The Joe Rogan Experience - August 14, 2020


Joe Rogan Experience #1525 - Tim Dillon


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 16 minutes

Words per Minute

209.22102

Word Count

28,604

Sentence Count

3,333

Misogynist Sentences

119

Hate Speech Sentences

75


Summary

On this week's episode, the boys discuss the recent events that have happened in LA, including the recent shooting of Kobe Bryant, the ongoing protests in Chicago, and the upcoming mid-term elections. They also talk about who they think is going to be the next president, and whether or not they think Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump will win the election. Also, the guys talk about how they think Alyssa Milano will do a great job as the Democratic presidential candidate, and why they think she should run for President in 2020. And, of course, there's a little bit of politics, too. Don't miss it! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. The opinions stated here are our own, not those of our companies, unless otherwise stated. We do not own the rights to any music used in this episode. All credit given to artists and labels given to their respective record labels and labels. This episode was produced and edited by our patrons. Thank you to my good friend Tim Dillon. Tim is a standup comedian, comedian, actor, writer, and podcaster. He is the host of the podcast and is also the creator of . Tim's music is also a writer, producer, editor, and is a regular contributor of is a writer and producer, and his music is provided by his own website , and his social media team is also listed here. Thanks to our sponsor, ( ) and as well done by for producing this episode of , in this podcast, and his good friend thanks to , our good friend, , is & on s . . and our social media thank you ! we are also @ , we also has a artist at , , , his music is , my , the podcast , & , etc. is also , thank you, is . , and , he is and my ) and . Thank you, Tim's , all of our thanks , they are , thanks, & our has , . , your of the , so thank you , and all of your support, and ) , .


Transcript

00:00:01.000 Tim Dillon, fresh off a COVID test.
00:00:02.000 How you feeling, buddy?
00:00:03.000 How's the nose?
00:00:04.000 Feeling good.
00:00:04.000 You know, when I go out with friends to restaurants in LA, they, you know, everybody gets the gun, the temperature gun to your head.
00:00:13.000 But you know what's fucked up?
00:00:14.000 A lot of my friends, they don't do it.
00:00:16.000 They do it to me.
00:00:17.000 And I'm like, I guess I'm the only one that looks sick.
00:00:19.000 Because they look at me and they go, get him, get him.
00:00:22.000 And then I ask other people, I'm like, were you hit on the way in?
00:00:24.000 They're like, no.
00:00:26.000 So I'm like, yeah, it's weird.
00:00:27.000 It's like arbitrary the way they do it.
00:00:29.000 They're supposed to get everybody.
00:00:30.000 I know.
00:00:30.000 Maybe they think like you're a little bit overweight.
00:00:32.000 Yeah.
00:00:33.000 You could die.
00:00:33.000 They're like, we don't want him dying at Boa Steakhouse in West Hollywood.
00:00:37.000 Oh, you could eat outside at Boa.
00:00:37.000 They don't want me falling on a TikToker.
00:00:40.000 Boa's an outside place.
00:00:41.000 Boa's all outside, yeah.
00:00:42.000 You could eat there.
00:00:42.000 All outside.
00:00:43.000 Oh.
00:00:44.000 Yeah.
00:00:45.000 Those outside places, they're doing good.
00:00:47.000 They're jammed.
00:00:48.000 But the fucking inside places are doomed.
00:00:50.000 They're doomed.
00:00:51.000 And they will not reopen.
00:00:52.000 Many of them.
00:00:52.000 A lot of them.
00:00:53.000 Yeah.
00:00:54.000 Yeah.
00:00:54.000 It's a big problem.
00:00:55.000 Let me ask you this.
00:00:56.000 When do you think Los Angeles is going to open back up again?
00:01:00.000 Next spring?
00:01:01.000 Wow.
00:01:03.000 Like April?
00:01:04.000 Well, I mean, it depends what this second wave does, right?
00:01:07.000 If there is a second wave.
00:01:08.000 Do we get clobbered in the fall?
00:01:12.000 I mean by the time LA reopens, it's gonna be Terminator here.
00:01:17.000 Don't you think that it's gonna be Terminator after November no matter what we do?
00:01:20.000 Probably.
00:01:21.000 I feel like with all of the fucking tension, like there was a story in Chicago, right?
00:01:28.000 They thought it was a 15 year old girl was shot by the police, it turned out to be a 20 year old man, and he was shot but he was still alive.
00:01:35.000 How did they get that wrong?
00:01:37.000 The fucking telephone game.
00:01:38.000 Right.
00:01:39.000 You know that game.
00:01:39.000 Yeah.
00:01:40.000 It doesn't work.
00:01:40.000 It's crazy.
00:01:41.000 So then everybody goes crazy and goes looting.
00:01:43.000 So people are looking for an excuse to go crazy.
00:01:46.000 If Trump wins a game- Yeah, it's going to burn.
00:01:48.000 Not only that, it's going to be the mail-in thing.
00:01:51.000 Right?
00:01:52.000 Are they going to take days?
00:01:53.000 100%.
00:01:54.000 Wow.
00:01:54.000 Yeah, so it's going to take days.
00:01:56.000 I mean, I would assume they're going to have some polls open some places.
00:01:59.000 And we're not going to know.
00:02:00.000 We're not going to have an answer that night.
00:02:02.000 No.
00:02:03.000 That's going to be a fun week of not knowing who the president is.
00:02:06.000 Remember when it happened in 2000?
00:02:07.000 No one cared.
00:02:08.000 It was funny that we didn't have a president.
00:02:11.000 Like, there was all those SNL skits, and everybody was making fun of it.
00:02:14.000 There was no real unrest in 2000. But now we cannot handle the uncertainty of not knowing.
00:02:23.000 We need to know that night.
00:02:24.000 Yeah, the dangling Chad's thing, it was no big deal.
00:02:26.000 Yeah, it was funny.
00:02:27.000 Everybody was wondering.
00:02:28.000 Everybody was like, what are we doing?
00:02:30.000 Laugh it off.
00:02:31.000 We were all going, we don't need a president.
00:02:32.000 Yeah, whatever.
00:02:33.000 We were so much more emotionally healthy as a country at that moment than we are now.
00:02:38.000 Yeah.
00:02:39.000 This is funny, but it is true.
00:02:41.000 Yeah, because we laughed.
00:02:42.000 We go, yeah, who cares?
00:02:43.000 They go, we're fine.
00:02:45.000 But now it's like...
00:02:47.000 Chaos.
00:02:47.000 And we need a break.
00:02:49.000 We need a break.
00:02:51.000 Everybody can't be a political pundit.
00:02:54.000 My aunt cannot be writing about trade on Facebook.
00:02:58.000 I think we should just leave it all to Alyssa Milano.
00:03:01.000 Yeah.
00:03:02.000 I'm looking forward to her tweets in November.
00:03:05.000 I'm just going to follow all that.
00:03:06.000 Yeah.
00:03:06.000 Yeah.
00:03:07.000 Well, she was like...
00:03:09.000 She's got a podcast.
00:03:10.000 We know that.
00:03:11.000 She's fine.
00:03:12.000 Yeah.
00:03:12.000 I mean, it's relevant.
00:03:13.000 It's right.
00:03:13.000 They're all trying to be relevant.
00:03:15.000 Everybody's relevant.
00:03:16.000 They have to be...
00:03:17.000 You have to get your opinion out there.
00:03:18.000 It's super important.
00:03:19.000 And that's the way to be relevant now is to just be...
00:03:22.000 You know, like, be political.
00:03:25.000 All day.
00:03:25.000 Every day.
00:03:26.000 That shift where you go from actor to activist.
00:03:28.000 Yeah.
00:03:29.000 All in.
00:03:29.000 Very interesting.
00:03:30.000 As soon as the fucking calls stop coming in, you're like, alright, I'm an activist.
00:03:33.000 What's so funny is we know, because we're in this thing, that getting good at this, whether it's comedy or being an actor, it's very tough.
00:03:43.000 You're not spending your life thinking about other people.
00:03:46.000 Let's just be real, for the most part.
00:03:48.000 You're just not.
00:03:49.000 I didn't.
00:03:50.000 You're thinking about your career.
00:03:51.000 Yeah, you're thinking about your career.
00:03:52.000 I've spent the last decade thinking about myself, my jokes.
00:03:56.000 How do I get ahead?
00:03:57.000 How do I get ahead?
00:03:58.000 How do I get on television for three minutes?
00:04:01.000 So this idea that these people are now going to pretend that they've spent their entire career thinking about global warming...
00:04:12.000 It's just not true.
00:04:14.000 I've met these people, and my friends have opened for some of these people, and I know that these people are going out there and they're like, you know, listen, we've got to do this, we've got to do that, they've got to move the country forward.
00:04:26.000 But I've seen them make people cry backstage in a theater because there's not enough water in the dressing room.
00:04:32.000 So it's those same people that are really cruel because Going out and telling everybody how good of a person they are all the time.
00:04:40.000 Well, they find the pattern.
00:04:41.000 They find the pattern, the way they have to talk and the things they have to talk about.
00:04:45.000 They lock into those things with no deviation.
00:04:48.000 They find whatever the line is where Hollywood wants, whatever the line is always left.
00:04:53.000 It's always super progressive, always super woke, and they fucking ride that line like a fucking railroad train.
00:05:00.000 Just choo choo straight down, no deviation.
00:05:02.000 It's so obvious.
00:05:04.000 I know dudes I used to do open mics with who, like, they're tweeting at Mayor Garcetti.
00:05:10.000 They're tweeting about the budget in LA. They're like, the budget's being passed.
00:05:16.000 They're tweeting the budget.
00:05:17.000 I'm like, God, you don't have the money to pay your rent.
00:05:22.000 You have no idea what's going on in the world.
00:05:25.000 And you're tweeting at Garcetti.
00:05:27.000 And they're doing it so that they can get a job.
00:05:30.000 They're doing it so that somebody can see him and go, you know what?
00:05:33.000 He had a great Garcetti tweet.
00:05:35.000 He should write on BoJack Horseman.
00:05:39.000 That's the way it works!
00:05:40.000 It does kind of work like that.
00:05:42.000 I've never been more amused.
00:05:46.000 It's very funny.
00:05:47.000 But I'm also terrified.
00:05:49.000 It's very, we're gonna die.
00:05:51.000 It has both of those things happening.
00:05:54.000 It's like part of me is laughing at how stereotypical everybody is and how cliche.
00:05:58.000 But then part of me is like, this is terrifying.
00:06:01.000 People at each other's throats.
00:06:03.000 It's terrifying.
00:06:04.000 People are enemies now.
00:06:06.000 Listen, people never loved each other because it's a competitive business, but people...
00:06:12.000 It wasn't nearly as intense as it is right now.
00:06:16.000 The feeling of like, if you disagree with somebody, they are your enemy in comedy.
00:06:22.000 And they want you to not have a job.
00:06:24.000 And I've never felt that way about anybody.
00:06:26.000 I don't care what you...
00:06:27.000 If you're funny, I truly don't care.
00:06:30.000 If you're a communist, if you're a whatever.
00:06:33.000 Whatever you are, you don't have any power.
00:06:36.000 It's not like you're affecting my life.
00:06:37.000 You can believe whatever you want.
00:06:39.000 If you're funny, you're funny.
00:06:40.000 I don't like to say this in generalizations because I don't believe in generalizations.
00:06:44.000 Right.
00:06:44.000 I love them.
00:06:45.000 I do too.
00:06:46.000 They're fun.
00:06:47.000 I need them.
00:06:48.000 They're the best for comedy.
00:06:49.000 I mean, we need them.
00:06:50.000 Without generalizations, comedy kind of sucks.
00:06:52.000 Yeah.
00:06:52.000 But more people on the left are doing this than people on the right.
00:06:57.000 I don't see that many people on the right.
00:07:00.000 I see a few, but I don't see as many people on the right calling for people to get canceled forever.
00:07:04.000 But the people on the left are like, burn their house, burn them to the ground.
00:07:07.000 Well, the right will do it.
00:07:09.000 I mean, the QAnon thing is kind of a way they're doing it, where they're like...
00:07:13.000 David Spade's got an ankle bracelet on and he's in jail and Trump's put everyone under house arrest.
00:07:19.000 Like, they're in this other thing where it's like, oh, you guys have left the planet.
00:07:25.000 Explain to people who don't know what this QAnon show is.
00:07:28.000 Well, the QAnon stuff is like, there's this idea that there's an intelligence dissemination operation happening, meaning behind the scenes, high-level intelligence guys or military people are leaking information about a shadow war that we don't really see happening.
00:07:42.000 And the shadow war involves Trump and the people on the side of lightness battling these deep state pedophile cannibals.
00:07:53.000 I don't know why...
00:07:54.000 I never understood why they have to be cannibals.
00:07:57.000 I didn't know they were cannibals.
00:07:58.000 No, they're cannibals.
00:07:59.000 They're eating children, and then they get the adrenochrome to keep them young.
00:08:02.000 Oh, that's right.
00:08:02.000 And then Trump is going to war with all of them.
00:08:05.000 Right.
00:08:06.000 Now listen, pedophilia is a big problem.
00:08:08.000 They do cover up shit at high levels, 100%.
00:08:11.000 Yes.
00:08:11.000 Yeah.
00:08:33.000 Who is a little wild that everyone in Hollywood's eating children and there's tunnels under Central Park.
00:08:39.000 I mean, it's hard to keep up with.
00:08:41.000 And the Q drops, so to speak, are like these, you know, they're like poems or they're coded information.
00:08:49.000 So it's never like, hey, this is what's happening.
00:08:52.000 Where do you get these drops?
00:08:53.000 Where do you get them?
00:08:53.000 4chan or something?
00:08:54.000 You get them like on 4chan.
00:08:55.000 Okay, but 4chan is the best place in the world for trolls.
00:08:59.000 Well, that's what maybe this is.
00:09:01.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:09:02.000 Yeah, it could be a high-level troll.
00:09:03.000 Nobody knows.
00:09:04.000 Because it has nuggets of truth, just like anything else, right?
00:09:08.000 It has nuggets of very real things.
00:09:10.000 The government is shady as fuck.
00:09:11.000 A lot of the elites are doing things, engaging in pedophilia, and probably worse.
00:09:16.000 Some of those kids on Epstein's Island probably did disappear.
00:09:20.000 But the idea that Trump is fighting this underground war and it's all about human traffic, I just don't think that's borne out by the facts.
00:09:29.000 There's no facts to point.
00:09:31.000 I mean, Trump was friends with the Clintons for his whole life.
00:09:34.000 Well, not only that, if Trump was doing it and not talking about it, it would be so out of character.
00:09:40.000 Right.
00:09:41.000 Like, imagine this one thing that he's doing is the most noble thing that he's ever done, ever.
00:09:46.000 Right, he's not mentioning it.
00:09:47.000 The most selfless, the most important, for humanity.
00:09:51.000 And he's not even bringing it up.
00:09:52.000 He's just secretly winking at all the Q people.
00:09:54.000 Well, you know, and so everything he does, there's like a reason he does it, they say.
00:09:58.000 Like, when he wishes Lane Maxwell, he goes, I wish her well.
00:10:00.000 Yeah.
00:10:01.000 Now, the thing is, that's a rich guy who's forgetting he's the president, who's just on a tee at Mar-a-Lago, because that's how rich people talk.
00:10:08.000 I mean, that's literally, and I've been around a few, like, really wealthy people.
00:10:11.000 This is how they talk.
00:10:12.000 When you say something bad, anything bad, if you go, you know, John's wife has cancer, you know, their kid had a dewey, he's got a problem, he had a couple incidents there at Harvard.
00:10:21.000 They go like, this guy, I wish him well.
00:10:23.000 Tee off.
00:10:24.000 That's how they talk.
00:10:26.000 It's just a dismissal.
00:10:28.000 It's a way to dismiss it.
00:10:29.000 But the Q people are like, oh, there's a meaning.
00:10:32.000 There's hidden meaning.
00:10:33.000 He's saying that she's...
00:10:35.000 And if you look at Ivanka's wearing this dress and it means...
00:10:38.000 And it's just like, listen, I'm a conspiracy guy, but this is exhausting.
00:10:41.000 Well, the I don't care, do you, jacket?
00:10:44.000 The jacket?
00:10:45.000 Yeah.
00:10:45.000 I don't care, do you?
00:10:46.000 Isn't that what it said?
00:10:47.000 Yeah, I don't care, I don't really care, do you.
00:10:48.000 Right.
00:10:49.000 What?
00:10:49.000 Yeah, I mean, it's weird.
00:10:51.000 What the fuck is this?
00:10:51.000 Yeah, these are weird things.
00:10:53.000 What are we doing?
00:10:53.000 So I think the Trump administration feeds the trolls.
00:10:56.000 Like, I think they like it.
00:10:57.000 I think he'll, by the time the election rolls around, he'll be like full, full Q, just leaning in.
00:11:02.000 Who's behind the scenes pulling the strings?
00:11:04.000 Is it Ivanka?
00:11:05.000 They say J.R. Kushner has a lot of power.
00:11:07.000 But wouldn't it be funny if it was Ivanka doing the whole thing?
00:11:09.000 It could be.
00:11:10.000 If she's the one stroking her chin, like, hmm.
00:11:12.000 She's the boss.
00:11:12.000 What is the nugget we release next?
00:11:15.000 She's QAnon.
00:11:16.000 She's the smart one who's setting it all up.
00:11:20.000 She's the pretty daughter.
00:11:21.000 Everybody dismisses her.
00:11:23.000 Nobody takes her seriously.
00:11:25.000 She's in the background of the whole fucking show with black leather gloves on.
00:11:29.000 That go to the elbow gloves?
00:11:31.000 Like the Inspector Gadget hand?
00:11:32.000 You just see your hand typing on 4chan?
00:11:35.000 Send?
00:11:35.000 Send?
00:11:36.000 Yeah, I don't know, man.
00:11:39.000 You know, Steve Bannon said something.
00:11:41.000 There was a documentary about...
00:11:42.000 Errol Morris made a documentary about Steve Bannon.
00:11:45.000 Steve Bannon said this very interesting thing.
00:11:47.000 He said, you know...
00:11:48.000 There's a guy out there who's got a horrible life.
00:11:51.000 He's divorced.
00:11:51.000 His kids don't like him.
00:11:52.000 He has a shitty job.
00:11:53.000 But when he plays League of Legends or World of Warcraft, one of these games, he's a hero.
00:11:58.000 And when he dies in real life, nobody really cares.
00:12:00.000 But when he dies in the game, so many people come out and they show him respect because you're playing with people from all over the world.
00:12:06.000 So Bannon's like, which life is the real life?
00:12:10.000 Which, of course, it's the real one that you're living, not this fantasy game.
00:12:14.000 But I think the QAnon thing, I think...
00:12:16.000 The Trump administration is like, yeah, let people believe they're hunting pedophiles online.
00:12:21.000 It gives their lives meaning.
00:12:22.000 Let these people believe they're hunting the Clintons.
00:12:25.000 It's like fun.
00:12:26.000 It's like a fun video game for them, and then they don't have to ask why they don't have health insurance and can't get a knee operation.
00:12:32.000 I don't think that it's that involved.
00:12:35.000 I think it's just a thing that's happening that happens to fit in with human nature.
00:12:39.000 That's probably true, too.
00:12:40.000 I don't believe that the Trump administration has the resources to do that, but still, they would have to be so 4-D chess.
00:12:50.000 I think they may encourage it a little.
00:12:53.000 I think they may just pour a little gasoline on it.
00:12:56.000 Maybe.
00:12:56.000 Yeah!
00:12:57.000 Maybe.
00:12:57.000 Why not?
00:12:58.000 If they think that's their base.
00:12:59.000 Yeah, they're like, why not?
00:13:00.000 They're having fun.
00:13:01.000 When you go out to a Trump rally, you want a little fun.
00:13:04.000 Oh, for sure.
00:13:05.000 Yeah.
00:13:06.000 The things that he does that are mistakes, like these interviews that he does, where he'll argue about shit.
00:13:14.000 He'll argue about how well they're doing, or what's wrong, or what he got right, or what his IQ is, or how well he did at this intelligence test.
00:13:25.000 Anybody who's playing 3D chess is not going to do that.
00:13:27.000 No.
00:13:28.000 No, he's not playing any chess, I think.
00:13:30.000 He's going by instinct.
00:13:31.000 He's riffing, and we've said it before.
00:13:33.000 I've said it on the show before.
00:13:35.000 It's amazing to watch a guy get up, no material, and just crush.
00:13:40.000 He's really going by instinct.
00:13:43.000 He's perfectly suited for this era because he's hypnotizing.
00:13:49.000 If you start listening to him, you can't stop.
00:13:51.000 I'll try to watch one five-minute clip of an interview.
00:13:53.000 I end up watching the whole hour.
00:13:55.000 Yeah.
00:13:55.000 Because he's like, there's a hypnotic thing that's going on where he just is up and down and you just, you can't not listen.
00:14:02.000 Have you ever seen Scott Adams talk about him?
00:14:04.000 No.
00:14:04.000 Scott Adams is an interesting guy.
00:14:06.000 He's a very intelligent guy.
00:14:07.000 He wrote the Dilbert comics.
00:14:09.000 You know what he is?
00:14:10.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:14:10.000 So he's basically saying that Trump is like a master persuader, and Scott Adams understands hypnosis and persuasion, and he's talking about the way the guy does it and how he does it, that he's a master persuader.
00:14:24.000 A lot of people disagree with him, but what's interesting is he doesn't even vote.
00:14:28.000 Scott Adams doesn't vote, and he's not really a Trump supporter, although he does say a lot of things that seem to I think he leans towards Trump being more persuasive than just going by his gut, because it sort of fills his...
00:14:43.000 He's got this theory that aligns with his theory, so he goes along.
00:14:48.000 I see him leaning into it a little bit, where it's not like he's totally objective about it.
00:14:52.000 But he's lost millions of dollars because of this.
00:14:54.000 Millions.
00:14:55.000 Really?
00:14:55.000 Like, people have turned on him.
00:14:58.000 He was saying on Twitter the other day that people slowed down in front of his house, started screaming that he's a racist.
00:15:03.000 Jesus.
00:15:04.000 For nothing.
00:15:05.000 Just because he said that Trump is persuasive.
00:15:08.000 Right.
00:15:09.000 And that he said that he thinks Trump is essentially pulling people's strings and manipulating people in a really interesting way.
00:15:16.000 Yeah.
00:15:16.000 And he is.
00:15:17.000 I mean, like, any president does that.
00:15:20.000 But Trump does it extremely well.
00:15:22.000 Well, he does it a non-presidential way.
00:15:24.000 Right.
00:15:24.000 That's what's weird.
00:15:25.000 That's a weird way of doing it.
00:15:27.000 I love con artists and grifters, and to me, Trump is the highest level, biggest con ever, most successful, you know, without a question.
00:15:35.000 I mean, like, you know, he's the king of all of those guys.
00:15:38.000 Every guy sitting in an office right now, calling people up, trying to sell him shit over the phone, that's the...
00:15:44.000 Trump's the king.
00:15:45.000 That's the guy.
00:15:45.000 Trump's the highest level that you can...
00:15:47.000 I mean, anybody...
00:15:49.000 I mean, if you're using a fake ID to try to buy cigarettes, up the ladder, there's Donald Trump.
00:15:56.000 Like, all the way up the ladder.
00:15:57.000 And that, to me, I think, because everyone's like, he's evil, or he's Jesus.
00:16:01.000 It's like...
00:16:03.000 I don't look at things that emotionally because I guess I'm just not a total loser.
00:16:06.000 I think that's really what it is.
00:16:08.000 Probably.
00:16:08.000 I think if you're really, if you have nothing going on, everything becomes about politics, which I'm never going to meet Nancy Pelosi.
00:16:16.000 I mean, this is a television show.
00:16:17.000 I'm not saying that real things don't happen, that people aren't affected.
00:16:21.000 But this day-to-day, you're inundated with, like, he said, she said, Pelosi, Schumer.
00:16:27.000 It's like, dude...
00:16:28.000 Who cares?
00:16:30.000 My favorite Pelosi and Schumer image of all time was them with the African outfit on, on their knees, not realizing that the cloth pattern they're wearing was from a tribe that was notorious for selling slaves.
00:16:44.000 They were notorious for being a major part of the slave trade.
00:16:48.000 Well, so was the Democratic Party for many years.
00:16:51.000 Let's be honest.
00:16:52.000 That's what people don't know.
00:16:53.000 When you go way back to the Democrats, the Democrats were the Confederates.
00:16:58.000 Whoops.
00:16:58.000 It's just we've been looking at these people for too long.
00:17:01.000 Got that image?
00:17:02.000 That's amazing.
00:17:03.000 That's good, but it's not as good as the one when they're on their knees.
00:17:06.000 I love the hands on the hips.
00:17:07.000 Oh, and the mask as well.
00:17:09.000 They've got everything going on there.
00:17:10.000 Boss bitch, yeah.
00:17:11.000 Yeah, it's beautiful.
00:17:12.000 Someone was saying that, like, well, you have to respect Nancy Pelosi.
00:17:15.000 Someone said that to me.
00:17:16.000 And I said, she wants 16-year-olds to be able to vote.
00:17:19.000 They look, by the way, like invaders that just came into a country, slaughtered people, and took their clothing.
00:17:24.000 Hopped off of a boat.
00:17:25.000 Yeah.
00:17:25.000 Yeah, they look like people that just colonized an area and took their cloth.
00:17:29.000 Yeah, they're wearing like swamp boots.
00:17:31.000 Isn't she like, how old is she?
00:17:33.000 A million.
00:17:33.000 She's a million years old.
00:17:34.000 I mean, does anyone retire?
00:17:37.000 Does anyone step away?
00:17:38.000 No, you die at a Trump rally like Herman Cain.
00:17:40.000 Yeah.
00:17:42.000 What are you going to do?
00:17:43.000 Respect to Herman Cain.
00:17:44.000 Respect.
00:17:44.000 No mask.
00:17:45.000 Godfather's Pizza.
00:17:46.000 Yeah.
00:17:47.000 Went out there.
00:17:47.000 No mask.
00:17:48.000 He does what he wants.
00:17:49.000 But he had cancer.
00:17:50.000 Did he?
00:17:50.000 He had cancer, I think.
00:17:52.000 Oh, did he?
00:17:53.000 Yeah.
00:17:54.000 Well, he died of COVID. Yeah.
00:17:56.000 If you have COVID and you die of cancer, you still die of COVID. Right.
00:17:58.000 If you get hit by a car, you die of COVID. I don't think they do it that far.
00:18:02.000 Well, you'll see.
00:18:03.000 We'll see.
00:18:03.000 There's going to be a documentary in a few years about this.
00:18:06.000 I don't know.
00:18:07.000 New York Times is saying today they think it's underreported.
00:18:09.000 They think that the COVID deaths are somewhere around 200,000.
00:18:13.000 Yeah, I mean, at a certain point, you have to stop reading because everything you read every hour contradicts the last thing you've read.
00:18:23.000 And they're like, it's airborne.
00:18:25.000 No, it's not.
00:18:26.000 Yes, it is.
00:18:26.000 No, it's not.
00:18:27.000 I'm like...
00:18:29.000 What do I do?
00:18:30.000 You can get it off surfaces.
00:18:30.000 No, you can't.
00:18:31.000 Just kill me.
00:18:32.000 I don't know what's happening.
00:18:34.000 They don't know.
00:18:35.000 That's the problem.
00:18:36.000 They're making it up on the go because they're getting new data all the time.
00:18:39.000 They're constantly getting new information, new studies, new things.
00:18:42.000 But they don't react to all the studies.
00:18:44.000 One of the big ones is the fact that it dies in sunlight.
00:18:47.000 So if that's the case, well, you should let people do all sorts of outdoor activities.
00:18:51.000 These studies, when you read about the studies, they're like, we sampled a certain amount of people and this is what we found.
00:18:57.000 And it's like, that's not necessarily indicative of anything.
00:19:02.000 Well, it's...
00:19:03.000 It's information.
00:19:04.000 It's better than nothing.
00:19:04.000 Yeah, and it depends on who's reading the study and what their bias is and what they're trying to say.
00:19:10.000 But it's clear that they're trying to figure this out.
00:19:13.000 I mean, obviously, it's only been around for six, seven months, and we're real confused.
00:19:19.000 In many cases, a lot, like for whatever reason, their immune system has not had as many prior experiences with coronaviruses.
00:19:26.000 So if your immune system has gotten a lot of colds and you fought them off, supposedly you're in a better position to deal with this than somebody who has not had that happen.
00:19:35.000 Germophobes are fucked.
00:19:36.000 Yeah.
00:19:36.000 Germophobes.
00:19:37.000 The fact that we were shaking hands and on and off planes, that might be good.
00:19:41.000 That might have strengthened our immune system.
00:19:42.000 Well, they were saying that about people in prison.
00:19:44.000 One of the reasons why the people in prison are doing so well with it, like when guys are in prison, you would say, oh, what a fucking terrible place for your immune system.
00:19:52.000 But was it Huberman?
00:19:54.000 Was it Andrew Huberman who was talking to us about this?
00:19:57.000 I think it was.
00:19:58.000 He was saying...
00:19:59.000 Might not have been him.
00:20:00.000 Too many guests.
00:20:01.000 They were talking about immune systems and that when you think of your immune system, you think, well, if you're healthy and calm and well slept and you're not stressed out, that's when your immune system is at its best.
00:20:12.000 Well, that's not really the case.
00:20:13.000 And those people that are in jail, stuffed in next to all these people, breathing in everybody's bacteria and all the viruses and shit that's in the air, No escape from each other.
00:20:22.000 No way to social distance.
00:20:23.000 Those people actually have pretty strong immune systems because of that.
00:20:25.000 They're doing good.
00:20:26.000 Because their immune system is in shape.
00:20:28.000 So the LA homeless population has got to be great.
00:20:30.000 Oh yeah.
00:20:31.000 They probably have a natural immunity.
00:20:33.000 You know they have typhus?
00:20:35.000 I don't know.
00:20:35.000 You know that?
00:20:36.000 I have no idea.
00:20:37.000 They found typhus.
00:20:38.000 Yeah.
00:20:39.000 It's a middle-aged disease.
00:20:42.000 It's come back because of the conditions, the urine, the feces.
00:20:45.000 Not a middle-aged, medieval.
00:20:47.000 I always fuck that up.
00:20:48.000 Every time I do that, I'm like, this time I'm going to get it right.
00:20:50.000 Nope, I always say middle-aged, not medieval.
00:20:51.000 But they're doing good with corona because they have a strong immune system, so why don't we open the comedy store up and just have the homeless be the servers?
00:20:57.000 Like, why can't we open up businesses in LA and just have the homeless who've strengthened their immune systems operate the businesses?
00:21:05.000 They don't show up for work.
00:21:07.000 Let them shoot the voice.
00:21:10.000 Let homeless people go in and direct the voice.
00:21:13.000 I don't think they don't show up a lot.
00:21:16.000 That's true.
00:21:16.000 They're very unreliable.
00:21:18.000 They're unreliable.
00:21:19.000 Maybe you should have like three homeless for each job.
00:21:22.000 Yeah.
00:21:22.000 Someone's coming in.
00:21:23.000 Becky's ready.
00:21:24.000 Becky's on standby.
00:21:25.000 Becky's over there shaking and scratching.
00:21:29.000 Here's the camera.
00:21:30.000 Yeah.
00:21:30.000 Pointed at how we meant that this is America's Got Talent.
00:21:33.000 There's 70,000 of them just in LA. It's crazy.
00:21:36.000 They don't even know really how many there are now because there were 70,000 of them before Corona.
00:21:40.000 Oh, there's going to be millions.
00:21:42.000 Imagine if there's a million homeless people.
00:21:43.000 There's going to be millions of homeless people.
00:21:45.000 It's going to look very soon like a, and it's already starting to get there, like a movie.
00:21:52.000 Like a post-apocalyptic movie where you drive down Melrose and everything's boarded up.
00:21:57.000 And you see a lot...
00:21:58.000 Like, it's gonna start looking really bad here.
00:22:02.000 It could look really bad here.
00:22:04.000 New York is a nightmare.
00:22:06.000 I've heard.
00:22:07.000 Like, New York, the crime is skyrocketing.
00:22:10.000 And, you know, there's just...
00:22:13.000 You know, the relationship between the police and the people is very fraught.
00:22:17.000 And it's very hard.
00:22:18.000 I mean, it's like, so the police like, fuck it, we don't want to do anything.
00:22:20.000 And you like, you understand a lot of they're just like, listen, we're gonna sit back.
00:22:24.000 And then now, a lot of areas are just being policed by criminal elements by gangs and stuff like that.
00:22:30.000 Because that's what happens in a power vacuum, you know, if you get rid of The cops, I'm not saying they shouldn't be reformed or they shouldn't have all these new regulations, but if you defund them or get rid of them, somebody steps into that vacuum and it's going to be usually a gang, the mafia,
00:22:46.000 crime syndicate, whatever.
00:22:48.000 Dude, de Blasio.
00:22:49.000 Not good.
00:22:49.000 If you think your mayor is bad.
00:22:52.000 De Blasio is a nightmare.
00:22:53.000 He's like, hold my beer.
00:22:56.000 He's bad.
00:22:57.000 He's the worst.
00:22:58.000 He's bad.
00:22:58.000 He eats pizza with a fork.
00:22:59.000 And what's great is that...
00:23:00.000 He does.
00:23:02.000 He does, yeah.
00:23:03.000 What's great is that everyone hates him, like the left hates him, for different reasons, and then the right hates him.
00:23:08.000 Even the Black Lives Matter people hate him.
00:23:10.000 They all hate him.
00:23:11.000 He's so pandering.
00:23:12.000 What is he doing?
00:23:12.000 Look at that one.
00:23:13.000 Oh, God.
00:23:13.000 Eating pizza with a fork.
00:23:14.000 He's disgusting.
00:23:15.000 What kind of a fucking human?
00:23:16.000 What is this, the mafia?
00:23:17.000 Who's he sitting with?
00:23:18.000 A bunch of old dead people.
00:23:19.000 Who is this, the mob?
00:23:20.000 Look how ridiculous this is.
00:23:21.000 Is the teacher's unit?
00:23:22.000 The one guy with the sleeves, the guy with the sleeve tattoos, he better not eat that pizza with a fork.
00:23:26.000 I will fucking find him.
00:23:28.000 Yeah.
00:23:28.000 I mean, de Blasio.
00:23:30.000 He's a fake human.
00:23:31.000 He's not a real human.
00:23:31.000 He's like a goofball.
00:23:33.000 Yeah.
00:23:33.000 And he gets up with his wife.
00:23:35.000 They did like a rally right after coronavirus.
00:23:37.000 And like she gets up and she goes, power to the people.
00:23:41.000 And then she thought like it was going to be like a 60s rally.
00:23:44.000 And then the crowd was just stared at her like, what the fuck?
00:23:47.000 We're going to die, lady.
00:23:48.000 Everyone's coughing.
00:23:49.000 Yeah, they thought it was going to be like they were going to start beating tambourines.
00:23:52.000 Like, power to the people.
00:23:54.000 Her and de Blasio think they're living some historic moment.
00:23:59.000 Well, they are.
00:24:00.000 It's just not what they think it is.
00:24:01.000 It's just not what they think it is.
00:24:02.000 They're in the wrong movie.
00:24:04.000 Yeah, it's rough, man.
00:24:05.000 Yeah, cities are in trouble.
00:24:07.000 Yeah.
00:24:07.000 Well, he literally said, you can only protest if it's a Black Lives Matter protest.
00:24:12.000 Yeah.
00:24:12.000 Listen, as much as I support the movement, that is not freedom of speech.
00:24:17.000 You can't do that.
00:24:19.000 No.
00:24:19.000 That's anti-First Amendment.
00:24:20.000 Yeah.
00:24:20.000 That is a big part of who we are.
00:24:22.000 You can't say you can only do one kind of protest.
00:24:26.000 Everybody's got to protest or nobody's got to protest.
00:24:28.000 Right.
00:24:28.000 Everyone's got to be allowed.
00:24:29.000 You got to allow the anti-mask people with Candace Owens singing songs with Sean Hannity.
00:24:35.000 And you need to let the Black Lives Matter people do it.
00:24:37.000 Everybody's got to be able to protest.
00:24:39.000 Yeah.
00:24:39.000 I mean, I rented a house in the desert, and it's 119 degrees every day.
00:24:42.000 So not only can people not protest, you can't leave your house without dying.
00:24:46.000 Like, if you leave your house, you get skin cancer.
00:24:48.000 Sauna life.
00:24:48.000 Yeah.
00:24:49.000 And they tried to do a protest.
00:24:50.000 I swear to God, it lasted three blocks.
00:24:52.000 They were banging a thing.
00:24:54.000 They were like, no justice.
00:24:57.000 They were like, no...
00:24:59.000 No, Pete.
00:25:00.000 Like, they had no idea.
00:25:01.000 And then they were sitting down.
00:25:02.000 You saw them, like, sitting down, eating ice.
00:25:04.000 I am 100% for police reform.
00:25:06.000 100%.
00:25:07.000 I'm 100%.
00:25:07.000 I 100% believe there's too much police brutality.
00:25:10.000 Too much.
00:25:10.000 I am also 100% in the belief that there's a lot of people that are doing this and following this movement because, like we were talking about before with actors, It is the trendy thing to do.
00:25:22.000 Social.
00:25:22.000 And then, also, what you're seeing in Portland and Seattle, you're seeing crazy white people trying to light government buildings on fire.
00:25:29.000 Well, they think if they bash the windows of Amazon, this is the beginning of the revolution.
00:25:34.000 Right.
00:25:35.000 It's all connected to police brutality.
00:25:37.000 It's crazy.
00:25:37.000 It is not connected at all to police.
00:25:38.000 It's just anarchy.
00:25:39.000 It's just chaos.
00:25:40.000 When you unleash that, like, in the beginning of this, like, listen, you burned down a target.
00:25:44.000 It was fine.
00:25:45.000 I even laughed.
00:25:46.000 I said, who gives a shit?
00:25:47.000 It's in Minneapolis.
00:25:48.000 Like, did this happen in Minneapolis?
00:25:49.000 So what?
00:25:50.000 A target gets it in Minneapolis.
00:25:51.000 The guy gets charged the next day.
00:25:53.000 It's fine.
00:25:53.000 But when you unleash total chaos, you know more about violence than anybody.
00:25:57.000 You can't control it.
00:25:58.000 You can't direct it to the targets that you think are right.
00:26:02.000 It's also intoxicating and fun.
00:26:04.000 All those people that are involved in it, wearing masks, showing up every day.
00:26:07.000 They're having a good time.
00:26:07.000 It gives their life meaning.
00:26:09.000 Right, it does.
00:26:10.000 They're trying to beat the man.
00:26:11.000 Right.
00:26:11.000 They're trying to break down the fucking fence they put around the federal building, and they're trying to light that bitch on fire using Bibles.
00:26:17.000 Right.
00:26:17.000 They're lighting Bibles on fire.
00:26:18.000 Jesus.
00:26:19.000 I mean, it's all chaos.
00:26:20.000 It's just insane.
00:26:21.000 And how about the mayor of Seattle?
00:26:22.000 It's like, maybe this is our summer of love.
00:26:25.000 Yeah, I've never been there.
00:26:26.000 I don't want to ever go.
00:26:28.000 The Pacific Northwest, I hate it.
00:26:31.000 I know you do.
00:26:32.000 I don't give a fuck about those people.
00:26:33.000 I don't care about those trees and the trails.
00:26:35.000 And they all look like vampires.
00:26:38.000 They're pale and gaunt freaks.
00:26:40.000 They're so weird.
00:26:41.000 Amway, that scam started up there.
00:26:43.000 Multi-level marketing started up there.
00:26:45.000 Yeah, they're all looking for something to believe in.
00:26:47.000 And those are problem areas.
00:26:49.000 Well, that's where Brett Weinstein was teaching at Evergreen, and that's where they came for him.
00:26:53.000 Yeah, they were patrolling the campus with bats.
00:26:55.000 Looking for him.
00:26:56.000 Jesus.
00:26:57.000 He's literally as progressive as a human can get.
00:26:59.000 Right.
00:27:00.000 He's also a nerd.
00:27:02.000 Super nice guy.
00:27:03.000 Yeah.
00:27:03.000 And they were coming for him.
00:27:06.000 I've never liked it.
00:27:07.000 There's something about the Pacific Northwest, I've just never connected with it.
00:27:11.000 I thought about living there once.
00:27:12.000 Yeah, but I mean, you love that stuff.
00:27:14.000 I don't give a shit about it.
00:27:16.000 It rains all the time.
00:27:16.000 I know, but that's why these people are out throwing Bibles at the Federal Building, is because it's raining all the time.
00:27:22.000 Well, I don't know what makes that place so progressive and so left-wing, but the thing is that you saw hints of this many years ago where Antifa would stop traffic.
00:27:32.000 They were doing these things.
00:27:33.000 And they would get people to say Black Lives Matter.
00:27:36.000 It's like, what's the point of that?
00:27:37.000 This was before that.
00:27:37.000 They weren't connected with Black Lives Matter.
00:27:40.000 Before the coronavirus thing, before George Floyd, the Antifa people, it was all about right-wing people.
00:27:46.000 It was all about combating right-wing folks.
00:27:49.000 Right.
00:27:49.000 Like the Proud Boys.
00:27:50.000 They would have those skirmishes.
00:27:51.000 Exactly.
00:27:51.000 Right.
00:27:52.000 Well, that's where the Proud Boys came from.
00:27:53.000 Right.
00:27:54.000 They came from Gavin- Protecting right-wing speakers.
00:27:56.000 Exactly.
00:27:57.000 They wanted someone to fight back against Antifa who were shutting down people who were speaking at colleges who were right-wing.
00:28:04.000 People like Milo or anybody else.
00:28:06.000 Ann Coulter or whatever.
00:28:06.000 Yeah, those kind of people.
00:28:07.000 So that's where it all came from in the first place.
00:28:09.000 But when you would go to Seattle, they were letting these fucking people direct traffic.
00:28:14.000 Or was it Portland?
00:28:15.000 Might have been Portland.
00:28:15.000 Portland.
00:28:16.000 They were letting these fucking people direct.
00:28:18.000 They were telling people, you can't go down this road.
00:28:20.000 Yeah.
00:28:20.000 And so this old man was like, I'm going.
00:28:22.000 And they started chasing him and they kicked his ass.
00:28:25.000 They're beating on his fucking car.
00:28:26.000 Yeah.
00:28:26.000 I don't know why people on Twitter defend that.
00:28:29.000 And I don't know why a lot of celebrities defend it.
00:28:32.000 And I don't understand why a lot of mainstream Democrats don't just call that out for what it is.
00:28:37.000 I've never once seen a mainstream Republican ever.
00:28:41.000 I mean...
00:28:42.000 Defend the Proud Boys or that was certainly not their hill to die on.
00:28:47.000 If a mainstream Republican defended them, it was a huge news story.
00:28:51.000 Usually, I don't know why.
00:28:53.000 I think the big problem is things are happening.
00:28:56.000 You see them with your own eyes and then people tell you that they're not happening.
00:29:00.000 They're like, no, that protest is peaceful.
00:29:01.000 You're like, I saw them light a guy on fire and use him as a battering ram to get into Macy's.
00:29:06.000 They're like, well, you know, he gave them a look.
00:29:08.000 There's always a qualifier.
00:29:10.000 There's always this weird qualifier.
00:29:12.000 They're like, well, here's what happened.
00:29:14.000 You're like, they were beating a child.
00:29:15.000 They're like, let me explain what happened.
00:29:17.000 They were gathered together.
00:29:19.000 They had burning Bibles, bows and arrows, bike locks and chains.
00:29:22.000 That child crossed the street.
00:29:24.000 That child said, my dad's a cop.
00:29:26.000 You see the child starting?
00:29:28.000 You're like, no.
00:29:29.000 There's always a weird like, but they did it first.
00:29:33.000 They're the thugs of the left wing.
00:29:35.000 They're doing the dirty work that the left-wing wants to get done.
00:29:38.000 They're like theater kids.
00:29:39.000 They're like people that failed at stand-up comedy in theater and they moved back to Portland from LA and now they're like, let's burn it all down.
00:29:45.000 I didn't get a Comedy Central half hour.
00:29:47.000 It's truly what it is.
00:29:49.000 You ever see the ones that are practicing self-defense?
00:29:52.000 No.
00:29:53.000 They train.
00:29:53.000 They actually train.
00:29:55.000 These Antifa people were meeting in the park and they were getting raided for skirmishes with the right-wing people.
00:30:00.000 This is all pre-COVID when this was funny.
00:30:02.000 Right, right, right.
00:30:04.000 Because pre-COVID this was funny.
00:30:05.000 When it stopped being funny was, how do you pronounce his last name?
00:30:08.000 Go, Andy Ngo.
00:30:09.000 Andy Ngo.
00:30:09.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:30:10.000 When Andy Ngo got beat up and they milkshaked him and people were mocking him.
00:30:13.000 I'm like, hey, why do you think it's okay to beat this guy up?
00:30:17.000 Why do you think it's okay to steal this guy's camera?
00:30:19.000 Yeah, what is that?
00:30:20.000 No one is saying this is wrong?
00:30:21.000 Yeah.
00:30:22.000 Then I started to say, okay, this is going to be a real problem.
00:30:24.000 And then the economy got shut down and you're like, oh, this will only make this bigger.
00:30:29.000 Yeah, way bigger.
00:30:30.000 Yeah, this will only fuel the fire.
00:30:31.000 But again, it's like these people who go there, whether they're trying to light the federal building on fire or direct traffic, they have a purpose now.
00:30:39.000 They have a thing, and they have a cause.
00:30:41.000 Right.
00:30:42.000 Like when they took over that six-block section of Portland, or Seattle, rather.
00:30:47.000 Yeah, Chaz.
00:30:47.000 Chaz, yeah.
00:30:48.000 What was it?
00:30:49.000 Chow?
00:30:50.000 What was it called again?
00:30:51.000 It was Chaz.
00:30:52.000 Or Chop?
00:30:52.000 Chop.
00:30:53.000 It became Chop, but it started as Chaz.
00:30:56.000 But young countries often have, you know, hiccups as they develop.
00:31:01.000 I was going to have that guy on my show, the guy Raz.
00:31:03.000 Yeah, I was too.
00:31:04.000 Then he got caught with a gun.
00:31:05.000 I know.
00:31:06.000 He was handing an AK to someone or whatever it was.
00:31:08.000 Yeah, I still would have had him, but we couldn't get a Zoom link working.
00:31:11.000 I was going to have him here in person.
00:31:12.000 Really?
00:31:13.000 Yeah.
00:31:13.000 Interesting.
00:31:14.000 That would have been fun.
00:31:15.000 Maybe.
00:31:15.000 Yeah.
00:31:17.000 I was like, listen, man, I support you doing your thing, but you can't bring it out a gun.
00:31:23.000 And I didn't even know what the thing is.
00:31:25.000 Well, then they shot two people there.
00:31:26.000 Well, I don't know.
00:31:27.000 He didn't shoot two people.
00:31:28.000 Well, he didn't, but someone definitely did.
00:31:29.000 The other thing they were doing that was crazy was they basically became a really shittily run country.
00:31:35.000 They put up borders almost immediately.
00:31:38.000 Barriers.
00:31:39.000 They want borders.
00:31:40.000 When people were doing things they didn't want them to do, they were the worst case of police brutality.
00:31:43.000 They just beat the fuck out of people.
00:31:44.000 They just beat people out.
00:31:45.000 So if you were trying to film them doing something they didn't want you to film, they'd just kick your ass.
00:31:49.000 Well, this is just like if you believe in something really fervently, it's always the ends justify the means.
00:31:56.000 However you get there, it doesn't matter.
00:31:58.000 Anything's justified in the pursuit of this utopia that you think you're going to erect in downtown Seattle.
00:32:05.000 Well, it's also, you're doing exactly what you think shouldn't have been done to America.
00:32:09.000 You're occupying land.
00:32:11.000 You're taking over existing structures.
00:32:13.000 You're kicking out the indigenous people of Seattle.
00:32:16.000 Yeah.
00:32:16.000 I think, you know, the shitty thing is, like, electoral politics isn't perfect, but that's what you have to do.
00:32:22.000 Like, look at Cortez.
00:32:23.000 She got elected, you know?
00:32:26.000 The people that believe the things you believe can get elected.
00:32:29.000 They have to work within the system because all the violence that chaos will do will give the government a reason to even clamp down more.
00:32:36.000 Now they've got people throwing people in advance in Portland, the DHS, because again, you're not going to overthrow the government.
00:32:42.000 You're not going to overthrow the military.
00:32:43.000 It's not the way it's going to work.
00:32:44.000 They catch you breaking public property.
00:32:47.000 It's just going to be an excuse for them to clamp down more and we're going to be in more of a police state than we were.
00:32:53.000 Yeah, the idea that when they did that, that somehow or another incited the violence to get worse.
00:32:58.000 I don't know if that's true.
00:33:00.000 No, it was chaos every night for 50 days.
00:33:03.000 I'm not for the unmarked vans.
00:33:05.000 I think that's a bad...
00:33:06.000 I think all of those things...
00:33:08.000 End up being – because look at what happened after 9-11.
00:33:12.000 They said we're going to do this, this, and this, and then all of a sudden nobody got any rights back, by the way.
00:33:17.000 Your emails are still being read.
00:33:19.000 You have no privacy.
00:33:20.000 All of that's still there.
00:33:21.000 So if we just establish a precedent of like, yeah, some people need to get thrown in a van, and we'll explain why that is.
00:33:28.000 Yeah.
00:33:29.000 That becomes a major problem going forward.
00:33:32.000 Did you see when they got thrown into vans, how excited everybody else was?
00:33:34.000 What's your name?
00:33:35.000 What's your name?
00:33:36.000 We'll get you out, friend!
00:33:37.000 Right, yeah.
00:33:37.000 It's like, you guys are all like Luke Skywalker.
00:33:40.000 This is what happens when you shut a country down for three months.
00:33:44.000 This is the only fun left.
00:33:45.000 Nothing's open anymore.
00:33:47.000 The only fun thing left to do is to overthrow the government and get thrown in a van.
00:33:52.000 This is summer vacation to people.
00:33:55.000 You know they used to have those dumb escape rooms that people used to do?
00:33:58.000 I love escape rooms.
00:33:59.000 You shut the fuck up.
00:34:00.000 They're stupid.
00:34:01.000 I love them.
00:34:01.000 But this is a real one.
00:34:03.000 This is a fun real one now.
00:34:05.000 It is a fun real one.
00:34:06.000 How fun is that?
00:34:06.000 How do you light the federal building on fire?
00:34:08.000 Now it's a real one.
00:34:09.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:34:10.000 It's interesting, man.
00:34:12.000 And I wonder how these people are going to transition into regular grown-up life after life as an anarchist.
00:34:16.000 Well, I think that ship has sailed, Joe.
00:34:19.000 I think regular grown-up life, the ship is on both sides.
00:34:22.000 The people that were in Charlottesville marching around like, we're going to have a white country.
00:34:27.000 I mean, these people also- They will not replace us.
00:34:30.000 Yeah, Jews will not replace us.
00:34:32.000 It's like those people are, as well, you'll never please the far left and the far right.
00:34:37.000 The people that are really on the fringes, you're never going to make them happy.
00:34:43.000 Like Kamala Harris, by the way, is a fine VP choice.
00:34:47.000 Yes, we're all going to get put in jail.
00:34:49.000 Yes, she's going to put you in jail.
00:34:51.000 But guess what?
00:34:52.000 Who is he going to pick?
00:34:54.000 Elizabeth Warren, who lied about being a Native American.
00:34:58.000 Kamala's good because the people in the middle don't care that she's a cop.
00:35:02.000 No one gives a shit.
00:35:03.000 No one cares.
00:35:04.000 You might care that she locked up people, but the Republican convention is going to be very tough to really get people mad at Kamala Harris.
00:35:10.000 They're going to be like, fuck Kamala.
00:35:12.000 Everyone's going to go, yeah, they're going to go, she's a cop and she locked up minorities.
00:35:15.000 Republicans go...
00:35:21.000 Is this a real problem?
00:35:23.000 What do you think?
00:35:26.000 You think she's the worst?
00:35:27.000 I don't think she's the worst, but I think it's very interesting.
00:35:31.000 Well, somebody wrote on Twitter that the left is very much against sexism and racism.
00:35:39.000 Yet they elected someone or they chose someone to be a VP based entirely on their sex and their race.
00:35:45.000 Right.
00:35:45.000 But we knew that was going to happen.
00:35:47.000 We knew that was going to happen.
00:35:48.000 This is why all these people on Twitter and guys that I really like.
00:35:51.000 I really love Kyle Kuklinski and those people.
00:35:53.000 But they were so mad about it.
00:35:54.000 I'm like, guys, didn't you see it was going to happen?
00:35:56.000 Didn't you...
00:35:57.000 Didn't you, like, it's the most predictable choice in history.
00:36:01.000 I was thinking if they went nuclear, Michelle Obama.
00:36:04.000 That would have been wild, right?
00:36:05.000 She would have won.
00:36:05.000 She would have won.
00:36:06.000 They would have won.
00:36:07.000 And Cuomo from New York, who I call Meatball, the governor of New York.
00:36:11.000 Meatball and Michelle Obama win.
00:36:13.000 Did you see the latest Cuomo thing?
00:36:14.000 No, what's he doing now?
00:36:16.000 Kyle Kalinske sent me this.
00:36:18.000 He's out of control over there.
00:36:19.000 His brother pretended to have coronavirus, by the way.
00:36:22.000 They pretended?
00:36:23.000 Well, his brother Chris Cuomo said he beat coronavirus by doing chest exercises.
00:36:27.000 What?
00:36:27.000 Swear to God.
00:36:28.000 There's a YouTube video where Chris Cuomo's going, you know, this virus gets in your body and it wants to stay there.
00:36:32.000 But you know what?
00:36:33.000 You just start stretching your chest, doing this, and you get rid of it.
00:36:36.000 That's literally.
00:36:37.000 I mean, he's never forget.
00:36:38.000 Lie or lie.
00:36:38.000 Is that true?
00:36:39.000 Yes, he's a liar.
00:36:40.000 He said you gotta stretch your chest?
00:36:41.000 Yes.
00:36:42.000 If you can find it, Jamie, it's real.
00:36:43.000 And he said he cured himself.
00:36:45.000 He cured himself by doing chest exercises and stretching his lungs out.
00:36:49.000 Well, the worst part was when he pretended to come out of the basement for the first time when he had already been in a fucking fight with some guy who was riding a bike.
00:36:57.000 They're pathological liars, both of them.
00:36:59.000 I don't think that's what the case is.
00:37:01.000 Okay.
00:37:02.000 From a person who's worked in show business for a long time, I think he had a producer at CNN, and they had this shot scheduled.
00:37:09.000 We're going to film you coming out of the basement.
00:37:11.000 It's going to be amazing.
00:37:12.000 You're going to embrace your family for the first time in two weeks.
00:37:15.000 Okay, did the producer make him pretend to have coronavirus?
00:37:18.000 Cuomo's protecting his Wall Street donors from Democratic tax bills.
00:37:22.000 So this is, but the tweet I sent you, Jamie.
00:37:26.000 I didn't send you the tweet?
00:37:28.000 Here it is.
00:37:29.000 New disclosure records show Andrew Cuomo's largest hedge fund donor just funneled huge money to the governor precisely the moment Cuomo has been blocking Democratic legislators' bills to reinstate New York's financial transactions tax.
00:37:45.000 That's crazy.
00:37:48.000 That is crazy.
00:37:49.000 It's nuts.
00:37:50.000 If that's the case, if he knew that tax was coming, and he blocked it just so that he could get paid, I don't know enough about financing.
00:38:00.000 I don't know either.
00:38:01.000 You used to sell houses.
00:38:03.000 Tell me.
00:38:03.000 I was a subprime mortgage guy.
00:38:05.000 I know these things.
00:38:07.000 You're my guy I go to.
00:38:08.000 Yeah.
00:38:09.000 Well, good.
00:38:10.000 I mean, it's very possible that he did block it so he could get paid.
00:38:15.000 I mean, these people give themselves raises constantly, no matter what circumstances are.
00:38:18.000 No matter what shortfall the city government's in, these people constantly give themselves raises.
00:38:22.000 And Cuomo's got to play an interesting game because Wall Street money is how New York is even alive.
00:38:27.000 If enough Wall Street people leave, they're fucked.
00:38:29.000 Well, they're fucked right now.
00:38:30.000 They're fucked right now.
00:38:31.000 50% of the taxes in New York are paid by the rich.
00:38:34.000 Right, and they're leaving.
00:38:35.000 It's like 1% of the people pay 50% of the taxes.
00:38:37.000 Yeah, a lot of them went to the Hamptons, a lot of them got out of the city, and a lot of them are leaving the city.
00:38:41.000 Forever.
00:38:41.000 Right.
00:38:42.000 So, you know, you can shit on the rich, blah, blah, blah.
00:38:45.000 I think a lot of them should, you know, a lot of them get...
00:38:49.000 Out of paying taxes by routing their money offshore, and they do a lot of things they shouldn't do.
00:38:54.000 But that tax base is essential for that city.
00:38:58.000 100%.
00:38:58.000 100%.
00:38:59.000 And this is where they're fucked.
00:39:01.000 And also foreign criminals.
00:39:02.000 As sad as it is, third world dictators, Chinese amusement park tycoons, Russian oligarchs, and assorted murderers...
00:39:11.000 You need their money!
00:39:12.000 Yeah, otherwise how are you going to sell stock?
00:39:14.000 That's the reality.
00:39:15.000 They have to come in and launder their money through New York real estate.
00:39:19.000 They got to come in and buy 10 apartments they don't use, and then their daughter goes to NYU. I mean, otherwise that whole city is going to fall apart.
00:39:26.000 It's not right or wrong, good or bad.
00:39:28.000 It's just what's going to happen.
00:39:29.000 It's just what it is.
00:39:30.000 Did you see Cuomo trying to bring the rich people back?
00:39:32.000 He's like, come on over, I'll cook.
00:39:34.000 Yeah, I'll cook.
00:39:35.000 He's a goon, that guy.
00:39:36.000 How many people are you cooking for, bro?
00:39:38.000 He's an idiot.
00:39:38.000 This is that folksy horse shit that they do, like, I'm making me bowl for you.
00:39:42.000 I'll cook for you.
00:39:43.000 Come on over.
00:39:44.000 How about not letting the city get destroyed?
00:39:47.000 How about not sending sick, old people to the nursing home where they can infect everybody else?
00:39:51.000 Well, that I was for.
00:39:52.000 I think a good brush fire through the nursing homes is good, to be honest with you.
00:39:58.000 Oh, God.
00:39:59.000 I mean, my mother's in a nursing home.
00:40:00.000 Her roommate had COVID for a month.
00:40:04.000 My mother never got it.
00:40:05.000 Every day they would go in and they were like, will you?
00:40:07.000 My mother's an annoying woman, loud, looks like me.
00:40:10.000 Every day they walked in, they're like, will you die?
00:40:12.000 She's like, I feel great.
00:40:14.000 So we're all hoping second wave.
00:40:16.000 But it's like...
00:40:20.000 You know, she won't die.
00:40:22.000 The woman's 300 pounds.
00:40:23.000 She won't die.
00:40:24.000 She won't die.
00:40:25.000 What is she eating?
00:40:27.000 Everything.
00:40:27.000 Probably her roommate who died of COVID. She's probably eating her.
00:40:31.000 But the woman won't die.
00:40:33.000 She's indefatigable.
00:40:34.000 That's a great word.
00:40:36.000 Yeah.
00:40:36.000 I whip it out here.
00:40:38.000 I don't know if I can say it right.
00:40:40.000 I don't think I said it right.
00:40:41.000 I couldn't say medieval.
00:40:42.000 Here it is.
00:40:43.000 This is how he beat Corona.
00:40:45.000 I don't think that.
00:40:46.000 I think he's just talking about the tightness in his chest.
00:40:48.000 No, no, no.
00:40:49.000 Stop defending him.
00:40:52.000 I have to defend all guineas.
00:40:53.000 This is insane.
00:40:54.000 Because I have too much of that in me.
00:40:56.000 This is the vaccine for coronavirus, by the way, going like this.
00:40:59.000 Stretching.
00:41:00.000 He's stretching.
00:41:00.000 Yeah, he's stretching.
00:41:01.000 I like how the stairs are behind him.
00:41:03.000 Yeah, it's all horseshit.
00:41:05.000 He looks fine.
00:41:06.000 It's probably a set.
00:41:06.000 Yeah, it's probably a set.
00:41:07.000 Probably a green screen.
00:41:07.000 He's not sick.
00:41:08.000 He's like, he goes, you know, he goes, this virus gets in you and wants to kill you.
00:41:11.000 But he goes, you know what I do?
00:41:13.000 He goes, I just stretch the lungs, stretch the lungs.
00:41:16.000 And it's like, okay, so we shut down the economy for three months for a virus where you can just...
00:41:21.000 Stretch your lungs up.
00:41:22.000 You can stretch the lungs and then that's it.
00:41:24.000 Something's off.
00:41:24.000 Well, this virus is fucked up because if you talk to some people, it's nothing.
00:41:29.000 And I know people that have gotten it, they've got a headache.
00:41:31.000 And they're fucked.
00:41:32.000 And then other people that have gotten it and they're fucked still.
00:41:34.000 Right.
00:41:35.000 I think Michael Yeo is still having a problem with fatigue.
00:41:37.000 My ex-manager, his wife got it.
00:41:41.000 She still can't smell.
00:41:43.000 Whoa, how long ago?
00:41:44.000 Three months.
00:41:45.000 She still can smell a few things.
00:41:47.000 Jesus.
00:41:48.000 I know.
00:41:49.000 Is she healthy?
00:41:50.000 Yeah, she's a thin, you know, middle-aged woman.
00:41:54.000 Hmm.
00:41:55.000 Yeah, it's weird, and they're also saying that some large number of people that get it, they have heart damage.
00:42:02.000 So after it's over, they show, like that baseball player, there's a professional baseball player that has to sit out the rest of the season because he got checked out.
00:42:10.000 I mean, I think he's 29 years old or something like that, and they found out that he has some inflammation in his heart.
00:42:16.000 Nobody knows why any of this is happening.
00:42:19.000 Well, I take it back to Brett Weinstein again, because Brett, who's a biologist, was saying that this disease has all the markers of a disease that's been manipulated for research.
00:42:28.000 Right.
00:42:29.000 Probably.
00:42:29.000 That's why it's so infectious.
00:42:32.000 Now, manipulated for research, like manipulated so that they can research it or manipulated as like, how can we make something dangerous that might be a weapon?
00:42:38.000 No, they manipulate it so that they can do research on it, so they can find out what kind of cures they can create for coronavirus.
00:42:44.000 Interesting.
00:42:45.000 The lab that they did research at was in Wuhan, and it's a level four lab.
00:42:50.000 By a research facility.
00:42:51.000 And they had been cited in 2018 for safety violations.
00:42:54.000 They're getting real sloppy over there, because when you're working under communism, you don't have a lot of incentives.
00:42:58.000 Right, right.
00:42:58.000 You're not making a lot of money.
00:43:01.000 So it's very possible that this is a genetically modified virus and maybe that's why it has all of these different effects on people.
00:43:11.000 Exactly.
00:43:12.000 Exactly.
00:43:12.000 And it's probably morphing.
00:43:14.000 Like they say the one in India is so different that if we come up with a vaccine for the American version, it's not going to work on the Indian version.
00:43:21.000 Is this just the rest of the history now?
00:43:23.000 It's just viruses and pandemics?
00:43:26.000 I mean, this seems to be...
00:43:28.000 Because all the conditions for this are going to still be there.
00:43:35.000 There's still going to be these wet markets.
00:43:37.000 There'll still be a lot of unsafe handling of produce.
00:43:42.000 And not only produce, but different types of animals.
00:43:46.000 Right.
00:43:47.000 So this may not be the end of this.
00:43:49.000 This may be the beginning of an era of just different types of pandemics and viruses.
00:43:53.000 Well, they've been warning us about this for a while.
00:43:55.000 For a while, yeah.
00:43:55.000 Bill Gates had that TED speech in 2015. Said it's coming.
00:43:59.000 Yeah, and now he's the devil.
00:44:00.000 Now everybody's like, Bill Gates wants to give you a microchip.
00:44:02.000 Well, I don't think he's the devil.
00:44:03.000 I just think people get weirdly uncomfortable when it's like billionaires want to do it.
00:44:06.000 Like Bill Gates was considering once shooting a missile of dust at the sun to help climate change.
00:44:12.000 This is a fact.
00:44:13.000 What?
00:44:14.000 Yes.
00:44:15.000 So he was considering this, and then...
00:44:17.000 Wait a minute.
00:44:17.000 Yeah.
00:44:18.000 Bill Gates...
00:44:18.000 Where'd you read this?
00:44:19.000 What kind of dust?
00:44:20.000 Do you know how big the sun is?
00:44:22.000 Yeah, but Bill Gates was considering shooting a missile full of dust at the sun.
00:44:26.000 So it's like, now obviously people said to him, hey, not a good idea, and he relented, but when you have these Batman...
00:44:33.000 Villain billionaires.
00:44:34.000 Not that they're evil, but that they have a lot of money.
00:44:36.000 They can do whatever they want.
00:44:37.000 People get uncomfortable with just one guy saying this is the way it is and this is what you need.
00:44:44.000 People just feel uncomfortable with that.
00:44:45.000 You find that?
00:44:45.000 Is that real?
00:44:46.000 That's real, Joe!
00:44:47.000 Could dimming the sun save the earth?
00:44:49.000 Bill Gates wants to spray millions of tons of dust into the stratosphere.
00:44:52.000 Okay, that's different.
00:44:52.000 To stop global warming.
00:44:53.000 But critics fear it could drivel calamity.
00:44:55.000 Yeah, that's not at the sun.
00:44:57.000 What that is is suspending particles in the atmosphere that are going to act as like clouds.
00:45:01.000 Understood, but the reality is people get a They get a little uncomfortable when a billionaire from a lair has decided to start shooting dust into the atmosphere.
00:45:11.000 And, you know, is there any democratic...
00:45:16.000 Process here where anybody will ever have any say in anything ever again, or are we just going to listen to Bezos and him?
00:45:23.000 They can do whatever they want.
00:45:24.000 Well, it's hard to say because when you're that rich, we listen anyway because we figure Bezos has got 200 billion dollars or something.
00:45:31.000 He must know something that we don't know.
00:45:33.000 We assume he's smarter than us.
00:45:37.000 Also, they have a lot of money.
00:45:38.000 I don't even think they want more money.
00:45:39.000 I think a lot of them just have...
00:45:40.000 Oh, they want more money.
00:45:41.000 Well, some of them do, but they just have designs in the way they want the world to look.
00:45:46.000 They have an ideology.
00:45:47.000 I trust Bezos more than I trust Bill because Bezos doesn't wear a uniform.
00:45:51.000 Bill Gates wears that Mr. Rogers uniform?
00:45:53.000 Yeah.
00:45:54.000 I don't trust it.
00:45:55.000 I trust Warren Buffet because I feel like he's in Omaha just eating eggs.
00:46:01.000 He lives in the same fucking house that he bought in like 1980. That's a scam though.
00:46:04.000 He does that so guys like us will be like, What a down-to-earth guy.
00:46:08.000 $80 billion lives in a $400,000 house?
00:46:11.000 Something's wrong.
00:46:11.000 That makes me more suspicious than I would be if he had a man.
00:46:14.000 He should have a big mansion.
00:46:15.000 Bill Gates.
00:46:16.000 Well, that's not even his regular outfit.
00:46:18.000 That's the regular outfit.
00:46:20.000 He's a little bit of a creep.
00:46:21.000 What do you do when it's 100 degrees, Bill?
00:46:23.000 What do you wear then?
00:46:24.000 Do you wear the same sweater with the shirt?
00:46:26.000 Look, he's got that fucking outfit.
00:46:27.000 He loves it.
00:46:28.000 That's the tech outfit, man.
00:46:30.000 That's the Silicon Valley.
00:46:32.000 People just get very nervous with Silicon Valley billionaires.
00:46:35.000 Well, it's an incredible amount of money and it's an incredible amount of influence.
00:46:38.000 People are really worried about Mark Zuckerberg.
00:46:41.000 Yeah, these guys are the new Rockefeller, Carnegie.
00:46:43.000 And he's fucking really young.
00:46:45.000 He's really young.
00:46:46.000 By the way, speaks perfect Mandarin.
00:46:48.000 Well, he's got a girl who's Chinese, right?
00:46:50.000 He's married.
00:46:51.000 Jesus Christ.
00:46:52.000 I don't know what he's doing.
00:46:53.000 I'm not invited to his home.
00:46:54.000 You're not?
00:46:55.000 I'll get you in.
00:46:56.000 I'd love to go.
00:46:57.000 All you have to do is get your Facebook page, over 700,000 followers.
00:47:00.000 I'd love to go.
00:47:00.000 I'd get banned from Facebook within an hour of being there.
00:47:03.000 I'd be taken away.
00:47:05.000 I'd just go up to him and go, can you get rid of my Aunt Kathleen, please?
00:47:08.000 There's a crazy video of him in China, and he's on a television show, and he starts speaking in Mandarin, and they go crazy.
00:47:15.000 They can't believe he can do it, and they're clapping and cheering.
00:47:17.000 Interesting.
00:47:18.000 Well, it takes very little to impress them, huh?
00:47:20.000 He's just a white guy.
00:47:21.000 Here's the guy from Facebook speaking perfect Mandarin.
00:47:24.000 Wow.
00:47:24.000 But he's ready.
00:47:25.000 That's comforting, by the way.
00:47:27.000 He's going to bring them all in.
00:47:28.000 The head of Facebook is yucking it up with, you know, maybe our biggest enemy.
00:47:32.000 That's nice.
00:47:33.000 He's going to be super excited about New World Order.
00:47:35.000 Give me some volume on this.
00:47:44.000 Yeah, what he's saying is we will destroy America.
00:47:46.000 The translation is America will be a prison.
00:47:49.000 We will send your government to rule our land.
00:47:52.000 This is what happens when you're like a genius and you don't get laid in college and you just say, you know what?
00:47:57.000 I'm just going to take over the war.
00:47:58.000 This is like Pinky and the Brain, but the real thing.
00:48:00.000 Well, he's also a guy who was friends with the people who put together Facebook.
00:48:06.000 Yeah, that's a great movie.
00:48:07.000 Social Network.
00:48:07.000 I didn't see the movie, but I read an article about the actual real story.
00:48:11.000 The actual real story is kind of fucked up.
00:48:13.000 Yeah, he kind of...
00:48:14.000 Well, there were those Winklevoss twins and they had this Harvard dating app or something and then Zuckerberg came in.
00:48:20.000 I think Zuckerberg had more of a vision of what he wanted it to be, but it was certainly sketch.
00:48:25.000 It's a little sketchy, the way that happened.
00:48:28.000 But the fact that they're trying to do money now, they're trying to do Facebook Bitcoin, like a cryptocurrency.
00:48:32.000 Oh yeah, it'll never end.
00:48:35.000 It'll never end.
00:48:36.000 It'll be Facebook vaccine.
00:48:38.000 It'll be Facebook.
00:48:39.000 I mean, it just won't end.
00:48:42.000 I mean, I don't know how it's still relevant.
00:48:44.000 When you go on Facebook now, it's just still crazy people screaming.
00:48:48.000 And they've still kept them all on there.
00:48:50.000 They've kept them on there.
00:48:52.000 Zuckerberg's figured out a way to keep the boomers on Facebook.
00:48:54.000 Just sharing recipes and complaining about...
00:48:58.000 QAnon?
00:48:59.000 Yeah, they're just talking about QAnon.
00:49:00.000 My aunt's like, save the children and here's a recipe for banana bread.
00:49:05.000 My aunt's like, there's tunnel under Central Park, and I'm making a banana cream pie later.
00:49:09.000 So if you want the recipe, I mean, literally, it's recipes and Q drops.
00:49:13.000 That's my aunt's face.
00:49:13.000 Q drops?
00:49:14.000 I mean, her head is melted.
00:49:16.000 I've talked to multiple people that really, truly believe in the QAnon stuff.
00:49:20.000 Well, some of it, listen, some of it, you've got to give them the benefit of the doubt.
00:49:24.000 It's like, I don't even blame the QAnon people as much because, like...
00:49:28.000 If you were ignorant of everything and you never thought anything was conspiratorial and then Epstein and all this stuff happened, your mind would melt.
00:49:35.000 Oh, yeah.
00:49:35.000 And that's what happened.
00:49:36.000 They just...
00:49:37.000 I've been listening and following weird shit.
00:49:39.000 I mean, I remember when 9-11 was a big thing.
00:49:41.000 Now nobody even cared.
00:49:42.000 Like, you bring that up, people roll their eyes.
00:49:44.000 I remember, like, news change and all those stuff.
00:49:45.000 That was a huge thing.
00:49:46.000 And everyone was like, we're going to get the answers.
00:49:47.000 And then people just stop caring.
00:49:49.000 And then you move on to this.
00:49:51.000 And then in five years, QAnon, people will be like, they'll stop caring.
00:49:54.000 And then it'll be another thing.
00:49:55.000 And eventually, you just have to kind of check out because it gets boring.
00:49:59.000 Well, you've got to wonder.
00:50:01.000 Disinformation campaigns have existed forever where they take legitimate information and then they lump it in with nuts.
00:50:06.000 Crazy shit.
00:50:08.000 Crazy people and crazy shit.
00:50:09.000 And then they put it out there because it taints all the legitimate information as well.
00:50:13.000 100%.
00:50:14.000 You know, there's a great book, Behold the Pale Horse.
00:50:16.000 You ever read that book?
00:50:17.000 Yeah, William Cooper or something?
00:50:18.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:50:19.000 You read some of it and you go, oh, this makes sense.
00:50:21.000 And then you go, what?
00:50:22.000 A fucking alien base on the moon?
00:50:23.000 Like, what's going on?
00:50:24.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:24.000 And then some of it just goes left.
00:50:26.000 Gets really crazy.
00:50:27.000 Yes, Patrice O'Neill had a great point where he's like, people will be, they'll say two things that make a lot of sense and then they'll put marbles up their ass.
00:50:37.000 That's the way he said it.
00:50:38.000 But it was true, and he said it on O&A. But eventually, just for your own mental health, you got to check out.
00:50:44.000 You got to just go, you know what?
00:50:46.000 There's more to life than politics, and there's just more to life than hunting this conspiracy forever, because none of what you think is going to happen is going to happen.
00:50:56.000 I think that's part of what you just nailed it, though.
00:50:58.000 There's more to life, but there's not for some people.
00:51:00.000 Yeah.
00:51:00.000 Some people, if they put on a fucking MAGA hat, and they have the fucking liberals with a line through it, and they go out there, and they fucking, yeah!
00:51:10.000 That's it.
00:51:11.000 And they get to the rally, yeah!
00:51:12.000 I was out there in the desert.
00:51:14.000 They had all these women, and they're in, you know, Mercedes, like, beautiful day, not as hot as it usually is.
00:51:19.000 Women in, like, top-down Mercedes.
00:51:21.000 You'd think, like, on a day like that, you'd just go out and take a drive, put an album on, go take a drive up the mountains.
00:51:26.000 It's beautiful.
00:51:27.000 Yeah.
00:51:27.000 Instead, they had these pink Women for Trump flags, and they all met on a corner, and they're all waving their flags, and it's like golf people.
00:51:35.000 It's like upper middle class golf people, and this is their sports.
00:51:41.000 It was like high school spirit night.
00:51:43.000 I wish her well.
00:51:44.000 Yeah.
00:51:46.000 Yeah, that's what it is.
00:51:48.000 And it's just like, again, thank God I found comedy.
00:51:52.000 Thank God I have something I like to do.
00:51:54.000 Because maybe I'd be somewhere with a flag, waving a flag, running around.
00:51:58.000 That's what it is, right?
00:51:59.000 People need things to do.
00:52:00.000 Nobody has hobbies.
00:52:02.000 Not only does nobody have hobbies, but right now no one has a job.
00:52:05.000 That's a problem.
00:52:06.000 So there's like no money coming in, you're desperate, you're scared, you're blaming other people, everybody else, you don't know who the fuck is to blame.
00:52:13.000 You have no idea what's going on.
00:52:14.000 And then there's a disease that might kill you.
00:52:17.000 Yeah, so that you're anxious, you're depressed, your social circle's been cut dramatically.
00:52:23.000 Dramatically.
00:52:23.000 And now the only thing you could do is kind of go online for 19 hours a day and get radicalized in whatever direction.
00:52:30.000 That's the thing that bothers me too, about like whenever people talk about whether it's conspiracy theorists or whatever, the one thing that drives me nuts is that people say we have to stop these conspir- like when all these COVID conspiracies were going around, Well,
00:52:46.000 that's a different one, right?
00:52:46.000 Because I guess some of them could be actually responsible for people making poor choices.
00:52:52.000 None of those people were going to make good choices before that thing.
00:52:55.000 That's my point.
00:52:56.000 It's like if there's people out there that are pushing ridiculous conspiracy theories, who are you worried about?
00:53:02.000 Are you worried about it getting to you?
00:53:04.000 No, you're not, right?
00:53:05.000 You're not worried about you believing it.
00:53:07.000 So you think you're smarter than everybody else?
00:53:10.000 Yeah.
00:53:10.000 Well, I think it's just people get deeply uncomfortable with the idea that they're losing control of the public sphere, the public space, right?
00:53:18.000 For so long, you had these mainstream media outlets.
00:53:22.000 They had real direct control.
00:53:24.000 I mean, everything you saw, everything you watched, everything you read, it was under the control of a relatively small amount of people.
00:53:30.000 And this was how it was forever.
00:53:33.000 Right?
00:53:33.000 I mean, this was not like an aberration.
00:53:35.000 This was literally how it was forever.
00:53:37.000 Every single thing you read or saw was curated by a small group of people.
00:53:43.000 And now it's the Wild West.
00:53:46.000 And a lot of people don't.
00:53:47.000 And you're going to get bad information.
00:53:49.000 You're going to get good information.
00:53:50.000 You're going to have to figure out which is which.
00:53:51.000 And the country is not good at doing that.
00:53:54.000 People are not good at doing that.
00:53:56.000 And so people get worried and they're like, wait a minute, but you can't put the genie back in the bottle.
00:54:01.000 Well, the problem is they can.
00:54:03.000 Right, and they will.
00:54:04.000 With, like, Plandemic and all these different videos.
00:54:06.000 Right, they ban them.
00:54:06.000 Yeah, and the video of the bunch of doctors talking about hydroxychloroquine and Z-Pax.
00:54:11.000 And that woman who's a witch doctor, I liked her.
00:54:13.000 I like that witch doctor, and I want to hear more about it.
00:54:16.000 I find her opinions on demons fucking you more interesting than COVID. She needs a podcast.
00:54:21.000 She needs a podcast.
00:54:22.000 I don't care about hydroxychloroquine.
00:54:24.000 I want to know, who are these demons who fuck you in your sleep?
00:54:26.000 We should have her on, you and me with her.
00:54:28.000 Please, if you get her...
00:54:31.000 Me, you, and her would be phenomenal.
00:54:33.000 We could fly her and she wouldn't even wear a mask.
00:54:35.000 She would not wear a mask.
00:54:36.000 She'd fight a cop at LAX. Where does she live?
00:54:40.000 I have no idea.
00:54:41.000 Where does that lady- Where does that woman live?
00:54:43.000 She practices medicine at a strip mall.
00:54:44.000 Have you seen it?
00:54:45.000 No.
00:54:45.000 It's literally like right next to a Zales.
00:54:47.000 But you know, a lot of doctors are bullshit.
00:54:49.000 A lot of doctors, dude.
00:54:51.000 A large percentage, especially in LA. Well, doctors are humans.
00:54:56.000 Humans go to school.
00:54:57.000 They learn to be a doctor.
00:54:58.000 There's a lot of crazy humans.
00:54:59.000 You know, Whitney Cummings said to me when she goes, my doctor friend said, it's a practice, which means we're still practicing.
00:55:04.000 It's like, well, that's not comforting.
00:55:05.000 That's not what practice means.
00:55:06.000 That's not at all what practice means, you freak.
00:55:09.000 But...
00:55:11.000 Dude, LA, there's so many doctors, and I'm like, do you even have a degree?
00:55:15.000 Did you go to medical school?
00:55:17.000 That kind of logic is like when people say program.
00:55:19.000 When you talk about TV programs, they're programming you, bro.
00:55:21.000 They're letting you know.
00:55:22.000 Yeah, it's that stupid, like, linguistic garbage.
00:55:25.000 What a nightmare.
00:55:27.000 Yeah, it's such a stupid thing.
00:55:29.000 Is there any part of you that's going to miss Los Angeles?
00:55:32.000 Oh, yeah.
00:55:32.000 Yeah.
00:55:33.000 I'm gonna miss it.
00:55:34.000 Sure.
00:55:34.000 I'm definitely gonna miss the store.
00:55:35.000 But I'm missing the Los Angeles that I don't think exists right now.
00:55:38.000 Right.
00:55:39.000 When you go down Melrose and you see everything boarded up and you see fucking homeless encampments everywhere.
00:55:43.000 Like, I took the wife to Venice.
00:55:45.000 Yeah.
00:55:46.000 And I've talked about this before, unfortunately.
00:55:48.000 Sorry if you heard it before.
00:55:49.000 But driving by, I parked at a red light, you know, stopped at a red light, rather.
00:55:52.000 And there's this fucking house to my left.
00:55:54.000 It's probably worth $5 million.
00:55:55.000 And right across the street, there's 10 tents.
00:55:58.000 Right.
00:55:58.000 So imagine your fucking kid is in your front lawn.
00:56:01.000 You made it.
00:56:02.000 You got a beautiful house in Venice.
00:56:04.000 We're five minutes from the beach.
00:56:05.000 I love it.
00:56:06.000 You've got ten junkies camped out in front of your fucking house and needles in the street.
00:56:12.000 Like, this is crazy.
00:56:13.000 And there's fucking tents everywhere.
00:56:15.000 Yeah.
00:56:15.000 I was in Brentwood this morning.
00:56:17.000 It's chaos.
00:56:18.000 Yeah.
00:56:18.000 Dude, you get off the 405, it's just garbage stacked up, seven feet high in tents.
00:56:23.000 Fucking hibachi grills out there.
00:56:26.000 Yeah, that's why I got this house in the desert, because I'm like, I just want to get out.
00:56:29.000 And you know, as soon as you get out there, something happens where it gets really calm, really hot, and there's none of that.
00:56:36.000 That's why I'm moving to Texas.
00:56:37.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:56:37.000 Same thing.
00:56:38.000 Texas is like that.
00:56:39.000 Yeah.
00:56:39.000 Texas is like the regular world, but you wear a mask.
00:56:42.000 Yeah.
00:56:43.000 And a lot of people from Texas, they're all upset that I'm talking about it so much and people are moving out there, but I'm sorry.
00:56:49.000 Sorry you're awesome.
00:56:50.000 Sorry you got an awesome spot.
00:56:51.000 Yeah.
00:56:52.000 It just seems like...
00:56:53.000 First of all, high population centers.
00:56:56.000 This is not a time for high population centers.
00:56:59.000 This is letting everybody know that the whole idea of living in Manhattan, this is going to be great.
00:57:03.000 Everything's there.
00:57:04.000 Right.
00:57:04.000 It was.
00:57:05.000 It was great.
00:57:06.000 Here she is.
00:57:07.000 Houston, Texas.
00:57:08.000 Woo!
00:57:11.000 Firepowerministries.org.
00:57:12.000 I love that.
00:57:13.000 Woo!
00:57:13.000 Weapon of war.
00:57:14.000 What?
00:57:15.000 Firepower.
00:57:15.000 What is that weapon of war?
00:57:16.000 Give me the full image.
00:57:17.000 Hold on a second.
00:57:18.000 You've got...
00:57:19.000 Hold on.
00:57:19.000 Back, back, back, back.
00:57:20.000 I can't...
00:57:21.000 Yeah, make it there.
00:57:22.000 Firepower Ministries.
00:57:24.000 What is that?
00:57:25.000 God's Battle Axe and Weapon of War.
00:57:27.000 See that?
00:57:27.000 I would have went right to the website, but it was not working.
00:57:29.000 Firepower Ministries.
00:57:30.000 But forget about that.
00:57:31.000 Look at what it says there.
00:57:32.000 God's battle axe and weapon of war.
00:57:34.000 I love it.
00:57:35.000 I think I need that tattooed.
00:57:36.000 Yeah.
00:57:37.000 I think I'm going to get that on my right leg.
00:57:39.000 Firepower Ministries.
00:57:40.000 I love that.
00:57:41.000 Ammunition Ministries.
00:57:42.000 And weapon of war.
00:57:43.000 AK-47 Ministries.
00:57:45.000 I'm going to put that on my heel.
00:57:46.000 Where is she?
00:57:47.000 The Christian Resource Center.
00:57:49.000 She's right there.
00:57:49.000 That sounds good.
00:57:50.000 Firepower Ministries.
00:57:51.000 Fire Power Ministries.
00:57:52.000 Prayer, deliverance, counseling, bookstore, print shop, gifts.
00:57:56.000 I will send a limo to get you.
00:57:58.000 Gifts and more.
00:57:59.000 Bring you to Austin.
00:58:00.000 We do a podcast.
00:58:01.000 We're going to have a good time.
00:58:02.000 It sounds fun.
00:58:03.000 It looks legit.
00:58:04.000 Yeah.
00:58:05.000 There's a whole witchcraft section.
00:58:07.000 Oh.
00:58:07.000 Hey!
00:58:08.000 Well, if you don't get a book on witchcraft, how are you going to learn?
00:58:10.000 You've got to go to a witch and they might lie to you.
00:58:13.000 I'm all for her protecting us from witches.
00:58:16.000 Well, God's Battle Axe and Weapon of War?
00:58:19.000 Imagine writing that on your Twitter.
00:58:20.000 Man, this is her time, huh?
00:58:21.000 Everybody out there, please, listen to me.
00:58:23.000 I've never asked for anything to you people.
00:58:25.000 I want everybody to update your Twitter bio to God's Battle Axe and Weapon of War.
00:58:30.000 I want everyone to do it.
00:58:31.000 I may do that, too.
00:58:32.000 I may do that.
00:58:33.000 God's Battle Axe and Weapon of War.
00:58:35.000 I'm going to do that right now.
00:58:37.000 I'll do it too.
00:58:38.000 Let's do that right now.
00:58:39.000 It's important.
00:58:39.000 While we're on the...
00:58:40.000 It's important to show solidarity with that woman and her...
00:58:43.000 God's battle axe and weapon of war.
00:58:46.000 Firepower ministries.
00:58:48.000 Yes.
00:58:49.000 God's battle axe and weapon of war.
00:58:50.000 Edit profile.
00:58:52.000 Edit profile.
00:58:54.000 Here we go.
00:58:55.000 Everybody's coming out of the woodwork now.
00:58:58.000 Like you have a lot of different...
00:59:00.000 If you had anything to do with medicine at all, you could come out now and just...
00:59:05.000 You could build a brand.
00:59:07.000 She's building a brand.
00:59:08.000 It's a Bible verse, apparently.
00:59:10.000 Oh, really?
00:59:10.000 Yeah.
00:59:11.000 Oh, really?
00:59:11.000 You are my war club.
00:59:13.000 Maybe I should leave it alone, then.
00:59:15.000 Yeah.
00:59:18.000 I'm already moving to a red state.
00:59:19.000 She's building a brand.
00:59:20.000 I understand what they're doing.
00:59:22.000 Yeah.
00:59:22.000 Hey.
00:59:23.000 You gotta build a brand.
00:59:24.000 It's just what it is.
00:59:24.000 Not everybody can be Alyssa Milana.
00:59:26.000 Some people have to be God's weapon of war.
00:59:30.000 Yeah.
00:59:31.000 Battle axe.
00:59:31.000 Battle axe and weapon of war.
00:59:33.000 What a crazy Bible quote.
00:59:35.000 There's some Bible quotes that make you go.
00:59:36.000 Well, people like her, they don't want the light touch Bible quote.
00:59:40.000 No.
00:59:40.000 They don't want the like, give the old man soup or whatever, you know, some version of that.
00:59:44.000 They want like, the fires will rain through your eye, like that type of intense.
00:59:49.000 Yes, yes.
00:59:50.000 Yeah.
00:59:51.000 Yeah, the apocalypse.
00:59:52.000 They're into that.
00:59:52.000 So many people just really love that vivid imagery from like Book of Revelation.
00:59:57.000 Yes.
00:59:57.000 They want that.
00:59:58.000 Yes.
00:59:59.000 That's the only part of the Bible a lot of them care about.
01:00:01.000 They just want the end.
01:00:02.000 They think it's coming.
01:00:03.000 What's going on here?
01:00:03.000 Give me some.
01:00:04.000 Give me some of this.
01:00:05.000 What is she saying?
01:00:07.000 There are a lot of us that, yes, we gave our life to Christ, but we've been living in sin.
01:00:11.000 Right.
01:00:11.000 Oh, no.
01:00:11.000 There are some of us that we did.
01:00:13.000 You know, we believe that God exists, but we've never surrendered our all to him.
01:00:18.000 That's not reasonable.
01:00:19.000 That's not reasonable.
01:00:22.000 Don't be afraid to give your all to Christ.
01:00:24.000 I'd feel comfortable if she walked into a hospital waiting room and started treating me.
01:00:29.000 I'd feel very comfortable.
01:00:30.000 And then she brought that guy out.
01:00:32.000 And she goes, now meet my nurse.
01:00:34.000 This is my head nurse.
01:00:35.000 You know, what is interesting, though, is the politicalization.
01:00:40.000 Is that a word?
01:00:40.000 Oh, she's rocking out right now.
01:00:46.000 That's exactly like de Blasio's wife.
01:00:48.000 That's de Blasio's wife trying to get a response from people in Central Park.
01:00:52.000 Power to the people!
01:00:54.000 Nothing.
01:00:55.000 Yeah, you gotta wonder.
01:00:59.000 It's a real nightmare out there.
01:01:01.000 It's weird.
01:01:02.000 Yeah, it's really weird.
01:01:03.000 If we can stay alive, it's awesome, though.
01:01:04.000 As long as nobody you love dies in this, it's a good time.
01:01:07.000 Yeah, I think if we come out on the other end, which I think will be next spring, I think we could go through the fall and the winter.
01:01:11.000 It's going to be weird.
01:01:12.000 The election's weird.
01:01:13.000 Like, have you ever looked forward to three months less than these three months of just intense...
01:01:18.000 I have intense anxiety about the election.
01:01:21.000 Right.
01:01:21.000 Like, I'm where I'm like, oof.
01:01:23.000 Yeah.
01:01:23.000 This could be bad.
01:01:24.000 Could go interestingly.
01:01:26.000 It could be a real mess in this country.
01:01:28.000 I think it'll be a mess no matter who gets in.
01:01:31.000 It'll be less of a mess if Biden wins, I think.
01:01:32.000 I think if Biden wins, it'll be less of a mess.
01:01:34.000 And I think people will shut.
01:01:36.000 I'm hoping people will shut up.
01:01:38.000 Like, can people just shut up?
01:01:41.000 They're not going to shut up.
01:01:41.000 Yeah.
01:01:42.000 They're not going to shut up.
01:01:43.000 Because first of all, the Trump people, if Biden wins, they're going to be furious.
01:01:46.000 Right.
01:01:47.000 And Trump has said that this mail-in vote thing is going to be ripe for fraud.
01:01:52.000 Maybe he's not wrong about that either.
01:01:54.000 I don't know enough about it, but I don't know why we can't have a regular election with masks.
01:02:00.000 Well, I don't know why we can't entertain this, seeing as how you and I don't know what the fuck we're talking about.
01:02:04.000 Let's just go all in and say, I believe it could be a fraud.
01:02:08.000 The mail-in?
01:02:09.000 Yeah.
01:02:09.000 I think it could be too.
01:02:10.000 I think they should vote online.
01:02:12.000 How come you can do banking online?
01:02:13.000 That could be fraud too.
01:02:14.000 Because then Russian trolls and Chinese trolls and all the trolls and bots.
01:02:18.000 Meanwhile, you bank online.
01:02:19.000 No problem.
01:02:20.000 What's more important to you than your money?
01:02:21.000 Nothing.
01:02:22.000 Nothing.
01:02:22.000 It's a good point.
01:02:23.000 Meanwhile, they figured out how to do that.
01:02:25.000 Let's just have a regular election.
01:02:26.000 Six feet distancing, mask, spray everything down in between.
01:02:29.000 I mean, what are we doing?
01:02:31.000 Your phone opens up with your face, right?
01:02:33.000 Yeah.
01:02:33.000 Mine does, at least.
01:02:34.000 Or your fingerprint.
01:02:35.000 Why can't you use that?
01:02:36.000 Well, I agree with you, but I don't know why we can't have a traditional regular election with masks and distancing.
01:02:42.000 We certainly can.
01:02:43.000 I think we can.
01:02:44.000 I think it's stupid not to, especially in an election that's going to be this contentious anyway.
01:02:48.000 We should probably just have a regular election with masks and distancing.
01:02:51.000 I wonder what it's going to be like at the polls.
01:02:53.000 And then like if really elderly people, yes, you should go to nursing homes that are really elderly people and let them touch a computer screen.
01:03:03.000 Like, let my mother go in there and let my mother touch it, because she loves Trump.
01:03:07.000 She asked me the other day, she goes, can you get me a MAGA hat?
01:03:10.000 She said that?
01:03:11.000 Yeah.
01:03:11.000 She's schizophrenic, but she loves him.
01:03:13.000 She's kind of his base.
01:03:14.000 She goes, I love Trump.
01:03:22.000 She goes, he's just trying to do the right thing for the country, you know?
01:03:25.000 I'm going to take a picture of you in full stride.
01:03:27.000 She goes, your Aunt Donna doesn't understand that Donald Trump's trying to save us from the people that want to hurt us.
01:03:32.000 I was like, yeah.
01:03:33.000 I was like, that's Aunt Donna.
01:03:35.000 Always trying to let the people in to hurt us.
01:03:36.000 Fucking Aunt Donna.
01:03:37.000 Everybody has one.
01:03:38.000 Yeah.
01:03:39.000 So, I mean, that's my...
01:03:40.000 Here's a question.
01:03:41.000 Yeah.
01:03:42.000 Who's going to name the kid Karen after all this?
01:03:44.000 Oh God, that name's out.
01:03:45.000 It's a rough year.
01:03:46.000 But you know, Timmy, my name, that happened to too.
01:03:48.000 Every pussy that was being described in the 80s was like, little Timmy!
01:03:53.000 Everyone.
01:03:54.000 Everyone, dude.
01:03:55.000 And that name has decreased in popularity, which is fine.
01:03:58.000 I don't want a name that everyone has.
01:04:00.000 But everybody, that was the pussy name forever.
01:04:03.000 It was like Timmy.
01:04:04.000 What about Adolph?
01:04:06.000 By the way, not a good guy, great name.
01:04:09.000 It's not a bad name.
01:04:10.000 It's a great name.
01:04:11.000 Yeah.
01:04:12.000 It's a strong name.
01:04:13.000 Wilhelm.
01:04:13.000 Clip this and send this around.
01:04:15.000 It's a strong name.
01:04:20.000 Wilhelm.
01:04:21.000 You can't use it anymore.
01:04:22.000 You can't use Adolph anymore.
01:04:24.000 Yeah, but I... How many kids a year...
01:04:26.000 Let's do a poll.
01:04:27.000 How many kids a year are named Adolph?
01:04:32.000 Probably nobody.
01:04:34.000 Nobody, right?
01:04:35.000 I want to know.
01:04:36.000 I want to know how many children...
01:04:37.000 I mean, you want to talk about a social justice warrior?
01:04:39.000 The guy who's named Adolf's got to go hard left.
01:04:41.000 What?
01:04:42.000 Well, actually, hold on.
01:04:44.000 What does it say?
01:04:44.000 I thought this was like a U.S. article.
01:04:46.000 What does it say?
01:04:47.000 Well, why?
01:04:49.000 Europe's all in.
01:04:49.000 There's official records on it, apparently.
01:04:52.000 Official records show that only 13 children were named Adolf between 2006 and 2013. Follow them, Netflix Doc.
01:04:58.000 It's made a small comeback since then.
01:04:59.000 46 children have been named Adolf since then.
01:05:01.000 Oh yeah, the way Germany's going, there's going to be a lot of Adolfs being born.
01:05:04.000 Yeah, because they've got some issues.
01:05:06.000 How crazy is that?
01:05:07.000 How low that number is.
01:05:08.000 Follow those 13 kids.
01:05:10.000 That's a great Netflix documentary.
01:05:11.000 You just call it 13 Adolfs.
01:05:14.000 And you follow them and see how they deal with having the name of a genocidal monster.
01:05:22.000 Maybe!
01:05:23.000 You could be Genghis.
01:05:24.000 You could name your kid Genghis.
01:05:26.000 Is it Genghis or Genghis?
01:05:28.000 Genghis.
01:05:28.000 Genghis Khan.
01:05:29.000 I like Genghis.
01:05:29.000 Genghis is fine, too.
01:05:30.000 I've said Genghis.
01:05:31.000 But I think you're really supposed to say Genghis.
01:05:33.000 Oh, Katrina.
01:05:34.000 Caitlin?
01:05:35.000 Wait a minute.
01:05:35.000 Hold on.
01:05:36.000 No more Catelyns.
01:05:37.000 Monica?
01:05:37.000 Monicas are out?
01:05:38.000 Isis.
01:05:39.000 There's a few Isis.
01:05:40.000 Dude, have you ever gone somewhere and you see someone of Middle Eastern descent and their name is Isis?
01:05:44.000 It's like a beautiful name, Isis.
01:05:46.000 Ellen's rough.
01:05:48.000 Ellen is like an old...
01:05:49.000 But it's a rough one now.
01:05:50.000 It's a rough one now because she was running Abu Ghraib in the back of her show.
01:05:56.000 That's a rough one.
01:05:57.000 She's out there dancing with Kristen Bell and in the back there's people that are getting up on the rack like this.
01:06:02.000 It's so weird when you see a lot of people saying that someone who seems so nice is not nice at all.
01:06:08.000 She doesn't seem nice.
01:06:10.000 People have a very poor judge of character.
01:06:12.000 She doesn't seem nice.
01:06:13.000 It seems forced.
01:06:14.000 People that are like that all the time, it doesn't seem nice.
01:06:17.000 It's very forced.
01:06:18.000 And whatever.
01:06:19.000 You're allowed to be a bitch, right?
01:06:20.000 You're allowed to be a bitch.
01:06:21.000 You're allowed to be nasty to people.
01:06:22.000 You're accomplished.
01:06:23.000 You're a comedian.
01:06:23.000 You did the whole thing.
01:06:24.000 What you're not allowed to do is have a Guantanamo Bay situation in the backstage.
01:06:31.000 Of your show where everybody's walking around afraid for their life and it's like Abu Ghraib where they're hooked up to wires and they have like...
01:06:39.000 Dogs around them.
01:06:39.000 Yeah, she's got dogs and hoods.
01:06:41.000 If an intern's late, they have a hood on.
01:06:43.000 I don't support that.
01:06:44.000 That's just me.
01:06:46.000 Yeah, I'm with you.
01:06:47.000 Yeah, I mean, you know, I wish she's done.
01:06:50.000 She's around for too long.
01:06:52.000 James Corden.
01:06:52.000 All these people.
01:06:53.000 Walk away.
01:06:54.000 You've been famous forever.
01:06:55.000 Walk away.
01:06:56.000 Eventually, everybody, they're just going to figure it out.
01:06:59.000 Now Fallon's on an apology tour because of the blackface.
01:07:02.000 Is he?
01:07:03.000 Well, he was.
01:07:04.000 He had to go around and apologize a million times.
01:07:06.000 They're going to find the thing if you don't go away.
01:07:10.000 You gotta have a good run.
01:07:12.000 And when you have a good run, you step back and you go, okay, I'm still gonna do my thing, but I'm not...
01:07:16.000 I mean, there's only a few jobs in entertainment, right?
01:07:18.000 Right.
01:07:19.000 So I think a lot of the cancel culture shit is probably these motherfuckers want those jobs.
01:07:23.000 Ooh.
01:07:24.000 They're like, how long is this bitch gonna be dancing?
01:07:26.000 I can dance with Hillary Clinton.
01:07:28.000 I could do the Charleston with Henry Kissinger or whatever the fuck she does out there.
01:07:31.000 The Charleston?
01:07:32.000 Is that what it is?
01:07:33.000 She goes out there to do the Charleston.
01:07:35.000 She's got war criminals.
01:07:36.000 Her and Bush are jumping around.
01:07:37.000 That's right.
01:07:38.000 She was buddies with Bush.
01:07:39.000 She's a CIA agent.
01:07:42.000 Stephen Paddock.
01:07:43.000 Do not ask me for sources.
01:07:45.000 But Stephen Paddock.
01:07:48.000 Who's that?
01:07:49.000 He was the guy that shot up the Vegas concert.
01:07:52.000 That was a very tragic thing.
01:07:54.000 Listen to this.
01:07:54.000 The only guy that saw Steven Paddock alive, his name is Jesus Campos.
01:07:58.000 He was a guard at Mandalay Bay.
01:07:59.000 He got interviewed nowhere else.
01:08:01.000 You know where he got interviewed in the beginning?
01:08:03.000 Ellen.
01:08:04.000 Really?
01:08:05.000 Weird.
01:08:05.000 And then they went on, if you could find that clip, they went on with a weird, like, diagram of how it happened, and Ellen's, like, showing the people how it happened.
01:08:13.000 Not like an emotional, like, how are you feeling?
01:08:15.000 How are you holding up?
01:08:16.000 It was a weird diagram of, like, and then he went to the left and to the right.
01:08:19.000 It was very strange to me.
01:08:21.000 What the hell's going on?
01:08:23.000 This is a daytime show.
01:08:24.000 Which is the paddock guy?
01:08:26.000 There's two guys there?
01:08:27.000 The chubbier guy is the Jesus guy.
01:08:29.000 And now Ellen is doing a thing of how this shooting happened.
01:08:32.000 Look at how she's got an antenna from someone's Buick that she's popped off and she's using it as a pointer.
01:08:37.000 But why the hell is this happening on a daytime show?
01:08:40.000 This is weird.
01:08:41.000 Where'd she get that pointer?
01:08:42.000 I don't know.
01:08:42.000 She stole it off an intern's car.
01:08:45.000 Why wouldn't you just use your finger?
01:08:47.000 If that was you, if it was your show, the Jim Dillon show, wouldn't you just point?
01:08:50.000 Yeah.
01:08:51.000 This is also a giant screen behind her, so they could have just put it on that screen.
01:08:55.000 But she's using this thing.
01:08:57.000 I find it very strange.
01:08:58.000 I don't know why.
01:08:59.000 Wait a minute.
01:08:59.000 Those aren't real palm trees?
01:09:01.000 No.
01:09:02.000 I know that street, though.
01:09:03.000 I know that block in Beverly Hills that she used.
01:09:05.000 How weird is that?
01:09:06.000 I don't know why they're doing this on a daytime talk show.
01:09:09.000 Let's keep it running.
01:09:09.000 Look at it.
01:09:10.000 She's dressed like Colonel Sanders.
01:09:12.000 Not Colonel Sanders.
01:09:13.000 She's dressed like Sgt. Pepper.
01:09:14.000 This guy looks like a member of her staff.
01:09:16.000 What kind of outfit is she wearing?
01:09:18.000 I don't know.
01:09:19.000 She wears those weird militant lesbian uniforms.
01:09:22.000 Yeah, that should tell you something.
01:09:23.000 It does an odd look with all those buttons.
01:09:26.000 Why do you have so many wrist buttons?
01:09:27.000 It was given to her in Langley.
01:09:29.000 The only reason why you have that many wrist buttons is if you're looking to clothes on somebody.
01:09:32.000 Yeah, look at her.
01:09:33.000 Everyone says she looks so friendly.
01:09:34.000 Yeah, she looks friendly.
01:09:36.000 She does look very military.
01:09:38.000 Yeah, she's a militant woman.
01:09:39.000 With a very expensive watch, too.
01:09:41.000 She dealt with a lot of discrimination when she came out.
01:09:43.000 It was very sad, but then she joined the CIA. Her house got broken into while she was at home.
01:09:48.000 Really?
01:09:49.000 Yeah, she's got a dope place in Montecito.
01:09:52.000 And they broke in while she was there.
01:09:54.000 And those people are still being tortured to this day.
01:09:56.000 Probably.
01:09:57.000 They're still in an underground jail.
01:09:58.000 Yeah, she's feeding them to her staff.
01:10:01.000 She's like, it's okay.
01:10:02.000 Don't worry about it.
01:10:03.000 She goes, you did good.
01:10:04.000 Is that the guy, the survivor?
01:10:06.000 He's the guy who met Paddock.
01:10:08.000 She's holding on to him.
01:10:08.000 It's odd.
01:10:09.000 She's allowed to do that because she's a woman, but if that was a man holding on to a woman's arm that long, it'd be rape.
01:10:15.000 It'd be a real problem.
01:10:17.000 Yeah, that's for sure.
01:10:19.000 So weird, man.
01:10:21.000 What a strange interview, man.
01:10:22.000 I mean, the whole situation was strange.
01:10:26.000 What a strange thing.
01:10:26.000 They never really figured out why that guy did that.
01:10:29.000 There was no motive.
01:10:29.000 He has a very little footprint online.
01:10:32.000 He was a professional gambler, right?
01:10:34.000 Yeah, he was.
01:10:35.000 He made a lot of money doing that.
01:10:36.000 Jamie's just...
01:10:37.000 What did you do?
01:10:37.000 Jamie knows.
01:10:38.000 You don't know?
01:10:39.000 That's what they said.
01:10:40.000 What do you think?
01:10:40.000 That's what they said.
01:10:41.000 Well, I don't know.
01:10:42.000 You tell me what's going on.
01:10:42.000 That's the story.
01:10:43.000 Okay, but you just made a noise.
01:10:45.000 Like, this is bullshit.
01:10:46.000 Professional gamblers?
01:10:47.000 Not...
01:10:48.000 That's a lot of professional gamblers, buddy.
01:10:50.000 Not about playing video poker.
01:10:51.000 Is that what he does?
01:10:52.000 Yeah.
01:10:53.000 That's all he did?
01:10:54.000 Yeah.
01:10:54.000 He was an arms dealer.
01:10:55.000 No, I don't know that.
01:10:56.000 But I just see the way I said it very definitively.
01:10:59.000 He was an arms dealer.
01:11:01.000 He did have a lot of fucking guns.
01:11:04.000 It's just very strange, and a lot of times what happens is, you know...
01:11:08.000 Oh, she gave him a check for $25,000.
01:11:09.000 Oh, well, good for her.
01:11:11.000 A big-ass check, too.
01:11:12.000 That's good.
01:11:14.000 Yeah, imagine if you won a lotto and they gave you a check that big and it's $25,000.
01:11:17.000 By the way, after taxes, that's not even any money.
01:11:19.000 How about put a zero on that, bitch?
01:11:20.000 It's like, bitch, how about you give me some real money and not $8,000?
01:11:25.000 When we would give people $50,000 to win Fear Factor, the government, I think, takes $16,000.
01:11:31.000 Yeah, it's crazy.
01:11:32.000 Yeah, you get 34. Dude, when you do your first job in comedy, you have to join SAG, which is $3,000, so a lot of times you're like negative.
01:11:38.000 Yeah.
01:11:39.000 You have to pay three grand to join the Screen Actors Guild, and then you're fine.
01:11:42.000 I mean, it's wild.
01:11:43.000 Well, what they're doing right now in California tax is they're trying to retroactively tax everybody.
01:11:48.000 Up to 16.8%.
01:11:49.000 Which is hilarious.
01:11:50.000 Yeah, it's crazy.
01:11:50.000 You're going back to January.
01:11:52.000 You're like, you know, I know you were living here over the last seven months, assuming that your tax rate was what it is, and you budgeted for that, but no, we're going to steal your money.
01:12:03.000 Are they going to be able to do that?
01:12:04.000 I don't know, they're proposing.
01:12:05.000 They're saying 16.8% for top earners, and then...
01:12:10.000 It's going to be high no matter what, because it was $13, and a lot of people will be paying $14.
01:12:15.000 It's a lot of money to go to a state that doesn't manage money well and doesn't seem to fix any of the problems.
01:12:21.000 Especially if you're that guy that's got that multi-million dollar house in front of fucking tents.
01:12:25.000 And you're like, what am I doing?
01:12:27.000 Yeah, what am I doing?
01:12:27.000 I work my fucking ass off 10 hours a day.
01:12:30.000 I come home exhausted, try to spend some quality time with my family.
01:12:33.000 I'm dodging needles in my fucking front yard, and I'm paying 16%?
01:12:37.000 I don't know if he's spending quality time with the kids, but he's still like, he's like, I got some hookers and coke, and this is still a problem.
01:12:43.000 He's like, they don't want to come over here and walk through tents.
01:12:46.000 These women are professionals.
01:12:48.000 Yeah, I don't know that that guy's coming home to his kids.
01:12:50.000 They get into Uber.
01:12:50.000 No, he pays someone to watch the kids.
01:12:52.000 Yeah, but no, it's falling apart here very quickly.
01:12:55.000 I wonder what's going to happen.
01:12:56.000 How far can it fall apart?
01:12:58.000 Not that far.
01:13:00.000 It can fall further.
01:13:01.000 Don't get crazy.
01:13:02.000 It will fall further.
01:13:03.000 Go to Machu Picchu.
01:13:04.000 There's no one there.
01:13:05.000 That's a good point.
01:13:06.000 Yeah, man.
01:13:07.000 All these places.
01:13:08.000 It's going to be taken over by the TikTok kids.
01:13:10.000 You already see it happening.
01:13:11.000 That's why Trump's trying to ban TikTok.
01:13:13.000 They're 16 years old.
01:13:14.000 They literally run LA, these 16-year-old kids.
01:13:17.000 They go to that steakhouse boa, and they all walk around in bedazzled jackets, and there's paparazzi outside.
01:13:23.000 And these paparazzi, their job, yeah, they go like, as the world's burning, these kids are doing this.
01:13:27.000 The paparazzi's job is to ask these kids, like, what's going on?
01:13:31.000 And they're kids, and they literally have responses like a regular child would.
01:13:36.000 They'll be like, what's going on, Madison?
01:13:38.000 And she's like, I'm trying to get a car.
01:13:40.000 And he's like, all right, right.
01:13:42.000 Right.
01:13:43.000 It's so sick.
01:13:44.000 Like, this is that guy's life.
01:13:46.000 He's got to follow around these children.
01:13:48.000 At least used to follow around Sandra Bullock.
01:13:50.000 Now you're following around a kid who, like, does this.
01:13:53.000 There's one dude that was a comic.
01:13:55.000 Oh, he's still a comic.
01:13:55.000 But he was a TMZ guy for a while.
01:13:58.000 Yes, I know that guy.
01:13:59.000 I've met that guy.
01:14:00.000 Good dude.
01:14:00.000 Good looking guy.
01:14:01.000 He was like one of those TMZ guys.
01:14:02.000 Yeah, very nice guy.
01:14:03.000 I meet him at the airport all the time.
01:14:04.000 Sometimes that answers questions and sometimes like, bro.
01:14:06.000 How embarrassing is that, though?
01:14:09.000 I get that's his job.
01:14:10.000 It's tough for a fellow comic.
01:14:11.000 And we're talking.
01:14:12.000 I'm like, come on.
01:14:13.000 I get it.
01:14:14.000 But he was cool.
01:14:15.000 If I told him, dude, I'm so fucking tired and I'm not going to comment on my friend's death.
01:14:21.000 One of them was Anthony Bourdain.
01:14:23.000 Right after Anthony Bourdain died, I'm like, I can't, man.
01:14:26.000 What a way to make a list.
01:14:27.000 I feel bad for those guys who have to camp out outside of a Starbucks and interview 16-year-olds.
01:14:32.000 You're like, what's the drama this week?
01:14:33.000 They also know where you are somehow.
01:14:35.000 Oh, they're stalking these kids.
01:14:37.000 How do they get the flight information?
01:14:39.000 That's what I want to know.
01:14:40.000 No one's done that to me, Joe.
01:14:42.000 I don't know.
01:14:42.000 I always want to know how they get the flight information.
01:14:45.000 I don't know.
01:14:45.000 They know what airline you're on.
01:14:47.000 It's weird.
01:14:48.000 Yeah.
01:14:49.000 I don't know.
01:14:50.000 I don't know.
01:14:50.000 They must have someone inside the airline.
01:14:52.000 They send them money or something like that.
01:14:54.000 They must have some sort of a- That's interesting.
01:14:56.000 So then they show up at LAX at the right time.
01:14:59.000 Yeah, not just LAX. They show up when you're getting off the escalator at fucking the fourth terminal.
01:15:07.000 When you're in Terminal 4 and you're coming down- They know.
01:15:09.000 They're there for you.
01:15:10.000 They're ready.
01:15:10.000 Wow.
01:15:11.000 It's weird.
01:15:11.000 See, they're outside of the restaurants in Beverly Hills a lot of times.
01:15:14.000 But those fucking people that go to those restaurants, they know what restaurants they're going to get.
01:15:19.000 Like if you go to Craig's or any of those.
01:15:22.000 And the food at a lot, I like Craig's, but a lot of those Beverly Hills restaurants, it's not good.
01:15:26.000 Well, it's a scene.
01:15:27.000 It's a scene.
01:15:27.000 Yeah.
01:15:28.000 It's exactly what it is.
01:15:29.000 But the food is like, you go, this is horrific.
01:15:31.000 Like if you go to Nobu in Malibu, they don't let them on the property.
01:15:34.000 Yeah.
01:15:34.000 So they're on the street yelling at you.
01:15:35.000 They yell at you.
01:15:36.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:15:36.000 So there's like the parking lot.
01:15:38.000 Yeah.
01:15:38.000 And then there's the restaurant.
01:15:39.000 Are you going to miss that stuff?
01:15:40.000 Are you going to miss like the Nobu in Malibu, like the food, like the sushi?
01:15:43.000 No!
01:15:44.000 No?
01:15:44.000 I eat meat.
01:15:45.000 I know.
01:15:46.000 I eat meat.
01:15:46.000 You don't like fish.
01:15:47.000 You don't like fish.
01:15:48.000 It's okay.
01:15:48.000 I eat it when there's no meat around.
01:15:50.000 Yeah, my dad's friend owned a steakhouse.
01:15:52.000 He said that.
01:15:52.000 He goes, fish is perfectly good if there's no meat.
01:15:56.000 Yeah, I like meat.
01:15:57.000 Well, the good thing about fish is you can eat it all day long and no one gets mad at you.
01:16:00.000 If you eat meat, people think you're a terrible person.
01:16:02.000 Meanwhile, there's plenty of cows and we're sucking fish out of the ocean in record numbers.
01:16:06.000 The ocean's going to be drained of sashimi.
01:16:09.000 Yeah, but you know what?
01:16:10.000 No generation before us ever worried about us.
01:16:13.000 So it's like, I'm going to eat the sashimi and the kids can figure it out.
01:16:15.000 Let the TikTok fucks figure out how to get more salmon.
01:16:18.000 But there's no shortage of cattle.
01:16:20.000 Like, you can grow cattle like crazy.
01:16:21.000 Isn't the problem that they fart and then it causes methane?
01:16:24.000 I mean, I know, but that's what they say.
01:16:26.000 But then they did an actual survey.
01:16:28.000 See if you can find that.
01:16:29.000 They did some sort of a satellite image of the United States and they found out that the large majority of methane release is coming from dumps and coming from landfills.
01:16:38.000 Interesting.
01:16:39.000 Yeah.
01:16:39.000 Which makes sense.
01:16:40.000 Interesting.
01:16:40.000 Of course it does.
01:16:41.000 Of course.
01:16:41.000 All that food and everything's rotting and it's just going straight up in the air.
01:16:44.000 Well, all of those, you know, people criticize me because it's political, but what's very interesting is like sugar gets away with everything.
01:16:50.000 Yeah.
01:16:50.000 Sugar is like a...
01:16:51.000 There was a comedian who did a great joke.
01:16:53.000 I think it was Baron Vaughn.
01:16:54.000 And it was like, he goes, cocaine and heroin look at sugar and go, fuck, that's the fucking dude.
01:16:59.000 That's the real drug.
01:17:00.000 He's everywhere.
01:17:01.000 Yeah.
01:17:01.000 I mean, that's the real...
01:17:03.000 He's in all the supermarkets.
01:17:03.000 Yeah.
01:17:03.000 So, I mean, sugar is just so endemic in our culture.
01:17:07.000 Yeah.
01:17:08.000 And it's not that political.
01:17:09.000 And it is very addictive.
01:17:11.000 Oh, yeah.
01:17:11.000 Really addictive.
01:17:12.000 Me and Ari Shafir did this and Big Jay Oakerson, a few people.
01:17:15.000 We did this SlimFast challenge for like two weeks.
01:17:17.000 And you read the SlimFast ingredients, all sugar.
01:17:20.000 Yeah.
01:17:20.000 You're just drinking a chocolate milkshake.
01:17:22.000 Yeah, it just doesn't have much calories other than the sugar.
01:17:24.000 Right.
01:17:24.000 And it fills you up in some weird way.
01:17:26.000 It does.
01:17:26.000 What do you got there, Jamie?
01:17:26.000 What is that?
01:17:27.000 Research shows removing all livestock and poultry from the U.S. alone would only reduce global greenhouse gas emissions by 0.36%.
01:17:37.000 You fucks.
01:17:40.000 Just relax.
01:17:41.000 If you don't eat those cows, they die on their own and no one gets to eat them.
01:17:45.000 Right.
01:17:45.000 That's the problem.
01:17:46.000 Yeah.
01:17:47.000 So you've got to eat the cows.
01:17:48.000 Yeah, this idea that you're going to save the world, that was something that was promoted by a lot of these bullshit propaganda vegan movies.
01:17:54.000 Right.
01:17:54.000 That if you, like, greenhouse gases are all coming from that.
01:17:56.000 No, no, no.
01:17:57.000 No, look, a lot of greenhouse gases are coming from shipping produce, folks.
01:18:00.000 Right.
01:18:00.000 It's unfortunate.
01:18:01.000 It's true.
01:18:02.000 Agreed.
01:18:02.000 There's a lot of problems with growing things, like almonds, that you're using so much fucking water to grow these things.
01:18:09.000 You're drinking almond milk.
01:18:11.000 I drink almond milk.
01:18:12.000 What's your feeling on whole milk?
01:18:14.000 I think raw milk is probably good for you.
01:18:17.000 What's raw milk?
01:18:18.000 It doesn't bother me.
01:18:19.000 Raw milk, non-homogenized, non-pasteurized.
01:18:22.000 Where do you find that?
01:18:22.000 You can only get it in some stores.
01:18:24.000 It's kind of illegal.
01:18:26.000 It's like finding DMT. That's what I was about to say.
01:18:30.000 Sometimes you'll bring up a product.
01:18:31.000 I'm like, how do you even get that?
01:18:33.000 I was drinking raw milk for a while because you could get it at the supermarket.
01:18:36.000 I think you could get it at Whole Foods, but it was good for literally like two days.
01:18:40.000 Does it taste good?
01:18:41.000 It tastes great.
01:18:42.000 Interesting.
01:18:42.000 It's really thick.
01:18:43.000 And you drink it and it doesn't make you feel like shit.
01:18:46.000 There's something about regular milk, which I love.
01:18:49.000 Like milk and cookies.
01:18:50.000 Give me a fucking chocolate chip cookie and a cold glass of milk.
01:18:52.000 Woo!
01:18:53.000 Yeah.
01:18:54.000 It's so good.
01:18:54.000 You dunk it in.
01:18:55.000 Are you a dunker?
01:18:56.000 Do you dunk?
01:18:56.000 I have dunked.
01:18:58.000 Boa has a dessert where it's those warm cookies and they're just a little scoop of ice cream.
01:19:02.000 It's a problem.
01:19:03.000 It's a very good thing.
01:19:04.000 Real good.
01:19:05.000 It's a very good thing.
01:19:06.000 But when you drink regular milk, your stomach's like, alright, we can deal with it.
01:19:10.000 Whatever.
01:19:11.000 But whole milk It just kind of goes in there because it has all the enzymes.
01:19:15.000 It's not boiled down.
01:19:17.000 When your body is drinking pasteurized homogenized milk, the idea is it can stay on the shelf longer, it could feed more people, it also lasts longer, keeps people from getting sick.
01:19:26.000 I get it.
01:19:26.000 All that stuff's good.
01:19:27.000 But the problem is...
01:19:29.000 Your body doesn't know what that is.
01:19:30.000 That's boiled and dead.
01:19:32.000 There's no enzymes in it.
01:19:34.000 When you drink regular milk, your body's like, oh, we know what to do with this.
01:19:37.000 Raw milk.
01:19:38.000 This is milk.
01:19:39.000 It's not this pasteurization.
01:19:41.000 Exactly.
01:19:42.000 Yeah, that's all.
01:19:43.000 And you don't fuck with almond milk.
01:19:44.000 Well, I've had it.
01:19:45.000 It's a little lighter than home milk.
01:19:47.000 It's not milk.
01:19:48.000 It's nonsense.
01:19:49.000 It's a chalkiness.
01:19:50.000 Well, it's some fucking shit where you take almonds and then you soak them.
01:19:55.000 And then you get this murky water, and then you drink that and lie to yourself.
01:19:58.000 And by the way, most almond milk has sugar in it.
01:20:01.000 Like Dunkin', I love Dunkin' and Dad.
01:20:03.000 He's like, dude, almond milk is so healthy!
01:20:05.000 I go, why don't you read how much sugar it is per serving?
01:20:07.000 He's like, 19 grams!
01:20:09.000 I go, yeah, 19 grams.
01:20:11.000 That's why it tastes so good.
01:20:11.000 Everybody lies to themselves.
01:20:12.000 You drink it with an almond milkshake.
01:20:14.000 Well, you go over to Whitney's house, Whitney has all these weird plant-based things, but they're all kind of like weird plant-based chocolate pops and chocolate almond milk and...
01:20:24.000 But she's very thin because she doesn't eat a lot of them.
01:20:26.000 She throws up a lot.
01:20:27.000 Well, that's what she does, too.
01:20:28.000 And she's on speed.
01:20:29.000 Yeah, it's a good point.
01:20:30.000 She does all of those things.
01:20:31.000 All of those things help.
01:20:33.000 You know, the needles.
01:20:34.000 Every now and then I'll call her.
01:20:35.000 She's got like nine needles coming in.
01:20:36.000 I'm like, is this a COVID vaccination?
01:20:37.000 What's going on?
01:20:38.000 She does the NAD. We both do NAD injections.
01:20:42.000 But yeah, I mean, but the plant-based stuff never feels that healthy.
01:20:46.000 Is she on plant-based diets?
01:20:47.000 Is that what she's doing?
01:20:47.000 No, she'll have meat every now and then.
01:20:49.000 Like, I'll bring her food that has meat in it.
01:20:51.000 And she probably eats it like a wolf.
01:20:52.000 Yeah, she'll eat it.
01:20:53.000 I mean, a lot of times I try to bring her like an eggplant parmesan or something that's like in her wheelhouse.
01:20:58.000 Yeah.
01:20:59.000 She's a person- She's dyed her hair pink now like Billie Eilish.
01:21:01.000 When did she do this?
01:21:02.000 She's recently.
01:21:03.000 I mean, she's like gone off the...
01:21:05.000 She's probably losing her marbles.
01:21:06.000 We need a vaccine.
01:21:07.000 It's time.
01:21:07.000 Nikki Glaser was talking about shaving her head on Twitter.
01:21:09.000 I had to reach out to her.
01:21:10.000 Yeah.
01:21:11.000 Did you?
01:21:11.000 Yes, I did.
01:21:12.000 Are you like, bitch, you're stealing my thing?
01:21:16.000 She was saying, I'm doing it in solidarity for my friend who has cancer.
01:21:20.000 By the way, there is no friend.
01:21:22.000 People are having issues.
01:21:25.000 She's coming on next week.
01:21:26.000 I texted her and I'm like, what are you doing?
01:21:29.000 She's like, I'm going crazy.
01:21:31.000 She's in Missouri with her family.
01:21:32.000 She's living with her family.
01:21:33.000 Nikki's great, man.
01:21:35.000 I love her.
01:21:36.000 She's great.
01:21:36.000 She's a fucking great comic.
01:21:38.000 Look at Whitney's hair.
01:21:40.000 She's so crazy.
01:21:41.000 Whitney keeps getting younger.
01:21:43.000 She looks like she's 17 years old.
01:21:44.000 It's because of the adrenochrome.
01:21:45.000 Yeah, it's a good- What's happening there?
01:21:47.000 Where'd that blue shit come from?
01:21:48.000 What is that?
01:21:49.000 What is that?
01:21:50.000 This is her assistant, and he shoots things at her.
01:21:53.000 Oh.
01:21:53.000 She knows how to stay relevant.
01:21:54.000 Her assistant's hilarious.
01:21:55.000 Yeah, he's very funny.
01:21:56.000 The two of them together are very fun together.
01:21:57.000 Yeah, he just like, I don't know, cracks eggs over her head or whatever.
01:22:00.000 I don't know, but it's good.
01:22:01.000 I mean, it works.
01:22:02.000 It's a fun dynamic.
01:22:04.000 She's having a good time.
01:22:05.000 Yeah.
01:22:05.000 She's one of those people that I go, man, how does Whitney function without the store?
01:22:09.000 Which is probably what a lot of people say about me.
01:22:10.000 Right.
01:22:11.000 We'll also define function.
01:22:12.000 I mean, like...
01:22:13.000 Yeah.
01:22:14.000 No, of course.
01:22:14.000 Like, some of us...
01:22:15.000 People are sitting by shooting a potato gun at her in her backyard.
01:22:18.000 Some of us need that fixed.
01:22:20.000 I agree, man.
01:22:21.000 I had to get out of LA. I had to go to the desert because I couldn't handle the feeling every day that things were disintegrating minute by minute.
01:22:28.000 And they are.
01:22:29.000 Yeah.
01:22:30.000 That was wearing on me.
01:22:31.000 So I said, let me just go to a place where there's just 80-year-olds driving golf carts.
01:22:35.000 Yeah.
01:22:35.000 Bob Hope, you just look at Bob Hope's house.
01:22:37.000 It's nice.
01:22:38.000 Joey Diaz had a really good point.
01:22:39.000 I think he's right.
01:22:40.000 He's like, before you leave Joe Rogan, you got to go down there and film that shit.
01:22:44.000 Yeah.
01:22:44.000 Show these motherfuckers.
01:22:45.000 They don't know.
01:22:46.000 They don't know.
01:22:46.000 They don't know.
01:22:47.000 Go down Melrose.
01:22:48.000 They don't know.
01:22:49.000 They don't know what the fuck it's become.
01:22:50.000 Dude, I listened to the episode he did with Lee when they talk about dissolving the church and was like, that was a great fucking episode, man.
01:22:56.000 And it was like emotional.
01:22:57.000 It was like, because that guy, along with you, helped define a whole era of podcasting and comedy and everything.
01:23:03.000 So it's like, when you hear him talk about walking away from LA and why he's doing it and the family, I mean, it's a real impactful thing.
01:23:11.000 Don't tell Joey.
01:23:12.000 This is what's going to happen.
01:23:13.000 He's going to do one winter in New Jersey, and I'm going to call him up.
01:23:16.000 Joey, I bought you a house.
01:23:18.000 I'm going to buy him this beautiful house.
01:23:19.000 Just reroute his plane.
01:23:21.000 Just have his plane land in Austin.
01:23:22.000 I'm going to buy him a beautiful house like on a golf course.
01:23:24.000 I'm going to make sure it's real near walking distance to good food.
01:23:29.000 I'm going to buy him a house.
01:23:31.000 Once I open up a comedy club in Austin.
01:23:33.000 So you're hardcore.
01:23:34.000 You're like going full.
01:23:35.000 I'm gone.
01:23:36.000 You're doing it.
01:23:36.000 I'm gone.
01:23:37.000 Well, I know you're gone, but you're really doing the club and everything.
01:23:39.000 I am fucking doing everything.
01:23:40.000 Wild.
01:23:41.000 Wild.
01:23:41.000 Well, listen.
01:23:41.000 It's exciting.
01:23:42.000 I need comedy.
01:23:43.000 I agree.
01:23:44.000 Also, I feel like Austin is a fantastic artistic community.
01:23:47.000 There's a lot of fantastic music there.
01:23:50.000 It's the live music capital of the world.
01:23:52.000 It is.
01:23:52.000 The food is fucking sensational.
01:23:53.000 Very good.
01:23:54.000 The people are cool as shit.
01:23:55.000 I just felt like that's a good spot.
01:23:57.000 100%.
01:23:58.000 I mean, we all need comedy.
01:23:59.000 I'm doing a tent in Long Island in two weeks at Governor's.
01:24:03.000 They've set up a tent in the parking lot.
01:24:05.000 And I'm doing it because, like, pay.
01:24:07.000 Good for them.
01:24:08.000 Why not?
01:24:09.000 Good for them.
01:24:10.000 Time to start, little by little, figuring out what this is going to look like.
01:24:14.000 Good for them for just fucking adapting.
01:24:17.000 I like that these restaurants, if you go down to Venice, they're taking up the sidewalk.
01:24:22.000 They're like, fuck it.
01:24:22.000 We were all supposed to shoot, I don't want to say what, but me and a bunch of other people were supposed to shoot something for Netflix in August in LA. That never happened.
01:24:31.000 So now it's like, we don't know what the hell's going to happen with that.
01:24:34.000 Yeah, I was going to try to do my next special right around the new year.
01:24:41.000 That was my plan.
01:24:42.000 And you had the garden booked?
01:24:44.000 Oh yeah, I had a lot of shit booked.
01:24:45.000 But my plan was to make this mad run.
01:24:49.000 I was going to do Boston Garden, Madison Square Garden.
01:24:52.000 I had all these theaters booked.
01:24:53.000 Me and Chappelle were doing a bunch of dates.
01:24:55.000 And the thing was to come into like January, February, just fucking coming in hot and do my next special.
01:25:01.000 And now it's like, part of me, look, I'm not happy that this is happening for anybody that's sick or anybody who lost a business, anybody, but you have to be able to adapt and look at the bright side.
01:25:12.000 So for me, what I'm thinking is right now is, at the very least, what I can do is use this as an opportunity to examine what I want to say in my act.
01:25:22.000 Right.
01:25:22.000 Examine it.
01:25:23.000 Instead of just doing bits that I know are killing, because I have a lot of bits that I know are just murdering.
01:25:27.000 Right.
01:25:27.000 And I'm like, oh, hey, should I do that bit?
01:25:29.000 What is that?
01:25:30.000 Is this how I feel?
01:25:31.000 Is this real?
01:25:32.000 Where do I go with this?
01:25:33.000 And then go forth once the year rolls over, I think around 20, 21, January, February, that's most likely, if there's a possibility of doing stand-up again, that's when it's going to open up.
01:25:46.000 Right.
01:25:46.000 Because they're talking about having some sort of a vaccine around December.
01:25:50.000 Well, let's see, but yeah.
01:25:52.000 Sure.
01:25:54.000 I think it's going to get to a point.
01:25:55.000 We're going to get to herd immunity a little quicker than we think.
01:25:58.000 Well, you know, I was talking to Ron Funches yesterday, and I was like, Ron, what if this is it?
01:26:02.000 This is how we live from now on.
01:26:04.000 You could still go to the store.
01:26:06.000 You could wear a mask.
01:26:07.000 You could still go to a restaurant and wear a mask.
01:26:10.000 What would we do?
01:26:11.000 Would we eventually just start doing stand-up again and say, fuck it?
01:26:14.000 If you catch it, you catch it?
01:26:16.000 That's a good question.
01:26:17.000 I don't know.
01:26:18.000 I think that you can reach herd immunity with this at a lower percentage than a lot of other things because they say that we have exposure to previous coronaviruses and that you could maybe start reaching some level of herd immunity around 20 or 30 percent as opposed to 60 percent, which would mean that New York,
01:26:34.000 I mean, the New York COVID cases are very low.
01:26:37.000 That's one of the reasons I'm doing that tent, is because they're very low right now.
01:26:41.000 Yeah, but LA's skyrocketing.
01:26:42.000 LA's skyrocketing, but no one cares.
01:26:44.000 Why is LA skyrocketing?
01:26:47.000 It's the wrath of a vengeful god.
01:26:52.000 I mean, let's be very honest.
01:26:54.000 I mean, do we deserve to not be?
01:26:57.000 No, I think it's skyrocketing because it just went across country.
01:27:00.000 It was just east to west.
01:27:02.000 Everything cool kind of starts in New York, then it ends up in LA to get sold.
01:27:05.000 And get ruined.
01:27:06.000 And get big.
01:27:07.000 And get ruined.
01:27:08.000 So COVID started in New York.
01:27:09.000 You know, it's what happens.
01:27:10.000 COVID here just gives you zits.
01:27:12.000 Yeah.
01:27:12.000 By the time the year rolls around, everybody just uses COVID filters to block your zits out.
01:27:18.000 No one cares.
01:27:18.000 I mean, people are out in the outdoor restaurants.
01:27:20.000 I mean, it doesn't really matter.
01:27:21.000 People are enjoying the restaurants.
01:27:22.000 The outdoor restaurants.
01:27:23.000 But I feel so bad for all the really good restaurants that don't have an outdoor setup.
01:27:26.000 Osteria, Moza, places like that.
01:27:28.000 I'm upset.
01:27:28.000 Nancy Silverton's fucking...
01:27:30.000 APL. APL. That place Felix you like?
01:27:33.000 Felix has an outside.
01:27:33.000 Oh, they do?
01:27:34.000 Oh, it's wonderful.
01:27:35.000 Their whole outside is fantastic.
01:27:37.000 That's awesome.
01:27:37.000 Maybe I'll go there in an edge.
01:27:38.000 They have a next door restaurant that had this whole outside area.
01:27:41.000 They took that over.
01:27:42.000 They have a lot of seating.
01:27:42.000 It's the one thing in the desert, when you go to a restaurant in the desert, you eat the food, you're like chewing it, you're like, what the fuck is this?
01:27:49.000 I don't know what goes on.
01:27:50.000 I go to seafood restaurants out there.
01:27:52.000 I start chewing something.
01:27:53.000 I'm like, I don't even know what this is.
01:27:55.000 There's one good one called Pacifica, which is really good.
01:27:58.000 But there's a lot of restaurants out there in the desert where you go, something's wrong.
01:28:01.000 So you just decided to go out there.
01:28:03.000 Did you previously have experience with Palm Springs?
01:28:05.000 No, but I was in a car and then the riot started.
01:28:10.000 So I was in a car, and the riot started, and I literally, instead of going back to my house, because I live right off Sunset, an apartment right off Sunset, instead of going back, I just got on a 10 East.
01:28:20.000 I'd never even been out there.
01:28:22.000 I just said, I'd put the clothes on my back.
01:28:24.000 Really?
01:28:25.000 I swear to God.
01:28:25.000 I said, I'm getting on a 10 East.
01:28:27.000 What am I going to go?
01:28:28.000 I look like a cop.
01:28:29.000 I look like a guy that should be burned alive.
01:28:31.000 For every sin that this country has committed, right?
01:28:35.000 No one would care.
01:28:36.000 My own parents would be like, he probably did something to deserve that.
01:28:40.000 So I'm like, I'm getting the fuck out of here because I get lit up immediately.
01:28:44.000 So I just started driving into 10 East.
01:28:46.000 I got an Airbnb.
01:28:47.000 I talked to some dude.
01:28:47.000 I'm like, hey, it was a nice Airbnb.
01:28:49.000 And I just got out there and I'm like, I fucking love it out here.
01:28:52.000 It's just nice.
01:28:53.000 It's just quiet.
01:28:54.000 I know people have vacation spots out there.
01:28:56.000 Yeah, of course.
01:28:57.000 And then I just said to myself, if I'm not at the store, and I'm not doing anything, I can drive in and do podcasts.
01:29:05.000 I can easily drive in.
01:29:06.000 How long did it take you to get here?
01:29:09.000 Under two.
01:29:10.000 Oh, that's not bad.
01:29:10.000 About two.
01:29:11.000 Sounds like a San Diego trip.
01:29:12.000 All the traffic is Ventura Freeway.
01:29:14.000 Have you ever thought about living down there, like La Jolla?
01:29:16.000 No.
01:29:17.000 No?
01:29:18.000 I'm not a surfer.
01:29:19.000 You know what I mean?
01:29:21.000 I came here to do stand-up comedy.
01:29:24.000 I came here to create things.
01:29:26.000 I didn't come here to be a surfer.
01:29:28.000 I didn't come here to do yoga.
01:29:29.000 I didn't come here to join a cult.
01:29:31.000 I didn't come here to do any of that.
01:29:32.000 I'm an East Coast guy.
01:29:34.000 East Coast is where I was born and raised.
01:29:36.000 Which makes sense that you're in the Palm Desert.
01:29:38.000 Yeah, because it's, well, what are you going to do?
01:29:40.000 I can't go move back to New York, get shot in the face.
01:29:43.000 So I'm staying there until December, until the holidays, and then I'll figure out, you know, who knows, we'll see what's happening in the world.
01:29:48.000 The violence rate in New York right now is off the charts.
01:29:52.000 It's a little too much.
01:29:53.000 It's so crazy.
01:29:54.000 It's a lot.
01:29:56.000 How are they going to turn that back?
01:29:57.000 It'll turn around, dude.
01:29:58.000 In five years, it's a cycle.
01:30:00.000 It'll bottom out a little bit.
01:30:01.000 Or it'll be done forever.
01:30:04.000 It'll be a cycle, dude.
01:30:06.000 In five years, a bunch of rich kids will move in there just like they moved in there in 2009. They'll start doing alternative comedy, dressing like fucking hit flappers.
01:30:15.000 They'll start dripping.
01:30:16.000 And that'll be the resurgence of the city.
01:30:19.000 They'll open a bunch of new coffee houses in what used to be homeless shelters, and it'll just...
01:30:25.000 And it's just a cycle.
01:30:26.000 But what needs to happen now, there's going to be a lot of pain.
01:30:29.000 There's going to be a lot of displacement of people.
01:30:32.000 And then I think this could be the route to the city getting cool again.
01:30:35.000 To maybe younger artistic people coming in, architects doing cool shit, reimagining public spaces.
01:30:42.000 You know, New York needs to get shaken out of its tree a little bit, and so does LA. That's what's happening.
01:30:45.000 Right.
01:30:46.000 I just don't want to be here for it.
01:30:47.000 Like, maybe it'll get dirty and dangerous again.
01:30:50.000 It's gonna get to the point where maybe everything won't suck.
01:30:53.000 Times Square will be like Times Square in the 70s.
01:30:54.000 Yeah!
01:30:55.000 And people that move to New York, they'll be...
01:30:58.000 You know, listen.
01:30:59.000 If you know you could get slashed on the way to the comedy show, you better kill.
01:31:05.000 You better make it work.
01:31:06.000 You have a lot of tension.
01:31:08.000 You better make it work.
01:31:09.000 If it's safe and you and your friends are skipping down the street, you don't ever feel that pressure.
01:31:15.000 Where is that other sock?
01:31:16.000 Right.
01:31:17.000 Pressure is good.
01:31:18.000 Yeah.
01:31:19.000 Maybe.
01:31:19.000 And I think that now you're going to get it.
01:31:21.000 We'll see.
01:31:22.000 Where do you think you're going to wind up?
01:31:24.000 I don't know.
01:31:25.000 Texas is very interesting to me.
01:31:26.000 That's very interesting.
01:31:27.000 I mean, the idea of that is very interesting.
01:31:29.000 I'm going to put up the bat signal for everybody.
01:31:31.000 Yeah.
01:31:31.000 I mean, that's very interesting to me.
01:31:33.000 I mean, I also think, you know, I do like LA, but I don't know what's going to happen.
01:31:37.000 I do like it here.
01:31:38.000 I mean, there, you know, I don't know what I'm going to do.
01:31:40.000 I may manage, you know, I've talked about managing Logan Paul's presidential campaign.
01:31:44.000 I could always move back to do that.
01:31:47.000 We're going to have to talk to Jake, though.
01:31:48.000 He's going to be like Roger Clint.
01:31:49.000 He's in trouble right now.
01:31:50.000 Well, there's a few guns.
01:31:52.000 It's not trouble.
01:31:52.000 He's got a few guns.
01:31:53.000 He's got an arsenal.
01:31:53.000 He's like Billy Carter.
01:31:54.000 He's got an arsenal.
01:31:56.000 Remember Billy Beer?
01:31:57.000 Yeah.
01:31:57.000 There's always a Roger Clinton.
01:31:59.000 There's always a brother who you go, you just sit down.
01:32:02.000 Was it an arsenal thing or was it because he was stealing things from the mall while they were looting?
01:32:07.000 No, I think he was just walking around the mall being what he does, which is with a camera.
01:32:11.000 And then I think, you know, he left, I think, an AK-47 on his hot tub.
01:32:15.000 Like, leaned up against the hot tub.
01:32:17.000 I think somebody ratted him out.
01:32:18.000 Did he show it on Twitter or something?
01:32:20.000 Yeah, there was some...
01:32:21.000 Something on Instagram or something?
01:32:23.000 Dude, a guy like that with that kind of money, I say get more weapons.
01:32:26.000 Get a bioweapons lab.
01:32:28.000 You should have a bat coronavirus going 24-7.
01:32:31.000 Get anthrax.
01:32:32.000 Jake Paul, get anthrax.
01:32:34.000 Who cares?
01:32:35.000 You're going to need it.
01:32:36.000 When LA falls, these are the only fucks that are going to be able to do anything.
01:32:41.000 They're going to have arsenals.
01:32:42.000 That's a good point.
01:32:43.000 Yeah, man.
01:32:43.000 Why not?
01:32:44.000 It's not a bad idea.
01:32:46.000 Yeah.
01:32:46.000 But I don't know.
01:32:47.000 Like, LA's very weird because you're like, where do I fit in?
01:32:50.000 You know, without stand-up comedy, you're like, I podcast and that's good and I try to make that as funny as I can.
01:32:55.000 But then you look around a lot of places of LA, like, I don't really fit in with the actors.
01:32:59.000 And I'm not really one of these kids that's really like a social media guy.
01:33:02.000 And then I'm not one of these writers that, you know, tweet about global warming and Black Lives Matter all day.
01:33:07.000 So you're like, my community of people, which was the store and...
01:33:11.000 And the stand-up comedians have now been like dispersed.
01:33:14.000 So it's like a weird, like I'm like a man without a country.
01:33:17.000 Yeah, I feel like that too.
01:33:18.000 And I want to be adopted by one of these, like someone come in here, like one of these big YouTubers.
01:33:23.000 I don't care.
01:33:25.000 Anybody.
01:33:26.000 One of these guys that walk around, you know, like hypebeasts and these crazy shirts and everything.
01:33:31.000 Just, I'll be one of those guys.
01:33:32.000 Just someone knock on my door.
01:33:34.000 Why don't you start your own thing?
01:33:35.000 Well, I mean...
01:33:36.000 Golf shirts and just screaming.
01:33:37.000 Yeah, sure.
01:33:37.000 Just polos, just like this.
01:33:39.000 Just ill-fitting polos.
01:33:40.000 Yeah.
01:33:41.000 Ill-fitting polos for the American racists.
01:33:45.000 Polos are a weird choice.
01:33:46.000 Like, why is it that that is like what golfer dorks wear?
01:33:50.000 It's the only thing I wear.
01:33:50.000 You know what it is?
01:33:52.000 I've always wanted to look like I've had money, and I've never looked like it.
01:33:56.000 And there's a type of guy that's from...
01:33:59.000 A lot of them live in New York or Long Island or Boston, by the way.
01:34:01.000 Yes.
01:34:02.000 Eyes on.
01:34:02.000 Yes.
01:34:03.000 And they wear these fucking polos and they have no fucking money.
01:34:05.000 And that's the kind of guy that I am where it's like, I always want to look, but they're always sunburned and they've always got like an ill-fitting thing like the collars, like this collar's all fucked up because I tumble dry it in the wash like an animal.
01:34:18.000 I look like a golf pro who's failed at everything, and his wife laughed like- John Daly's brother.
01:34:24.000 Yeah, yeah, I mean, but that's the look.
01:34:26.000 When you have the look, you just honor the look.
01:34:27.000 The IZOD look.
01:34:29.000 I remember when I was a kid, I had fake IZODs.
01:34:31.000 We couldn't afford an alligator.
01:34:33.000 Okay, so what was it?
01:34:34.000 An armadillo?
01:34:35.000 You have some bullshit thing that you buy from some stupid department store, and guys would glue an alligator over it.
01:34:43.000 Oh, really?
01:34:44.000 It's depressing.
01:34:45.000 Oh, that's rough.
01:34:46.000 They would fake it.
01:34:47.000 You made it out.
01:34:51.000 But it's so funny.
01:34:52.000 You figured it out.
01:34:54.000 Labels to kids are a big deal.
01:34:55.000 If you have off-brand sneakers on.
01:34:57.000 One summer, I saved up for a Versace shirt, and I bought this Versace shirt.
01:35:02.000 It was like this weird mesh material that clinks to your body.
01:35:05.000 Now, we can imagine there were many problems with that, right?
01:35:08.000 Because Versace has European cuck clothes.
01:35:11.000 Now, even if I, you know, were a small- Cuck clothes?
01:35:13.000 Cuck clothes.
01:35:14.000 No, cut, cut.
01:35:15.000 They're European cuck.
01:35:16.000 They're for dudes with, like, small shoulders.
01:35:18.000 You know the- You see Dolce& Gabbana, like, they're just- They're women- So I bought this Versace shirt, which was like blue and mesh, and it was just a night.
01:35:27.000 I mean, I look like Grover or something, like Cookie Monster walking around.
01:35:31.000 And then I just spilled something on it, and then I realized like designer clothes, you can't ever spill anything on it ever, or you have to like throw it out.
01:35:39.000 Like those types of material, it just doesn't work.
01:35:41.000 And I'm like, oh, the people that wear these don't eat, or when they eat, they don't eat in a way that gets things on them.
01:35:47.000 Or when they get things dirty, they just throw them away.
01:35:49.000 Throw them out and get another one.
01:35:50.000 They're crazy.
01:35:51.000 I've never been into fashion.
01:35:53.000 Yeah, I never have either, but I have been fascinated by the whole Paris fashion show runway culture.
01:36:00.000 Me too.
01:36:00.000 It's interesting.
01:36:00.000 To the point where I've actually, I remember when Kanye West was getting into that, and he was making his stuff and have people wear it on runways.
01:36:06.000 I almost want to be there to see what one of those things are like, because I bet some of the people there are probably so preposterous Yeah.
01:36:14.000 It's so weird.
01:36:15.000 Well, that's like going out to dinner in LA. You see these people walking into these restaurants and it's kind of hilarious.
01:36:19.000 You're like, these people are like a meme.
01:36:23.000 I mean, like they're not even real.
01:36:24.000 I'm like, oh my God.
01:36:25.000 So that's what Fashion Week is like.
01:36:27.000 I think it's an entire business built on bullshit.
01:36:29.000 Yes.
01:36:30.000 It's like an entire business built on like, what do you think?
01:36:33.000 And like buzz and all this crap.
01:36:34.000 Like there's nothing real about it other than what's created.
01:36:38.000 Our business is kind of like that too, where it's like, there's no nuts and bolts and it's all pretty much like, where's popular sentiment going?
01:36:47.000 How much can we affect it?
01:36:48.000 How much can we direct it?
01:36:49.000 And then there's, you know, eight year olds in Pakistan that make all the clothes.
01:36:53.000 Yes.
01:36:54.000 Yes.
01:36:55.000 All these things.
01:36:56.000 Which is sad, but they need to work.
01:37:01.000 I mean, we see what happens when you shut down a country and nobody works.
01:37:03.000 Do we want eight-year-old Pakistanis in Antifa?
01:37:05.000 No.
01:37:06.000 Work.
01:37:06.000 I wonder what's going to happen with American manufacturing.
01:37:09.000 I wonder if there's going to be a real shift, recognizing what a huge problem it is, having all our medicine made in China.
01:37:15.000 There's not a single phone that's made here.
01:37:17.000 Not a fucking phone.
01:37:18.000 Not a single one, yeah.
01:37:19.000 Not a single one.
01:37:19.000 Everybody has a phone.
01:37:20.000 There's millions of phones.
01:37:21.000 I wonder if this makes us rethink all of that, and that we gotta be more.
01:37:24.000 I mean, that would make sense, right?
01:37:25.000 Because 90% of our antibiotics are made in China.
01:37:28.000 Yeah, most of our medication.
01:37:29.000 That's crazy.
01:37:30.000 That's one of the things that I thought was very interesting about Trump, was that he was like, you know, listen, we're getting fucked by China.
01:37:36.000 They're fucking us.
01:37:37.000 And he was right.
01:37:37.000 He was right, but it's just, when he's right about things, those things become wrong.
01:37:43.000 Because people don't like him.
01:37:44.000 That's what I was saying about the politicalization, whether that's a word or not, of hydroxychloroquine.
01:37:49.000 When Schaub got the COVID, the doctor asked him what his political leanings are.
01:37:55.000 He's like, what?
01:37:55.000 He's like, a lot of people don't want to take hydroxychloroquine because of Trump.
01:37:59.000 Yeah.
01:38:00.000 And he's like, is that what I should take?
01:38:01.000 He goes, yes.
01:38:02.000 Shobb's getting nervous.
01:38:03.000 He thinks it's like a history test.
01:38:04.000 They're like, where do you stand on imperialism?
01:38:06.000 Shobb's like, wait, what?
01:38:07.000 He was baffled.
01:38:07.000 I'm just coughing.
01:38:08.000 He was like, what are you talking about?
01:38:09.000 Give me the fucking medication that works.
01:38:11.000 It's crazy.
01:38:12.000 There was a doctor.
01:38:14.000 What was that?
01:38:15.000 If any doctor says this helps, anybody that doesn't want to take it, to me, is crazy.
01:38:19.000 But it's a strange one in that so many people are against it, but it's like...
01:38:23.000 Hold on a second.
01:38:25.000 There's an article.
01:38:27.000 What was that article that I pulled up really recently about...
01:38:31.000 Oh, here it is.
01:38:32.000 The key to defeating COVID-19 already exists.
01:38:35.000 We need to start using it.
01:38:36.000 This is a doctor who is a legitimate scientist.
01:38:42.000 Right.
01:38:43.000 And they're trying to figure out, like, why is this guy's a professor of epidemiology from Yale School of Public Health?
01:38:52.000 He's not full of shit.
01:38:54.000 He's not full of shit.
01:38:55.000 And he's saying, listen, there's real evidence to show that, particularly in the early stages of this disease, it stops the virus from spreading.
01:39:02.000 It's a malaria disease that's been used forever.
01:39:05.000 New York told me that it was like the Lazarus drug, like people just getting up and walking out of the hot, like people literally that came in with it, if they used it early enough, it was really good.
01:39:13.000 Right, but then you hear these studies where people are saying, no, in fact, more people died when they're on it.
01:39:18.000 Like, well, what the fuck is true?
01:39:20.000 What is real?
01:39:21.000 Yeah, I mean, that's when you just have to kind of clock out and you go, let's figure it out.
01:39:25.000 Well, is it different stages of the disease where it's not effective?
01:39:30.000 Is it old people it doesn't work on, but it works on young people?
01:39:34.000 What are the studies?
01:39:35.000 How are you doing the studies?
01:39:37.000 Who's doing the studies?
01:39:38.000 I mean, it's all very difficult.
01:39:40.000 Have you done anything different in terms of taking care of yourself other than moving to the desert?
01:39:44.000 I take vitamin D. How much?
01:39:45.000 I take vitamin D. I think 5,000 I use a day.
01:39:47.000 That's right.
01:39:48.000 I take vitamin D. I started smoking because the cigarettes they said help.
01:39:56.000 I'm kidding.
01:39:57.000 Every now and then I have one cigarette, but I don't smoke.
01:40:01.000 Every now and then, at night, it's a relaxing thing once in a while.
01:40:07.000 Not all the time.
01:40:08.000 Do you smoke cigars?
01:40:09.000 No, I should.
01:40:10.000 Do you want one right now?
01:40:12.000 No, not really.
01:40:13.000 I appreciate it, though.
01:40:14.000 I should start.
01:40:15.000 I got a whole box of them.
01:40:16.000 Mike Binder gave me a whole box.
01:40:16.000 I know.
01:40:16.000 I don't need another habit.
01:40:18.000 You're very good.
01:40:18.000 I just start smoking cigars.
01:40:19.000 You don't have to smoke cigars all the time.
01:40:21.000 I know.
01:40:21.000 I have an addictive personality, so whatever I do, I tend to do it a lot.
01:40:25.000 Guess what?
01:40:26.000 Me too.
01:40:26.000 That's the problem.
01:40:27.000 That's the problem.
01:40:27.000 That's why I got good at comedy.
01:40:29.000 Diaz talks about it.
01:40:30.000 Yeah.
01:40:30.000 Got addicted to that.
01:40:32.000 You know, that's the whole thing.
01:40:33.000 You end up getting addicted to...
01:40:36.000 Something.
01:40:37.000 So you better make sure that it's something good.
01:40:38.000 But I've been trying to do better things and, you know, swimming a lot, working out, things like that.
01:40:44.000 Well, have you ever talked, like, when evolutionary biologists talk about addictive personalities and obsessive personalities, obsessive behavior, and they say that you're actually, this is very controversial, but they think, some of them think, that you're actually tapping into a trait that would make you get very successful at things like hunting.
01:41:01.000 For survival.
01:41:03.000 Like you get obsessed at something, so you want to perfect it, you're obsessed by it, so you become better at it, so you become more successful, so you survive because you have food.
01:41:12.000 Interesting.
01:41:12.000 Yeah, which makes sense.
01:41:13.000 Or war, or combat, or things where you're going to be able to figure out how to defend yourself.
01:41:16.000 So that's like a primordial trait that a lot of us have.
01:41:19.000 And he gets hijacked by heroin.
01:41:21.000 Right.
01:41:23.000 It gets hijacked by gambling.
01:41:24.000 It gets hijacked by something horrible.
01:41:26.000 It gets hijacked by jerking off.
01:41:27.000 Yeah.
01:41:27.000 Wow.
01:41:28.000 That's what it is.
01:41:29.000 Wow.
01:41:29.000 So you would have been a hunter.
01:41:31.000 Mm-hmm.
01:41:31.000 Yeah.
01:41:32.000 Listen, it makes 100% sense.
01:41:33.000 It does.
01:41:34.000 It does.
01:41:35.000 I mean, it's just, it's crazy.
01:41:36.000 It's like in the modern world, that trait becomes sometimes a liability.
01:41:41.000 Well, in the modern world, there's so many, like the modern world is not natural.
01:41:45.000 Not at all.
01:41:45.000 Every fucking thing that we do is very recent.
01:41:48.000 Offices are so unnatural, like the way we sit.
01:41:51.000 Everything.
01:41:51.000 Yeah.
01:41:52.000 Yeah.
01:41:52.000 What we do for a living has only been around for a hundred years.
01:41:55.000 Not even a hundred years.
01:41:56.000 Right.
01:41:57.000 When was the first stand-up?
01:41:58.000 I think it was the mafia started putting these nightclubs together after, like, vaudeville.
01:42:03.000 Like, it was started those type of acts.
01:42:04.000 They started putting a brick wall up.
01:42:06.000 Yeah.
01:42:06.000 But I think that was, you know, it's all very recent.
01:42:09.000 It's in the last century.
01:42:10.000 Yeah, in the last century.
01:42:11.000 A hundred percent.
01:42:12.000 And guys like us would have been the emcee.
01:42:14.000 And it would have been like a fucking go-go dancer and a guy playing the drums.
01:42:19.000 Yeah, that's all that shit.
01:42:20.000 We're descendant of tent carnivals and circuses.
01:42:25.000 It is crazy that one of the most prominent art forms in the world, which is stand-up comedy, is literally within the last hundred years.
01:42:33.000 Yeah, but a lot of things, you know, yeah.
01:42:36.000 But like music, acting, poetry, literature.
01:42:38.000 Well, you'd have to look at the predecessors too.
01:42:40.000 Like there was probably in the Middle Ages, there was a court jester, right?
01:42:44.000 So there's always been somebody goofing around and being funny.
01:42:47.000 Sometimes they did comedic plays.
01:42:50.000 There had to be a guy in the town square yelling and screaming.
01:42:54.000 Storytellers.
01:42:54.000 And podcasting is like, we're essentially, it's like, other than being a whore, a hooker, it's like the oldest profession, because we're just talking.
01:43:02.000 Sort of, but we're doing it in a new way, where people are doing other things, and they're getting entertained while they're doing other things.
01:43:08.000 It's true.
01:43:08.000 Like, right now, while you and I are yucking it up, there's a guy who's running around a lake.
01:43:11.000 Right.
01:43:12.000 And he's out there laughing his ass off, sweating, and it distracts you.
01:43:15.000 And it distracts him.
01:43:15.000 He looks down at his watch, holy shit, like it's six miles.
01:43:18.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:43:19.000 It's true.
01:43:19.000 Yeah.
01:43:20.000 Yeah.
01:43:20.000 But it's just simple.
01:43:22.000 Recording things change a lot of that because musicians change too because everything would have had to have been 100% live performance.
01:43:28.000 Sure.
01:43:29.000 If you play guitar or harp or violin, whatever the fuck it would have been.
01:43:32.000 Well, that's what I miss.
01:43:33.000 Good point.
01:43:33.000 I miss.
01:43:34.000 I love podcasting and I get to do it.
01:43:37.000 But I do miss the live experience.
01:43:39.000 Oh, yeah.
01:43:41.000 Because everything has context live.
01:43:43.000 Yeah.
01:43:44.000 Twitter, all these things have no context.
01:43:45.000 When I did the Houston Improv, which is the only date that I did over the last few months, it was like I felt like I was getting away with something.
01:43:53.000 And then I realized I kind of have almost like a low-key depression from not doing stand-up.
01:43:59.000 It's not bad, but it's like this is what it is.
01:44:02.000 And this is, I hate to tell you all, you folks out there, regular people who do not kill, if you do not go on stage and kill, you do not know what that feels like.
01:44:11.000 It's a high.
01:44:11.000 It is not just a high, it is one of the biggest highs in all of show business.
01:44:15.000 It's life affirming.
01:44:15.000 When you and I would do the main room at the fucking store and you get off stage and murder- It's great.
01:44:21.000 And you would hand it off to me.
01:44:22.000 Nothing's better.
01:44:23.000 Oh my god, man.
01:44:24.000 Nothing's better.
01:44:25.000 It's like the feeling.
01:44:25.000 And there's a feeling that I remember going on stage when someone was coming off.
01:44:30.000 They would introduce you and they would just crush.
01:44:31.000 And you looked at their face and you got to see a face of a person just crushed.
01:44:36.000 Right.
01:44:37.000 And I would always say this.
01:44:39.000 I feel bad for people who don't know what it's like to crush.
01:44:42.000 Yeah.
01:44:43.000 Well, it's also like, you look at actors and you go, how fun could that be?
01:44:47.000 It's fun.
01:44:48.000 I'm sure it is.
01:44:49.000 But it can't be anywhere near as fun.
01:44:51.000 No.
01:44:52.000 Can't be anywhere near as fun.
01:44:53.000 Just in the raw, visceral reaction of people.
01:44:56.000 Like Greg Giraldo always used to say, like, it's that visceral, you know, feeling.
01:45:01.000 It's not so much...
01:45:02.000 It's not like you're getting love, but it's like you're just this...
01:45:05.000 It's like this weird, almost...
01:45:08.000 Like God-like experience you're having in terms of like being able to take a room full of 300 people and bring them with you on a journey.
01:45:16.000 Yes.
01:45:17.000 And take them from where they are to a place where they're hysterically laughing.
01:45:21.000 It's like a chemical reaction to change people's...
01:45:25.000 I mean, that's why I'm going to go do it in a tent.
01:45:27.000 You're giving them a drug.
01:45:28.000 It's like, yeah.
01:45:29.000 You're giving him a drug.
01:45:29.000 Yeah, and I'm not going to do a lot of those shows, but I said, I'll do one.
01:45:32.000 Let me see what it's like.
01:45:33.000 I'm curious as to what it's like, and I've shit on them, and I still may after I do it, but I want to see what it's like to just do it in the circumstances it can be done right now.
01:45:47.000 Are you going to do one with Bert, those drive-in things you were talking about doing those?
01:45:49.000 That I'm not going to do.
01:45:51.000 LAUGHTER I love him, but I don't want to entertain cars.
01:45:56.000 You sit people in a parking lot, I'm cool.
01:45:59.000 When I start performing at Dodge Durangos, and listen, God bless him.
01:46:03.000 He's got a huge fan base.
01:46:04.000 A lot of people are doing it.
01:46:05.000 I think Gaffigan did it.
01:46:09.000 I feel like that's way too disconnected.
01:46:11.000 For me, this is all personal, right?
01:46:14.000 I love podcasting.
01:46:16.000 I try to be as funny as I can.
01:46:18.000 I do these crazy rants.
01:46:19.000 And that gets a little bit out that I need to get out.
01:46:22.000 I would rather do that than perform in front of cars.
01:46:25.000 Yeah.
01:46:26.000 I don't know, man.
01:46:27.000 I think I'm going to try the car thing once.
01:46:28.000 But maybe I'm wrong.
01:46:29.000 I'll try the car thing once.
01:46:30.000 You've got to try it all once.
01:46:31.000 But Burt's doing it all over the country.
01:46:33.000 He's basically on a drive-through tour.
01:46:34.000 What I love about Burt, Burt was like, they were like, we're shutting down comedy.
01:46:37.000 He's like, no, we're not.
01:46:39.000 Yeah, and Burt's like, we're not.
01:46:40.000 Yeah, he just got shuffled out there.
01:46:42.000 But it's also, you know, the thing about COVID, it does give you an opportunity, if you're a comic, to sort of sit down and rethink things.
01:46:50.000 And also to really appreciate what it's like to do stand-up again.
01:46:55.000 Yeah, that's true.
01:46:56.000 When we did that weekend in Houston, I did it with Moses and Hinchcliffe, and when we came back, we were like, man, I missed that.
01:47:04.000 Yeah.
01:47:04.000 My God, that was fun.
01:47:05.000 Yeah.
01:47:06.000 Yeah, I mean, I know that I'm walking into a situation where I might get off stage and go, oh, fuck this forever.
01:47:11.000 Because it's a rough...
01:47:12.000 You know, it's going to be different.
01:47:14.000 It's not a cloud.
01:47:14.000 They're going to be thankful, though.
01:47:15.000 But I'm going to be thankful.
01:47:16.000 We're going to have a lot of fun.
01:47:17.000 They're going to be thankful.
01:47:18.000 I mean, the ticket's sold immediately.
01:47:20.000 We're putting more shows on.
01:47:21.000 And then it's my home from Long Island.
01:47:24.000 So I'm going to have a lot of fun there with the people that come out.
01:47:28.000 And I think because it's going to be a really great place to ease back in because I'm going to be able to do some material, go off the top of my head, know that the crowd has a lot of shared experiences with me because we all grew up in the same place.
01:47:40.000 It's kind of a training wheels to kind of come back in and then hopefully I'm hoping by this winter we're kind of start revving up again.
01:47:52.000 Because we can't...
01:47:53.000 I mean, what are we going to do?
01:47:54.000 Well, what do we do if COVID is like this next August?
01:47:58.000 If we're all the way to next August and it's still like this?
01:48:01.000 Did you just go on the road again?
01:48:02.000 I think it is a certain time we're going to have to make that distinction because, like...
01:48:08.000 At the end of the day, how does the economy survive?
01:48:10.000 How does the country survive without these things?
01:48:14.000 I mean, sports is a mental...
01:48:16.000 People need sports.
01:48:17.000 They need to participate.
01:48:20.000 They need to watch sport.
01:48:21.000 You can't take all of this away forever.
01:48:24.000 I mean, there's all these freaks.
01:48:26.000 Listen, I get the people without the masks that are coughing in elderly people's faces.
01:48:30.000 No good.
01:48:31.000 But on the other side, you have these people that are these weird...
01:48:35.000 Cat moms that are like wine drunk, baking bread on Instagram.
01:48:39.000 It's like, honey, we can't do this for 10 years.
01:48:43.000 I know you're happy because you're this weird freak that doesn't like leaving anyway.
01:48:46.000 People need to fucking leave their homes.
01:48:49.000 Yeah, they need to leave their homes and there's not a lot of entertainment coming down the pipe either.
01:48:53.000 Not a lot of movies being made.
01:48:54.000 No!
01:48:55.000 Not a lot of ways to entertain yourself.
01:48:56.000 And these studios are trying to figure out ways to film these movies and keep people safe, but it's hard, man.
01:49:03.000 Yeah.
01:49:03.000 They got to quarantine everybody and put them in hotels.
01:49:06.000 It's difficult.
01:49:09.000 But that's why I think eventually, you know, New York's COVID rates are very low.
01:49:14.000 I think that it's going to blow through.
01:49:16.000 I think there might be a little second wave, but I think eventually the viruses weaken.
01:49:21.000 They weaken and they disappear.
01:49:23.000 It happened in 1918 with the Spanish flu.
01:49:25.000 They weaken and this will weaken.
01:49:27.000 Isn't that weird?
01:49:27.000 Yeah.
01:49:28.000 Why does the virus weaken?
01:49:29.000 Well, you know, I'm an epidemiologist, and what you see is a lot of times the virus is just, it goes into the hosts, and then eventually the virus is like, eh.
01:49:40.000 Like, what causes it?
01:49:41.000 Is it the people that have- I think it just runs through.
01:49:43.000 It's just like, picture somebody that just fucks everybody, that they've just ran through everybody.
01:49:48.000 They move to the next town.
01:49:50.000 Right?
01:49:51.000 You just fuck everybody, and then you're like, what am I going to do?
01:49:54.000 And then if you fuck like 30 people, by the time you fuck the 31st person, you barely have a hard-on.
01:49:58.000 You're blowing out dust!
01:49:58.000 Yeah, you're going to have a hard-on.
01:49:59.000 So I think this virus just, I mean, I don't know.
01:50:02.000 I don't know exactly how it happens, but it does historically happen.
01:50:05.000 It's happened.
01:50:05.000 Yeah, historically.
01:50:07.000 This is a different kind of disease, though.
01:50:10.000 I think the big problem is the bigger issue actually now is economic, even though COVID's a massive issue.
01:50:15.000 I think the bigger issue is how are we going to stop 28 million people from being evicted or foreclosed on because they couldn't go to jobs?
01:50:23.000 The government literally shut down the economy.
01:50:24.000 These people could not work.
01:50:25.000 So through no fault of their own, they have a real problem here.
01:50:29.000 There's a real housing issue.
01:50:31.000 Not just that.
01:50:31.000 How about the businesses that are closed down?
01:50:33.000 How do you restart a business when you have no money?
01:50:34.000 Correct.
01:50:35.000 What do you do?
01:50:36.000 How do you get going?
01:50:36.000 And does the government have money to give these people loans to get started again?
01:50:40.000 I mean, I think they have to do something, whether it's universal basic income.
01:50:43.000 I don't know what they're going to do, but that economic issue is going to be really, really massive.
01:50:49.000 It's so fucking anxiety filled.
01:50:52.000 It is.
01:50:52.000 It's like, how does this end?
01:50:55.000 It's a great movie.
01:50:56.000 In Texas.
01:50:57.000 That's where it ends.
01:50:58.000 It just ends in Texas that we all have guns and we all just sit on our porches all day waiting for someone to come near us.
01:51:03.000 How often have you shot a gun?
01:51:05.000 A few times, like upstate New York.
01:51:08.000 I should, I mean, I don't have a gun.
01:51:09.000 I should get a gun.
01:51:09.000 I didn't think I'd need a gun when I moved to LA. I didn't think I'd have to sit on my balcony with a gun.
01:51:15.000 You know, it seemed relatively safe when I moved in.
01:51:17.000 People were annoying, but I didn't think they were coming to kill me.
01:51:20.000 I didn't think they were coming in my windows to kill me.
01:51:21.000 But now that I'm like, yeah, I should get a gun.
01:51:25.000 I think I texted you a second week of quarantine.
01:51:26.000 I'm like, should I get a gun?
01:51:27.000 You're like, yeah.
01:51:28.000 You're one of them.
01:51:29.000 You're one of my liberal friends.
01:51:30.000 I'm not a liberal friend, but I was like...
01:51:33.000 Are you a centrist?
01:51:34.000 I believe in pedophile cults and lizard people.
01:51:37.000 I think that's centrist.
01:51:38.000 I think that's in the center.
01:51:40.000 Oh.
01:51:40.000 I'm on the fence with lizard people, but the pedophile cults are real.
01:51:43.000 They're all real.
01:51:44.000 I just don't care.
01:51:45.000 I don't care.
01:51:47.000 That's really my political option.
01:51:48.000 It's like, I think most of it isn't real.
01:51:53.000 You're making a lot of it real.
01:51:54.000 It's not real.
01:51:56.000 Walk away.
01:51:58.000 Like, it truly...
01:51:59.000 People that are real activists...
01:52:04.000 A lot of them have like a degree, like they're a lawyer or a doctor, and then they use their skills to actually help people.
01:52:11.000 Right.
01:52:11.000 And they give up really profitable careers to do that shit.
01:52:14.000 Right.
01:52:14.000 But dude, your Twitter fucking posturing and your virtue signaling doesn't do anything.
01:52:19.000 It's fake.
01:52:20.000 I know it's fake.
01:52:20.000 And there's just more to life than red and blue and Republican or Democrat and all these motherfuckers are trying to kill you and they're all fucking losers.
01:52:28.000 And they're all just...
01:52:29.000 I mean, listen...
01:52:30.000 They're more capable.
01:52:32.000 All the shit that they've pulled, the CIA, all these people, they're just too good.
01:52:37.000 They've beat me.
01:52:38.000 They're going to win.
01:52:39.000 They're going to win.
01:52:40.000 The CIA is going to beat you.
01:52:41.000 Maybe you should join.
01:52:42.000 I don't know who needs to hear it.
01:52:43.000 I'd love to, but I don't know who needs to hear this.
01:52:45.000 But stop investing all your emotions and your time and energy into this thing.
01:52:52.000 You would be so much better off if you just found something you enjoyed and did it.
01:52:56.000 Right, but you don't want them taking away your rights and closing in on your email account.
01:53:02.000 They're gonna do it!
01:53:02.000 They're gonna do it anyway!
01:53:04.000 Are they?
01:53:04.000 Are you sure?
01:53:05.000 What are you gonna do?
01:53:06.000 Don't take my rights!
01:53:08.000 Send!
01:53:08.000 It doesn't fucking matter!
01:53:10.000 They're gonna take them!
01:53:11.000 Buy the gun!
01:53:12.000 Do whatever you gotta do!
01:53:13.000 Like, there's no winning here!
01:53:16.000 Do you believe in a well-armed militia?
01:53:17.000 Think that's necessary?
01:53:20.000 Yeah, I'm all for people having guns.
01:53:23.000 But a militia.
01:53:24.000 It seems like more now than ever, the idea of forming a militia is in people's minds.
01:53:30.000 It's gonna happen.
01:53:30.000 It'll happen.
01:53:31.000 There'll be skirmishes.
01:53:32.000 There'll be violence in the street.
01:53:33.000 That's what I was most worried about with Portland and Seattle.
01:53:36.000 Yeah, at the end of the day, you know, I mean, I don't know.
01:53:40.000 You know, this country is not designed for massive reimagining.
01:53:43.000 That's sad to say.
01:53:44.000 I can say it.
01:53:45.000 I'm a comedian.
01:53:45.000 It is what it is.
01:53:46.000 But the reality is it's just not.
01:53:48.000 It's going to disintegrate like everything else that's ever fucking existed on the planet.
01:53:53.000 And you just hope that the plane lands slowly and doesn't nosedive into the ground.
01:53:58.000 But the best days are over here.
01:54:00.000 The hopeful, you know, we're going to the moon.
01:54:04.000 That's done.
01:54:05.000 Really?
01:54:05.000 Yeah.
01:54:06.000 You don't think so?
01:54:07.000 I think we could be in a little bit of a blip and we'd make a nice resurgence and in a year and a half from now everything's looking good.
01:54:13.000 I don't know.
01:54:14.000 I think we just head into a dystopian, insane kind of like tech world where we just all live on, like reality barely exists.
01:54:21.000 That's a real problem.
01:54:22.000 It's a dystopian world we're heading into.
01:54:24.000 Well the real problem is if everything goes into like a Ready Player One type situation where whatever they manufacture on a computer with artificial reality is more interesting.
01:54:35.000 That's going to happen.
01:54:36.000 And listen, here's the problem.
01:54:38.000 Most people don't care.
01:54:40.000 They don't want these rights.
01:54:41.000 They actually don't.
01:54:42.000 You like them because you're like a successful person.
01:54:45.000 Most people don't give a shit about their rights.
01:54:47.000 They want pizza.
01:54:48.000 They want chicken wings.
01:54:50.000 They want fucking soda.
01:54:51.000 They want cheap credit.
01:54:53.000 They want to go on a cruise once a year.
01:54:55.000 They don't give a shit about their rights.
01:54:57.000 They don't care.
01:54:58.000 They want Netflix and they want, you know, garlic knots.
01:55:01.000 And that's what it is.
01:55:04.000 And you could pretend...
01:55:05.000 America's just not a country of freedom-loving.
01:55:08.000 There's a few of those people.
01:55:09.000 Most people are just like, hey, whatever.
01:55:11.000 And they're the happiest people.
01:55:13.000 A lot of those people I'm talking about are actually the happier people.
01:55:16.000 They're not trying to build an empire.
01:55:18.000 They're not trying to succeed.
01:55:19.000 They just enjoy putting something warm and doughy in their mouth, vegging out, and fucking waking up the next day and go, shit, I'm here again.
01:55:27.000 And they're the happiest people.
01:55:29.000 They like to get drunk and go boating.
01:55:30.000 That's it.
01:55:31.000 They like to get fucked up and go out on the lake.
01:55:33.000 Go out on the lake and get railed up.
01:55:36.000 And it's fun.
01:55:38.000 What, are you going to sit around all day and worry about what DARPA's doing?
01:55:41.000 It's like, what kind of life is that?
01:55:44.000 Grill a burger, it's over!
01:55:46.000 I mean, enjoy it!
01:55:47.000 It's the end, and the end's not that bad.
01:55:51.000 As ends go, this end happens to be hilarious, and there's still food in the food stores.
01:55:59.000 Yeah, that's a good point.
01:56:00.000 As of right now.
01:56:01.000 I like your optimism.
01:56:02.000 This is a good end.
01:56:03.000 It's not a bad end.
01:56:05.000 It's not the worst end.
01:56:06.000 I want to see what happens when Joe Biden gets into office.
01:56:10.000 He's going to sleep a lot.
01:56:11.000 He'll nap a lot.
01:56:12.000 I want to see what the speeches are like when he forgets what he's talking about.
01:56:15.000 He's going to have no clue.
01:56:16.000 Kamala, he'll run for a term, he'll live for a term.
01:56:21.000 It's Kamala, and if you pronounce it wrong, you're racist.
01:56:24.000 I call her K-Dawg.
01:56:26.000 No, she's gonna run, he'll do one term, and then she'll run.
01:56:30.000 I don't think he'll run for a second term.
01:56:31.000 He's already too old.
01:56:33.000 He'll do one term, she'll come in again, no one will care about politics, she'll be yass-queening all over the place.
01:56:38.000 If he does run for a second term, he'll be in his 80s.
01:56:42.000 He's not going to run for a second term.
01:56:43.000 She'll run.
01:56:44.000 She knows that.
01:56:45.000 That's why she's pumped.
01:56:46.000 But do you think they have to think that through when they run for president?
01:56:49.000 Like if you're 78 and you're barely hanging on now.
01:56:52.000 It's probably unspoken, but I think that that's probably...
01:56:55.000 I think why he picked her is because she's...
01:56:58.000 Young and vital.
01:56:59.000 Yeah.
01:56:59.000 Everybody's kind of comfortable with her.
01:57:01.000 She's a centrist.
01:57:02.000 She's a cop.
01:57:03.000 She doesn't care.
01:57:04.000 She'll put you right in jail.
01:57:05.000 She'll put the cuffs on you.
01:57:06.000 The government, the larger power centers are very happy with her.
01:57:10.000 She'll throw them in the vans.
01:57:11.000 She'll brand you.
01:57:12.000 They love it.
01:57:13.000 So if she runs, who's her VP? God only knows.
01:57:16.000 I mean, someone else that shares her values, which are...
01:57:18.000 Here it is.
01:57:18.000 ...aesthetic politics and a lot of prison.
01:57:20.000 ...requiring all Americans to wear masks.
01:57:23.000 Three months, he says.
01:57:24.000 For three months.
01:57:25.000 Yeah.
01:57:25.000 He was joined at briefing by his newly named running mate.
01:57:28.000 Mmm.
01:57:28.000 Let me hear it.
01:57:30.000 I don't know about it.
01:57:30.000 It's weird.
01:57:31.000 That's a long speech, it says.
01:57:32.000 I want to hear some of it, Joe.
01:57:34.000 I just want to hear his voice.
01:57:35.000 Okay.
01:57:35.000 Here it goes.
01:57:36.000 Give me some.
01:57:37.000 When one arrives...
01:57:39.000 And what plans are being made for.
01:57:41.000 We talked significantly about the racial disparities that exist and how COVID-19 is affecting different races differently.
01:57:52.000 And we talked about the continued lack of PPE, protective equipment, and testing capacity and the like.
01:58:02.000 And I've put out a comprehensive plan over the last three months on each of these things.
01:58:08.000 But today, I want to talk about one thing, very straightforward.
01:58:13.000 It doesn't have anything to do with Democrats, Republicans, or independents.
01:58:18.000 It has to do with a simple proposition.
01:58:22.000 Every single American.
01:58:25.000 Should be wearing a mask when they're outside.
01:58:29.000 What?
01:58:30.000 For the next three months at Menon.
01:58:33.000 Every governor should mandate.
01:58:36.000 Every governor should mandate mandatory mask wearing.
01:58:41.000 The estimates by the experts are it will save over 40,000 lives in the next three months.
01:58:49.000 40,000 lives.
01:58:52.000 The people act responsibly.
01:58:54.000 And it's not about your rights, it's about your responsibilities.
01:59:00.000 As an American.
01:59:00.000 That's a bad line.
01:59:02.000 It's not a great line.
01:59:03.000 I get what he's saying.
01:59:04.000 At least he got through that without stumbling.
01:59:06.000 He seems to be getting better.
01:59:08.000 They're injecting him with something when he's getting better.
01:59:11.000 Yeah, no, legit.
01:59:12.000 Something's happening.
01:59:12.000 Yeah, they got alpha brain on an IV drip.
01:59:14.000 Yeah.
01:59:14.000 Going right into his dick hole.
01:59:15.000 He's going slower now.
01:59:16.000 Because remember, you used to be fast, and you go, blah, blah, blah, blah.
01:59:19.000 Well, he does have a stutter.
01:59:21.000 He's always had a bit of an issue.
01:59:23.000 Here's the thing.
01:59:24.000 It's like, aren't we...
01:59:27.000 I don't know.
01:59:28.000 It's so depressing that these people rule us.
01:59:30.000 But then you also go, who even wants this fucking job?
01:59:33.000 And if you're really talented and you don't even want that job.
01:59:36.000 Who wants that fucking job?
01:59:38.000 I mean, look at this one.
01:59:39.000 She's Indian.
01:59:39.000 She's black.
01:59:40.000 She doesn't know what she is.
01:59:41.000 She's everything.
01:59:42.000 Best for their health, their well-being, and for their families.
01:59:46.000 That's what real leadership looks like.
01:59:50.000 And when Joe talks about his priorities, he knows and he cares about the fact that we have, as a nation, witnessed 165,000 people who just in the last few months have died in our country.
02:00:07.000 We know that those individuals represent families, loved ones, grandparents, parents, sisters and brothers, aunts and uncles.
02:00:15.000 Sisters.
02:00:15.000 Those are all people she could have put in jail.
02:00:19.000 She's so upset because we could have put handcuffs on all of those people.
02:00:22.000 They could have been out there fighting wildfires for a dollar an hour.
02:00:25.000 They could have been working for a Walmart for 10 cents an hour in the Kamala Harris prison program.
02:00:31.000 Yeah.
02:00:31.000 You know, what are you going to do?
02:00:33.000 It's just wild that these are our choices.
02:00:37.000 Trump.
02:00:38.000 Or this crew.
02:00:40.000 Or this old fella.
02:00:41.000 But that's what I mean.
02:00:42.000 It's like, this is kind of the beginning of the...
02:00:45.000 She makes sense to me as a vice president.
02:00:47.000 Yeah!
02:00:48.000 Get away from all the prison stuff.
02:00:50.000 She makes all the right people feel comfortable.
02:00:52.000 Yeah.
02:00:53.000 She makes all the right...
02:00:53.000 Like, all the people that need...
02:00:56.000 Somebody in there that will, you know...
02:00:58.000 Check the boxes.
02:00:59.000 Check all the boxes.
02:01:01.000 Who's that guy?
02:01:03.000 I don't like him.
02:01:06.000 Who is he?
02:01:09.000 I don't know.
02:01:10.000 What does Donald Trump say?
02:01:11.000 Oh, he's wearing a mask.
02:01:13.000 We unite in our effort to defeat invisible China virus.
02:01:19.000 And many people say that it is patriotic to wear a face mask when you can't socially distance.
02:01:25.000 There is nobody more patriotic than me, your favorite president.
02:01:28.000 Yeah, this is the end.
02:01:29.000 I mean, this is the end, Joe.
02:01:31.000 This is out of a movie.
02:01:33.000 You tweeted to Bill Maher today?
02:01:34.000 What did he say?
02:01:35.000 He went off on Bill Maher.
02:01:36.000 Oh, because Bill Maher did that thing about him.
02:01:37.000 He did a eulogy for him.
02:01:39.000 Did he?
02:01:39.000 Yeah, he said he wouldn't get a eulogy, so he gave him.
02:01:41.000 Trump was not happy about that.
02:01:43.000 Oh my God.
02:01:44.000 Did you see what he said to him?
02:01:46.000 That's so funny.
02:01:46.000 I didn't see that.
02:01:47.000 Yeah, I got it in here somewhere.
02:01:49.000 It's actually pretty funny.
02:01:53.000 It's just funny that he spent so much time thinking about this.
02:01:57.000 He goes, uh...
02:01:59.000 His ego is the thing, man.
02:02:01.000 That's the thing that really...
02:02:02.000 Watched Bill Maher last night for the first time in a long time.
02:02:05.000 He's totally shot, looks terrible, exhausted, gaunt, and weak.
02:02:11.000 If there was ever a good reason for no shutdown, check out this jerk.
02:02:16.000 He never had much going for him, but whatever he did have is missing in action.
02:02:24.000 Wow!
02:02:26.000 What a crazy tweet!
02:02:28.000 The suburban housewife will be voting for me.
02:02:31.000 They want safety and are thrilled that I ended the long-running program where low-income housing would invade their neighborhood.
02:02:39.000 Biden would reinstall it in a bigger form with Cory Booker in charge.
02:02:44.000 I mean, this is kind of just very race-baiting stuff, you know?
02:02:47.000 He's basically like this.
02:02:49.000 Yeah, I mean, this is real coded stuff, you know?
02:02:52.000 That's kind of ugly.
02:02:53.000 Is that what they call a dog whistle?
02:02:54.000 Yeah, it's a little ugly.
02:02:56.000 Dog whistle's a new thing.
02:02:57.000 Dog whistle's new, and a lot of the things they say dog whistles aren't.
02:03:00.000 They're just people are talking.
02:03:02.000 But when you say stuff like that, where you're like, invade, use words like that.
02:03:06.000 Low-income housing's invading your neighborhood.
02:03:08.000 You're kind of like housewives.
02:03:09.000 We know what you're doing here.
02:03:10.000 Yeah, the housewives, we know.
02:03:11.000 MS-13, climbing in a window, low-income housing.
02:03:15.000 But this is what he's doing.
02:03:18.000 Do you think he gets advised to say these things, or do you think these things are off the cuff?
02:03:21.000 No, I don't think anyone's advising him.
02:03:22.000 I think this is all him.
02:03:23.000 That's what's crazy, right?
02:03:24.000 He's a creature and a creation of all of the cultural trends that his supporters hate.
02:03:30.000 Which are Hollywood and Big Tech.
02:03:32.000 He is a creation of those two things.
02:03:34.000 One of the most wild things recently was the Bubba thing with the NASCAR, with the noose.
02:03:39.000 Yeah, the noose, yeah.
02:03:40.000 Like when he was saying that NASCAR screwing up the lowest ratings ever.
02:03:44.000 And first of all, they had the problem getting rid of the flag.
02:03:47.000 You mean the Confederate flag?
02:03:49.000 Yeah, the Confederate flag.
02:03:50.000 Not only that, the ratings aren't low.
02:03:51.000 Yeah.
02:03:52.000 How about what he said to the Fox News anchor when they go, well, who's done more for black people than me?
02:03:57.000 And they were like, Lincoln?
02:03:58.000 And he's like, well, that's debatable.
02:03:59.000 Yeah.
02:03:59.000 And then she goes, well, we're free, Mr. President.
02:04:01.000 He goes, yeah, you're free.
02:04:02.000 Like, that's wild.
02:04:04.000 That's wild.
02:04:05.000 It's just wild.
02:04:06.000 It's a problem.
02:04:07.000 He's off the cuff.
02:04:08.000 He's not thinking.
02:04:09.000 Off the cuff.
02:04:09.000 But even off the cuff, this is really, yeah.
02:04:12.000 It's a narcissist on a level that no one's really ever seen that before in public life at this level.
02:04:18.000 And he's the worst guy in a crisis.
02:04:21.000 This is the worst guy.
02:04:23.000 You wouldn't want a guy leading a Boy Scout troop in a hurricane during this.
02:04:26.000 This is a guy that just belittles people, vindictive, blames people.
02:04:31.000 He doesn't take responsibility for anything.
02:04:33.000 There's a smallness to him.
02:04:34.000 And it's all very funny.
02:04:36.000 It's all hilarious.
02:04:37.000 But when you talk about leading an organization, there's probably a lot of issues.
02:04:40.000 There's a lot of issues.
02:04:42.000 Look at that.
02:04:43.000 The hair.
02:04:43.000 His hair is wild, man.
02:04:45.000 I kind of respect his hair.
02:04:46.000 Shower rules to be eased after Trump hair complaints.
02:04:49.000 What?
02:04:50.000 I don't even know what that means.
02:04:51.000 What does that mean?
02:04:52.000 Talking about how much water comes out of a shower head and then dishwashers and shit.
02:04:56.000 People make fun of him for that.
02:04:57.000 Why doesn't he shave his head?
02:04:59.000 He'd look great.
02:05:00.000 He'd be free.
02:05:02.000 That hair is so much of his thing, dude.
02:05:03.000 It's chaos.
02:05:04.000 Yeah, it's chaos.
02:05:05.000 Exactly.
02:05:06.000 The hair is like his brain itself.
02:05:08.000 Oh, so shower heads, you can't take a shower.
02:05:11.000 The water doesn't come out.
02:05:12.000 You want to wash your hands, the water doesn't come out.
02:05:14.000 So what do you do?
02:05:15.000 You just stand there longer and you take a shower longer because my hair, I don't know about you, but it has to be perfect.
02:05:21.000 Perfect, he says.
02:05:22.000 Perfect.
02:05:23.000 Because my hair, I don't know about you, but it has to be perfect.
02:05:28.000 Perfect.
02:05:28.000 That's madness.
02:05:29.000 Yeah.
02:05:30.000 Well, that's what he should be focusing on right now.
02:05:32.000 That's so crazy.
02:05:33.000 His hair.
02:05:34.000 He should be focusing on the hair and Bill Maher show.
02:05:36.000 Bill Maher looking gaunt.
02:05:38.000 Yeah, Bill Maher looking gaunt.
02:05:40.000 I mean, it'll be interesting to see these debates.
02:05:43.000 Are they going to have debates?
02:05:44.000 They're going to have some version.
02:05:46.000 I think Kamala is going to be like, I got this.
02:05:49.000 She's going to be good with Pence.
02:05:50.000 She's pretty good.
02:05:52.000 But him and Biden are going to be very interesting.
02:05:55.000 But I don't know how many people are going to watch.
02:05:56.000 I mean, I think a lot of people will watch, depending on the format.
02:05:59.000 I wonder how many they'll actually have.
02:06:01.000 I mean, they're not going to be able to be in the same room the way they used to be.
02:06:04.000 Remember when the Hillary thing was going on where he was circling behind her?
02:06:07.000 Yeah.
02:06:07.000 It was creepy.
02:06:08.000 Wild.
02:06:08.000 And then you remember the thing where he brought the five women to the debate to accuse Bill Clinton?
02:06:13.000 He's live right now and there's 72 people watching it.
02:06:16.000 No.
02:06:17.000 This is the White House's...
02:06:18.000 72 likes?
02:06:20.000 No, it can't be 72 people.
02:06:22.000 That's what that means.
02:06:23.000 That's YouTube suppressing their views.
02:06:25.000 This is their...
02:06:25.000 Not YouTube.
02:06:26.000 This is Periscope.
02:06:27.000 Can't be real.
02:06:27.000 Can't be real.
02:06:28.000 This is the White House's Twitter.
02:06:29.000 Well, why don't you click on it again and see if it makes 73?
02:06:32.000 Refresh your browser.
02:06:35.000 Jamie's part of the problem.
02:06:36.000 You're part of the problem, Jamie.
02:06:38.000 Deep state.
02:06:38.000 I want to hear what he's saying.
02:06:39.000 Let's hear what he's saying.
02:06:42.000 What's he got?
02:06:44.000 You know, 500,000 applications coming in, going all over the state.
02:06:48.000 Nobody even knows where they came from.
02:06:49.000 You saw what happened in New York, which was a disaster with Congresswoman Carolyn Maloney.
02:06:57.000 It was a basic disaster.
02:06:59.000 It's mail-in voting.
02:07:01.000 And we can give you many other locations and sites.
02:07:04.000 What has happened is that's part of a big negotiation.
02:07:07.000 That's actually a small part of a big negotiation.
02:07:10.000 He likes to do this.
02:07:12.000 Yeah.
02:07:12.000 Make it small.
02:07:15.000 Here's all the complicated stuff.
02:07:17.000 He brings it in.
02:07:20.000 It's a master.
02:07:21.000 He's like a master communicator, but he's not, but he is.
02:07:25.000 It's like a weird thing.
02:07:27.000 Told you that was likes.
02:07:28.000 It's 12,000 people.
02:07:30.000 But still.
02:07:30.000 I just clicked on it again.
02:07:31.000 Still, 12,000 people ain't shit.
02:07:34.000 It's nothing.
02:07:35.000 We can go live on YouTube and have 120,000 people in five seconds.
02:07:39.000 That's so crazy.
02:07:41.000 I mean, he is...
02:07:42.000 It's been a wild...
02:07:43.000 It's very interesting.
02:07:44.000 I wonder about the kids that are growing up under him.
02:07:46.000 Like the young kids.
02:07:48.000 They have no idea about politics except for Trump.
02:07:50.000 Like they've never had any experience with anybody else.
02:07:53.000 This is what they know a president is.
02:07:55.000 And they're gonna vote for the first time when he's in office.
02:07:57.000 Like a lot of 15 year olds that were 15 when he got elected.
02:07:59.000 This is how a president talks.
02:08:01.000 That's why a lot of those kids are going to this just TikTok-y like dancing and nihilism and just being like, yeah, nothing means anything.
02:08:09.000 They're right.
02:08:10.000 It's also, I mean, imagine being a kid during the formative time of your life, the world gets shut down, you're stuck at home, and you can't even see your friends, you can't go to school, you gotta do school over a laptop.
02:08:20.000 It's crazy.
02:08:20.000 It's weird, man.
02:08:21.000 It's crazy.
02:08:21.000 My kids go to school over laptops, and I've sat in the room and watched, and those teachers could, when no one's watching the teacher...
02:08:28.000 They don't care.
02:08:28.000 They don't give a fuck.
02:08:30.000 Right.
02:08:30.000 They're so bad.
02:08:31.000 They're so apathetic.
02:08:32.000 Yeah.
02:08:32.000 Some of them are great.
02:08:33.000 Some of them are enthusiastic.
02:08:35.000 I abolish teachers.
02:08:35.000 It's...
02:08:36.000 I said that on my podcast the other day.
02:08:38.000 I said, abolish teachers.
02:08:40.000 Defund and abolish.
02:08:41.000 Is that getting a lot of press?
02:08:43.000 Is it popular?
02:08:44.000 No, I tried to start a movement.
02:08:45.000 It failed.
02:08:46.000 But I said, if we're going to let people police themselves, let kids learn on their own, abolish teachers.
02:08:50.000 Okay, so no cops, no teachers.
02:08:53.000 Yeah.
02:08:53.000 What else?
02:08:54.000 I mean, teachers have a much worse track record than cops, if you look at the numbers.
02:08:57.000 Well, they don't get paid as much as cops.
02:08:59.000 Well, but still, if cops were shooting as many people as teachers were failing...
02:09:06.000 I don't think it's that way.
02:09:08.000 You would have to make cops responsible for suicides, too, then.
02:09:11.000 But here's the whole thing.
02:09:12.000 Teachers, a lot of them are not doing a good job.
02:09:15.000 Yes, but a lot of kids aren't showing up.
02:09:17.000 Those are the education suicides.
02:09:20.000 I know, but I'm saying that if a lot of a group...
02:09:24.000 If we're going to broad brush a group...
02:09:26.000 I like to do that.
02:09:27.000 If we're going to broad brush cops, let's broad brush teachers.
02:09:29.000 Get rid of them, too.
02:09:31.000 Okay, who else do we get rid of?
02:09:33.000 Garbage people, take care of your own garbage.
02:09:35.000 No, we need them.
02:09:37.000 We need them.
02:09:38.000 Do we?
02:09:38.000 When people don't have a job?
02:09:40.000 It's true.
02:09:41.000 That's true.
02:09:41.000 How about that's where universal basic income comes from?
02:09:43.000 Yeah.
02:09:44.000 Get rid of cops, t-shirts.
02:09:47.000 Firefighters, you never see a fire.
02:09:48.000 Let's be honest.
02:09:49.000 I see fires all the time.
02:09:50.000 No, you don't.
02:09:51.000 Oh, in the hills?
02:09:51.000 I've been evacuated three times.
02:09:53.000 They take care of themselves.
02:09:54.000 The reality is, you never see a fire downtown in the city.
02:09:58.000 These guys put the sirens on, they're going to a movie.
02:10:00.000 They're liars.
02:10:00.000 Sometimes they go downtown.
02:10:02.000 They're white supremacists.
02:10:04.000 These firemen are white supremacists.
02:10:06.000 What about the black ones?
02:10:10.000 Multiracial white supremacy.
02:10:12.000 Endemic white supremacy.
02:10:14.000 They don't even know.
02:10:16.000 Yeah, but I don't know.
02:10:17.000 I mean, there's very few good solutions.
02:10:19.000 With COVID, with this, it's like, we're going to live in an imperfect world.
02:10:23.000 We have to decide what version of an imperfect world is sustainable.
02:10:27.000 All right, president.
02:10:28.000 Yeah.
02:10:28.000 You're the president.
02:10:29.000 President Tim Dillon.
02:10:30.000 What do we do next?
02:10:33.000 What do we do next?
02:10:35.000 If you took over right now.
02:10:37.000 We'd have to do a universal basic income for six months.
02:10:42.000 We'd have to do an eviction freeze probably.
02:10:44.000 Okay, where's the money come from?
02:10:47.000 We print it.
02:10:48.000 We've printed everything else.
02:10:50.000 Yeah, but you know how much money would be involved in universal basic income for how many millions of Americans?
02:10:53.000 Well, you could also do...
02:10:55.000 Well, it's a stimulus.
02:10:56.000 They're doing it right now with the stimulus, right?
02:10:58.000 I think the bigger problem is the eviction freeze.
02:11:00.000 You'd have to freeze evictions.
02:11:01.000 Gotta freeze that.
02:11:01.000 Gotta freeze that.
02:11:02.000 And mortgages as well.
02:11:03.000 Mortgages and rent.
02:11:05.000 Yes, freeze.
02:11:06.000 You know, I would do that.
02:11:08.000 I think that's the most...
02:11:09.000 But for how long?
02:11:10.000 How long do you freeze it for?
02:11:11.000 Four months?
02:11:12.000 Five months?
02:11:12.000 Six.
02:11:13.000 Six.
02:11:13.000 You know?
02:11:14.000 And then you would have to kind of open back up...
02:11:18.000 I would put all of the resources in energy.
02:11:22.000 There's not a coordinated federal response at Corona.
02:11:24.000 It's all state responses, which I understand makes sense to a certain degree because states are dealing with different things.
02:11:29.000 But there's been a lack of kind of a federal, I think, Like targeted response of like, here's what we hope happens.
02:11:39.000 Here's what we can...
02:11:40.000 Because I think right now people are just living without the idea of hope or the idea that something is going to get better or reopen.
02:11:47.000 And I think that like they need that.
02:11:48.000 And that needs to be on a federal level.
02:11:50.000 Like the country needs to go, hey, we're going to get moving again.
02:11:52.000 We're going to be able to travel internationally.
02:11:54.000 We're going to be able to do all these things we used to do.
02:11:56.000 Here's what needs to happen first.
02:11:58.000 And there doesn't seem to be a huge...
02:12:00.000 You know, push for that kind of clarity.
02:12:02.000 My real fear is the thing that we were talking about earlier, that businesses are not going to have enough money to reopen, and that money won't be available.
02:12:11.000 So how do you get the economy back on track?
02:12:14.000 Well, I think it's got to bottom out, probably.
02:12:16.000 And unfortunately, you've got to protect vulnerable people.
02:12:18.000 But the bottoming out, and I don't mean bottoming out completely, but...
02:12:22.000 The real estate value is being lowered.
02:12:24.000 All of these things happening.
02:12:27.000 It's going to be a years-long process.
02:12:29.000 I don't think it's immediate.
02:12:30.000 I think it's years.
02:12:31.000 And I think eventually what happens is you have a situation where, because of economic turmoil, you might have...
02:12:38.000 But yeah, the businesses you're talking about are probably fucked.
02:12:41.000 But those people might have a shot in three years when rents are lower and the cost of financing is potentially probably not lower, but maybe if we keep the cost of financing low.
02:12:53.000 I mean, that's the other thing.
02:12:54.000 Interest rates are going to creep up and it's just going to cost people a lot of A lot more money to borrow money.
02:13:00.000 So much of the economy is run on just this cheap credit that we've had since Obama and Schiff and all those guys explain it where it's just like it's a credit card and we're just basically borrowing money at close to no interest and businesses are expanding and people are able to get cars and go on vacations and get mortgages.
02:13:19.000 When those interest rates creep up, I mean, it's just a perfect storm of problems.
02:13:23.000 Jesus, damn.
02:13:24.000 It's a lot of problems.
02:13:25.000 I'm trying to end this on a happy note.
02:13:26.000 I mean, listen.
02:13:27.000 It's 33 o'clock.
02:13:27.000 I'm trying to like, let's wrap it up in a high note.
02:13:29.000 Here's the happiness.
02:13:30.000 Okay.
02:13:30.000 It's over.
02:13:32.000 Enjoy it.
02:13:34.000 It's over-enjoyed.
02:13:35.000 It's over-enjoyed, meaning that it's not going to end like, listen, we're going to limp through this somehow.
02:13:42.000 We're going to be broken and beaten and battered, but we're going to get through it.
02:13:47.000 We need a war with China.
02:13:48.000 We need another 9-11.
02:13:50.000 What?
02:13:50.000 I hope the people that run us are thinking of those things, and I bet they are.
02:13:54.000 Really?
02:13:55.000 Yeah, we need a war with China.
02:13:57.000 A war with China will kill everybody.
02:13:59.000 We need a false flag that gets us into a war with China.
02:14:01.000 But a war with China kills everybody.
02:14:02.000 It kills a lot of people, but the rest of the people will open up coffee shops.
02:14:07.000 Glow-in-the-dark coffee.
02:14:08.000 Hey, it is what it is.
02:14:10.000 I mean, there's no good ways out of this.
02:14:11.000 I think we probably need a prolonged war with China.
02:14:14.000 Jesus Christ.
02:14:15.000 And here's the other thing.
02:14:16.000 Before we leave, can I say this?
02:14:17.000 Yeah.
02:14:18.000 Can I say this?
02:14:19.000 War with China, ding.
02:14:20.000 And I don't want that, but we need it.
02:14:25.000 Who's closer to get us into war with China, Joe Biden or Trump?
02:14:29.000 I think Trump looks like it, but I think no matter who wins, we're just going to need a war.
02:14:34.000 It could be a Cold War.
02:14:35.000 It doesn't have to be a hot war.
02:14:36.000 It could be a Cold War.
02:14:37.000 Oh, Cold War.
02:14:37.000 Fun Cold War.
02:14:38.000 Cold War.
02:14:39.000 They build a thing.
02:14:39.000 We build a thing.
02:14:40.000 Oh, okay.
02:14:41.000 Yeah, we need that.
02:14:42.000 Because the whole economy is fake.
02:14:43.000 We need that.
02:14:44.000 Here's the other thing.
02:14:45.000 Derek Chauvin needs to get Epstein'd in prison.
02:14:47.000 Oh, Jesus.
02:14:48.000 And here's why.
02:14:49.000 They're not going to convict him on murder, too, because it's going to be a hard time proving intent with that body cam footage.
02:14:56.000 So what about the body cam footage?
02:14:58.000 Well, I mean, I don't know if they can.
02:15:00.000 The body cam footage shows that this, you know, they have Floyd in the car and he's out.
02:15:05.000 I mean, listen, everything Chauvin did was disgusting and horrible.
02:15:08.000 And but I don't know if you're going to be able to prove to a jury that he intended to kill this guy, murder him, or he was subduing a suspect who was resisting arrest.
02:15:21.000 I mean, he wasn't resisting arrest.
02:15:23.000 Not at that moment, but he was like...
02:15:25.000 Listen, when someone's resisting arrest, when they stop resisting, you're supposed to stop leaning your knee on their neck.
02:15:31.000 No, everything he did was indefensible.
02:15:32.000 I'm just saying...
02:15:33.000 But that's murder, too, then.
02:15:34.000 If he dies from that...
02:15:35.000 Did he intend to kill him?
02:15:36.000 This is what...
02:15:37.000 That's the whole thing.
02:15:38.000 It's intent.
02:15:39.000 So the reality is...
02:15:41.000 But that's crazy.
02:15:41.000 That's like if you stabbed someone, but you didn't intend to kill him.
02:15:43.000 Listen, I'm just saying he can't get off.
02:15:45.000 He cannot get off.
02:15:47.000 He can't get off.
02:15:47.000 I agree.
02:15:48.000 So, who was that guy that was Epstein's roommate?
02:15:51.000 The guy with the muscles?
02:15:52.000 Oh, yeah.
02:15:53.000 He needs to go room with him.
02:15:55.000 That's right.
02:15:55.000 He needs to go room with him, war with China.
02:15:57.000 The cop.
02:15:57.000 The big cop with the dogs.
02:15:59.000 That's what needs to happen.
02:16:00.000 Yeah.
02:16:00.000 These are the solutions, folks.
02:16:01.000 You may not like them, but they're the solutions.
02:16:03.000 Tim Dillon, ladies and gentlemen.
02:16:04.000 Thank you so much.
02:16:05.000 War with China.
02:16:06.000 There's the guy.
02:16:06.000 He's got to kill that guy.
02:16:08.000 We've got to move on.
02:16:09.000 Okay.
02:16:09.000 And then we've got to invade China.
02:16:10.000 He looks like he's ready to go.
02:16:11.000 Thank you for having me.
02:16:12.000 I appreciate it.
02:16:13.000 I love you, buddy.
02:16:14.000 I love you, too.
02:16:14.000 Thank you so much for everything.
02:16:15.000 It's always a pleasure.
02:16:16.000 It's crazy that I walked in here a little over a year ago, and I did this podcast, and I ended up moving.
02:16:23.000 It changed my whole fucking life.
02:16:24.000 It was amazing.
02:16:25.000 And you've done that for a lot of people, so thank you.
02:16:27.000 It's my pleasure.
02:16:28.000 Yeah, thank you so much.
02:16:29.000 That's one of my proudest things.
02:16:30.000 One of the things that makes me most happy about this podcast is that it helps people.
02:16:34.000 Thank you so much.
02:16:34.000 My pleasure, brother.
02:16:35.000 I appreciate it.
02:16:36.000 It's always a fun time.
02:16:36.000 Thank you, brother.
02:16:37.000 Today was no different.
02:16:37.000 I love everybody.
02:16:39.000 Thank you.
02:16:39.000 Bye.
02:16:39.000 Let's not go to war.
02:16:42.000 I want to get you in trouble at the end.