Joe Rogan Experience #1232 - Nick Di Paolo
Episode Stats
Length
2 hours and 1 minute
Words per Minute
197.67073
Summary
Randy Credico is a stand-up comedian who has been involved in the Roger Stone scandal for a long time. We talk about how they met, how they became friends, and how the FBI raided Roger Stone's house and arrested him. We also talk about the fact that Roger Stone has a tattoo of a man with a Nixon symbol on his back. And we talk about why we think he's a douchebag and why we love him for it. This episode is brought to you by LaCie and produced by Joe D'Andrea. Thank you to our sponsor, Caff Monster, for making great tasting coffee and fueling the podcast. Cheers, Joe and Joe. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts and other podcasting platforms. We'll be looking out for new episodes in 2020. Thanks for listening and share the podcast with your friends and family. Timestamps: 1:00 - Who's your favorite fall off crazie? 2:30 - What kind of coffee do you like? 3:15 - How did you like the coffee? 4:40 - Who do you think Roger Stone s tattoo is good? 5:20 - What is your favorite Nixon tattoo? 6:00 7:40 8:00 Is he a douchster? 9:10 - What are you a narcissist? 11: What is the worst thing you ve ever heard of Roger Stone did? 12: What s your favorite political icon? 13:30 14: What's your favourite political symbol? 15:20 16:10 17: What do you don t like about a man you ve a gay pride parade? 16 - What s a gay rights parade? 18:00 | What s he s a pro-gay rights march? 19:30 | What's a gay parade in New York City? 21:40 | Is he just over the place? 22:30 Is he pro-something? 23:20 | Who's a 60 something? 25:00 / 16: Is he crazy? 26:00 // 15:00 & 16:00/16:00 +17:00 Or do you have a gay right wing tattoo ? 27:30 +16:50 22 :00
Transcript
00:00:01.000
I have a lot of friends that are fall off crazies.
00:00:15.000
You've got to be able to work out where you work.
00:00:20.000
Two bad things aren't working out well for you, Joe.
00:00:26.000
So we were talking before the podcast, and I said, save this, because it's hilarious.
00:00:30.000
Randy Credico, who's a stand-up comedian, Has been involved in this Roger Stone thing?
00:00:38.000
As you know, Roger Stone this morning, the FBI raided, you know, took him out of his house.
00:00:49.000
Yeah, they asked me to get him on, and I was like, eh, I think I'm going to duck that one.
00:00:58.000
Yeah, and so is Randy, and they've known each other forever.
00:01:17.000
It was him and a bunch of other guys, and it was all political.
00:01:35.000
Yeah, and they had like a whole thing they were doing, almost like a tour.
00:01:40.000
You know, like super left-wing, politically aware.
00:01:47.000
I want to say this is the 90s they were doing this.
00:01:52.000
I mean, I'd watch him die every night at the Catch Rising Star, because he'd be up there doing such inside political shit.
00:01:59.000
He'd be talking about a bill that was passed that day on the floor, or whatever the fuck, and the crowd would be staring at him.
00:02:23.000
He stayed at my apartment when I lived out here in L.A. And he fucking tried to pick up my wife after I left.
00:02:34.000
He sent me a picture of him, 2016, in front of the embassy in London, where, what's his name was held up?
00:02:47.000
And then all that shit came out about WikiLeaks and stuff.
00:02:49.000
So they thought he might have been the intermediary.
00:03:06.000
...associate's dog if he cooperated with Russia Investigate.
00:03:12.000
Oh, fucking, you gotta read the text that Roger Stone, they're public, I think, would send to Randy.
00:03:22.000
I'm gonna take your fucking, that's why I love this guy.
00:03:24.000
This guy had a Nixon tattoo when he was 18 on his back.
00:03:34.000
Well, he's pro just, yeah, you know, express yourself.
00:03:39.000
But he's a right, I mean, he had a Nixon tattoo.
00:03:42.000
But all the right wing people to get, look at this.
00:03:54.000
And he loved my radio show on Sirius, and he hosted InfoWars about six months ago.
00:04:00.000
He had me on as a guest when I got punched in the face by that broad.
00:04:05.000
So, yeah, they raided the FBI, raided his house, took him out today.
00:04:16.000
You know, to stop contesting what Stone said in front of when he testified.
00:04:35.000
And he's like, well, call me before the show or let me know.
00:04:38.000
He goes, there's not too much I can say right now.
00:04:46.000
He goes, I can't say much because they just arrested the FBI. They're going to turn, they're trying to, I see what Mueller's doing.
00:04:57.000
So he's going to threaten him with, you know, he's 60-something years old, so he can spend the rest of his life in prison or talk.
00:05:06.000
If you had a problem and that guy was coming after you, like, oh my God.
00:05:13.000
Like, by the time this actually gets to Trump, he's going to be...
00:05:20.000
I think that's different than what you're thinking.
00:05:25.000
By the time they get to Trump, he's already so nerve-wracked.
00:05:33.000
Slowly but surely takes away all the people around him.
00:05:47.000
You notice you never hear a word out of Ivanka anymore?
00:05:56.000
But if you want to know about Mueller, like you said, and how fucking creepy he is, he was the head of the FBI during the 80s when the Whitey Bulger shit went down.
00:06:13.000
Wrongly, it turns out, two of them died in prison.
00:06:20.000
Because they would do things and the FBI would let them get away with it because they were providing information.
00:06:28.000
And two guys died in prison, wrongly, by the way.
00:06:33.000
I know he's a Marine, a decorated Marine and shit.
00:06:37.000
They make those decisions where they're just going to help a person who's a criminal because that criminal is providing information that can allow them to get more criminals.
00:06:46.000
Whitey was providing all kinds of shit about the guineas in East Boston.
00:06:53.000
You know, I used to train a guy who was one of Whitey's hitmen.
00:07:05.000
When I was teaching Taekwondo, I had one of the guys that was in my class that was whacking people for Whitey Bulger.
00:07:10.000
He was asking me, if you want to kill somebody with your bare hands, where would you hit them?
00:07:21.000
But, you know, Kevin, you know, he went away, too.
00:07:35.000
Like, they caught him with blood under his fingernail.
00:07:49.000
How did Hannity's attempt to link Mueller to Whitey Bulger hold up?
00:07:52.000
This article in the Boston Globe says that's not true.
00:07:59.000
Oh, he wasn't at the FBI. He corrupted his handlers.
00:08:53.000
It says, did Mueller know the four men have been wrongly convicted and looked the other way?
00:09:00.000
According to several attorneys, for the men, voluminous court records, and a former federal judge who presided over their wrongful imprisonment trial.
00:09:12.000
Gertner found the FBI deliberately withheld evidence that the four men were innocent.
00:09:17.000
The Bureau helped cover up the injustice for...
00:09:20.000
Jesus Christ, I fucking hate reading shit like that.
00:09:22.000
She ordered the government to pay the men and their families $101.7 million.
00:09:33.000
You were never going to make a hundred million.
00:09:36.000
If they all got a hundred million, if every one of them got a hundred million, I mean, I'm in.
00:09:42.000
How many times do you get fucked while you're in jail?
00:09:48.000
So, maybe it was just a rumor that he was a part of that.
00:09:51.000
Well, like you said, though, that's the FBI. As soon as the story broke, I'm sure they called the paper and said, listen, get your facts straight.
00:09:56.000
Well, how crazy is it that the FBI covered up the information and knew those guys were innocent?
00:10:16.000
When Whitey Bulger was out here, you know they caught him because his wife was yelling and shit all the time?
00:10:24.000
I used to sell meat door to door before I started comedy, and I used to go to fucking Winter Hill, not knowing where I was.
00:10:31.000
And I would wonder why people would take out my shit and they'd go, that breaks down like 40 bucks a pound, get the fuck out.
00:10:38.000
And then somebody explained to me, you know, Winter Hill is like Whitey Bulger's.
00:10:48.000
I knocked on the door a couple of guys in Revere that were like fucking connected.
00:10:52.000
My buddy Al knew who they were and shit later on.
00:10:54.000
Well, they probably knew people from meatpacking.
00:10:59.000
And I'm doing my little spiel there for a boiler, you know, a fucking boiler room operation.
00:11:08.000
You could tell they were like bookies, you know.
00:11:17.000
And I was in Rhode Island banging doors, and I got the same response.
00:11:22.000
And I looked down, I see in the streets, the lines on the streets are red, white, and green.
00:11:26.000
I was in Federal Hill in Providence, where the mafia started.
00:11:32.000
Whitey Bulger's Santa Monica hideout was full of money.
00:11:52.000
It's just amazing how much corruption was involved in that case.
00:11:56.000
Which federal government was a part of it, and they let that monster, they let him thrive.
00:12:09.000
Whenever you're doing that, whenever you're allowing someone to commit murder and deal drugs to get other people that are committing murder and dealing drugs, it's like, what?
00:12:21.000
This is very unfortunate, but this is just what happens when you have a game.
00:12:29.000
You have a certain amount of collars you have to make.
00:12:31.000
And if you can make more collars because you're in bed with a bad guy, especially if maybe you grew up in that neighborhood and it's always been kind of an accepted part of that neighborhood.
00:12:55.000
I mean, that's one of the reasons why cops and people have such a weird relationship, because they're always looking to arrest people.
00:12:59.000
And your cops talk, and you're like, ah, don't put me on your record.
00:13:05.000
And they just want, maybe I can get you for something.
00:13:09.000
When they have quotas, like when you have quote, like what would the police force do if nobody broke crimes anymore?
00:13:19.000
Like legitimately, if they really do have quotas.
00:13:23.000
But what if everybody got on mushrooms and the world got cleaned up?
00:13:29.000
I was wondering how long it would take to get there.
00:13:52.000
It just, the whole, I mean, the Mueller thing is very, it's very interesting.
00:13:56.000
It's very interesting because you're watching a professional, like, cast a web.
00:14:06.000
And if they'll do it against a Roger Stone, like you said, they'll do, you know.
00:14:11.000
Well, Jamie said they opened up the government today to distract from the fact that Roger Stone got arrested.
00:14:25.000
But yeah, he's gonna threaten Stone with, you know...
00:14:29.000
He's like 66. Threatens him with 10 years, he's probably gonna...
00:14:45.000
They actually come up with the lyrics they create.
00:14:49.000
What do you think is going to happen to Trump, if you had to guess?
00:15:05.000
I shouldn't say that only because I think Mueller's pretty fucking evil and will come up with something.
00:15:10.000
Well, you know, what, impeachment at the worst?
00:15:18.000
Well, if there was obstruction of justice, if there was collusion, if there was any sort of...
00:15:24.000
If they can prove that there was some sort of concerted effort to undermine democracy.
00:15:33.000
Even with Roger Stone, they're not charging him with collusion or conspiracy.
00:15:40.000
They don't have them for collusion or conspiracy.
00:15:43.000
They're lying covering up the interactions with Russians, right?
00:15:50.000
You know, Jamie was talking about something yesterday, and I started listening to this recent Sam Harris podcast, and it is fucking fascinating how much...
00:16:21.000
When CNN looked into it, they just kind of asked Twitter, what's going on with this account?
00:16:25.000
And by the time they'd asked them, they just suspended the account, so it's gone.
00:16:29.000
But you said they suspended the account because the account was a fake account.
00:16:32.000
Yeah, they thought it was posing as a California teacher.
00:16:47.000
I just was sort of saying, like, it went into a fake account of some...
00:16:52.000
Yeah, well, they're trying to get people against each other.
00:16:56.000
Like, people need to understand that this is actually really happening.
00:17:03.000
Well, if you stop and think about it, has there ever been a time where the left and the right were more at each other's throats than right now?
00:17:12.000
But is CNN enough to really get people turned against each other like this?
00:17:19.000
And the way that comes from, there's an amazing Radiolab podcast about this where they talk to people that actually worked in these troll farms.
00:17:28.000
And that these people, they would both be left-wing and right-wing.
00:17:32.000
And this is one of the things that they're talking about on the Sam Harris podcast.
00:17:41.000
They'll pose as, like, pro-choice people and say ridiculous shit.
00:17:47.000
And then they'll pose as pro-life people with, like, an American flag and, you know, MAGA in the, you know, the hashtag MAGA and their heading.
00:17:58.000
And they're just trying to get people riled up.
00:18:01.000
And you see people jump on board and start chiming in.
00:18:04.000
But I was talking to a comic that we were talking about that I won't bring his name up.
00:18:14.000
I'm not going to remember his name, but this is a clip of this Russian guy who worked for the KGB, defected over here, and he was explaining how Russia does that.
00:18:29.000
They fuck with the system in any way, shape, or form in order to achieve a desired result.
00:18:34.000
I think the Russians are the best at it, apparently.
00:18:37.000
Well, I just think they're way more dedicated to it.
00:18:39.000
I mean, it's a sneaky way to go about doing things, too, because Russia doesn't have the kind of money that the United States has.
00:19:00.000
The economy and everything, they're like a third world shithole.
00:19:03.000
Yeah, well, they're like a small European country.
00:19:05.000
But it's really interesting when you listen to these podcasts about how much effort they put into sowing discourse, or discord, to getting people upset with each other, to starting arguments, and to saying things that are going to upset people in order to get the right versus the left.
00:19:54.000
First of all, I don't need to hear it in every fucking airport before I'm doing a gig.
00:19:58.000
The last fucking words I want to hear were Wolf Blitzer before my plane crashes.
00:20:02.000
Somebody told me Wolf Blitzer got on Jeopardy and they exposed him.
00:20:07.000
Because, you know, people get on television, they read off a teleprompter, you think they're brilliant.
00:20:22.000
Remember they have celebrities on once in a while?
00:20:43.000
Does he still write for, there he is, Wolf Blitzer, minus $4,000, you dumbass.
00:20:55.000
Well, you know, people can pretend to be smart, you know?
00:20:58.000
You read off the teleprompter, they give you the script, you know?
00:21:01.000
But was Jonathan Groff, does he still write for Conan?
00:21:14.000
I don't think he does stand-up anymore, though.
00:21:33.000
How about when Donna Brazile had the notes for Hillary before the fucking Bernie?
00:21:40.000
Wasn't that enough to discredit the CNN? Yes, she was a pundit.
00:21:44.000
That's what's ridiculous, that they had her on after that.
00:21:48.000
That they told her what the questions were going to be.
00:21:52.000
What's interesting is they fucked her over, and then she came out with a book.
00:21:59.000
I've only read passages of it, but what I read about how they rigged the DNC, how they fucked Bernie out of the primaries.
00:22:17.000
But you don't think the mainstream media is sort of like a propaganda arm for the Democratic Party?
00:22:22.000
Well, they definitely think they're working for the good.
00:22:37.000
Well, I guess I was probably pretty negative with Bush.
00:22:41.000
No, it was, but they always, since I've been a kid...
00:22:44.000
I mean, Reagan was a dummy and just a fucking B-actor and an idiot and a racist.
00:22:51.000
George Bush Sr., George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, war monger.
00:23:02.000
Remember how he was portrayed on SNL? Yeah, he was always falling down.
00:23:11.000
The mainstream media has always sort of been more liberal.
00:23:15.000
Right, but then you have Fox News, which goes far the other way.
00:23:18.000
Well, there are opinion shows, but at least when you watch Fox News, which everybody who hates Fox News never watches it, number one, but they at least have liberals on.
00:23:30.000
Because he looks like every guy that bullied him as a kid.
00:23:49.000
I've got to get you out of L.A. I'm afraid you're going to get diseased.
00:24:03.000
Because he's an alpha male, blonde-haired, blue-eyed fucking billionaire.
00:24:08.000
That's the embodiment of the devil for the left.
00:24:14.000
It has nothing to do with him lying all the time?
00:24:21.000
As opposed to Obama going, oh, you can keep your health care.
00:24:25.000
He doesn't lie any more than any other president.
00:24:36.000
Oh, he's a bullshitter, but that's what we need.
00:25:00.000
I was talking to Mike Baker, who used to work for the CIA. Oh, I thought you meant my fucking web guy.
00:25:08.000
Mike Baker from the CIA says if he did anything remotely like what Hillary did, he'd be in jail for 30 years.
00:25:16.000
Remember the kid in the submarine that worked for the Navy that took pictures of the submarine?
00:25:20.000
I mean, he took a selfie and it had bad shit in the background that he wasn't supposed to take photos of.
00:25:28.000
So I would just like to see some equity as far as people being held accountable on both sides.
00:25:34.000
Well, maybe it would have been different if Hillary made it through.
00:25:37.000
Maybe it would have been different in terms of media coverage if she actually became president.
00:25:48.000
Once Donna Brazile's book came out and people have an understanding about the inner workings of the party.
00:26:12.000
Well, I was trying to explain to a friend who was talking about doing a podcast deal with a network.
00:26:23.000
It can be mainstream and it's free of everything.
00:26:28.000
And you're going to let a bunch of pencil pushers and button pressers, they're going to tell you what you can and can't say, which direction you can and can't go.
00:26:41.000
With conservatives, like shutting down Dennis Prager.
00:26:51.000
I'm talking about a company, you going into business with them, where you're a podcaster, you're free and independent, and it's probably the only thing in the world where you can be completely free and independent and still reach millions of people.
00:27:10.000
And people like Dennis Prager, a religious right guy, his show gets shut down on YouTube.
00:27:21.000
I know he does those shows with Carolla, but I didn't know he was shut down.
00:27:25.000
I used to listen to him when I lived in L.A. He's a conservative religious Jewish guy.
00:27:32.000
I mean, that's when we're getting to a dangerous territory.
00:27:35.000
Pull up what happened to him, because I'm completely ignorant about this.
00:27:46.000
They said you can't have a page on YouTube anymore.
00:27:52.000
Not specifically, but I know it was labeled hate.
00:27:55.000
And if you listen to this guy for 10 minutes, he's the most congenial, fair-minded, you know, but he's a, you know, religious guy.
00:28:08.000
He's actually an intellectual from England who wrote a book about immigrants in Europe called The Strange Death.
00:28:20.000
I think it's called Islam and the Strange Death of Europe.
00:28:23.000
And he's basically talking about how people from these countries that have emigrated into Europe are changing the culture.
00:28:33.000
There's all sorts of, you know, crimes and things that are happening that didn't exist before.
00:28:39.000
And people are developing these communities of like-minded people that didn't exist before.
00:28:45.000
And he's saying that this is, you know, this is fundamentally dangerous.
00:28:49.000
But he's saying it from a perspective of understanding the actual facts involved and talking about the situation and talking about how these are people that don't respect homosexuals.
00:29:00.000
They want to throw them off roofs and they have these opinions about people that are extremely antiquated and not aligned with European values in the modern Western world.
00:29:12.000
He and Sam Harris had a conversation, and that conversation got flagged on YouTube.
00:29:17.000
It got flagged because someone put it up in their...
00:29:31.000
So he puts it on his playlist and he gets a community guideline strike against him for putting up this conversation between two intellectuals.
00:29:40.000
So I have this conversation with this lady at YouTube.
00:29:48.000
You're talking about two intellectuals having a discussion about a real thing that's happening right now in Europe.
00:29:54.000
If you listen to the podcast, there's no slurs used, just facts.
00:29:59.000
But this was the way she said it, because it's hate speech.
00:30:11.000
But my point is they're cracking down on people who lean right, whether it's Twitter.
00:30:26.000
What's the name of the company that owns Alphabet?
00:30:37.000
About when you disagree with a liberal or whatever.
00:30:50.000
If you didn't agree with Obama's policies, you're a bigot or a racist.
00:30:58.000
But now that the social media, Google, controls almost all the information you and I hear every day.
00:31:06.000
So look up – yeah, Prager is the first example that comes to mind.
00:31:11.000
That guy – excuse me – yeah, because he's, you know, a Christian or whatever.
00:31:23.000
Looking it up, unless what I just read was wrong, they weren't, from YouTube at least, they weren't deleted.
00:31:32.000
The adult thing, like you have to have an account that says you're 18 or older or something like that.
00:31:38.000
And they were fighting and having a lawsuit against that, saying that what they have in their videos shouldn't be behind that wall, whatever that is.
00:31:52.000
I went to a couple different websites to see it, but they were also, like yesterday, they had ads blacklisted from Spotify.
00:31:58.000
So they had ads that were, I guess, initially approved, and now they have been disapproved, and they haven't really explained to them why.
00:32:24.000
So if you go to the Dennis Prager YouTube channel, it doesn't exist?
00:32:29.000
So the idea that they would make that 18 +, because it's conservative?
00:32:56.000
If that's what it was about, it's about them being restricted.
00:32:59.000
Yeah, I am angry, because we're not getting the full story here.
00:33:01.000
Well, I mean, we're just finding out that it's up right now.
00:33:09.000
My point being is, these big tech companies are crushing conservative opinions for the most part, right?
00:33:19.000
If you're going after a guy like Dennis Prager, who again is the most congenial guy, never swears, very mild-mannered, very cool and calm, whether you agree with him or disagree with him, the way to go about something like this if you disagree with someone is not to shut them down.
00:33:44.000
You saw what happened with that guy when he provided all this information about one of the reasons why women don't get into tech.
00:33:50.000
And they labeled him as being a misogynist and a woman hater.
00:33:54.000
Like, no, he's giving you scientific studies that show that women have different interests.
00:34:00.000
Lawrence Summers was actually the president of Harvard, and he was giving a speech, and that's all he said.
00:34:07.000
He brought up the numbers as far as males going into science and math.
00:34:11.000
He didn't say women aren't good at it, and he got fucking canned from Harvard.
00:34:20.000
If it disagrees with the orthodoxy, they'll come down on you.
00:34:23.000
Even if it's factual, like James Damore, and you could clearly back it up.
00:34:30.000
Not only that, that James Damore guy put a page and a half in there on strategies for encouraging women to get into tech.
00:34:41.000
That was what started off, because all these intellectuals came to his side.
00:34:44.000
They go, look, why are we doing all this research if you guys completely ignore it every time it comes up?
00:34:49.000
Like, you're pretending that this research is not valid.
00:34:53.000
It's scientific information that shows that certain types of people are more interested in different things.
00:35:00.000
That's why boy toys and girl toys are different.
00:35:06.000
I mean, it's basically a more complex version of that.
00:35:09.000
And he's essentially saying, women like different things.
00:35:16.000
The only difference between the sex is the socially constructed obstacles.
00:35:26.000
They should come here and take a look at your place.
00:35:31.000
I've got some female stuff here from when my kids come over.
00:35:34.000
Tell them what you said to me when I said, what a fucking great place.
00:35:38.000
Oh, this is what happens when women don't get to tell you what to do.
00:35:50.000
But the problem is, in this society, male energy, male thinking, male energy is vilified.
00:35:55.000
And you're taught to think there's something wrong with being masculine.
00:35:59.000
Being masculine is the reason why we don't speak German.
00:36:08.000
Well, the whole reason why you need male people is because there's male people at other places that will take away your shit and kill your people and rape.
00:36:21.000
Just because there are evil men, they are evil men.
00:36:33.000
But this toxic masculinity is just fucking hilarious.
00:36:40.000
Well, there's just so many dumb phrases like that, you know?
00:36:54.000
Yeah, like, you're imposing the norms, like, as if heterosexuality is normal.
00:36:59.000
Well, did you see, what was the story a couple days ago?
00:37:05.000
They're trying to, the he, you can't say he or she, it's they now.
00:37:18.000
They had her in the meeting, the actual town hall or city where they're passing the ordinance, and at the end she goes, my grammar teacher wouldn't approve of this.
00:37:29.000
She's rolling around, but we won't hear from her.
00:37:31.000
She said her, and somebody called her out on it.
00:37:46.000
California state senator bans the use of he and she during committee hearings.
00:37:50.000
Oh, look at her with her perfect fucking liberal haircut.
00:38:14.000
Jackson was then interrupted by listeners who corrected her usage and demand...
00:38:20.000
Corrected her usage and demand that she use the word they or them.
00:38:30.000
They're telling people what to do and what not to do, and it's about power.
00:38:40.000
What it is, is they're just deciding that this is a thing that they're going to agree to, and they're going to force other people to comply.
00:38:47.000
Half the game is just getting people to comply.
00:38:50.000
Well, you do that by, and you start with language.
00:38:52.000
You control people's behavior through language, which is the definition of political growth.
00:38:56.000
Well, that's what Carlin always said, that fascism is just political correctness with good manners.
00:39:01.000
Or political correctness is fascism with good manners.
00:39:04.000
How about, you saw a clip of Louis at Governors when he was talking about this, how the, you know, the millennials or whoever demanding what we call them.
00:39:15.000
And he goes, okay, Louis goes, okay, I'm a location.
00:39:21.000
Then he goes, I gotta come up with something more clever, not as harsh, whatever.
00:39:29.000
What did you think about all that stuff getting leaked?
00:39:34.000
You know, Stan Hope had a really good point about that.
00:39:38.000
Dougie was saying, like, look, if this was a movie, if you took that movie and filmed it in the movie theater and then put it online, you'd go to jail.
00:39:50.000
But they think they can ruin his work because he jerked off in front of some people.
00:39:55.000
I don't even know if the person that leaked it was a Louis hater.
00:40:05.000
It was the brokerage, which is the same owners, a few years ago.
00:40:09.000
And I'm up there doing my shit and working on a new hour.
00:40:11.000
I look down, and the kid about 56th row, I see him.
00:40:18.000
So I come down off the stage, he doesn't even hear me, and I grab the phone out of his hand.
00:40:23.000
I go, dude, you came out of it because you're a fan of mine, right?
00:40:28.000
The problem with this is, if you put this shit online, I'm working on news...
00:40:35.000
Yeah, to all the other fans that listen to it, for sure.
00:40:41.000
Like, if you want to release it half-baked, like, when you first start working on a bit, you have a premise, you got kind of an idea where it's going.
00:40:50.000
Yeah, and then it eventually becomes a bit that you would put on a special.
00:40:56.000
And it looks shitty, or if it's done, if you're doing a bit that's complete, it becomes old.
00:41:03.000
Well, that was some of the things that people were saying about Louis, that the material's sloppy, it's not like it's old stuff.
00:41:11.000
Like, if you came to the store and saw him working on a set a few years back, you would see the same kind of stuff.
00:41:16.000
I got a couple comments like that when I put my last special out.
00:41:20.000
Well, you came out to see me eight, ten months ago when I was working on it.
00:41:28.000
Because it seems like when you're on stage and you're killing...
00:41:32.000
And it seems like you're doing something that they can do.
00:41:38.000
It's like there's no other art form like that where it's just talking.
00:41:51.000
People have, you know, because people have made their friends laugh.
00:41:58.000
Because, you know, you make your friends laugh.
00:42:00.000
Everybody's made their friends laugh, whether you're a comic or not.
00:42:03.000
I call people out when they look bored with me or they have their arms folded.
00:42:07.000
I go, dude, you got that smug look in your face.
00:42:09.000
I know you could do this too, but you'd rather work at the fucking mattress factory 80 hours a week and making fucking $400.
00:42:16.000
There's people out there working at the mattress factory right now listening to this going, man, fuck you, Nick DePaul.
00:42:21.000
Whoa, hey, how about you just ignore the guy that's sitting...
00:42:31.000
What am I getting at the Comedy Palace tonight in San Diego?
00:42:34.000
I'd have to pay you a lot of money to build me a mattress.
00:42:43.000
You have to pay for the foam and stitch it all together.
00:43:16.000
I got a flag they sent me when I did the Afghanistan-USO thing.
00:43:24.000
I had it hanging, but then I made a gym out of my fucking whatever, so I don't know where it is.
00:43:31.000
I should probably put it back up, shouldn't I? Yeah.
00:43:36.000
The Louis C.K. set, you know, was very similar, in my opinion, to all the shit that he did before he got in trouble.
00:43:48.000
I mean, people forget that this is a guy who went on Saturday Night Live and did a joke about pedophiles.
00:43:53.000
And about, you know, maybe we should let them get away with it so they don't kill your kids.
00:44:01.000
But he was the darling of the left back then, and so he was allowed to get away with that.
00:44:06.000
If he tried to do that same material, if he hadn't done that then and instead did that now, people would be fucking horrified.
00:44:13.000
What is it, Joe, about offending women or today's feminists?
00:44:19.000
They are at the, in my opinion, all this political correctness that we hate so much, shutting down, they are at the core of it.
00:44:29.000
The zeitgeist of the times is like a fat chick's emotion.
00:44:38.000
Well, it's also because people are realizing now that they can make an impact.
00:44:41.000
One of the things that I read, because he's doing this thing in Pittsburgh.
00:44:47.000
And this lady who wrote the article wrote that he's making people put their cell phones in bags, much like comedians Dave Chappelle and Joe Rogan do.
00:44:56.000
I've done it before, but I only did it when I was filming my Netflix special.
00:44:59.000
So I didn't want people putting the material out right before I was releasing the special.
00:45:02.000
And then afterwards, I decided it was too much of a pain in the ass.
00:45:05.000
But the only reason why I was doing it, it had nothing to do with...
00:45:10.000
She said, because they know words can offend, and they don't want the consequences.
00:45:16.000
Anyways, it's going to be out to the public, you dope.
00:45:20.000
If you're looking to get offended, go watch my Netflix special.
00:45:27.000
I want to work it out so that it has the maximum amount of laughs with the minimum amount of people getting it the wrong way.
00:45:37.000
So it's all about wording and sitting it upright and listening to it and going, maybe there's a better way.
00:45:42.000
You can't do that if somebody releases your shit.
00:45:44.000
So these people that don't know comedy and they're saying this, you have no idea what the process is like.
00:45:50.000
And if you do, you would respect it and appreciate it.
00:45:53.000
And the people that are comics that don't respect and appreciate the process...
00:45:59.000
But it's just because people can make an impact.
00:46:03.000
Just like the people yelling at her, you know, that she said, she said, oh, my grandmother would be rolling over in her grave.
00:46:13.000
They're just trying to get a reaction from you.
00:46:16.000
They're just knowing that they can say something and they can have some sort of an impact.
00:46:21.000
We're going to get Louis C.K. banned from here.
00:46:23.000
We're going to get Nick DiPaolo kicked out of this club.
00:46:27.000
You talk negatively about women and women's empowerment and that's dangerous to girls.
00:46:34.000
Of course, one of the best clubs in the country.
00:46:42.000
Well, there was a bachelorette party ruining the middle guy's set, the MC set.
00:46:59.000
And it turns out a fat cunt was running the club.
00:47:10.000
And I get kicked out for smoking on stage at Rooster T-Feathers.
00:47:31.000
15-20 years ago, I was a social smoker, because everybody, the comedy seller, I'd be sitting across a Mattel, breathing in his shit, and I'm like, I might as well put a filter in my mouth.
00:47:39.000
And so, you know, I'd have one or two, but then I really picked up the pace about a year ago.
00:48:19.000
My grandfather smoked Pall Malls on Felted and Camels when he was 13 years old.
00:48:33.000
I do it in my act, though, because my friends go, why would you start at this age?
00:48:36.000
And I go, why would you start in your 20s so you could have ass cancer in your 40s?
00:48:42.000
If a doctor tells me I have cancer in 25 years, I'm going to kiss him on the lips.
00:48:49.000
They're like, I wish I smoked when I was a fucking kid.
00:49:04.000
I don't want to be that lady that looks like Popeye.
00:49:11.000
And then she turned into Popeye with the voice and everything.
00:49:29.000
If I didn't do it, I would look like a regular 51-year-old man.
00:49:36.000
If I can get you on it, go to a doctor to get your hormone levels checked.
00:49:40.000
I'll do it tomorrow, and I'll quit the cigarettes.
00:49:45.000
I mean, I destroyed my shoulders playing football, and I have aches and pains.
00:49:50.000
But, you know, I'm 593 quarters, 213. That's not too bad, but you're a thick dude.
00:50:10.000
Plus I haven't been running because I had some stem cells shot into my knee.
00:50:25.000
And then I run miles in the hills every day a week later after the shots.
00:50:39.000
There's a bunch of different things you could do to help that before it gets real bad.
00:50:43.000
But one of the things they're doing in Panama...
00:50:56.000
And Mel Gibson's dad was 92 when he went down there.
00:51:06.000
That's what happens when you're 92 and you live 8 more years.
00:51:11.000
No, that's what happens when you yell shit out.
00:51:17.000
Well, it's only the booze that makes them racist.
00:51:41.000
I thought you co-produced it when I watched it.
00:51:47.000
I think he's a very intense, very unusual, eccentric guy.
00:51:53.000
Like, just being around him, you get this sense of his energy.
00:52:02.000
Like, a lot of that, I think, probably came, like, that character probably came from, like, the dark inner workings of Mel Gibson's mind.
00:52:15.000
Remember Trump kept calling Jeb Bush low energy?
00:52:18.000
I was laying on the couch going, that's fucking me he's talking about.
00:52:21.000
I'm laying on the couch and I hear about somebody dying in an avalanche and I watch shit on TV and I laugh because I would never fucking be dropped off in a helicopter at the top of a mountain.
00:52:34.000
Well, the one person he's never called anybody anything is Nancy Pelosi and people are like, why hasn't he come up with a nickname for her yet?
00:52:46.000
That'll cost him 2020. Greg Fitzsimmons had a joke about that.
00:52:49.000
He's like, it's countdown until Trump calls Hillary a cunt.
00:52:59.000
What kind of a nickname, if you were going to help him, like if he hired you?
00:53:04.000
I need a solid Republican comic to help me with my one-liners.
00:53:09.000
Well, I call her on my show, I refer her to the leathery, nippled.
00:53:16.000
I think she was pretty good looking when she was back in her day.
00:53:44.000
Yes, I do, but she represents the little people, Joe.
00:53:50.000
You know, she has fucking walls around her mansion.
00:53:53.000
Meanwhile, people are laying their own faces in San Francisco.
00:53:56.000
Well, that Laura Loomer chick, the chick that handcuffed herself to Twitter, she hopped Nancy's fence and started setting up a migrant camp on Nancy's lawn.
00:54:12.000
I would say to Nancy, I'd be outside the house going, this fence is immoral.
00:54:18.000
I always think, the wall's stupid when we have machine guns and tanks.
00:54:31.000
But seriously, I love how we rule out lethal force as far as protecting our border.
00:54:39.000
So, okay, it's too medieval to pick somebody off as they're climbing.
00:54:49.000
With a woman and her baby trying to come over here for a while?
00:55:01.000
Send them back to where the fuck they came from.
00:55:04.000
Do you have no sympathy for those folks that are trying to come over here?
00:55:15.000
At the turn of the century, like 1902, 1903. They should have stayed in Italy.
00:55:34.000
I know you're joking around, but I seem a little bit more dour than previous conversations we've had.
00:55:46.000
Trump came along and I said, I can say this shit.
00:55:52.000
I had a great bit about immigration, how it was like having a big party, but you had to contribute to the party.
00:55:57.000
The Irish brought the booze, the Italians brought the food.
00:56:04.000
And the Mexicans said, fuck it, we'll clean up afterwards.
00:56:12.000
No, look, I defend Latinos all the time on my show.
00:56:18.000
And when you watch the news and you see a lot of people dying, you know, fighting for us, a lot of Latino names in there.
00:56:30.000
But I don't think you should be labeled a bigot if you believe in securing the borders and it's not immoral.
00:56:39.000
Well, you know how they're bringing that over there?
00:56:48.000
They said 8 out of 10 cargo ships never get checked.
00:56:54.000
I was talking to a guy who was a longshoreman about that.
00:56:56.000
He's like, they don't know what the fuck's in those things.
00:57:05.000
They call me up and say, that's not a bad idea.
00:57:17.000
I did a show, came off stage, went into the green room for a few minutes, and then came back out, and I was standing to the left of the stage.
00:57:26.000
And I don't always shake hands and do all that shit after the show.
00:57:33.000
But some people started coming up to me and shaking hands and taking pictures.
00:57:36.000
And this guy approaches me, sort of looked like you a little bit, stands to my right.
00:57:48.000
He's like, yeah, I enjoyed the show, but my daughter wanted to punch you in the face.
00:57:52.000
He didn't even finish the word face, and I get suckered from this.
00:57:55.000
I didn't even know she was in the fucking room.
00:58:05.000
I could feel the eye closing immediately, you know?
00:58:09.000
This is how good my instincts were, even when I was in shock.
00:58:15.000
He didn't jump in and go to his daughter, what are you doing?
00:58:24.000
He was complicit in it, but I'm still pursuing it.
00:58:36.000
Meanwhile, there was a table of black people, Dominican.
00:58:45.000
Even a friend of mine who's seen me a million times, because you weren't even being that political that night.
00:58:49.000
She had Birkenstocks on and, you know, bipolar.
00:58:59.000
But I said, you just fucking said, no, I didn't, man.
00:59:07.000
You weaponized your bipolar daughter, is what you did.
00:59:09.000
I believe they sat down at the table before they left the house.
00:59:21.000
So, I'm going to work for those kettlebells before I leave here, and then I'm going to find this motherfucker.
00:59:24.000
I'm going to get you on a bike and get you to burn off some energy.
00:59:38.000
But yeah, so the fucking, you had the funniest, this is what's funny about it.
00:59:42.000
For years, people tell me to, you know, keep your temper in check, blah, blah, blah, you know, you'll fuck up your career, you don't, blah, blah, blah.
00:59:49.000
After this happened, they're all going, why didn't you hit her back?
00:59:53.000
You texted me like the next day, or that night, I can't remember, and you said, you go, This made me laugh for five minutes.
01:00:00.000
You go, Joe goes, I thought Joe was going to go, good thing you didn't hit her back.
01:00:03.000
Joe goes, I would have fucking leg whipped her.
01:00:05.000
Which made me laugh so hard because she's this frail thing.
01:00:08.000
And if you leg whipped her, you would have taken her legs clear off like a helicopter blade.
01:00:21.000
The real problem is like someone could really damage...
01:00:48.000
I'm not shocked, especially if you didn't know it was coming.
01:00:52.000
I hope I wouldn't have done what I think I would do.
01:00:59.000
When you get hit and then you immediately respond.
01:01:03.000
Because, look, you've seen that video of that giant 6'5 guy who punched that 11-year-old girl in the face?
01:01:09.000
Well, she definitely shouldn't have walked up to him with her fists up, and she definitely shouldn't have pushed him first, but he definitely shouldn't have punched her in the face, his big, giant fucking guy.
01:01:25.000
You don't want to go into that reptilian part of your brain, either, that just responds to being assaulted.
01:01:34.000
I saw you, remember that clip years ago, you in the parking lot at the comedy store arguing with some bride.
01:01:45.000
I was nice to that lady for a long time until she's finally telling me she's going to hit me with her cigarette.
01:01:56.000
I was watching and going, what's going to happen next?
01:01:57.000
It's just so stupid that people think they can get away with things like that.
01:02:02.000
If you were alone in a parking lot with that girl, and she punched you in the face like that...
01:02:12.000
If we had it, I could have fucking knocked her the fuck out.
01:02:18.000
But that's not the world we're living in right now.
01:02:21.000
You showed amazing restraint in not hitting her back.
01:02:40.000
There's a kid, a black kid walking down the street and some black neighbor and he's rapping or some shit and this black kid walks up from behind like in a wife beater and winds up from his asshole with an open hand.
01:02:52.000
It would blow your ears out if you had the headphones.
01:02:58.000
And that's why I was laughing after the incident.
01:03:00.000
People I know who've been telling me, you know, cool or whatever, you should keep your...
01:03:05.000
They were all like, yeah, shut up, fucking body slap.
01:03:12.000
I was so proud of myself for once that I was, you know, I was the adult in the room.
01:03:17.000
And I, you know, I know in the times we're living in, It wouldn't matter the circumstance.
01:03:30.000
If somebody punches you and you punch them back, I don't know what the fucking rules are about that.
01:03:37.000
That would have been a real problem, because she's small.
01:03:54.000
The DA was a woman in that county, and now she's off the case for some reason.
01:04:02.000
It should be assault or aggravated or something, but of course you can't go, because if you don't get that, I can't sue her civilly.
01:04:10.000
At least that's the logic they were telling me.
01:04:12.000
So they're trying to get her with second-degree harassment, and now there's a new woman on the case, and she said, They're making her go to, you know, anger management because she has mental issues.
01:04:34.000
So is your lawyer's decision to not pursue it that way?
01:04:37.000
First of all, nobody wanted to take the case because I'm fine.
01:04:43.000
They're like, your sight's not fucked up, you're not in a wheelchair, you're not, but yeah.
01:04:52.000
But I found a guy, this guy Andrew Funk, who's a lawyer, who was a Marine.
01:04:57.000
And I said, he contacted me and he put me in touch first with a Russian woman who took about three of my calls and she got tired because there was no money involved.
01:05:07.000
And he hooked me up with another guy, another lawyer who right now I'm dealing with.
01:05:14.000
Yeah, they were all right up front that if there's no money involved and you're not permanently, you're not going to, you know.
01:05:31.000
I'm not looking for money, but it's her father that really pisses me off.
01:05:37.000
Like 20, 21. Goes to school in upstate New York.
01:05:47.000
I think he actually used her as a weapon that night.
01:05:49.000
It seems like it would be way harder to prove that he was complicit than it would be to prove that she punched you.
01:05:59.000
She ran up into the lobby, which is normally where you take pictures with fans, and she put her head on the table and was crying after she realized what she'd done or whatever.
01:06:10.000
You know, they took her to like a psychiatric hospital.
01:06:13.000
So they're saying, well, you know, so I just want to make an example of her.
01:06:18.000
I don't, I'm not looking for, but, you know, that's ridiculous.
01:06:30.000
Well, give me a kick that would just hurt her ovaries.
01:06:59.000
Somebody actually hit you, and you didn't hit them back.
01:07:04.000
Do you ever get into it with a fan or somebody in the audience?
01:07:09.000
One time at the comic store, a guy threw a drink at me.
01:07:36.000
It was probably 2003, 2004. But he knows who you are, and he knows you're...
01:07:50.000
People weren't getting famous or things like that.
01:07:52.000
He's just a drunk asshole who was interrupting comedy.
01:07:55.000
And the comedy store back then had zero protection.
01:08:09.000
And especially if you get crazy people that are drinking, weird stuff can happen.
01:08:16.000
It's just, you know, people that don't have respect for performers, too.
01:08:19.000
They don't have respect for what you're doing, that it's difficult.
01:08:22.000
And if they disagree with you, they think they're disagreeing, even if it's just a joke.
01:08:30.000
And they've just no regard for the forum that you're in, the fact that there's hundreds of other people that are there to see you.
01:08:36.000
It's about their mind and their selfish notion that they want to get out right away.
01:08:42.000
And they have no idea how little it takes to throw off the balance of the room.
01:08:49.000
Just telling somebody to shut up, and all of a sudden, like, you're the bad guy.
01:08:52.000
And a lot of times, it's somebody right up front, so they can't hear.
01:08:56.000
And then it looks like you're just scolding somebody for no reason.
01:09:03.000
Somebody farts in the 52nd row, I can hear it, or whatever.
01:09:10.000
Yeah, well, you know, you're tuning into the crowd.
01:09:19.000
You read their faces and whatnot, and I'm really good at it.
01:09:22.000
And if I see one person laughing out of 600, I'm not laughing.
01:09:31.000
Well, after about 12 clubs, I said, listen, you've got to stop doing that.
01:09:40.000
Now, I had a brawl breakout that had nothing to do with me at Gotham a couple years ago.
01:10:04.000
There's a girl in the middle with her fists up like she took three fucking Tybo classes.
01:10:09.000
And she takes a swing and hits one of the bouncers.
01:10:13.000
I watch this other bouncer come across the room.
01:10:26.000
But these broads, this is what this feminist movement has taken them.
01:10:29.000
Every time you see a fight at a football game, the stands is women involved and shit.
01:10:35.000
I'm sorry, but legislation, you can't fucking legislate the DNA out of us.
01:10:43.000
A lot of fucking broads think they can duke it out now?
01:10:45.000
Well, there are a bunch that have a delusional idea.
01:10:48.000
Yeah, they've seen too many Wonder Woman movies.
01:10:52.000
Well, there's a lot of people in general that think they could go around punching people.
01:10:55.000
Like, how about all these Antifa dorks that are starting fights?
01:11:01.000
They're starting fights with people and they have zero idea how to fight.
01:11:06.000
A guy swings at this guy with a bat or with a baton.
01:11:10.000
The guy catches the baton and punches him in the face and KOs him.
01:11:14.000
And his head snaps back and his head bounces off the concrete when he falls down.
01:11:20.000
Like, what the fuck made you think you could just hit a man with a stick because you guys disagree with each other?
01:11:26.000
And you're right, when they interview them after, a lot of times, not even after a fight, but they interview some of these Antifa, they sound almost swishy, some of them.
01:11:40.000
Look, Antifa is just like any other group of people.
01:11:43.000
They give you a community, whether it's a gang, or whether it's a criminal organization, or whatever it is.
01:12:12.000
Because their life has no value outside of that.
01:12:14.000
Well, isn't it weird to you that, look, my parents were hippies, and when I grew up, I always thought that people on the left were peace-loving.
01:12:26.000
But you're seeing now people on the left, like these certain factions of them, not all of them, but people that are calling for violence.
01:12:36.000
Well, they don't want to do it themselves, but they're calling for other people to do it.
01:12:42.000
Like that kid with the MAGA hat, like Reza Aslan wrote, have you ever seen a more punchable face?
01:12:50.000
You know, it's like this extreme lack of empathy for young people, too.
01:12:54.000
Like young people that don't fall in line with their ideas, they don't give a fuck.
01:12:59.000
They're like, fuck that kid, punch him, throw him in jail, lock him up.
01:13:02.000
It's just like, there's a lack of empathy and a lack of thought behind it.
01:13:10.000
And then you've got these Russian accounts that are firing this up on both sides, that are attacking from the left and the right.
01:13:16.000
I think that's a way bigger issue than people think.
01:13:19.000
I think these troll farms and these people that are setting up these fake accounts and just getting people riled up.
01:13:26.000
I think there's a lot of fucking lemmings out there, and a lot of people just fall into these arguments.
01:13:31.000
How many people do you know that get involved in Twitter arguments, and then they stew with those arguments all day?
01:13:41.000
If someone can get you involved in that, like if the Russians can get a group of dummies involved in that kind of dispute, they could literally change the way people are interacting with each other.
01:13:52.000
They're making the interactions more aggressive, more violent.
01:13:59.000
I think there's a polarization between the left and the right, period.
01:14:05.000
Yeah, this thing that I was reading, or listening to, rather, this Sam Harris podcast, very fucking interesting, because they're talking about what we actually know about the data and where it's coming from and how these people are doing this and how they're setting these things up.
01:14:20.000
Yeah, that guy, the comic that you and I talked about...
01:14:24.000
Again, that clip of this Russian who's a former KGB guy who defected to this country, explaining how it works.
01:14:35.000
And what he was saying, this is 30-something years ago, 35 years ago, is going down exactly the way he explained it.
01:14:44.000
This idea that Trump's working with him is fucking silly.
01:14:49.000
I don't think he's working with them to undermine democracy, but I definitely think they've got some business dealings.
01:15:03.000
I'm not saying it's illegal, but I don't think that he was honest about that.
01:15:07.000
He said, I don't do any dealings with Russia, I don't have any business with Russia, and he definitely did.
01:15:21.000
Well, maybe impeachment, but I don't even know what they get him, high crimes and misdemeanors.
01:15:29.000
To talk about building a tower in Moscow is not illegal, or to have business.
01:15:41.000
No, you can go to a million different websites.
01:15:43.000
Well, I know, but which ones are telling the good independent website?
01:15:45.000
We just established that the fucking social media tilts left, so.
01:15:51.000
We're not talking about pulling up social media pages.
01:15:57.000
I don't have at my disposal all the different times that he lied, but it's a lot.
01:16:02.000
So what do you think is going to happen to him?
01:16:08.000
Look, I'm not claiming to be any sort of an expert in legal proceedings.
01:16:22.000
I always go to Dershowitz because he's a fucking lib.
01:16:24.000
Trump averaged 15 inaccuracies in mistruths a day in 2018. Almost triple the rate from a year before.
01:16:38.000
No, because I don't know who's making that claim.
01:16:45.000
That it just made up the fact that he lies a lot?
01:16:53.000
It says, Washington Post, who they hate, Jeff Bezos, said the president made 1,989 such claims in 2018. By the last day of 2018, 2017. That's my point.
01:17:15.000
But you could go back with Hillary and fucking count.
01:17:18.000
You could go to Fox News and then pull up an article of how many times Hillary was inaccurate.
01:17:26.000
Yeah, when someone talks about something, and instead of refuting it with facts, they go, yeah, well, what about Hillary?
01:17:42.000
Okay, well, that's just Jamie pulled up the Independent.
01:17:53.000
I think the Clinton Foundation's a fucking fully illegal organization.
01:17:57.000
I think they rigged the DNC. I think they rigged the primaries against Bernie.
01:18:04.000
No, I'm not saying you are, but when's the last time somebody made a statement like that?
01:18:09.000
And said this many inaccuracies when Bill Clinton was in office.
01:18:16.000
But first of all, when Bill Clinton was in office, they weren't...
01:18:26.000
And they're saying he lies thousands and thousands of times.
01:18:31.000
First of all, you know, I like to know the definition of a lie.
01:18:40.000
I'm sure sometimes when you're talking that much...
01:18:57.000
Joe, would you argue that they haven't been trying to take him down since he came down that fucking escalator?
01:19:10.000
The fake dossier, Christopher Steele, that they used to get the Pfizer application.
01:19:40.000
This is as big a story as anything Trump has done.
01:19:49.000
You had to get an application to the FISA courts.
01:19:55.000
Christopher Steele, who's a British guy, had connections in Russia.
01:19:59.000
Remember when they said Trump was at a hotel and watching girls peeing on each other?
01:20:07.000
They used that in their application to get a FISA warrant to spy on Trump.
01:20:24.000
That's the biggest story as Trump, you know, lying about the number of people at his inauguration.
01:20:29.000
I want to know a lie from Trump that's equal in power as like when Obama said, you know, lied about health care, that you could keep your health care and all that.
01:20:41.000
Give me an example of Trump with that big of a lie.
01:20:51.000
I'm just saying they start to count it when Trump took over.
01:20:58.000
Like, look, we just showed you all the numbers of the Washington Post provider.
01:21:02.000
So, if I give you another example, you're going to say, oh, that's from this, or that's from that.
01:21:10.000
We've gotten more done than any other administration, okay?
01:21:35.000
This is NBC. Oh, the NBC! Okay, NBC. Okay, so everything is bad.
01:21:41.000
Look, man, I'm just reading what's in front of me.
01:21:53.000
Are you going to tell me you don't know that the mainstream media hates Trump?
01:21:59.000
Because I want to know whether or not they are saying...
01:22:06.000
It says Trump later said that he intended the UN moment to garner a laugh that has repeated this claim seriously since.
01:22:14.000
Okay, so he says that my administration has accomplished more than almost any administration in the history of the country.
01:22:24.000
Right, and people were laughing when he said that.
01:22:26.000
So he was saying that he meant to say it as a laugh.
01:22:30.000
There are varying measures of success, but it's not true that his administration has been more successful than any other administration in history.
01:22:37.000
When it comes to legislation, Trump has signed plenty of bills in his first two years as president, but Barack Obama in his first two years has significantly more.
01:22:46.000
I mean, I'm sure there's many, many other things that you can keep going over and over again.
01:22:51.000
I'm not saying he's not a bullshitter, but I'm just saying all of a sudden they keep score.
01:22:55.000
Because it's a fun thing to keep score because he lies so much.
01:23:00.000
Who is keeping score when fucking Hillary was Secretary of State?
01:23:03.000
Well, it's a different thing when someone's Secretary of State.
01:23:06.000
And I don't know how much she lied as opposed to how much he lied.
01:23:10.000
About her fucking server and about the Steele dossier.
01:23:14.000
That is getting undercovered like nobody's been...
01:23:39.000
Since when do you get afraid of an emotional guy?
01:23:43.000
But you're acting as if I'm against you, and I'm not.
01:23:48.000
You're not against me, but I'm just saying to call Trump a bigger lie than every other politician is an exaggeration.
01:24:01.000
I think they're accustomed to doing that, but I think the way he lies is unusual.
01:24:17.000
Although he did do a lot in his first couple years.
01:24:25.000
Would you agree that as you get older you become more conservative?
01:24:41.000
What do they say about if you're young and conservative, you have no soul?
01:24:45.000
No heart, and if you're old and liberal, you have no mind.
01:24:52.000
That's true, but I could always detect the bullshit.
01:24:55.000
I mean, I remember watching CNN in an airport when I first started comedy, and that's like 1988, and getting excited at some of the shit.
01:25:03.000
Well, it's interesting because I don't disagree with you on everything, and I love you as a person.
01:25:11.000
But yet, you and I here get a little heated talking about this stuff.
01:25:22.000
I would never leave here going, I don't want to do that show again.
01:25:31.000
What I'm saying is, I'm just using it as an example of how divisive politics are.
01:25:42.000
A lot of people are afraid of bad vibes and bad feelings.
01:25:47.000
But this is one of the things that makes people toe the line.
01:26:23.000
It's very interesting how you sort of adopt, not you, but people, sort of adopt a whole group of things when you decide you're a Republican or you decide you're a Democrat.
01:26:35.000
I don't, but see, I don't think I fall into that.
01:26:54.000
I don't want to say pro-choice, but I'm not pro-life.
01:26:58.000
One of the big reasons is, like, I got a dad who's dying of Alzheimer's, watching him.
01:27:04.000
If I could kill him tomorrow and put him out of his misery, I would.
01:27:15.000
Is it like taking a teenage girl over state lines?
01:27:18.000
No, there was a girl who was dying of cancer who went to Oregon for that very reason.
01:27:34.000
Look, man, the idea that you're supposed to just keep staying alive until your fucking heart stops beating when you're in horrible pain, it's evil.
01:27:47.000
I had to put him down because he couldn't walk anymore.
01:27:53.000
They actually came to my house, actually, and they put him down.
01:27:56.000
Sad shit, but you can't do that for a 98-year-old man who's falling apart.
01:28:07.000
All the rights you go out the window, that should be your first right.
01:28:11.000
So that's why I couldn't be like pro-life or whatever.
01:28:16.000
And I got girls pregnant when I was younger, and I was glad there was a Planned Parenthood, whatever it was.
01:28:28.000
But in showbiz, Joe, you know how it is in showbiz, because it's a pretty liberal business.
01:28:34.000
If you're right on two of ten issues, you're like a fucking Nazi.
01:28:45.000
Well, you can't call me alt-right because I'm pretty left-wing on most things.
01:28:57.000
You have me on to, you know, your listeners probably, you know, like, you're like, listen to this guy.
01:29:03.000
That should be a feather in your cap and they're going to hold that against you.
01:29:09.000
You know, it's not rational, but again, it's people trying to have an effect on you.
01:29:17.000
They're trying to make some waves, trying to do something.
01:29:19.000
They're writing blogs or creating videos, but they're doing it to try to put pressure on you.
01:29:32.000
It's disconcerting when it's happening to you, but when you step back and look at it, it's interesting.
01:29:37.000
It's like these systems are opposing each other, and they're trying to figure out where the weaknesses are and how to push to affect the other side.
01:29:56.000
What's the place where they go to meet every year?
01:30:02.000
That was one of my favorite books, The Truth About the Bilderberg Group.
01:30:06.000
And what goes on there and the powerful people that meet.
01:30:10.000
And people always say, there's probably ten guys in a room that run the whole fucking...
01:30:18.000
Until then, I'll stay in the left-right fight and have fun.
01:30:21.000
The idea is that there's ten guys that control everything and they don't give a fuck if it's left or right.
01:30:40.000
They write a sitcom script that lasts for 15 years with plot points.
01:30:53.000
I used to sit at that table at the Comedy Cellar.
01:30:56.000
Me and Patrice yelling at each other about racial shit.
01:31:00.000
Tough Cry was a great fucking show, but I really am worried that you couldn't have a show like that today.
01:31:06.000
Now, let me ask you, and I'm not taking left, right, but who would be to blame for that?
01:31:11.000
That's why I lean right, and I think, and you do in some areas, you're an artist, you're a stand-up.
01:31:20.000
I cannot vote with a party that is for censorship.
01:31:28.000
Did we ever find out what's going on with Dennis Prager?
01:31:36.000
I don't agree with him on a lot of things, but he seems like a very nice guy and I like Adam.
01:31:43.000
He's bringing a lawsuit that they think it's going to go a long way because they were labeling his show as hate speech.
01:31:50.000
Maybe it's back up or whatever, but I know that story.
01:31:53.000
There's a real concern that the ideologies behind these tech companies all go in one direction, and they have the overwhelming control of the narrative because of the fact that they're all...
01:32:05.000
Where we're getting all of our information, most people are getting it on their phones.
01:32:09.000
Most people are getting a lot of their media on their phones.
01:32:13.000
Netflix said something like 50% of the people that watch my special watch it on a phone.
01:32:20.000
So all this stuff is coming from these tech companies.
01:32:23.000
Doesn't that kind of bother you that it's the phone?
01:32:26.000
Because when I hear that, not that it matters with my specials, but...
01:32:31.000
When I picture somebody watching something on the phone, you don't have their full attention.
01:32:35.000
As opposed to sitting in front of their computer or the TV. They kind of bug you.
01:32:39.000
You put all that work into it, and they're on the subway watching it.
01:33:10.000
It says if I leave at 3, it's going to take four hours.
01:33:21.000
I just drove there last week for Brendan Sharp's special.
01:33:25.000
It took me five and a half hours to get down there.
01:34:13.000
Anyways, fucking hairy, thick-ankled girls who can't get laid and they turn their anger.
01:34:22.000
And I've talked to almost two of them in the last 40 years.
01:34:29.000
If you leave right now, you get there an hour before the show.
01:34:35.000
What I'm nervous about, and I'm just being honest...
01:34:38.000
What I'm nervous about is that it's going to get exceedingly longer in the next hour.
01:34:44.000
Do you understand it's making me nervous that you're nervous?
01:34:47.000
Because I was the one who was going to have to get out of here a little early.
01:34:50.000
I thought you were going to go, you'll be fine.
01:34:52.000
Dude, I got down to San Diego on Saturday night.
01:34:59.000
The fumes from the highway because everything was stop and go the whole way.
01:35:03.000
You still might want to try to catch a flight if you can.
01:35:09.000
Run the Jewels is the only thing that saved me.
01:35:20.000
The real Americans live in the middle, don't they?
01:35:38.000
Because some people are happy that someone's bucking the trend.
01:35:43.000
But that's how left-wing and that fucking stupid dip turned into.
01:35:46.000
Bobby Slayton could have run for mayor of San Francisco, right?
01:35:53.000
They had me at the punchline twice a year for like three years.
01:36:02.000
People always say, I bet you you killed down south in Atlanta.
01:36:05.000
No, those people, they all have guilt complexes about being racist and bigots, so when you do something off-color, they're laughing under their cowboy hats.
01:36:17.000
They don't have, I don't know, my sarcasm's almost too Midwest for me.
01:36:33.000
Artie Lang got in trouble for fucking doing black jokes there.
01:36:40.000
So Artie Lang got in trouble there, so you're like, oh, scratch that one off the list.
01:36:44.000
A black bouncer complained because he did a black joke.
01:37:05.000
I'm doing this to cover the cost of coming out here tonight.
01:37:09.000
And I'm doing Ventura Harbor Comedy Club because I... Oh, that's a good spot.
01:37:26.000
Well, don't make it sound like I'm standing in the kitchen.
01:37:34.000
I'm not scared to work at a Chinese restaurant.
01:37:38.000
So Comedy Palace, I'm counting on it because I did no radio.
01:37:42.000
A bunch of girls are polishing their knuckles right now.
01:38:36.000
I was watching Bob Newhart, and all of a sudden I was in this fucking show, and it was in Black and Wife, and my wife was not my wife, and my house was not my house.
01:38:50.000
They're doing horrible things to people out here.
01:38:52.000
But now they have new rules where each edible has to be 10 milligrams, which is doable.
01:39:06.000
I went into a bar in New York, and the bartender pushed it on me.
01:39:13.000
And the problem was, I had already had a couple drinks, so I couldn't tell, but I slept good when I took it.
01:39:20.000
Yeah, some of it has a little bit of THC in it, but it's very little.
01:39:23.000
Most of it is very little, but it's really good for your joints and for aches and pains and inflammation and stuff like that.
01:39:44.000
I haven't been to these places in a while, but yes.
01:39:49.000
And some of the jokes that make people cringe elsewhere were getting rounds of applause.
01:39:58.000
Anytime I said Jew, just, you know, not in a hateful way.
01:40:02.000
Maybe you say Jew and it's not in a hateful way.
01:40:14.000
I said, I hear people saying, yeah, he's a Jew or whatever, and nobody gets mad and stuff.
01:40:18.000
Because in Boston, if somebody said, yeah, that fucking Jew.
01:40:50.000
I don't know the full story, but that was one of the greatest clubs ever.
01:41:29.000
It's not what people think of when they think of Houston.
01:41:36.000
There's a lot of cool shit going on in Houston.
01:41:42.000
People always go, you must kill in Atlanta and shit.
01:41:45.000
They're PC. Cosmopolitan areas, for the most part.
01:41:54.000
But some of the stuff you think would kill, you know, it's like, even for us down here.
01:42:03.000
But, you know, Cosmopolitan areas is more, you know.
01:42:12.000
If you didn't live in New York, where would you live?
01:42:21.000
If I could be up there with fucking Ben and Jerry, knocking on Bernie's door.
01:42:33.000
My brother lived outside of Dallas and he loved it.
01:42:43.000
Folks, you should see the place where you're doing Joe's show.
01:43:03.000
There's something about being around mountains.
01:43:09.000
There's an actual thing that happens to people when you're faced with immense natural beauty that it diminishes your ego and yourself and it puts people in a more spiritual perspective.
01:43:27.000
It's like the best looking art you could ever see.
01:43:29.000
It's like a gorgeous mountain with some green hills and the sun coming out of the clouds.
01:43:33.000
It's as good to look at as anything that's ever existed.
01:43:40.000
But when I see stuff like that is when I get kind of...
01:43:56.000
Can you imagine if I took these and did the show before?
01:44:11.000
I don't want to be giggling in the car on the way down, throwing up on myself.
01:44:17.000
I want to get out of here before it takes effect.
01:44:19.000
It's going to get me in a fucking, some type of scissors lock.
01:44:24.000
It would make people mellow the fuck out, right?
01:44:31.000
The problem is you forget, you take it sometimes.
01:44:33.000
You know, like an hour and a half later, like, why am I so weak?
01:44:37.000
Yeah, I don't want to be that far in my own head.
01:44:47.000
I should go down there on the raft like everybody else does.
01:44:53.000
I am so nervous that you get nervous about me making my show.
01:44:56.000
Yeah, I think we're going to get you out of here in about 15 minutes.
01:45:07.000
Ways will put you on some weird fucking funky backcountry routes that'll cut 20 minutes out of it.
01:45:28.000
Maybe I'll have one of those guys at my show tonight.
01:45:30.000
People have said to me, like, where would you live?
01:45:40.000
When you say that, does that when they throw you into the alt-right adjacent category?
01:45:47.000
I mean, the American flag behind me probably contributes to that, too.
01:45:58.000
You've been paying attention to that expression.
01:46:15.000
He was on a show, I think it was in Montreal, and he had dreadlocks on.
01:46:22.000
And it was this, he's apparently gender fluid, which I guess means...
01:46:28.000
Yeah, you can go back and forth between being a man and a woman, but he does have dreadlocks.
01:46:31.000
And they kicked him off the show because he's a white guy with dreadlocks.
01:46:36.000
And one of the phrases they used was about decolonizing specific hairstyles.
01:46:43.000
And taking them away from white people and giving them back to the people.
01:46:49.000
Oh, that's sort of appropriation is what they're accusing me of.
01:46:54.000
I'd like to go with dreads as a 57-year-old Italian guy.
01:47:04.000
Colin Quinn says I should wear a black turtleneck with yellow lightning bolts and call myself Don Corrado.
01:47:40.000
It's right around the corner from the Comedy Cellar.
01:47:48.000
Colin was, of course, quick enough and smart enough to say, I'm using this every night to work shit out.
01:48:22.000
The fact that you do an hour is very attractive.
01:48:28.000
Because guys are just hopping around like that.
01:48:31.000
When I lived in New York, I could never afford to live in the city.
01:48:35.000
So I lived in New Rochelle, and when I did gigs, I was like, well, I could work in town and do 10 minutes or 15 minutes, or I could just go on the road and do a gig in Connecticut or do a gig in Jersey and make actual money.
01:48:48.000
So even when I lived in New York, I hardly ever worked in New York.
01:48:53.000
I used to, you know, I used to go to the comedy cell every night, but Louis made that place world famous.
01:48:59.000
And it's not, it used to be a room where you could work shit out and take your time, but now it's, you know, it's a fucking tourist.
01:49:05.000
It's packed, it's still a great club, but I feel like, you know, grow that.
01:49:09.000
I don't want to go on stage unless I'm doing at least...
01:49:17.000
15 minute sets, that's why I still do the Fat Black Pussycat, which is such a great thing.
01:49:30.000
You know, it always looks bigger from a picture.
01:49:44.000
The store is 70 people upstairs, so it's basically the same.
01:50:03.000
And that's the only one I really do in the city.
01:50:08.000
I'd rather go to Governor's or somewhere else and do some real time.
01:50:13.000
The other thing about doing clubs where there's a lot of people on, where you're only doing 15 minutes, the good thing about it is that it's not your crowd.
01:50:22.000
So you have to make people laugh that are there just to see comedy.
01:50:29.000
They develop their crowd, and then they kind of lose their edge.
01:50:36.000
Last time I saw you on stage, I walked into Caroline's.
01:50:39.000
I was just in town for something, and you were on stage.
01:50:44.000
And you were doing some fucking joke about Katrina.
01:50:46.000
A joke about Katrina that they spelled help wrong.
01:50:51.000
You know how many people die because they couldn't spell help?
01:50:54.000
Guy looking down from a helicopter and says, HEP. Yeah.
01:50:56.000
I said, if you want HEP, just step in that water you're standing there.
01:51:02.000
I'm like, Nick is just still swinging from the hip the same way.
01:51:07.000
That stage is still one of my favorites in the country.
01:51:12.000
Do you know the problem with Carolines, though, is when they reduce the stage down to the size of a fucking shoebox?
01:51:20.000
But on a Tuesday or Wednesday night with like 60, 70 people in there?
01:51:26.000
I was so comfortable because I played it so much when I first moved to New York.
01:51:32.000
I wrote half specials on that stage by doing like Tuesday nights for a year.
01:51:45.000
I did some little place up in Canada, Niagara Falls, the corner comedy club.
01:51:51.000
Shitty tables and, you know, fucking just cheesy.
01:51:56.000
Well, when a place is big, then it becomes a show.
01:52:06.000
Yeah, that's one of the reasons why Ari, when he does the store, he'll sign up for like late night and he'll get on like at 1245 or some shit like that and there's 20 people there.
01:52:18.000
Because if you do your act in front of 20 people, you know what sucks.
01:52:33.000
It takes four couples who are paying attention.
01:52:38.000
You can kind of song and dance your way through a couple of hundred people.
01:52:52.000
It's great to cut out all the horse shit in your act.
01:52:55.000
Yeah, because if there's only 15 people in the room and 7 of them don't like the joke, oh, you feel it.
01:53:00.000
Yeah, the 15, if someone's sitting there with their cross arms, staring you down, like, yikes!
01:53:09.000
I used to hate playing Carolines, and this is ironic, but this is when I had Comedy Central specials and I was kind of hot, and I would sell out Carolines.
01:53:17.000
I would hate it, though, like two shows on a Saturday night, because it's packed, and I know...
01:53:24.000
For every 20 people in a club, there's one asshole.
01:53:26.000
So if there was like 250, you know, somebody do the math.
01:53:32.000
So you have to work fast and tight to keep their attention.
01:53:36.000
As opposed to taking your time on a Tuesday night in front of 60 people, and the real funny comes out.
01:53:41.000
When you say shit in between your proven bits, there's the gold.
01:53:48.000
And you put yourself in that frame of mind, too, when there's only 30 people at midnight or something like that.
01:53:54.000
You're putting yourself in a different frame of mind.
01:54:10.000
But I know damn well if I work as slow as I do in front of 40 or 50 people, in front of 250 or 300, somebody's going to get anxious.
01:54:18.000
That mentality, like you said, when you show up with 50 people, it's almost like fucking around in somebody's living room.
01:54:25.000
And I want that feeling in front of 300 people or 400 people.
01:54:29.000
You know, we were talking about that last night, that like when you do a large theater, it's so much different than doing a club.
01:54:34.000
Even if you do a packed club of 500 people and then you move to a place that's got 5,000 people, it's just a different feeling.
01:54:51.000
You can't hammer the punchlines like you can in a club.
01:54:56.000
You remember Gavin would hit punchline after punchline.
01:55:03.000
Well, if he was doing 10,000 people, those tags would get drowned out in the laughter of all the people around you.
01:55:10.000
I tried tagging when I did my first Tonight Show.
01:55:21.000
But you don't tag like you're in a club, you know?
01:55:24.000
I remember learning that lesson, TV. But you're absolutely right.
01:55:46.000
I mean, because he would tag, like you said, tag a joke 11 times.
01:55:57.000
I think we got a chance to see some guys that are probably some of the best comics of all time and people don't know.
01:56:03.000
You know, I think between Sweeney and Gavin and Lenny and those guys that we saw when they were in their prime in the 80s.
01:56:11.000
When we were coming up, those guys were in their prime and when we were young, we got a chance to see, I think, some of the greatest of all time.
01:56:20.000
Well, the guys at Knicks put them on a contract for a while too, remember?
01:56:28.000
I remember Gav telling me they were making three grand a weekend and not having to leave your city.
01:56:34.000
Making road money and, like you said, some parks on the side.
01:56:46.000
Well, in the long run, it was a problem, but we got to see some crazy fucking comedy.
01:56:50.000
I remember some of those nights at Nick's Comedy Stop, when you watch those guys get, I remember Sweeney killing so hard, you almost wanted to quit comedy.
01:57:01.000
Gavin would, in Boston back then, you know, Don Gavin Show, he would be the host.
01:57:10.000
That was a different thing about Boston, too, right?
01:57:13.000
Like, if you did the Nick DiPaolo show at Nick's Comedy Stop, you would start off the show.
01:57:17.000
And what was crazy, it was great for young comic, but I had to follow Gavin.
01:57:27.000
You had to be able to hold your own, and they talk at 100 miles an hour, plus they're coked up, and they're really funny.
01:57:35.000
They're really funny, and they got heavy Boston accents, and they're big men.
01:57:43.000
I remember a guy, something gold, Ronnie Gold from New York, had just done his first Tonight Show and shit.
01:57:48.000
And he was coming to Knicks for the weekend, and everybody was dropping in.
01:57:51.000
Gavin would do 10. Chance Lang doing all of his guitar, and literally gets a standing ovation.
01:58:01.000
Angry fucking Irish kids with their blonde eyebrows.
01:58:05.000
That was a tough room if you were having a bad set.
01:58:07.000
Well, they would do it to the people on purpose.
01:58:10.000
They would do it to anybody from out of town that had a big attitude and a Hollywood resume.
01:58:23.000
They were like, these guys, we're as funny as them.
01:58:31.000
Dom Herrera went up there like a fucking champ and just rode the wave.
01:58:50.000
Taking the roof off the dump, and I'm like, Dom has to close this.
01:58:54.000
And he's as funny as anybody, but I'm just saying.
01:58:57.000
He goes up there, and he did something self-deprecating.
01:59:03.000
Within a minute and a half, he had them, and there was no drop-off.
01:59:28.000
It's actually, it goes from his shoulder all the way down to his arm.
01:59:48.000
I mean, this shows as powerful as anything out there.
01:59:55.000
I fucking almost started crying halfway out here.
01:59:58.000
I just got a guy next to me sucking on a straw like a six-year-old.
02:00:07.000
Baby behind me screaming like somebody was using the soft spot in his head for a fucking ashtray.
02:00:16.000
I gotta come out here more than once every two years.
02:00:38.000
It streams live for free on Monday and Wednesdays.
02:00:41.000
And I just shot a thing called Stickman in October.
02:00:53.000
And Andrew's partner already sold some stuff to Netflix, so we're hoping.
02:01:24.000
I'm shooting a special in March at Cohoes Hall in New York.
02:01:28.000
I think I'm just going to put that one out there.