The Joe Rogan Experience - September 10, 2012


Joe Rogan Experience #263 - Kat Von D, Eddie Bravo


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 19 minutes

Words per Minute

212.50027

Word Count

29,704

Sentence Count

3,013

Misogynist Sentences

112


Summary

In this episode of the official Joe Rogan Experience podcast, the boys discuss the end of Fleshlight's sponsorship of the show, the recent hack at Onnit, and the new deal they're offering with Alienware. They also talk about the new Alienware laptop from Alienware and some other cool stuff. Also, the guys talk about a bunch of other stuff that's not related to the podcast, but you probably should have heard about it anyway. Just pay the 2.95 postage and you're good to go. Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Thanks to Pale Fire and Mossberg Records for the use of their music stylings. This episode was produced and edited by Riley Bray. The opinions stated here are our own, not those of our companies, unless otherwise stated. We do not own the rights to any music used in this episode. All credit given to artists and labels. If you like what you hear, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts, Podchaser.fm/JoeRoganPODCAST and we'll get a shoutout on the next episode of The Official Rogan Podcast. Thank you for listening and supporting the show. Joe Rogans Podcast, you're awesome. XOXO, Buckle Up! - The Crew at Rogan & Rogan podcast. - Don't Don't Talk About It Podcast, Don't Tell Mom podcast, The Crew, Brian Rogan, The Crews, Brian Rogans, and The Real Catz Podcast, - It's a Podcast, the Crew, the Real Catchick Podcast, and Don't Play the Drugs Podcast, The Dope Podcast, by Brian Don't Do It, the Crew at Workaholic, and the Crew is a Podcast by The Rogan Pod, we'll Talk About it's All About It! - We'll Talk It Up Podcast, Featuring: Brian and The Crew (featuring: , , The Crew & The Crew and , and & , the Crews Podcast . Thank You Don't Be That's Podcasts Podcast, Brian D's, The Real Don't Get It Up, & the Crew's Music, And "The Real Cat Talk Podcast, We'll Be That Bad Podcast


Transcript

00:00:02.000 I think we sold so many Fleshlights that it was impossible for them to sell more because everyone who listens to this show is a pervert.
00:00:10.000 No way.
00:00:10.000 They had tapped the market.
00:00:12.000 So what?
00:00:13.000 I mean, you can only advertise with someone for so long.
00:00:15.000 I mean, everybody who listens to this show has heard about the Fleshlight by now.
00:00:18.000 It makes sense that they wouldn't be a sponsor anymore.
00:00:20.000 So they decided to sever the relationship?
00:00:22.000 Yeah.
00:00:23.000 Fleshlight backed out?
00:00:24.000 Yeah.
00:00:24.000 Well, it's not that they backed out.
00:00:26.000 It's just we ended it.
00:00:27.000 We did it for a long time.
00:00:29.000 This is totally amicable.
00:00:31.000 They're very nice guys.
00:00:32.000 Everybody knows where Coca-Cola is, but you keep advertising.
00:00:34.000 Yeah, I'm not running any companies, man.
00:00:37.000 I don't give a fuck.
00:00:37.000 I tweet them still.
00:00:39.000 I still talk to them.
00:00:40.000 There's a good video that they just posted that's crazy.
00:00:43.000 They just couldn't keep up with it.
00:00:44.000 The first product ever where they stopped advertising because they couldn't keep up with the demand.
00:00:50.000 I don't know if that's true.
00:00:51.000 I'm just joking around about that.
00:00:53.000 And you know what you would think?
00:00:54.000 It makes sense.
00:00:55.000 The only product ever is a fake vagina.
00:00:59.000 That's the only one that they'd run out of materials.
00:01:03.000 I don't understand what you're saying.
00:01:04.000 That skin is rare.
00:01:06.000 You know how they make that skin?
00:01:07.000 Yeah, it's actually a food-based product.
00:01:12.000 I'm chewing on one right now.
00:01:13.000 You're chewing on one?
00:01:14.000 It's not really like a plastic.
00:01:17.000 You could almost digest it with your body.
00:01:20.000 It's really weird.
00:01:21.000 You gotta check out the...
00:01:23.000 They just posted a video.
00:01:24.000 She's all, what the fuck did I walk into?
00:01:26.000 Yeah, what did we walk into?
00:01:27.000 This isn't even our real sponsor.
00:01:29.000 We're actually sponsored by Onnit.com, makers of Alpha Brain, Shroom Tech, Shroom Tech Sport, Shroom Tech Immune.
00:01:35.000 And also, we recently got hacked, ladies and gentlemen.
00:01:38.000 Yeah, we got hacked.
00:01:40.000 They got a hold of some encrypted data.
00:01:44.000 It's all explained at Onnit.com forward slash breach.
00:01:49.000 And because of that, they're offering...
00:01:51.000 An 18% discount off of everything for the next couple of days.
00:01:55.000 So you just use the code name GotYourBack.
00:01:58.000 People are very bummed out over there that someone hacked into the system.
00:02:03.000 But that's just the way it goes, man.
00:02:05.000 If you're online, someone can get you.
00:02:08.000 Those little script kiddies, those bad motherfuckers.
00:02:11.000 Apparently, it wasn't the best setup at Onnit.
00:02:13.000 They've radically improved it because of that, and they feel terrible about it.
00:02:16.000 They just didn't know.
00:02:17.000 It's a fairly new company.
00:02:19.000 I've been hacked three times at just a gas station this year.
00:02:22.000 I mean, I've had to change all my shit because of gas stations.
00:02:26.000 Gas stations all the time.
00:02:28.000 Something happens when you run your car through that thing.
00:02:31.000 The one you just stick in?
00:02:33.000 Yeah, when you slide it through.
00:02:34.000 When you run your car through and then you put in your zip code, apparently some of them are rigged.
00:02:40.000 And some of them just copy your information.
00:02:43.000 And then they have to figure out which gas station it was, where were you when it happened, which machine did you use?
00:02:48.000 And then they find out and go in the machine and find out who rigged it.
00:02:51.000 Like some employee or something rigged it.
00:02:53.000 Yeah, it could be that.
00:02:54.000 It could be a third party that transmits that data.
00:02:58.000 It's really pretty sophisticated stuff.
00:02:59.000 It's really nuts, really.
00:03:01.000 But there's a lot of money in organized crime, and stealing credit cards is a big part of it.
00:03:05.000 And so it's just fucking super common.
00:03:07.000 If you're online, people are going to go after you.
00:03:10.000 That discount also works on kettlebells and battle ropes.
00:03:14.000 So all shit to become manly.
00:03:16.000 Go get some.
00:03:16.000 Alright, and thanks to Alienware MMA for hooking us up with some dope laptops.
00:03:20.000 And go to deathsquad.tv and pick yourself up some cat shirts.
00:03:25.000 Yeah, that's the kind of shirts that I like.
00:03:27.000 Are you gonna keep selling the first one?
00:03:30.000 No, but I do have, like, a box of the old ones left over that I might eventually put on sale.
00:03:36.000 There's only, like, a hundred of them left.
00:03:38.000 The old one is dope.
00:03:39.000 I like the new one, but the old one, I would love it if you had that for sale as well, because I just think it's the shit.
00:03:45.000 That cat, though, is awesome.
00:03:47.000 That cat is the future.
00:03:49.000 All right, you dirty bitches.
00:03:50.000 Cat Von D is here.
00:03:52.000 Buckle the fuck up, the real cat.
00:03:55.000 Play the music, Brian, so it can be official.
00:03:58.000 You don't talk about mushrooms.
00:03:59.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.
00:04:01.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day.
00:04:05.000 There's a lot of shit over at honor.com, Eddie Bravo Audio.
00:04:09.000 I don't have to talk about all the products.
00:04:11.000 Okay, so sometimes you go, I'm not going to get rid of it.
00:04:13.000 Yeah, sometimes I just half-ass it.
00:04:15.000 Because for a while there, dude, I was very impressed with your enthusiasm and your passion during those commercials.
00:04:21.000 My enthusiasm and the passion is still there.
00:04:23.000 Every time.
00:04:24.000 Well, it's just based on reality.
00:04:26.000 People ask me all the time, dude, is that shit for real?
00:04:29.000 People ask me that all the time.
00:04:30.000 I'm like, dude, Joe would not be involved in some shit that didn't work.
00:04:35.000 He's only involved in shit that works.
00:04:37.000 Trust me.
00:04:38.000 I take it every day.
00:04:38.000 You don't have to get mine.
00:04:40.000 If you're interested in nootropics, there's a lot of stuff that you can get on your own and just buy it in bulk and it's way cheaper than doing this like what we've done.
00:04:48.000 But just go Google it.
00:04:49.000 It's fascinating shit.
00:04:51.000 It's vitamins for your brain.
00:04:52.000 It works.
00:04:52.000 You don't need that, you clever woman.
00:04:55.000 No.
00:04:55.000 You're on top of shit already.
00:04:57.000 Imagine her tattoos on it, on Shroom Tuck.
00:05:01.000 My friend Eddie Bravo is here with Kat Von D because Kat Von D actually wrote on Eddie Bravo's chest.
00:05:06.000 Yep.
00:05:07.000 Well, I tattooed on it.
00:05:09.000 Pull it up.
00:05:10.000 I haven't shaved my chest in a long time, so it's kind of a Paul Stanley-ish.
00:05:14.000 Paul Stanley-ish.
00:05:16.000 That's my grandmother.
00:05:17.000 Wow.
00:05:18.000 I love that tattoo.
00:05:19.000 How long ago did we do that?
00:05:21.000 That was three years ago.
00:05:24.000 Yeah.
00:05:24.000 Something like that.
00:05:25.000 That is what I think is the most impressive style of artwork, that reproduction of portraits.
00:05:32.000 It freaks me out.
00:05:34.000 In a good way?
00:05:35.000 I saw this girl last night that had her father on her arm as a child, though, and it was just this little child on her arm, and I'm like, has anyone ever tried to, like, is it messy?
00:05:45.000 Is it weird when people are like, you know, like I try to make him blink?
00:05:49.000 You know, like as a baby and like fuck her with the face and it's like, is that weird to you?
00:05:52.000 She goes, no, this guy's cummed on it before and I made him lick it off and I'm like, what?
00:05:56.000 Like, that's just crazy.
00:05:58.000 Like, those realistic tattoos.
00:06:00.000 Whoa.
00:06:02.000 Okay, Brian.
00:06:04.000 I don't know what the hell he just said.
00:06:06.000 I think Brian needs to go to it.
00:06:07.000 Seriously.
00:06:07.000 You need to go take some medicine.
00:06:08.000 I think, for a second, then I'm like, damn, I smoked too much weed.
00:06:10.000 I smoked too much weed.
00:06:11.000 No, I think Brian did.
00:06:13.000 You just went too deep, right?
00:06:14.000 You just ran up a ramp covered in Vaseline, son.
00:06:18.000 I definitely smoked too much weed on that.
00:06:20.000 You lost me.
00:06:21.000 Yeah.
00:06:22.000 I have to deal with him by myself sometimes.
00:06:24.000 I was trying to remember the story.
00:06:25.000 And he acts like I'm crazy.
00:06:26.000 I was trying to remember the story that happened last night, but then I was too stoned to remember it, so then I was trying to stumble while telling a story.
00:06:31.000 You just gotta slow down, son.
00:06:33.000 It's gonna be okay.
00:06:34.000 The crazy thing about how this tattoo came about Her shop was one block away from Old Legends.
00:06:41.000 Remember that?
00:06:42.000 Wait, what's Old Legends?
00:06:43.000 Legends is an MMA gym that was in Hollywood.
00:06:47.000 It was a kickboxing gym just right down the street from your shop.
00:06:51.000 So I would pass by to go home.
00:06:53.000 I lived in New West Hollywood.
00:06:55.000 I would pass by to and from work all the time and always see your tech.
00:06:59.000 I never saw your show, but I knew who you were from the billboards around Hollywood and shit.
00:07:03.000 But I never, ever, not once thought about ever getting a tattoo for me.
00:07:08.000 I just didn't think about it.
00:07:09.000 And then what happened?
00:07:10.000 My guy, Carson Hill, you know, I have this tattoo artist who's awesome.
00:07:13.000 His name is Carson Hill.
00:07:14.000 He's in LA. Fucking amazing.
00:07:15.000 But I'm cool with him.
00:07:17.000 I'm only gonna let him fuck with my shit now.
00:07:19.000 That's what I was thinking.
00:07:20.000 But then, after like a year of just passing by your shop, I ended up at the UFC in Dallas.
00:07:28.000 We were in Dallas, and there wasn't shit to do.
00:07:30.000 And I used to work for the UFC. And I'm sitting there in my hotel room and the ALMA show comes up, that ALMA Awards.
00:07:35.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:07:36.000 I was there.
00:07:37.000 It was my mom.
00:07:38.000 I took my mom.
00:07:38.000 Yeah, so I'm watching the ALMA Awards, the Latino Celebrity Awards or whatever.
00:07:43.000 And I'm watching that, you know, being Latin.
00:07:45.000 And I'm like, oh shit, I didn't know that white dude was fucking half Mexican.
00:07:49.000 Like actors are coming up and rock stars.
00:07:50.000 I thought you were talking about me.
00:07:51.000 No, no, no, no.
00:07:53.000 And then Kat Von D comes up, and I'm like, oh shit!
00:07:57.000 She's Mexican?
00:07:58.000 Holy shit, I didn't know that.
00:07:59.000 Well, I was born in Mexico, but my family's from Argentina, so I'm Latina, but I'm all mixed up.
00:08:03.000 Damn, your family's from Argentina?
00:08:05.000 Yeah.
00:08:06.000 Wow, that's cool.
00:08:07.000 So at that point, let me finish this real quick.
00:08:11.000 At that point, now she's in my head.
00:08:12.000 I'm like, oh, she's Mexican.
00:08:14.000 So that was Friday afternoon, Monday, first class.
00:08:18.000 After class, it's 11 o'clock at night.
00:08:21.000 I'm driving past her shop.
00:08:23.000 It's closed up.
00:08:24.000 And I'm thinking, a wild hair, just a delusional thought.
00:08:28.000 Hey, maybe I could get her to do a tattoo on me and film it and put it on my show.
00:08:33.000 Me thinking like she would actually do it.
00:08:36.000 I'm thinking for 10 seconds, I'm thinking...
00:08:39.000 That's a good idea.
00:08:40.000 But then as I made a ride on Santa Monica Boulevard, I'm like, She's so famous, she would never do that!
00:08:45.000 I'm like, what a crazy dumb thought.
00:08:47.000 I go home, take a shower, to get a late night bite to eat at Kitchen 24, by myself.
00:08:53.000 I just walked in.
00:08:54.000 I sat there, and this girl comes up to me that I knew from a long time ago, Jason's ex-girlfriend, Jason Chambers' ex-girlfriend, comes up and goes, Eddie, what's up?
00:09:03.000 And she gives me a hug and goes, oh shit, and she looks at me and goes, you should let Kat Von D tattoo you!
00:09:09.000 I'm like, that is crazy, because I was just thinking that an hour and a half ago.
00:09:14.000 That's insane, or whatever.
00:09:15.000 I'm like, that's a pretty crazy synchronicity.
00:09:17.000 And then she goes, no, but I'm serious.
00:09:19.000 I could actually get you on the show.
00:09:21.000 I'm like, what?
00:09:22.000 She goes, yeah, I work on the show.
00:09:23.000 They hired me.
00:09:24.000 This shit ain't real.
00:09:25.000 She was such an idiot, that chick.
00:09:28.000 It's just interesting that you came in riding on that vehicle because it really honestly would have probably worked more against you than for you, but somehow you made it through.
00:09:37.000 She was bros with the casting director and she goes, the casting director loves UFC. She wasn't bros with anyone.
00:09:43.000 Well, she did get me on the show.
00:09:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:09:46.000 And for that, I am grateful for her.
00:09:47.000 Oh, well, thank you.
00:09:49.000 It's funny when shit works that way.
00:09:51.000 When you have some weird idea and all of a sudden it becomes reality.
00:09:54.000 The next morning, I meet the casting director and he said, let's do it, because he's a big UFC fan.
00:09:59.000 And I was just right there on the show.
00:10:01.000 And you know what?
00:10:02.000 Originally, they go, Kat is very picky on who she does tattoos with.
00:10:06.000 So if she doesn't pick you, will you go with the other two?
00:10:09.000 And I said, no.
00:10:10.000 Were you on the fence at all?
00:10:12.000 Well, you know, when we would film the show, there was like a screening process.
00:10:17.000 So I would get these lists of different ideas and requests, I guess.
00:10:22.000 And so I would, based on the artwork, I would filter through and do the ones that I knew that I was capable of or I'd be excited about.
00:10:29.000 But they wouldn't really tell me much about the person coming in because they wanted it to be all natural on camera and stuff.
00:10:34.000 So I didn't know...
00:10:35.000 I think I knew very minimal.
00:10:37.000 Other than your name, I didn't know.
00:10:38.000 Yeah, she didn't know.
00:10:39.000 She didn't know.
00:10:41.000 Very strange.
00:10:42.000 Yeah, I said I wouldn't do it.
00:10:43.000 I felt it was so crazy that I thought of it that night.
00:10:45.000 An hour and a half later, some chick makes it happen.
00:10:48.000 I thought it was so crazy that I said, no, I won't do it unless Kat does it.
00:10:52.000 I'm not interested.
00:10:52.000 Yeah, that is really odd when things like that happen.
00:10:55.000 Because there's no denying that statistically, put that shit on paper.
00:10:59.000 How crazy is that?
00:11:00.000 That's a real story.
00:11:01.000 Put the thought into your head on paper and then meeting.
00:11:03.000 What are the odds of that?
00:11:05.000 That's like fucking millions to one.
00:11:06.000 It's almost like the story of your life is like the writers are working on it less and it's just getting shittier and easier for things to happen.
00:11:16.000 It's like, instead of it being some complicated fucking war and peace epic of complicated I do twining personalities.
00:11:24.000 No, I just think about some shit and the next day you get a phone call.
00:11:27.000 It's like, what?
00:11:27.000 No, an hour and a half later.
00:11:29.000 Imagine if you had a bunch of magic gifts and you didn't know about them and you were just using them on tattoos and shit when you could maybe fly or breathe underwater or something.
00:11:41.000 You might have had a magic gift and you made it happen.
00:11:45.000 Maybe you get a handful of those in your life and you just decided to do that and make it happen.
00:11:51.000 Yeah, it's crazy.
00:11:52.000 Actually, when you think about it, even if you had like little magic, like the ability to make something happen, a few gifts like that in your life, you're really not going to be able to do anything that's truly supernatural.
00:12:03.000 I mean, that would have already been done already.
00:12:05.000 So like when you look at someone who's got like a tattoo is actually one of the best things you can do.
00:12:10.000 Get something that's permanent artwork on your skin that to you, I know, means an incredible amount.
00:12:15.000 And to get it from someone like her, and to get it all in one big...
00:12:18.000 That really is better than most magic tricks.
00:12:22.000 It's insane, right?
00:12:23.000 It's fucking incredible.
00:12:24.000 I was trying to tell the story to the producers.
00:12:25.000 They didn't want to hear that, because they didn't want to hear that one of the chicks that worked on the show pulled string.
00:12:31.000 They didn't want to make that part of the show.
00:12:33.000 Yeah, because it breaks the walls of reality.
00:12:36.000 When I was telling that story, I'm like, I got an incredible story, but they go, we don't want to hear that story.
00:12:40.000 Oh, that's a great story.
00:12:41.000 Why wouldn't they tell that story?
00:12:42.000 Because then it shows that someone got dragged in and pulled...
00:12:46.000 But, you know, I think, too, I think it's smarter on the, I mean, you know, the relatability on that in comparison to your actual story, you know, like what you do and what it took to get you there and the meaning behind the tattoos, a lot more, I guess, you know, it resonates with the viewer much more than saying, oh, yeah, hey, this is a Hollywood moment.
00:13:04.000 I was at fucking, you know, a cafe.
00:13:07.000 Right.
00:13:07.000 Well, I wouldn't think of it as a Hollywood moment, though.
00:13:09.000 I think for him, it's just a crazy piece of synchronicity.
00:13:13.000 Yeah, and I think we ended up actually talking about that kind of stuff anyway, like, throughout the session.
00:13:17.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:13:18.000 I may have told you that story before.
00:13:20.000 Are you a big fan of synchronicity?
00:13:22.000 Do you experience it in your life?
00:13:24.000 Yeah, I'm a big fan of being the master of your own reality, I think.
00:13:29.000 You know, it's not so much about wishing your way through something or manifesting it, but, you know, I think certain mental attitudes or mentalities that are more productive than others.
00:13:38.000 Well, we know that certain attitudes, I mean, you've talked about it, like that John Sarno back thing, like if you have like some sort of a, like, you could be upset or angry at things.
00:13:48.000 And have a bad back and think that your bad back is actually like an injury.
00:13:53.000 It's not even an injury.
00:13:54.000 It literally is your own brain causing your body to knot up in some sort of a crazy way that's painful.
00:14:00.000 It deprives...
00:14:01.000 I don't know the exact science behind it, but when you have some serious stress in your life, somehow...
00:14:07.000 This is a theory that I heard.
00:14:09.000 I didn't make this up.
00:14:10.000 Your body...
00:14:11.000 The pain is real.
00:14:12.000 Your body will...
00:14:13.000 They suffocate or deprive oxygen to your back muscles, and then they get really sore and tight.
00:14:20.000 That's what happens when you get nervous or stressful.
00:14:23.000 That's the theory.
00:14:25.000 It kind of makes sense because I have a back story as well, but I don't want to get into that, but I believe it.
00:14:33.000 That's a long story.
00:14:34.000 We're here to talk about it.
00:14:35.000 Yeah, but my thinking was that, you know, you really do change a lot of shit with your mind.
00:14:41.000 I mean, your mind, just in the things that you come up with, like your artwork, doesn't ever feel like sometimes, like, where the fuck is this coming from?
00:14:50.000 This is almost like, it's coming out of nowhere.
00:14:52.000 It's coming out of your creativity.
00:14:55.000 It's coming out of this weird place in your mind, and then all of a sudden it's manifesting itself in this beauty.
00:14:59.000 Does it ever, like, freak you out?
00:15:02.000 I don't know if it freaks me out.
00:15:03.000 I just get excited about things.
00:15:05.000 I don't know.
00:15:06.000 I'm in love with my job.
00:15:08.000 I can't even call it my job.
00:15:09.000 That would be so weird to say that.
00:15:11.000 I guess I'm the luckiest person on the planet.
00:15:13.000 I think it's just more perspective, really.
00:15:17.000 I've been tattooed since I was 14 years old.
00:15:19.000 I got into my first tattoo shop when I was 16. Illegally, obviously.
00:15:24.000 And I never went through a traditional apprenticeship or anything like that.
00:15:26.000 But then this funny idea for a TV show happened when I was like 21, 22. And it changed the dynamics of things.
00:15:34.000 At the time I was drinking and partying a lot, so I'm sober now.
00:15:39.000 I almost had resentment towards people after doing a lot of the same stuff over and over again and the expectations that come in, it kind of rapes the art at times.
00:15:49.000 For me, I just wanted to create.
00:15:52.000 I just wanted to draw or tattoo and do my best.
00:15:55.000 And then the story behind the tattoo and all that, it gets pretty heavy after a while.
00:15:59.000 But then something flipped and I saw each opportunity Each tattoo has an opportunity to connect with people.
00:16:07.000 I think I'm always looking for that.
00:16:10.000 I sound like a hippie, but I like making people feel good about things and about life, whether it's about death or whatever.
00:16:18.000 It does sound like a hippie, but it's beautiful.
00:16:22.000 It's a weird thing that we mock stuff like that.
00:16:25.000 I don't.
00:16:26.000 I mock myself more than anything because I catch myself sounding that way.
00:16:29.000 I do as well.
00:16:30.000 Yeah, I catch myself sounding like a retard.
00:16:32.000 I'm like, what are you talking about, idealistic fool?
00:16:35.000 Synchronicity and shit.
00:16:35.000 But that would be the best way to live if we all could figure out how to tune in like that and everybody could.
00:16:40.000 I feel like I'm always at my most creative when I'm being...
00:16:42.000 Like, generous and kind and nice to as many people as possible.
00:16:46.000 Yeah.
00:16:46.000 Experience the, you know, a good connectivity with all the human beings you interact with.
00:16:52.000 Totally.
00:16:52.000 You feel better.
00:16:53.000 You feel like it's working better.
00:16:55.000 Yeah.
00:16:55.000 Well, I think you recognize your power as an individual, you know, and I think, like, intentions are really important.
00:17:01.000 You know, there's, like, this little thing that I do, and I think I've only told, like, one person about it at the end of every tattoo.
00:17:08.000 I put this paper towel on the tattoo, and I... I put like witch hazel, which is like a natural astringent and stuff.
00:17:15.000 And it's like I always like hold my hands over it for a minute.
00:17:18.000 And I think that the client most of the time thinks I'm just like cleaning it off or something.
00:17:22.000 But in my mind, I'm thinking like several words.
00:17:25.000 And this is really going to sound like a crazy, I don't know, like voodoo hippie thing.
00:17:31.000 But I just think these three words and it's like a transfer of energy and whatever.
00:17:36.000 What are the three words?
00:17:37.000 I'm telling you.
00:17:38.000 You can't tell me the three words?
00:17:39.000 Really?
00:17:40.000 What are they?
00:17:40.000 Secret?
00:17:41.000 Yeah.
00:17:41.000 Come on.
00:17:43.000 They're just words.
00:17:44.000 Why would you?
00:17:46.000 No, it's impossible to kill your magic.
00:17:47.000 It's impossible to kill your magic.
00:17:49.000 Unless it's something like rainbow chicken salad.
00:17:50.000 No, I want to hear that.
00:17:52.000 No, I want to hear it.
00:17:53.000 Why can't you tell us?
00:17:54.000 It's just words.
00:17:56.000 It's not just words.
00:17:57.000 I'm just kidding.
00:17:58.000 Well, I mean, I think you would help people.
00:18:00.000 You would fire them up.
00:18:01.000 Maybe they start doing that with their life.
00:18:04.000 Well, I mean, people have mantras and stuff and, you know, whatever works for you.
00:18:08.000 But they want to try the Cap Von D mantra.
00:18:10.000 It's been so successful.
00:18:12.000 Once it's on t-shirts, then forget it.
00:18:14.000 Maybe you have some magic.
00:18:15.000 You should, like, give it up.
00:18:16.000 I do have magic.
00:18:17.000 We all have magic.
00:18:17.000 But, no, the purpose being is that there's, like, intention behind everything you do.
00:18:23.000 And I think that's really important.
00:18:25.000 Because there is, like, a physical aspect of energy.
00:18:27.000 You know, when people are, like, vibes and all that stuff.
00:18:29.000 There's actual energy that you're putting out into the world.
00:18:31.000 So...
00:18:31.000 And focus.
00:18:32.000 I mean, we all know when someone's not focusing on us when you're having a conversation, when they're looking at their phone or doing something else.
00:18:37.000 Yeah, or you know, like when you meet people and they're just like, they're just dickheads or they're angry or they're having a bad day or it's hot or whatever.
00:18:44.000 And I've like witnessed it before where I can like bring...
00:18:51.000 I recognize my power to do that.
00:18:53.000 I remember one time I was driving down La Brea and the chick behind me wasn't paying attention and she totally crashed into my car.
00:19:00.000 And then the guy behind her wasn't paying attention and he crashed into her.
00:19:03.000 And his airbags went off and all this shit.
00:19:06.000 My car is pretty stealth.
00:19:08.000 I don't even think I got a ding on it.
00:19:10.000 The cars behind me were just tin cans.
00:19:13.000 I just remember getting out of the car now.
00:19:15.000 I'm wearing full leather and tattooed.
00:19:18.000 I'm like, that could be pretty intimidating.
00:19:20.000 I'm like, okay, I'm going to consciously make these people feel okay.
00:19:24.000 She rolled down her window and she's like...
00:19:26.000 I just remember going, hey, are you okay?
00:19:28.000 Just looking in her eye and asking if she's okay.
00:19:30.000 She just softened.
00:19:32.000 Don't kill me!
00:19:34.000 You look like some crazy gangbanger chick.
00:19:37.000 Yeah, you look like you could do some damage.
00:19:39.000 Yeah, if I was a chick, I would be so bummed out if I rear-ended you.
00:19:43.000 No, afterwards we were all laughing about it.
00:19:45.000 It would suck.
00:19:46.000 I think that we have the power to do that.
00:19:48.000 Most people get all up in arms about things, and I just realized...
00:19:51.000 I read something when I was a kid that nothing has any meaning other than the meaning that you give it.
00:19:55.000 Yeah, totally.
00:19:56.000 And you could force things to be positive.
00:19:58.000 You could force all negative situations to be opportunities for growth.
00:20:02.000 You know, you can.
00:20:03.000 You can.
00:20:03.000 It's a way.
00:20:04.000 You can live your life like that.
00:20:05.000 Totally.
00:20:06.000 Or you could be a fuckhead just slamming into walls everywhere.
00:20:08.000 And live in misery.
00:20:09.000 Never figure it out.
00:20:10.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:20:12.000 You got your first tattoo when you were 16?
00:20:14.000 No, I got my first tattoo when I was 14, actually.
00:20:16.000 Holy shit.
00:20:16.000 Was it good?
00:20:17.000 Yeah, I still have it.
00:20:18.000 It's like a little J on my ankle.
00:20:20.000 It was for my first love ever, and we dated for like three years.
00:20:24.000 Wow, that's intense.
00:20:25.000 Yeah, I ran away, moved across the country on a Greyhound bus.
00:20:30.000 How old were you when you did that?
00:20:31.000 By then I was 15 when I moved across, and then I was already tattooing and stuff.
00:20:36.000 Jesus Christ.
00:20:37.000 Yeah.
00:20:38.000 Wow.
00:20:39.000 Now you can put a Z under it and then put 99 problems in quotes.
00:20:42.000 I don't know that, but I just tell people it stands for Jesus.
00:20:45.000 Or just kidding.
00:20:47.000 Just kidding?
00:20:48.000 That's funny.
00:20:51.000 Yeah, you know.
00:20:52.000 Wow, that's a really young age to be traveling across the country.
00:20:56.000 I know, my poor parents, man.
00:20:57.000 And I had a hard time, I think, forgiving myself for a long time because I'm really close with my dad and stuff.
00:21:02.000 He actually lived with me up until recently and he got his own place and I was pretty bummed about that.
00:21:07.000 Yeah, at the time I was like, oh, you know, I never wanted to hurt anybody's feelings.
00:21:10.000 I just really felt like the need to do this thing that my family didn't understand, you know.
00:21:15.000 And they're from a different culture, like I said, and stuff, so they weren't really prepared for, you know, they assumed like, tattooing, oh my god, you're like a hoodlum or a gangster or a drug addict or a hooker or whatever, you know.
00:21:25.000 I was none of the above.
00:21:27.000 So they never put in their head, you're doing tattoos, boom, you're going to be some crazy famous chick.
00:21:34.000 We lived a really isolated world.
00:21:37.000 The way we were brought up was not very Americanized at all.
00:21:40.000 Which I'm glad because I feel like that's really honestly one of the things I credit to being able to do all the things I've done is just the discipline.
00:21:48.000 The three of us, my brother Sis and I, we were all classically trained on the piano since I was six.
00:21:54.000 Two hours a day we had to practice when we would rather be hanging out and stuff.
00:21:59.000 We were way too bored to afford video games and shit like that.
00:22:03.000 So I drew all the time and spent time with my family and stuff.
00:22:06.000 So for that, I'm grateful.
00:22:07.000 I feel like that discipline really plays into executing ideas.
00:22:11.000 I have millions of ideas at all times.
00:22:14.000 I think a lot of people have ideas and they've been programmed to think it's not attainable or something, which is silly to me.
00:22:21.000 Yeah, well there's that hump that you have to get over in associating pleasure with getting things done.
00:22:26.000 Yeah, and also I think, too, it's like people's idea of success is so warped, you know?
00:22:30.000 It's like they base it on money or status or fame.
00:22:33.000 And to be honest with you, when I started tattooing, I didn't even know it was a job.
00:22:37.000 I just knew it felt organic and it felt, like, natural.
00:22:41.000 It didn't come to me naturally.
00:22:42.000 I worked really hard for it, but it felt like this is where I was supposed to be, you know?
00:22:45.000 And this is granted before, like, a television show and stuff.
00:22:49.000 It was, you know...
00:22:49.000 I just came from Disneyland.
00:22:50.000 It was like...
00:22:51.000 If I would have gone to Disneyland back then, like, you know, you don't get...
00:22:55.000 Happy smiles and stuff.
00:22:56.000 I had so many Julia Roberts moments going into stores.
00:22:59.000 It's like, can we help you?
00:23:01.000 And I'm just like, I could buy this place.
00:23:04.000 So they just immediately judge you?
00:23:07.000 That's a common thing?
00:23:08.000 I think when I was younger, yeah.
00:23:09.000 Nowadays, it's so embraced.
00:23:12.000 My dad, who is super anti-tattoos and doesn't have any or anything, it took 10 years of me tattooing because I started tattooing on that TV show after 10 years of tattooing.
00:23:23.000 It took a television show for my dad to actually, you know, acknowledge the fact that I wasn't, like, not a loser, but, you know, like, that I wasn't throwing my life away.
00:23:33.000 He's like, oh, and sometimes it takes that.
00:23:35.000 I don't hold that against my dad.
00:23:36.000 I mean, I don't blame him, really, you know.
00:23:37.000 You've influenced a lot of chicks in, like, how they look.
00:23:42.000 Like, you were the first one that, like, popped through.
00:23:46.000 Yeah.
00:23:46.000 And boys, Joe.
00:23:47.000 The first one who was like a really hot chick who just tattooed herself the fuck up.
00:23:53.000 It's like, whoa, this chick went for it.
00:23:54.000 And guys were like, I like it.
00:23:57.000 I like it.
00:23:58.000 And then boom.
00:23:59.000 Then there was a wave of them.
00:24:00.000 It was you.
00:24:01.000 And then it was like everywhere you look, there's these crazy tattooed up girls.
00:24:05.000 Like the percentage of it...
00:24:07.000 I don't know what...
00:24:08.000 I'll put a number on it.
00:24:09.000 Increased by like 30, 40, 50 percent?
00:24:12.000 It went from however minimal amount of women tattooed to like one out of three women have tattoos in America.
00:24:19.000 And that was like back...
00:24:21.000 I remember that stat when I did the Ellen DeGeneres show, which was like years ago.
00:24:24.000 That's hilarious.
00:24:25.000 It's probably more now.
00:24:25.000 Do you look at the stats like we're winning, we're taking over?
00:24:28.000 No, no, no, because I never...
00:24:29.000 I actually, you know, I mean, I have friends that have no tattoos and they like feel the need to get one.
00:24:34.000 I'm like, I don't know, I like you the way you are, you know?
00:24:36.000 It's good.
00:24:37.000 I mean, I get tattooed for myself personally, you know?
00:24:40.000 If anything, it's kind of...
00:24:42.000 It's kind of a drag sometimes.
00:24:43.000 I don't really feel like always talking about my tattoos when I'm going out and stuff, but it's also a positive thing.
00:24:49.000 I can't complain.
00:24:50.000 I love art.
00:24:52.000 Yeah, it's a weird thing with people.
00:24:54.000 If they either have them or they don't have them.
00:24:57.000 If they don't have them, they could never imagine.
00:25:00.000 I can never imagine drawing something.
00:25:01.000 It just stays on you forever.
00:25:02.000 Suicide girls, they owe you big time.
00:25:04.000 You blew that company up, right?
00:25:07.000 I don't know.
00:25:07.000 Well, that whole look.
00:25:08.000 Yeah, they need to worship you.
00:25:11.000 I think I tattooed the guy who came up with that whole concept a while ago.
00:25:16.000 Do you feel weird about that?
00:25:18.000 I mean, that's got to be a strange thing to have so much influence.
00:25:23.000 I may not have recognized it when I first started being in the public eye or whatever.
00:25:30.000 Until I got sober, I think I really started recognizing that and it became important to me.
00:25:37.000 I'm pretty PG-13 just by nature.
00:25:40.000 I'm pretty squeaky clean.
00:25:41.000 You could take my phone and go through it and find pictures of my cat and stuff.
00:25:46.000 Probably not anything incriminating.
00:25:50.000 I like the idea of like putting that good stuff out there, you know, like all my books and everything.
00:25:57.000 It's really easy for me to talk about my downfalls or like my issues or not struggles because that sounds like I'm a martyr or something.
00:26:03.000 But like, you know, the shit I've experienced in hopes that, I don't know, people would feel less alone because I know what it's like to feel that way.
00:26:11.000 So, you know, I don't know.
00:26:13.000 That's what a lot of people say about people that are covered in tattoos.
00:26:16.000 I have two sleeves, in case you're thinking I'm being an asshole.
00:26:21.000 A lot of people who don't have tattoos feel like you're covering something up.
00:26:26.000 Oh, yeah.
00:26:26.000 I remember Dr. Drew and I had a conversation about that, because I loved this book that he wrote, and in it talked about how tattooing is like a form of narcissism, not on like a level of, oh, I think I'm awesome, but the opposite, which is narcissism just the same.
00:26:44.000 It's a reflection on the inside.
00:26:47.000 I don't really necessarily see it that way, because to me, yeah, there's some tattoos that hold meaning.
00:26:52.000 Like, I love my dad.
00:26:53.000 I got a portrait of my arm.
00:26:54.000 That's self-explanatory.
00:26:55.000 But there's other stuff, like my friends who don't know how to draw tattoo me, and it looks like a drunken three-year-old did something.
00:27:01.000 And I love it, because it's just fun, and it's cool, and I don't really care, you know?
00:27:05.000 You let your friends draw on you?
00:27:06.000 That's awesome.
00:27:07.000 I let them tattoo me, which is a bigger deal.
00:27:11.000 Dr. Drew is a silly bitch.
00:27:13.000 He really is a silly bitch.
00:27:14.000 I love him too, but he's a silly bitch.
00:27:16.000 We need to get him on the podcast.
00:27:18.000 I saw him the other day at the gas station.
00:27:19.000 I would get him on.
00:27:20.000 I would get him on.
00:27:20.000 You know, he's been involved in that scandal for influencing the idea that people bought some certain drugs off-label, like saying, touting their sexual benefits and stuff.
00:27:33.000 And then he'll talk crap about marijuana or people who smoke pot, and he'll say silly things like how horribly addictive it is.
00:27:40.000 It's all just nonsense.
00:27:42.000 Like I said earlier, I haven't owned a television in 16 years in March, and I'm pretty adamant about not watching television.
00:27:50.000 So I don't know.
00:27:51.000 But I get what you're saying.
00:27:53.000 He can't tell you why you're getting it.
00:27:55.000 You can't say that you're just not enjoying the art.
00:27:57.000 You can't.
00:27:58.000 I know people love their tattoos.
00:27:59.000 They love it for art.
00:28:00.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:28:01.000 You don't have to be covering something.
00:28:02.000 Well, I'm an expressive person and, you know, yeah, like, of course we all have issues and stuff.
00:28:05.000 I have no problem, like, wearing my heart on my sleeve.
00:28:08.000 I mean, I've actually gotten a lot of shit for that, you know what I mean, in the past and stuff with relationships.
00:28:13.000 And I just don't really live in that world of regret or really giving a fuck.
00:28:16.000 Yeah.
00:28:17.000 I just hate absolutes like that.
00:28:19.000 Like, you have to be fucked up.
00:28:21.000 You have to be this.
00:28:22.000 You have to be that.
00:28:23.000 It gets silly with certain things.
00:28:25.000 Yeah, I mean, I think no one's perfect either, so I feel like, you know, I can see the goodness in everything, even the stuff I don't necessarily agree with, you know?
00:28:33.000 I try to, at least.
00:28:35.000 Right.
00:28:36.000 Yeah, I just, I would like to look at things that way.
00:28:40.000 I would like to look at people with tattoos and just, you know, I don't know why anybody got them, but I look at them and go, wow, I hope you like it.
00:28:46.000 I hope it's something that means something.
00:28:47.000 Yeah.
00:28:47.000 I hope it's something...
00:28:48.000 Everybody, for whatever reason, wants to immediately try to figure out what was fucked up with you that made you get to the place where you enjoy that.
00:28:58.000 I'm more scared of the person who's totally corporate and working in a cubicle that's miserable and there's suppression of creativity.
00:29:05.000 Like, man, that's such a waste of...
00:29:07.000 Life.
00:29:08.000 Like, God, imagine if everybody was free to do things like, um, as they, you know, like, like I was talking about earlier, people's idea of success.
00:29:15.000 It's like, imagine if you didn't, you weren't bound by, like, everybody else's idea of that, you know?
00:29:21.000 Like, if you could settle for a job that paid less, but you were completely happy.
00:29:25.000 I mean, my dad and I, we used to argue about this all the time because he's like, you know, you didn't go to high school.
00:29:29.000 And then it's like, yeah, I know, dad, I know.
00:29:31.000 But check it out.
00:29:32.000 Like, you went to years of school and you...
00:29:34.000 Don't like what you do and you're struggling so hard and you know my dad comes from a medical background and stuff but um and I was so on my way to work every day and I walked down like the tarnished fucking Hollywood stars you know like just walking I'm like oh my god there's like a bunch of punk rockers there and it's like oh look it's just life is good like I love it you know and and if I wasn't getting paid I'd still be happy.
00:29:56.000 There's a documentary that Werner Herzog just put out.
00:29:59.000 It's called The Happy People, A Year in the Taiga.
00:30:03.000 It's these people that live up in Siberia and how happy they are.
00:30:07.000 And there's like no depression.
00:30:10.000 Everybody just does their work.
00:30:11.000 And their whole life is struggle.
00:30:14.000 Their whole life, they live off the land almost completely and entirely, trapping, hunting, and they're in fucking Siberia.
00:30:21.000 There's only one way to get there.
00:30:22.000 You have a couple months where you can take a boat.
00:30:23.000 That's it.
00:30:24.000 Otherwise, you've got to get flown in.
00:30:26.000 There's no roads to get up there, and these people are happy as fuck.
00:30:29.000 They're just up there, you know, like, shooting animals, living off the land, growing their own vegetables.
00:30:35.000 They have to work hard in the spring and summer to prepare for the winter.
00:30:39.000 Yeah.
00:30:39.000 And then they prepare for the winter, like, smoking fish.
00:30:41.000 I mean, every day.
00:30:42.000 No one has a job.
00:30:44.000 Every day, they're working, like, securing food for their families and storing it up so they can make it through the next winter.
00:30:50.000 I mean, it's amazing.
00:30:52.000 But it's not really that different than living in Hollywood and people who do that in their own ways.
00:30:56.000 It's just more, I feel like...
00:30:58.000 It's more natural.
00:30:59.000 Yeah, it sounds so much more simple and, like, less thought...
00:31:02.000 Like here, it's like the stress of getting to work and fighting three hours of traffic to get to a job that I don't respect or love.
00:31:10.000 You're still suffering or whatever for something.
00:31:14.000 Well, something happened somewhere along the way and society and our culture moved way faster than the human body did.
00:31:22.000 And all of a sudden, jobs required you to sit still.
00:31:26.000 They required you to stare at fucking unnatural light.
00:31:29.000 They required you to enter in things and your fucking back hurts and you're doing it all day, every day.
00:31:34.000 Like, the body's not designed for that.
00:31:36.000 The body's designed to do what these fucking people in Siberia are doing.
00:31:38.000 It's designed to go out and kill caribou and, you know, have dogs chained to trees and they keep the bears away.
00:31:46.000 I mean, these guys are happy as fuck.
00:31:47.000 Yeah.
00:31:48.000 And this is the real way we're supposed to live.
00:31:50.000 It's crazy.
00:31:51.000 What if they hate it?
00:31:52.000 Well, they don't though.
00:31:53.000 See, what I'm saying is that all of our little receptors, I think, are set up to reward us for certain experiences.
00:32:01.000 I don't think we're set up any different than the people that lived when you had to live like that.
00:32:06.000 So I think the only way to really not feel lost...
00:32:10.000 There's no fucking movie star status when you're in Siberia.
00:32:14.000 There's no front of the line of the club.
00:32:16.000 There's no mentally generated...
00:32:17.000 There's no bullshit.
00:32:17.000 There's no nothing.
00:32:18.000 There's no head of Tenth Planet Jiu-Jitsu.
00:32:20.000 There's no stand-up comedian.
00:32:21.000 There's no nothing.
00:32:22.000 There's get a fish.
00:32:23.000 You gotta get a fish.
00:32:24.000 Because we're gonna fucking die in the winter if you don't.
00:32:27.000 And everybody does that, but yet they're all happy as shit.
00:32:30.000 There's...
00:32:31.000 Remember when you were a kid and you thought of where you were?
00:32:35.000 Like, well, I'll never live there.
00:32:37.000 I'm never going to move there.
00:32:38.000 I'm never going to get out of this class.
00:32:39.000 I'm never going to get out of this situation.
00:32:41.000 This is where I'm at.
00:32:42.000 Well, for them, it's a reality where they're surrounded by nature and woods.
00:32:48.000 Like, there really is no alternatives.
00:32:49.000 So they have no delusions.
00:32:51.000 There's no ridiculousness in their life.
00:32:53.000 And they're truly, in the moment, living like people were living 10,000-plus years ago.
00:32:58.000 Yeah.
00:32:59.000 That's how we're supposed to live.
00:33:00.000 So we're fucking ourselves up.
00:33:01.000 City bullshit.
00:33:02.000 How long do you think it would take?
00:33:03.000 One generation?
00:33:04.000 TV? They'd be out of there in a minute.
00:33:06.000 The kids were like, what are we doing out here?
00:33:08.000 Yeah.
00:33:09.000 Looking at MTV. Kat Von D would change the way they all look.
00:33:11.000 They would get scared.
00:33:12.000 I want a tattoo, mommy.
00:33:13.000 In one month, they'd all want tattoos.
00:33:14.000 They'd be making homemade tattoos of beaver teeth and shit.
00:33:19.000 They would start tattooing themselves in Siberia.
00:33:23.000 Yeah, we were at the coffee place, and we were having small talk with the nice lady behind the counter.
00:33:30.000 And she said, oh, I had a house sit this weekend.
00:33:33.000 It was terrible.
00:33:33.000 They didn't even have cable, no internet.
00:33:36.000 And me and Eddie were like, well, but we were being serious.
00:33:38.000 We're like, whoa, no cable?
00:33:41.000 What the fuck?
00:33:42.000 So what do you use, antenna?
00:33:43.000 That sucks.
00:33:44.000 And then Eddie goes, well, at least you got the internet.
00:33:47.000 And she's like, no, no, they didn't even have the internet.
00:33:49.000 He's like, what?
00:33:50.000 What?
00:33:51.000 Fuck TV. You can just get on the internet.
00:33:53.000 These guys don't even have that.
00:33:54.000 They don't even have electricity and they're happy.
00:33:56.000 They don't have electricity, man.
00:33:58.000 They just don't know.
00:33:59.000 They get a little bit of gasoline that they use for their snowmobiles and their chainsaws.
00:34:04.000 And that's a wrap.
00:34:05.000 That's it.
00:34:05.000 They probably think they're balling.
00:34:06.000 Like the lower class of them live in the hills and shit.
00:34:10.000 There's no class, man.
00:34:11.000 That's what's crazy.
00:34:11.000 They all live in the exact same houses.
00:34:13.000 They don't even use windows, man.
00:34:16.000 They don't use windows because windows are too hard to carry around.
00:34:19.000 So they build these houses out of logs and then they cut holes in the logs and put plastic and nail plastic in place.
00:34:25.000 That's all you need.
00:34:26.000 It's because of bears.
00:34:27.000 Bears rip them apart so often.
00:34:29.000 Those damn bears, I swear.
00:34:31.000 Where are they gonna get glass anyways?
00:34:33.000 It's hard to transport.
00:34:35.000 Oh, they could bring shit?
00:34:37.000 They could have chainsaws.
00:34:38.000 They're not making their own chainsaws.
00:34:40.000 They somehow or another got chainsaws either taken to them on a boat or flown in.
00:34:44.000 Somebody gave them a few tools.
00:34:46.000 But they make boats with a fucking big piece of wood.
00:34:51.000 They just drop it down and hollow it out and make this canoe.
00:34:54.000 And that's how they live every year.
00:34:56.000 It does never change.
00:34:57.000 And yet they're happy as fuck.
00:34:59.000 It's really weird.
00:35:00.000 Because to us it would be hell.
00:35:01.000 To the lady who works at the coffee place, she was bumming out that she didn't have cable.
00:35:06.000 These motherfuckers are fighting mosquitoes like you've never seen.
00:35:10.000 Because the mosquitoes are only alive for a couple of months.
00:35:13.000 They only got a couple of months in Siberia to live.
00:35:15.000 So they go gangster in giant swarms like you've never seen anything like that.
00:35:20.000 And they don't have any raid or any shit like that.
00:35:23.000 Off.
00:35:23.000 Off.
00:35:24.000 They have to cover themselves in tar.
00:35:26.000 They make a tar with bark.
00:35:27.000 They cook the bark down to a tar and then rub it all over their face with, like, oil.
00:35:32.000 Fuck that.
00:35:33.000 Fuck that.
00:35:34.000 I'd be gone.
00:35:34.000 I'd go, fuck this peaceful shit.
00:35:36.000 Can you imagine?
00:35:36.000 You've never seen mosquitoes like this.
00:35:38.000 That's horror.
00:35:39.000 Well, that's one of the beautiful things about LA is that we're not supposed to be here.
00:35:42.000 So life doesn't like it here either.
00:35:44.000 There's not that much here without us.
00:35:46.000 There's not that much water.
00:35:47.000 There's not supposed to be grass.
00:35:48.000 So there's very few bugs.
00:35:49.000 Yeah, there's very few bugs.
00:35:51.000 Like, in the summers in the East Coast, it was fucking terrible.
00:35:54.000 You know, especially like in Boston, if you lived anywhere near a lake, anywhere near a body of water.
00:36:00.000 Oh, the mosquitoes were horrendous, man.
00:36:02.000 They would fuck you up.
00:36:04.000 Nothing like Siberia, dude.
00:36:05.000 Some shit.
00:36:06.000 Yet they're so happy.
00:36:08.000 Yep.
00:36:09.000 But then again, you wouldn't be happy that way.
00:36:11.000 Maybe.
00:36:11.000 You wouldn't be happy.
00:36:12.000 No, you wouldn't.
00:36:12.000 Not if you know your life now.
00:36:14.000 You love tattooing.
00:36:15.000 You love, you know, you love...
00:36:16.000 Yeah, but that doesn't define me.
00:36:17.000 I mean, I don't know.
00:36:19.000 That's true.
00:36:19.000 You could adapt.
00:36:20.000 Yeah, of course you can.
00:36:21.000 Do you think you could be a Siberian princess?
00:36:24.000 I don't know if I want to be a princess, but...
00:36:26.000 Be up there beaver trapping and shit.
00:36:28.000 A warrior, yeah.
00:36:29.000 That would be cool for the first couple of days.
00:36:30.000 Do both.
00:36:30.000 A couple months a year.
00:36:31.000 Fuck it.
00:36:32.000 You go live with them.
00:36:32.000 Until you realize they have no cigarettes.
00:36:34.000 You're like, shit.
00:36:35.000 There's no cigarettes?
00:36:38.000 Like, I want a cigarette so bad.
00:36:40.000 You're like, they're up for two days.
00:36:41.000 And someone will give you some rolled up bullshit that tries to claim it's a cigarette.
00:36:45.000 One issue of Inked Magazine would destroy that culture.
00:36:48.000 Yeah.
00:36:50.000 Oh, anything would destroy it.
00:36:51.000 Access to some other things would destroy it.
00:36:54.000 The idea is that it takes the body somewhere between 10 and maybe even possibly 20,000 or more years to completely change.
00:37:02.000 Like to completely change as far as like for you to have like a genetic response to adaptation to change.
00:37:12.000 So like 10,000 years for us is a long, long time to a human being.
00:37:16.000 But to species, it's really not that much.
00:37:19.000 So in order for things to decide that they're moving in certain directions, then they start changing.
00:37:23.000 And that's one of the things that, like, the really controversial ideas behind autism is that autism is not necessarily a benefit, but that autism might be a new possible way that the brain can operate.
00:37:39.000 You know, with some, like, really high-functioning autistics.
00:37:42.000 It's like what they're showing is, like, even though it's coming through in a disease, and even though it brings with it debilitating social issues and shit like that, The positive aspects of it, like a kid that can look out a window and then draw the whole fucking skyline.
00:37:55.000 Or play the piano.
00:37:55.000 Yeah.
00:37:56.000 What that is, is representing the next stage of human evolution.
00:38:00.000 And that all the information that we're getting from sitting in front of computers, from interacting with each other in a way that no one has ever been able to do before.
00:38:06.000 The brain is just going...
00:38:08.000 We're just redlining that motherfucker.
00:38:10.000 I can't wait to be able to buy that upgrade.
00:38:12.000 Can you imagine that?
00:38:13.000 I wonder if that's going to be available, Brian.
00:38:15.000 It's going to be a pill.
00:38:16.000 It's just going to be like, oh, we're going to fuck up your brain a little.
00:38:18.000 Most likely, if you listen to the real futurists, it's going to be some sort of a hybrid between a human and a computer.
00:38:26.000 It'll be something where...
00:38:27.000 I'll be long gone by then, thank God.
00:38:29.000 You think so, but I don't know about that.
00:38:31.000 I want some autism pills.
00:38:32.000 I don't think so.
00:38:33.000 I don't think you'll be long gone.
00:38:34.000 I think you might experience that.
00:38:36.000 And I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing.
00:38:38.000 I think everybody's worried about every new possible technological thing as being something that separates us from each other.
00:38:45.000 I'm not worried about it.
00:38:46.000 It just seems like a lot of energy to waste on thinking about.
00:38:51.000 I don't know.
00:38:52.000 I mean, then again, I'm not a big fan of reading fiction, I guess.
00:38:57.000 You're not a fan of fiction.
00:38:58.000 You don't even have a television, right?
00:39:00.000 No, I mean, I have like a movie screen.
00:39:03.000 I can watch movies.
00:39:04.000 So you watch movies but no TV? Sometimes, yes.
00:39:05.000 I like documentaries and stuff like that.
00:39:07.000 But you try to avoid TV? No, I do avoid TV. I don't like forced advertisement and I don't like...
00:39:13.000 Well, no, I don't want to complain.
00:39:15.000 I just think that...
00:39:16.000 You can't complain because you're on it, right?
00:39:19.000 No, I mean...
00:39:21.000 When you come in, you could.
00:39:23.000 You can complain.
00:39:24.000 I mean, I could easily...
00:39:25.000 It's easier for me to talk...
00:39:28.000 Shit about, like, point out all the downfalls of my television show versus anyone else.
00:39:33.000 So, like, in vague terms, I think that my problem with it, or my reason that I stay away from it, aside from just being, I got too many ideas that I want to do, and I don't have time, but, like, is that I am too sensitive.
00:39:45.000 So, like, I get heartbroken by billboards.
00:39:48.000 Like, seriously, there was, like, a movie, I remember.
00:39:51.000 There was, like, a movie, and they had billboards everywhere.
00:39:53.000 I don't remember the movie.
00:39:54.000 It was, like...
00:39:55.000 You know, Ashton Kusher and some hot chick or whatever.
00:39:58.000 And he's buttoning up his shirt.
00:40:01.000 She's buttoning up and she's wearing his shirt.
00:40:02.000 And she's getting out of bed and it says something about no strings attached or friends with benefits or some shit.
00:40:08.000 And I was like, that's so sad to me.
00:40:11.000 It's like the opposite of love.
00:40:12.000 You guys just have sex with each other and there's no...
00:40:16.000 I could never...
00:40:18.000 Wow, and you almost cried looking at a billboard?
00:40:21.000 I mean, if I think about it too much, yeah, I do.
00:40:23.000 So it's like I watch, if I were to sit there and watch these television shows where the premise is to like, you know, there's a rich guy and a bunch of girls are fighting over this guy and they're using like their tits and ass as qualities.
00:40:38.000 It's disheartening.
00:40:40.000 So, I mean, I sound like an old lady because...
00:40:41.000 No, you don't.
00:40:42.000 I get it.
00:40:43.000 Every time I see a Circuit City, I feel that way, like an abandoned Circuit City.
00:40:46.000 It's depressing to me.
00:40:47.000 I get sad.
00:40:48.000 There's just an absence of true love, and I guess the romantic in me gets saddened by that.
00:40:52.000 Same with music.
00:40:53.000 I can't listen to music that's too...
00:40:55.000 You can definitely get affected by some shit, especially if you don't know it's coming, and you flip it through the channels.
00:41:00.000 There's some intense fucking movies on.
00:41:04.000 I watched Straw Dogs last night.
00:41:07.000 Do you know what Straw Dogs is?
00:41:08.000 I haven't seen it.
00:41:10.000 There's this insane rape scene in this movie where I turned on the movie right when it was going on.
00:41:16.000 I was like, what fucking movie is this?
00:41:19.000 But for the rest of the night, I was all fucked up.
00:41:21.000 I mean, it becomes...
00:41:23.000 I don't want to say anything about the movie.
00:41:24.000 The movie's very good.
00:41:25.000 But it gets really fucking intense.
00:41:29.000 Whereas the rest of the night I was fucked up.
00:41:31.000 And I ordinarily wouldn't have watched it.
00:41:33.000 But I didn't know what it was.
00:41:34.000 I was just pressing buttons.
00:41:36.000 And then boom, it came on.
00:41:38.000 And fucked my head for the rest of the night.
00:41:40.000 Yeah, and it's weird, and I think it's like we just kind of like, we, I think it's like people become so desensitized, and I guess that's the part that I have a problem with, you know?
00:41:48.000 You see it on Twitter, you see it on Instagram, it's like everybody's so negative and mean and take any opportunity to knock people down.
00:41:54.000 I've never been from that Like, train of thought, you know, because my parents just raised us a lot differently and stuff, and so it, like, I get, like, I get butthurt really easily.
00:42:04.000 That's better, though.
00:42:05.000 You know, you'll attract better people that way, and you'll figure out a way to get away from the people that aren't like that.
00:42:10.000 Oh, yeah.
00:42:10.000 I mean, it's like, yeah, giving that any value is just as bad, I think, but...
00:42:16.000 I just want people to be nice, that's all.
00:42:18.000 I think almost all really expressive people, anybody who's artistic or very expressive, there's always some extreme sensitivity on the other side of it as well.
00:42:28.000 Just is.
00:42:28.000 Just you're intense about everything.
00:42:30.000 You're probably intense about love.
00:42:31.000 You're probably intense about...
00:42:32.000 Yeah, I mean, that's why you cry when you see an Aston Kutcher thing.
00:42:35.000 It's your intensity.
00:42:36.000 You take shit up to a higher level quicker than most people.
00:42:39.000 That's probably what it is.
00:42:40.000 Everything's a symbol, and then I get sad about that, so yeah.
00:42:43.000 But I've been sad.
00:42:44.000 I've cried during previews of depressing movies.
00:42:47.000 What?
00:42:47.000 Yeah, man.
00:42:48.000 What?
00:42:49.000 Good Burger?
00:42:49.000 What?
00:42:50.000 I don't know.
00:42:51.000 You're funny over there.
00:42:52.000 Some sad...
00:42:53.000 Thank you.
00:42:54.000 Don't encourage him.
00:42:55.000 Sorry.
00:42:56.000 How are you doing?
00:42:57.000 How can you say that after all he's done?
00:42:58.000 No!
00:43:00.000 But then there's those moments of brilliance and people are inspiring and great and do awesome shit.
00:43:08.000 Well, that's what we get off each other the most.
00:43:11.000 That's the most beautiful thing that people get from each other.
00:43:14.000 We're inspired by each other.
00:43:15.000 I love going to music because I'm not musical.
00:43:18.000 I can't do anything.
00:43:19.000 So I love going and watching because I feel like it fires me up.
00:43:22.000 Oh, you go to musicals.
00:43:24.000 No, no, no.
00:43:26.000 I love to see music.
00:43:27.000 I love to see people perform.
00:43:28.000 Bands perform.
00:43:29.000 I love to see people do things that I have zero skill in.
00:43:35.000 I was impressed with our last exchange of emails when we were going back and forth on band recommendations.
00:43:42.000 I had no idea that you were into that kind of stuff.
00:43:45.000 Well, the funny thing is...
00:43:47.000 He emailed me and he's like, hey, I want to know, what are you listening to nowadays?
00:43:52.000 I want to get some new music.
00:43:53.000 And I'm like, oh man, where do you start?
00:43:55.000 Give me a genre, you know?
00:43:56.000 You turned me on to so many good songs.
00:43:58.000 So then I was like, alright, here's like 10, and then tell me which ones you like, and then I'll know what kind.
00:44:02.000 I'll be your genius playlist or whatever.
00:44:04.000 Oh wow, that's cool.
00:44:05.000 Dude, you're using Kat Von D for your genius playlist.
00:44:08.000 She's got some great shit.
00:44:10.000 I'm gonna tell you my Kat Von D music story.
00:44:13.000 Most people don't know that she has an amazing voice.
00:44:17.000 She can sing her ass off and she's really shy about it.
00:44:20.000 She's crazy shy about it.
00:44:21.000 Is that true?
00:44:23.000 Well, let me tell you this.
00:44:25.000 She doesn't like talking about it.
00:44:26.000 No, I can't talk about it.
00:44:27.000 I just can't say, like, oh, yeah, it is true.
00:44:28.000 We're both working with the same producer, which is also her best friend.
00:44:32.000 Danny is producing my stuff, and he's messing with her, too, musically as well.
00:44:36.000 So I'm at Danny's, and we're working on some stuff, and he goes, me and...
00:44:41.000 Kat and Wes Borland from Limp Bizkit.
00:44:43.000 He's the guitar player for Wes Borland.
00:44:45.000 He goes, me and Wes are going to do a little benefit song.
00:44:48.000 Oh, yeah.
00:44:48.000 He really helped me out.
00:44:49.000 Like, last minute.
00:44:50.000 I had a beautiful benefit thing.
00:44:50.000 So last minute, they're putting together this song, Last Minute.
00:44:53.000 It's a cover, and she's going to perform at this gay benefit, right?
00:44:56.000 Yeah, it was for Linda Perry's Evening with Women.
00:45:00.000 It's like an awesome...
00:45:01.000 Yeah, so Danny's telling me, Danny, he's like, man, we're trying to put together this song.
00:45:05.000 This could be a disaster.
00:45:05.000 So we had like less than 48 hours to learn this song.
00:45:08.000 It was like that Bronski Beat song.
00:45:09.000 I love Bronski Beat.
00:45:10.000 And like, and I mean, I ended up just like reading it from my iPad as I was traveling and totally fucked it up.
00:45:15.000 But it was fun and it was great and stuff.
00:45:17.000 But then I think I had been recording that night at Linda's and you were at Danny's and I was really excited because I had, because I had like gnarly stage fright issues like for the last year and stuff, just whatever.
00:45:30.000 And so finally, I threw the balls, I guess, to get over them.
00:45:33.000 And so, obviously, Danny's my best friend and we're going to be working on music.
00:45:37.000 So I was like, hey, I want to come over.
00:45:38.000 It was late.
00:45:39.000 I think it was like, what, like almost midnight or something.
00:45:41.000 Yeah, me and Danny are working on stuff.
00:45:42.000 And Linda Perry, for those that don't know, she was the lead singer for Four Non Blondes.
00:45:47.000 She produced Pink's second album, which went Fucking skyrocket.
00:45:51.000 So Linda Perry is a massive musician.
00:45:53.000 She also did Christina Aguilera, too.
00:45:55.000 The big, you're so beautiful.
00:45:57.000 Keep singing.
00:45:59.000 I want to hear this.
00:46:02.000 Linda Perry's a huge...
00:46:04.000 Stop!
00:46:07.000 Right, right?
00:46:08.000 So she's working with Kat now.
00:46:10.000 They're writing some shit together.
00:46:11.000 I'm at Danny's.
00:46:12.000 She's all excited.
00:46:13.000 They recorded a song.
00:46:14.000 They brought it over.
00:46:15.000 Yeah, and then Danny's like, text me, is it cool if Eddie Bravo is...
00:46:18.000 I'm like, yeah, I don't care.
00:46:19.000 I just don't say anything about it.
00:46:21.000 But of course, I had to be in the other room because I was like, I'm not going to sit there and go...
00:46:25.000 Like, you know, what do you think?
00:46:26.000 Or whatever.
00:46:27.000 Yeah, she had to go to the next room.
00:46:28.000 It was just, like, vocal.
00:46:29.000 It wasn't, like, a produced track or anything.
00:46:31.000 And then Danny was all stoked.
00:46:33.000 But he texted me the other day.
00:46:34.000 He's like, man, he's still talking about it.
00:46:36.000 He, like, loved it.
00:46:37.000 Then I'm like, aw, it makes me happy.
00:46:38.000 Is that what Danny said?
00:46:39.000 Yeah.
00:46:39.000 So what ended up happening, and I've told this story a bunch, because, like, the next day at school, I said, most of you guys don't know.
00:46:45.000 You weren't supposed to.
00:46:45.000 Most of you guys don't know this.
00:46:47.000 You can't tell us.
00:46:48.000 Most of you guys don't know this.
00:46:49.000 But I was so impressed with her voice and the actual song.
00:46:53.000 Her and Linda Perry together.
00:46:56.000 I feel with the right marketing, of course, I think it could be huge.
00:47:00.000 Could it be bigger than Paris Hilton's single?
00:47:03.000 I like that song a lot.
00:47:04.000 I bet you did.
00:47:06.000 You should get that shit tattooed on your dick.
00:47:08.000 Well, anyways, the song that Ver and Linda Perry did together, the first one that she brought over, is amazing.
00:47:13.000 What's it called?
00:47:14.000 I'm not going to talk about it yet.
00:47:17.000 Yeah, you can't talk about it, son.
00:47:19.000 She's trying to send you hints.
00:47:20.000 No, no, no.
00:47:21.000 The bottom line is, she's actually a great singer.
00:47:24.000 Her voice is amazing.
00:47:26.000 When I see your artwork, I think you'd be good at anything you want her to be.
00:47:29.000 You'd be amazing.
00:47:30.000 Oh, thanks.
00:47:30.000 If you can draw that well, that's some really high-level shit.
00:47:35.000 You could do that with anything.
00:47:35.000 I really believe that.
00:47:37.000 I believe that with anybody who's super awesome at anything.
00:47:40.000 How many bad tattoos do you see a day of people just coming in?
00:47:43.000 I mean, have you ever seen one that you're just like, wow, that's the worst tattoo I've ever seen?
00:47:47.000 Well, I mean, there's such a big difference in, like, personal preference versus technical aspect of things.
00:47:54.000 So, like, I mean, there's some stuff that's not necessarily technically...
00:47:58.000 It's like everything else, like music.
00:47:59.000 It's like technically might not be the best singer, but the charisma's behind it, and, you know...
00:48:03.000 Blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:48:04.000 Well, there's that style.
00:48:07.000 What was the t-shirt?
00:48:08.000 Ed Hardy.
00:48:09.000 That Ed Hardy sort of style.
00:48:10.000 Oh, like the old school, 1950s traditional stuff.
00:48:13.000 Yeah, which, not that artistic, but people like that look.
00:48:16.000 It's its own art, you know?
00:48:17.000 And I didn't understand it for a long time.
00:48:19.000 My ex-husband was really into doing that kind of artwork, and he's really great at it.
00:48:24.000 There's an art behind it.
00:48:25.000 I personally have not...
00:48:27.000 I'm inclined to do that kind of stuff, but I appreciate it for what it is.
00:48:31.000 So I don't know.
00:48:31.000 I mean, I think I see a lot of great ideas, you know, in people often, and then you just see kind of a poor execution or an inexperienced execution and stuff.
00:48:43.000 But yeah, I mean, I don't know.
00:48:45.000 I see so many amazing things now that blow me out of the water.
00:48:48.000 It's like, fuck, there's so many great artists nowadays.
00:48:51.000 I'm permanently scarred from ever getting a tattoo again because of my tattoo.
00:48:54.000 Really?
00:48:54.000 Because it was a free tattoo.
00:48:56.000 It was somebody practicing for their first time.
00:48:58.000 It took seven hours.
00:48:59.000 It should have taken one hour.
00:49:00.000 God, I remember I used to be that slow too.
00:49:02.000 Yeah.
00:49:03.000 And then I found out it's not even supposed to be an R for my last name.
00:49:07.000 And I found out it means waterfalls now.
00:49:08.000 So now it's like the ugliest tattoo ever with this Chinese letter that means waterfalls.
00:49:12.000 But it's probably small.
00:49:13.000 You can cover it up.
00:49:14.000 Easy.
00:49:14.000 Yeah.
00:49:15.000 Yeah, you just get that shit lasered off, son.
00:49:17.000 They can do that pretty easy now.
00:49:18.000 Especially, like, it's not red.
00:49:20.000 Red is apparently the most difficult color.
00:49:22.000 Yeah, it's got red.
00:49:23.000 It's got red in it.
00:49:24.000 Oh, is it?
00:49:24.000 Yeah.
00:49:25.000 Yeah, they could work that red out.
00:49:26.000 I think red is actually the easiest to get out.
00:49:28.000 Blue and purple.
00:49:29.000 I thought that was blue for some reason.
00:49:30.000 Red is the easiest to get out?
00:49:32.000 Yeah, red and black.
00:49:33.000 And then purples and greens, I think.
00:49:35.000 Blues and greens are a little harder.
00:49:37.000 But it all depends on, like, how...
00:49:39.000 Have you done it?
00:49:40.000 Have you done the lasering off?
00:49:41.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:49:42.000 I lasered a couple.
00:49:43.000 Like, this whole arm got lasered.
00:49:45.000 It used to be...
00:49:45.000 I got, like, this tattoo when I was, like, 15 or 16. It was, like, the New York Dolls, like, cowgirl with a gun.
00:49:52.000 And then there's, like, a flag coming out of it.
00:49:54.000 It says, bang!
00:49:55.000 And at the time, I thought it was cool.
00:49:56.000 I'm like, man, I have the word bang on my arm.
00:49:58.000 I really need to get rid of it.
00:49:59.000 That's better than waterfall.
00:50:01.000 How long did it take?
00:50:02.000 Well, with, like, laser, you have to go for sessions.
00:50:05.000 It's, like, super painful and stuff, but...
00:50:06.000 More painful than tattooing?
00:50:08.000 Fuck yeah.
00:50:09.000 Wow.
00:50:09.000 Well, I'm a wussy, so I don't know.
00:50:11.000 I can't handle it.
00:50:11.000 What?
00:50:12.000 Did you just say?
00:50:12.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:13.000 You have tattoos all over your body, and you're telling me that you're a wussy.
00:50:16.000 Oh my God.
00:50:17.000 Ask anybody at my show.
00:50:18.000 Like 15 minutes, and I tap out.
00:50:19.000 I can't do it.
00:50:20.000 Those are all 15-minute tattoos?
00:50:21.000 No, this was all...
00:50:22.000 A lot of them was under the influence of alcohol, so it was a lot easier, but now...
00:50:26.000 Back in the day.
00:50:27.000 The dizzy, yes.
00:50:28.000 Things were easier.
00:50:29.000 Oh, yeah.
00:50:30.000 Remember that one time when I drank too much?
00:50:32.000 Do I remember it?
00:50:33.000 No.
00:50:34.000 I think we have that on video somewhere.
00:50:36.000 Just you saying that is hilarious.
00:50:38.000 Because I can just go through a Rolodex in my head of any moment that sentence could apply to.
00:50:44.000 He wrote a blog about my alcohol problem.
00:50:48.000 Do you have one?
00:50:48.000 No, no, I don't have an alcohol.
00:50:49.000 I'm not an alcoholic, but I will drink a lot on special occasions.
00:50:53.000 And when I pass a certain point, the Indian comes out, as Joey Diaz says.
00:50:57.000 And when the Indian comes out, for sure I'm not going to remember any of the night.
00:51:00.000 He blacks out.
00:51:02.000 Is it fun, though?
00:51:03.000 Or is he like the one that's like, oh, I love you, man?
00:51:05.000 No, no, no, he hates it.
00:51:07.000 He's a great guy.
00:51:08.000 The problem is he completely checks out and he doesn't know where he is.
00:51:12.000 And he literally is like a third of a mind controlled by a demon from another galaxy.
00:51:20.000 He's like a one-third Eddie and two-thirds some demonic alcohol-sucking demon from another planet.
00:51:27.000 Yeah.
00:51:28.000 It's weird.
00:51:29.000 I'm not evil though.
00:51:30.000 No, never evil.
00:51:31.000 I don't mean that.
00:51:32.000 I mean like possessed by the alcohol.
00:51:35.000 It's like just wandering around.
00:51:37.000 He doesn't know what happens until the next day when he sobers up.
00:51:40.000 You have to tell him what happens.
00:51:42.000 I've had to get his hotel door opened by security.
00:51:47.000 Banging on his door in Germany when we were supposed to leave.
00:51:50.000 Banging on his door.
00:51:50.000 Finally the door opens.
00:51:53.000 Eddie is lying in bed with his cowboy boots on.
00:51:56.000 And the light is on.
00:51:58.000 The light is on.
00:51:59.000 He's completely, just completely out cold.
00:52:03.000 I go, Eddie!
00:52:04.000 We gotta go to the fucking airport!
00:52:06.000 He's like, what's up?
00:52:07.000 He just looks at me and the security guard goes, hey, what's up?
00:52:10.000 Yeah, like, I'm trying to play it off.
00:52:12.000 Like, hey, what's up, guys?
00:52:14.000 That's not the worst story.
00:52:15.000 That's not even the worst story.
00:52:16.000 The car one is the crazy one.
00:52:18.000 The car one is the worst.
00:52:19.000 I talked to him.
00:52:20.000 It was like, I was having breakfast.
00:52:22.000 It was like 7 o'clock in the morning.
00:52:23.000 And the car was gonna come at 9.00.
00:52:25.000 And he calls me while we're having breakfast.
00:52:27.000 He's still fucked up.
00:52:28.000 I mean, he is fucked up.
00:52:30.000 The plan was to drink all night and walk onto the airplane and then sleep all the way back.
00:52:34.000 Yeah.
00:52:35.000 So, like, stay up all night, right?
00:52:36.000 Yeah.
00:52:37.000 So, you know, I go, are you fucked up?
00:52:41.000 Did you stay up all night?
00:52:42.000 I said, yeah, fuck yeah, man.
00:52:43.000 I'm going to power through.
00:52:44.000 I'm going to power through.
00:52:45.000 And so I go, okay, well, we're leaving at 8.30, all right?
00:52:48.000 You gotta be down there for the car at 8.30.
00:52:49.000 No problem, no problem.
00:52:51.000 So I eat breakfast.
00:52:52.000 An hour and a half later, I go out for, you know, waiting for him.
00:52:55.000 It's an hour and, you know, hour and a half.
00:52:58.000 Sitting here.
00:52:58.000 Ten minutes later, I'm like, okay, what the fuck is going on?
00:53:00.000 So I talk to the guy who's the valet.
00:53:02.000 I go, hey, is my car here?
00:53:05.000 And the guy says, what's your name?
00:53:06.000 I said, Rogan.
00:53:07.000 He goes, oh, Rogan already left.
00:53:09.000 I go, no, no, no.
00:53:09.000 Rogan is me.
00:53:10.000 He goes, no, Rogan already left.
00:53:12.000 I go, what did he look like?
00:53:13.000 He said, well, he had long hair at the time.
00:53:15.000 He said, long hair, tattoos.
00:53:16.000 I'm like, that motherfucker.
00:53:18.000 So I call him up.
00:53:19.000 And first of all, he answers the phone and then just hangs up.
00:53:22.000 I was like, shit.
00:53:23.000 Couldn't realize.
00:53:24.000 I'm in the back of this car.
00:53:24.000 And then the phone went.
00:53:26.000 He didn't even know what he did.
00:53:27.000 I wake up.
00:53:28.000 And I see it's Joe calling.
00:53:29.000 I'm like, what?
00:53:31.000 I go, what's up?
00:53:31.000 He goes, you took my car.
00:53:33.000 And I hung up.
00:53:35.000 We're on the Autobahn, and I tell the driver, where are we going?
00:53:37.000 He goes, we're going to the airport!
00:53:39.000 I'm like, oh shit!
00:53:41.000 And then he keeps calling back.
00:53:42.000 I don't think that was the Autobahn.
00:53:44.000 I don't know what it was, but we're flying up.
00:53:45.000 I think it was just a regular highway.
00:53:47.000 Well, it sounds like a good time.
00:53:49.000 Yeah, it was ridiculous.
00:53:50.000 He woke up in the car.
00:53:51.000 I kept sending it to my message, or my answering service, or whatever, and I had to figure out what the hell was going on.
00:53:59.000 And then I finally answered.
00:54:01.000 He's so fucking mad.
00:54:02.000 I'm like, holy shit, I'm sorry.
00:54:03.000 I have no idea what happened.
00:54:04.000 I just woke up in the back of the car.
00:54:05.000 I don't remember the whole night.
00:54:07.000 I must have passed and just jumped in his car.
00:54:10.000 But this is like total, like, if Eddie, there's a certain number of drinks where he gets over where he'll just disappear.
00:54:16.000 And he's gone.
00:54:17.000 The Aubrey story, the Texas one?
00:54:20.000 Don't get into that.
00:54:22.000 I was just going to bring up the end.
00:54:25.000 What?
00:54:26.000 He's shaking his head no.
00:54:28.000 You know what else I found out?
00:54:29.000 I found out my cat in Japanese means waterfalls.
00:54:32.000 Oh, that's perfect.
00:54:32.000 And I'm like thinking something's fucked up with waterfalls.
00:54:35.000 What are you talking about?
00:54:35.000 What cat in Japanese?
00:54:36.000 Techie in Japanese means waterfalls.
00:54:38.000 I found out the other day.
00:54:39.000 Really?
00:54:39.000 You're fine then.
00:54:40.000 You should be celebrating your tattoo.
00:54:42.000 I don't want to go chasing waterfalls this much.
00:54:44.000 I need to know why.
00:54:45.000 What's that song from?
00:54:46.000 What was that band?
00:54:47.000 TLC. TLC. That was a sweet song.
00:54:50.000 I'm never going to walk in the ocean because I might come out of Blob.
00:54:54.000 Brian, you need to go outside and get some air.
00:54:56.000 So what are your plans for your music?
00:54:58.000 What's the plan?
00:55:00.000 Well, you know, the coolest thing I think with Linda is we're moving forward without any...
00:55:08.000 Deadlines.
00:55:10.000 No, it's not the deadlines.
00:55:11.000 We have goals, obviously, but by summertime I think it should be done out, which is exciting.
00:55:16.000 But I think it's like we're not really congesting our thoughts with anything right now.
00:55:21.000 We're just writing music without outside voices, no reference, just, you know...
00:55:25.000 So you said you got over your stage, Fred.
00:55:27.000 Are you going to start doing live performances?
00:55:28.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:55:29.000 I'm putting your band together.
00:55:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:55:32.000 You're going to go on tour?
00:55:33.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:55:34.000 Holy shit.
00:55:35.000 Wow.
00:55:35.000 She's going to be a rock star.
00:55:36.000 Watch.
00:55:36.000 Are you going to be a rock star?
00:55:38.000 That term is so weird to me.
00:55:40.000 It seems like you can sneak it through from the back door, just from having talent and being on TV. You just sneak it right through.
00:55:49.000 I don't know.
00:55:49.000 I want to do everything, even small things, with a lot of quality.
00:55:53.000 And so I think with the music stuff, I just want to make it as good as possible, for lack of a better...
00:56:01.000 Yeah, so I think people will probably be pleasantly surprised in the sense that they're expecting me to fail as usual.
00:56:07.000 I like it.
00:56:07.000 People are expecting you to fail?
00:56:09.000 I think people always expect you to fail.
00:56:11.000 Really?
00:56:12.000 Yeah, I mean, other than your friends, obviously.
00:56:13.000 I'm talking about like, you know, Yeah, I think so.
00:56:16.000 Especially me, because I was on TV, so it's like, oh, you're just doing...
00:56:19.000 That's definitely true.
00:56:20.000 If you have some success, they want it to be over.
00:56:22.000 It's hard to get into music after you're already famous for something else.
00:56:25.000 It's tough.
00:56:26.000 Has anybody ever done it well?
00:56:28.000 Jamie Foxx?
00:56:29.000 Steve Martin.
00:56:30.000 Sort of.
00:56:31.000 Steve Martin?
00:56:32.000 His band's pretty big for a certain kind of music.
00:56:35.000 Oh, he does just plain music shows, right?
00:56:38.000 Yeah, he does.
00:56:39.000 He plays banjo and stuff.
00:56:42.000 It's a certain style of music, but he's successful in that.
00:56:46.000 Anybody else?
00:56:47.000 Eddie Murphy.
00:56:48.000 Oh, that's right.
00:56:48.000 He had a party all the time.
00:56:50.000 Party all the time.
00:56:52.000 That's kind of like what my stuff sounds like.
00:56:54.000 Like that?
00:56:55.000 Really?
00:56:55.000 That's cool.
00:56:56.000 What kind of shit do you sound like?
00:56:58.000 What does it sound like?
00:56:59.000 You know what?
00:57:00.000 Linda and I both have tried figuring it out.
00:57:02.000 A dark Sarah McLachlan kind of.
00:57:04.000 Oof!
00:57:04.000 Stop it.
00:57:05.000 Don't say that kind of stuff.
00:57:06.000 Is that bad?
00:57:07.000 What's wrong?
00:57:08.000 I could never compare myself to anybody.
00:57:10.000 She just calls it powerfully pathetic, which is good.
00:57:15.000 Power...
00:57:16.000 Powerfully pathetic, I think.
00:57:18.000 Powerfully pathetic?
00:57:18.000 It's all very sad and tragic and romantic, but there's elements of classical music and stuff and some electronic elements.
00:57:24.000 So there won't be any Sheryl Crow type, all I want to do is have some fun?
00:57:27.000 I don't even know what that is.
00:57:29.000 You don't know that song?
00:57:30.000 All I want to do...
00:57:33.000 Stop it, guys!
00:57:35.000 I thought you were supposed to talk about manly stuff.
00:57:38.000 Listen, we're so manly we take it in the other direction.
00:57:42.000 We're not scared to talk Sheryl Crow.
00:57:44.000 That's a great song.
00:57:45.000 It's a great fucking song.
00:57:46.000 You don't like that kind of music?
00:57:48.000 No, I just don't know.
00:57:50.000 What do you listen to personally?
00:57:52.000 Kent.
00:57:53.000 Kent is one of my favorite bands.
00:57:54.000 I like a lot of Scandinavian music.
00:57:56.000 I like a lot of metal and I love Depeche Mode and The Cure and shit like that.
00:58:00.000 So, a lot of obscure shit that people wouldn't be aware of, and then a lot of classic shit like Suzie and the Banshees.
00:58:06.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:58:07.000 I don't even listen to anything that's made before 1980 anymore.
00:58:11.000 Black Sabbath?
00:58:12.000 No.
00:58:13.000 I listen to some Black Keys.
00:58:15.000 That's the only modern shit I listen to.
00:58:17.000 And then everything else is old stuff.
00:58:19.000 All I've been listening to is like Allman Brothers.
00:58:20.000 Oh, yeah.
00:58:21.000 I love Allman Brothers.
00:58:22.000 After 80. Okay, I see what you're saying.
00:58:24.000 Did I say before?
00:58:25.000 I thought you did.
00:58:26.000 I'm sorry.
00:58:27.000 Anything after 1980, I'm like, done.
00:58:29.000 I'm done.
00:58:29.000 Except the Black Keys.
00:58:30.000 The Black Keys seem to have kept the soul.
00:58:32.000 And Honey Honey.
00:58:32.000 And Honey Honey.
00:58:33.000 Yeah, that's right.
00:58:34.000 They're my friends.
00:58:35.000 What a dick I am.
00:58:37.000 Oh, yeah.
00:58:37.000 That guy, too.
00:58:39.000 The 80s had some of the best shit ever.
00:58:41.000 But I mean, like, modern bands that you hear on the radio that are big hits.
00:58:45.000 I can't get into any of this shit.
00:58:46.000 I don't even know.
00:58:47.000 I couldn't even tell you.
00:58:48.000 I'm at a supermarket every now and then.
00:58:50.000 That's the only time I hear music.
00:58:51.000 I'm shopping.
00:58:52.000 And I'm like, what the fuck is this?
00:58:54.000 Is this something new?
00:58:55.000 It's Deadmau5.
00:58:56.000 No.
00:58:57.000 It'd be some weird fucking auto-tuned bullshit and it's repeating itself over and over again.
00:59:04.000 I'm like, is this the new shit?
00:59:05.000 Is this popular right now?
00:59:07.000 I feel like I'm some dude who's like an outlier, like comes into town every now and then to find out what the folks are up to.
00:59:13.000 That's what it feels like.
00:59:14.000 And as I get older and older, it becomes more and more apparent.
00:59:16.000 I can understand.
00:59:17.000 I like some pop music, I guess.
00:59:20.000 But I think it's hard for me to wrap my mind around certain things like, how does that resonate with people?
00:59:25.000 Because for me, I love poetry and I love things that are so much more profound.
00:59:29.000 And I think people are hungry for that.
00:59:32.000 Even though a lot of the stuff that's really big right now is very superficial and whatever, but I feel like there is definitely...
00:59:40.000 I think people are...
00:59:42.000 hurting and they want to relate somehow so I don't know Well, yeah, I definitely think that, but I also think there's a lot of music that some people just aren't even aware of.
00:59:52.000 Of course.
00:59:53.000 There's a lot of young kids today that don't even know what a whole lot of love sounds like when you hear it through really good speakers.
00:59:59.000 Yeah, but the other day, man, I was driving down Hollywood, and I seen these awesome fucking metalheads, and they were carrying skateboards as young kids, and one had a death shirt on, and the other one had a motorhead shirt on.
01:00:10.000 I literally rolled my window down, and my friend Allison was in, and I'm like, Hey, I love you guys.
01:00:16.000 And they're like, I love you too.
01:00:18.000 With their skateboards.
01:00:19.000 You got just fucking long hair.
01:00:20.000 Metal will never die.
01:00:21.000 So cool.
01:00:22.000 Yeah, I thought metal was gone in the 80s.
01:00:25.000 I thought, like, this shit is not going to last.
01:00:26.000 Yeah, and then, like, listen to, like, obscure black metal and stuff that's, like, you know, I don't know, it's cool.
01:00:29.000 I like it.
01:00:29.000 Metal will never die.
01:00:31.000 It won't.
01:00:31.000 That feeling will never die because there's always going to be shitty parenting.
01:00:35.000 You're never going to get rid of metal because you're never going to make people become good parents.
01:00:40.000 You're always going to have people who just want to...
01:00:46.000 They just want to pound on the walls, fucking scream, and just curse their circumstances.
01:00:52.000 And turn crosses upside down.
01:00:53.000 Yeah, you're always going to have shitty parenting, so you're always going to have metal.
01:00:56.000 I did all that shit.
01:00:57.000 I bet that shit is on a computer.
01:00:58.000 I wrote satanic lyrics like...
01:01:01.000 Every song had to be...
01:01:02.000 Come on, son!
01:01:02.000 It either had to be about...
01:01:04.000 When I was 14, 15, 16, all the songs I wrote were nuclear war, anti-religion, demons killing priests.
01:01:14.000 Did you do any love songs?
01:01:15.000 Nothing about love?
01:01:16.000 No, no.
01:01:16.000 Not until, like, I was 19 or 20. In your defense, though, when we were kids, when we were growing up, you know, we're older than you.
01:01:23.000 You probably don't recognize that Soviet Union threat feeling.
01:01:27.000 Did you ever have that threat when you were a kid?
01:01:29.000 Did you ever feel that?
01:01:30.000 See, when Eddie and I grew up, we were really worried that we were going to get into a nuclear war with the Soviet Union.
01:01:36.000 Really?
01:01:36.000 Oh yeah, bro.
01:01:37.000 Is that bad?
01:01:37.000 Bro, everybody did.
01:01:38.000 Dude, nuclear war was such a popular...
01:01:40.000 It was so close.
01:01:41.000 Is that like when dinosaurs roamed the earth?
01:01:43.000 How dare you?
01:01:44.000 How dare you?
01:01:45.000 Look, it's possible today, but back then it was not just possible, it seemed probable.
01:01:51.000 70s, like late 70s?
01:01:52.000 Late 70s, early 80s, everybody thought we were going to war with Russia.
01:01:56.000 That was a fact.
01:01:57.000 Until Ronald Reagan and Chernobyl effectively bankrupted the Soviet Union.
01:02:02.000 That's one of the big things that brought it down.
01:02:04.000 But when the Soviet Union fell apart, then everybody took a deep breath and relaxed.
01:02:08.000 But until that happened, there was always this constant thread that they were going to take us over.
01:02:13.000 World War III. Yeah.
01:02:14.000 They were in Cuba.
01:02:16.000 I mean, they were 90 miles from our border setting up missile silos.
01:02:19.000 I mean, there was a lot of shit that went down during the Kennedy administration.
01:02:22.000 So there was that feeling, especially as technology increased.
01:02:26.000 And then there was that Star Wars program that came on where they were developing these fucking things to shoot missiles out of the sky.
01:02:33.000 They'd be like satellites that were launched up with lasers to zap missiles out of the sky.
01:02:37.000 That's like a significant part of the budget and a significant part of what Ronald Reagan was talking about when they were talking about national defense.
01:02:43.000 So we were worried about going to war with Russia.
01:02:45.000 It was constant when we were kids.
01:02:47.000 Very popular song topic.
01:02:49.000 Seems fucked up, right?
01:02:50.000 It doesn't even make sense to you.
01:02:52.000 It was a band called Nuclear Assault.
01:02:53.000 The song was called Nuclear Death.
01:02:56.000 Nuclear death.
01:02:56.000 Nuclear dick suck.
01:02:58.000 Yeah.
01:02:59.000 Nuclear, what else?
01:03:00.000 Oh, there's a crazy...
01:03:01.000 Nuclear holocaust!
01:03:03.000 I'll have to put it up later.
01:03:04.000 Have you seen that video, Brian, that the Holocaust survivor, or excuse me, the Hiroshima survivor made?
01:03:11.000 No.
01:03:11.000 He made a cartoon.
01:03:13.000 You gotta pull it up.
01:03:15.000 I forget the guy's name.
01:03:16.000 Something Ben.
01:03:17.000 Is it gonna make me sad?
01:03:18.000 Oh, it's crazy.
01:03:19.000 I don't wanna be sad.
01:03:20.000 Well, it's a cartoon that was written by a survivor.
01:03:24.000 From Hiroshima.
01:03:25.000 And it depicting how it was, like what the experience was like for the people on the ground.
01:03:30.000 It's fucked up, man.
01:03:32.000 Because even though it's just a cartoon, I mean...
01:03:34.000 You guys have to watch it after I leave.
01:03:36.000 You can't handle it?
01:03:37.000 You don't want to watch it in front of us?
01:03:38.000 The less I know, the better about it.
01:03:40.000 Really?
01:03:41.000 Sometimes.
01:03:42.000 I don't know.
01:03:43.000 I'll get sad.
01:03:44.000 It's kind of crazy there's like 10 different countries or more that has nuclear weapons.
01:03:48.000 I mean, how many have them?
01:03:50.000 Seven.
01:03:50.000 I don't know.
01:03:51.000 You just taking guesses over there, son?
01:03:53.000 Yeah.
01:03:53.000 I mean, we know Pakistan, India, the UK certainly has them.
01:03:57.000 You know, in the Korean War, we made 18 Korean cities disappear.
01:04:02.000 We did?
01:04:02.000 18. That's why they fucking hate us, man.
01:04:05.000 They're like, no more.
01:04:06.000 No more of this bullshit.
01:04:07.000 They just shut themselves off from the world.
01:04:09.000 Can you imagine that?
01:04:10.000 18 cities disappear.
01:04:11.000 Yeah.
01:04:12.000 And it was no nuclear.
01:04:13.000 It was all like, what, hydrogen bombs and shit?
01:04:15.000 I don't know the bombs they used, but they made 18, they leveled 18 cities in Korea during the Korean War.
01:04:21.000 Jesus Christ.
01:04:21.000 That's crazy shit.
01:04:23.000 They don't talk about that too much.
01:04:25.000 Yeah, wrap your head around that.
01:04:26.000 Try thinking about 18 American cities just disappearing.
01:04:29.000 Yeah.
01:04:30.000 Yeah, the whole game changed when you can fly.
01:04:33.000 When you can fly and shoot shit from the sky, that's the game changer.
01:04:37.000 And it all happened all at once.
01:04:38.000 Fly, shoot things from the sky, and then almost right after that, nuclear bombs.
01:04:43.000 It's pretty nutty when you think about that.
01:04:44.000 Because there was no fucking airport or airplane wars just a hundred years ago.
01:04:50.000 In the early 1900s, they weren't fucking flying everywhere and dropping bombs on each other.
01:04:55.000 They started doing that in the 30s and the 40s.
01:04:58.000 That's when, like, they started getting better at rocketry, and then BOOM! 47, nuclear bomb, complete game changer.
01:05:04.000 The whole thing takes less than a hundred years to go from the airplane being fucking invented to dropping nuclear bombs on people is a hundred years.
01:05:13.000 That's nuts, man.
01:05:14.000 Have you ever tattooed a nuclear missile?
01:05:16.000 I never even thought of that.
01:05:17.000 Actually, yeah, I think I have.
01:05:19.000 I've really never even thought of that until just now.
01:05:21.000 That is a crazy number.
01:05:23.000 That the invention of the airplane, it goes invention of the airplane all the way to nuclear bombs and it's in less than a hundred years.
01:05:30.000 So in essentially one lifetime, we go from people stuck on the ground or in boats to someone who can drop a fucking nuclear bomb on your country.
01:05:39.000 That's amazing!
01:05:41.000 What a fucking weird jump in history that is.
01:05:44.000 That might be the biggest jump in history that's ever been recorded.
01:05:47.000 I never even thought about it.
01:05:49.000 Man, there's nowhere to go, is there?
01:05:51.000 Only crazy.
01:05:53.000 Where?
01:05:53.000 Crazy is the only way to go.
01:05:55.000 I'm moving to Finland.
01:05:57.000 Finland?
01:05:58.000 A lot of death metal there.
01:05:59.000 I love Finland.
01:06:01.000 What do you love about Finland?
01:06:02.000 What?
01:06:02.000 It's easier to go to Alaska, probably.
01:06:05.000 Yeah, but Finland's so much cooler.
01:06:07.000 Alaska's gorgeous, though.
01:06:09.000 We can make Alaska cool.
01:06:10.000 We just have to have more cool people move up there.
01:06:13.000 You're friends with the singer from HIM, right?
01:06:15.000 Yeah.
01:06:17.000 You're totally into them.
01:06:18.000 Are they from Finland?
01:06:20.000 Yeah.
01:06:21.000 They're Finnish.
01:06:22.000 It's almost like a satanic love metal band, right?
01:06:26.000 Oh, wow.
01:06:26.000 How would you describe him?
01:06:28.000 It means his infernal majesty.
01:06:30.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.
01:06:32.000 Someone needs to hold that dude down.
01:06:34.000 No, I think it was taken from a good...
01:06:37.000 Hold that down.
01:06:37.000 Make him take his pills.
01:06:40.000 He's spotting all over my couch.
01:06:42.000 Super poppy metal, but like satanic love suicide.
01:06:46.000 It's crazy.
01:06:47.000 I like it.
01:06:48.000 I actually like it.
01:06:49.000 Hill sprints.
01:06:50.000 Maybe a sandbag workout would be good.
01:06:53.000 Dig a hole for today.
01:06:55.000 I want you to be happy you're alive.
01:06:57.000 I want you to dig a hole, and when you're done, I'm going to give you a cold drink.
01:07:00.000 You're going to feel awesome.
01:07:03.000 It's not bad.
01:07:06.000 Why Finland?
01:07:07.000 Why would you escape to Finland?
01:07:08.000 I love Finland.
01:07:09.000 I used to go there once a year for a long time.
01:07:11.000 If the shit hit the fan in America, is that what you would do?
01:07:14.000 I would go to Canada.
01:07:14.000 No, I was just saying it's like there's not really anywhere to go, really, when you think about it.
01:07:19.000 I think Canada is a move.
01:07:20.000 At least you would find out what the fuck is going on for a little bit, maybe a couple years of safety before you had to escape to Antarctica.
01:07:26.000 Yeah, but let's go back to the Siberians.
01:07:28.000 Like, do they even know about it?
01:07:30.000 No, and guess what?
01:07:30.000 They're just happy.
01:07:31.000 They are happy, but you wouldn't be happy.
01:07:34.000 I mean, you say you might be adaptive, but man, you would remember the internet.
01:07:37.000 You would remember driving around in your bad-ass car, listening to your favorite songs.
01:07:41.000 You know what, Matt?
01:07:41.000 When I was on my book tour last year, halfway through, my house burned down, and it demolished, you know, just gone.
01:07:48.000 Wow.
01:07:48.000 I used to live down the street from Danny, and I remember I went on the rest of the book tour, you know, I think I had like A month or two after, and went through Canada, and I just didn't tell anybody, just kind of, you know, hey, I'm here, and I literally had, like, what I was wearing, and that was it.
01:08:04.000 And then when I came back, you know, I told Kat, the other Kat, my assistant, like, I don't really want anything when I get back.
01:08:10.000 I'm just going to have a gallery next door to my tattoo shop.
01:08:14.000 It's like an art gallery, and we had, like, an upstairs area that was for stock, you know, and, like, Probably the size of your bathroom or something.
01:08:22.000 And she went and got an air mattress from Target, which I was like, oh no, it's too much, it's too much, you know?
01:08:27.000 But it was so weird having to...
01:08:29.000 It's too much?
01:08:31.000 Yeah, it was easier just being as simple as possible, you know?
01:08:34.000 You don't even want an air mattress.
01:08:36.000 You're going super minimalist.
01:08:37.000 Well, she got it, so I got it.
01:08:37.000 So then I slept on an air mattress.
01:08:40.000 And yeah, it was fucking awesome.
01:08:42.000 Was this like an exercise for you?
01:08:44.000 Like an exercise of letting things go?
01:08:46.000 No, I mean, I never struggled with it from the minute I got the news.
01:08:50.000 But, I mean, I was in a clear place.
01:08:52.000 Even when I say exercise, I don't mean necessarily like a strain, but like a direct path that you chose to take.
01:08:58.000 A direct path of a minimalist.
01:09:01.000 Yeah, conscious decision.
01:09:02.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:09:02.000 And I mean, I've done it like in other ways too.
01:09:05.000 It's not a matter of...
01:09:07.000 Depriving myself, but punishing myself.
01:09:09.000 I was celibate for a year.
01:09:12.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.
01:09:14.000 What?
01:09:14.000 Hey!
01:09:15.000 Oh my God, blasphemy!
01:09:16.000 But I'm just saying, as he leaves...
01:09:21.000 I think he's going to go beat off.
01:09:23.000 No!
01:09:24.000 Oh, you don't know him.
01:09:25.000 He's crazy.
01:09:26.000 He's quick with it, too.
01:09:27.000 Celibate for a year.
01:09:27.000 He'll be back in before we even need him.
01:09:29.000 Yeah, that's ridiculous.
01:09:30.000 Why would you do that?
01:09:31.000 I love how when I was at the time, they were like on purpose.
01:09:35.000 Well, first of all, I think that's way easier for a woman to do, not just physically, but psychologically, because there's more dickhead dudes.
01:09:43.000 And dickhead dudes are dangerous, whereas girls that are a pain in the ass if you date them, they're very rarely dangerous.
01:09:49.000 It's not like the weird feeling of intimidation.
01:09:50.000 Girls seem so much more emotional and annoying.
01:09:53.000 You can get emotional, that's for sure, but it's not like you've been beat up or anything.
01:09:58.000 I know women who have been hit by men, and then they're done with men for years.
01:10:02.000 I mean, that makes sense, though, to me.
01:10:04.000 Whereas a guy taking a year off of sex is like, well, you can't find a nice chick.
01:10:08.000 It wasn't about being reactive to something, like, oh, I got hurt.
01:10:12.000 No, it was just more as making a conscious decision at the time.
01:10:16.000 Imagine if he had just a one-year yeast infection that was a motherfucker.
01:10:19.000 I don't even know what that would be like.
01:10:21.000 It wouldn't even go out.
01:10:22.000 Eddie's not even paying attention.
01:10:23.000 I know.
01:10:24.000 We've lost everybody now.
01:10:25.000 Eddie, we lost you totally, man.
01:10:27.000 No, but you know, it's just like, I don't know.
01:10:31.000 Celibacy bores me.
01:10:32.000 Yeah, it just shuts him off.
01:10:33.000 He's like, I'm done.
01:10:35.000 He just checked out totally.
01:10:36.000 He's thinking of his new song he's working on.
01:10:39.000 Working on jujitsu moves in his head.
01:10:41.000 I was looking at that Naughty Show thing.
01:10:43.000 I've been looking at that girl's boob this entire time.
01:10:45.000 It's pretty nice, right?
01:10:46.000 It's pretty nice.
01:10:47.000 For a mannequin, it's about as hot as it gets.
01:10:50.000 She's pretty sexy.
01:10:52.000 She's Brian's.
01:10:53.000 All this stuff is Brian's.
01:10:54.000 This has nothing to do with me.
01:10:56.000 I don't want to be judged by this.
01:10:58.000 He's a silly guy.
01:11:00.000 He's got a lot of weird shit on the wall.
01:11:01.000 Did he really leave because I said that word, the C word?
01:11:03.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:11:04.000 He just has to probably smoke a cigarette or something.
01:11:06.000 Oh, okay.
01:11:06.000 He's an odd duck, but we make an interesting combination.
01:11:09.000 That's good.
01:11:10.000 He's a strange fucking dude.
01:11:11.000 It's hard finding someone that strange that also is kind of funny and knows how to run things.
01:11:16.000 Oh, nice.
01:11:17.000 So, we've got a weird little relationship, me and that guy.
01:11:20.000 Yeah, but going back to the Siberians, they are happy.
01:11:26.000 What about nuclear war?
01:11:27.000 We're going to pass right over.
01:11:29.000 We're done with that?
01:11:29.000 Yeah, we're done with that.
01:11:30.000 I think the Siberians, like we were saying, I think they're only happy because they don't know about all the groovy shit we have.
01:11:37.000 They don't know about iPhones.
01:11:39.000 They don't know the iPhone 5 is going to be out in a week.
01:11:42.000 They don't know about that shit.
01:11:44.000 Is it really?
01:11:45.000 They never drove.
01:11:46.000 Yeah, I see you're all excited.
01:11:47.000 You're thinking, I'm going to get my assistant to go get me one.
01:11:50.000 You know, fucking Siberian dudes that never drove a nice car, never listened to a good stereo.
01:11:54.000 They only think they're happy out there chasing down beaver pills.
01:11:58.000 That shit's ridiculous.
01:11:59.000 I think you could be way more happy today, like in a way higher, peakier sort of a way, but there's a lot of crashes today.
01:12:06.000 There's a lot of, what does it all mean?
01:12:08.000 But then there's like, wow, it's the most awesome time.
01:12:11.000 Because we're not ready for that yet.
01:12:13.000 It's too much work.
01:12:14.000 Well, it's an amazing amount of work the whole species is going to have to do.
01:12:18.000 And people are lazy.
01:12:19.000 It's that and they're also busy.
01:12:21.000 You know, people have to feed themselves and pay their bills and get caught up in that sort of a work cycle where you're doing something with your time every day just in order to stay alive.
01:12:30.000 And it's real hard to get on another path once you're on that path.
01:12:33.000 Yeah, it's just bad habits, I guess, right?
01:12:36.000 It's not even bad habits.
01:12:37.000 It's almost just necessity.
01:12:38.000 If you want to get by in life and you're a person who's, you know, you have a degree and then all of a sudden you have a job and then all of a sudden you have a mortgage and you have a family or whatever the fuck it is that you have.
01:12:48.000 Is it X, Y, or Z? The beginning or is it the full money?
01:12:52.000 What do you have that's holding you back?
01:12:54.000 But when you get to a certain point, when you've accumulated like a mortgage, you've accumulated a car lease and insurance and all this different shit that you have to pay for counseling, it's very, very hard to break free and get your shit together.
01:13:06.000 It's very hard to do what you're doing right now.
01:13:08.000 You got on the right path.
01:13:10.000 You were on this like hell-bent-for-leather thing, like it's either going to work or it's not going to work.
01:13:14.000 No, I'd love to just pre-scode.
01:13:16.000 Boom!
01:13:16.000 You just went out there and it worked.
01:13:18.000 It worked fantastic and amazing.
01:13:20.000 But the reality is for a lot of people when they got on the wrong track and then they got to change tracks, that's when shit gets hard.
01:13:27.000 The key is you got to get on that right track from the get-go.
01:13:30.000 Like doing repair work on your life.
01:13:32.000 No, no.
01:13:33.000 Going back and...
01:13:33.000 You can always get on the track, I think.
01:13:36.000 You think so?
01:13:36.000 Yeah.
01:13:36.000 I think you can always if you're willing to just go for it.
01:13:39.000 Yeah.
01:13:39.000 But most people are not really financially able to do that.
01:13:43.000 It's too hard.
01:13:44.000 It's too hard if you have obligations.
01:13:46.000 It'd be hard to live a life that was dictated by, I guess, financials.
01:13:51.000 Yeah, it sucks.
01:13:53.000 Nothing ever gets done that way.
01:13:54.000 You know, especially creatively.
01:13:56.000 That's like the worst possible reason you could be creating art.
01:14:00.000 It's like, just thinking, I'm gonna get paid!
01:14:03.000 Just make, you know, all your illustrations be about how much money can I make off of this.
01:14:08.000 Probably wouldn't even work.
01:14:10.000 No, of course not.
01:14:11.000 They'd come out all clunky and shit.
01:14:12.000 And insincere, yeah.
01:14:13.000 Yeah.
01:14:14.000 Like music.
01:14:15.000 Or bad comic book artists.
01:14:18.000 Right?
01:14:18.000 Why does he laugh?
01:14:20.000 You know what I'm talking about?
01:14:21.000 You don't even have your own microphone.
01:14:23.000 Bad comic book artist.
01:14:24.000 Yeah, do you remember when you were a kid and you'd get comic books and every now and then some new idiot was like drawing the Hulk and you're like, what is this guy doing?
01:14:31.000 Like the Hulk doesn't even look like this.
01:14:32.000 I thought it was worse when like, they like, remember Spider-Man when McFarlane used to draw it and it was like really cool and then I guess McFarlane wanted to like leave or whatever and do his own thing.
01:14:41.000 So they found somebody that just copied his own style of art and that was really weird.
01:14:45.000 Is that Todd McFarlane, the Spawn guy?
01:14:46.000 Yeah, he wanted to...
01:14:48.000 We gotta get Michael Jai White in here, man.
01:14:50.000 Let's do it.
01:14:51.000 Yeah, I think I have his number, but let me check it with you.
01:14:54.000 Make sure it's the same one.
01:14:55.000 I ran into him at a pool hall recently.
01:14:57.000 Yeah, he'd be great on the show.
01:14:58.000 I love that dude.
01:14:58.000 And he was Spawn, if you don't know who that was, that movie.
01:15:01.000 He played Spawn, which is a fucking badass movie.
01:15:05.000 But those Spawn comic books are a perfect example.
01:15:08.000 That's just so outside the box in comparison to the shit that was around just in the 1950s and the 1960s.
01:15:15.000 The really dark storylines and insane artwork.
01:15:20.000 That guy did some wild shit.
01:15:24.000 And then it just went away.
01:15:25.000 Whatever happened to that dude?
01:15:26.000 Aww.
01:15:28.000 You're so sensitive.
01:15:29.000 I love it.
01:15:30.000 She's going to get sensitive.
01:15:31.000 Well, I'm sure the guy's rich as fuck.
01:15:32.000 I mean, I think if he's gone away, it's on purpose.
01:15:35.000 You know, I don't think it's at all.
01:15:37.000 That's cool.
01:15:37.000 Yeah.
01:15:38.000 Do you know who I'm talking about?
01:15:38.000 The guy who made Spawn?
01:15:39.000 Did you ever see the Spawn comic books?
01:15:41.000 Todd McFarlane.
01:15:42.000 See, it's all before your time.
01:15:43.000 No, I know.
01:15:44.000 Do you read comics?
01:15:47.000 I like Terry and the Pirates.
01:15:49.000 You're in Tony Hawk's video game, aren't you?
01:15:51.000 You guys have an unlockable character that Tony Hawk rides.
01:15:53.000 Yeah!
01:15:53.000 And they gave me an ass, because I don't have an ass.
01:15:55.000 I remember they sent me the CGI, whatever thing, because you go in and they do the little scan thing or whatever.
01:16:02.000 And I remember going, like, whoa!
01:16:03.000 You guys gave me, like, a badonkadon.
01:16:05.000 That's good.
01:16:05.000 I usually played as your character, because I like playing girl characters for some reason.
01:16:09.000 Yeah, they gave me, like, my wristband, my hair is all red.
01:16:11.000 Like, it's cool.
01:16:12.000 You played me?
01:16:13.000 That's awesome!
01:16:14.000 Yeah, they had that skateboard where you stepped on.
01:16:16.000 I didn't know.
01:16:17.000 It wasn't my favorite Tony Hawk game, but that was cool, seeing you in that.
01:16:20.000 Oh, man, that's awesome.
01:16:22.000 There's a weird emotional connection when you tattoo someone.
01:16:26.000 You are on them for life.
01:16:29.000 I know for Eddie, that thing is very important to him.
01:16:33.000 He's talked about it.
01:16:33.000 He tears up when he talks about his grandmother.
01:16:36.000 What is that like for you to have all these people running around there that you have this intense emotional connection with something that you've created on their body?
01:16:45.000 Oh man, it's awesome.
01:16:47.000 I remember one time I was driving to work and this guy was crossing the street and he was really, really tall and I remember he looked like a businessman with a button-up shirt and he was just walking across the street with curly hair and I was staring at him like, I wonder what that guy's deal is.
01:17:01.000 You know what I mean?
01:17:02.000 What does he do?
01:17:03.000 And I could totally draw him.
01:17:04.000 He had all his interesting facial features.
01:17:06.000 And then I go in to tattoo that day and he was my appointment.
01:17:10.000 And I tattooed him and it was the most intense story of like living in fear and regret and just making closure with all these, with death, which is I think one of the harder subjects I think for people.
01:17:24.000 And then I remember being done with it and driving back home and seeing him cross the street again to go to wherever his car was parked.
01:17:32.000 And I was like, oh, it's like every person could be that guy.
01:17:36.000 I just always think about that.
01:17:38.000 Especially people who piss me off or annoy me or whatever.
01:17:41.000 I'm always like, you just don't know.
01:17:43.000 So it's a cool connection, I think.
01:17:45.000 You might be the crazy link to the other dimension.
01:17:48.000 It might be you.
01:17:49.000 It might have been your magic that you used on Eddie there.
01:17:52.000 That's ridiculous.
01:17:52.000 You're connected to another synchronicity like that?
01:17:55.000 Yeah, all the time.
01:17:57.000 That's so bizarre.
01:17:59.000 You tattooed...
01:18:00.000 You got to talk into the mic, bro.
01:18:01.000 You covered a tattoo once.
01:18:03.000 You talked about this before in a different interview where you covered a tattoo of a dude on his dick, right?
01:18:09.000 What?
01:18:10.000 Cover a dick tattoo.
01:18:11.000 It's just so funny because I think when the...
01:18:13.000 It's true.
01:18:14.000 When it first got on TV, they always ask you the first elementary questions.
01:18:19.000 It's like, what was your first tattoo?
01:18:20.000 What's the weirdest tattoo?
01:18:21.000 And they're always like...
01:18:23.000 Pussy foot around like that question like so have you ever tattooed you know like a weird area?
01:18:29.000 I'm just like just say it you know.
01:18:30.000 Butthole?
01:18:31.000 Have you done a butthole?
01:18:32.000 That's very recent.
01:18:33.000 The girls are starting to do the butthole tattoos.
01:18:35.000 No that's awful.
01:18:39.000 That's awful?
01:18:40.000 Yeah I mean that's like sacred ground.
01:18:42.000 No it's physically you know take all the funny stuff out it's like physically a very unhealthy thing to do like the amount of toxins and whatever.
01:18:50.000 But anyways.
01:18:50.000 Baby wipe.
01:18:51.000 Oh, so the actual, the more sensitive tissue.
01:18:54.000 It'd probably give you hemorrhoids immediately, I would imagine.
01:18:57.000 You're going to have problems, dude.
01:19:00.000 And then, you know, that area's really hard to keep clean for some reason.
01:19:05.000 You know, I would have to go with the Dr. Drew one on this one.
01:19:08.000 Yeah, I would think Dr. Drew might be right about asshole doctors.
01:19:15.000 Listen out there, you crazy bitches.
01:19:17.000 If Kat Von D is disgusting with asshole tattoos, do not get an asshole tattoo.
01:19:22.000 That's just attention-seeking and there's no art aspect behind that.
01:19:25.000 Well, maybe it's a beautiful job.
01:19:27.000 Maybe it's like some roses in the center of them are all scrunchy and shit.
01:19:30.000 And maybe it's just done to be like the most amazing rose.
01:19:33.000 Like your asshole looks like a rose.
01:19:35.000 Now for the cock one, did you have to have it hard the whole time when you're tattooing it?
01:19:39.000 You know what I mean?
01:19:39.000 When you talk to a woman, you shouldn't make that jerk off in your face when you're saying hard.
01:19:44.000 You were actually doing that.
01:19:47.000 I can explain the situation because it sounds so much more perverted than it was.
01:19:51.000 There's a guy who had been through some times and had gotten a lot of ghetto...
01:19:58.000 Gang tattoos and stuff and all homemade guitar string tattoo collection he had.
01:20:05.000 And so we went through over the years and redid all of them.
01:20:08.000 He had all these brand new tattoos, some of them covered and improved or whatever.
01:20:12.000 And then I remember I become friends with all my clients because you spend such intimate times.
01:20:19.000 It's like three hours of intense...
01:20:21.000 We're not talking about Butthole tattoos.
01:20:25.000 We're talking about life and death and stuff.
01:20:28.000 Or whatever we talk about.
01:20:31.000 I'm always so heavy.
01:20:32.000 I hate that.
01:20:33.000 But he was cool.
01:20:36.000 And then he came to me very respectfully with his wife.
01:20:38.000 And was like, you know, I have this one tattoo.
01:20:40.000 And now that I'm remarried and stuff, I'm no longer with Linda.
01:20:45.000 I understand if you don't want to do it, it's fine.
01:20:47.000 But it kind of bothers a new wife.
01:20:50.000 So it was a name on the deck.
01:20:52.000 The word Linda.
01:20:53.000 Yeah, the name Linda.
01:20:54.000 Damn, Linda won.
01:20:55.000 Whoever Linda is, she won.
01:20:57.000 Most of the time, it just said LA.
01:20:58.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:21:01.000 What did you change it to?
01:21:03.000 No, so he comes, I'm like, yeah, man, it's cool, you know, and so he comes with his wife.
01:21:08.000 No, he comes with his wife.
01:21:10.000 And so I was like, yeah, you know, like, I'll put up, like, The partitioners, you know, that you see at the hospital and stuff so that others can't watch or whatever.
01:21:18.000 And no, you don't get an erection during that time.
01:21:21.000 I don't think you...
01:21:22.000 Unless you're...
01:21:22.000 You have to spread it out like a butterfly, though?
01:21:24.000 Like when you're dissecting a butterfly?
01:21:25.000 No, so I had him lay down and then he whips this...
01:21:28.000 Tremendous thing?
01:21:29.000 It's so crazy like it was like l y n d a apostrophe s it was like hours and hours oh apostrophe s linda's yeah hours and hours of tattooing i was just basically saying it was quite a large tattoo it was a large penis you took your time on it as well just to clarify the penis and the tattoo were both large i mean it would be like you talking to an ob-gyn about you know a 8 inches?
01:21:56.000 To you.
01:21:57.000 To you, it might have been like talking to an OBGYN. To a dude who's got a girl touching his penis even under such inauspicious circumstances as covering over.
01:22:06.000 Please, whatever.
01:22:07.000 And it's not that way.
01:22:09.000 I mean, it's like...
01:22:09.000 Oh, that's so silly.
01:22:10.000 It's always that way.
01:22:11.000 No, it's not.
01:22:11.000 There's not 90% of it.
01:22:13.000 Maybe only 10% that way.
01:22:14.000 But 10% is that way.
01:22:16.000 That probably got him through.
01:22:16.000 So when you go to your doctor and he touches your wee-wee...
01:22:19.000 20%.
01:22:19.000 My doctor doesn't look like you.
01:22:21.000 What?
01:22:23.000 If my doctor looked like you and touched my penis, I'm sure I'd have a problem.
01:22:26.000 I might have to beat off before I got to the office.
01:22:29.000 Stop it.
01:22:30.000 You guys are awful.
01:22:30.000 That's what dudes do.
01:22:31.000 I wouldn't want to think that way.
01:22:33.000 Not every dude does that.
01:22:33.000 Oh my god, you're so crazy.
01:22:35.000 90%.
01:22:35.000 Why don't you go online and look up doctor porn.
01:22:39.000 Like the female doctors who make out with the men and have sex with them.
01:22:43.000 I know what you need.
01:22:44.000 You don't need medicine.
01:22:45.000 You need sugar.
01:22:46.000 Oh my god, that's so sad.
01:22:47.000 No, no, no.
01:22:48.000 No, it's not sad.
01:22:49.000 It's just reality.
01:22:50.000 There's nothing wrong with that.
01:22:51.000 Well, reality is very sad.
01:22:52.000 Well, it's not sad.
01:22:53.000 Dudes would be massively attracted to this idea that a beautiful doctor is going to get intimate with them.
01:23:00.000 I'm not going to get into it.
01:23:01.000 But even just touching their intimate parts in some sort of a doctor sort of a thing.
01:23:06.000 Like, so what's wrong with your penis, Johnny?
01:23:08.000 Sorry I brought this up.
01:23:09.000 I apologize.
01:23:10.000 Don't be mad at me, please.
01:23:11.000 All I'm saying is, you're a beautiful woman.
01:23:16.000 And if you were a doctor, a certain amount of your patients would most certainly love it if you examined their penis.
01:23:22.000 You know what?
01:23:23.000 I don't think it's that way so much anymore.
01:23:25.000 Mind you, I did that tattoo when I was like, you know, I don't know, like 19 or 20. When you were even hotter.
01:23:32.000 Oh, thanks.
01:23:32.000 What the fuck is that?
01:23:34.000 Everybody's retarded today.
01:23:36.000 Jesus Christ, Eddie Bravo.
01:23:38.000 That doesn't help your point.
01:23:39.000 That doesn't help your point.
01:23:40.000 How dare you.
01:23:41.000 It was when I was 17. That makes it better.
01:23:45.000 No, I was like drunk back then and I was totally out of shape versus now.
01:23:48.000 Yeah, what you're saying is, you're saying she looks worse.
01:23:51.000 No, I wasn't saying that.
01:23:54.000 You can never say that to a girl.
01:23:55.000 I wasn't saying that.
01:23:56.000 I apologize.
01:23:58.000 So what did you turn it into?
01:23:59.000 I was trying to be funny.
01:23:59.000 At the time, he just wanted to get...
01:24:02.000 It said Linda's?
01:24:03.000 Did it say apostrophe S? Like Linda's dick?
01:24:05.000 Wow.
01:24:07.000 This is Linda's.
01:24:08.000 Not anymore.
01:24:09.000 I wonder if Linda's still alive.
01:24:10.000 Fuck yeah, she's alive.
01:24:12.000 She took Griselda Blanco's place in Colombia.
01:24:15.000 Linda's down there running shit, capping motherfuckers, and driving around on a 10-speed.
01:24:19.000 So what did you turn it into?
01:24:20.000 I think it was just like some tribal design or something back then.
01:24:25.000 A tribal?
01:24:25.000 But I mean, it was like, you don't have that much work.
01:24:27.000 That's my Maori dick.
01:24:29.000 You guys, stop.
01:24:30.000 Sorry.
01:24:31.000 She did some biomech on that shit.
01:24:32.000 It's crazy.
01:24:33.000 All my like...
01:24:34.000 All my work goes down to this tattoo.
01:24:36.000 Some Geiger shit.
01:24:38.000 I want to get Tower 7 on my dick.
01:24:40.000 No, we're not listening.
01:24:41.000 We're definitely not saying that all you work.
01:24:42.000 You should have just did the portrait of his new wife on top of that shit.
01:24:47.000 With a chainsaw cutting Linda up.
01:24:50.000 Like a chainsaw hitting Linda and blood splattering all over.
01:24:53.000 So it's not Linda's.
01:24:55.000 Fuck that bitch.
01:24:56.000 Why didn't he opt to get the laser on the penis?
01:24:58.000 I don't know.
01:24:59.000 You know, I don't know.
01:25:00.000 Back then, I don't think it was as...
01:25:01.000 Stop.
01:25:03.000 Stop.
01:25:05.000 I'm like scanning my brain for any other tattoo reference I could jump to.
01:25:09.000 What's worse, a burning laser or needles?
01:25:11.000 Are you like, did you have to like pull on it and flatten it?
01:25:15.000 No.
01:25:15.000 Like how did you want it?
01:25:16.000 Like a butterfly.
01:25:17.000 Yeah.
01:25:18.000 Or a frog.
01:25:19.000 No, no, no.
01:25:19.000 I mean like if somebody was sitting, like if he was sitting here then I would get dental bibs around all of it and then I would just, oh god this is awful.
01:25:28.000 No it's not.
01:25:29.000 No, there's no, there's not, in no way is it sexual.
01:25:33.000 Of course.
01:25:34.000 For sure.
01:25:35.000 We're not saying that.
01:25:36.000 We're not saying you got off.
01:25:37.000 Did you spit on it before you started?
01:25:38.000 Oh my god.
01:25:39.000 The approach.
01:25:40.000 The middle of it.
01:25:42.000 We're just saying.
01:25:42.000 We're just saying.
01:25:43.000 Fuck, man.
01:25:44.000 You guys.
01:25:45.000 It is a very extraordinary tattoo.
01:25:47.000 Did you guys just take your knuckles and do that thing that you guys do?
01:25:49.000 I had to give him knuckles for that one.
01:25:51.000 What did he say?
01:25:51.000 He just said, did you spit on it?
01:25:54.000 Oh.
01:25:54.000 Come on, man.
01:25:55.000 That's hilarious.
01:25:56.000 In the moment, it was just perfect.
01:25:58.000 That's like one of those Daniel Tosh moments.
01:25:59.000 I'm sorry.
01:26:00.000 In the moment, it was perfect.
01:26:01.000 He's ridiculous.
01:26:03.000 Yeah, look, it certainly was not sexual.
01:26:05.000 I mean, it has to be insanely painful.
01:26:07.000 You'd have to be, like, a really sick, but then there's a lot of sick fucks who are, like, really into pain, right?
01:26:12.000 No, I think he was more embarrassed than anything, and he was really, again, like, his wife was there, and it was a very, you know, I think he was almost...
01:26:18.000 I don't know.
01:26:19.000 I would have made sure about him to have sex right before, just in case.
01:26:22.000 Do you think that's Linda's go-to shit, that Linda just, you gotta tattoo my name on your dick.
01:26:28.000 That's the only way this gonna work.
01:26:30.000 LAUGHTER She's got a headboard with notches and how many dudes have tattooed her name on their dick.
01:26:38.000 What a gangster chick that chick must be.
01:26:41.000 Maybe it was his idea.
01:26:42.000 To get her back.
01:26:44.000 Doubt it, doubt it, doubt it.
01:26:45.000 We need to know the story.
01:26:46.000 Do you see our number?
01:26:46.000 You guys are still friends, right?
01:26:48.000 No, don't call that dude up.
01:26:50.000 I'll email him.
01:26:54.000 Hello, you don't know me, but...
01:26:56.000 But I know about your dick.
01:26:58.000 Just curious.
01:27:00.000 And you don't have to answer.
01:27:01.000 Have you ever been in the middle of tattooing someone and for whatever reason you just told them to get the fuck out of there like I can't do you, you're giving me bad energy, you're annoying, you're crying too much, you're...
01:27:12.000 Have you ever had to stop a tattoo?
01:27:16.000 Um...
01:27:16.000 Probably because of stench a couple times, right?
01:27:19.000 No, no.
01:27:19.000 B.O. or anything?
01:27:20.000 No.
01:27:20.000 You're like, damn!
01:27:22.000 Bad wiper.
01:27:23.000 You guys are awful.
01:27:24.000 You do have to stop.
01:27:27.000 No, I don't know.
01:27:28.000 Let's see.
01:27:29.000 There was one tattoo that...
01:27:31.000 Ah, fuck.
01:27:31.000 These don't sound like interesting stories to me, but they probably are.
01:27:35.000 Um...
01:27:37.000 Oh, yeah.
01:27:39.000 Twice, there's two different people that, like, their wife went into labor during their tattoo.
01:27:48.000 One of them was...
01:27:48.000 It's probably because they knew, the wife knew, that you were tattooing the husband.
01:27:52.000 No, it was so awesome.
01:27:54.000 Like, one of them, I remember, was, like, Mira Sorvino's...
01:27:57.000 Superhot tattooed chick all around.
01:27:58.000 What's my husband doing?
01:28:00.000 No, this is a great story because it was very sweet, actually.
01:28:04.000 It was Mira Sorvino's husband, and he was getting a pinup girl version of her tattooed on his leg.
01:28:12.000 And then halfway through, he got the phone call.
01:28:14.000 And we're like, ah, we'll just finish it another day.
01:28:16.000 And that's sweet.
01:28:16.000 I thought that was nice.
01:28:17.000 Oh, that is sweet.
01:28:18.000 For sure.
01:28:18.000 Yeah.
01:28:19.000 It's not that interesting.
01:28:20.000 Has anybody ever come to you with some, like, crazy demonic shit and you're like, I just don't want to get into this?
01:28:25.000 I mean, I don't do any tattoos that really go against any of, like, my moral...
01:28:28.000 I mean, you know, the crazy thing is nowadays it's so different than when it used to be.
01:28:32.000 Like, I used to...
01:28:34.000 I just tattoo a lot of...
01:28:36.000 The people who are getting tattooed by me now are just more serious collectors, so I'm not really dealing with a lot of riffraff or weirdness.
01:28:43.000 But in the past, I'm digging deep into the past right now.
01:28:46.000 So yeah, I mean, sometimes people would come in and wanting to get...
01:28:52.000 Tattoos that I don't necessarily agree with.
01:28:54.000 I don't need the money, so I don't need to tattoo you if I don't feel good about it.
01:28:59.000 If it's something creepy.
01:29:00.000 Yeah, even though it is my gift to the person, it's also a collaborative experience, so I have to feel good about it.
01:29:05.000 It also goes for things that I don't think I'm good at.
01:29:08.000 There's certain things that I'm just not good at.
01:29:11.000 I would bet that you would be really good if you wanted to do some Paul Booth type shit.
01:29:16.000 Oh, I like all the evil stuff.
01:29:18.000 Heavy, evil shit.
01:29:19.000 I like stuff like that.
01:29:20.000 You do that kind of stuff?
01:29:21.000 Yeah, I like all kinds of art.
01:29:24.000 I think some of the creepiest stuff is a lot of the old Catholic artwork.
01:29:28.000 The reason that it's so striking and it affects and moves people is because it's very...
01:29:36.000 It gives you fear.
01:29:37.000 It's amazing.
01:29:38.000 It's powerful.
01:29:38.000 So I love that stuff.
01:29:40.000 I wear a lot of crosses and stuff and it may not be for the meanings that most people assume it would be.
01:29:45.000 I just like what crosses look like.
01:29:47.000 A friend of mine went to Italy and while he was there he took a photo of the ceiling of some religious place.
01:29:54.000 That the outside edge of the photo, the center is heaven.
01:29:58.000 Yeah, and it looks like you're in a grave.
01:29:59.000 And the outside edge is all these demons.
01:30:02.000 And they're shoving, like, pitchforks up dudes' asses.
01:30:06.000 It's crazy back then.
01:30:07.000 I'm like, it's really intense.
01:30:08.000 If you look at, like, all the Hieronymus Bosch stuff.
01:30:10.000 I mean, that stuff's, like, I think painted in the 1500s, 1600s.
01:30:13.000 Isn't, like, the Danish, I think he was?
01:30:17.000 I mean, that shit was so ahead of its time.
01:30:19.000 Oh, yeah.
01:30:20.000 It's crazy.
01:30:20.000 Crazy, scary.
01:30:21.000 So weird.
01:30:21.000 And back then, I mean, they really believed that, too.
01:30:24.000 I mean, when you were drawing those paintings of the demons skewering dudes in their assholes, like, people really thought that that was going to happen to you if you died and you went to hell.
01:30:33.000 Well, I think Caravaggio is one of my favorites, you know, from that era.
01:30:37.000 I think he was one of the first more influential painters of the time that started doing renditions of biblical stories and stuff, but painting like Jesus and painting Jesus more in like a very human-like fashion, so it was even more real.
01:30:54.000 Do you know what I mean?
01:30:55.000 It wasn't like this, you know, golden aura and rays and wings and all that stuff.
01:31:00.000 He made him look like you and I, and so you would see, like, crucifixion pieces and stuff that, I mean, you feel it.
01:31:07.000 It's like...
01:31:08.000 It's fucked up when you look at, like, all the old crucifixion images.
01:31:12.000 Crucifixions are crazy just to begin with, straight up.
01:31:14.000 It's a crazy way to kill somebody.
01:31:16.000 I mean, you just nail them to them.
01:31:17.000 Yeah, it's nuts.
01:31:18.000 I mean, but in the old pictures, he was always, like, in pretty good shape, except for the holes in his arms.
01:31:25.000 I mean, he wasn't all fucked up.
01:31:27.000 He was 7% body fat.
01:31:29.000 That's not what I meant.
01:31:30.000 What I meant was he was okay.
01:31:31.000 He wasn't all fucked up, like the Mel Gibson movie.
01:31:35.000 But, like, the interpretation of it now...
01:31:37.000 It's like, if you go to see that Mel Gibson movie, that's our version of what would have happened when he...
01:31:41.000 I mean, that was horrific.
01:31:43.000 I mean, that was really scary shit.
01:31:44.000 Like, the beatings that they did to him, and they had to have that fake body that was, like, bleeding on all these different areas.
01:31:52.000 I mean, it was like a fake robot Jesus.
01:31:53.000 Oh, you think about all, like, the medieval torture devices that have been made.
01:31:55.000 I mean, it's crazy.
01:31:56.000 It's crazy that people even invented or thought of things.
01:31:59.000 Yeah, the racks.
01:32:00.000 Iron Maiden and all that.
01:32:01.000 Horrifying shit.
01:32:03.000 Cat piano.
01:32:03.000 Have you ever seen that?
01:32:04.000 What is that?
01:32:04.000 The pictures of the cat piano they used to have.
01:32:06.000 This was only like a hundred years ago.
01:32:08.000 No, what is it?
01:32:08.000 Where they had a bunch of cats lined up and had these things that would poke the cat and make them meow, and you played the piano.
01:32:14.000 Oh, it's so sad.
01:32:15.000 It was a cat piano.
01:32:17.000 Well, yeah.
01:32:18.000 They didn't give a fuck about cats back then.
01:32:20.000 The mortality rate for people.
01:32:22.000 I do too.
01:32:23.000 I'd love my cat more if she would stop peeing in my fucking house.
01:32:25.000 How many cats do you have?
01:32:26.000 Dirty little bitch.
01:32:27.000 I only have one.
01:32:27.000 I'm not a crazy cat lady.
01:32:29.000 I just love my cat.
01:32:30.000 Do you want another one?
01:32:32.000 Is it hairless?
01:32:33.000 Because I have a hairless cat and they get kind of...
01:32:35.000 It's the opposite.
01:32:36.000 He's got full hair.
01:32:37.000 Because your cat would just kick his cat's ass all the time.
01:32:40.000 His cat's a fluff ball.
01:32:41.000 Aw, that's cute.
01:32:42.000 I can't stop my cat from peeing in my fucking house.
01:32:45.000 She just likes to not pee where the litter box is.
01:32:47.000 This must be the most boring interview for you guys, like, talking about...
01:32:51.000 Why?
01:32:51.000 Well, I don't know.
01:32:52.000 No, we always go there.
01:32:53.000 What do you guys talk about?
01:32:54.000 If I wasn't here, what would you be talking about?
01:32:56.000 We might be talking about this.
01:32:57.000 Seriously.
01:32:58.000 No, it's not boring to us.
01:32:59.000 You're not boring at all.
01:33:00.000 Don't even say that.
01:33:00.000 That's not what it is.
01:33:01.000 There's a cat clock right there.
01:33:02.000 We talk about anything and everything.
01:33:04.000 There's a cat clock.
01:33:05.000 Yeah, the fucking thing goes off every hour at meows.
01:33:07.000 Yeah, it ruins the podcast.
01:33:08.000 In ten minutes, you're going to hear meow, meow, and you're going to go, what the fuck?
01:33:11.000 There's cats all over the desk.
01:33:13.000 Clearly, the guy's obsessed with cats.
01:33:14.000 Oh, yeah, you have a cat t-shirt.
01:33:15.000 There's something wrong with him.
01:33:16.000 I don't know what it is.
01:33:17.000 I just like the lucky cat.
01:33:18.000 I don't know what the fuck's wrong with him, but he's okay.
01:33:20.000 Do you ever do lucky cat tattoos?
01:33:21.000 I've done one, yeah, before.
01:33:23.000 A couple times back in the day.
01:33:25.000 Yeah.
01:33:25.000 That's cool.
01:33:26.000 When did you first start off practicing on?
01:33:29.000 Did you use pig skin?
01:33:30.000 No, I just tattooed people.
01:33:31.000 See, I was underage, so I had a plethora of friends that were underage and couldn't get tattoos, so they were just...
01:33:40.000 Oh wow, so you tattooed them?
01:33:41.000 Where'd you get the needles?
01:33:43.000 Well, at the time I had a friend that believed in me and who worked at a shop.
01:33:46.000 I mean, you know, this was in the ghetto in San Bernardino, so it's like things were a lot different than they are now.
01:33:52.000 And so like my first shop that I worked at, I remember it was called Sin City Tattoo at the time.
01:33:56.000 It was like on Highland and East Street, which was like such a really gnarly part out there.
01:34:01.000 I don't know if it's cleaned up, but I know there's a jail right down the street.
01:34:04.000 That's never good.
01:34:05.000 Yeah, there's people getting robbed all the time except us because I think we were tattooing all the thieves and stuff.
01:34:11.000 And back then, the wars between tattoo shops were so different and it was all bikers.
01:34:15.000 My boss, come to think of it, probably wasn't even his real name.
01:34:22.000 He was gnarly, I mean...
01:34:23.000 There was wars between tattoo shops?
01:34:25.000 Oh yeah, like if you opened up a shop in a mile radius, you would get...
01:34:29.000 I mean, I remember we'd get shot at...
01:34:31.000 What is it called?
01:34:33.000 Something cocktails with the fire and you try...
01:34:34.000 Molotov cocktail?
01:34:35.000 Yeah, we'd get those through the windows.
01:34:37.000 Really?
01:34:37.000 Oh yeah, it was crazy.
01:34:39.000 It's just, it was rough.
01:34:40.000 While you guys were working, this would happen?
01:34:42.000 All the time.
01:34:43.000 I mean, I think my first, yeah, I mean, it was pretty brutal.
01:34:45.000 There's reasons for my, I feel bad for my parents because they're like, oh my God, they had to like imagine all the things.
01:34:50.000 Wow.
01:34:51.000 And I was 16 when I first got into that shop and I remember going, hey man, I'm underage.
01:34:54.000 And he's like, he looked at my shitty portfolio of Polaroids that were blurry and crappy and he was like, eh.
01:35:00.000 And then I showed him my drawings and he goes, oh, okay, yeah, you could do it.
01:35:04.000 And I remember he used to say, you're going to fly far, far away.
01:35:07.000 I'm like, no, I'm going to stay here forever.
01:35:10.000 Like, see you later, San Bernardino.
01:35:12.000 Wow.
01:35:13.000 You sold them down the river?
01:35:14.000 No, no, no.
01:35:14.000 It was such a rough place for a 16-year-old girl to be at.
01:35:23.000 San Bernardino's rough for your 60s.
01:35:25.000 Yeah, totally.
01:35:25.000 It's rough for everybody.
01:35:27.000 That's a tricky area.
01:35:28.000 Yeah, and I lived right down the street with a prostitute at the time.
01:35:31.000 It was rough, you know?
01:35:32.000 I mean, it was awful.
01:35:34.000 Were you buddies?
01:35:35.000 Yeah.
01:35:35.000 No, no.
01:35:36.000 I met her because I had been working at a movie theater before that, passing out popcorn.
01:35:39.000 And, like, she worked there, and I needed a place to stay next to the shop.
01:35:43.000 And so I would pretty much take care of her kids while she would go in and out of her drug comatose.
01:35:49.000 It was sad.
01:35:49.000 It was very sad.
01:35:50.000 Wow.
01:35:51.000 Really hard.
01:35:52.000 But I just knew that if I could be close to the shop, I could tattoo every day and practice.
01:35:56.000 And I would literally go in and open the shop and stay till midnight.
01:36:00.000 Like, you know, it was like 11 to midnight every day.
01:36:02.000 I tattooed so much back then.
01:36:03.000 How long did it take before you were comfortable with the medium of skin, of like moving it around, pulling it to manipulate it?
01:36:09.000 Tattooing?
01:36:09.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:36:10.000 Oh, I was comfortable from the beginning, but that was because when I was tattooing unprofessionally outside of a shop, I didn't know what I was doing, so there was no bar to...
01:36:18.000 I was like, oh, cool, you want to get a misfit skull?
01:36:21.000 That's awesome!
01:36:21.000 And I would just tattoo it, and it'd be like, yeah, it was like eight hours later.
01:36:26.000 But then once I got to my first shop, I had to unlearn a lot of things, and I was like, what?
01:36:30.000 There's more than one kind of tattoo machine and different needles, and...
01:36:33.000 The cleanliness and the sterility aspect of it, all the important stuff.
01:36:37.000 And so I'm just relearning it.
01:36:38.000 But looking back, you know, it was actually awesome that I was brought up in that ghetto upbringing because it definitely is the reason why I tattoo the style that I do because, you know, gangsters get cool tattoos.
01:36:51.000 They all get all the fine line black and gray stuff and I do a lot of names and memory ofs and all that stuff and old English lettering and lots of heinas and gestures and all this shit.
01:37:01.000 I wanted to be a comic book artist when I was a kid.
01:37:04.000 You did?
01:37:04.000 Yeah, I drew a lot of different wild shit.
01:37:09.000 Really?
01:37:09.000 One of the things that I did is I drew on my friends.
01:37:12.000 I would just draw on them.
01:37:14.000 Like I would draw fake tattoos on them.
01:37:15.000 Like really intense, detailed fake tattoos that would take like hours.
01:37:19.000 And I did that because I was thinking about getting a tattoo for a while.
01:37:22.000 Do you still draw?
01:37:22.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
01:37:23.000 I still draw all the time.
01:37:24.000 I want to see it.
01:37:24.000 Yeah, I'll send you some shit.
01:37:26.000 But my best stuff was when I did it every day, and that's when I was in high school.
01:37:30.000 But I had one cunty teacher in high school as an art teacher.
01:37:33.000 It was just so negative.
01:37:34.000 I didn't want to have anything to do with art anymore.
01:37:36.000 I was like, this guy's just a downer.
01:37:38.000 He just was always negative.
01:37:39.000 I failed my art classes in school.
01:37:42.000 But a lot of it's just because I was too punk rock to follow instructions.
01:37:44.000 But it's like I just...
01:37:45.000 I want to draw things the way they are.
01:37:47.000 I mean, yeah, let's learn about the history of fucking cubism or whatever the fuck.
01:37:51.000 But when it comes to drawing stuff, I don't want to do two-point perspective.
01:37:54.000 I just want to do it as it is.
01:37:56.000 And I'd rather draw this stapler as it is versus...
01:37:59.000 You want to do what you want to do.
01:38:01.000 Yeah, you can't teach technique.
01:38:05.000 But anyways, I would fail all these classes.
01:38:09.000 And I'm like, I don't need this shit.
01:38:10.000 Yeah, it's like you have an idea that you want to get out.
01:38:14.000 You have your expression that you want to get out.
01:38:16.000 And the problem is when someone says, no, I don't want you to get that out.
01:38:19.000 I want you to work on that.
01:38:20.000 It's like you have these brief moments where these doors are open, where this creativity wants to run through.
01:38:26.000 And when you're sitting there, I mean, in one sense, it's good to be disciplined, and it's good to be regimented, and it's good to have good fundamentals.
01:38:31.000 But it's also good to just let it go when you want to let it go.
01:38:34.000 Like you could learn all those things in your own time as far as And I think there are...
01:38:39.000 Granted, I think there are some good art teachers out there, but I think that would be such a tricky thing to do because it's such a personal thing, too, you know?
01:38:45.000 So it would require a person that was...
01:38:47.000 Well, you know, Doug Stanhope and I, we've talked about teaching comedy classes that you could never...
01:38:53.000 First of all, you could never charge.
01:38:54.000 Like, there's a lot of people that have, like, these comedy classes where, you know, they charge this ridiculous amount of money, you go through all this crazy bullshit with them, and they pretend to turn you into a comedian.
01:39:02.000 And we're like, it should be free, you can't charge...
01:39:05.000 And you really can't give them any fucking advice because there's almost nothing you can tell them.
01:39:09.000 I mean, that should be what the comedy class is.
01:39:10.000 You know what?
01:39:11.000 One of the last comedy shows I came to was right here.
01:39:13.000 Oh, really?
01:39:14.000 Yeah.
01:39:14.000 We're here all the time.
01:39:15.000 As a matter of fact, we're here Wednesday night.
01:39:17.000 There's Joey Diaz, Brian Callan, Duncan Trussell, and me.
01:39:21.000 Awesome.
01:39:21.000 And maybe Brian, if he can come on, sweetie.
01:39:25.000 It's a long story.
01:39:26.000 Deep story.
01:39:26.000 Okay.
01:39:27.000 We won't go into that.
01:39:28.000 But, yeah, it's an awesome place.
01:39:31.000 The Ice House Comedy Club has been around forever.
01:39:33.000 It's been 1961, I think, is when it first was opened.
01:39:38.000 Yeah, it's like 50 years.
01:39:40.000 I did my first set here in 94. Really?
01:39:42.000 Yeah, when I first moved here from New York.
01:39:44.000 Comedy's hard, man.
01:39:46.000 There's a whole thing to it.
01:39:48.000 It is and it isn't.
01:39:48.000 Well, I mean, I just think it's not anybody could just go up there and tell a story.
01:39:53.000 I mean, some people are really good storytellers, but I think there's a whole thing to it.
01:39:57.000 Well, you know how for you, when you sit down and you draw, it's like you know you know how to fucking draw.
01:40:04.000 You've been doing it forever.
01:40:05.000 But if you hadn't ever done it before, practiced it before, really, Forced your hand to move in the way that you want it to in order to create this image.
01:40:12.000 It'd be almost alien, almost impossible.
01:40:14.000 For a lot of people, they look at the artwork that you do and it's almost incomprehensible.
01:40:18.000 To wrap their head around how someone could recreate something like that.
01:40:21.000 How can you do that?
01:40:22.000 How can you do that?
01:40:23.000 It's the same thing with comedy.
01:40:24.000 You do it enough times.
01:40:25.000 Or jujitsu.
01:40:26.000 Or music.
01:40:27.000 You do it enough times.
01:40:28.000 And it just becomes you.
01:40:30.000 It becomes you.
01:40:31.000 But yeah, it's hard to get there.
01:40:32.000 But not really.
01:40:33.000 I mean, it is and it isn't.
01:40:35.000 It's like Joey Diaz said it best.
01:40:36.000 He said, comedy is the hardest, easiest thing you'll ever do.
01:40:39.000 Because it's fucking really hard.
01:40:40.000 It's easy if you're good at it.
01:40:41.000 Yeah, to get it to where it's easy.
01:40:43.000 I just can't imagine drawing without an eraser for a tattoo artist.
01:40:47.000 That just seems to me like the scariest thing in the world because I've never drawn something that I didn't erase something on or change or wish I did something different.
01:40:55.000 And is there times when you're tattooing, you're like, shit, I have to now work around this.
01:41:00.000 Well, you also got to think about the time you're putting in as opposed to the time she's putting in.
01:41:04.000 I mean, she's doing like, you know, you're probably tattooing eight, ten hours a day, right?
01:41:07.000 How many hours a day are you doing this?
01:41:08.000 Nowadays?
01:41:09.000 Or were you?
01:41:10.000 Well, when I first started, oh yeah, I mean it was so many hours.
01:41:14.000 I didn't have a day off until my first days off.
01:41:17.000 I started like three or four years ago.
01:41:19.000 I started taking Sundays off.
01:41:21.000 Did you ever have any idea that you could have some sort of reality show type success like this?
01:41:26.000 No, I wouldn't watch TV. I mean, but was there any idea that you could have this kind of success?
01:41:30.000 I mean, did you ever think that...
01:41:31.000 Did you have this in your head?
01:41:33.000 No, I just see, like, things in the...
01:41:35.000 Like, I see things differently.
01:41:37.000 Or, I don't know, I just see things, like...
01:41:40.000 Like, oh, there's an opportunity.
01:41:41.000 Or, oh, that.
01:41:42.000 You can make this out of that.
01:41:43.000 And I think a lot of people maybe just blind themselves to that.
01:41:46.000 So, I don't know.
01:41:47.000 I never wanted that.
01:41:48.000 It's not...
01:41:49.000 I actually was...
01:41:49.000 But it didn't exist before.
01:41:51.000 It didn't exist.
01:41:52.000 Celebrity tattooists didn't exist.
01:41:54.000 I mean, the Ed Hardy type dudes.
01:41:56.000 There was a few names.
01:41:57.000 Yeah, it's not the same.
01:41:58.000 Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
01:41:59.000 Yeah.
01:41:59.000 Of course, I never in a million years imagined this stuff.
01:42:01.000 I mean, if you knew where I was born and where I come from, it's totally different.
01:42:07.000 It's the opposite of this stuff.
01:42:08.000 But I don't know.
01:42:09.000 I'm not that impressed by that stuff.
01:42:12.000 It's cool.
01:42:12.000 It's cool and I'm very appreciative.
01:42:14.000 It's awesome.
01:42:14.000 Like, oh, I get to do more of this stuff.
01:42:17.000 When I talk about it, I'm not saying it in terms of your common perception of how people view success and look at her, she's on TV. It's not that.
01:42:26.000 What I mean is how receptive people are and how much resonance your work is having on people.
01:42:32.000 Never in a million years would I imagine that.
01:42:34.000 I was like the weird girl.
01:42:38.000 Maybe that's why I'm bad at compliments and stuff.
01:42:43.000 I'm just not used to that still.
01:42:46.000 Yeah, that's got to be kind of awkward, right?
01:42:48.000 But it's a really fascinating thing that you've done.
01:42:51.000 But now that I'm not like how he thinks I used to be, I guess it's like...
01:42:55.000 Like what?
01:42:56.000 Oh, that's when you were hotter back then.
01:42:59.000 Oh, see?
01:42:59.000 Dude, I told you.
01:43:00.000 She's still riding on that.
01:43:02.000 We let that joke fly over our heads, but she's still holding on to it, man.
01:43:07.000 That was actually a compliment.
01:43:08.000 It's like a hot lava rock and her arm's burning her soul.
01:43:11.000 I know.
01:43:11.000 No way, no way.
01:43:12.000 By the way, look how beautiful her shoes look today, Joe.
01:43:14.000 Why?
01:43:15.000 Do you like shoes or something?
01:43:16.000 I'm just kidding.
01:43:16.000 I sort of came from Disneyland.
01:43:18.000 Those are pretty cool.
01:43:20.000 There was such a stigma.
01:43:21.000 I'm guilty of it too.
01:43:23.000 Do you like shoes or something?
01:43:24.000 No.
01:43:25.000 I'm not a freak.
01:43:26.000 I love shoes.
01:43:26.000 I'm a normal guy.
01:43:27.000 Usually growing up, you think tattoos, like for me, my uncles had tattoos.
01:43:36.000 I'm sure that influenced me.
01:43:38.000 But, you know, generally girls that got tattoos, they generally weren't hot.
01:43:43.000 Right.
01:43:43.000 Generally.
01:43:44.000 Yeah.
01:43:45.000 And I can imagine...
01:43:49.000 The amount of guys that were thought, like, damn, she's so hot.
01:43:52.000 She's ruining herself with the tattoos or something.
01:43:55.000 And now look at her now.
01:43:56.000 You know what I mean?
01:43:57.000 Most guys wouldn't think that, though.
01:43:59.000 That's an illusion that girls have, I think.
01:44:02.000 You know, most guys.
01:44:03.000 You'd be amazed at how little we give a fuck about, like, a lot of shit that you have.
01:44:06.000 I think it's just more a different generation, that's all.
01:44:09.000 Guys are into body shapes.
01:44:10.000 You change the perception single-handedly, though.
01:44:12.000 Oh yeah, without a doubt, you definitely threw a monkey wrench into the whole idea of what's hot.
01:44:16.000 And there was one movie with...
01:44:18.000 Because you took it deep.
01:44:19.000 There was a movie with Will Ferrell, I think.
01:44:21.000 It wasn't like an extreme comedy.
01:44:23.000 But the love interest, and they never really addressed it in the movie, had a sleeve.
01:44:27.000 You know what I'm talking about?
01:44:28.000 Right.
01:44:28.000 The love interest had a sleeve, and I think it was fake or whatever, but they never talked about it.
01:44:31.000 She was just a chick who worked at a bakery.
01:44:33.000 And Will Ferrell, I think that's what it was, fell in love with her or whatever.
01:44:37.000 That never existed.
01:44:39.000 Man, all the movie offers I've ever gotten are like...
01:44:41.000 Hooker, drug dealer, vampire, what else?
01:44:46.000 Zombie.
01:44:46.000 Random goth chick.
01:44:48.000 Yeah, it's never...
01:44:49.000 Club scene.
01:44:50.000 The cute chick that dates Will Ferrell or whatever.
01:44:52.000 That's funny.
01:44:53.000 Yeah, it's weird how the perception of what tattoos are over the last couple of decades.
01:44:59.000 When I was a kid, no one had sleeves.
01:45:02.000 My friend's dad's never had sleeves.
01:45:05.000 That's weird.
01:45:06.000 But then, you know...
01:45:09.000 Today it's so common.
01:45:10.000 How much more common is our tattoos today than when we were kids?
01:45:16.000 Huge.
01:45:18.000 You gotta talk into the thing, man.
01:45:19.000 You know, Victor, a really good friend of ours has a son.
01:45:23.000 His name is Tori.
01:45:24.000 And Victor has sleeves.
01:45:26.000 He has a lot of tattoos.
01:45:27.000 And his son is 11 or 12 now.
01:45:29.000 And the last time I hung out with him, his son was drawing on himself.
01:45:32.000 For the whole night, he had just marked...
01:45:35.000 He felt really cool because he was like his dad.
01:45:37.000 So that would be...
01:45:38.000 For sure he's going to get tattoos.
01:45:40.000 It just seems like he is.
01:45:41.000 Maybe.
01:45:42.000 Kids are always more open-minded and stuff because they're not tainted by society.
01:45:45.000 But he would get the tattoos because he thought it was cool because his dad...
01:45:49.000 Because him and his dad have an amazing relationship.
01:45:51.000 There's no lack of love in that kid's life.
01:45:54.000 Yeah.
01:45:54.000 From what you know.
01:45:55.000 I'm just kidding.
01:45:56.000 Whoa, no shit.
01:45:57.000 She just hit you with the real son.
01:45:59.000 Damn.
01:45:59.000 It is true though.
01:46:00.000 His dad's awesome.
01:46:01.000 Oh, yeah.
01:46:02.000 Victor's a great...
01:46:02.000 They have a great relationship.
01:46:03.000 He's a sweetheart of a guy.
01:46:04.000 Yeah, that kid probably...
01:46:05.000 Well, it's a weird rite of passage thing too for a young man.
01:46:09.000 It's like when some young kids want to smoke.
01:46:11.000 They're not around their parents.
01:46:13.000 They want to have that cigarette so they can pretend to be an adult.
01:46:15.000 If they have friends that smoke, like older friends or something.
01:46:18.000 Yeah, that.
01:46:19.000 Or if they see their parents do it and they sneak them out and they get them together, you know?
01:46:23.000 That's what I did when I was a kid.
01:46:24.000 We'd sneak out booze.
01:46:25.000 We saw our parents drinking, so I'd find booze in my parents' house and sneak it out into the woods.
01:46:30.000 And we'd do it because we'd pretend to be like adults, you know?
01:46:33.000 It's not really like we wanted to get drunk.
01:46:35.000 We're only at like 11, you know?
01:46:37.000 But we, you know, kids do that.
01:46:41.000 What the hell's wrong with me, man?
01:46:42.000 My parents were so square and like...
01:46:44.000 Sounds like your parents were just super disciplined.
01:46:47.000 Yeah, so where did I get it from?
01:46:48.000 Maybe it's just a reaction to that.
01:46:50.000 The fact that you had to practice all the time and you were very regimented and disciplined and you just became a wild sort of thing because of that.
01:47:00.000 Because of the fact that you were so boxed in by a rigid sort of...
01:47:05.000 But I wasn't wild.
01:47:06.000 I mean, I looked crazy, but I just loved punk rock.
01:47:09.000 It's probably just music, the influence of music, I think it was.
01:47:11.000 I was like, there's more out there.
01:47:14.000 Yeah, if you're totally into punk, you're gonna get some tattoos.
01:47:17.000 Eventually.
01:47:17.000 You're gonna get something.
01:47:18.000 Something.
01:47:19.000 Yeah.
01:47:19.000 If you're really into punk.
01:47:20.000 That black flag thing, you might get that.
01:47:22.000 I just barely got those bars tattoos.
01:47:24.000 Bad boy.
01:47:24.000 Like, this last month.
01:47:25.000 I was like, I can't believe I haven't already had them.
01:47:28.000 The black flag bars?
01:47:28.000 Yeah.
01:47:29.000 Oh, really?
01:47:29.000 You just got them?
01:47:30.000 Oh, that's cool.
01:47:31.000 Yeah.
01:47:32.000 That's nice.
01:47:32.000 And you're like, oh my god, I forgot that one.
01:47:34.000 Shit.
01:47:34.000 No, I was like, how did I not have that already?
01:47:37.000 Do you, I mean, you said you covered up some that were on your left arm.
01:47:41.000 Are you done covering them?
01:47:42.000 Or do you look at your leg?
01:47:43.000 No, I have like a few that like, like one on my leg that I started lasering but it hurts so much.
01:47:47.000 And also I just, again, time consumption.
01:47:49.000 It's harder for me to get tattooed because I'm busy either doing them or doing all the other stuff I do.
01:47:53.000 So it's like, But, yeah, there's a few that I think I would...
01:47:57.000 I mean, just for the sake of making more room or something.
01:48:00.000 Making more room?
01:48:02.000 Isn't that crazy, though?
01:48:03.000 Maybe the Spin Doctors would become popular again.
01:48:06.000 Do you have any bands that are just totally whacked that are tattooed on you?
01:48:09.000 No, I only listen to rad music.
01:48:11.000 But, I mean, at one point in time, you loved them, and now you're like, I can't believe I tattooed those guys on me.
01:48:15.000 I think I've always liked rad music.
01:48:17.000 Always.
01:48:18.000 I've always been cool.
01:48:19.000 You've always had good taste.
01:48:21.000 So, with the ones that you're thinking about lasering off, you just have some ideas and you need some space for it.
01:48:26.000 No, I mean, there's just some that, like, I don't have regrets.
01:48:28.000 Like, I could live with them or without them, you know?
01:48:30.000 But I think, like...
01:48:32.000 I don't know.
01:48:34.000 I haven't had that many boyfriends in my entire life.
01:48:37.000 Cue the violin, Brian.
01:48:40.000 Do you have the violin?
01:48:41.000 No, you've got to be quicker with that, Brian.
01:48:44.000 Yeah, you've got to be ready with that violin, son.
01:48:45.000 That's terrible violin.
01:48:48.000 No, but I've gotten tattoos for...
01:48:51.000 Maybe the Hulk music.
01:48:52.000 The Hulk walkaway music.
01:48:54.000 Oh, that's what it was?
01:48:55.000 Wow, that's a terrible...
01:49:00.000 You know, the end of the show.
01:49:02.000 Sorry.
01:49:02.000 I'm just hearing you guys.
01:49:03.000 I'm sorry.
01:49:04.000 So, you don't have, you haven't had that many boyfriends?
01:49:06.000 Yeah, and I mean, I think I've gotten, like, some tattoos for whatever those relationships in the past.
01:49:11.000 And, like, my first tattoo was a J and whatever, and I still love it.
01:49:14.000 But I think there's, like, two portraits I'd like to get lasered off.
01:49:18.000 It seems like for you, I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like, to me at least, if I had to guess, it's probably very difficult for you to enter into a relationship because you seem to be like one of those all-in sort of girls.
01:49:35.000 Like you fall in love with someone and yeah, all or nothing.
01:49:38.000 So you're ready right away, all in, all or nothing, and then it doesn't work, it's nothing.
01:49:44.000 And then it's like, it's hard to make that, it's hard to pull that trigger.
01:49:48.000 What do you mean?
01:49:49.000 It's hard to pull that all or nothing trigger.
01:49:51.000 I don't know any other way.
01:49:53.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:49:54.000 I mean, it seems that that's your style.
01:49:56.000 Yeah.
01:49:56.000 Is that bad?
01:49:57.000 No.
01:49:57.000 No.
01:49:58.000 But it's hard.
01:49:59.000 It's not bad.
01:50:01.000 I just think it's hard to make a connection with people that are true to themselves.
01:50:07.000 Most of the time, people, when you meet them, they're putting out a perception of themselves as how they would like to be seen.
01:50:14.000 So you're already...
01:50:15.000 Going through, like, two layers right there of what the person really is.
01:50:18.000 Or sometimes they might even be bullshitting themselves how they'd like to be.
01:50:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:50:22.000 So, like, whereas I'm not by any means perfect, but I pretty much, like, I talk a lot.
01:50:27.000 I talk about the same stuff.
01:50:28.000 Like, this is the same conversation I'd have with, like, my homie.
01:50:31.000 It's like, you know what I mean?
01:50:31.000 Like, it's kind of what you see is what you get, you know?
01:50:33.000 And I've only met very few people that are that way.
01:50:35.000 And so I think that oftentimes you've...
01:50:38.000 I tend to fall in love with this perception versus the person.
01:50:41.000 And so, in my case, sometimes I feel like it tends to be intense in the beginnings, and then I continue being on fire, and then maybe it's not so much that way.
01:50:50.000 But I'm also a very emotional person.
01:50:52.000 I'm like very, you know, till the bitter end.
01:50:55.000 Well, sometimes people can bullshit you for quite a long time before you really get used to what they're really like.
01:51:00.000 Yeah, yeah, totally.
01:51:01.000 So three or four months in, you're like, hmm, what am I doing here?
01:51:03.000 Three or four months is so short of a time, I think.
01:51:05.000 It is a short amount of time.
01:51:06.000 Yeah.
01:51:07.000 It is.
01:51:07.000 But you could find out everything about someone in three or four months of constantly being with them.
01:51:12.000 They can only hide their character for so long, which is, I think, but I always wonder about dudes like Paul McCartney.
01:51:18.000 Paul McCartney's a bad motherfucker.
01:51:19.000 But then you'd hear that ex-wife talk about him.
01:51:22.000 You ever heard the woman who had lost her leg in a motorcycle accident?
01:51:25.000 No.
01:51:26.000 She's demonic.
01:51:27.000 I mean, the way that lady would talk about Paul McCartney was like the most terrifying thing.
01:51:33.000 What did she say?
01:51:33.000 She was ridiculous.
01:51:34.000 I don't want to hear about that stuff.
01:51:35.000 Yeah, you don't want to hear it.
01:51:36.000 I'm like, what did she say?
01:51:37.000 Are you kidding?
01:51:38.000 Super negative.
01:51:38.000 People want to hear.
01:51:39.000 Super negative about if anything ever happened to her.
01:51:41.000 She has information hidden, secret places about him.
01:51:44.000 I'm doing the best to protect my husband.
01:51:45.000 She was just a crazy, evil person who wanted stacks of cash from him.
01:51:49.000 And his dumbass didn't get a prenuptial.
01:51:51.000 And he got roped in by a woman pretending to be something she wasn't.
01:51:54.000 And then once he had a kid with her, she just turned on the hooks and...
01:51:57.000 Fucking ripped her chest open and a monster flew out, and that was her.
01:52:01.000 And that was all the interviews after that.
01:52:03.000 You would listen to the interviews and go, how did he not see this coming, man?
01:52:06.000 How did he not know that he was with a crazy person?
01:52:08.000 Sometimes you want to believe in, I think, people's ability to be something, you know?
01:52:13.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:52:14.000 Also, he came out of a long-term relationship with Linda McCartney, who was supposed to be an amazing person, a really nice, sweet woman.
01:52:21.000 By all accounts, they got along great.
01:52:23.000 So he's probably his ideas of what relationships were like.
01:52:26.000 He really thought that's what you did.
01:52:27.000 You find someone.
01:52:28.000 You're just nice to them.
01:52:28.000 They're nice to you.
01:52:29.000 And this is just the way she really is.
01:52:30.000 He didn't even look for all the clues of craziness.
01:52:33.000 Maybe.
01:52:34.000 I mean, who knows?
01:52:34.000 I always think it's like, unless you're in it, you really don't know what's going on.
01:52:38.000 Right.
01:52:39.000 That's why he speculates.
01:52:40.000 It's fun.
01:52:40.000 And he talks shit at the same time.
01:52:42.000 It's great.
01:52:42.000 It's good times.
01:52:44.000 Speculating and talking shit on how Paul McCartney got roped in.
01:52:47.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:52:49.000 So you haven't had that many boyfriends because of that?
01:52:51.000 No, no, no.
01:52:52.000 I think I haven't had that many boyfriends because I'm always in long-term relationships, I think is what it is.
01:52:56.000 What?
01:52:57.000 He's like, so you haven't had any boyfriends?
01:52:59.000 Say it that way?
01:53:01.000 Damn, man, you're making me sound all creepy.
01:53:03.000 No!
01:53:04.000 When did he come up with that?
01:53:05.000 I don't know.
01:53:05.000 I didn't think that.
01:53:05.000 No, I don't know.
01:53:06.000 Thank you, Brian.
01:53:07.000 Thanks for having my back, homie.
01:53:09.000 No, but no, no.
01:53:10.000 So anyway, so...
01:53:11.000 Now the music needs to go on.
01:53:14.000 I know.
01:53:15.000 A girl getting cum on her tattoo again.
01:53:18.000 No!
01:53:18.000 It's a really important story.
01:53:20.000 Have you ever been to the Olive Garden?
01:53:23.000 That is the most ridiculous shit ever.
01:53:26.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:53:27.000 Yeah, love is a funny thing.
01:53:28.000 It's hard as fuck.
01:53:29.000 But you gotta find the right person.
01:53:31.000 That's what it is.
01:53:31.000 I mean, the right person for you might not be the right person for somebody else.
01:53:34.000 And finding that perfect interaction with people, it's almost impossible.
01:53:40.000 It's so hard.
01:53:41.000 It's so hard to line up.
01:53:42.000 Especially for a chick like you.
01:53:43.000 Because you have to have some serious bad motherfucker.
01:53:47.000 You can't just have some regular dude.
01:53:49.000 I think it's all about the heart, really, to be honest with you.
01:53:52.000 When it comes to the amount of solidness that I guess I require.
01:53:57.000 Yeah, but for a dude to not be tweaked by you being all hot and famous, covered in tattoos and all...
01:54:03.000 Wild, crazy, famous tattoo lady.
01:54:05.000 That's a tough one for a guy.
01:54:06.000 That's a serious obstacle.
01:54:06.000 You need like a Braveheart dude.
01:54:08.000 Yeah.
01:54:09.000 You need some Maori warrior type character.
01:54:12.000 It just seems like...
01:54:14.000 I think I would just want to be with somebody who can get it, you know, and like I could relate to or understand.
01:54:21.000 It's a little chubby and there's a comic or something.
01:54:24.000 He's putting himself out there.
01:54:26.000 That's what he's doing.
01:54:27.000 That was my creepiness.
01:54:29.000 I like intelligence.
01:54:31.000 Women like Jennifer Lopez, she's doomed to a life of betas.
01:54:34.000 She's going to have to date these beta men and buy them cars and they'll be younger than her and that's it.
01:54:39.000 That's just the way it goes from now on.
01:54:41.000 To be a badder motherfucker than Jennifer Lopez, good luck.
01:54:46.000 Good luck, fella.
01:54:47.000 Who the fuck is?
01:54:48.000 You got like Brad Pitt and a couple other dudes, the only people who can date her.
01:54:52.000 Her dating pool is down to like five people and most of them are married already.
01:54:56.000 It's like, good luck.
01:54:57.000 But she's got to go the other way.
01:54:59.000 I think you're going to have to go that way too.
01:55:01.000 You're going to have to get some beta, manservant type dudes.
01:55:03.000 No, I couldn't handle that.
01:55:06.000 I'm telling you, that's why I want to bring Brian into your life.
01:55:09.000 This shit would be perfect.
01:55:11.000 He would worship you.
01:55:13.000 He would set up your website.
01:55:16.000 Are you on the podcast?
01:55:20.000 He could really spice up your Twitter background.
01:55:24.000 You can make shit happen.
01:55:29.000 That's funny shit.
01:55:31.000 If there is one dilemma that people find in life that's most prevalent in our society, It's finding the right person.
01:55:40.000 It's probably the biggest dilemma that anybody ever faces.
01:55:43.000 When you're growing up, especially, you're always like, man, if I could just find the right girl, if I could just find the right guy.
01:55:48.000 For everybody, that's the number one dilemma.
01:55:51.000 It's more just like working on yourself first, and then you put yourself in a position.
01:55:58.000 You know what I mean?
01:55:58.000 Because I know that in the past, where it's kind of like the hippie stuff we were talking about earlier, it's like water is seeking its own level, and I feel like...
01:56:06.000 I look back at my last...
01:56:08.000 You know, a relationship that was an awful mess.
01:56:12.000 It's like, part of me feels like, oh my god, I got duped or something.
01:56:15.000 But then another part of me is like, I created this to a certain degree too.
01:56:19.000 If it's like, if there's like, there's red flags that I failed to see because I wanted to believe that it was something else.
01:56:26.000 People do that all the time, so it's more like, okay, well, at the end of the day, what's wrong with me?
01:56:31.000 What was my part in it?
01:56:33.000 What could I have done to...
01:56:35.000 Obviously, that does not discredit people's shitty behavior.
01:56:38.000 Obviously, some people suck and stuff, and some people are really good liars and whatever.
01:56:42.000 But you have to grow as well.
01:56:47.000 Yeah, I think it's more important to put yourself in a situation where you can be receptive to a healthy relationship.
01:56:51.000 Like, you know, when I was depressed, I, like, kind of gravitated towards other people that were also sad, and that doesn't help, you know what I mean?
01:56:59.000 So, I think, as far as, like, what you're saying is, like, finding somebody at a level or whatever, yeah, there's that nice understandability, like, you know, I can...
01:57:06.000 Talk about things that bug me that may not bug like a regular person or whatever, but it's more like the connection of the mind, you know?
01:57:13.000 I want to be inspired by somebody who's equally as driven and equally like wanting to create and like that shit drives me crazy like when someone's into it, you know?
01:57:21.000 Whether you're a busboy or a fucking famous musician.
01:57:24.000 Yeah, what I'm saying is you're fucked.
01:57:25.000 You're never going to find a dude like that.
01:57:27.000 Yeah, so I read poetry and then why do you think...
01:57:29.000 The crazy thing is...
01:57:31.000 I said the C word earlier, Jesus.
01:57:33.000 Did you really?
01:57:34.000 How dare you?
01:57:34.000 Anybody dating like a Jessica Alba, that dude has to deal with the fact that She's really good friends with a lot of A-list celebrities, right?
01:57:42.000 This is the Siberia thing because it's like all those things are mentally generated ideas of what's important or what's good.
01:57:50.000 I don't see it that way, you know what I mean?
01:57:53.000 I'm not saying I could fall in love with anybody, but if it's your mind or your soul, whatever you want to call it, I could fall in love with that.
01:58:02.000 It really does not...
01:58:04.000 Have to do with what the world's perception of you is.
01:58:07.000 Yeah, you say that, but you're going to find out how much that gardener makes and be like, bitch, you can't even take me out to dinner.
01:58:12.000 What the fuck kind of relationship we got going on here?
01:58:15.000 Nah, it's not that way.
01:58:16.000 Most of the time, I have issues with dudes paying for my stuff.
01:58:20.000 Do you really?
01:58:20.000 Yeah, I think it's probably because my own set of issues is like, you know, I'm not a feminist or I don't consider myself anything, but I think...
01:58:29.000 You know, just growing up poor, I'm always like, oh, I can do it myself!
01:58:32.000 Don't throw me the door for me!
01:58:34.000 Yeah, no, that makes sense.
01:58:36.000 I would hate to be a girl and have dudes buy me dinner and then expect something from me.
01:58:41.000 No, if it's a sincere gift, it's such a difference, you know?
01:58:44.000 But I also like, I don't know...
01:58:46.000 Yeah.
01:58:47.000 You're gonna be single for a long time, kid.
01:58:49.000 It's not gonna work out.
01:58:51.000 Maybe, maybe not.
01:58:51.000 I'd be down or damn.
01:58:53.000 I'm just saying.
01:58:54.000 I don't know.
01:58:55.000 You're too much of a bad motherfucker.
01:58:57.000 It's really gonna be hard.
01:58:58.000 There's some bad motherfuckers out there.
01:58:59.000 You know how many rock star friends she's like really close to?
01:59:03.000 Yeah, you get those guys alone.
01:59:04.000 They all fall apart.
01:59:06.000 Yeah, but...
01:59:09.000 That would intimidate some guys.
01:59:11.000 Guys would be like, damn, she's best friends with him, him, him.
01:59:15.000 That would be the saddest thing is if you're really into a rock star and then you started dating him and he was just a whiny bitch.
01:59:21.000 You'd be like, really, man?
01:59:23.000 You stopped liking the music.
01:59:24.000 I thought your fucking music was awesome.
01:59:26.000 Imagine if you started dating Mick Jagger and just found that he's a cunt.
01:59:30.000 Mick Jagger's a fucking dumb cunt.
01:59:32.000 You're like, what?
01:59:33.000 God damn it!
01:59:35.000 That has to be the hardest for a girl.
01:59:37.000 Date a rock star and find out he's a dork.
01:59:40.000 That would be the hardest shit ever.
01:59:41.000 Breaking up with a rock star.
01:59:42.000 Mick Jagger.
01:59:43.000 That would crush the rock star.
01:59:45.000 Fuck yeah, man.
01:59:45.000 That would crush him.
01:59:46.000 Yeah.
01:59:46.000 Wow.
01:59:48.000 Yeah, that would be devastating.
01:59:49.000 Rock stars don't get broken up with.
01:59:51.000 They do, though.
01:59:52.000 They get dumped.
01:59:53.000 Especially in this day and age.
01:59:55.000 You know, I think in the protected days of the 60s and the 70s, I've read some shit about Hendrix, man.
01:59:59.000 I got so bummed out.
02:00:01.000 Because I'm a huge Hendrix fan.
02:00:02.000 And I was reading an excerpt from this book about him.
02:00:07.000 And one of them was about Jimi Hendrix beating the shit out of his girlfriend.
02:00:11.000 They're like, Jimi Hendrix would just smack around on his girlfriends.
02:00:13.000 But again, we weren't there.
02:00:14.000 That's the thing.
02:00:15.000 It's true.
02:00:15.000 You're right.
02:00:16.000 Standing up for woman beaters.
02:00:17.000 I like it.
02:00:18.000 No!
02:00:18.000 No!
02:00:19.000 No, no, no.
02:00:20.000 Great culture!
02:00:22.000 Powerful Jamie Kilstein.
02:00:23.000 No.
02:00:25.000 Just because, I don't know.
02:00:26.000 No, no, you're absolutely right.
02:00:27.000 The guy was a band member.
02:00:29.000 He could have been a jealous bitch.
02:00:30.000 He's the guy who's in the band with one of the greatest fucking guitars.
02:00:33.000 She could have put acid in his coffee.
02:00:34.000 It might not have ever happened.
02:00:36.000 Beating, I think?
02:00:37.000 Yeah.
02:00:37.000 I'm just kidding.
02:00:37.000 Please, that's what he likes.
02:00:38.000 A little acid in his coffee.
02:00:39.000 No.
02:00:40.000 But, I mean, who knows what really happened?
02:00:43.000 But reading about that, it was like, wow, that's so...
02:00:45.000 Like, you read some tweets that Chris Brown makes, and he's a fucking moron.
02:00:50.000 He makes these tweets, and everybody hates him, and they go after him, and then he deletes these tweets.
02:00:54.000 What does he say?
02:00:55.000 Just really stupid shit about...
02:00:57.000 After the whole Rihanna thing, he would get in arguments with people about him beating up women.
02:01:03.000 He's a moron.
02:01:04.000 So there were really gross kind of tweets.
02:01:06.000 But that didn't exist in the Led Zeppelin days.
02:01:12.000 There was no Twitter.
02:01:14.000 Yeah, there was no internet.
02:01:15.000 If they had a podcast or an internet radio show where we got to hear them argue about chicks on the road, and you'd be like, oh, you guys are gross.
02:01:25.000 That would suck.
02:01:27.000 That would suck.
02:01:28.000 It's like the mystery was so much better than...
02:01:31.000 It's like Robert Plant, the mystery of Robert Plant.
02:01:34.000 I remember growing up being a huge Zeppelin fan.
02:01:36.000 I barely knew 10 words that Robert Plant said in an interview.
02:01:41.000 I don't think I heard any interviews.
02:01:43.000 I just knew.
02:01:44.000 I just knew Black Dog was the shit.
02:01:46.000 I just knew.
02:01:48.000 A whole lot of love was the greatest song in the history of the world.
02:01:50.000 That's all I knew.
02:01:51.000 I didn't know anything about Robert Plant.
02:01:53.000 He might be annoying as fuck.
02:01:54.000 Imagine if you've dated Robert Plant, he just turns out to be a total prima donna.
02:01:59.000 Just annoying and stupid and always insecure and wants everybody to kiss his ass like, fuck!
02:02:05.000 Really?
02:02:06.000 Damn!
02:02:08.000 It's like when Mel Gibson was screaming at that ex-girlfriend.
02:02:11.000 Shut up and blow me!
02:02:14.000 And he's like yelling on her answering.
02:02:16.000 Maybe she was talking so much.
02:02:18.000 I'm sure she was.
02:02:19.000 I'm sure she was.
02:02:20.000 But it was like, we never got a chance to see someone so human before that was like a fucking Mel Gibson.
02:02:26.000 I mean, he was Braveheart.
02:02:28.000 And then all of a sudden he's screaming to some scammer.
02:02:31.000 Some Russian scammer chick who's robbing him and recording all of his phone calls.
02:02:36.000 Sure.
02:02:37.000 Shut up and blow me!
02:02:39.000 And you're like, wow.
02:02:40.000 Like, this is Mel Gibson, man.
02:02:42.000 This is the Lethal Weapon dude.
02:02:45.000 What the fuck?
02:02:46.000 He's actually kind of just like that character in Lethal Weapon, wasn't he?
02:02:50.000 Yeah, but he was kind.
02:02:53.000 He was crazy, but kind to women.
02:02:54.000 What was wrong with the crazy?
02:02:57.000 What was wrong with the crazy, first of all, is he was scary as fuck to a woman who had his child.
02:03:02.000 Like, he couldn't even keep it together to this woman who had his child.
02:03:05.000 That was the scariest thing.
02:03:06.000 It's like he had a baby with this person.
02:03:07.000 She's watching his baby, and he's fucking screaming bloody murder at her.
02:03:12.000 He's a scary dude, you know?
02:03:14.000 Didn't that freak you out?
02:03:15.000 The Mel Gibson shit?
02:03:16.000 No, I don't even know nothing about it.
02:03:18.000 I don't give a fuck about Mel Gibson.
02:03:19.000 No, no.
02:03:20.000 I just...
02:03:20.000 It's like...
02:03:21.000 I don't know.
02:03:22.000 You didn't hear that thing when it was in the news?
02:03:24.000 No, I really don't watch television.
02:03:26.000 I like knowing the human side of people.
02:03:29.000 I love reality shows.
02:03:30.000 I actually do.
02:03:31.000 I like Mob Wives and Mama Drama.
02:03:34.000 Forget about it.
02:03:35.000 Watch Mama Drama.
02:03:36.000 Is Mama Drama the one with the little girl, the...
02:03:39.000 Mama Drama is...
02:03:41.000 They take six sets of mothers and daughters that party together.
02:03:45.000 They're like 43 and 22. 51. And they put six couples, half of them black, half of them white, in a penthouse in Vegas.
02:03:54.000 And they get drunk.
02:03:56.000 Every day.
02:03:57.000 It's hysterical.
02:03:58.000 Wow.
02:03:59.000 It's great.
02:03:59.000 It's genius.
02:04:00.000 Yeah, there's some fun in reality shows, but, you know, it's really like mindless distraction.
02:04:06.000 That's the problem.
02:04:07.000 You don't get anything out of it.
02:04:08.000 Sometimes you need that.
02:04:09.000 Do you like that?
02:04:10.000 I like not thinking about shit and watching South Park or watching some mind...
02:04:15.000 I want to be mindless.
02:04:17.000 It's like meditation.
02:04:18.000 Hmm.
02:04:18.000 I don't mind mindlessness if it's in the form of comedy, like South Park type shit.
02:04:22.000 It's nice knowing how people really are.
02:04:23.000 Like, holy shit, mob wives in the Chicago season?
02:04:26.000 People aren't really like that.
02:04:27.000 People aren't really like that.
02:04:28.000 They're not?
02:04:28.000 No, I mean, I think you're put in a hyper...
02:04:31.000 It's such a...
02:04:33.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:04:33.000 They put the alcohol, they make them live together.
02:04:35.000 It's edited and produced.
02:04:37.000 I totally believe that.
02:04:38.000 However, there really are people that are acting like that on camera.
02:04:42.000 And that's what's fascinating.
02:04:44.000 I love it.
02:04:45.000 It definitely doesn't inspire anything.
02:04:47.000 I TiVo, that shit.
02:04:50.000 Some days, Mob Wives comes out?
02:04:51.000 Are you kidding?
02:04:52.000 It's so stupid.
02:04:54.000 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, I watched the Real Housewives of Miami ad the other day.
02:04:59.000 Just the ad.
02:05:00.000 And I cringed and I just grabbed the remote controller, shut it off quick.
02:05:03.000 Just thinking that these women could enter into my life somehow or another through me watching them on TV. That somehow or another they could make their way into my life and be annoying and yapping at me.
02:05:13.000 They were hitting each other and screaming at each other.
02:05:15.000 In Miami, you gotta do this and you gotta do that.
02:05:18.000 Come on.
02:05:19.000 I don't watch that show.
02:05:20.000 I don't watch all reality shows.
02:05:21.000 Just a couple.
02:05:23.000 There's gotta be fighting and violence.
02:05:24.000 If there's not fighting, I don't wanna watch it.
02:05:26.000 Is that a weird position for you to be in a reality show?
02:05:29.000 You got a very different sort of reality show.
02:05:32.000 Because it's obviously a reality show about your artwork.
02:05:35.000 I mean, it's about your expression.
02:05:36.000 It's about your skill.
02:05:37.000 Well, I mean, originally we had a docu-series.
02:05:39.000 It was a very formatted show.
02:05:40.000 It was like where the premise was like you would learn the story behind each of the tattoos and the interaction between tattooer and client.
02:05:50.000 That was 80% of the show and then 20% of it was our own personal life stories that were somehow connected to tattooing.
02:05:58.000 And then as the show went on, I can't believe we were on for so long.
02:06:04.000 How many seasons were you on for?
02:06:06.000 It's weird because contractually it's different.
02:06:11.000 We're basically on for seven years, six or seven years.
02:06:16.000 Wow, that's incredible.
02:06:17.000 Yeah.
02:06:17.000 Well, it's a great premise for a show.
02:06:19.000 Yeah, but then it started warping into more, it flips, so it's like 20% art and 80% drama, and most of it was produced, hence how that girl got on the show, which I don't know her.
02:06:29.000 It was fake.
02:06:31.000 Yeah, but why do that?
02:06:33.000 See, that's Hollywood idiots.
02:06:35.000 Because I think, personally, first of all, I'm a fan of tattoos and art.
02:06:38.000 Yeah, of course.
02:06:39.000 And just having a show where it was just you produce it, you dictate what's going on, just about tattoos and art.
02:06:45.000 It seems like you could do that, though.
02:06:47.000 And people would enjoy it, and it would be pure.
02:06:49.000 I mean, I would watch a time-lapse of, oh my god, that's old footage.
02:06:52.000 Look how Why shouldn't you do it that way?
02:06:54.000 I mean, it seems like someone would be an idiot to try to do it any way other than your personality.
02:06:59.000 Why would they not do it that way?
02:07:00.000 Well, you know, I think, sadly, it's the demand.
02:07:05.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:07:06.000 But it's not the demand.
02:07:07.000 It is the demand because what it is, it's all based on money and numbers for the network.
02:07:11.000 So whatever...
02:07:13.000 Situations and drama show peaks and they have these tests that they run.
02:07:18.000 That's what they...
02:07:19.000 And I don't believe in it.
02:07:20.000 I can't disagree more with you.
02:07:22.000 This is why.
02:07:23.000 Listen, I would...
02:07:24.000 I'm on your side.
02:07:26.000 I know you are.
02:07:27.000 I know you are.
02:07:27.000 But the way that the network sees it is what's going to generate more money and it's going to be viewership because they can sell advertisement.
02:07:33.000 They're wrong about that.
02:07:34.000 I know they are.
02:07:34.000 Of course they're wrong.
02:07:35.000 That's why they've played it out.
02:07:37.000 Well, what they're doing is they just go with the box.
02:07:40.000 They go with what's worked before.
02:07:43.000 This is the formula.
02:07:44.000 Here's the wacky neighbor.
02:07:45.000 Go.
02:07:46.000 That's the formula.
02:07:48.000 It doesn't have to be that.
02:07:49.000 I wish we had a wacky neighbor.
02:07:51.000 You can get a wacky neighbor.
02:07:52.000 Brian, you want to be your wacky neighbor?
02:07:54.000 He would be awesome at it.
02:07:56.000 Give you the wacky roommate.
02:07:57.000 He's a breakthrough talent, I'm telling you.
02:07:59.000 He could really knock you guys over the top.
02:08:03.000 Bring the ratings to the top.
02:08:05.000 It's just, people enjoy people who are really good at things.
02:08:09.000 I mean, that's really what it is.
02:08:09.000 Yeah, but people also enjoy train wrecks, which is why you love the Housewives.
02:08:13.000 But they don't only enjoy that.
02:08:14.000 I don't think they only do, but I think that there is definitely people, not everybody, but some people get lost in that.
02:08:24.000 They do, but there's a lot of dumb shit on my DVR. There's plenty of dumb shit.
02:08:29.000 I watch dumb shit both for escape and for material, because there's some funny shit in it.
02:08:35.000 But there's also a lot of really intelligent shit on my DVR, too.
02:08:39.000 Documentaries, that Morgan Freeman show, Through the Wormhole.
02:08:42.000 Fucking amazing show.
02:08:43.000 But it's like the same people watch both things.
02:08:46.000 And I think that a well-produced version of your show that's you decide what the fuck goes on.
02:08:52.000 You decide.
02:08:53.000 You're the artist.
02:08:54.000 Yeah, of course.
02:08:55.000 You talk to these people about their ideas.
02:08:57.000 You create their tattoos.
02:08:59.000 And stop fucking around with all that fake shit and it would be beautiful.
02:09:02.000 I would love that.
02:09:02.000 Those dumb motherfuckers.
02:09:03.000 Leave Kat Von D alone, you stupid fucks.
02:09:05.000 No, I just think...
02:09:06.000 You Hollywood hacks.
02:09:07.000 You just gotta cut out that middleman.
02:09:09.000 You cookie-cutter cunts.
02:09:10.000 You don't know what you're doing.
02:09:11.000 Leave her alone.
02:09:12.000 Yeah, yeah, that's it.
02:09:13.000 You tell them.
02:09:14.000 Yeah, those fucks creating some fake nonsense.
02:09:16.000 Silly, silly bitches.
02:09:18.000 Yeah, I ended up just filming, like, I secretly filmed a documentary for the last three years, and we're actually finally pretty much done with it.
02:09:25.000 And it's awesome, it's so freeing, you know, to be able to do it that way and having the control and stuff.
02:09:30.000 And I wish I could have given as much as I gave in my documentary to the show, but I really couldn't because it wasn't mine, you know?
02:09:37.000 You should totally have your own show for the internet.
02:09:41.000 It would be fucking gigantic.
02:09:43.000 Just film while you're working.
02:09:45.000 You're going to do it anyway.
02:09:46.000 Just film while you're working.
02:09:47.000 Loosely edit it.
02:09:49.000 Throw a little bumper in the beginning.
02:09:51.000 Throw that shit online.
02:09:51.000 I'll get a million views a day.
02:09:53.000 Nobody wants to see good stuff.
02:09:55.000 I know, but I want to create things with a lot of quality, so I can't just half-ass edit stuff.
02:10:00.000 Slap that bitch together.
02:10:02.000 I have to get my friend who does classical composure.
02:10:07.000 You're kind of a control freak, too.
02:10:08.000 No, I just have creative intentions.
02:10:14.000 An excellence freak.
02:10:16.000 You want it to be excellent.
02:10:17.000 Yeah.
02:10:19.000 But I think nowadays, just with everything I have going on, it's so time-consuming to do a television show.
02:10:24.000 Do you take on apprentices or do you have assistants or people who ever work with you who want to learn how to tattoo?
02:10:29.000 Has that ever happened?
02:10:29.000 We kind of like don't.
02:10:30.000 At our shop, you know, I have 20 guys that work with me and I love them.
02:10:33.000 We're like, we're brothers and sisters.
02:10:35.000 20 guys!
02:10:35.000 Yeah I mean you know this includes like our shop managers and stuff like that you know and and like Dennis he's like my first guy ever hired he's like still there everybody's we're so close like what you see on television those were you know like the the cast members that they didn't work at the shop with the exception of Dan Smith like everybody else kind of just kind of they weren't really the true HVT crew you know I mean right but um And we love each other.
02:10:59.000 We love the way it is.
02:11:00.000 And I feel like when you have an apprentice, it changes the dynamic because it makes somebody better than somebody else.
02:11:06.000 And the way that we work is that we're all good at what we do in different ways.
02:11:09.000 So we're all better and not as good as each other.
02:11:13.000 And we inspire each other and keep each other.
02:11:14.000 You know what I mean?
02:11:15.000 So it's a collective.
02:11:16.000 It's totally collective and it's awesome.
02:11:18.000 That sounds badass.
02:11:20.000 How does someone break into your fold?
02:11:23.000 That's the hardest thing.
02:11:25.000 Every time we've let anybody outside the circle in, it's never really worked out the way we need it.
02:11:30.000 So it's basically just who we know and kind of comes through that way.
02:11:35.000 Were there any people when you were growing up that you looked towards for inspiration that inspired you and just gave you momentum to create art?
02:11:48.000 Yeah, I mean, I think like when I was a kid, I used to look at tattoo magazines.
02:11:52.000 And when I say kid, I mean like 16 and stuff.
02:11:54.000 And like, I remember looking up to Jack Rudy.
02:11:57.000 He was like, you know, the black and gray Godfather and all this stuff.
02:12:00.000 Amazing work that guy did.
02:12:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:12:02.000 And so the day I turned 18, beforehand, I made an appointment with him.
02:12:06.000 Really?
02:12:06.000 Once in advance.
02:12:07.000 And I was so excited about it.
02:12:08.000 And I went and got this tattoo.
02:12:10.000 And I sat there for the fucking six hours it took or whatever.
02:12:14.000 And it's one of my favorite tattoos.
02:12:16.000 It's so beautiful.
02:12:16.000 I still love it.
02:12:17.000 But I remember him sitting there going like, you know, you guys don't have any business in the business and all this stuff.
02:12:23.000 And I was like an 18 year old kid back then.
02:12:25.000 And, you know, he's very old school and like sees things a different way.
02:12:28.000 And at the time I was like heartbroken, you know, I was like, oh, my hero, I don't know, he wasn't a hero, but like he was somebody I admired his work.
02:12:38.000 Like, shut me down.
02:12:40.000 But then at the same time, I'm like, ah, it's cool.
02:12:41.000 Like, I'll watch this.
02:12:43.000 You know what I mean?
02:12:43.000 And then now, you know, fast forward now, we know each other and, you know, he's...
02:12:49.000 Did you tell him that story?
02:12:51.000 Um, no, he knows it.
02:12:53.000 He doesn't remember.
02:12:55.000 I bet he doesn't remember.
02:12:57.000 Yeah, but I remember one of the coolest stories.
02:13:01.000 Yeah, when I was tattooing unprofessionally, when I was an amateur 16-year-old, I had heard that there was this girl who owned a shop in Culver City.
02:13:08.000 It was the only female artist that owned a shop.
02:13:11.000 I was like, whoa, and her name was Erica Stanley.
02:13:13.000 She was badass.
02:13:14.000 And so I remember going down National, and I go in there, and I was like...
02:13:19.000 Oh my god, we're here, and it was just a tattoo shop, whatever, and I see her, and she's like really beautiful, and she's just like a power, she's like a force of nature, and she's like, can I help you?
02:13:28.000 And I'm like, yeah, you know, and I was just probably being overly cocky, thinking that I had gained a place in the tattoo industry when I was just a 16-year-old little pumpkin with a bullshit bang on my arm, and it's like, And I'm just like, oh man, so do you have any advice for me?
02:13:43.000 And I remember she's like, yeah, the best advice I could give you is run while you can.
02:13:48.000 And I remember I was so pissed off, like, oh yeah, well, fuck you, you know?
02:13:51.000 And I left, and then years later, I understood what she meant by it.
02:13:54.000 You know, it wasn't that she was saying, oh, you're not good enough.
02:13:56.000 It's just like, ah, like if you got the eye of the tiger, you're going to do it, and you're going to figure out yourself.
02:14:00.000 There's nothing I could tell you that's going to make you badass, you know?
02:14:03.000 If I were to sit there and coddle you, like...
02:14:05.000 How good is that?
02:14:05.000 And she saw tattooing as sacred.
02:14:08.000 And I remember I went to my first tattoo convention when I was 18. It was like Ink Slingers.
02:14:13.000 I don't even know if it's still around.
02:14:15.000 And one of these guys that I tattooed a Vargas portrait on entered it into the contest of best black and gray.
02:14:22.000 And she was the judge.
02:14:23.000 And, you know, she never knew my name at the time when I was 16. And I got first place.
02:14:28.000 And she voted for me.
02:14:29.000 And I remember going up.
02:14:30.000 She's like, oh, congratulations.
02:14:31.000 It was really beautiful.
02:14:32.000 I'm like, hey, you know what?
02:14:32.000 It's funny.
02:14:33.000 When I was 16, I went to your shop and you told me that I should go run while I can.
02:14:37.000 And she goes, oh my god.
02:14:39.000 No, I'm like, I just want to say thank you.
02:14:40.000 It's cool, you know?
02:14:41.000 Well, you accepted that inspiration the right way.
02:14:44.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:14:44.000 And she's still badass.
02:14:45.000 It was cool.
02:14:46.000 You know, she's still, I think, a pioneer as far as LA goes, you know?
02:14:50.000 And it's cool.
02:14:52.000 Comics and tattoo artists have a lot in common in that it's very much an outside chance of success.
02:15:00.000 We're all fucked up.
02:15:01.000 Yeah, we're both fucked up.
02:15:04.000 We both have too much expression.
02:15:07.000 And it's one of those things where, like, you know, if you say, what does your daughter do?
02:15:12.000 Oh, my daughter's a tattoo artist.
02:15:13.000 Like, oh, Jesus.
02:15:15.000 You're picturing fucking biker bars and I'd be scared if you told me your daughter's a cheerleader.
02:15:19.000 I'd be like, oh, yeah, around football players?
02:15:21.000 Yeah, ridiculous.
02:15:22.000 But, you know, you say, oh, my daughter's Kat Von D. It's like, oh, she's a famous celebrity tattooist.
02:15:29.000 I've seen that show.
02:15:30.000 She's beautiful.
02:15:32.000 It's a different sort of, you know, it's like, if you try to tell your parents you want to be a comic, they look at you like, good fucking luck.
02:15:40.000 You need to get a job that's going to work.
02:15:42.000 What do you really Yeah, exactly.
02:15:44.000 Well, you know, you need to have a backup plan.
02:15:46.000 And, you know, I don't think anybody before you, that's the nuttiest thing about what you did is you became like, I mean, Ami, I guess, is famous too, but he's not famous in the same way.
02:15:55.000 You know, that show, was that the first show?
02:15:58.000 Miami Inc.
02:15:58.000 Was that the first of those Inc.
02:16:00.000 shows?
02:16:00.000 He, for whatever reason, it just never, it wasn't the same thing.
02:16:03.000 It was a lack of sincerity, that's all.
02:16:04.000 Is that what it is?
02:16:05.000 Yeah, I think so.
02:16:06.000 I mean, people, I mean, a guy with a shirt off, and I'm not saying that he's not, I don't know him anymore.
02:16:11.000 I haven't seen him in years since those times, and back then I was a drunken mess, but, you know, people can, I think your looks get you so far, you know, and after a while you have to actually care about what you're doing, and you know what I mean?
02:16:23.000 So...
02:16:24.000 I think at the time, it was probably hard.
02:16:26.000 I can only assume how difficult it would be for something so new, like a sensation of a new tattoo show and being the front man for that.
02:16:34.000 It must be sidetracking at times, maybe.
02:16:37.000 I'm not sure.
02:16:37.000 Right, and then you can make mistakes that if you could go back and do it again, knowing the reaction to all those different things, you'd probably do something a little different.
02:16:44.000 Yeah, maybe not be so mean to people.
02:16:45.000 Yeah, I know what you're talking about.
02:16:47.000 So it's that, you know...
02:16:49.000 Sometimes it's hard when there's no one fucked up before you.
02:16:52.000 No one fucked up before you that you could watch and learn from.
02:16:55.000 I don't know.
02:16:55.000 Look at all the assholes in the world and be like, I don't want to be like them.
02:16:59.000 There you go.
02:17:00.000 There's your example.
02:17:01.000 And that is the case.
02:17:03.000 We don't live in a vacuum.
02:17:05.000 We all need those assholes to show us what it feels like to watch someone be an asshole.
02:17:09.000 Yeah.
02:17:10.000 I think.
02:17:11.000 Just as much as you need inspirational people.
02:17:14.000 Yeah.
02:17:14.000 I guess we need them all.
02:17:15.000 We need everybody, right, Brian?
02:17:18.000 Oh, yeah.
02:17:19.000 What are you doing over there?
02:17:20.000 Drinking Coke, Sarah.
02:17:23.000 Got you off guard, you fucker.
02:17:24.000 I'm chugging.
02:17:25.000 Listen, Kat, this has been a lot of fun.
02:17:27.000 Yeah, thank you guys so much for having me, and I loved hanging out with you.
02:17:29.000 Anytime, anytime.
02:17:30.000 You know, you're very easy to talk to.
02:17:32.000 Oh, cool.
02:17:33.000 Really cool to talk to.
02:17:34.000 How long of a wait do you have on your...
02:17:36.000 Do you have, like, three years or something crazy like that?
02:17:38.000 Would you be willing to draw a Death Squad cat on Brian's back?
02:17:41.000 Draw or tattoo?
02:17:42.000 Tattoo, I'm sorry.
02:17:43.000 Yeah.
02:17:44.000 You know what I mean.
02:17:45.000 I just need to get mine fixed.
02:17:47.000 Oh, yeah, that one that's fucked up.
02:17:49.000 Yeah, what could you do?
02:17:50.000 Pull that shit up.
02:17:50.000 What could you do to that?
02:17:52.000 What could you do to that?
02:17:53.000 Would he have to go and get that lasered?
02:17:56.000 The options are endless.
02:17:57.000 No, you can do something.
02:17:58.000 You got options.
02:17:59.000 Really?
02:17:59.000 Yeah, we'll talk.
02:18:00.000 Cool.
02:18:01.000 Really?
02:18:01.000 Yeah.
02:18:02.000 You think you could do a cover-up on that?
02:18:04.000 That sucker?
02:18:04.000 Maybe, it depends.
02:18:05.000 All right, beautiful.
02:18:06.000 Look at that, Brian.
02:18:07.000 We've got something going on here for you.
02:18:08.000 Sweet.
02:18:08.000 It's beautiful.
02:18:09.000 Listen, is there anything that people...
02:18:11.000 Is there anything you're selling?
02:18:13.000 I know you had a book out for a while.
02:18:15.000 You're still selling it.
02:18:15.000 Can people buy that?
02:18:16.000 I'm not a good commercial.
02:18:17.000 Do you have a website that people can go and stalk you from?
02:18:20.000 Her book is actually...
02:18:21.000 They'll figure it out.
02:18:22.000 Her book's online.
02:18:23.000 Here it is right here.
02:18:25.000 Oh, you guys are forcing stuff on there?
02:18:26.000 No, no one's forcing anything.
02:18:28.000 Honestly, I'm just happy to be here.
02:18:30.000 We're happy to have you.
02:18:31.000 And hang out.
02:18:31.000 I'm honored that you chose to come here and hang out with us.
02:18:33.000 Yeah, and sorry it took so long, too.
02:18:35.000 I wanted to come in sooner.
02:18:36.000 Oh, no, it's awesome.
02:18:36.000 Anytime you want to come back, too.
02:18:38.000 Please, come back.
02:18:38.000 Thank you, guys.
02:18:38.000 It was really fun.
02:18:39.000 It was very fun talking to you.
02:18:40.000 Bye.
02:18:41.000 And you can check her out on Twitter, TheCatVonD, you dirty fucks.
02:18:44.000 And also Eddie Bravo.
02:18:46.000 Check Eddie Bravo out on 10thPlanetJJ.com.
02:18:49.000 Go and learn how to choke people, bitch.
02:18:51.000 Learn how to get it together.
02:18:53.000 Put it together on the mat.
02:18:54.000 Go to deathsquad.tv, pick up some cat shirts.
02:18:57.000 Brian's got two available.
02:18:58.000 There's still some of the original available and the new ones.
02:19:01.000 Oh, they're not yet?
02:19:02.000 No.
02:19:03.000 I've got to get them out of the warehouse.
02:19:03.000 Okay, we'll get them out of the warehouse.
02:19:05.000 And thank you to Onnit.com.
02:19:07.000 That's O-N-N-I-T. Use the codename GotYourBack.
02:19:11.000 What's today's date?
02:19:12.000 The 10th.
02:19:12.000 The 10th.
02:19:13.000 For two more days, you get 18% off.
02:19:15.000 And after that, codename Rogan, you will save 10% off any and all orders of supplements.
02:19:21.000 All right, you fucks.
02:19:22.000 We'll see you guys tomorrow with my good pal Tommy Segura.
02:19:25.000 And then we will return again on Thursday with the great Mac Danzig.
02:19:30.000 So I'm looking forward to this very much.
02:19:33.000 And have yourself a great weekend.
02:19:35.000 My new studio is done.
02:19:36.000 I got the lease.
02:19:37.000 Brian and I are going to go check it out tomorrow when we start planning.
02:19:40.000 The clock guy is going to do some stuff for us.
02:19:42.000 Cool.
02:19:42.000 He's going to build some shit.
02:19:43.000 Awesome.
02:19:44.000 Yeah, that guy's awesome.
02:19:45.000 All right.
02:19:46.000 We love you guys.
02:19:47.000 Thank you.