Joe Rogan is joined by comedian and writer Cameron Haynes to talk about the dangers of camping and the alligator attack on a woman in Florida, and the weird things you should be scared of when you go camping. Also, a woman was mauled to death by a grizzly bear in her tent, and a man was eaten by an alligator in the middle of the night. Joe Rogan's new book is out now, and it's out on Amazon Prime and Vimeo. Click here to see if you can get a free copy of the book and watch it here. It's available on all good podcast directories, if you search for it, you'll find us. If you don't have an Amazon Prime membership, click here to get yours for free. Thanks for listening and share the podcast with your friends and family! Cheers, Joe and Cameron Thank you so much for coming on the pod, and we hope you enjoy this episode, and that you enjoy it as much as we did! XOXO, Joe & Joe xoxo and Cheers! - The Crew at JOE ROGAN Logo by Courtney DeKorte Music by Jeff Kaale ( ) and Andrew Schultz ( ) Produced by Matt Knost ( ) Audio Engineer and Editor by Matt Kucharski ( ) Music by James Rocha ( ) Editor by Ben Koppel ( ) Artwork by Ian McKinnon ( ) Thanks to Mackenzie ( ) & Sammi ( ) for the driftwooden ( ) Thank you for joining us on this episode of the podcast for producing this episode Thanks to . and ( & , thanks to . . . in is ? on the music by from by , and , our logo by . , and our logo thank you for s ) & our to be so we can be heard on this podcast is , thank you at this episode is ! and all the best work by our logo is and thank you to , so you can help us out in the next episode , all of our work is in this podcast, and so much more out there and we appreciate all the support we get back on the airwaves
00:03:21.000It's just these fucking idiots who come from like Chicago and they're used to cities and they never really seen a buffalo and they're trying to get close for a selfie and you know these things are in the rut.
00:04:33.000Like, do you need to be in nature and feel so fucking vulnerable because your regular day, that's not something that you're experiencing?
00:04:41.000Yeah, I think it's a reality check of what your relationship with the world really is.
00:04:46.000Because we live in cities, and we drive in cars, and we go into buildings, and you get confused, and you think that is the world.
00:04:53.000But the world is filled with all kinds of variables, and one of the more fascinating variables is nature and wildlife, because they're so uncaring about you.
00:05:03.000Like, one of the things that I always get when I'm in the mountains is like, these mountains don't give a fuck about you.
00:05:08.000They don't give a shit how many Instagram followers you have or how well your special did or how well your podcast is doing.
00:07:33.000It's not the gestation period, but it's the period where the baby dolphin is vulnerable because dolphins are similar in a slight way to human beings in that it takes a long time for the animal to mature because their brains are so large and they're so intelligent.
00:07:49.000You know, it's not like a chimp, like a chimp within like two years.
00:08:05.000Because like a lot of, you know, a sitcom's like 22 minutes.
00:08:08.000But a lot of times they'll have like 40 minutes of footage, and they're trying to just like get the most laughs and make the story move along.
00:08:14.000So we had this thing where there was a baby chimp.
00:09:58.000Like the other day I was driving down this road and I had to stop the car.
00:10:01.000And this guy was like waving his arms.
00:10:03.000Like I saw the deer, but this guy was waving his arms.
00:10:05.000Because there was this cute little baby and a little baby brother.
00:10:08.000And they're like trying to make their way across the road.
00:10:10.000But they're like this big, little tiny ass deer.
00:10:12.000Okay, have you ever seen a situation where, like, another animal recognizes that there's, like, an infant from a different species and then doesn't murder it?
00:10:35.000So, but you've seen these videos of like in the zoo where like a fucking Cocker Spaniel and a lion grow up together and then for whatever reason they don't eat each other.
00:12:17.000So how do we keep the quote-unquote, like, bad guys around long enough So in case something needs to be done, they handle it.
00:12:26.000And I think, like, the American way of doing it is going, hey, we're just gonna, like, kind of create these little organizations that do the bad shit, and the American people don't really need to know about it.
00:13:09.000And there's a lot of people that have said that if America had mandatory military service, you'd have a lot more patriotism, a lot more people who understand the role that the American military plays in the world.
00:13:38.000If you really look at the American power structure and the benevolence attached to it, that to me is the most impressive thing about a George Washington stuff.
00:14:09.000I was talking to someone who has a relative over there in Russia and they were saying that they thought that Ukraine was filled with Nazis and they were over there to liberate the Ukrainian people.
00:14:23.000So the propaganda is that Ukraine has been run by Nazis.
00:14:27.000Yo, liberation is a great excuse for invasion, bro.
00:14:50.000And I've joked around about this, but I wonder if life gets to a certain point of inconvenience where you start being okay with dark tactics being taken to return you to convenience.
00:15:38.000Or Antifa, or whatever the organization is.
00:15:40.000Like, the second life, the gas prices are too high, all of a sudden, weapons of mass destruction, or the second anything is about to be inconvenient, there's the group that goes and does it, and then I don't have to feel weird, like I snitched on the person in the elevator.
00:15:53.000That's, I think, the American or, like, the Western experience.
00:15:56.000We're removed from the things we would feel guilty about.
00:16:01.000Like, even in America, we all say to everybody around the world, like, oh yeah, we hate that they did that thing with their weapons of mass destruction.
00:16:06.000It's disgusting what they did in Iraq.
00:16:17.000Brittany Griner is imprisoned right now in Russia because she went over there to play basketball and she had cannabis oil vape cartridges that she had on her.
00:16:28.000I don't know if she just didn't know they were illegal or she tried to sneak them in.
00:16:33.000And they've got her arrested, it's against the law, and she might do ten years in jail over there, which is fucking horrific.
00:17:35.000She knows that if it isn't a wartime where she's essentially become a proxy between America and Russia, she can bring whatever the fuck she wants.
00:19:16.000And unfortunately, this is kind of fucked up, but the reality is, if they're not in a physically objectified situation, like they are in some positions, like female tennis, for example, they got them walking around with these tiny little skirts, ass cheeks, fucking hanging out.
00:20:00.000All a heel does, I mean, you know this, it accentuates the muscles in your legs and it raises your ass to put you in like almost a doggy style type position.
00:23:29.000When someone got to breeding age, you bred with them as quickly as you could, because they probably weren't going to make it to be 20. I mean, that's a wild debate that's happening, a bunch of few guys, like thousands of years ago.
00:23:40.000Like, I don't want to bang these young girls, but no one's living.
00:23:45.000Well, I don't think they thought 15 was old back then, or young back then.
00:23:50.000Because I think, you know, with the average age of death...
00:23:53.000Well, the average age of death is complicated, right?
00:23:55.000Because when they calculate the average life expectancy of people that lived a long time ago, really you have to factor in infant mortality, which screws everything up.
00:24:04.000There's so many children and babies died young.
00:24:36.000That's so wild to have a kid as a woman, like, that primal urge back in the day, knowing that there was, like, a 25% chance it either killed you or the baby.
00:24:45.000I don't know what those percentages are, but knowing every time you're going into this...
00:24:48.000That, you want to talk about, like, your...
00:24:51.000That's why, I don't know, like, when I hear a lot of, like, people like our age or whatever like that, like, there's a lot of women like, I just don't want kids.
00:24:57.000And it's like, I understand intellectually why you might not.
00:25:02.000But there has to be a biological impulse inside of you yearning to do that.
00:25:34.000I think the way nature works, and this is me just completely guessing, when there's an abundance of people, like in urban situations, people are much less likely to have children.
00:25:48.000Do you know that that's the argument for underpopulation, right?
00:26:49.000And I think what happens is you just start to get addicted to this feeling of bringing life into it because there's this old impulses baked into our DNA that this is what we're supposed to do.
00:26:57.000And he's in a financial situation where they both are, where they can do that, and there's not many restrictions put on them.
00:27:02.000But to, like, over-intellectualize it, like, I'm trying to bring back the population.
00:27:06.000It's like, no, you get a kick out of it.
00:27:50.000In that film, there's this one guy who lives in a trailer and he's got like 50 kids, keeps fucking all these women, he's fucking the neighbor, he's having kids with everybody, and then there's this super educated couple that's holding it off and putting it off until they're in their 40s, and then they can't have kids, and the guy doesn't have any sperm left,
00:28:56.000I haven't fully formed this thought, but basically, like, I think from my friends who have kids...
00:29:01.000Once you have kids, the world shrinks, right?
00:29:05.000It's like, what matters is your family, what matters those kids' lives, what's going on in their lives, are they struggling, do they not have friends in school, is one of them hurt, is one of them injured, are they, like, developing emotionally?
00:29:17.000You don't have all this extra time to be worried about all these kind of, like, manifestations of outrage, right?
00:29:25.000Like if you have two fucking toddlers that you're carrying around all day and mustard stains all over your shirt, you're not exactly going to the march about Chappelle's show and saying this is fucked up.
00:29:34.000And I think what happens is in these urban centers where you're saying these like cities like New York where I live and these other ones, San Francisco and LA, people are waiting so much longer to have children so they have so many more years to focus on The outrage or focus on what is wrong with the world.
00:29:53.000Now, I'm not saying that we shouldn't put focus on that.
00:29:55.000I'm just saying it is harder when you have three kids you have to take care of and provide for every single day.
00:30:28.000Which women with children get a little upset, saying, well, the problems of the world, like, we have to make the world better for the next generation.
00:30:34.000I don't want my kids getting shot in school.
00:31:05.000Do you know, when coyotes do roll call, you know, when they howl?
00:31:09.000When they're doing that, they're checking to see who's around.
00:31:12.000And if one of them doesn't respond, that means they're dead.
00:31:15.000And what happens with the female is, when a coyote gets killed out of a pack, the female coyotes will produce extra offspring in their litter.
00:31:25.000So, like, if a coyote pack remains intact and they have no threat and they do the roll call all the time and all the coyotes respond, the female will have two or three cubs.
00:31:36.000But if they call out and then a coyote doesn't respond or one or two is dead, then the female will have five, six, seven cubs.
00:31:46.000There's a natural thing that happens in their body where nature realizes they have to pick up the slack because there's animals that are missing.
00:31:54.000When you're in an environment, like an urban environment, and you are stuck on the 405, and there's fucking millions of people, the last thing you think is, man, we need more people.
00:33:16.000They're the only animal other than us that does it for pleasure.
00:33:20.000My understanding was specifically the bonobo chimpanzees have sex with everybody like almost family members and everybody's fucking and the idea was if everybody's fucking we have to protect everyone because everybody could be your kid, they could be your father, they could be your uncle, etc.
00:33:34.000Sort of, but the males fuck their kids.
00:39:01.000Everybody wants Chappelle at the venue, but if everybody is at the venue is going, I'm not going to work, then you can't exactly have a show.
00:39:06.000So they do it at the other show, this other venue, and then the protesters went to the other venue and were kind of like, I don't know, for lack of a better term, harassing the people that were going to go to the actual show.
00:39:18.000And my buddy went there, and they were trying to fight him.
00:39:23.000Like he wasn't even going to the show.
00:39:24.000He was going to see what was happening.
00:39:26.000He wasn't like part of like an anti-protest type thing.
00:39:42.000Yeah, I haven't seen it, so we'll see it for the first time together.
00:39:46.000But look at this real quick before you play the video, right?
00:39:48.000So a guy found out, one of the guys who was protesting was trying to fight him and fuck him up, found out who he was and then sends him a message, right?
00:39:57.000And the guy's name is Anthony, and he has his pronouns he and they in the bio.
00:40:15.000So he goes, hey, Abdi, I've talked with others who were there and closer to you now that the picture has become clear.
00:40:21.000I'm very sorry that the white guy started off the whole escalation and caused a bunch of bad assumptions.
00:40:27.000This is 100% why, as a cis white guy, I choose to follow the directions of the activists slash organizers on the ground instead of taking the lead.
00:42:00.000But the thing about Chappelle's special that drives me crazy, and this is one of the things that drives me crazy about cancel culture, air quotes, outrage culture, I should say, is that people don't know the full story, and they protest, and they get crazy,
00:42:16.000and they have a narrative that they've either read or they've seen, and then they just adopt that narrative, and they run with it.
00:42:23.000And the narrative is that his special was transphobic.
00:42:26.000That special is not transphobic at all.
00:42:28.000It's essentially a love letter to a friend who committed suicide.
00:42:31.000I think that depends on your definition of transphobia.
00:42:34.000I've talked to some trans people about this.
00:42:36.000And they feel, if you do not believe that they are the gender that they identify as, if you believe that they're not that, that that is considered transphobic.
00:42:47.000So, for example, in the special he's like, I don't believe that you're a woman.
00:42:51.000I don't hate you, but I don't believe you're a woman.
00:45:06.000No, actually, you're every single cell of your fucking body.
00:45:11.000Do you know that there's a movement right now amongst archaeologists where they don't want to identify dead people as male or female because you don't know how they're identified?
00:45:25.000You can dig someone up that has been dead for 100 years and you can tell whether or not that was a male or a female, meaning did they have a double X chromosome or an XY. You could tell by the structure of their body.
00:45:51.000I don't know what the fuck that feels like, but if you say that that's how you feel, it is confusing, but I can't tell you that you don't feel like you're in the wrong body.
00:45:59.000But that was the original way they would address it.
00:46:02.000Now they just address it in terms of the most aggressive versions of trans people.
00:47:57.000The reason why I haven't named the streamer and people have said a bunch of things is because the guy there is a good guy and he fought for it.
00:48:46.000I go I'm not cutting these and they start saying these like weird like corporate terms like You know, we don't want any punching down Which is like really the most like bigoted fucking way of looking at something like you have to look at yourself higher and above another person and like I get it You see a white guy on stage making fun of every different culture and person like I'm calling I'm fucking making fun of a Somali dude I'm making fun of women I'm making fun of like whoever it is Mexican yourself too though a lot exactly I'm
00:49:29.000I don't like dissecting comedy like that too much to other people like with the comics or do it, but like I'm curious in your culture and I want to learn about it.
00:49:35.000And like, I understand that like as an outsider, maybe I have some cool observations that like, you know, but you didn't know other people saw.
00:49:41.000And then you get to see that kind of get exposed, and people really like that.
00:49:56.000And we had this great fucking thing at these live shows where everybody walks in the door and they just they turn off the I'm offended by everything or whatever the world is outside and it becomes like I don't know what the I don't even know what to compare it to but it kind of becomes like remember when you're riding the bus to school?
00:50:17.000And you're going to get some shit thrown in the back of your head, and then you're going to clap back at that motherfucker for having a big nose, and he's going to clap back at you, and this girl's got red hair, we're fucking lighting her up, and it was just the best 30 minutes on the way to school.
00:50:41.000It's like, is it okay to seek out that kind of humor?
00:50:44.000Now, if you don't like that kind of humor, don't fucking watch it.
00:50:48.000And this is the fucking, this is the crazy thing about it.
00:50:52.000Because I understand somewhat the the network wants like take it down and I'm fucking grateful I was even able to buy it back Okay, that's awesome.
00:50:58.000I put it out myself right and I put out on my website and I'm only putting out for fucking two weeks Okay, there's a two-week fucking window where you can buy it.
00:51:05.000It stops I think August 1st or July 31st I don't know but whatever the fuck I want interesting cuz I own it That's why did you decide two weeks though urgency I saw these amazing comics put specials up on like a platform like Netflix, and it just like,
00:54:23.000I'm so grateful for you for even shining a light on what I was doing and creating this opportunity for me.
00:54:29.000Coming on this show for the first time, not only changed my career, but I think it changed a lot of comics' career because they also started doing the YouTube stuff and Instagram stuff and it really transformed how comedy is done now for a new generation.
00:54:41.000Literally, it's like idea and then platform and cosign can shift the fucking industry, dude.
00:55:22.000I gotta give so much credit to Louis because like, if he didn't, and Tom Segura and Christina P, because they were doing the, your mama's house live.
00:58:37.000Because like during the COVID crisis, one of the things that got really highlighted to a lot of people is our dependence on other companies in other countries rather to produce stuff.
00:58:48.000And that's one of the reasons why, you know, the United States is, they're spending money and putting a lot of effort into the manufacture of chips.
00:58:59.000And right before they were about to announce this, Nancy Pelosi's husband, because he knew apparently, maybe, what do you think?
01:03:13.000A family of Bill Clinton advisor who admitted Jeffrey Epstein into White House seven times has blocked release of files detailing the death scene after he was found hanging from a tree with a shotgun blast at a ranch 30 miles from his home.
01:03:26.000See, this is the stuff that we didn't know before the internet.
01:04:36.000We don't know what else he was involved in.
01:04:38.000Look, it could have been he was banging some guy's wife.
01:04:41.000When someone gets killed, just because that person's corrupt or involved in a corrupt thing doesn't mean they're the people that kill them.
01:04:47.000People that are often corrupt are involved in a lot of shady shit.
01:09:36.000I'm trying to say, like, I don't understand, like, why it's always on us.
01:09:39.000No matter what happens to the kid, it's our fuck-up.
01:09:43.000Present a mommy issues argument to me.
01:09:45.000Well, I think with men in particular, there is a thing that happens when a man grows up without a father figure.
01:09:53.000And then with women, the thing that happens is the woman grows up longing for male attention.
01:10:01.000I think there's a balance in nature that male, and this is not to say that a lesbian couple can't raise a healthy child because they can, or a gay couple can't raise a healthy child because they can, and it's not saying that a single mom can't raise a healthy, because there's a lot of powerful people out there that were raised by single moms.
01:10:18.000But in some situations, there is a longing for that figure in your life.
01:10:24.000And you see it in other people's lives.
01:10:26.000Like, you go to your friend's house, and the dad's cool, and he takes you fishing, and everybody goes, God, I wish I had a dad like that.
01:10:35.000Not just one of the most powerful people in the world, at the time he was the Vice President of the United States of America, but also hooking you up with corrupt business deals.
01:12:44.000I don't know, maybe you move on beyond this shit, but, like, the collective wisdom towards COVID now is kind of like what you got in trouble for.
01:13:04.000In the beginning, people were scared and they really felt like if you had COVID, you did something wrong if you got COVID because they really thought the vaccine protected you.
01:13:38.000There's an astonishing number of police officers that are overweight.
01:13:41.000And all my friends in the tactical world, like all my friends that are SEALs and high-level military guys, they think it's disgusting when they see overweight, obese cops.
01:13:54.000To be a person that might be in a situation where you have to use your body to either protect others or protect yourself, and you have slovenly eaten yourself into a fucking water balloon Of fat and cholesterol.
01:15:31.000To deal with the fact, but he was, the doctor looked at his knee and he said, I can't even believe you could walk on this, never mind run thousands of miles.
01:17:10.000Or, like, he was, you know, he'd suffer from depression and that kind of stuff.
01:17:12.000And, like, I wonder if, in a weird way...
01:17:15.000And this is, like, some Duval-level shit where, like...
01:17:17.000You know, what is your perception on this?
01:17:19.000It's very easy for me to be selfishly going, my dad doesn't remember a combo I had.
01:17:22.000But, like, the altruistic way of going is, like, what if he's dealing with less stress and he's enjoying his day and he's reading his books and he's like...
01:17:37.000And, like, if he's seemingly doing the best that he can for this situation, I mean, it's stressful for my mom, but, like, if he's doing the best that he can in this situation, like...
01:17:46.000It doesn't help him at all for me to be lamenting what he's going through.
01:17:51.000It depends about the economic situation, right?
01:17:53.000Like if your dad's well off enough so that he can get care and get people to take care of him and you just sort of ride off into the sunset, that is what it is, you know?
01:19:51.000Yeah, I just thought it was the coolest thing.
01:19:53.000Well, that's one of the things they think happens to people, and one of the ways to avoid some of the cognitive decline is to do a bunch of different things, like drive different ways to work, don't do the same pattern every day.
01:20:06.000And one of the things that kills people is, like, the day-in, day-out grind of the same job, the same stuff, with the same people, a lack of novelty.
01:20:16.000It builds elasticity in the brain tissue or something like that?
01:20:19.000Yeah, you should always try to do new things, try to learn new languages.
01:20:22.000Like Bertrand Russell, who was this incredible, fascinating intellectual, was sharp as a fucking tack, like deep, deep, deep into his old age.
01:20:32.000There's some great YouTube videos of him talking about stuff, like deep into his old age.
01:20:56.000And I think the mind is very similar to that.
01:20:59.000It's not the same in like you don't see the physical growth of it, but it's like it's making connections, it's doing stuff that force it into that place where it has to be considering things and learning and growing.
01:22:00.000So, like, low-key, this is why fucking Larry David, I think, is the GOAT. Because, like, as a comedian, like, it's very easy, like, when you get successful.
01:22:11.000I think sometimes people get less funny when they're less successful because you remove the inconveniences in your life that push you to write the bit.
01:22:18.000Like, I moved back to New York because I couldn't write jokes in Miami because life was too wonderful.
01:22:24.000Dude, it was like people there, they want to hang out with their family, they want to party, they want to listen to music loud, they want to dance, they want to eat food.
01:22:32.000That is not anything for me to push back against.
01:22:35.000I need you raged about something, and then I want to take away your rage.
01:22:40.000The more outraged you are, the more I want to take away.
01:24:13.000The world is constantly rubbing against him.
01:24:17.000I thought initially that he did Curb, and I was like, oh, is he just trying to tell people that he was the talented one, not Jerry, and Jerry's getting all the fucking credit, right?
01:24:25.000And he's like, let me show these motherfuckers.
01:25:45.000And I think you see this with like the Kardashians a lot where it's like people can't stop looking at them, but they also can't wait to shit on them.
01:25:53.000They fucking hope, but they can't stop looking.
01:25:55.000So it's like, they're flaunting what they got, but every second they do something wrong, Kylie takes a jet from here to here, how dare you, you're a climate killer!
01:26:04.000I was reading an article about all the celebrities that are eco-conscious, that are all flying private jets, but they were detailing the short jets, the short Three minutes!
01:30:16.000When there was no one around, he's showing me this fucking jet engine Oh, the Rolls Royce that has the jet engine, and he's got one that has a steam engine, and he has one that's like a tractor, but it had metal wheels that it rolls around on metal wheels, and he actually had to put rubber over the metal so he could take it on the street,
01:30:35.000because he drives all of them on the street.
01:30:37.000He's got these cars that are worth a million dollars, and he just drives them around, waving to people and shit.
01:32:26.000So we're on this island, and it's like, I'm there, and I realize...
01:32:31.000It feels like everyone there wants people to know they're there and wants people to look at them and look how big my yacht is and look I'm gonna buy this thing from this store I'm gonna buy that and when I was on Amalfi it felt like people were there to enjoy the most beautiful coastline That could exist.
01:32:49.000And there was this immediate, I don't know, it's stupid to call it disgust, but there was immediate change in energy when we went for this other place.
01:32:57.000And there was probably equally wealthy people staying at this other place.
01:33:00.000But they were the type of people who aren't like, hey, look how wealthy I am.
01:33:03.000They were the type of people like, Oh, this is beautiful.
01:33:05.000Oh, this restaurant over here is absolutely gorgeous, and I think you really like this experience.
01:33:09.000And there was something fucking gross about seeing stupid Tommy Hilfiger's yacht with the big fucking flag.
01:33:16.000You need them to know it's your yacht.
01:34:14.000The art that you create, the comedy, the way it gets into people's minds and enhances their experience and enhances their day, and they leave talking about that joke or this joke.
01:34:25.000Remember when that happened and the Pakistani guy?
01:36:37.000I think it's like the greatest thing that humans create, other than other humans, is these things where they express themselves through their work, whether it's a book or a song or furniture.
01:40:12.000To make this business was unbelievable.
01:40:15.000That being said, the quality of the food, which is consistent, which is important, is great, but you're not going, wow, man, that was the best meal I've ever had.
01:40:22.000But then sometimes you have meals, and you're like...
01:40:30.000Like, I think partially that's why we're drawn to sushi, is you see how delicate they're putting together these, like a piece of nigiri, right?
01:40:39.000And there's like a single flake of a thing.
01:40:41.000And you're like, I think a little part of me is just going...
01:46:25.000And I don't want this to get too weird, but like...
01:46:29.000Technology has increased over time, obviously.
01:46:30.000Now we have phones and that kind of stuff.
01:46:32.000But like, what we indulge in, in our acceptance, we might get to the end of it, and then we restart.
01:46:39.000So we don't have cell phones yet, but they might have got to the point where it's like, yo, dude, fuck another dude, that girl's eating a goat's pussy, and then whatever it is, and that's just on the menu.
01:46:46.000And then eventually, I think humans go, Alright, buddy.
01:48:33.000And they're looking to improve their life.
01:48:35.000And they're looking to improve society.
01:48:37.000And when you do that over the course of time, and then you take into account, like, surplus and luxury and, you know, time, and you don't have to worry about being eaten by wolves,
01:48:53.000and you have a lot more money than other people because you live in this castle, and you're a king, and you want everybody to eat your shit in front of you.
01:49:47.000How long that takes before that, you know, before that club comes down.
01:49:52.000One of the things that happens is you get to a point where, and I think this is where society is headed, we get to a point where we recognize that our animal instincts, our human reward systems, our need for ego, our need for control, our need for lust and revenge and all those things,
01:50:11.000they get in the way of ultimate progress.
01:50:13.000Our ultimate progress is achieving enlightenment.
01:50:25.000Well, we do that by abandoning our genitals.
01:50:27.000We're gonna have to get past our desire to breed using sexual intercourse and people will eventually breed just by some sort of genetic manipulation.
01:51:12.000Even if aliens aren't real, I think what it represents to us is if you take where we are now and you extrapolate, you go further into the future, You say, well, where is this going to go?
01:51:46.000This is like where the human body is going, and then it eventually will transcend that to become some sort of hybrid of machine and biology.
01:51:56.000So you subscribe to we're going to be like transhumanoid, I think is the term.
01:52:32.000You know, I mean, it's like change is inevitable and progress is inevitable and innovation seems to be an inherent part of what it means to be a human being.
01:52:41.000It's like how you and I are interested in art.
01:53:18.000If you saw this 20 years ago, you'd be like, what the fuck is that?
01:53:22.000And if you could watch videos on it, you'd be like...
01:53:25.000If you just saw, I mean, we don't think of ourselves as being much different than people who, like, you know, today it's 2022. If you could go back to just 2002, there was nothing like that.
01:53:37.000I had a phone in 2002. 2002 was when Fear Factor was around.
01:55:49.000You know how, like, when you hear about this throughout history, like, the big changes happen, there's, like, great rejection of these changes.
01:57:08.000But I'm pretty sure that's what that was.
01:57:10.000I'm pretty sure let them eat cake meant the leftover scraps of bread that were left over when you put the batter into the cake tray, the bread tray, and it spilled over into the oven.
01:57:33.000Because the way the story's told is like they're like Marie Antoinette is like well if they're starving give them give them bread and then they're like there's no more bread well then give them cake like she was so right she was so like removed from poverty kind of both almost as what I'm reading.
01:58:00.000Okay, Brioche, bread enriched with butter and eggs, considered a luxury foe.
01:58:03.000The quote was taken to reflect the princess's frivolous disregard for serving peasants or her poor understanding of their plight.
01:58:13.000While the phrase is commonly attributed to Marie Antoinette, there are references to it prior to the French Revolution, meaning it is impossible for the quote to have originated from Antoinette and is unlikely that it was spoken by her.
01:58:29.000But what is when they talk about the scraps?
01:59:15.000The real story behind Let Them Eat Cake.
01:59:17.000This is the same thing as the brioche stuff.
01:59:19.000But does it, does, cake doesn't refer, see if you can find that, because I did read an article that said it was a, it was even grosser than let them eat cake.
02:00:01.000And I haven't been to Greece, because I think everything from that period of time called antiquity, I think from that period is probably the most impressive, but being in Rome...
02:00:15.000In America, when we have ancient sites, we kind of block them off a little bit.
02:01:13.000And the Italians stole the shit from the Greeks.
02:01:14.000That's the other thing about when you're in Rome and you're learning about it, you're like, oh, cultural appropriation just happens when shit is hot.
02:01:41.000Yeah, and people get mad at folks that fall in love with other cultures and, like, get really interested in whatever the fuck is that they make.
02:02:41.000I think there are a few terms you could use nowadays to just stop somebody from talking or stop somebody from maybe profiting on something.
02:02:48.000No, they just want to stop the argument and win.
02:03:28.000Screaming at some lady while you did some douchey shit in traffic and you want to divert from the fact that you're an asshole by calling her a colonizer.
02:03:39.000You could just call somebody something, make them radioactive, then you don't have to discuss anything with them, and then you could just be an asshole.
02:04:06.000There's no way that guy's really good at anything.
02:04:08.000Ladies and gentlemen, this is why we still do comedy.
02:04:12.000This is your Larry David moment, is that you still are affected by the world, and we need to talk about it, and we are irked, and we're pushed.
02:04:23.000Well, it's interesting because we have foes now, and wokeness is a foe of comedy.
02:04:29.000It's diametrically opposed to comedy, and it's absolutely killed comedy movies.
02:05:41.000My point is, like, what he's doing, you could never do if you had to run it by someone who was, like, a production company for a movie in 2022. They would never let you.
02:05:53.000But this is the good thing about the internet right now, and this is, like, why you gotta take advantage of it, is that because there's a void, there isn't a void in interest.
02:07:44.000They're both working together to give you the exact things that you want.
02:07:46.000But what you did is put some stuff on YouTube and then use that, the fame that you got from that, and then transfer it to this new thing, and then that new thing, which is just your website, it takes off.
02:07:59.000And it becomes hugely successful that you're just releasing your own thing, your own way.
02:08:04.000With help from my friends like you, obviously, and other people that want to push this and want to make this happen.
02:11:22.000When bacteria enters through a cut or scratch in the genitals and spreads through the bloodstream, some patients require skin grafts, but more extreme cases, such as Weinstein's, require an operation to remove the testicles!
02:11:37.000The deformity was first revealed in court when actress Jessica Mann, one of Weinstein's accusers, said she felt compassion for Weinstein after she saw his deformed genitalia, which appeared to have scarring as if from burns in his nether region.
02:11:52.000According to writer Phoebe Eaton, whose three-part series on Weinstein featured the current issue of Air Mail, Mann said that her first impression was that Weinstein might be intersex.
02:12:04.000Jurors at Weinstein's New York rape trial early this year were shown nude pictures of the disgraced movie mogul, including a full frontal shot showing his deformed penis.
02:12:14.000Among the side effects of the illness is erectile dysfunction.
02:12:31.000His assistants were often dispatched to the Secure Caverject, a drug that is directly injected into the penis before intercourse that can cause an erection.
02:14:38.000If it was like McGillicuddy Island and I'm...
02:14:43.000There's a lady named Karen McGillicuddy, and Karen McGillicuddy, she secured a bunch of these Russian gigolos, these underage boys, most of them like 16, 17, but they had fine working cocks, and they serviced these rich ladies.
02:14:58.000A lot of these rich ladies whose husbands left them money, but the husbands were assholes and they cheated on them and left them billions of dollars.
02:15:05.000So these ladies would skirt off to an island near the Bahamas and these guys would be flown in and they would dress up like sailors and just go down on their pussies.
02:16:56.000This was the bit was it was almost 10 years ago the bit was that if you see like a high school football coach that gets arrested because he was having sex with girls in the high school you'd be like that fucking piece of shit like that motherfucker needs to go to jail but if you see like some hot teacher in Florida getting taken away in handcuffs because she was banging a bunch of football players the first thing you think is which one of those pussies told his mom?
02:18:51.000The problem is that we know the rules are different, so then some lunatic comes on and they stretch the fact that the rules are different and then people start to listen to them because they're making a little bit of sense.
02:19:00.000But if we had just a little bit more wiggle room in things, I don't think I think the extremists even exist.
02:19:06.000The fact that everything's so rigid, only the loudest voices come out.
02:19:10.000If we just listened a little bit more to both sides, any fucking debate, abortion, anything like that, if we just listen a little bit more and we're like, yeah, I kind of get where they're coming from a little bit, you don't get the extreme voices.
02:19:21.000But when nobody's heard, the loudest voices are the only ones that make noise.
02:19:27.000What's also, people dig in their heels and defend their side and never want to look at how other people see things.
02:19:34.000It's like, people like, and this is something even like, like with the special, like I had a lot of like people reaching out asking me to come on their shows.
02:21:01.000I actually think, and this sounds crazy, but I actually think there's a little bit of heroism in those women that do that because they know no 16-year-old boy can satisfy them sexually.
02:22:26.000I know I'm not remembering this wrong, because I remember being in high school, and I think I was like 14 or 15 years old going, I don't think that's right.
02:22:39.000My limited understanding of orgasms have never been around one.
02:23:16.000Like, that's the worst thing you could tell a teenager who's feeling insecure and wants to satisfy a girl, and now he's gonna take the ultimate sacrifice.
02:23:23.000And the first time, like, a girl came with me, it was like me going down to my girlfriend when she was like 16 and I was 16. And I was like, well, obviously the fuck...
02:24:04.000I would jerk my dick in the shower, stop, I would pee, and then I would put my finger in front of the pee, and then I'd taste my finger to see, I was like, well, is this cum?
02:24:17.000And I swear to God, I swear to God in my life, I was tasting pee off my finger because I didn't know what an orgasm was.
02:25:36.000I don't want other guys, but theirs, I mean, we're so like intimate with them, like when we're going down on them, there's no, like the fluids are there.
02:25:44.000There's a girl, she's on a podcast, and she's talking to this guy about, she's a porn star, she's talking to this guy about how her boyfriend was asleep, and so she wanted to fuck her ex, so she ran down to the gas station.
02:26:07.000Yeah, I don't know if it's in Toronto or America, but she was saying her ex-boyfriend came inside of her, and then she came home, and then her current boyfriend ate her pussy and was talking about how good her pussy tasted.
02:29:47.000Well, Joey was trying to make it in Hollywood, right?
02:29:51.000Like he was trying to get a sitcom, be a movie, you know, and Think he was too concerned about that.
02:29:59.000He was too concerned about like having agents come to see him getting a manager like when you're just Scratching by and you're staying on your friend's couch like Joey was when I first met him It's like a fucking it's so the difference between being able to get an apartment and go to a restaurant and buy a meal and not It's like so delicate.
02:30:23.000There's such a balance that I think that fear held him back.
02:30:29.000And then one day, he just figured it out.
02:30:33.000And it coincided with him getting fat, which is wild, because he gave up on both things.
02:30:39.000He gave up on worrying what he looked like, and he gave up on worrying what people thought about him at the same time.
02:30:45.000He would fart into the microphone and just like it was nothing.
02:35:45.000But fucking Chris, there's the actress in the movie, I forget her fucking name, Natalie Portman, who's a brilliantly talented dramatic actress.
02:39:09.000It's not rotation where you're playing nine ball where you have to run one through nine.
02:39:13.000You could shoot any ball you want, and you leave one ball on the table, you make that ball, you use it to break up the other balls, and you keep running balls.
02:39:21.000And a really elite player can run 100 balls.
02:39:24.000That's like if you're a stand-up, you've been doing stand-up for 10 years, and you could headline clubs.
02:41:42.000There's a book called Playing Off the Rail, and it's about my friend, Tony Anagoni, and this guy, David McCumber, who was Hunter S. Thompson's editor.
02:41:56.000When Hunter S. Thompson, I forget what newspaper he wrote for, but McCumber was Hunter S. Thompson's editor, and they wrote a book together where my friend Tony, who was a top-flight pool player, they gave him, I think, it was a certain amount of money,
02:42:11.000like $10,000 or $20,000 in cash, and they taped it to their body and shit, and it traveled around the country playing the best players in the world and wrote a book about it.
02:42:22.000And my friend Tony, who was a really elite pool player, but very troubled guy, during COVID jumped off a bridge.
02:48:49.000I lived near this place, the Arc de Triomphe.
02:48:51.000Also the French Arc de Triomphe that they fucking love.
02:48:54.000That's a rip-off of the Roman one, so another reason why Paris sucks.
02:48:57.000But I lived by the Arc de Triomphe and there was a park there and there was all these older guys that would go play, I believe it's called Bocce Ball?
02:49:10.000And it gave me like this great hope because I was like, oh, when I'm 70, when I'm 70, I'm going to be able to hang out with my boys And have a shit talking game.
02:53:10.000There was all these people that were...
02:53:13.000Total misfits in the rest of society and they would go there and they would have camaraderie and I couldn't wait to go there.
02:53:21.000I would be on a date with my girlfriend and she'd be boring and I couldn't wait to drop her off at her apartment and head down to White Plains and see my boys.
02:53:29.000And we would play there till 4 or 5 in the morning and then we would go to the Star Diner in Mount Vernon.
02:54:21.000One pocket is a weird gambler's game where a pool table has six holes, but you would have one pocket to make your balls, and I would have one pocket to make my balls.
02:54:35.000And it's like the end pockets, like right where you rack the balls.
02:54:38.000I would have the right pocket, you'd have the left pocket.
02:54:42.000You've got to make sure that there's no shots for your opponent while you have shots and you're trying to bump balls and move them towards your hole.
02:54:49.000And you have to decide when to bust out and take a chance and fire balls in your hole.
02:54:53.000Because if you miss, then you leave it open for the other guy and you can just run out.
02:54:58.000And it's a very skillful game, so it's a game where a lot of people like for gambling.
02:55:03.000Because it reduces the amount of luck.
02:55:05.000Like with nine ball, there's a lot of luck in nine ball.
02:55:11.000Yeah, like, I guess we crave acceptance, all of us, in general, but, like, there's something about, like, and I think that this, like, inclusion within, like, the misfit communities exists in comedy as well.
02:55:22.000Like, you're with a bunch of comics, and, like, you feel free to say the wild things that the average civilian would maybe be uncomfortable around.
02:55:33.000And I think that, like, even, like, the green room, or the cellar, the back table, like, I'm sure the store, there's these things that exist, and it's like, Maybe at its core, it's just like, where can I be the closest version to myself?
02:55:46.000And if you see yourself kind of as a little bit of a misfit around all these other motherfuckers that are also misfits, there's liberty.
02:56:49.000I always wonder, like, the people who get consumed, and I felt a little bit of this, like, I don't want to, like, trash LA, because I think LA is actually cool, and I have, like, friends who are from there, but there was a little bit, like, I think culturally, because Hollywood is such an institution there, You gravitate to what is working, and whatever's working,
02:57:05.000regardless if it has merit, people value it.
02:57:08.000And naturally, as human beings, we're gonna gravitate to that thing.
02:57:11.000But I always wondered, like, are those people ever gonna experience what it's like to just fucking let loose?
03:03:20.000Like, what America did, if you go look at the Declaration of Independence, if you go look at the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and forget about the fact that a lot of those people, like, by today's standards, were horrible people.
03:03:41.000What they did was insanely revolutionary.
03:03:44.000What they did by setting up the system of government that we have, what they did by setting up the Bill of Rights and the First Amendment, the Second Amendment, all the different rights and rules and regulations in which to govern people by,
03:04:00.000and set it up as like fail-safes to stop tyranny.
03:05:58.000Like fucking July 4th, I was wearing a fucking American flag shirt and there was a protest going on and these ladies are screaming at me, abortion rights.
03:06:07.000And I'm like, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, lady.
03:06:20.000It's not just abortion rights, but now they're going after gay marriage too, which is so strange to me.
03:06:27.000Marco Rubio was saying that it was a silly thing to argue about, to be concerned about, and then some other senator who is a gay woman confronted him and she was furious at it.
03:06:47.000They want to affirm their love and their relationship.
03:06:51.000And the fact that they're going after that now almost makes me feel like they want us to fight.
03:06:59.000They want to divide us in the best way they can.
03:07:02.000This is the best way for them to keep pulling off all the bullshit they're doing behind the scenes is to get us to fight over things like gay marriage or get us to fight over things like abortion.
03:07:13.000It's just like, why are you removing freedoms?
03:07:30.000Like, if you're going to say that marriage is an important cultural institution to the fabric of America, you can't remove it from Americans.
03:07:43.000We create a family and we love one another and this is how we express our love and then say, ah, these Americans can't do that shit.
03:07:48.000It's so homophobic because you're saying there's something wrong with being homosexual.
03:07:52.000By saying that you are opposed to gay marriage, you're saying you're opposed to gay people.
03:07:57.000Because if gay people are in love with each other, and they want to have a celebration, and they want to be legally bonded and connected, and there's all sorts of benefits to that in terms of- Financial benefits.
03:10:05.000Just within this, like, tribal mindset where everything is black and white, what they do is they get votes by making everybody the absolute villain.
03:13:40.000To look at something and go, nine months, you should be able to do it.
03:13:43.000That's a little much, I think, for most people, if you're being honest.
03:13:45.000One week, We don't even know if it's gonna come to term.
03:13:49.000I think 25% of, I think, women that are pregnant end up having miscarriages.
03:13:54.000Some of them don't even know it because they think it might be their period.
03:13:57.000Like, it's a very common thing that happens.
03:13:59.000So, if we just had a little bit more, like, elasticity, and we could just be like, hey, I agree there's a point in time where, yeah, it definitely is a life and that'd be a little bit too much.
03:15:21.000It polarizes people in the opposite way.
03:15:23.000You know, there's a funny clip, not funny, but it's very telling, from Joe Biden, and it's from like the 1980s, where he said, abortion should be legal and it should be rare.
03:15:37.000And, you know, and that it's always tragic, but it should be rare.
03:15:43.000And it's, you know, it's very interesting because it's such a nuanced perspective in comparison to the way he talks about it now.
03:15:50.000And just the party, like the party has a line.
03:15:53.000Someone told me this of Elizabeth Warren, that what she does is she has interns that search on Twitter for how people think about things, and then that's what she runs with.
03:16:25.000And that's what scares people if you're talking about people's rights.
03:16:28.000If you're talking about a woman's right to choose, if you're talking about a gay person's right to be married.
03:16:33.000It's like, to have people, they have these rigid, poll-oriented perspectives on this, where I'm on the right-wing party, so I am going to say this because this is what my side believes and this is what my side wants.
03:16:50.000What if what if politics was like jury duty in that, like, we all acknowledge we don't want to do it, but it was our civic duty to society.
03:17:00.000So the first thing that qualifies you to be president is you not wanting to be president.
03:17:08.000And us literally having to force you as a society.
03:17:12.000And then you go, fucking A. I'll give it four fucking years.
03:18:03.000And when he was explaining how his situation works with taxes, that they would just tax a small percentage of speculation, of stock trading, just a tiny percentage of all these trades that are happening constantly, and that that money could go to education,
03:18:18.000that money could go to welfare, that money could go to all these different things that we'd use to benefit society.
03:21:31.000Well, first of all, there's the Bay of Pigs.
03:21:34.000There's a lot of people that were angry at him in the military.
03:21:40.000JFK was not a perfect person, but he was a fascinating public speaker.
03:21:45.000And the things that he talked about, the way he described America and our hopes and dreams, resonated with people that had a hope for the future.
03:21:54.000They had a vision in this guy, this young, vibrant guy who was the president.
03:22:00.000And when they shot and killed him, a lot of people were like, oh!
03:22:04.000And then when you realize it's most likely a grand conspiracy, Most likely.
03:22:11.000And you just wonder, like, what nefarious forces are trying to keep us from this thing that we all want, which is like an America that we could be proud of, a place where we see, like, intelligent, hardworking, like,
03:22:28.000kind, compassionate people that can run the world in a better place, in a better way than it's being run now.
03:23:10.000Ladies and gentlemen, the very word secrecy is repugnant in a free and open society.
03:23:18.000And we are, as a people, inherently and historically opposed to secret societies, to secret oaths, and to secret proceedings.
03:23:28.000We decided long ago that the dangers of excessive and unwarranted concealment of pertinent facts far outweigh the dangers which are cited to justify it.
03:23:41.000Even today, there is little value in opposing the threat of a closed society by imitating its arbitrary restrictions.
03:23:50.000Even today, there is little value in ensuring the survival of our nation if our traditions do not survive with it.
03:23:59.000And there is very grave danger that an announced need for increased security will be seized upon by those anxious to expand its meaning to the very limits of official censorship and concealment.
03:24:14.000That I do not intend to permit to the extent that it's in my control.
03:24:19.000And no official of my administration, whether his rank is high or low, civilian or military, Should interpret my words here tonight as an excuse to censor the news, to stifle dissent, to cover up our mistakes,
03:24:34.000or to withhold from the press and the public the facts they deserve to know.
03:24:40.000For we are opposed around the world by a monolithic and ruthless conspiracy that relies primarily on covet means.
03:24:50.000For expanding its sphere of influence, on infiltration instead of invasion, on subversion instead of elections, on intimidation instead of free choice, on guerrillas by night instead of armies by day.
03:25:07.000It is a system which has conscripted vast human and material resources into the building of a tightly knit, highly efficient machine, That combines military, diplomatic, intelligence, economic,
03:25:43.000No president should fear public scrutiny of his program, for from that scrutiny comes understanding, and from that understanding comes support or opposition, and both are necessary.
03:25:55.000I am not asking your newspapers to support an administration, but I am asking your help in the tremendous task of informing and alerting the American people, for I have complete confidence And the response and dedication of our citizens,
03:26:19.000I not only could not stifle controversy among your readers, I welcome it.
03:26:24.000This administration intends to be candid about its errors, for as a wise man once said, an error doesn't become a mistake until you refuse to correct it.
03:26:35.000We intend to accept full responsibility for our errors, and we expect you to point them out when we miss them.
03:26:43.000Without debate, without criticism, no administration and no country can succeed, and no republic can survive.
03:26:51.000That is why the Athenian lawmaker Sola decreed a crime for any citizen to shrink from controversy.
03:26:59.000And that is why our press was protected by the First Amendment, the only business in America specifically protected by the Constitution, not primarily to amuse and entertain, Not to emphasize the trivial and the sentimental,
03:27:16.000not to simply give the public what it wants, but to inform, to arouse, to reflect, to state our dangers and our opportunities, to indicate our crises and our choices, to lead, mold,
03:27:31.000educate, and sometimes even anger public opinion.
03:27:36.000This means greater coverage and analysis of international news, For it is no longer far away and foreign, but close at hand and local.
03:27:47.000It means greater attention to improved understanding of the news, as well as improved transmission.