Joe Rogan Experience #1142 - Tony Rock
Episode Stats
Length
2 hours and 8 minutes
Words per Minute
204.89594
Summary
In this episode, the guys talk about the new iPhone and how it has changed the way we live our lives. Also, we talk about our favorite running fanny packs and how they have caught up with us in the modern world. We also talk about how much better it is to run without music and how you can cheat with your music to get the most out of your day. We hope you enjoy this episode and stay tuned for the next one! Stay tuned until the end of the episode for our next episode where we discuss our favorite sports teams and who we would like to see as a mascot in the future of the NFL. Enjoy, sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride with the boys! XOXO, The Guys. -The Guys and the Crew Music: "Goodbye" by Fountains of Wayne Art: Mackenzie Moore Logo by Cody Johnston Theme by Ian Dorsch Music: Hayden Coplen Editor: Will Witwer Thank you for listening to this episode of the podcast and supporting the podcast. Please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts and share it with a friend. Thank you so much! and spread the word to your friends and family about the podcast! Love you guys! -Jonah, Jonah and the crew! Jonah & the crew at The Guys Podcast. Thanks Jonah, the Crew at The Boys and The Crew at Big Jonah and the Podcast Thanks for listening and supporting The Guys at the Podcasts Podcast. Jonah is a big thank you all the Crew. --Jonah & Jonah at the Crews at The Big Dawgs at the Biggest Effin' Crew! -- Thank you Jonah's Backyard -- Jonah At The Biggest Podcasts at the Top of the World Jonahs and Jonah s Backyard at the Backyard? Tony Rock at the Chateau at The Backyard Boys at The Pizzeria & The Back Yard at The Chaterers at The Bodega and The Backwater House at The Cuff and The Poddy House at the Poddy Plant at The White House And The Backroom Boys at the Bayside Farm & The Pescadio at The Stucco House and the Backhouse at The Oldest Place at The Park at The Grove ,
Transcript
00:00:14.000
Yeah, and I rock it with the shades on, so I'm driving with windows open and girls are looking like, who's that guy?
00:00:25.000
What kind of people am I? Well, the people that think about it.
00:00:31.000
Everybody's like, I need an iPhone, I need an iPhone.
00:00:51.000
I think they're both, look, it's no denying iPhones are badass, but it's no denying those are basically just as badass.
00:01:02.000
Yeah, it used to be like if you had a Blackberry and somebody else had an iPhone, you felt like a loser.
00:01:06.000
You felt like a loser with your stupid buttons.
00:01:08.000
Oh, back when people had the phones that you could just zap your number.
00:01:11.000
And you didn't have one, you were just ass out.
00:01:14.000
Everybody had like a little laptop they pulled out.
00:01:27.000
That was the original drug dealer car right there.
00:01:34.000
Tony Rock, I'm so happy that you agreed that the fanny pack is back.
00:01:51.000
Listen, boys, you don't have to be trying to get laid all the time.
00:01:56.000
You just want the convenience of having that bag right there.
00:02:35.000
You slip your phone in there, get your little headsets on.
00:02:45.000
I used to say that if you ran, running, especially running hills, is difficult.
00:03:00.000
You're supposed to hear a little something to get you going.
00:03:11.000
The thing about running in the mountains is like, what if someone's screaming for help?
00:03:14.000
And, you know, you're running by, it's the Eye of the Tigers!
00:03:18.000
If they're already in the mountains and they need help, there's nothing you can do already.
00:03:25.000
You know, what if you're just running up the canyon?
00:03:30.000
They need you to help them take an Instagram picture.
00:03:34.000
Half of the people there are just like, I want to get a good shot.
00:03:37.000
How many people hike just to get a good shot at the top?
00:03:49.000
If you're a girl with a nice body, a bunch of likes, seems to translate into hosting parties for some reason.
00:03:59.000
Yeah, you go to a club and it's hosted tonight by...
00:04:07.000
She doesn't display a talent, but you also don't even hear her talk.
00:04:12.000
You just see the pictures, but just that enough...
00:04:17.000
It takes less and less and less and less to be a celebrity these days.
00:04:27.000
One of the weirder ones is getting down to just being famous for photographs.
00:04:41.000
So why would I be upset ever at someone who's making something that I like to look at?
00:04:50.000
That people would be like, fuck these Instagram hoes, they're big asses.
00:04:58.000
Those are the guys that they're not fucking that are saying that.
00:05:09.000
And Instagram's just such a fascinating thing that people can...
00:05:17.000
Hey, this is me at the grocery store with my dog.
00:05:18.000
And make their world look way more interesting than it really is.
00:05:24.000
Make it look like they're really vacationing all the time and they have all these clothes and they go to the best parties and you meet them and they live in Studio City with four roommates in a studio apartment.
00:05:38.000
Yeah, we all want everybody to think that we're doing better than we are, right?
00:05:45.000
Because if people think you're doing better, then it makes you feel better because they treat you like you're doing.
00:05:50.000
They treat you like you're at the level that you're fictitiously portraying.
00:05:57.000
So you get better treatment based on a life you don't really live.
00:06:01.000
So if you become insta-famous, what do you get out of that?
00:06:13.000
Dude, Kyle Dunnigan blew up because of those little videos that he puts up on his...
00:06:20.000
Kyle does face swaps with Kim Kardashian and Donald Trump.
00:06:28.000
Please go back to the one where Bruce is telling them he's pregnant.
00:06:45.000
Kyle Donegan's Instagram page is the funniest page on the internet.
00:06:52.000
Well, I've seen a few, but then they kind of just fizzle out.
00:06:56.000
Show them the one with Kim Kardashian and the washing machine.
00:07:54.000
Now program R2-D2. He'll save you from outer space.
00:08:23.000
There's nothing like a regular person on his page.
00:08:52.000
But more importantly, this is like a new thing.
00:08:56.000
Like, use his mouth and use other people's faces for the first time.
00:09:01.000
Like, when has anybody ever been able to do that without some great giant studio behind you?
00:09:05.000
The fact that he can do all this shit on his phone...
00:09:10.000
I know you can do it, but I'm saying that now it opens up this whole new kind of comedy.
00:09:16.000
I mean, we know he's not those people, but he's doing those people.
00:09:47.000
You know, the internet is so interesting in that way.
00:09:49.000
Just some new thing opens up and some comic goes, oh, look at this.
00:09:54.000
MySpace was that, Twitter was that, Facebook was that.
00:10:01.000
Hey diddle diddle, the cat in the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon.
00:10:07.000
It took NASA astronauts going 17,000 miles an hour a week to get to the moon.
00:10:15.000
A cow couldn't jump over one of you stupid idiots during nappy time, okay?
00:10:32.000
And it's the face swap thing makes it a hundred times better.
00:10:36.000
Like, that shit would be funny on its own, but with him doing that face swap, it's just a different thing.
00:10:43.000
Yeah, you're following him right now, live on the podcast, ladies and gentlemen.
00:10:51.000
Tony Rock, I think you are one of the comics in this world that does not get the credit that you deserve.
00:11:03.000
I watched you do a set, I guess it was last month.
00:11:22.000
That was a thing like a couple guys after your set were like, woo!
00:11:26.000
That was some heavy hitters on that one that night.
00:11:35.000
Tripoli throws some amazing shows at the store.
00:11:40.000
Every time I see Trip, I'm like, hey, you know we're linked forever, man.
00:12:04.000
Joey Diaz I will always love because Joey Diaz shot the movie...
00:12:11.000
And he says, he sees me at the comedy store, hey man, day one.
00:12:16.000
I'm like, why the fuck is your brother not in this movie?
00:12:22.000
And I'm like, Joey Diaz, I will love you forever, man.
00:12:34.000
Whenever I'm around him, sometimes we get too high and I just don't want to get him mad about anything.
00:12:40.000
You could mention the wrong band or the wrong food or the wrong clothes.
00:12:48.000
You gotta know days when he's actually dangerous.
00:12:57.000
Joey's down, I think, I've got to say more than 50 pounds.
00:13:06.000
And he's going to jiu-jitsu on a regular basis.
00:13:16.000
And I didn't want to make it seem like it was so shocking.
00:13:31.000
He had a kid a few years back, and that started the shift.
00:13:36.000
He's also just been more aware, you know, as you get older.
00:13:39.000
Like, you really do have to take care of your body, or it's gonna fail.
00:13:44.000
You know, it's just like, you're hedging your bets.
00:13:56.000
Obviously, a lot of excess weight is a giant warning sign.
00:14:05.000
Dude, as you get older too, that don't sleep and shit just does not fly.
00:14:17.000
I will give you a cold and then you'll have to lie down, you fuck.
00:14:26.000
Like the moment someone figures out something that you could do where you don't ever need sleep, we're going to have a weird world.
00:14:38.000
I mean, if they have pills that make you go to sleep.
00:14:45.000
They just figure out, oh well this just counteracts all the biochemical responses that your brain creates when it needs sleep.
00:14:52.000
In the meantime, we've actually found through independent studies that it improves your recovery.
00:15:00.000
Chris Ryan just posted some shit yesterday that I retweeted about how doctors and scientists were encouraging women to breastfeed And they were going to do it nationally, but it got side swiped by the formula industry.
00:15:19.000
I believe that 100% because there's always the other side where we're going to not make money if this thing gets through.
00:15:36.000
You're making a decision for profit over baby's nutrition.
00:15:44.000
Yeah, but at least big tobacco isn't targeting babies.
00:15:53.000
How many people have died from fucking cigarettes?
00:15:55.000
Imagine if that was from something else, from any other product, like Diet Coke.
00:16:00.000
We have Diet Coke just killing people left and right.
00:16:07.000
It's not killing people like cigarettes, but...
00:16:11.000
But as far as anyone ever get, like, cigaretted out from Diet Cokes...
00:16:14.000
Yeah, nobody's doing commercials with the thing and the next thing I drank too much Diet Coke, but...
00:16:23.000
All the different things and all that caffeine, if you drank them, nothing but Diet Cokes all day, like 15, 20 a day.
00:16:27.000
Didn't you see, it was like a YouTube video where they put stuff in Coca-Cola and left it for days and how the Coke just destroys it.
00:16:34.000
They put like a brick in a Coca-Cola and it just dissolves the brick.
00:16:42.000
Yeah, I used to drink Mountain Dew like it was no tomorrow.
00:16:45.000
If you got a fat, juicy cheeseburger and a Dr. Pepper, a cold Dr. Pepper on ice, oh my goodness.
00:16:53.000
Why is it that things that taste good are so bad for you?
00:17:09.000
How much will you indulge that part of your brain?
00:17:11.000
How much will you let that part of your brain ruin your life?
00:17:18.000
But goddamn, man, if you're in front of an ice cream sundae, and you're just looking at that thing, you're like, aww.
00:17:23.000
That's the saying right there, self-discipline, but goddamn.
00:17:29.000
If it's in front of me, eight times out of town, I just go, fuck it.
00:17:34.000
We're talking food or just bad stuff in general?
00:17:40.000
If I'm holding strong on my diet and someone pushes some lasagna in front of me, I'm like, oh my god, look at that.
00:17:45.000
Yeah, I try to do no dairy until I get off a plane in New York City, and I'm like, there's no way I'm not having a whole pizza from Fulton Street.
00:17:54.000
Do you count pizza as dairy because of the dough?
00:17:59.000
Yeah, dairy's a weird one of the people, right?
00:18:02.000
They say that if you eat that raw cheese, that your body has a much easier time digesting it.
00:18:11.000
The cheese that's made with raw milk as opposed to cheese that's made with homogenized and pasteurized milk.
00:18:16.000
I had this friend who was a surgeon from France.
00:18:24.000
He had to smuggle cheese over from Europe to America and they were terrified they were going to get caught.
00:18:34.000
Because they want you to have the bad stuff here.
00:18:41.000
Because what they're trying to do is prevent diseases.
00:18:45.000
They want milk to be able to stay on the shelf.
00:18:47.000
All of our surplus and all this stuff that we have in terms of grain and food, if we didn't have it and something went wrong, it would be kind of sketchy.
00:18:56.000
And that's what happened somewhere around World War II. That's why we created all this stuff in the first place.
00:19:00.000
That's where things started getting really weird in terms of stacking things up and surpluses.
00:19:06.000
But milk can't stay raw on a shelf very long, man.
00:19:11.000
Because things get transported, and if it's milk, it's got to be local, it's got to be pretty fresh.
00:19:17.000
But damn, if you can get it, if you can get it from a real good Whole Foods market or one of those sprouts sometimes has raw milk, it tastes better.
00:19:26.000
Well, Whole Foods now has stuff that's just as normal as Ralph's.
00:19:31.000
It's like Whole Foods, the myth has been exposed.
00:19:36.000
Well, the other places like Ralph's and Vaughn's, they're becoming more diverse with their food choices.
00:19:43.000
Right, they're trying to compete with whole foods.
00:19:44.000
They're putting grass-fed meat in there and stuff like that, and organic vegetables.
00:20:02.000
I tried quinoa for the first time a couple of months ago.
00:20:18.000
So much nutrients just getting jolted into your system.
00:20:23.000
Use kale, a giant thumb-sized chunk of ginger, four garlic cloves, a pear, and celery.
00:20:37.000
Dude, when you're drinking this stuff, your whole body's going, what in the fuck is all this?
00:20:45.000
You don't even have to chew it to absorb it, right?
00:20:47.000
It's just going right in there and getting broken down.
00:20:51.000
But then, you better be closed to a bathroom, son.
00:20:55.000
Yeah, we feel great, but how does the toilet feel?
00:21:15.000
It's essentially an aspect of coconut oil that they extract.
00:21:22.000
A lot of people put it in coffee and stuff and different things, but it's a good dietary aid.
00:21:28.000
But you have to put it in there because apparently...
00:21:30.000
At least as it's been explained to me, the nutrients absorb in the body better if there's fat mixed in with them.
00:21:37.000
So that healthy MCT oil or coconut oil, when you put all that stuff in there, then it allows your body to process those nutrients better.
00:21:55.000
That seems to be the difference between making it to the bathroom, And having a dreadful result.
00:22:07.000
You know, I have the vegan friends and I have the friends that, you know, like to cook and eat and the foodies, so I'm trying to walk the fine line.
00:22:20.000
I try to get some soup and some chips or whatever for the room, but at 10 at night, it shows up at midnight.
00:22:29.000
I hang around and take pictures with the people, and now it's 1 o'clock, and I'm starving, and there's nothing open that I can get a healthy meal from.
00:22:37.000
Yeah, I always bring protein bars everywhere I go.
00:22:44.000
Yeah, it's like it's an easy thing like if you just use it just try to get some nutrition Just to fill your stomach.
00:22:53.000
Almonds are great because just a couple handfuls of- Well, I'm allergic to almonds.
00:23:00.000
I'm allergic to almonds, pecans, I believe walnuts, but not peanuts because peanuts is not a nut.
00:23:10.000
So something weird there where- Whoa, peanuts grow on the ground.
00:23:21.000
All my life, I've never thought about a peanut tree.
00:23:23.000
Like, what the fuck does a peanut tree look like?
00:23:26.000
Even though Jimmy Carter, I remember, was a peanut farmer in Georgia.
00:23:39.000
But I never knew what a fucking peanut looked like, like in the ground.
00:23:44.000
But even, I never even, like, I could see an orange, if you said, picture an orange tree, I could see it.
00:23:54.000
Meanwhile, I've had way more peanuts than I've had oranges.
00:24:09.000
Yeah, it kind of grows like that on top of the ground right there.
00:24:15.000
I remember picking them with my grandmother back in South Carolina back in the day.
00:24:20.000
Some food, some of these plants are incredibly nutritious to your body, and some of these plants will kill the fuck out of you instantly.
00:24:42.000
How about those assholes that still decide to make sushi out of it?
00:24:45.000
If you cut it an inch to the left or an inch to the right, you're dead.
00:24:55.000
You got those chopsticks and you're bringing it up to your lips.
00:25:01.000
He doesn't want to say anything because he wants to keep his job.
00:25:17.000
Those crazy people that jump, like my friend Andy Stumpf.
00:25:19.000
They jump off cliffs and shit with those wingsuits.
00:25:30.000
And it was like, if he misses, he's dead instantly.
00:25:38.000
Going like 100 plus miles an hour, hit this bridge.
00:25:51.000
Will Smith, he posted a video on his Instagram, another guy that has a great Instagram, posted a video about how fear, no, amazing things are right on the other side of fear.
00:26:02.000
So he's been doing this thing where he's just conquering all his fears and he has a group of guys that are professional bungee jumpers.
00:26:08.000
They're bungee jumping on his birthday, his 50th birthday, out of a helicopter over the Grand Canyon.
00:26:25.000
We did a bunch of that kind of shit on Fear Factor, man.
00:26:31.000
In the last season, we did a couple of them that really had me freaked out, but one of them They hook people up to these bungee cords.
00:26:39.000
And they had them tied to like a post or something?
00:26:52.000
And as soon as you released them, they shot through the air.
00:26:55.000
Because there was a helicopter holding onto a bungee cord behind them.
00:26:59.000
And then they were just dangling over this canyon.
00:27:07.000
And I watched it and I was like, yeah, I mean, they know what they're doing.
00:27:14.000
But I was like, I would not want to be that person attached to that bungee cord.
00:27:18.000
Who was the person that came up with these things?
00:27:23.000
Like, every time I'm like, how did you know you could eat that?
00:27:29.000
No, they would do toxicology examinations on certain bugs.
00:27:32.000
They'd grind them up and find out what's bad for you, what's not.
00:27:39.000
A lot of those people that ate food, man, that they shouldn't have had to eat.
00:27:54.000
And they would have to do these really fucking difficult eating challenges.
00:28:01.000
If they did it, they'd win a certain amount of money.
00:28:03.000
I would always give them whatever I had in my pocket, too.
00:28:06.000
They won't eat anything other than a peanut butter and jelly sandwich now.
00:28:24.000
What scares me is the bungee cords under the helicopters type shit.
00:28:29.000
How do you know that that's gonna work out right every time?
00:28:32.000
I'd take the bungee cord over the helicopter before bull nuts and all that stuff.
00:28:51.000
I've seen one of those cooking shows, and they fry them hard.
00:28:54.000
They look like fried pork rinds, and people are just going to town.
00:29:05.000
I'd seen sautéed, and I'd seen where they breaded them.
00:29:23.000
Now imagine the person who tells you that's cauliflower, you eat it, or they say it's calamari, you eat it, and then your friend's like, nah, I'm kidding, it was bull nuts.
00:29:30.000
See, it really bothers you that it's bull nuts.
00:29:34.000
I think if you're gonna eat the whole animal, you might as well eat his balls, too.
00:29:41.000
I mean, you know, the whole thing about castrating them is strange too.
00:29:47.000
They only castrate them because they want them to be, that's how you get a steer, right?
00:30:10.000
So, like, they must do that with grass-fed beef, too, right?
00:30:34.000
And that keeps the meat tender or something like that?
00:30:37.000
Now, who's the person that came up with that one?
00:30:42.000
We just put it in a dark box for years and then the meat will be...
00:30:47.000
Well, here's the thing that I found from eating wild meat specifically, and I know that everybody can't eat wild meat.
00:31:00.000
They're out there in the woods with predators, and they're surviving for years in the mountains.
00:31:07.000
There's mountain lions out there and bears out there, and these fucking things have figured out a way to get away from them and survive.
00:31:16.000
And if you eat one of those, it's just a different thing than eating these prisoners, you know?
00:31:24.000
That's bad too, to be out in the wild living your life, you're an elk, and then a human walks into this forum that doesn't belong, he's the outsider, and blows your fucking head off.
00:31:36.000
True, unless you like to eat elk, then it's awesome.
00:31:42.000
We could decide all day whose land is whose land.
00:31:49.000
They will walk right through your fucking living room and stomp your kid to death, okay?
00:31:55.000
I don't think an elk was coming to my living room.
00:31:57.000
But if they wanted to, they're not respecting our property because they love us.
00:32:10.000
If you find a moose in your backyard, get the fuck back in your house.
00:32:45.000
There's a lot of moose in certain parts of Canada.
00:32:53.000
You can't believe how big they are when you see them.
00:33:41.000
No, no, I'd rather keep this little baby cow hostage all hog-tied.
00:33:49.000
That's one of the more horrible things about farming, right?
00:33:51.000
I guess they have free-range veal, too, which is basically just a calf.
00:34:06.000
Because free-range chickens, they don't get anywhere.
00:34:07.000
If you have a chicken house, and you have a yard, you don't ever have to fence the chickens in.
00:34:12.000
The only reason why you fence the chickens in is protecting them from other things.
00:34:19.000
At the end of the day, they just go in their little chicken coop and climb up into their seats.
00:34:30.000
So when I come around, they get excited and they follow me around.
00:34:39.000
Yeah, they're free-range in the sense that I let them out all the time.
00:34:41.000
But the thing about it is they're not going to go to another state.
00:34:48.000
They hang around where they're going to be fed at because they're wild animals.
00:34:54.000
This guy comes out and throws grain on the ground twice a day, so we're gonna stay here.
00:34:59.000
When you let them out, they go looking for bugs.
00:35:12.000
Jamie, I think we need to play an off-played clip for Mr. Rock.
00:35:27.000
There's a fantastic video of a cat playing with a mouse, and a chicken comes over and shows them how the fuck it's done.
00:35:33.000
So here's one where they're going to put a mouse, and this chicken's going to grab it from this dude.
00:35:53.000
We had a mouse get into the chicken coop once, just randomly.
00:36:01.000
The cat's thinking about getting the mouse, and the chicken's like, bitch, give me that.
00:36:28.000
So they just go around my yard, jacking everything that moves.
00:36:56.000
I used to have a gardener that he kept roosters, like fighting roosters.
00:37:02.000
And he lived in this super Mexican neighborhood where everything was in Spanish.
00:37:15.000
But it was just super Mexican, to the point where everybody in his little area had boxes of chicken coops in the backyard, just stacked.
00:37:26.000
Dude, I mean, like five houses on this one block.
00:37:34.000
So, like, people fight dogs and everybody's, what the fuck?
00:37:43.000
We make a distinction between chickens and dogs.
00:37:47.000
Because we eat chickens and because you never really form a bond with a chicken.
00:38:19.000
No, you just make the noise and they know when they hear that noise.
00:38:26.000
We shake this box of dried mealworms and as soon as they hear that they come running.
00:38:41.000
So when someone's forcing dogs to kill each other, that's like forcing a family member that can't read to fight to the death.
00:38:47.000
It's like making two of your friends fight to the death.
00:38:49.000
Yeah, like if you have a family member who can't read and you trick them into fighting to the death.
00:38:54.000
Tell him you'll love him the most if he does it.
00:38:56.000
Hey, dude, if you fight to death, I will love you the most.
00:39:13.000
I don't want anybody to get upset and say I said anything about fighting dogs.
00:39:21.000
You know, like sometimes you say some shit where you're just exploring it.
00:39:25.000
How come it's okay with chickens and it's not okay with dogs?
00:39:31.000
The only reasonable way to do that was to say it's fucked up with chickens, too.
00:39:37.000
But people would always misinterpret it and go with the worst way is to say, what's wrong with fighting dogs?
00:39:44.000
But you were really saying, why should you be able to fight chickens?
00:39:51.000
Shouldn't they get the nod because they're delicious?
00:39:59.000
And this lady who was there, she and I were having a conversation.
00:40:08.000
She goes, well, it's unfortunate, but we have to use it because the ants have been getting to the garbage.
00:40:21.000
That's one thing about Buddhists, like a lot of Buddhists, they don't take themselves too seriously to the point where they can't crack out a little joke about...
00:40:30.000
The hypocrisy of the fact they're using bug spray in an ashram.
00:40:40.000
Whereas if her backyard was invaded by house cats, she just went out and shotgunned them.
00:40:46.000
You can't do that, but you can spray the fuck out of these little bugs.
00:40:50.000
It's like when things are little, we're like, I can't be bothered worrying about you.
00:40:59.000
Yeah, you would think that they would figure out a better way to keep those ants out.
00:41:12.000
Well, don't you think there could have been a way to clean them up with water and not kill them?
00:41:24.000
But even then, you're murdering dozens and dozens of ants.
00:41:27.000
If you just had a broom and you started hitting those ants, you're going to fuck up a few.
00:41:31.000
Or how about you get an anteater if you're a Buddhist?
00:41:42.000
Then you got chicken shit all over your kitchen.
00:41:50.000
Yeah, they should have chickens outside the ashram.
00:41:57.000
I wonder if they try to make their chickens vegetarian.
00:42:00.000
If you have an infestation, use your vacuum to quickly get rid of the invaders, then immediately empty the vacuum bag in the outdoor compost pile or at some distance from your house.
00:42:09.000
Do not use ant bait or poison, like sprays like Raid.
00:42:13.000
That continue in the toxic waste stream from their point of manufacture to their ultimate destination in landfills via runoff or sewage.
00:42:23.000
So they're saying, don't use bug spray, just use a vacuum cleaner.
00:42:31.000
You're sucking those little tiny things into a huge metal tube.
00:42:39.000
Can you imagine if somebody, like, assumed that you would be okay, and they used something of proportionate size to suck you off the earth?
00:42:49.000
You land on a pile of other people going 180 miles an hour.
00:42:52.000
Or you and another person get sucked up at the same time, and you just smash into each other, your broken arms and shoulders.
00:42:58.000
What would you do if there wasn't a vacuum cleaner, Mr. Buddhist Answer Man?
00:43:18.000
But I think ant-eaters just like to get to a mound of dirt and just go to town.
00:43:23.000
They stick their tongues in the ant hole, right?
00:43:26.000
Tongues are like sticky, so it's just like they're just eating for days.
00:43:30.000
But what if they wiped them out real quick and then you got a fucking ant-eater that you have to feed, then you got to bring in ants, and you're like, what kind of an asshole am I? What eats an ant-eater?
00:43:46.000
Dude, there is a crazy video that I tweeted of these tourists walking through the woods and they're walking down a trail and they run into a fucking gigantic grizzly bear.
00:44:11.000
Did you see the video of the poachers that went to kill the rhino and the lion killed them?
00:44:18.000
Yeah, I didn't know if they got a video, but yeah, that's fucked up.
00:44:59.000
That thing is coming way too close to him, man.
00:45:13.000
The scary thing about that is that bear could have just decided randomly through some firing of his bear synapses to take a left instead of a right.
00:45:33.000
You know it's real, but you don't believe in it.
00:45:39.000
If you were outside and you saw that, if you were with those people in Australia, you'd be like, oh, Jesus Christ, this is real.
00:45:47.000
Well, no, if I was there, I would know that that's the reality.
00:45:50.000
Like, my world doesn't involve being somewhere near that close to a bear.
00:45:58.000
I'd be like, holy shit, this can't be happening.
00:46:00.000
But if you were with those people, if you went on that trip with them...
00:46:03.000
That would be one of the craziest things you could ever do.
00:46:07.000
Your whole existence gets down to the chance that this thing makes a decision to go one way or another.
00:46:15.000
Otherwise, it's just going to run you down and tear you apart.
00:46:17.000
If you go in certain scenarios, you're like, wait, this shit can get real fast.
00:46:31.000
Like how many people died in Chicago last week?
00:46:35.000
There was the reporting on the lack of attention that the murders in Chicago were getting in like the national news and how crazy it is.
00:46:46.000
The one thing that sticks out to me every time I go there is how segregated it is.
00:46:52.000
For a major city like New York is like we're all right piled up together.
00:47:22.000
There is a war going on in Chicago that's way more deadly than most of the wars we're engaging in overseas.
00:47:29.000
You don't hear about that many soldiers dying every day.
00:47:32.000
Now, that's another scenario, how we said, like, that's real.
00:47:38.000
You walk outside in Chicago, that is a real fear that you should have.
00:47:42.000
The number of people in Chicago this year passes 1,400!
00:47:49.000
Now, how many people do we know how many people got shot, like, doing tours of Afghanistan?
00:48:03.000
So let's Google how many soldiers were shot overseas this year.
00:48:09.000
You know, that's a weird thing, man, that we got a war going on.
00:48:12.000
If that was Mexicans invading North Dakota and shooting people and that many people were dying every day, we would be taking action.
00:48:22.000
If it was 1,400 and a hundred of them were white people, it would be an issue.
00:48:27.000
If it was 1,300 black people and 100 white people, it'd be...
00:48:33.000
I mean, it's something that people don't talk about.
00:48:41.000
It's a terrible situation, like culturally, to have something like this as a glaring point.
00:48:47.000
And with 1,400 people being shot, that means, and people don't want to realize this, is, you know, post-traumatic stress disorder is a real thing in the ghetto as well as in...
00:49:02.000
So when you see something, when people are like, why do these guys have guns on them?
00:49:12.000
It's, you know, we're not protecting those people.
00:49:16.000
If they were stuck somewhere overseas in the middle of some war, and they were American citizens, they'd be like, please help get us out of here.
00:49:25.000
If there was a place that had statistically the numbers of the south side of Chicago where all the murders going down, if there was a place statistically in another part of the world, we would be saying...
00:49:35.000
Put those numbers anywhere else, and it's a crisis.
00:49:40.000
Let's say if we had just moved into Hawaii, just took over Hawaii, and then we were in an area where people started getting shot and killed by locals like that.
00:49:49.000
We would want to extract those people from Hawaii.
00:49:54.000
We would think they'd be shooting at the helicopters as we rescue them.
00:49:57.000
Well, you just look at the real numbers, just the raw numbers.
00:49:59.000
That's a crazy number of people getting shot in a year.
00:50:11.000
It's only like 1,500 total since like 2001. Since 2001, man!
00:50:23.000
You're saying in comparison to the other number, since January.
00:50:30.000
And that's happening right here in the good old U.S. of A. in one of the biggest cities in the world.
00:50:36.000
And it's happening in other cities also that people don't know about.
00:50:40.000
I don't travel around there, so I don't know what happened or why it happened, why they have this segregation there and what it was all about.
00:50:53.000
Then there's downtown where it's nice and everybody's, you know...
00:51:07.000
If you were the king, or the president, Tony Rock- If I was the president?
00:51:23.000
If you're getting a better education, then you just avoid the pitfalls naturally because you just know that certain things are wrong.
00:51:32.000
And by getting a better education, you have opportunities to do.
00:51:45.000
There's no type of any type of extracurricular activities for these kids.
00:51:50.000
In Chicago, there's gang life, which you are born into, which you are expected to go into once you are a certain age.
00:52:02.000
It's like my father's been this way, my grandfather's been this way, my uncles are this way, my big brothers are this way.
00:52:11.000
And it's a war zone where you sleep and your family lives.
00:52:14.000
Not just a war zone with soldiers, but a war zone with families.
00:52:17.000
And another thing, better education, you're more worldly.
00:52:21.000
If you see the world, you realize how small your neighborhood is and there's a bigger world out there and you want to go places and see things, then you realize, like, what are we doing here?
00:52:30.000
But these are people that I guarantee probably never left Chicago.
00:52:35.000
Probably never went on vacation to the South to visit grandparents and realized, damn, the South is nice and quiet and the people are friendly and they've never been to, you know...
00:52:47.000
The zoo and saw an animal and went home and Googled the mating rituals of this.
00:52:56.000
The stuff that you're involved in becomes just so small.
00:53:01.000
This guy, I don't like this guy because he has one red and I have one blue.
00:53:06.000
That tiny little area, you know, that he operates in with his living his life.
00:53:22.000
One of the wildest neighborhoods when I was growing up there.
00:53:26.000
My vision was, yeah, this is going on outside, but I'm going to be there one day.
00:53:30.000
What do you attribute having the ability to do that to?
00:53:37.000
My father worked two full-time jobs my whole childhood.
00:53:44.000
So just to see him go every day, like, damn, this dude works hard, man.
00:53:54.000
Education was, you know, she made an emphasis on it.
00:53:58.000
You know, it was like my friends, one of my best friends down the block, no dad.
00:54:11.000
Everything started just, the neighborhood started just to, you know.
00:54:17.000
Crack was people that are alive today, or young kids today, they don't remember the 80s.
00:54:34.000
People who were doing fine, and then all of a sudden...
00:55:04.000
Looked maybe, you know, a thousand feet away and looked back to like, just, you know, look around the neighborhood and saw a guy just run up.
00:55:13.000
He looked like, if you ever see an old Big Daddy Kane album, he had the flat top and a bunch of jewelry on, on the corner, on the payphone.
00:55:23.000
And the guy ran up on him while he was returning a beep and just tried to rob him.
00:55:36.000
And I went home and my parents were there and I was like, this is crazy, man.
00:55:51.000
You're very fortunate to have those kind of examples of your dad who worked like that and your mom.
00:56:00.000
It's hard for some people if they didn't get the break that you got in that regard.
00:56:20.000
Like how someone who can work two full-time jobs.
00:56:31.000
My dad's rule was everybody had to have a job at 14. So 13 was your last summer.
00:56:45.000
Yeah, you know, those guys, the thing is, man, that's a bitter pill to swallow when you're young, but damn, the dudes who go through that always seem like they have an extra gear.
00:56:57.000
I know a lot of dudes who went through boot camp-type dads, and they did not like it.
00:57:02.000
But they can do some shit, like just a little bit more shit than other people can do.
00:57:07.000
They might not like the fact that their dad was always telling them what to do, but these motherfuckers can hike 20 miles and not complain.
00:57:12.000
My dad wasn't boot camp, but it was like, you're gonna work.
00:57:17.000
And then I have so many siblings that what his rule was, we all had to take care of each other.
00:57:21.000
So my oldest brother, of course, he turns 14 first.
00:57:49.000
If your brother's in a fight, you're in a fight.
00:57:51.000
So then it became don't fuck with the Rock brothers because there's so many of them you have to fight all of them.
00:57:56.000
So that kind of kept us safe during this whole, you know...
00:58:03.000
It's a bad situation to be in, but a great place to develop character.
00:58:08.000
There's a lot of opportunities to develop character there.
00:58:12.000
You know that you develop a sense of go and get it.
00:58:27.000
We all need to have a little bit more of that in our life and then also a little bit more community, too.
00:58:33.000
And we grew up in a time where it was next door neighbor could spank you.
00:58:38.000
Lady across the street could grab you and make you sit down on the stoop until your mother came home.
00:58:42.000
The guy in the bodega at the corner would tell you to sit inside until your mother came home.
00:58:47.000
Yeah, people would police the neighborhood, police the neighborhood kids.
00:58:51.000
Now we live in, don't talk to my kid, don't touch my kid.
00:59:00.000
I talked about this recently, but my cousin, I saw my cousin get smacked by some lady once when we were both like...
00:59:06.000
My cousin's a year younger than me, so I might have been six and she might have been five, somewhere around there.
00:59:13.000
And this lady cuffed her right in the face, man.
00:59:17.000
This lady fell on the ice, and my cousin just happened to be there, and she was looking at her on the ground, and she did not laugh at her, but the lady said she laughed at her.
00:59:26.000
She was just angry that she fell and hurt herself.
00:59:28.000
She got up and smacked my cousin right in the face.
00:59:32.000
I remember seeing it and realizing I couldn't do anything about it to save her, to help her.
00:59:36.000
I was a little kid, too, and being terrified that this grown-up person just smacked this little kid in the head.
00:59:47.000
It's probably better in the long run with crazy people smacking your kid.
00:59:55.000
She was a crazy lady that lived in our building.
00:59:58.000
That was always the thing about living in apartment buildings, right?
01:00:02.000
Somebody who always died, and you would be walking by that apartment going, what the fuck is that?
01:00:11.000
You ever smell a dead body when somebody died in the house?
01:00:30.000
It took a while, I'm sure, for them to clean it.
01:00:34.000
I just remember there was a terrible, terrible smell in the hallway, and then they realized that this lady had died.
01:00:41.000
So then they go in to get the body, but I don't remember how long it took for them to clean up the smell, but the smell was unbelievably bad.
01:00:48.000
And then somebody moves in and all the neighbors are like, you know, somebody died in there.
01:00:55.000
Don't they have to tell you now, like if someone got murdered in a house?
01:01:19.000
They like to celebrate New Year's Eve, Fourth of July.
01:01:36.000
I don't believe in ghosts, but I don't not believe in ghosts.
01:01:42.000
But, imagine, you're out in the desert, and all of a sudden you see an apparition walk towards you in the desert.
01:01:57.000
And it looks right at you and it looks like a teacher that you knew from like seventh grade or something.
01:02:10.000
My fucking seventh grade teacher just popped up in the middle of the desert.
01:02:20.000
Even if the people you trust, they'd be like, you okay?
01:02:34.000
I'd have to say, well, every time I talk to him, he seems reasonable and intelligent.
01:02:47.000
He pulls out his phone and starts showing me pictures of clouds.
01:03:08.000
Remember when Jack Nicholson was in The Shining?
01:03:36.000
I'm looking at clouds and you think they're spaceships.
01:03:46.000
Maybe he has some They Live glasses that I don't have.
01:03:53.000
And he's looking at those photos and he sees some shit that my puny brain can't see.
01:04:01.000
What if people can see some stuff and we should...
01:04:06.000
I think it's entirely possible that people have senses, that they can detect things and feel things.
01:04:11.000
The real question is how many of those people are being honest about it and how often does it really happen?
01:04:19.000
People love to pretend they have some psychic power or they have some paranormal gift or they're Different and exceptional in some way without earning it from everybody else.
01:04:36.000
I just have a fucking instinct and I always go in my gut.
01:04:42.000
So you've got to wonder, like, how many people really do feel like something's wrong when something's wrong?
01:04:47.000
And how many people really do, like, know not to go to a place, like something is telling them not to go, like something strong, and how many people are just full of shit?
01:04:55.000
And how many people, after the fact, pretend they had a voice that told them not to do it?
01:04:59.000
I don't know about the voice, but I know that that's real.
01:05:04.000
A lot of times, there's been times in my life where I, you know, Just followed the instinct and ended up, you know.
01:05:13.000
I remember one time something happened to my brother Brian.
01:05:16.000
My brother Brian is my favorite brother in the whole world.
01:05:21.000
Brian got, a guy tried to rob Brian in the neighborhood one day.
01:05:23.000
He got in a fight with a guy and the guy cut his face.
01:05:41.000
You know how you transfer in New York on the subway.
01:05:44.000
Jump on the third train and take it a few stops and get off and come up to the street.
01:05:47.000
And I asked the guy walking, hey, man, you know where Kings County Hospital is?
01:06:12.000
I know for a fact that I've been thinking about people and they've called me.
01:06:15.000
I say that's real, but I don't know about, you know, that they live glasses.
01:06:19.000
But I know there's something that happens sometimes when you're thinking about someone and they call you.
01:06:23.000
Because sometimes it happens when this person is like so far out of your memory.
01:06:28.000
Like you haven't talked to them in a year and a half.
01:06:31.000
And you're like, dude, how the fuck did you know?
01:06:41.000
You put a frequency that's so strong in the air that it...
01:06:47.000
Many states passed legislation in the 1980s and early 1990s to protect sellers and real estate brokers from buyers claiming they were damaged by the seller's failure to disclose the presence of ghosts.
01:06:59.000
This is These laws became known as Ghostbuster Laws after the 1980s era movie comedy, Connecticut Ghostbusters Law, first appeared in 1990. Wow.
01:07:22.000
The overhaul also replaced the reference to HIV with a reference to the Commissioner of Public Health's list of reportable diseases.
01:07:41.000
Yeah, I mean, I guess they have to do that, right?
01:07:46.000
I mean, you don't want someone to know that, like, there was a house that I saw in Boulder that was for sale, the house where JonBenet Ramsey was killed, and they couldn't sell it.
01:07:55.000
I think they even changed the name of the street or something crazy like that.
01:07:58.000
And they still couldn't sell it, and it was like a really nice house.
01:08:17.000
Dude, there could be some fucking psycho could move there.
01:08:24.000
The apartment, though, the condo is still there.
01:08:29.000
OJ's house is gone, but the murder scene is still...
01:08:52.000
Your Honor, we're going to go back to reference Ghostbusters Law number one.
01:08:59.000
I would like to call Ray Parker Jr. as a character witness.
01:09:02.000
I don't think in court they ever use those names, right?
01:09:22.000
Have you ever been a place where it felt weird?
01:09:25.000
You ever been in a place where you felt the presence?
01:09:26.000
No, I've been in places that felt weird because, you know, some violence was going to pop off and I knew it.
01:09:31.000
And I was like, let's get the fuck out of here.
01:09:37.000
I was at a concert once and a brawl broke out and I quit.
01:09:40.000
I was a security guard and I was in a Neil Young concert and it broke out and I put a hoodie on, I zipped it up, I covered my security outfit and I walked right the fuck out of there.
01:09:50.000
I was like, get you out of your fucking mind if you think I'm jumping into this fray and getting clocked in the head by somebody.
01:09:56.000
People were fighting and they canceled the show and kicked everybody out.
01:10:03.000
I was at the Vibe Awards when Dr. Dre got jumped and Young Buck stabbed a guy.
01:10:13.000
I was doing a show for UPN. This was back when UPN was still a network.
01:10:18.000
And one of the execs from UPN was there with her young son, who wanted to see all the rappers.
01:10:30.000
And I'm sitting there, and I tell—I forgot the lady's name.
01:10:33.000
I said, hey, you might want to get your kid out of here.
01:10:49.000
And I'm like, you might want to get him out of here.
01:10:51.000
And the second time I said it, like, yo, you might want to really get him out of here.
01:11:01.000
And like two days later on set, she's just like, how did you know that?
01:11:11.000
That's a crazy feeling too when people are about to do something ridiculous.
01:11:20.000
When you grow up in the hood, you have that instinct.
01:11:23.000
You look at a guy walk past you one time and you look around the room and, okay, it's about to go.
01:11:34.000
Yeah, people that have never experienced that probably wouldn't know what to do.
01:11:38.000
They would think nothing of it, like that lady.
01:11:43.000
This was recently, like maybe three months, four months ago.
01:11:51.000
And we're in a club after the show, and there's a couple of guys talking in the corner.
01:11:56.000
She's like, hey, Tony Rock, have a little small talk.
01:12:00.000
And one guy walks over and stands at the end of the bar here, and one guy stands at the end of the bar here, and I turn to my friend Dave, and I go, yo, you ever been in a fight in a bar before?
01:12:17.000
The third guy comes over, and he's like, oh, shit, you are the comedian.
01:12:22.000
I was like, I thought that was the comedian guy.
01:12:25.000
I took a picture with him, and he calls the other guy.
01:12:29.000
It was like he kind of just squashed it because I guess they didn't know who I was.
01:12:33.000
And it was going to go because I said something to the girl.
01:12:40.000
Now I turn into the comedian like, what's up, guys?
01:12:54.000
Yeah, if you ain't never been around violent people, you probably don't smell that vibe, right?
01:13:00.000
That's a valuable tool to have if you're in those places.
01:13:03.000
Especially if you're on the road in cities, you know, by yourself.
01:13:06.000
On the road, you know, maybe you have a local friend who's like, dude, let me take you to my friend's club.
01:13:12.000
And then you're in some place, you're like, how do I get out of here?
01:13:15.000
Or I've been in, hey, my boy's having a party at his house.
01:13:17.000
And I'm like, oh, what the fuck am I doing at his house?
01:13:26.000
The craziest ones are the ones that have to take you in a shuttle.
01:13:48.000
Right down the street is literally right down the street.
01:14:07.000
And I'm trying to get a point of reference if I got to jump out the truck.
01:14:13.000
As far as you can see, right or left of the truck.
01:14:18.000
So there's nothing like if I jump out which way, I don't know.
01:14:20.000
This is how girls have to feel every time they get in a guy's car.
01:14:30.000
They jump out and they run around the other side of the bar like, hey, bro, come around this way.
01:14:37.000
And I say to myself, like, holy shit, this is how it's going to end.
01:14:41.000
And I turn the corner and I see the neon light that says girls, girls, girls.
01:14:46.000
I had never been so excited to see the ugliest strippers in the world.
01:15:00.000
I want all the lap dances because I thought I was going to die five seconds ago.
01:15:04.000
You thought they were taking you to a barn somewhere.
01:15:06.000
You go back behind there, there's chains hanging from the rafters.
01:15:26.000
But it just shows you how brutal people were back then.
01:15:30.000
Like, every day, someone's getting fucked up on that show.
01:15:44.000
Every day, people are getting jacked and murdered and killed.
01:16:02.000
People that don't understand your reality, well, you're not from this world.
01:16:07.000
This is a real thing to us, to know how a fight's going to pop off, to know when a guy's strapped, to know when this is our reality.
01:16:14.000
What's crazy is that we like to think that that doesn't exist anymore, that that Viking style of living doesn't exist.
01:16:26.000
It's basically that same kind of like conqueror, survivor mentality.
01:16:36.000
The guys that run in the jewelry store and smash the glasses.
01:16:44.000
It's just confined to certain areas now and it's not spreading out like the Vikings did in giant boats and getting on the sea.
01:16:50.000
And they're not doing it like the Vikings did it Some aspect of it was just you know Trying to discover new lands.
01:17:03.000
Now they just do it because it's like, I have to eat.
01:17:07.000
Man, I wish I could see what it was really like back then.
01:17:09.000
Because it's like, you watch the show and the show's really cool, but you know they're actors and they're doing a great job and everything, but you still know they're actors.
01:17:17.000
And you're watching them do things and everything's really well done.
01:17:20.000
I mean, it's a really well done show, but still you're like, man, I wish I could see it in real life.
01:17:25.000
To just be where it was happening in real life.
01:17:28.000
Can you imagine just being alive back then when the best clothes were made out of fucking animal hides?
01:17:38.000
Or you killed the buffalo, you ate the village, ate the buffalo, and then you used every piece of it.
01:17:44.000
They would take their boats out and catch fish and bring them in and people would be waiting on the docks to see if they were going to eat tonight.
01:17:52.000
So if a plague hit, half the people would be dead.
01:17:55.000
A woman would have a baby right in front of you.
01:18:20.000
They'd be like, no, no, no, fuck riding a horse, dude.
01:18:31.000
I'm wirelessly charging my phone right there on the fucking...
01:18:35.000
It's like, they would be like, you're an asshole if you want to live like us.
01:18:39.000
And then some guy who doesn't have any of that fucking opens your door with a gun and now he's the Viking.
01:18:46.000
And if you don't take care of that problem, this is the thing.
01:18:52.000
It's like if you were a person and you had a thing that was wrong with you, like a big cancerous legion on your leg and you just ignored it, fuck it, whatever.
01:19:02.000
Yeah, that is exactly what any sort of crime-infested area is.
01:19:07.000
It's a problem that if you don't address, it's not going to get any better.
01:19:12.000
People don't address the problems in society until it affects them.
01:19:16.000
Besides just education, how do you stop as much crime?
01:19:24.000
You can get the guns out of any way if you want to.
01:19:33.000
But do you run the risk of taking guns away from people that could defend themselves in a really dangerous area that's filled with guns?
01:19:46.000
Like, who are you going to take the guns away from?
01:19:48.000
Are you going to take the guns away from the lady who runs the bakery, who carries a lot of cash at the end of the day?
01:19:53.000
No, the lady that runs the bakery keeps her gun.
01:19:55.000
The lady that runs the bakery that has a business...
01:19:59.000
That provides goods and services for the neighborhood.
01:20:05.000
There's a crazy video of these two gals behind a stove, and one leaves cooking.
01:20:10.000
Oh yeah, saw it yesterday, and the guy punched her in the face.
01:20:11.000
The guy comes back and wails her in the head, and then the other girl pulls a gun at him.
01:20:17.000
She keeps her gun because shit like that might happen.
01:20:24.000
This is why, and I'm not saying everybody should have guns.
01:20:26.000
It's a good thing for people to see because you only hear the other side.
01:20:29.000
You only hear guns being dangerous and killing people.
01:20:32.000
You don't hear people like that lady that just saved herself from getting the fuck beat out of her with a gun.
01:20:38.000
I saw that video, and then I saw the other video was a guy in a jewelry store.
01:20:45.000
He comes in, two or three guys, hoodies on, mask on.
01:20:49.000
You see the guys coming through the door, pulling their mask down.
01:20:54.000
And then you see a guy walk away from the jewelry display.
01:20:57.000
He walks, the camera's shooting this way, so he walks out of range of the camera.
01:21:02.000
And when the guys come in, he comes back blasting.
01:21:18.000
Yeah, and the other two ran out, and you see the guy run out of camera range.
01:21:22.000
Can you imagine being in a fucking jewelry store trying to buy a watch for your wife and a gunfight breaks out?
01:21:45.000
Listen, I just have too much PTSD to get married right now.
01:21:52.000
Yeah, but you run a business, you keep your gun.
01:21:55.000
You're just a guy on the corner, 20 guys on the corner, cops stop them, frisk, okay, taking these guns.
01:22:03.000
And the problem is defining who gets to keep one and who doesn't get to keep one.
01:22:12.000
Hold on, but the problem with that is you're never going to get them back.
01:22:15.000
Once you take them away, whoever got the guns taken away, they're never getting their guns back.
01:22:19.000
You've got to take the guns, and then there has to be more to just that.
01:22:22.000
You've got to take the guns, and there has to be an increased police presence.
01:22:25.000
You have to take the guns, and they have to be...
01:22:30.000
You have to take the guns and they have to be, you know, counseling for drug offenders.
01:22:35.000
And you take the guns and there has to be jobs in the neighborhood.
01:22:44.000
You could definitely get the illegal guns, right?
01:22:46.000
If you could somehow or another get access to them.
01:22:52.000
Because if someone has a gun legally and they haven't committed a crime, it's going to be real hard to take that gun away from them.
01:22:58.000
Yeah, but I don't think if they did the numbers, the guys with legal guns, aren't the guys that are...
01:23:04.000
The guy with a legal gun, I'm pretty sure, isn't the guy that drove past this party and shot up.
01:23:08.000
Then you've got to worry about the people with legal guns getting robbed for their guns.
01:23:19.000
It's very complicated, I think, to try to completely solve it.
01:23:23.000
And how do you get these people that are in that life that are every day involved in gang violence and...
01:23:32.000
I don't think everybody that's in gang life wants to be there.
01:23:37.000
I think they're just like, what the fuck else is there to do in this neighborhood?
01:23:41.000
I think if they had an opportunity to, you know...
01:23:44.000
I think the guy, the kid that is a very good basketball player that...
01:23:48.000
His uncle, like I said, his family lineage is gang life.
01:23:51.000
If he had a chance to go play basketball somewhere, he would take that chance.
01:23:57.000
I think you're totally right, and I think in the absence of any other chances, that's when it becomes something that's an option.
01:24:04.000
And I think it's all about the same feeling that people get when they're joining gangs or when they're like a staunch right winger or a staunch left winger.
01:24:15.000
It's like people have a desire to belong to something.
01:24:18.000
Make something that makes your life have more meaning or feel like it has more meaning.
01:24:23.000
And then when you don't have that, you'll get behind anything.
01:24:26.000
Like I say on Instagram all the time, it's like I told my little brother just yesterday.
01:24:31.000
It's the reason why they call them followers, because they just want to get behind shit they don't even understand.
01:24:37.000
My Instagram is hilarious because I get a lot of people, I'll get girls that are like, hey, I love what you're doing, I saw your shows.
01:24:43.000
Then I get the random guy that's like, you're not shit, you're just Chris's brother, you ain't shit.
01:24:48.000
And it's like, dude, you think that's going to hurt me?
01:24:56.000
You wanted my attention, you didn't know how to get it.
01:24:58.000
Well, the problem is the desire to do that in the first place.
01:25:02.000
Why would you want to make somebody feel bad for no reason?
01:25:05.000
Because you just want to be involved in some capacity.
01:25:09.000
Yeah, here's a tip to anybody that thinks like that.
01:25:13.000
There's not a single winner alive that would write something like that.
01:25:17.000
Do you think, like, maybe, like, Michael Jordan goes trolling through?
01:25:30.000
Losers always have a fucking excuse for why they're not winners.
01:25:36.000
And I think it's a lot of it is people not having good examples around them when they're growing up.
01:25:44.000
It's like we're just developing shitty people or at least people that have shitty ideas.
01:25:49.000
In these cycles where it just does never get better in certain spots.
01:26:02.000
People have to change the way they think about shit.
01:26:15.000
You know, it's just people have to figure out a way to do that less and resist the urge to do it.
01:26:23.000
You just feel good because you made somebody feel bad?
01:26:31.000
His fucking brother was the reason why I know about him in the first place.
01:26:37.000
But that's like a fake sense of feeling better about yourself.
01:26:43.000
Because it doesn't really make you feel better about yourself.
01:26:49.000
It also defines you to yourself because you know you're not a winner.
01:26:54.000
You think Elon Musk goes and trolls on Twitter and says mean shit to people and talks about girls' asses.
01:27:05.000
Oh, they got those kids out of the cave in Thailand.
01:27:09.000
That's one of those baby in a well type things.
01:27:12.000
Every few years, like a little kid falls into a well.
01:27:22.000
That and the guy blowing his pinky finger off on July 4th.
01:27:26.000
Oh, that's probably happening all year round in Texas, right?
01:27:29.000
Places where you can go to Mexico real quick, sneak over there and buy firecrackers.
01:27:34.000
I know every 4th of July in Brooklyn is like...
01:27:38.000
I bet if they had a video across America, you know how they have those time-lapse videos and you could see every kid ever documented that lost a finger in a firecracker accident?
01:27:48.000
It would look like hands are at war with firecrackers.
01:27:53.000
If you could just look across the country and see from California to New Jersey and just see every kid losing a finger.
01:28:40.000
No, he played again, so he came back and played with a cast on his hand.
01:29:05.000
That was his middle finger, and one of those ones on the other side.
01:29:17.000
Yeah, he posted a video and was like, be careful on the 4th, and had his hand...
01:29:27.000
Like if you're on a border city, just sneak over to Juarez.
01:29:31.000
We wouldn't even see them in Brooklyn until around the 4th, and they disappeared after that.
01:29:37.000
We were working in San Diego at La Jolla, La Jolla Comedy Store.
01:29:55.000
People sneak across the border to go to a dentist.
01:29:57.000
Why would you go to Tijuana to go to a dentist?
01:30:12.000
Yeah, you want a dentist that's really hustling, not a dentist that's easier if you just go to Juarez.
01:30:16.000
And don't women go down and they get butt injections also now?
01:30:29.000
Here's the border, and there's all the dentists right on the main street.
01:30:44.000
I'm tired of these marijuana and coffee stain choppers.
01:30:53.000
I'm going to tell you I'm going on a hunting trip, and then I'll strike out, and then I'll come back with some shiny choppers.
01:31:08.000
Because we'd never accept anything like that on a dude.
01:31:17.000
If guys just put fake traps in because they found out that girls like traps.
01:31:40.000
Imagine if a girl was like, your butt is so big.
01:31:44.000
And the guy's like, no, I had my butt done last year.
01:32:04.000
He'd say, I don't give a fuck what's in your titties.
01:32:16.000
Well, if women can hear the ridiculous shit that men say all the time, the shit that makes us laugh.
01:32:25.000
The gross thing is people trying to pretend that we mean everything we say, too.
01:32:37.000
It's like, some of this stuff we're just joking, you know?
01:32:44.000
Do you find that this is a more sensitive time for comedy?
01:32:47.000
That's what I'm being told and that's what I see in the news, but I refuse to, you know, change anything I do.
01:32:57.000
I'm not saying jokes and then having to issue a statement later.
01:33:03.000
If you didn't take it the way I interpreted it, if you interpreted it the wrong way, that's still on you.
01:33:18.000
Like, you could have some ridiculous scenes in a movie, but when you have a ridiculous thing that you're saying, like, people take it as a fact.
01:33:37.000
I think this is a very unique time in communication for people.
01:33:42.000
It's one of the reasons why stand-up is a little bit more challenging right now.
01:34:00.000
The first quarter I was on tour with Mike Epps.
01:34:04.000
We went out from January to like March, April, and then I'd do my own thing.
01:34:14.000
Mike brings them out, man, like 10,000, 12,000.
01:34:19.000
When you're doing a tour like that, man, and you're doing how many nights a week?
01:34:26.000
Oh, so every week, Friday, Saturday, Friday, Saturday.
01:34:37.000
And then I do that, and then from there, I do 20, maybe 25 minutes with Mike.
01:34:42.000
Then when that leg is done, I do from April, May to October, September, October, Funny Bones improv, just comedy clubs, more intimate settings with the guys I bring out.
01:34:55.000
And we do that until LA needs me, I'll be on the road.
01:34:59.000
And now they just added more dates for Mike for the fourth quarter.
01:35:03.000
We're doing Portland and San Fran and Oakland and San Diego and California and Phoenix.
01:35:11.000
You're one of those guys where I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
01:35:13.000
Like, how come people haven't caught on to the fact that Tony Rock's one of the funniest guys alive?
01:35:17.000
Yeah, I've had a lady at the show the other night.
01:35:19.000
She said, I think the whole world is sleeping on you.
01:35:25.000
And I said, that's the fucking best compliment I've ever heard in my life.
01:35:27.000
Well, the thing is, man, you've been under the radar, but getting better.
01:35:32.000
It's like, as long as I'm getting better, I'll pop up on your radar at some point.
01:35:36.000
I don't remember how long ago this conversation was.
01:35:39.000
98. 98. So I think we had this conversation more around the year 2000-ish.
01:35:51.000
And I remember coming up to you and going, Dude, you got good.
01:36:02.000
And I remember watching that set and thinking...
01:36:05.000
I don't remember what year this was, but I want to say it was like 2002 or 2003 or something like that.
01:36:10.000
Watched the set, I was like, oh dude, this guy's about to pop.
01:36:21.000
And then people say, oh, he blew up, but not knowing that, like you said, it was 2000 we had this conversation.
01:36:32.000
A lot of guys I work with at the Laugh Factory, you know, I see them all the time.
01:36:58.000
And it's just, you know, if you stay in that work mode, there's so much stuff going on in the world.
01:37:07.000
Yeah, there's always something fucked up going on, especially today.
01:37:13.000
I mean, this is one of the strangest times, I think, ever to be a comedian.
01:37:30.000
We're buddying up with dictators and who knows what's happening.
01:37:33.000
We got a reality TV star for a president and he's actually, the economy's doing well so no one knows what to say.
01:37:52.000
Well, we haven't seen all the First Ladies, so...
01:37:56.000
She's the very first hot as fuck first lady we've ever seen.
01:38:07.000
If Melania walked in the room, we stopped talking to Jackie.
01:38:25.000
Dude, when he first married her, she's a beautiful woman, like undeniably.
01:38:32.000
I see some attraction there, but I don't know if she's like, holy shit.
01:38:36.000
I think if you were around her in a party, and you both had a couple of cocktails.
01:38:42.000
And she touched your thigh, looked at you, you'd be like, oh shit, I just got lightheaded.
01:39:11.000
Yeah, that's her when she was younger, but not much younger.
01:39:14.000
I mean, I think it's just how she's wearing, what she's wearing.
01:39:18.000
Like, if you look at her in the far right pick, you know, she's more conservative.
01:39:26.000
That's a legitimate, professional, hot chick who's the first lady.
01:40:34.000
I was here filming a TV show, so every hiatus week I would go home.
01:40:38.000
And when the show wrapped, I would go on tour, so I wasn't here the whole time.
01:40:41.000
The people who like New York, especially New York comics, they say that New York comics, it's more harsh.
01:40:58.000
I come to LA, it's like, oh, I didn't know we were enemies.
01:41:10.000
I got, unfortunately, I have the brother that everybody's like, you know.
01:41:18.000
This guy's regarded as the best and that's his brother?
01:41:42.000
Like when they were both, they were both famous at the exact same time.
01:41:51.000
When I used to see him in the 90s, he had his last stand-up, I think he called it.
01:41:58.000
Oh, the last stand when he broke the microphone down.
01:42:01.000
That shit is one of my all-time favorite specials.
01:42:16.000
Damon taught him a lot about how to do stand-up.
01:42:21.000
He was a guy who would come in, do late-night spots at the comedy store.
01:42:26.000
He would just show up, and they'd put him up whenever he got there, and he would just completely explore ideas.
01:42:47.000
Whenever I see Dave on stage, Dave is like, I don't fuck this room.
01:42:50.000
I'm trying to figure this shit out for the show.
01:42:52.000
But you also want to entertain the room because they are the show, too.
01:42:56.000
So Dave is, I think, the best at dancing through that line.
01:43:00.000
He knows how to create new material better than I think anybody I've ever seen.
01:43:06.000
Mark Curry will go on stage and say, give me a topic and make it a 10-minute bit.
01:43:20.000
When he would come to the comedy store, everybody would light up.
01:43:28.000
Yeah, I saw him do a lot of sets back then, too.
01:43:31.000
Back when he was doing Hanging with Mr. Cooper, he'd drop in and do that.
01:43:42.000
He had this like 1980s black Bronco, but he had it all done up.
01:43:54.000
Engine upgrade in it, suspension upgrade, tires, wheels, the whole deal.
01:44:02.000
It just looked like an older Bronco that somebody just has on the road.
01:44:47.000
See, that's when you're smart dudes like him, man, they get sleepers.
01:44:57.000
Be able to go wherever you want to go when you want to go, you know?
01:45:05.000
I like the pickup trucks, the old, I think it's like a Chevy.
01:45:16.000
I don't know, but I know what you're talking about.
01:45:33.000
I mean, who would have ever thought, if you looked at one of those in the flesh in 1950, that someone would have something like that in 2018?
01:46:11.000
It might be giving me pricing for now, too, so I'm trying to...
01:46:15.000
Did you write how much did a pickup truck cost?
01:46:27.000
People listening to this are bored out of their fucking mind right now.
01:47:08.000
Of course, I want a Lincoln Continental with the Suicide Doors.
01:47:14.000
The Spooky the Bandit, you're gonna have the Firebird on the front and the hood?
01:47:28.000
That's one of the best looking cars of all time.
01:47:45.000
That's one of the most beautiful cars ever made in the world.
01:47:53.000
Was it called Eleanor before that movie, or did that come from something?
01:47:59.000
I think Eleanor, when you say it backwards, like whatever the acronym is, well, find it.
01:48:11.000
I think they took some kind of tuner thing, someone's name, and used it backwards.
01:48:21.000
I remember very vaguely the story of how they came up with the name Eleanor.
01:48:37.000
Maybe what I'm thinking of is someone made a car that's like Eleanor, but they spelled it backwards.
01:48:46.000
It just says Eleanor is the only Ford One Mach 1 in history to receive a car title credit.
01:48:50.000
Take the word Eleanor and spell it backwards and Google that.
01:48:55.000
I think there's a car that they're making where they spell Eleanor backwards.
01:49:14.000
Yeah, so this is a Mustang that they were spelling Eleanor backwards to make a dope Mustang.
01:49:31.000
Those cars, like that year, like into the 2015s and 16s, when they got rid of the live rear axle somewhere around...
01:49:43.000
I want to say pretty recently, like 2012 or something like that.
01:49:52.000
Before that, they used to have a solid rear axle, like a muscle car.
01:49:59.000
But you would stomp on the gas and the thing would go sideways.
01:50:02.000
It was really like having a modern muscle car with anti-lock brakes and a stick shift.
01:50:09.000
You'd buy it from the factory with 550 horsepower.
01:50:13.000
Then they got it all the way up to 700 in the last models.
01:50:16.000
The last models of the GT500 were 700 horsepower.
01:50:34.000
But apparently that's great, though, those old-school-y muscle cars for gripping the ground.
01:50:39.000
There's something about having everything all in one fat axle in the back.
01:50:45.000
Those two black stripes on the asphalt as it goes sideways.
01:50:57.000
I believe from what I just read that that car was only made for or maybe even used in that original movie.
01:51:04.000
And the guy that made it, HB, Toby, Halecki, wrote, starred, and directed that movie.
01:51:14.000
Because I saw a video of them selling one of them.
01:51:27.000
No, they do the whole thing from the beginning out.
01:51:29.000
And they make you a brand new version of a 1967 Mustang, but with modern engine, modern suspension.
01:51:43.000
But if you're some rich dude who just, you know, you look at...
01:51:47.000
There's the thing about this, like, flossing, right?
01:51:49.000
Like, if you have a Lamborghini, you're like, look at this guy's doors go up.
01:51:57.000
You pull up, like, look at this motherfucker, making it!
01:52:01.000
But if you pull up in one of those things, that's...
01:52:07.000
That's like you're driving around in an art piece.
01:52:17.000
Yeah, it's like an A+. In terms of the impact it has on guys in particular.
01:52:47.000
Come on, you pull that up in front of the club?
01:52:52.000
Do you know how much the one from the movie sold for at auction?
01:53:10.000
They were selling one of the Mustangs in the movie, John Wick.
01:53:17.000
It wasn't an Eleanor, but he had a nice one in the movie.
01:53:48.000
I get weak in the legs when I see a car like that.
01:54:05.000
That's another kind Yeah, if you had like a modern Honda Accord, you'll blow that thing off the road.
01:54:20.000
That might be one of the best looking cars of all time.
01:54:27.000
Go to that one in the upper right hand corner, young Jamie.
01:54:44.000
You could have been on your way to a goddamn Hendrix concert in that car in 1969. You would be the man.
01:54:55.000
People, you know, people were just different then.
01:54:58.000
Yeah, Hendrix probably would pull up to the concert in that, right?
01:55:04.000
Yeah, I found out there was a house that was for sale that Hendrix almost bought in Topanga Canyon.
01:55:15.000
He just walked through it like, nah, not this one.
01:55:17.000
He was apparently on his way to buying it when he died.
01:55:27.000
See if you find any other pictures of that thing.
01:55:44.000
So there's only a couple pictures of the car from the top.
01:56:14.000
I was actually going to buy a new car in the next couple months.
01:56:21.000
Something V. Some big four-door, super-powered, ultra-comfortable.
01:56:29.000
E-L-M-I-R-A-J. I've been waiting four years for this car.
01:56:33.000
And every time I go to the auto show, they're like, yeah, it's coming next year.
01:56:37.000
That sounds like a superhero in a Robert Rodriguez movie.
01:56:46.000
Four years, Cadillac, I've been waiting for this car.
01:56:58.000
You know, when we were kids, we thought about what cars would look like in the future.
01:57:02.000
That's what they would look like in the future.
01:57:09.000
That has such a futuristic, like, pause there for that picture and make that a little bit bigger.
01:57:28.000
And you say to your girl, like, I don't get it.
01:57:43.000
The last car my pops had before he passed away was a burgundy Cadillac.
01:57:49.000
And I didn't, you know, growing up in New York, I didn't need a car.
01:57:52.000
So when I moved to LA, I was like, oh shit, I gotta get a car to get around.
01:58:01.000
They make some old school cars too that you could actually get fixed up and drive around.
01:58:07.000
I'm going to get an oldie and put it in the hands of a caretaker and let them just fix it up.
01:58:31.000
Because I don't want anybody to mistake me for the mission badge.
01:58:34.000
I don't want no girl running up in my car at In-N-Out Burger like, I got your money, daddy.
01:58:41.000
I like burgundy with a little bit of metallic flake to it.
01:58:53.000
I mean, you gotta respect the fact that it takes a long time to stop those fuckers.
01:59:09.000
That was back when they didn't know what the fuck aerodynamics was.
01:59:13.000
Oh, that's what we're talking about right there.
01:59:35.000
They just went through a period of time where they were making these giant boats.
01:59:39.000
Like the Suicide Door Continental that you talked about.
01:59:47.000
That's another one of the best cars I've probably ever made.
01:59:49.000
You know what's another best car I ever made that I would never want to park anywhere?
02:00:11.000
That's not in any way practical in terms of its shape.
02:00:16.000
That wind's got to go into that grill in a weird way and probably slows it down.
02:00:20.000
It's like having a little mini parachute in the front of your hood.
02:00:23.000
Obviously, I don't know shit about aerodynamics.
02:00:35.000
Like, that car just represents a different world.
02:00:45.000
In 1970, it got weird, because then they put the bumper all around the front.
02:01:25.000
That's a good picture, Jamie, but the other one's better because you could see the...
02:01:38.000
The bumper and the grill are like, it's got an up bumper and a down bumper.
02:01:58.000
You're going to push that through to the GM? Hey, did you bring up my idea about the double bumper?
02:02:24.000
Look at that one, that black one, up on the upper left-hand corner.
02:02:33.000
Those people just had a different way of looking at automobiles.
02:02:37.000
They weren't confined by all the safety regulations.
02:02:41.000
What's the spot at Bob's Big Boy in Burbank when they have the cars out of there?
02:02:51.000
But I guess those cars and coffees and things, you ever done one of those?
02:03:01.000
They have them in fucking Irvine and all over the place.
02:03:05.000
I do the auto show every year and I ask about the El Mirage and they're like, yeah, next year.
02:03:15.000
No, I'll have other cars, but there's going to be a Caddy somewhere.
02:03:24.000
It's a different kind of luxury car, and they're really doing it right now, too.
02:03:41.000
I haven't driven one, but I've ridden as a passenger in one.
02:03:47.000
I like the new, well, it's foreign, but that new BMW 7. Mm-hmm.
02:03:58.000
There's one version of it that's the most expensive BMW they've ever made.
02:04:01.000
And it's supposed to be the most technologically advanced.
02:04:12.000
Yeah, that's the difference between living here and living in New York.
02:04:15.000
Living in New York, so many people don't have cars.
02:04:21.000
Then you have to find parking and you go, fuck this car, man.
02:04:28.000
It was like, man, I got to get up and move it every morning.
02:04:31.000
And when I go into the city, I got to find parking.
02:04:35.000
And when you drive down the street and you see ones with boots on them, people don't...
02:04:43.000
In LA, sometimes people say, hey, if you already have a ticket, they won't put another one?
02:04:47.000
In New York, they'll put a ticket on top of a ticket.
02:05:08.000
Like that Thunderbird didn't really totally work, but the Challenger worked perfect.
02:05:16.000
But the Thunderbird, people are like, what are we doing here?
02:05:26.000
I don't think Ford makes anything other than Mustangs and trucks.
02:05:28.000
I think they gave up on every single car they made.
02:05:35.000
Did they have a Focus or did they stop making that?
02:05:42.000
I think recently they said they're going to cancel every car except the Mustang and they're just going to make trucks.
02:05:52.000
Well, I think they'd probably make that Ford GT, too, in limited numbers.
02:05:58.000
Yeah, that's a different company that takes a Mustang and then they put an aftermarket kit on it.
02:06:05.000
They do Corvettes and a bunch of other shit, too.
02:06:14.000
I've heard of Hennessy Performance, but what are we talking about?
02:06:18.000
They take these cars and they'll do it to an El Dorado.
02:06:30.000
They'll take a regular car and put 1,000 horsepower in it.
02:06:43.000
But Shelby, they sell from the Ford dealerships.
02:06:52.000
I thought you meant drunk when I'm drunk in my performance on Hennessy.
02:07:00.000
They're doing like the Explorer and shit like that.
02:07:19.000
They figured out a perfect way to make a shape that makes you think about old cars but looks like a new car.
02:07:33.000
I hope we didn't bore the shit out of you people.
02:07:54.000
Whoever is camping on the Tony Rock name, give it up.