The Joe Rogan Experience - August 21, 2019


Joe Rogan Experience #1339 - Everlast


Episode Stats

Length

3 hours and 13 minutes

Words per Minute

177.83295

Word Count

34,384

Sentence Count

3,738

Misogynist Sentences

104


Summary

On this episode of the podcast, we discuss Conor McGregor's recent loss to Khabib Nurmagomedov, how he got to where he is now, and the crazy amount of money he's making. We also talk about how he's going to go down in history as one of the greatest fighters of all time, and why he's probably the best at what he does. We also get into the crazy things he's been doing in the past, and how he might end up being the next big thing in the fight game. And we talk about why he should be the first black man to become a multimillionaire in the UFC, and what it means to him that he's able to do all of the things that he does, and that he doesn't have to go through the typical training and preparation that other fighters go through to get the job done. We finish the episode with some of our favorite moments from the past week, and look forward to what's in store for the future of the UFC and the UFC. Enjoy, and tweet us your thoughts! if you have any thoughts or opinions on any of the topics covered in this episode. Timestamps: 0:00 - Who's the best MMA fighter of all-time? 5:30 - Conor McGregor 8:15 - Who is the best UFC fighter? 9:20 - Canelo Alvarez vs. Dana White vs. Conor McGregor? 11:00 12:00- Canelo vs. Donald Cerrone of the week? 16:00 Conor McGregor vs. 17:00 Canelo and Dana White? 18:00: What's the worst UFC fighter you've ever seen? 19:00 What do you think of a black guy you've seen? 21:40 - Who do you like? 22:10 - What's your favorite UFC fighter of the past decade? 25:00 Who is your favorite MMA fighter? 26:00 How do you feel about Conor McGregor s background? 27:00 Do you think he's the most underrated? 28:00 Is he a good human being? 29:00 Does he have the best chance of winning the next fight? 31:00 Should he have a chance of becoming a billionaire? 32:00 Will he ever stop fighting again? 33:00 Are you going to be a millionaire? 35:00 Why is he going to stop fighting in the next episode?


Transcript

00:00:03.000 What is that thing you say when you clink glasses?
00:00:06.000 Sláinte is like the Irish, you know, salute or, you know, now strovia.
00:00:10.000 It's just the Irish version.
00:00:11.000 Sláinte?
00:00:12.000 Sláinte.
00:00:13.000 Yeah, like S-L-A-I-N-T-E, I believe is how it's spelled.
00:00:18.000 Sláinte.
00:00:20.000 I never knew that.
00:00:21.000 You said it before and I always just let it slide because I didn't want to seem like a dork.
00:00:24.000 You know?
00:00:25.000 I'm probably saying it real...
00:00:27.000 I mean, like, you know, Gaelic is some real harsh...
00:00:30.000 Yeah.
00:00:31.000 Like, vowels and...
00:00:33.000 Gaelic's crazy.
00:00:34.000 It's crazy.
00:00:35.000 Like, I've seen Gaelic names that, like, were spelt insane and it was...
00:00:39.000 Oh, that's pronounced Sean.
00:00:41.000 Like some crazy shit like that.
00:00:43.000 That's a wild, ancient language, right?
00:00:45.000 Yeah, for real, though.
00:00:46.000 I love Irish people, man.
00:00:48.000 I'm fucking fascinated by the wildness of that culture.
00:00:53.000 That's why God made whiskey, you know, so the Irish would never rule the world.
00:00:58.000 When you see a guy like Conor McGregor, that part of what is him is Irish.
00:01:05.000 He's like a pure, brilliant Irish.
00:01:09.000 You know what I'm talking about?
00:01:10.000 For sure.
00:01:10.000 Bulls full, bad motherfucker.
00:01:12.000 Knows how to take a loss.
00:01:13.000 Knows how to take a loss.
00:01:14.000 Takes a loss like a man.
00:01:16.000 And still talks shit.
00:01:18.000 Come right back tomorrow.
00:01:20.000 It's like that guy that you fight, but he loses, but you know you're going to have to fight him tomorrow.
00:01:26.000 Yes.
00:01:26.000 Or as soon as his shit is healed up and the busted up-ness is gone.
00:01:31.000 He's got like $100 million in the bank.
00:01:33.000 He still wants to fight people.
00:01:35.000 Still smacking people at bars.
00:01:36.000 Yeah, that's...
00:01:40.000 What is he doing?
00:01:41.000 It's hard.
00:01:41.000 What is he doing?
00:01:42.000 Don't do that.
00:01:43.000 Don't do that.
00:01:45.000 No, not that.
00:01:46.000 Who knows what the fuck the guy said to him.
00:01:49.000 But it looked like the guy was old as fuck.
00:01:51.000 Someone said he was only 50. That the guy was only 50. Dude didn't fold up, though.
00:01:55.000 He just kind of sat at the bar.
00:01:57.000 Conor didn't really.
00:01:58.000 Yeah, he slacked him.
00:01:58.000 He gave him a smack in the back of the head.
00:02:00.000 Gave him a couple of fingers.
00:02:02.000 He touched him.
00:02:03.000 He did what we call mushed him.
00:02:04.000 He mushed him.
00:02:05.000 Yes.
00:02:06.000 It can kind of be interpreted as hitting, but it really ain't quite a hit.
00:02:10.000 Yeah, when you're a guy like that, you're basically walking around agreeing not to fuck people up.
00:02:14.000 Because you have to kind of agree to not fuck people up.
00:02:17.000 The money he's got, there should be like five guys around him that make sure that never happens.
00:02:21.000 Yeah, but they can't listen to him.
00:02:23.000 Like, if you have a guy like him, he's going to do whatever he wants.
00:02:28.000 Even if there's a bunch of people around him stopping him.
00:02:30.000 You're not going to stop him from doing checks.
00:02:32.000 When he threw that guy's phone down the ground, stomped it in Miami, there was all the bodyguards there.
00:02:37.000 He just did it.
00:02:38.000 He just did it.
00:02:39.000 He's Conor McGregor.
00:02:41.000 He's living like you're supposed to live if you're Conor McGregor.
00:02:44.000 The dance is, don't go to jail, dude.
00:02:46.000 Don't get locked up.
00:02:47.000 And it's also the whole structure of the way things are now as far as entertainment.
00:02:53.000 It's all about eyeballs.
00:02:55.000 Well, he fucking figured it out, man.
00:02:58.000 He figured it out.
00:03:00.000 He figured it out, man.
00:03:02.000 Like, in the most crazy way possible.
00:03:05.000 He figured out how to just blow up the whole system.
00:03:09.000 And you're a guy who has been fighting.
00:03:12.000 I mean, I contacted him on Twitter in, like, 2013. Right?
00:03:17.000 By 2018, he's worth $100 million.
00:03:21.000 Yeah, so quick.
00:03:22.000 Quick.
00:03:23.000 And he called it all the way.
00:03:25.000 And he called it all the way.
00:03:27.000 That's the craziest part.
00:03:28.000 He called it all the way.
00:03:30.000 Like, I'm going to be a billionaire or a multimillionaire.
00:03:34.000 You know what Dana White said to me once about him that's dead on?
00:03:37.000 He said he eats pressure.
00:03:38.000 He said that guy eats pressure.
00:03:40.000 He just eats it.
00:03:41.000 He just goes in there and the more pressure he experiences, the better he can perform.
00:03:46.000 It's true.
00:03:47.000 It's like you look at the Aldo fight.
00:03:49.000 Picture-perfect left-hand knockout.
00:03:51.000 It doesn't get any prettier.
00:03:52.000 The timing, the setup, the patience, the movement, the setting it up, looking for him to leap in, and BANG! Catching him when he's coming in.
00:03:59.000 I'm pretty sure he said exactly what he said he was going to do right before the fight, too.
00:04:03.000 Oh, that's me tweeting him.
00:04:05.000 In January of 2013, I saw his fight in, I think it was Cage Warriors.
00:04:10.000 I think that's the promotion.
00:04:13.000 Cage Wars or Cage Warriors?
00:04:16.000 Why am I fucking that up?
00:04:19.000 Cage Wars.
00:04:20.000 Is there two different ones?
00:04:22.000 There probably is.
00:04:23.000 It's probably a bunch of Cage stuff.
00:04:26.000 But either way, he was fucking people up overseas, and I was like, this kid's for real.
00:04:32.000 He just sees something sometimes.
00:04:34.000 He sees, like, I watch a video, see how a guy moves, and I'm like, Jesus!
00:04:38.000 Some guys just have something, and he had just ridiculous timing.
00:04:42.000 So relaxed in there.
00:04:44.000 Those were fun fights, man.
00:04:46.000 His early days of MMA, he was like, you can go back and watch him, and you go, oh, this guy's gonna be special.
00:04:51.000 He's got a weird sense of timing.
00:04:54.000 He's just very good at understanding where you're at and knowing how to put it on you.
00:04:58.000 He just had me winning the whole Irish thing.
00:05:01.000 That's it.
00:05:01.000 Oh, for sure, man.
00:05:02.000 We built a city.
00:05:05.000 I love it.
00:05:06.000 I love it.
00:05:07.000 Yeah, when he was like, we all fight together.
00:05:09.000 Like, oof.
00:05:11.000 When he's in the room, if he wins a fight and the crowd's filled with 7,000 Irish people, you feel it.
00:05:18.000 You feel goosebumps.
00:05:20.000 It's crazy.
00:05:21.000 You do everything you can to stop just to keep yourself from crying at the beauty of it.
00:05:25.000 This guy standing there in front of thousands of people that have flown overseas to see him fight.
00:05:30.000 It's insane how many people fly over.
00:05:31.000 Dude, it's crazy.
00:05:33.000 They take over the fucking Vegas hotels.
00:05:35.000 Take over!
00:05:37.000 Didn't they shut down like 7th Avenue in front of Madison Square Garden?
00:05:42.000 There's not a fucking fan on earth like Irish fans.
00:05:45.000 They're different.
00:05:46.000 I used to think Brazilian fans were crazy until I saw the Irish fans.
00:05:49.000 They'd take over.
00:05:51.000 The whole Mandalay Bay was taken over by people singing.
00:05:55.000 It was all Irish people.
00:05:57.000 And doing a fair amount of drinking.
00:05:58.000 Oh, fair.
00:06:00.000 More than fair.
00:06:02.000 But just the fact that they can do that, that they can get together and sing the same song, like thousands of them together singing the same song.
00:06:11.000 I remember the first time when we went to Ireland, this House of Pain, and in between songs, they broke into the whole, you know, all the soccer chant stuff.
00:06:21.000 And we were just like, whoa, this is crazy.
00:06:24.000 You know, we never experienced anything like that.
00:06:26.000 They don't do that at the sports events at home back then, not back then at all.
00:06:31.000 That was amazing.
00:06:32.000 Culturally, that soccer shit is real.
00:06:37.000 They have to have Conor fight in Ireland once.
00:06:40.000 He's got to fight in Dublin in a soccer stadium.
00:06:44.000 Fuck yeah, right?
00:06:46.000 Why not?
00:06:47.000 Why not?
00:06:48.000 If he's ever going to fight again, that's why they should do it.
00:06:52.000 I think the idea was that it's more money in pay-per-view if you fight in Vegas.
00:06:57.000 Vegas is worth a lot of money.
00:06:59.000 Doesn't the time have a lot to do with it, too, when they do it on the European thing?
00:07:02.000 They've got to do the whole weird time thing over there so they can accommodate the pay-per-view here.
00:07:07.000 Yeah, it'd be real weird.
00:07:08.000 They'd be fighting at like 4 in the morning.
00:07:10.000 It's always real weird to me when I wake up and there's like a South American fight that happened at noon and I'm like, oh, god, missed!
00:07:16.000 Or Japan, like Ryzen.
00:07:18.000 If you're trying to watch Ryzen, they have it in Japanese time.
00:07:21.000 That's how Pride used to be.
00:07:23.000 We would get up at, like, we would have guys come over my house and we would watch Pride at like 3 o'clock in the morning.
00:07:29.000 Like sometimes they would have them live for some reason.
00:07:31.000 If I'm remembering it correctly...
00:07:33.000 Sometimes they would have them live and sometimes they would have the fights and you knew what happened, but you didn't get to see it for like a couple of weeks.
00:07:40.000 They would delay it in North America for some strange reason.
00:07:44.000 They didn't totally do it live.
00:07:48.000 I was hip to that MMA share thing a long time ago.
00:07:51.000 They always had the bootleg videos.
00:07:53.000 Don't tell anybody.
00:07:54.000 That's like Voldemort.
00:07:55.000 Don't say that.
00:07:56.000 Did I just mess up?
00:07:58.000 I don't know.
00:07:59.000 People get mad.
00:08:00.000 I thought it was gone anyways.
00:08:01.000 That was 10 years ago, dude.
00:08:03.000 Illegal streams.
00:08:04.000 Yeah.
00:08:05.000 Yo, the funny thing was, dude.
00:08:08.000 UFC is gangsters with that.
00:08:10.000 It used to be you could watch those.
00:08:12.000 And then over time, because in Europe, before there was things like Fight Pass and things like that, you couldn't find a pay-per-view if you were stuck over there at 4 in the morning in the middle of somewhere.
00:08:21.000 So you would lean on whatever you could as a fan.
00:08:24.000 But you started seeing them shutting them down.
00:08:29.000 They're gangsters.
00:08:30.000 The UFC are gangsters.
00:08:32.000 Yeah, it's a big money business.
00:08:35.000 People fucking people up.
00:08:36.000 It's impressive, is what it is.
00:08:38.000 It's impressive.
00:08:39.000 It is impressive.
00:08:40.000 There's an army of motherfuckers somewhere going, oh yeah, oh yeah.
00:08:44.000 Still some of it must get through, right?
00:08:46.000 The internet just has stuff that gets through.
00:08:48.000 I don't know.
00:08:48.000 I got the Fight Pass now, so everywhere I go, I got the Fight Pass and you have that little static IP address, so when you are out of the country, that's perfectly normal.
00:08:58.000 You know what's weird?
00:08:59.000 Why aren't they showing...
00:09:01.000 I need to ask the UFC this.
00:09:03.000 Why don't they show the knockouts on their Instagram page?
00:09:08.000 They show when the knockout's over.
00:09:10.000 Have you noticed that?
00:09:11.000 Yeah.
00:09:12.000 I do not understand.
00:09:13.000 I don't understand.
00:09:14.000 Because once everybody knows, they know.
00:09:16.000 Everybody knows, they know.
00:09:17.000 It's not hurting anybody to watch it.
00:09:19.000 Like, it'll just hype up the fight.
00:09:21.000 Is replay business a lot of business?
00:09:23.000 I wonder what the replay buys are.
00:09:25.000 Like, the cats who just missed it and bought the replay.
00:09:27.000 Maybe that factors in.
00:09:28.000 I'm sure.
00:09:29.000 I'm sure.
00:09:29.000 They probably make a nice second round of money on that replay.
00:09:32.000 Right, so how long do you think they should hold off?
00:09:35.000 For like a week?
00:09:36.000 A day or two maybe?
00:09:37.000 Yeah, a week.
00:09:37.000 Tops.
00:09:38.000 A week and then put the highlights on.
00:09:40.000 For sure.
00:09:40.000 Do they do that?
00:09:41.000 Do they ever show?
00:09:42.000 I get this weird impression that they only show like right after the finish.
00:09:46.000 Well, like on Instagram now, no.
00:09:48.000 They'll show entire fights on Instagram now, but old fights.
00:09:51.000 Like old fights, yeah.
00:09:52.000 But I'm pretty sure they showed Stipe just pulling off of DC. Was that the case?
00:09:58.000 That was crazy.
00:09:59.000 My whole phone got blown up because apparently I'm right in the background when that happens.
00:10:04.000 I don't know.
00:10:06.000 I haven't seen it.
00:10:07.000 My phone blew up right then.
00:10:09.000 Dude, that fight was chaos.
00:10:11.000 That fight was chaos.
00:10:11.000 That was fun.
00:10:12.000 I had an amazing time.
00:10:13.000 That fight card was chaos.
00:10:16.000 That was a wild one, man.
00:10:18.000 In Anaheim.
00:10:19.000 It was hard watching DC get hit with those fucking body shots.
00:10:23.000 As soon as he started digging in, it was like, oh wow, something's happening.
00:10:28.000 Dude, Stipe's nasty.
00:10:30.000 He wanted that belt back.
00:10:31.000 The shots he took.
00:10:32.000 Incredible.
00:10:33.000 We were talking about Yoel.
00:10:34.000 The shots Stipe took and just walked through them like...
00:10:37.000 Well, it was crazy because DC managed to put him away with one punch the first time.
00:10:42.000 That he didn't see coming.
00:10:43.000 He didn't see it coming.
00:10:44.000 Everything he got hit with was hard as hell, but he saw it all coming.
00:10:48.000 And he didn't let him get in that little, right in his chest there, because he got that short one on him that last time.
00:10:54.000 That's exactly what happens.
00:10:55.000 If you're not prepared, if you don't think you're going to get punched and you relax for a minute and then you get punched by something you don't see coming, you can get fucked up.
00:11:02.000 And when you're in a fight with a Greco-Roman wrestler of the caliber of DC who knows how to manipulate you, he just manipulated him perfectly into that right hand.
00:11:12.000 It was a beautiful work of art.
00:11:14.000 But he was never able to hit him like that in the second fight as cleanly and have that kind of an effect.
00:11:20.000 The shots he hit him with were pretty good shots, but Stipe ate him.
00:11:23.000 And then you realize, oh, Stipe can take a fucking shot.
00:11:25.000 He just got clipped.
00:11:27.000 He just got caught.
00:11:28.000 He can take a fucking shot.
00:11:29.000 And he was there in the fourth round, which is really impressive.
00:11:33.000 Like, in the fourth round, he was looking good.
00:11:35.000 He recognized as soon as he touched that lever shot that it was...
00:11:39.000 Oh, wow, something happened there.
00:11:41.000 And it hit him.
00:11:41.000 He dug in like four or five straight times, man.
00:11:44.000 You cannot let a guy like that punch you in the lever that many times.
00:11:47.000 I'm sure DC obviously didn't want him to do that, but that's how good Stipe is.
00:11:52.000 Respect to DC, though.
00:11:52.000 Yeah, respect to DC. I love that guy.
00:11:55.000 That was a great fight.
00:11:56.000 He's one of my favorite people.
00:11:58.000 To do commentary with, man, for sure.
00:12:00.000 He's the best.
00:12:01.000 He's so fun.
00:12:02.000 He's hilarious.
00:12:03.000 When Rose Namajunas knocked out Ioannion Jacek, he's like, fuck Rose!
00:12:09.000 Fuck Rose!
00:12:10.000 I never forget that.
00:12:11.000 That is what I love.
00:12:13.000 He's so free that in the middle of this crazy world title fight, he's just DC. He could be himself.
00:12:23.000 He's got a great personality, man.
00:12:25.000 And he's a hell of a fighter, and he was dominating in the first round.
00:12:28.000 Do you think he's going to fight again, probably?
00:12:31.000 I think he's going to want to fight Stipe again, if I guess.
00:12:34.000 If I really guess.
00:12:35.000 I mean, if he wants to do it again, he's going to want to fight Stipe again.
00:12:38.000 Because he's going to want to, I think the way he described it is right that wrong.
00:12:43.000 That he did.
00:12:43.000 He just didn't fight well.
00:12:45.000 He didn't listen to his coroner.
00:12:47.000 I think that's what he thinks.
00:12:49.000 It's like he fought really well in the first round, and then Bob Cook was yelling at him in the second round, keep your damn hands up.
00:12:57.000 He was walking him down, almost disdainfully, walking him down.
00:13:02.000 And I don't know if that was part of strategy to psychologically put up a lot of pressure on Stipe, you know, to try to establish that Stipe's done, that he's the champ now.
00:13:10.000 But it was almost like disdainful.
00:13:12.000 But Stipe survived.
00:13:13.000 And he just was there.
00:13:14.000 And he was there in really good shape in rounds three and rounds four.
00:13:18.000 That was what was really impressive about it.
00:13:20.000 I was amazed.
00:13:21.000 Especially after getting fucked up quite a bit in that first round.
00:13:25.000 I mean, there was a couple times where I thought he was going to be, like, dude was going to get him.
00:13:29.000 Yeah, DC was all over him in that first round.
00:13:32.000 And when he picked him up and dumped him, you're like, Jesus Christ, DC's good.
00:13:36.000 Jesus Christ, he's good.
00:13:37.000 He just didn't maintain it.
00:13:38.000 That's exactly what it was.
00:13:39.000 And then Stipe made the adjustment.
00:13:42.000 And, you know, who the fuck knows?
00:13:44.000 He might decide, you know what?
00:13:45.000 My body doesn't want to do this anymore.
00:13:47.000 I'm done.
00:13:48.000 I know he made a ton of money.
00:13:49.000 And I know he's really good as a commentator.
00:13:51.000 And he'll do that forever.
00:13:53.000 For sure.
00:13:54.000 Or he might want to do it one more time.
00:13:56.000 But then there's always Jon Jones lurking, man.
00:14:00.000 I feel like everybody knows that's the biggest rivalry in MMA. Isn't it?
00:14:08.000 Yeah, I mean, the only thing, if you're going to talk about accolades of Cormier's, he has everything, all those championships, but there's that little asterisk on the light heavyweight belt that he never really got it from John.
00:14:23.000 But that's the weird part about it, right?
00:14:24.000 It's like when you're a champion, but the champion who's the real champion didn't lose it, and then they have an interim champion.
00:14:29.000 Like, what are we doing here?
00:14:31.000 What does happen?
00:14:31.000 Has John never come back and shown that he's still him and hopefully God willing for him keeping all this stuff together?
00:14:40.000 Yeah.
00:14:41.000 It would have been different.
00:14:42.000 If he just kind of faded into the distance, then it changes that narrative.
00:14:46.000 But he came back, and his original thing was like, you ain't that guy.
00:14:51.000 I'm that guy still.
00:14:53.000 Yeah, that's how crazy good John is.
00:14:56.000 Really, that's how crazy good John is.
00:14:57.000 I'd love to see that, though.
00:14:59.000 And the way DC was able to beat Rumble twice.
00:15:02.000 Rumble, to me, was always the scariest guy.
00:15:04.000 That's my dude.
00:15:05.000 Rumble's the scariest guy.
00:15:06.000 That's my dude.
00:15:07.000 He's so ferocious.
00:15:09.000 His punching is so fucking explosive, man.
00:15:11.000 He's just got so much power.
00:15:13.000 When he knocked out Glover to share with one punch, I was like, God...
00:15:18.000 When I first met him, he was a much smaller dude.
00:15:22.000 When he was 3170. Yeah, yeah.
00:15:23.000 He used to work out with some friends of mine that used to work out in this little MMA gym that was off Melrose and La Brea.
00:15:29.000 I think it was called LAMMA at the time or something like that.
00:15:33.000 Before he wound up in Colorado, I think.
00:15:35.000 Dude.
00:15:36.000 I've known that dude a while, man.
00:15:37.000 He's a good dude, man.
00:15:39.000 He's ridiculously powerful.
00:15:40.000 He's a really nice guy.
00:15:40.000 Yeah, he's a good dude.
00:15:41.000 His fucking power is preposterous, though.
00:15:45.000 And then when I seen him come back in on the 205, that's what I was like.
00:15:48.000 Yeah.
00:15:49.000 Just flatlining people at 205. But it was interesting, man.
00:15:53.000 His retirement was one of the most honest.
00:15:58.000 He was happy with it.
00:16:01.000 Because he was like, man, I'm not a fighter.
00:16:02.000 I'm an athlete.
00:16:03.000 I'm just good at this.
00:16:04.000 I was like, wow, that's really, that's interesting.
00:16:09.000 Interesting way to look at it.
00:16:10.000 I think he grows weed now and raises dogs.
00:16:12.000 And like breeds French bulldogs.
00:16:14.000 Good for him.
00:16:14.000 And he's huge.
00:16:15.000 He just did a grappling competition against this guy, Craig Jones, who's this Brazilian jiu-jitsu guy from Australia that's a murderer.
00:16:22.000 He's a leg lock specialist, too, and he caught him in a leg lock.
00:16:26.000 It's crazy to see how big he is.
00:16:28.000 Rumble's like fucking, I don't know, he's gotta be like 260 pounds.
00:16:31.000 Like, no bullshit.
00:16:32.000 He's huge, man.
00:16:34.000 I've seen him, we sat next to a fight, not the last fight I went to, but whatever, the one last fight before that in Vegas.
00:16:40.000 Bro, he looks like a fucking super heavyweight.
00:16:42.000 He's so big, it's ridiculous.
00:16:44.000 He's just not even thinking about losing weight for fighting anymore.
00:16:48.000 I wonder what would happen if he decided to come back as a heavyweight.
00:16:51.000 Like, no bullshit.
00:16:53.000 As a heavyweight, if that guy...
00:16:55.000 I mean, do you know how crazy it would be if that guy wound up winning the heavyweight title?
00:16:59.000 You think of the Rumble career.
00:17:01.000 He wins the ultimate fighter as a 170. Gets all the way up to 185. Can't make 185. Misses weight, right?
00:17:08.000 Misses it for the Vitor Belfort fight, I believe.
00:17:10.000 A big fight.
00:17:11.000 Then he goes up to light heavyweight.
00:17:13.000 Even goes up to heavyweight.
00:17:14.000 Beat Andre Arlovsky in, I think it was the PFL. And I think it really beat him badly, if I remember correctly.
00:17:21.000 He broke his jaw.
00:17:24.000 That was at heavyweight.
00:17:26.000 That was at heavyweight in the PFL. It wasn't in the UFC. And then he comes back to the UFC. Comes back to the UFC as a light heavyweight and just...
00:17:34.000 Slap whining people.
00:17:36.000 Yeah, I remember.
00:17:36.000 You would see him hit people, he'd just go, whoa!
00:17:39.000 That guy.
00:17:39.000 Scary.
00:17:40.000 Timing, too.
00:17:41.000 Excellent timing.
00:17:42.000 You know, it wasn't just power.
00:17:45.000 Rumble Johnson, UFC return, could be on cards if the price is right.
00:17:49.000 Yeah, that was when...
00:17:51.000 This is from recently?
00:17:52.000 Yeah, after his grappling match, I think.
00:17:54.000 Oh, really?
00:17:54.000 Yeah, July, two months ago.
00:17:55.000 Dude, he's so big right now.
00:17:57.000 I would think he would fight heavyweight.
00:17:59.000 Heavyweight.
00:18:00.000 I mean, I really think he's...
00:18:02.000 Him and Stipe.
00:18:03.000 He was torturing his body for so long to make 170. I never saw anybody lose one.
00:18:08.000 Oh my god, 278!
00:18:12.000 He's so big!
00:18:13.000 That's 100 pounds over what he fought.
00:18:16.000 It is a 100 pound gain.
00:18:18.000 That is so crazy.
00:18:20.000 A hundred pounds more than what he weighed in when he won the Ultimate Fighter.
00:18:24.000 That's insane.
00:18:25.000 That's insane.
00:18:26.000 God bless.
00:18:28.000 Oh my god!
00:18:30.000 278. Oh my god.
00:18:32.000 170. Oh my god.
00:18:34.000 He was 170. 170 pound champion.
00:18:38.000 Becomes a 278 pound heavyweight.
00:18:40.000 And it's just like, where did he, how did you do that?
00:18:42.000 Where is it?
00:18:44.000 It's crazy.
00:18:45.000 That guy's power is fucking undeniably preposterous.
00:18:49.000 What do you make of Brock trying to pick a fight with John Bones?
00:18:53.000 Oh, that's so silly.
00:18:55.000 Let's just talk.
00:18:56.000 What I was going to say about Rumble is that even though Rumble was that good and that scary, DC handled him, man.
00:19:02.000 DC ate a hard shot, got him to the ground.
00:19:05.000 That was Rumble when he was 170. He's very thin.
00:19:08.000 Now he's enormous.
00:19:11.000 But DC was the guy who managed to handle that.
00:19:14.000 Yeah, crazy.
00:19:15.000 That's how badass DC is.
00:19:17.000 Seemingly easily was the crazy part.
00:19:19.000 He was the only one that could handle him.
00:19:21.000 I didn't think that was going to go that way.
00:19:22.000 Like I said, that was my dude, so I was rooting heavy for him.
00:19:25.000 Well, DC's a special guy when it comes to wrestling.
00:19:28.000 He's especially talented.
00:19:30.000 And I think wrestlers, they know where they stand in the wrestling food chain.
00:19:35.000 And when you get gripped by a dude like DC, you're like, oh Jesus, this is Olympic caliber wrestling.
00:19:42.000 It's beast mode.
00:19:44.000 He'd just start smashing.
00:19:45.000 And he was able to run his way through the heavyweight division.
00:19:47.000 You've got to realize before he lost his Stipe fight, he'd only lost one round ever at heavyweight, really, arguably.
00:19:53.000 And that was to Josh Barnett.
00:19:54.000 I think that was like one round that he lost on the cards.
00:19:57.000 And Josh Barnett is, you know, a legend.
00:20:00.000 A fucking...
00:20:02.000 The youngest ever UFC heavyweight champion.
00:20:04.000 The youngest ever UFC heavyweight champion, Josh Barnett.
00:20:08.000 Brilliant guy, too.
00:20:09.000 Do you know Josh?
00:20:09.000 Not personally, no.
00:20:11.000 Fucking brilliant guy.
00:20:12.000 Brilliant guy.
00:20:13.000 So that's the last round that DC had ever lost.
00:20:17.000 He lost like one round as a heavyweight.
00:20:19.000 He was just dominating people.
00:20:20.000 With his wrestling and his hand speed, he was just fucking people up.
00:20:23.000 But that's how good Stipe is, man.
00:20:26.000 People slept on Stipe.
00:20:28.000 People thought that DC was going to run him over again like he ran him over the first time.
00:20:32.000 And, you know, I think DC prepared for a long and arduous fight, but Stipe's a big, big man.
00:20:38.000 Big, giant heavyweight man.
00:20:40.000 He's a long, tall dude, a long frame.
00:20:43.000 DC weighed more than him during the fight.
00:20:45.000 I think he weighed like six pounds more than him.
00:20:46.000 Something like that.
00:20:48.000 But it's just built, it's just distributed very differently.
00:20:51.000 But didn't Stephen come in like 20 or 30 pounds less than last time?
00:20:54.000 He came in less, yeah.
00:20:56.000 I don't know if it was 20 pounds, but I think it was, he was like 230 in this fight, and I think DC was 236. So DC came in light, too.
00:21:03.000 He came in lighter than their first fight.
00:21:07.000 But I think, you know, Stipe came in after like a whole year of waiting for this rematch, like trying to figure out if it's ever going to happen.
00:21:15.000 Is DC going to fight Brock Lesnar?
00:21:17.000 And Jesus, you know, it's like he was always waiting.
00:21:20.000 And then finally they gave him the chance to see him.
00:21:23.000 I hate to see DC lose.
00:21:25.000 I hate it.
00:21:25.000 It's hard to watch, man.
00:21:27.000 He's such a nice guy.
00:21:29.000 It's hard as much as I like that guy to see him get hit.
00:21:32.000 It's hard.
00:21:34.000 But you take all that stuff out, and just look at it as two athletes, and what Stipe did was just brilliant.
00:21:39.000 The whipping of that left hook to the body was just textbook, man.
00:21:44.000 Textbook.
00:21:45.000 DC was fighting an amazing fight up until he gassed a little bit, it looked like to me, and the liver shots started happening.
00:21:53.000 It's also, you've got to appreciate the technique.
00:21:55.000 The way Stipe threw that left hook was perfect.
00:21:59.000 I mean, it was just, these are brilliant shots.
00:22:02.000 There's no wasted movement.
00:22:04.000 The technique was pinpoint.
00:22:06.000 I mean, he just rips him in there.
00:22:08.000 And he caught DC standing there.
00:22:11.000 And he just hit him with a hard left to the body.
00:22:14.000 And then, once he realized he could do that more, he just continued what they were doing.
00:22:18.000 And then, he would go do it again.
00:22:20.000 And he got in again.
00:22:21.000 And then, now DC's in a little bit of trouble.
00:22:23.000 And now, what's he going to try to do?
00:22:25.000 Take him down?
00:22:26.000 Like, he's in this spot where he's kind of still standing with him.
00:22:29.000 And he's not down, but he's hurt.
00:22:32.000 He got hit with hard body shots by a big heavyweight.
00:22:37.000 His face was definitely letting it be known.
00:22:39.000 Those are brutal.
00:22:41.000 And then, boom, he starts hitting him up to the head and drops him.
00:22:45.000 Wow.
00:22:46.000 That was super impressive.
00:22:48.000 When you're calling a fight, how often are you looking here?
00:22:52.000 Depends on what I can see.
00:22:54.000 I mean, what you're saying is a monitor.
00:22:56.000 Yeah, it depends on how often I want to see it.
00:22:58.000 If I could just see it.
00:22:59.000 Absolutely.
00:22:59.000 That's why I'm just curious.
00:23:01.000 I'm just saying percentage-wise, if you were to guess, what, about a third of the time you're looking at this and the rest of the time you're probably up here?
00:23:08.000 Yeah, maybe less than a third on the monitors.
00:23:11.000 I try to stay off the monitors.
00:23:13.000 The monitors are...
00:23:14.000 I want to see.
00:23:15.000 You know, I want to see what's happening.
00:23:17.000 But, like, if they're off to the side, like, pressed up against the cage, then I kind of have to go to the monitors because I need to see, like, I'm comparing it to an experience where I'm about a third of the time I feel like I'm looking at the screens.
00:23:32.000 They're on the ground and I want to see what's going on with the arm that I can't see.
00:23:36.000 That kind of thing.
00:23:38.000 It's a wild fucking sport, man.
00:23:40.000 So wild.
00:23:41.000 I was trying to figure it out the other day.
00:23:42.000 I think I've been to like...
00:23:44.000 Maybe 60 UFCs, man.
00:23:47.000 Jesus Christ.
00:23:48.000 I think so, dude.
00:23:49.000 If I think back to the years when I met Dana and Chuck, and ever since that day, I call up and I'm blessed.
00:23:57.000 I get to go.
00:23:58.000 I know you're always there.
00:24:00.000 And when I was single, dude, when it was those days, it was a whole different game.
00:24:04.000 I'd be in almost every one because most of them were in Vegas.
00:24:07.000 Yeah.
00:24:08.000 So it would be easy to get there.
00:24:10.000 Yeah, those are fun experiences, man.
00:24:13.000 Trying to figure out how to pull up on Abu Dhabi, man.
00:24:16.000 Are you really?
00:24:17.000 I'm trying.
00:24:17.000 I'm trying to figure out, do I just buy a ticket and go, or do I figure out how to, yo, any promoter out there that wants some jump around action?
00:24:26.000 Holler at me.
00:24:28.000 You know what I mean?
00:24:28.000 I'm just trying to pull up on the Abu Dhabi fight and have that experience.
00:24:31.000 I'm going to be watching that one from here.
00:24:34.000 We're going to probably do a fight companion for that.
00:24:36.000 And one day, I want to be invited to one of those.
00:24:38.000 Dude, you've got to come to one of those.
00:24:40.000 Those are ridiculous.
00:24:40.000 No, they're fun.
00:24:42.000 Just try not to get into conspiracies.
00:24:44.000 No, no.
00:24:47.000 I'm well aware.
00:24:48.000 Try to keep any away from the Illuminati.
00:24:51.000 Right.
00:24:52.000 It's the only way it goes south.
00:24:53.000 But even then, it's fun.
00:24:54.000 It's always fun.
00:24:56.000 It's just the best thing in the world is watching fights with friends and laughing.
00:25:02.000 No, I've watched it a few times.
00:25:03.000 A good combination of things.
00:25:05.000 It's a fun thing.
00:25:06.000 My most favorite way to watch fights.
00:25:08.000 Turn the sound down at the house and put y'all up.
00:25:11.000 Man, you could say things you just can't say.
00:25:14.000 You could talk about things that you could never otherwise talk about.
00:25:18.000 And you could describe things with language.
00:25:21.000 All the language.
00:25:22.000 You could use all the language.
00:25:24.000 When I'm doing the UFC, little kids are listening to this.
00:25:28.000 Which is kind of weird, right?
00:25:29.000 If you say, fuck...
00:25:31.000 That's bad.
00:25:32.000 But if they watch someone get beaten...
00:25:34.000 The fighter could say it, though.
00:25:35.000 I mean, you know what I mean?
00:25:36.000 The fighter could say it.
00:25:37.000 Yeah.
00:25:38.000 I think appropriately and intelligently placed, it wouldn't be out of line.
00:25:45.000 But you couldn't overdo it or overuse it.
00:25:47.000 It would have to be like...
00:25:48.000 You'd have to pick that perfect moment.
00:25:50.000 The problem is it gets in the way of...
00:25:56.000 Doing the commentary, right?
00:25:58.000 Any decision that you would make to use that kind of language would get in the way of the commentary because it would be less effective.
00:26:09.000 They would go, oh, this guy.
00:26:11.000 Why do you have to use it there?
00:26:13.000 And there would be judgment of when to use it and why to use it.
00:26:16.000 And then they would think less of what you have to say or be upset by what you have to say.
00:26:21.000 And that would...
00:26:23.000 If you're trying to do commentary, the number one thing you're trying to do is take yourself out of it.
00:26:26.000 I'm trying to do that.
00:26:27.000 I'm just trying to use the best language possible to express my excitement for what we're about to see.
00:26:35.000 This is what's important to me.
00:26:37.000 This is how fucking pumped I am.
00:26:39.000 These guys are murderers.
00:26:40.000 This is going to be fascinating to see.
00:26:42.000 Yoel Romero, Paulo Costa, what the fuck?
00:26:45.000 That's exactly how we were talking in the car on the way down.
00:26:48.000 I was watching that fight like this.
00:26:49.000 This is me.
00:26:52.000 Jesus!
00:26:52.000 It's like one of those fights where we're just waiting for some...
00:26:55.000 The beatings they were giving each other was crazy, man.
00:26:58.000 Fucking two chiseled, granite-looking motherfuckers.
00:27:02.000 Yoel and a Gucci model.
00:27:04.000 Jesus Christ!
00:27:05.000 It's going to be in a Gucci model ad next week.
00:27:07.000 Yeah, for sure.
00:27:07.000 If Gucci doesn't pick him up, they're crazy.
00:27:10.000 That guy's beautiful.
00:27:12.000 They're both giant, beautiful men with incredible bodies.
00:27:16.000 Man, the fight was fucking fantastic.
00:27:18.000 It was so highly skilled.
00:27:20.000 That Paulo Costa guy is for real, man.
00:27:22.000 He's for real.
00:27:23.000 If he can do that to Yoel, if he can stay on top of Yoel like that, Yoel explodes on everyone.
00:27:30.000 Explodes on everyone.
00:27:31.000 But that dude weathered the storm.
00:27:33.000 He weathered the storm and he landed some great shots.
00:27:35.000 It was a very close fight, though, because Yoel hit him with some big shit, too, and Yoel took him down twice.
00:27:42.000 We were, you know, it was my 50th Sunday, so we were out Saturday and Sunday.
00:27:47.000 What's the word again?
00:27:48.000 Oh, Sláinte.
00:27:49.000 Sláinte.
00:27:50.000 Yes, sir.
00:27:50.000 Sláinte.
00:27:51.000 So, like, you know, we were going Yoel, the old guy rep, you know what I mean?
00:27:54.000 Rep for the old guys, you know what I mean?
00:27:56.000 So we were going hard for Yoel.
00:27:58.000 Bro, he wins best body at 42 all over the world.
00:28:02.000 That guy's a monster.
00:28:04.000 I mean, who has more, like, athletic length of their elite career than Yoel?
00:28:10.000 Because at 42, he still moves like he moved 10 years ago.
00:28:14.000 Is he 42, too?
00:28:16.000 Who knows?
00:28:16.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:28:18.000 He's got that Cuban birth certificate.
00:28:20.000 He could be like 48. You know, that's what they say about that Luis Ortiz guy, you know, that elite heavyweight boxer from Cuba.
00:28:26.000 I'm getting trouble from all my Cuban friends for that.
00:28:30.000 I'll be busting my balls.
00:28:32.000 All the Cypress guys.
00:28:33.000 I had him on the podcast with Joey Diaz translating.
00:28:37.000 It was amazing, man, to hear him tell his stories in Cuban.
00:28:41.000 I just wish I spoke Spanish so I could understand it coming from his mouth, but having Joey translate it and talk about all the shit that he had to deal with coming up through the Cuban amateur system of wrestling.
00:28:49.000 This was one of your podcasts?
00:28:50.000 Yeah.
00:28:51.000 Look at that.
00:28:51.000 Dude, look at that.
00:28:51.000 I've got to watch it because that one got by me.
00:28:54.000 Look at that build.
00:28:54.000 That is preposterous.
00:28:56.000 That is one of them sculpted things you buy at Toys R Us, right?
00:29:01.000 It looks like this.
00:29:01.000 Yeah, it's an action figure.
00:29:04.000 That's an action figure for sure.
00:29:05.000 Bro, that does not look like a real live human.
00:29:07.000 It's a Batman suit.
00:29:10.000 That's what that is.
00:29:11.000 He's so freakishly athletic and so powerful.
00:29:15.000 And, you know, it's that Cuban wrestler system.
00:29:17.000 The way he described it is like, they turn you into a machine.
00:29:22.000 You just become a fucking machine.
00:29:24.000 And that's what he is with competition.
00:29:27.000 He's just a machine, man.
00:29:28.000 Yeah, he was clowning, too, in the second two rounds.
00:29:30.000 That's why I kind of felt like, you know...
00:29:33.000 Well, he was trying to get that guy to be emotional and make a mistake.
00:29:35.000 No, for sure.
00:29:36.000 But it was like, again, he finished.
00:29:38.000 He got the best of them in those two rounds.
00:29:41.000 In my book, I thought he won.
00:29:42.000 Close, close.
00:29:43.000 Not bad enough to be, like, bitching about it.
00:29:45.000 But, like, I would have flipped the 29-28, personally.
00:29:48.000 Well, the audience agreed with you when they were booing it.
00:29:53.000 Which is unfortunate because Paulo Costa just fought an amazing fight and he has to feel like shit during the post fight part.
00:29:59.000 That does suck.
00:30:01.000 I don't condone booing any of that stuff.
00:30:03.000 Most of the people that would boo would never get in that ring.
00:30:05.000 I would never get in that ring.
00:30:06.000 You ain't got enough money.
00:30:07.000 Again, I've made a lot of money.
00:30:08.000 And Conor McGregor hasn't got enough money for me to get in that ring, dog.
00:30:12.000 I'm sorry.
00:30:13.000 You got $100 billion.
00:30:15.000 I'm like, ah, man, I like my consciousness.
00:30:18.000 I'm not getting in with Mike Tyson for any money, because that's a lottery ticket on the wrong side of things.
00:30:24.000 Yeah, for sure.
00:30:27.000 The problem is they're booing the decision.
00:30:28.000 It wasn't his decision.
00:30:29.000 He just fought his heart out.
00:30:31.000 And it wasn't that ridiculous, is my point, too.
00:30:34.000 It was like, I would have flipped it, but hey, okay, I can see how that could be seen.
00:30:39.000 100%.
00:30:39.000 And your guy has been live to 60 fucking UFCs.
00:30:44.000 Yeah.
00:30:46.000 It's just...
00:30:48.000 I don't know what the woo thing is that's happened in the last couple years.
00:30:51.000 Woo!
00:30:52.000 And the whole crowd starts...
00:30:54.000 They just get excited.
00:30:56.000 But that's new.
00:30:56.000 That wasn't around a long time ago.
00:30:58.000 It's probably some soccer thing.
00:30:59.000 They probably stole it from soccer.
00:31:01.000 It's like animals answering each other at some point.
00:31:05.000 It's like you got...
00:31:06.000 You know what I mean?
00:31:07.000 Communicating with the woos.
00:31:09.000 Dude, I never even thought of that.
00:31:11.000 That's so true.
00:31:12.000 The woo.
00:31:12.000 That's a new thing.
00:31:13.000 Yeah.
00:31:14.000 I mean, the last few years...
00:31:15.000 Like over the last five or six years, right?
00:31:16.000 Yeah.
00:31:17.000 What do you think?
00:31:17.000 Was that a wrestling thing?
00:31:19.000 You know what?
00:31:19.000 When's the first time it popped up down south like a Kentucky or a North Carolina?
00:31:23.000 That's when I feel like I heard it first.
00:31:25.000 You know, that might be Ric Flair.
00:31:27.000 That might be a Ric Flair.
00:31:28.000 It might be a Ric Flair?
00:31:29.000 Is that what that is?
00:31:30.000 Dude, that would make a lot.
00:31:32.000 Now you fucking solved a mystery for me.
00:31:34.000 That would make sense if we can get some confirmation on that somehow.
00:31:38.000 Someone asked this question on Reddit.
00:31:40.000 Someone says you've been talking about Ric Flair so much that they might have picked it up from you.
00:31:44.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:31:46.000 I don't know if that's right.
00:31:47.000 What if this is some bizarro moment where it all connected?
00:31:50.000 Like, oh shit, I started that.
00:31:52.000 Listen, guys like that are important to America.
00:31:55.000 That guy's such, he's such a character.
00:31:58.000 In his prime, with his suits.
00:32:01.000 Jet flying, alligator wearing.
00:32:03.000 I was a WCW guy, man, and Ric Flair was the man.
00:32:07.000 Dude, he's a character that made his way into, what, a thousand rap songs?
00:32:14.000 How many rap songs have Ric Flair- Dude, there's a whole hip-hop subculture.
00:32:21.000 Involved with wrestling.
00:32:24.000 I'm actually fans of West Side Gun and Conway and this kid Benny.
00:32:28.000 They got this record label called Griselda, but the West Side Gun kid is a wrestling fanatic.
00:32:36.000 I think he's involved with the...
00:32:40.000 WWE doing merch and stuff like that because I see them putting shit together that's definitely got to be licensed.
00:32:48.000 There's this whole subculture of wrestling and hip-hop going on right now too.
00:32:53.000 Wrestling has definitely made its way into stand-up too now.
00:32:56.000 They have this podcast, The Store Horseman, where they all just talk about pro wrestling, a bunch of comics, Tony Hinchcliffe and these comics.
00:33:03.000 Who's on that Store Horseman?
00:33:04.000 Jeremiah Watkins, right?
00:33:06.000 Who else?
00:33:06.000 No, he's not?
00:33:07.000 No.
00:33:07.000 I'm giving out fake news.
00:33:09.000 Fake news.
00:33:10.000 That's fake news.
00:33:12.000 What's not fake news is this is delicious, by the way.
00:33:14.000 It's very good.
00:33:15.000 It's delicious.
00:33:16.000 Buffalo Trace.
00:33:17.000 I ain't mad at it.
00:33:17.000 This company's from 1773, son.
00:33:21.000 They started in 1773. Did you know that they sold whiskey during Prohibition for medicinal purposes?
00:33:28.000 Of course they did.
00:33:28.000 I didn't know that.
00:33:29.000 Well, I didn't, but I'm not shocked at all.
00:33:31.000 So this company kept making whiskey all through the prohibition.
00:33:36.000 Legally, you're saying?
00:33:37.000 Legally, yeah.
00:33:38.000 For medicine.
00:33:39.000 So people that, you know, need a little medicine.
00:33:43.000 I just got a slew of new whiskeys for the birthday.
00:33:47.000 It's Tony Hinchcliffe, Johnny Skirtis, Matt Edgar, Josh Martin.
00:33:52.000 That's right.
00:33:53.000 I hope I said Skirtis' last name right.
00:33:55.000 Is that right?
00:33:56.000 Is that how you say it?
00:33:56.000 It sounds like it.
00:33:58.000 Yeah.
00:33:59.000 Anyway, so comics are really into pro wrestling, too.
00:34:03.000 They even go live, these dorks.
00:34:05.000 They fly out to, like, Wrestlemania, and they go in the audience and livestream everything.
00:34:09.000 Same thing.
00:34:09.000 Yeah, same thing.
00:34:10.000 It's become a thing that people like to do.
00:34:16.000 Like, to go to these big wrestling events and groups of people, whether it's musicians or rappers, hip-hop or stand-ups.
00:34:24.000 They're going, like, experiencing it together.
00:34:27.000 Exactly.
00:34:27.000 It's like the concert experience.
00:34:29.000 Why are rappers so obsessed with Ric Flair?
00:34:32.000 Because he's got, like, 40 Rolexes.
00:34:36.000 You know, he's Ric Flair.
00:34:38.000 That one famous rant that he went on, limousine riding, jet flying.
00:34:43.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:34:45.000 Yeah, that kind of shit.
00:34:46.000 And they were all eight when that happened, and they saw that.
00:34:48.000 Yes, that's everything I want in the universe.
00:34:52.000 Yeah, you see him now.
00:34:54.000 I mean, the guy still gets love everywhere he goes, you know?
00:34:58.000 Like I did in my special where I said, you know, Ric Flair, and then I put the microphone out to the audience.
00:35:04.000 The audience goes, woo!
00:35:05.000 Dude, you started that shit then, dude.
00:35:08.000 You started the woo.
00:35:09.000 I don't think I did.
00:35:11.000 I think it was already going on.
00:35:14.000 I think everybody appreciates this guy.
00:35:16.000 We can't play this, right?
00:35:18.000 We'll get in trouble.
00:35:20.000 As you get older and you see things like this, you appreciate them for what they like.
00:35:26.000 You can think they're cheesy when you're young, but then as you get older you go, no, that's fucking awesome!
00:35:33.000 The fact that that guy is his tank with his beautiful golden mullet with those crazy sunglasses saying all this nutty shit.
00:35:42.000 Big old pinky ring.
00:35:43.000 Dude, man, that's an artist.
00:35:45.000 That guy's an artist.
00:35:47.000 Look at this.
00:35:48.000 That's the male soap opera forever since back when we were children, man.
00:35:52.000 You know what I mean?
00:35:53.000 When I was a kid, it was Bob Backlund and Jimmy Superfly Snooker and Iron Sheik.
00:35:59.000 I don't know if you could have really grown up in America as a little boy and not had a phase at some point where you interacted with one of these wrestling organizations, WCW or WWF, when I was growing up.
00:36:13.000 And if you were one of those kids that's really into alt music and indie groups, you would go for some fucking Killer Kowalski shit.
00:36:21.000 Undertaker.
00:36:22.000 You would try to find some people that were off the beaten path.
00:36:26.000 Do you know about this wrestling organization?
00:36:28.000 Because there's a bunch of weird little tiny ones.
00:36:31.000 Dude, when House of Pain was early on, but we were experiencing pretty good success, ECW had formed.
00:36:40.000 The Crazy Extreme Championship Wrestling, I think that's what it's doing for, out of Philadelphia, and they invited us to a bunch.
00:36:46.000 It was the first time I ever really, and I know it had happened before, but their whole show was about cats cutting their faces open and bleeding during matches and shit.
00:36:55.000 It was insanity, man.
00:36:57.000 And they had packed houses.
00:36:59.000 I mean, I think Dude bought it up.
00:37:01.000 Vince McMahon bought it up, and the guy who owned it or ran it became one of the characters within it, I believe.
00:37:07.000 It's been a long time.
00:37:08.000 I'm old now.
00:37:09.000 I'm 50. Do you see what Ronda Rousey did to her finger?
00:37:12.000 I saw that yesterday.
00:37:14.000 How about that, man?
00:37:15.000 They glued that thing together and she went back to work.
00:37:18.000 How about if I read it right, she finished the take.
00:37:22.000 She finished the take and ignored it until it was over.
00:37:25.000 And then when it was over, she realized how bad it was.
00:37:28.000 So she goes to the hospital, they put it back together again, and then she goes back and finishes.
00:37:33.000 Gangster.
00:37:35.000 Dude.
00:37:35.000 That's dedication.
00:37:36.000 Not a lot of humans can do that.
00:37:37.000 It's also like, I don't want to fight anymore.
00:37:39.000 I'm going to go finish this movie.
00:37:42.000 Nobody wants to cut the weight once they're done.
00:37:44.000 They don't want to come back to that shit.
00:37:46.000 Well, that's just the mindset of an elite combat sports athlete.
00:37:50.000 She just had that mindset.
00:37:51.000 There's not a whole lot of humans that would have dealt with that that way.
00:37:54.000 That's crazy.
00:37:55.000 That lady's made out of bullets.
00:37:57.000 I'm going on my workman's comp from my SAG after insurance.
00:38:03.000 Yeah, you're shutting down production, son.
00:38:05.000 We ain't finishing no scenes.
00:38:07.000 Chopped off a superstar's finger.
00:38:09.000 Yeah, Jesus Christ.
00:38:10.000 What if she lost her finger?
00:38:11.000 What if it was like...
00:38:12.000 I mean, it wasn't...
00:38:14.000 Bro, yeah, that's a fuck...
00:38:16.000 Without the super expert...
00:38:18.000 Yeah.
00:38:19.000 Surgeons, that's gone.
00:38:21.000 Speaking of which, dude, last, I think it happened, I don't know if we talked about it, it might have been after the last time I was on, dude, so I'm on a trip, and I'm coming home literally about to get on the plane, and I get this text from my wife, like, um, I'm at the hospital, I got a,
00:38:37.000 I chopped off my finger.
00:38:38.000 Oh.
00:38:39.000 And I'm like, in my head, I'm like, she didn't chop off her finger, man.
00:38:43.000 She probably got her pretty right stitches.
00:38:46.000 I was like, okay, it's pretty bad.
00:38:47.000 I was like, all right, it was like about a three-hour flight home.
00:38:49.000 I said, all right, I'll be there as soon as I can.
00:38:52.000 So I get there, and I pick her up from the hospital, and she's got the big thing on, and I get the story of...
00:38:57.000 She was getting in the shower and we have a big glass swinging shower door.
00:39:03.000 And she was getting in and holding on to the edge real quick as the door slammed shut on it and just lopped off the fucking hole.
00:39:11.000 To the knuckle, basically.
00:39:14.000 They put that shit back on, fixed it up a little bit.
00:39:18.000 It looks pretty fucking good now, but that was crazy, dog.
00:39:21.000 It just reminded me of it with the whole Ronda Rousey.
00:39:24.000 Fingers are so...
00:39:25.000 It's amazing that they don't break more often.
00:39:27.000 They're so gentle.
00:39:29.000 My shit would be over.
00:39:30.000 Like, if that part of my...
00:39:31.000 This finger...
00:39:32.000 Like, this is the guitar on the fret hand.
00:39:36.000 If I lost that part of that finger, I'm...
00:39:38.000 It's going to take me four or five years to learn how to play with just these, at least.
00:39:43.000 My friend Paul was closing a window, and it shattered and cut his finger and cut through the tendons, and his finger was permanently curled.
00:39:53.000 And he had a bunch of operations to try to straighten it out, but then eventually he just gave up.
00:39:57.000 They could never straighten it out.
00:39:58.000 It never regained full range of motion from a window.
00:40:03.000 It's so delicate.
00:40:04.000 All this stuff is so delicate.
00:40:07.000 That's why it's great.
00:40:08.000 That's why fighting is so ridiculous.
00:40:10.000 A glass door.
00:40:12.000 Not sharp, really.
00:40:13.000 I went home and looked at it.
00:40:15.000 It's pretty beveled on the edges, but the weight of it just lopped off the fucking finger like crazy.
00:40:21.000 She was pretty gangster, though.
00:40:23.000 I have to say, she was pretty gangster.
00:40:25.000 What do you think of that scene where they put his hand in the fucking bowl?
00:40:29.000 My wife actually posted, I don't think it's on her Instagram anymore.
00:40:34.000 She posted the tip of her finger in the plastic bag as she took it to the fucking hospital, dude.
00:40:42.000 Did she have ice in the bag?
00:40:43.000 Yeah.
00:40:44.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:40:44.000 They couldn't reattach, but they were able to extend it somehow.
00:40:51.000 Luckily, the dude out right there, there was a dude who was an expert at hand plastic surgery and hooked her shit up.
00:40:59.000 It looks pretty normal.
00:41:01.000 Something happens to your skin.
00:41:03.000 If your finger gets chopped off at the end, there's a way to make it grow back, right?
00:41:08.000 Am I making this up?
00:41:10.000 It seems like I remember there's a way where if something happens to your tip of your finger.
00:41:14.000 Oh yeah, if you don't get the bone.
00:41:17.000 I think they said something like that, but it got a piece of her bone.
00:41:22.000 That's why I'm saying it's so shocking how it just lopped it off clean.
00:41:27.000 Like an angle, like whip!
00:41:30.000 You like that sound effect?
00:41:31.000 Yeah, whip!
00:41:34.000 I keep thinking that one day they're going to come up with artificial Luke Skywalker type hands.
00:41:38.000 And that people are going to want them instead of regular hands.
00:41:41.000 That's what I'm worried about.
00:41:43.000 Wow.
00:41:44.000 If they came up with an arm that works way better than your arm.
00:41:46.000 It would sound terrible though.
00:41:48.000 Like metal on metal.
00:41:49.000 Unless if you had the skin like simulation I could play guitar with that maybe.
00:41:53.000 I'm talking about self.
00:41:54.000 You could probably do some wild shit.
00:41:56.000 I'm talking about self-healing, bulletproof, spider silk hybrid skin that the government's working on.
00:42:04.000 They're working on that right now.
00:42:05.000 They're working on some sort of...
00:42:07.000 I don't doubt it, man.
00:42:09.000 You want to hear a wild one?
00:42:11.000 All right, I went on, you know, one night fucking smoking.
00:42:14.000 I went on a little YouTube wormhole situation, and somehow...
00:42:20.000 We're good to go.
00:42:30.000 All right?
00:42:31.000 And I'm like, what the fuck?
00:42:32.000 So I go on this video, right?
00:42:34.000 And I'm watching this video, dude.
00:42:36.000 And it's this young kid.
00:42:37.000 He's like 12. And the motherfucker's talking.
00:42:39.000 You know, you got to invest like 20 minutes into this kid talking about things that are super smart.
00:42:46.000 And it's kind of like to show you he's super smart.
00:42:48.000 You know what I mean?
00:42:49.000 This kid.
00:42:49.000 And his dad's doing the recording, I believe, or a relative, somebody very close to him.
00:42:53.000 And he goes into this whole theory of how he thinks when they collided the electrons, I believe, in the super collider, that they caused some crazy chain reaction that blew up the universe,
00:43:08.000 but they also created an atom that weighed too much.
00:43:14.000 The first 20 minutes is also explaining infinite parallel universes.
00:43:18.000 So what the kid winds up with is this theory of like...
00:43:21.000 One atom weighing too much and is that being just enough to shift our universe into a parallel universe?
00:43:29.000 Yeah, this is it right here, dude.
00:43:31.000 So, this kid had me fucked up because after I watched this, everything I saw for months was talking about, like, it would be a news guy on the news, like, I don't know what universe I'm in anymore.
00:43:42.000 Or, uh...
00:43:43.000 Spider-Man into the Spider-Verse.
00:43:46.000 Everything I saw for like four or five months after watching this video was like multiverse shit.
00:43:52.000 Like shit about multiverses.
00:43:54.000 And it's got me fucked up, Joe.
00:43:56.000 I hear you.
00:43:58.000 I'm fucked up too now.
00:43:59.000 That shit got me fucked up, man.
00:44:00.000 Read that paragraph.
00:44:01.000 Look at what it says there.
00:44:02.000 He claims that CERN destroyed the universe during recent experiments, which has resulted in us living in a nearby parallel universe instead.
00:44:12.000 You're welcome, Eddie.
00:44:13.000 There's a lot of people online that think this is an explanation for all the Mandela Effect things that people keep finding online.
00:44:19.000 He goes into stuff about the Mandela Effect, how there's apparently a bunch of people who think Mandela died in prison, and as far as I know, he was released, became president of South America, and that's the universe I'm from, just personally.
00:44:33.000 Yeah.
00:44:34.000 You know, but it's crazy, dude.
00:44:35.000 Because it's not just this video.
00:44:37.000 It's like you watch it and that YouTube algorithm starts sending you down a whole bunch of other, you know what I mean?
00:44:43.000 You start hearing, and it's like, and then again, everything that came out, there was all these shows I would see or movies or news things about the multiverse all of a sudden was everywhere around me.
00:44:54.000 It was fucking nutty, dude.
00:44:55.000 So I'm fucked up about that shit right now.
00:44:57.000 Well, if there was something they could do that might open up a door to a parallel universe, you don't think they would do it?
00:45:05.000 Stranger Things, you mean?
00:45:07.000 Yeah.
00:45:08.000 This is Stranger Things.
00:45:10.000 I mean, things are strange, right?
00:45:12.000 It is Stranger Things.
00:45:14.000 Bizarro world.
00:45:15.000 You know what's the weirdest one?
00:45:16.000 The people that dismiss climate change.
00:45:21.000 That is the weirdest one to me.
00:45:23.000 I'm trying to figure out what's the benefit of dismissing climate change, other than if you work for the oil industry or something.
00:45:31.000 Iceland just lost a glacier.
00:45:33.000 Yeah.
00:45:33.000 Like, they just posted a whole thing of 10 or 80, like something in the 80s, a glacier picture of it, and just now, and it's gone.
00:45:40.000 But I'm not even saying, like, blaming anybody for it.
00:45:43.000 I'm saying dismissing it as an issue.
00:45:45.000 I'm like, let's pretend that people have nothing to do with it.
00:45:48.000 Let's just, I wish people had nothing to do with it.
00:45:52.000 Because then we can go, holy fuck, it's getting hot.
00:45:55.000 How hot is it going to get?
00:45:57.000 We can just figure it out.
00:45:58.000 Our record at this point was two degrees, the oceans are hotter than they've been.
00:46:02.000 Do you know how people do that, where they try to say, this is a natural cycle.
00:46:05.000 This is something that some people still say, right?
00:46:08.000 Okay, even if it was just a natural cycle, I wish humans weren't in the equation at all so there was no argument.
00:46:14.000 I wish it would just be like, hey guys, it's getting really hot, what the fuck do we do?
00:46:19.000 As if we had no control over it whatsoever.
00:46:21.000 Not saying that we shouldn't take steps to fix it, we definitely should, but I'm saying that if it was impossible for people to have created it and it was happening around us, maybe we would be forced to do something.
00:46:33.000 Maybe we'd be forced to go to higher ground, get the fuck out of the really hot spots, make your way towards Canada.
00:46:42.000 I mean, maybe that's what we would do if there was no other way, but we know that at least part of what the problem is, is people.
00:46:51.000 At least part of the problem.
00:46:52.000 But so many people want to start arguments about that and fight that.
00:46:56.000 To me, it's so strange.
00:46:58.000 It's like, what's the benefit of arguing against that it's happening?
00:47:02.000 I don't understand.
00:47:04.000 It's happening.
00:47:04.000 You see it getting warmer.
00:47:06.000 You see the statistics.
00:47:07.000 You see everybody freaking out.
00:47:08.000 The Amazon's on fire.
00:47:10.000 Have you seen it?
00:47:11.000 Yes.
00:47:11.000 No, it's fucking horrifying.
00:47:13.000 You see those photos from Sao Paulo?
00:47:15.000 Yes.
00:47:15.000 And I believe it's purposeful.
00:47:17.000 I have heard that some people are thinking...
00:47:21.000 It's being burnt away on purpose is what I'm...
00:47:23.000 If the things I've read are understood, I won't swear their truth because, again, that's one of the things you're saying is you've got to question everything now.
00:47:33.000 Truth has been compromised, man.
00:47:35.000 You know what I mean?
00:47:35.000 No matter what side of whatever you are on, truth has been seriously compromised because there's a counter-opinion to everything and if you're not...
00:47:46.000 I'm adept enough to really get involved and find factual information.
00:47:51.000 You can literally counter any argument there is with something.
00:47:55.000 Oh, I read this.
00:47:57.000 Well, I read this.
00:47:58.000 Okay, well, that doesn't mean either one of those things are true.
00:48:00.000 Let's go find the truth.
00:48:02.000 That doesn't exist anymore because people just want to Google that shit and get on.
00:48:13.000 Yeah.
00:48:25.000 Legal documents a day without reading them, just by logging into shit on your phone, Amazon or Instagram or whatever.
00:48:33.000 Every time you do that, you subscribe and adhere to their terms and conditions.
00:48:40.000 You think a picture of a copied and pasted Instagram thing over something that was from Facebook?
00:48:46.000 Fucking 12 years ago.
00:48:48.000 It's bananas.
00:48:49.000 It's bananas.
00:48:50.000 People get roped into things.
00:48:52.000 I see smart people posting and saying, better safe than sorry.
00:48:57.000 Yeah, I've seen that too.
00:48:58.000 What argument is that?
00:49:00.000 Well, they don't know how to internet.
00:49:02.000 They don't know how to internet.
00:49:03.000 I'm just saying even if it's like you suspect it's wrong, but fuck it anyways.
00:49:07.000 It's like, wait, wait.
00:49:09.000 If you suspect it's wrong, take the extra time or just don't do it at all.
00:49:14.000 Yeah.
00:49:14.000 Like, what?
00:49:15.000 I'm just using that as an example of what the state of things are as they are.
00:49:21.000 Yeah, it's a sneaky little loophole.
00:49:23.000 It's a sneaky little thing that happens to you.
00:49:25.000 You have to...
00:49:26.000 Everybody's posting something stupid.
00:49:28.000 Did you send it to me?
00:49:29.000 Oh, Everlast sent it to me.
00:49:30.000 It must be legit.
00:49:31.000 Let me just post it.
00:49:32.000 You know?
00:49:33.000 I mean, how many times have you done that?
00:49:34.000 I've done that all the time.
00:49:35.000 I posted something, clowning it, and then immediately after it, Dana came up, it was him posting the exact thing.
00:49:42.000 With the whole, like, better, safe, than sorry thing.
00:49:44.000 Oh, Christ.
00:49:44.000 You know what I mean?
00:49:45.000 I was like, oh, man.
00:49:47.000 Oh, dude.
00:49:52.000 They got everybody, though.
00:49:53.000 They got that fucking Rick Perry guy.
00:49:55.000 Everybody.
00:49:56.000 Everybody.
00:49:56.000 Isn't Rick Perry's job to, like, fucking protect the nukes or something?
00:50:00.000 I saw a governor or something post it, too.
00:50:02.000 What is Rick Perry?
00:50:03.000 They said Rick Perry, but he has a specific job in the government.
00:50:06.000 It's like the energy secretary.
00:50:08.000 He's, like, in control of the nukes, right?
00:50:10.000 Is that what it is?
00:50:11.000 If you're the energy secretary, yeah, you are.
00:50:13.000 I don't know.
00:50:14.000 Whatever the fuck he is, he's got a big job, and he fell for it.
00:50:18.000 It's...
00:50:21.000 It's bizarro world.
00:50:22.000 We're in bizarro world.
00:50:23.000 Maybe that fucking kid is right.
00:50:24.000 I'm telling you, dude.
00:50:26.000 Yo, you're going to be calling me in a couple nights like, fuck you, dude.
00:50:30.000 Why did you even tell me about that?
00:50:32.000 I've bounced the idea of multiple universes many times.
00:50:37.000 We all have, but this kid, watch it.
00:50:39.000 You're going to invest.
00:50:41.000 Give it 20 minutes or 15, 18 minutes, whatever it is, and then...
00:50:45.000 You'll be like, oh wow, it's not that it's fact, but it's like, wow, that's super possible.
00:50:51.000 It's super, super possible the way he breaks it down.
00:50:54.000 What about this?
00:50:55.000 What if every time you went to sleep and you woke up, you passed into a nearby and very similar universe, but not quite the same?
00:51:07.000 And depending upon your choices and how you live your life, It's how you wake up and what new one you pop into on the other side and everyone's just a little bit different.
00:51:19.000 The whole world changes just a little bit each time you make a decision one way or another.
00:51:24.000 Everything changes when you wake up.
00:51:26.000 You think the world is static.
00:51:28.000 Because it is when you're awake.
00:51:29.000 You have no fucking idea what's happening while you're asleep.
00:51:32.000 And when you wake up again, you have this foggy recollection of the past.
00:51:37.000 And that's what you're going by.
00:51:39.000 You're going by every morning waking up with a foggy recollection of the past.
00:51:44.000 That's what you're doing.
00:51:45.000 And you're assuming that nothing's changed and everything's static.
00:51:49.000 And while you were asleep for eight hours, nothing weird happened.
00:51:52.000 You don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
00:51:54.000 You have no idea.
00:51:55.000 You're dreaming.
00:51:55.000 You're having crazy fantasies and shit.
00:51:57.000 Weird stuff is happening.
00:51:58.000 You're fucking mermaids.
00:51:59.000 You're flying through the air on a helicopter.
00:52:03.000 Weird things happen when you're dreaming.
00:52:04.000 What is all that about?
00:52:05.000 We don't even know.
00:52:06.000 We have no idea what that is.
00:52:07.000 That soup of possibilities that's fucking swirling around in between your ears while you're snoring up a storm.
00:52:12.000 And then, boom, you wake up.
00:52:14.000 Are you sure?
00:52:16.000 Those memories are real?
00:52:17.000 Are you sure that this isn't a whole completely new universe that you're living in today?
00:52:23.000 Or assimilation.
00:52:25.000 Or assimilation.
00:52:27.000 I said assimilation.
00:52:30.000 I will call myself out on that one right there.
00:52:33.000 There was some fucking, another genius super wizard kid who was talking about that.
00:52:38.000 Something about simulations.
00:52:40.000 I was high at the house with the guy who runs my studio, Divine, and we were just fucking laughing, talking shit one day.
00:52:49.000 I may have heard this.
00:52:52.000 It could have been on your show.
00:52:54.000 I could have read this.
00:52:55.000 So I'm not claiming ownership of the thought.
00:52:58.000 But it was like, what if we just come from a universe that's so perfect and shit, and it's boring as fuck, and we just plug in to have all these fucked up weird problems, and that's why everything's getting fucking weirder and crazier, because that's kind of why we're here.
00:53:13.000 That's part of the ride.
00:53:14.000 That could be it.
00:53:16.000 It could be the only way you appreciate love is to know hate.
00:53:20.000 They'll really appreciate it.
00:53:22.000 And it could be the only way we would appreciate all the good that we have is to balance it out with all the bad that we have.
00:53:29.000 And when they start to overwhelm each other one way or the other, there's an imbalance that takes place and it leads to all of our fucking problems as a society.
00:53:37.000 And when you think about how long you're going to be alive and what it is that you're doing here and why you're doing it, You know, all those weird questions and answers that go on inside your head, it's all, you're distributing energy, right?
00:53:51.000 You're trying to figure out, am I distributing my energy right?
00:53:54.000 Am I living my life in a way that is, like, the best I can do with what I've got right now?
00:54:03.000 That's it.
00:54:04.000 All these mind fucks.
00:54:05.000 That's all you gotta do, though.
00:54:06.000 I mean, honestly, even, no matter what we're saying, if you woke up every day and that was your objective, you couldn't really go or do much wrong.
00:54:15.000 No, no, you can't.
00:54:16.000 And what if every day when you did that, you woke up in a nearby universe that was just a little bit different because of what you thought and did?
00:54:24.000 Dude, that's like, you know, that's a movie.
00:54:26.000 It's a magic type shit, Everlast.
00:54:28.000 That's a movie, man.
00:54:28.000 That's a movie.
00:54:29.000 It's a magic type shit.
00:54:30.000 Oh, you went, see, okay, I was being, I just was like trying to be not such a glutton.
00:54:36.000 There we go.
00:54:36.000 Salute.
00:54:37.000 Salute.
00:54:39.000 DJ Melody over there, I just wanted to...
00:54:41.000 Cheers!
00:54:41.000 How about cheers?
00:54:41.000 Let's go American, goddammit.
00:54:43.000 Cheers.
00:54:44.000 Cheers.
00:54:45.000 Yeah.
00:54:47.000 You got a DJ, bro.
00:54:48.000 The only guy ever.
00:54:51.000 See, here's the thing.
00:54:52.000 I believe, besides myself, is Honey Honey Band.
00:54:56.000 Yeah, I think they're the only other ones.
00:54:58.000 Other ones that have done music on the show, right?
00:54:59.000 Not totally true.
00:55:01.000 Is that true?
00:55:02.000 You might be right.
00:55:03.000 You were definitely the first.
00:55:05.000 And then Gary Clark brought his guitar, but we just chilled.
00:55:09.000 I'm a huge fan of that.
00:55:10.000 I think Sturgill brought his guitar the first time.
00:55:13.000 He might not even brought his guitar the first time.
00:55:15.000 Sturgill Simpson?
00:55:15.000 Sturgill, yeah.
00:55:16.000 I hung out with him once at a sneaker shop on Melrose.
00:55:20.000 They have a new song that he just released.
00:55:22.000 His new album is fucking incredible.
00:55:24.000 I got a chance to listen to it in advance before it's released, and they just released something on YouTube.
00:55:30.000 It's like this Japanese anime with...
00:55:33.000 What's the name of the actual video so people can find it on YouTube?
00:55:39.000 Singalong.
00:55:39.000 Singalong.
00:55:40.000 It's a fucking amazing song, but the video is cool as shit, man.
00:55:44.000 It's all this Japanese anime.
00:55:46.000 So he did all of this...
00:55:49.000 He did all these crazy animations.
00:55:52.000 It's like a film that takes place while the album plays.
00:55:56.000 Oh, shit.
00:55:57.000 Yeah, so it's all coordinated to the songs.
00:56:00.000 I mean, he's been working on this shit forever.
00:56:03.000 He's been flying back and forth to Japan and L.A. I mean, this is a labor of love.
00:56:09.000 I like his style.
00:56:11.000 It's really incredible.
00:56:12.000 I met him, like I said, my buddy owns a sneaker shop with Melrose, and he was, I guess, a bit of a sneakerhead himself.
00:56:17.000 Oh, really?
00:56:18.000 So we'd be politic one day and talk some shit.
00:56:20.000 He's one of my favorite people.
00:56:21.000 Yeah, I like the style of the country, kind of outlaw-ish, but like big band-ish stuff he's doing.
00:56:27.000 Yeah, and you know what I love about that guy?
00:56:29.000 He didn't even try to go for it as a professional musician until he was like 36. His wife talked him into it.
00:56:35.000 His wife was like, you know, you don't suck.
00:56:38.000 That's like what she said to him.
00:56:42.000 That's high praise.
00:56:44.000 She's like, you're fucking good.
00:56:45.000 And he went for it.
00:56:47.000 From somebody who wakes up with you and goes to bed with you, it's like, you don't suck.
00:56:50.000 I mean, that's high praise.
00:56:52.000 But he had crazy jobs, like railroad worker, shit like that.
00:56:55.000 Did a bunch of regular jobs.
00:56:57.000 And just was writing music and singing music.
00:57:00.000 And then she convinced him to go for it.
00:57:04.000 Yeah, he's an unusual character, man.
00:57:06.000 This stuff, all this new stuff is different.
00:57:09.000 It's like, he used to be, you would think of him as country.
00:57:13.000 Like, you can't even, you don't even know what to say now.
00:57:15.000 This new stuff is not country.
00:57:17.000 It's wild, though.
00:57:18.000 It's really good.
00:57:19.000 Check it out.
00:57:20.000 Yeah, it's like, it's this kind of hybrid rock thing he's doing, but it's pretty fucking badass.
00:57:30.000 It says, Waylon had sex with Queens of the Stone Age while the Black Keys watched.
00:57:37.000 That's the first comment on the video.
00:57:38.000 Who said that?
00:57:39.000 Who named that guy?
00:57:40.000 Top comment, Shelby Riley.
00:57:42.000 Shelby Riley.
00:57:43.000 Congrats.
00:57:43.000 Congrats, you won.
00:57:44.000 You won the internet for the day.
00:57:46.000 For the day.
00:57:46.000 That is exactly what it sounds like.
00:57:48.000 It's really good stuff, man.
00:57:49.000 He's a beast.
00:57:50.000 Sing along, you said that was called?
00:57:51.000 Yeah.
00:57:51.000 I'm gonna check it out.
00:57:52.000 Yeah.
00:57:53.000 Absolutely.
00:57:53.000 He's doing weird shit.
00:57:55.000 That's the only thing to do, man.
00:57:57.000 It's, you know...
00:57:58.000 And, you know, weird shit in the sense of, like, yo, shit that excites you.
00:58:02.000 It's like, you know, I've never tried to make the same thing twice, you know, because it's like, I want to be excited.
00:58:09.000 I want to be scared to fail.
00:58:10.000 You know what I mean?
00:58:11.000 I want to be like, you know, oh, that didn't work.
00:58:15.000 Next time.
00:58:16.000 Yeah.
00:58:17.000 Well, you've always switched shit up.
00:58:19.000 That's one of the more interesting things about you.
00:58:21.000 It's like when you were doing what it's like, and when you switched up to Whitey Ford sings the blues, everybody was like, whoa!
00:58:32.000 This is the jump around guy?
00:58:34.000 This is the house of pain guy?
00:58:38.000 It felt so easy to digest for most people.
00:58:42.000 Because this is before I knew you.
00:58:44.000 And I was like, because it's so authentic.
00:58:47.000 It's very obvious that this was...
00:58:48.000 Thank you.
00:58:49.000 The kind of music that you were writing was like music that came from your feelings and your soul.
00:58:54.000 It was like, wow, this is real shit.
00:58:56.000 Yeah, it was 20 years ago.
00:58:58.000 Dude, what it's like was a classic.
00:59:02.000 That was a classic.
00:59:03.000 That was one of those songs that was like, that's a heartfelt song.
00:59:07.000 That's a soul-filled song.
00:59:10.000 That's like a universal song.
00:59:12.000 Yeah, I went to New York.
00:59:15.000 I had left House of Pain I went to New York with a buddy of mine and was just kind of sleeping on his couch and he had a guitar there.
00:59:24.000 I started strumming it one night and singing these little words and he came bursting out of his room in the back like, what the fuck is that?
00:59:32.000 And kind of was like, we're recording that tomorrow.
00:59:35.000 We were making a rap record.
00:59:36.000 I was there to just kind of further the rap career.
00:59:40.000 Nobody really knew I played guitar and stuff like that a little bit.
00:59:43.000 It was his encouragement that definitely came back when he was like, I think he was with it broad back there and he just heard the song and jumped like, what the fuck is that?
00:59:53.000 You know what I mean?
00:59:54.000 And so the next day they basically forced me to record it.
00:59:57.000 So I had to finish, right?
00:59:59.000 I wrote it like that night.
01:00:00.000 I think I had the first part, the whole liquor store guy at the liquor store thing, but I didn't really have anything else.
01:00:07.000 But he heard that part and was like, yo, you need to finish that.
01:00:10.000 When you get those ideas, when they come to you, what does that feel like?
01:00:13.000 Does it feel like a gift comes out of the universe?
01:00:16.000 A lot of the times, the really good ones, yeah.
01:00:19.000 You know what I mean?
01:00:22.000 What blows my mind, and I'm going to flip it on you real quick, is the comic arc of you get to work this thing out for a whole long time.
01:00:33.000 And if you're really successful on your level type thing, then you shoot a special and that joke kind of goes away.
01:00:40.000 You don't really get to tell that anymore.
01:00:43.000 And that blows my mind because my whole thing is like, work this thing out and build this thing that I can go out and play every night for the rest of my life.
01:00:51.000 Right.
01:00:51.000 So, like, you're, you know what I mean, like, so all the kudos being thrown back and forth.
01:00:56.000 When I look at you or any amazing comedian that just turns it around and every year, two years, is belting out these fucking funny-ass specials, and then, like, you can't do that anymore.
01:01:07.000 Like...
01:01:08.000 Unless you're Andrew Dice Clay with the little fucking hickory dickory doc.
01:01:13.000 He's the only guy ever that you want to hear the old stuff over and over and over again.
01:01:17.000 You'll see a whole set of just rhymes.
01:01:20.000 Are you familiar with Little Duvall?
01:01:24.000 Yes.
01:01:25.000 The whole singing.
01:01:26.000 He's flipping this whole script on what comedy and music and entertainment is right now.
01:01:33.000 He's kind of doing some really fucking interesting shit.
01:01:35.000 He's also got a bunch of crazy shit going on on his Instagram.
01:01:37.000 His Instagram is hilarious, too.
01:01:39.000 He's got something I need to explain to me.
01:01:40.000 It's one of my favorite follows in the universe.
01:01:43.000 He starts cultural phenomena.
01:01:47.000 Yes.
01:01:47.000 Period.
01:01:49.000 He sets shit off.
01:01:50.000 I've watched him say some shit on his Instagram and will it into existence, and it becomes like a trend.
01:01:57.000 The songs he's written.
01:01:59.000 It's just like...
01:02:01.000 It's amazing.
01:02:03.000 It's one of my favorite follows, honestly.
01:02:06.000 Yeah, he's something special.
01:02:07.000 Andrew Schultz really made me take a...
01:02:10.000 I mean, I knew about that song, Smile Bitch.
01:02:13.000 I actually found out about that song because Stylebender...
01:02:17.000 Stylebender would come out to fight with Smile Bitch.
01:02:20.000 And he came out to fight with me and talked about it.
01:02:22.000 He goes, I love Lil Duval.
01:02:24.000 I'm like, oh, let me check out Lil Duval.
01:02:26.000 And I was like, god damn, this guy's good.
01:02:27.000 And then Andrew Schultz says, yo, he's a comedian.
01:02:30.000 And he goes, he's one of the most insightful and brilliant people I've ever met.
01:02:33.000 And just like almost like a naturally curious guy.
01:02:36.000 You need to get him on.
01:02:37.000 Yeah, we're working on it.
01:02:38.000 Yeah.
01:02:38.000 We're going to make it happen.
01:02:40.000 That'd be amazing.
01:02:41.000 It's going to be great.
01:02:41.000 But Schultz is a wizard.
01:02:42.000 If Schultz tells me that someone's good, I'll buy it.
01:02:45.000 Yeah, and he was early internet dude.
01:02:49.000 He's been working these internet angles, kind of like you.
01:02:52.000 Got in really early, saw something he liked.
01:02:55.000 He's got his own thing going on with that whole City Boys, Country Boys thing.
01:03:01.000 But that's all in relation to the song he's got.
01:03:03.000 I know, I know, I know.
01:03:04.000 But it's hilarious how people, it's like a daily thing.
01:03:07.000 The points back and forth.
01:03:07.000 Oh man, if you don't follow him, go!
01:03:10.000 Yeah, yeah, go follow him.
01:03:11.000 He's one of the best followers.
01:03:12.000 Lil Duval, just shoot me some tickets to your next show in LA. I'm a huge fan.
01:03:16.000 That's it.
01:03:17.000 However millions on this show, follow Lil Duval because he's hilarious and funny.
01:03:22.000 And yes, sir.
01:03:23.000 Follow him to make sure that he's not really shadow banned anymore.
01:03:26.000 That shit's crazy.
01:03:27.000 I got a friend who's going through that right now.
01:03:29.000 Where they just disappear off the shit when you search for them.
01:03:34.000 He's up there now.
01:03:34.000 Ah, they're ghosting you.
01:03:36.000 I feel like it's an ad.
01:03:36.000 Oh, it's there?
01:03:37.000 You can find him?
01:03:37.000 Okay, good.
01:03:38.000 Yeah.
01:03:38.000 There you are.
01:03:39.000 I'm telling you, man, you couldn't find him for a while.
01:03:41.000 There you go, Andrew Schultz.
01:03:42.000 It was tricky.
01:03:44.000 It was very tricky.
01:03:46.000 Very tricky back in the day.
01:03:49.000 Yeah.
01:03:50.000 Awesome.
01:03:56.000 Lil Duval.
01:03:57.000 So what do you want to do today, man?
01:03:59.000 You got a DJ? I brought a little, you know, we got a few things to do, we could do for you.
01:04:03.000 You know, I brought a little, you know, I've come here with just a guitar, with a keyboard player, and I was like, I'm going to bring my man from the world famous Beat Junkies, DJ Melody, over here.
01:04:12.000 I like to pretend.
01:04:12.000 They got their own university, Beat Junkies Institute of Technology.
01:04:18.000 Sound.
01:04:18.000 Sound.
01:04:20.000 Beat Junkies Institute of Sound in Glendale, California.
01:04:24.000 DJ Melody, shout out to Babu, J-Rock, all the homies.
01:04:29.000 Shout out to everybody.
01:04:30.000 Yeah, you know how we do it.
01:04:32.000 But yeah, we got some things you want.
01:04:33.000 You want us to get into something?
01:04:35.000 Let's get into something.
01:04:36.000 Let's do it.
01:04:37.000 I'm going to move over here real quick.
01:04:39.000 Ladies and gentlemen, I think it's only you and Honey Honey.
01:04:43.000 I really do.
01:04:44.000 I think so, right?
01:04:45.000 I actually feel like that.
01:04:52.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:04:54.000 Alright.
01:04:54.000 DJ Melody in the house.
01:05:01.000 Yeah.
01:05:03.000 Joe Rogan Experience.
01:05:07.000 Everlast.
01:05:08.000 Come on.
01:05:34.000 Brand new sneakers in a back old chain.
01:05:38.000 We do the good cocaine.
01:05:45.000 Don't complain.
01:05:46.000 Everywhere I go, people know my name.
01:05:50.000 We got the money and fame.
01:05:52.000 And they don't treat me the same.
01:05:55.000 And no, I don't come back to what status lasts until Maddie.
01:06:08.000 We're good to go.
01:06:09.000 We're good to go.
01:06:30.000 Come to fruition.
01:06:32.000 I'm all natural.
01:06:33.000 No preservative.
01:06:35.000 South superlative.
01:06:36.000 You don't deserve to live.
01:06:38.000 We never truly die.
01:06:39.000 God was never born.
01:06:41.000 Tell your vision lies.
01:06:42.000 Watch that murder porn.
01:06:44.000 Brand new sneakers in a fat gold chain.
01:06:48.000 We do the good cocaine.
01:06:51.000 We don't feel no pain.
01:06:53.000 No, we don't complain.
01:06:56.000 And everywhere I go, people know my name.
01:06:59.000 We got the money in fame.
01:07:02.000 And they don't treat me the same.
01:07:05.000 No, I don't complain.
01:07:09.000 I smoke like Willie.
01:07:11.000 I party like Waylon.
01:07:13.000 I'm wilder than David Lee, raw than Van Halen.
01:07:15.000 I'm batshit crazier than Jay and Sarah Palen.
01:07:18.000 Here's a smooth sailing on all these rough waters.
01:07:21.000 Mothers love their son.
01:07:23.000 Fathers love their daughters.
01:07:24.000 All the things they give us.
01:07:26.000 All the things they bought us.
01:07:27.000 The love that first made us.
01:07:28.000 All the things they taught us.
01:07:30.000 Like doing none of the others.
01:07:31.000 And loving all your brothers.
01:07:33.000 And helping out your neighbors when they need a hand.
01:07:36.000 Everyone went solo with a bug like Viola and it's hard to tell a woman sometimes from a man.
01:07:41.000 It's a ball of confusion and everybody's losing, living fake lives up on Instagram.
01:07:47.000 But everything's funny when you front for your money while the devil executes his fucking master plan like...
01:07:53.000 Brand new sneakers and a fat gold chain.
01:07:58.000 We do the good cocaine.
01:08:06.000 Never welcome people to know my name.
01:08:09.000 We got the money in the thing.
01:08:12.000 And they don't treat me the same.
01:08:15.000 No, I don't complain.
01:08:20.000 You know I don't complain.
01:08:28.000 Brand new sneakers in a fat gold chain.
01:08:32.000 We do the good cocaine.
01:08:46.000 That was great.
01:08:47.000 Thank you, sir.
01:08:48.000 I like it.
01:08:49.000 This is a new one?
01:08:50.000 Yeah.
01:08:51.000 Just released?
01:08:52.000 Yeah, it is.
01:08:53.000 You know, what happened was, right, we didn't even...
01:08:55.000 When I came in last time, I think we agreed to just fucking not talk about...
01:09:01.000 The fires and shit.
01:09:03.000 Oh, right.
01:09:03.000 We were both kind of a little traumatized, I think.
01:09:06.000 That's right.
01:09:07.000 Because what happened was I put this record out last, what did I think, October.
01:09:10.000 Right.
01:09:11.000 Hit the road.
01:09:13.000 And it was maybe two weeks in.
01:09:33.000 Do you feel like when you get through something like a fire with your family that for some inexplicable reason you feel like a little bit closer?
01:09:44.000 Oh, yeah.
01:09:45.000 Because, I mean, my wife and children were in the house when it was caught fire.
01:09:50.000 You know what I mean?
01:09:51.000 So, yeah.
01:09:53.000 Not literally.
01:09:54.000 Here's how it went down.
01:09:56.000 Let's tell the story, right?
01:09:59.000 Basically, like I said, I was in New York.
01:10:00.000 I get a call from the wife.
01:10:02.000 The fire is right across the hill.
01:10:03.000 Like, I live literally like Sydney Valley.
01:10:05.000 Then the mountains bang.
01:10:06.000 I'm kind of the first line right there once you come over those mountains.
01:10:10.000 Yeah.
01:10:11.000 So I get a picture from her across the street from me.
01:10:15.000 The hill looks like a hell landscape.
01:10:19.000 You know what I mean?
01:10:19.000 It's fucking just on fire.
01:10:21.000 So they're packing up and they're getting ready to get out.
01:10:25.000 And there's a fire truck in the neighborhood, thank goodness.
01:10:28.000 And as my wife's putting the final stuff in the car, the kids are running there, she's putting all the dogs in.
01:10:34.000 And, you know, whatever the medicines and stuff we need for Layla.
01:10:38.000 And she turns around and sees like on the corner of the garage, like an orange kind of glow.
01:10:45.000 And the thing about this is like, you know, people think the fire comes and hits the street and then jumps and burns all these houses.
01:10:51.000 That's not what happens.
01:10:52.000 If you ever notice in the middle, if you're watching the news shit, it's like one random house in the neighborhood burns.
01:10:56.000 It's trees.
01:10:57.000 It's having a tree right on your house that's touching your house.
01:10:59.000 Well, I happen to have a tree right there that was touching the corner of my garage.
01:11:02.000 The tree went up.
01:11:03.000 That thing caught.
01:11:05.000 Garage went.
01:11:05.000 About a third of the house went.
01:11:07.000 You know what I mean?
01:11:08.000 Everybody was out already.
01:11:10.000 My wife was able to...
01:11:11.000 The only reason a third of the house...
01:11:12.000 My wife saved our whole block, honestly, because there's trees between all of our houses for privacy, because everybody has a pool and nobody wants to be in two-story houses, all that shit.
01:11:23.000 So everybody just has these big, huge, just spiny-looking trees, you know what I mean, that go with that cover, turn into a wall, basically.
01:11:30.000 Right.
01:11:31.000 The whole block would have went up.
01:11:32.000 Had she not been there and had the wherewithal to run down the block and get the firemen that had just drawn by and said, come back and fucking put this out.
01:11:39.000 She actually ran down there?
01:11:41.000 She ran down the block, dude, and got it done.
01:11:43.000 She's a gangster.
01:11:44.000 The fires that were out here were so...
01:11:46.000 It's so hard for people to understand what it was like.
01:11:48.000 It was frightening.
01:11:49.000 It was like a war.
01:11:50.000 It was frightening.
01:11:50.000 It was like we were at war with a natural force.
01:11:53.000 It was very strange, man.
01:11:54.000 Everybody was holed up together.
01:11:56.000 Yeah.
01:11:57.000 Me and my family, we got a hotel in town with a bunch of our friends.
01:12:01.000 We were texting.
01:12:01.000 We were texting back and forth.
01:12:03.000 And Tommy and his wife, Tom Segura and his wife, they came over too.
01:12:07.000 And we were all in the same place.
01:12:09.000 We were all like refugees for a small, tiny period of time.
01:12:13.000 It makes you realize how fortunate we really are to be here in this place where we're at right now.
01:12:20.000 We don't have to deal with most of the bullshit that people are dealing with all over the world, man.
01:12:24.000 You know, we just...
01:12:24.000 One day of fire, one week of fire, whatever it was, it freaked everybody out and scared the shit, and a lot of people lost their lives, or houses, rather.
01:12:32.000 A lot of people lost their lives in Northern California, right?
01:12:35.000 Yeah, no, that was...
01:12:36.000 That was even worse than down there, right?
01:12:37.000 You couldn't even...
01:12:38.000 Yeah, you couldn't even, like...
01:12:41.000 Really get a perspective like for your own shit because the minute you wanted to like do that you saw an entire town flattened in like an hour.
01:12:48.000 Yeah, they lost people on the highway.
01:12:50.000 People were trying to get out on the highway and they get caught in their cars and they caught fire.
01:12:53.000 Man, it's horrible.
01:12:55.000 And there's...
01:12:57.000 You know, for the people that survived, like for us, and it sounds ridiculous to call yourself a survivor, it's not like it was a war, but it's something that you really understand when you get through that.
01:13:08.000 You're like, wow, we are barely in control of our own environment.
01:13:12.000 Barely.
01:13:12.000 And all it takes is one good strong wind, one good fucking hot day, one good gust of fire, and next thing you know, everything's on fire.
01:13:21.000 I mean, that was nuts.
01:13:23.000 The kids are still dealing with it, you know, trying to explain that thing to the kids, like that universal unsurety.
01:13:31.000 Like, there's just not really...
01:13:32.000 Honey, I'm going to keep you as safe as I can, but if you really want the absolute truth, I can only tell you that some shit happens.
01:13:41.000 And, you know, it was actually another big fire somewhere.
01:13:45.000 Oh...
01:13:47.000 Oddly enough, when Notre Dame caught fire, it was all on the news, and my daughter, my oldest, was like, oh, that caught fire?
01:13:55.000 I proposed to my wife in Paris, so we talk about Paris a lot.
01:13:59.000 So she looks forward to all that.
01:14:01.000 She wanted to see it.
01:14:02.000 She was really interested in Notre Dame when the thing burned.
01:14:04.000 But something about that burning, and when it did, and she saw it, she was like, oh, it can happen anywhere.
01:14:10.000 And it kind of dawned on her, like, okay, it's not just there.
01:14:14.000 Because for a long time, I couldn't even drive by the house with her to go check on it or something, if she was in the car, my wife either, because she just didn't want to be over there.
01:14:21.000 And then after that, it kind of changed, and she kind of realized, like, well, I guess it can happen anywhere.
01:14:27.000 Yeah, if it can happen in Notre Dame.
01:14:29.000 Which was a crazy thing to witness happen in a human, like, person, like, come to that understanding of, like, wow, shit's just not guaranteed.
01:14:37.000 Like, in a weird way, you know what I mean?
01:14:39.000 But isn't there kind of a, there's a magic in that.
01:14:42.000 Yeah.
01:14:42.000 If you can get through, if you're one of the survivors, there's a magic in that that doesn't exist without the possibility of that.
01:14:50.000 I have people asking me, what are you going to do?
01:14:52.000 And I'm like, what do you mean?
01:14:53.000 They're like, you're going to build a house in the same spot?
01:14:54.000 I'm like, fucking goddamn right.
01:14:56.000 You know what I mean?
01:14:57.000 Absolutely.
01:14:57.000 I don't live in some crazy, bizarro-like place.
01:15:00.000 I'm going to build my house right where it was.
01:15:02.000 I'll tell you what I'm going to do.
01:15:04.000 I'm going to build a house on the top of a hill.
01:15:05.000 Put the sprinklers on your house.
01:15:07.000 People have the sprinklers.
01:15:08.000 There was cats that whole neighborhoods burnt down, and then one house had the sprinklers.
01:15:12.000 That house was pristine.
01:15:14.000 The problem with that is you do get survivor syndrome.
01:15:18.000 You feel weird.
01:15:20.000 You get survivor guilt of the first three houses in front of me.
01:15:25.000 Right in front of my house.
01:15:26.000 You know what?
01:15:26.000 Three houses gone.
01:15:27.000 I could understand that if you were like the guy who kind of futuristically predicted a fire and put that on.
01:15:35.000 But after now, it's like, yo, if you didn't put shit on now, everybody knows about that shit now.
01:15:39.000 So put that shit on your house.
01:15:41.000 If you're going to live in one of these areas, we're basically in California, they're telling us now.
01:15:45.000 This might be a new norm.
01:15:47.000 You know what I mean?
01:15:47.000 These kind of fires.
01:15:49.000 That's so crazy.
01:15:50.000 You know?
01:15:50.000 So, because there hadn't been one in the area, you know, those areas, like Gora Hills and Simi Valley, there hadn't been one for many, many, many, like a couple decades, I believe.
01:16:01.000 Climate change is not real.
01:16:03.000 No, it's fake.
01:16:04.000 It's fake news.
01:16:08.000 Something's clearly happening, right?
01:16:10.000 This is not normal.
01:16:12.000 Right, if you had a guess.
01:16:13.000 Not in my 36 years.
01:16:15.000 It seems like there's been an adjustment.
01:16:17.000 I've been the same Irish white motherfucker all my life, and I didn't burn like this when I was young.
01:16:22.000 When did you move to L.A.? Oh, I've been here most of my life.
01:16:25.000 I was born in New York and whatever and probably did a kindergarten part of first grade out there.
01:16:31.000 My dad was a construction dude during the 70s boom of Simi Valley and all that shit being built.
01:16:37.000 He came out during that era.
01:16:38.000 Nobody talked about crazy fires back then.
01:16:42.000 Did they?
01:16:43.000 They didn't, right?
01:16:44.000 No, not really.
01:16:45.000 I got evacuated for the first time while we were filming Fear Factor, and I remember I was driving home, and it started, there was a fire, it seemed like it was a little bit out of control, like, wow, this is crazy, and I'm driving to work.
01:16:58.000 And then we filmed the day, and then as we're driving home, people are letting us know, hey man, this is bad.
01:17:04.000 This has gotten really bad.
01:17:06.000 And as we're driving home, a guy got hit by a car, and he got killed.
01:17:11.000 And I didn't see his body, but I saw his shoe.
01:17:14.000 And we're like passing by where like all these people were freaking out because a guy apparently just tried to run into the highway and some guy hit him because he was panicking because there was a bunch of shit going on.
01:17:26.000 There was fire.
01:17:26.000 I don't know if he was panicking.
01:17:28.000 But something happened.
01:17:29.000 A guy got hit by a car.
01:17:30.000 So it has this ominous feeling of, whoa, somebody just died.
01:17:33.000 And we're driving down this highway, and the whole right side is on fire.
01:17:39.000 I mean, the whole right side of the highway for an hour, like a Lord of the Rings movie.
01:17:45.000 Mordor.
01:17:46.000 Dude, like flakes of ash are falling from the sky like a light snow.
01:17:53.000 It's fucking strange.
01:17:56.000 You're just waiting for demons to come riding on fucking horses over the top of the hills.
01:18:00.000 It's that bad.
01:18:01.000 And by the time I got back, we had to evacuate from our community, and we just got the fuck out of Dodge.
01:18:07.000 That was the first time that had ever happened, ever, for me, living out here since 94. And that was in like 2002, 2003, something like that.
01:18:17.000 And then it's happened twice since then.
01:18:20.000 It's a creepy feeling, man.
01:18:21.000 It's creepy.
01:18:22.000 It's like you know that no one can do anything if everything goes wrong.
01:18:26.000 If everything goes wrong, the wind gets too strong, and it gets too wide, and it goes left, and it goes right, and everything starts swirling around, and ashes fly through the air, and they land on other people's houses, like, you gotta get the fuck out of there.
01:18:38.000 Just get out of there.
01:18:39.000 There's a storm of fire.
01:18:43.000 Alright, so I get a picture.
01:18:45.000 The last thing before I get on a plane is a picture of my garage engulfed in flames.
01:18:51.000 So I get on this plane.
01:18:53.000 I gotta take like three planes because it's like last minute booking and it's all coach.
01:18:56.000 I'm pissed.
01:18:57.000 I'm just tucked in corners on the walls.
01:19:01.000 I just fly to Dallas and to Vegas just to get there the quickest.
01:19:07.000 And it was like three flights.
01:19:09.000 So I get there.
01:19:11.000 The whole way there, I'm like, my house is burned to the ground.
01:19:14.000 You know what I mean?
01:19:14.000 I'm dealing with those whatever five stages of grief.
01:19:20.000 I'm getting to acceptance.
01:19:22.000 And then I get home.
01:19:23.000 Not even at home.
01:19:24.000 My wife and kids are at my studio.
01:19:27.000 And that's where we're laid up.
01:19:29.000 We're trying to figure out what the fuck's going on.
01:19:31.000 I can't get to the house because the whole one-on-one shut down that way.
01:19:35.000 I have to literally drive.
01:19:37.000 Up Topanga, hit the 118, take that all the way out to like the 20, whatever it is, the 3, 23?
01:19:43.000 Or the 27?
01:19:44.000 I don't know.
01:19:44.000 It's one of those.
01:19:45.000 No, it's the 23. It's like out there.
01:19:47.000 And you come back down and come around the other way.
01:19:49.000 And I was able to get to the house.
01:19:51.000 I got to the house.
01:19:52.000 I got in my house.
01:19:53.000 Literally had 20 fucking cop cars roll in because looting was fucking out of control.
01:19:58.000 We're good to go.
01:20:01.000 We're good to go.
01:20:10.000 We're good to go.
01:20:33.000 Right.
01:20:37.000 Right.
01:20:55.000 I'm grateful that my family is safe and all that and all the rest of it is replaceable stuff but I got extremely lucky.
01:21:03.000 Yeah, no, the most...
01:21:05.000 I mean, it's such a cliche thing to say that your health and your happiness and your family is the most important thing.
01:21:11.000 You know that.
01:21:12.000 Everybody knows that.
01:21:13.000 Even a fucking psychopath knows that.
01:21:15.000 But to feel it, to feel it, like in the presence of a natural fury, like fires, like wildfires, it's humbling.
01:21:22.000 And in the strangest of ways, it makes you love each other more.
01:21:26.000 It makes you nicer to people.
01:21:28.000 All my refugee friends...
01:21:32.000 You know, when we're at the hotel that night, you know, the refugees from the fire, we're all, like, closer.
01:21:38.000 We're, like, happy.
01:21:39.000 For sure.
01:21:40.000 You know, in a weird way.
01:21:41.000 You know, we're having drinks together, we're toasting, we're hugging.
01:21:45.000 We're in a hotel, hiding from a natural fury.
01:21:49.000 And you realize, like, oh, okay, we get soft when we hit a soft spot.
01:21:57.000 And that's not necessarily good for anybody.
01:21:59.000 And occasionally these horrific things that happen are good for us overall.
01:22:04.000 Because they let us appreciate, like, there's consequences.
01:22:08.000 There's consequences to living here.
01:22:10.000 There's consequences to everything being so hot and dry and never fucking raining.
01:22:15.000 And the fact that it may or may not be getting a little bit warmer.
01:22:19.000 Maybe.
01:22:20.000 Maybe.
01:22:21.000 Who gives a fuck if people have anything to do with it?
01:22:23.000 Who cares?
01:22:24.000 Let's pretend that's not even a factor.
01:22:26.000 Something's happening.
01:22:28.000 Something's happening.
01:22:29.000 We got firestorms.
01:22:30.000 Like every few years is a goddamn firestorm.
01:22:33.000 You know?
01:22:35.000 Craziness, man.
01:22:36.000 Well, we survived it, brother.
01:22:39.000 Cilancia.
01:22:40.000 Cilancia.
01:22:40.000 There's only so much shit to think about.
01:22:46.000 You having gone through that, man, have you written shit that has the touch of that on it?
01:22:57.000 I'm in a very creative state at the moment.
01:23:04.000 I don't know.
01:23:07.000 I'm sure there's elements of it in what I'm starting to play with right now.
01:23:12.000 Do you sit down and write on a piece of paper?
01:23:15.000 Or do you write while you're playing music?
01:23:16.000 For me, writing is a visual process.
01:23:20.000 Visual?
01:23:21.000 Yes.
01:23:22.000 And I can't...
01:23:23.000 If I write it down, it becomes two-dimensional.
01:23:26.000 I've written lyrics that I thought were genius and actually committed them to paper and saw them.
01:23:32.000 And it's like they dissolve from this three-dimensional beauty to like, oh, it's two-dimensional garbage.
01:23:38.000 It's fucking bizarre, I know.
01:23:40.000 It's not always reasonable, but it's my process at this point.
01:23:44.000 How's it visual?
01:23:45.000 If you really listen to my songs, they're like photograph-like.
01:23:49.000 It's like flipping through a photographic album, almost.
01:23:51.000 If you really listen to what I'm doing, it's very visual.
01:23:55.000 I see the pictures.
01:23:56.000 I equate it to like, did you ever watch the show Oz?
01:23:59.000 Sure.
01:24:00.000 Remember the poet guy who was illiterate, but he drew pictures and that's how he recited his poems, from pictures.
01:24:07.000 It's similar.
01:24:08.000 But it's kind of reverse.
01:24:10.000 It's in my brain.
01:24:11.000 It's there.
01:24:12.000 So you're saying your visual in terms of like the stories you're painting.
01:24:16.000 Like the guy outside the liquor store.
01:24:18.000 Or the imagery, yes.
01:24:19.000 Or like, you know, a song like Black Jesus where it's like just kind of cultural, like fucking pop culture reference after reference leading down a path of just like stream of consciousness pop culture references.
01:24:32.000 You know what I mean?
01:24:32.000 I'll go on tangents, you know what I mean?
01:24:34.000 But it'll be all within...
01:24:36.000 An energy inside the brain.
01:24:38.000 You know what I mean?
01:24:38.000 Once I commit them...
01:24:40.000 Even after the fact, when you turn in music to entities that shows or whatever, they want to know the lyrics so they can know if they should put it on air or this.
01:24:50.000 It depends on whatever, if it's public network.
01:24:52.000 But even when it comes to that, I have to recite it to somebody and have them type it.
01:24:59.000 It'll just kind of taint it to me.
01:25:02.000 Wow, that's interesting.
01:25:03.000 To see it written down like that.
01:25:04.000 In my hand, you know what I mean?
01:25:06.000 In another hand, it doesn't bother me, but for me to do it, it breaks a barrier of some sort.
01:25:15.000 Everything vaporizes.
01:25:17.000 So how do you capture the various beats?
01:25:21.000 Do you record it as you're coming up with it?
01:25:24.000 There's a few different ways it happens for me.
01:25:26.000 Like, you know, if I'm doing, like, a hip-hop-ish or pure hip-hop project, there'll be a beat involved always first.
01:25:33.000 You know what I mean?
01:25:33.000 There'll be somebody who have a track, and we'll be like, oh, that's the track we're going to commit to, and we'll write lyrics to it.
01:25:38.000 And it'll be just kind of, like I said, I'll drive around a lot with rap stuff and just let it bump and see what words start popping up.
01:25:46.000 I like wordplay and bouncing wordplay, but it can't just be wordplay for the sake of it.
01:25:50.000 It has to, like, tie into some sort of, like, idea.
01:25:54.000 When it comes to a song, it's usually I string together some simple chord progression and once I see something I really like, like I said, pictures will start coming up and you kind of just try to describe the picture a little bit and sometimes you come across poetry when you're describing the picture and you'll be like,
01:26:16.000 that's good.
01:26:17.000 You know what I mean?
01:26:18.000 There's a lot of like, no, that's not good.
01:26:20.000 No, that's not good.
01:26:21.000 There's a lot of that.
01:26:22.000 There's a lot of that.
01:26:22.000 It seems like a mirror process to stand-up comedy.
01:26:26.000 Like a mirror process.
01:26:27.000 Except I get to hold on to mine.
01:26:29.000 Even if they record it and make a special, I still can play mine.
01:26:32.000 And that's what I was like, man, comedians are just...
01:26:35.000 That's a little bit...
01:26:36.000 It's a different commitment because you're bringing...
01:26:39.000 It's almost like a child you're raising that you have to watch...
01:26:44.000 The life of it finish.
01:26:45.000 In a weird way.
01:26:46.000 You know what I mean?
01:26:47.000 We both have children.
01:26:48.000 That's extreme.
01:26:49.000 I know what you're saying.
01:26:51.000 You're taking this idea from kind of garbagey idea that you know there's a premise there, and then over a fucking series of fucking shows or nights or fucking maybe months, you find it with different audiences, and then you got it, and you get to rock it for maybe six months good in all these places,
01:27:11.000 and then you go and record it and make that special, if you're lucky enough to be on that level.
01:27:16.000 It's almost like I almost envy the comic.
01:27:19.000 I wonder if you guys ever envy the comic who doesn't quite have that yet so he has this bevy of material that he hasn't had to trash yet.
01:27:28.000 I just talked to Roy Wood about that.
01:27:30.000 It was just on right before you.
01:27:32.000 That's one of the things that he said, that you shouldn't do TV for like 10 years.
01:27:36.000 Have a catalog, man!
01:27:39.000 People come up with that idea that the first time you do anything that people get to see, be hardened.
01:27:45.000 To be a polished samurai of stand-up, you know, but...
01:27:49.000 I disagree.
01:27:50.000 I say let them see everything.
01:27:51.000 Let them see all the bullshit, all the stuff that sucks, all the terrible jokes.
01:27:56.000 Who cares?
01:27:56.000 Just keep going.
01:27:57.000 Especially if the progression's there.
01:27:59.000 Then it's like, oh, you see what happened.
01:28:00.000 Yeah, just keep going.
01:28:01.000 And it's good for everybody.
01:28:02.000 See, people don't want to think you're just like someone who just figured it out instantly.
01:28:06.000 No, it's good to see that you sucked.
01:28:08.000 It's good for everybody.
01:28:09.000 It might be bad for your ego, but it's good for you when your ego takes a hit.
01:28:14.000 It's always good.
01:28:15.000 It's always good.
01:28:15.000 It puts everything in perspective.
01:28:18.000 As an artist, too, the thing that gets in your way more than anything is your ego, right?
01:28:23.000 The thing that gets in your way more than anything is the way you view yourself, the way you want people to view you.
01:28:29.000 I wouldn't produce my own records until maybe two albums ago, because I felt like if I'd made it through an album without being seriously challenged, I didn't make the best record I could.
01:28:42.000 And then just being involved with a bunch of really seriously good producers, I learned to challenge myself.
01:28:48.000 And even the records I've produced for myself, there's other guys involved producing with me that I know are going to be the ones, if that's something, hey, that sucked.
01:28:59.000 You know what I mean?
01:29:00.000 You can eat that guy around.
01:29:01.000 Or even a guy just to challenge how committed you are to certain ideas.
01:29:06.000 You know what I mean?
01:29:06.000 How much time do you spend...
01:29:09.000 Going over...
01:29:10.000 Like, when you have a song and you're like, I think this song is solid.
01:29:14.000 Do you...
01:29:15.000 Outside of singing the song, do you ever go over the song and ponder, like, what you're saying or how you're saying it?
01:29:23.000 Like, how do you...
01:29:24.000 Because your stuff is so...
01:29:26.000 It's so interesting because you're telling these stories of your experiences in these songs, in a lot of them.
01:29:32.000 And you're also having fun, and you're also talking shit.
01:29:36.000 You're having a good time with them as well.
01:29:38.000 But when you decide, okay, this one is going to be recorded like this, how do you make that conclusion?
01:29:45.000 For me, it's...
01:29:47.000 Again, if there's not like...
01:29:50.000 Because I can also...
01:29:51.000 Even if I'm not doing necessarily a straight rap song, there's times when I get a track from a producer that I just love the track and I'll build something around that.
01:29:58.000 Other than that, it'll again start with a guitar and I'll either create a very rudimentary drum beat and lay down the guitar and maybe a vocal...
01:30:12.000 And I have a very unique voice.
01:30:16.000 Between the guitar and the voice, tones start appearing that resemble other instruments to me.
01:30:22.000 It almost starts telling you what to do.
01:30:24.000 Oh, I can hear a Rhodes in there.
01:30:27.000 Or the bass line should do that.
01:30:29.000 You can hear that.
01:30:30.000 And the guys I surround myself with are beasts that hear the same.
01:30:35.000 They know, oh yeah, I hear that.
01:30:37.000 A song will tell you what to do with it.
01:30:40.000 You know, if you really listen to it, I believe that.
01:30:43.000 Because I kind of, you know, one of the things Santana told me, you know, that I always held on to is like, you know, and I've experienced this once or twice where I've written very similar songs to friends of mine or people I know that was like, whoa.
01:30:58.000 Maybe not sounding, but like the idea.
01:31:00.000 Oh, wow, I wrote something that was exactly...
01:31:02.000 And he said, like, you know, we're all just antennae that are, like, catching energies and shit and, like, bringing them in and we're, you know, making something out of that energy.
01:31:11.000 And sometimes people catch that same energy and similar things happen, you know.
01:31:16.000 And so I always look at a dad...
01:31:18.000 I look at my ideas like this, but also because I don't write them down, I equate it to my children like this.
01:31:24.000 My ideas are like little animals that are wild, and I see them and I think they're amazing, and so I'll play a song until I know it so well.
01:31:36.000 It has to stick around.
01:31:38.000 I train it to stay, and if it stays the next morning, this kind of answers your question, the next day.
01:31:46.000 If I'm on to something and I write a song, I'll sing it 200 times if I get it close to done, and then I'll go to bed.
01:31:55.000 And then if it's there in the morning in the same form, I'll record it.
01:32:01.000 If it's gone, it wasn't mine.
01:32:03.000 And that's happened a lot.
01:32:05.000 Dude, that's a brave move.
01:32:07.000 I have the opposite coward's approach.
01:32:10.000 If I get an idea, I'll run away from everybody with my fingers in my ears and write it down.
01:32:16.000 Now, hear what I said.
01:32:17.000 I'll sing it 200 times.
01:32:19.000 You know what I mean?
01:32:20.000 So if I've done it 200 times and I don't wake up and know it, it's fucking trash.
01:32:25.000 I write everything down.
01:32:27.000 It's not supposed to happen.
01:32:28.000 I have the total opposite approach in terms of writing comedy.
01:32:31.000 How many specials have you made in your life?
01:32:35.000 I never counted.
01:32:37.000 Rough guess.
01:32:38.000 It's like eight or nine.
01:32:39.000 All right.
01:32:40.000 That's how many albums I've done in almost 30 years.
01:32:43.000 Yeah.
01:32:43.000 You know what I mean?
01:32:44.000 So it's like I'm not turning them out like that.
01:32:48.000 And I don't, again, because of that, there's not like this crazy archive of garbage that's going to be released when I'm dead.
01:32:55.000 It's not going to happen.
01:32:56.000 It's not going to happen.
01:32:57.000 It's not going to happen because even songs that I start to record, if I get halfway through it and I'm like not even satisfied with it, it gets erased.
01:33:04.000 Yeah.
01:33:05.000 There's a few things out there that I probably wouldn't have released, but they're like from House of Pain days.
01:33:11.000 And they're not bad.
01:33:12.000 They didn't have a purpose.
01:33:16.000 I think it's good for people to see bad shit from great artists.
01:33:22.000 I do.
01:33:22.000 I think it's good.
01:33:24.000 It's good for everybody.
01:33:25.000 I have no problem.
01:33:25.000 I mean, I'm the guy that I'll fuck up live and talk about it for five minutes at a show.
01:33:29.000 And be like, yo, at least you know it's not on fucking tape.
01:33:32.000 Right?
01:33:32.000 I'll be like, that's real shit.
01:33:34.000 You know, I'm with that.
01:33:36.000 I'm just like, it's my process.
01:33:38.000 It's like just the way I do.
01:33:39.000 Again, also I think it has to do with, I have some really hardcore producers like DJ Muggs and My man Dante Ross.
01:33:45.000 These were dudes that would be like, that fucking was garbage.
01:33:48.000 Do it again.
01:33:49.000 It's for so long that the first time now is going to be decent.
01:33:54.000 You know what I mean?
01:33:54.000 So it's like I got to push myself for it to be better than decent.
01:33:57.000 You know what I mean?
01:33:59.000 No, I get it.
01:34:00.000 Otherwise, I just clip it.
01:34:02.000 Yeah, well, that's the only way you could be as productive as you are.
01:34:06.000 You have a well-oiled approach, you know?
01:34:11.000 But I don't put out a lot of music.
01:34:13.000 Yeah, but I know for a fact that when you put something out, you're happy about it.
01:34:17.000 Oh, yeah.
01:34:19.000 I'm content.
01:34:20.000 That's when you put it out.
01:34:21.000 Content with it.
01:34:22.000 You're in a great position, man, that you can kind of sort of decide what to do and when to do it.
01:34:27.000 Writing three of the biggest songs of the 90s...
01:34:31.000 With What It's Like Jump Around and Put Your Lights On.
01:34:34.000 Well, that was 2000, I think.
01:34:35.000 But that little period, I wrote those songs, Jump Around with Mugs, What It's Like, and Put Your Lights On, totally on my own.
01:34:45.000 That provided me with something that I cherish, like some people cherish private jet rides, which is I can do whatever the fuck I want.
01:34:56.000 And still live pretty decent, not super rich guy or anything, but better than average, good life, take care of my family.
01:35:06.000 But creatively, I can do whatever the fuck I want.
01:35:09.000 And it's a beautiful thing, man.
01:35:11.000 The older I get, I'm on my whole new shit.
01:35:14.000 My slogan is, fuck it, I'm 50, man.
01:35:17.000 That's my new shit, dawg.
01:35:19.000 You ain't gonna rattle me, man.
01:35:21.000 I'm 50. I don't even care.
01:35:23.000 How's that?
01:35:24.000 Good.
01:35:25.000 I like it.
01:35:25.000 There you go.
01:35:26.000 I'm just trying to have fun, live my life, go home, hug my kids, and fucking know that nobody fucked with them at school and they had a great day and then my universe is complete.
01:35:37.000 Yes.
01:35:38.000 Yeah.
01:35:39.000 Fuck it, I'm 50. Fuck it, I'm 50. Yeah.
01:35:43.000 Beautiful.
01:35:43.000 We need more people to think like that, man.
01:35:46.000 We're wasting time doing that.
01:35:47.000 I had a heart valve replacement at 28, dude.
01:35:50.000 I didn't think I was going to make 35. You know what I mean?
01:35:53.000 Yeah.
01:35:55.000 So, 50s...
01:35:56.000 People, put that microphone on the chest.
01:35:57.000 We haven't done that in a while, so here.
01:35:59.000 Anybody who don't know, this is a heartbeat.
01:36:02.000 It's not a watch.
01:36:03.000 It's my heartbeat.
01:36:12.000 It's like a goddamn metronome.
01:36:14.000 Whoa.
01:36:18.000 It's titanium, man.
01:36:20.000 Wrap your head around that.
01:36:21.000 You know?
01:36:22.000 I got alien technology in my chest, my dude.
01:36:25.000 I hope it stays together.
01:36:26.000 I hope the doors don't fly off that thing.
01:36:28.000 Click, click, click.
01:36:30.000 That's crazy.
01:36:31.000 It's basically a very simple thing.
01:36:33.000 It's like a ring that goes in the valve, and it's like a spring kind of activated flap that...
01:36:39.000 It's totally self-propelled by the heart's pumping of the blood.
01:36:42.000 It pumps the blood out of the flap.
01:36:44.000 Then the flap kind of snaps back.
01:36:46.000 And that's what you're hearing is the tick.
01:36:48.000 It's just the spring of that.
01:36:50.000 I mean, I could take my pulse without just sitting here, dude.
01:36:53.000 I could take my pulse without even thinking about it.
01:36:56.000 Modern technology is so amazing.
01:36:59.000 St. Jude's valve.
01:37:00.000 Shout out to the St. Jude's people.
01:37:03.000 Whoever invented that shit, Gleep Glorp from the motherfucking Vega and Star System, whatever.
01:37:11.000 They can figure out a way to make your heart work again with a fake valve.
01:37:14.000 Click, click, click.
01:37:17.000 It's wild.
01:37:18.000 And that's why you're here.
01:37:20.000 That's why I'm still here, man.
01:37:21.000 It's amazing.
01:37:23.000 I often wondered afterwards, like, why?
01:37:25.000 Why did it?
01:37:25.000 Why?
01:37:27.000 John Ritter, what killed him, was exactly kind of what happened to me.
01:37:31.000 But I was able to get to the hospital faster.
01:37:34.000 Did you ever meet that guy?
01:37:35.000 No.
01:37:35.000 But I know that when it happened, people pointed it out, like, isn't that what happened to you?
01:37:39.000 I was like, oh yeah, that was.
01:37:40.000 He was a special dude.
01:37:41.000 He was on an episode of NewsRadio.
01:37:44.000 Everybody loved him.
01:37:44.000 I loved him, man.
01:37:45.000 Like, so nice.
01:37:46.000 Like, wandered around the set, like, friendly to everybody.
01:37:49.000 Like, in a weird way.
01:37:50.000 Like, he's just a genuinely really nice guy who just loved making sitcoms.
01:37:56.000 And, um, when he died, I was like, oh.
01:38:00.000 Yeah, it's one of them things that's just out of nowhere.
01:38:03.000 When you find out that someone that's, like, you feel like, ah, nothing's gonna happen to him.
01:38:07.000 He's so nice.
01:38:09.000 And then one day, the clutch...
01:38:13.000 The clutch of death.
01:38:14.000 I was told by the people at the hospital when I went back to visit once that a while after they had brought me in because it took them a minute to figure out what was wrong with me.
01:38:24.000 The only reason they figured out what was wrong with me is because my actual doctor Who's this guy in Beverly Hills?
01:38:30.000 I'm not going to say his name because I don't know if he wants that.
01:38:32.000 But he was a member on the board of Cedar Sinai.
01:38:37.000 So when they brought me in the hospital, all his records are computer accessible to them.
01:38:41.000 So they found out about my history of being born with this heart defect.
01:38:44.000 Because up until then, they heard Rock Dude, he's a musician, and they were like, alright, how much cocaine did you do?
01:38:50.000 And all my friends were telling him, he doesn't do cocaine.
01:38:53.000 And they were like, if we give him the wrong drugs, we can kill him.
01:38:56.000 And then all of a sudden, the records came through, and that's what saved my ass.
01:39:01.000 That along with the head of surgery there, the guy who did a double eight.
01:39:06.000 Nine-hour surgery came off of one, told the guys they couldn't do my surgery because it was too complex.
01:39:11.000 This guy, Dr. William Trento, he's an amazing person.
01:39:13.000 He will not mind me shouting him out.
01:39:15.000 He goes to South America and does all these free operations on kids' hearts.
01:39:18.000 He's a fucking saint.
01:39:20.000 This guy, I'll tell you off, fucking show some other shit he did that'll blow your fucking mind.
01:39:26.000 Like, wow, who does that?
01:39:29.000 But he saved my life.
01:39:32.000 Like I said, I didn't expect to be here.
01:39:35.000 50. Fuck it.
01:39:36.000 I'm 50, man.
01:39:37.000 I've got two little girls.
01:39:39.000 My whole thing right now is I want to take my girls in the next week or two over to see them.
01:39:45.000 Just to be like, yo, dude, these people wouldn't even exist if it wasn't for you, dude.
01:39:51.000 I think that would blow his mind a little bit.
01:39:52.000 Fuck yeah.
01:39:54.000 Shout out to all the people who fix hearts.
01:39:57.000 All those people.
01:39:58.000 Fix anything.
01:39:59.000 Fix all things, you know?
01:40:00.000 Fix all things.
01:40:01.000 If you fix shit, fucking salute.
01:40:03.000 Right, that's a positive thing.
01:40:05.000 Yeah.
01:40:05.000 Fix stuff.
01:40:06.000 I don't care if it's a sink or a heart.
01:40:08.000 Or a car.
01:40:08.000 If you fix it, anything in between, dude.
01:40:11.000 Yeah.
01:40:12.000 Yeah, isn't that weird?
01:40:14.000 Fixing shit is good.
01:40:15.000 Fixing hearts, though, that's like particularly good.
01:40:19.000 Like when that guy sees you on TV and shit, he's probably like...
01:40:24.000 Fix that guy.
01:40:24.000 It's been a minute, but yeah, he probably fixed that guy.
01:40:27.000 Fixed it up.
01:40:28.000 Fixed it up nice.
01:40:31.000 Fixed it up nice.
01:40:32.000 He enjoys music?
01:40:33.000 Thank you.
01:40:33.000 Then you enjoy my work.
01:40:35.000 Fuck it.
01:40:35.000 I'm going to tell this story.
01:40:36.000 I'm going to tell it.
01:40:37.000 Here's the story.
01:40:38.000 A few years after my heart surgery, like when I had my heart surgery, I didn't have medical insurance.
01:40:44.000 I was young and dumb.
01:40:44.000 I just didn't have it.
01:40:47.000 So it fucking caused a real fucking, it was like a half a million dollar fucking hit.
01:40:53.000 But I didn't declare bankruptcy.
01:40:55.000 I paid it all.
01:40:56.000 And I think this dude heard about that.
01:40:58.000 I think guys like this must somehow invest in you when they know they saved your fucking life.
01:41:04.000 There's a connection after that.
01:41:05.000 Like, that's one of my guys right there.
01:41:08.000 So, a few years later, my mom, when I was young, had, I believe, Hodgkin's disease is what it was.
01:41:14.000 And she had radiation treatment and she beat it and all that.
01:41:17.000 We're good to go.
01:41:34.000 And this guy fucking, I get all the bills.
01:41:37.000 And now I'm doing alright, so it was cool.
01:41:39.000 I get a bill from the fucking anesthesiologist.
01:41:43.000 I get a bill from the fucking operating room.
01:41:45.000 I get a bill from the hospital.
01:41:46.000 I get a bill from this.
01:41:47.000 I never got a bill from this man for my mom's surgery.
01:41:52.000 Dude just was like, nah, that one's on me.
01:41:55.000 Fucking crazy.
01:41:56.000 Who gets a surgery done on them?
01:41:58.000 Right?
01:41:59.000 That's an amazing guy.
01:42:00.000 It was crazy, dude.
01:42:01.000 That's amazing.
01:42:02.000 No, this dude goes, and then I like started looking into who he was, and this guy goes and does like fucking tons and tons of like surgeries on kids down in South America, and he's just one of them dudes, man.
01:42:12.000 Who saves your mom on the house?
01:42:16.000 What?
01:42:17.000 What?
01:42:18.000 That guy.
01:42:19.000 You saved your mom on the house.
01:42:21.000 God bless him.
01:42:22.000 God bless him.
01:42:23.000 God bless him.
01:42:24.000 Yeah, man.
01:42:26.000 There's nice people out there.
01:42:27.000 There really are.
01:42:29.000 We're fed this false narrative that everybody sucks because so many people do suck.
01:42:34.000 But there's so many people.
01:42:36.000 It's just a perspective issue.
01:42:37.000 It's the same reason why people think the world is flat.
01:42:39.000 They don't understand perspective.
01:42:41.000 The perspective when you're talking about human beings and seven billion people.
01:42:46.000 We're just overflowing with people.
01:42:48.000 There's so many of us.
01:42:49.000 There's so many stories of people sucking.
01:42:52.000 But it's all a perspective issue.
01:42:54.000 Because there's so many goddamn people.
01:42:56.000 And most of them are cool.
01:42:57.000 And most of them want to be cool.
01:42:59.000 And they would be more cool if they knew you were going to be cool.
01:43:03.000 We all agree to be cool.
01:43:04.000 We can be cool.
01:43:06.000 We can have a better time here.
01:43:07.000 We're wasting time with nonsense and arguments and conflict that all could have been disrupted from the very beginning by everybody being nice.
01:43:17.000 This is why we need the alien invasion.
01:43:20.000 Because a lot of people are invested in a lot of shit that's meaningless.
01:43:25.000 We won't even go into it.
01:43:27.000 We can all infer what those things are between us.
01:43:30.000 And the audience can do the same.
01:43:32.000 But what I'm saying is there's just too much fucking bullshit about dumb shit that we need some kind of outside fucking focus.
01:43:40.000 Yes.
01:43:42.000 100%.
01:43:42.000 Something that will take us from outside ourselves and make us focus on something else.
01:43:48.000 Or legalized mushrooms.
01:43:50.000 Which might be global warming, but that's not real, right?
01:43:54.000 No, legalized mushrooms, move to Greenland.
01:43:56.000 Trump's on it.
01:43:57.000 He's already trying to buy Greenland.
01:43:59.000 Is he trying to buy Greenland?
01:44:01.000 Dude, no!
01:44:02.000 He canceled his fucking trip to Denmark because they said they're not going to sell him Greenland.
01:44:09.000 He's talking Chet.
01:44:10.000 No, he knows what he's doing.
01:44:12.000 Listen, Trump's going to get us Greenland.
01:44:15.000 When you and I... The fucking thing is, it's like...
01:44:17.000 I believe he said...
01:44:18.000 It's like fucking...
01:44:20.000 Oh, man.
01:44:21.000 I can't...
01:44:21.000 It's a bizarro world.
01:44:22.000 That's all.
01:44:23.000 That's all.
01:44:23.000 I think people go to Greenland to bow hunt.
01:44:27.000 I think they bow hunt that gigantic fucking furry thing.
01:44:30.000 What is that thing called?
01:44:31.000 The muskox.
01:44:35.000 Google Greenland muskox.
01:44:36.000 You ever see a muskox?
01:44:38.000 No, but I want to see one and I also want to know when I'm getting invited for an elk barbecue, dude.
01:44:42.000 Come on.
01:44:43.000 You know what I mean?
01:44:44.000 I'm going to put a kitchen in here, in this place.
01:44:47.000 I have plans.
01:44:48.000 I'll tell you.
01:44:49.000 I'll come play it.
01:44:50.000 Hold, please.
01:44:51.000 Let me show you a muskox.
01:44:53.000 100% success rate on bow hunting in Greenland on a muskox.
01:44:57.000 Because you just walk right up to them.
01:44:59.000 Oh, you know what it is?
01:45:00.000 Because they have an instinct to protect themselves against wolves, so they all huddle together when threatened.
01:45:05.000 So you can just catch them all in a group?
01:45:07.000 You just walk right up to them and bow hunt them.
01:45:08.000 Yeah, but look what they look like, bro.
01:45:10.000 They don't even look real.
01:45:11.000 They look like something out of Star Wars.
01:45:13.000 Those are kind of interesting, but look, go to the side, Jamie, some of those other images.
01:45:16.000 When you see...
01:45:17.000 Yeah, they're like that.
01:45:19.000 Perfect.
01:45:19.000 You see that walking around.
01:45:20.000 You'll be like, what the fuck is that, man?
01:45:22.000 It looks like a tauntaun.
01:45:24.000 That's insane!
01:45:25.000 It looks like a lion fucked...
01:45:29.000 Elephant.
01:45:29.000 Fucked a mammoth.
01:45:31.000 What is that?
01:45:31.000 A buffalo?
01:45:32.000 What is that?
01:45:33.000 The fuck is that thing?
01:45:35.000 Those crazy ass horns.
01:45:37.000 Wild mane.
01:45:37.000 Looks like a buffalo with a Tina Turner wig.
01:45:40.000 And dude, it could be 150 million degrees below zero.
01:45:43.000 Those things just chill.
01:45:44.000 They're just out there eating frozen grass.
01:45:46.000 The horns come from like their cheekbones.
01:45:48.000 Dude, they're crazy looking.
01:45:50.000 Barely looks like a real thing.
01:45:51.000 Barely.
01:45:52.000 They're beautiful.
01:45:53.000 And apparently...
01:45:54.000 Tastes good?
01:45:55.000 Apparently it's fucking fantastic.
01:45:57.000 Yeah.
01:46:00.000 That's awesome.
01:46:01.000 My friend Brendan Burns shot one in...
01:46:04.000 I think he said he got his either in Antarctica.
01:46:07.000 You can go to really, really cold climates and get...
01:46:11.000 I think it's like...
01:46:12.000 Is it northern Canada?
01:46:14.000 There's somewhere in northern Canada where you hunt them where it's crazy.
01:46:17.000 You just get on...
01:46:20.000 You either get pulled by snowmobiles or you get pulled by dogs.
01:46:25.000 And you go, like, way, way, way the fuck out.
01:46:29.000 Where if you break down, if your snowmobile breaks down, or if your dogs all die, you are fucked.
01:46:35.000 I mean, you are so, so, so, so, so fucked.
01:46:39.000 Because there's nothing, man.
01:46:41.000 There's nothing.
01:46:41.000 There's the occasional polar bear and these fucking muskox.
01:46:45.000 And they're up there, and they don't even look like real things.
01:46:49.000 And you're stumbling across, like, imagine going through a white-out snowstorm to stumble across this 2,000-pound, enormous, gigantic, hairy, prehistoric beast that you could just walk up to and shoot with a bow and arrow and eat.
01:47:06.000 That's what's up there right now.
01:47:08.000 They're like a remnant of the past.
01:47:10.000 I want to see if they fight with those things.
01:47:14.000 They probably use it to fuck up other males.
01:47:17.000 Most of those animals, they're not fighting off predators with that shit.
01:47:21.000 It's definitely related to breeding and all that shit, for sure.
01:47:24.000 They think some of it is like in some animals depending upon how much pressure they get from predators like elk keep their antlers very late to keep their antlers like into March and April because a lot of them live around wolves and the idea is that they need those antlers to protect themselves from wolves so they hold on to them longer than deer do biology It's real.
01:47:50.000 Crazy.
01:47:51.000 Yeah.
01:47:53.000 Dude, we're so lucky.
01:47:55.000 We're so lucky we're out here.
01:47:57.000 Out the food chain?
01:47:58.000 Oh my god.
01:47:59.000 Not only out the food chain, you and I can go right down the street and get a fat steak dinner, friend.
01:48:06.000 Is that on the agenda?
01:48:07.000 I cannot this evening, but I would like to do it soon.
01:48:10.000 You know our spot?
01:48:12.000 Yeah.
01:48:12.000 I'm sparking this, man.
01:48:14.000 Oh, you're crazy!
01:48:15.000 You're living on the edge.
01:48:16.000 Do you have the lighter?
01:48:18.000 Oh, I won't do it.
01:48:19.000 You don't use a lighter?
01:48:21.000 Yeah, I'm saying.
01:48:22.000 Oh, it's right here.
01:48:22.000 Oh, okay.
01:48:23.000 I thought maybe you were one of those, I only use a mask.
01:48:26.000 And it will play into the next tune we're going to do in a minute.
01:48:29.000 They come off the top.
01:48:30.000 Yeah, they come off the top.
01:48:31.000 Sorry, I wasn't even thinking that.
01:48:33.000 Oh, it's like a helmet-y kind of thing.
01:48:35.000 I see.
01:48:36.000 I think they fuck things up with that bony part in the front above their eyebrows.
01:48:40.000 They keep those for life, too.
01:48:42.000 It's not like a deer.
01:48:43.000 You know, a deer loses their antlers every year.
01:48:45.000 These motherfuckers.
01:48:46.000 It looks like a fucked up hairdo.
01:48:51.000 It does.
01:48:52.000 They're so beautiful, though.
01:48:53.000 They're so beautiful.
01:48:54.000 Like that one right there, Jamie.
01:48:55.000 Click above.
01:48:56.000 Like their mom did their hair for church right there.
01:48:58.000 Above.
01:48:59.000 Above.
01:48:59.000 Above.
01:49:00.000 Right there.
01:49:00.000 Right there.
01:49:01.000 Right there.
01:49:01.000 Click on that.
01:49:02.000 Make it larger.
01:49:03.000 That's a beautiful creature.
01:49:04.000 I mean, it's so amazing that nature can make fish.
01:49:08.000 It can make an eagle.
01:49:10.000 It's a type of buffalo, yes.
01:49:11.000 And it can make that.
01:49:11.000 Like buffalo or?
01:49:13.000 I don't know, man.
01:49:14.000 What is it?
01:49:14.000 Bison related?
01:49:15.000 Ox.
01:49:16.000 It's an ox.
01:49:17.000 Must ox.
01:49:18.000 Aren't they all related?
01:49:19.000 Bison and all that?
01:49:21.000 I wish I knew.
01:49:23.000 Kids facts.
01:49:25.000 Kids facts?
01:49:27.000 What does it say?
01:49:28.000 It's cattle.
01:49:30.000 Often compared to cattle.
01:49:32.000 It's like a cow with a big coat.
01:49:34.000 Yeah.
01:49:35.000 That's a northern cow.
01:49:36.000 It's an herbivore.
01:49:37.000 Yeah, there you go.
01:49:38.000 Wow.
01:49:38.000 Furry highland cow.
01:49:39.000 Part of the Bovedae family.
01:49:42.000 All the species in this family have two toed hooves, four chambered stomachs, and are herbivores.
01:49:48.000 So it's like a kind of cow type thing.
01:49:52.000 Fuck, it's amazing.
01:49:53.000 You think aliens mutate them?
01:49:54.000 Nope.
01:49:55.000 Nope.
01:49:56.000 That's what we're supposed to be right now.
01:49:58.000 What we're supposed to be right now is some sort of stupid, fucking hairy, dumbass that's running around getting eaten by shit.
01:50:03.000 But the aliens came down and said, listen, let's just plant some of our stuff in these monkeys and see what we can do.
01:50:09.000 I'm in, dude.
01:50:09.000 When are they coming back?
01:50:10.000 That's what happened, man.
01:50:11.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:50:11.000 When are they coming back?
01:50:12.000 Probably pretty soon.
01:50:13.000 Soon.
01:50:13.000 It's got to be, dude.
01:50:14.000 I feel like it's been brought up more and more in the narrative, and every time we go to sleep, we wake up in a new universe.
01:50:19.000 And I think along those lines that...
01:50:22.000 They're coming.
01:50:23.000 They're on the way right now.
01:50:24.000 Which is not quite ready yet.
01:50:26.000 Everlast.
01:50:26.000 Maybe you are.
01:50:27.000 But some people are not.
01:50:29.000 Some people, if the aliens were hovering over Universal Studios right now...
01:50:32.000 Lose they minds.
01:50:33.000 Lose they minds.
01:50:35.000 Moving down to 101...
01:50:38.000 Over the Hollywood Bowl.
01:50:39.000 It'd be amazing.
01:50:40.000 And those little fucking times.
01:50:43.000 Whether it was the end or the beginning or whatever, it would be amazing.
01:50:47.000 It would be very interesting.
01:50:48.000 The whole thing would go down, you know what I mean?
01:50:50.000 If it was the end of all, cool.
01:50:53.000 Yeah.
01:50:53.000 I mean, I'm not saying, hey, break it off, but I'm saying, if that's what it is, it is.
01:50:58.000 Or if it's the next stage of enlightenment and fucking all that goodness, cool.
01:51:03.000 What do you think people would do if one of them hovered over every major city?
01:51:09.000 You know what I think?
01:51:10.000 What we're talking about is what would the majorly religious do?
01:51:14.000 Because I think that would affect religious thought the most right off top.
01:51:20.000 You know what I mean?
01:51:21.000 Besides the fear of like, what are they here for?
01:51:24.000 The first thing was like, whoa, a whole bunch of ideology goes out the fucking window right now.
01:51:31.000 You know what I mean?
01:51:32.000 So that would cause a lot of panic and anxiety right there alone.
01:51:36.000 You know, you tell them your whatever story of whatever religion.
01:51:40.000 I'm not going to even go there.
01:51:42.000 I like that thing.
01:51:44.000 Let's blanket it.
01:51:46.000 It's going to upset a lot of folk.
01:51:48.000 You know what I mean?
01:51:49.000 Right away.
01:51:50.000 Just like, oh my God.
01:51:51.000 That's not what we thought existed.
01:51:53.000 We're the center of everything.
01:51:55.000 You know what I think would happen?
01:51:56.000 I think people would just start fucking...
01:51:58.000 Flat earthers go out the window right away.
01:52:01.000 That just is over.
01:52:02.000 Maybe not.
01:52:03.000 Maybe the aliens travel here from another dimension and they have a new explanation for it.
01:52:07.000 The thing about being a flat earther or the thing about any kind of thing that you could decide was already proven is that it doesn't matter what the facts are anymore.
01:52:17.000 What matters is what people agree to.
01:52:20.000 That's what's interesting about it.
01:52:21.000 You realize that there's a certain number of people you need to have to start a community, and it doesn't have to make sense.
01:52:27.000 You just have to have enough people that agree to it.
01:52:29.000 If enough people agree to it, you can push some pretty preposterous ideas through, and a bunch of people hop on board, and they're happy to be on your group.
01:52:40.000 That's the problem with groups.
01:52:41.000 The problem with groups is people will just join the groups.
01:52:44.000 Isn't that the big lie?
01:52:45.000 The big lie thing.
01:52:47.000 The whole Mein Kampf.
01:52:48.000 Yep.
01:52:49.000 Big lie theory.
01:52:50.000 I believe that's where I'm quoting that from.
01:52:53.000 I mean, even if you think about a country, right?
01:52:56.000 You think about a country and you think about America, which we both love and live in.
01:53:00.000 Yes, sir.
01:53:03.000 What is it?
01:53:04.000 It's an idea.
01:53:06.000 It's an idea.
01:53:07.000 It's an idea that everybody who's in this thing is cool to each other.
01:53:11.000 Everybody who's in this thing is part of a team.
01:53:13.000 That's really what it is.
01:53:15.000 Bring us your broken masses and all that stuff from the Statue of Liberty.
01:53:20.000 I think about this thing.
01:53:22.000 Four huddled masses?
01:53:25.000 It's been a while.
01:53:26.000 I'm fucking 50. Right, but I know what you're saying.
01:53:32.000 It's like whatever we are.
01:53:34.000 We are what we agree we are.
01:53:36.000 We are what we agree we are.
01:53:40.000 Most of what we're in conflict about is fucking stupid.
01:53:44.000 And as a country, we're supposed to agree that we're all in this together.
01:53:48.000 So if we're all in this together, it should be good for everybody.
01:53:51.000 We can do that.
01:53:53.000 We can do that better than we think we can.
01:53:55.000 Way better.
01:53:56.000 Way better.
01:53:57.000 Absolutely.
01:53:57.000 But the problem is the conflict.
01:53:59.000 Some of it's unnecessary, man.
01:54:02.000 That's a good sound effect for that moment.
01:54:05.000 Perfect.
01:54:06.000 You know, some of it is just unnecessary.
01:54:09.000 And it's these moments, man.
01:54:11.000 It's moments when we have fun.
01:54:13.000 Moments when we get together.
01:54:14.000 Moments when we hug.
01:54:15.000 Moments when we have a drink together.
01:54:17.000 Moments when we listen to some music.
01:54:19.000 Moments when we're all leaving a concert together or a movie together that we realize, like, we're all in this together.
01:54:24.000 We're alright.
01:54:26.000 It's just like, we just gotta navigate it better.
01:54:28.000 That's all it is.
01:54:28.000 We're crashing into each other.
01:54:30.000 Honestly, it goes moments we mourn together.
01:54:33.000 I mean, honestly, I mean, I hate to say this, but, you know, I see a lot of my older friends more at funerals lately than other events.
01:54:41.000 But they turn into celebrations, you know what I mean?
01:54:43.000 Because we all understand, like, all right, man.
01:54:46.000 Yeah.
01:54:47.000 Hey, I'm glad I am seeing you right now.
01:54:49.000 Let's fucking...
01:54:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:54:51.000 And whoever it was that we're celebrating definitely doesn't want that.
01:54:55.000 They want this.
01:54:56.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:54:57.000 I don't.
01:54:58.000 When I go party the fuck up, party the fuck up and say, that guy did aight.
01:55:03.000 He did aight.
01:55:04.000 He was a pretty good dad.
01:55:05.000 Made a few bucks.
01:55:08.000 Made a few bucks.
01:55:09.000 That's Dana, man.
01:55:10.000 Dana just played that song no matter what.
01:55:12.000 I mean, God love it.
01:55:12.000 I gotta get my 25 cents, man.
01:55:14.000 I gotta get my 25 cents every episode, dog.
01:55:17.000 Man, come on.
01:55:17.000 You begrudging me my 25 cents?
01:55:19.000 I love it.
01:55:20.000 I love it.
01:55:21.000 I was walking out of the octagon.
01:55:23.000 I forget who...
01:55:25.000 Who I was interviewing.
01:55:25.000 My favorite is this.
01:55:27.000 Every once in a while.
01:55:28.000 Like, there's a few people who choose that song.
01:55:30.000 Like, Cynthia Cavillo.
01:55:32.000 Well, let's shout out to the first.
01:55:34.000 Marcus Davis.
01:55:35.000 Yeah, Marcus Davis.
01:55:36.000 He did the first thing, and then he went into the Jump Around.
01:55:40.000 But some people, every once in a while, I don't know, maybe if they picked a bad song or something.
01:55:44.000 Like, out of nowhere, one time, like, Lyoto Machida came out to Jump Around, and I'm like...
01:55:49.000 I texted Dana.
01:55:50.000 I was like, who the fuck picked that?
01:55:52.000 He's like, I did.
01:55:53.000 And he didn't go any further.
01:55:55.000 And I was like, oh, he must have picked the song Dana Hated or something.
01:55:58.000 Well, some of these cats, they'll choose music.
01:56:01.000 And Dana was like, nah.
01:56:03.000 And I think the go-to jam, if you fucking pick something he doesn't like, is Jump Around.
01:56:11.000 Because I'll be like, that was random, man.
01:56:13.000 I was like, how did that happen?
01:56:16.000 It's funny.
01:56:16.000 It's funny when there's a song that plays all the time and connects you to one of your friends.
01:56:20.000 It's like, as I'm walking out of the octagon, it's like...
01:56:26.000 There was a period of about six years where anywhere Dana was, he could be on the other side of the world, I'm sleeping somewhere, I'd get a phone call and it'd just be a phone in the air at a club.
01:56:42.000 I'd be like, dude, come on.
01:56:45.000 You guys nailed that song so hard.
01:56:48.000 There's moments in space-time that get nailed.
01:56:52.000 You just hit something that resonates with people.
01:56:58.000 I steal Danny Boy's quote of, it's the Louie Louie of the 90s.
01:57:04.000 It's Louie Louie.
01:57:06.000 It's just there.
01:57:07.000 It's almost not mine anymore.
01:57:10.000 It belongs to the universe.
01:57:12.000 It's weird.
01:57:14.000 Every ball game I go to, any event I go to, it gets played.
01:57:18.000 And it's not even a big deal.
01:57:21.000 Some places it's a big deal.
01:57:22.000 You get these football games, college shit, like Wisconsin's and stuff, where it's part of a tradition.
01:57:27.000 But I'm saying any event, an Angels game, a Dodgers game, a Yankees game, a Laker game, a football game, it pops up somewhere along the line.
01:57:37.000 Dude, you're right up there with Queens.
01:57:39.000 It's crazy.
01:57:40.000 It's wild.
01:57:41.000 I mean, you're talking about individual songs and their imprint on something.
01:57:46.000 It's bananas.
01:57:47.000 It's something to like...
01:57:49.000 You can't almost invest your thought in it because it can get like, whoa.
01:57:54.000 It's really kind of a part of pop culture.
01:57:58.000 It's ingrained on an American phenomenon.
01:58:03.000 And worldwide...
01:58:05.000 Worldwide.
01:58:06.000 I mean, where can you go where they probably never heard Jump Around?
01:58:10.000 It's weird.
01:58:11.000 I mean, to think about it on that level is crazy.
01:58:14.000 Maybe like one of them places where Trump's trying to buy.
01:58:16.000 Maybe up in Greenland?
01:58:17.000 No.
01:58:18.000 They heard it.
01:58:21.000 They heard it.
01:58:22.000 Queen had We Are the Champions.
01:58:26.000 And it also had We Will Rock You.
01:58:28.000 Those are two of the greatest sports anthems of all time.
01:58:31.000 Queen nailed two of them.
01:58:33.000 Like, what other fucking band has two of them?
01:58:35.000 We Will Rock You and We Are The Champions.
01:58:37.000 It's actually the same song, too.
01:58:40.000 Is it the same song?
01:58:41.000 Isn't it?
01:58:41.000 Yeah, they blend into each other.
01:58:43.000 Oh, but they're two different songs.
01:58:44.000 Technically?
01:58:45.000 They're technically connected.
01:58:46.000 Like, if you had to buy them on iTunes, you'd have to buy two songs.
01:58:49.000 I think, is it a Slash in there?
01:58:51.000 Is it a We Will Rock You and We Are The Champions?
01:58:52.000 They come together?
01:58:55.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:58:56.000 There's no space.
01:58:57.000 Was it two and three, or was it recognized as one individual song?
01:59:00.000 On the label, it was listed as two different titles.
01:59:03.000 Two different titles.
01:59:04.000 You're not mic'd up.
01:59:05.000 People can't hear you, so I'm trying to...
01:59:07.000 Oh, okay.
01:59:07.000 Sorry.
01:59:08.000 Here we go.
01:59:11.000 Sorry.
01:59:11.000 DJ, man.
01:59:12.000 So that was actually one of the first albums I got when I was a kid, but on the actual label...
01:59:30.000 No, it usually gives you both.
01:59:35.000 It gives you both.
01:59:38.000 Remember, man?
01:59:38.000 Diner music?
01:59:40.000 Yeah.
01:59:40.000 I was listening to...
01:59:41.000 I feel like my memory...
01:59:43.000 Get that microphone on.
01:59:43.000 I feel like my memory...
01:59:45.000 I'll share with you.
01:59:46.000 I feel like my memory...
01:59:47.000 I see a We Will Rock You slash We Are The Champions thing going on in that kind of sense.
01:59:53.000 I feel like you would have got both songs.
01:59:55.000 I don't remember.
01:59:56.000 There is no stop.
01:59:57.000 There's not even a clean place to edit it, really, if I'm right.
02:00:01.000 It's crazy that it's two songs.
02:00:02.000 Do you remember those wheels of the diners in the East Coast that would roll?
02:00:05.000 Yeah, it's kind of a slash.
02:00:08.000 Oh, so it's two songs.
02:00:11.000 It's two different songs.
02:00:12.000 It's two songs, but it's one.
02:00:14.000 So I was just driving a 45. It only has We Will Rock You on one side.
02:00:18.000 That's interesting.
02:00:21.000 I was driving a U-Haul truck last weekend.
02:00:23.000 I'm in the process of moving.
02:00:24.000 So all we had was AM, FM radio.
02:00:27.000 So I was listening to K-Earth 101, and We Will Rock You came on, and right away came We Are the Champions.
02:00:32.000 They played it as one song.
02:00:36.000 Well, they go together, you know, perfectly.
02:00:40.000 It seems like it's almost, but it is clearly two different jams, right?
02:00:44.000 It's great.
02:00:46.000 It's similar themes, though.
02:00:47.000 He was a goddamn wizard.
02:00:49.000 We will rock you, we are the champions.
02:00:51.000 That band, they were really sorcerers.
02:00:55.000 He was amazing.
02:00:56.000 Freddie Mercury was wild.
02:00:58.000 He was amazing.
02:00:58.000 He was so unusual.
02:01:00.000 He was strut on stage.
02:01:02.000 I mean, it was just a masterpiece of Bohemian Rhapsody alone.
02:01:05.000 It's just crazy.
02:01:06.000 I know, right?
02:01:07.000 When you think of rock albums, and you think of songs, and you think of that one, you're like, what?
02:01:13.000 What is that?
02:01:13.000 I write these little three chord songs with a nice story over it and shit.
02:01:17.000 And this dude was doing like fucking 16 part harmonies of Bismillah.
02:01:23.000 No, we will not let you go.
02:01:24.000 Like wrote like a rock opera like within four or five minutes.
02:01:28.000 It's fucking bananas how genius that shit is.
02:01:31.000 And it's great to listen to.
02:01:33.000 Like it's super entertaining.
02:01:35.000 It's captivating.
02:01:37.000 He was a goddamn...
02:01:40.000 Goddamn hero.
02:01:43.000 For sure, right?
02:01:44.000 Freddy.
02:01:45.000 I haven't seen the movie.
02:01:47.000 I haven't either.
02:01:48.000 I haven't seen the movie, though.
02:01:49.000 After they stopped having fucking Borat do it, I'm like, I'm out.
02:01:54.000 See, because I like to show that guy's on, that Mr. Robot.
02:01:58.000 I'm sure I'd like him too, but it doesn't matter.
02:02:01.000 Once you tease me with Ali G, and then you pull him away.
02:02:06.000 I don't know.
02:02:07.000 I mean, that's not why I didn't see it.
02:02:08.000 I just haven't had the chance.
02:02:10.000 I heard that Borat wanted to do a lot of crazy drugs, gay sex, chaos.
02:02:15.000 Yeah, he probably wanted to have dongs flapping around.
02:02:19.000 You know what I mean?
02:02:19.000 He wanted to go the dark side of Freddy's.
02:02:23.000 He wanted to be buck wild.
02:02:24.000 I'm sure the guy who did it did a great job.
02:02:25.000 The problem is whenever someone gets attached to the idea of someone else doing it, and then the new guy comes in, he's forever tainted.
02:02:31.000 But if you haven't, and you ever go on TV little show binges, that guy's show, Mr. Robot, it's pretty fucking good.
02:02:40.000 It's pretty fucking good.
02:02:41.000 I've heard it's really funny.
02:02:43.000 It's fucking bizarre, futuristic hacker weirdness.
02:02:47.000 It's pretty dope.
02:02:48.000 Dude, this is the best time ever if you want to just sit and watch TV. Is there a better time that's ever existed?
02:02:54.000 No, dude.
02:02:54.000 Smoke weed.
02:02:55.000 It's legal.
02:02:57.000 Watch 42 episodes of a show.
02:02:59.000 I don't encourage too much of this behavior, but occasionally I think it's important and probably even therapeutical.
02:03:05.000 But if you could just sit down and watch something on TV, there's more shit to watch today than the human race has ever seen, ever.
02:03:12.000 That's a fact.
02:03:13.000 They're making new TV shows every goddamn minute.
02:03:15.000 They're happening right now.
02:03:16.000 They're putting them out on Hulu.
02:03:18.000 They're putting them out on Amazon.
02:03:19.000 They're putting them out on Netflix.
02:03:20.000 They don't even stagger them.
02:03:22.000 They drop an entire season.
02:03:24.000 Boom!
02:03:24.000 It's out.
02:03:25.000 Watch it.
02:03:26.000 Deal with it.
02:03:27.000 Deal with it, bitch.
02:03:28.000 You watch Stranger Things?
02:03:29.000 Yes.
02:03:30.000 I'm on episode five.
02:03:31.000 Don't tell me shit.
02:03:32.000 Of what?
02:03:33.000 The most recent season?
02:03:34.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:03:35.000 Hush.
02:03:35.000 Everybody hush.
02:03:36.000 It's good.
02:03:36.000 It's good.
02:03:37.000 It's good.
02:03:37.000 I enjoy it.
02:03:38.000 I enjoy it.
02:03:38.000 I can't tell you I enjoy it?
02:03:39.000 Don't get blasphemous.
02:03:40.000 No, I ain't gonna tell you anything else.
02:03:42.000 A little bit better than good.
02:03:43.000 I'll tell you a couple good ones I enjoy.
02:03:45.000 A couple good ones I enjoy.
02:03:46.000 You fuck with Ozark.
02:03:48.000 Oh, dude.
02:03:49.000 Dude, I fucked with Ozark.
02:03:49.000 Okay, there we go.
02:03:50.000 There's Ozark.
02:03:51.000 Oh, man.
02:03:52.000 If I had to give up one, it wouldn't be Ozark.
02:03:54.000 They canceled it, but the seasons that exist are fucking hilarious.
02:03:58.000 Have you watched this Santa Clarita Diet?
02:04:00.000 No.
02:04:01.000 It's with Drew Barrymore and the guy from Timothy Oliphant from Deadwood, that guy.
02:04:11.000 I'm not even going to say anything else, but y'all can come thank me later.
02:04:14.000 Go check that shit out.
02:04:16.000 It's like two seasons of it and they cancelled it for some reason.
02:04:18.000 Hopefully they'll bring it back if enough people like it.
02:04:20.000 I'm telling you, it's fucking hilarious.
02:04:22.000 If you like zombie kind of weirdness, but it ain't really scary.
02:04:25.000 It's fucking hilarious is what it is.
02:04:27.000 It's craziness.
02:04:28.000 Beautiful.
02:04:29.000 Have you ever watched Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt?
02:04:32.000 I have not.
02:04:33.000 Gotta watch that.
02:04:33.000 I'll check it out.
02:04:34.000 That is a goddamn hilarious show.
02:04:36.000 That's a good show to sit down with your wife.
02:04:38.000 Because you'll laugh your ass off and she'll love it.
02:04:41.000 Listen, it's hilarious.
02:04:42.000 It's about a lady who was in a cult and she got locked up in a basement for like 13 years and then she got out and she doesn't know what the fuck anything is.
02:04:50.000 But she's hilariously optimistic.
02:04:52.000 It's really fun.
02:04:52.000 My wife got me on this one.
02:04:54.000 It's not that, but it's like this lady, like chick comic, and I don't know her name, and I don't know the name of the show right now, but it's fucking hilarious, and she's like a Larry David-esque chick.
02:05:02.000 Like she's Larry David-esque, I should say.
02:05:04.000 Like the show is like, she's always like the fucking mom who's like fucking doing some crazy shit.
02:05:09.000 There's like an episode of like where there's a mom amongst the crew that's like done porno, and so all the moms are talking about it, but like the fucking show's hilarious.
02:05:16.000 What is this show?
02:05:17.000 Oh man, I can't remember.
02:05:19.000 Do you know what that is, Jamie?
02:05:20.000 I've got to think of the show.
02:05:21.000 Who's in it?
02:05:22.000 Who are the actresses?
02:05:22.000 I don't know.
02:05:23.000 That's what I'm saying.
02:05:24.000 I've watched shit with my wife sometimes, and I'm just going to get the name of it real quick while we're here.
02:05:29.000 Are you talking about The Handmaid's Tale?
02:05:30.000 No.
02:05:32.000 No, it's definitely not that.
02:05:38.000 It's something like no apologies or something about apologies.
02:05:41.000 Sorry, not sorry.
02:05:42.000 Sorry, not sorry.
02:05:43.000 Thank you.
02:05:44.000 Fucking shit is hilarious, dude.
02:05:45.000 That lady is a fucking hilarious.
02:05:47.000 Who's that?
02:05:48.000 I don't know her name.
02:05:49.000 I'm sorry.
02:05:50.000 Andrea Savage.
02:05:51.000 There you go.
02:05:51.000 She sounds savage.
02:05:52.000 She's fucking funny, dude.
02:05:53.000 It is savage.
02:05:54.000 The show's pretty savage.
02:05:55.000 But it's like some dirty Larry David kind of vibes.
02:05:58.000 What kind of a burden do you have with a name like Savage?
02:06:01.000 Like, you better produce.
02:06:02.000 You can't run around and be lazy with a name like Savage.
02:06:04.000 Yeah, you can't.
02:06:04.000 You can't.
02:06:05.000 You gotta bring it.
02:06:06.000 Bob Savage.
02:06:08.000 Bob Savage is sitting there smelling his own farts.
02:06:12.000 What?
02:06:13.000 I just...
02:06:14.000 I don't know.
02:06:14.000 Jamie's in a panic.
02:06:15.000 I googled that.
02:06:16.000 I just googled that, sorry not sorry, with Amanda Savage, and nothing came up then.
02:06:20.000 Oh.
02:06:20.000 I had an article up there.
02:06:22.000 That's definitely it, because I've known my...
02:06:23.000 That's why I was saying apologies or something.
02:06:25.000 Sorry not sorry.
02:06:26.000 This is the article I had.
02:06:27.000 There she goes.
02:06:27.000 That's her.
02:06:28.000 Oh, she's fucking hilarious, man.
02:06:31.000 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
02:06:34.000 The show's called I'm Sorry.
02:06:35.000 The article is titled Sorry Not Sorry.
02:06:37.000 Yeah, okay, there you go.
02:06:38.000 I knew it was an apology or something like that.
02:06:40.000 God, we're stupid.
02:06:41.000 It's fucking hilarious.
02:06:42.000 We're done.
02:06:42.000 We did the least research of any show ever that has this kind of reach.
02:06:47.000 But you guys are winging it kind of in a lot of ways, dude.
02:06:50.000 It's the beauty of the show, though, a little bit.
02:06:53.000 This thing is 100% winged.
02:06:55.000 You want some of this?
02:06:56.000 I'm sitting on a little bit, but yeah.
02:06:58.000 Okay.
02:07:04.000 Don't be scared, homie.com.
02:07:05.000 Shout out to Nate Diaz, victorious.
02:07:08.000 Shout out to Anthony Pettis, the gladiator.
02:07:11.000 It was a good fight.
02:07:12.000 It was a great fight.
02:07:13.000 I totally agree with the outcome.
02:07:16.000 Yes.
02:07:16.000 Oh, definitely.
02:07:17.000 Definitely.
02:07:17.000 Nate won that fight for sure.
02:07:19.000 I was complimented when I walked into Dana's green room and was told I smelled like I just came from Nate Diaz's camp.
02:07:28.000 Yes, it was amazing.
02:07:30.000 I love that.
02:07:32.000 Thank God for that guy.
02:07:33.000 The fucks given is like at an all-time low.
02:07:36.000 All-time low.
02:07:37.000 Thank God for that guy.
02:07:38.000 He's so important.
02:07:38.000 Just be you.
02:07:39.000 Yeah.
02:07:40.000 Love that guy.
02:07:41.000 That's what he's doing.
02:07:42.000 I mean, he's fighting for the baddest motherfucker in the game belt.
02:07:44.000 That was at 170, right?
02:07:45.000 Yes.
02:07:46.000 Yes.
02:07:47.000 Yeah, fuck cutting weight.
02:07:48.000 He doesn't need to cut weight.
02:07:49.000 But I love when he's talking about fighting for the baddest motherfucker in the game belt.
02:07:53.000 Yeah.
02:07:55.000 So that's the belt he's referring to.
02:07:57.000 Okay.
02:07:57.000 Because I was like, this was for a belt?
02:07:59.000 It was only three rounds.
02:08:00.000 I was like, wait a minute.
02:08:01.000 I'm so confused.
02:08:02.000 I was thinking about...
02:08:03.000 I was a little high and drunk myself.
02:08:05.000 No, I was thinking about trying to get him to explain that to people, but I was like, I'm going to just let him go.
02:08:09.000 I don't even want to get in the way of this.
02:08:10.000 I'm glad I know now what belt he's talking about.
02:08:13.000 Yeah, he's talked about it multiple times.
02:08:14.000 That's a great fight he called out, though.
02:08:16.000 But he said that.
02:08:16.000 He said, defend this belt.
02:08:17.000 And I was like, okay, he's talking about the baddest motherfucker in the game belt.
02:08:20.000 And I thought he was going to say it, but...
02:08:23.000 I probably should have asked him what belt it was.
02:08:25.000 No, it's more beautiful like that there's like this...
02:08:28.000 No, it's perfect.
02:08:29.000 It's like an Easter egg.
02:08:31.000 What a great name.
02:08:33.000 The baddest motherfucker in the game, Belt.
02:08:39.000 We should be so happy that guy's a real thing.
02:08:41.000 We should be so happy.
02:08:43.000 And that fight, it would be amazing.
02:08:45.000 Yeah, man.
02:08:45.000 That would be incredible.
02:08:47.000 Masvidal's a straight-up murderer.
02:08:49.000 He's a straight-up murderer.
02:08:50.000 So is Nate.
02:08:51.000 That would be chaos.
02:08:52.000 That would be chaos.
02:08:53.000 And those two guys want to do it.
02:08:55.000 Those are two, I mean, just wild dogs going at it.
02:08:59.000 Those guys are both, like, to the core.
02:09:02.000 They're fighters to the core.
02:09:04.000 There's no quitting.
02:09:05.000 Either one of those guys.
02:09:08.000 I mean, that's a wild fight, man.
02:09:10.000 Especially right now, like financially, that's an amazing fight right now.
02:09:14.000 People would pay a lot of money to see that fight.
02:09:17.000 Maz Vidal and Nate Diaz, those are two guys that are like the most exciting and most talked about guys in the sport right now.
02:09:25.000 If those guys decided to fucking smash horns, whoo!
02:09:30.000 It looked like they were more than willing.
02:09:33.000 Yeah.
02:09:33.000 I hope they make that.
02:09:35.000 That would be an amazing fight.
02:09:36.000 I hope they make that happen.
02:09:38.000 That would be goddamn bananas.
02:09:39.000 And maybe one of them will come out to jump around.
02:09:42.000 If they pick something shitty enough.
02:09:46.000 No, they're level.
02:09:47.000 I think they get to pick their own music.
02:09:49.000 As long as they don't have, like, Christina Aguilera.
02:09:50.000 Yeah, but we're talking about, wait, wait.
02:09:52.000 But Lyoto Machida.
02:09:54.000 Yeah.
02:09:54.000 Like, I want to know the story behind that.
02:09:56.000 One day I'm going to corner Dana when we're like, you know, when he's not the fucking busiest dude on earth.
02:10:00.000 Yeah.
02:10:01.000 And be like, what the fuck?
02:10:03.000 What happened there?
02:10:03.000 What song did he pick?
02:10:05.000 You were mad.
02:10:06.000 Which Lyoto fight was that?
02:10:07.000 I don't know, man.
02:10:08.000 I'm sure somebody knows.
02:10:09.000 But I wonder if he won.
02:10:11.000 Because that would be interesting to see if he fucked with his vibe.
02:10:14.000 I'm not sure.
02:10:15.000 I think he did.
02:10:16.000 Because I keep track of shit like that.
02:10:19.000 Because it's fucking...
02:10:19.000 I hate it almost when somebody...
02:10:21.000 Because one of my favorite guys...
02:10:25.000 Uh, uh, [...]
02:10:40.000 uh, [...
02:10:53.000 That's when Lyoto...
02:10:54.000 See, he put the kibosh on Lyoto.
02:10:56.000 Oh, so, yeah.
02:10:57.000 See?
02:10:58.000 See?
02:10:59.000 Look, man, I didn't ask for that.
02:11:01.000 I didn't fucking ask for that, dude.
02:11:05.000 I don't need that pressure.
02:11:07.000 That wasn't going to save him.
02:11:07.000 Don't pick my shit.
02:11:08.000 A song wasn't going to save him.
02:11:10.000 You know what I mean?
02:11:11.000 That's one of those weird ones.
02:11:12.000 It's like, how bad is a song?
02:11:14.000 You won't let a person pick their own song?
02:11:16.000 That's what I want to know!
02:11:17.000 It's not that much time.
02:11:19.000 I mean, it's only like the walk to the Oxagon is not a full song.
02:11:22.000 It's not like three minutes.
02:11:23.000 But all those Brazilian guys always come out to the...
02:11:26.000 You know what I mean?
02:11:28.000 Like fucking...
02:11:29.000 They come out to the fucking wildest music, some of those dudes.
02:11:33.000 The axe murderer used to come out to some real questionable fucking, like, Dutch disco house.
02:11:40.000 He did it!
02:11:42.000 He did!
02:11:43.000 He did!
02:11:43.000 He came out to, like, raw techno.
02:11:46.000 You crazy.
02:11:47.000 Oh, my God.
02:11:48.000 Yeah, that's right.
02:11:49.000 Dutch disco house.
02:11:50.000 Swedish house mafia.
02:11:53.000 Oh, my God.
02:11:56.000 You're so right.
02:11:58.000 Crazy.
02:12:00.000 That's exactly what he's coming out to.
02:12:04.000 Like, overtly, like, over the top, too.
02:12:09.000 Sandstorm.
02:12:09.000 Number one worst walk-out song.
02:12:11.000 I said number one.
02:12:14.000 Worst.
02:12:17.000 My favorite was when Randy Couture came out to Ted Nugent's Stranglehold.
02:12:22.000 I was like, if there is ever a song that's like, that seems like a fight, that's a fight playing song.
02:12:29.000 You know, like, you're about to have a fight, that's the song you want playing.
02:12:33.000 Stranglehold.
02:12:34.000 Michael Chiesa uses that too.
02:12:36.000 A couple guys use Stranglehold now.
02:12:38.000 That's a song, like, Stranglehold.
02:12:41.000 And it's one of those songs.
02:12:43.000 Anything by ACDC. Oh yeah.
02:12:46.000 Thunderstruck.
02:12:47.000 Come out to a fight.
02:12:48.000 Cool.
02:12:48.000 Yeah.
02:12:49.000 Just that.
02:12:49.000 Angus' tone on the guitar.
02:12:52.000 It's over.
02:12:53.000 You got anger.
02:12:53.000 Yeah.
02:12:54.000 Right?
02:12:55.000 You got some nice...
02:12:56.000 I'm on the highway to hell!
02:13:00.000 Rich Franklin used to come out to Thunderstruck when he was the middleweight champion.
02:13:04.000 Thunderstruck!
02:13:12.000 Is that the song he came out to?
02:13:13.000 I know he definitely came out to an ACDC song.
02:13:16.000 I think it is.
02:13:17.000 It feels like right.
02:13:18.000 Questioning.
02:13:19.000 That was big like right then, too.
02:13:21.000 Yeah.
02:13:22.000 ACDC is like one of those bands where you hear like three or four chords.
02:13:26.000 You're like, ACDC. Like instantly.
02:13:29.000 Like for sure.
02:13:29.000 Angus Young, again, his guitar tone.
02:13:32.000 The song was called For Those About to Rock.
02:13:34.000 Oh, he came out to For Those About to Rock.
02:13:37.000 But didn't he come out to Thunderstruck, too?
02:13:39.000 I think when he fought Anderson Silva, he came out to Thunderstruck.
02:13:42.000 Which fight was that?
02:13:47.000 Who was he fighting?
02:13:48.000 I think for sure he came out to Thunderstruck.
02:13:50.000 Google is your friend.
02:13:52.000 He was an ACDC dude.
02:13:54.000 Oh, when he fought Forrest Griffin.
02:13:55.000 He was an ACDC dude.
02:13:59.000 You think about walkout music.
02:14:01.000 It's big, man.
02:14:02.000 You can't deny someone their walkout music.
02:14:04.000 Was it Chuck Liddell he beat with a broken arm?
02:14:07.000 Chuck kicked him in the arm and broke it.
02:14:09.000 I feel like I was there, but I might have just been seeing it on TV. It depends on where it was.
02:14:14.000 I don't know.
02:14:15.000 Chuck broke his arm in the first round, and then he clipped him with a punch with his other hand.
02:14:20.000 He even punched him with his broken arm.
02:14:21.000 That was crazy.
02:14:23.000 Same song out of UFC 72. Okay.
02:14:26.000 Maybe that was his song.
02:14:27.000 For those about to rock?
02:14:29.000 Great song either way.
02:14:31.000 When everybody hit me, apparently when Stipe knocked out DC, there was an angle where I was like, you saw me.
02:14:40.000 And then recently I saw, did you ever see the meme with Khabib where he's staring at Conor after knocking out fucking, I think it's Jose?
02:14:50.000 And it's me.
02:14:51.000 I'm talking to fucking Khabib, but he's just staring like this.
02:14:56.000 Like, there's a meme that just, like, focuses in on him, like, it's fucking crazy.
02:15:00.000 So, like, it got me thinking, like, I wonder how, like I said, I've been to so many of these fucking fights that I don't even, you know, I was, like, trying to remember, and it's like, I can't even remember.
02:15:08.000 Yeah, you've been coming to them for almost as long as I've been working for the UFC. Yeah, basically.
02:15:14.000 Yeah, close to it.
02:15:16.000 Not as, but close.
02:15:17.000 In the neighborhood.
02:15:18.000 You know what I mean?
02:15:18.000 A couple years behind.
02:15:20.000 Yeah.
02:15:21.000 Yeah.
02:15:21.000 You were the first guy I ever smoked pot indoors with in Vegas.
02:15:25.000 I was like, we can just smoke pot here?
02:15:27.000 I was like a little kid.
02:15:28.000 I think what I say, what are they going to do?
02:15:30.000 I go, where are you going to go?
02:15:32.000 And he's like, go!
02:15:33.000 And he just sparked the joint.
02:15:35.000 We're in the middle of the club, and I was like, okay.
02:15:38.000 Yeah, right there, dude.
02:15:43.000 But like somebody had made a meme that said something about Khabib and his concentration and I started focusing in on him like this.
02:15:50.000 It was hilarious.
02:15:51.000 Make that bigger.
02:15:52.000 Does it make it bigger?
02:15:54.000 Is it possible to make it bigger?
02:15:55.000 Let me tell you something.
02:15:57.000 Listen, look at Khabib's face.
02:15:59.000 Is there a harder man that's ever lived?
02:16:02.000 Let me tell you though, he came out like two fights before that fight.
02:16:06.000 And he was the nicest guy to everybody that came up to him.
02:16:09.000 Oh, he's nice.
02:16:10.000 Everybody came up to him, he engaged with him, talked to him.
02:16:13.000 Soon as the Conor fight was about to happen, that was it.
02:16:18.000 For the whole, he just was watching Connor the whole time.
02:16:21.000 And like, we were talking, like in the whole time, like I said, we were engaging.
02:16:25.000 What I'm saying to him right there is like, oh shit, y'all probably fighting next kind of thing.
02:16:30.000 Because he was like, I want to fucking fight that guy.
02:16:33.000 And they got into it backstage at that shit.
02:16:38.000 But it just made me laugh, and it made me start thinking, like, I wonder how much shit I'm, like, in the background of.
02:16:44.000 You know what I mean?
02:16:45.000 Oh, a ton of them.
02:16:47.000 One of the best ones ever is Ari and Duncan kissing.
02:16:50.000 Remember they planned it?
02:16:52.000 They planned it, and so these guys, the camera passed in front of them, and they grabbed each other and started making out just so they could be on camera.
02:16:59.000 Watch this.
02:17:00.000 Look it.
02:17:00.000 Watch this.
02:17:01.000 Right here, the camera pans to them.
02:17:08.000 Oh, shit.
02:17:09.000 Oh, my God.
02:17:12.000 And Dana texted me afterwards.
02:17:14.000 Did your friends fucking make out on paper here?
02:17:21.000 Oh, man.
02:17:26.000 Oh, shit.
02:17:28.000 What's up?
02:17:29.000 What's up, Jimmy?
02:17:31.000 I thought I was with them at that fight.
02:17:32.000 Were you?
02:17:33.000 They might have been on substance, psychedelic.
02:17:35.000 Oh, they probably were.
02:17:36.000 Yeah, they probably were.
02:17:38.000 That was common practice.
02:17:40.000 Common practice in the day.
02:17:41.000 Want to bang one more up?
02:17:43.000 Let's do it.
02:17:44.000 Let's do it.
02:17:45.000 Let's do smoking and drinking.
02:17:48.000 That seems appropriate.
02:17:50.000 Yes.
02:17:51.000 Let me check.
02:17:52.000 All right.
02:17:55.000 DJ Melody, and let's one more, give a little shout out.
02:17:59.000 Him and the Beat Junkies have a school in Glendale, California.
02:18:02.000 It's called Beat Junkies Institute of Sound.
02:18:05.000 They teach kids, youngsters, and grown-ups how to DJ properly, like real DJs.
02:18:10.000 Yeah.
02:18:11.000 Beautiful.
02:18:13.000 Beat Junkies.
02:18:14.000 That's real, by the way.
02:18:15.000 This is real.
02:18:16.000 He's got people just listening.
02:18:18.000 These are actual turntables.
02:18:20.000 This isn't some bullshit.
02:18:22.000 This is like...
02:18:28.000 Approved by your show.
02:18:29.000 It's a real DJ. We're good to go.
02:18:59.000 We're good to go.
02:19:16.000 We're good to go.
02:19:19.000 We're good to go.
02:19:22.000 Since you got a few friends, if you got a couple in, boy, they'll probably let you fuck them too.
02:19:28.000 I'm on my bullshit, smoking and drinking, just wasting my time.
02:19:34.000 No worrying, no thinking, more women, more wine.
02:19:40.000 I'm on my bullshit, smoking and drinking, just wasting my time.
02:19:57.000 I want my bullshit, drinking with some trouble to start to see double and to put me in a silly jail.
02:20:04.000 Sometimes you make problems and always solve them and always walk around with beer.
02:20:10.000 Now I lost a few nights and I lost a couple fights blacked out on whiskey, bitch.
02:20:16.000 I sold a whole lot of ticks, fucked a bunch of hot chicks in a couple that'll make you cringe.
02:20:31.000 I'm on my bullshit Smokin' and drinkin' I
02:21:03.000 want my bullshit.
02:21:04.000 Low temp dabbing.
02:21:05.000 Pistol grip grabbing.
02:21:07.000 I'm a chrome-plated man to steal.
02:21:10.000 Civilly unrated.
02:21:11.000 Kick me, I'm hated.
02:21:13.000 Cause I like to tell it how I feel.
02:21:16.000 Push, gun, shrug.
02:21:17.000 Got a whole lot of love for the people.
02:21:22.000 I got a lot of friends and I kept a few kids This whole time I've been fuckin' around I'm on my bullshit Smokin' and drinkin' You're wasting my time No happy and no thinkin' I'm aware that my wife I'm on my bullshit Smokin' and drinkin' You're wasting my time I
02:21:56.000 want my bullshit.
02:22:03.000 Woo!
02:22:10.000 That's a great fucking song, man.
02:22:11.000 Thank you, sir.
02:22:13.000 Whitey Ford's House of Pain is the latest album.
02:22:18.000 Let me do all the things my manager will slap me later for if I don't.
02:22:22.000 OG Everlast, you can find me on Instagram.
02:22:24.000 That's the only one I really do, but I'm on the Facebook and all that with all the tours and all that.
02:22:28.000 But if you want to see what I talk about or what I do, it's OG Everlast on Instagram.
02:22:34.000 I got Joe started on Instagram, by the way.
02:22:36.000 That's 100% true.
02:22:37.000 And he's kicking my ass all over.
02:22:39.000 He's got like 18 million followers.
02:22:41.000 I got like 98,000.
02:22:43.000 We'll get you more today.
02:22:46.000 I always do.
02:22:48.000 Your people always come and are always beautiful folks.
02:22:52.000 I listen to you.
02:22:53.000 The reason why I'm on Instagram is 100% because of you.
02:22:55.000 But the folks that always come after a podcast are always like...
02:23:02.000 That's awesome to hear.
02:23:04.000 I think we tapped into a river of cool people.
02:23:07.000 I think they're out there.
02:23:13.000 A lot of the shittiest behavior that we all exhibit is because we're around shitty behavior.
02:23:16.000 If we make an agreement to be nice to each other, we can change everything.
02:23:20.000 I'm working on it.
02:23:21.000 We are.
02:23:22.000 I'm a dick.
02:23:22.000 All of us are.
02:23:23.000 You're not a dick, man.
02:23:24.000 You're a man, and you're Irish.
02:23:27.000 I'm a dick.
02:23:28.000 You're a guy, man.
02:23:30.000 I'm looking for a quick excuse to be one if you want to be an ass.
02:23:33.000 Yeah, baby, but in all the years that I've known you, you're a very introspective guy, man.
02:23:40.000 You look at yourself, you know?
02:23:42.000 When people make mistakes, they look at themselves.
02:23:44.000 You're a guy who looks at everything, man.
02:23:46.000 You look at yourself.
02:23:47.000 You look at other people.
02:23:48.000 You're an honest dude.
02:23:49.000 It's nice to be afforded the time and luxuries to do such things, too.
02:23:52.000 Let's acknowledge that some people, hey, man, motherfuckers, some people can barely look up from the grind, man.
02:23:57.000 It's a blessing to be able to have those moments of, hey, whatever it is, Joe Rogan in the fucking brush stalking an elk.
02:24:07.000 That's where he gets his moment.
02:24:08.000 Yeah.
02:24:08.000 Or me driving Pacific Coast Highway, listening to a beat, trying to come with an idea.
02:24:15.000 That's a luxury.
02:24:16.000 Even though it's our work, you might be thinking of a joke out there while you're fucking...
02:24:21.000 We're super lucky, for sure.
02:24:24.000 That's so important to acknowledge for everybody.
02:24:26.000 We didn't used to be, and that's the grind.
02:24:29.000 We're all okay.
02:24:31.000 We just gotta figure our way through our own individual maze.
02:24:34.000 The problem is in comparison, right?
02:24:36.000 That's a big part of the problem.
02:24:38.000 I'm totally paraphrasing, but there's definitely a famous phrase where it's like, comparison is the death of joy.
02:24:44.000 And I think we've even talked about it.
02:24:45.000 I'm having deja vu, so it might have been on here that we talked about that.
02:24:49.000 I'm a repetitive fuck.
02:24:50.000 And I say a lot of the same shit over and over again.
02:24:52.000 That's a Thomas Jefferson quote, correct?
02:24:55.000 Comparison is the thief of joy.
02:24:56.000 Thief of joy.
02:24:57.000 I think we have talked about it.
02:24:58.000 It's one of my favorites.
02:24:59.000 My deja vu is in high gear right now.
02:25:01.000 It's one of my favorite quotes, because it just makes you realize, like, this is something you can't even control.
02:25:05.000 Like, you're concentrating on shit you can't control.
02:25:07.000 Also, I feel like it's like, there's this...
02:25:09.000 Everybody's not entitled to the luxury that we're talking about.
02:25:13.000 So it's like, you gotta be thankful for it on an extra high level, because...
02:25:18.000 We're good to go.
02:25:44.000 That's how I equate it.
02:25:45.000 Like, it's a trade.
02:25:46.000 You know what I mean?
02:25:47.000 And it's an imbalanced society that has...
02:25:51.000 I mean, I've met teachers that I feel like should be making way more fucking money than me, man.
02:25:56.000 Like, on real levels that I've seen do things for kids on...
02:26:00.000 Like, you know, my school has a mixture.
02:26:02.000 Like, you know, kids that go there because they live there.
02:26:05.000 And then there's a lot of people trying to go to the school because it's a very nice school.
02:26:09.000 But, you know...
02:26:10.000 So, there's imbalances and I've seen teachers like come out their own pockets and do things for, you know, people that were like, wow, man, that's, you know what I mean?
02:26:19.000 I like to think I do nice things and I think I do, but I'm saying it's like when I see it on a level where it's like grassroots, ground level, it's impactful to me, you know?
02:26:29.000 Yeah, it's...
02:26:30.000 You know, when you think about teachers, that's the one.
02:26:32.000 That's the heartstring puller.
02:26:34.000 You know, like, how much do teachers make?
02:26:35.000 You hear about...
02:26:36.000 They should be rock stars.
02:26:37.000 How do you...
02:26:37.000 You're taking care of our babies.
02:26:41.000 You're teaching our babies.
02:26:43.000 And you hear about the bad ones.
02:26:45.000 You hear about the mean teachers that fuck with a kid's head.
02:26:48.000 They don't realize it.
02:26:49.000 They don't realize what they're doing to the kid.
02:26:51.000 Like, ugh.
02:26:52.000 Some people are just angry.
02:26:54.000 They're just angry and mean.
02:26:56.000 It comes out when they're teaching.
02:26:58.000 And if your teacher gets stuck, or your kid, rather, if your kid gets stuck with one of those teachers, that can have a devastating impact on the kid's life.
02:27:06.000 It sucks.
02:27:07.000 We're experiencing something like that, but not on a very minor level of the way the school...
02:27:14.000 We just found out yesterday what teachers our kids have.
02:27:19.000 You know what I mean?
02:27:19.000 It's like...
02:27:20.000 There's the whole cultural parent circle of knowing which teachers you want and which ones you don't.
02:27:27.000 You know what I mean?
02:27:27.000 So it's like, I'm not going to go into whether we got what we wanted or not, but it's like the fucking drama behind it.
02:27:33.000 It's hilarity to me.
02:27:34.000 It's such a like, whoa, is there abuse going on or what?
02:27:40.000 One teacher's a little more strict than the other.
02:27:43.000 In my day, my parents would have said, like, that's the teacher we want.
02:27:46.000 Nowadays, it's almost like the opposite.
02:27:48.000 Yeah.
02:27:49.000 In the old days, my mom would have been like, that's the stricter teacher?
02:27:51.000 Yeah, put him in that class.
02:27:52.000 Put him in that class.
02:27:53.000 Because that's the one that's not going to take any shit, and that's the one that's going to make sure he knows people aren't going to take shit from him in life.
02:27:59.000 You know what I mean?
02:28:00.000 I understand that mentality.
02:28:03.000 Nowadays, it's almost the flip.
02:28:05.000 Like, oh, that teacher's like, she's just so abrasive.
02:28:10.000 Too demanding.
02:28:11.000 It's like, well, what does she do?
02:28:12.000 Well, she raised her voice to a kid that was, what was the kid doing?
02:28:15.000 He was fucking losing his mind in class.
02:28:17.000 So the fucking teacher raised their voice or something, you know?
02:28:20.000 I'm just giving a general example here, but it's hilarious.
02:28:22.000 When I was in Florida, we got paddled.
02:28:24.000 We got paddled at school.
02:28:26.000 I got in a fight with a kid named Preston Banks.
02:28:28.000 We duked it out.
02:28:30.000 You got paddled.
02:28:31.000 I was like, fuck.
02:28:33.000 I lived there from 11 to 13, so somewhere in that range.
02:28:37.000 They fucking whacked me in the ass with a paddle.
02:28:38.000 Where was this?
02:28:39.000 Florida.
02:28:40.000 Florida.
02:28:40.000 Yeah.
02:28:41.000 Yeah, Florida, they used to be allowed to paddle you.
02:28:43.000 This dude had a paddle, like an actual wooden paddle.
02:28:46.000 And me and this kid got...
02:28:48.000 This is what I remember thinking.
02:28:50.000 Even though I was probably, like, 11 or 12 or whatever I was, when I got in a fight with this kid, I realized this kid had been, like, badly burned when he was young.
02:28:58.000 And we were, you know, we were in school together, and he was, like, missing part of his ear.
02:29:02.000 And his neck was all fucked up, and I was thinking, like, wow, this guy, like, he's not doing so well.
02:29:09.000 Like, this is...
02:29:09.000 It made me realize, like, we got into this little scrap over nothing because it just...
02:29:15.000 He wasn't doing so well.
02:29:16.000 And I didn't realize that until I was in the principal's office with him in the fight.
02:29:20.000 Like, we couldn't fight in front of the principal.
02:29:22.000 That was the authority figure.
02:29:23.000 We were both, like, subdued.
02:29:25.000 But I was realizing when I was around this guy, I'm like, this isn't a mean guy.
02:29:28.000 He's a sad guy.
02:29:29.000 Like, he's a guy that just didn't get any love, and he feels like he got ripped off by life because he got burned when he was a little kid.
02:29:35.000 For sure.
02:29:36.000 And it made me think.
02:29:37.000 Like, it changed the way I looked at people.
02:29:40.000 Like, that one little argument and fight with one kid and then getting paddled.
02:29:45.000 Getting paddle just cemented it.
02:29:47.000 Like, ow!
02:29:48.000 Put the stamp on it.
02:29:50.000 I don't agree with it.
02:29:51.000 You know, and the guy didn't hurt me.
02:29:52.000 He didn't try to hurt me.
02:29:54.000 He didn't try to hurt the other dude either.
02:29:55.000 But he definitely paddled us.
02:29:58.000 It used to be a legal thing.
02:30:00.000 Put a sting on it, man.
02:30:01.000 You know what I mean?
02:30:01.000 That's what we grew up with.
02:30:02.000 I got spanked.
02:30:04.000 But is that good...
02:30:06.000 I think there's appropriate time and place.
02:30:10.000 I really do.
02:30:10.000 For girls?
02:30:11.000 I don't know about that.
02:30:13.000 That's different because I have two girls and I've never spanked my kids.
02:30:17.000 I don't think I'd spank my son.
02:30:18.000 I've threatened to.
02:30:19.000 I don't think I'd spank my son.
02:30:20.000 I've threatened to, but I've never had to actually commit and do it.
02:30:25.000 So I don't know.
02:30:26.000 Yeah, no.
02:30:26.000 It seems like it might not be the right.
02:30:29.000 And even with a boy, I'm talking about that.
02:30:31.000 Physical justice...
02:30:34.000 For me, it would be a rare thing.
02:30:37.000 Let me give you an example of a time in my life when I definitely deserved physical justice and got it.
02:30:43.000 My father, you know, I was using guns when I was very young.
02:30:47.000 We'd go out and shoot and, like, not hunt necessarily, but he'd take us out and shoot in the mountains, out in the Mangelis Forest back in the day.
02:30:54.000 And, like, fucking, I had very good...
02:30:56.000 Gun education and understanding of guns.
02:30:59.000 And one time when they were away, I fucked around with his pump shotgun and accidentally loaded it and banged and shot into the wall.
02:31:09.000 This was an apartment too.
02:31:11.000 This wasn't a house.
02:31:12.000 This was in an apartment building.
02:31:13.000 Now, it wasn't a wall connecting to another apartment, but the possibilities, you know what I mean?
02:31:18.000 When they came home a few hours later, that apartment outside was surrounded by police, like, with guns.
02:31:25.000 Like, they didn't know what happened.
02:31:26.000 The neighbors all called cops.
02:31:28.000 They heard a shotgun.
02:31:29.000 So, after they all settled it down, I got my ass fucking kicked that night by my father.
02:31:36.000 You know what I mean?
02:31:37.000 And, you know, some people nowadays would say, that's fucking...
02:31:42.000 Rough.
02:31:43.000 But no, I fucking could have fucking killed a human being easily.
02:31:47.000 You need to sometimes know like, okay, this is because what you just did could have wound you up in fucking the penitentiary for the rest of your life.
02:31:56.000 So an ass-kicking doesn't seem as extreme as you think when you put it in the balance of that.
02:32:03.000 So when you're getting to like a level of that, I think...
02:32:07.000 Especially for a boy.
02:32:09.000 If a girl was going that wild, I would encourage the mom to throw the beating.
02:32:14.000 A dad can't throw that beating.
02:32:16.000 It'd be a little rough.
02:32:17.000 But I think there's a time and a place where, hey, if you're going to stop, you've got to let them know.
02:32:23.000 This will be the rest of your life if you keep down this path.
02:32:27.000 It's got to be that extreme to me for it to be a beating nowadays.
02:32:30.000 When I was young, a beating could come from talking back.
02:32:33.000 Right.
02:32:34.000 At least a smack in the face.
02:32:35.000 Yeah, well that's, you know, a shoe.
02:32:38.000 If it was mom, after like 13, mom stopped using the hands because, you know, I had outgrown her.
02:32:46.000 My mom was little.
02:32:48.000 My mom was a little woman, like 4 foot 11, 5 foot tops.
02:32:52.000 Oh yeah so after a while it was like it went from the hands to like stirring spoons and shit and then once those started breaking it became shoes and like you know whatever else broomstick.
02:33:05.000 And then it became like wait till your fucking father gets home.
02:33:09.000 My mom might have like gently smacked me upside the head gently like never like a real like wound.
02:33:15.000 No my mom was a Brooklyn lady.
02:33:17.000 She might have been like what are you doing stupid?
02:33:23.000 My mom's wasn't playing.
02:33:24.000 I never got clipped.
02:33:24.000 I never got dropped.
02:33:25.000 No, mom's tried to fucking...
02:33:26.000 You never dropped me, ma.
02:33:27.000 I remember being like 9 or 10 and mom's chasing me down the block.
02:33:31.000 No!
02:33:31.000 Catching me.
02:33:32.000 No!
02:33:33.000 And fucking tackling me, dude.
02:33:36.000 Like dead ass.
02:33:38.000 You get beat up in front of you.
02:33:39.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:33:42.000 It's the worst.
02:33:43.000 It has to be the worst.
02:33:44.000 It happened.
02:33:44.000 My mom was not chasing me.
02:33:46.000 She'd be like, you're coming home eventually, dummy.
02:33:49.000 My mom wasn't, I mean, she wasn't having that.
02:33:52.000 Oh, word?
02:33:52.000 Oh, yeah.
02:33:54.000 My mom would have never chased me.
02:33:55.000 She would be like, I'm not playing your games.
02:33:59.000 She was little, but she was fast.
02:34:01.000 She was fast.
02:34:02.000 That's crazy that she caught you, beat your ass in front of your friends.
02:34:05.000 It's so rough.
02:34:06.000 When you're a young boy and you're trying to be cool, it's like the most embarrassing.
02:34:10.000 Like any day, you could just trip on your own dick and fall face into a fence like a fucking asshole.
02:34:15.000 You're so goofy.
02:34:17.000 I think it actually made some of my friends at the time understand me a little bit differently, dude.
02:34:22.000 Like, oh, wow, dude.
02:34:23.000 All right.
02:34:24.000 Yeah, for sure.
02:34:25.000 We get you now.
02:34:26.000 We understand kind of your whole thing.
02:34:28.000 Like, you're Steve.
02:34:29.000 Like, you guys are nuts.
02:34:31.000 Yeah, for sure.
02:34:33.000 When you think of yourself as a musician and an artist, you're so fortunate.
02:34:39.000 This is going to sound weird, but you're so fortunate to come from a chaotic upbringing.
02:34:43.000 I feel like everyone who I know that comes from some sort of a chaotic upbringing has a different kind of horsepower to their shit.
02:34:52.000 All my favorite people that I like to listen to and watch, they all had some real fucked up moments and struggles and chaos and madness.
02:35:03.000 You don't get what you put out without that.
02:35:07.000 That's like the root of it all.
02:35:08.000 That's the seed that causes it all to grow.
02:35:11.000 I mean, it's similar to a joke.
02:35:14.000 A song, you're trying to find...
02:35:17.000 It depends on what angle you take from it.
02:35:21.000 I like to call it the highest common denominator that I'm trying to find.
02:35:25.000 It's like the highest level thing we can all connect on.
02:35:28.000 You know what I mean?
02:35:28.000 Not the basest, most lowest level or common denominator.
02:35:33.000 I'm trying to find what kind of elevated level can I speak to you on?
02:35:36.000 Even if it's about fuckery, can I raise the level of speaking about it and telling a tale about it without it being, again, the most base and easiest, lowest hanging fruit?
02:35:55.000 That's the same thing, I think, with a joke.
02:35:57.000 You're trying to find there's no real new Like, you're just finding new angles on funny shit.
02:36:06.000 You know what I mean?
02:36:06.000 One time that things are new is when things are newly invented or when they're new events.
02:36:11.000 Like, it has to be like a significant event or a new invention.
02:36:15.000 Then things open up new pathways.
02:36:18.000 Other than that, like, if you're talking about relationships, you're doing a variation of a take on it that everybody's had who's had a long life and been in relationships.
02:36:28.000 Especially Larry King, holla at your boy!
02:36:31.000 Going on number eight.
02:36:33.000 Was that number seven that he just left?
02:36:36.000 Eighth.
02:36:37.000 Eighth divorce, seventh wife.
02:36:38.000 I think he remarried one of them.
02:36:39.000 Damn.
02:36:41.000 Like that.
02:36:42.000 You know?
02:36:42.000 Larry King's still alive?
02:36:44.000 You didn't know?
02:36:45.000 Oh, Roy Wood.
02:36:47.000 Roy Wood.
02:36:48.000 Roy and I were looking at pictures of Larry King.
02:36:51.000 I really didn't impress that he's still alive.
02:36:54.000 He's getting divorced at 85. Fucking more power to him.
02:36:57.000 Get busy.
02:36:58.000 If you got the money to get divorced at 85, go for it.
02:37:00.000 They're shooting him up with steroids and cocaine and they're just gonna start...
02:37:03.000 In Viagra?
02:37:04.000 Just having gals come over to the place.
02:37:06.000 He's over at Arts Deli just holding court.
02:37:09.000 Can you imagine if over the last year of his life he just banks an unprecedented volume of internet porn and just releases it all in one blast.
02:37:20.000 Larry King fucks.
02:37:22.000 He just called it...
02:37:23.000 .com.
02:37:25.000 King Sex Tapes?
02:37:25.000 Yes.
02:37:25.000 King Sex Tapes.
02:37:27.000 Yeah.
02:37:28.000 King, yeah, just banging it out.
02:37:31.000 And just, yeah.
02:37:35.000 That's how he's going to do it.
02:37:36.000 Get a lot of Patreon.
02:37:38.000 You get so much money.
02:37:40.000 If you really just want money, now's the time to act.
02:37:44.000 That's wild.
02:37:46.000 Poor Larry.
02:37:48.000 He doesn't seem like he has good posture.
02:37:53.000 Like, that's not good.
02:37:54.000 When you're an older fella and you like that good culture...
02:37:56.000 Does he have the curve?
02:37:57.000 Yeah, he's got that curve.
02:37:58.000 The curve.
02:37:59.000 He was a very nice guy.
02:38:01.000 I was on his show twice.
02:38:02.000 I was on his show twice for Fear Factor.
02:38:04.000 He's always very nice.
02:38:05.000 Very friendly guy, you know?
02:38:08.000 You kind of got to be when you do that for a living and every night you're talking to a person...
02:38:12.000 You got to be good at that shit.
02:38:14.000 You can't be like me.
02:38:15.000 I'd be like, fuck...
02:38:17.000 Didn't he go to jail?
02:38:18.000 Isn't there a Larry King?
02:38:19.000 We need to get a Larry King mugshot.
02:38:21.000 Yeah.
02:38:22.000 Get that Larry King mugshot.
02:38:23.000 Order that shit up.
02:38:24.000 Go to...
02:38:25.000 Take the...
02:38:25.000 Find the photo of Larry King mugshot.
02:38:28.000 How do we not have Larry King?
02:38:29.000 We just decided to get Pablo Escobar.
02:38:31.000 Hey, dude, you need to get the mugshot of the dude who's still on CNN who got found out in Central Park in New York with meth and a makeshift noose around his dick.
02:38:43.000 His name was...
02:38:44.000 Oh, what the fuck?
02:38:45.000 What's his name?
02:38:46.000 How do we not have that?
02:38:46.000 The English dude with the glasses.
02:38:48.000 The English dude with the glasses.
02:38:50.000 CNN. CNN? Richard...
02:38:52.000 Richard.
02:38:55.000 Come on, dude.
02:38:56.000 You're helping.
02:38:57.000 Come on.
02:38:57.000 Come on, dude.
02:38:58.000 He's ordering up a large print of...
02:39:01.000 Richard.
02:39:02.000 Richard.
02:39:05.000 Oh, man.
02:39:06.000 You know his face.
02:39:06.000 As soon as you see his face, you're going to be like, oh, that guy!
02:39:08.000 Richard Quest.
02:39:09.000 Richard Quest.
02:39:10.000 Who's Richard Quest?
02:39:11.000 He's the guy I'm talking about.
02:39:13.000 I don't know who he is.
02:39:14.000 Oh, dude, if you see his face, you'll be like, oh yeah, he's like the English guy on CNN. He got caught in Central Park with meth and some sort of noose or something around his dick, as far as I remember reading.
02:39:28.000 We were clowning it for a while.
02:39:31.000 If you're a single gay guy, isn't that what you're supposed to do?
02:39:33.000 I don't know.
02:39:34.000 You're supposed to have meth around your dick.
02:39:36.000 That's like part of the thing.
02:39:38.000 Is this not on the internet?
02:39:40.000 Am I making this up?
02:39:41.000 No, there's no.
02:39:41.000 I was looking for a mugshot.
02:39:43.000 There's no mugshot, but here's an explanation from Huffington Post.
02:39:46.000 Oh, there's an explanation?
02:39:46.000 Okay, there's an explanation.
02:39:49.000 I'm not making this up, right?
02:39:51.000 This wasn't like a drug-induced hallucination or something, right?
02:39:55.000 Oh my god, how hilarious is the way they put this?
02:39:57.000 CNN personality Richard Quest was busted in Central Park early yesterday with some drugs in his pocket and a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, no big deal, and a sex toy in his boot.
02:40:07.000 Law enforcement officials and sources said, Quest was initially busted for loitering.
02:40:14.000 It really wasn't about that.
02:40:16.000 Aside from the oddly configured rope, the search also turned up a sex toy inside of his boot.
02:40:24.000 That means his asshole.
02:40:25.000 And a small bag of methamphetamine in his left jacket pocket.
02:40:30.000 It wasn't immediately clear what the rope was for.
02:40:37.000 That's the mug shot you needed.
02:40:39.000 But show him a picture so he'll know who I'm talking about.
02:40:42.000 Richard Quest.
02:40:43.000 I'm going to talk about that on stage from now on.
02:40:45.000 Send me that.
02:40:46.000 That guy, dude!
02:40:47.000 You don't know that guy?
02:40:48.000 He's all over the fucking CNN. I do not know that guy.
02:40:52.000 Can you send me that article that we just sent into my Evernote?
02:40:56.000 Oh, I hope it provides you something beautiful.
02:40:58.000 There's something there.
02:40:59.000 There's something there.
02:41:00.000 I hope it provides you something beautiful.
02:41:02.000 This is the best part about the article.
02:41:03.000 It was not clear.
02:41:04.000 It was not immediately clear what the rope was for.
02:41:07.000 And I'm like, let me help.
02:41:08.000 Let me help you out.
02:41:11.000 Was it tight around his neck and his dick?
02:41:13.000 Well, I'm no fucking Columbo, but I see a connection!
02:41:20.000 The police noticed Mr. Quest at 64th Street and West Drive at 3.40am, the official said.
02:41:31.000 As he was being escorted out, he volunteered, in quotes, I have meth in my pocket.
02:41:37.000 According to an official briefed on the case, the police searched him and recovered a small amount of methamphetamine in a Ziploc bag and a rope around his dick and his neck.
02:41:49.000 And his neck between his boot.
02:41:52.000 More importantly, there's a lot of dudes who do meth.
02:41:54.000 And you know what they do?
02:41:56.000 They keep it together!
02:41:57.000 And they stay on the farm!
02:41:59.000 I wonder what kind of boots he had on.
02:42:01.000 There's a snake in my boot!
02:42:03.000 No, in his boot.
02:42:05.000 That means in his asshole.
02:42:06.000 Is this an English paper?
02:42:08.000 No, this is New York.
02:42:09.000 It was Central Park.
02:42:10.000 I think they mean in his asshole.
02:42:11.000 I think they mean in his asshole.
02:42:15.000 In his ass?
02:42:15.000 Wow.
02:42:16.000 That's a whole new dimension.
02:42:17.000 That's your trunk, bro.
02:42:18.000 They wouldn't call it his boot.
02:42:20.000 No, in England, but it's like, isn't this the New York Times?
02:42:23.000 Yes, they're using proper British English.
02:42:26.000 That's America.
02:42:27.000 It's the New York Times!
02:42:28.000 We call boots a boot in America.
02:42:29.000 Let's go with the better angle on it that day was in his ass.
02:42:32.000 Yeah, I mean, that's funny.
02:42:33.000 That's the better.
02:42:33.000 New York Post, not the New York Times.
02:42:35.000 It was in his asshole.
02:42:36.000 There you go.
02:42:36.000 That's why they said his boot.
02:42:37.000 His boot.
02:42:37.000 His boot is proper British.
02:42:40.000 That is factual.
02:42:43.000 That is factual.
02:42:44.000 Clarkson and fucking Richard Hammonds and James May, they refer to the trunk as the boot.
02:42:48.000 Yeah, it's the boot.
02:42:49.000 Yes.
02:42:50.000 It's in his asshole.
02:42:52.000 Wow.
02:42:53.000 The guy had a sex toy in his asshole.
02:42:54.000 Hey, no judgment.
02:42:55.000 Brought a whole new fucking dimension to that.
02:43:00.000 No judgment.
02:43:01.000 Wow.
02:43:03.000 It's okay.
02:43:06.000 It's fine.
02:43:08.000 Yes, sir.
02:43:09.000 Even if he didn't get caught...
02:43:11.000 With that and his asshole.
02:43:13.000 He's still doing meth and talking to cops.
02:43:16.000 With a rope around his dick and neck.
02:43:18.000 Yeah, that part too.
02:43:19.000 I was going to get to that.
02:43:22.000 As if it was so crazy if he had a fucking rubber dick in his ass.
02:43:27.000 Like, wait, what?
02:43:28.000 I'm finding that shit.
02:43:29.000 I'll get you that mugshot.
02:43:32.000 I'm finding it.
02:43:33.000 Who doesn't like a little meth every now and then?
02:43:35.000 Rope around his dick and balls, whatever, whatever.
02:43:40.000 He got dismissed.
02:43:41.000 All charges were dismissed.
02:43:42.000 Thank God for America.
02:43:43.000 White privilege.
02:43:54.000 Oh, shit!
02:43:56.000 Imagine if you're a dude as black as Wesley Snipes with dreadlocks.
02:44:00.000 They catch you with a rope around your dick and neck with a back of your pocket, bro.
02:44:05.000 You're gonna die in jail.
02:44:06.000 Okay, yeah.
02:44:08.000 You're gonna die in that jail.
02:44:10.000 Yeah, I think so.
02:44:12.000 100%.
02:44:12.000 I think so.
02:44:13.000 100. 100. Dismissed?
02:44:16.000 You had meth!
02:44:18.000 Meth!
02:44:19.000 And a rope!
02:44:21.000 Connecting your neck and cock.
02:44:24.000 And probably a sex toy in your ass.
02:44:26.000 The UK version says it's in his shoe.
02:44:29.000 At the very least, I was going to say, in his shoe, which is weird enough.
02:44:34.000 It might even be weirder.
02:44:35.000 But let's not jump to conclusions.
02:44:37.000 That might just be a confusing interpretation of the American version of boot.
02:44:42.000 Maybe they think shoe means ass.
02:44:45.000 It was with another man.
02:44:46.000 Oh.
02:44:49.000 Nobody's got a fucking rubber dick in their boot.
02:44:52.000 That's outrageous.
02:44:52.000 That would make your boot all fucking uncomfortable.
02:44:54.000 Why wouldn't you just put it in your pocket?
02:44:56.000 It's in his ass, bro.
02:44:57.000 Let's just run with that.
02:44:58.000 Because he had meth in his pocket.
02:45:00.000 That's why.
02:45:01.000 No more Google search.
02:45:03.000 Shut off all the computers.
02:45:05.000 Spread misinformation.
02:45:06.000 Yeah.
02:45:07.000 I'm sure it was just an issue.
02:45:09.000 Whatever, whatever.
02:45:10.000 And you don't ever volunteer that you have drugs.
02:45:13.000 Let them find the drugs.
02:45:14.000 Yeah, let them find the drugs.
02:45:15.000 Unless you want to fuck the cops.
02:45:17.000 I have a quick good one on that level.
02:45:19.000 On that level, first time I went to Japan, With House of Pain.
02:45:24.000 What happened?
02:45:24.000 We were on, you know, it was one of them things where we were touring from tour to tour to tour.
02:45:27.000 I would go home and literally take one set of clothes out of a bag, throw it in another bag, and leave.
02:45:32.000 So we got to Japan.
02:45:34.000 And on this particular trip, I brought my girlfriend at the time, and I think Danny did, and Lethal brought his own homie or whatever, but we brought a bunch of guests.
02:45:43.000 And everybody gets through customs.
02:45:45.000 And as I'm getting through customs, the guy reaches into this one jacket I have, and he pulls his hand out, and there's this little nugget of Bud.
02:45:52.000 Oh!
02:45:52.000 And he's like, what is that?
02:45:55.000 And I was like, well, can you speak English?
02:45:58.000 Because he said it in Japanese.
02:46:00.000 So I said, okay, what is that?
02:46:01.000 I was like, my brain just was like, well, fuck, man.
02:46:05.000 It looks like weed.
02:46:06.000 I said, it looks like weed.
02:46:07.000 You know, I just fucking owned it.
02:46:09.000 They went and got this little tester, put some shit in, so if it turns blue, it's weed.
02:46:13.000 I was like, it's weed.
02:46:15.000 Let's just fucking save a little trouble.
02:46:17.000 It's weed.
02:46:17.000 Meanwhile, everybody else had gotten through.
02:46:19.000 They brought everybody else back in.
02:46:21.000 Right?
02:46:22.000 Fucking gave them the fucking finger.
02:46:25.000 Like, my lady, everything at the time.
02:46:28.000 Everybody got the strip search.
02:46:29.000 They never strip searched me.
02:46:30.000 They searched everything I had.
02:46:32.000 All my bags, everything, right?
02:46:33.000 They tested one nugget of weed, whatever.
02:46:36.000 I end up, after several hours, the record label paid off whatever they had to pay off.
02:46:41.000 We got into the country and were able to do our tour.
02:46:44.000 Now the point of the story is everybody's fucking hating my guts.
02:46:47.000 The whole fucking bunch of them.
02:46:48.000 We get to the hotel.
02:46:49.000 I'm unpacking my bag, trying to figure out how the whole fucking thing happened.
02:46:53.000 I'm looking at the jacket.
02:46:54.000 And I reach into the pocket.
02:46:56.000 There's nothing in there.
02:46:57.000 I was like, fuck, that's crazy.
02:46:58.000 I reach into the other pocket of the jacket.
02:47:01.000 I pull out a fucking ounce of fucking weed.
02:47:05.000 They never looked in the other pocket of the jacket.
02:47:08.000 A whole ounce?
02:47:08.000 A fucking ounce of weed, I shit you not.
02:47:10.000 So you know what you were without even knowing you were doing it?
02:47:13.000 You were like sending a small mule to get busted so that the big ones can sneak around the side.
02:47:19.000 I must have been rolling a joint at the last tour and had a nug left over and just throwing it in the pocket and not thinking about it on one side.
02:47:26.000 The cartel does that.
02:47:27.000 But if they would have found that other one first, I'd be in jail in motherfucking Japan for a long time.
02:47:32.000 Ever and ever.
02:47:33.000 But I got in, I called the whole, I called everybody that smoked in the crew down to the room after that, and I was like, yo, check it out, man.
02:47:39.000 I really didn't mean this to happen, but I probably had more good-ass fucking weed in Japan than anybody at the time.
02:47:48.000 You know what's incredible?
02:47:49.000 Because all they had was hash and shit like that.
02:47:51.000 Stop and think of that moment.
02:47:52.000 That moment, if they didn't go in that one pocket and they went in the other pocket first, and they found that giant bag of weed, we wouldn't be having this conversation.
02:48:00.000 Nope.
02:48:01.000 We probably wouldn't.
02:48:02.000 Nope.
02:48:03.000 I don't think so.
02:48:04.000 That's a lot of weed.
02:48:05.000 Who knows, though?
02:48:06.000 In Japan, it would have been...
02:48:07.000 It took a lot of money to get me out of that, regardless.
02:48:09.000 Yeah.
02:48:10.000 A lot.
02:48:11.000 Instead of...
02:48:12.000 I think it cost them like a thousand bucks, which was like 10,000 or something yen, or 100,000 yen.
02:48:19.000 Is this pre or post, put your lights on?
02:48:20.000 No, this was House Payne.
02:48:22.000 This was like when the only story like it was like Paul McCartney is banned for life because he got caught with some weed.
02:48:31.000 For life?
02:48:32.000 I don't know if it still exists, but there was a point where he was banned for life because he got caught with weed over there.
02:48:38.000 Wow.
02:48:38.000 Well, it used to be in Nevada, you get sent to jail for life if you had weed.
02:48:42.000 And now it's legal there.
02:48:44.000 There's a bunch of dudes looking out those barred windows.
02:48:47.000 Yeah, that's just gotta, something's gotta be done about that.
02:48:50.000 That ain't working.
02:48:51.000 Yeah, that's the problem.
02:48:52.000 That's the number one problem.
02:48:54.000 It's the number one problem with laws against things like weed.
02:48:57.000 As long as you can buy some whiskey...
02:48:59.000 It's part of the number one problem.
02:49:00.000 A lot of it, too, is a lot of these prisons are privatized and they don't want to let a lot of these guys go, man.
02:49:04.000 A lot of these guys get money for the amount of fucking people in their prisons.
02:49:08.000 I got a solution.
02:49:09.000 Those private prison dudes should start selling weed.
02:49:15.000 Right?
02:49:16.000 Why not?
02:49:16.000 That's a cleaner way to live your life, man.
02:49:18.000 Don't be a goddamn slave owner.
02:49:19.000 You guys are slave owners.
02:49:20.000 There's this whole urban legend that is very believable about this letter that went around like a bunch of people in the hip-hop music industry.
02:49:29.000 I don't know.
02:49:30.000 Maybe it was within the last decade.
02:49:33.000 Where they described, like, this guy claimed to be a member of the elite class of, like, executives of the music business in the mid-90s and whatnot.
02:49:44.000 And there was a time when the private prison industry kind of came and got involved and got a lot of these people to invest and then kind of helped direct, like, things like rap music.
02:49:54.000 And if you remember, there used to be, like, public—I don't know how big a fan of music you were at the time— I think?
02:50:16.000 And that disappeared.
02:50:18.000 And this letter that went around was kind of claiming this guy was part of this thing and he left the meeting when these guys...
02:50:25.000 It was like a whole conspiracy thing.
02:50:27.000 But it's totally believable that these guys would direct a music and a fucking media in a certain direction to encourage fucking basically a cycle of fucking prison.
02:50:38.000 Because if you look at rap music, if you look at rap music and what happened from the 90s till now, there is no conscious music anymore.
02:50:46.000 There's none.
02:50:49.000 Some people will tell you it's fucking God's honest truth.
02:50:52.000 Some will tell you it's the wildest speculation in the world.
02:50:54.000 But you can dig it up easily.
02:50:56.000 Kanye has some conscious music.
02:50:58.000 For sure.
02:50:58.000 But like what?
02:50:59.000 Like Jesus Walks?
02:51:00.000 That was written by a guy named Rhymefest, I think is his name.
02:51:04.000 I think.
02:51:04.000 The guy from Chicago.
02:51:05.000 One of his partners from Chicago wrote that song.
02:51:07.000 You know what I mean?
02:51:08.000 What you gotta remember, these guys are like, Kanye's a producer.
02:51:10.000 And I'm not saying he doesn't write, but what I'm saying is a lot of, you know, he's also like, he will take a song and make the song.
02:51:16.000 Because he's a producer.
02:51:17.000 Yeah.
02:51:18.000 Conscious.
02:51:18.000 A lot of people do.
02:51:19.000 I'm not just saying Kanye is a fraud or anything.
02:51:21.000 I'm just saying, as a producer, Drake doesn't write all his records.
02:51:27.000 There's a different era of rap and shit like that going on from when I was young.
02:51:31.000 When I was young, it was pretty much 90% if you couldn't call yourself an emcee or a rapper if you didn't write your own shit.
02:51:37.000 There were cats that didn't do it.
02:51:38.000 It's always been there.
02:51:39.000 There's always been the ghost writing scene.
02:51:41.000 But if you wanted to walk in a room and hold down any kind of respect with people, they had to know you wrote your rhymes.
02:51:47.000 You know what I mean?
02:51:47.000 That's the same in comedy.
02:51:48.000 Yeah.
02:51:48.000 So it's like, you know, and it's not saying like, you're not a fraud.
02:51:52.000 You're just a different kind of entertainer.
02:51:53.000 You know what I mean?
02:51:54.000 As far as I'm concerned, I don't shit on it.
02:51:55.000 You know what I mean?
02:51:56.000 There's a lot of Drake records I like.
02:51:58.000 There's a lot of other shit I like.
02:51:59.000 You know what I mean?
02:52:00.000 I know those guys didn't write those records because I can look at the writer's credit and see 20 writer's credits on it.
02:52:05.000 But I come from the era of like, you know, you got to write your shit.
02:52:08.000 Yeah.
02:52:09.000 I think some people feel the value of collaboration, which is a legitimate thing.
02:52:13.000 And if your ego is good enough where you can work with, like Paul Mooney worked with Pryor.
02:52:19.000 Pryor is the greatest of all time.
02:52:21.000 In my opinion.
02:52:22.000 And he worked with Mooney.
02:52:24.000 Mooney helped him a lot.
02:52:25.000 And Richard Jenny worked with Chris Rock and others as well.
02:52:30.000 It's not like some of the greatest of all time.
02:52:32.000 I've had people that work with him.
02:52:34.000 But Paul Mooney is God.
02:52:35.000 He's the greatest.
02:52:37.000 He's up there.
02:52:38.000 He's one of my most important influencers.
02:52:42.000 For sure.
02:52:42.000 When I was at the Comedy Store.
02:52:43.000 Because he was the first guy that I felt like was a real...
02:52:46.000 I was scared of him, man.
02:52:47.000 Because I knew he worked for Pryor.
02:52:49.000 I knew he was like, he's connected to royalty.
02:52:51.000 And he'd be around the comedy store and I'd just be...
02:52:53.000 It's still sharp as a knife, man.
02:52:56.000 It's still right there.
02:52:57.000 This is when I was in my 20s.
02:52:59.000 And he laughed one time.
02:53:02.000 I was on stage in front of like 10 people and I was doing my act.
02:53:04.000 And I heard it in the back of the room.
02:53:06.000 Ah!
02:53:10.000 And then he came up to me afterwards and he said, you're a funny motherfucker.
02:53:13.000 He goes, you did that shit like it was a sold out room.
02:53:17.000 He goes, you're a real comic.
02:53:18.000 And I was like, wow.
02:53:20.000 Like Paul Moon, he said that to me.
02:53:21.000 Because I remember he was connected.
02:53:22.000 He was connected to the man.
02:53:25.000 He was connected to Pryor.
02:53:27.000 He was made.
02:53:27.000 Like all those, the contribution.
02:53:30.000 I mean, I guess maybe it's different in hip-hop, but in stand-up it's similar.
02:53:37.000 There's guys like Bill Burr who writes everything he says.
02:53:41.000 Everything he says is coming from a Bill Burr place of mind.
02:53:43.000 He's not contributing with anybody.
02:53:45.000 He's not collaborating.
02:53:47.000 He's just being Bill Burr.
02:53:50.000 Joey Diaz, same thing.
02:53:51.000 Everything that guy says is coming out of his head.
02:53:55.000 There's something extra to that.
02:53:58.000 It's not better or worse.
02:54:01.000 It's like the difference between you go into a restaurant and everything's homemade.
02:54:07.000 It might be the same as if everything wasn't homemade in terms of the way it tastes, but not the way it feels.
02:54:13.000 Right?
02:54:14.000 It feels different.
02:54:15.000 Like a guy like you writes your own shit.
02:54:18.000 Like when you write your own shit and you play your own songs, it's like I'm getting a piece of you.
02:54:24.000 I'm getting a little piece of you that comes out of your art.
02:54:26.000 That's the difference.
02:54:28.000 It's not like there's anything wrong with collaboration.
02:54:31.000 Collaboration is...
02:54:32.000 Look, if you look at Chris Rock's stuff, it's arguably some of the greatest work of all time in terms of the finished product of stand-up comedy, Bigger and Blacker.
02:54:40.000 It's one of the greatest comedy specials in the history of the world.
02:54:43.000 Period.
02:54:44.000 End of discussion.
02:54:45.000 Anybody that argues with you is an asshole.
02:54:48.000 So that came out of collaborative efforts.
02:54:50.000 There's nothing wrong with that.
02:54:51.000 Obviously, it made something amazing.
02:54:54.000 And many other bits.
02:54:55.000 And many other things that a lot of great comics have done.
02:54:58.000 But it is different, man.
02:55:00.000 It's different.
02:55:01.000 You know?
02:55:02.000 But we're all in some way connected to each other and collaborating with each other whether we like it or not.
02:55:09.000 How many stages into the game are they going to collaborate with you?
02:55:14.000 Are they going to be there for the final product?
02:55:17.000 Or are they just going to be influences along the way in your artistic journey?
02:55:22.000 Yeah, I mean, even the thing that I would consider that I wrote completely by myself, if you get down to the next level, it's like there's 25,000 things that have influenced why I think that way or feel that way.
02:55:39.000 For sure.
02:55:41.000 That's determinism.
02:55:42.000 That's why.
02:55:42.000 That's the whole angle of like there's really nothing new.
02:55:45.000 It's all about the angle and I liken it to like when I watch to I like watching the old Dogtown like documentaries Dogtown and the Z-Boys and shit and it's like the whole approach to skating was like Everybody can do that,
02:56:05.000 but the style you do it in, that's what it really starts coming down to.
02:56:10.000 Again, if there's no brand new invention or brand new event, we're rehashing experiences that have been happening since the dawn of time.
02:56:20.000 You're just finding a new style and a new angle to dress it up in that makes people feel like it's new.
02:56:27.000 Sure.
02:56:27.000 Sorrow, romance, love, anger, all those things.
02:56:32.000 You're breaking the boredom of the way it's been thought of before in a new way.
02:56:37.000 And that's what becomes appealing to people.
02:56:40.000 But goddamn, when someone hits it and they do get through with something that's a new way of describing some shit we can all relate to, it makes you feel so good.
02:56:48.000 Music makes you feel good in a way that comedy never can.
02:56:51.000 Comedy makes you laugh and it makes you have a good time together.
02:56:54.000 We're all in a room laughing, hooting it up.
02:56:56.000 But music, when you're by yourself, man, it's just be you and that music, and you get goosebumps, you can lift more weights, you run faster.
02:57:05.000 It fires you up, man.
02:57:07.000 If I'm running hills and I'm listening to music, I honestly feel like I'm cheating.
02:57:11.000 I feel like I'm cheating.
02:57:13.000 Because I feel like I take this burst of artificial energy that's not dependent upon my discipline or drive.
02:57:19.000 It's not artificial, though.
02:57:21.000 No, it's not, but I didn't make it.
02:57:23.000 Yeah, no, but...
02:57:24.000 Again, see, I don't know if it's some grass is greener shit, and I don't even know if that's the proper phrase, but just when I look at it as an art form, that comparison when you're like, music is this, I'm like, comedy is so much more precious because you work it to that point.
02:57:43.000 Even if you tell an amazing joke that lives in me and I fucking love it so much, I take it and tell it to him.
02:57:50.000 For me, the minute I tell it to him, it ends.
02:57:54.000 It's like that's the end of that joke for me.
02:57:56.000 You know what I mean?
02:57:57.000 So it's like there's a preciousness to that.
02:57:59.000 It's like a fucking...
02:58:01.000 To me, there's a finite...
02:58:03.000 You're creating an art that's almost like a dude who creates art just to fucking watch it.
02:58:11.000 It works once.
02:58:12.000 Some Japanese lantern that's going to just go up in flames and fucking disappear.
02:58:16.000 It's like there's a beauty in that that to me is far different and far more, again, precious because it's...
02:58:25.000 Life is shorter.
02:58:27.000 You have to watch it end.
02:58:28.000 That's my point.
02:58:29.000 You have to watch an idea of yours come to a finite end.
02:58:33.000 Whereas when an idea of mine comes to a finite end and it's good and it connects, I can repeat it over and over and over and people accept that.
02:58:42.000 Yeah.
02:58:45.000 To me, it's just the preciousness of it, if you understand what I'm getting at.
02:58:50.000 It's like, wow, all that work for that.
02:58:54.000 It's almost like the Olympic athlete training his whole life.
02:58:59.000 That's how each joke almost is when you write it.
02:59:02.000 I watch a lot of economy.
02:59:04.000 I'm all over all y'all motherfuckers shit on the one side.
02:59:08.000 They post specials, Bill, all those dudes.
02:59:11.000 I'm Tony.
02:59:12.000 I'm into all this shit.
02:59:13.000 So it's like I'm really a fan of comedy.
02:59:15.000 And it's just amazing to me.
02:59:16.000 Like I said, the finite of this stuff is precious.
02:59:21.000 That's an interesting way of putting it.
02:59:23.000 I never really thought about it that way.
02:59:24.000 I thought about it in the way that you have to write new stuff.
02:59:27.000 But I never thought about it in the way that the first time that someone hears it, that's the only time they really hear it.
02:59:33.000 Every time after that, they know what's coming.
02:59:35.000 They never see it the same way, you know?
02:59:40.000 Again, like an Olympic athlete.
02:59:42.000 You're working that joke.
02:59:43.000 You're working that joke out and the joke's getting better and it's like, okay, it's a bronze medal joke right now and it's a silver medal joke.
02:59:50.000 If you ever get it to that gold medal joke and then you drop it where it's supposed to be in that place in time of the special or the thing that everybody sees, then it's done.
02:59:59.000 You know what's interesting now is there's a lot of comedy nerds.
03:00:02.000 They want to watch the process.
03:00:03.000 So they watch you flip punchlines around and flip things around.
03:00:07.000 And they go, hey, you did that thing different now.
03:00:09.000 I go, yeah, I'm trying to figure out how to do it right.
03:00:11.000 That'd be amazing to me if I had the time to just sit and watch you guys work out.
03:00:14.000 Like go to the comedy club every night or whatever.
03:00:17.000 You see these two ladies from Arizona, and they came down to the store.
03:00:19.000 They travel around the world.
03:00:21.000 They went to see Ari in Europe or Iceland or some shit.
03:00:24.000 But they're comedy nerds, and they come to watch.
03:00:27.000 And they'll see you two months ago, and then they come see you again.
03:00:30.000 I had conversations with them.
03:00:32.000 And they're like, yeah, I like how you switched that up.
03:00:34.000 You put that there, and I'm like, yeah, I'm trying to figure out where to put it.
03:00:37.000 I don't know where that goes.
03:00:38.000 The point is there's a journey there until you get to that point where it's dropped in that special thing that's been seen across a broad spectrum.
03:00:48.000 It is a journey.
03:00:49.000 And they know that because they're fans of the comedy.
03:00:52.000 So they know that thing's going to build into something.
03:00:57.000 That sounds like a fucking amazing time to me.
03:01:00.000 If you're a fan of music, it's hard to go watch people practice.
03:01:05.000 It's different.
03:01:06.000 Yeah.
03:01:06.000 Because you're practicing in front of motherfuckers and they're reacting.
03:01:10.000 I'm practicing.
03:01:11.000 We do it.
03:01:12.000 We call it shedding.
03:01:13.000 Yeah.
03:01:13.000 Because we're locked in a fucking room doing it by ourselves and we ain't going to do it in front of you until we got that shit right.
03:01:19.000 Right.
03:01:19.000 You know?
03:01:20.000 Yeah.
03:01:20.000 We can't do that.
03:01:21.000 We have to do it in front of people.
03:01:23.000 But the weird thing about it is it's like they can come and see it.
03:01:28.000 They can see you practice.
03:01:30.000 People can't see you practice really.
03:01:32.000 It's not practice.
03:01:33.000 You're just fucking...
03:01:35.000 Comedy is performance art.
03:01:37.000 You know what I mean?
03:01:38.000 Yeah, for sure.
03:01:39.000 So it's like you're working it out.
03:01:40.000 You have the concept, but it has to be worked out.
03:01:44.000 It has to be walked to a destination, so to speak.
03:01:46.000 You know what I mean?
03:01:46.000 The other part of it is, though, there's so many more people doing music than there are doing comedy.
03:01:52.000 Like, the waters are, like, less populated.
03:01:54.000 What do you think?
03:01:55.000 Like, the numbers?
03:01:56.000 For sure, right?
03:01:57.000 Oh, absolutely.
03:01:58.000 There's way more great bands than there are great comedians.
03:02:01.000 No, there's not a lot of great bands.
03:02:02.000 There's a lot of fucking artists.
03:02:04.000 Like, there's not a lot of new great bands.
03:02:07.000 Name a couple.
03:02:08.000 New great bands.
03:02:09.000 Oh, yeah, okay.
03:02:09.000 I thought we were talking about, like, what's coming, you know, the newest.
03:02:12.000 I mean, overall, like, people are active currently.
03:02:14.000 Yeah.
03:02:15.000 Dude, Rolling Stones are still on tour.
03:02:17.000 What the fuck is happening?
03:02:18.000 They're just waiting for someone to explode.
03:02:20.000 The funny thing was, I think I went to their farewell tour in like 85 or something like that, dude.
03:02:28.000 God bless them.
03:02:31.000 And everybody back then was saying, isn't it amazing they're still touring?
03:02:35.000 Amazing.
03:02:36.000 Aerosmith 2, same deal.
03:02:38.000 They were probably in their 50s then, you know?
03:02:40.000 Now what, they're like 70s, 80s?
03:02:42.000 Dude, David Lee Roth looks healthy as fuck.
03:02:44.000 It was funny when you had him in your lyrics.
03:02:47.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
03:02:49.000 Dude, he's healthy as fuck, man.
03:02:51.000 That guy has no connection to the outside world.
03:02:53.000 He has a lady he uses.
03:02:55.000 The lady has a phone.
03:02:56.000 She tells David where he should go and when he should meet you.
03:02:59.000 David goes there.
03:03:00.000 David doesn't bring a phone.
03:03:01.000 I don't even know if he had a wallet.
03:03:02.000 I paid for dinner.
03:03:03.000 I'm like, this guy, he's not connected at all to the outside world.
03:03:07.000 He doesn't give a fuck.
03:03:08.000 Smiles at everybody.
03:03:09.000 Couldn't be friendlier.
03:03:10.000 He just knows his vibration.
03:03:12.000 He figured it out and he sticks with it.
03:03:15.000 Can't hate.
03:03:18.000 He's hilarious, man.
03:03:19.000 He's a fascinating cat, that David Lee Roth.
03:03:22.000 You know, he lived in Japan for like a year and learned Kendo, which is the art of sword fighting.
03:03:27.000 He trained under a Japanese master.
03:03:29.000 He brought his dog, rented an apartment, got a fucking apartment in Tokyo, and just every day went to Kendo practice.
03:03:35.000 He got whacked with bamboo swords.
03:03:38.000 One of my drummers, the guy, he's Nick Fish, he's actually the band Fishbone, he's one of the namesakes, and he's into all that, like heavy jiu-jitsu, but like martial arts, but he's weapons trained like crazy.
03:03:51.000 A lot of people are into it.
03:03:52.000 How many people move to Japan?
03:03:55.000 To train with a Japanese kendo master for a fucking year.
03:03:59.000 He didn't even speak Japanese.
03:04:01.000 He brings his dog to the other side of the planet to learn sword fighting for a year.
03:04:07.000 And he's David Lee Roth.
03:04:10.000 Did he learn Japanese though?
03:04:11.000 Oh, he learned a lot of shit, yeah.
03:04:13.000 He can speak like a broken version, I'm sure, of Japanese.
03:04:16.000 But I bet his kendo's pretty badass.
03:04:18.000 I don't want to sword fight him.
03:04:20.000 He really went for it, you know?
03:04:22.000 He trained martial arts and karate and kickboxing under Benny Herkides.
03:04:28.000 Benny the Jet Herkides, who was like a California legend, a world legend.
03:04:32.000 At a gym like in Van Nuys, right?
03:04:33.000 Yeah, Van Nuys.
03:04:34.000 When I first came to California, there was two things that I needed to do.
03:04:37.000 I needed to go to the comedy store first and foremost.
03:04:40.000 Number two is I needed to go to the Jet Center.
03:04:42.000 The Jet Center was Benny the Jet's place at Van Nuys.
03:04:44.000 I think I shot my first album cover there.
03:04:47.000 Dude!
03:04:47.000 Did you really?
03:04:48.000 Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
03:04:49.000 That's crazy.
03:04:49.000 What year?
03:04:50.000 Like 1988. Oh my god.
03:04:52.000 I wasn't out here yet.
03:04:54.000 That's crazy.
03:04:54.000 I was just starting comedy.
03:04:56.000 This is the first ever last record with Ice-T. Ice-T had signed me to his label.
03:05:03.000 Yeah, I got here too late, man.
03:05:05.000 I got here in 94 and the gym had been so badly damaged by the earthquake that when it started raining, it was a year after the earthquake, When it started raining, the rain was leaking all throughout the ceiling.
03:05:16.000 The ceiling was a wreck, and they had a band in the building, and I don't think they ever...
03:05:19.000 They started off another place in North Hollywood, but it wasn't quite the same thing.
03:05:23.000 The Jet Center in Van Nuys was one of those places.
03:05:25.000 No, I'm positive now that's where it is.
03:05:27.000 It's because it's a boxing ring, and I remember the Jet Center.
03:05:30.000 That's where we started.
03:05:31.000 That's how I knew about bands.
03:05:33.000 That's how I learned about them.
03:05:34.000 Tough dudes, man.
03:05:35.000 I went there.
03:05:35.000 I was so nervous.
03:05:37.000 I came here from New York, and I was still sparring back then.
03:05:40.000 I hadn't decided to stop sparring yet.
03:05:42.000 I just needed something to do, and I was out here doing TV work, and I was training with all these gangbangers, man.
03:05:48.000 I remember this one dude, he had something on his back.
03:05:51.000 I don't remember what the name of the gang was, like, Flatas or something like that, and then it just said, fuck the rest, on his back.
03:06:01.000 And I remember thinking, Jesus.
03:06:02.000 And one of the guys, like Blinky Rodriguez, who was a world-class, world-championship-level kickboxer, he knocked out Jean-Eve Theriault.
03:06:10.000 He was like a top-of-the-food-chain kickboxer.
03:06:13.000 He had a son that succumbed to gang violence.
03:06:16.000 And so he worked really...
03:06:17.000 I'm pretty sure this is a story.
03:06:22.000 We're good to go.
03:06:40.000 I'm from the suburbs of Boston, okay?
03:06:43.000 And I'm a comedian, and I'm like fucking 26 years old, but I'm hanging out with gangbangers in this hardcore kickboxing gym of one of my martial arts idols, Benny Urquidez, and another one, Blinky Rodriguez, who was another one of my martial arts idols.
03:06:59.000 And they didn't know who the fuck I was, and I was just in there training with them, and then it went under.
03:07:03.000 And I was like, if I got this brief glimpse into this place that was...
03:07:09.000 In my childhood, like, martial arts childhood, like, that was one of the meccas that I needed to go to.
03:07:14.000 I needed to go to the Jet Center.
03:07:17.000 But it just, it all went away.
03:07:18.000 Real quick, like, within, I don't know, I don't know how many months after I joined there.
03:07:23.000 The name of the album was Forever Everlasting.
03:07:25.000 That's crazy.
03:07:26.000 It's me, like, in a corner of a, you know, because they had the Everlasting, they had me in a boxing ring, and I was fucking, yeah, that was the Jet Center, we shot that.
03:07:33.000 Benny the Jet was nasty, man.
03:07:35.000 There you go.
03:07:35.000 There it is.
03:07:36.000 There you go.
03:07:37.000 Wow.
03:07:37.000 That's actually my father.
03:07:38.000 I bought that, bro.
03:07:39.000 That's my father on the upper right there.
03:07:42.000 Dude, I bought that.
03:07:44.000 Guaranteed I bought that CD. 100%.
03:07:46.000 100% I bought that CD. Yeah, that was all at the Jet Center, man.
03:07:49.000 Wow.
03:07:51.000 That guy was a legend, man.
03:07:52.000 Benny Arquitas was a beast.
03:07:54.000 He would go to Hawaii and fight in these crazy mix tournaments where they'd do judo on you and boxing and all kinds of crazy shit.
03:08:01.000 Those guys were the originators, man.
03:08:03.000 They were the hardcore second wave after Bruce Lee.
03:08:06.000 God damn!
03:08:07.000 Look at that, you handsome bastard.
03:08:09.000 God damn!
03:08:10.000 Dude, I got like a little Hitler stash or something going on there.
03:08:13.000 I think I was trying to grow it.
03:08:14.000 Yeah!
03:08:16.000 You look like a quarterback in a movie.
03:08:18.000 Like a high school movie.
03:08:20.000 Like Friday Night Lights.
03:08:23.000 One guy's like a big, burly asshole.
03:08:26.000 I was, I think, 16 right there, man.
03:08:29.000 That shot is taken by a legendary photographer by the name of Glenn Friedman, man.
03:08:33.000 He took many, many of the most iconic shots ever, dude.
03:08:36.000 Shout out to Glenn.
03:08:37.000 You would play a perfect guy in a movie about a quarterback who's an asshole to his girlfriend.
03:08:41.000 There's another guy in the school, and he's real sensitive, and he writes poetry, and the girl wants to be with him.
03:08:46.000 I want to kick his ass.
03:08:48.000 Yeah, that's you right there.
03:08:49.000 Yeah, bully him.
03:08:52.000 Listen, man, it's late as fuck.
03:08:53.000 Right.
03:08:54.000 20 to 7. You want to play one more song and get out of here?
03:08:56.000 Yeah.
03:08:57.000 Shall we?
03:08:57.000 Let's do that.
03:08:58.000 Let's do a break it down.
03:09:00.000 Tell everybody, DJ Melo, please give up your credentials and social media.
03:09:05.000 DJ Melody.
03:09:07.000 Is it just DJ Melody?
03:09:08.000 Yeah, DJ Melody on Instagram.
03:09:10.000 And like I said, Beat Junkies Institute of Sound.
03:09:13.000 Check it out.
03:09:14.000 And all on Instagram, Twitter, all that jazz.
03:09:18.000 They can find it from there.
03:09:19.000 Yes, sir.
03:09:20.000 Whitey Ford's House of Pain is the album.
03:09:22.000 Woo!
03:09:23.000 All these songs are from that.
03:09:25.000 And, uh, yeah.
03:09:27.000 Here we got one more for you.
03:09:28.000 One more.
03:09:29.000 Play you out.
03:09:30.000 Alright.
03:09:31.000 You ready?
03:10:04.000 We're good to go.
03:10:41.000 Old friends like Lisa Scottie, back where everything still matters.
03:10:46.000 Sometimes things just never go your way.
03:10:50.000 Roosed and broke, but I'm surviving all these miles that I've been driving.
03:10:56.000 Got all my hopes in this old blue Chevrolet.
03:10:59.000 I'm bringing it home.
03:11:04.000 Building this wall around my heart for so long.
03:11:08.000 And I'm bringing it home to you.
03:11:32.000 Break it down!
03:11:33.000 Break it down!
03:11:34.000 Break it down!
03:11:38.000 Break it down!
03:12:08.000 Break it down!
03:12:10.000 And I'm bringing it home to you, baby.
03:12:13.000 Come home.
03:12:15.000 I've been building this wall around my heart for so long.
03:12:20.000 And I'm bringing it home to you, baby.
03:12:23.000 Come home.
03:12:25.000 Girl, you got the one to be around.
03:12:29.000 You can help me.
03:12:35.000 Couldn't this fall around my heart for so long?
03:12:39.000 Bring it in!
03:13:08.000 Joe Rogan Experience.
03:13:11.000 Beach Junkies, DJ Melody.
03:13:14.000 Thank you guys, that was awesome.
03:13:16.000 Thanks brother, it was fun.
03:13:18.000 That was a good day today, it was fun.
03:13:19.000 It was beautiful, it was beautiful.
03:13:20.000 Good night everybody.