In this episode of the Joe Rogan Experience, Joe and his good friend Ari talk about how they got into fitness, how they met, and why they started working out. They also talk about the benefits of cardio and how it can make you more productive and less stressed out. Joe also talks about why he thinks cardio is better than other forms of exercise and why he doesn t need to work out as much as he does. Joe and Ari also discuss how cardio can help with anxiety and stress and how to deal with it in a healthy way. Joe also gives some tips on how to get rid of stress and anxiety in your life and why you should be doing cardio to help with it. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts and leave us a rating and review! It helps spread the word to other podcasters and podcasters looking for awesome podcasters to get their pod out there. Thanks for listening and supporting the pod! - Joe & Ari Check it out! Cheers, Joe Rogans Podcast! See ya later, next week! XOXO, Tom and Ari! <333 - The Rogans Experience xoxo - - Tom & Ari Rogans - The Jerks Podcast . - Cheers! Joe (and Ari's YouTube channel: and Ari's Insta: , , and Ari s Insta : & Ari's insta: . . And Ari s podcast: . and Ari s insta :) Tom s Instapod: and his insta story: ) ... Jake s Instafood Podcast: & his podcast: . , and his podcast is is , his podcast of course, and his podcast & Podcasts: ( ) & more! and all of his podcast, @ AND Thank you for listening to this podcast? : and more I hope you enjoy this podcast, and I love you guys are having a good time! , I'm looking forward to talking about this podcast! :) - Thank you, Ari s Podcast, and more and more, and much more! - Joe s Podcasts, etc. - and more soon, Joe s podcast will be better than any other podcast you'll get a chance to know more about it!
00:01:12.000I mean, I might have been behind for like a day.
00:01:16.000In the beginning, we were trying to figure out how much we were going to burn.
00:01:19.000Because we were using this MyZones thing, so it's like you wear a chest strap.
00:01:24.000And the chest strap gives you points with the application for however many minutes you are at 80% of your max heart rate versus 90% of your max heart rate, like 90 is 2 points, 80 is 1 or something like that.
00:02:31.000We were talking a lot of shit to each other, and Tom got sick, Tom got the flu, and then the day he got better from the flu, he ran 13 miles.
00:03:40.000So one of the things we talked about, Tom and I talked about specifically, was that When you do a lot of cardio in a day, like four hours of cardio in a day, he goes, all the internal chatter just goes away.
00:04:23.000It, like, balances out what's really important to think about and worry about versus, like, things that are just sort of bouncing around in your head.
00:04:32.000You don't know if I should pay attention to that one or that one, and what should I freak out about the most?
00:04:37.000Like, every time I watch the news, every time I look at the news, I'm like, how engaged do I get here?
00:06:55.000You read that thing that Malcolm Gladwell talked about with, like, the honor societies that lived in, like, Appalachia and how many of them were involved in feuds that led to, like, mass murders?
00:07:09.000But the psychology behind this, the most fascinating thing, he was saying that these people come, like, they emigrated from a part of the world Where they were herders, like they're herded animals.
00:07:21.000And when you herded animals, you had a very different reaction to transgressions than someone who like say was a farmer.
00:07:30.000Because someone couldn't steal your farm.
00:09:12.000To the point, we were talking about this the other day.
00:09:14.000When is there going to be, like, I don't know how this works, but I know that when they do a genetic test, they can find out some of your family's from Eastern Europe.
00:09:22.000You have this percentage of Eastern Europe genes, this percentage of genes from Asia.
00:09:27.000They can do that with, like, a 23andMe, right?
00:12:36.000Because a lot of those Boston comics, like, they had good civil service jobs, and then they would do stand-up at night, and they'd be driving up to Maine with us on a Tuesday night, making 75 bucks, and then they'd have to get up the next morning and do their real job.
00:12:51.000Well, the thing about Boston is, like, if you're a bum, they make you feel like shit.
00:12:59.000And so if you're going to just become a comic and you're going to quit your job at the post office, you know how hard your uncle worked to get you that job at the post office?
00:13:44.000And everything with people where people can get into a position of power and control other people and decide, like, what other people can and can't do.
00:14:13.000Yeah, it'll cost us this amount of money to move our plan over there But we'll get these people over there to work they work for almost nothing and that's what's really happening right now Yeah, it's because money became more important.
00:14:31.000If you're doing well, like if you're the head of a corporation, you're doing well, what is this constant need to make more money next year?
00:15:49.000As you were the guy that was working the hardest and being the best at it.
00:15:52.000But because of that, you've decided to open a comedy club that I know you're not going to make a lot of money in, but you're going to do it because it's a great building, developmental experience for young comics.
00:16:52.000With comedy, man, the thing about it that I enjoy the most is the camaraderie and the fun and the new material and the putting on the good shows and having a good time with everybody.
00:17:04.000And I'm like, that is something that...
00:17:08.000I feel like when I moved here I'm like I want to invest in that.
00:17:11.000Not just like invest in it in the sense of like do it all the time and do a lot of shows with my friends like you guys last night and you know we're gonna do Atlanta this weekend like just but also like to set a place where it's like encouraged supported and then you know that if you there's a clear path now it used to be you had to get a guy to help you and go on the road And,
00:17:37.000you know, maybe if you did well at the club, they'd have you back to feature, and you ground it out for as many years as you could, and you try to get TV credits.
00:17:45.000And some guys got TV credits before they really could headline, like me.
00:17:49.000I had TV credits before I could headline.
00:17:54.000Because I really didn't have 45 solid minutes.
00:17:58.000But now, with all these podcasts, particularly like with Kill Tony and all these other comedy podcasts, like if you're in the group of people and everybody talks about you and we're all having fun, we're doing shows together, you just get entered into the ecosystem.
00:18:14.000Then you get featured on podcast, and then you get whatever it is, a Netflix.
00:18:47.000I know people that are like regular folks that will say woke shit either on stage or on Twitter because they want to affirm that they're in a part of this group of people that will continue to work in Hollywood.
00:19:00.000So it's like, man, why are you saying that?
00:19:05.000You're saying this nonsensical fucking silly virtue signaling shit that everybody else says, but I know you're only doing it because you want to stay inside this group of people.
00:19:17.000Yeah, and if your morality or your politics lines up with that type of thinking, do a joke that shows it.
00:21:49.000If he was the LeBron James of quarterbacks, if he was just like this undeniable motherfucker of motherfucker quarterbacks, I bet he would have got away with it.
00:22:46.000You've got thousands of configurations of plays in your head that you're communicating to ten other guys in the ten seconds you have in that huddle, and then you have choices.
00:22:58.000You've got scenario A, scenario B, scenario C, scenario D, and you're scanning all of it like a supercomputer.
00:23:05.000While fucking 280 pound guys are running at you.
00:23:09.000And you have to have like laser pinpoint precision with a spiraling ball.
00:23:48.000Because he went to Southern Mississippi University or some college and his daughter's going there and she's a volleyball player and they needed a new gym or like a stadium for volleyball games.
00:24:00.000And so he talked to the governor and they arranged to siphon money out of a fund that was like a welfare fund meant to feed poor people.
00:25:43.000That needs to be addressed whenever it comes to football players, fighters, combat sports athletes, is that people with CTE oftentimes have very poor decision making.
00:25:55.000It's very complex because everybody's version and severity of CTE is different.
00:26:03.000But one of the side effects of having too many concussions is you become very impulsive.
00:26:09.000And you start doing risky things, risky behaviors.
00:26:13.000Sometimes people get addicted to substances and gambling and a lot of wild shit.
00:26:18.000And it comes from like your brain being rattled.
00:26:28.000So I think risky things like this might have been exciting, you know?
00:26:33.000Like, you should have obviously morally known that's not the thing to do, but there's something, I think, for guys that have been hitting the head too many times, like risky things, like, oh, they just want...
00:26:44.000If you're a guy and you've got all your jollies out of playing football, I mean you get all your jollies out of being this badass fucking quarterback or some badass running back and the amount of excitement On Super Bowl Day must be unfathomable to us mere mortals.
00:27:03.000To us mere mortals, the excitement of being on that field and knowing that millions of people are going to be watching around the world.
00:28:05.000There's a lot going on, and retiring from that has got to be incredibly difficult.
00:28:14.000And that pales in comparison to someone who they ship overseas to fight in war and then bring them back to America and then just say, alright, you're done.
00:29:33.000That's why they found that with trauma, with PTSD with soldiers, they found a thing called EMDR, which is a way of doing therapy that doesn't involve talk.
00:30:11.000I go, all right, let's give it a shot.
00:30:12.000So on my old studio, I lay down the couch and he talked me through like this, I forget exactly how he did it, but we went through this thing like, you know, you're going to be relaxed.
00:30:25.000And next thing you know, I was in like a state of mind.
00:30:28.000I was like, this is really fascinating.
00:30:30.000It's almost like you have access with someone else.
00:30:35.000When someone helps you and guides you, you have access to a state of mind that you don't achieve independently, or I didn't know how to achieve independently.
00:33:14.000They'd say psychologically it's a great place to start.
00:33:16.000Like when you come into a shrink and you negotiate the price you're going to pay them, that's the first step of your therapy because they can tell so much about you by your relationship to money.
00:35:57.000But for podcasts and comedy, if I started thinking about goals where I want to be in four years and this and that, then I'd be thinking about that instead of thinking about new material.
00:36:07.000Or I'd be thinking about that instead of thinking about, I want to be stimulated by this kind of guest.
00:36:13.000I want to talk to this guy about this subject.
00:36:15.000I'm watching this documentary and maybe I can get him to expand on that and explain it to me.
00:36:28.000Every time I've been frustrated with where I'm at career-wise, I write some new shit, I go to the club, I do it, and all of a sudden something happens.
00:36:37.000It's not necessarily like there's some talent agent with a cigar in the back going, this kid's a star!
00:36:43.000It's just more of an energy that you're putting out because your juices are flowing and your confidence is up because you're realizing what you're capable of.
00:37:20.000And then the universe will reward you.
00:37:23.000That feeling of resistance, the feeling you get when you write something new that you know is going to be funny is one of the best feelings ever.
00:38:01.000If I could just sit there for two hours, just two hours, just drink some coffee, smoke a little weed, and just sit there for two hours, something's gonna happen, man.
00:39:04.000I think you just decide that you're this person that fucks things up and you continue to fuck things up because that's your past.
00:39:11.000One thing I've said before that I had to learn very early on Because, you know, when I was a kid, I got bullied a lot and, you know, I was kind of very timid and worried about people kicking my ass because we moved around a lot.
00:39:27.000And then in the process of becoming a martial artist, I realized, like, I would still get nervous when I was around people who bullied me before when I was younger.
00:39:36.000I should have been just like, hey, fuckface, but I was still nervous around them, even though I knew I could kill them.
00:39:42.000I was still nervous around them because I programmed myself to feel like a loser when I was in this town when I was around these people when I was in like a certain like I had like a Triggered memory and I was like oh And it made me realize like you can decide you are your worst failures or you can decide that you're you you're you right now Don't hold on to that.
00:41:08.000That's a beautiful moment that everyone's denied.
00:41:12.000You're not going to see that YouTube video.
00:41:14.000You're only going to see the video of that guy who deserved it getting his ass kicked.
00:41:17.000And for that guy, that moment, when people experience a bad moment in their life, That moment when it's something as brutal as getting your ass kicked when you deserved it, that could fucking define you forever.
00:41:32.000Well, not only as a kid, but I think about...
00:41:35.000We were talking about guys and women that have gone on SNL, and after a year or two, it doesn't work out, and then they just become ghosts in the comedy world.
00:41:47.000Who didn't even get on the show, but had a traumatic experience of almost getting on the show, and how he dealt with that, and how he recovered, and how he rose from those ashes, and how he got stronger.
00:41:59.000And then you got the guys that are still, that's still their credit, that they were on SNL, and you're like, I don't remember you on SNL, and it was like 12 years ago, and they never got back on the horse again.
00:42:10.000That SNL thing is a totally different environment, and if you've ever heard Jim Brewer talk about it, Jim talked about on this podcast that he would come up with premises for sketches and he'd be working on a sketch and so you have to put in like a database everything you're working on and other writers would steal those premises and write their own sketches on those premises and just like take just hamstring them yeah and he confronted them and there was like yelling and screaming and Eventually his wife talked him into leaving but Jim
00:42:40.000Brewer is a great example though of a guy Who, because he left Saturday Night Live, people kind of slept on him.
00:42:47.000And they forgot that he's one of the best comics alive.
00:44:46.000Is why people want to ignore the fact that it's always done this.
00:44:50.000Like humans have, without a doubt, we have an effect on that.
00:44:54.000With carbon emissions are up and who knows what the fuck the gas is in the air and all the crazy shit we do with mass production and energy consumption.
00:46:36.000It's hot this time of year, said Doris in 1822. We don't have satellite Doppler radar from 1822. So we have this window of a couple of hundred years of people paying attention and writing shit down.
00:46:49.000But then when they do core samples of the Earth and they find the Earth's temperature, they try to do the calculations over thousands of years.
00:47:34.000Dude, there's a lot of cities like Miami, they're already saying, like, when there's a full moon and a high tide, the fucking downtown is, like, underwater.
00:48:20.000They would consult with people to try to figure out if someone's going to default on their loans, if they're going to sell them property right there on the beach.
00:48:27.000Because of, you know, the insurance companies get involved.
00:49:33.000But what's nice is like, when I think about how many times me and my jackass friends have gone to Vegas, and you always come home feeling like had.
00:49:41.000You just feel that emptiness of like leaving a strip club of like, what did I just do?
00:49:46.000And then you think you could spend that same money and go to a place like New Orleans or Nashville, where there's like a real culture, where there's like real shit that's...
00:49:56.000Well, that's why people like to visit Austin, go see the live music.
00:52:14.000I mean, you're my best friend, and no one's ever thrown me a birthday party, and I figured if I was going to come to anybody, I'd come to you.
00:52:20.000Just really like it to be at Wow Wings.
00:54:38.000She's just fully committed to social justice and prison reform.
00:54:43.000She's really kind of a beautiful soul in that regard.
00:54:46.000She's a very, very wealthy woman who's committed to philanthropy, and she's spending all this money, billions of dollars on affordable housing, on really cool stuff.
00:54:55.000It's really cool to see what she's doing.
00:56:49.000That's what you do when you get that kind of cash.
00:56:50.000Well, there was an article in The New Yorker about these super yachts, and it said that there was some guy that was like, it's the ultimate way of saying, oh, you got a house in the Hamptons, I got a house in the Hamptons.
00:59:48.000Well, that's one of the things in the bit where I was saying, like, you know the guy, like, you know, who she wants him to be is like this cool science teacher.
00:59:57.000But you can't be that once you're married a lady worth $39 billion.
01:02:20.000He had done it with a number of women.
01:02:22.000There was a show once where they were following this guy who got scammed by those guys pretending to be women online and engaging in relationships with men where they'll send them correspondence and photos and talk to them.
01:03:01.000and i think he was a widower and he was like in his 60s and he went to europe twice to meet with this woman and every time she had an excuse why she couldn't meet him and he went back again and the the girl's daughter was just so despondent because he's all of his money he didn't have much but all his money he's sending to her he's sending her twenty thousand dollars she has to get out of this and that and some people are coming after her She's really in trouble and she owes money.
01:03:41.000Wasn't even like physical contact, right?
01:03:43.000Yeah, but a physical contact scam where someone could pretend they love you and you're lonely and like finally my prayers have been answered.
01:03:49.000This person who's so amazing and then everyone's like, listen, I think Mark might be full of shit.
01:05:32.000And if you don't get that love from people...
01:05:34.000I remember when I moved to LA in 94...
01:05:38.000I came out here to do this television show and we were out here for like two weeks and I was staying in the Oakwood Gardens apartments and I didn't have any friends so I'd go to the Comedy Store at night and I would hang out there and I'd try to do a set and I was what's called a non-paid regular which means I could go up after the show because Mitzi wasn't sure about me yet and so I was doing that and I had no real interaction with anybody and then this girl that I was working with One of the other actresses on the set,
01:08:10.000They just look up at you like, I'm so excited you're about to make me laugh, as opposed to being in LA where the arms are crossed and they're like, you're not Sebastian Maniscalco.
01:08:25.000Texas has real people in them, and I didn't think that was a thing.
01:08:28.000I thought, you know, I go here, I have a good time, that's fun, but there is a general attitude that people have here that is way healthier.
01:09:26.000Oh, when I was upstairs watching Brian Simpson last night, and he goes, so I lived in LA, but I just moved out here from California, and a guy, under his breath, just goes, fuck you.
01:11:25.000I won't say what hotel, but you put me in a very nice hotel here in town.
01:11:29.000And I walked past the lobby and these two guys, no, four guys, and they all had the dress shirts on and they all look like they do like, what do you call that workout now?
01:14:13.000He found something he's good at, that he loves, and he found a way to wake up every morning and go, let's fucking imagine, let's play, let's do this.
01:14:25.000And he was so consistent in how he did it that he got to, whoa, are they all changing or are you doing that?
01:14:41.000But the point being is like he was just so consistent and so disciplined that he just consistently put them out and now he's making hundreds of millions of dollars doing this.
01:16:25.000If you bought one of his art displays and it's like that, but it's like seven feet tall, and you could put it in your living room, people would come over and go, whoa!
01:16:34.000That's a real, valuable, cool thing, a piece of art.
01:21:38.000They just decided I'm gonna kill them and no one could do damn thing about it.
01:21:41.000They'll just beat you to death in front of everybody in the middle of like a dining hall and no one stops it and you realize like, well this is what people did to each other back then.
01:21:49.000And if someone just decides that you've dishonored the queen with your jester ways, they're just gonna chop your dick off in front of everybody and stuff it in your mouth while you scream and bleed out on the stairs to the throne.
01:22:03.000And they barely pay attention because they see it every day.
01:22:06.000They're not even aghast by your death.
01:22:12.000The whole myth of Dracula, the Dracula story, the Bram Stoker version of Dracula, came out of this legend of Vlad the Impaler.
01:22:22.000Vlad Tepes, who was a guy who was a real guy who lived, who used to torture the enemy and impaled him on spikes in front of him while he ate dinner.
01:24:03.000And then there's one called the Glasgow Smile or something where they take a knife and they cut your cheeks from the corners of your mouth up so for the rest of your life you look like you're smiling.
01:24:52.000And they would take people and they would hack their arms and legs off and while they were alive, throw them on a fire to watch them squirm.
01:25:02.000The last moments of your life, no arms, they would just hold you down and just immediately hack off your arms, hack off your legs, and then just chuck you on the fire.
01:26:30.000I mean, it's just, you know, it's like a romanticizing it in a lot of our eyes because everybody, you know, like romanticizes the idea of being a Plains Indian.
01:26:39.000Wow, it must have been incredible, sleeping under the stars.
01:26:41.000But the people that they did capture and release back in society, they didn't want that.
01:27:05.000There was some miners that struck deals with them, and various people that had made their way across the plain decided to join.
01:27:12.000And, you know, if you got a good band of Indians that didn't want to kill you because you're a white settler, if you're in the right place at the right time and you joined in, like, for them it was like a better way of life.
01:27:24.000No, and trying to paint the Indians as good or bad, that's not how it is.
01:27:43.000The Nez Perce were famous for cannibalizing the victims that they captured.
01:27:49.000People did horrible things in all ethnicities, in all parts of the world.
01:27:55.000In the barbaric times of human history, people have done absolutely terrible things to each other, to people that look like them, to people that look nothing like them.
01:28:05.000It's just like a part of being a human being or has been a part of being a human being.
01:28:11.000I think like less now because we're more recognizing the horrific nature that we get to discuss it.
01:28:17.000Because everybody kind of gets to talk now because of the internet, because of education.
01:28:22.000It's way harder to pull off a Christopher Columbus-type atrocity in 2022 and selling it to the public, like what they did.
01:28:41.000Bro, what those people did, like, you read the priests' accounts of how they tortured the natives when they got here, and what they did, like, bashed babies' heads on rocks and told people if they don't bring them their weight in gold, they would cut their arms off, cut their arms off,
01:28:57.000and show the other people that they're willing to do it, and then send them out, get more gold.
01:29:00.000Like, That was just how people behaved, which is hard for us to think about because of the world we currently live in.
01:29:13.000But if the power went out and shit went sideways for just six months, just six months, Do you know how crazy the world would be?
01:29:22.000How crazy was the world during, like, the BLM riots during COVID, where people were walking down the street throwing rocks into people's windows and smashing doors open and doing whatever the fuck they wanted to do for no...
01:30:09.000Like, that's how thin the veneer of civilization is over the world.
01:30:14.000For most of history, they behaved the way those clans, the Plains Indians did, and the way Columbus did, and the way the Mongols did, and the way the Romans did.
01:30:25.000Like, for most of history, people were cunts.
01:30:31.000Yeah, and you think about this country like kids that were born, you know, just after us, that didn't experience the Vietnam War at all, like have not seen barbarism in this country.
01:30:42.000Short of the people that have gone to the Middle East that saw some horrible shit, for the most part, they've been guarded from that.
01:30:47.000And I mean, obviously school shootings and, you know, the amount of homicides that take place is something, but that can't compare to the kind of barbarism that you're talking about.
01:30:57.000Yeah, the school shootings, it's like, The reason why they're so horrific is because they're an aberration.
01:31:02.000And the worst, most horrific aberration, someone who wants to kill purely innocent people.
01:31:29.000The horrific things that people have done throughout history It's so fascinating how recent that was because it really was only like a few lives ago.
01:31:39.000Like if you want to go to the the plains of Texas and the plains of North America in 1700, you are in a wild world.
01:35:30.000You know, bodybuilders, but they're fucking beautiful.
01:35:33.000Like, they're big-ass bodybuilders, but there's something beautiful about them.
01:35:38.000You know, the way they've sculpted their bodies to be a certain way?
01:35:41.000And some of them get, like, fake tits and a fake tan, and they're on steroids, but you go like, wow, that's a version of the human body I hadn't thought of.
01:37:37.000Doesn't Aaron from, what's his name, from Stained, Aaron Lewis, doesn't he have don't tread on me tattooed on his neck?
01:37:44.000You should get a Colombian necktie tattoo.
01:37:47.000As a Brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt, I would never have Don't Tread On Me tattooed on my neck because it would just be way too inviting for people to choke me.
01:37:55.000That's all they would be going for now.
01:44:13.000Some surfer, who's apparently like a famous surfer, just got killed in a bar fight where some guy punched him and he fell and hit his head and died.
01:44:22.000And I talk about this all the time, that people think it's safe to hit someone and just knock them out in a bar.
01:45:19.000But, you know, Kevin James, when he was a bouncer at a bar in New York, and one of the guys that he worked with got in a fight with some patron, knocked him out, and died.
01:45:45.000I don't know if it was manslaughter or second-degree murder or what they convict you on, but fuck, man.
01:45:51.000I was watching a video of these guys that robbed some kid, 21-year-old kid in New York, just walked up to him and just blasted him in the face and knocked him unconscious, and the kid falls.
01:46:00.000Onto the curb and hits his head and he was dead in five days and you know they're trying to find the kids who did it I don't know if they found him but it's like imagine they got twenty dollars from him they stole twenty bucks Just knocking some out and not understanding.
01:46:16.000Like, you might as well just be shooting them because you could very easily kill someone this way.
01:46:53.000There's also a lot of people talking about neck punches now, throat punches, instead of punching someone in the face and they think, Well, yeah, but...
01:47:38.000Or you get hit in the temple, a lot of times people get shut off.
01:47:41.000And when you get shut off and you fall back, that's the most dangerous.
01:47:45.000You definitely, I mean, it's not good to get punched in the neck, but it's not like a smart strategy or boxers just be punching each other in the neck.
01:47:52.000You know, they kind of a little bit do that, but it's just really like accidentally.
01:48:10.000Because if you think of someone throwing their shin up at you and where their shin is going to contact with the side of your neck, that shuts people right off.
01:48:18.000That's how Kamaru Usman got knocked out by Leon Edwards.
01:48:23.000I think that one actually might have hit his head.
01:48:25.000But it was like the head, like right where the neck meets the head.
01:48:32.000Getting hit in the head is fucking horrible for you.
01:49:04.000I heard that there was evidence that was not allowed about a cocaine dealer who had sold him a pretty good quantity of cocaine just before the killing.
01:50:32.000The moment that we're on like the 11th hole, and I'm standing over a putt, and I just look at him and I go, OJ, if I sink this, you gotta tell me if you did it.
01:52:06.000Like, you know, you're from here, and then all of a sudden you're there, and you're in this guy's town or whatever, and you're a part of a military...
01:52:18.000Some sort of an action that they're doing that day.
01:52:23.000And you find yourself in a hand-to-hand combat with some guy.
01:57:34.000What if you're OJ, you're this guy that was in Naked Gun, and you were in Hertz commercials running through the airport, and you were a superstar athlete, and you were a great dude to everybody that ever talked to him.
01:59:46.000They found when he was like 19 years old, he had committed, he had murdered some drug dealers or something like that, and they incorporated him into the CIA program where they trained him to kill people.
02:07:08.000And we'd bring eggs, and we'd go crazy.
02:07:11.000And so she sprayed in my eye, so I can't see that well, and I chase what I thought was him, knocked him down, I'm sitting on top of him, and I punch him in the face, and then everybody's screaming, and they pull me up, they're like, dude, it's a girl!
02:07:38.000And then that winter, we were at the Tarrytown Lakes, which is, they would freeze over in the winter.
02:07:45.000And they had these big telephone poles, and they had floodlights, and they had speakers, and they would play AM radio, and they had a big heated shack.
02:07:54.000You'd change your skates, and during the day you'd play hockey, and then at night we'd all show up, and they would light it, and they'd stay up until like 11 o'clock at night, and that was like our social life in the winter, and we'd skate.
02:08:04.000And, you know, you'd hide some beers in the snowbank, and you'd get fucked up, and you'd try to make out with the girl, and so it was great.
02:08:12.000So I go there, and I'm like 13, and they go, oh yeah, that's so-and-so, she's got a crush on you.
02:10:38.000But it taps into that world of like they live in, I think it's Birmingham, which I guess has a lot of Irish that have moved in and a lot of like gypsy influence.
02:11:40.000Because I knew that I had a friend who lived in the UK, and one of her friends from the UK was telling her that this band of gypsies just moved into an abandoned lot on their street.
02:11:50.000They just pulled in and just, we live here now.
02:15:03.000Like, if you get involved in that kind of crazy level of relationship where you're cutting each other and carrying each other's blood around, like, where does that go?
02:15:27.000I think you should maybe wait till you're 65, and then finally, you got her doggy style, and you go to put it in, and she just goes, finally!
02:16:26.000From one guy's butt, and one guy, like, apparently, like, he was internally bleeding, because they're doing such rigorous, awful stuff to their assholes.
02:17:15.000I met these two guys at a show once in Connecticut, and I had a joke about two guys having anal sex.
02:17:21.000And they wanted to come up to me after the show, and they go, we thought you were really funny, but we want you to know that a lot of gay people don't have anal sex.
02:19:34.000In Vancouver, the mushrooms are legal, so I walked into this shop called the Fungi Shop.
02:19:40.000It had the mushrooms on it, and there's a girl working behind the counter, and she's got on a yellow tube top and fucking pink hair and piercings, and she's...
02:20:41.000And then when we got back to town, we realized there was a film noir festival that was happening at this little indie theater that we had seen before.
02:20:50.000And we walk in and the movie was starting in five minutes.
02:20:52.000And we saw a double feature film noir as I'm Coming Down.
02:21:10.000Yeah, one was called Something Highway.
02:21:16.000It was in San Francisco, and it was about these guys that had gotten a big load of apples, and they were bringing it from the country to San Francisco.
02:21:33.000There was one scene where this guy is engaged to this girl and she's like, you know, she seems really sweet and they kind of play it that everything is really cool between them.
02:21:47.000And then he meets a prostitute in San Francisco and he sleeps with her.
02:24:44.000That's one of those movies that I haven't told my son to watch yet because, like, that's one of the...
02:24:48.000You'll find this with your daughters as they get older is when they get to start to watch, like, the first time you sit and watch The Godfather with them in movies like that.
02:24:56.000Well, you probably had it with like...
02:31:21.000It's like the worst idea ever for someone trying to recover.
02:31:24.000I mean, there's a reason why it's Alcoholics Anonymous.
02:31:27.000Part of the reason why it's anonymous is that you don't want to hold somebody up as a role model for sobriety because if they then lose their sobriety, it fucks up people that were looking to them.
02:31:43.000You're supposed to look to yourself and your higher power.
02:33:07.000It was regular people, but you would call them and you would stage an intervention with somebody and they would think that the TV crew was following them around about something else.
02:34:08.000If you think about as crazy as you've ever been in your life, like what's the worst you've ever been and how much further could it have gone if you didn't self-correct?
02:34:15.000If you didn't course-correct in your life, would you ever have gotten to the point where you were one of those people that can't get off the couch because you're 600 pounds?
02:34:22.000Would you be one of those people that gambles away every fucking penny you have no matter what?
02:34:26.000And that you're in debt and you're terrified and you're like Adam Sandler in Rough Cut Gems or Uncut Gems?
02:35:03.000That was so well done and well written.
02:35:05.000You could see the thrill in, like, the winning.
02:35:07.000Like, occasionally he would win, and then he would lose, and when he'd lose, he'd fucking devastated, but when he'd win, he'd be like, Fuck yeah!
02:35:26.000He would gamble on, like my friend wrote on one of his shows, and he would gamble if there was no pro football or basketball or whatever, he would be betting on girls' high school basketball.
02:35:53.000Yeah, the thrill of gambling is apparently one of the most difficult to kick.
02:35:58.000People with gambler problems, Gamblers Anonymous, and I think it's a lot, like we were talking about with the football players, is the high, obviously it's not comparable, but their high, that's their highest of highs, is winning at gambling.
02:36:12.000And then the thrill of chasing money and the wondering whether or not you're going to succeed and then losing it and then dodging the bookies and trying to go to another casino and gather up a stake.
02:36:22.000Well, that's what they say is a huge part of it is it's actually the losing as much as the winning.
02:38:21.000There was this guy who was a father of...
02:38:24.000My daughter was on a soccer team, and one of the girl's fathers used to come to the games, and he had a brand new red Corvette, and he always had on shiny clothes, and he was a professional gambler.
02:38:33.000And he would tell me about, like, I'm going to Vegas, he plays poker, and he makes money.
02:38:38.000And every week, I fucking love talking to this guy.
02:40:30.000And then he goes to Gary Marshall, who plays the manager of the casino, and he's trying to pitch to him, what if I do a commercial for you guys and I say, hey, look, you gave the money back to a customer.
02:41:59.000And so he grew up and his best friend growing up in Beverly Hills was Rob Reiner.
02:42:04.000And so Carl Reiner is on The Tonight Show one night with Johnny Carson and Carson goes, who do you think is, I mean, you work with Mel Brooks, you've been with the greats, like, who's the funniest person that you know?
02:42:17.000And he said, my 15 year old son's friend, Albert Einstein.
02:43:49.000And if he liked you, I mean, yeah, comedians talked about it.
02:43:52.000They said that all you had to do was tell a club booker that you did the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and all of a sudden your money went from $1,500 a week to $15,000.
02:44:04.000Didn't Howard Stern have a famous feud with him?
02:44:11.000That was one of those weird times where if one of those guys crossed you, if you were in a bad situation with one of those guys, it's not that many people.
02:44:19.000Joan Rivers was the guest host for him forever.
02:44:22.000And then Fox gave her her own talk show and he was outraged that she would compete against him.
02:44:29.000And he never had her back on the show.
02:54:47.000Laying in your bed at night, reading Lord of the Rings, or Lying the Witch in the Wardrobe, or one of those books, and you just get sucked in.
02:58:00.000And they had, like, a room upstairs above this social club, and they would take guys to the room upstairs and just chop them up in the bathtub, and they would kill people, like, constantly.
02:58:11.000It was killing, like, a hundred people.
02:58:33.000Yeah, first-rate story of a mafia murder crew so deadly that even John Gotti turned aside a contract on its leader.
02:58:39.000New York Daily News reports Mustaine and Capecci, co-authors Mobstar 1989, tell a fascinating and repellently detailed story of Roy DeMeo and the gang he raised from teenagers in Carnese, a Brooklyn neighborhood where death by natural causes is six bullets in the head,
02:59:44.000One murder led so easily to another that soon the Gemini method was used on anybody who got in the gang's way or annoyed them.
02:59:53.000DeMeo presented three of his co-crazed crew with a set of custom carving knives, which they kept in their car trunks in case a quick assignment arose.
03:00:03.000The special NYPD-FBI task force cracked the DeMeo gang.
03:00:07.000It tagged the criminals for 75 murders.
03:00:10.000DeMeo, who was rubbed out by fellow mobsters as the cops closed in, bragged of 100 personally, making him far more destructive than any known U.S. serial killer.
03:00:43.000Yeah, I was on Mulberry Street between Prince and Spring, and the Ravenite Social Club, which was Gotti's headquarters, was downstairs in one apartment over from me.
03:00:52.000And they used to go Wednesday night was the night when they all met.
03:00:56.000And so all these limos would start pulling up along the street.
03:01:00.000They would double park all the way down Mulberry Street and they would go inside.
03:01:04.000And the way – originally they got a wiretap inside the club at some point.
03:01:10.000I don't know how they got it in but that's how they took down Gotti.
03:01:13.000But then – so then Gotti found out about the wiretaps.
03:02:17.000And I would pay them, the first of the month I'd go over to their condo, and they would make espressos, and they had cannolis, and we'd sit down, you always had to sit down with them.
03:04:13.000No, it's all super expensive boutique-y shops, you know, the kind of places where you walk in and they sell like six pairs of jeans and three belts for like $1,000 each and great little restaurants that have like five tables in them.
03:04:31.000They still have those kind of places there?
03:04:45.000People want to see Gregory on the road.
03:04:47.000I'm going to be coming to you New Orleans next weekend and Lafayette, Louisiana, and then I will be in Chicago at the Den Theater October 15th.