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00:05:29.000And what it is, is L-tryptophan converts to 5-HTP, 5-HTP converts to serotonin.
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00:08:18.000Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day.
00:08:22.000Young Chris D'Elia out there in the wild, the wild of Hollywood, on a billboard.
00:08:49.000today and do you feel 47 no but i take all kinds of shit to keep me feeling fucking fresh and fucking hormones and fucking athletic supplements and shit you know guys like you guys like you just make me feel like i'm gonna die soon because you you seem like a buddy i would hang with like that and you know you are but like you seem like somebody that's my age and then when i realize oh yeah you're not i'm like how the fuck am i gonna feel because i definitely feel less energetic than i was when i was 25.
00:12:50.000i lifted weights dude and it was just what i did right and then i did stand up and i was like oh what the fuck am i doing rolling around because it wasn't it you know i found out that that wasn't me you know like i got to a point where i was like good for me but it was like other guys were this was their life yeah you know and then once i did stand up it was just so so obvious that that was who i was and that was my life that i was like oh i'm just gonna excel at this, I feel like, if I work really hard.
00:13:51.000And you can, and you could, you know, I remember, like, especially when I first started out, not being able to figure out, like, I had pad after pad filled with these ideas that were just ridiculously stupid ideas.
00:15:18.000You look at, and you look at those, yeah, and you look at those pictures and you think, oh, man, like you're like, how did I get any pussy?
00:18:20.000Yeah, it's all what we fucking made up.
00:18:23.000I mean, like, it used to be where girls who were very fair-skinned were hot because that meant they were rich and they were indoors and fucking that was awesome.
00:18:31.000And then it was, and the, and the workers got all tan because they were outside.
00:20:40.000I mean, honestly, if you're a fucking like, you know, fighter or some shit, and you're just like, I'm going to put lines in my beard because I'm crazy to be fucking to then fine.
00:20:52.000But if you're just like a guy and you work at crate and barrel and you're just like, dude, it's fucking on with my sideburns.
00:21:16.000And then it goes back to the hunting days that men who would wear like shiny, flashy things, they would distract animals.
00:21:25.000Like they would be a problem on hunting journeys.
00:21:28.000And the same thing with men who talk too much.
00:21:31.000Like men were like, if you look at like movies where there's a hero and the hero is like someone to be looked up to, they're always very stoic.
00:21:53.000Which is like with women, the difference in the way women communicate with each other and the difference between the way men communicate with each other.
00:22:03.000Men value a guy who can keep his shit together when the chips are down.
00:22:08.000But when women would be gathering and making food and shit, when men were off being quiet and sneaking up on animals, the women would be talking all kinds of shit about the men.
00:22:18.000This motherfucker's going, he's running around out there hunting with his beads on and shit.
00:23:30.000Like Brian Holtzman, you know Brian Holtzman?
00:23:32.000Brian Holtzman had this fucking bit that he was doing about Charlie's Angels when Charlie's Angels came out and Drew Barrymore was kicking people and knocking them out.
00:26:31.000And then fucking Travis Bickel would come up, the real life Travis Bickel, and just people would be like, oh no, this is not for me.
00:26:40.000Yeah, there's those guys that everybody knows and everybody remembers that, you know, are like, you know, what you would call comics comic.
00:28:22.000You know, like we were talking about guys getting in trouble for saying things off their show.
00:28:29.000Off their show on stage as a comedian.
00:28:31.000Yeah, I remember the rumor was, I don't know if it was substantiated or not, but that ABC had told Tim Allen to stop doing stand-up while he was doing homework.
00:30:32.000A few moments in my career, the real standout eat dick moments, like there'd been some bad sets along the way, but there's a few standout, really eat plates of shit moments, you know?
00:30:59.000I mean, there might have been, plus the writers, there might have been 30 other people, and they were scattered throughout the room, maybe 50 maximum.
00:32:05.000That, to me, that's what I, like, that's why I say when I don't understand when comedians who have a show apologize for some shit they did.
00:32:20.000If you're like, yeah, you know, I mean, you know, whatever, whatever it is, fuck this, fuck that.
00:32:24.000And then you're like, oh, well, I shouldn't have said that.
00:32:26.000And you mean that and you feel bad, then fine.
00:32:28.000But the thing is, we're, you know, to be a comedian means you're somebody who people are going to go to see jokes.
00:32:34.000And if you are telling jokes and then somebody gets offended and then you say you're sorry, I didn't mean that, I shouldn't have said that, then what you're saying is you're kind of serious.
00:32:43.000You were kind of serious on stage when you said that.
00:33:13.000I was like an open micer at the Ha Ha Cafe when that shit happened.
00:33:17.000And I kind of knew Frasier Smith a little bit because he was who was hosting that night, you know?
00:33:23.000And I was like, oh, wow, Frasier was hosting that night.
00:33:27.000And when that happened, when you saw that, like, there's nobody in the right mind that would have seen what went down with Michael Richards on stage and been like, oh, no, he was joking around.
00:33:35.000Well, Michael Richards is the exact opposite because Michael Richards started out as an actor.
00:38:08.000It's like people are like, you know, my favorite, one of my favorite hours is Eddie Murphy, you know, and people are like, he should come back, he should come back.
00:38:15.000Dude, could you imagine coming back after 30 years of not doing it?
00:38:18.000And getting busted with transsexual hookers?
00:41:14.000You know, at least you being 34, you can, I mean, you kind of are watching it come to fruition as you're an adult.
00:41:22.000And you're kind of seeing all these fuck-ups happen, like the Kramer fuck-up and all these other fuck-ups, seeing them as you're becoming a successful stand-up, like, ooh, don't do that.
00:42:21.000Even if I was really politically minded and very smart and the best candidate, there's no fucking way I would get elected because I've already done the thing that buried me and somebody's got a screenshot of it.
00:43:25.000Like, if you're lying, like the scenario that you propose, if you're lying there and some chick takes a picture of your dick, that's not a fuck up, man.
00:44:05.000It was about Nixon during the Watergate administration or during the Watergate scandal.
00:44:10.000Nixon brought in a bunch of generals and was testing the waters for taking over Congress and having a coup, having like a military intervention to take over.
00:44:52.000It was also when Kent State happened, when they shot those kids that were protesting the Vietnam War.
00:44:57.000And he was constantly worried about lefties, constantly worried about liberals and the liberals taking over the lefties and the East Coast lefties.
00:45:05.000And he apparently had some crazy meeting with these generals.
00:45:10.000And this is one of the guys says, I got the impression, he said, that he was sort of testing the water with us to see whether or not there would be support, any nodding of heads, or some of these other things.
00:45:24.000One could well have come to the conclusion that here was the commander-in-chief trying to see what the reaction of the Joint Chiefs of Staff might be if he did something unconstitutional.
00:45:35.000He was trying to find out whether or not in a crunch there would be support to keep him in power.
00:45:40.000So if they were going to kick him out of power because of the Watergate thing, he was going to bring in the military.
00:45:45.000Like, he was trying to test the waters.
00:46:19.000I think the standards that people are going to be judged by are going to be very different because I don't think really bad guys are going to be able to be president in the future.
00:46:27.000I don't think a guy like Nixon will get to a point where he could be the president and not have all the dirt on him that would be revealing illuminated long before he ever got into office.
00:48:34.000There was thoughts that one of the things that could affect a president, if a president was like a real pussy chaser, was that someone could blackmail him.
00:48:43.000And that if someone had some information, like say if you hired a Soviet spy was super hot to fuck him, to fuck the president, some presidential dick, and she fucks him, and then she has some dirt on him.
00:51:15.000On suspicion of working for the illegals program spy ring under the Russian Federation's External Intelligence Agency.
00:51:25.000Chapman pleaded guilty to a charge of conspiracy to act as an agent of a foreign government without notifying the U.S. Attorney General and was deported back to Russia.
00:52:19.000No, that's that's the im no that's when the image wait what I don't know see right here is the whole birthright I'm confused that's ridiculous but but that picture's not that old that picture's a new picture it says 1932 32 to 1947 what does that mean I don't know what the fuck is that still from a movie yeah did she die maybe she must have
00:52:49.000back in the oh the life and death of her has become a symbol of the courage of the chinese people is often cited as a homily h-o-m-i-l-y of their lord i don't even know what that word is what's homily i don't know i never heard that word used okay let's google it i love the internet what a weird world we live in homily is um a religious discourse that is intended primarily for spiritual edification rather than doctrinal instruction oh fuck are you using that word
00:53:19.000for of their loyalty to communism her story is often told as an homage to the struggles endured and the sacrifices made for the cause of liberating china from the centuries of rule by foreign powers okay yeah that's one of those words that uses other words i don't know to describe it okay there's a picture of this other chick that's clearly not a real picture number two because she was from 1551 you fucks right you can't have pictures of this chick from 1551 that look like a movie still god damn it sons of bitches at least somebody draw her
00:53:49.000nice and then matahari matahari that was in 1876 but yeah but that sounds like some old old way of thinking to be like well we can't have a president that wants to fuck a lot because a spy will get him like come on it is kind of ridiculous that sounds like that sounds ridiculous but we kind of proved our own point because the top 10 throughout history we only found one one one of them was 15 one of them was
00:54:18.000legitimately hot and like i said she was russian right that's it so you're saying what there was one hot russian spy right so we kind of proved our point it's not really it's right yeah worried about yeah but all throughout human history there's only been 10 plus she was 28 what is she now that's his well no she's still hot she's still hot this was only four years ago yeah so she's 32 slinging 32 out there slinging well plus she was already caught so she's fucked yeah we know about her now maybe maybe she got a
00:54:48.000raise you know in russia they brought her back to russia she's probably goddamn hero i'm yeah where is she today let's find out if that were really a thing i think people would i mean maybe we don't know about it but people would be like raising hot spies that's true i mean that there why are there's no way we wouldn't do that dude she's even hotter than that picture there's like if you go to google images whoo yeah she was smoking look at this she's probably gonna be a maximum oh yeah totally she's here
00:55:18.000that's from that's from stuff magazine yeah she's uh got these long red gloves on this hot lingerie look at this one yeah by the way if you're a spy don't take fucking pictures like that this whole thing doesn't make sense she was pretending to not be a spy dude she's pretending to just be hot but just stay out of the fucking light okay come on son look at that that's really really sexy with the gun i mean come on jesus not a spy the
00:55:47.000picture should say under it not a spy hold it right up to her head while you bang her dirty girl that's crazy yeah there's a lot of dirty pictures of her somebody should have known yeah she was on maxim yeah see this she was on russian maxim right it's like not really maxim yeah maxim don't really count russia maxim yeah wonder where she's at today let's see anna chapman today i bet she's got a good gig somewhere in russia she's probably got a podcast she
00:56:17.000probably does one woman show explaining how she trick stupid american just by dressing sexy yeah she refuses to discuss it okay like a true spy yeah refuses
00:56:32.000to just oh interesting pretty well she's connected somehow to edwards to snowden oh wow there was a recent tweet proposing marriage to edwards snowden that's real yeah she proposed marriage to snowden she wants i want him to marry me so i can double spy spy on america from russia i spy again and again and again i'm a very private discreet person not that private she's on
00:57:02.000twitter many interviews is she on twitter i thought she just said yeah you said there's a tweet about it she's got a twitter page that's what yeah but i thought like maybe like somebody else put oh got it let's find out anna chapman twitter spies need to work on their social networking and the chapman on twitter at least to tweet alibis you can tweet alibis put up a twit pic while you're somewhere else yep if i went to her twitter page and she followed me i would panic but i'm following her are you blocked nope
00:57:32.000have you ever gotten to someone's page and found you're blocked like oh shit no no no um are you astounded by uh like the like social media has become very strange and uh like twitter and oh everything on her page is all in russian this is kind of wild yeah but yeah she's uh free and clear all sexy pictures all over the place um like uh instagram you go to
00:58:02.000like you you had a funny poet but like you're like how are you a girl and you have an instagram page and you don't have a hundred thousand followers how's that happen how's that happen i went to a girl's page and it was just her doing yoga it was her ass like her in yoga jeans she had two million fucking followers on instagram yeah i was walking by in
00:58:24.000i was in las vegas or some shit i don't know and there was a poster it was like come see instagram sensation yada yada and it was just some chick that's crazy man girls would rather be uh tens on instagram than in real life oh yeah they would be because they just want to shut the shit out of the They want the followers, and then you get the followers for having an ass.
00:58:48.000That's a good question because there was an article in one of those New York magazines that was all about this woman who was an Instagram fitness sensation.
00:58:57.000They didn't say it, but it was just because she had a fantastic ass.
00:59:09.000And they were talking about all these projects that they're putting together, and there was a media team behind her, and they were going to market her.
00:59:20.000A big, fleshy body part that carries through a lot of fat hips so that you could give birth easy and fat so that you could sustain the pregnancy.
00:59:27.000And that's fine, but then when a girl posts a picture of her from behind and it's like, you know, some quote, inspiration shit, and you're just like, no.
00:59:39.000I know they have millions of comments on their fucking thing, but I'll still comment no.
00:59:56.000You can do it, but then you're an asshole.
00:59:59.000There's nothing funnier than when you go to a girl's page, whether it's Instagram or Twitter, and there's just a plethora of images of her in sexy positions, their ass out, in her underwear and bikinis, doing selfies.
01:00:11.000And then there's a quote about men needing to respect boundaries.
01:00:15.000That's, yeah, that's something that's just like, no.
01:00:24.000That would be like if I fucking, that would be like if I took a bunch of peanut butter, put it all over my eyes and face and mouth, and then said to you, dude, why does it fucking taste like peanut butter in here?
01:00:37.000You'd be like, well, you got fucking peanut.
01:01:09.000No, but for real, when a dude's like, hey, or when you're trying to kick it with a girl, and then some other dude's like, yo, I heard that dude's a bad dude.
01:01:45.000As a matter of fact, I've been wanting, I've been trying, like, if I'm like really trying to get this girl and like she's so hot or whatever, and then and I find out she has a boyfriend and there's been situations in my life where I was like, oh, I found out a girl had a boyfriend and I found out that the boyfriend's cheating.
01:02:37.000Well, look, there are, look, and I'm not saying that women and hot women and whoever are, I mean, they're fucking, they can be great friends, but you all, if they're hot, and even if they're not, you sometimes still want to fuck them.
01:03:34.000What's weird when anybody like when a guy is like working an angle and trying really hard to like position himself as better than he like position himself as being like different than every other guy.
01:03:49.000There's a lot of guys out there that are doing really negative things.
01:03:52.000I read this one guy's fucking Twitter page the other day.
01:04:12.000But one of the things he said is he said, he said, although I still practice feminist, I still practice feminism, I no longer, what do you say, advertise myself as a feminist because I feel like it's up to women to decide whether or not I'm doing feminism correctly.
01:04:51.000I actually don't even know what to say about that.
01:04:53.000Male feminism is a very strange thing.
01:04:55.000Not male equality specialists or equality promoters, specialists, egalitarian people who only look out for the greater good of all humanity and don't gender identify, or don't, they're not, they're not gender-specific in how they think that people should have rights.
01:05:14.000And I think that's, I think equality is a beautiful thing.
01:05:18.000I mean, when it comes to how people are treated and when it comes to laws, and without a doubt, that's how it should be.
01:05:25.000But this idea of male feminism, it strikes me as a bit pandering.
01:05:32.000There's a little bit of pandering going on.
01:05:33.000There's a little bit of role-playing going on.
01:06:28.000You can be fucking a girl, a beautiful girl, and then on the TV, a commercial comes on with a beautiful girl, and you'll be like, who's that?
01:07:48.000I'm basically looking out for all women's rights, and I'm different than all women.
01:07:52.000What you don't ever find is men who, well, I guess you could find, but it's very rarely guys who are savages who identify with being a feminist.
01:08:05.000Like, it's not like studly, athletic, you know, pro-football players like, oh, I'm also a feminist.
01:09:22.000I mean, one of the reasons why guys got into comedy, I know one of the reasons what I loved about doing comedy is that all of a sudden girls liked me.
01:09:29.000Like, they didn't like me when I was a fighter.
01:09:33.000It was very rare that girls were really excited to hang out with some guy who was hanging out with sweaty dudes all day, getting kicked in the face.
01:18:47.000Yeah, it's, yeah, those inflections, those patterns that people choose.
01:18:54.000They think that this is how a comedian's supposed to talk.
01:18:56.000I'll talk like that, and then I'll be a comedian.
01:18:59.000Like, I don't know if you did it, but a lot of comedians do it when they're starting out.
01:19:03.000I had a real problem where I would mimic other comedians, and I would catch myself sounding like a- Well, if you watch too much, or if you're like, you know, in the beginning, you're like, I like that guy, you know, and then you go on stage, but you figure it out if you do it enough.
01:19:46.000And I'll start sending him like debunk things.
01:19:48.000Do you know that guy like disagrees with Nobel Prize winning scientists that he misquotes their work?
01:19:54.000And I'll send him like all this fucking, Brian and I got in this huge argument once because he kept quoting this asshole that he had on his podcast.
01:20:01.000So in the middle of the conversation, because I saved this on my phone because I was tired of having this conversation with him, I just start reading off all the different things where this guy has lied and said things wrong.
01:21:05.000But along the way, he started promoting this type of coffee that he has that's what's called mycotoxin-free.
01:21:12.000This is a long story that has been beaten to death on this podcast.
01:21:16.000So I don't want to get into it too much.
01:21:19.000But after that guy, there was so much misinformation that I felt responsible for because I put it out and I repeated the things that he had told me.
01:23:01.000He's a scientist, essentially, in a lot of ways.
01:23:04.000I want to say he's a guy who's very educated and intellectually curious.
01:23:09.000And so he tries to figure out what it is about people that makes them gravitate towards these unlikely scenarios that they believe that the government is spraying chemicals in the sky.
01:23:21.000And all you hear about this guy is that he's a paid disinformation agent, which I know not to be true.
01:25:07.000But if somebody wanted to find dirt on you, if they wanted to dig deep, you were the president, they could find something fucked up about you.
01:25:14.000Well, in finding that fucked up thing about you, that one fucked up thing, they could decide, well, Chris DeLeah, he got drunk once and jerked off in this girl's hair and you fucking asshole.
01:25:25.000They could decide he is a chronic masturbator in girls' hair while they're drunk.
01:25:33.000Everything else is just setting himself up so he could jerk off of people's hair.
01:25:37.000Like, they could decide that one thing that you've done, you made a who you are all the time.
01:25:44.000They'll find one aspect of your personality that, you know, like, maybe you did this once, or maybe you ran a red light, and they'll just say, he's a fucking reckless driver.
01:27:17.000Yeah, neither do I. But Tony Hinchcliffe does.
01:27:20.000And Hinchcliffe was the one that told me that Tony Stewart is known for being this really super aggressive driver.
01:27:26.000So now I'm reading all this stuff online, and these people are just bringing up all these times in the past where he's clipped cars, or he's yelled at people, or he's hit people.
01:27:38.000He's a maniac, and they're concentrating all on this, the negative aspects of this guy.
01:27:46.000I mean, I don't understand exactly what it is.
01:27:49.000And it's because they want to believe that he hit Red.
01:27:51.000They want to believe he hit him on purpose.
01:27:52.000They want to believe that he hit the gas when he's near the guy because he knew the ass in the car would kick out.
01:27:57.000And if the ass in the car kicked out, the guy would get run over.
01:28:00.000Like, it's just one of those things where when something happens, if something goes wrong, people will find the one thing and then concentrate wholly on that.
01:28:14.000Instead of like, I mean, this is pure speculation because I don't know exactly what happened.
01:28:19.000Instead of, you know, maybe he did drive aggressive and knocked that guy on the wall and the guy got out of his fucking car and the guy was on the track yelling at him.
01:31:56.000Do you show up at like weird spots and do sets on?
01:31:58.000Ever since I started getting into clubs like a few years ago and just being able to go up wherever I want, you know, I was like, I just was like, why would I go play Buzz Coffee?
01:32:32.000How many times have you fucking heard that?
01:32:33.000There's a lot of alt rooms are real weird in that like alt rooms that like almost like everyone's making an agreement to put out as little energy as possible.
01:32:40.000And then if you come along and you've got you're enthusiastic, you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
01:34:37.000I don't know his name, but he was at the, you know, at the comedy store?
01:34:39.000They'll be like, fucking, you'll be, literally like Jim Carrey will show up and then somebody will be like, hey, will you be in my documentary?
01:34:47.000And you're like, like, there's just fucking derelicts there.
01:36:56.000You'll have like 20 people in the crowd, and at any given time, one person will be paying attention to the story, but they'll lose you, and then a new person will pay attention.
01:41:10.000I go in there, towels and shit, picking up all the sheets, putting the puke into a big puke, like one of those little stork things that the stork characters do.
01:41:21.000My dad, first time I threw up, when I was a kid, my dad tells a story where he's like, you know, you don't know what's happening to your body.
01:42:13.000But it was like, I just thought this funny thing about like the first time that that shit happens with you as like you're like, that's scary as shit.
01:42:23.000Yeah, it is scary as shit the first time.
01:43:08.000Someone told me if you have some funky shit inside your stomach, if you eat raw garlic, raw garlic apparently destroys a lot of bad bacteria.
01:45:27.000World's first portable E-NOS, and its iOS Android mobile app enables users to determine quality, freshness of meat, poultry, and fish, and whether it's gone bad and could potentially cause food portions.
01:47:06.000The Peres story began when the team who created the device collaborated with scientists from Kaunas University of Technology in Lithuania.
01:47:17.000After more than a year of research and development, the team has now created a second working prototype of the Peres device.
01:47:28.000PARES works by taking a sample of the air from around the pork, beef, poultry, or fish.
01:47:34.000By detecting the concentration of volatile organic compounds and other gases in the sample and adjusting them according to temperature and humidity, it calculates the freshness and quality of the food product.
01:47:46.000Using sensor array and Bluetooth technology, data are transmitted directly to a smartphone or tablet for calculation of sample data.
01:47:54.000Users immediately put up their phones to help them make an intrans choice.
01:47:58.000It smells your food and safety of their pork, beef, poultry, and fish.
01:50:54.000He's actually going to throw a party in Columbus and have a big concert and donate like $35,000 to charity and start a non-profit to deal with some two.
01:52:47.000A 32-page official training manual titled The Care and Training of Your Pet Rock was included with instructions on how to properly raise and care for one's new pet rock, notably lacking instructions for feeding, bathing, etc.
01:53:03.000So if it costs five bucks, Homeboy made a lot of money.
01:55:07.000Or you're at home and you've got your dick in your hand and you're talking to your girlfriend on the phone and she's being an asshole to you and she won't come over and have sex with you.
01:55:15.000So you just scream because you're drunk.
01:55:18.000You scream some horrible upsetting that you don't mean at all.
01:55:21.000And the next day it's on the internet.
01:56:09.000I don't believe it got out publicly, but I do believe that the cops were saying that Mel Gibson was calling them Jews and saying that the Jews control Hollywood.
01:56:19.000And also his dad is like a Holocaust denier.
01:58:53.000Do you think that the average person could ever understand what it would be like to be scrutinized on just the level that you're scrutinized on?
01:59:00.000Just being on a show, having people talk shit about you online, reading Twitter pages, communicating with seeing people talk about you and just overwhelming.
01:59:12.000It's hard to not respond to every single one.
02:02:31.000The problem is if you get anytime publicly, you get into any sort of an altercation.
02:02:36.000Like, this is one of the things that I learned about the Carlos Mencia situation when the thing with Carlos went down, which if I had to do it again.
02:05:04.000And they were talking that they were, and when they were saying that he was a bigger star than me at the time, and Steely was, especially when it came to movies and television shows, because he had Mindamancia.
02:05:16.000And it was after I was done doing Fear Factor.
02:05:40.000There wasn't just like, there was a few minor instances of plagiarism or there was parallel thinking or two guys did jokes about a similar subject and you think that one guy came up with the other guy's bit.
02:05:53.000He was one of the worst plagiarists I've ever seen.
02:06:03.000He would bump guys when they were headlining, like they would be headlining for the first time, like Brad Williams or Brad Williams or was it I forget which guy it was, but his first gig headlining, Mencia shows up, does a guest spot in front of him for 45 minutes.
02:06:42.000But my point is that the negative stuff that I got from that, like the people that, when two people see, or when two people are fighting, and then all the public gets to chime in their opinion, then you just open yourself up to this attack.
02:07:00.000Even if you're right, and I was right.
02:07:03.000Most people were on my side, but most people doesn't mean everybody.
02:07:07.000If there's a million people that were on my side, there was 300,000 that were angry at me.
02:07:12.000And the 300,000, it slowly eroded to zero.
02:09:44.000Years and years and years and years and years and years and years of people fucking yelling at him and everywhere he goes, he fucking thief.
02:09:51.000And then they found out that he wasn't really Mexican, so the Mexicans got mad at him.
02:10:48.000But also in this time we live in now, it's all soundbite shit.
02:10:53.000And when you're asking somebody a question about like I did an interview for HuffPost and it was like they asked me about something and then they took a bite of that and they put it onto the headline and it's like, now fucking everyone, you know what I mean?
02:11:05.000Everyone's like what the fuck did you say here?
02:11:27.000And the ability to take things in quotes, like I've had people take quotes that I said like on a Twitter, like just a Twitter joke and write a whole blog about it.
02:12:39.000Like I don't, I don't like, you know, I don't, I'm not into sports, you know?
02:12:43.000And I'll, I, when the World Cup was on, I was just tweeting about how stupid sports were, but I was making jokes, you know, and it's like, if, look, if you're a kid and you're coming up and sports is your way out, that's fucking awesome.
02:13:04.000But they were like, oh, fucking sports don't matter.
02:13:06.000I did this thing where I would make like quick videos of like where I was be at a bar and this World Cup would be going on and then some people would cheer and I would be like, yeah, it doesn't matter.
02:13:45.000We were eating dinner at this place, and the World Cup was on in the background, and there was these annoying white guys that were screaming whenever the USA won or the USA scored a goal.
02:13:55.000They were like jumping around and they're high-fiving each other.
02:13:58.000It was just like, it was like there's nothing wrong with rooting for a team, but there's something artificial about the way they were doing it.
02:14:33.000It's like, I can't, I don't like anybody who gets too in the sauce.
02:14:40.000And just like, they're just like, oh, fuck yeah, man.
02:14:44.000And it's like, that's not your life, dude.
02:14:47.000But I have a particular fascination about the World Cup because I find it very interesting that soccer gets, it doesn't move the needle at all outside of the World Cup.
02:14:57.000Like, nobody gives a shit about soccer in America.
02:15:00.000Remember when they tried to sell David Beckham?
02:15:02.000They brought David Beckham to L.A. and they paid some fucking ungodly amount of money to have him.
02:17:57.000Here's a flaw with that problem, though.
02:17:59.000Because what if, like, one team scored a run because they got four hits?
02:18:04.000Like, they got a guy on first, then another guy got a single, he got on second, then another guy got on third, and then another guy came along and had a single, and then he brought in the third baseman comes in.
02:18:15.000But if you watch, like, a home run, like, that would, like, discourage home runs because that's only one hit.
02:19:18.000That's where you, that's when, when I, when I listen to you or talk to you or whatever it is, whenever I hear you, I always think, how do you, just before you even knew me, I would be like, how do, how does Joe Rogan remember that much shit?
02:20:44.000If you wanted to just go back and kind of look at Shakespeare as like the origins of literature and the origins of storytelling, then it becomes interesting.
02:21:14.000I have like maybe four or five Lenny Bruce pictures in my house because I think that Lenny Bruce is, I think he was the godfather of it all.
02:21:21.000He was the reason why we could do what we did.
02:21:41.000And they were just joke, like almost like street jokes.
02:21:45.000And they would put together an act and that act would never change.
02:21:48.000And then Lenny Bruce came along and Lenny Bruce started talking about things that he saw, the behavior people had, hypocrisy, religion, racism.
02:21:59.000And everybody's like, what the fuck is this guy doing?
02:22:02.000And people would come to see him and they would be blown away.
02:22:05.000No one in the 50s and the 60s was talking like that.
02:22:08.000No one was communicating the way Lenny Bruce was.
02:22:10.000And he lit the fire that created George Carlin and Richard Pryor and all these different guys.
02:22:16.000I think he was the original source of American stand-up comedy.
02:23:25.000Six fix, five nicks, four clacks, three guineas, and one whop.
02:23:28.000You almost punched me out, didn't you?
02:23:31.000Well, I was just trying to make a point, and that is that it's the suppression of the word that gives it the power, the violence, the viciousness.
02:23:39.000Dick, if President Kennedy would just go on television and say, I'd like to introduce you to all the niggers in my cabinet, and if he just say, nigger, nigger, nigger, nigger, nigger, every nigger he saw, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie, nigger, nigger, nigger, niggered, nigger, till nigger didn't mean anything.
02:24:47.000And that bit, boy, it's all about the context of the times because that bit, like, if you did that today, like, boy, you'd have to do a way better job of piecing it together.
02:27:50.000That's a great fucking thing, man, because that whole thing of like having the right representation, like the whole situation that I went through with Gersh, where they were trying to get me to apologize to Mancia.
02:28:01.000Yeah, you don't have to worry about that if you got a guy in your corner for fucking 12 years already.
02:28:07.000Imagine if Gersh was my guy and they were telling me that it was the only people I had representing me and they were telling me I had to apologize to a criminal.
02:28:15.000That's the sneaky part about this business, right?
02:28:17.000It's like dealing with all the people that sell it.
02:30:13.000But bombing is just the whole thing that you've been working for is to build up your confidence so that you can get to this point where you finally feel like you're worthy of staying alive.
02:30:21.000And then one bad set after Chris DeLia.
02:30:27.000But that's the test the universe gives you.
02:30:30.000We were talking about Scott Shore, who's Mitzi Shore's, I guess, oldest son.
02:36:09.000Well, that's you know, Kinnison is an interesting thing because when I think about Kinnison, I would have loved to have seen what the fuck would have happened to him as a comic.
02:36:26.000He's the best example that I give to young comics when they want to talk about the perils of fame and what can happen to you when you stop writing, when you stop working on your sets, you're no longer trying to hone it as an art form.
02:36:42.000He was doing blow and break and being this superstar.
02:36:47.000If you listen to Louder Than Hell, you go watch his first HBO special, watch that stuff, the good stuff, and then watch the subsequent specials.
02:37:37.000Like he would have some guy on stage, and the guy would tell him about a heartbreak that he had, and then he would bring up a phone, and he would call the girl from the stage and scream at her.
02:38:08.000Like, the wind that carried his sails was over.
02:38:12.000But during that 1986 year, Maron has the best fucking stories about Kinnison because Maron used to work at the comedy store when Kinnison was coming up.
02:38:36.000Anybody who's listening to this, if you want to hear more of it, Mark Maron's episode of this podcast, when Mark Maron was on this podcast, I'm sure it's easy to find.
02:38:45.000He told some fucking awesome stories about Kinnison.
02:38:56.000But he was there at the darkest moments of The Beast, like when Kinnison was just in time anywhere, it would be just the 80s and I'd go to the comedy store.
02:40:26.000That's something, if I could give advice to young comics, don't lose the love as a fan because sometimes comics, they become comics, and then it's all about them.
02:40:36.000It's all about getting better, and it's all about them killing and not about other people.
02:40:42.000And then it becomes all about like, you know, like you sort of dissect.
02:42:21.000And so I would feel lazy if I didn't hustle like these guys did.
02:42:25.000And I developed a lot of my work ethic from being friends with these guys because they were hustlers because they were constantly getting shit done.
02:42:33.000And if you're around guys that constantly get shit done, it becomes sort of contagious.
02:42:39.000And I think comics, they tend to be, a lot of us tend to be very insolent.
02:42:46.000Not well, the best way to look at it is you concentrate too much on yourself to the point where you avoid other things being good that don't have anything to do with you.
02:51:24.000Use the code word J-R-E for your special bonus offer, $110 bonus offer, which includes a digital scale, which you are not allowed to use for mushrooms.
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