The Joe Rogan Experience - June 22, 2015


Joe Rogan Experience #663 - Dominic Monaghan


Episode Stats

Length

3 hours

Words per Minute

206.55727

Word Count

37,349

Sentence Count

3,167

Misogynist Sentences

91

Hate Speech Sentences

47


Summary

Actor Jeff Perla (Lost, Lord of the Rings) joins Jemele to discuss his iconic role on the hit TV show, Lost, and how he feels about the series finale. He also talks about his relationship with his wife, how he felt about the season finale, and what it was like being a part of one of the most iconic TV shows of all time. Plus, he talks about what it's like being an actor in Hollywood, and why he doesn't care about what other people think about his career. And, of course, there's a story about how he almost didn't make it to the final episode of the show. It's a good one, and it's one you don't want to miss! If you haven't checked out Lost on HBO, you should definitely do so. It's one of my favorite shows and I think it's a must-listen for every actor who's ever played a character on a show that's gone on to become a star in Hollywood. And if you're not a fan of Lost, you're in for a real life Lost fan, you'll definitely want to check out this one out. We talk about the show and how it's worth the price of admission and how good it is to be on the big screen. Plus, we talk about how much he's been paid for his time on the set of Lost and how much money he's made on the show, and the impact it has had on his life, so why he should have been cast in a movie that's better than the one he was cast in the movie he was supposed to be cast in. Also, he's a great guy and why you should be watching this episode of The Lord of The Rings and why it's the most important thing in your life. Thank you so much for coming on this episode. I really appreciate it, and I hope you enjoy it. -Jemele and I had a great time doing this, and we hope you do too! -Jeff Perla - Thank you, Jemele, Thank You, Jeff, and God bless you, God Bless You, Blessings, Cheers, and Much Love, -Amen and Much Blessings -Eugene -P.S. - E.J. & Elijah and Billy ( ) Thank You for Listening, E. & Alyssa, EJ & Elijah


Transcript

00:00:01.000 Good.
00:00:01.000 Oh, shit.
00:00:02.000 We're live.
00:00:03.000 Hey, fella.
00:00:03.000 What's going on?
00:00:04.000 Boom.
00:00:05.000 What's up?
00:00:05.000 Thanks for doing this, man.
00:00:06.000 Appreciate it.
00:00:06.000 I'm stoked.
00:00:07.000 We both came in here.
00:00:08.000 We had a meal together.
00:00:09.000 Unprepared.
00:00:10.000 We both were a little bit late.
00:00:12.000 We both had food.
00:00:13.000 Had a little food.
00:00:14.000 Talked a little shit.
00:00:15.000 Relaxed.
00:00:16.000 Settled in.
00:00:17.000 I got a little nervous.
00:00:18.000 Like, I was in the right area for the podcast, but when I rolled up here, I was like...
00:00:22.000 This doesn't look anything like a podcast.
00:00:24.000 And I was nervous that you're going to be like, where the fuck are you?
00:00:27.000 Well, the next place I get is going to be even less like this place.
00:00:31.000 I'm going to try to make it as discreet as possible.
00:00:35.000 I'm going to hide it.
00:00:36.000 I'm going to pretend it's a preschool.
00:00:37.000 I'm going to put a preschool sign on the outside so that young single dudes just avoid preschools at all costs.
00:00:45.000 That's the way to keep stalkers away.
00:00:48.000 Push this sucker right up to your face.
00:00:49.000 Oh, okay.
00:00:50.000 I'm declining a little bit.
00:00:52.000 So, dude, you talk about a guy who's done a lot of fucking cool shit.
00:00:55.000 You were on one of my favorite shows, Lost, up until the end, I gotta be honest.
00:00:59.000 Yes.
00:00:59.000 At the end, it was...
00:01:00.000 We can talk about it.
00:01:01.000 ...fucking Jack.
00:01:02.000 He's phoning it in, that guy.
00:01:04.000 He's driving me crazy.
00:01:06.000 Standing around that fucking pawn that brings people back to life, like he's waiting for his line to come up.
00:01:12.000 And then, you know, you were part of the Lord of the Rings, man.
00:01:15.000 I mean, fuck, dude.
00:01:16.000 I know.
00:01:17.000 Those are two amazing historical things that you're a part of.
00:01:21.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:01:21.000 And when you're doing it, as an actor, as a jobbing actor, when you're doing it, you're stoked.
00:01:25.000 I mean, I was super stoked to do those shows.
00:01:27.000 You don't realize at the time...
00:01:29.000 The real gravity of what you're doing until years later.
00:01:32.000 Me and Orlando and Elijah and Billy went out for dinner a couple of weeks ago, and we sat around saying, the further away we get from Lord of the Rings, the more important it feels in our life.
00:01:42.000 So when we're grandfathers and stuff, I'm sure we'd be like, yeah, we were involved in a piece of movie history.
00:01:47.000 But at the time, you're just like, Great job, having fun.
00:01:50.000 And that was kind of the same with Lost.
00:01:52.000 Although, to be fair, with Lost, because we were isolated on an island in the show, but also in person, you know, we were all on Oahu together.
00:01:59.000 We weren't, or certainly I wasn't, as exposed to the size of the show as much as when I went on hiatus and then people were...
00:02:08.000 Follow me around and, you know, causing hassle and stuff.
00:02:11.000 But when you're in Hawaii, there's like three restaurants to go to.
00:02:14.000 I avoid those three restaurants.
00:02:15.000 If anyone follows me, I go to the library and then sit there for a couple of hours.
00:02:18.000 So I wasn't really aware that it became this pop culture phenomenon, you know.
00:02:23.000 And then the end, oh man, the end is like, you know, I'm on Twitter and stuff and a lot of people on Twitter...
00:02:28.000 Asked me, how do you feel about the end?
00:02:30.000 And in all honesty, I didn't watch it, and I've not watched it.
00:02:33.000 You know, I left at the end of season three, came back in, peppered in season four, five, and six, but wasn't in the show when it ended.
00:02:42.000 I mean, I was in the finale, but, you know, at that point, I'd ejected myself from that world.
00:02:47.000 I was doing a movie in New York in the Lower East Side playing a completely different character, a grave robber that was working at night.
00:02:54.000 I didn't want to expose myself to this Charlie character who I'd played because I felt like I was going to bring the Charlie character onto set the next day.
00:03:02.000 So people are always very, very jazzed to talk to me about the ending.
00:03:05.000 How did you feel about it?
00:03:06.000 How did it make you feel?
00:03:07.000 Were you disappointed?
00:03:08.000 Did you love it?
00:03:09.000 And I always really fucking piss people off by going, yeah, I didn't see it.
00:03:13.000 You didn't see it?
00:03:14.000 You know, I just didn't see it.
00:03:16.000 It felt like I was getting fucked towards the end.
00:03:18.000 I was like, they're just, I'm not doing this.
00:03:20.000 And I walked away.
00:03:21.000 And I actually had an argument about it with my wife.
00:03:24.000 She's like, you gotta watch the last episode.
00:03:25.000 I'm like, I'm not watching it.
00:03:26.000 I'm not watching it.
00:03:27.000 I'm done.
00:03:28.000 I'm done.
00:03:28.000 I don't feel connected.
00:03:29.000 Same thing with Dexter.
00:03:30.000 I walked away with Dexter.
00:03:31.000 I was completely committed in the beginning.
00:03:34.000 But you walked away, or your character died during the golden time of the show.
00:03:39.000 The show was flawless at that time.
00:03:41.000 It was so goddamn good.
00:03:43.000 It was so good.
00:03:45.000 Yeah, I left the end of season three, which I really felt like it was kind of peaking at that point.
00:03:50.000 It was the show that every late-night talk show host was talking about, or daytime, and it was in magazines, and BuzzFeed loved it and all that kind of stuff.
00:03:58.000 And then I felt like it was cresting.
00:04:01.000 And then I think the real bummer for the fans was that for the six years that it was on TV, the creators had said, it's not what you think it is.
00:04:10.000 It's something else.
00:04:13.000 Ultimately, it kind of was what a lot of people thought it was.
00:04:16.000 Yeah.
00:04:16.000 Well, I think they say that because they don't know what the fuck they're doing.
00:04:20.000 I mean, they have a giant storyboard and they're moving pieces around.
00:04:23.000 They did a phenomenal job, though.
00:04:25.000 I mean, given the constraints, first of all, of network television, of knowing that you're going to have commercial breaks and knowing that you can't have certain language and certain things you're not going to be able to show, they did a fantastic job.
00:04:38.000 I mean, it's just one of the all-time great shows, for sure.
00:04:41.000 Totally a great show.
00:04:42.000 Loved it.
00:04:42.000 Loved being involved in it.
00:04:43.000 I think it will be, you know, something that people will talk about with me for the rest of my life.
00:04:48.000 A lot of times, I'm sure you experience this as well, sometimes the things that you are personally close to, that you're working in and is a huge part of your life, it takes on a different aspect than just the simple...
00:05:03.000 Look from a fan's point of view.
00:05:05.000 Like, for me, Lost was...
00:05:06.000 It was Hawaii.
00:05:07.000 It was surfing.
00:05:08.000 It was being in love.
00:05:09.000 It was chameleons.
00:05:10.000 It was having a shitty day at work.
00:05:11.000 It was having a great day at work.
00:05:13.000 It was being hungover.
00:05:14.000 It was making new friends.
00:05:15.000 It was everything.
00:05:16.000 It was my life, you know?
00:05:17.000 Right.
00:05:17.000 For a lot of fans, it's like, oh, that's the TV show that I watched Wednesday night at 8, and it was always my friend.
00:05:23.000 But Lost, for me, was sometimes not my friend, sometimes my enemy, sometimes it was incredible, sometimes...
00:05:27.000 You know, so when people come over to me and say, what do you think about the show?
00:05:31.000 How do I make sense of that?
00:05:34.000 It's so much of me.
00:05:36.000 Do you know what I mean?
00:05:36.000 It's a lot.
00:05:37.000 Your point of view is completely singular.
00:05:41.000 I mean, no one is going to have that point of view other than the actors on the show.
00:05:44.000 And even their point of view is going to be kind of different than yours.
00:05:47.000 People watching it, they watch the finished product.
00:05:50.000 And so their association with it is totally different than yours.
00:05:53.000 Polished.
00:05:54.000 Beautiful.
00:05:55.000 There's no agenda.
00:05:56.000 They just want you to be entertained.
00:05:58.000 You know, no politics.
00:06:00.000 There's a lot of politics on Lost.
00:06:02.000 I mean, fuck, I... I got in trouble for saying this when Lost was on TV, but fuck it, I don't care about that shit.
00:06:08.000 I watched certain cast members go from making the pilot, which was a six-week pilot, where everyone was hanging out with each other, we're all partying at night, we're all spending time with each other.
00:06:17.000 I watched certain actors be like, this is the greatest job I have ever done.
00:06:22.000 I mean, Hawaii is a tropical island, getting paid well, the cast are amazing, we're going on this journey together, to shooting like episode...
00:06:30.000 Three or four of the first season and hearing people saying, I can't believe I'm not on Letterman.
00:06:35.000 Why am I not on Letterman?
00:06:36.000 You're like, two months ago, this is the greatest thing you've ever done.
00:06:39.000 And now you're like, why can't I fly to New York?
00:06:41.000 Why can't I be on a 12 o'clock flight to New York?
00:06:44.000 Why do I have to be on a 9am flight to New York?
00:06:47.000 What the fuck is wrong with you?
00:06:48.000 You're missing it.
00:06:50.000 You're missing it.
00:06:51.000 That's so common though.
00:06:52.000 That's very common with actors.
00:06:54.000 Actors are a strange breed.
00:06:57.000 When I was on news radio, we once had this discussion about Thursday night.
00:07:01.000 The Thursday night lineup on NBC was where you wanted to be.
00:07:04.000 That was Seinfeld.
00:07:05.000 That was Friends.
00:07:06.000 That was the spot.
00:07:07.000 And it was fucking Sex and the City and the single guy.
00:07:10.000 And he's what Paul Sims, the creator of news radio, called the shit sandwich spot.
00:07:16.000 Said, like, you have your two good shows and in between your show, you would put dog shit.
00:07:20.000 Right.
00:07:21.000 And everybody was complaining, why can't we be on Thursday?
00:07:23.000 And I'm like, guys, last time I checked, we're on television.
00:07:27.000 Like, we're on a sitcom on actual television, and it's funny.
00:07:32.000 Like, these are the golden years.
00:07:33.000 Like, we're going to look back when we're old, and we're going to say, fuck, we were so lucky.
00:07:38.000 But while it's happening, everybody's like, why am I not in The Hollywood Reporter?
00:07:41.000 Why am I not getting a development deal?
00:07:43.000 Why can't I star in my own movie?
00:07:45.000 You know?
00:07:45.000 Why did he get it?
00:07:46.000 I didn't get it.
00:07:47.000 Oh, God.
00:07:48.000 I did that in my teens and early 20s.
00:07:51.000 But how come he's got it?
00:07:52.000 And my agent, my English agent, who I'm not with anymore, at one point, you know, we went for dinner and he sat me down.
00:07:58.000 He was like, the reason why he's getting it and you're not is because you are not him.
00:08:03.000 He has a completely different journey in his life.
00:08:05.000 He looks different.
00:08:06.000 He acts different.
00:08:07.000 You're not the same.
00:08:08.000 He won't get the roles that you're going to get.
00:08:10.000 He won't get the opportunities that you'll get.
00:08:12.000 And you won't get his.
00:08:14.000 But...
00:08:14.000 Quit that bullshit because that's not going to get you anywhere.
00:08:16.000 That's a great perspective.
00:08:18.000 So true.
00:08:18.000 It's hard to find someone to lay it down like that, though.
00:08:21.000 Yeah, my agent was gnarly.
00:08:22.000 That's great.
00:08:23.000 You had a good guy.
00:08:24.000 Yeah, he was.
00:08:24.000 He was really good.
00:08:25.000 And then you have to absorb it.
00:08:26.000 Right.
00:08:27.000 You have to take it in and you have to separate it from your ego and all your preconceived notions and assumptions and actually absorb it.
00:08:34.000 Right, and also swallow that very bitter pill of regardless of however unfair you think it is and how it should change and be justified, and one day it will all be okay.
00:08:45.000 Maybe it won't.
00:08:46.000 And that's really, I mean, we're talking about one very specific endeavor, but it's analogous to life itself, because people will look at people that are doing other things in life, and they'll be upset that they're not doing those things, even though they've taken very little or no effort to try to do any of those things.
00:09:02.000 Right, right.
00:09:03.000 It's just they become haters.
00:09:05.000 It's crazy that even a successful person on a huge show like Lost can become a hater.
00:09:12.000 Oh yeah, yeah.
00:09:13.000 Isn't that adorable?
00:09:14.000 I mean, it's kind of funny.
00:09:15.000 I mean, it's a human characteristic, right?
00:09:18.000 We're always going to compare ourselves to other people.
00:09:20.000 I went for a walk yesterday around Griffith Park and I was talking with my friend about the whole comparison thing.
00:09:28.000 And I was saying, like, you know that Bill Gates gets up some days and he's like, what the fuck?
00:09:34.000 You know?
00:09:35.000 Like, Jesus Christ, I can't fucking catch a break, you know?
00:09:38.000 And he's just having a shit day.
00:09:39.000 All your problems are relative, you know?
00:09:41.000 And it's okay to have them.
00:09:42.000 We're all going to have them.
00:09:43.000 It's just...
00:09:44.000 You've got to navigate your way through them with a little bit of grace.
00:09:47.000 It seems like those pitfalls in life are just a part of being a human being in this weird world because this world is not like any world that ever existed.
00:09:57.000 There was never a million different people that you could compare yourself to that were on television or singing songs or on the internet.
00:10:04.000 There's all these different people that you can look at and then you look at yourself and make these comparisons.
00:10:08.000 It used to just be the people that were around you.
00:10:10.000 And that's what it used to be for the entire history of the human race.
00:10:14.000 It was only the people you could see with your eyes and come in contact with.
00:10:17.000 Other than that, you didn't have this weird perspective.
00:10:20.000 And I think it's part of what a human being is.
00:10:25.000 We're constantly striving to improve.
00:10:28.000 It's why we stay alive.
00:10:30.000 It's why we build homes.
00:10:32.000 It's why we try to get good at a career.
00:10:35.000 It's like this desire to get better at things also leads you to compare your own progress against the progress of others.
00:10:42.000 And that's where the pitfall comes in.
00:10:44.000 Right, and obviously a lot of people in this new society that we've created with social media and instant information, a lot of those people that have become successful and famous are in those places because they are the fucking elite.
00:10:57.000 So now we're comparing ourselves to the elite.
00:11:00.000 Like, you could be a great basketball player, have an amazing game, come home, start watching YouTube feeds of Dwayne Wade or, you know, LeBron, and you're like, oh, I'm fucking terrible.
00:11:08.000 No, you're not terrible.
00:11:09.000 These are the exception.
00:11:10.000 And we're exposing ourselves to the exception almost all the time now.
00:11:14.000 Everyone on Twitter is brilliant.
00:11:15.000 In that sense, those comparisons are great and beneficial because they force you to try to achieve a higher standard.
00:11:22.000 Right.
00:11:22.000 As long as you can keep yourself from going mad.
00:11:24.000 And what about the fact that you'll never...
00:11:27.000 I'm never going to slam dunk.
00:11:29.000 I don't have the athletic body ability to slam dunk.
00:11:32.000 So if my whole ambition was like, I want to slam dunk.
00:11:35.000 I know Boykins can slam dunk.
00:11:36.000 He's smaller than me.
00:11:37.000 I can't do it.
00:11:38.000 I just can't do it.
00:11:39.000 I've tried.
00:11:39.000 I don't get anywhere near.
00:11:40.000 I don't have the ability to do it.
00:11:42.000 How much have you tried?
00:11:44.000 You know what I mean?
00:11:45.000 Like if you went to a strength and conditioning coach, you said, listen, I'm Dominic Monaghan.
00:11:48.000 I got a lot of fucking money.
00:11:49.000 Come on, bitch.
00:11:50.000 You're going to get me in fucking top-notch shape.
00:11:53.000 We're going to do deadlifts.
00:11:54.000 You're going to get me pumped up with steroids.
00:11:56.000 I'm dunking, dude.
00:11:57.000 I'm fucking dunking.
00:11:58.000 What is it?
00:11:58.000 The vertical leap?
00:11:59.000 Get my vertical leap down?
00:12:00.000 Yeah, maybe I've not tried to the extent...
00:12:02.000 That, you know, some people have.
00:12:03.000 But I don't know.
00:12:04.000 I think there's something potentially harmful.
00:12:08.000 You know, it's like the whole thing with beautiful women, you know?
00:12:09.000 I mean, a lot of people, a lot of ladies, and maybe men, feel that pressure to be that perfect thing.
00:12:15.000 But that perfect thing isn't necessarily real.
00:12:17.000 Well, you know what's really frustrating?
00:12:19.000 When you meet a girl who doesn't like her body, and you love her body, and she's comparing herself to stick figures that are like models that are wearing these weird outfits that weigh 18 pounds.
00:12:30.000 Your body is a woman's body.
00:12:32.000 The fat, the stuff that you don't like, we like that.
00:12:35.000 We like a fat ass.
00:12:36.000 Sure, sure.
00:12:37.000 Yeah, I mean, it's a part of being sexy.
00:12:39.000 It's actually attractive to men.
00:12:42.000 Right.
00:12:42.000 But women are comparing to the way fashion models look and the way other women perceive.
00:12:47.000 Like, there's certain women, like, I know this lady who she doesn't think that women look good unless they look like sticks.
00:12:56.000 Right.
00:12:56.000 Like, she has this weird thing in her head.
00:12:58.000 And, like, her friends will try to talk to her about it.
00:13:01.000 Like, that's not true.
00:13:02.000 But after a while, you just get tired of talking about it.
00:13:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:13:04.000 Like, you're crazy.
00:13:05.000 Like, you look great.
00:13:06.000 You look great.
00:13:07.000 Right.
00:13:07.000 Like, don't...
00:13:07.000 This ain't about that.
00:13:08.000 You could be born in Ethiopia with no feet, you know?
00:13:10.000 You could have been fucked.
00:13:12.000 You could have been one of those kids that's born in Iraq that has to deal with the aftermath of all the fucking hazardous waste that's in that area that's causing all these kids to be born with massive deformities.
00:13:23.000 Like, you're lucky as shit.
00:13:24.000 Right.
00:13:25.000 You can't go on about the fact that you're not skinny enough.
00:13:28.000 Yeah, I mean, obviously a lot of that is the societal thing.
00:13:31.000 I mean, I make a big distinction between a girl's body and a woman's body.
00:13:35.000 I mean, there is a difference.
00:13:36.000 Most of the fashion lines want to put their models in the clothes when they have a girl's body because they're a co-hanger, right?
00:13:44.000 Yeah, a coat hanger.
00:13:46.000 That's the way to look at it, because that's what they really are.
00:13:48.000 They're clothes hangers.
00:13:49.000 Like, your clothes look best when they're not being stuffed into, like, Jennifer Lopez's body.
00:13:54.000 But to a man, like, that's what men like.
00:13:57.000 You see that fucking ass in the waist.
00:14:00.000 Jesus!
00:14:01.000 Beyonce.
00:14:01.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:14:02.000 That's a fucking woman.
00:14:04.000 Yes.
00:14:05.000 But, you know, those women, we were talking about this the other day, like, that didn't used to be hot.
00:14:11.000 Like, if you go back and look at the Playboys from, like, the 70s and the 80s, they didn't even concentrate on asses.
00:14:17.000 Like, it wasn't, for whatever reason, that wasn't a focus.
00:14:21.000 I don't know what happened.
00:14:23.000 Or do we think it's the hip-hop community?
00:14:24.000 Do we think it's the rap community?
00:14:25.000 Probably.
00:14:26.000 I mean, I remember being 12 and seeing a cover of an Ice-T album that had girls in onesie bikinis with big asses, and I was like, oh, damn.
00:14:37.000 That's true, right?
00:14:37.000 That one where Ice-T had a machine gun behind his back, and the girl was in a bikini, and she had a thong on.
00:14:44.000 He may have ended up marrying her, maybe.
00:14:46.000 I think he did.
00:14:46.000 I think that was his wife for a while, before he got rid of her and got the cocoa.
00:14:50.000 Right.
00:14:50.000 And that was the first time I was exposed to that.
00:14:52.000 You know, because for me, it was like Princess Leia growing up was my thing, my jam.
00:14:57.000 We didn't even know what her body looked like.
00:14:58.000 We had no idea.
00:14:59.000 There it is.
00:15:00.000 But even then, look at her ass.
00:15:02.000 Yeah.
00:15:02.000 In comparison to today.
00:15:03.000 It's not quite there, but at the time, that was kind of revolutionary.
00:15:06.000 Look, I'm not hating it.
00:15:07.000 It's not terrible, but...
00:15:10.000 That's nothing compared to, you know, what is her name?
00:15:13.000 The fucking Nicki Minaj?
00:15:14.000 Look at a girl right here on Power, Sonora, just to the right there.
00:15:17.000 I mean, that girl's loaded.
00:15:18.000 Yeah, click on that one, Jamie.
00:15:20.000 Jesus Christ, what is that?
00:15:22.000 That's much more rapper.
00:15:25.000 But what's interesting is it seems the attraction to that seems fundamental.
00:15:30.000 So why wasn't it there in the 70s and the 80s?
00:15:34.000 It seems genetic.
00:15:35.000 Right.
00:15:36.000 Was it seen to be, I don't know, obscene?
00:15:39.000 Oh god, that photo kills me.
00:15:41.000 Her ass is retarded.
00:15:42.000 Nicki Minaj, that anaconda picture.
00:15:44.000 Like, what is that?
00:15:45.000 Is that real?
00:15:46.000 I think so.
00:15:47.000 Wow.
00:15:48.000 A little extra brushing, but...
00:15:50.000 Yeah, maybe, but I mean...
00:15:51.000 But whatever.
00:15:52.000 That's insane.
00:15:54.000 Phenomenal.
00:15:55.000 Yeah, what genetics but again like Obviously, it's a lot of his girls doing squats and girls concentrating on that area and developing their butt But I just it's weird to me that that wasn't a big deal in the 70s and the 80s and whatever and then somewhere along the line hip-hop community sort of Ignited what seems to be a fundamental attraction that men have right also like you know I think?
00:16:41.000 I'm gonna be with these little waifish, you know, girls, because I was a little kid at the time, and then later on, I don't know, there's a fantasy element to it, right?
00:16:50.000 Right.
00:16:52.000 Well, for girls, though, the look of a man being like a big, muscular, like The Rock or something like that, that's always existed.
00:17:00.000 Like Conan the Barbarian, you know, that's always been around.
00:17:02.000 You go back to the Robert E. Howard illustrations that Frank Fazetta did, like way back in the 70s, this fucking yoked out giant barbarian.
00:17:10.000 It's universal.
00:17:11.000 Well, like Roman or Greek gods.
00:17:13.000 I mean, there's sculptures that have been around forever.
00:17:15.000 They're all cut and ripped and stuff.
00:17:16.000 But the women back then were all fat and Rubenesque, you know, right?
00:17:21.000 They didn't have those bodies that the bodies have today.
00:17:23.000 There's like a weird change.
00:17:25.000 And it doesn't exist in males.
00:17:27.000 It exists in women.
00:17:28.000 Very interesting.
00:17:29.000 Yeah, that is interesting.
00:17:30.000 I mean, I, you know, I appreciate a lady that kind of takes care of herself simply because I feel as if I need to, you know?
00:17:41.000 I'm not the biggest dude in the world, but I go to the gym when I'm free because it gets me out of the house.
00:17:46.000 And also I like to try and go to the gym Monday to Friday so that my Saturday, Sunday I can do whatever I want.
00:17:52.000 And I eat relatively correctly so that on the weekend if I want to chow down some food that's a little naughty, it's not going to make a huge difference.
00:17:59.000 If I'm doing that, I would like to be with someone who has the same common sense about...
00:18:07.000 Their body and the way that they look.
00:18:10.000 It's a bit of an issue for me because I love pizza and I like buffalo wings and I could easily eat all that stuff and get much bigger, but I'm aware of the fact that it's not healthy for you.
00:18:21.000 You shouldn't necessarily be doing that.
00:18:22.000 To your body, putting it under that much stress.
00:18:24.000 But also, I want to feel and look and present myself good because I want to feel good about myself.
00:18:32.000 And the issue with people just kind of abusing themselves in that way says something a little sinister about how they personally feel about themselves.
00:18:41.000 It's self-abuse, right?
00:18:42.000 I mean, if you know that food is making you more unhealthy and you're eating it on a daily basis, that is a form of self-abuse.
00:18:49.000 And I don't necessarily feel attracted to people who are abusing themselves on a consistent basis.
00:18:54.000 Yeah, I mean, that's natural.
00:18:56.000 But it's also weirdly natural for people to abuse themselves, to get caught in that cycle of overeating and then feeling shitty because you're overeating.
00:19:05.000 And that's a very common cycle for people to get trapped in.
00:19:08.000 And I really wonder what the mechanism of that is.
00:19:11.000 Like, what's the evolutionary advantage to having that in the human species?
00:19:17.000 Because it's so common.
00:19:18.000 I mean, everywhere you look, especially in America, you just see overweight people everywhere.
00:19:23.000 They know.
00:19:23.000 They have to know.
00:19:24.000 It's not like this is some secret that's locked up in the fucking vaults in Qumran.
00:19:29.000 You have to crack the code to find out that you shouldn't eat pizza at 3 o'clock in the morning.
00:19:32.000 Right.
00:19:33.000 And they don't suddenly wake up and go, oh my god, what is this?
00:19:35.000 What is this?
00:19:36.000 Like, they've seen it occur, you know?
00:19:38.000 Right.
00:19:38.000 I don't think that's the evolution of our species.
00:19:40.000 I think that's those moments where...
00:19:43.000 We do want to abuse ourselves.
00:19:45.000 We do want to feel badly.
00:19:46.000 It doesn't extend us as a species to do that.
00:19:49.000 It's the way that we feel bad.
00:19:51.000 But you eat relatively healthy.
00:19:53.000 You work out and stuff.
00:19:54.000 What's your food kryptonite?
00:19:58.000 Oh my god, I love it.
00:19:59.000 I gotta have it.
00:20:00.000 I do love pizza.
00:20:02.000 I do love shitty pastas and pizzas and things that I know that I shouldn't eat.
00:20:06.000 That's pretty much it.
00:20:07.000 But I'm pretty good because I enjoy healthy food.
00:20:10.000 Like I was eating vegan food when you came in here.
00:20:13.000 Because I want to, you know?
00:20:14.000 Because I just did yoga and I'm like, that's a good thing to eat.
00:20:18.000 It feels good to eat clean.
00:20:20.000 Do you give yourself like a free pass?
00:20:23.000 You're like, every Sunday I can have a slice of pizza.
00:20:25.000 You know, I don't though.
00:20:27.000 I do, but I kind of would if I was more inclined to eat shitty.
00:20:31.000 Like if it was like more of a thing that I had to separate myself from.
00:20:35.000 But it's not that hard for me.
00:20:36.000 I eat relatively clean because I like to eat relatively clean.
00:20:40.000 I mean, when I say relatively clean, I should say overwhelmingly clean.
00:20:43.000 Most of the food I eat is really healthy.
00:20:45.000 It's just, I just, I know too much.
00:20:47.000 You know, at this point in time, I'd be upset at myself if I didn't.
00:20:50.000 I just know too much about the actual effects.
00:20:52.000 Good for you.
00:20:53.000 Generally, in the mornings, I either eat fruit or I drink a kale shake, you know, one of those blended up shakes with kale and celery and cucumber and garlic and all that jazz.
00:21:04.000 And then, you know, in the afternoon, it depends.
00:21:06.000 But if I feel like having a cheeseburger, I'll have a fucking cheeseburger, too.
00:21:10.000 Yeah, well, you've earned it, you know.
00:21:11.000 We were talking about this off-air.
00:21:12.000 Like, I'm lucky enough to travel nine months of my year pretty intensively, you know, A week in a place, 10 days in a place, a week in a place, 10 days in a place.
00:21:23.000 Because of that, lots of long distance flying.
00:21:26.000 I have no semblance of a schedule in terms of food.
00:21:30.000 So I lose weight based on those factors and also the fact that my metabolism is very high running.
00:21:37.000 I need very little sleep to function.
00:21:40.000 My mum used to tell me this all the time when I was a kid.
00:21:42.000 If there was something more interesting for me to do, I would forego eating.
00:21:47.000 So she'd be like, dinner's on the table.
00:21:48.000 I'd be like, wait, can I just finish this thing?
00:21:50.000 She'd be like, okay, fine.
00:21:51.000 And she said, you would just not have dinner.
00:21:54.000 And then she would have to remind me, you didn't eat dinner.
00:21:55.000 And I'm like, okay, let me eat it.
00:21:57.000 And then I'll go back to that thing.
00:21:58.000 So you would eat just like out of like a necessity?
00:22:01.000 Yeah.
00:22:02.000 A pleasurable thing that you just got to get in your mouth?
00:22:03.000 Just get it down because my mom and dad told me.
00:22:05.000 I mean, I was obsessed by football, soccer when I was a kid.
00:22:09.000 I would get up in the morning, run out of my house when I was going to school, run out of my house before breakfast, no breakfast, get to school, play football for an hour before nine o'clock.
00:22:17.000 So from eight till nine, I'd play football with my friends.
00:22:19.000 Break time was 10.15 till 11.15.
00:22:22.000 Most people ate at that point.
00:22:24.000 Most people had a snack, chips, fruit, sandwich.
00:22:27.000 I would play football.
00:22:28.000 Lunchtime was an hour.
00:22:29.000 All my friends would eat.
00:22:31.000 I would play football.
00:22:32.000 First thing that I would put in my mouth, pretty much all the time, certainly more than average in school, like I would say 65% of the time, would be candy on the way home.
00:22:41.000 LAUGHTER So I'd walk into the convenience store, buy one pounds worth of candy.
00:22:45.000 You must have been starving.
00:22:46.000 Dude, I was emaciated when I was a kid.
00:22:49.000 And I was burning, what, I don't know, 10,000 calories a day and just putting sugar in me, you know, so I was super skinny.
00:22:55.000 And that has transferred over into my adult life where my trainer...
00:23:00.000 He's always said to me, it's consistency, Dom.
00:23:02.000 You need to be in the gym five days a week.
00:23:04.000 So I'm like, okay, Ryan, I'm here for a month.
00:23:07.000 Let's do five days a week and get it popping.
00:23:09.000 And he's like, okay, cool.
00:23:10.000 And then three weeks in, I'm like, I put on a little bit, but I'm not feeling it.
00:23:14.000 And he says, let's talk about what you're eating.
00:23:17.000 I'm like...
00:23:18.000 Couple of mouthfuls of oatmeal for breakfast.
00:23:21.000 Some pineapple and some grapes for lunch.
00:23:24.000 He's like, no, no, no.
00:23:24.000 You need tuna steak.
00:23:25.000 You need salmon.
00:23:26.000 You need chicken.
00:23:27.000 You need tofu.
00:23:28.000 You need fat.
00:23:28.000 You need almonds.
00:23:29.000 You need avocados.
00:23:30.000 And he would show me what I'm supposed to eat.
00:23:32.000 I'm like, I can't eat that.
00:23:33.000 I can't get it in my system.
00:23:34.000 I'm going to puke.
00:23:36.000 But, you know, everyone's got their own thing that they're dealing with.
00:23:39.000 But I'm never going to be as big as you.
00:23:41.000 Your frame is bigger and you're a naturally big guy.
00:23:44.000 What my trainer said is, like, you can get caught, you can get Bruce Lee-ish, but you're never going to get Jean-Claude Van Damme-ish.
00:23:52.000 But the way to do that is to still eat, feed that fire.
00:23:56.000 Yeah.
00:23:56.000 Well, if you did want to pack weight on, you would have to do these big compound exercises like deadlifts.
00:24:03.000 You'd have to do squats.
00:24:04.000 You'd have to do things where your body literally has to change.
00:24:07.000 Your body, your bone structure has to change.
00:24:09.000 Your bone structure will change.
00:24:11.000 I mean, it will densify.
00:24:13.000 The density of your bone structure definitely alters when you do heavy, heavy lifting.
00:24:18.000 Because your body realizes, like, hey, this dumb motherfucker is going to pick up big, heavy shit all day.
00:24:23.000 We have to get thicker.
00:24:24.000 Yeah.
00:24:24.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:24:24.000 So it literally will make your bones thicker and denser.
00:24:27.000 I want that.
00:24:28.000 The biggest I ever was, can you pull up the poster for the pilot of Lost?
00:24:34.000 Like the first ever poster for Lost is all of us on a beach.
00:24:37.000 It's the biggest I ever was.
00:24:38.000 I was probably like 158 pounds, something like that, which is big on me.
00:24:42.000 I put on like 12, 14 pounds of muscle.
00:24:45.000 And my fucking biceps are like this.
00:24:48.000 And I never got that big ever again.
00:24:50.000 And at the time...
00:24:51.000 What were you doing?
00:24:52.000 No, it's like more of an iconic silhouette on a beach.
00:24:56.000 Hang on.
00:24:58.000 Oh, Jesus.
00:25:01.000 Okay, what was I doing?
00:25:03.000 I had food delivery.
00:25:05.000 Ah, that's good.
00:25:07.000 And the food delivery was like, I'm going to the gym, give me clean food, give me lots of clean food.
00:25:12.000 I was in the gym once a day and then I did a little bit of running around my local area and it was consistency.
00:25:20.000 Yeah, that's the thing, right?
00:25:21.000 Consistent.
00:25:22.000 It's about getting a good groove going, right?
00:25:25.000 It's about just getting a good habit going where this is what you do.
00:25:28.000 They say that if you could do something every day for 90 days, then it'll become like a part of you.
00:25:33.000 They say that that's like one of the best ways to quit smoking is if you can get addicted to something else and get used to doing that every day.
00:25:41.000 There you go.
00:25:41.000 But you need a slightly high-res version.
00:25:43.000 You can't really see it, but I am huge there for me.
00:25:47.000 I mean, I don't look huge because I'm not the biggest guy in the world, but, like, you can...
00:25:50.000 Well, I can see, at least.
00:25:51.000 Like, my fucking...
00:25:52.000 I can see some muscle.
00:25:53.000 Yeah, my biceps are going off right there.
00:25:55.000 Was there any hesitation at all in being sequestered on this island like that and being a part of this crazy show where you had to change your whole life?
00:26:03.000 I mean, you had to move.
00:26:04.000 Yeah, I met JJ Abrams and he just solved all of those conundrums for me.
00:26:11.000 Really?
00:26:11.000 How so?
00:26:12.000 He's just a brilliant guy.
00:26:14.000 You meet brilliant guys every so often and I think anytime you're around someone who's brilliant, you have to sit up and take notes.
00:26:23.000 And I just was aware that I was around someone with a very fast-moving, smart mind.
00:26:31.000 And I went in for a general audition and sat down with J.J. and his partner, Brian Burke, and we just talked about English comedy for like 45 minutes.
00:26:41.000 Talked about Monty Python and Eddie Izzard and The Goons and The Goodies and Derek and Clive.
00:26:47.000 And we did this whole thing.
00:26:48.000 We were doing impressions for each other.
00:26:50.000 No audition.
00:26:51.000 And I left.
00:26:52.000 I called my agent and he was like, how did it go?
00:26:54.000 And I was like, it went well, but we didn't talk about the show.
00:26:56.000 We just talked about comedy and goofed around and stuff.
00:26:59.000 He was like, all right, cool.
00:27:00.000 Then they got back in touch with him and said, we love Dom.
00:27:03.000 They had this character of Charlie, who at the time was this 55-year-old rocker, like a Robert Plant guy at the time, that had been through all of it and was in the tail end of his career and got stuck on the island.
00:27:18.000 And they reworked it, and when JJ and I sat down, I was like, what is more frustrating for that artist to have the barest glimpse of fame?
00:27:27.000 He's had this one hit...
00:27:29.000 And it almost worked out his entire life.
00:27:32.000 It almost did it for him.
00:27:33.000 And then he's on this fucking island and he can't get back to the place where he could make it all happen, you know?
00:27:39.000 And I think, you know, J.J. Love responded to that kind of frustration level.
00:27:43.000 And I was just aware that it was going to be a big deal.
00:27:47.000 He directed the pilot.
00:27:48.000 He co-wrote the pilot.
00:27:50.000 It felt like something that was going to be, you know, big and impressive, and I trusted him.
00:27:57.000 And there wasn't a huge amount...
00:27:59.000 When it's a no-brainer job like that, it doesn't take a huge amount of thought.
00:28:04.000 You're just like, well, yeah, of course I'm going to do it.
00:28:06.000 There's no...
00:28:07.000 Living in Hawaii would be a really tough decision to make.
00:28:11.000 I wouldn't mind one day living in Hawaii, but I would have to be really done with cities.
00:28:17.000 Just done.
00:28:19.000 I need something different in my life.
00:28:21.000 A job?
00:28:23.000 They want you to move to Hawaii and be like, ooh, boy, I don't know.
00:28:26.000 Did you get island fever at all?
00:28:27.000 You know, I actually didn't.
00:28:28.000 A lot of people on the cast did.
00:28:30.000 I'm into jungles and forests and animals and stuff, so for me, I was kind of buzzing off that.
00:28:35.000 I had said to them before I moved out there, because they were putting us in houses, I was like, Can you put me in the jungle?
00:28:41.000 Can you put me straight up in the jungle in a house that's surrounded by trees and animals?
00:28:45.000 And because they didn't know me, the producers were like, you don't want to do that.
00:28:48.000 You're going to be isolated.
00:28:49.000 You're going to be on your own.
00:28:50.000 There's going to be nothing around you.
00:28:51.000 That's exactly what I wanted to do.
00:28:53.000 So I ended up living in Kailua for a little bit on the island of Oahu.
00:28:57.000 Then moved to Lanakai for a little bit.
00:29:00.000 What's Lanakai?
00:29:01.000 Lanakai is this loop.
00:29:02.000 It's a little...
00:29:03.000 Half a mile loop, very exclusive little part of the island, southeast part of the island.
00:29:10.000 Michelle Pfeiffer has a house there, so I was able to watch her go on her daily run every day, which is pretty fantastic.
00:29:17.000 She lives there, huh?
00:29:18.000 I think she has like a summery place around there.
00:29:20.000 She's still on, huh?
00:29:21.000 Oh my gosh, she's so cute.
00:29:24.000 So little as well.
00:29:25.000 She's tiny.
00:29:25.000 How old is she?
00:29:26.000 Well, at the time, she was probably in her mid-40s, mid-50s now, maybe.
00:29:29.000 At least, right?
00:29:30.000 Yeah, maybe even 50. Still hot.
00:29:32.000 So hot.
00:29:33.000 She'd wear little, you know, cycling shorts and a little, like, running thing, and I was like, oh.
00:29:38.000 Did she say hi to you ever?
00:29:39.000 No.
00:29:39.000 No.
00:29:40.000 I never said hi to her either.
00:29:41.000 I made sure that I was just watching out the window with my binoculars.
00:29:44.000 But your fucking sighting scope.
00:29:46.000 Right.
00:29:48.000 But Hawaii was, you know, it was cool.
00:29:51.000 I liked it.
00:29:52.000 I learned to surf in New Zealand, which is a gnarly place to surf.
00:29:56.000 Very cold waves, relatively dumpy waves.
00:29:58.000 There's no curl on that wave.
00:30:00.000 It just picks you up and drops you, which if it's the first time you've ever surfed it, you assume that all waves are like that.
00:30:05.000 You have to be in a wetsuit.
00:30:07.000 Lots of times you have to be in booties.
00:30:08.000 There were times when it was so cold I would come out of the water that I'd have to use two hands to unlock my car door because I couldn't use one hand.
00:30:16.000 It had frozen, you know, so I'd have to go...
00:30:18.000 Meanwhile, you move to Hawaii, board shorts, you don't have to wear a t-shirt.
00:30:22.000 Bathwater.
00:30:23.000 Bathwater.
00:30:24.000 Turtles everywhere, dolphins.
00:30:26.000 So I was big on surfing and in the first month or so that I was in Hawaii, I went to the Apple store in Honolulu and...
00:30:35.000 I met one of my favorite surfers of all time, a guy called Kalani Robb.
00:30:39.000 And when I was playing Kelly Slater's pro surfer game, I would always pick Kalani because he did the most radical moves, you know?
00:30:46.000 So I'm in the Apple store.
00:30:47.000 He's there with his boys.
00:30:48.000 I was like, shit, that's Kalani Robb.
00:30:50.000 And then he comes over to me.
00:30:51.000 He's like, dude, you're that guy in Lord of the Rings.
00:30:53.000 I was like, oh, shit.
00:30:54.000 It's on now.
00:30:56.000 So I was like, you're Kalani Rob.
00:30:57.000 I was like, I'm here for like nine months.
00:30:59.000 Can you help me out surfing?
00:31:00.000 He was like, yeah, we're going to go to the North Shore now.
00:31:02.000 So I came with him, hung out, and we became really tight.
00:31:06.000 So a huge story for Hawaii, for me, was getting to know Kalani.
00:31:11.000 I mean, he took me into waves that I had no business being involved in.
00:31:15.000 There's a place called Goat Island on the North Shore.
00:31:17.000 Which is a heavy wave and you have to paddle out to an island, walk across the island because then you're going to miss the break and then paddle out past the break.
00:31:25.000 There's no concept of you paddling out through the break because it's so big.
00:31:29.000 So I was with Kalani and a few of his mates and we were all getting ready and he came over to me.
00:31:33.000 He was like, okay, this is the most hectic wave I'm ever going to take you into.
00:31:37.000 Stay close to me.
00:31:38.000 If you need help, let me know.
00:31:40.000 Don't fuck around, because it can kill you.
00:31:42.000 And don't go left, go right.
00:31:45.000 No, no, don't go right, go left.
00:31:46.000 Because it's going to peel left, but if you go right, you're in the braking zone and you're fucked.
00:31:51.000 I was like, alright, cool.
00:31:53.000 I sense a fucking terrible story coming up.
00:31:56.000 So we paddle out, and I'm having fun, and I'm watching everyone in the lineup.
00:32:00.000 I'm about 10 feet away from the drop zone, so I'm able to sit there on the wave and watch people like...
00:32:05.000 I get spat out the other side.
00:32:06.000 I'm like, alright, cool.
00:32:07.000 I got this.
00:32:08.000 It's fast.
00:32:09.000 I'm going to take it.
00:32:10.000 So I paddle, I paddle, I paddle.
00:32:12.000 Wave picks me up.
00:32:13.000 It's big.
00:32:13.000 I'm like, oh shit.
00:32:14.000 Super powerful.
00:32:16.000 Drops me.
00:32:16.000 And I really try and go left.
00:32:18.000 I like cut the board and I try and go left.
00:32:19.000 But it's so powerful because it's breaking here on my left that it spits me to the right.
00:32:23.000 I'm fully aware that it spat me to the right.
00:32:25.000 So I'm like, okay, shit.
00:32:27.000 I'm just going to wipe out, take a big breath, and paddle out.
00:32:31.000 So I wipe out, I go under, come up, and as is usually the case with if you're surfing anything above overhead, when you come up, that wave's coming for you again.
00:32:40.000 So what you have to do is take a huge breath, go under, and it's the next time you come up that you can make progress.
00:32:45.000 Because you're out of breath, you're disoriented.
00:32:47.000 I do that and I, Joe, I just can't, I can never catch a break.
00:32:51.000 So I go under, thrown around by the washing machine, come up, I think, okay, get on your board, start paddling, look, waves right there.
00:32:56.000 I'm like, go under again, hold my breath, come up again, and I'm trying to time it so that I can get it.
00:33:01.000 I'm just getting pounded, pounded, pounded, pounded.
00:33:04.000 And at one point, I see Kalani paddling over to me.
00:33:07.000 I'm like, all right, cool, we're going to be okay.
00:33:09.000 So Kalani comes over to me and he's like mad.
00:33:11.000 Like I've never really heard him be mad before.
00:33:13.000 He's like, dude, get on your board and go that way.
00:33:15.000 I'm like, okay, that's what I've been trying to do for like 10 minutes.
00:33:19.000 But so now he's behind me.
00:33:21.000 He's paddling.
00:33:22.000 I'm paddling.
00:33:23.000 He's pushing me, paddling, pushing me, paddling like fucking Superman.
00:33:26.000 And we eventually get out past the break.
00:33:28.000 So he's like, all right, you're going to sit here for 20 minutes.
00:33:30.000 And then when I'm done, you're going to paddle in with me safe.
00:33:33.000 And I was like, okay, fine.
00:33:34.000 I got it.
00:33:35.000 So when we come in, He's like, the reason why I came in to get you was not only were you in the drop zone, but you were like completely lacking of any color on your face.
00:33:44.000 And he was like, people in the lineup were saying, dude, go get your boy because he's in trouble.
00:33:48.000 And I was like, I was handling it.
00:33:50.000 I was definitely out of breath and a little fucked up, but he's a water man.
00:33:53.000 So he was like, no, eight more waves on your head like that.
00:33:56.000 You wouldn't have had the strength to fight past the wave and get up.
00:33:59.000 Yeah, because you get these little gasps in there.
00:34:01.000 Oh, dude.
00:34:02.000 It's so heavy.
00:34:03.000 And here's a really good trick.
00:34:04.000 Kalani taught me this one.
00:34:05.000 He's like, if you're under the water and you're rolling around and you're fucked and you need to take a breath, drink the tiniest amount of seawater.
00:34:12.000 Tiny.
00:34:13.000 A sip.
00:34:13.000 Just go like that.
00:34:15.000 Tricks your body into thinking you took a breath.
00:34:18.000 And it will give you an extra five seconds or so because you've just taken an in...
00:34:21.000 Well, not an inhalation, but you've put something in your body.
00:34:24.000 So your lungs are like, okay, we can chill.
00:34:25.000 The panic goes for a little bit.
00:34:27.000 Really?
00:34:28.000 Yeah.
00:34:28.000 And I've done that a few times.
00:34:29.000 I've been under and I'm like, take a little swallow and come back.
00:34:32.000 Wow, how weird.
00:34:34.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:34:35.000 Isn't it funny you're fighting for five second increments, too?
00:34:37.000 Oh, dude, it's so hectic.
00:34:40.000 Surfing seems crazy.
00:34:41.000 You never done it?
00:34:42.000 No, never done it.
00:34:43.000 Oh, you look like someone that can handle it.
00:34:44.000 I mean, you need a big-ish boy, but you're an athlete.
00:34:46.000 You can handle it.
00:34:47.000 Yeah, seems like a lot of work.
00:34:49.000 It also seems like something you get addicted to.
00:34:51.000 I'm scared of things that you get addicted to.
00:34:52.000 Really?
00:34:53.000 Yeah.
00:34:53.000 You're not addicted to working out or fighting?
00:34:55.000 Oh yeah, exactly.
00:34:55.000 I just don't have any more time.
00:34:57.000 I'm just afraid of some new thing in my life that I get addicted to, and then I just think about it all the time.
00:35:02.000 I go through different obsessions and stuff with certain things.
00:35:05.000 But what's...
00:35:05.000 So what's...
00:35:06.000 Like you're doing this thing right now on Instagram with The Rock where he's fucking lifting up kettlebells and you're lifting up kettlebells.
00:35:11.000 Are you guys tight?
00:35:12.000 Do you know each other?
00:35:13.000 No, I know him online.
00:35:15.000 We're e-pals.
00:35:16.000 Right, okay.
00:35:16.000 You know, and we share, you know, we have friends and he's going to We do the podcast eventually we're working on because one of the companies that he's involved with is Roots of Fight, this company that does all these old fight poster t-shirts.
00:35:32.000 Really cool shit.
00:35:33.000 Excuse me.
00:35:34.000 And he's always wearing their stuff and he's coming in town to do something with them.
00:35:38.000 I know someone who worked with him on San Andreas and said he was a lovely dude.
00:35:41.000 Oh, he's supposed to be the best guy ever.
00:35:42.000 Super friendly, knew everyone's name, really accommodating.
00:35:45.000 Well, he's the real deal.
00:35:47.000 Like, he really does get up at 5 o'clock in the morning and work out before the set.
00:35:50.000 You know, he takes all these Instagram photos.
00:35:52.000 He's, like, the most inspirational guy when it comes to, like, getting shit done.
00:35:56.000 Yeah.
00:35:56.000 Because he just gets shit done, you know?
00:35:58.000 Yeah, he's a beast as well.
00:35:59.000 Yeah, he's a fucking animal.
00:36:00.000 He's making it happen.
00:36:01.000 There he is.
00:36:01.000 Sam Owen, right?
00:36:03.000 Sam, and he has some genetic stuff that helps.
00:36:04.000 Oh, he's definitely got some genetics.
00:36:06.000 I mean, he's a giant dude.
00:36:07.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:36:08.000 He's a fucking animal, man.
00:36:09.000 But he's very motivated.
00:36:11.000 See that shirt that he's wearing?
00:36:12.000 That's a Roots of Fight shirt.
00:36:13.000 That's a Muay Thai.
00:36:14.000 That's a tight.
00:36:15.000 Yeah.
00:36:16.000 Yeah, they have a lot of really cool, old-school, different, like, fight posters from, like, Muhammad Ali versus Joe Frazier, Thrilling Manila, like that kind of shit.
00:36:26.000 Like, he's, you know, if I were to see a guy that big on the street like that...
00:36:30.000 It would be kind of freakish, but for some reason The Rock pulls it off.
00:36:34.000 He's very proportionate, huh?
00:36:36.000 Yeah, he knows what he's doing.
00:36:37.000 If you scroll down lower, that's another Roots of Fight shirt.
00:36:39.000 Scroll down lower, that Jun Fan Gung, that's a Bruce Lee shirt.
00:36:44.000 He's got a bunch of these.
00:36:46.000 He's an animal.
00:36:47.000 Yeah, he is.
00:36:48.000 AM cardio.
00:36:49.000 Yeah.
00:36:50.000 He's a fucking animal.
00:36:51.000 Good for him.
00:36:52.000 Yeah, I mean, look, there are people like that.
00:36:54.000 Like, you know who Kevin Hart is, stand-up comedian?
00:36:57.000 He's another one, very inspirational.
00:36:59.000 What, for working out?
00:37:00.000 The guy's always doing something.
00:37:02.000 He's up at 5 o'clock in the morning.
00:37:04.000 Yeah, he makes these little videos of him doing...
00:37:06.000 He's in very good shape.
00:37:08.000 He works out every fucking day.
00:37:10.000 Wow.
00:37:10.000 And he puts Instagram photos of him.
00:37:12.000 And he's a comedian.
00:37:13.000 He's constantly getting things done.
00:37:15.000 I don't think they've found the right vehicle for him yet.
00:37:17.000 No.
00:37:18.000 Well, his stand-up is the right vehicle for him.
00:37:20.000 All those other things, the movies and everything, it's great, just making him more famous and bigger, but his stand-up is where it's at.
00:37:26.000 Yeah, he's got to find it.
00:37:28.000 I'm friends with Kimmel.
00:37:29.000 Kimmel's always impressed me just in terms of knowing what his day's like, but also the fact that he'll reply to me pretty quickly.
00:37:38.000 I'm like, dude, aren't you doing 15 things at the time?
00:37:41.000 He's like, well, yeah, I am, but you're the 16th thing that I can do.
00:37:45.000 I'm just really impressed by his...
00:37:48.000 Work ethic and it's very often the same, the routine of going into the studio and going in the writers room and Breaking jokes and doing the monologue and all that kind of stuff.
00:37:57.000 It's the same every day, but he's still motivated to do it.
00:38:00.000 And he's brilliant, and he knows what's funny, and he knows what a joke is.
00:38:03.000 And I don't know, all the late-night talk show hosts that I've had the opportunity to meet, I've always thought, there's something brilliant about you, you know?
00:38:13.000 There's something brilliant about working in that medium, you know?
00:38:17.000 It's...
00:38:19.000 Current and edgy and what they're doing at times can be a little risky and dangerous and stuff, but they're willing to get up the next day and do it again and get up the next day and not get pounded down in the same way that other people...
00:38:35.000 Might.
00:38:35.000 Yeah, that's their thing.
00:38:37.000 You know, I mean, that's what Jimmy Kimmel is best at.
00:38:40.000 He's got, obviously, he's got fantastic work ethic, and he's obviously a brilliant guy, but that's like what he wants to do.
00:38:45.000 That's his thing.
00:38:46.000 You know, like, it works for him.
00:38:48.000 It's a beautiful gig, too, because you can never rest on your laurels, because it doesn't matter.
00:38:53.000 Tomorrow there's another show.
00:38:54.000 That show has to be good as well.
00:38:55.000 And you need new jokes, and you need new sketches, and you need new gags to pull off, and you have new guests to review and to go over what they're talking about.
00:39:03.000 Yeah.
00:39:04.000 And he's done a lot of jumping up, Jimmy, in a way that I really respect.
00:39:08.000 Like, I did his show a long time ago, maybe 12 years ago, and at that point, you know, his hair's different, he's a little bigger, they've not quite got his suits to fit yet, the whole facade of the show, you know, was being worked on.
00:39:22.000 But Jimmy, I think his drive and maybe the drive of the people that he surrounds himself with, you know, he jumped up when he did the Matt Damon thing.
00:39:29.000 He jumped up when he interviewed Obama.
00:39:31.000 He jumped up when he, you know, sorted out his hair and, you know, kind of dropped a few pounds and sorted out his suit.
00:39:37.000 Like he has a drive.
00:39:39.000 There's no sense of complacency with Jimmy.
00:39:42.000 And I find that seems to be relatively concurrent with Talk show hosts.
00:39:47.000 Conan's like that.
00:39:48.000 He's always reaching.
00:39:49.000 He's never like, okay, we're done.
00:39:50.000 This is the show.
00:39:51.000 Let's just dial it in.
00:39:52.000 He's reaching.
00:39:53.000 I appreciate watching people reach.
00:39:55.000 It's why I'm a huge fan of athletes in general.
00:39:58.000 I always feel like athletes are always trying for that next thing.
00:40:01.000 Yeah.
00:40:02.000 It's finding comfort and happiness in that struggle.
00:40:07.000 Enjoying that process.
00:40:08.000 It's very difficult for people.
00:40:10.000 And for some people, the monotony of showing up and doing it all over again that wears on them.
00:40:15.000 It's really just about finding whatever the fuck it is for you.
00:40:18.000 For some people, it's not that.
00:40:20.000 For some people, they've got to go to...
00:40:21.000 Anthony Bourdain is an interesting cat.
00:40:24.000 You had him on the show?
00:40:25.000 Yeah, a while ago.
00:40:27.000 I've talked to him a gang of times at UFCs.
00:40:30.000 He's a huge UFC fan.
00:40:31.000 Yeah, his wife's a fire, right?
00:40:32.000 Well, his wife trains.
00:40:33.000 I don't think she's she's competed in jujitsu tournaments, but she's a madman mad woman rather and He's doing it now as well.
00:40:41.000 He's doing jujitsu now But the point being that he's a guy that doesn't feel like he if he's home for a week or two He's like I gotta get the fuck out of here.
00:40:49.000 He just constantly wants to go to Libya or Africa or China just what he just wants to experience it at all and his work is Going to places and experiencing these completely different worlds.
00:41:04.000 That's where it's at for him.
00:41:06.000 So he's got a totally unique way of being ambitious.
00:41:11.000 Very different than like a talk show host would show up in the same writer's room and drink the coffee and bang up the jokes.
00:41:18.000 And he's just as ambitious, but his ambition is to go to Moscow and try their food and talk to their people.
00:41:24.000 Yeah, and he also, I don't know him at all, I think he's fantastic.
00:41:28.000 I read Kitchen Confidential years ago when it first came out, and I thought, wow, this guy's insane, and then obviously he blew up on TV. He also has a through line of an addict in his work.
00:41:38.000 He was an ex-addict.
00:41:39.000 He holds his hands up and says that.
00:41:41.000 I think when you meet a lot of ex-addicts, or even addicts, they have that thing that they're doing which completely takes hold of their life, which is stopping them from doing it.
00:41:51.000 The drug that they're addicted to.
00:41:53.000 And they can't...
00:41:54.000 If they chill and relax, then that demon's going to come in and hang out with them.
00:41:58.000 So I think Bourdain's like, well, if I spend 10 days at home, maybe that monster's going to come out, so he has to keep moving.
00:42:04.000 You know?
00:42:05.000 Yeah.
00:42:05.000 I don't know him well enough to know if that's true or not, but I know enough addicts that say, I have to be on the new thing.
00:42:12.000 I have to be moving to the new place.
00:42:14.000 Your character was an addict.
00:42:15.000 Right.
00:42:16.000 Did you do a lot of research about that?
00:42:19.000 They didn't ask me to, but I've had my own fun, positive, great journey with drugs in my life.
00:42:28.000 It's like that great Bill Hicks joke where he's like, I had a great time on drugs.
00:42:33.000 Not to tell people to do drugs.
00:42:37.000 I think it's a very, very personal thing.
00:42:38.000 I was lucky enough to come from a family background that was very...
00:42:45.000 Consistent and there, you know, my parents have been married for 42 years.
00:42:50.000 I always came back to a household where dinner was on the table, regardless if I ate it or not.
00:42:56.000 You know, a foundation of something that I think made me feel secure.
00:43:02.000 Got interested, was always interested in music, got interested in the Beatles when I was about 12, 13. Started reading up about them and read that Rubber Soul and Sgt. Pepper's and The White Album were very much influenced by drugs and thought,
00:43:18.000 oh, that's interesting because I feel artistic and I'd like to see if I can make that artistic flower bloom a little bit.
00:43:26.000 And at that point, me and three other Beatles fans at my school started to seek out marijuana, which we ended up getting a hold of and did that atypical thing when your kids were You know, you all smoke a joint in two and a half minutes and everyone feels lightheaded and one of them pukes and then you get nervous and paranoid and you run off and you think you're never going to do it again and then you do it again and then you do it again and at one point you're like,
00:43:51.000 oh, it hit, you know?
00:43:55.000 So I did that.
00:43:57.000 I mean, fuck, I remember...
00:43:59.000 I'm a very dedicated worker.
00:44:02.000 You know, obviously I never do drugs when I'm working.
00:44:06.000 But in my downtime, my weekends, I might do that.
00:44:09.000 And I flew my brother out to New Zealand to come check us all out making Lord of the Rings.
00:44:15.000 At the time, I was heavily into marijuana, probably the most I was into it in my life.
00:44:20.000 And I would roll like 20 joints and put them in a cigarette box.
00:44:24.000 I never smoked cigarettes.
00:44:25.000 Put them in a cigarette box that someone had given to me.
00:44:27.000 And I would just walk around the house just smoking joints like I'm smoking cigarettes.
00:44:31.000 And my brother, who's only 16 months older than me, sat me down at one point in that trip and he was like, I've never seen anyone smoke as much weed as you.
00:44:37.000 And how are you functioning?
00:44:39.000 And maybe you should consider not doing it.
00:44:40.000 And I was a highly functioning stoner.
00:44:42.000 I was like, I'm fine, come on, let's go.
00:44:44.000 And that's, you know, that's gone in different journeys in my life.
00:44:48.000 So I think when I met JJ, I had spent...
00:44:52.000 Hello.
00:44:53.000 I had spent, um...
00:44:56.000 18 months in LA having not worked, exposing myself to LA for the first time, and not necessarily on the biggest party scene, but certainly on a bit of a party scene, hanging out with the wrong people, the wrong women.
00:45:11.000 And I think G.A.J.'s perceptive enough to probably see when I came into a meeting, like, He's a bit rough around the edges.
00:45:19.000 He didn't shave.
00:45:20.000 He knows what it means to have a hangover.
00:45:22.000 He knows what it means when we say certain buzzwords, so he could have danced in these arenas.
00:45:29.000 So, yeah.
00:45:31.000 It's a cautionary tale, I think, Drugs, and I'm really careful about it.
00:45:37.000 I'm aware that there are young people who might follow me on Twitter or might follow me on Instagram that That would think, oh, well, if he's done it, it's okay, and I don't subscribe to that at all.
00:45:49.000 I think you have to have your own journey and you have to have your own experiences, but the abuse of drugs has never been something that's been in my life.
00:45:57.000 The usage of drugs has been something that I've done.
00:46:00.000 More often than not, if I'm partaking in some sort of drug, I have a notebook and a pen close enough by me so that if I feel like I'm inventing the future, I can write it down, and in the morning when I wake up, I can be like, oh, there's a positive element of...
00:46:13.000 That thing that I took, you know?
00:46:16.000 I like searching for stuff.
00:46:18.000 I think searching for stuff in that world can be quite significant.
00:46:23.000 Well, that's a very honest interpretation or a very honest expression of what drugs or some drugs can be.
00:46:31.000 I think one of the problems with someone seeing you on social media or some young kid saying, well, if he takes them, I could take them.
00:46:39.000 They're okay.
00:46:39.000 And the only reason why they would have that thought at all is because they've been lied to so much.
00:46:44.000 There's so much bullshit on TV. There's so much...
00:46:46.000 Nancy Grace and nonsense and, you know, marijuana is more dangerous today than at any time in the past.
00:46:54.000 Still marijuana.
00:46:55.000 At the end of the day, it's just pot.
00:46:56.000 Nobody's dying.
00:46:57.000 Nothing happens.
00:46:58.000 You get paranoid.
00:46:59.000 You wake up.
00:47:00.000 You're fine.
00:47:00.000 No hangover.
00:47:01.000 Your bones don't ache.
00:47:02.000 You're really okay.
00:47:03.000 No one died under an overdose of marijuana in the history of the planet.
00:47:06.000 Yeah.
00:47:07.000 You saying that, like, you used to abuse it.
00:47:09.000 It's like, even your abuse.
00:47:11.000 Look, you're functioning.
00:47:12.000 You're running around.
00:47:13.000 You're not throwing up in your own bed and, you know...
00:47:16.000 No, and I've had several moments in my life where I've said, okay, go flush that.
00:47:25.000 Like, you did it last night.
00:47:27.000 You don't need to do it tonight.
00:47:28.000 You don't need to do it tomorrow night.
00:47:29.000 Really?
00:47:30.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:47:30.000 It's Thursday night.
00:47:31.000 You're moving into Friday night.
00:47:32.000 You're not doing anything tonight.
00:47:33.000 You know that little monster's going to be in that drawer.
00:47:36.000 Flush it.
00:47:37.000 But it's only been pot.
00:47:38.000 No, no, it's been everything.
00:47:40.000 Oh, okay.
00:47:41.000 Okay.
00:47:42.000 No, it's been everything.
00:47:43.000 I was like, that's a weird one to taunt you.
00:47:45.000 No.
00:47:45.000 Because it doesn't usually taunt people.
00:47:47.000 I mean, I find the friends that I have that I believe, you know, I would classify as addicted to marijuana.
00:47:53.000 They do it because, like, that's what they think they do.
00:47:56.000 They get up and they do it because it's almost like it certainly can be an escape.
00:48:01.000 But it's also a comfort in a lot of ways.
00:48:04.000 It's like that thing that you do, like coffee.
00:48:06.000 I have friends that can't get coffee, you know, they're like, fuck, I get up in the morning, I need that cup of coffee.
00:48:11.000 It's like a ritualistic, comforting sort of a thing that they do.
00:48:15.000 I mean, another way to describe it would be a crutch, right?
00:48:18.000 And that is a negative connotation.
00:48:20.000 You don't necessarily want something in your life that is a crutch, whether that is...
00:48:24.000 Marijuana or cocaine or having to call your mom every day or needing to have the new Levi's, whatever that is.
00:48:29.000 If it's a crutch, it's not good.
00:48:30.000 If we're just talking about weed, the best times for me on weed have been ingesting it.
00:48:36.000 I don't tend to smoke it anymore.
00:48:37.000 I put it in brownies.
00:48:39.000 Ingesting it in a way that makes the next experience that I'm going to have much more colorful.
00:48:43.000 Surfing on weed is a beautiful experience.
00:48:46.000 You're in that flow.
00:48:47.000 You're in that rhythm, you know.
00:48:48.000 Watching a movie that you really like, listening to a new album, I mean, dude, like, I still am in love with the band Sigurås, you know Sigurås?
00:48:55.000 No.
00:48:56.000 Icelandic band, they're kind of referred to as the Icelandic radiohead.
00:49:00.000 S-I-G-U-R, R-O-S, separate word.
00:49:06.000 Yeah, Sigurås.
00:49:07.000 Wait, S-I-G-U-R, and then a separate word, R-O-S. So it's Sigurås, U-R, separate word, R-O-S. Their first album has an alien fetus on the front cover.
00:49:19.000 Standard shit.
00:49:20.000 Yeah.
00:49:21.000 I'm an atheist, and I've always, you know, explored and struggled with the idea of God concepts, but...
00:49:31.000 I've always thought, if there is a heaven, they're playing Sigur Rós.
00:49:35.000 It is the most truly, like, captivating...
00:49:41.000 There you go, there's the album you want, Joe.
00:49:44.000 Wow, okay.
00:49:45.000 So cool.
00:49:46.000 I'll listen to it on the way home.
00:49:47.000 Oh, it's so rad.
00:49:48.000 I just love that I could do that.
00:49:49.000 I could just order that shit up on my phone and listen to it on the way home.
00:49:53.000 I don't even have to do it now and download it.
00:49:55.000 I could sit in my car, look at it on iTunes, plug it into the dash, and then it'll start playing.
00:50:00.000 Yeah, that's very cool, the society that we live in for that.
00:50:03.000 So beautiful.
00:50:04.000 But I have an issue with the cloud.
00:50:06.000 I don't like this cloud thing.
00:50:08.000 There's a lot of weirdness.
00:50:09.000 There's definitely a lot of weirdness in the whole idea of the cloud.
00:50:13.000 You know, that fappening that happened and all these poor folks that had their porn up there got exposed.
00:50:19.000 I think that's a tiny tremor that will lead to the ultimate earthquake that evades or erases privacy, rather.
00:50:28.000 Yeah, it killed the cloud in a lot of different ways, that fappening thing, but also like...
00:50:32.000 Not for the dudes who jerked off like wild monkeys.
00:50:35.000 It was awesome.
00:50:36.000 Yeah, that's true.
00:50:38.000 As I look over at Jamie, Jamie's got a fat hard drive filled with fappening content.
00:50:45.000 But like, if I really like a film and I watch it, if it's streaming, if I'm watching it on Netflix, if I really like that film, guaranteed I'm going to buy it.
00:50:52.000 I'm going to go buy it on DVD because I want the actual article.
00:50:55.000 I want it in my house and the same with music.
00:50:59.000 If I like an album, I'm going to go buy that CD. And I don't want that medium to die, you know?
00:51:04.000 I want it.
00:51:04.000 I don't think it's going to die.
00:51:06.000 I was at the bookstore the other day with my mother-in-law and she was talking about Zeppelin, House of the Holy was there and they're selling like these new vinyl versions of Houses of the Holy and like Barnes and Noble and Thousand Oaks.
00:51:21.000 They have all these fucking, these albums.
00:51:24.000 It's wild.
00:51:25.000 These are 1960s, 1970s albums, and people are buying records and turntables, and they're getting into the actual physical medium again, opening it up, and it's cool.
00:51:37.000 Yeah, I think the vinyl culture is really fantastic, and that is great that the vinyl thing kind of came back around again.
00:51:43.000 I do think that...
00:51:45.000 Those select artists that make their way onto vinyl, your Jimi Hendrix's, your Elvis's, your Led Zeppelin's, your Beatles, they'll always be around.
00:51:53.000 But the smaller ones, they're going to be like, well, he's not big enough to go on vinyl, so let's just put him on digital.
00:51:58.000 Someone's going to want him, we'll put him on digital and that's it.
00:52:00.000 It makes me sad that there are albums that I own that if I break that CD, it's going to be very difficult for me to get it unless I pay $69.99 on eBay and then I get a copy that's been previously used.
00:52:11.000 Yeah, some comic.
00:52:12.000 Bill Burr released a Carnegie Hall special that he did on album as a vinyl thing.
00:52:18.000 I think that's kind of cool.
00:52:19.000 So when I was a kid, that was a big thing, was listening to Cheech and Chong and Bill Cosby, unfortunately, rest in peace.
00:52:26.000 Still funny.
00:52:26.000 I say rest in peace, because the real Bill Cosby's dead.
00:52:29.000 Sure.
00:52:30.000 Still funny, though.
00:52:31.000 Still funny.
00:52:31.000 Oh, yeah.
00:52:32.000 He was very funny.
00:52:33.000 I mean...
00:52:34.000 That, to me, is one of the most fascinating, I say, you could say scandals, tragedies, horrific crimes, whatever it is, whatever you want to call it, but that that guy turned out to be a rapist, and not just a rapist,
00:52:51.000 but a guy who would drug people and fuck them while they're unconscious.
00:52:54.000 That guy was that.
00:52:56.000 That still bends my brain, man.
00:52:58.000 It's a profound fall from grace.
00:53:01.000 It's not just a fall from grace.
00:53:03.000 It's horrific.
00:53:07.000 It twists the world.
00:53:09.000 The world's not the same world anymore.
00:53:11.000 Bill Cosby's a rapist.
00:53:14.000 The world's not the same anymore.
00:53:16.000 Bill Cosby was the fucking...
00:53:17.000 He was the Huxtable dad.
00:53:19.000 He was this guy that was telling everybody to not swear.
00:53:24.000 He was the jello pudding guy.
00:53:25.000 He was the family guy.
00:53:27.000 He's the guy that you want to pick you up and sit on your knee and give you a life lesson.
00:53:30.000 Now you don't want him to sit you on his knee.
00:53:32.000 Yeah.
00:53:33.000 Or if you do, you fucking don't drink anything he hands you.
00:53:36.000 When I was a kid, we used to listen to that album where he would talk about Noah and the Ark.
00:53:42.000 Like, you know, Noah having that conversation with God where God would say, Noah, it's God.
00:53:47.000 Right.
00:53:48.000 You know, like it was a great bit, man.
00:53:50.000 It was a great bit with Noah not believing that God really wanted him to go out and build this Ark.
00:53:55.000 Right.
00:53:55.000 It's just, that was how we listened to comedy.
00:53:59.000 We would all sit around, and we'd put headphones on, and we would all sit around and listen to this, you know, whether it's Cheech and Chong, or we got a hold of some old George Carlin back then.
00:54:10.000 Yeah, oh my god.
00:54:12.000 So dangerous, so edgy, so brave, that guy.
00:54:14.000 It wasn't in the beginning, you know?
00:54:16.000 This is an interesting lesson.
00:54:18.000 If you go see George Carlin's The Early, Early, Early Stuff, it was like straight-up Tonight Show, TV-friendly comedy.
00:54:25.000 And somewhere along the line, he just got kind of twisted.
00:54:28.000 Well, I never knew him, never met him.
00:54:31.000 I get the feeling that he got angry about something and stopped giving a shit, and that's where his real voice came from.
00:54:37.000 He was just like, fuck this world, man.
00:54:39.000 I'm not going to get famous.
00:54:40.000 I'm not going to have my own late-night talk show.
00:54:42.000 Let's do it.
00:54:42.000 Yeah, I don't know if that's what his goal was, or who knows.
00:54:46.000 Whatever it was.
00:54:47.000 Like, Bill Hicks was a little bit like that, right?
00:54:48.000 I mean, he was great, his material was fantastic, but there was a point where he was like, fuck this.
00:54:53.000 Like, I see the fucking rip in the universe.
00:54:55.000 I see it.
00:54:56.000 And now I'm going to point it out to all you guys.
00:54:58.000 He didn't have a chance, unfortunately.
00:55:00.000 He died so young.
00:55:01.000 I met him high, but never hung out and talked to him.
00:55:06.000 Same with Carlin.
00:55:06.000 I met him like, hi, at the store, passing by.
00:55:09.000 He was very friendly.
00:55:10.000 Hello, hello, hello.
00:55:11.000 So epic.
00:55:13.000 I got to see Hicks live when I was an open-miker, which was a great, great, great chance to see one of the all-time greats in the beginning of my career.
00:55:23.000 And I got to see him bomb.
00:55:25.000 Oh, wow.
00:55:25.000 I got to see him bomb and not give a fuck.
00:55:27.000 It was me and Greg Fitzsimmons and a few other comics in the back of the room.
00:55:31.000 There was maybe 250, 300 people in the room when he started.
00:55:34.000 And by the time he was done, there was 50. And we were all howling.
00:55:38.000 Was he just screaming at the moon?
00:55:40.000 He was bombing.
00:55:41.000 You know, it wasn't going, but the comics were laughing hard.
00:55:45.000 We were laughing hard, and a few people were laughing hard.
00:55:48.000 And then there's a few people in the audience that was trying to figure out what everybody was laughing at that stuck around and tried to see if, like, am I missing out on something cool here?
00:55:55.000 Yes, you are.
00:55:56.000 Yeah, it was, he went on after a guy who was, like, really hacky.
00:56:00.000 The guy who went on before him was, like, he was doing impressions of cartoon characters if they smoke marijuana.
00:56:05.000 You know, it was, like, real standard, like, I mean, like, straight across the board, like, cop donut jokes, like that kind of shit.
00:56:12.000 Yeah.
00:56:12.000 And the audience was, you know, fairly dimwitted.
00:56:16.000 And they were enjoying this really stupid comedy.
00:56:18.000 And then Hicks came out and just did all this really radical, crazy shit that they just weren't hearing it.
00:56:25.000 They just got up.
00:56:26.000 Sometimes it's difficult to be in the presence of genius, right?
00:56:29.000 I mean, in terms of his stand-up, I think he was genius.
00:56:31.000 There's an absolutely phenomenal Rolling Stone interview with John Lennon, with the guy who invented Rolling Stone, Jan Wenner.
00:56:38.000 It's like...
00:56:39.000 Well, the edited version is about 40 minutes.
00:56:41.000 I've got about three hours of it.
00:56:43.000 And Lennon gets angry about the fact that he's a genius and he's having to perform like a clown in front of these fucking retards that don't get it.
00:56:51.000 And he resents it.
00:56:52.000 Like, I resent the fact that they're not receiving it.
00:56:55.000 And they're also telling me that my art is X, Y, and Z. You don't get to fucking tell me what my art is.
00:57:00.000 I'm the artist.
00:57:01.000 You just sit there and fucking listen to it.
00:57:04.000 Or not.
00:57:04.000 Right.
00:57:05.000 I appreciate that you're never going to get it, you know.
00:57:07.000 I think the Hicks thing, what was going on was that he hadn't found those people yet.
00:57:11.000 This was all pre-internet.
00:57:13.000 So no one knew what he was doing.
00:57:16.000 So they were going to go see a guy who was a funny comedian.
00:57:19.000 And they had seen him on the Rodney Dangerfield Comic special on HBO, and he only did like seven minutes on that or whatever the hell it was, whatever they would do.
00:57:28.000 It was a very small, short, funny set, but it was funny, a bunch of jokes.
00:57:32.000 And so people went to see him a lot based on that, and they went to see him.
00:57:37.000 They're like, what the fuck is all this?
00:57:39.000 He hadn't really found that audience yet, and then he died, unfortunately.
00:57:43.000 Huge in England.
00:57:45.000 Biggest stand-up comedian in England for probably four years.
00:57:47.000 He won the Perrier Award, which is at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
00:57:51.000 And he was huge.
00:57:52.000 By the time he died, he was the Jim Morrison of stand-up comedy for us.
00:57:56.000 Well, he did Relentless.
00:57:58.000 He filmed it live in England.
00:58:00.000 And a very risky thing to do.
00:58:03.000 It wasn't his best special.
00:58:04.000 He was very tight.
00:58:05.000 And one of the reasons is because it was all one take.
00:58:08.000 It was one show, one take.
00:58:11.000 And, you know, it's an HBO special.
00:58:13.000 So it's a...
00:58:15.000 But, again, he was a guy that, like, if he found his audience, if, like, they knew where to go, you know, like, today, if he was alive today, my God, he would have just a fucking monster following.
00:58:25.000 He'd be the king.
00:58:26.000 Yeah.
00:58:27.000 Or one of the kings, you know, I mean, it's like...
00:58:31.000 It's just finding, then we'd find out that he's drugging jerks.
00:58:35.000 Yeah.
00:58:37.000 Yeah, that's right.
00:58:38.000 No, probably not.
00:58:39.000 I mean, I love what Louis C.K. is doing right now.
00:58:41.000 I mean, he's an exceptional writer.
00:58:44.000 He's very artistic.
00:58:47.000 He's very on the edge.
00:58:50.000 I mean, he comes up with the joke and then he retires it and that's it.
00:58:54.000 I mean, he's coming up with new stuff.
00:58:55.000 I think...
00:58:56.000 I think he's fantastic.
00:58:58.000 And the fact that he edits and writes and directs and produces and stars in his show, brilliant.
00:59:02.000 He's obviously a phenomenal artist.
00:59:05.000 I'm okay with darkness, and I know what the darkness is for me.
00:59:10.000 There are moments where I'm watching a show where I'm like, oh, that's too dark.
00:59:15.000 Oh, his TV show?
00:59:16.000 Yeah.
00:59:16.000 He's like, it's two dogs.
00:59:17.000 Yeah, the TV show.
00:59:18.000 I'm not a big fan of, like, depressing shit.
00:59:21.000 I'm not, I don't want to watch that kind.
00:59:24.000 Yeah.
00:59:24.000 Like, he's getting frustrated.
00:59:26.000 He's fixing his kid's doll.
00:59:28.000 You know, it's like, and I was like, oh, no.
00:59:30.000 And, you know, the overlying themes of, like, you're, this is never going to get any better.
00:59:35.000 Yeah.
00:59:35.000 You're fucked.
00:59:36.000 You're never going to find someone who loves you again.
00:59:38.000 I don't buy into that.
00:59:39.000 You're a bad father.
00:59:40.000 We'll watch it.
00:59:41.000 It's dark.
00:59:42.000 It's heavy.
00:59:43.000 Yeah, but he minds that, you know, and comes up with great, hilarious shit from that.
00:59:48.000 It's just, it's one of those things.
00:59:49.000 Like, everybody's got their own little fucking thing.
00:59:51.000 Have you ever seen Joey Diaz?
00:59:53.000 No, but I heard him on your show.
00:59:54.000 Fuck.
00:59:55.000 Yeah, he's funny as hell.
00:59:56.000 You gotta see that guy live.
00:59:57.000 What's his vibe, stand-up-wise?
00:59:58.000 He's a monster.
01:00:00.000 He's the funniest guy that's ever lived.
01:00:01.000 I heard you say that on the show.
01:00:02.000 I've never seen anybody funnier.
01:00:04.000 I've never seen anybody who kills so hard.
01:00:06.000 So what's his...
01:00:07.000 I mean, is he...
01:00:07.000 He's just an animal.
01:00:08.000 He's a 350-pound...
01:00:08.000 Is he a joke animal?
01:00:09.000 Is he a story animal?
01:00:10.000 He's got great jokes, great stories.
01:00:12.000 He's just a wild fucker who's been through everything.
01:00:15.000 He's been to jail for armed kidnapping, was a cocaine addict for most of his life.
01:00:20.000 He's just a fucking bonafide gangster.
01:00:23.000 Do you think that's where it comes from?
01:00:25.000 100%.
01:00:25.000 Doesn't give any fucks.
01:00:26.000 He has zero fucks in his tank.
01:00:28.000 I mean, for real, like, there's a lot of people tell you they don't give a fuck, but they do.
01:00:32.000 He really doesn't give a fuck.
01:00:34.000 You know, I mean, he gives a fuck about his friends and his family and, you know, what he's doing.
01:00:38.000 But he's free, you know, because he's got his own podcast.
01:00:42.000 He sells out everywhere he goes doing stand-up.
01:00:44.000 He doesn't give a fuck.
01:00:45.000 He doesn't want to do anything other than that.
01:00:47.000 You know, that's just what he does.
01:00:49.000 But before he goes, before he leaves this earth, you got to see him.
01:00:53.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:00:54.000 He plays LA often?
01:00:55.000 All the time, yeah.
01:00:56.000 I'll let you know.
01:00:57.000 I'll find out when he's going to be around.
01:00:59.000 You've got to come see him.
01:01:00.000 I love stand-up.
01:01:01.000 I mean, you know, I just love that medium.
01:01:04.000 I think it's really...
01:01:06.000 It's super brave and I think a lot of people don't necessarily know the mechanics of how a comedian found himself being on stage with a microphone.
01:01:18.000 And if anyone did know that, people would shut the fuck up and laugh or just politely leave.
01:01:23.000 Because the disrespect shown by hecklers to stand up comedians where you're like, do you have any idea how ballsy it is to get up on stage and show your ass like that all the time?
01:01:32.000 But you know what that is, man?
01:01:33.000 It's the same thing as people that are haters on Twitter or Facebook.
01:01:37.000 It's just too easy to do so.
01:01:39.000 It's too easy to speak up.
01:01:41.000 It's too easy to just have an opinion that's not nuanced and not objective.
01:01:47.000 It's too easy.
01:01:48.000 You're shit!
01:01:49.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:01:49.000 It's so easy to do that.
01:01:51.000 It's so easy to be that dummy.
01:01:53.000 I mean, there was that guy the other day at the comedy store.
01:01:56.000 Were you there?
01:01:56.000 Those fucking guys were drunk in the back of the parking lot, give everybody a hard time.
01:02:00.000 There's just so many of them, and they're just dim-witted, dumb people that they shouldn't have that ability to speak to you, but they do.
01:02:08.000 So there they are.
01:02:10.000 They're not smart, they're not sensitive, they're not thinking, but they're like, fuck you, fuck you.
01:02:16.000 How do you deal with hecklers?
01:02:17.000 I mean, like, you're a little imposing, so I would imagine people heckle you a little less, right?
01:02:23.000 No, you get heckled.
01:02:24.000 You get heckled all the time.
01:02:25.000 Everybody gets heckled.
01:02:25.000 People get drunk.
01:02:26.000 They're not thinking straight.
01:02:27.000 They're not thinking, like, maybe this guy could kill me.
01:02:30.000 Maybe I should shut the fuck up.
01:02:31.000 They don't think like that.
01:02:32.000 Do you call them out?
01:02:32.000 Do you have fun with them?
01:02:34.000 Depends.
01:02:34.000 It's like there's no...
01:02:36.000 Like, some heckling is funny.
01:02:38.000 Gotta respect it.
01:02:40.000 One time I was on stage in New York and I said, do you know who the most famous woman in the world is?
01:02:45.000 It was a bit about Kim Kardashian meeting the aliens.
01:02:48.000 If aliens came down and they met Kim Kardashian and they had to explain Like, Kim Kardashian's existence and her fame.
01:02:57.000 Like, why is this girl famous?
01:02:58.000 If anybody had to explain it, how the aliens would feel.
01:03:01.000 And I said, think about who is the most famous woman in the world?
01:03:04.000 And some guy goes, your mom.
01:03:06.000 And I just started laughing.
01:03:07.000 Because it was fun.
01:03:08.000 It was in that moment.
01:03:09.000 It was a ridiculous, smart-ass, funny thing to say.
01:03:12.000 And it wasn't a guy who was heckling the whole show.
01:03:13.000 It was just like he said that one thing.
01:03:15.000 He just found a joke.
01:03:15.000 And then I started laughing, and everybody else was laughing.
01:03:17.000 I'm like, we'll just let that slide.
01:03:18.000 That was very funny.
01:03:20.000 Sometimes it's funny.
01:03:21.000 I don't encourage it.
01:03:23.000 You shouldn't do it.
01:03:24.000 But occasionally it works.
01:03:26.000 And that's not a mean-spirited thing.
01:03:28.000 It's like sometimes people, they want to be a part of it.
01:03:33.000 They get a little drunk.
01:03:35.000 They want to say something.
01:03:36.000 It's all different.
01:03:37.000 And then sometimes you just get morons.
01:03:40.000 Sometimes you can just get people that just really...
01:03:43.000 They don't deserve to be there.
01:03:45.000 They just can't handle the experience.
01:03:47.000 I've seen that as an audience member.
01:03:49.000 I've seen that where people are yelling out and you just want to grab them and drag them out of there.
01:03:53.000 Like, that guy on stage, you should not be talking.
01:03:56.000 You're fucking it up for the other 399 people in this fucking room.
01:04:00.000 You're so egocentric that you're concentrating on yourself and your own what you like and don't like.
01:04:05.000 They had a couple too many drinks at the restaurant.
01:04:06.000 They got talked into coming to the comedy club.
01:04:08.000 They don't know what it is.
01:04:10.000 Sure.
01:04:11.000 And they're like, shit, dark room and I'm supposed to shut up?
01:04:14.000 I was in the middle of talking at dinner.
01:04:15.000 I'm going to keep talking.
01:04:16.000 There's that.
01:04:16.000 There's alcohol, which really fucks with judgment.
01:04:19.000 And there's also...
01:04:19.000 A lot of people have this...
01:04:21.000 Really bizarre entitled thing where they're entitled to their opinions and they feel like this is something that they're allowed to, you know, they're allowed to voice their disproval about and you should stop.
01:04:32.000 I had a woman yell out next subject once to me.
01:04:36.000 Wow.
01:04:37.000 Which is hilarious.
01:04:38.000 No, I'm holding the microphone.
01:04:39.000 Well, there was this bit I was doing for a while about...
01:04:42.000 There was a thing called the Second Coming Project.
01:04:44.000 It was before genetics.
01:04:46.000 When they first started mapping out the human genome, there was these people that wanted to get DNA from the Shroud of Turin, and they wanted to try to clone Jesus.
01:04:56.000 And they thought that if they cloned Jesus, they'd bring him back, and that would be how Jesus would return.
01:05:03.000 And...
01:05:05.000 So my take on it was like, what if they brought Jesus back and he was retarded?
01:05:10.000 Cloning doesn't work.
01:05:12.000 You have to do it a lot of times in order to find an effective clone.
01:05:15.000 So the first one that you do, what if it comes out wacky?
01:05:18.000 What if he has Down syndrome?
01:05:19.000 Do you kill him?
01:05:21.000 And she's like, next subject!
01:05:24.000 And she was sitting in the front row looking, like, as if that's it.
01:05:27.000 Like, you're just gonna say that, and that just ends?
01:05:29.000 No, now you're the subject, stupid.
01:05:31.000 Right, right, right.
01:05:31.000 No, a magical, fictional Jewish zombie can't come back retarded.
01:05:36.000 Is that what you're saying?
01:05:37.000 Right, right.
01:05:37.000 Fuck off.
01:05:38.000 She's in the God Squad.
01:05:39.000 She can't handle it.
01:05:40.000 Lots of people in the God Squad can't handle that stuff.
01:05:42.000 It might not even be the God Squad.
01:05:44.000 It might just be in her very narrow view of the world, like Down Syndrome is an unacceptable subject, or religious, anything religious.
01:05:53.000 Like, I've heard people say, well, hey, man, as long as you don't talk about politics or religion, like, that's ridiculous.
01:05:59.000 Those are two things you should absolutely fucking talk about every chance you get, because one of the reasons why both of those dumb, retarded fucking things are still around in the same state they've always been around is because dummies like you don't talk about it.
01:06:11.000 Because you've locked it in this ideology box and tucked it away somewhere where you just talk about the Lakers and the fucking lawn and how long you think this drought's gonna last.
01:06:19.000 You don't want to talk about the fact that you're getting fucked and that you're being surrounded by children who believe in magic.
01:06:25.000 Right, right.
01:06:26.000 Yeah, surface stuff.
01:06:27.000 I mean, people are a little scared about that.
01:06:30.000 I mean, I feel like in comedy, nothing's off the table, right?
01:06:33.000 Nothing's off the table.
01:06:34.000 You can't.
01:06:35.000 It's all in the context.
01:06:35.000 It might not be funny.
01:06:36.000 Right.
01:06:36.000 It might not be funny, but even, like, Patrice O'Neill, the late, great Patrice O'Neill, had a really good point once where he was like, if someone goes on stage and offends you, they say something offends you, or if someone goes on stage and makes you laugh, Both of those things come from the same place.
01:06:53.000 They're both trying to make you laugh, but it doesn't always work.
01:06:57.000 The ideas that eventually become great bits, there's been nights...
01:07:02.000 I had some bits that eventually became closing bits, like bits that I had to close on because I couldn't follow them.
01:07:09.000 They were just too good for me.
01:07:11.000 All my other bits weren't as strong as them.
01:07:15.000 At one point in time, they would bomb.
01:07:17.000 When I was first developing them, I was like, how the fuck am I going to get this to work?
01:07:21.000 It's just too weird.
01:07:22.000 It's too fucked up.
01:07:23.000 It's too controversial.
01:07:25.000 It's not connecting with people.
01:07:27.000 Whatever the reason was.
01:07:28.000 And almost every bit sort of starts out in an embryonic stage of what it eventually becomes when it's a finished product.
01:07:35.000 And if it's a bit that's controversial and it starts out in this embryonic stage, you're like, next subject!
01:07:42.000 Stop!
01:07:43.000 Don't die!
01:07:44.000 You're missing the whole entire point of stand-up and you can't be here because you're a part as an audience member Every audience member is not just there.
01:07:52.000 You're not just seeing a show when you see stand-up You're in part of the creative process because the bits come alive in front of the crowd they evolve and change in front of the crowd and That's how they become something that eventually gets on television and becomes a special until that until it happens you You're in as much as the comic is.
01:08:12.000 You're in on it.
01:08:12.000 We need you.
01:08:13.000 If it wasn't for the audience, no jokes would ever come out right.
01:08:18.000 You wouldn't really exactly know the best way to do any of them.
01:08:22.000 You have to do them in front of people.
01:08:24.000 How do you feel about Seinfeld?
01:08:25.000 How do you feel about Jerry Seinfeld's stand-up?
01:08:28.000 He's a very funny stand-up.
01:08:29.000 I mean, he's a very good comic.
01:08:31.000 He's not my kind of stand-up.
01:08:33.000 You know, I prefer stand-ups who don't have any restrictions.
01:08:37.000 I don't like stand-ups that, you know, only, they don't use any swear words, they don't talk about sex, they don't talk about anything profound, everything is like real simple, straight across like losing socks in the dryer type shit.
01:08:51.000 I think he's brilliant.
01:08:54.000 I prefer a Bill Burr or a Louis C.K. or a Joey Diaz.
01:08:59.000 I go see Joey Diaz.
01:09:01.000 There's nothing that's off the table.
01:09:03.000 I'm seeing chaos.
01:09:05.000 And at the end of the show, you're fucking holding your body laughing.
01:09:08.000 And you're like, I can't believe...
01:09:09.000 He does this bit about eating a girl's pussy from behind and sticking your nose in her ass like a pigeon.
01:09:17.000 He's like, you gotta do the pigeon.
01:09:19.000 Yeah.
01:09:20.000 And he does this thing, like, I'm not doing it any justice.
01:09:24.000 I'm totally fucking up the whole...
01:09:25.000 You're like, that's not even funny.
01:09:26.000 This is the funniest guy ever?
01:09:27.000 You gotta see it.
01:09:28.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:09:29.000 But you leave...
01:09:30.000 And in his body and with his voice, it's funny.
01:09:32.000 Everything.
01:09:32.000 And it has to do with, you know, what was set up before that and where it got to.
01:09:37.000 He has this bit about the fucking Liberace HBO movie.
01:09:41.000 Yeah, loved it.
01:09:41.000 The one with Matt Damon and Kirk Douglas or Michael Douglas.
01:09:45.000 Michael Douglas, yeah.
01:09:45.000 It's one of the funniest bits I've ever seen in my life to a point where I'm holding my body to keep everything from breaking, from laughing too hard.
01:09:54.000 I like all strains of stand-up.
01:09:57.000 The thing, I totally hear you in terms of the limitations that Seinfeld gives himself that no profanity doesn't necessarily tell you a huge amount about himself.
01:10:07.000 It's all kind of abstract stuff.
01:10:08.000 I love words.
01:10:10.000 I'm a huge fan of words.
01:10:11.000 I love etymology.
01:10:13.000 I like studying words, the origin of words, all that kind of stuff.
01:10:15.000 He is a fantastic wordsmith.
01:10:17.000 And also, he's very, very specific.
01:10:21.000 Like, he will omit the word the if he doesn't need it because he examines the entire sentence.
01:10:28.000 I love the dedication to that.
01:10:30.000 I also love the freeform element of...
01:10:32.000 You know, what Hicks was doing, just anger coming at you, or Eddie Izzard is very kind of like just school of thought coming all over the place.
01:10:39.000 The thing that I love about Seinfeld might be the limitations that he gives himself, but also that idea of the choices that I'm making, I've made specifically for...
01:10:51.000 For this joke to work as correctly as I think.
01:10:54.000 And he's a professor of comedy, right?
01:10:57.000 I mean, he knows comedy.
01:10:58.000 He knows the history of comedy.
01:10:59.000 He knows what's funny.
01:10:59.000 He knows what's not funny.
01:11:01.000 And there is something very safe about him.
01:11:05.000 And I could bring my parents to see him.
01:11:07.000 And he is old school.
01:11:08.000 But for me, the fact that Seinfeld lives in this world of Joey Diaz's and...
01:11:13.000 Bill Burr's and Louis C.K.'s makes him almost like the last of a dying breed, you know?
01:11:19.000 And I do have a lot of respect for that.
01:11:20.000 Well, Gaffigan is very clean, although he's not the kind of wordsmith that Seinfeld is.
01:11:25.000 Gaffigan's a good.
01:11:27.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:11:29.000 Brian Regan is also very clean and very, very funny.
01:11:32.000 You know, but I hear you.
01:11:34.000 I mean, he's a master at economy of words, that's for sure.
01:11:38.000 There's definitely a rhythm to learning, like, when, you know, when to leave words in, when to add more words, when to have a pause, when to have no pause, and there's an art to that sort of creation of the bits.
01:11:52.000 He's definitely a master at that.
01:11:54.000 I love Sarah Silverman as well.
01:11:55.000 She knows words too.
01:11:56.000 She makes very specific words.
01:11:58.000 And, you know, she can be a little frisky and a little naughty, but obviously that's very disarming when, you know, you're kind of an attractive lady to get up and do that stuff.
01:12:06.000 I think she's brilliant.
01:12:08.000 And unfortunately, it is a very male, as a lot of society is, a very male-dominated job in the sense that I feel like if Sarah...
01:12:19.000 Was a guy, there's a chance she could be a little bigger than what she is now.
01:12:24.000 Some would argue the opposite.
01:12:25.000 Some would argue that female comics are judged on a curve and that the best comics, if you look at the best female comics that are alive today and compare them just bit for bit for the best male comics, you wouldn't really have them in the same category.
01:12:40.000 Yeah.
01:12:41.000 You think she can throw down with Louis C.K.? I feel like Sarah could.
01:12:43.000 Sarah's brilliant.
01:12:44.000 I mean, it's weird, like, I don't like seeing, you know, even though I said Joey Diaz is the best in the world, because I think he just makes me laugh the hardest, because that's like my style of comedy.
01:12:54.000 I love that crazy, chaotic style, but I don't, just take Joey out of the equation, I don't think there's a best, but I've seen Sarah.
01:13:02.000 Sarah was at the store two weeks ago, and she was fucking fantastic, just smashing, just fantastic.
01:13:10.000 But I've seen Burr do that.
01:13:12.000 Do you know Duncan Trussell?
01:13:13.000 Yep.
01:13:14.000 I've seen Duncan Trussell just fucking...
01:13:17.000 Doug Stanhope.
01:13:17.000 Doug Stanhope.
01:13:17.000 Destroy.
01:13:18.000 It's all about, you know, if they're in their groove, if they're, you know, and they're always recycling material.
01:13:24.000 So you catch them two years from now, it's going to be a totally different set, a totally different point of view, totally different place in their life, totally different perspective.
01:13:31.000 And I think, you know, as far as personal taste, it kind of ebbs and flows depending on where that person is at any point in their life.
01:13:39.000 Yeah.
01:13:39.000 I saw Doug stand up once at the comedy store and I was fucking bent over double laughing so hard at him.
01:13:44.000 And then there's a guy I've only seen once.
01:13:47.000 I don't even know if he's on the circuit anymore.
01:13:48.000 He's called Dov Davidoff.
01:13:49.000 Yeah, Dov Davidoff is around still.
01:13:51.000 That guy killed me one night.
01:13:53.000 And he was just cool as fuck.
01:13:55.000 He had a fucked up leather jacket, shaved his head, looked kind of like a little bit of a G. And his material was just excellent, you know.
01:14:02.000 So like you said, it's on any...
01:14:03.000 Yeah.
01:14:18.000 Yeah.
01:14:20.000 Yeah.
01:14:26.000 I love it.
01:14:55.000 Wow.
01:14:56.000 Love that stuff.
01:14:58.000 Yeah, Monty Python, they were definitely groundbreaking.
01:15:00.000 Insane.
01:15:01.000 Yeah.
01:15:01.000 Insane.
01:15:02.000 They did some pretty incredible shit.
01:15:05.000 Yeah.
01:15:05.000 And a lot of it still holds up, you know?
01:15:08.000 Totally.
01:15:08.000 I mean, you know, everyone talks about the parrot sketch.
01:15:11.000 Parrot sketch is fine, but for me, like, the argument sketch is one of my favorites.
01:15:14.000 There's one called Travel Agent, which is insane.
01:15:17.000 There's, you know, there's the fish dance.
01:15:19.000 You know the fish dance?
01:15:20.000 No.
01:15:20.000 Two people.
01:15:21.000 I think it's definitely Michael Palin.
01:15:23.000 Could be Graham Chapman.
01:15:25.000 Stood on the end of a pretty high canal.
01:15:28.000 One guy has two little fish, like kind of big sardines.
01:15:34.000 They're about that big.
01:15:35.000 And he skips over to Michael Palin, slaps him in the face a couple of times, skips back.
01:15:41.000 Skips over to Michael Palin, slaps him in the face a couple of times with these fish, skips back.
01:15:44.000 And then the other guy, and then he's finished, and he stands still, and the other guy pulls out a fucking huge trout and just takes him out and throws him in the canal.
01:15:51.000 It's like completely silence, done to music.
01:15:54.000 It's fucking hilarious, man.
01:15:56.000 I've seen that.
01:15:57.000 They're so anarchic and stupid, you know.
01:15:59.000 How long have you been living in America?
01:16:01.000 I moved to L.A. in 2003. So, a while.
01:16:08.000 I first moved to the back of my manager's garden.
01:16:14.000 She had like a granny flat.
01:16:15.000 Not with her anymore.
01:16:16.000 So there was no toilet in there.
01:16:19.000 There was no TV. No toilet?
01:16:22.000 No toilet.
01:16:23.000 Where'd you go to the toilet?
01:16:24.000 So what she would do, so she worked out of her house, which was also her office.
01:16:28.000 She would leave the back door open, but she would lock the bathroom from the inside.
01:16:34.000 So at nighttime, I could go, open the back door, go use the bathroom, but I couldn't enter the house because it had been locked from the inside.
01:16:42.000 I had no phone and no car.
01:16:45.000 Whoa.
01:16:45.000 So the first 18 months in LA was just a fucking joke.
01:16:48.000 You're just trapped.
01:16:49.000 Yeah, and she would come and knock on my door and go, hey, you have an audition at 11.15?
01:16:52.000 And it'd be like 10. And I'd go, okay, someone give me a ride?
01:16:55.000 She'd go, no.
01:16:56.000 I'd go, okay, we're going to have to cancel that audition because I don't have a car and I can't get to Santa Monica.
01:17:01.000 And that went on for a while and then eventually...
01:17:04.000 Eventually she was like, maybe buy a car and get a phone.
01:17:07.000 I was like, yeah, okay, I'll do that.
01:17:08.000 And then it started to kind of shift around a little bit.
01:17:11.000 So when you came over, you were just known as an actor?
01:17:14.000 Yeah, I had done a couple of TV shows in England, a little bit of theatre in England, started to do some English films, and was doing a TV show in France for England when I got the role on Lord of the Rings.
01:17:31.000 When I did Lord of the Rings...
01:17:33.000 And as we're coming towards the end of Principal Photography, which is almost two years, the on-set publicist, there's a lady called Claire Raskind, I think she's married now, so she has a different name, she said to me, what are you going to do after this?
01:17:47.000 What are you going to do when we wrap in December?
01:17:49.000 I was like, I don't know, go back to Manchester, wait for it to come out a year later.
01:17:54.000 And she said, if I was you, I'd go to LA, get a jump on this.
01:17:58.000 Like, go take some meetings, get a manager, get an agent.
01:18:02.000 I was like, okay, cool.
01:18:04.000 Good advice.
01:18:05.000 Went back to Manchester for a little bit.
01:18:07.000 Manchester's an amazing city.
01:18:10.000 If LA is London, Manchester is New York.
01:18:13.000 It's industrial.
01:18:14.000 It's a bit rough.
01:18:16.000 There's been a bunch of times.
01:18:17.000 I like it there.
01:18:18.000 Big football town.
01:18:20.000 Fun place to do stand-up.
01:18:21.000 Yeah, they're raucous and they drink and they like to fight.
01:18:24.000 A lot of fights.
01:18:25.000 I saw a lot of fights there.
01:18:26.000 You've got to have your shit together, you know.
01:18:29.000 So...
01:18:30.000 So, went back to Manchester, was bored.
01:18:32.000 I mean, Manchester has a lot of great elements to it.
01:18:34.000 There's not a huge amount of work for an actor there.
01:18:37.000 You can do some soap operas like Coronation Street or something shit.
01:18:40.000 What's Coronation Street?
01:18:42.000 Coronation Street is the longest running soap opera in England.
01:18:45.000 I think it's been running for 40 years.
01:18:48.000 Whoa.
01:18:49.000 Yeah.
01:18:50.000 Is there any original cast members that are still on the show?
01:18:52.000 There's a guy called Bill Roach who was in the first ever episode and he's been in it for ages.
01:18:57.000 It's called Ken Barlow in the show.
01:18:59.000 And it's a very boring, very pedestrian slice of Northern life.
01:19:04.000 And the way that they combat that in England is to have a show called EastEnders, which is about London life.
01:19:11.000 And EastEnders is like drugs and crack and fighting and markets and, you know, everyone gets their hands dirty.
01:19:18.000 Like Snatch.
01:19:19.000 Yeah, like Snatch.
01:19:21.000 Like surrealised Snatch.
01:19:22.000 And then Coronation Street is about, you know, have you seen me budgie?
01:19:26.000 I've lost me budgie!
01:19:28.000 Or...
01:19:28.000 What's a budgie?
01:19:29.000 Like a budgery guy, like a canary.
01:19:31.000 Or, you know, the cat's got up the tree and can't get the cat down and then they call the fire brigade and the fire brigade turn up and one of the people who's in the fire brigade happens to be the ex-lover of the person who's got the cat and they get together and they go have a pint together and it's very...
01:19:43.000 Just like a low hum.
01:19:45.000 It's very northern, but it's a little, I think, derogatory towards London people because it paints them to be two-dimensional, you know, they all wear flat caps and...
01:19:54.000 Oh, I love football, me, and a bit simple, and I don't really know what I'm talking about.
01:19:58.000 Oh, that newspaper, a bit scary.
01:20:00.000 All that news, you know.
01:20:02.000 So I was always a little offended by Coronation Street.
01:20:05.000 But that was the option when you're in Manchester, if you're an actor, be in Coronation Street.
01:20:09.000 It wasn't really my vibe.
01:20:10.000 Wow.
01:20:10.000 So I came to L.A. and still am really good friends with Elijah Wood.
01:20:16.000 So I hung out with Elijah for probably a month or so, just hanging out, go to Disneyland, go to Magic Mountain, doing our thing, men's Chinese theatre.
01:20:23.000 Huge deal for me.
01:20:24.000 Huge.
01:20:24.000 Like, when I was growing up, the whole put your hands in the Clark Gable hand thing or see how small Betty Grable's feet were, that's a huge deal for me.
01:20:32.000 That's old school Hollywood.
01:20:33.000 So I did all that.
01:20:34.000 And then moved to my manager's place and, you know, just kind of got fucked up for a year.
01:20:42.000 And then got my shit together and started going to the gym and started feeling a little bit better about stuff and had a couple of auditions that I got close on and then ended up getting an audition for Lost.
01:20:51.000 And then, you know, kind of...
01:20:52.000 That's all she wrote.
01:20:54.000 Yeah, I think you kind of have to...
01:20:55.000 The thing about the enormity of Rings was, like, it was such a big job to do.
01:21:01.000 And coming down the other side of it...
01:21:04.000 You have to have a little bit of time to kind of take a breath.
01:21:09.000 And I think that was different for a lot of other people.
01:21:10.000 You know, Viggo went off and rode horses for a year.
01:21:14.000 And, you know, Orlando started working very quickly.
01:21:16.000 He went out and rode horses, like no acting, just rode horses for a year?
01:21:20.000 I think for the first year after Lord of the Rings, he was very much into just being on his own, riding horses.
01:21:25.000 He's like one of those Daniel Day-Lewis characters, isn't he?
01:21:28.000 Totally.
01:21:28.000 He was so good in the apocalypse movie.
01:21:32.000 What is that movie called?
01:21:33.000 The Road?
01:21:34.000 I couldn't even watch it.
01:21:35.000 I got to the point where he's teaching his son how to shoot himself in the mouth.
01:21:38.000 I was like, we're good.
01:21:39.000 Yeah, I take it.
01:21:40.000 Have you seen Eastern Promises where he plays the Russian guy with tattoos all over him?
01:21:43.000 Fantastic.
01:21:43.000 Has the naked fight in the steam room.
01:21:45.000 He's ballsy.
01:21:46.000 He's a very ballsy actor.
01:21:47.000 He's a great guy.
01:21:48.000 Did you guys live in New Zealand when you were doing that?
01:21:50.000 Yeah, two years.
01:21:50.000 For two years?
01:21:51.000 Yeah, well, like just under two years.
01:21:53.000 What is that like?
01:21:55.000 New Zealand?
01:21:56.000 I, you know, I was dumb enough to assume that New Zealand would have the weather that Australia has because it's close to it on the map, but it's actually not close to it geographically.
01:22:03.000 It's a long way away and certainly much more southern geographically than Australia.
01:22:07.000 So it kind of has English weather, sunny days, but generally, you know, showers and wind.
01:22:12.000 They call it windy Wellington because, you know, every year some old woman will get blown down on the street and, you know, it'll be a huge issue.
01:22:18.000 It's a very safe country in terms of going out and doing your thing.
01:22:22.000 They have a great respect for art.
01:22:24.000 You know, everyone's inked.
01:22:26.000 Everyone's covered in ink.
01:22:28.000 I've never seen so many tattoos on young people in my life, which they call mokus over there.
01:22:31.000 More of a tribal thing, but certainly it's a rites of passage when you reach 18 or 20 or 21. You'll get a tattoo.
01:22:38.000 They love art.
01:22:39.000 Everyone's a painter.
01:22:40.000 Everyone's a sculptor.
01:22:41.000 Big surfing community.
01:22:42.000 Girls are cute.
01:22:45.000 They like to drink like English people, which...
01:22:48.000 Didn't necessarily do me any favors.
01:22:50.000 The countryside is so beautiful.
01:22:52.000 So beautiful.
01:22:52.000 That's why they filmed it there, right?
01:22:54.000 Yeah.
01:22:54.000 Well, Peter Jackson's also a Kiwi.
01:22:56.000 So he's from there.
01:22:57.000 He's from there.
01:22:58.000 So he wants to keep all of his movies on the island of New Zealand, on the islands of New Zealand, because it brings a lot of industry in there.
01:23:05.000 I don't think he would have done it if he knew it was outside of his wheelhouse, but there's nowhere else to make God, the fucking scenery is so spectacular.
01:23:14.000 The Shire exists.
01:23:16.000 You can go to the Shire.
01:23:17.000 Green, rolling hills, sheep everywhere, cows, beautiful, you know.
01:23:20.000 Yeah, it's a strange place, New Zealand, because it's covered with all these animals, too.
01:23:24.000 It's like so many wild animals that were brought in there.
01:23:27.000 Like, apparently there was no mammals there, like in the 1600s or whatever the fuck it was, where people started arriving.
01:23:32.000 Yeah, and they have a huge issue with that.
01:23:34.000 They have a huge issue with, you know, animals being brought in, so they're very strict in customs.
01:23:39.000 Also, you know, millions of years ago, you had birds flying over New Zealand going, wow, that place looks rad.
01:23:44.000 Like, there's trees everywhere and there's no humans.
01:23:45.000 I'm going to land, which they did.
01:23:47.000 And then over the course of a few more million years, they then lost the ability to fly because they didn't need it because they're natural predators.
01:23:53.000 So you have all these flightless birds walking around doing their thing, then they accidentally bring in things like possums and rats and stuff and cats.
01:24:01.000 And these animals can't believe their luck.
01:24:02.000 They're like, there's all these flightless birds, they can't even climb a tree.
01:24:04.000 What are these birds?
01:24:06.000 Kakapoos, kias, kiwis.
01:24:08.000 They're all flightless.
01:24:10.000 I mean, the Kakapo is a parrot, one of the largest parrots in the world.
01:24:13.000 The male will build a little depression in a U-shaped valley, so he'll have an amplifier, which will be a U-shaped valley.
01:24:21.000 In that U-shaped valley, he'll build a depression, and he'll sit in that depression and make a deep, guttural, bass-like noise for his female to hear him.
01:24:30.000 And the female will walk over, but it takes place over the course of a few days.
01:24:34.000 And any animal can hear that.
01:24:37.000 So the rats and the cats and the possums would just follow the sound and the male won't move.
01:24:42.000 It'll just sit there.
01:24:43.000 And they just kill them.
01:24:43.000 They just kill them and eat them.
01:24:44.000 So they're now being protected in certain parts of New Zealand.
01:24:48.000 Oh my God.
01:24:49.000 Because these poor little animals have been, you know, fucked over by other ones.
01:24:52.000 Well, Australia's had similar issues.
01:24:54.000 And one of the things that Australia's had an issue with was the proliferation of rabbits.
01:24:59.000 Right.
01:24:59.000 Because rabbits had gotten to Australia and they just bred like a motherfucker and spread across the entire country and along the way they had to figure out how to mitigate the issue of these rabbits and the overpopulation so they brought in foxes and then the foxes got out of control and then they brought in feral cats.
01:25:17.000 So feral cats and foxes are like one of the biggest issues in all of Australia.
01:25:21.000 They just have an overwhelming amount of them and they still haven't put a dent in the rabbit population.
01:25:27.000 No.
01:25:28.000 I mean, any time human beings try and get involved with the nature of things, they make a huge mess out of it.
01:25:35.000 I mean, there's a classic story in Hawaii where I can't remember what the animal was.
01:25:39.000 I used to know...
01:25:41.000 But they brought in an animal to bring down the populations of another animal, but that animal is diurnal and the other animal is nocturnal, so they never fucking meet each other.
01:25:50.000 They just smell each other.
01:25:51.000 They're like, I know he's around here somewhere, but he's in his burrow, you know.
01:25:55.000 That's hilarious.
01:25:56.000 It's scary.
01:25:56.000 I mean, you know, I think humans, well, I don't think, humans are easily my least favorite animal on the planet.
01:26:04.000 I don't have a huge amount of hope for them as a species.
01:26:07.000 I'm pretty ashamed to represent...
01:26:09.000 Oh, kidding me?
01:26:11.000 We're done, dude.
01:26:12.000 But you're nice.
01:26:13.000 I'm nice.
01:26:14.000 We're humans.
01:26:15.000 When we're talking about the individual, that's fine.
01:26:16.000 But potential.
01:26:17.000 I mean, as a species, you know, we are a mess and we're breeding out of control.
01:26:25.000 And for some reason, we place a huge amount of importance on human life because our brains are developed to the point where we think that we're...
01:26:33.000 Special, but if you were to take humans off this planet and have a look at it in 200 years, it would be a vibrantly green, blue planet living in balance with itself.
01:26:44.000 Right, but you wouldn't want to live there.
01:26:47.000 You wouldn't be able to talk to anybody.
01:26:48.000 There'd be no restaurants.
01:26:49.000 No movies would ever get made.
01:26:51.000 You would have never worked.
01:26:52.000 I would have never worked.
01:26:54.000 There'd be no computers.
01:26:55.000 No planes.
01:26:56.000 Couldn't get anywhere.
01:26:57.000 You'd garden.
01:26:58.000 You'd get eaten.
01:26:59.000 You'd eaten within an hour.
01:27:00.000 True.
01:27:00.000 They'd find you and they'd fucking cut you down.
01:27:02.000 But you live in balance with that world.
01:27:06.000 If you were to take worms or ants or spiders or beetles off the planet, we would be dead.
01:27:12.000 In a hundred years.
01:27:13.000 You know, I'm lucky enough to do this show and every so often we find ourselves in the real wilderness where you've taken a car to a river and a river to a boat and then walked to someone else and then taken another boat for three hours down river and you're heading to this forest jungle-like location and I'll see humans on the river's edge fishing or playing.
01:27:35.000 Kids, little six-, seven-, eight-year-old kids, and I think...
01:27:39.000 Those fuckers know so much that we'll never know.
01:27:42.000 They know when the rains come in.
01:27:43.000 They know when the predator's nearby.
01:27:45.000 They have incredible night vision.
01:27:46.000 They have hearing that we can only imagine.
01:27:48.000 They have the ability to climb a tree like we can or heal themself with a fruit or with a plant.
01:27:54.000 I admire that much more than whoever the fuck Kanye does or anyone.
01:28:00.000 Not just Kanye, I'm not picking on Kanye, but LeBron's incredible.
01:28:03.000 He's an incredible athlete.
01:28:05.000 I have a lot of respect for him and Steph Curry is an amazing basketball player.
01:28:09.000 They can't contend with the ability that these children have, these indigo children.
01:28:13.000 Right, but much like your agent told you back in the day, they live different lives.
01:28:18.000 You can't compare LeBron to them, and if you put Kobe Bryant on that island, he would probably starve to death.
01:28:27.000 But if you put them on the court with him, they wouldn't score a single point.
01:28:30.000 It's like we're all in these different paths.
01:28:33.000 Yes, horses for courses, but my retort to that would be, You know, the correct way to live on this planet would be the way that they're doing it, not the way Kobe's doing it.
01:28:43.000 Who knows how Kobe lives his life?
01:28:44.000 He is an extraordinary athlete.
01:28:46.000 But in terms of excess, and I'm part of this, in terms of the excess of, let's say, Los Angeles, the waste, the portion size, the pollution, the traffic, We're not getting it right.
01:28:57.000 We've got it wrong.
01:28:58.000 We don't seem inclined necessarily to fix it in the Western world because we're like, well, yeah, but we can all eat.
01:29:06.000 We live in warm houses.
01:29:07.000 We get DirecTV.
01:29:08.000 Like, I'm just chilling.
01:29:09.000 Like, until it really hits the fan and the tsunami comes in, we're good.
01:29:13.000 The other people, those Africans, they've kind of fucked it up.
01:29:16.000 And the people in Southeast Asia, they've fucked it up.
01:29:18.000 South America's a mess.
01:29:19.000 But in LA, you're like sitting pretty.
01:29:21.000 We did it.
01:29:22.000 We succeeded.
01:29:23.000 We've not succeeded.
01:29:24.000 We're not living in balance with our planet.
01:29:26.000 We are killing our planet.
01:29:27.000 It is on its way.
01:29:28.000 And it might not happen in our lifetime.
01:29:30.000 And I know certain people have said this for generations.
01:29:32.000 You have all these scientists saying, it might not happen in my lifetime, but it will certainly happen in the next.
01:29:36.000 And I'm part of that person, those people representing that comment as well.
01:29:40.000 But I do believe that we're at that tipping point of like, what are we doing?
01:29:46.000 Why are we here?
01:29:46.000 Like, we're not here to make cash.
01:29:48.000 We can't be.
01:29:48.000 Because I mean...
01:29:50.000 It's about moving from being a human species that made some mistakes and realised the limitations of our planet to living as a human species that has the potential to go forward into our future.
01:30:04.000 At the moment, there is no future for human beings.
01:30:06.000 It's a ticking clock.
01:30:08.000 We need to take that clock out of the scenario to be a successful species because ants did it, bees did it, worms did it.
01:30:16.000 Ents, which are my favorite animal, by the way, live in extremely condensed societies.
01:30:21.000 There's no murder.
01:30:22.000 There's no rape.
01:30:23.000 They look after their kids.
01:30:24.000 They make their forest healthier.
01:30:26.000 They leave no carbon footprint.
01:30:27.000 They make the planet better.
01:30:29.000 They can't talk.
01:30:30.000 They don't make movies.
01:30:31.000 Their music is bullshit.
01:30:32.000 They may make music.
01:30:33.000 Have a conversation with them.
01:30:34.000 You want to beat your head up against a rock.
01:30:36.000 If you wanted to fuck one, there'd be something wrong with you.
01:30:39.000 People are way better than ants.
01:30:40.000 I think that what we're doing is definitely tragic, if you look at the consequences that human society has on the environment itself.
01:30:47.000 But if you look at the potential that human minds and human creativity and ingenuity have, and you look at what we've been able to accomplish with Raw materials and what we've been able to build in this incredible world.
01:31:00.000 Just the ability to do this kind of a show where you're broadcasting something.
01:31:03.000 Right now it's flying through the air into people's phones.
01:31:06.000 There's people in their car that are listening to this in real time.
01:31:11.000 I just think that what we need to do is put some of that ingenuity on figuring out how to be more renewable and figure out a way to be more sustainable.
01:31:20.000 But I don't think that's outside of the realm of possibility by any stretch of the imagination.
01:31:24.000 I just think it's hard because people live in the moment and they don't feel the consequences of their actions until they're too late.
01:31:32.000 And I think that's an issue, that people have to recognize the consequences Globally of the human race and what this thirst for innovation and expansion and overpopulation, what is the impact on it?
01:31:45.000 But there's been a lot of talk and a lot of thought and a lot of planning and preparing for an eventual world where we don't have waste.
01:31:56.000 I think even the concept of waste is just about not thinking things all the way through.
01:32:02.000 And that a lot of what is waste is really just an alternate source of energy that needs to figure out how to be used.
01:32:10.000 Or we need to figure out how to use it.
01:32:12.000 I'm a huge fan of people.
01:32:14.000 They're my favorite animal, unlike you.
01:32:15.000 No way.
01:32:15.000 Least favorite animal on the planet.
01:32:17.000 Well, you're allowed to have your opinion and I have mine.
01:32:20.000 I'm on team people.
01:32:21.000 You're totally entitled to that opinion.
01:32:22.000 People are all my favorite people.
01:32:24.000 Yes.
01:32:25.000 You know, there are some very, very smart minds out there, and obviously the most impressive thing...
01:32:30.000 Would you rather hang out with them or a panda?
01:32:32.000 I would rather hang out with a panda.
01:32:34.000 Are you kidding me?
01:32:34.000 Really?
01:32:34.000 The hottest chick in the world who's super smart.
01:32:36.000 Would you rather hang out with her or a squirrel?
01:32:38.000 I mean, I've hung out with hot chicks before.
01:32:40.000 I feel like I've got...
01:32:41.000 You've got it down, but you don't know the squirrel.
01:32:43.000 You really need to get to know that squirrel.
01:32:45.000 Feed him a nut and figure out what is it?
01:32:47.000 Do you shit?
01:32:47.000 Do you eat nuts?
01:32:48.000 What else?
01:32:49.000 Do you ponder the universe?
01:32:50.000 Do you realize that we're alone in infinity?
01:32:52.000 There is a mystery about those animals that I don't feel the mystery as much with human beings.
01:32:57.000 Really?
01:32:58.000 Yeah, and I don't.
01:32:58.000 And, you know, there have been some incredibly profound leaps in technology with some very, very smart people on this planet and we are doing the best that we can do.
01:33:07.000 I would argue that all of those technological breakthroughs and all of those concepts that we have and all of those ways that we can talk about being impressive as a species...
01:33:17.000 Because we can't avoid it, comes from a very human angle.
01:33:21.000 We're looking at it in a human conundrum because we're in our brain.
01:33:24.000 We're saying, well, that's fine, you know, humans can be dicks, but think about what we've done.
01:33:29.000 We went to the fucking moon and, you know, we know what the dark side of Mars looks like and we put robots on Mars and we can create music that was made in an orchestra based on scratches in a record groove.
01:33:40.000 Like, that shit...
01:33:41.000 It's insane.
01:33:42.000 It doesn't matter.
01:33:44.000 None of that stuff matters.
01:33:45.000 It's not why we're here.
01:33:46.000 And it doesn't do anything for the larger concept of this universe and this planet.
01:33:54.000 It does something for us as a species, selfishly.
01:33:57.000 We're amazing.
01:33:58.000 Look what we did.
01:33:58.000 We created this thing and, you know, we went to the moon.
01:34:02.000 Ants don't care that you went to the moon.
01:34:04.000 Well, the universe doesn't care if ants exist.
01:34:06.000 The universe doesn't have any feeling for this planet.
01:34:10.000 This planet will disappear.
01:34:11.000 This star will eventually run out of gas and burn out and supernova.
01:34:16.000 And all the planets in orbit will be unsustainable for any kind of life that we understand.
01:34:20.000 And the universe won't give a fuck.
01:34:22.000 You know why?
01:34:22.000 Because it's infinite.
01:34:23.000 And somewhere out there, there's a billion fucking Earths and a billion solar systems that are absolutely exactly the same as ours.
01:34:32.000 Sure.
01:34:32.000 And it doesn't care.
01:34:33.000 So it doesn't matter whether you're an ant or a person.
01:34:35.000 But to say that it doesn't matter that someone put those grooves after spending all this time talking about how great Monty Python are...
01:34:42.000 That's for me, though.
01:34:43.000 Me personally.
01:34:43.000 But it's not just for you.
01:34:44.000 It's for all the people that experience that.
01:34:46.000 And what humans can do that these animals can't do is spread these experiences, this art.
01:34:52.000 Whether it's Louis C.K.'s stand-up or Sarah Silverman's stand-up or Monty Python's jokes or Janis Joplin's music.
01:34:58.000 You can't say that that's nothing, because what that has done is elevate the emotions of every single human being that's experienced that.
01:35:05.000 And you could say that human beings aren't important, but then in that case, nothing is important.
01:35:10.000 Life is not important.
01:35:11.000 The ocean's not important.
01:35:12.000 It's not really.
01:35:13.000 And the greater spectrum of the universe, this infinite thing that we exist in, none of that is statistically important.
01:35:21.000 But to us, for an entity that's experiencing that, you're way more important to me than a squirrel.
01:35:28.000 I'll just tell you right now.
01:35:29.000 Thank you, Joe.
01:35:29.000 Way more.
01:35:30.000 Thank you.
01:35:30.000 If I had an ant on me, and if I crushed that ant, if I could get a giggle out of you, I'd smash that ant with my fingers.
01:35:35.000 Oh, you wouldn't get a giggle out of me.
01:35:36.000 I'd be sad.
01:35:37.000 I'd be smashing.
01:35:37.000 I would cry for the universe.
01:35:38.000 You would cry for an ant?
01:35:40.000 Well, I wouldn't necessarily cry, but if you had an ant on you, and you were like, I'm going to crush this, how do you feel about it?
01:35:45.000 I would go into a long dash.
01:35:47.000 But you ate chicken.
01:35:48.000 You were eating chicken here.
01:35:49.000 Yes, I was eating chicken.
01:35:50.000 Yes.
01:35:51.000 It happens.
01:35:51.000 It does happen.
01:35:52.000 It doesn't happen.
01:35:54.000 You have to kill them.
01:35:55.000 That's true.
01:35:57.000 I go out of my way to try and live in balance and be nice to the universe as best as I can because it makes me feel better.
01:36:06.000 It makes me feel like my life is in more balance if I do that.
01:36:10.000 I'm actually working in flow with the universe better.
01:36:14.000 And I agree.
01:36:15.000 I don't necessarily think that the universe has a bias one way or the other.
01:36:18.000 If we were to play around with the idea of the universe sitting down with a pad and a piece of paper and they drew a line down it and they went ants on one side, humans on the other side, and they weighed up the pros and cons, ants win every time.
01:36:31.000 They win every time, Joe.
01:36:32.000 What do you mean by the pros and cons to who?
01:36:35.000 To ants?
01:36:36.000 No, the universe is having a conversation with Jimi Hendrix and Jimi Hendrix says, okay, you tell me...
01:36:43.000 Which is the most impressive animal to you if you were to compare humans with ants?
01:36:48.000 I believe that the universe will say there's no contest.
01:36:51.000 These animals live in complete balance with the planet that they're on.
01:36:55.000 They do all the right things.
01:36:56.000 They take care of their kids.
01:36:58.000 They don't fuck with other animals unless they need to.
01:37:00.000 They eat the right amount of food.
01:37:02.000 They create almost no waste.
01:37:03.000 Meanwhile, you've got this bloated...
01:37:06.000 Over-intelligent ape that is running around going, we invented the world, we can do whatever we want with it.
01:37:12.000 We're abusive.
01:37:13.000 What's the planet that we live on?
01:37:15.000 Do you think the universe would slap us around a little bit?
01:37:17.000 I don't know.
01:37:17.000 I mean, ultimately, I don't know if the universe is an entity that really contemplates these issues.
01:37:22.000 I mean, if you really were examining the life of human beings in comparison to the life of everything else on this planet, you would have to assume, first of all, that there's just so much inspiring potential for creativity that comes out of this one weird monkey that makes mouth noises and expresses itself through facial expressions and written language.
01:37:45.000 This is a very, very bizarre And I would say, if I was completely objective and had no connection whatsoever to human beings, I would say that fucking thing is way more impressive than ants.
01:37:58.000 That thing is flying through the air in metal tubes on a daily basis all across the world.
01:38:04.000 That thing is sending video through the sky into a fucking phone that slips into its pockets.
01:38:10.000 That thing is driving on this hard surface that it's laid out all over the world.
01:38:16.000 These internal combustion engines are powering these metal boxes.
01:38:20.000 They pulled the metal out of the ground and forged it into the form of metal boxes.
01:38:24.000 Then they've covered these wheels with rubber.
01:38:27.000 And a fucking explosion, a controlled explosion inside this iron, cast iron block is forcing this car around.
01:38:36.000 They stop in these places where they pull out this fuel that they've taken, fossil fuel from around the fucking world, and tankers and pipelines, and they've processed it into this gasoline that they can then pump into this car.
01:38:51.000 They pay for it with a credit card.
01:38:53.000 Money is numbers that are on a computer somewhere.
01:38:57.000 They have paper that represents this money.
01:38:59.000 No one understands.
01:38:59.000 It's a fucking insanely complex world.
01:39:02.000 Very, very.
01:39:02.000 Insanely complex.
01:39:03.000 If you're looking at the universe, if the universe is looking at life on Earth in terms of what's more impressive, Jesus fucking Christ, there's nothing more impressive than people.
01:39:15.000 I disagree.
01:39:16.000 And also that fuel, by the way, is killing the planet and the universe, potentially.
01:39:23.000 My concept of the universe is probably...
01:39:24.000 The universe?
01:39:25.000 Yeah.
01:39:26.000 How's the gas killing the universe?
01:39:26.000 Well, it's having to cough up some of that shit that is being created on Earth, right?
01:39:30.000 Cough up?
01:39:30.000 It's like, oh, don't get too close to that.
01:39:32.000 You know, I mean it's not good for us and Eventually, but I think if you look at it in perspective of like how long human beings have been here Yeah, we've met a mess of things like really quickly but also the amount of innovation that has occurred in our lifetimes in the industrialized world's lifetime over the course of you know X amount of hundreds of years It's fucking staggering.
01:39:54.000 Yeah, it's no wonder they haven't caught up to what they're doing and And figured out how to mitigate all the issues that they've created by making internal combustion engines and airplanes.
01:40:03.000 Which creates pollution.
01:40:04.000 Well, airplanes create so much pollution, and that's the real global warming, is fucking airplanes.
01:40:09.000 The world actually changes the temperature of the Earth.
01:40:13.000 When September 11th rolled around, they stopped flying over the United States.
01:40:17.000 It altered the temperature of the Earth in a significant, statistically measurable way.
01:40:22.000 I mean, cows farting causes a huge amount of problems for greenhouse gases.
01:40:26.000 But in my mind, as an atheist, my idea of the universe is probably a little closer to our little statue that we have here, something living in complete balance with the universe, which I think the universe would respect a little bit more in an ant than they would in a human.
01:40:41.000 But if you're talking about something impressive, which all those things are impressive, that certainly comes from a human bias.
01:40:46.000 How do we equate things that impress us?
01:40:48.000 Oh, the fact that we can drive cars, that is impressive for humans.
01:40:51.000 Elephants watch us go by and they don't think that's impressive.
01:40:54.000 A jaguar, let's say, can hunt completely silently in the dark, make not one noise and catch the creature that it's looking for with complete and utter economy.
01:41:07.000 And sit down, eat that creature, and then sleep for two or three days.
01:41:10.000 That, for me, is more impressive than Hawking's mind or than some theory that Einstein came up with.
01:41:16.000 They're living in balance and flow with their universe, and they're doing it in such a way that this creature right here that is also about balance and flow goes, you're fucking radical.
01:41:25.000 Well, I don't know if Buddha says you're fucking radical to a jaguar, but I think jaguars are obviously incredibly impressive and spectacular, and I'm not arguing against jaguars, but someone with a night vision goggle can leave some food out for that stupid jaguar and shoot it in the head and turn it into a jockstrap,
01:41:41.000 if they wanted to.
01:41:42.000 Living out of flow with their planet.
01:41:44.000 Well, what's in flow with this poor little antelope getting killed by this jaguar?
01:41:48.000 Well, so you decide.
01:41:51.000 So you decide.
01:41:52.000 You decide that some gal in a jaguar thong isn't hot.
01:41:56.000 You know, she's sitting out there on her porch with her headphones on so she doesn't blow her ear off while she shoots that 300 wind mag at a jaguar who's going after a piece of meat.
01:42:05.000 It bums me out so hard when you see these beautiful women on Twitter that are posing with dead lions and dead rhinos and dead elephants.
01:42:10.000 It's just like, what are you doing?
01:42:12.000 This is a very weird thing.
01:42:13.000 It's a very weird thing that people want to fly over and shoot like giraffes and all these different things, but then when you get into the conservation aspect of it, it gets very cloudy.
01:42:25.000 It's not as simple as You know, people are doing cruel things and killing these animals, then posing them and taking pictures.
01:42:32.000 The amount of money that's generated by these people doing that is substantially more than any other conservation effort that's out there.
01:42:39.000 It gets real weird.
01:42:40.000 Because, like, this rhino thing, I had the guy on, Corey Knowlton, that killed that black rhino.
01:42:45.000 And, you know, I wanted to find out, like, why did he do it?
01:42:48.000 Where's his head at?
01:42:49.000 You know, what...
01:42:50.000 First of all, that rhino fed, you know, who knows how many villagers.
01:42:54.000 I mean, they had all the images of them cutting up that rhino and feeding all those villagers.
01:42:58.000 That rhino was also, they needed to kill that rhino because the population is very small of the rhinos, and that rhino was killing other male rhinos.
01:43:05.000 It was a non-breeding older male, and it was very aggressive.
01:43:09.000 It killed females, killed males, and in order to keep the population healthy, they had to eliminate that rhino.
01:43:13.000 They were trying to figure out how to do it.
01:43:14.000 And this guy paying all that money to fly over there and kill that rhino is actually better Counter-intuitively better for the overall population of those rhinos.
01:43:24.000 Also, the $350,000 pays for rangers.
01:43:28.000 It stops poaching.
01:43:29.000 You know, one of the interesting things they're doing now to stop poaching is they've come out with 3D printing of rhino horns.
01:43:35.000 They're going to make artificial rhino horns and flood the market in Asia.
01:43:40.000 Apparently, these are virtually indistinguishable from wild rhino horns.
01:43:44.000 They actually share rhino DNA, they make them a keratin, and they're going to 3D print these rhino horns and just flood the market in Asia.
01:43:52.000 I mean, it is brilliant, but it's crazy that they need to do this.
01:43:56.000 I mean, poaching is way more of an issue for rhino death and any of these exotic animals than hunting is.
01:44:04.000 A lot of places that we go, they discolor the horn, which doesn't cause any grief to the rhino itself.
01:44:10.000 They'll color the horn orange or red or yellow so that it loses the value for the Medicinal market.
01:44:17.000 Like you said, it's made of keratin, which is the same material that makes up fingernails.
01:44:20.000 Fingernails and hairs.
01:44:21.000 So just bite your fingernails.
01:44:22.000 If you think you're going to cure cancer, bite your fingernails.
01:44:24.000 Well, you're speaking logically about things that are just totally based in superstitious.
01:44:28.000 I mean, get Viagra, you fuck.
01:44:29.000 You don't have to eat a rhino horn to get your dick hard.
01:44:31.000 This is nonsense.
01:44:33.000 It doesn't work, either.
01:44:33.000 That doesn't work.
01:44:35.000 I mean, it's crazy that these things are going extinct because it would be one thing if you ate rhino horns and it really did make your dick hard as a rock and you could fuck all night for days, but it doesn't.
01:44:45.000 It doesn't even work, but yet people are still killing them for that very reason.
01:44:50.000 And I've had this conversation with people a lot where I say, let's say, like you were just saying, let's say for the sake of argument, it does work.
01:44:56.000 Let's say it does work.
01:44:57.000 That does not give us the right to kill that animal to the point of extinction.
01:45:01.000 Well, it doesn't make any sense because there's other things that it does.
01:45:04.000 It's one thing that if rhino horns made people super geniuses and cured cancer, then you'd be like, okay, we have to figure out a way to breed more rhinos.
01:45:14.000 We don't want to make rhinos go extinct because they're essentially the fountain of wisdom.
01:45:20.000 If you kill them off, then you lose this one opportunity to figure out how this one animal developed this property that so greatly aids us.
01:45:28.000 It would be pretty ironic if rhino horns made people the ultimate human being, but yet we're killing them off to try to become the ultimate human being and robbing ourselves of this one source.
01:45:38.000 But again, that's a very, very strong human angle.
01:45:43.000 The rhino, all the animals that exist on our planet are Fair game to be explored and had a look at to see how they benefit us, but how about how they benefit the world?
01:45:53.000 The majesty of an elephant's tusk is based on the fact that it's attached to an elephant, not the fact that you can cut it off and put it on your mantelpiece.
01:46:02.000 It loses all value then.
01:46:04.000 We look at things from this human angle as opposed to this planetary universe type angle, Well, some of us do.
01:46:11.000 But, I mean, again, with the rhino thing, the conservationists that are trying to protect the rhinos, they all agree that you have to kill the aggressive, non-breeding older males in order to keep the population healthy.
01:46:21.000 Yes.
01:46:22.000 So, like, this guy going over there and killing this rhino, the whole thing's very cloudy because it's very counterintuitive.
01:46:28.000 Right, right.
01:46:28.000 Have you seen Louis Thoreau's documentary on African safaris?
01:46:32.000 Yeah.
01:46:33.000 Fascinating.
01:46:34.000 Yeah, he's amazing.
01:46:34.000 Because all of these animals that he, when he went to those South African hunting camps, all those animals were on the verge of extinction just 20 years ago.
01:46:42.000 Now they're flourishing.
01:46:43.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:46:43.000 But they're flourishing in these camps where you can hunt them.
01:46:46.000 Right.
01:46:47.000 Canned hunting, right?
01:46:47.000 It's so weird.
01:46:49.000 That's a lot.
01:46:49.000 There's a lot of places that he's not allowed to go.
01:46:51.000 Because of that?
01:46:52.000 Because of a few things that Louie's done.
01:46:55.000 He's obviously quite a controversial documentarian.
01:46:58.000 He shouldn't be.
01:46:58.000 He's amazing.
01:47:00.000 He's fantastic.
01:47:01.000 Nothing controversial about what he does, in my opinion.
01:47:03.000 He's just honest and thorough and brilliant.
01:47:06.000 I think what he did with that hunting camp, it really exposed how bizarre that whole world is.
01:47:13.000 Isn't his show called The Bizarre World or something like that?
01:47:15.000 Louis C.K.'s Bizarre Adventures or Bizarre World?
01:47:18.000 It's not Louis C.K. It's Louis Theroux.
01:47:19.000 Louis Theroux.
01:47:20.000 I forget what it's called, what the name of it is.
01:47:22.000 I don't think he can go to South Africa at the moment because of upsetting some people in South Africa about something, you know?
01:47:30.000 Was it because of that or a different thing?
01:47:32.000 Maybe.
01:47:33.000 I think he's superb, Louis Theroux.
01:47:34.000 Well, I know Scientology is doing a documentary on him.
01:47:39.000 Oh, wow.
01:47:40.000 Yeah, because he's doing a documentary on them, so they decided to do a documentary on him.
01:47:44.000 I know which one I'd rather watch.
01:47:46.000 Yeah.
01:47:46.000 Well, I want to watch both of them, actually.
01:47:48.000 Well, yeah.
01:47:49.000 What kind of crazy shit they have to say about him.
01:47:52.000 What nutty thing have they concocted?
01:47:55.000 They do free, I think it's free brunch or free lunch on a Saturday near where I live.
01:48:02.000 And you see people going in there for, you know, from 11. Personality tests?
01:48:06.000 11.30 to 1 o'clock and people come up and be like, Are you enjoying the chicken?
01:48:10.000 Yeah.
01:48:10.000 You want to come into this little tiny room with me and answer a few questions?
01:48:13.000 Like, fuck that.
01:48:14.000 Wouldn't that be crazy?
01:48:15.000 I hope all the homeless people go in and just get free food off them, but shit like that gives me the willies.
01:48:20.000 I mean, organized religion in general gives me the willies.
01:48:22.000 Well, they're one of the most bizarre ones because they were founded by the most prolific science fiction author the world has ever known.
01:48:29.000 You know, the idea that, well, he lied and made up a bunch of shit except this.
01:48:34.000 This is all true.
01:48:35.000 Well, there's statements where he said, my next mission was to try and come up with a religion, and that's what I set out to do, and he did it.
01:48:41.000 Oh, yeah.
01:48:41.000 I mean, not just statement.
01:48:42.000 His ex-wife spoke in great detail about his plans in order to create some sort of religion and really profit off of it.
01:48:50.000 I mean, he spent a good deal of his life living in a boat hiding from the IRS. You know, because before they were tax-exempt or tax-free, you know, status, before they had that status, they were, you know, he owed money because they were a cult and they were taking money from their members and the whole thing's fucking madness.
01:49:10.000 Yeah, it is.
01:49:10.000 It's crazy.
01:49:11.000 But the Louis Theroux thing, for anybody who has a hard-line stance on this whole African hunting thing, just take a look at that.
01:49:21.000 It's probably not going to change your opinion, but it'll give you an idea of the complexities and the weirdness involved in this whole thing.
01:49:29.000 These animals literally were on the verge of extinction.
01:49:32.000 You've seen the documentary.
01:49:33.000 The old guy at the end when Louie's like badgering him and he goes, you don't understand.
01:49:39.000 Africa is fucked.
01:49:41.000 It's fucked.
01:49:42.000 The only way these fucking animals are going to survive is if you've got to give them value.
01:49:46.000 You've got to make them wear something.
01:49:47.000 That's bizarre.
01:49:48.000 Yeah, give them a monetary value to protect them, yeah.
01:49:51.000 It's very strange.
01:49:52.000 Your show is Wild Things.
01:49:55.000 Wild Things with Dominic Monaghan.
01:49:57.000 What do you do on this show?
01:49:58.000 This is a BBC show?
01:49:59.000 It was at BBC America for a while.
01:50:01.000 It's now Travel Channel.
01:50:02.000 I go around the world, try to change people's ideas about animals that most people are scared of and try and evoke a little bit of curiosity and kill fear in whatever...
01:50:14.000 Whatever scares you, whether you're scared of travel or weird food you've never eaten or animals or people of different colour or people of different...
01:50:25.000 You know, ideas about life.
01:50:27.000 I get a lot out of travel and I love animals.
01:50:31.000 So what happened with me was whenever I had like two or three weeks off, I would always take a trip on my own unless I was hanging out with my girl.
01:50:42.000 And the trip on my own would usually be pick an animal around the world.
01:50:47.000 Go and find that animal.
01:50:48.000 But to make the two or three weeks spread out a little bit, instead of going directly to the source, I would land in the capital city and spend two or three days in the capital city going to restaurants, hanging out in human communities and just asking them, like, hey, where would I go and see a whale shark?
01:51:04.000 Do you guys know about a whale shark?
01:51:05.000 Have you seen it around here?
01:51:06.000 Where would I go?
01:51:06.000 How would I take transport?
01:51:08.000 Do I take a train?
01:51:08.000 All that kind of stuff.
01:51:09.000 And then gradually make my way down there and for the last week try and do that thing.
01:51:13.000 So...
01:51:13.000 My agents knew about this, and they were constantly seeing photos of my adventures and stuff.
01:51:18.000 And my non-acting agent kind of said to me, you know, this is a show, Dom.
01:51:24.000 Like, this is a show, what you do.
01:51:26.000 No one does that thing that you do.
01:51:28.000 Like, you should meet some producers.
01:51:29.000 So I was like, all right, I'll meet some producers.
01:51:31.000 So I sat down with different people, ended up sitting down with a guy from Canada, runs a production company called Cream.
01:51:39.000 And he said, what's the show?
01:51:40.000 And I pitched him a trip that I took to find orangutans, a trip that I took to find the whale shark, a trip that I took to find the king cobra.
01:51:47.000 And he was like, cool, do you have eight ideas?
01:51:49.000 And I was like, I have 808 ideas.
01:51:51.000 And he went, all right, come up with eight ideas and we'll come back in two weeks time and write the show and came down.
01:51:57.000 First episode's about ants because it's my favorite animal.
01:52:01.000 And we went to Ecuador to find the army ant.
01:52:03.000 My plan was to lie down in a carpet of army ants, in what they call a drove of army ants, and know what it feels like to have this, you know, 20 million ants walking around on top of you, and will they go into your ears and your eyes and your mouth and your nostrils,
01:52:19.000 and can they kill a grown human being and all that kind of stuff?
01:52:21.000 They can, and do.
01:52:21.000 They can, but you'd have to be tethered.
01:52:23.000 You'd have to be tethered.
01:52:24.000 As an able-bodied human being, no, you just run away.
01:52:27.000 Well, it depends on the type of ant, right?
01:52:29.000 Not really.
01:52:29.000 Bullet ants can kill you.
01:52:31.000 They can't?
01:52:32.000 You get a bunch of them?
01:52:33.000 I'm the authority on ants.
01:52:34.000 If a bunch of them climb on top of you, you wouldn't get killed?
01:52:37.000 Well, are you talking about a hundred of them?
01:52:40.000 It's very difficult.
01:52:42.000 Bullet ants are extremely toxic, right?
01:52:44.000 Bullet ants have the highest pain threshold of any insect sting in the world.
01:52:49.000 It's right at number six.
01:52:50.000 Number one is called a sweat bee, which is the equivalent of tasting white wine vinegar.
01:52:56.000 The bullet ant is described as walking on hot coals with a nail in your foot.
01:53:00.000 So it's extremely painful.
01:53:02.000 Bullet ants live in relatively small communities for ants, maybe 20, 40 bullet ants in a huge group.
01:53:08.000 If you were to piss off a community of bullet ants, the most amount that would be on you would probably be, let's say for the sake of argument, 50, which is outside the realms of possibility, but let's say 50. 50 wouldn't kill you.
01:53:20.000 So it's painful, but it's not like...
01:53:23.000 It's debilitatingly painful.
01:53:25.000 You would probably...
01:53:27.000 Want to go to hospital to have them give you morphine so that you could get over the next three days.
01:53:31.000 But it's not like 50 rattlesnake bites.
01:53:33.000 It's not going to kill you.
01:53:35.000 So we did the ant episode in Ecuador.
01:53:39.000 They ended up not allowing me to lie down in a carpet of ants because they said it was too dangerous, but I ended up putting my naked hand down.
01:53:45.000 It was too dangerous.
01:53:46.000 How so?
01:53:47.000 Well, they just said, yeah, how are we going to get them all off you?
01:53:49.000 How are we going to get home with the rest of the day?
01:53:51.000 You're going to have 300,000 ants on you.
01:53:53.000 We're never going to be able to get...
01:53:55.000 The stings out of you for you to be on TV. My friend Brian Callen, he stayed in Bolivia for a while.
01:54:01.000 He was going to be some sort of a bug scientist, whatever the fuck you would call that.
01:54:08.000 Entomologist.
01:54:09.000 Entomologist.
01:54:10.000 And he was studying for it and was staying in these, they had these huts where they were elevated off the floor of the jungle and they would put turpentine on the posts of the huts To keep the ants from crawling up into your...
01:54:24.000 Because once they find you, once they decide that you're a target, you're fucked.
01:54:27.000 Yeah.
01:54:28.000 Especially if you can't move.
01:54:30.000 Like I said, if you had two broken legs, you're in trouble with bullet ants.
01:54:33.000 The great thing about bullet ants, and you'll see this in these communities, In the local indigenous communities, when the ants move through that village, they'll just go off for a day.
01:54:41.000 They just leave.
01:54:42.000 They'll let the ants clear out all the scorpions, all the spiders, all the centipedes, all the bullshit, spring clean my house for me, on you go.
01:54:49.000 Wow, that's interesting.
01:54:50.000 So that's a balance, yeah.
01:54:52.000 It's a beautiful thing.
01:54:53.000 That is pretty fascinating.
01:54:54.000 So I'm kind of interested in the concept of fear.
01:54:57.000 You know, just as a rule, I think that word is divisive and negative, potentially, and doesn't do us any favor, doesn't move us forward as an animal.
01:55:08.000 And I kind of reject it as a concept.
01:55:10.000 I think things are dangerous, but the idea of fear makes you clumsy, makes you make the wrong decisions, makes you do things incorrectly.
01:55:16.000 So some of the more archetypal fears on the planet are Heights and snakes and spiders and planes.
01:55:23.000 And we try to show people those things in a slightly more positive light so that you can sit comfortably at home and start to change the way your brain chemistry works with those animals.
01:55:35.000 I mean, obviously, you know that, like, let's say for the sake of argument, you are scared of spiders.
01:55:41.000 If you hear the word spider, spider will take you to 10 negative things that happened in your life associated with spiders in a circle that you can't get out of.
01:55:47.000 And it's feeding that negativity.
01:55:49.000 But if you now put a positive story in there where you saw a spider with a friend that you were in love with and then you went off and had food that you really liked, you're starting to change that pathway.
01:55:58.000 And if you just replace the negative with the positive, you'll then feel differently about spiders.
01:56:03.000 And that's what I'm attempting to do with the show.
01:56:05.000 So your motivation is not to celebrate these animals, it's rather to mitigate fear?
01:56:09.000 Well, it's a bit of both.
01:56:10.000 I mean, obviously we show the animals in the light that I like to show them, which is positive, beautiful...
01:56:17.000 Fascinating.
01:56:19.000 Profoundly...
01:56:19.000 Yeah, fascinating.
01:56:21.000 What's the word I was looking for?
01:56:25.000 Where they're able to...
01:56:26.000 I'll find the word in a second, but I feel like certain animals are able to actually...
01:56:39.000 We're good to go.
01:56:56.000 So then you or I have to then juggle that idea of a wild animal saying, I'm not into this, I'm going to get away.
01:57:02.000 And me trying to impose on them, if you hang out for a little bit, I'm not going to hurt you, I'm not going to do anything.
01:57:08.000 Just give me two minutes of your time.
01:57:10.000 I can achieve what I want to achieve.
01:57:12.000 You can be on your way.
01:57:13.000 And you can see that palpably with...
01:57:17.000 A change in the animal's body language.
01:57:19.000 I can see when a spider's okay with it.
01:57:21.000 I can see when a scorpion's okay with it.
01:57:23.000 A snake, any animal that I'm with, I'm like, oh, it's okay now.
01:57:26.000 You can come closer.
01:57:27.000 You can sit down.
01:57:28.000 You can chill.
01:57:28.000 Because this animal gets it now.
01:57:29.000 But at first, a wild animal's like, I'm wild.
01:57:32.000 I'm going to kill you.
01:57:32.000 What are you saying?
01:57:33.000 Like, a wild animal gets it when they see you?
01:57:36.000 Yeah, they work out the...
01:57:37.000 They pick up on...
01:57:38.000 It's energy, right?
01:57:39.000 They pick up on the change in that energy.
01:57:42.000 Let's say we just did an episode in Sri Lanka with the Indian cobra, monocled cobra, one of the most iconic cobras, if not snakes in the world, with those two little glasses on the back of its hood.
01:57:53.000 The one that the snake charmers work with.
01:57:55.000 So I pull like a six-foot Indian cobra out of a stack of wood at the back of someone's house.
01:58:02.000 And the first thing that cobra wants to do is get away.
01:58:04.000 So I'm holding on to it by its tail and it's trying to get away and it's trying to get away and it's trying to get away.
01:58:07.000 And it intellectualizes in its snaky brain, oh, I can't get away.
01:58:11.000 Why can't I get away?
01:58:12.000 So it turns around and looks at my hand.
01:58:13.000 Oh, the reason why I can't get away is this guy's hand.
01:58:15.000 So now I'm going to deal with his hand.
01:58:17.000 So it tries to bite me, tries to bite me, tries to bite me.
01:58:19.000 Can't bite me because I know how to hold on to a snake and let it bite me.
01:58:24.000 If I ride out that storm, which usually takes about two to three minutes, the snake, again, in its snaky brain, thinks, this isn't working.
01:58:32.000 All the normal ways that this works for me, an animal's got hold of me, I try and bite it, let's go, I'm free.
01:58:37.000 That's not working.
01:58:38.000 And now I'm getting exhausted because I'm biting and not getting anything for it.
01:58:41.000 Maybe I'll just relax.
01:58:42.000 As soon as that animal relaxes, I then chill.
01:58:45.000 I then release a little bit of tension on its tail, move a little closer, sit down with it.
01:58:50.000 Again, in its snaky brain, it's like, oh, I'm being fed something positive now.
01:58:54.000 There's no tension on my tail.
01:58:56.000 I can move a little freer.
01:58:57.000 And there's an exchange of energy where the snake now thinks, all right, I'm not going to be aggressive because that's not working for me or this animal that's in front of me.
01:59:05.000 We chill for a little bit, talk about how beautiful it is, talk about all the amazing things about it, and then I let it go.
01:59:10.000 And the snake won't remember that.
01:59:11.000 The snake's not going to then see a human a few days later and go, positive experience, this is cool, because their brain doesn't work like that.
01:59:17.000 It doesn't benefit a snake to have those memories to hang on to because they don't generally run into humans.
01:59:23.000 But I'll remember it.
01:59:24.000 And maybe the audience will remember it.
01:59:25.000 Maybe they'll feel differently about that animal now.
01:59:27.000 So this show really kind of came about in sort of an organic manner.
01:59:32.000 Like this is something that you were doing anyway for no reason other than because you enjoy being around these animals and you have the freedom to travel and see things that intrigue you.
01:59:42.000 Right.
01:59:42.000 That's pretty fucking cool.
01:59:44.000 Yeah.
01:59:45.000 You know, I'm obsessed.
01:59:46.000 It could have been a show about a few different things.
01:59:48.000 I'm obsessed by I love Manchester United.
01:59:52.000 This could have very easily been a show about me going around the world watching major soccer rivalries around the world and eating street food and meeting people and every so often seeing animals.
02:00:01.000 I could have done that.
02:00:01.000 It could have been about street food.
02:00:03.000 I love street food.
02:00:04.000 We could have done a whole episode about street food with a little bit of football and a little bit of animals.
02:00:07.000 It just so happens that...
02:00:09.000 You know, if you create a TV show, the backdrop of animals, it's an evergreen show, right?
02:00:14.000 I mean, people want to watch shows about animals in 10 years' time.
02:00:18.000 They're still going to want to watch an episode about Vietnam.
02:00:21.000 Those animals are still going to exist.
02:00:23.000 And they're still going to be like, oh, I'll watch this.
02:00:25.000 It's 10 years old.
02:00:26.000 But he's still doing all the universal things that we're doing.
02:00:29.000 He's interested in the world.
02:00:30.000 He's interested in Vietnam.
02:00:31.000 He goes to see the capital city.
02:00:33.000 He hangs out with animals.
02:00:34.000 So it was an easier sell to build it around animals.
02:00:40.000 I mean, you know, I'm getting paid to go on holiday, really.
02:00:42.000 That sounds amazing.
02:00:43.000 It's cool, man.
02:00:44.000 It's really cool.
02:00:44.000 You love animals.
02:00:46.000 You obviously have this deep affection for them, but yet you eat them.
02:00:50.000 I do eat some.
02:00:51.000 I've been vegetarian for the most part this year, and every so often I'll eat a piece of fish.
02:00:56.000 And when I was in South Africa, I felt kind of weak with needing protein, so I ate a steak.
02:01:02.000 I ate this big hunk of chicken today because I felt like I was kind of low on energy.
02:01:09.000 I didn't want to come in here and be like, hey, what's happening?
02:01:12.000 So I ate something to give me a little bit of fuel.
02:01:14.000 But I would say, I don't know, I probably eat meat once every two or three months, something like that.
02:01:22.000 I'm not the biggest dude in the world, so for me to feel full on vegetables and fruit is fine for the most part, but every so often my system is like, I need flesh.
02:01:36.000 And today I was like, I need flesh.
02:01:38.000 But you like animals as much, if not more, than you like people.
02:01:42.000 Undoubtedly.
02:01:42.000 But imagine if you talk to someone and they say, well, I only kill people like once every couple weeks.
02:01:47.000 Every couple weeks I feel like I need to murder.
02:01:50.000 Yeah.
02:01:50.000 No, I hear you.
02:01:51.000 That's a valid point.
02:01:52.000 And I am working on it.
02:01:54.000 I made a New Year's resolution at the end of last year where I said to my family, like, I think I'm going to go vegetarian.
02:02:01.000 And they all laughed at me because they were like, you eat meat and fish and you like duck and you eat goose and all this kind of stuff.
02:02:07.000 And I was like, I think I'll be okay.
02:02:10.000 And I've struggled a little bit at times this year with not eating meat.
02:02:15.000 Because I need the energy.
02:02:16.000 And the show that I do is very sapping of your energy.
02:02:19.000 You're in very hot countries.
02:02:20.000 We're up at sunrise.
02:02:22.000 We finish at sunset, chasing after animals, putting myself in harm's way with dangerous animals.
02:02:26.000 And just every so often, I'm like, I feel it.
02:02:29.000 I feel like I need some flesh.
02:02:31.000 Well, vegetarians would call bullshit on that.
02:02:33.000 They'll say, like, that's ridiculous.
02:02:34.000 You're just not doing a good job of monitoring the amount of protein that your diet takes in.
02:02:40.000 Quinoa, hemp seeds, whatever you need.
02:02:43.000 Tofu.
02:02:44.000 Yeah.
02:02:45.000 I mean, I believe as animals...
02:02:46.000 Tofu's tricky because it's processed.
02:02:48.000 Right.
02:02:48.000 You know, when you're dealing with tofu, you're dealing with very much a human-created thing.
02:02:52.000 Right.
02:02:53.000 I mean, I believe as animals, we're omnivores, right?
02:02:55.000 We're grazers of certain things.
02:02:57.000 So, I think there's times where your body might need a little bit of it.
02:03:02.000 But I'm open to the idea of someone saying, I can organize you a diet that has no meat and you can maintain your weight.
02:03:09.000 We were talking about this before we started the show.
02:03:10.000 Like, I usually coast around about 150 and...
02:03:14.000 If I drop five pounds, I look like I'm suffering from some disease.
02:03:20.000 Well, you have very unique dietary requirements, it seems like, because your metabolism seems bananas.
02:03:24.000 And your history of doing this from the time you were a child.
02:03:28.000 You know what the warrior diet is?
02:03:29.000 You ever heard of that?
02:03:30.000 Yeah.
02:03:30.000 It's the idea that you have one huge meal a day because that's how, you know, people ate a long time ago.
02:03:36.000 They would try to find food, they would get it, and then they would feast at night.
02:03:40.000 Right.
02:03:41.000 And so there's a lot of people that believe that that's a really good way to manage your weight, to not eat anything at all during the day and then you eat at night.
02:03:48.000 Right.
02:03:48.000 I tried it for a little while just to see...
02:03:50.000 I didn't try it because I was serious about it.
02:03:52.000 Just like, is that even something that makes sense?
02:03:54.000 And you can get used to it.
02:03:56.000 You can get used to not eating all day, but I don't think you have the same amount of energy you have.
02:04:00.000 Right.
02:04:01.000 But that was the other thing they used to say, that breakfast is the most important meal.
02:04:05.000 They've totally abandoned that.
02:04:07.000 What is the most important meal?
02:04:08.000 There's no...
02:04:08.000 They're just meals.
02:04:09.000 There's no most important meal.
02:04:11.000 Okay.
02:04:12.000 The idea was that if you don't have a healthy breakfast, you won't feel good throughout the day.
02:04:17.000 Right.
02:04:17.000 I often times don't have breakfast.
02:04:19.000 I often times do what I call earning my breakfast, where I don't eat until I work out.
02:04:25.000 It's also because I like to put my body in situations where it has to work hard, where it doesn't want to.
02:04:31.000 If I don't have food in my body, it's harder to push as much energy out.
02:04:37.000 It's harder to have the amount of...
02:04:39.000 But then you have to focus more, and then you have to force yourself into it.
02:04:43.000 You know, so I put myself in weird situations like that just to make my body function.
02:04:47.000 Right, you like that battle a little bit.
02:04:49.000 I like that battle too.
02:04:50.000 I think it's why every year or so I stop myself from having certain things.
02:04:54.000 My New Year's resolution is usually stop that.
02:04:56.000 Never start that.
02:04:57.000 It's like, you can't have added sugar, you can't have added salt, you can't have bread, you can't have alcohol, you can't have meat this year, although I've been cheating.
02:05:05.000 But, I mean, you obviously don't suffer from the same thing that I suffer from.
02:05:10.000 Putting on muscle, you know, like I'll go to the gym and train as hard as I can for, you know, the size that I'm at.
02:05:18.000 And then, you know, I don't get as big as I would like unless I'm pounding food.
02:05:25.000 And that's just, it's pretty stressful on my system, you know.
02:05:29.000 Yeah, it sounds you have a very unique situation when it comes to that.
02:05:32.000 But, you know, you could have eggs, and eggs, if you get them free range from healthy chickens, there's no negative impact.
02:05:38.000 They make an egg every day.
02:05:40.000 I have 22 chickens at home, so I eat a lot of eggs.
02:05:44.000 And my chickens are like my pets.
02:05:46.000 So, like, I'm having food that's created by pets, you know?
02:05:50.000 I feed them healthy food, and the eggs are dark orange, and they're filled with choline and all sorts of healthy protein, and they're really good for you.
02:05:59.000 You can get around killing an animal to eat them, but...
02:06:05.000 The thing about being a vegetarian or being a vegan is animals don't play by that rule themselves.
02:06:10.000 They're constantly killing each other.
02:06:12.000 Like you were talking about the jaguar killing the antelope and that that's natural.
02:06:17.000 Well, the reason why human beings are here is 100% because of hunting.
02:06:21.000 If we weren't, if we'd never figured out hunting, we'd never figured out killing, how to eat animals, we probably, our brain size would've never doubled over a period of two million years.
02:06:31.000 We'd never figured out agriculture, we would've never figured out civilizations, and we wouldn't, just wouldn't be in this position to debate veganism if it wasn't for hunting in the first place.
02:06:40.000 It's one of the more ironic things.
02:06:42.000 We are omnivores.
02:06:44.000 We do eat meat and we always have eaten meat.
02:06:46.000 It's a beautiful moral choice to try to leave the smallest carbon footprint, to try to leave the smallest footprint as far as animal suffering.
02:06:55.000 But the reality is the wild itself is...
02:06:59.000 Fucking vicious.
02:07:00.000 Oh, it's brutal.
02:07:01.000 They don't give a fuck about each other.
02:07:03.000 No, it is brutal.
02:07:04.000 It's fascinating that we are so hell-bent on saving animals that don't save each other.
02:07:10.000 Sure.
02:07:11.000 I mean, you know, I'm lucky enough to go into the jungle a lot and a lot of people that I talk to is like, oh man, you go into the jungle, that must be incredible.
02:07:18.000 It's so blossoming with life and all these new things and eggs and You know, creatures everywhere.
02:07:24.000 And I'm like, well, there is an element of that to the jungle.
02:07:27.000 But ultimately, the jungle is a place of death.
02:07:29.000 It's a place of dark, swollen, water-sodden death.
02:07:34.000 Well, it's a cycle, right?
02:07:35.000 It's a constant, continuing, reviving cycle.
02:07:41.000 It's like things are eating things which are eating things which are getting eaten by things.
02:07:46.000 And it's just constant swirling.
02:07:48.000 And one of my favorite documentaries is a documentary on the Harpy Eagle.
02:07:52.000 And it's these harpy eagles.
02:07:54.000 Oh, they're fantastic.
02:07:55.000 These fucking flying dinosaurs that are swooping sloths and monkeys off of these trees.
02:08:00.000 It's just an amazing, amazing documentary.
02:08:03.000 And just the idea that different things in different parts of the world have evolved to find their niche.
02:08:11.000 They've evolved to find the way that they survive the best.
02:08:15.000 And this giant, crazy, flying raptor that just swoops in.
02:08:20.000 I believe it's the biggest eagle in the world.
02:08:21.000 Yeah.
02:08:22.000 I think the harpy is, yeah.
02:08:23.000 They swoop down and just snatch monkeys out of trees and kill them and eat them.
02:08:28.000 What a bizarre niche.
02:08:30.000 What a bizarre specialty.
02:08:32.000 Think what those monkey communities think about that ego.
02:08:35.000 They must get their kids together and they're like, right?
02:08:37.000 There is a monster that lives in the sky, and this thing will end you.
02:08:41.000 So if you see something like a big shadow that comes towards you, that is the dragon.
02:08:44.000 That is the monster.
02:08:45.000 Get away from it.
02:08:46.000 We don't have that as much in our world.
02:08:48.000 I mean, we watch Game of Thrones, so we think that certain dragons exist and stuff.
02:08:52.000 But in other animal communities, like the insect world, insects are my favorite animal, that is fucking brutal, gladiatorial daily life for these creatures.
02:09:01.000 It's really fucking heavy.
02:09:04.000 Yeah, the life of the wild is very heavy.
02:09:07.000 It's very strange.
02:09:09.000 I was moose hunting in British Columbia this last fall, and when we were up there, we came across a calf that had been recently killed by wolves.
02:09:18.000 I took some pictures of it and put it on my Instagram feed, because it was just stripped down to the bone, but it was bizarre.
02:09:27.000 If you have never seen something like that before, it's like being there, like, well, this just happened.
02:09:33.000 Like, this happened hours ago.
02:09:35.000 Like, there was blood, and there was hair everywhere, and most of the meat had been eaten.
02:09:40.000 And we're like, this is the real world that these things live in.
02:09:44.000 This is its baby.
02:09:45.000 The moose that we're out there hunting, some of its babies got captured by a pack of wolves, and they tore it apart.
02:09:52.000 And we're, I mean, it's...
02:09:55.000 It's contradictory that you would find something appalling and beautiful at the same time, but it is both.
02:10:01.000 It's both of those things.
02:10:02.000 For sure, for sure.
02:10:03.000 Because we're so conditioned by streets and phones and electricity and houses and buildings that when you're exposed to this totally different lifestyle, this totally different environment, like the wild, the actual real wild,
02:10:19.000 it's like this jolt of, oh yeah, this jolt of, wow, there's like...
02:10:25.000 This is a completely different variable.
02:10:29.000 A series of variables that you're dealing with here.
02:10:32.000 So simplistically beautiful.
02:10:33.000 I was in Kenya probably eight or nine years ago and I saw a zebra foal.
02:10:41.000 Zebra foal.
02:10:43.000 That was being hounded by two hyenas.
02:10:47.000 The mum had gone.
02:10:47.000 You saw it live?
02:10:49.000 Yeah, I saw it.
02:10:49.000 It was trying to navigate its way around a big tree while these hyenas were just fucking with it.
02:10:56.000 And they had broken, or it had broken, one of its back legs.
02:10:59.000 Compound fracture, like this.
02:11:01.000 So it was hopping around.
02:11:03.000 On three legs, and there was two hyenas.
02:11:06.000 So it would go to the left, hyena, go to the right, hyena.
02:11:08.000 And the hyenas, which knew at some point they were going to chow down on this thing, were really just fucking with it.
02:11:14.000 It would come over, they would bat it, it would fall over, it would get up again, they'd chase it, they'd hit its other leg, they'd try and bite the broken leg off.
02:11:21.000 They were, like, fucking with it.
02:11:23.000 They weren't trying to eat it for a good half an hour or so.
02:11:25.000 And I was in mixed company.
02:11:27.000 I was taking a lot of pictures of this thing, thinking, this is fucked up.
02:11:30.000 This is how unfair the last few moments of this creature's life is going to be.
02:11:34.000 The car that I was in, the people were like, okay, can we go now?
02:11:37.000 Like, I don't want to see that.
02:11:38.000 And we left, and I was talking that night with the people that I was with, and they were like, oh, it's so disgusting that we see this.
02:11:46.000 And I was like, this is what's real.
02:11:48.000 This is nature.
02:11:50.000 This is life, you know?
02:11:51.000 A few weeks ago, me and my friends...
02:11:55.000 In the middle of the night, we went walking around Griffith Park, and we saw an owl, and we saw some coyotes running along the track and stuff.
02:12:02.000 And then we went home, and I have a few snakes at home, and I started passing around snakes for people.
02:12:07.000 Hey, check this one out, check this one out.
02:12:08.000 I got my scorpion out, tarantula.
02:12:10.000 One of my friends was like, oh, this is a normal Saturday night.
02:12:13.000 We're sat here with all Dom's creatures and stuff.
02:12:15.000 And I stopped her, and I was like, Fleur, this is actually normal.
02:12:19.000 The shit that we were doing earlier on, where we're all showing each other photos on our iPhone and watching TV and Putting a DVD on and playing FIFA on our PlayStation.
02:12:27.000 That's a construct that's been created to make us feel okay about life and keep us stupid so that the bosses can do what they want.
02:12:34.000 This is real.
02:12:35.000 We're supposed to know the name of every snake.
02:12:37.000 We're supposed to know the name of every tree in the forest.
02:12:39.000 We've lost that ability and that's what I'm trying to get back to.
02:12:43.000 Is it normal?
02:12:44.000 I mean, I think that Playstations are about as normal as beehives.
02:12:48.000 It's something that people create.
02:12:50.000 People create things and they create things.
02:12:53.000 Construction, buildings, cars, they create things all over the world.
02:12:57.000 I think all behavior is natural.
02:12:59.000 I really do.
02:13:00.000 And I think even the most bizarre fucked up human behavior is natural.
02:13:03.000 We are.
02:13:03.000 Because we're natural.
02:13:04.000 Well, yeah, of course we're natural.
02:13:06.000 We're part of the animal kingdom.
02:13:07.000 We are, as a creature, a natural creator.
02:13:10.000 The natural thing created by bees would be a wild hive and honey.
02:13:16.000 The natural thing created by humans would be a child.
02:13:19.000 A painting is a slightly abstract version of creation.
02:13:22.000 It's still a creation, but it's much more abstract than a wild beehive and a baby.
02:13:27.000 So there's nothing natural about buildings, but yet human beings naturally construct them without any interaction with each other all over the world.
02:13:35.000 Yeah, maybe like a shelter to keep the rain off you is natural, but like That's where it starts, and then they figure out solar power, and then they figure out electricity, and then they figure out Wi-Fi, and then they figure out...
02:13:46.000 It seems natural to me.
02:13:48.000 It doesn't seem like it should be because it's not wild, because independent of human beings, it doesn't exist.
02:13:54.000 But independent of bees, beehives don't exist.
02:13:57.000 I think as bizarre as our antics and our creations are, I think ultimately everything that happens is natural.
02:14:05.000 Yes, I would agree with that.
02:14:07.000 The difference being that we can debate whether or not we should be doing it, or whether or not the consequences are worth the effort.
02:14:12.000 The intoxifying of the oceans, the skies, the pollution, the picture that I showed you of Mexico City, how fucked up the pollution is in Mexico.
02:14:20.000 There are creatures out there that debate.
02:14:22.000 Yeah.
02:14:23.000 There are.
02:14:24.000 We're not tuned into that vibration.
02:14:26.000 There are creatures that...
02:14:28.000 As far as we're concerned, when we watch them, silently communicate with each other.
02:14:33.000 But it's not silent for them.
02:14:34.000 There is something, whether it's audible or something that they sense or something that they understand, that they do.
02:14:39.000 We're just not in tune with that idea, you know?
02:14:42.000 And these things that we create naturally, let's say for the sake of argument, a skyscraper or a jumbo jet or something like that.
02:14:49.000 Yes, I agree.
02:14:50.000 That is natural because we exist and we created it.
02:14:53.000 That's a natural process.
02:14:55.000 But those things that we're now creating are...
02:14:59.000 Large, expanded, huge versions of what is natural.
02:15:02.000 The Trade Center isn't a natural building.
02:15:04.000 A natural building might house ten people.
02:15:07.000 I don't know how many people worked in the Trade Center.
02:15:10.000 Thousands, right?
02:15:11.000 Two and a half thousand, three thousand people.
02:15:13.000 That, to me, feels slightly unnatural.
02:15:15.000 A jumbo jet that can take 500 people from one place to the other feels a little unnatural.
02:15:21.000 Maybe a plane that can take eight people feels a little bit more unnatural.
02:15:24.000 Natural to me, do you know what I mean?
02:15:26.000 I don't know.
02:15:27.000 We've swollen, everything's bad.
02:15:29.000 Yeah, but that's natural.
02:15:30.000 That's what people do.
02:15:30.000 I mean, there's a reason why Mexico City exists at the same time that Los Angeles exists, at the same time that New York City exists, is because if you leave people alone, you don't kill them off, you don't kill them off with disease or war, they overpopulate and they develop these nationally intrusive cities.
02:15:44.000 Yes, it's natural for us.
02:15:46.000 It's natural for us as a species to look around and go, yes, Delhi is completely swollen with people, but that's the natural journey that the country of India is going to go on and create this city.
02:15:58.000 I don't necessarily think, if you take out this human bias, that that is natural for our species to do that.
02:16:04.000 We're not supposed to breed rampantly out of control.
02:16:07.000 We're supposed to take care of...
02:16:09.000 The air and the planet and the food and do that in balance and naturally with our species.
02:16:14.000 Well, the reason why human beings are overpopulating is because we figured out how to get the fuck away from predators.
02:16:20.000 And the reason why we wanted to fuck and make as many people as possible is because naturally we got eaten.
02:16:25.000 I mean, the jaguar that kills the antelope also kills people.
02:16:29.000 True.
02:16:29.000 That was a big part of the problem.
02:16:32.000 It absolutely was.
02:16:32.000 Living in a jungle in a grass hut, it's really hard to fight those fuckers off.
02:16:35.000 It absolutely was.
02:16:36.000 It's the reason why we left the forest.
02:16:37.000 We're not in that scenario anymore.
02:16:39.000 So we're developing this new style of living and we have to figure out a way to deal with the consequences of all this waste that we produce.
02:16:48.000 And also deal with the fact that people have this very bizarre diffusion of responsibility thing going on.
02:16:54.000 When there's a thousand people that are doing something and that something is fucking everything up, it feels different than if one person is doing something and that something is fucking things up.
02:17:01.000 Then you feel responsible.
02:17:03.000 But if you're a part of a city that's polluting the world, it doesn't seem like it's your fault.
02:17:08.000 Somebody else out there has got to be fixing it.
02:17:10.000 Yeah, and also the very, I mean, I think apathy is one of the most dangerous words on the planet, the very apathetic idea of, well, what difference can I make?
02:17:19.000 It's a plastic bottle.
02:17:20.000 I mean, just forget about it.
02:17:21.000 You're like, well, obviously, if everyone thought that way, it would be a major issue.
02:17:24.000 Well, I have a lot of friends who smoke, unfortunately, because I know a lot of comedians.
02:17:28.000 Cigarettes?
02:17:29.000 Yeah, and I see them throw them on the ground all the time.
02:17:31.000 They throw them on the ground, step on them.
02:17:33.000 Two of my friends the other day did it, and I don't want to just be that guy who corrects people every time that happens, so I just avoid it.
02:17:40.000 But fuck, it's so depressing.
02:17:42.000 The fact that people are just so comfortable with throwing a cigarette on the ground, stepping on it, and then it's out of their mind.
02:17:48.000 Yeah, I'm going to step away from the mic for a second.
02:17:50.000 That's trash.
02:17:51.000 Yeah, it's trash.
02:17:52.000 Like, that's what I want to say when that happens.
02:17:53.000 Yeah, it is trash.
02:17:54.000 There's a complete disconnect.
02:17:55.000 And I think it comes, and this is another, you know, poor comment on cigarette smokers.
02:18:02.000 I think it comes from the fact that they smoke.
02:18:04.000 They smoke, they smoke, they get to the end of it, and they're like, fuck, that's a dirty habit.
02:18:08.000 It's fucking disgusting.
02:18:09.000 And they throw it down.
02:18:11.000 They're done with it, so it's not their problem anymore.
02:18:13.000 It's also they're abusing their own body, so they don't mind abusing the environment.
02:18:17.000 Right.
02:18:17.000 And also, you see it a lot of times, people driving on roads or freeways, and the idea behind that is, I know this is bad for me, I know it's dirty, I don't want to stub it out and leave it in my car.
02:18:27.000 I'm just going to throw it into the planet.
02:18:29.000 Dude, I've seen eight different Priuses throw cigarettes out the window.
02:18:33.000 It's one of my favorite things.
02:18:35.000 I'm trying to keep a running tab of Priuses throwing cigarettes out the window.
02:18:39.000 Don't you think it looks bizarre now when people smoke cigarettes?
02:18:43.000 I was born in 76 until the probably early 2000s.
02:18:49.000 Seeing people smoking cigarettes didn't really matter to me.
02:18:52.000 I'd been so exposed to it that I didn't even have a comment about it.
02:18:55.000 I was just like, oh, there it is.
02:18:56.000 Now when I see someone pull out a box, pull out a cigarette, put it in their mouth and light it, I watch them like, what are you doing?
02:19:02.000 What's going on?
02:19:03.000 Do you not know what's happening with this thing that you're just about to inhale into your body?
02:19:08.000 This is going to slowly poison you, but the thrill of it or the fun of it or the James Dean thing where they just want to be cool...
02:19:14.000 Yeah, the danger of it.
02:19:15.000 I mean, I grew up thinking about all that stuff.
02:19:17.000 It looks cool for, you know, James Dean to smoke it, and the Beatles grew up smoking, and in the Second World War, they gave them out as part of your rations.
02:19:25.000 So you can understand how soldiers came back being addicted to cigarettes because they're scared of death, they're around death, they're bored out of their mind.
02:19:31.000 They get ten cigarettes a week, they're all going to smoke cigarettes.
02:19:34.000 But, I mean, you know, the level of education, certainly, in most of Western Europe and in this country, is to such an extent that when I see a smoker, I'm just like, Yeah, well, it's just one of those weird contradictions.
02:19:47.000 Self-abuse.
02:19:47.000 I know very intelligent people who smoke, too, which is very shocking.
02:19:51.000 Like, when you know someone and they're brilliant and then they can't stop smoking cigarettes, you're like, wow, if you could figure out a way to balance this whole thing out better, you'd be so much healthier.
02:20:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:20:02.000 But they don't...
02:20:03.000 Self-abuse, you know?
02:20:05.000 The self-abuse thing is an interesting thing, but, I mean, everyone's on their own journey, so you've just kind of got to let them...
02:20:10.000 I guess.
02:20:10.000 And I think everyone has a vice.
02:20:12.000 But sometimes if you say that to someone, just let them know how you feel about it, it'll maybe shift their perspective.
02:20:17.000 And they'll have this newfound way of like, oh, yeah, Dom's right.
02:20:21.000 You know?
02:20:22.000 It is fucking weird.
02:20:23.000 Like, I just do it.
02:20:24.000 I don't think about doing it.
02:20:25.000 Yeah.
02:20:26.000 I was a lot more fucking, you know, Opinionated, not that I don't have strong opinions now, but I kind of keep them a little bit more to myself.
02:20:35.000 In my 20s, I thought that it was just a human thing to be able to kind of spit venom at people when you felt like doing it.
02:20:43.000 And now I've grown up a little bit, I don't do it as much.
02:20:46.000 Unless I was dating someone who I was in love with and they were smoking, which I would never do.
02:20:50.000 I found that really unattractive.
02:20:52.000 Then I feel like I'm in a position, or my family, but like a friend, I just feel like they'd be like, well, fuck you, Don.
02:20:59.000 You drink tequila, go fuck yourself.
02:21:01.000 Who are you?
02:21:01.000 You're not God.
02:21:03.000 It's true, but you don't drink tequila all day every day, and the thing about those cigarette smokers is, man, they wake up in the morning, it's a cup of coffee and a cigarette, they light that fucker, and that's how everything gets started.
02:21:12.000 That eight hours of downtime with no cigarette is fucking with them when they wake up in the morning.
02:21:17.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:21:18.000 The whole system throughout the night going, okay, let's get this toxin out, let's send all these messages to the brain that this is bad, and we'll deal with it, and then they wake up in the morning, they're like, oh, I feel so bad, I need a cigarette to make me feel bad.
02:21:28.000 I read this book that said...
02:21:30.000 The craving for a cigarette is not necessarily the craving for the cigarette, it's the craving to stop the bad feeling of the cigarette by replacing it with the adrenaline that your body creates by putting the poison inside you again.
02:21:45.000 So you feel shitty because you smoke the cigarette, and what you need to make that shitty feeling go away is to expose yourself to another jolt of the poison so your system goes, okay, let's deal with this adrenaline, throw all those painkillers in there, and then 20 minutes later you get it again.
02:21:58.000 And then 20 minutes later.
02:21:59.000 Where the fuck did you read this?
02:22:00.000 It's a book called something like How to Quit Smoking or Five Steps to Quit Smoking.
02:22:05.000 My trainer played around with smoking cigarettes for a while and I was like, dude, you're my trainer.
02:22:10.000 You can't smoke cigarettes.
02:22:12.000 And he called them, I had him change his language as to how he referred to them.
02:22:16.000 He called them smoky treats.
02:22:18.000 I was like, you can't call cigarettes smoky treats.
02:22:22.000 It sounds like something you give a dog.
02:22:23.000 Yeah, and you know, he's adding little positive affirmations.
02:22:27.000 I'm just going to have a little smoky treat.
02:22:28.000 I'm going to give myself a smoky treat.
02:22:29.000 I was like, no, you're killing yourself.
02:22:31.000 And then he read this book, and it was the reason why he quit.
02:22:33.000 And I was like, let me read it.
02:22:34.000 I don't smoke, but I want to read it.
02:22:35.000 And that was the thing that I took home with me.
02:22:37.000 It was this idea that It's not the fact that the cigarette makes you feel good or you love the feeling or it's five minutes of downtime.
02:22:44.000 It's the fact that that concentrated inhalation of poison is taking away from the shitty feeling that you're getting from the long-term effects of that poison.
02:22:54.000 I don't know about all that, man.
02:22:55.000 I don't know exactly.
02:22:56.000 The way it's been explained to me by addiction experts are that when you have an addiction, like everyone talks about cigarettes calm them down.
02:23:04.000 And the way it was explained to me, it was like, cigarettes don't calm you down.
02:23:07.000 What they do is they feed your addiction.
02:23:10.000 So you have this addiction, you're stressed out because your body is craving this thing that it's attached to.
02:23:15.000 You have some sort of, at a molecular level, you have this bizarre attachment to this substance you've been pumping into your body.
02:23:21.000 So your anxiety ramps up, your body needs it, and then when you get it, ah, so you're like, cigarettes, relax me.
02:23:28.000 No, no, no, no.
02:23:28.000 You're addicted to cigarettes, and that feeding that addiction calms the craving, calms the screaming of the addiction for a brief amount of time, and then it asks for it again.
02:23:40.000 So the idea that cigarettes calm you, no, they don't really.
02:23:44.000 You're extra amped up because of the fact that you're addicted to cigarettes.
02:23:47.000 Yeah.
02:23:48.000 I was very lucky.
02:23:49.000 I grew up with a mom who's a nurse.
02:23:51.000 So my mom exposed me to two things, which stopped me from ever smoking cigarettes.
02:23:57.000 I mean, that's not to say that when I was 17, 18, and one of my best friends walked outside to smoke a cigarette, I didn't go, oh, let me try it.
02:24:03.000 And I cuffed it up and was like, oh, yeah, that's okay.
02:24:06.000 You know, I've danced with that devil.
02:24:07.000 But my mom...
02:24:08.000 Did two things for me.
02:24:09.000 The first one was she told me about people in the hospitals that she was working at that had to have legs amputated, hands amputated, arms amputated due to complications with smoking cigarettes.
02:24:20.000 So I was like, okay, that's fucking heavy.
02:24:22.000 And then the other one was she printed out a list of Which we've all seen by now.
02:24:27.000 The ingredients of a processed cigarette, which is like, you know, fucking cyanide and horse piss.
02:24:34.000 Hundreds and hundreds of different things.
02:24:37.000 I was like, holy shit.
02:24:39.000 You know, yeah, like you said, hundreds if not thousands of things that are a direct fight against health and your system.
02:24:46.000 And I was like, I don't...
02:24:48.000 Did you see the Russell Crowe movie, The Insider?
02:24:50.000 Uh, yeah.
02:24:51.000 The one that was all about the scientists that worked with the tobacco companies to make cigarettes more toxic, or more addictive, rather.
02:24:57.000 Fascinating, fascinating.
02:24:59.000 Apparently based on reality, too.
02:25:00.000 Right, right.
02:25:01.000 Yeah.
02:25:01.000 I watched Inside Out over the weekend.
02:25:04.000 Great!
02:25:05.000 I watched it with my kids.
02:25:06.000 I watched it yesterday.
02:25:07.000 So, I did a review.
02:25:09.000 I do this thing on Twitter called, at the flicks, which is like, if I watch a film that It has had an effect on me.
02:25:14.000 I do a little blurb about what I like about it on a WordPress account.
02:25:19.000 And I thought it was a really interesting movie for a lot of different reasons.
02:25:25.000 One of the major ones is that the way that it's being touted and sold in L.A. is to deal with these very cartoony-like characters that live in this girl's brain.
02:25:37.000 You know, Louis Black has anger and he's all red and...
02:25:40.000 Amy Poehler is Joy, and she's sweet, and then Sadness, who's, like, overweight and has, you know, blue hair and needs her adenoids taken out.
02:25:49.000 But it's...
02:25:50.000 From where I was sitting, it is a comment on the first time a human being has exposed themselves to depression and what it can do at a molecular level to that person and the journey you have to go on.
02:26:04.000 So, like, the B story is all their little relationships with these emotions and stuff, but the A story...
02:26:10.000 Was this really dark story of a girl moving from...
02:26:14.000 Where was she moving from?
02:26:15.000 Minnesota.
02:26:15.000 Minnesota to San Francisco.
02:26:17.000 She lost her friends.
02:26:18.000 She wasn't in the hockey team anymore.
02:26:20.000 She had a slightly different relationship with her parents.
02:26:23.000 School wasn't going away.
02:26:24.000 She ended up trying to be a runaway.
02:26:26.000 And I thought it was brilliant, first and foremost, but it did not feel like a kid's movie to me.
02:26:32.000 And if it was, it was a bitter pill to swallow, because when I was a kid, up until the age of...
02:26:37.000 Up until the age of 15, I really had no concept of depression.
02:26:42.000 I didn't know it existed.
02:26:43.000 I was just a happy-go-lucky kid that was sad when I got less sweets than my brother, but happier when I did.
02:26:49.000 And for the most part, I was just coasting on this happy one.
02:26:51.000 Until you started dating chicks.
02:26:53.000 Someone just slammed me.
02:26:54.000 Is that what happened?
02:26:55.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:26:56.000 What do you mean you want to kiss my best mate more than me?
02:26:58.000 Oh, fuck!
02:27:00.000 You know?
02:27:01.000 I was like, holy shit!
02:27:02.000 I didn't realize it could envelop you.
02:27:04.000 That's when they bring it home.
02:27:05.000 You wear it like a cloak, you know?
02:27:07.000 My whole thing with sadness was just like that.
02:27:09.000 I fell down the stairs, I scraped my knee, I'm sad.
02:27:11.000 Oh, I feel better.
02:27:12.000 I'm going to bed, wake up in the morning.
02:27:14.000 My default setting was happiness.
02:27:15.000 And then with girls and stuff, it became like, oh man, I've been sad for a week and it was depression.
02:27:21.000 Wow.
02:27:21.000 And that thing in that Inside Out movie...
02:27:24.000 I mean, I cried like a fucking baby.
02:27:27.000 Do you remember the short film before it?
02:27:29.000 Lava with the two volcanoes?
02:27:30.000 Yeah, that was great.
02:27:30.000 I was in bits!
02:27:31.000 Were you really?
02:27:32.000 You were crying?
02:27:32.000 Oh, I was crying.
02:27:33.000 I went on a date.
02:27:34.000 I was on a date.
02:27:34.000 I was so embarrassed.
02:27:36.000 You were crying on a date?
02:27:37.000 Yeah.
02:27:37.000 Jesus Christ.
02:27:38.000 She didn't really know.
02:27:39.000 I mean, yeah, she did know.
02:27:40.000 She knew you were crying?
02:27:41.000 I wasn't weeping.
02:27:42.000 How long had you been dating her?
02:27:44.000 I'd been dating for a few weeks.
02:27:46.000 So it's pretty recent, like she's probably ready to bail.
02:27:49.000 Yeah.
02:27:50.000 I would bail.
02:27:51.000 She was crying, but she's a girl, that's fine.
02:27:53.000 She was crying at the lava thing too?
02:27:54.000 Yeah.
02:27:55.000 You're both broken.
02:27:56.000 Yeah, I know.
02:27:56.000 Jesus Christ.
02:27:57.000 We're broken and fucked up instead.
02:28:00.000 What did you think?
02:28:01.000 I thought it was great.
02:28:02.000 Did your kids respond to the stuff in her head and did they respond to the other stuff?
02:28:07.000 Oh yeah, they responded to the whole thing.
02:28:09.000 They loved it.
02:28:11.000 We even went to the bookstore afterwards and we bought some books on it because they have books, inside out books, where they kind of go into depth about all the different things and the impacts of emotions, how you need the sadness and how the sadness can help you change your mind and make decisions.
02:28:29.000 There was one thing which they changed at the very last, that they put into the script, not put into the script at the last minute, but involved in the story at the last minute, that I was going to write a scathing review about that particular thing.
02:28:41.000 Because you know the whole thing about core memories?
02:28:43.000 All the core memories were happy.
02:28:45.000 My thing was going to be, not all your core memories are happy.
02:28:48.000 Some of your core memories are dark and heavy.
02:28:51.000 And they define who you are as a person to the positive.
02:28:53.000 But they did that at the end because sadness took hold of those core memories and they kind of found the balance of like, some are good, some are bad.
02:29:01.000 One of the only things that I wasn't crazy about and I thought it was potentially a little darkness, a little dark, was that when the emotions were navigating their way back to the kind of brain area, they walked through the subconscious and the subconscious was scary and dark and mysterious and black.
02:29:17.000 And potentially things would jump out at you.
02:29:19.000 And my subconscious isn't all like that.
02:29:22.000 Some of my subconscious are tigers drinking cups of tea with saucers and asking me how I am.
02:29:28.000 And I'm in different galaxies, you know, spinning around having fun.
02:29:31.000 So I do have dark elements to my subconscious.
02:29:33.000 But I thought it was a little dangerous to tell little kids anything that lives in the catacombs of your mind is potentially dangerous.
02:29:42.000 I was like, well, some of that could be a poem that's amazing or A song that you wrote or a painting, which is beautiful.
02:29:48.000 That was my only issue.
02:29:50.000 Right.
02:29:50.000 I thought the 3D abstract thing was fantastic.
02:29:53.000 Oh, fuck.
02:29:54.000 They sort of lost their shape.
02:29:57.000 It was really bizarre.
02:29:58.000 And they just ended up becoming shapes.
02:30:00.000 One was like a big star rolling around.
02:30:02.000 So well done.
02:30:03.000 Such a well done movie.
02:30:04.000 And really, like you said, a movie that, even though it was a child's movie, adults could appreciate it.
02:30:10.000 I felt like it worked.
02:30:12.000 Maybe more.
02:30:13.000 Yeah, I felt like it worked on a lot of adult levels that I wrote in this review.
02:30:18.000 I was like, say thank you for the fact that your kids under the age of 10 might not necessarily pick up on some of the heavier themes of this movie.
02:30:27.000 You will at some point reach a point in your life where sadness will smack you in the mouth and you have to deal with it.
02:30:32.000 Like, maybe your 10-year-old isn't ready for that yet, but your 12-year-old might be okay with it because they're going through some changes too.
02:30:38.000 I thought it was brilliant.
02:30:39.000 I've spent a lot of time wondering what those things are there for.
02:30:44.000 Is there a reason why depression exists?
02:30:46.000 Is there a reason why sadness or joy or euphoria, do they serve some sort of evolutionary I mean, is there a reason why they exist that we just have to sort of manage?
02:31:01.000 But I mean, is it really the reason why people have gotten so far?
02:31:05.000 Because we're not just totally content with everything the way it is, and there's always going to be jealousy.
02:31:11.000 There's always going to be, like we were talking about the actors looking at other people going, why is this?
02:31:15.000 Because they've reached some point of success.
02:31:17.000 It's never enough and there's always some new thing that eludes them some new thing that they wishes if they could have that then thing would be better and why is thing fucked up and I don't got them what's wrong?
02:31:28.000 It's almost like these are motivating energies these are motivating elements motivated I mean and the depression thing when you get when you first start dating it's like you It's it's almost like burning your hand on a hot stove like letting you know like you're dealing with something really fucking powerful here and this horrible feeling that you have right now when it's not working out Understand this and understand the consequences of getting involved in a relationship now because it's not so easy as just jumping in with someone It's not so easy
02:31:58.000 as and you learn so much from those fucking early relationships Like I had a manipulative girlfriend in high school not her fault bitch.
02:32:06.000 She's a nice girl Yeah, she is lovely, actually.
02:32:08.000 She was a very nice girl, but she had a single parent.
02:32:11.000 Her mom was quite large, didn't like men, and there was a lot of education going on that was probably not so beneficial.
02:32:20.000 And you were trying to get in her panties, so she didn't learn that.
02:32:22.000 Yeah, I got in there.
02:32:24.000 She got in mind, too.
02:32:25.000 Good for her.
02:32:26.000 She's a dirty little girl.
02:32:27.000 But the point being was that that manipulation that I experienced from her very early on, it made me realize, like, oh, okay, this can happen, too.
02:32:38.000 Like, shit that doesn't happen with my friends can happen with a girl, and then all of a sudden it'll take you...
02:32:44.000 So I developed this intense zero bullshit policy.
02:32:48.000 So when I got When I got older and I became a man, when a woman would try to manipulate me in any way, I'd start laughing, I'd go, that's adorable.
02:32:56.000 But fortunately, I have other options, and so this is not gonna work out anymore, so take care.
02:33:02.000 But if I hadn't gone through that, I mean, I have friends that are fucking perpetual victims, and they get manipulated by women over and over and over again because they're weak.
02:33:11.000 Right.
02:33:11.000 And I think there's a certain amount of women, whether they appreciate it or whether they're honest about it or not, almost can't help manipulating men who are easy to manipulate.
02:33:21.000 Yeah.
02:33:21.000 It's like you can play them.
02:33:24.000 Like, fucking let me play it.
02:33:25.000 Ding, ding, ding.
02:33:26.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:33:26.000 You just want to hit the tunes.
02:33:27.000 And I think there's something natural in that.
02:33:31.000 There's a natural predatory response to weakness.
02:33:35.000 Right.
02:33:35.000 In certain ways and I kind of feel like that's all why all that shit's in place like that it's it's almost like to ensure Momentum to ensure entropy to ensure that energy keeps moving and there's no stagnant I mean if you stay stagnant you will get depressed if you if you don't evolve and don't succeed You'll feel like shit if you know if you get dumped,
02:33:57.000 you know, you're gonna feel horrible You better figure out how to not get dumped, you know Right.
02:34:01.000 Or just, like you said, to handle it.
02:34:03.000 I mean, if a girl's grown up with a mom who she admires, who is also manipulative to her dad, who she also admires, then she may potentially fall into that pitfall trap of doing that to other guys.
02:34:15.000 I mean, you know, as a creature, as a species, biologically, like you said earlier on, we have taken ourselves out of the equation of how do we solve the conundrum of staying warm at night, being protected from predators, where we get our food from.
02:34:27.000 We've solved all that as a creature.
02:34:28.000 So our brain is now giving itself the opportunity to expand more than the physical.
02:34:32.000 You know, most people don't necessarily go to the gym and hit the weights.
02:34:35.000 A lot of people, you know, read and get an education and stuff.
02:34:38.000 So from an evolutionary point of view, the thing that is expanding more than anything else is our brain.
02:34:43.000 Now that's positive and to our detriment, I feel, because we do overthink things and we do get ourselves into a situation.
02:34:50.000 Is this right?
02:34:51.000 Should this be happening to me?
02:34:52.000 I think that you have to look at it as the same...
02:34:56.000 Coin just flipped over in a different way.
02:34:58.000 If you have a great birthday and you get all the gifts that you want and you got the great piece of birthday cake and all your friends showed up, that's beautiful and you experienced it and you loved it and you told all your friends about it and you relive it with your friends and it was one of those days that you always think about when you go to sleep at night because it will help you go to sleep.
02:35:16.000 You need to understand that the day when none of your friends showed up for your birthday party and your parents got your gift that you didn't really want, It's the same thing.
02:35:25.000 You're just viewing it in a different way.
02:35:27.000 You're just viewing that thing as like, oh, this thing is bad.
02:35:30.000 This thing is good.
02:35:31.000 It's just your life.
02:35:32.000 Those things just happen, you know, and you have to have the balance of those two things.
02:35:36.000 So what I tried to do when I was younger, I would suffer from it a lot and I am prone to depression.
02:35:42.000 So I try and Keep myself in a positive headspace.
02:35:46.000 But a great way for me to attack depression when I see it coming is to say, this is natural.
02:35:51.000 This is normal.
02:35:52.000 Peaks and troughs are a way for you to understand the journey that you're in.
02:35:56.000 And you can't If you're getting overly high about something, that's as dangerous as getting overly low about something.
02:36:03.000 It's the bit in the middle that is the balance that makes sense.
02:36:07.000 So if you get overly high, there's a price to pay at the end of this ride.
02:36:10.000 There has to be.
02:36:11.000 Yeah.
02:36:11.000 If you get too drunk, you're going to get hangover.
02:36:14.000 Right.
02:36:14.000 But that hungover is almost worth it to experience the great buzz, those great moments.
02:36:20.000 It's like those great moments that you have when you're drunk.
02:36:23.000 Boy, you fucking pay for them for a couple of days, but they're...
02:36:26.000 Almost worth it.
02:36:27.000 Almost at the time.
02:36:28.000 That is the balance.
02:36:29.000 I've been in situations in my life where I've thought, I've sat around on my own and thought, I think the worst is going to happen.
02:36:40.000 In this situation that I'm in with this girl, or this business scenario, or this day that I'm going to have tomorrow, I think the worst is going to happen.
02:36:49.000 My ultimate nightmare that I can envisage is going to happen.
02:36:53.000 And it's happened.
02:36:55.000 And I have to be okay with the fact that it's happened.
02:36:58.000 And it's never quite as crushingly bad as you make it in your mind.
02:37:03.000 I've been in situations where a girl where I'm like, I know we're breaking up.
02:37:08.000 I just don't want her to fuck that guy.
02:37:10.000 And she fucks that guy.
02:37:11.000 And I'm like, okay, it happened.
02:37:16.000 And you survive it, you know?
02:37:18.000 And that's one of the lessons, is like, you'll get through it.
02:37:20.000 Well, that's a real problem for people who don't ever get through that, and they don't realize that it's not going to be the end of the world.
02:37:26.000 I got lucky, not the girl that I talked about, but another girl that I dated in high school, who was, I don't like to say slut, But there's no other word for her.
02:37:36.000 Okay.
02:37:36.000 She just would fuck anybody.
02:37:38.000 She was a maniac.
02:37:39.000 She was just...
02:37:40.000 Poor girl.
02:37:40.000 She went to Catholic school.
02:37:42.000 They made her...
02:37:42.000 They fucked her head up.
02:37:44.000 They fucked her head up.
02:37:45.000 They made her, you know, just the forbidden fruit.
02:37:49.000 Right, right, right.
02:37:50.000 Well, and also I think she was hormonally very advanced.
02:37:52.000 She was very woman-like at an age of like 17. Everybody was like, Jesus Christ.
02:37:58.000 She was a mess.
02:38:00.000 But she fucked everybody I knew.
02:38:02.000 And I was in love with her at one point in time, I'm sure, whatever you would call in love with.
02:38:06.000 So I got used to that at an early age.
02:38:08.000 Used to the disappointment.
02:38:11.000 It's brutal.
02:38:12.000 Yeah, it can be.
02:38:13.000 But it's fascinating to me that you say that you didn't experience any depression at all until you're 15. But then you say that depression is something that you're prone to.
02:38:22.000 Yeah.
02:38:23.000 I think I am prone to it.
02:38:26.000 But you never experienced it until you started dating.
02:38:30.000 Didn't know what it was.
02:38:31.000 Didn't really know the concept of it.
02:38:33.000 Like I said, sadness for me was like scraping my knee in it.
02:38:35.000 Right, but it was very temporary.
02:38:37.000 So it's not like you had this sort of existential angst that was dragging you down.
02:38:42.000 What is the point?
02:38:43.000 No.
02:38:44.000 I think because I didn't know that it existed, when it hit me for the first time, I had absolutely no defense against it because I'd never...
02:38:53.000 I'd never seen it before.
02:38:54.000 I suddenly walked around a corner and there's a saber-toothed tiger in front of me.
02:38:57.000 And I was like, holy shit, that's terrifying.
02:38:59.000 And it just enveloped me.
02:39:01.000 And then my defences had not been built through my formative child years to go through elements of sadness.
02:39:09.000 Like I said, my foundation and my family, my parents were together.
02:39:11.000 They never fought.
02:39:12.000 They got on well.
02:39:12.000 I had a good relationship with my brother.
02:39:14.000 I did okay at school.
02:39:16.000 I never had those real major challenges, apart from the fact that I knew I was an actor and I was like, what the fuck am I doing...
02:39:22.000 Try to be an actor in Manchester.
02:39:23.000 It's never going to happen.
02:39:24.000 I'm never going to be an actor.
02:39:25.000 I had that angst.
02:39:26.000 But it wasn't like a painful physical or mental angst.
02:39:28.000 It was just something that I was dealing with.
02:39:30.000 So I don't think I had the fortitude to deal with it the first time.
02:39:33.000 And I'm a huge fan of women.
02:39:37.000 And I also probably punched a little bit above my weight when I was younger because I was the smallest kid at school, but I was super mouthy and no one could ever tell me to shut up.
02:39:46.000 So I was always trying to go for...
02:39:48.000 The ultimate girl.
02:39:50.000 And every so often, the ultimate girl would be like, alright, I'll entertain you for a week.
02:39:53.000 And I'd be like, I found her!
02:39:55.000 And then she'd be like, fuck you, I'm going for the jock.
02:39:57.000 I'm like, ah, fuck, I can't even compete with the jock, you know?
02:40:00.000 So I think I didn't give myself pitfalls until the point where my parents had kind of said, It's all you now, you know, 15, 16. They were like, okay, go find out who you're going to be.
02:40:12.000 And at that point, I got a little, you know, exposed to some sadness and stuff.
02:40:17.000 But I also, I just think it's part of life.
02:40:20.000 You know, I have this, you know, on Twitter, I'm constantly, not constantly, but if anyone ever says to me, hey, you know, I've been struggling with this or, you know, this is getting me down or I had a rough day or I've had a rough week or I just, you know, I'm sick with this or whatever.
02:40:33.000 And the way that I respond, the way that I always respond to it is like, you know, This will improve, and you will get to a point where you're able to look back and say, oh, that was a dark period in my life.
02:40:44.000 Otherwise, it's going to all be dark, and then you're going to die, which is a horrible way to live your life.
02:40:51.000 And sometimes it does happen, but you've got to be hopeful about it.
02:40:55.000 But, you know, the way that you make sense, like I said earlier on, of your life is to know, oh, here's a dark place, here's a light place, here's a dark place, here's a light place, and the sweet spot...
02:41:06.000 Is in the middle, you know?
02:41:09.000 There's a great line in The Office, The Ricky Gervais Show.
02:41:11.000 I think he ends the entire show by saying, life is a series of peaks and troughs and you don't know you're in a trough until you're heading up to a peak and you don't know you're in a peak until you're coming down the hill.
02:41:22.000 And that is true of life, right?
02:41:24.000 Like, I don't want my life to be incredibly, hectically happy all the time.
02:41:29.000 I think I would burn out.
02:41:30.000 And obviously...
02:41:32.000 You don't want your life to be incredibly darkly, heavily sad because that's going to kill you too.
02:41:38.000 I want it to just be cruising.
02:41:40.000 I just want to cruise with it.
02:41:42.000 Balance.
02:41:43.000 Balance.
02:41:43.000 It's a huge word for me.
02:41:44.000 I don't usually appreciate LA. I don't usually appreciate the sun, because I'm used to it.
02:41:49.000 I don't usually appreciate civilization and traffic, because I'm used to it, because it's become what it is.
02:41:55.000 But I spent a week on Prince of Wales Island in Alaska, and it rained every day, constantly all day, and we were camping, so we were in these tents, and we were soaking wet, and we had these helmets, or rather Headlights on you know those you strap on and you turn the light on so you could walk around at night and not fall and I turned it on inside my tent and it was just It was it was like it was raining inside the tent because it was just mist it was water mist everywhere It was just it was so wet and just it's just weird.
02:42:25.000 You're just constantly drenched I had a great time.
02:42:27.000 It wasn't a terrible thing but my point is when I came back to LA and And it was sunny and it was just beautiful and just driving around.
02:42:35.000 I called my friend up.
02:42:36.000 I go, dude, I fucking feel fantastic.
02:42:38.000 And it was nothing unusual going on.
02:42:40.000 I mean, it was great stuff.
02:42:42.000 I was doing a podcast.
02:42:43.000 I was going to do standup at night.
02:42:44.000 Everything was normal.
02:42:45.000 But the contrast to being in that miserable fucking rain-soaked island for five days, like all of a sudden now I appreciated it.
02:42:54.000 And I was like, oh, I needed that.
02:42:56.000 I needed that balance.
02:42:57.000 Like sometimes you need to camp to appreciate a house.
02:43:00.000 Sure, the perspective of the whole thing.
02:43:01.000 I have my own issues with LA. I mean, first of all, it's way too hot for me.
02:43:05.000 It's way too hot.
02:43:05.000 I mean, born in Germany, brought up in Manchester until I was 18. A hot, sunny day in either one of those countries is probably 83, 84. That's a big one.
02:43:17.000 Oh, dude, that's a day when people take days off work and they go pie and get drunk in England.
02:43:21.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:43:22.000 That's a day off work.
02:43:23.000 That's January here.
02:43:25.000 Yeah, but like, you know, 91, 92 degrees?
02:43:28.000 I can't handle that now.
02:43:29.000 Oh, that's nothing.
02:43:30.000 It's 100 right now, I'm sure.
02:43:32.000 At least, right?
02:43:33.000 It's probably 100. It gets to 110 on a bad day.
02:43:35.000 Yeah.
02:43:36.000 That's nothing compared to Vegas.
02:43:37.000 Yeah, I know.
02:43:38.000 Yeah.
02:43:38.000 Vegas is brutal.
02:43:39.000 So there's that, but also the major issue that I have in LA, which is something that I'm constantly exploring with my friends, is, unfortunately, the culture, for the most part, is a little jaded.
02:43:52.000 You know, a lot of people come into LA, take as much money as they can out of it, and then leave, and it's been depleted Spiritually and of its soul, you know, of its community.
02:44:02.000 You go to places like Barcelona or Berlin or Wellington or Sydney where people are feeding that city.
02:44:07.000 I get the impression that LA for the most part has things being ripped out of it, taken out of it, like the foundations are being taken out of it.
02:44:14.000 Isn't that a perspective issue though, the way you're viewing it?
02:44:17.000 It could very well be.
02:44:18.000 But I also think that one of the archetypal characters of LA The socialite walking down Sunset Boulevard or the cool guy that wears a white dress shirt and a cowboy hat on a Friday night.
02:44:33.000 Their reaction to see...
02:44:34.000 Who the fuck is that archetype?
02:44:36.000 I don't know.
02:44:36.000 The guys that are in the standard, you know.
02:44:39.000 Dicks.
02:44:40.000 LAUGHTER The guy's in the rooftop bars and shit.
02:44:43.000 The standard.
02:44:43.000 We go there after the comedy store sometimes to eat.
02:44:46.000 Oh, nice.
02:44:46.000 It's a great diner.
02:44:46.000 Damn it.
02:44:47.000 Yeah, it's good food.
02:44:47.000 And I like the people in the tanks and stuff.
02:44:50.000 That's wicked.
02:44:50.000 That's bizarre.
02:44:51.000 Yeah, the standard.
02:44:51.000 Explain that.
02:44:52.000 When you go to check in at the reservations or the desk, there's a woman that is in her underwear that is in, like, a fish tank.
02:45:01.000 Yeah, an aquarium, yeah.
02:45:02.000 It's essentially she's reading a book and she's not allowed to interact with you, so she doesn't look at you.
02:45:07.000 She just lies around this aquarium and reads her book and is in her underwear and it's so fucking L.A. Invariably aesthetically beautiful.
02:45:15.000 Yes, invariably.
02:45:16.000 Which is teaching the people checking into that hotel something very weird about the hotel.
02:45:20.000 Yeah.
02:45:20.000 But anyway, so those archetypes, their reaction to seeing something genuinely impressive, let's say for the sake of argument, it's an animal that we've never seen before crossing Sunset Boulevard and when it gets to the junction of traffic going one way and traffic going another way,
02:45:38.000 it sits in a yogic position and creates this fucking eclipse of bright, hot sunlight.
02:45:44.000 Their reaction to that, if you're doing the cool LA thing, is to go, cool.
02:45:50.000 Not to be like, holy fucking shit, my life just ended.
02:45:53.000 That is the most awesome thing I've seen in my life.
02:45:55.000 The required reaction in LA is to go, awesome.
02:45:59.000 Those are just the people that are trying to fit in.
02:46:02.000 Honestly, I think that LA has so many people and so many people that are trying to make it.
02:46:09.000 And that's a part of the problem.
02:46:10.000 Is that so many people are not doing what they want to do here and they're trying to.
02:46:15.000 And so there's a...
02:46:17.000 A giant population of trying.
02:46:21.000 But there's also a lot of great artists here.
02:46:25.000 There's a lot of great painters here.
02:46:27.000 There's a lot of great musicians here.
02:46:28.000 There's a lot of great comics here.
02:46:29.000 I think as far as stand-up comedy goes, this is the greatest spot on the planet Earth.
02:46:33.000 I don't think there's anything even close.
02:46:35.000 New York is probably a second place, but...
02:46:37.000 Man, it's tough to fuck with LA. And I think as far as architecture and as far as art, there's a lot of contributions.
02:46:46.000 Restaurants, there's a lot of great shit in LA. And street art in downtown and stuff like that.
02:46:51.000 But there's so many people that want to be one of those musicians, that want to be one of those artists, that want to be one of those comedians, that want to be one of those actors, that want to be one of those anything that's important.
02:47:00.000 And so they're trying to be that person.
02:47:02.000 And you're around them all the time.
02:47:04.000 And they're the ones that are going to go, cool.
02:47:06.000 There's the fakers.
02:47:08.000 There's a lot of fakers.
02:47:09.000 You also move in what I would assume to be, for you at least, quite a healthy community of comics that all know each other, that have known each other for 20 years, that hang out on those clubs on Sunset.
02:47:19.000 And you have a nice, you know, little percolating community of people traveling in, traveling out, everyone says hello.
02:47:25.000 I don't have that.
02:47:26.000 I'm a recluse, you know, so I don't hang out with actors.
02:47:29.000 Hang out with us.
02:47:29.000 We'll hook you up.
02:47:30.000 Come on, buddy.
02:47:31.000 I don't have any actor friends.
02:47:33.000 Well, that's good.
02:47:34.000 I mean, I'm friends with people that I've worked with before, but in terms of hanging out, Elijah and I are super tight.
02:47:39.000 I don't necessarily hang out with him that much, apart from little moments.
02:47:41.000 Orlando and I are the same, Billy and I are the same.
02:47:43.000 But they're kind of recluses too, and it's, you know, me going out on Sunset, and certainly, certainly me going out on Sunset with Elijah, or Orlando, or Billy, is a fucking...
02:47:55.000 Who's Billy again?
02:47:55.000 Billy Boyd, who I was in Lord of the Rings with, who played the other Hobbit, the Scottish Hobbit.
02:47:59.000 Right, okay, yeah.
02:48:00.000 That is a fucking zoo.
02:48:02.000 Right, I'm sure.
02:48:03.000 I have no interest in me anymore.
02:48:04.000 Well, that's why those guys are recluses, is because when you get to an Elijah Wood status in life, it's impossible to be normal.
02:48:11.000 It's very hard to go to a restaurant without being this sideshow.
02:48:14.000 Everywhere he goes, people must stare at him.
02:48:16.000 So that's why a guy like that becomes a recluse.
02:48:19.000 Right.
02:48:19.000 You're the animal in the zoo.
02:48:20.000 And what I love about being at home for me is I can control the music.
02:48:24.000 I don't have to listen to shit music.
02:48:25.000 I don't have to pay for the alcohol apart from the thing that I bought in the liquor store.
02:48:28.000 I don't have to upscale the payment of the alcohol.
02:48:30.000 I can watch any movie that I want.
02:48:31.000 I can bring in anyone that I want.
02:48:33.000 But when I'm in a bar scenario, as I'm sure you've experienced over years, People feel like they can come over to you a little bit.
02:48:41.000 And if you add alcohol into that equation...
02:48:43.000 I mean, I've had people in bars where I'm with my buds.
02:48:46.000 Someone will come over with a shot of whatever.
02:48:48.000 Let's say a shot of Jack Daniels.
02:48:50.000 They'll come over and be like, dude...
02:48:51.000 And they'll point at me.
02:48:53.000 And I'll go, yeah?
02:48:53.000 And they'll go, I got your shot.
02:48:55.000 I'm like, oh, I'm okay.
02:48:56.000 I'm drinking vodka.
02:48:57.000 Or I'm drinking tequila.
02:48:58.000 I don't want it.
02:48:59.000 Dude, I got your shot.
02:49:00.000 You're going to turn down a shot?
02:49:02.000 Yeah.
02:49:02.000 Yeah, I don't drink Jack Daniels.
02:49:03.000 If you want to get me a shot of tequila, I'll drink that.
02:49:05.000 Or...
02:49:06.000 Maybe I'm just not going to drink anyway.
02:49:07.000 I'm with my friends.
02:49:08.000 I'm just going to do my thing.
02:49:09.000 They'll get pissy and moany because I'm not drinking their shot.
02:49:13.000 First of all, I didn't ask you to come over to me.
02:49:14.000 Secondly, I didn't ask you to buy me a drink.
02:49:15.000 Thirdly, you're interrupting friends who all know each other and you're a complete stranger.
02:49:19.000 I've had people put their hands on me in bars, like put their arms around me and try and walk me over to their friends without asking my permission.
02:49:27.000 That happens all the time.
02:49:27.000 Dude, get your fucking hands off me.
02:49:29.000 I don't come from where you go.
02:49:31.000 Well, people that know you from television or know you from the movies, they think they know you.
02:49:36.000 And so they also think in some weird way that you owe them something.
02:49:39.000 Totally.
02:49:40.000 You're Charlie from Lost.
02:49:41.000 Right.
02:49:41.000 No, come on.
02:49:42.000 Come over to our table.
02:49:43.000 I want my friends to meet you.
02:49:44.000 I loved your show.
02:49:45.000 Okay, that's great.
02:49:46.000 I was in Vegas once, and I had a mouthful of food.
02:49:48.000 I'm cutting this steak, and I'm putting it in my mouth, and this woman goes, I'm from Canada.
02:49:53.000 Come over to our table.
02:49:54.000 We have friends from Canada that want to meet you.
02:49:56.000 I go, you fucking crazy bitch.
02:49:58.000 Yeah, I'm good.
02:49:58.000 Did you not see me eating with 20 other people?
02:50:01.000 I'm just going to come over to your group of fucking friends.
02:50:03.000 Yeah, and put on a clown hat and give you jazz hands.
02:50:05.000 And then when I said, I'm eating right now.
02:50:07.000 I said, when I'm leaving, if I leave and I run into you guys, I'd be happy to say hi.
02:50:11.000 But right now, I'm eating dinner with some friends.
02:50:14.000 And she looked at me like I was the biggest piece of shit.
02:50:16.000 I wasn't mean to her.
02:50:18.000 But it's that same thing.
02:50:20.000 But I've also had...
02:50:21.000 I've had great experiences in bars, where I've run into great people, and I feel like when you put yourself in those positions where you could be uncomfortable, sometimes those uncomfortable positions, I'll have fantastic conversations with some random dude who makes cabinets or some shit like that, or some guy who,
02:50:38.000 you know, whatever, I'm making my own vodka, you know, you want to try it?
02:50:41.000 Oh, okay, how'd you get into that?
02:50:42.000 And then you have these conversations with people, as long as the people are cool, but it's like, You can't get queered off of people.
02:50:48.000 Here it goes again with that fucking statement.
02:50:50.000 I keep saying, I don't know where I got that from, but it's been popping in my head.
02:50:54.000 It doesn't have anything to do with homosexuals, ladies and gentlemen.
02:50:56.000 Please don't get angry at me.
02:50:57.000 It's more the exact definition of the word, which means peculiar.
02:51:00.000 Yeah.
02:51:00.000 Peculiar off.
02:51:01.000 When you get...
02:51:03.000 When people put you off like that, you can get put off to people.
02:51:06.000 But I don't want to be that guy.
02:51:08.000 So I don't hide.
02:51:09.000 I go out, I go to bars, and I will occasionally run into drunk retards.
02:51:13.000 But for the most part, I feel like if you put that out there, that you're just a normal person, you might know who I am, but I swear to God I'm normal, most of the time you run into people who kind of accept that vibe.
02:51:26.000 Same thing like you were talking about the Cobra, kind of recognizing exactly what you are and figuring it out after a while.
02:51:32.000 If you put out that vibe like you can't be fucked with or everybody's annoying to you, then people find you annoying.
02:51:39.000 For me, it's just a bar scenario.
02:51:42.000 Walking around on the streets and stuff, I would say 90% of the interactions that I have, maybe even 95% of the interactions that I have, In a bar, because it adds alcohol, that is a completely different scenario.
02:51:53.000 And I don't come into bars with my backup.
02:51:56.000 I'm usually having fun with my friends.
02:51:58.000 One of the phrases that I use a lot in terms of animals and humans is, come at me correctly.
02:52:03.000 You have to come at me correctly.
02:52:05.000 If you're coming at me aggressively, dude, I bought you a tequila, let's go, dude!
02:52:09.000 I'm going to be like, dude, go away.
02:52:11.000 You're going to run into that.
02:52:12.000 It just happens all the time.
02:52:12.000 You must get insulated because you're associated with...
02:52:16.000 Cage fighting, and you're a big dude.
02:52:17.000 I don't, though.
02:52:18.000 Really?
02:52:18.000 Sometimes the opposite.
02:52:19.000 Because of that, people want to fuck with me, or people want to talk to me weird, or they want to hold on to me.
02:52:26.000 They want to feel my body.
02:52:27.000 They grab my neck.
02:52:28.000 They grab my shoulders.
02:52:29.000 Oh, you're a big dude.
02:52:30.000 You're a big dude.
02:52:31.000 People get weird.
02:52:32.000 There's just a certain amount of weird people that you're going to run into, and they probably don't even know why they're acting the way they're acting when they do.
02:52:38.000 They probably feel like, what the fuck is wrong with me?
02:52:40.000 Why am I being so retarded?
02:52:42.000 Yeah, exactly.
02:52:43.000 It was almost like an out-of-body experience.
02:52:44.000 They're all floopy around.
02:52:45.000 It's fucking Charlie!
02:52:47.000 Charlie, you're right here!
02:52:48.000 Drink my booze!
02:52:50.000 Charlie, let me hang out with you.
02:52:52.000 Let's say they met their auntie randomly or their uncle randomly on the street.
02:52:55.000 They would do stuff they would never do with their uncle or auntie.
02:52:58.000 I've had people scream at me in airports, Charlie!
02:53:02.000 I'm just like, fucking...
02:53:03.000 You would never do that.
02:53:04.000 Be like, Uncle Derek!
02:53:06.000 You'd go over and say hello to Uncle Derek, you know?
02:53:08.000 Yes, it's true.
02:53:09.000 But do you find that with fighters?
02:53:10.000 Obviously, I mean, I don't know how many fighters you know, but obviously you fraternize.
02:53:14.000 They get fucked with, yeah.
02:53:14.000 Like, you were off in the outside and shit.
02:53:16.000 Oh, yeah, I've seen it, yeah.
02:53:17.000 I've seen them get fucked with.
02:53:18.000 It's ridiculous, you know?
02:53:20.000 Some people are just drunk, and they also, they don't like the idea that they feel intimidated by this guy being around them, and they want to, like, put that guy in his place, you know?
02:53:30.000 And there's also people that are just complacent.
02:53:33.000 I've run into so many guys who want to tell me how if they fought in the UFC, they would kill everybody.
02:53:38.000 But they can't do it right now because they're busy with some other shit.
02:53:41.000 I could take Dylan Jones, dude.
02:53:43.000 I've had so many fucking people tell me that.
02:53:45.000 Bro, my mentality.
02:53:47.000 They all have the same thing.
02:53:48.000 Like, I don't quit, man.
02:53:49.000 You have to kill me.
02:53:51.000 And you're not gonna.
02:53:53.000 There's so many dummies out there.
02:53:54.000 There's a certain amount of people out there that have 9-volt brains.
02:53:58.000 And there's not a goddamn thing, not enough books they can read, not enough life experiences.
02:54:03.000 They just have shit genetics.
02:54:06.000 And that's real.
02:54:07.000 We've been taught that everyone is born on an even playing field, and it's about you to find yourself.
02:54:12.000 No, there's some people that are ditch diggers, and there's not a goddamn thing you can do about it.
02:54:17.000 It sucks.
02:54:17.000 It sucks if you're one of them.
02:54:19.000 Survival of the fittest.
02:54:20.000 Yeah, and sometimes ditch diggers have smart kids, but sometimes they don't.
02:54:24.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:54:24.000 My best friend, who's a smart guy, he's a firefighter in Manchester.
02:54:28.000 And I went backwards and forwards for a long time on the fact that he thought that he could take Ronda Rousey.
02:54:33.000 And I was like, she will break both your arms.
02:54:36.000 How big is he?
02:54:37.000 Oh, he's like your size.
02:54:38.000 Does he know how to fight?
02:54:39.000 He was a tough guy at school.
02:54:41.000 And like those dickheads that you see in the street, he's like, yeah, but I'm going to let a girl punch me in the face and it's over.
02:54:46.000 I'm like, no, Ronda Rousey's not going to punch you in the face.
02:54:48.000 She's going to put you in a chokehold or she's going to put you in a submission where she breaks both your arms.
02:54:52.000 And then she stands on your face.
02:54:53.000 She can tap grown men who are professional fighters.
02:54:56.000 I've seen it.
02:54:57.000 You just don't know.
02:55:00.000 There's a level of talent and ability that some people have that supersedes the sexual...
02:55:08.000 Totally.
02:55:09.000 The ideas that we have, the classifications of, you know, a man can't beat up a woman, or a woman can't beat up a man, rather.
02:55:15.000 Yeah, no, they can.
02:55:17.000 There's another girl, Chris Cyborg, she'd beat the fuck out of most men, you know, and do it in a very manly way.
02:55:24.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:55:24.000 And Rousey's technique is so strong, like, you can't fuck with that.
02:55:27.000 Her judo's spectacular, and her arm bars are amongst the best I've ever seen in any weight class with men, women, anybody.
02:55:34.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's phenomenal.
02:55:35.000 One of the scariest dudes for me, I think he's been injured for a little bit, but I saw him, you commentated on this fight, and it was truly terrifying to watch was Rory McDonald.
02:55:46.000 Oh, Rory's a beast.
02:55:47.000 Rory McDonald owned some English guy where he broke his cheek and broke his nose.
02:55:52.000 Yeah.
02:55:52.000 And I watched it.
02:55:55.000 I couldn't believe what I was seeing.
02:55:56.000 And I rewound it.
02:55:58.000 And the reason why he went off like that is he got caught.
02:56:01.000 Rory McDonald got caught by something.
02:56:03.000 And you said it.
02:56:03.000 You were like, oh, he got caught there.
02:56:05.000 And just he got caught.
02:56:06.000 He tied the guy up, put him on the floor and was like, fuck this nonsense and destroyed his face.
02:56:11.000 Yeah.
02:56:11.000 And he's got like a Terminator vibe going on with him.
02:56:14.000 He's just like...
02:56:15.000 Yeah, he goes dead.
02:56:16.000 He gets dead behind the eyes.
02:56:17.000 Isn't he one of George St. Pierre's boys?
02:56:19.000 Yes.
02:56:19.000 Yeah, he trains in there for Asahabi in Montreal.
02:56:22.000 He was phenomenal.
02:56:24.000 Is he injured?
02:56:24.000 No, he's fighting for the title.
02:56:26.000 Oh, good for him.
02:56:26.000 July 11th.
02:56:27.000 Good for him.
02:56:27.000 In Vegas.
02:56:28.000 Woo-hoo!
02:56:29.000 That's the undercard of the Jose Aldo, Conor McGregor fight.
02:56:32.000 He's fighting Robbie Lawler, who's the champion right now.
02:56:35.000 Yeah, fuck.
02:56:36.000 It's a wild fight.
02:56:37.000 Good luck to him.
02:56:37.000 Yeah, it's a great fight.
02:56:38.000 What about JSP? Is he done?
02:56:42.000 Hopefully.
02:56:43.000 Me, I have a different stance than the rest of the UFC, I think.
02:56:45.000 They want him to come back because he's worth a lot of money.
02:56:47.000 I think he's had enough.
02:56:49.000 I think he's in his 30s and he took a tremendous amount of punishment in his career and did the greatest thing you could ever do.
02:56:56.000 He won the title, defended it a bunch of times.
02:57:00.000 In my opinion, he's the greatest welterweight in history.
02:57:03.000 And it's not going to get any better from here.
02:57:04.000 He's taken over 800 shots to the head in competition in the UFC. I think it was like 880-something they counted.
02:57:12.000 And that's just in training.
02:57:14.000 I mean, that's just in fighting, not training.
02:57:16.000 Yeah.
02:57:16.000 I mean, one of the saddest things that I've ever seen in UFC is when you spoke to him, I think, after his fight, and he was like...
02:57:24.000 A little rattled, and he was like, I'm gonna take a break for a little bit.
02:57:27.000 And you were like, are you retiring?
02:57:28.000 And he was like, I don't know, I need to step back.
02:57:30.000 And I looked at this guy that was caught like a Greek god, and I thought, he's about to cry right there.
02:57:37.000 Like, he's done.
02:57:38.000 And the pressure on him to come back, I think is really unfair, because...
02:57:42.000 Like, the most precious thing for him to hang onto now is his mind, and he looked like he was just about to lose it.
02:57:49.000 Well, you know, he's had some memory issues.
02:57:52.000 I had him on the podcast, and he was talking about he didn't know whether or not he had been abducted by aliens.
02:57:58.000 Because he would have these moments in his life where all of a sudden he was at home and he didn't know how he got there.
02:58:04.000 And I was like, whoa, that's not aliens.
02:58:07.000 These are probably issues that you're developing from trauma.
02:58:12.000 But in his mind, it's almost aliens, like something's wrong.
02:58:19.000 When you start talking like that, it's not like he's talking like that and he has no history whatsoever of being hit, no history whatsoever of any sort of brain injury.
02:58:30.000 You're talking about a guy whose fucking job is to break people's brains and he's training with other trained killers and they're hitting each other on a regular basis.
02:58:39.000 There's a point of no return in fighting, and you've got to realize where that point is.
02:58:44.000 And it's very hard for fighters to recognize it.
02:58:46.000 They need someone to help them and talk to them about it.
02:58:49.000 But George is one of the rare few that did it on his own terms while he was on top as a champion retired.
02:58:56.000 I applaud him for that.
02:58:57.000 I think he's amazing.
02:58:58.000 Yeah, I think he's fantastic.
02:58:59.000 And he seems to have come from a foundation of support and obviously doesn't come from...
02:59:03.000 This country and it feels like he has a nice kind of backbone.
02:59:07.000 He's got plenty of money too.
02:59:08.000 He made millions and millions of dollars.
02:59:11.000 He made more money than anybody so hopefully he'll be fine.
02:59:14.000 You know one of the things that happens in the football community, in the soccer community in England is that these very talented, very elite sports stars that have no idea how to do their own washing or do their own groceries or write a check.
02:59:28.000 We're good to go.
02:59:45.000 And I can't function in society in the way that most people do.
02:59:50.000 So they're in no man's land, you know.
02:59:51.000 Do you find that with fighters?
02:59:53.000 Oh, yeah.
02:59:53.000 It's even worse because they're brain damaged, a lot of them.
02:59:56.000 I mean, there's a certain amount of brain damage almost every fighter has by the time they reach 35. And, I mean, we experience that with all sorts of athletes in America, whether it's football players, basketball players.
03:00:08.000 It's a crazy thing because most people, they have the highest earning potential when they're older.
03:00:12.000 You know, as they get older, they make more and more money, they become more and more successful, and then they retire.
03:00:17.000 With athletes, you make the bulk of your money when you're young and wild and irresponsible and impulsive, and then you're supposed to try to hold on to that gold dust as you get older.
03:00:26.000 Right.
03:00:26.000 I think we're out of time.
03:00:26.000 The Rock's new show on HBO is about this.
03:00:28.000 Yeah.
03:00:30.000 It's a little funny, but...
03:00:31.000 We just ran out of time.
03:00:32.000 Boom!
03:00:32.000 We just hit the three-hour mark.
03:00:33.000 Love it.
03:00:34.000 Thank you, Dom.
03:00:35.000 That was awesome, man.
03:00:36.000 Yeah, man.
03:00:36.000 I really, really appreciate it.
03:00:37.000 Yeah, me too.
03:00:37.000 It was a really fun conversation.
03:00:38.000 You should do this more often.
03:00:39.000 You're around here, right?
03:00:39.000 Yeah, man, I'm here.
03:00:40.000 All right, let's do it.
03:00:40.000 All right.
03:00:41.000 All right, Dominic Monahan, ladies and gentlemen.
03:00:43.000 Dom's Wild Things on Twitter.
03:00:44.000 Tweet him.
03:00:45.000 Tell him you love him.
03:00:46.000 Peace!
03:00:46.000 See ya.
03:00:48.000 Are we all fair now?
03:00:49.000 Yeah.