:51:01.000 I used to think he was a dick.
00:51:01.000 I'm like, what would happen if you were 15 and you had $500 million?
00:51:07.000 Who was it?
00:51:08.000 The guy from Lonely Island, SNL, said it perfectly.
00:51:11.000 He's 19 years old and has $100 million.
00:51:14.000 I can only imagine the trouble I would get in if I was 19 and had $100.
00:51:18.000 You know, you gotta give him a little bit of slack for being young.
00:51:18.000 Right, yeah, exactly.
00:51:21.000 Yeah.
00:51:21.000 You can't just be mad at somebody because they're doing the same dumb stuff you are, but have way more access to things.
00:51:27.000 Though he's still wearing the same dumb things, Johnny Depp.
00:51:30.000 Well, he's, well... You know why I think he's a decent man?
00:51:34.000 Because he's very close friends with Alice Cooper, who is a supremely decent man.
00:51:37.000 Well, he knows a lot of comics, and I know, uh, dude, a lot of people know him, and I've never heard bad things about Johnny Depp until now.
00:51:44.000 The only thing that I will say is, uh, we were extras in the film The Secret Window, or my dad was.
00:51:48.000 He was very nice, but he faked like he could speak French, and he can't.
00:51:52.000 Yeah, that doesn't make him bad, but I do see that.
00:51:54.000 It makes him want to be pretentious a little bit.
00:51:57.000 Well, yeah, there's always a pretentious.
00:51:59.000 All right.
00:51:59.000 Speaking of pretentious, let's go back to The Nun.
00:52:01.000 Have you ever met an actor that wasn't pretentious, though?
00:52:04.000 Like, a good actor?
00:52:07.000 Clint Eastwood.
00:52:09.000 Have you met Clint Eastwood?
00:52:10.000 Eric Roberts.
00:52:12.000 Eric Roberts is awesome.
00:52:13.000 He's a great actor.
00:52:13.000 He's done crap, but he was not pretentious.
00:52:15.000 I love Eric Roberts.
00:52:18.000 Eric's cool as hell.
00:52:19.000 Patrick Warburton.
00:52:22.000 Yeah, I did meet Patrick Warburton.
00:52:23.000 I met him too.
00:52:25.000 No, but your point stands.
00:52:26.000 Yeah.
00:52:27.000 For the most part.
00:52:28.000 Yeah.
00:52:29.000 Well, Eric Roberts is just cool.
00:52:30.000 He just says yes to everything.
00:52:32.000 Right.
00:52:32.000 He did my friend's movie on Christmas because it was the only day he wasn't working.
00:52:36.000 And he goes, what do you want me to pay you?
00:52:38.000 And he goes, I'd like an omelet.
00:52:41.000 We should do that as an intro.
00:52:42.000 I can't believe we haven't done a Pope of Greenwich Village.
00:52:44.000 I did write a Pope of Greenwich Village one that I need to send in.
00:52:48.000 I took my time.
00:52:49.000 I took my time.
00:52:50.000 We should do that as an intro.
00:52:52.000 I can't believe we haven't done a Pope of Greenwich Village.
00:52:54.000 I did write a Pope of Greenwich Village one that I need to send in because I just I'm
00:52:58.000 like, I think we talked about it on air.
00:52:59.000 Oh, I don't think you and I are the only two people who know that film.
00:53:02.000 Really?
00:53:04.000 Well, Ken does, for sure.
00:53:05.000 Okay.
00:53:06.000 But I'd like to know, well, Bryce probably does, but there's not a lot of people that know that movie.
00:53:11.000 It's not great, but there are some great performances.
00:53:13.000 I love that movie.
00:53:14.000 I like it.
00:53:14.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:53:15.000 But there are some plot holes, for sure.
00:53:18.000 It's definitely got way too long of shots.
00:53:21.000 There's a lot of 80s issues with it, but I do love that film.
00:53:25.000 You know who's gonna have issues when they're 80?
00:53:27.000 This sociopath right here.
00:53:27.000 here. Let's see what she has to say.
00:53:31.000 Hey, we need some more beer.
00:53:48.000 Oh, this is a tape of Johnny Depp howling like an animal.
00:53:52.000 What it really means is he was moaning in pain.
00:53:57.000 And hey, by the way, this is a guy who had an opiate addiction because he lost his finger.
00:54:01.000 My point here that I'm making, you guys can listen, this isn't new, the him howling.
00:54:04.000 Johnny Depp did it, I'm sorry.
00:54:05.000 Yeah, he had an opiate addiction, yeah.
00:54:06.000 Well, I knew that, but what about his finger?
00:54:08.000 Well, yeah, she threw a bottle of vodka at him, a handle of vodka, that's what severed his finger.
00:54:12.000 Oh, that's right, that's what happened.
00:54:13.000 He had to have surgery, and then he got Mercy, he got staff, which I didn't realize how severe it was when I got it in my foot two years ago.
00:54:21.000 You can get sepsis, it's really, really bad.
00:54:24.000 Well, you can easily die from it.
00:54:25.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:54:25.000 Absolutely you can, yeah.
00:54:26.000 And, uh, so he was in pain.
00:54:28.000 Now, remember we always tell people, oh, mental health, oh, addiction health, right?
00:54:31.000 We tell people to get help, and they should.
00:54:33.000 Yes.
00:54:34.000 If you have an opiate addiction.
00:54:35.000 But do you think that people are going to be open with their opiate addiction if right now he's being condemned for it?
00:54:41.000 Sure, it sounds like he was drunk.
00:54:42.000 By the way, it doesn't sound violent.
00:54:44.000 He sounds like, uh, in pain.
00:54:46.000 It does sound pathetic, and I'm sure that's embarrassing for Johnny Depp.
00:54:49.000 But do you think that people, men or women, are more likely or less likely to get help If you decide to embarrass him on a public stage in order to try and extort them for money.
00:54:58.000 Well, of course.
00:54:59.000 And I mean, the problem is, is it's still extremely stigmatized.
00:55:03.000 Yeah.
00:55:03.000 And any time that you can bring in any sort of a legal activity, even if it's legally prescribed, he may have obtained it in a different way.
00:55:12.000 And that's the problem, is any time that you can talk about addiction, no matter what it was with him, he could be overspending whatever you can find on somebody that they can admit to.
00:55:22.000 You know what, here let's... It can be anything, it can be... Because that's a really good point, and I think a lot, and I, honestly Dave, I really do appreciate when you're open about this, because I, you know, we've talked in private, I'm like, I don't want to bring up the addiction stuff.
00:55:33.000 Oh, it's fine.
00:55:33.000 And I think that you help a lot of people when you discuss this.
00:55:36.000 Well, thank you.
00:55:37.000 And I think we've both discussed having mental health issues in the past.
00:55:39.000 We both have, because I don't want it to only come up when it's political football.
00:55:43.000 When people say, usually mental health only comes up when it's a school shooting, and one side wants to say, oh it's not guns, it's mental health.
00:55:49.000 The right does that.
00:55:50.000 And then the left says we don't want to stigmatize mental health if some celebrity commits suicide.
00:55:54.000 But then the left uses it against people. The society in general uses it against people.
00:55:58.000 And I think there's a difference between judgment, which is a good thing,
00:56:02.000 and stigmatizing and shame. In other words, we all need to make judgments. You cross the street,
00:56:06.000 you're making a judgment. Sooner or later, you're making a judgment yourself that you have a
00:56:10.000 problem. You have a problem with whatever it is, pills, heroin, I don't know what it is, whatever
00:56:16.000 drug it is, could be alcohol. Sooner or later, you're making a judgment. But someone should be
00:56:20.000 able to make a judgment, bring their judgment to someone else and get help. When they bring it to
00:56:25.000 someone who can help them...
00:56:27.000 And then that's used against them.
00:56:29.000 That's when you end up stigmatizing people.
00:56:31.000 And that's what's happening right now.
00:56:33.000 Well, and also if you have like a court order, you know, obviously that is a judgment, but even you actually follow it and you go, okay, this is something that I realized I've made a mistake.
00:56:42.000 I want to change my life.
00:56:43.000 They can use that court order against you and you're treated like a criminal instead of an addict.
00:56:48.000 Right.
00:56:48.000 So, because sometimes you have to hit rock bottom and rock bottom comes in a lot of different ugly ways.
00:56:54.000 Yeah.
00:56:55.000 But you're right.
00:56:55.000 I mean, I have several mental health issues.
00:56:57.000 Pirates of the Caribbean 4.
00:56:59.000 Yes.
00:57:00.000 Well, yeah.
00:57:01.000 You don't turn... Well, for that money... Rock Bottom.
00:57:04.000 That's down with Davey's Locker.
00:57:05.000 Oh, please.
00:57:06.000 I'll do 30 of those.
00:57:08.000 Yeah.
00:57:08.000 I'll play a waiter.
00:57:09.000 I love how Johnny Depp's like, I hate this character.
00:57:11.000 I'm tired of it.
00:57:12.000 And they're like, oh, OK, well, we're not going to have you in the sixth one.
00:57:14.000 He's like, what?
00:57:15.000 That's my life.
00:57:16.000 Come on.
00:57:16.000 I don't want to go back to Benny and June.
00:57:19.000 Let's not be rash.
00:57:20.000 Come on.
00:57:21.000 I don't even answer Tim Burton's phone calls anymore.
00:57:24.000 We've made a mess together.
00:57:25.000 I mean, how many diagonal shots do you need?
00:57:27.000 He says, please.
00:57:29.000 Are they taking a break?
00:57:29.000 They're on a break?
00:57:30.000 Livestream?
00:57:31.000 What does shortly mean?
00:57:32.000 Do we know what shortly means?
00:57:34.000 They're not taking their lunch break, are they?
00:57:36.000 At 11.30?
00:57:36.000 It looks like they might be taking a short recess.
00:57:38.000 Taking a short recess.
00:57:39.000 So you know what?
00:57:40.000 Let's do this.
00:57:40.000 I don't know if we want to go to... Do you want to take some chats right now on YouTube?
00:57:44.000 This is usually something we do with Mug Club, but let's take chats for about five to ten minutes on the Johnny Depp situation, Amber Heard.
00:57:51.000 If that's what we want to do, you let me know.
00:57:52.000 Again, I'm kind of going through this blind.
00:57:56.000 And then if they come back, we can continue covering it.
00:57:59.000 If you're watching right now, you can usually join LightUpWithCreditor.com slash MugClub.
00:58:01.000 We take a few chats every day.
00:58:02.000 Thursday, we take a lot of chats.
00:58:04.000 And of course, we usually have another segment or another game, something like that.
00:58:08.000 But let's take some... We've got another segment, too, if we wanted to go into that.
00:58:11.000 No, I don't think we need to go into this.
00:58:12.000 I'd like to take some chats on what people think about the Amber Heard-Johnny Depp situation.
00:58:16.000 Because I have been very surprised.
00:58:19.000 I thought it would be maybe a 50-50 split.
00:58:21.000 It's not.
00:58:22.000 No, well I'm very surprised, even at first I was a little bit surprised by how many people didn't really believe her.
00:58:31.000 Right.
00:58:31.000 But I was not surprised by the number of people that immediately demonized Johnny Depp, took away his career, or at least wanted to.
00:58:38.000 Yeah.
00:58:39.000 Took away, you know, he just, you have a track record of being in the public spotlight since the early 80s and this is the first time it's come up.
00:58:47.000 I think you should at least give a little bit of time before you just jump on somebody.
00:58:54.000 That's our society.
00:58:55.000 The second you can hurt somebody and the second you can take their career away, there's a lot of people out there that just want to do that.
00:59:01.000 It's the inability to achieve something and just immediately try to kill off somebody else.
00:59:07.000 No, it was right away jumping on it, and honestly, not like... I remember we told some jokes about it, but nothing really serious because we didn't know.
00:59:13.000 Then when the tapes came out of Amber Heard, you know, hitting him and talking about hitting him, I remember feeling like this is just awful, him being railroaded.
00:59:22.000 Because again, working in the media, you see the groundswell on how much of a trend it was that Johnny Depp was abusive.
00:59:27.000 It wasn't really in our wheelhouse, so we didn't spend a lot of time on it, but I was aware of just... it was sort of this goldmine.
00:59:32.000 It was like a witch hunt of how many people could just, you know, get some kind of a scoop on Johnny Depp.
00:59:36.000 And I remember thinking, you're going to have a lot of people who heard that and they're not going to know that she was wailing on him.
00:59:42.000 Well, yeah.
00:59:43.000 And I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe Johnny Depp's own daughter came out and said, you know, he wasn't.
00:59:48.000 She was.
00:59:49.000 Right.
00:59:50.000 And that was ignored because it's like, well, come on, it's his daughter.
00:59:53.000 She's defending him.
00:59:54.000 But I think that's important.
00:59:56.000 Yeah, well, her own psychologist, the one who she hired, by the way, yesterday, who showed incredible gender bias by saying, you know, often the woman being abused just assumed that it was a woman, and it turns out she has never actually given an evaluation or testimony, at least in the last, I believe, five or ten years, that involved a man being abused outside of a same-sex couple.
01:00:16.000 Right.
01:00:17.000 And we know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that Mother?
01:00:21.000 commit domestic abuse against men more than men committed against women and that's what's reported
01:00:24.000 and we all know that it's underreported. Now this is why her own psychologist was arguing or a
01:00:29.000 clinical psychologist I believe was arguing the severity of the injuries are worse because men
01:00:34.000 are more powerful. No one's arguing that of course. I mean I've been hit by a woman, everyone here has
01:00:38.000 been hit by some woman at some point. We talked about that a long time. Mother. Yeah well you
01:00:43.000 know we had it coming. That's there's there's an immunity for mother. Grandmother. Yeah well
01:00:50.000 I don't know how that happened.
01:00:51.000 She came back from the grave just to womp on you.
01:00:55.000 That is powerfully bad behavior.
01:00:57.000 Every night.
01:00:57.000 But what we don't discuss is, okay, the severity of injuries are more severe if a man abuses a woman.
01:01:04.000 Got it.
01:01:05.000 Yes.
01:01:06.000 It doesn't change the fact that women try more.
01:01:08.000 And what about in this instance, it's irrelevant because you injured him by throwing a glass bottle at him.
01:01:14.000 In other words, the injury argument is no longer relevant here because if you use a weapon, that's why a gun is a great equalizer.
01:01:20.000 Sure, a man is stronger than a woman, which, by the way, is considered offensive and sexist outside of a legal case.
01:01:26.000 We're trying to say, well, sure, she hit him, but she can't hurt him.
01:01:28.000 She's just a poor little girl.
01:01:30.000 Johnny Depp is, you know, he's this brooding epitome of masculinity.
01:01:34.000 Well, yes, he's an all man.
01:01:36.000 Yes.
01:01:37.000 He was out doing Black Mass, which nobody bought him as the lead character.
01:01:40.000 Right.
01:01:42.000 Him and his turtle dove-like brittle chest, throwing overhand rights at Amber Heard.
01:01:48.000 And this is where we are.
01:01:49.000 These are the arguments.
01:01:51.000 Her own psychologist said, yes, she hit him.
01:01:54.000 But the question became, is it reactive violence?
01:01:56.000 And I think it was Johnny Depp's attorney saying, OK, so she throws a bottle.
01:01:59.000 Someone who's defending themselves, do they typically throw a bottle at someone's face?
01:02:03.000 She said, well, it could be reactive.
01:02:05.000 Okay.
01:02:05.000 He said, if they miss, do they typically throw a second one?
01:02:09.000 Well, it would depend on the context.
01:02:10.000 And then in any context where the allegation was that Johnny Depp got physical with her, it was abuse.
01:02:16.000 I don't really think that a bottle of mineral spirits is a great weapon for self-defense.
01:02:16.000 I don't know.
01:02:23.000 But I don't even really know what mineral spirits is.
01:02:25.000 It's apparently turpentine.
01:02:27.000 Right.
01:02:27.000 And with the amount that he smokes, not a good idea.
01:02:31.000 I mean, not a good idea to drink turpentine in general.
01:02:33.000 That's what I've always said.
01:02:34.000 Yeah.
01:02:34.000 I mean, it's safe.
01:02:35.000 It's a safe stance.
01:02:36.000 Yeah, I agree.
01:02:37.000 We don't need to be edgy all the time.
01:02:37.000 But you know what?
01:02:39.000 Let's grab some chats and see what people are saying here about Amber Heard and Johnny Depp.
01:02:42.000 Okay, John Johnston wants to know, do you think Johnny Depp gets more opportunities in Hollywood post-trial or less?
01:02:48.000 Absolutely more.
01:02:50.000 I absolutely think that he gets more.
01:02:52.000 I don't know how many more, but I absolutely think that he's in a better position after this trial than he was before this trial.
01:02:58.000 Because whether he wins the defamation or not, and I talked about this with half-Asian lawyer Bill Richmond on last Ash Wednesday, he needs to prove that she knowingly lied and that it did damages to him.
01:03:10.000 That's kind of a tough hurdle to clear.
01:03:14.000 Whether he wins that or not, he's already won.
01:03:16.000 Well, the people that are going to go see his movies, you know, they weren't going to go see him anyway.
01:03:21.000 The people that will always hold on.
01:03:23.000 That's the problem with now is if you get accused of something, you're going to be guilty to a certain number of people in the public.
01:03:31.000 Right.
01:03:32.000 Because they won't let it go and they will just assume that you're always the abuser because that allows them to always continue playing that victim card and have that narrative.
01:03:39.000 But I think he's going to have way more opportunities because they hated him anyway.
01:03:43.000 But people do like Johnny Depp.
01:03:45.000 It's why he's been successful for so long.
01:03:47.000 He's good at what he does.
01:03:48.000 And there's no reason why you wouldn't want to have a bankable star back.
01:03:52.000 And he was kind of aging out a little bit.
01:03:54.000 So this puts him back into the spotlight.
01:03:56.000 So I think he will actually get more opportunities as well.
01:03:59.000 Well, they said that he had to take a lot of crappy films because of some of the financial burdens that he had, and this was just because of a liquidity issue, so that's why he did a few.
01:04:07.000 What was that movie with the artificial intelligence thing where you download your brain?
01:04:12.000 Oh, Transcendence?
01:04:13.000 Transcendence, yeah.
01:04:14.000 Oh God, it was terrible.
01:04:16.000 But he had to do those, and so it was like Pirates of the Caribbean and crap.
01:04:19.000 But since then he hasn't really done anything, since the Amber Heard allegation.
01:04:22.000 No, he hasn't been able to.
01:04:24.000 He hasn't been able to, so I don't see how it could get any worse.
01:04:26.000 And certainly, I think at the worst, in the worst case scenario for Johnny Depp going forward now, it's, alright, this was an unhealthy, this was a toxic relationship from both sides, right?
01:04:36.000 That's at best that Amber Heard can argue.
01:04:38.000 And I think a lot of people are going to understand the difference.
01:04:40.000 It's pretty legitimate to a degree, sure.
01:04:42.000 Yeah.
01:04:42.000 I think it was toxic.
01:04:43.000 I think he was probably angry.
01:04:45.000 I think he was probably temperamental.
01:04:46.000 And I don't see any evidence that he physically abused her.
01:04:49.000 I don't either.
01:04:50.000 And I think that if anybody's being honest, we've all in our life been in an argument where you lose control, you're pissed off, your emotions get the better of you.
01:04:59.000 And people want to act like they've never been in a situation.
01:05:01.000 Now, yeah, obviously throwing bottles, hitting, you know, ripping off the part of somebody's finger.
01:05:07.000 You know, there's extents that we all don't cross, but we've all been in that moment where, whether it's with anybody, even where you just turn red and you do something regrettable.
01:05:18.000 Yeah.
01:05:18.000 Which I'm willing to, of course, look at her.
01:05:20.000 It's a very forgivable thing.
01:05:22.000 Right.
01:05:22.000 But it seems that this is sort of her usual.
01:05:26.000 Well, she agreed to terms.
01:05:27.000 Here's the problem.
01:05:28.000 There's a difference between, you know, explosive anger that happens.
01:05:31.000 Like you said, it happens probably in every relationship at some point where both the woman and the man, they get mad, they lose control, and that's a bad thing.
01:05:37.000 Shouldn't happen.
01:05:38.000 But it does happen.
01:05:39.000 It's realistic if you're in a relationship.
01:05:39.000 It's a part of life.
01:05:41.000 Right.
01:05:42.000 There's a difference between that and then proactively settling, which she did.
01:05:46.000 She got $7 million, Amber Heard.
01:05:49.000 And then after that and signing a non-disclosure to settle so that you keep it private for his children, right?
01:05:53.000 That was a big reason for it.
01:05:54.000 She got more money than she'd ever earned at that point, as far as I understood it.
01:05:58.000 Although her work in Never Back Down was...
01:06:00.000 I was going to say.
01:06:01.000 I can't believe she hasn't made more.
01:06:03.000 Yes.
01:06:04.000 From what I'm seeing, great.
01:06:06.000 She's a Daniel Day-Lewis.
01:06:07.000 Yes.
01:06:08.000 Actually, she's probably hamming it up about like Daniel Day-Lewis.
01:06:10.000 This is about as believable as Daniel Day-Lewis doing my left foot on the stand.
01:06:17.000 Playing human is really great.
01:06:18.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:06:20.000 She agreed.
01:06:21.000 Settled.
01:06:22.000 And then, when Aquaman was coming out, had someone ghostwrite and signed off on being a victim of abuse, capitalizing on the Me Too trend, and then told him, well, you go ahead and go out and say, this is what's a recorded phone call, you go out and tell them that you're a man, a victim of domestic abuse, you tell the world, Johnny, see who they believe.
01:06:39.000 That's not reactive anger.
01:06:42.000 That is proactive abuse.
01:06:44.000 That is proactive manipulation.
01:06:46.000 Regardless of the fights, if we can all agree that the fights are a tit-for-tat, And I don't know that that's the case.
01:06:51.000 Let's assume the fights are a tit-for-tat.
01:06:53.000 That phone call tells you that it's not, though.
01:06:54.000 That's the problem.
01:06:56.000 And I agree.
01:06:57.000 But let's say the fight's a tit-for-tat.
01:06:58.000 Yeah, yeah, no, I get it.
01:06:59.000 I get the hypothetical.
01:06:59.000 But I agree.
01:07:00.000 No, it's not even tit-for-tat.
01:07:00.000 But let's even say if it was she's mad and he's mad.
01:07:03.000 Well, since then, it's not.
01:07:07.000 He tried to settle.
01:07:08.000 He didn't go after her.
01:07:10.000 He didn't drag her name through the mud.
01:07:12.000 He wanted to keep it private.
01:07:14.000 He gave her money that she wouldn't be entitled to anyway.
01:07:18.000 And then she went forward and she decided to try and be destructive to get her name over the top.
01:07:22.000 Two very, very different approaches.
01:07:24.000 And it would be unrealistic to, and I'm not saying it's impossible, to believe that she was the angel she portrays herself to be in that marriage, he was a monster, and then after the marriage, him be the silent, non-confrontational one and her to be on the attack, on the attack, on the attack.
01:07:41.000 There's usually a pattern of behavior, and that was recognized by both psychologists.
01:07:46.000 What really just comes into question is, was Johnny Depp as abusive as Amber Heard?
01:07:50.000 Her own lawyers aren't saying that she wasn't.
01:07:53.000 They cannot claim she wasn't abusive.
01:07:55.000 They're just saying, well, maybe she was abused more.
01:07:56.000 Well, then it's a wash as far as I'm concerned.
01:07:59.000 Well, and whatever happened, he settled with the fact and knowing that he was the person who was going to be looked at like garbage for the rest of his life with that nondisclosure and that she was going to be able to do movies.
01:08:13.000 I mean, he was his career was ruined by it to a degree.
01:08:17.000 No doubt about it.
01:08:17.000 Well, I think they settled before she came out and did that.
01:08:20.000 Well, yeah.
01:08:21.000 Oh, yeah.
01:08:22.000 I think they said it was like, all right, look, we just both get divorced.
01:08:24.000 Here's the money and we just go on our merry way.
01:08:25.000 And she said, okay, took the money, said she would give it to charity.
01:08:28.000 And then she wrote the op-ed.
01:08:29.000 So she made the accusations.
01:08:30.000 Oh, I knew the charity thing, but I thought she had mentioned.
01:08:32.000 She might've mentioned it, but then she wrote the op-ed, which is what got him fired.
01:08:32.000 Okay.
01:08:36.000 That I knew.
01:08:37.000 After she took the money.
01:08:38.000 And it's like, well, you can't do, don't you took, you took the money so that you wouldn't keep going forward and try and use this to advance your career.
01:08:38.000 Okay.
01:08:44.000 And I think that's what rubs people the wrong way because they saw it play out in the public eye and the timing is just too convenient for her.
01:08:51.000 Well you wanted your cake and to eat it too and then to eat some more.
01:08:54.000 Yes and uh she's looking like she's eating a little bit more cake maybe it's just some stress eating.
01:08:59.000 Well it could be the the frumpy gown.
01:09:02.000 Yes well she wants everyone to know that she's just like you.
01:09:04.000 Yeah I also have no taste.
01:09:07.000 Yes she's just like you dressed like a nun.
01:09:09.000 Yeah except when she's getting into an elevator and sweats getting ready to get railed by Franco.
01:09:14.000 Yes.
01:09:17.000 By the way, that's more screen time than he's gotten in a while, too.
01:09:19.000 Yeah, you don't see a lot of them.
01:09:20.000 Well, that's what happens when you're on the set of Paulo Alto texting your parts to underagers.
01:09:27.000 I don't think he ever got in trouble for that.
01:09:28.000 Well, I don't know.
01:09:30.000 He's just a pretentious prick.
01:09:32.000 Remember he got his honorary degree from Columbia and he's like, yeah, I wrote 19 fiction- Have you tried reading any of his books?
01:09:38.000 No.
01:09:39.000 It's unbelievably bad.
01:09:40.000 Yeah, I would- It's like his- Everyone talks as though he's this genius who's hyperly focused and he's hyperly productive.
01:09:47.000 Read any of his crap.
01:09:48.000 You'll be like, oh yeah, this professor just wanted to be able to say, yeah, James Franco in a class.
01:09:51.000 Well, yeah, they also go, you know, he's like the next James Dean.
01:09:55.000 Play James Dean once.
01:09:57.000 Because it's like, yeah, because he looks like him in a red jacket.
01:10:00.000 Also, nothing against James Dean.
01:10:00.000 Yes, exactly.
01:10:02.000 We don't really know how that story would have turned out.
01:10:05.000 No, he only did three films.
01:10:06.000 Yeah, he lost his head pretty quickly, literally, during his Hollywood career.
01:10:13.000 He did three films, James Dean.
01:10:15.000 And one was very, very good.
01:10:17.000 Can you name the films?
01:10:18.000 One was East of Eden, right?
01:10:19.000 East of Eden.
01:10:20.000 East of Eden.
01:10:21.000 Obviously, Rebel Without a Cause.
01:10:23.000 And then what was the third?
01:10:25.000 It was a Western.
01:10:25.000 I should know.
01:10:27.000 Wasn't it a Western?
01:10:32.000 Giant.
01:10:33.000 It was western though, right?
01:10:35.000 It wasn't like a western, but it was set in the west, I think.
01:10:37.000 In the west, yeah.
01:10:38.000 Like on a ranch, I believe.
01:10:39.000 Oil?
01:10:39.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:10:40.000 Is that what it was?
01:10:41.000 Was it oil?
01:10:41.000 Okay, I remember it was like a west... I've honestly never seen... I've only seen East of Eden and, uh, obviously Road Without a Cause.
01:10:47.000 Yeah, Road Without a Cause.
01:10:48.000 I never saw Giant either.
01:10:49.000 East of Eden was okay.
01:10:51.000 He was good in it though.
01:10:52.000 He was good in it.
01:10:53.000 It's because he died, James Dean, so they want to say that he was the best.
01:10:57.000 I actually think he was better than Marlon Brando, but I don't know how it would have ended up.
01:11:00.000 Probably would have ended up fat and on the crapper.
01:11:03.000 Well, a lot like Marlon Brando.
01:11:04.000 Yes.
01:11:05.000 Who just hated... I love Marlon Brando, though.
01:11:08.000 I just like that he hated everything he did.
01:11:10.000 Yeah.
01:11:11.000 It's like, dude, why?
01:11:12.000 You just get to be an actor that's great at your job and you're angry at life.
01:11:16.000 And I love how they used to stage the scenes around him afterwards so he could just remain seated.
01:11:21.000 Like, people thought it's like, oh, it was for his character.
01:11:22.000 No, he's just like, you, come here.
01:11:25.000 You, come on.
01:11:28.000 You, what'd he say?
01:11:29.000 They're like, okay, can you just walk two steps?
01:11:31.000 It's not in my contract.
01:11:32.000 There was supposed to be, like, a huge fight scene at the end of Apocalypse Now.
01:11:36.000 Yeah.
01:11:36.000 And he showed up, like, drunk and didn't know his lines, so they just let him do his thing.
01:11:40.000 It ended up being pretty good.
01:11:40.000 Yeah.
01:11:41.000 That's like Steven Seagal.
01:11:41.000 Steven Seagal got so fat he couldn't do the fight scenes.
01:11:44.000 They're like, okay, he's gonna throw a front kick, and you're gonna, you know, you're gonna sidestep, you're gonna block, and he's like, I wouldn't do that.
01:11:49.000 They're like, what do you think?
01:11:50.000 I would just do this.
01:11:51.000 They're like, everyone else is, like, doing these acrobats, and he's just like, Well yeah, on Apocalypse Now, there was a scene where he's just like into the character and I don't know if it was because he was great at method or he's just lazy, but he's doing the lines as Colonel Kurtz and a bug just crawls in his mouth and he eats it and he just goes, I ate a bug.
01:12:10.000 And he just keeps talking.
01:12:14.000 He also had, uh, there was a Burger King right by his house.
01:12:17.000 He would pay a kid to take all the remaining food at the end of the night, and he would throw it over the fence of Marlon Brando's house, and then he would just like- Is that true?
01:12:26.000 It's true.
01:12:27.000 Grab all the- I can say this honestly.
01:12:29.000 Grab all the Burger King and go back inside his house.
01:12:30.000 Well, that's just self-punishment at that point.
01:12:32.000 I mean, he has the money.
01:12:33.000 Oh, he was, but yeah.
01:12:35.000 Did you see him in Island of Dr. Morell?
01:12:37.000 No, I did, but I didn't- Okay, look.
01:12:39.000 He wasn't even supposed to wear any of that.
01:12:42.000 I saw him.
01:12:43.000 I didn't make the leap that he had the Burger King boy throw bags of trash into his yard.
01:12:49.000 I assumed that he ate a lot of expensive, high-quality food because he was rich.
01:12:54.000 No.
01:12:55.000 God!
01:12:56.000 No, this was a sexy leading man who then played Vito Corleone and then after was like, I'll just ruin my body.
01:13:04.000 Or the Burger King in my yard.
01:13:05.000 I just can't imagine...
01:13:09.000 How disgusting is that?
01:13:10.000 I was looking up Dave's Sprinter King thing and I have something... Is this true?
01:13:15.000 Yeah, it is true, but... I don't think... No, no, hold on a second.
01:13:19.000 Can we just stop?
01:13:20.000 I don't think I've ever heard anything more disgusting.
01:13:23.000 Well, I might have something to top it.
01:13:26.000 Johnny Depp, Worlds Collide.
01:13:28.000 Oh, we're back to the trial, but really fast.
01:13:29.000 Johnny Depp said that he loved his farts so much he compared them to God.
01:13:33.000 Marlon Brando.
01:13:34.000 Depp said, my own tear-filled laughter gave up the charade.
01:13:37.000 I reached into my pocket and revealed the culprit.
01:13:38.000 Marlon's face lit up like a Christmas tree.
01:13:40.000 The smile of a five-year-old.
01:13:41.000 I handed the fart unit to him.
01:13:43.000 He held it up to the light and exclaimed, I found God.
01:13:45.000 I was so proud that after a couple of years of being on the receiving end of Marlon's practical jokes, I was finally able to swing back and connect big time.
01:13:51.000 Wait, it was a fart machine?
01:13:53.000 But we were both winners as the fart machine became the source of entertainment for many years.
01:13:57.000 Wow.
01:13:58.000 They have the sense of humor of like a six-year-old boy and they're both wearing Burger King Kids Club crowns.
01:14:05.000 Mr. Brando, I admire your catalog of work.
01:14:09.000 I celebrate all of it and I believe that we share common ground over mineral spirits in this flatulence machine.
01:14:19.000 Also circumcised in the 60s.
01:14:21.000 You can keep all the rings and I get the food.
01:14:24.000 Yes, I appreciate it.
01:14:27.000 I have always had a fondness for your Burger King trash thrown over your fence.
01:14:32.000 You take risks.
01:14:33.000 I eat it on all fours.
01:14:36.000 It's brave.
01:14:37.000 Brave choice.
01:14:38.000 This is why you make the choices.
01:14:39.000 They're not like Johnny Depp.
01:14:44.000 They are pretentious pricks.
01:14:45.000 I love both of them.
01:14:45.000 I know.
01:14:48.000 I can only imagine the director just like, oh, son of a bitch.
01:14:53.000 Wait, sorry, what were you saying, Chokadown?
01:14:54.000 So the trial's coming back, but right now, what, is she taking her oath?
01:14:59.000 She's taking her oath that she's going to immediately break?
01:15:06.000 Oh, there's no audio yet?
01:15:08.000 All right.
01:15:09.000 By the way, if anybody wants to throw McDonald's trash over my face when I'm older, I'll totally tape a 20 to the front.
01:15:19.000 So many similarities I would wager between me and Dave, though.
01:15:22.000 There are differences that bring us apart.
01:15:25.000 He prefers McDonald's.
01:15:26.000 I have a penchant for Whataburger thrown over my... It's not so much a fence as it is really more of a steel barrier, but it's a style choice, brave choices.
01:15:39.000 I originally wanted Wendy's, but the Frosties would just go everywhere and cause ants.
01:15:45.000 Yes, he had a problem with Frosties.
01:15:48.000 He used to yell at them and accuse them of being nothing more than a thick glorified milkshake.
01:15:55.000 And he pooped in the bed.
01:15:57.000 But he did so with no malice.
01:15:59.000 Imagine if Marlon Brando pooped in your bed.
01:16:01.000 Oh my gosh.
01:16:02.000 Just like sunk in.
01:16:03.000 You're like, was there a rhino in here?
01:16:03.000 Yeah.
01:16:05.000 It'd be like the reverse Princess and the Pea.
01:16:09.000 All right, let's see what's happening with Amber Hirtimp.
01:16:16.000 Thank you.
01:16:19.000 Try the fish.
01:16:20.000 Yes, I'll be here all week.
01:16:22.000 Did you reach out to- Try the friendship breaker.
01:16:24.000 Objection, your hearsay and bleeding.
01:16:29.000 Your Honor, I would direct your Honor's attention to the first one in blue.
01:16:32.000 Ooh, when she has that tablet lighting up in front of her, it's like someone telling a scary story by the campfire.
01:16:39.000 And they found hanging from the door a gold-digging bitch!
01:16:45.000 No!
01:16:49.000 I want you to dress like the judge.
01:16:51.000 Yes.
01:16:52.000 Let me get off.
01:16:53.000 Yes.
01:16:54.000 Without the shoulder pads.
01:16:57.000 Everything about this just seems calculated.
01:16:58.000 They keep cutting the audio with this thing.
01:17:00.000 Alright, well that's why we're here with you.
01:17:02.000 Yeah, we're trying for you.
01:17:03.000 We're giving you the old college try.
01:17:05.000 But it really is something.
01:17:06.000 Yeah, it really is something to try and keep this alive.
01:17:08.000 You guys can smash the like button if you want more of this.
01:17:12.000 Let's take a chat and see what people are saying about this trial.
01:17:18.000 He has a steel tumbler.
01:17:20.000 I don't know why I find that so funny.
01:17:23.000 It's like these actors, we think that they're distinguished and they have these yachts, but he's wearing, you know, the already pre-assembled suit from J.C.
01:17:30.000 Penney, drinking from a generic steel tumbler that he got at like some kind of a furniture convention.
01:17:34.000 Oh, that was my favorite was when Hulk Hogan was on.
01:17:39.000 I forgot what the trial was even about.
01:17:41.000 It was Gawker.
01:17:41.000 It was Gawker the sex tape, wasn't it?
01:17:43.000 Or no.
01:17:43.000 It might have been the sex tape, yeah.
01:17:45.000 It may have been that.
01:17:46.000 But he came in just in his usual, like, sort of wrestling yellow garb, you know?
01:17:51.000 And the judge is like, you have to tone it down so the next day he comes in in a black bandana and a giant chain.
01:17:51.000 Yeah.
01:17:58.000 He just went to NWO era.
01:17:59.000 Right.
01:18:00.000 Yeah, he just came in this bad Hulk Hogan.
01:18:05.000 And the judge is like, you know, fine, whatever.
01:18:08.000 At least you tried.
01:18:09.000 It didn't help him where every time they asked a question he went, Yeah.
01:18:13.000 What?
01:18:15.000 That is the funniest sex tape.
01:18:17.000 It's not even a sex tape.
01:18:18.000 It's just a guy talking about how he's full naked in a bed.
01:18:21.000 Oh Oh
01:18:25.000 Oh I just think I ate too much.
01:18:29.000 I ate too much.
01:18:31.000 I'm so sad.
01:18:32.000 I know.
01:18:33.000 Oh, Terry.
01:18:35.000 I mean, he made Mr. Nanny.
01:18:37.000 That makes that movie look... He also made, was it Thunder in Paradise?
01:18:42.000 Thunder in Paradise.
01:18:43.000 And then Suburban Commando with Christopher Lloyd.
01:18:46.000 I remember Suburban Commando.
01:18:46.000 That's right.
01:18:48.000 Oh, are they back?
01:18:49.000 Alright, let's hear what she has to lie.
01:18:51.000 Communication between you and Rocky Pennington, your best friend, is that correct?
01:18:55.000 That's correct.
01:18:56.000 Objection, hearsay.
01:19:01.000 It's an odd objection.
01:19:04.000 How is it hearsay if she was just asked if something was correct?
01:19:07.000 I don't know, that seems odd.
01:19:12.000 I'm not a lawyer, but I do play one on television, and that seems strange.
01:19:16.000 Amber Heard's like, really, I would like to sit down with you for a nice character study.
01:19:19.000 It's like, if you're playing a lawyer, it's going to be the same thing you always play.
01:19:22.000 Yes.
01:19:23.000 But you do.
01:19:25.000 She shows up in Aquaman with glasses and a law book.
01:19:29.000 I didn't even know she was in Aquaman, because I've never seen it.
01:19:32.000 Yeah.
01:19:33.000 My son had no interest.
01:19:34.000 I had no interest.
01:19:36.000 I mean, you really have to stretch to make the world in danger from sharks.
01:19:41.000 Yeah, I think we talked about it, but it was like an idea for Entourage, because they're like, well, here's a hero where they'll never make a movie about it, so we can just have it in this.
01:19:52.000 And then they did.
01:19:52.000 Yeah, I know.
01:19:53.000 And then they made Gatsby as well, which they somehow made worse than the movie Entourage did.
01:19:58.000 Oh, well, you didn't like Gatsby?
01:20:00.000 You didn't like it with the Jay-Z soundtrack?
01:20:02.000 Oh, you didn't make sense that people were dancing on a bridge and model teased or rap music while no one was driving the cars?
01:20:08.000 You know, I was wondering a little.
01:20:10.000 It seems...
01:20:11.000 The only film worse than Great Gatsby that I can think of.
01:20:14.000 Because the ending was awful.
01:20:15.000 And I love Leo in movies, but I couldn't wait for him to get shot.
01:20:22.000 Is it Puffy now?
01:20:25.000 Is it P. Diddy?
01:20:25.000 Is it Sean Combs?
01:20:26.000 What does he go by?
01:20:28.000 What does he go by?
01:20:29.000 Come on.
01:20:30.000 I get it that I'm the asshole for not knowing.
01:20:33.000 Didn't he show up in the film?
01:20:34.000 Wasn't he in the club scene or am I thinking of someone else?
01:20:36.000 Was it Jay- it was Jay-Z, or was it Puffy?
01:20:38.000 It was one of those really, really rich rappers.
01:20:40.000 I only remember Tobey Maguire for a second, and I honestly don't remember any other part of that movie.
01:20:45.000 Joel Edgerton.
01:20:46.000 Was it one of- was it- I know Outkast was the soundtrack, but I don't- I did a lot of the soundtrack, but I don't think it was one of them.
01:20:53.000 I don't know.
01:20:53.000 The only thing- and the ending was awful.
01:20:55.000 Spoiler alert if you didn't see The Great Gatsby.
01:20:58.000 The only ending worse- worse than that was King Kong, the one with Peter Jackson.
01:21:03.000 Oh, that's terrible.
01:21:03.000 The last line from Jack Black.
01:21:05.000 He goes, I guess in the end... Zoom out.
01:21:10.000 It was the beauty that killed the beast.
01:21:14.000 That's how you're gonna end it?
01:21:16.000 End Jack Black saying it.
01:21:17.000 They're back to the trail, but Puffy goes by Love now.
01:21:20.000 What?! !
01:21:22.000 No!
01:21:23.000 No!
01:21:23.000 No, I'm not going to do it!
01:21:25.000 He legally changed his name to Sean Love Combs.
01:21:27.000 Guess what?
01:21:28.000 I don't give a shit!
01:21:29.000 He was Puff Daddy, then he was P. Diddy, then he was Diddy, then he was Puffy.
01:21:34.000 I might be getting the chronicle.
01:21:35.000 Then he was Sean Combs around Monsters Ball because he wanted to be an actor.
01:21:38.000 That's right!
01:21:39.000 That's right!
01:21:40.000 Now he wants to be Love?
01:21:43.000 Love, that's feminine.
01:21:44.000 No.
01:21:44.000 I'm not gonna.
01:21:45.000 No.
01:21:45.000 I'm not gonna.
01:21:47.000 Puffy, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, Love.
01:21:53.000 How about Silly Prick?
01:21:57.000 It's gotten progressively worse.
01:22:01.000 I want to put him in a prison cell with The Edge from U2.
01:22:03.000 Like, yeah, you two fight it out over who gets the shittiest nickname that you gave yourself.
01:22:09.000 Yeah, we fight to the death and we kill the winner.
01:22:11.000 Yeah, exactly, like Spartacus.
01:22:15.000 Alright, let's see.
01:22:15.000 She's making her resting angel face.
01:22:28.000 Objection.
01:22:29.000 Hearsay.
01:22:29.000 Let's go to defendants 222.
01:22:30.000 Just spend the $7 million on a lawyer?
01:22:32.000 We know she didn't give it to the ACLU.
01:22:33.000 Let's go to defendants 222 and just spend the seven million on a lawyer.
01:22:43.000 We know she didn't give it to the ACLU.
01:22:45.000 No.
01:22:46.000 And they muted.
01:22:48.000 Why do they keep muting it?
01:22:49.000 It's like, well, this one's not because of an objection.
01:22:50.000 We just find her to be shrill.
01:22:52.000 Oh, Johnny Depp's other lawyer needs to wash her hair.
01:22:56.000 I know.
01:22:58.000 Not a good look.
01:22:59.000 Right now he's just talking to her like, have you ever considered dry shampoo?
01:23:02.000 Yes.
01:23:03.000 You're sitting next to a movie star.
01:23:05.000 Maybe you should sit on the other side of the table, not next to me.
01:23:08.000 Yes.
01:23:08.000 And if I'm saying that, that must be quite severe because it's well known that I don't bathe, but I at least present myself as I do.
01:23:15.000 Yes.
01:23:16.000 I've smoked 38 cigarettes outside and you smell way worse than I do.
01:23:20.000 I don't know how that happens.
01:23:21.000 Didn't you go to Cornell?
01:23:22.000 Yes.
01:23:23.000 Is that my jacket?
01:23:24.000 laughter Oh, and that other guy's sitting there with- it's like, don't
01:23:32.000 sit with your palm that way you look gay!
01:23:34.000 I know, he's just leaning in like this.
01:23:36.000 What are we gonna say next?
01:23:37.000 So, Johnny, what happened in Donnie Brasco?
01:23:40.000 I was a little confused.
01:23:41.000 Oh, oh, we're back.
01:23:42.000 Oh, I think I threw that.
01:23:43.000 Objection!
01:23:45.000 Donnie Brasco is a great film. Yeah That's honestly my favorite Johnny Depp film.
01:23:55.000 I love Donnie Brasco.
01:23:56.000 I like it more than Godfather.
01:23:57.000 I know it's a different kind of film, but Donnie Brasco is one of my favorite movies in that genre and I feel like it's overlooked.
01:24:02.000 Oh, I agree.
01:24:03.000 And I'll give you two reasons.
01:24:05.000 Michael and Madsen.
01:24:09.000 That is an underutilized fantastic actor in my book.
01:24:12.000 I love him in movies.
01:24:15.000 Let's go back, yeah, let's go back.
01:24:16.000 They throw them in stuff, like, I've seen them in B-movies every now and then on, like, a plane.
01:24:20.000 But every part he's in is great.
01:24:23.000 Yeah, I know.
01:24:23.000 I watch movies on planes.
01:24:24.000 It's like Eric Roberts!
01:24:25.000 I can't believe there are a lot on planes.
01:24:27.000 I'm like, this is some hardcore nudity just available to watch on a plane.
01:24:31.000 Yeah, The Watchman was on a plane once.
01:24:33.000 Yeah, it's just... Oh, the blue genitals.
01:24:37.000 Are they muting again?
01:24:38.000 This makes it impossible!
01:24:41.000 It's almost a stop-start as a former Vice President Biden's State of the Union address.
01:24:45.000 Yeah, this is how his brain works?
01:24:46.000 Yes.
01:24:48.000 And look, even right now, look at her face.
01:24:49.000 Look at her face.
01:24:50.000 It's just like, I'm sorry.
01:24:53.000 I didn't mean to doody in your bed.
01:24:57.000 I didn't.
01:24:58.000 It was just a prank.
01:24:59.000 Here's the difference.
01:25:00.000 If he goes, uh, they say, did you do drugs?
01:25:03.000 Yes, I did.
01:25:04.000 They say, did you drink?
01:25:04.000 Yes.
01:25:05.000 Did you break cabinets?
01:25:06.000 Yes, I did break, uh, I've been in a fight with a cabinet or two in my day.
01:25:09.000 You know, he's sitting there and he's kind of being, okay, maybe you can say that he's being a little bit arrogant, but he admitted to it.
01:25:14.000 Whereas she goes, the pooping was a prank.
01:25:18.000 Well, it was an accident.
01:25:20.000 Okay, I'm sorry I didn't punch you the right way.
01:25:24.000 When you see a pattern of someone never accepting responsibility, that's what makes it tough.
01:25:28.000 It's really tough to be in a relationship or friendship if you have a mother, a father, a son who can never be wrong.
01:25:35.000 We've all had that person.
01:25:37.000 And I don't mean someone who's hard-headed.
01:25:38.000 I mean someone who can never be wrong and never be responsible for their own mistakes.
01:25:42.000 And that's ultimately what I think.
01:25:44.000 If you had to pin it down to one thing, it's that Johnny Depp put himself at risk.
01:25:49.000 Yes.
01:25:50.000 all of his flaws for the world to see and accept responsibility for them and he's just said,
01:25:54.000 I just didn't do this part, which is what she's saying, the abuse. That didn't happen. Did I do
01:25:59.000 drugs? Yes. Was I in and out of rehabilitation and sobriety?
01:26:02.000 Yes. Did I get mad? Yes. Was I depressed sometimes? Yes. All of these things are true. I
01:26:08.000 just didn't physically abuse her.
01:26:11.000 And she's saying none of these things that I did, which are recorded and on the record, are my fault.
01:26:16.000 Let's go back to her and see.
01:26:17.000 That's a good point.
01:26:18.000 What, if anything, did you do?
01:26:20.000 No, you're right, though.
01:26:21.000 I mean, that is a very good point.
01:26:26.000 I reached out to friends and family.
01:26:31.000 Hearsay.
01:26:32.000 Asked for support.
01:26:33.000 Objection.
01:26:34.000 Hearsay.
01:26:36.000 Objection, your honor!
01:26:37.000 That woman's a bitch!
01:26:38.000 Sustained.
01:26:40.000 Agreed.
01:26:40.000 Agreed.
01:26:42.000 The legal nomenclature you need not concern yourself with.
01:26:48.000 That's why we had gone back to LA.
01:26:51.000 Johnny was sick.
01:26:55.000 After having passed out on the plane.
01:26:56.000 So I took her to dinner.
01:27:00.000 We went to Benihana's.
01:27:02.000 What?
01:27:04.000 Could there be a more high-profile play for the celebrities?
01:27:06.000 I want to go somewhere quiet where I can relax.
01:27:09.000 Where they come to my table and light a fire.
01:27:11.000 Yes.
01:27:12.000 I want to share a table with eight strangers that want to take a photo with me.
01:27:16.000 With eight strange Asian men with rage problems.
01:27:19.000 I like when they use the gasoline pee.
01:27:22.000 It's funny.
01:27:23.000 And they make the choo-choo onions.
01:27:25.000 It's almost as funny as the fart machine.
01:27:26.000 Shared with Brando.
01:27:28.000 Wait, I laugh.
01:27:29.000 He just laughs way too hard at it for way too long.
01:27:33.000 All right, let's see.
01:27:33.000 By the way, you notice she's saying when they're asking, she's always talking about him.
01:27:37.000 This is something you see.
01:27:38.000 She's obsessed with him.
01:27:40.000 A lot of his questioning was about himself.
01:27:42.000 Hers, Johnny was sick.
01:27:44.000 Johnny wanted to do this.
01:27:45.000 And I just, and then Johnny was this way.
01:27:47.000 And I just, and she's always diagnosing him.
01:27:49.000 That's interesting.
01:27:52.000 That's a lot of projections.
01:27:54.000 It's just deflection.
01:27:56.000 Yeah.
01:27:58.000 It's still here, stay your honor.
01:27:59.000 I'm not crying, I'm just gross.
01:28:02.000 May we approach?
01:28:04.000 Is she crying?
01:28:04.000 Is she crying?
01:28:05.000 Do we have to drink?
01:28:06.000 Is that crying or is that just sniffles?
01:28:08.000 There's a lot of pollen.
01:28:09.000 What's the pollen index?
01:28:11.000 What's the pollen index?
01:28:12.000 I don't want to have to keep drinking if there's a bad pollen index.
01:28:14.000 It's very high.
01:28:15.000 Okay, so then this will stay put.
01:28:17.000 It's not fair to get me soused when there's a pollen.
01:28:24.000 He was like, may we approach the bench, comes up, spits on him.
01:28:28.000 Do this right!
01:28:29.000 Is he laughing?
01:28:30.000 Oh he's laughing!
01:28:32.000 Shit!
01:28:34.000 That's not pollen induced!
01:28:35.000 No.
01:28:38.000 Was he laughing?
01:28:39.000 It looked to me.
01:28:40.000 I have a fart ski chain Marlon Brando gave me.
01:28:45.000 Instead of a stress ball, he just has a whoopie cushion?
01:28:47.000 I was like, I'm sorry.
01:28:50.000 I can't help it.
01:28:51.000 It reminds me of home.
01:28:52.000 Yes, it tickles me pink.
01:28:54.000 Pfft.
01:28:56.000 Ha ha ha.
01:28:58.000 All right, since no one has an answer if he was actually laughing, I'll just take one sip.
01:29:00.000 He was actually laughing.
01:29:02.000 I'm not finishing.
01:29:02.000 Those unattractive lawyers.
01:29:07.000 Oh, he had some pretty foxy letters before too.
01:29:10.000 The guy on the left looks like he's the before picture before someone gets teeth.
01:29:13.000 He looks like the guy that's finally off of alcohol after God knows how many years and he can fix the whiskey face.
01:29:23.000 Yes.
01:29:25.000 Now to 228.
01:29:27.000 All right.
01:29:27.000 Your Honor, we're going to object on hearsay.
01:29:40.000 Son of a bitch!
01:29:42.000 Wow.
01:29:43.000 It's sustained every time.
01:29:44.000 The sigh.
01:29:45.000 I understand your honor's ruling, but I think...
01:29:47.000 The sigh.
01:29:51.000 Oh!
01:29:54.000 And I wore my best funeral frock!
01:29:56.000 Oh!
01:30:00.000 Oh, and I just stole this from a hands-made tale.
01:30:04.000 Yes.
01:30:05.000 Or whatever that's called.
01:30:06.000 I don't know.
01:30:07.000 I don't know if it's Handmaid or Handmaidens.
01:30:10.000 Handmaidens?
01:30:10.000 I've watched one episode and I was like, I can't do this.
01:30:13.000 No, I just saw the costumes and I was like, no, thank you.
01:30:15.000 That's enough.
01:30:17.000 Yeah.
01:30:18.000 They're muting it again?
01:30:20.000 People will hate it, but it's like Game of Thrones for me.
01:30:22.000 I've never seen it, and I never will.
01:30:25.000 And I know people are gonna get pissed, but it's like, I don't care about knights and dragons.
01:30:32.000 I don't care.
01:30:33.000 Knights and drag queens.
01:30:36.000 On Game of Thrones?
01:30:37.000 I don't know.
01:30:37.000 There's a lot of penis.
01:30:39.000 There's a lot of gay fornication.
01:30:42.000 I could just watch The Sopranos again.
01:30:44.000 There's about three good episodes in the entire, what is it, eight, nine seasons of Game of Thrones?
01:30:48.000 And people act like it's the greatest show they've ever had.
01:30:50.000 Yeah, and everything else is just a tease to get to a couple of good episodes, and the rest of it is so boring.
01:30:56.000 I could look at the commercial for the original one, and I'm like, I'll never watch this show.
01:31:01.000 You know what else, though, too?
01:31:02.000 I think you and I probably share this.
01:31:04.000 Being a comedian, like, you see an interview with George R. R. Martin, you're like, oh, that guy has no sense of humor.
01:31:08.000 I probably can't read this.
01:31:09.000 Right.
01:31:10.000 Yeah.
01:31:10.000 He takes himself so seriously.
01:31:12.000 Like, if you go back and you read Tolkien, like, you see, like, he actually talked about how this was designed to be written, it was basically meant to be sort of, you know, folklore, or he said, like, what's the term, like, mythology for the Western Europe that didn't already exist.
01:31:26.000 And he said it was meant for the simple person, for the layman, and he seemed to have a sense of humor about himself.
01:31:30.000 But George R. R. Martin, he has no sense of humor, and once someone shows it, I'm like, I can't do it.
01:31:34.000 Oh no, one of the funniest things I've ever seen too about the guy.
01:31:37.000 I was on an episode of Family Guy and it's just George R. R. Martin, he's just in his, like, mobility scooter.
01:31:43.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:31:44.000 And Brian Wilkspie goes, are you sitting?
01:31:46.000 And he goes, almost always.
01:31:48.000 Hey, our resident psychology PhD candidate has some commentary if you want to bring him in.
01:31:54.000 All right, okay.
01:31:55.000 We want to bring in our resident PhD candidate.
01:31:57.000 All right, let's bring him on in.
01:31:58.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:31:59.000 Kevin, you're such a disease.
01:32:01.000 Jack the Bear.
01:32:01.000 Oh, they're coming back.
01:32:02.000 Oh, okay, hold on, they're coming back.
01:32:04.000 So tell us if there's an objection, I swear to God.
01:32:12.000 What you did then over that night, the next day.
01:32:15.000 I'm going to leaf blow pollen all over this room.
01:32:17.000 Is that cousin Vinnie talking?
01:32:18.000 At the hotel.
01:32:24.000 What did you do?
01:32:25.000 I cried a lot.
01:32:28.000 I tried to surround myself with my friends.
01:32:31.000 And resolve to leave him.
01:32:35.000 Let the record show they're all imaginary.
01:32:36.000 I felt powerless.
01:32:41.000 Our friends are different kinds of liquor.
01:32:42.000 Nothing I did made a difference.
01:32:45.000 Friend mineral, next friend spirits.
01:32:47.000 I was so careful.
01:32:48.000 Rejection.
01:32:48.000 Non-responsive.
01:32:52.000 So she's doing some of the things I was talking about out there.
01:32:55.000 The start-stop is very indicative of somebody that's lying and kind of fabricating on the spot.
01:33:00.000 So she'll have moments where she talks quite a bit and it's just like you telling a story about your life that you're watching the video of in your mind.
01:33:08.000 Got my penis caught in revolving door once.
01:33:10.000 Exactly.
01:33:10.000 And it would be a fluid story from start to stop.
01:33:13.000 A lot of people behind it, too.
01:33:15.000 Yeah, I know.
01:33:16.000 I don't know how to be a gentleman in that.
01:33:17.000 Do I go first to move the door for the woman, or do I let her go first and let the door?
01:33:21.000 But the problem is, there's no way to be a gentleman when your wiener's stuck between the glass.
01:33:25.000 It's just screaming.
01:33:27.000 No, that's a good point, and I've also noticed there are very few ums, which a lot of people will say, you know, in broadcasting, you're not supposed to say um because it's a word whisker, but it's natural when you're recounting something, as opposed to very staccato, articulate, stop, and then this described that way.
01:33:43.000 I notice that's how she's doing it.
01:33:44.000 All right, let's see what she's saying.
01:33:46.000 Half of Mr. Depp.
01:33:47.000 Objection, hearsay.
01:33:52.000 Did you just call it like a slip and fall lawyer?
01:33:56.000 It's unreal.
01:33:57.000 Well, I think, who's objecting?
01:34:00.000 Is Johnny Depp's lawyers right now objecting?
01:34:01.000 Yeah.
01:34:02.000 Cause her lawyer is... Yeah.
01:34:04.000 So they're just making it impossible.
01:34:05.000 So it's good for them to do that, but it's exhausting for us.
01:34:08.000 Everything her lawyer's doing is like, it's not helping her.
01:34:12.000 Right.
01:34:13.000 How did you feel that night?
01:34:18.000 Emperor, what size are your tits?
01:34:20.000 Objection!
01:34:21.000 Mmm, overruled.
01:34:23.000 How would you describe your nipples?
01:34:24.000 Silver dollar?
01:34:25.000 Do they take up most of the breast national geographic?
01:34:28.000 Would they be comparable to an ice cream cone?
01:34:30.000 And if so, which flavor?
01:34:31.000 Yes.
01:34:32.000 No?
01:34:32.000 I'll allow it.
01:34:33.000 I demand it.
01:34:35.000 Hearsay.
01:34:36.000 I'm afraid that's overruled.
01:34:39.000 Why?
01:34:39.000 Because I'm incredibly horny.
01:34:42.000 Now pull those out, or I will have you in contempt.
01:34:48.000 And they'll make you pull it out in court jail!
01:34:53.000 Oh, we gotta see this.
01:34:54.000 I'm sorry.
01:34:54.000 I don't... They just, they went back to the muse.
01:34:56.000 Son of a!
01:34:57.000 This is the worst!
01:34:58.000 Alright, give us your PhD candidate.
01:35:00.000 Give us your breakdown here.
01:35:02.000 Well, one of the things that you see a lot from her is the believe me phase.
01:35:05.000 Right.
01:35:06.000 And there was a lot of that in the early parts of her testimony, especially yesterday, where she's telling a story and she's wanting to look at the jury and she'll kind of go into her narrative and then up come the eyebrows.
01:35:17.000 Don't look me in the eyes, it triggers my aggression.
01:35:20.000 It's true.
01:35:22.000 I see it as a challenge.
01:35:29.000 I'm half drunk and it's 11 central, for God's sakes.
01:35:33.000 I'm sorry, Kevin, go ahead.
01:35:34.000 Your analysis is far more valuable than anything I can contribute here.
01:35:37.000 Johnny's all drunk.
01:35:39.000 It's like, you believe me, right?
01:35:41.000 And she looks to the jury, and the eyebrows come up, and then she'll go back into the start-stop thing, and then she's checking in.
01:35:48.000 Because, you know, you guys believe me.
01:35:50.000 Yeah.
01:35:52.000 Which, it seems like it's, if you're reliving one of your most, and this is something that people get wrong because a lot of the body language experts you'll see on television, they're like, that person is looking down and to the left it means they're lying.
01:36:01.000 Often if someone is actually recounting something traumatic or something that is embarrassing to them, they won't look you in the eye.
01:36:06.000 It doesn't mean that they're lying, it means that they're nervous about it.
01:36:09.000 So someone who looks you in the eye to describe their most traumatic experience of their life...
01:36:14.000 That's not natural.
01:36:15.000 Because they've been told, look them in the eye.
01:36:18.000 Daniel-san, always look her eye.
01:36:20.000 Well no, not if you were raped.
01:36:22.000 Right.
01:36:23.000 Longer than three seconds, it's getting weird.
01:36:25.000 Yes it is.
01:36:25.000 You ever see guys interact?
01:36:28.000 They don't look each other in the eye.
01:36:29.000 No.
01:36:29.000 Unless it's a stare down before a fight.
01:36:31.000 And then they'll talk about something they did that was terrible and they'll be like... So do you want to have an appetizer?
01:36:39.000 Yes, I hear they have fantastic mineral spirit spinach dip.
01:36:45.000 Yep.
01:36:45.000 You think they'll find the body?
01:36:48.000 Well, it's buried under bags of Burger King refuse.
01:36:53.000 Bags of old Burger King Kids Club friendship bracelets.
01:36:56.000 Yes.
01:36:57.000 And rings, Dakota rings.
01:37:01.000 Bags of Burger King scraps!
01:37:04.000 It's a vest.
01:37:04.000 It's a vest.
01:37:06.000 Ugh, I felt guilty once because when I was poor and I was at a hotel on the road, I took a roll because it clearly had been like, it was like one of those places that would wrap it in foil.
01:37:14.000 Please bend there.
01:37:15.000 Yeah.
01:37:17.000 Okay, I took more than a roll.
01:37:18.000 I was trying to, look, I took food off of a take, I took food off of room service trays when I was poor.
01:37:26.000 Well every comic too on earth has been like, this continental breakfast also goes in my pocket for dinners.
01:37:34.000 Looks like I'm having yogurt and a banana at 5 o'clock.
01:37:38.000 Life's going good.
01:37:39.000 And then the other comic walks up and knows exactly what you're doing and just goes...
01:37:43.000 Yeah.
01:37:44.000 You've ruined my... You've ruined dinner.
01:37:50.000 What is this, a Danish?
01:37:51.000 Oh, it goes in your back pocket.
01:37:53.000 I had to go siphon gas.
01:37:55.000 They're back up on Amber.
01:37:56.000 Okay, let's hear Amber lie.
01:37:58.000 I used to dap in the days following the Boston plane incident.
01:38:03.000 Yes, I did.
01:38:04.000 They were two Utes.
01:38:05.000 Please tell the jury about those communications.
01:38:09.000 I heard from him...
01:38:13.000 Directly, I also heard from him through his assistants who were texting for him.
01:38:17.000 Objection, Your Honor.
01:38:18.000 Hearsay.
01:38:18.000 I knew it was going to be hearsay.
01:38:19.000 Sustained.
01:38:20.000 You are not allowed to testify about the text messages with his assistant, but can you tell the jury about your communications with Mr. Depp?
01:38:29.000 Okay.
01:38:31.000 It's kind of confusing because he was texting through them.
01:38:34.000 Objection, Your Honor.
01:38:36.000 Sustained objection.
01:38:36.000 I'll extract that from the record and disregard that testimony.
01:38:39.000 Oh boy!
01:38:40.000 She's not going to do well with this.
01:38:44.000 I have to pee in a minute.
01:38:46.000 Oh, so am I. We just can't all go pee at once.
01:38:48.000 Tokenawan's gone.
01:38:49.000 Oh.
01:38:49.000 I've got to pee super bad.
01:38:51.000 Yeah.
01:38:51.000 Just wait for him.
01:38:52.000 Then you... Is Kevi still in there?
01:38:53.000 Can I go before you?
01:38:55.000 Or do you have to go first?
01:38:56.000 All right.
01:38:56.000 You can go.
01:38:57.000 And then I'll go.
01:38:57.000 They're breaking her pattern.
01:38:59.000 So she's not able to get on a roll.
01:39:01.000 Yeah.
01:39:01.000 No, that's exactly... Okay.
01:39:03.000 You two talk.
01:39:04.000 I want to hear what she... And then I'll come back.
01:39:05.000 You guys update me on all the lies.
01:39:07.000 Okay?
01:39:07.000 Roger.
01:39:08.000 About my prediction, everything that broad says is bullshit.
01:39:10.000 Okay.
01:39:10.000 We'll be right back.
01:39:14.000 We still got out of the other room.
01:39:15.000 I didn't respond right away.
01:39:17.000 And he texted me again that he understood that I had made my decision to move on and good luck.
01:39:27.000 Wouldn't a transcript help this out?
01:39:29.000 And then continued to...
01:39:34.000 Contact me.
01:39:36.000 I spoke to him when I was in New York on the phone and he said that he was, um, he had a chip or that he was going to meetings.
01:39:50.000 I think at the time mentioned, uh, sober, uh, another celebrity that was kind of advising him on sobriety or not advising him, but you know, Encouraging him and he was saying, well look, you know, me and this person we're... She doesn't know what a sponsor is?
01:40:09.000 We even went to a meeting.
01:40:11.000 I've got three days sober, four days sober, and that was the last time.
01:40:17.000 The monster will never come back.
01:40:18.000 The monster will never come back.
01:40:19.000 So she's telling the story to the jury?
01:40:20.000 Because it felt like such a different... That is kind of weird.
01:40:24.000 It felt so much worse than it had ever been before.
01:40:28.000 It is strange.
01:40:29.000 It's like, Kevin, would you say she's performing for the jury?
01:40:33.000 Definitely.
01:40:34.000 Well, and the point about ums and the thought linkers that I'm doing right now myself, I think is well made, but we are talking about an actress here who has a lot of time in front of camera, has spent their whole time doing interviews.
01:40:48.000 So we might actually be seeing who she is now without the thought linkers, like that she just might be that good.
01:40:56.000 Right.
01:40:56.000 Which makes the start-stop thing so, like, pronounced.
01:40:58.000 Sure.
01:40:59.000 I've seen Never Back Down.
01:41:01.000 You've seen what?
01:41:02.000 I said I've seen Never Back Down.
01:41:03.000 She's not that good.
01:41:04.000 No, yeah, that's a good point.
01:41:05.000 Express your emotions and how you felt about all this.
01:41:09.000 Objection, hearsay.
01:41:12.000 Well, let's go also lay the foundation, Your Honor.
01:41:15.000 Let's go to Defendant 239.
01:41:16.000 That's a drink again?
01:41:17.000 Yeah.
01:41:17.000 239.
01:41:17.000 That came in unarmed.
01:41:21.000 Good gravy.
01:41:23.000 Like, shouldn't she be answering the lawyer and not staring off to the side of the road?
01:41:31.000 I mean, Tim makes a good point.
01:41:34.000 Someone asks you a question, you look at them.
01:41:36.000 Yeah, you start looking at them and then she just looks off and answers the question.
01:41:39.000 The same as we just looked at each other for that point of conversation.
01:41:43.000 As opposed to me staring at everyone else to see what they thought.
01:41:48.000 It's insane.
01:41:49.000 It's like, so Dave, I agree with what you say.
01:41:53.000 Yeah, I'm just gonna look everywhere else.
01:41:55.000 Is the jury, are you believing my bullshit?
01:41:57.000 Alright, great.
01:41:58.000 Well, that's what I assumed.
01:41:59.000 Gage Groskrutz would do that a lot during the trial.
01:42:02.000 Who would?
01:42:02.000 Gage Groskrutz, when he was... Also a domestic abuser.
01:42:07.000 Oh, that idiot from... And then look over and be like, you guys believe me, right?
01:42:12.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:42:13.000 And then turn back.
01:42:15.000 It is very weird.
01:42:16.000 The guy who drove farther than Kyle with a gun.
01:42:18.000 Yes, exactly.
01:42:20.000 If they don't get a pattern here, we'll go to Mug Club and take chat because this is just... it's just death watching.
01:42:24.000 Oh, there's a pattern.
01:42:25.000 It just sounds like a... They can never answer, which means that his attorneys are doing a good job.
01:42:31.000 This is why when you watch shows like Boston Legal or The Practice, you realize that it's not like that in real life.
01:42:36.000 It's very tedious.
01:42:37.000 Well, as Kevin and Tim have both pointed out, she's kind of performing to the jury.
01:42:41.000 Her face always goes to them.
01:42:43.000 She's kind of asking it out.
01:42:44.000 She's not really answering the questions.
01:42:45.000 It's more of a performance every time.
01:42:47.000 And that's why I think she's constantly getting hearsay, hearsay.
01:42:50.000 Also, she slept with half of them.
01:42:52.000 Well, of course.
01:42:53.000 It's just James Franco.
01:42:54.000 That looks like a cry.
01:42:55.000 Listen, I'm going to give you fair judgment.
01:42:58.000 Is that a cry?
01:42:59.000 I'm willing to serve my community.
01:43:01.000 Sit on the jury.
01:43:02.000 All right, let's see.
01:43:04.000 Oh, God.
01:43:04.000 Embarrassed and sorry.
01:43:06.000 He said he was and I believed him.
01:43:07.000 And this is a 4% beer.
01:43:09.000 It's basically water.
01:43:15.000 Come back with him.
01:43:16.000 All right, I'm gonna go because I don't care.
01:43:21.000 On the condition that he will- Come back, we'll take a chance.
01:43:24.000 Uphold his promise.
01:43:29.000 to do the treatment, to do the full detox, clean up and never go back.
01:43:33.000 Again, she's talking about Johnny.
01:43:42.000 What Johnny needed to go to rehab.
01:43:44.000 Johnny didn't do the detox.
01:43:45.000 Johnny didn't do this.
01:43:47.000 What about you, Amber?
01:43:49.000 What about you?
01:43:51.000 That's what I think people are picking up on.
01:43:54.000 I don't know.
01:43:55.000 You guys can comment below and I would love to see your comments because a lot, it is interesting to see this dynamic of specifically women, specifically women who've been abused, but across the board, not buy it.
01:44:09.000 And I think the big reason that people are turned off is Johnny Depp did answer questions about himself, about his inner demons, about his flaws, and she is focused on questions about him.
01:44:20.000 About his flaws.
01:44:23.000 And for the same reason that people don't like a tattletale.
01:44:25.000 It's like, okay, but what about you?
01:44:27.000 And she hasn't gotten to that.
01:44:29.000 She doesn't want to talk about that.
01:44:31.000 This doctor was going to be the solution, the cure, you know, uh, and he got, he got brought on board and all of a sudden the plan was that this team would be involved in Johnny's recovery.
01:44:45.000 So it felt real, it felt serious.
01:44:47.000 I felt like, Protected you know I'd already by this point heard a million times it seems like a promises to get clean and sober but this felt like a change and They were gonna come to Boston and start working with Johnny and plan was to keep Johnny On a on the same level
01:45:10.000 Drugs that he was on since he was filming they needed him to finish filming
01:45:14.000 So he was going to be maintained with his prescript with prescription pills including the painkillers
01:45:23.000 and The the plan was he would obviously abstain from alcohol
01:45:30.000 completely and all other drugs like weed and coke and Then when he finished for someone here's also something for
01:45:37.000 someone who's so concerned About and I would say obsessed with Johnny Depp's substance
01:45:43.000 abuse issues It really is weird that she was going- because they were only married for, was it a year?
01:45:48.000 A little more than a year?
01:45:50.000 It wasn't a very long amount of time.
01:45:51.000 Maybe it was 15 months.
01:45:52.000 At most it was 15 months.
01:45:53.000 You know, yesterday she talked about three separate instances when she was doing drugs with Johnny Depp.
01:46:00.000 MDMA when they went to this trailer park.
01:46:02.000 MDMA on the plane.
01:46:03.000 So for someone who's like, I just really want him to get off drugs and get sober.
01:46:06.000 But you were doing drugs with him.
01:46:08.000 So when did you start taking it seriously?
01:46:11.000 Right.
01:46:12.000 Yeah.
01:46:13.000 15 months.
01:46:14.000 15 months.
01:46:14.000 You're right.
01:46:16.000 And if that's the case, does she take responsibility for enabling him?
01:46:22.000 where Johnny was, I just would come for short periods of time in between, I mean on weekends
01:46:29.000 from filming until I wrapped my movie, which I did. I think in May.
01:46:34.000 Whoever wrote this drinking game needs to be on temporary leave.
01:46:37.000 Well they nailed it.
01:46:40.000 It's a good game.
01:46:41.000 Yeah, but they're gonna kill me.
01:46:43.000 At least every time she does Believe Me Face isn't in the drinking game, there would just be alcohol.
01:46:49.000 Yes, exactly.
01:46:50.000 Just I'll be in the hospital.
01:46:52.000 Medications which they shared with me, told me about.
01:46:55.000 Objection, your honor. Hearsay.
01:46:57.000 But we have to be careful about what other people told you.
01:47:03.000 Okay, so you can testify to what you know.
01:47:05.000 Yes, please refrain from... See, we're in a courtroom, so being a gossipy high school bitch doesn't quite apply here.
01:47:12.000 This doesn't meet the minimum threshold for the court.
01:47:16.000 I know the amount that Johnny told them he was on was so that they could maintain him for the filming.
01:47:27.000 That wasn't a specific reference.
01:47:29.000 No, and it wasn't her film, it was his film.
01:47:31.000 We just have a movie mentioned.
01:47:32.000 Did it change when you gave him MDMA twice?
01:47:34.000 He... his behavior, his whole personality changed drastically.
01:47:41.000 He would...
01:47:44.000 Did it change when you gave him MDMA twice?
01:47:46.000 I was staying in Boston with him having wrapped my movie and he
01:47:50.000 would in mid-sentence...
01:47:52.000 He just said my movie.
01:47:53.000 One time I was sitting across from him and...
01:47:59.000 I'm not gonna give that a full high five.
01:48:00.000 The good thing is I can finish so someone else needs to bring
01:48:02.000 me a drink because this is almost done so it's a perfect time for me to have to...
01:48:05.000 Completely what appeared to be asleep while talking to me and he had a cigarette in his hand and you know...
01:48:11.000 Johnny constantly smoked, and he just stopped his cigarette.
01:48:15.000 Johnny smoked.
01:48:15.000 Johnny this.
01:48:16.000 Johnny that.
01:48:17.000 See, like, this is probably true.
01:48:18.000 Yeah.
01:48:19.000 Because there's no break in the pattern, and it sounds like an episodic memory.
01:48:25.000 And he smells like Virginia Slims.
01:48:27.000 He definitely looks like he smells like Virginia Slims.
01:48:31.000 Yes.
01:48:33.000 Can you imagine being Jenny Depp's acupuncturist?
01:48:39.000 As far as masseuse, we were like, ugh, can you just shower?
01:48:44.000 Hazmat suit.
01:48:44.000 trying to figure out with the nurses and doctors.
01:48:47.000 Or as masseuse, we were like, oh, can you just shower?
01:48:50.000 Yeah.
01:48:51.000 The change and what medications were causing it.
01:48:54.000 Hazmat suit.
01:48:55.000 I knew there were new medications involved.
01:48:58.000 So, you know, I was constantly worried and in communication.
01:49:03.000 And Johnny's behavior got worse and worse.
01:49:05.000 Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny I remember we were on a mountain when he was filming in Boston and we went to this resort retreat hotel.
01:49:34.000 I mean it's pretty tough to argue that the man is not a narcissist who wears more Super Bowl rings than the Chicago Bears.
01:49:41.000 I really didn't know.
01:49:42.000 I felt so bad for him and I thought maybe it was just what Kipper had introduced into the regime, the medications.
01:49:49.000 You just sit and watch him bite a piece of candy off his bracelet.
01:49:56.000 This has all been one big, giant commercial for Ring Pop!
01:49:59.000 Yeah, I knew it.
01:50:00.000 Big Ring Pop.
01:50:02.000 The fun don't stop!
01:50:03.000 Ring Pop!
01:50:04.000 I also have a Cheerio necklace, depending on if I want candy or something healthy.
01:50:10.000 He just laughed!
01:50:12.000 Shit!
01:50:12.000 This is a new drink!
01:50:12.000 I'm not finishing this drink!
01:50:13.000 I'm not finishing this drink!
01:50:16.000 I didn't expect him to laugh this much.
01:50:18.000 I'm not finishing this drink!
01:50:18.000 They've got to be transition lenses or something.
01:50:22.000 Well actually they're not because they're dark inside.
01:50:25.000 He just laughed.
01:50:27.000 Shit!
01:50:28.000 This is a new drink.
01:50:29.000 I'm not finishing this drink.
01:50:30.000 I'm not finishing this drink.
01:50:33.000 I didn't expect him to laugh this much.
01:50:35.000 I'm not finishing this drink.
01:50:37.000 Just take a sip.
01:50:38.000 Yeah, a sip is fine.
01:50:39.000 Two sips.
01:50:40.000 Fine.
01:50:41.000 He could get extra high before he had a detox.
01:50:43.000 Casey, hope you enjoyed your trial run.
01:50:46.000 This is worse than the Biden one.
01:50:48.000 It was such an agonizing few weeks, months.
01:50:53.000 It was so agonizing.
01:50:54.000 I don't know how long it lasted.
01:50:55.000 That's something that seems very fake.
01:50:57.000 When someone says days, weeks, months, eons.
01:51:01.000 It seemed endless.
01:51:03.000 It was so agonizing.
01:51:05.000 Was it?
01:51:06.000 Right.
01:51:07.000 No!
01:51:07.000 Not really.
01:51:10.000 If something was agonizing for months, you'd surely notice.
01:51:16.000 Something that was happening yesterday in her testimony, she was bouncing around between tenses.
01:51:20.000 Wait, she was bouncing?
01:51:21.000 Can we get, do we get?
01:51:26.000 Jump up and down or again, I will have you in contempt.
01:51:29.000 Objection!
01:51:29.000 Overruled.
01:51:31.000 What were you saying there?
01:51:32.000 No, it was like he slapped but then slap and there was this change of tense in when the verbs were happening.
01:51:41.000 Yeah.
01:51:43.000 That's also indicative of fabrication as opposed to just, yeah, he went outside and then he did this and then he did that or something like that.
01:51:48.000 Right.
01:51:49.000 So you have a master's in psychology, is that it?
01:51:51.000 And then you're a PhD candidate?
01:51:53.000 Yes.
01:51:53.000 Okay.
01:51:53.000 Yes, finishing the dissertation as we speak.
01:51:56.000 Okay.
01:51:56.000 So we'll probably need to find his replacement because he's going to go psychoanalyze people.
01:52:00.000 Otherwise, that's just wasted talent here.
01:52:02.000 He practiced on me.
01:52:04.000 Yeah, well, no, urinating on you, that's not a part of... I know, I was like, are you sure you're a doctor?
01:52:10.000 He goes, no, I'm not a doctor.
01:52:12.000 You're like, you told me this was immersion therapy.
01:52:14.000 And he goes, no, I didn't.
01:52:15.000 As long as I don't self-describe as a psychologist, you're totally fine.
01:52:19.000 He said, it's urine therapy.
01:52:21.000 That's right.
01:52:21.000 That doesn't make sense.
01:52:24.000 I love how the camera behind Johnny Depp just moved up to the cleavage behind him.
01:52:30.000 It literally just tilted.
01:52:34.000 There's some guy right now who's like, there's no way C-span's on my camera.
01:52:40.000 The director's like, Camera 2!
01:52:42.000 Stop with the tits!
01:52:42.000 Camera 2!
01:52:43.000 Stop!
01:52:44.000 I'll never stop!
01:52:45.000 Seriously, we're not telling you again.
01:52:47.000 Go a little closer next time.
01:52:51.000 A little bit closer now.
01:52:53.000 A little bit closer now.
01:52:55.000 Let's see them titties now.
01:52:56.000 Let's see some of the titties now.
01:52:57.000 This is all perverts on camera who just see breasts.
01:53:01.000 She knows the game.
01:53:03.000 Your boobs are huge.
01:53:04.000 Can you please describe for the jury?
01:53:08.000 Well, there's a compilation of him and her interacting that I sent.
01:53:12.000 Oh, okay.
01:53:12.000 Well, when there's the next break, we'll watch that and then take chat at Mug Club.
01:53:17.000 First few days, okay.
01:53:19.000 Peaceful.
01:53:21.000 The nurse, and then later nurse and doctor, were staying on a different part of the island.
01:53:28.000 Tell us more about the nurse.
01:53:29.000 She's a sexy nurse.
01:53:30.000 It was a guy.
01:53:31.000 The doctor was a girl.
01:53:32.000 You're lucky to be alive.
01:53:34.000 You don't have a hand for a leg!
01:53:36.000 ATV. The doctor was a girl. But we communicated occasionally through text and the behavior
01:53:45.000 then it just really wasn't okay. It was up, down, he'd be mad at me,
01:53:52.000 then he was wanting a hug, he cried a lot and then he um.
01:54:00.000 Which is weird.
01:54:02.000 Which is weird.
01:54:03.000 You know, wanted to have sex a lot, like, which is... What?
01:54:06.000 Oh, what?
01:54:07.000 Someone who's married to this would want to have sex often?
01:54:10.000 That's insane!
01:54:12.000 That's unheard of!
01:54:13.000 That's so weird!
01:54:14.000 So bizarre!
01:54:15.000 Does that appeal to sexism?
01:54:17.000 Yeah, that's a drink.
01:54:18.000 I mean, it's appealing sex.
01:54:20.000 I think I'm coming up with a diagnosis.
01:54:22.000 He wanted to have sex with me all the time, which is largely the reason he married me.
01:54:28.000 Psychiatrist runs in, like he's disrupting a wedding at, you know, speak now or forever hold your peace.
01:54:33.000 Objection!
01:54:34.000 That's a frigid bitch!
01:54:38.000 Expand on that.
01:54:40.000 What'd you do to him?
01:54:42.000 Did you let him?
01:54:43.000 How many times a week?
01:54:45.000 Because if it's under four, I'm gonna hold you in criminal contempt.
01:54:48.000 Are you a missionary or do you like to get weird like a man crying?
01:54:52.000 How many hammocks do you own?
01:54:53.000 Do you like swings?
01:54:56.000 Like Jesus.
01:54:57.000 You just portrayed Johnny Depp as Jesus.
01:54:58.000 to me about that and tried to overturn this table. Luckily it was like Jesus. You just
01:55:03.000 portray Johnny Depp as Jesus. Good work, Amber. Did she say welded down? Yeah. And thanking me.
01:55:16.000 He does seem like a guy who has like a 5,000 pound table made of wood that doesn't even exist anymore.
01:55:22.000 Right.
01:55:23.000 Like it was taken from the Redwoods.
01:55:24.000 Yeah.
01:55:26.000 Did she just say that he thanked her after sex?
01:55:30.000 Oh, the humanity.
01:55:31.000 Well, I mean, I would imagine.
01:55:33.000 I would.
01:55:34.000 High five, good game.
01:55:36.000 Yeah.
01:55:37.000 Thanks again.
01:55:39.000 I'm gonna give you an ecto-cooler and a chocolate bar.
01:55:42.000 No, please don't poop on the bedspread.
01:55:44.000 I saved his life, and he wouldn't be doing this without me.
01:55:48.000 I was telling him these things, and I was... At one point in our conversations, I told him about how... Objection, Your Honor.
01:55:54.000 Hear say.
01:55:57.000 Please try to continue without what you said, please.
01:56:01.000 Um... I said something to him, and uh... No more, there can't be any more objections.
01:56:11.000 But he did it, like, while crying.
01:56:14.000 It was the weirdest thing.
01:56:15.000 It's like a drink, you never know when you have too much of something and it tastes bad, but then you have more of it, and then it tastes good again.
01:56:22.000 Pretty good.
01:56:22.000 That's a good thing!
01:56:24.000 It's like amber.
01:56:26.000 That's where I am.
01:56:27.000 I object!
01:56:29.000 Baaaaaah!
01:56:31.000 But you know, I didn't want to make him feel embarrassed.
01:56:38.000 Oh, fuck!
01:56:41.000 I shouldn't have done that drunken Mr. Miyagi bit.
01:56:45.000 She can't do it.
01:56:47.000 It's actually a heartbreaking scene.
01:56:51.000 It really is.
01:56:52.000 I've had life before!
01:56:56.000 Yes, I have!
01:57:00.000 I'm the doctor's nurse's student.
01:57:04.000 There's like four people who remember this.
01:57:05.000 This is a heartbreaking scene.
01:57:06.000 It really is.
01:57:07.000 He's an unbelievable actor.
01:57:08.000 I forgot that scene existed until I showed it to my son a couple years ago.
01:57:12.000 Yeah.
01:57:12.000 I was like, I forgot about this really sad drunk guy.
01:57:16.000 He's my favorite Japanese actor named Pat.
01:57:18.000 Yes, by far.
01:57:19.000 You're screaming at me.
01:57:24.000 Was his name on Happy Days?
01:57:27.000 Oh, I don't remember.
01:57:29.000 Arnold?
01:57:30.000 Was it Arnold?
01:57:31.000 Pat Morita?
01:57:33.000 Oh, his name's Pat Morita.
01:57:34.000 Alright, hold on.
01:57:35.000 I want to see if she's correct.
01:57:36.000 We'll go out to Mug Club and find out his name.
01:57:38.000 Chances are it's not even the same guy.
01:57:40.000 No!
01:57:43.000 It's Jet Li.
01:57:48.000 He was, um, accusing me of having A man in the house with me.
01:57:53.000 Oh, where could he ever get that idea?
01:57:55.000 Again.
01:57:56.000 You know, in a cabinet.
01:57:57.000 It's basically one room with a closet and a bathroom.
01:58:00.000 And an elevator with James Franco in it.
01:58:03.000 Tied, really?
01:58:03.000 I mean, there's a closet and a bathroom.
01:58:05.000 And he, at one point... And a Tesla with Elon Musk in it.
01:58:08.000 I was hiding somebody in the house.
01:58:12.000 Another point, he was communicating with someone not in the room.
01:58:18.000 This sounds like she's trying to describe psychosis that she read from a textbook, which, by the way, has never been presented anywhere else.
01:58:26.000 Remember we were talking about the MMPI-2 test?
01:58:29.000 And you can take it online.
01:58:32.000 You can at least look at some of the questions, because I know that that was where the psychologist said that she uh, was lying through the test and I was curious about this
01:58:40.000 and there are questions like that exactly. Right. Do you speak to people in the room who aren't
01:58:44.000 there? Right. Do you see, so it sounds to me like she read through a psychological textbook and
01:58:48.000 she's trying to ascribe that to him whereas these are never concerns she brought up before
01:58:52.000 that, before now. Right.
01:58:54.000 And the MMPI is good in that regard.
01:58:56.000 I mean, I don't want to give away all the secrets, but questions on there are critical items that nobody responds to correctly, but if they're trying to sound crazy, they will.
01:59:06.000 Like, sometimes I see in black and white.
01:59:09.000 No, you don't.
01:59:10.000 Well, and also, is it really that when he's going, Hey, is the guy who was banging my wife still here?
01:59:17.000 Yeah.
01:59:17.000 He's not talking to no one.
01:59:18.000 He's trying to find someone in this house.
01:59:21.000 He's like, Elon?
01:59:22.000 Uncle Frank?
01:59:25.000 James?
01:59:25.000 Buzz?
01:59:28.000 They make for a fun conversation though, clinically, like I've had clients and you go over the test with them and you'd be like, so sometimes you see black and white, say more.
01:59:37.000 I'm a racist.
01:59:39.000 Okay, well, that was a misinterpretation.
01:59:40.000 That was weird.
01:59:41.000 All right, let's see what you see two colors.
01:59:45.000 Yes.
01:59:47.000 The process of detox in LA.
01:59:50.000 And I had my friends out with my girlfriends there to support me as per usual.
01:59:56.000 So let's, Michelle can you pull up 272 please?
02:00:00.000 Detox in LA is a girl's night?
02:00:02.000 Just showing up with like bachelorette party with like penis lollipops.
02:00:06.000 Detox!
02:00:08.000 Detox night.
02:00:09.000 Detox per usual.
02:00:11.000 Seaweed wrap!
02:00:12.000 Did Mr. Depp communicate with you?
02:00:17.000 I snuck in some mineral spirits.
02:00:19.000 We're gonna take laxatives.
02:00:24.000 There's eating raw corn husks.
02:00:28.000 Johnny's really been shitting the bed lately.
02:00:31.000 Yeah.
02:00:32.000 Oh!
02:00:32.000 I really didn't mean to poop his bed.
02:00:33.000 I think it was maybe the corn cob pipe that I ate.
02:00:35.000 I don't know.
02:00:38.000 Let's drink turpentine and ruin some sheets.
02:00:40.000 And your honor's ruling on that.
02:00:43.000 Can we redact that second message?
02:00:44.000 I'll redact it.
02:00:45.000 Ma'am, what color is your hair?
02:00:56.000 I don't know anymore!
02:00:58.000 Do you and Johnny share the same five-color hair dye?
02:01:04.000 Well, no.
02:01:05.000 No.
02:01:05.000 He uses just for men and I use just for bitches.
02:01:10.000 Actually, it's mostly for bitches.
02:01:11.000 It's a generic.
02:01:13.000 It's next to it at Walmart.
02:01:15.000 For God's sakes, I only got $7 million out of this.
02:01:19.000 Sorry, after I gave to charity $7 million out of this.
02:01:21.000 Sorry, after I gave to charity $7 million out of this.
02:01:26.000 Yes.
02:01:27.000 Oh, this is a good text.
02:01:28.000 Okay, just to let you know, I'm fine my angel.
02:01:31.000 I miss you, of course, but this was the right thing to do to speed up the process.
02:01:34.000 I love you more than life.
02:01:35.000 Yours, Steve.
02:01:37.000 This is sent to Amber Heard.
02:01:39.000 All right, let's see what she says.
02:01:41.000 Yours, Steve.
02:01:42.000 You see that?
02:01:44.000 I do.
02:01:45.000 So what, if any, expressions was Mr. Depp giving you at this point that he was angry with you ever?
02:01:53.000 Having to help participate with the detox or to be on the island or anything along that line.
02:01:58.000 Objection.
02:01:59.000 Form.
02:02:00.000 Compound.
02:02:02.000 I'll allow it, but just... I would have objected.
02:02:05.000 That was definitely a compounding question.
02:02:06.000 To say two has already been entered into evidence without that reaction, and there wasn't any objection, so I would wish... If I could have both sides to keep track of their evidence, it's not my job to keep Also, I object to Johnny Depp's representation, silly
02:02:20.000 barber pole tie.
02:02:22.000 It's really the party's responsibility to take care of the record, not mine.
02:02:30.000 My apologies on that one, your honor.
02:02:35.000 She really does have dead's eyes, like the doll's eyes.
02:02:38.000 Oh, she does, yeah.
02:02:40.000 And when she comes for half your shit and those eyes are all white.
02:02:46.000 No legal notification or papers have been sent.
02:02:50.000 She writes her article on HuffPo.
02:02:53.000 Sometimes gold-digging ore goes away.
02:02:58.000 Sometimes gold-digging ore doesn't go away.
02:03:00.000 Have we got another one?
02:03:02.000 Sometimes gold-digging ore gives you MDMA and looks into your soul.
02:03:08.000 Let's see what this text is.
02:03:12.000 And she said, I can't live without you.
02:03:15.000 You are my everything.
02:03:16.000 There are no words.
02:03:17.000 Fake, fake, fake, fake.
02:03:18.000 I just want you to be okay and happy.
02:03:21.000 I love you more every single day.
02:03:23.000 Can't imagine my life without you.
02:03:27.000 Hey, by the way, that kind of gets to the abuse of don't leave, don't leave, don't leave.
02:03:32.000 When someone is abusive, they try and make it so that you cannot leave.
02:03:35.000 That's a big thing.
02:03:36.000 Right.
02:03:39.000 And it's often combined with them leaving temporarily and coming back so they put you on your heels and you fear being abandoned while they make you know that if you abandon them they could kill themselves.
02:03:50.000 They want to put the responsibility of you on you and the responsibility of them on you.
02:03:55.000 And that's what she's doing.
02:03:57.000 I'm not a psychologist, but that's... No, but you're definitely on to something.
02:04:00.000 And then there's also the pattern disruption that she would engage in, of like, don't go, don't go, don't go.
02:04:06.000 Okay, that breaks him from what he wants to do.
02:04:09.000 Then the little thing in your mind, the periaqueductal gray matter, to geek out for a second, makes you notice when your freedom is being inhibited.
02:04:18.000 Right.
02:04:18.000 And then anger starts to come up.
02:04:20.000 But then if that anger starts to come out, then, oh no, we can't talk right now.
02:04:24.000 Right.
02:04:26.000 Yeah, that makes sense.
02:04:27.000 And then she puts on, she dresses like Samuel Adams.
02:04:33.000 Well, I bargained with him about me doing the role.
02:04:38.000 He told me... Uh, Drink, that's her mentioning her role in a movie.
02:04:42.000 Oh, gosh.
02:04:44.000 Well, the only role I'm concerned with is the lack of them you were taking in the hay!
02:04:50.000 Oh, he's dying laughing.
02:04:53.000 Oh, my God.
02:04:56.000 Don't say what you said, just say what he said, okay?
02:05:01.000 I'm not finishing any more drinks.
02:05:02.000 I don't care what the rules are.
02:05:03.000 He reluctantly kind of agreed to me working on this movie, or auditioning a job.
02:05:14.000 It was a movie in London at the time.
02:05:15.000 It's called Paramedic.
02:05:17.000 Enjoy your weekend.
02:05:22.000 I wore no makeup, or minimal makeup in the movie.
02:05:27.000 No sexy clothing.
02:05:28.000 She just talked about how good looking she is.
02:05:30.000 I did everything I could to not make myself attractive and, you know, it's a lost cause.
02:05:37.000 I was like, no makeup.
02:05:38.000 And they looked and they said, I thought you were wearing all the makeup.
02:05:41.000 And I didn't wear any revealing clothing.
02:05:42.000 And they said, sweetheart, you'd be gorgeous if you wore a tarp.
02:05:47.000 And I said, no.
02:05:48.000 I said, no.
02:05:49.000 Is it even if you dress like Shakespeare on the witness stand?
02:05:55.000 I was there for my last, like, day or two of filming.
02:05:57.000 Here, take this skull.
02:05:59.000 She's holding it the whole time.
02:06:00.000 We need, like, a humble brag counter.
02:06:03.000 I'm going to, uh, ask you to turn to... It's not even, like, humble bragging.
02:06:08.000 It's just bragging, bragging.
02:06:09.000 ...Defendants 310.
02:06:14.000 She just looked like she was confused a little bit, like maybe she was surprised by something.
02:06:18.000 Like 310.
02:06:19.000 I can't count that far.
02:06:21.000 I'm going to object to the exhibit.
02:06:23.000 It's hearsay.
02:06:23.000 More hearsay.
02:06:24.000 about auditioning for another role in this time frame.
02:06:27.000 Objection, Your Honor.
02:06:29.000 I'm going to object to the exhibit.
02:06:31.000 It's hearsay.
02:06:32.000 More hearsay.
02:06:33.000 Oh, she is getting ragdolled.
02:06:40.000 She is getting ragdolled.
02:06:42.000 She just can't get a rhythm going.
02:06:44.000 I think they saw what happened yesterday, where she was going off, you know, these soliloquies.
02:06:48.000 And then, and then you realize, and this, and they just decided that if she can't do that, she has no sort of factual leg to stand on.
02:06:55.000 So let's make her have to stick to the facts.
02:06:59.000 So, it's a pretty good contrast to show when she can talk and she can opine, which people saw yesterday and they felt like they were being manipulated, and then today.
02:07:05.000 It's a good strategy for the attorney to say, let's make sure now that there's no hearsay allowed, there's no, you know, painting it with a brush of your point of view, let's stick to what is allowable, what is admissible, and she can't do it.
02:07:17.000 This is really bad for her.
02:07:20.000 And I still don't think he's going to win the defamation.
02:07:24.000 Agreed.
02:07:25.000 But I think he's won.
02:07:28.000 He does just donate the money to wherever she said she was going to.
02:07:34.000 Yeah.
02:07:36.000 Or donate it to, like, the opposing charity.
02:07:38.000 Yeah.
02:07:39.000 Like, if she was going to donate to PETA, donate it to, like, the Seal Killing Foundation.
02:07:43.000 What's the opposing charity for a children's hospital?
02:07:46.000 Well, she said ACLU and then Jones Hospital, I don't know, like the hospital for the elderly.
02:07:50.000 Yeah, instead of battered housewives, he just sends it to batter housewives.
02:07:55.000 Yes.
02:07:55.000 The Ghislaine Maxwell Legal Fund.
02:08:02.000 and he was furious at me for, he found, like, a book about, like,
02:08:10.000 Alright, you know what guys?
02:08:15.000 I can't do this.
02:08:15.000 I'm gonna be drunk.
02:08:16.000 Let's, uh, look.
02:08:17.000 We're gonna see you- Are we Thursday?
02:08:19.000 It is Thursday.
02:08:20.000 Shut up.
02:08:20.000 Is it Thursday? It is Thursday. Shut up. Shut up you piece of shit. Hey, hold on. You're going to be in Lincoln,
02:08:37.000 Missouri.
02:08:40.000 Something like that, yeah.
02:08:41.000 Lincoln, Nebraska.
02:08:42.000 Where are you going to be?
02:08:43.000 Lincoln, Nebraska.
02:08:44.000 And Springfield, Missouri.
02:08:45.000 Is there Springfield, Missouri?
02:08:47.000 There's a Burger King there, right here.
02:08:49.000 We'll just throw it over the fence.
02:08:50.000 When you're done with it, take what you want.
02:08:52.000 Just give me what you don't want and let's throw it over the fence.
02:08:54.000 And then I'm gonna be in Spokane, I don't know, somewhere in July.
02:08:58.000 It's a secret show.