On this episode, we talk about dicks, cars, and other shit. We also talk about the new slingshot and how it's the coolest thing we've ever seen. We talk about what it's like driving a kid's toy around LA, and how awesome it is to drive a car that's a lot smaller than a normal car. We then talk about our plans to buy a new car and how much it's going to cost, and what we're going to do with it. We finish up the episode with some car talk, and then we talk a little bit about our weekend, and our plans for the new car we're getting. Shoutout to our sponsor, for sponsoring this episode. We hope you like it, and if you don't like it you'll give us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts! or wherever else you get your stuff. We're working on transcribing this and putting it on a podcast so we can make more episodes in the future. We'll get back to you next week with a new episode, so stay tuned for that! XOXO, EJ and Shubbz! -The Guys Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Music by PSOVOD and tyops by Kevin McLeod. Theme by Mavus White. Artwork by Jeff Kaale. Music by Skynet. Thanks for listening and supporting this episode of the podcast, and thanks for all your support. and love you guys for making us a safe and sound quality episode. Thank you so much love you all. -Shout out to my good vibes and support us out there! -Shob and all the support we can do our lives! - Thank you for all the love and support you're making this podcast is so much more than we can handle it. Thank you, Shob and you're amazing. Shob, we really appreciate it, we appreciate you, thank you, Thank you all so much, we'll keep you. XO, bye, bye. xoxo, bye -Elliott, -PAT & JUICY, JUICEY, RYAN, JACOB, JAY & GABE, JY & JY, MABY, SONGS, MURCHES, and KAREN, JEROME, AND KEVIN.
00:06:36.000I don't think you should be able to tell people what to do, but I think guidelines for young people are very important because they make impulsive decisions, and you could protect more of them if you made a mandatory helmet law.
00:06:47.000Maybe you should say, up to age 30, and over age 30, you do whatever the fuck you want.
00:06:52.000Well, that's why they do it, because you can't have all those loopholes, can you?
00:10:05.000Like, his craziness is part of the reason why it's so appealing.
00:10:08.000Like, when Oscar De La Hoya was talking shit about the Mayweather-McGregor fight, and he goes, he was like, LOL, is this guy sniffing coke again?
00:10:36.000Don't make the fucking cross-dressing!
00:10:39.000Don't make the UFC with the whatever 10 million followers blast a picture in high heels, bitch.
00:10:44.000And it went out without even him having to do it.
00:10:46.000If it's one thing, too, if it's an obvious second thing, and you say the first thing and be real mild, everybody else would pick up the slack.
00:12:12.000When you look into it, that Toronto ball, like so many guys, an article came out today, I think on Fox, Fox Sports, an article came out today of this guy who's a minor league baseball player, and he's pro now, and he's tested twice for it, positive, and a third time, and he's waiting to see if he gets banned for life,
00:12:28.000because three strikes, you're out in baseball.
00:12:46.000He's not supposed to be taking anything.
00:12:47.000You're talking about a guy who's already lost his ability to make a living from Mexican dick pills.
00:12:52.000Like, why would he ever just take something off the shelf at GNC? Well, we're not giving the guy kudos because he's the smartest tool in the shed.
00:14:02.000But when I see that, and I see how big of an issue it is in baseball, in minor league baseball, USADA and the commission might be like, fuck, look at all these guys, man.
00:16:04.000That's why when you look at the evidence, you're like, this small amount of Toronto ball, and you see all the other guys testing positive for it, how much would this really help him?
00:16:23.000And listen, I've been the fucking poster boy of making fun of John on this stuff, but in all seriousness, where do we say, alright, most guys are doing it?
00:17:04.000So we're going to tarnish John's name, and he's not the greatest of all time, but it's like, okay, but then you pay to watch Overeem fight.
00:17:11.000You pay to watch Vitor Bell for a fight.
00:17:13.000You know, like, we don't know exactly who's doing what.
00:17:16.000Right, but if Overeem becomes a champ, I guarantee if he pisses hot as a champ, people turn on him, too.
00:17:21.000No, I get it, but he's tested for way worse things than John has.
00:17:47.000I know, but let's just think about what they are.
00:17:49.000So he tested positive for testosterone, I believe.
00:17:52.000Well, if you test positive for that, and if he had an exemption, that means his levels were on that Vitor Belfort, Nate Markart shit, where they test you like, holy fuck, man!
00:18:50.000They're the same ones who wanted to ban Nick for life and fucking told Connor he owes him like $2 million and then he has to shoot a commercial for him.
00:19:45.000But just the scolding that she was giving one of the fighters while this was all going down, when they were going over some sort of a positive test.
00:20:55.000Also, you've got to realize, when they brought on Nowitzki, is they were trying to paint the picture to sell it for the most money possible to be taken serious.
00:21:02.000So you sign this huge Reebok endorsement deal.
00:22:22.000They earned it, too, because you think about where the business was before they came along and how they were 40-plus million dollars in debt when they filmed The Ultimate Fighter.
00:22:31.000They were losing so much fucking money.
00:23:50.000Like, look up, scroll up and look at that picture of him.
00:23:52.000Does it just happen, no matter what, that after a while you almost become like a caricature?
00:23:58.000You become one of Tim Burton's characters?
00:24:01.000Yeah, I mean, you paint yourself as the odd fellow who's, you know, on the outside for the longest time, and then all of a sudden you become this blockbuster guy.
00:24:12.000Because Johnny Depp for the longest time used to talk about, because he's a very respected actor.
00:25:59.000The top of the food chain, dope-ass Ferrari.
00:26:01.000I mean, maybe you just like Ferraris, but then, you know, maybe you just buy a yacht, maybe you buy a this, and maybe you buy a that, and then you sign a deal to do the show that you don't even want to do anymore, but you have to sign that deal now, because you've got a $12 million mansion in Malibu!
00:27:08.000But my thought is, when you're a dude like him, and you got a girl like that, and you're having a great time, one of the great things to do is probably just buy a ton of shit.
00:27:49.000Next thing you know, you're standing on the fucking red carpet with eyeliner on, and silver chains, and your shirt is opening your chest, and you're acting like you're in some crazy indie rock band, and you're 53. You become a caricature.
00:28:32.000I forget who he's playing, but the guys...
00:28:33.000They announced yesterday he signed for a new show on Showtime where he's playing a comedian that's freaking out later in life or something like that.
00:30:32.000If you think about most shows, ratings are down in general, but look at things that are more organic and real, like your show, like other podcasts, like other shows on YouTube, stuff like that, where it's not so bullshit, producer telling you how to feel,
00:30:49.000But they're stuck in that model because they have commercials.
00:30:52.000They're stuck in that model because those commercials that they have to interrupt their show with, everything has to kind of wrap up every few minutes.
00:31:39.000Sometimes they do that, like, this show is brought to you commercial-free by, and then you don't get it, but they still announce that every fucking day.
00:36:47.000There's a woman that works for ESPN, a very specific person, not ESPN, you know, telling lies, should apologize or whatever the fuck he wrote.
00:38:07.000He says a one-liner, and all these people are saying, should he be fired from CNN for saying that he would poison Trump if he had, you know, good luck, the Secret Service is going to contact you.
00:38:17.000And so I look at his fucking Twitter page, man, and it's crazy.
00:38:22.000All these fucking psychos are telling the Secret Service they should investigate at CNN. Are you going to fire him like you fired Reza Aslan?
00:39:02.000People just decide they can try to affect something, and then things start getting ramped up.
00:39:06.000The momentum kicks in, all these other people jump on board, and they get excited about being a part of a group that wants to get Anthony Bourdain kicked off the air.
00:39:12.000Because they want some sort of weird direction.
00:39:16.000They think they're important enough where they can get these people fired, and they think if they get together enough, they're going to have the power to affect that person's life.
00:39:22.000And they can even believe they're right.
00:40:24.000His character, the way he can enunciate clearly.
00:40:27.000To me, he was like a good representative of what I would like to see as a calm, peaceful, educated American who's smart and is just affable.
00:42:09.000You know, they've negotiated with the hostages like in Iran to make sure that the hostages weren't released until after Ronald Reagan was elected president.
00:42:21.000That means you kept Americans imprisoned extra so that you would look good and they would be released when this fucking actor with slick black hair Gotta crack a few eggs and make an omelet, my man.
00:44:15.000If the person believes in God, the 214 General Social Survey reported that 21% of Americans had no religion, with 3% being atheists and 5% agnostic.
00:44:30.000You cannot be, I just don't think, I shouldn't say this in a blanket term, because maybe it can happen, but I just think it's not a good strategy if you're just trying to get into office.
00:44:39.000Because Trump was never religious, and now he talks about God all the time.
00:44:43.000Now it's all, you know, God this and God that.
00:44:47.000I mean, it's like words that you have to say, like ma'am and sir, that don't totally make sense to you.
00:44:52.000Well, did you, I heard the, uh, I think the governor or maybe it's the mayor of Florida when the hurricane is about to hit, I'm watching, I'm just balls deep in it on the hurricane stuff.
00:45:00.000He's interviewing, he goes, you know what, you know, your money's great, but the biggest thing is you just pray for us.
00:45:23.000Did you see this going around yesterday afternoon?
00:45:25.000Facebook got in trouble after some people were digging into the advertising thing that was going around also yesterday with the algorithms.
00:45:33.000Some people were looking into the Russian.
00:45:35.000I think someone uncovered that $100,000 had been paid to either some Russian ad agency or something.
00:45:40.000I didn't follow the exact story, but digging into that, they found this.
00:45:47.000An algorithm created this tag to people and labeled them as Jew-haters, and so someone could buy a targeted ad to them, and what I guess they were assuming is that Trump people did it, or they were...
00:46:06.000I could put out an ad if I was buying for Hillary, for instance, in this situation, or for Trump, and target it towards people that were labeled as Jew-haters.
00:47:07.000In the same vein, I was going to ask you a second ago, when you said you were looking at Anthony Bourdain's Twitter account, you saw a bunch of hate.
00:47:42.000You could send the messages that you want, you could set up a couple keywords, and 500 accounts will just start sending those messages out.
00:48:16.000And that's why when Twitter and Instagram, they can do a flush of all those bot accounts.
00:48:20.000So you'll see a lot of people's followers, like Kim Kardashian, she lost like 3 million because they're a bunch of bot accounts, like fake accounts.
00:48:47.000But let me just explain my position on this.
00:48:50.000When she shows all these pictures of her giant, perfect ass, she's showing an extremely unrealistic representation of a human being.
00:49:00.000So what she does is she hires a photographer to follow her everywhere and take pictures, and then they Photoshop the shit out of them, they clean away all the lumps, and then she looks amazing, right?
00:49:10.000So when she was on the beach, They were taking pictures of her and she didn't know they were there.
00:49:20.000That is all fat that someone stuffed into your ass like a giant diaper.
00:49:25.000And when they smooth it out and put it on Instagram with all the retouches and everything like that, this forces women to think that this is possible.
00:49:39.000And she's got a body that makes sense.
00:49:41.000And she makes her look like Mr. Burns' ass.
00:49:43.000Heck, if you have a giant head and then a tiny little nose, like one of them plastic surgery noses, people are going to go, hey, what's going on here?
00:50:08.000These fucking guys with syphilis that were losing their hair and started wearing wigs, everybody started shaving their head and wearing those goddamn powdered wigs because they looked like those guys.
00:55:46.000That way, when you see their ass, you know that is an earned ass.
00:55:50.000That's not some fat experiment in Dr. Frankenstein's lab.
00:55:54.000I don't have to picture you with a tube running down your mouth to keep you alive.
00:55:58.000But you got a fucking, you know, your nose is taped up and you're lying there with your eyes rolled back in your head while they fucking pumping into your ass like a caulking gun.
00:56:33.000You don't want to have sex with someone who doesn't feel good.
00:56:35.000You don't want to have sex with someone who's like, I'm barely making it.
00:56:38.000Like, if you get a staph infection because someone's been pumping fat into your asshole, and then all of a sudden you're feeling sad, but you still have this big ass, is that sexy?
01:01:47.000Please go to reputablelaserysurgeon.com Buy one, get one next to the weed clinic.
01:01:52.000You don't want a deal on an eye surgery.
01:01:54.000You do not want a deal on eye surgery, ass surgery, or tattoos.
01:01:58.000Did you hear about that one person that got arrested?
01:02:00.000They were giving people ass jobs, and they were pretending to be a doctor, and they weren't a doctor, and they were shooting all kinds of stuff into people's asses.
01:05:01.000But I'm just saying, as far as failing tests, if you would just go by failed tests, if you look at Mark Hunt's career, and you went through, and guys that have tests positive, you're like, oh my, no wonder he's infuriated at people.
01:09:09.000Like, at what point does, when you hear that, does the UFC and the commission go, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's stop, let's stop, let's stop.
01:10:29.000Well, at a certain point, you have to have some sort of a regulation that stops people from hurting themselves when they've taken too much damage and they can't make good decisions anymore, right?
01:10:39.000But then it becomes a personal freedom issue.
01:14:30.000He was just looking promising, and then all of a sudden he gets to the UFC, he feels the crowd, all the Irish people behind him, and he starts just talking shit and going off, and then people love it, and then he talks more shit, goes off more, then he starts predicting what round he's going to merc people in,
01:14:45.000and then he starts pulling it off, and then he's like, who the fuck is that guy?
01:16:40.000So I have a hard time, once they come clean with this, they come out with this, I don't think it's ever been proven once that they said that a person had tested positive for something and that that person had never actually taken that thing.
01:17:54.000From GMC, and maybe you take a bunch of shit, and you thought everything was good, and then you get tested positive.
01:18:00.000Before you say anything, I never took steroids, like, you have to find out what the fuck it is was in those things.
01:18:07.000So you have to report those things, and then they have to check, and then they have to independently buy those things from a shelf from somewhere else to do confirmation.
01:18:31.000I just think it could go a long ways with his fans and everything going on if he came out and was just like, let me tell you guys, you're going to hear this.
01:18:38.000Because the public right now, we see Test A, Test B, both positive.
01:20:38.000Way less are now, but I think for the longest time.
01:20:42.00042 supplements, including some that are available at GNC, can trigger a positive test for Toronto Ball.
01:20:49.000Yeah, this is that Fox Sports article.
01:20:50.000Baseball officials said the Cubs again were reminded this week that players should use only supplements certified by NSF International, an independent organization, to test and approve products.
01:21:05.000Look, the union, however, is concerned about the run of suspension of Terranobol and continues to seek evidence that might shed light on why some players are testing positive because so many guys are testing positive for it.
01:21:15.000Well, isn't this a short-acting drug, though, that's out of your system fairly quickly?
01:21:19.000I think that was the thing about this stuff.
01:21:44.000And a few hours are out of your system.
01:21:46.000The other thing, just like we're doing now with baseball, like Barry Bonds, Mark McGuire, Sammy Sosa, at the time we're like, oh my god, PEDs, home runs, that doesn't count.
01:21:55.000Years go by, we're like, those guys are still pretty fucking good.
01:23:11.000It's one of the things that Nowitzki stressed that I really believe.
01:23:14.000You've got to kind of, before casting 100% judgment on him, you've got to let it play out.
01:23:19.000But this is the thing, when you say let it play out, again, I know I'm playing both sides of the field here, but when you say let it play out, we know he has a history of fucking up.
01:23:27.000So you're going to hang him before it's actually come out, because we go, no, he's consistently good at beating people up and fucking up.
01:26:42.000Yeah, those are two ideas that look good.
01:26:45.000To sell to another company and make it legit.
01:26:47.000But the thing is, like, if you can get a better deal, like, right, you have a deal with Reebok, goes for so long, and then if it's profitable for Reebok, then Adidas comes in and goes, hey, we like what you're doing here.
01:27:00.000And then you have a bidding war between Adidas and Reebok, and then maybe Nike thinks about it, too.
01:27:05.000And, you know, if you can prove that you're cleaning the sport up, right, with USADA, that's a very smart move to get a big company to invest in the sport.
01:28:39.000If they're being smart, though, for the UFC, to bring in a big sponsor like Reebok, that's a good way to ensure that you've got a clean sport that you represent.
01:29:21.000Like when you see that, like if I was Reebok, I'd be like, hey, this guy can't do, we can't sponsor a fight with this guy as a ref ever again.
01:29:28.000Reebok doesn't know the sport that well to do that.
01:30:59.000Victor Conte, the guy who got busted in the Balco scandal when he was on the podcast, what he said to me, he was like, if you fail one of those post-weigh-in tests, that's an intelligence test.
01:35:42.000You don't see Don Frye all the time being interviewed on TV. You don't think about his fight with Takayama when they both stood in front of each other and blasted each other in the face over and over and over again.
01:37:12.000So if he were to come on and be like, hey, I have brain trauma with CT, I don't feel like most people are like, oh, it's terrible, I'm not watching anymore.
01:37:19.000Well, you feel bad, like, you know, you see someone slurring their words.
01:37:21.000You ever see Joe Frazier before he died?
01:38:54.000Well, the other issue is, is UFC's, especially as, I should say mixed martial arts, hate when everyone calls mixed martial arts UFC, but mixed martial arts is so new in the grand scheme of things compared to other sports.
01:39:21.000And now the NFL's going, ah, we're going to look into that.
01:39:23.000Now the NFL only has, I think, 14 days of pad work where they're in pads during the season, but they want to eliminate that.
01:39:30.000But that sport's been around for a grip.
01:39:32.000The best saving grace for the sport would be, or the best hope for the sport would be medical science.
01:39:40.000Medical science comes along with some sort of stem cell regeneration thing that allows your brain to come back to 100%, which is totally possible.
01:39:49.000You just think about what they can do with other parts of your body, the way they can repair things.
01:39:53.000The brain is far more complicated than anything we have to deal with, but if you could somehow or another reignite the body's ability to heal itself, and in fact, They have a new chip that they're working on now where they install it in a person's body,
01:40:10.000and it reprograms your genes, and they think it can repair brain trauma, injuries, tissue damage, and even the effects of aging.
01:42:34.000They have a bunch of dudes with boxes of these chips sitting by, and you're down, your head's mashed in like that fucking guy, the mountain from Game of Thrones, crushed.
01:42:44.000And they just stick that shit on your eyeballs, just pop right back into place, like, whoa, that guy's strong.
01:42:51.000Then we start, you know what happens then?
01:44:50.000Escalating sort of technological race like one invention like this is going to allow for the idea of several other different inventions And maybe they'll come up with something they add this to CRISPR you know CRISPR this new genetic Reprogramming I don't know the best way to describe it,
01:45:09.000but it's a tool for altering genetics now they get a hold of that and they use it with this so you use CRISPR and this you got the Hulk and You got Jon Jones and Brock Lesnar baby.
01:45:43.000That was the best, when the Hulk grabs that fucking Thor's brother, and he's like, I'm a god, and he just grabs him and just rags him on the ground, back and forth, busts up the concrete.
01:45:54.000I fucking love the idea that some peaceful Mark Ruffalo character, who's this brilliant scientist, who's concerned with helping people, if you piss this motherfucker off, he becomes a bulletproof giant.
01:46:09.000Not only did it happen so quick that he tried to shoot himself in the mouth, and by the time the bullet hit the skin, the Hulk spit out the bullet.
01:58:31.000I mean, I would assume that zebras, much like any other animal that lives in the wild, you know, if you can get to ten years, congratulations, you did something amazing.
02:00:40.000That's kind of a ghillie suit where it has all this extra phrase to it that you would use that if you were hunting turkeys because turkeys can see real good.
02:00:50.000When you're wearing that, the idea is that all those stripes break up your outline.
02:00:54.000That's sort of the exact same reason why a zebra has that shit.
02:04:21.000It's entirely possible, especially with predators apparently, entirely possible that animals emit some sort of an electrical signal that animals are attracted to.
02:04:31.000And then when they see this person wearing this hex suit, those signals don't come through and they don't know what the fuck you are.
02:05:14.000They've done extensive studies on what animals do and don't see, as far as camouflage, and I think one of the ways they've done that, and what kind of light they see, one of the ways they've done that is through, like, they have, like, deer farms where they have undulates in captivity, and they feed them,
02:05:30.000and they only feed them if they can see certain things, or they show them certain things, and that's how they measure whether or not they're actually able to recognize patterns.
02:05:41.000Because some patterns are really good.
02:05:43.000Like some patterns just completely break up the outline of a person to an animal and the animal just sees some weird shit that looks like a bush.
02:05:52.000Size of the mesh is crucial to effectively blocking human electricity.
02:05:55.000This Faraday cage is what it's explaining, which is the part I was just kind of looking at.
02:06:00.000Invented in 1836, so just before a dude invented chiropractic by an English scientist, Michael Faraday, a Faraday cage is an enclosure made out of a conductive mesh material that blocks electrical fields.
02:06:14.000By channeling the electricity through the mesh, it's used to protect electronic equipment from lightning strikes, Or in screen rooms, which allows for environments to be free of electromagnetic interference.
02:11:58.000The problem with that is, well, I'm worried about that.
02:12:01.000I'm worried about you being next to your girl, and your girl sticks your phone right on your face, starts it up, and then is like, oh, look at this motherfucker, Jamie Vernon with a bunch of dick pics.
02:17:11.000They're not allowed to enter your password.
02:17:13.000They're not allowed for you to ask what the password is.
02:17:16.000That's why they'd say, for people, you should not use the fingerprint part because cops can actually actively use it because it's not specifically stated.
02:17:26.000Like, you're not allowed- It's a loophole.
02:17:41.000Yeah, it's like technology moving too fast and we don't have the words and the language and the preparations to deal with that shit.
02:17:52.000There's a new system built into the iOS 11 which comes out in a couple days that allows you to Bypass that sort of if you quick tap five times you can turn off touch ID Hmm, so it's like it's basically what they're calling it is a cop Yeah,
02:18:08.000I just don't think that's the way to go the facial recognition thing just seems Corny.
02:18:23.000I gotta do this every time I want to buy something How come I can't just put my fucking thumb on it?
02:18:45.000So they went with facial recognition, which they've already had for Snapchat and for Instagram filters and all those things where they see your face and then turn you into Abraham Lincoln or some shit.
02:19:40.000They just go on, like, little photo shoot dates with their, like, girls two and two, three, four, five at a time, and they're just taking pictures of each other.
02:19:47.000They don't need to hire the photographer anymore.
02:23:01.000First case of a seemingly simple and safe procedure of penis enlargement by autologous fat transfer caused a sudden death of a healthy young man, according to the report.
02:23:12.000Doctors believe this is the first case.
02:23:37.000So it's like a big, giant guy with a tiny head.
02:23:39.000There's this steroid dude, there's pictures of him on the internet, and his head is the size of a softball, and his body is as wide as his table.
02:26:53.000See, when you said that's your favorite movie, I completely judge you because I was based on that because that's why I was so bad.
02:26:59.000But that girl was in an amazing movie that nobody's ever heard of called Killing Zoe.
02:27:05.000It came out right around the time that, see, Pulp Fiction was made by Quentin Tarantino and Roger Avery.
02:27:14.000A lot of people forgot about Roger Avery.
02:27:16.000Roger Avery was a brilliant, brilliant screenwriter, really interesting guy, and he went to jail for like a drunk driving accident on the PCH in Malibu, like serious stuff, and he was actually tweeting from jail for a while.
02:27:30.000Yeah, it was way, way, way back in the day.
02:27:35.000But Roger Avery was tweeting from jail, like really interesting shit.
02:27:40.000And one of the things that came out of that was that Quentin Tarantino used to have this rant that he did about Top Gun being like really gay.
02:27:48.000And he did it in some movie, but apparently it's stolen straight up from Roger Avery.
02:28:34.000And then maybe Quentin just ran, but I know people have done that before.
02:28:37.000Doug Stanhope has had a problem with that, where he has guys opening with him, and he'll be on the road, they'll go to a diner, Doug will be riffing about something and they will do it on stage the next day because they don't think it's a bit.
02:28:49.000It's like they're getting in under the wire.
02:28:52.000Tarantiner and screenwriter Roger Avery, which whom he penned Paul Fisher.
02:30:39.000In comedy, if we're all hanging out in the back and you say something funny and then a week goes by and some guy goes up and does the same thing that you said, you're fucked.
02:30:47.000Comedy's way easier to do that with than, say, cheating with steroids.
02:32:10.000Because, you know, Quentin Tarantino has been accused before of using the plot lines from a bunch of real classic Japanese movies for his films.
02:35:20.000Yeah, but it's, um, that Beowulf movie was fun, because it was, like, animated, but, like, they used people's faces, so it was, like, kind of close, but you knew it wasn't real.
02:42:06.000Or you will be able to clench to stop gas from passing through your anus, to hold your waist until you reach a toilet, and even to eliminate waste more efficiently.
02:45:36.000Dude, just stick your asshole up in the air when you get on the highway.
02:45:41.000When you come over the crest of the 405 and you get that big long hill, just pull your pants down, lift your ass in the air, and just...
02:45:51.000No, son, I'm taking Topanga Canyon so no one sees me shit that slingshot out.
02:45:55.000Callan has a great story about being with a girl once, like many, many moons ago, and he was going on a hike with her and he had a shit, and so he came up with something like, hold on, I'm ready, I hear something, and he made a game out of it that he ran and shit,
02:46:11.000and she thought it was really funny, you know, and she's like, what are you doing?
02:46:15.000He's like, nothing, I heard something.
02:48:29.000Every other mammal, fish, they all do it.
02:48:32.000You know what's crazy is that there's nitrogen around us all the time and a dude figured out how to extract that nitrogen out of the air and use it for fertilizer and that's why there's so many people on the earth today.
02:48:45.000There's a guy named Fritz Haber and he made something called the Haber method of extracting nitrogen.
02:48:49.000He did it like in World War I. He's a genius.
02:48:52.000He also created Zyklon A, which is the shit that they use.
02:48:56.000Agent A? No, the stuff that they gassed the Jews with.
02:49:17.000And he was Jewish, which is even more fucked up.
02:49:20.000So he was there during World War I. And then when World War II was happening, that's when he had to leave Germany and wound up dying and having a heart attack.
02:49:43.000He also was wanted for crimes against humanity because he was gassing the British and Canadian, I think it was, troops when they first started.
02:49:54.000He was the first guy that initiated a gas attack.
02:49:59.000So this guy that's responsible, the nitrogen from the Haber method is responsible for some insane percentage of the nitrogen that's in people's bodies that comes from food.
02:50:10.000Like they think it's something around like half.
02:50:13.000Like half of the nitrogen that you have in your body from food was a direct result of them extracting it out of the air with the Haber method.
02:50:35.000His wife apparently shot herself in front of him because she disagreed with who knows what the whole thing was, but what he was doing and he was off to war and all this thing.
02:51:16.000This one brilliant guy that figured out a way to extract nitrogen became this fucking creator of a monster.
02:51:24.000Yeah, but also the reason why, I mean, maybe somebody would have figured it out eventually, but he's the reason why they were able to do that during World War I. Don't you think someone would have eventually came along and figured it out?
02:51:50.000Almost inventions, like we were talking about that chip that sort of rewires your DNA. There's always these inventions that open up the possibility of other inventions.
02:51:58.000And then the technology that allows for an invention like that gets analyzed by a bunch of different people.
02:52:04.000It's always one of those things where...
02:52:07.000Anytime something happens today, there's a network.
02:52:10.000It's very rare that one person figures one thing out that nobody ever saw before.
02:52:14.000It's like there's a network of inventions and innovations at all sides.
02:52:18.000Yeah, because you need machines and computers and all these different things that other people have created that allow you to do the calculations to invent something new.
03:00:49.000I mean, you're talking about WNBA compared to NBA. I just think he's very talented, and if Rockhold doesn't take him seriously the same way he didn't take Bisping seriously, he'd get fucked up.
03:01:47.000He's got to make sure that he doesn't fuck up and get clipped again.
03:01:49.000But I want to see what happens, because when a guy like Rockhold, who has a lot to lose but not a lot to gain, fights a guy like Branch, who has the golden opportunity in front of him.
03:02:00.000I mean, if Branch can beat Rockhold, it's just gigantic.
03:02:16.000He's really never fought anybody like Rockhold other than Rumble in the World Series.
03:02:19.000But also, with Branch, it's like, are you gonna take the fucking governor off and go after it?
03:02:25.000Because his last fight, maybe it's just a dance partner.
03:02:27.000Even the World Series fight, he's not murking, guys.
03:02:30.000So it's like, in the UFC, he's never been that guy everyone was afraid of.
03:02:34.000Luke Rockhold will take the governor off and kick you in the fucking face.
03:02:37.000It's a very interesting fight because it's supposed to be, if you looked at it on paper, it would be more of a showcase fight for Rockhold.
03:03:17.000He doesn't find a grip, so everyone's like, all right, let's see it.
03:03:19.000Not only that, everybody remembers Bisping clipping him, knocking him out, and then talking mad shit to him inside the cage after he knocked him out.
03:03:27.000Is this fight tonight or Saturday night?
03:04:55.000Tickets for the first show just went on sale today for New Year's Eve.
03:05:00.000Tickets for the second show, the 10 o'clock show, I think they're sold out.
03:05:05.000At the Wiltern in Los Angeles, me and the great and powerful Ian Edwards, who's, in my opinion, one of the funniest fucking comedians working in the world today.