In this episode, the boys talk about bulletproof coffee and how it s actually pretty good for you. Also, we talk about the benefits of a glass or two of wine a day and why you should drink like a grown up. Guests: Joe Rogan, comedian, writer, podcaster, and podcaster. Special thanks to our sponsor, Bulletproof coffee. Thanks also to our patron, Tom Papa, for sponsoring this episode. If you like the pod, please consider leaving us a five star rating and a review on Apple Podcasts by clicking the link below. Thank you so much for being a part of this podcast and supporting it. It means a lot to us and we hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoyed making it! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. The opinions expressed in this episode are our own, not those of our companies, unless otherwise specified. We do not own the rights to any music used in the podcast. All credit given to artists, labels, websites, etc. or any other third parties mentioned in the show. This episode was produced, produced, and edited by us. I am not responsible for any of the music used, except where credit is given to third-party producers. Our apologies for any other credit given, other than those given, unless stated, is given or received by our clients, is not in accordance with permission. Please do not claim ownership of any other than that of any third party or other third party services. except that which is owed to any other person s credit or other than their credit or compensation. . We have no such credit given or compensation or compensation, other such person(s). We are not compensated for any such credit, otherwise received or compensation is owed. in any way. by third party compensation, except as said in this podcast or such other person( ) we are not in any such thing. - We are working with a third party. , or other such thing, etc., - Thank you for your support is being compensated, etc.. , etc., etc. Thank you, thank you for the support or support is appreciated, etc, etc... -- Thank you. -- thank you, of course if you like this podcast, please reach out to me.
00:00:37.000The guy who invented it was a guy named Rob Wolf, but the guy who popularized it is kind of a nutty dude that had a lot of false claims about the benefits of it.
00:00:47.000If you want some of this stevia stuff, this is actually pretty yummy, but you've got to use very little of it.
00:00:52.000It's very sweet, but it has no sugar in it.
00:06:26.000He wasn't a comedian, he was just an Irish guy.
00:06:28.000Naturally funny, you know like naturally Irish, those guys that could just curse like nobody could and just hilarious.
00:06:35.000And the two of us would always get together at these parties and we would just screw around and everyone would be laughing and you know we were riffing together and it was great.
00:06:43.000And so I went away and came back one time in college and I was high.
00:06:49.000And we met up at a party and he just ran circles around me.
00:11:36.000Did you feel like by the time you were 30 when you started, like you kind of were done with all of figuring out who you were, kind of weirdness, or were you...
00:12:04.000And as a comic, especially when you abandon your material, like you have an act, you put out a special, and then you toss all your material out.
00:12:25.000Sort of cycle or developmental period where you go through, you put out the special, you hone it to as fine an edge as you think that you can, and then you release it, and then you go, okay, let's start all over again.
00:12:41.000And when you're starting all over again, there's a lot of thinking involved.
00:12:43.000That's why those old guys that never wrote, there was a period...
00:14:04.000And at least that was like a CD on Warner Brothers, like a real CD. Like, I can go back and listen to recordings before that, and they're fucking god-awful.
00:14:34.000I mean, I remember really clearly, like, struggling and trying to put it together and then going to see someone really good and being like, fuck, I'm never getting there.
00:15:23.000I don't know why they're laughing at this.
00:15:26.000Maybe it's my funny face when I say it, you know what I mean?
00:15:29.000It's like, to really kind of look at it and analyze it, it's like, this is, I'm kind of cheating 80% of the time.
00:15:39.000Well, that's why being inspired by your peers, it's one of the good things about being in a big comedy community like New York or LA, is that you get to be around all these high-level comics on a regular basis, and you sort of can compare yourself to them.
00:15:54.000This is why I'm psyched to be here, and I really am very happy to be here, because I've been a fan of yours for a long, long time, and we never really hung out.
00:18:06.000I mean, but what, you know, what I might think is good, I might have a higher standard than some, I mean, I have had people tell me, this guy's really funny, you should see him, and I'd go, blah!
00:18:16.000This guy's fucking dog shit, this is terrible, I can't watch this.
00:18:47.000There's something to be learned even from that.
00:18:49.000That's one of the things that I always used to say about Carlos Mencia is that I never understood why people were laughing, but it was amazing the energy that he put out.
00:19:56.000Or the worst is that when you're in showcase clubs, you're one of like eight guys that night, and it's like, oh, they're telling me I gotta go.
00:20:30.000What we were talking about earlier where you were saying that because it's so easy to criticize comedians these days and so many people go after people for controversial jokes.
00:20:39.000You were talking about all these young guys you're seeing on stage.
00:20:43.000Young gals as well are saying jokes, but they're like, before they say it, they have to say, look, you know, I am not racist.
00:22:45.000Of course, but as a comedian in a club doing what you're doing, the only way it's going to go away is if you don't fight it, if you don't resist it, which is difficult.
00:22:55.000But if they come at you and say, you're racist for saying this, the only comment is, I'm a comedian, and then that's it.
00:23:23.000I mean, fighting back is important, I think.
00:23:26.000Or at least stating your mind, speaking your opinion.
00:23:30.000But this idea of apologizing for jokes, fuck off, man.
00:23:34.000Those people, the people who write about it, who are in the audience and taking offense and writing about it, they, to me, are much more offensive than a comedian.
00:23:42.000The comedian, his job is to make a joke.
00:23:50.000If you're in the audience and you're calling someone a racist or you're calling someone a misogynist or whatever label, you are much more violent than the clown up on stage.
00:24:09.000And violence is close to the term because I did a show for our good friend Greg Fitzsimmons.
00:24:15.000It was like a fundraiser thing for the school thing.
00:24:18.000And I was talking about, I have this joke in my act, where I say I live in LA, it's a horrible school district that we live in, and I either had to pay for school or pay for guns and ammo.
00:24:29.000And my kids have no skills, so I pay for school.
00:24:32.000And the only rule I have with school, if I'm going to pay for school, is it cannot be predominantly Asian.
00:25:31.000So I just stop and lean on the stool and I said, where am I going with this?
00:25:38.000I'm pointing out that Asian families work harder than our traditional American white families.
00:25:46.000They work harder and hold their kids to a higher standard and therefore they're excelling more in sports and they're excelling more in schools because of how they're raised and held to these high standards and that they are actually doing better for their families than we are by giving our kids a free pass and making sure that they have a good time.
00:26:04.000But of course, this all would have been done through jokes and would have been a much more enjoyable experience for the rest of the audience if you had shut up.
00:26:13.000I said, I'm sorry, what part, just so I understand, What race are you?
00:27:26.000You're sort of racist against your own kids.
00:27:27.000There was so much fun in a time when you could just talk about each other and enjoy it.
00:27:33.000Like, really be like, you know, you'd be like, we were Italian and my friends were Irish and everybody had their things and you were celebrating it.
00:27:42.000My parents' generation really celebrated it, you know?
00:27:45.000Now you can't even say what they are without it being perceived as awful.
00:27:51.000I heard this Mexican lady yell at me once.
00:27:53.000I had this joke about the UFO that supposedly crashed in Roswell, New Mexico.
00:28:00.000In 1947, the cover of the Roswell Times, or whatever the newspaper was, I actually have it framed in my house, the cover of this newspaper.
00:28:09.000It said, you know, there was a headline that was like, flying disc recovered.
00:28:29.000They said they had a crashed UFO and alien bodies.
00:28:32.000And then the next day they came out and they printed in the paper, or they came out and had a press release that said, I don't remember how this joke goes, it was a long time ago.
00:28:41.000They said, no, sorry, it was just a weather balloon.
00:28:43.000And I said, well, what about the aliens?
00:31:26.000But this whole thing, like there are intelligent people, though, that kind of provoke this, don't you think?
00:31:32.000Like there's people writing editorials and educated people who want to control human behavior by semantics, by kind of, they're going to set up their own rules and you're going to have to abide by them.
00:31:46.000Well, there's a lot of people that are unhappy and they have a green light to start talking shit.
00:31:49.000And there's also people that are bloggers that are looking for a subject that they can legitimately find a reason to attack.
00:31:56.000And they might not, if they weren't bloggers, they might not have even focused on it.
00:32:00.000But because of the fact that it's a subject, it's like, do I really give a fuck about Kim Kardashian?
00:32:19.000I mean, you can't fault them in some ways because it is what they do, but there's a really asinine viewpoint when you're looking at jokes and you're trying to pretend that this person is in court giving an affidavit and these are their actual thoughts on these subjects.
00:32:43.000Well, do you remember when Patrice O'Neal, he was on this, I think it was a Fox News show, and it was back when Opie and Anthony got fired, or they got suspended, I guess.
00:32:51.000And he said, and it was a really important point, he said, jokes that you are offended by and jokes that you love all come from the same place.
00:33:46.000And if someone had been in the audience YouTubing that in the beginning when it was eating dick on stage, he would have looked like an asshole.
00:33:58.000And not only that, but then the joke gets released, it gets online, which is really kind of a violation of what a comic is doing by working out a set.
00:34:07.000If you see someone at the cellar, if you see someone at the comedy store at the improv, Most of the time, most of the time, you see a comedian like you or like me, we're working out stuff.
00:34:21.000When you see it on Comedy Central or if you see it in a headline club, you see it at the Irvine Improv on a weekend, then you're seeing essentially a finished product.
00:34:30.000But all that other stuff is like, that's how bits get worked on.
00:35:54.000He had this joke that he did on stage at the Cellar where he said that all this Ferguson stuff is really starting to fuck with my personal life.
00:36:05.000And he said, no, all these protests are really starting to fuck with my personal life.
00:36:09.000He goes, the other day I'm having sex with this black chick.
00:36:14.000And he goes, hey, let's not bring politics into the bedroom.
00:36:20.000It's a fucking funny joke, man, but it was too soon, and some woman got up and yelled out, that shit ain't funny, and she started tweeting about it, and I went to her Twitter page and just fucking followed it like a hawk, because I thought it was fascinating,
00:36:36.000and she was getting all these people that were, you know, social justice warrior activists that were going to protest at the We're going to show up at his clubs.
00:40:58.000I think like what you were saying about Tosh and what we were saying about Jeff Ross, like once you know what they do, you just have to know what they do.
00:41:05.000And you know, there's going to be people that complain, but it doesn't matter.
00:41:59.000When it was his time for the show, guys in tuxedos are walking around, security guys are hanging out, old school guys with like, you know, Gel in their hair.
00:46:07.000And I was backstage, because I was a security guard, and I was working in this backstage area where I got to see Dangerfield walking around behind the stage with his bathrobe on and his slippers.
00:47:34.000That's like, you know, it's so weird to bring up his name because the context is weird now, but Cosby went through He would just come out in sweatpants and a thing with socks.
00:49:45.000Yeah, he just had this whole theory and he connected with other celebrities where he thinks Hollywood's just done with him so they throw him under the bus.
00:49:57.000Charlie Sheen was on TV talking about smoking rocks and then from then he went to get a deal with FX that netted him somewhere in the neighborhood of 500 million dollars.
00:50:55.000Meanwhile, you guys fucked up the TV business, you dumbasses.
00:50:58.000They tried to do that deal with a bunch of other shows.
00:51:01.000They tried to do it with George Lopez, and it fizzled out.
00:51:04.000What they did is, if you get past a certain amount of episodes, they automatically pick it up for 100. Right, they set it at 10. Yeah, if you get past 10, they automatically pick it up for the back 90, which is insane.
00:51:33.000They had, but then our boy Russell saved it.
00:51:37.000Russell Peters started doing shows with him and saved it because Russell's an awesome comedian and started interviewing Charlie and being funny while he was interviewing him.
00:51:46.000So Russell would crack some jokes, ask some questions, crack some more jokes, and everybody was entertained by it.
00:51:52.000And then Charlie could tell his crazy hooker stories in the context of like a showbiz set.
00:56:41.000There's only one Asian who can get that.
00:56:42.000Everybody, whatever you are, you think they don't want.
00:56:45.000But if you can create something, and that something is popular, and that something is sellable, and then people are buying it, and everybody loves it.
00:56:52.000One of the beautiful things about being a comic is that you can prove it on your own.
00:56:56.000If you develop a following and you go on stage and you start killing it on the road and everybody wants to come see you, they want to do a show with Tom Papa.
00:57:04.000They're like, Tom, what are we going to do?
00:57:05.000How do we get a piece of this money, Tom?
00:58:43.000His wife is on board, though, so it almost seems like maybe they're just drug addicts together instead of being a crazy thing, because the fact that she's not like, my husband's going crazy, they might just be up and meth and stuff.
00:58:55.000Hard to both get on the same page with that.
01:00:26.000I ran into this gal once at the comedy store back in the day with her new boyfriend that was one of the Playboy bunnies that lived at the house.
01:00:41.000You know, those stories where people have that sort of a situation where, you know, you're getting paid by some guy and there's like some money being exchanged.
01:02:16.000Yeah, not only that, it's just sexy women.
01:02:19.000I mean, if he was wearing a shirt with a bunch of He-Men Masters of the Universe on it, you know, Tarzan with his long flowing locks swinging from...
01:02:31.000If that girl, if the girl interviewing him for whatever reason, if the roles were reversed, if he was the interviewer and she was the scientist and she had a shirt on, like a bowling shirt with a bunch of studly bodybuilder dudes on, it would be funny.
01:06:35.000They're not using, like, CGI this time around, or they're using all, like, old school, like, you know, puppets and, like, how they used to do it.
01:09:55.000There's plenty of goddamn songs in this thing, and I'm not buying something else.
01:09:58.000And if I took a MP3 file that was, say...
01:10:01.000Recorded at 128 kilobits per second or whatever, or twice that, and played both of them, I really doubt most of us would even care or hear the difference in it at all.
01:10:12.000Well, you know what does matter, though, is really good headphones.
01:11:04.000It's interesting, the driver thing, because Beats, when they were still together with Dr. Dre and Beats, you know, they used their own special driver.
01:11:11.000A lot of people complained that it was really bassy and too much bass.
01:11:15.000Now that they broke up, I just got a new pair, and it's completely different.
01:11:19.000It doesn't even seem like the same headphones, even though it's almost exactly the same headphones I used to have.
01:11:25.000They look the same, but it doesn't sound the same.
01:11:27.000Right, and they're Bluetooth now, so you just have these awesome headphones.
01:15:00.000They have an app on the iPhone where it measures, uses the flash from the camera, and it pulses on your finger and actually measures the heartbeats.
01:15:10.000From reading with the camera lens and reading the light on your finger.
01:16:26.000Have you fucked with the S5? You're all Apple.
01:16:28.000Have you fucked with the Galaxy S5? No, but I've heard a lot of complaints about the S5, especially with the thumbprint sensor is not really the best.
01:19:00.000I have a great tip I just found out that it's really scary, is that turn off this thing.
01:19:06.000If you have your phone up, and you go up like that, and you have that quick menu, say you lose your phone, somebody picks it up, they put it in airplane mode so you can't find your phone, they steal your phone, so there's no way for the Find Your Phone app to find you.
01:19:21.000So you need to turn off this swipe up menu, because that's what they do.
01:19:27.000Like, if you leave a phone in a taxi, the taxi guy goes...
01:20:23.000If I can't find my phone, I'll go on my laptop and make it play a sound, and I'll find my phone underneath the couch or something like that.
01:20:38.000There's also another app I recommend called Secret, which is another one that I put on all my phones and my laptops and stuff.
01:20:44.000And what it is, it's a program that's always running that does the same kind of thing, but you could also turn on your webcam and take photos.
01:20:50.000So if somebody stole your laptop, they won't even know that you're just sitting there filming them, getting their GPS, get every single key type that they type in.
01:20:57.000Or your girlfriend can put that shit on your phone and catch you beaten off.
01:24:30.000There's a lot of time involved in being a human being that takes away from work that you could be doing that actually makes you more money.
01:24:39.000So when people say, oh, but you're giving away X amount of percent of your income.
01:24:43.000Yeah, but I'm making more money because I'm thinking more and I'm doing more and I don't have to sit in front of my fucking computer paying bills for hours every night.
01:30:49.000Tom Papa Incorporated, doing the radio show, doing the TV stuff, doing the stand-up stuff, managing all this stuff, taking care of the family, taking care of everybody, all these human beings, doing all this.
01:31:00.000And I'm like, if I don't start smoking weed, I'm going to literally turn into IBM. Seriously.
01:31:22.000And sometimes those ideas are great jokes, or great ideas are great bits, but there's stuff that comes to me when I'm high where I'm like, this is just a gift by the universe.
01:31:40.000I mean, that's like a famous quote by Carl Sagan.
01:31:43.000Carl Sagan had a famous quote about...
01:31:56.000I'm convinced that there are genuine and valid levels of perception available with cannabis and probably with other drugs which are, through the defects of our society and our educational system, unavailable to us without such drugs.
01:32:28.000Neil deGrasse Tyson, like, you know, in making that show, he's taking so much shit from creationists and from fucking people that, you should show the other side as well.
01:32:39.000How about having a creationist debate you upon your program?
01:35:05.000But when I write all this shit during shows and stuff where I have an idea that I don't want to forget, most of what it is is just really quick cliff notes.
01:35:16.000Or when I have my notebook that I use for shows, I just write the same things down over and over again.
01:42:52.000There's a couple companies, Traeger, Yoder, Green Mountain Grills is the one we have, and what they are is they take these hardwood pellets.
01:43:01.000Now, if you say if you buy this table that is made out of oak, and someone had to saw this table down, and when you're sawing it, it creates a lot of sawdust.
01:43:10.000They take that sawdust and they compress it, and the natural sugars, just in compressing it, make these things stick together into pellets.
01:43:18.000And you can take the pellets, you kind of break them in your hand.
01:43:21.000It's not like a hard piece of wood, but it is a hard wood.
01:43:24.000And so you take these pellets, you pour them into this bucket, and it's super efficient.
01:43:29.000Just like a small box, you know, like maybe two foot square, of these pellets will last for fucking hours and hours of cooking.
01:43:38.000And it regulates the temperature perfectly, and you can grill on it.
01:43:59.000Then turn it back on again, and it takes a couple minutes, it kicks on, it heats up really quickly, tastes delicious, I love cooking on it.
01:44:06.000They have an app now that you can just tell you what your temperature is on it.
01:44:11.000They also have a thing that you plug into the meat, like a meat thermometer, and it registers on the thing so you can tell exactly what temperature your food is when it's done.
01:47:39.000There's a guy named Steve Rinella, and he has a show called Meat Eater.
01:47:43.000It's on the Sportsman's channel, and he's taken me on, he took me on my first hunt, and then I started going hunting with a bunch of different people ever since then.
01:47:50.000Yeah, it's like, for the last two years.
01:48:44.000There's a lot of debate about whether or not it's humane to create foie gras.
01:48:50.000Objectively speaking, it is kind of fucked up that you take this duck and you stick his mouth into a tube and then you force feed him and that's what makes their liver swell.
01:48:58.000However, the reality is when you go to these foie gras places, when they have these farms, when it's time for the ducks to feed, they all get close to that feeder.
01:49:11.000They probably don't want you to grab them roughly and stick their neck on it, but the best way to do it is to not force feed them.
01:49:19.000The best way to do it is to give them an abundance of food, but you're going to get a smaller liver than if you just pour it down their throat.
01:49:27.000They just don't have the same, they don't have gag reflexes like we do.
01:49:31.000I mean, I'm sure they don't like being grabbed and have their mouth stuck into a tube, but they also don't like being killed.
01:49:38.000There's no humane, there's no nice way to kill and eat meat.
01:49:43.000Well, there's a humane way to treat them while they're alive, and that's where the debate lies.
01:49:47.000But when the animal rights people pass that legislation, you've got to realize the agenda of PETA and animal rights people, they don't even want you eating eggs.
01:49:58.000Do you know PETA on their website has eggs listed as a chicken's period?
01:50:04.000Do you really want to eat a chicken's period?
01:53:00.000California's Attorney General on Wednesday filed notice that her office twat...
01:53:05.000We'll appeal a federal judge's decision that overturned the state's two-year ban on the sales of fogwa, a delicacy made from fatty duck and geese liver.
01:53:15.000California outlawed fogwa sales and production in 2004, but the ban didn't take place until 2012. Proponents of the ban say forced feeding of ducks and geese to enlarge their livers amount to animal cruelty.
01:53:30.000Critics of the ban say it infringes upon culinary freedom, effectively turning...
01:53:43.000California has the right to prevent the commerce in such a cruel and inhumane product.
01:53:48.000Look, all meat products are cruel and humane.
01:53:51.000You're going to have to go through every fucking single Taco Bell and take out all their All their beef, all their pork, all their chicken, every Burger King, every McDonald's, every KFC, that is all animals that are treated far more cruel than these expensive duck and geese.
01:54:18.000It's not like, you know, this idea that this is like a uniquely cruel thing, and that if you ban this, all the other things that you see are not as bad.
01:54:27.000No, all the other things you see are way worse.
01:54:30.000They cut chickens' beaks off when they're babies so that they don't peck each other's eyeballs off because they're in such close quarters stuffed into these little cages.
01:54:49.000You should have an allotted amount of land that you have to own for a certain amount of chickens, a certain amount of cows, a certain amount of beef.
01:54:56.000But then you're going to have problems with coyotes.
01:54:58.000Because I've had two chickens get killed by coyotes and one by my dog.
01:57:33.000It was a good core idea of Seinfeld's that when married couples get in fights, these fights will last forever because you're not really giving in and solving the problem.
01:57:48.000But if you have a friend, it happened with him.
01:57:50.000Him and his wife were in a fight and he had a friend over and he said, Jerry said to him, will you please listen to both our sides and you tell us who's right and who's wrong.
01:57:59.000And the friend listened to him and said, you're right and she's wrong, whatever.
01:58:02.000And he thought, this is a funny thing for a show, for married couples that have these fights that last their whole marriage.
01:58:09.000Have a marriage ref weigh in and say whether it's right or wrong.
01:58:15.000At its core, it's a pretty good idea, but then there's so many moving...
01:58:19.000It was part reality, then it was part talk show, then you had three celebrities weighing in and giving their opinion on it, and then it just became too many moving parts.
01:58:32.000Because especially a lot of celebrities will pretend they have an opinion that's different than they really have, just in order to be...
01:58:39.000Like to get good social brownie points or to sound like it's the right thing to say.
01:58:44.000Right, or just to make noise on TV, just to be saying something.
01:58:48.000And then it became a booking nightmare because it went through Jerry's Rolodex at first.
01:58:53.000It was like all these really famous, fun people that he knew, like Alec Baldwin and Larry David and Madonna and all these crazy people and then that was it.
01:59:04.000He wasn't going to just keep asking friends and stuff and then the next year it was like the level of gas went way down and it was like you know you can't get those kind of the network wanted Madonna every week and you know you're getting some Road comic or something like that.
01:59:33.000Oh, and I... Yeah, on my way to the store the other night, I looked at the billboard on Laurel, and I don't know who any of those people are.
01:59:40.000LAUGHTER Yeah, I mean, they offered that shit to me when we were rebooting Fear Factor, and I was like, what?
02:00:29.000But for people that are trying to really, like I know Penn Jillette, he found that when he did it, all these people, they got more people to their show at the Rio.
02:02:48.000Letterman did a thing, one of his top tens.
02:02:50.000Remember, that was the year, like, someone went off in a, not the toboggan, like, a luge or something when flying off the side or something.
02:02:57.000And it was like the top 10 things that he thought right before he crashed or something.
02:03:01.000And one was, no more marriage rep promos or something like that.
02:04:23.000...medical school, where they do operations.
02:04:25.000Oh, and he's addicted to cocaine, and at the end of the first season, they treat him for cocaine madness, because it's all legal back then.
02:04:33.000To treat him for cocaine madness, they give him heroin.
02:14:41.000Yeah, they tried to do that thing, that late night thing on TBS. They tried to do it, but it's like people are addicted to that NBC, CBS sort of back and forth.
02:14:52.000Do you know what TBS is on your TV? No.
02:16:49.000Pirate Bay is a site that allows you to find and access BitTorrent files pretty easily.
02:16:56.000So, like, if Tom Papa is selling his special online, like if you did a Louis CK $5 thing, they would just BitTorrent the shit out of it, and people would just...
02:17:06.000You know, somebody would buy it for five bucks, throw it up on BitTorrent, and then a bunch of people would download it for free.
02:17:28.000I mean, there's legal reasons for Pirate Bay also.
02:17:30.000Yeah, no, you could definitely get some stuff that's legal.
02:17:33.000Like if you wanted to share things, like say if you had a book and you decided you were going to release it for free as a PDF, which a lot of people do, you could just upload it and then people can get it anytime they want.
02:17:44.000And that's like one of the arguments about what file sharing actually is.