In this episode, the guys talk about their favorite concerts and what it's like to go to a rock concert. They also talk about drugs and how to get high at rock and roll concerts. And, of course, the end of the episode is a little bit of an inside joke about getting high with your own son. If you don't know who it's about, you'll have to listen to this episode to figure it out. It's a good one, and I hope you enjoy it! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. All rights reserved. Used by permission. This episode was produced and edited by Riley Bray. We do not own the rights to any music used in this episode. It was produced, produced, edited, and produced by our patrons. The opinions expressed are our own and do not necessarily those of our record labels, labels, record labels or record labels. Thank you to our patrons for all the support and feedback. Please don't forget to rate, review, subscribe, and subscribe to our podcast and tell a friend about what you think of the podcast! We are working on a new episode of our new podcast called and we'll be giving out a shoutout in the next episode of . in the future. Thank you for supporting the podcast. and a shout out to a good friend of yours! Cheers, Cheers! Cheers. Cheers Cheers - Cheers - Jon. Jon Jon and Jon and his family! Mike and his wife, Sarah and Sarah. - Jon and Sarah John and Sarah, and his son, . . Jon & Sarah, Jr. John, Jr., and his new book, John, Sr. & his new album, The Other Way - Thank you, Jon, and much more! Jon talks about how much he loves getting high in Venice, so much so that he loves it, too much so much, and it's not enough, and so much more, and he wants to do it more than that, and more, so it's too much, so he can do it all, it's more than enough, etc., and so on and more. And so on, etc, etc. etc., etc, and all that kind of stuff.
00:02:06.000When I first moved to LA, I started taking lessons at this place down the street, and I just found it was like one of these zen things that got me out of my head.
00:02:13.000You sit there and just play fucking, you know, simple stone songs and, you know, Tom Petty.
00:02:21.000Shit was just simple three-chord structures.
00:02:24.000Yeah, I would imagine it's like a lot of other difficult things where it requires all of your concentration.
00:02:30.000So it becomes like a bit of a meditation, right?
00:03:27.000So he gave me like 10 milligrams and I'm like a 5 milligram guy.
00:03:31.000And we watched a movie and then afterwards we both just went, alright, goodnight.
00:03:37.000I pictured, like, the first time I get high with my son would be, like, kicking back, talking about, you know, son, let me tell you what it's like to produce something from your loins, and it turns into something as beautiful as you, and, you know, I thought it would be, like, this existential, and it was like, goodnight.
00:04:24.000But if someone just breaks into your house and you come into your house and there's a guy rummaging through your drawers, if he hasn't stolen anything yet, the cops won't even arrest him.
00:04:32.000So you gotta pull out a calculator and find your receipts and just trail them?
00:04:36.000If he steals a stereo, and it's like, okay, well that's a $2,000 stereo, now we can bring him in and then immediately release him.
00:04:46.000You see what's going on in San Francisco where guys are going into stores and just filling garbage bags up with stuff and then just walking right out?
00:05:14.000Dude, last night I was walking over to Kill Tony, and holy shit, 6th Street is fucking nuts.
00:05:22.000I come around the corner, I've already seen somebody smoking crack, I saw two guys rolling joints just out in the open, and then I see these three homeless guys throwing garbage at a cop who's facing them off,
00:05:37.000and I'm just standing there watching, like, alright, this is on its way up.
00:06:31.000Because my wife and one of her lady friends was having this discussion.
00:06:35.000They were saying, Waco's amazing now because they've got this thing and they build houses and everybody goes there and it's really super cute.
00:06:41.000I mean, they've been doing the show long enough.
00:06:43.000They probably fixed every house in the city, but I don't know.
00:06:46.000Well, apparently, like, they've had a real impact on that area.
00:06:58.000You see a shitbag house and someone buys it for, like, you know, 80 grand, and they come in and start tearing walls down and putting this up, and in the end, it's done.
00:08:48.000I'm not going to say his name, but I was shocked.
00:08:53.000You know, I could see if you're an actress, I guess it really is like life or death in terms of your career of getting your eyes touched up.
00:11:27.000I just picture there being a great local bar.
00:11:29.000There must be some watering holes in a town like that.
00:11:32.000There is, but there's also weird shit, too.
00:11:35.000He's got some guy who bought a small piece of land right next to him so he could try to sell it to him, and then the guy's just doing loud construction on it all the time and trying to muscle him into buying this piece of land.
00:11:51.000And then he's going to have this house, if he builds it, that faces right into Doug's living room, staring at him.
00:12:01.000Doug used to give out his fucking home address on the podcast!
00:12:05.000I go, Doug, there's a million people listening.
00:12:08.000You're going to have at least 4,000 psychopaths show up at your house.
00:12:11.000And he would have crowds of people that would make the trek, they'd make the pilgrimage out to Bisbee to watch football games at his house.
00:13:38.000He said he looks at his own material as if he's like a prosecuting attorney, like he's prosecuting his material, like looking for flaws in it.
00:14:24.000Sometimes you just gotta redo a bit, like a tear down of a house.
00:14:28.000I feel like that happened with the pandemic, as I had a sheet full of new jokes that I was doing, and there is something that's sticky about the first idea you have on a premise.
00:14:41.000It's like, if you did it the first time, there's something in you that goes, oh, then that's the way it goes.
00:14:46.000But with the pandemic, I came back to some of these bits, and I didn't even remember how they went.
00:14:51.000And then I started doing them a different way and I was like, oh no, this is a better way than that.
00:14:56.000I'm glad I forgot the first version of this bit.
00:17:23.000Tom Cotter was a fucking rock-solid joke writer, performer.
00:17:28.000I mean, he was a guy, he was definitely a guy to learn from, you know, early on.
00:17:31.000He was a guy that, like, you know, had a rhythm, had a cadence, you know?
00:17:35.000And remember he used to do the sack walk?
00:17:39.000We would go to parties and Tom would pull his sack out and just have his balls, only his balls, hanging out of his pants and just act completely casual and go walking around and talking to people.
00:17:50.000And then you'd be having a conversation with him and you'd just go, what the fuck is going on, man?
00:20:52.000That was one of the more interesting things is like watching guys reclaim the stage because you'd have specific styles that were so effective.
00:21:02.000It was hard for the audience to get out of that person's head into another person's head.
00:22:09.000He was actually from Boston, so he came home, and he went to the Ding Ho, and these killers show up.
00:22:14.000And they're all in the back and they're doing lines and they're fucking drinking Jack and they go up one after the other and they're doing jokes about, yeah, so you go to Revere and the accent's like, and the guy's sitting there going like, oh, Jim McCauley was his name.
00:22:27.000And he goes, how the fuck am I going to put these guys on The Tonight Show?
00:22:31.000And then up walks Stephen Wright, who was like the redheaded stepchild in the Boston comedy scene because he was not aggressive.
00:22:38.000He was not like killing the way these guys would kill.
00:22:41.000But he went up and he was doing his deadpan Stephen Wright.
00:22:45.000And Jim McCauley lit up and he goes, what are you doing next week?
00:31:38.000Yeah, that's something that I take before every UFC. Because UFC's big for memory.
00:31:45.000And I have to remember fights from fucking decades ago.
00:31:47.000I have to remember positions and moves.
00:31:49.000And then when it gets to weird scrambles, I have to be able to explain things like what's in jeopardy while dudes are strangling each other.
00:31:58.000The right arm, he's got to get the right arm through there and grab this.
00:32:01.000And sometimes I haven't been in that position in a long time.
00:32:05.000And I have to go, okay, how does that work?
00:32:07.000Which arm does he have to cinch it up with?
00:34:48.000So when I see guys on the ground and they're going after the legs, that's one that I have to really think hard about what's in danger and what's not in danger.
00:34:57.000Because you can't put yourself in their position as much.
00:34:59.000I kind of can, but not like I can with like upper body techniques.
00:35:04.000Because the leg lock game kind of came around, really got really strong in like the 2013, 14, 15, like around then, up until 21. When I really stopped rolling every day was around that time.
00:35:19.000So that's like right around when the leg lock game became big in competition jiu-jitsu.
00:35:47.000That's interesting about not having...
00:35:50.000I was trying to think of a commentator that wasn't an athlete, and that guy, Joe Buck...
00:35:54.000His father was a big sports commentator growing up and he never played, as far as I know, I don't think he played sports, but he grew up watching them and watching his father call them and he's the best in the business.
00:40:54.000Usually sitcoms, it's like the whole mandate from the network is you got to be broke, you got to be struggling to follow your dream, you got to be blue-collar, otherwise people aren't going to connect.
00:43:04.000Dude, I did a college show when I was not that far in, and it was...
00:43:09.000No, I guess I'd been doing it for a while, but it was the day of the Columbine shooting, and I was in a hotel in Ohio doing some fucking small school, and I'm sitting there on the edge of my bed, like, my bag is half unpacked, and I'm sitting on the edge of the bed watching CNN going,
00:43:26.000And I'm waiting for a phone call about canceling the show.
00:43:30.000Like, there's no way we're doing this fucking show.
00:43:32.000This is at a school where, you know...
00:43:34.000And they go, no, we're going to do the show.
00:43:35.000And so I get there and I'm like, all right, this is fucking crazy.
00:43:38.000And they had about, you know, 15 people showed up.
00:43:42.000And then the student activities director goes up on stage before me and she goes, before we start the show, I think we all are aware of what happened today.
00:43:49.000And I thought we should have a moment of silence for the students that died in Columbine.
00:44:12.000I just started talking out my act and just watching that clock tick on that back wall, minute by minute, waiting to get that fucking $1,200.
00:44:24.000Was it one of them that you had to send the check in and then they sent you a check back?
00:45:03.000So I show up and it's like in one of these like corn fed Midwestern small towns where like they all went to church on a bus before the prom started.
00:45:13.000And so, and now I just show up, and they, you know, they're all on the dance floor, and they stop it, and they go, all right, now we're going to have a comedian, and I go up, and it was like, what was the movie where they weren't allowed to dance, and then all of a sudden, like, they're dancing?
00:45:29.000I get up there, and they fucking loved it, but I was, they told me to be clean, but, you know, I was relatively clean, I thought.
00:45:38.000And so I do the show, and then I get a letter sent to me, sent to my agent, to Scott Bass, and it was from the principal, Dr. Dave Nixon, and he said that I had corrupted the values of the town.
00:45:55.000Because I talked about doing cocaine, and I invited them to my motel for a keg after the show.
00:46:03.000And I talked about having sex with my grandmother, which were all taken out of context.
00:46:41.000Greg wrote a whole book on letters that his mom got from him being an asshole.
00:46:49.000Arrest, you know, arrest, you know, receipts from the police station, letters from principals, bad behavior reports, and then it went through.
00:46:59.000And the beauty of it is the letter ends with my asshole kids getting letters sent home.
00:47:04.000And so the last chapter of the book is me printing letters I'd gotten about them.
00:47:09.000And they, like, mirrored the exact shit that I was doing when I was a kid.
00:47:12.000I remember there was a story I'd heard secondhand from a gig that you did in New Hampshire, where it was one of those gigs where they told you, don't drive at night because there's so many moose on the road that you might die.
00:47:24.000And you get there, and you fucking, they said, this is a clean show, you can't swear.
00:47:29.000Like, the first word out of your mouth is, fuck.
00:52:47.000My dad, when my dad started making some money, because my parents grew up broke in the Bronx, and then my dad made some money in radio, and then he bought my mom a fur coat.
00:52:56.000And it was like a full-length fucking, I can't remember what kind of fur it was.
00:55:17.000We were talking the other day about Disneyland in Florida that over the last few years they've pulled hundreds of alligators out of Disney World.
00:59:09.000Yeah, because people who live on canals, they live near canals, they get like a bow fishing setup, and they're out there shooting and killing iguanas, and they turn them into chicken wings.
00:59:20.000Yeah, they whack their legs off, and they fry them, they fry them up, and they batter them, and they make these, it looks delicious, like these Asian dishes.
01:00:22.000Because they think that there used to be giant anacondas in the Amazon that were even bigger than that.
01:00:29.000Like what is the biggest, like the myth of the giant anaconda is something that's apparently, it's in dispute whether or not they're real things.
01:00:37.000I was trying to find the biggest python, which I did see it to say a reticulated python can grow up to 30 feet.
01:00:56.000It's hard to tell what's horseshit or not, but there's, like, photos of ones that people took from planes where you see this thing that looks like a telephone pole, but a 100-foot-long telephone pole making its way through the water.
01:01:46.000And then goes to get out of the water, and she's, like, pulling herself up, but it's a muddy slope, and she can't get out, and she's, like, fucking flailing on the side, and somebody helps her out, and she got out of the water, and, I mean, she was so scared that when she got out,
01:02:02.000she started laughing, and she was laying on the side of the pond fucking laughing for, like, two minutes.
01:03:15.000And she got killed by coyotes, which is super, super rare.
01:03:19.000But he was saying that is one of the worst ways to go because they try to kill you asshole first.
01:03:24.000Her death is the only known fatal coyote attack on an adult as well as the only known fatal coyote attack on a human ever confirmed in Canada.
01:07:18.000They're essentially free-roam, free-ranging elephants in Thailand that they've rescued from circuses and all kinds of different stuff like that.
01:08:30.000Elephants don't give a shit like these elephants don't give a shit and they know that you're gonna go down to this there's a trail you go through the jungle down into this like pond or this like lake there's a waterfall and you bathe them there and you hang out with them so you have like a little friendship with them uh-huh And it's cool.
01:15:40.000There was a kid named Kevin, there was John and me, the three guys in this art class, and we were all pretty fucking good, but all under the thumb of this shitbag art teacher.
01:17:49.000My daughter wanted one since she was like 12 years old, and we were like, you gotta wait until you're 18. And I said, if you wait until you're 18, the whole family will get a tattoo together.
01:21:12.000I remember one night I was driving, it was like, I hadn't eaten, and it was one of those gigs where, did you ever do college runs at all?
01:21:21.000So you would do like a college one night, and then you'd have a fucking nooner the next day at another college, which was like three hours away, lunch shows.
01:21:28.000So I get in the car, and I'm in, I think it was Iowa.
01:21:34.000And I get in the car and I'm fucking starving, but I get going because I was like, alright, I'll get something on the road.
01:21:38.000I gotta get to this next town so I can wake up and do the show.
01:21:50.000And so I pull over and they're still open and it's crank country or whatever fucking drug they do in Iowa because there was a security guard, an armed security guard inside the place because I guess they get robbed so much.
01:23:34.000And so there was like the Motel 6. I remember there was a block of wood, like a 2x4 connected to the room key so that you didn't take the room key or whatever.
01:23:44.000And then your door was open to the parking lot and there'd be some asshole who had a truck, a diesel truck, and he'd start it and the exhaust is fucking blowing under the crack of your door.
01:23:55.000That's what wakes you up in the morning.
01:24:57.000Just thinking it was this insurmountable, impossible-to-achieve goal of one day, one day, One day I'd just love to be able to make a living telling jokes.
01:25:11.000Those old days, man, of travel and struggle, it's so fucking important, man.
01:25:17.000I see young comics now that are doing that, and they're finding their voice at the same time that they're getting the freedom of following their dream.
01:25:28.000But also, creatively, it's like every moment of stage time means so much because you know you're getting better.
01:25:35.000Every time you hit that stage, you're getting better.
01:25:37.000And as you're making a living, and also creatively, you're not peaking, but you're growing.
01:25:43.000And there's something so fulfilling about that.
01:25:46.000And then all of a sudden it clicks and you see that confidence kick in.
01:25:49.000Like I saw it with guys like Mark Norman and Sam Morrell and guys out of New York now that I've seen over the last 10 years come into that stage.
01:25:58.000And then all of a sudden they get their confidence and it's like, you can't fucking stop this guy now.
01:27:30.000Tim has that show that he does with his producer, Ben, and it's just him ranting and his producer laughing about things.
01:27:37.000So he's got that sort of rant muscle, where they can just rant about things, and then I guess he probably takes some of those premises and cherry picks them, finds the best ones, and that becomes his comedy.
01:27:48.000So he had so much material, and so much of it was relevant.
01:28:22.000I'm wondering whether or not that's going to keep going, you know, because they're trying to shut things down now and people are panicking, you know, because of this recent new spike in COVID. Yeah.
01:28:31.000Because COVID is kicking back in again.
01:29:03.000Ivermectin is pretty cheap, because it's a generic drug, and it's been around for a long time.
01:29:10.000I don't know how much Z-Pax cost, and I don't know how much those monoclonal antibodies cost.
01:29:17.000But, you know, it's probably, you know, anytime you're in a hospital.
01:29:21.000If you actually have to go to a hospital, it's fucking expensive.
01:29:23.000Plus the long-term effects for some people can be expensive.
01:29:32.000Yeah, I'm just hearing so many people who are vaccinated that get it, and now they're saying that if you're vaccinated, it may only be good for three to four months.
01:29:40.000And so there was a guy online that was saying, what is this?
01:29:45.000Are you calling it a vaccine or is this a treatment?
01:29:48.000He goes, because if it's a treatment, it's a very different approach than a vaccine.
01:29:53.000Because most vaccines, other than maybe the flu vaccine, most vaccines give you immunity.
01:30:00.000Like if you get a measles vaccine, you get immunity for a long time.
01:30:04.000And I think a lot of people thought like you get vaccinated from COVID and you're not ever going to catch COVID. And now people are catching COVID and dying that are vaccinated.
01:30:21.000But, you know, there was a lot of people that didn't get symptoms before vaccines were out, which is interesting.
01:30:27.000So, like, I was reading this thing where this guy was making this argument.
01:30:31.000They were saying that the large number of people who are dying from COVID are the unvaccinated.
01:30:37.000And he said, yeah, but they're not taking these from recent cases.
01:30:41.000He goes, the problem with this thing is when they're saying the large number of people who are vaccinated from COVID or unvaccinated from COVID, the ones who are dying, they're going way back to like March of last year.
01:30:52.000And he's like, they're adding those where it was before there was even any vaccines.
01:30:57.000He's like, so the bulk of the deaths, yeah, there were unvaccinated people.
01:31:00.000But if you look at it now, he's like, people aren't dying nearly as much, even the unvaccinated.
01:31:06.000The real problem, and it's always been, is underlying comorbidities.
01:31:35.000I would have hoped that out of all this, that one thing would come out was the whole country would kind of wake up and say, look, taking care of yourself is very fucking important.
01:31:44.000But a lot of people just wanted that shot.
01:31:47.000They're just like, give me that shot and everything's going to be fine.
01:31:49.000Even I was talking to a good friend of mine who got COVID after he was vaccinated.
01:31:54.000He goes, dude, as soon as I got vaccinated, I stopped taking vitamins.
01:32:17.000You really want a balanced, healthy vitamin intake and exercise, particularly cardiovascular exercise.
01:32:24.000They think that that is one of the best things to ward off some of the worst cases of COVID is like if you're in good cardiovascular shape.
01:32:32.000A lot of people work out and they only do weights and they don't do the cardio.
01:32:37.000You gotta do, even if I only do 20 minutes, every time I work out I do at least 20 minutes of cardio before I lift weights.
01:32:43.000The saddest thing is to watch a guy who's buff run out of air.
01:33:10.000And when that pandemic happened and they closed down, I saw these guys coming back into the gym and the whole fucking midsection had collapsed and the muscles.
01:33:18.000And now they're all in there just fucking...
01:35:11.000Because I can remember, we're first going on the road.
01:35:13.000I mean, up until now, I'm not as intense about it as I used to be, but I used to be like, I would do the shows, tape my sets, I'd get up in the morning, get some coffee, And I would sit there with my tape recorder and I would fucking pause it and make notes.
01:36:31.000Like you said, he found his rhythm in his voice, and it just comes out.
01:36:36.000But for me, it was like I needed those hours alone in my hotel room pouring over that shit to make it good.
01:36:42.000Yeah, having that extra focus and that extra time and having the discipline to sit there and actually do that, that's what makes all the difference in the world.
01:37:26.000All that stuff accumulates, and it really does have a big effect.
01:37:30.000It's a matter of how much time, how much focus, how much are you concentrating on it, and how much are you really trying to innovate it, really trying to tighten it up.
01:37:41.000I mean, it's just like playing a sport.
01:37:44.000If you're beating the fundamentals into yourself, then when you're on stage, Your mind isn't fixated on, oh, what's the next joke or whatever.
01:37:53.000It's more like, oh no, I'm hitting this word instead of that word because last night in the second show that worked better.
01:39:10.000So now it's a running thing of like, can we get a different girl to make out with?
01:39:15.000I guess he's making amends to the Asian people.
01:39:18.000And so this girl comes up on stage, and it wasn't just her.
01:39:21.000There were like three women that were willing to come on stage.
01:39:24.000This girl comes up, and she's about five foot one, and she has one of those sites that you can be a prostitute, be like a stripper for people.
01:39:46.000So, and she shows us her tits, and they're pierced, and she, so she starts making out with this guy, but I mean, they are going at it, like shoving tongues down each other's throats, and then he goes, Tony goes, will you have sex with him?
01:40:01.000And she goes, yeah, yeah, but I want my date in on it, so we bring the date on stage.
01:40:07.000He's like, yeah, I'll do a three-way with this guy.
01:40:59.000I don't know if that's a good commercial for Kill Tony, but if you hear that and you don't want to go to that show, I don't know what else you're doing on Monday nights.
01:42:27.000And what it is, basically, is the cornerstone of the Austin comedy scene.
01:42:31.000Because that's where all the young guys and girls and non-binary folks get a chance to go up and do their fucking comedy for the first time.
01:45:21.000When you're all screaming and laughing and there's like six feet apart from each other, does that really have any impact on the spread of a virus?
01:46:21.000I wonder if they're going to be less scared.
01:46:22.000They find out that there's way less deaths.
01:46:28.000A lot of the deaths happened in the early days, too, when they didn't know how to treat it and they were throwing people on ventilators right away.
01:51:57.000There's some shows you really got to like, like Breaking Bad, you got to watch one, maybe two, and then you got to go sit alone in a room for a little while and ingest it and let it settle.
01:54:04.000Like, a lot of the shit that he did on SNL, a lot of that old school stuff, even like Fletch, like all those old movies, he fell down a lot.
01:54:12.000Think about how many takes you have to do with those.
01:54:15.000Think about how many times he did that probably doing sketch.
01:54:30.000How many nights have you fallen during a week?
01:54:33.000When I heard he was an asshole, Because my history with people getting punched and kicked in the head, my first thing I was thinking, I bet that guy's in pain all the time.
01:55:16.000John Hopkins is about to do something with USADA, and they're working with—they want to—they haven't begun the studies yet, but they're going to work with UFC fighters, and they're going to—I think they're going to work with some other athletes as well that have sustained some brain damage, and they're going to work on helping them with psilocybin mushrooms.
01:55:34.000Now, I've heard they've treated a lot of vets with that.
01:58:57.000Yeah, it's not cheap because a lot of insurance doesn't cover it yet.
01:59:02.000They keep petitioning because it's like you've got to look at the cost of fixing somebody's depression.
01:59:08.000And if you can spend whatever costs $10,000 for a treatment of it over six months and that keeps you from having to take medications for the rest of your life or go to psychotherapy for the rest of your life or whatever, the insurance companies have to start looking at it long ball as a real treatment.
02:01:53.000No, but if you think about it, like all these different Lutheran and Catholicism and, you know, Baptists and all the different branches of Christianity, like, yeah, it's been a long time since anybody really busted out with a new one.
02:02:48.000I literally fell out of my chair because I saw it in LA, and LA wasn't ready for it.
02:02:53.000New York was like, New York got it, but I saw it in LA, and when they did that song, and it's like 20 minutes in, and the first 20 minutes, they set it up, it's kind of sweet, it's kind of funny, and then they hit you with that song, Fuck Me In The Mouth, Cunt And Ass.
02:03:09.000Jesus, fuck me in the cunt mouth and ass.
02:03:32.000I mean, think about Team America World Police when they had that orgy scene or the sex scene with the two puppets and they added Like, all this extra shit because they knew that they were going to make them edit it.
02:03:42.000So they were shitting on each other and pissing on each other.
02:03:47.000And they did that just so that they could edit some of it out.
02:04:34.000Because if you let some young, woke, dumbass executive who just thinks he's going to fucking put his greasy little fingerprints all over that show and fuck it up...
02:04:46.000And it's such a cash cow for them, they have no choice.
02:06:13.000So I do that, we riff on it on your show, and then six months later, South Park does their pandemic episode, and it wasn't the same joke at all.
02:06:21.000I sent it to you, and you were like, dude, this isn't even the same fucking thing.
02:07:33.000That's the amazing thing about social media, you know, especially if there's a group of guys like Tom and Bert and Ari and me that have like, you know, all told together.
02:07:42.000Like all those guys have, I don't know what their numbers are, but everyone together, it's like probably 20 million fucking people.
02:09:53.000Because he had a whole sketch where Caitlyn Jenner had sex with Trump, you know, because he does Trump, and he had Caitlyn Jenner riding Trump and fucking him, and they were like, no way.
02:11:52.000I mean, the guy does a great impression with the voice, but now they can take your voice.
02:11:57.000Like, they've taken my voice, and there's a company out of Canada that took all the hours and hours of podcasts, and they have me saying all kinds of crazy shit.
02:13:09.000They take this deepfake technology and they swap Tom Cruise's facial features for this guy's facial features, and it all gets done through artificial intelligence CGI. Yeah.
02:13:28.000So they, like, where someone like you, like you have hours and hours of podcasts out there, they can take you basically all of your inflections, and they can take hundreds of hours of recordings that are available of you, and then they would be able to have you generate, like,
02:14:40.000They created these fake scenarios, but now they can do it in an insanely realistic way.
02:14:46.000They did it with Reagan way, way, way back in the day.
02:14:50.000Like, they had, I forget what country did it, they released some sort of a video or an audio recording of Reagan saying a bunch of shit that he never really said, and then they showed it on the news how they pieced it together from various speeches that Reagan had given,
02:15:06.000and they took the words out of context and smooshed it together and had him say some things that he never really said.
02:15:12.000But this Bourdain one, I think, is the first time that they ever had a deceased person narrating a documentary about himself with his voice, but with a script that some other people wrote.
02:17:31.000It's CGI, clearly CGI. Like, the girl is like a robot.
02:17:36.000But a lot of the people in the movie are part robot and part human.
02:17:42.000And it's this weird blurry line between reality and this clearly fictional scene.
02:17:52.000You're watching, you know, people getting sliced in half and their heads still moving and, you know, they're...
02:17:58.000They take this robot head and they put it on a robot body, but it looks...
02:18:03.000They've gone into that, what they call the uncanny valley, between something being a real depiction, like someone watching you right now is real.
02:18:23.000And so the girl looks fake, like she's got big giant anime eyes, but it's close to real.
02:18:30.000Like her hair looks real, and it's like, whoa, we're getting into some weird, strange gray area now.
02:18:37.000Well, especially if you think, you know, studios are always trying to cut costs, and it's a matter of time until they start putting secondary characters in as animated, or whatever you call this.
02:18:48.000Well, I think they should do that with children.
02:20:41.000Meanwhile, like, was that life, you know, day to day, was that a good life for him?
02:20:46.000I mean, that movie shot for like a year.
02:20:50.000Kubrick had them shoot for a fucking year, and he was doing like, apparently the take where the woman, what the fuck is her name, who was the star...
02:23:57.0002001. The conspiracy theory about him directing the moon landing was that he was doing it at the same time he was doing 2001. So because he was faking this space movie, 2001 A Space Odyssey, that they used him to fake the moon landing footage.
02:24:15.000And there's a fake documentary, not a real documentary, but a fake, like a mockumentary, where he's admitting and people are talking about...
02:24:26.000Yeah, a lot of people are like, dude, you didn't even know there's an actual real interview with him where he admits that he faked the moon landing.
02:25:14.000The fact that this is the only time in human history...
02:25:18.000That something is not cheaper, easier, and faster to replicate than it was in 1969. Between 1969 and 1972, there were seven trips, six successful, where they went to the moon and back.
02:25:33.000And every spaceflight since then has been like near-Earth orbit.
02:26:11.000If you watch the post-flight press conference, and again, I'm not saying that this is actually what's happening, but it seems completely like they're full of shit.
02:26:23.000When they come back, it seems like they're lying and they're nervous, and they ask them about the stars.
02:26:29.000And again, I'm not on the camp that they faked it, but there was Buzz Aldrin, Neil Armstrong, and Michael Collins.
02:26:41.000And Michael Collins, they asked him about stars.
02:26:44.000And in the press conference, he's like, I don't recall seeing any stars.
02:26:48.000Problem with that is Michael Collins never left the lunar module.
02:26:52.000He wasn't supposed to be one of the guys that was on the surface of the moon.
02:26:55.000He was up in the craft that was circling in orbit around the moon.
02:27:00.000And then later, when he wrote a book about it, he talked about how magnificent the stars looked.
02:27:45.000It's fun to think that Kubrick faked it all.
02:27:48.000It is, I remember, because I quit drinking, God, 30 years ago or something, and I quit smoking pot for 20 years, and then I guess 20 years later, I got high in Nebraska.
02:28:02.000My friend Ross Broccoli is his name, and he's a conspiracy theorist, drug head, who's a farmer, and he sat me down in front of a computer, and he got me high and showed me all this moon stuff.
02:28:14.000Pretty much everything you just said, he just kept showing me clips after clip.
02:28:19.000And I didn't fucking sleep that night.
02:28:21.000I was just laying in bed going like, this is crazy.
02:28:28.000There's a resurgence in moon hoax, moon landing hoax talk because of the kids.
02:28:34.000Kids are watching TikTok videos because it's real clear, like 30 second bursts where they get to see some wild shit that looks like they didn't really land on the moon.
02:28:45.000But it would be a fun thing to think that the government pulled the wool over everybody's eyes like that.
02:28:51.000Because also, when you look at the first Apollo 11, the first time guys landed on the moon, that was one of the first times that they didn't get a live feed.
02:28:59.000They forced the news cameras to film, to point their cameras at a projection screen.
02:29:06.000And they got the video from that of these guys bouncing around on the moon.
02:29:14.000It would be hilarious if it was faked.
02:29:17.000It really would be so appropriate when you think about how strange our culture is and how strange our relationship with the truth is when it comes to our politicians and so many things.
02:29:31.000Also, one of the weirder things about the moon hoax, see if you can find this quote.
02:30:06.000He goes, just a month before, Apollo 11 astronauts Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong had left their colleague Michael Collins aboard spaceship Columbia and walked on the moon.
02:30:16.000The old carpenter asked me if I really believed it happened.
02:30:47.000He said, I saw some things on TV that made me wonder if he wasn't ahead of his time.
02:30:54.000So he's literally talking about the moon.
02:30:57.000Well, look at all the information that's coming out now about UFOs.
02:31:01.000And didn't Obama say something to the effect of, like, he saw things when he was in office that made him question?
02:31:07.000Well, that's a completely different thing, right?
02:31:09.000Because then you're talking about suppression of information rather than a whole fake production.
02:31:17.000You know, the fake production thing is really compelling.
02:31:21.000Because this was also during the time of Operation Northwoods.
02:31:24.000And Operation Northwoods was a plan that was hatched out by the Joint Chiefs of Staff, signed and vetoed by Kennedy, where they were going to hoax all these attacks in the United States to get us to go to war with Cuba.
02:31:37.000They were going to blow up a drone jetliner.
02:31:39.000They were going to arm Cuban friendlies and attack Guantanamo Bay.
02:31:43.000They had this whole production laid out.
02:31:45.000And they were going to do this to try to get us to go into war with Cuba.
02:31:49.000And then you go back to the Gulf of Tonkin incident where they pretended that we got attacked.
02:31:54.000And they had this whole thing that led us into Vietnam.
02:32:30.000He was taken from when the United States won World War II. They took a bunch of Nazi scientists, because they were very advanced, and they brought them over and hired them for NASA. It was called Operation Paperclip.
02:32:45.000And Werner von Braun was one of those Nazis.
02:32:48.000He was a legit Nazi, to the point where the Simon Wiesenthal Center said that if he was alive today, they would prosecute him for crimes against humanity.
02:32:55.000He would hang the five slowest Jews in front of his rocket factory in Berlin to force people to work faster.
02:33:03.000And he was our head of NASA. And that was the guy that we brought over to get us to the moon.
02:33:10.000And if you pay attention to so much from that era, it makes it so desirable to think that this is what happened.
02:33:22.000It's also the climate at that time with the Cold War, I mean, in terms of what the stakes were in their minds of the Russians coming ahead of us, it's completely believable that they would make that effort.
02:33:38.000I'm not saying the United States did, but other people did fake some stuff back then, like the video footage of, was it Yuri Gagarin, the first guy that went into space?
02:33:46.000I mean, I'm not saying he didn't go into space, but the footage of him going into space looks so fake.
02:33:54.000Because if you look at the actual capsule that he was in, it was so small.
02:33:58.000But if you look at the video footage of him in space, it looks like there's lighting in there, and it looks like the cameras, it looks like he's faking it.
02:34:13.000But the actual video footage that Russia provided to show as proof of him in that rocket, they think was pure propaganda.
02:34:21.000Well, I guess the biggest stroke against it is the fact that how many hundreds of people would have to have shut up and been complicit in this lie.
02:34:30.000Yeah, but back then there was no internet.
02:36:52.000I lived next to him in Little Italy, and then I lived next to him in Venice Beach.
02:36:55.000I walked my dog every morning, and at 8 a.m., that motherfucker was sitting at his desk, typing.
02:37:01.000And if he wasn't there, he was in a car that I gave him.
02:37:04.000I gave him a fucking Volvo 240DL that was dead.
02:37:07.000I was like, I can junk it or give it to you.
02:37:10.000He would drive it into the desert for days and talk to these guys that were like X... LAPD that knew shit that were on their deathbeds that were finally willing to talk about how much cover-up was going on with the Manson case.
02:38:02.000That guy went to visit Jack Ruby in jail, and Jack Ruby became completely insane after that guy visited him.
02:38:08.000And there was no reason why Jolly West would be allowed in that fucking jail cell with him.
02:38:14.000There was no protocol that would allow that guy in his position to visit a prisoner of that stature at that time.
02:38:21.000And that was the guy in the CIA that was running the LSD program.
02:38:25.000And he went to visit him, and then after he met him, after he talked to him, Jack Ruby went completely fucking insane.
02:38:31.000So if you're going to have a guy, and you're going to have a guy kill Lee Harvey Oswald for you, and you're saying, listen, man, don't worry about it.
02:40:19.000And so all of a sudden, Tom was like teaching English as a second language in a community college.
02:40:23.000He was Uber driving, but he kept writing it.
02:40:27.000Even though the money was gone, he kept writing it.
02:40:29.000And then all of a sudden, he got interest, but they said, if we're going to give you a deal again, we're going to give you a co-writer.
02:40:36.000And I'm remiss in saying the guy's name, but he paired them up, and in one year, they took thousands of pages, and they collated it into one book.
02:42:13.000I mean, Operation Midnight Climax was a part of this MKUltra program, too, where they would go to brothels, and they'd have two-way mirrors, and these prostitutes would sit down with these guys who thought they were just going to get sex, and, you want a drink?
02:42:43.000And the fact that he found all the documents that supported this, all the evidence that the CIA had done all this stuff, all the MKUltra shit.
02:43:10.000I know, but you highlight people like him, these voices of people that are challenging stuff.
02:43:15.000Well, it's important for people to know that what you see on the news is a show and that what's going on behind the scenes is real complex and has been going on for decades and decades and decades without any oversight,
02:43:34.000And there are people like that Jolly West guy, like those people that are running MKUltra, like the people that ran Operation Midnight Climax.
02:43:41.000They were doing that shit for years with impunity.
02:43:54.000They got him out and supplied him with LSD and taught him how to turn people into killers.
02:44:01.000Taught him how to get people to do whatever the fuck you want them to do.
02:44:05.000And Manson was pretending he was doing acid with them and they were all tripping out and Manson was like steering them and leading them and molding them.
02:44:40.000Notorious Boston criminal Whitey Bulger may have been driven to murder by LSD experimentation in the 1950s, according to one of the jurors who convicted him.
02:45:15.000You know, Dana White, the president of the UFC, he had to leave Boston because Whitey Bulger's thugs were trying to muscle money out of him.
02:47:03.000We stayed on the right side of him, though.
02:47:05.000It's so wild that it was all connected, that it might have all been connected to LSD and the CIA and the FBI. Looking through a different article in the Boston Globe, there's another attorney that says he would have used that for a defense for Bulger if they'd have known it,
02:47:20.000but it came out later in letters he was writing to this juror.
02:47:24.000So maybe that means it's not necessarily true, but...
02:47:38.000Why would we ever believe that they only did it to Manson?
02:47:42.000Especially if you get some fucking murderous, organized crime leader, and you got him in jail, and you know he's some piece of shit killer.