In this episode, the boys talk about Hannah Montana, The Voice, weed, and much more! We hope you enjoy, sit down, and have a nice rest of your day. Love ya. -The Guys Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Thank you for listening and supporting this podcast. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your content. It helps spread the word about the podcast and make it more accessible to more people. Thanks to everyone who has been a supporter of the podcast, stay tuned for more episodes coming soon! XOXO, The Guys. Xoxo - The Guys Music: The Boys by PSODOD and Typos. We are in no way affiliated with the Jim Carrey Company, but we are a proud supporter of his music and we love the music he makes. Thank you so much for all the support you have shown so far, it means a lot to us. xoxo. The boys - The Crew. This episode is dedicated to all the hard work that went into making this podcast possible. All the love and hard work put into this podcast has been put into it. and we appreciate all the love, respect, support, and appreciation. Love you all. -The Boys -Your continued support is so appreciated. (and we appreciate you all of your support. <3 -P.S. . -the boys Thankyou. ~ - the Crew - Your support is very much appreciated! -The Crew is - Thank you -A very special thank you, and your support is much appreciated. -Your support is greatly appreciated! -D.A. -A.M. & Thank you. -TOO MUCH LOVE. -PODCAST -SORRY FOR ALL THE LOVE & SUPPORTED AND SUPPORTED! -PRAISE! -TODAY'S DADDY'S MYS, JOSEPHAPPY MENTIONED, RYAN DADDITIONAL PODCAST AND KISS, JUICY, SONGS, JOKES, DOGS, MALAYA, KISS & JAY & KISS
00:03:06.000And then we started to talk about Birdman.
00:03:08.000And I was like, yeah, I kind of like Birdman.
00:03:10.000And he went on a 10-minute rant, like, fuck Birdman, the movie's pretentious, and he's just like, man, I like Birdman, but I don't know if I like it as much as you hate it.
00:06:09.000And I'm like, that is not for me at all.
00:06:13.000And so then I just walk out cold, like, hello, I'm him, and start trying to do comedy, and people were just like, where's Umphreys McGee's?
00:06:43.000Rappers are bands open for me also, and sometimes the crowd, some people in the crowd are into it, some people aren't, but it's music that I enjoy, so I try to just mix it up sometimes and have a bit of a variety show versus just straight stand-up.
00:08:42.000And then I talked about that on stage, but most of that crowd was like white kids from the suburbs, and then it just turned from there, and it just got restless, and then some dude just yelled out for no reason.
00:09:52.000You point to almost as if someone's success, even though it's astronomical, crazy success, even to a really successful guy like you, It'll fuck with you.
00:11:35.000So if they order their food sit-down, I order my food sit-down.
00:11:39.000And then I go on my phone and I Google DePaul Women's Volleyball and look at last year and look at the roster and I look over there and I say, Hey Ashley,
00:12:05.000And then her friend pipes up, hey, we had a lot of good individual accomplishments.
00:12:09.000We set some individual records last year.
00:12:11.000And I was like, so you guys had bad team chemistry, huh?
00:12:16.000But, yeah, it was just, I felt the need to dig back, because I was just grabbing some fucking tacos, and she just made me feel weird just by being there.
00:12:24.000Well, she felt like she could get a free shot at you, because you're famous.
00:17:41.000Doesn't like me at all, or is just bad at showing it, doesn't, can't even fake, just wants to be at the fights and shit.
00:17:49.000So, we get back to the room, getting ready, it's like three-ish, so getting ready, I'm like, I'm gonna see the whole thing, go see the prelims.
00:22:29.000Even in a place like that, if you went to a place like Ketchikan, Alaska, and there was a Four Seasons, with some sort of fireplace that has broken glass in it, one of those weird ones, you'd be like, what the fuck is this?
00:24:46.000Because if Trump wins, Obama will make so much fucking money talking about democracy and giving speeches about what it's like to be a president and what it's like to run the greatest nation in the world.
00:24:59.000He's gonna be fine either way, but he could literally double his money if Trump wins.
00:25:04.000Here's a theory a lot of people have said, I don't think he wants to win.
00:25:08.000Do you think he wants to win with the moves he's been pulling?
00:26:42.000Because there's a part of America that when Caitlyn Jenner won the Woman of the Year after being a woman for six months, and when ESPN did that giant piece on her, and they're fucking flying over her house with a helicopter, and the drapes are blowing in the breeze, and she's hiding in the shadows, and you're like,
00:27:16.000I think there's like an ebb and flow to shit.
00:27:19.000I think when things go too left wing, too progressive, too transgenders in the bathroom, all that crazy shit, when that goes down, there's a part of America that's just not ready yet.
00:31:04.000I think that's just a product of the internet, people being able to react to something and people being able to gather together on something and then start A petition.
00:34:26.000But I think those people that you're talking about, that you can't believe they think that way...
00:34:30.000They're a product of whatever the fuck happened to them in their world.
00:34:33.000Like, there's pockets of the world that are all a mess right now.
00:34:37.000And if you were born in that pocket or I was born in that pocket in the same sort of circumstances, that's one of the things that it's hard to recognize as a person.
00:34:45.000You see someone's an asshole, you just go, that's a fucking asshole.
00:34:48.000But in a way, we kind of look at those people and go, damn, they just got fucked.
00:34:54.000They got born into a group of dummies with a bunch of violent tendencies and crime and bullshit and nonsense, and this is all they've ever known, and they're just trying to get by.
00:35:03.000And, you know, a guy like Trump comes along, like, yes, finally!
00:35:10.000And if it wasn't Trump, it could be a number of motivational speakers all throughout the country that might have nefarious intentions.
00:35:19.000Anybody who's really super charismatic now, it's kind of open game.
00:35:23.000When a guy like Trump can come along and talk as much crazy shit as he has, In some ways, I'm not opposed to him winning.
00:35:32.000Because in some ways, I'm like, look, he is the best guy to fuck this system in the ass.
00:36:27.000And I'm sure there's like a lot of us, me included, that we're upset because there's some things on one side that I agree with, some things on another side that I agree with, and some things that aren't being represented at all.
00:36:39.000Like the idea that these two people, whatever opinions they discuss are the only opinions that we should all be talking about, that's crazy.
00:37:11.000We're getting hoodwinked by a group of people that are just controlling this ancient system.
00:37:17.000And it's not a good system, and they know it's not a good system, but the only way you could ever stop this system is you have to have people with pure hearts and minds that are willing to admit the system sucks.
00:37:28.000So they're going to lose whatever position of influence that they have and step back and be judged by the merit of their own ideas again.
00:37:35.000Instead of being a senator or a congressman or a president, they just say, look, this system sucks.
00:38:42.000Here's the weirdest thing about that impulse.
00:38:45.000When you see someone out there in the world, when you see someone that you admire, whether it's an athlete or a brilliant scholar or whoever the fuck it is, you see someone, a musician, you see someone you really admire, that person has accomplished something amazing.
00:39:46.000Like, you know, some great person in history that's done something amazing.
00:39:51.000And you look at them and you're like, wow, I would love it if that great person of wisdom and accomplishment, if that person would step up and be president.
00:39:59.000That doesn't necessarily have to be the case in America.
00:40:22.000Old people can dream, but don't dream so big.
00:40:24.000Dude, you're 30 and you're thinking about retiring.
00:40:26.000I'm Yeah, 33. You're already buying hotels and thinking about an exit strategy.
00:40:32.000Yeah, I'm thinking about 100% because I like this.
00:40:35.000I enjoy this, but I mean, I see how I can go.
00:40:39.000I just see how I look at how other people have handled their moment and how other people have handled their finances, and I don't want any part of that.
00:40:49.000So I'm making every step, everything I do, Every day is about being super stable seven years from now and comfortable and to have enough passive income where I don't have to worry about that.
00:41:20.000Just look, I mean, it's just, you know, not just spending smart and just, I research a lot now and just, you know, shift my internet time from the bullshit to just looking at properties and just...
00:41:48.000I don't want to be on some goofy ass show that I don't want to be doing eight years from now where you're like, oh, he definitely needed the money.
00:41:56.000I don't want to do anything that I don't want to do.
00:42:08.000I haven't done that much, that many different TV shows.
00:42:11.000There's a bunch of dudes out there right now working in lumberyards, driving trucks, taking meth, trying to stay awake, listening to us right now, going, you fucking bitches are complaining about being on a shitty TV show.
00:42:39.000I was on the show called Hardball, and it started out, these guys who wrote it, they wrote for The Simpsons, they wrote for Married With Children, Jeff Martin and Kevin Curran, really smart guys.
00:45:48.000I just went into interview mode as I got some ice.
00:45:51.000You know, I think I kind of went into it not, you know, not really knowing...
00:45:57.000I mean, I learned later on how to run things better and how to give people direction on what I needed a little bit better, but I don't think we came in with a focus.
00:46:08.000Because I was thinking with a TV show, not that we would completely...
00:46:51.000Outside of a television show, if you were just sitting around and someone said, Hannibal, I want you to just be your creative self, would you ever gravitate towards writing sketches?
00:47:41.000Everybody wanted to be on Saturday Night Live because Eddie Murphy was on there.
00:47:44.000Everybody wanted to be on sketch comedy shows because that would lead to these big careers like Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider and all these people that became these huge movie stars, right?
00:47:56.000So we all gravitated towards acting, and then there were sitcoms where Roseanne made all this money, and then Seinfeld made all this money.
00:48:04.000He's like, oh shit, I gotta get a sitcom.
00:48:06.000But when I was on that bad sitcom, halfway in, I was like, this is not what I wanted to do.
00:48:15.000Now with a guy like you, what I want to hear is you talk about everything.
00:48:20.000I want to hear you doing prepared shit if that's what you want to do.
00:48:25.000What I would want to hear from you, if I was a producer and I was a network and I was Comedy Central, I would say Hannibal, listen, fuck all these executives.
00:48:37.000I don't want a bunch of people filtering the Hannibal vision.
00:48:41.000When Doug Stanhope and I did The Man Show, which was a giant mistake, one of the big problems with that show was...
00:48:49.000If Doug and I had a fucked up idea, by the time it would get to the- it would be all watered down by the time it would ever get to the television.
00:48:56.000There's no way you could just have some- the only way to do that is like the internet.
00:49:00.000The internet is the only way where you could just- like if someone was smart, they would come along and they would say, listen, if I was Comedy Central, I would say Hannibal.
00:49:09.000It's just like- And we're just going to give you a production team and just come up with whatever the fuck you want to come up with.
00:50:10.000But if he got a million people an episode, like, you could easily, if you had a crazy viral video, like some of Joey Diaz's videos, they probably have close to a million, right?
00:50:20.000How many of Joey's things on This Is Not Happening have more than a million?
00:50:25.000Find out what Joey Diaz's stories on This Is Not Happening have.
00:50:30.000Yeah, because people, I mean, it's just, people can watch it on their phone, they can watch whatever, they share it on their- And they hear it and they tell your friends.
00:50:37.000So if you did that, and you had a show like that, it was just you, if you really want to do a show, just you doing whatever the fuck you think is funny, I'd watch it.
00:51:20.000We're like maybe a year or two away from the idea of being on a television show being no different than the idea of being on a YouTube show.
00:52:03.000I mean, that's how Comedy Central now...
00:52:06.000Judges the success of the show, not just on air, the initial air, they judge it based on the Facebook shares, the YouTube stuff, the Snapchat thing, and all of that.
00:52:20.000It's a combined formula that they use to judge the success of the show.
00:52:51.000How is there not a million of these weird websites where you can just upload video anytime you want and watch the craziest shit all day long?
00:54:44.000I mean, if you want to talk about an incredible...
00:54:48.000Example of success like YouTube is the only video upstream place that everybody or upload place that everybody recognizes Instantly yeah in the sea of the internet Yes, sir.
00:58:32.000Honestly, if the girl was going to go with you, and you knew you were going to get your freak on, would you have taken the gig over the movie, or would you have broken her heart and not taken her back to the motherland?
00:58:43.000I would have taken her back another time.
00:58:49.000I'm on Fast and the Furious 56. If I was a girl, I'd be so pissed if a dude broke my crazy trip to Israel for Fast and the Furious 56. To do three lines in it?
00:59:59.000Because I'm making it up as I go along.
01:00:00.000Because it made it sound like, when you said the bear's friends, it made it sound like it could be like a giraffe or like some other animals.
01:02:16.000So sad people not being able to be themselves because they met so many people along the way that weren't themselves and they're like, God damn it, I can't show you yet.
01:13:07.000That's why it's like, I think it's not their fault.
01:13:12.000If someone's hanging around us, there's been situations like that before.
01:13:17.000Where someone is like weaseled into a conversation between me or you or me it was me and Diaz and some other dude the other night and this guy came up to us and just Sandwiches way into a conversation in the kitchen.
01:13:28.000Yeah, I'm like, how'd you get back here?
01:13:30.000Like why come on man like but part of me Part of me thinks like if I was that guy, how would I do it right?
01:13:42.000You know, you're at the comedy store, you're supposed to go left to take a leak, and you go right, and you're into the kitchen, and Joey Diaz is talking to Ari Shafir and Hannibal, and you guys are all hanging out, and hilarious fucking stories are being told,
01:13:58.000and you just want to stand there and stare.
01:14:06.000If those guys hated me, if for some reason those guys wouldn't be my friends anymore, I'm like, I don't know what the fuck I did, but damn, I gotta find a hole in this vent so I could listen in on them talk.
01:14:15.000Dude, and one of the weirdest interactions I had with a fan, which I have a lot, because I go out a lot and go drinking, and so I'm super exposed all the time.
01:18:53.000From someone who's been interrupted while you're eating, it is annoying.
01:18:57.000But I've always tried to figure out, like, okay, what is...
01:19:02.000What's the difference between how weird it is for me to be eating for someone to come up to me than it is for them?
01:19:07.000I've gotten better at that too over time where I put myself in the spot and I'm nice and I remember what it is to them for them to ask for that.
01:19:18.000Yeah, listen man, I got a man crush on Anthony Bourdain and every time I hang around with him I feel goofy.
01:19:30.000The guy takes up jiu-jitsu when he's 58 years old.
01:19:33.000I think in certain situations, you have to understand the way you feel around someone is affected by your respect for them, and sometimes it gets weird.
01:19:46.000If a dude comes up to you and is like, Hey Hannibal, think I got a picture?
01:19:50.000And you're like, I'm eating right now, man.
01:19:53.000And they don't even know what the fuck they're saying.
01:19:56.000If I'm a Hannibal fan and I walk up and you got a mouth full of wings, I'm like, just real quick, let's take this picture, I got the fuck out of here.
01:20:22.000I do more often now, so you're thinking about it.
01:20:26.000I'm aware of it when people come up to me and I just remember what it is that it...
01:20:34.000It's a privilege that they, you know, support my work and try to just give them that moment.
01:20:42.000But even still, sometimes motherfuckers are genuinely rude, and sometimes people can be entitled, and sometimes people don't care if you're talking to three women.
01:24:05.000They're tracking people from a satellite, how fast they're moving?
01:24:09.000I mean, I can't get into the super specifics of it.
01:24:13.000Mark Cuban invested in them in 2014. I found them on accident when I was looking up some pharmaceutical company called Catalyst, and for some reason my brain put Catapult.
01:24:27.000Then I found this company, started looking it up.
01:26:40.000How does something on your chest measure what you're doing with your legs?
01:26:43.000Like, how do those iPhone apps measure your strides and how many steps you take in miles?
01:26:49.000They can do it off of, like, it's not easy math, but they can tell how far, like, if you're six foot, they know how long, like, the bounce.
01:27:49.000So these dudes that are playing soccer, they monitor all that too?
01:27:54.000How much each team runs and all that shit?
01:27:57.000In football, they just recently, over the last couple of years, stopped hitting in practice.
01:28:00.000Not because they found out about concussions and whatnot, but it's also added technology.
01:28:05.000When I was at Cowboys training camp last week, there was a guy telling me they brought in 8K cameras for when Tony Romo was hurt so he could sit in a truck in the back of practice and watch real-time Football practice with a headset on, like VR stuff.
01:29:13.000I got the S18. Oh man, you should have waited for the 19. I know, I know, but I'm pretty happy with the 18. I mean, it doesn't take as much battery life.
01:30:04.000Yeah, I mean it was hours and hours and hours and hours and it was over a long and I'm not complaining I'm just saying you have to say so much stuff and there's me man.
01:30:14.000They even scanned me and they put me in the game.
01:30:18.000Yeah, I'm in the game you have to have a secret unlockable I gotta have a code like the Konami code.
01:30:24.000Oh I did this so I can get out of doing more commentary.
01:33:35.000I want to see that more than I want to see anything in life.
01:33:37.000I wish I had something to say about that.
01:33:39.000I want to see more than I want to see the Aurora Borealis, more than I want to go to the Keck Observatory in Hawaii and revisit the Milky Way, more than I want to see any of those things, I want to see Nick Diaz versus Conor McGregor.
01:35:25.000And he's just getting chewed up with this left power leg kick right from the beginning, like over and over and over and over again.
01:35:32.000When you get hit with a bunch of really powerful leg kicks like that, it makes it super difficult for you to move.
01:35:38.000And then Conor just fought a smooth, smart game plan.
01:35:43.000He engaged from the outside, where his speed was an advantage, and did some damage, but didn't unload himself like he did in the first fight.
01:35:54.000In the first fight he did that too, but then he unloaded himself.
01:35:58.000And Nate survived, and when he survived, Conor's gas tank was empty.
01:36:01.000So this time, Conor was way more conservative.
01:36:03.000Yeah, I would say he would run away a little.
01:38:57.000Especially, like, that's why I'm glad I didn't fight that guy, and I'm glad I don't, you know, put myself in a situation where I gotta fight a stranger, because you never know.
01:39:06.000I'm just, if I was to be fighting, I'm trying to throw hands poorly.
01:39:12.000But if somebody just kicked me in the face, I'm like, oh, I didn't know you were going to do that.
01:39:17.000This Donald Cerrone combination, god damn, that's beautiful.
01:39:52.000It felt kind of barbaric or archaic, but when you have money on somebody and they're beating the shit out of somebody else and you're winning, it's a different type of emotion.
01:40:07.000When Cerrone started fucking that dude up, I stood up like...
01:41:04.000When Glover started pressuring him, like when I score a fight, or rather commentate a fight, when I watch something like that, I'm like, okay, what can Glover do and what can Rumble do?
01:41:15.000We know Rumble has awesome stand-up skills.
01:41:17.000We know he had a college wrestling background.
01:44:18.000See, the thing about a guy like Rumble, though, is you could submit him once, but once he figures out what you did, and he remembers how much it sucked when you did that to him, can you do it again?
01:44:30.000And if you can't do it again, what if he can figure out how to keep it standing?
01:45:28.000You see certain people that have certain frames, like maybe they have really narrow shoulders and really small hands and a really small waist.
01:45:37.000They can't generate the same kind of power that a guy like Rumble Johnson can.
01:46:02.000And you look at that guy's frame, and he just bombs on dudes, knocks them unconscious, but you look at his frame when he's throwing punches, and you just go, okay, there's levels of athletes, right?
01:46:13.000There's levels of wrestlers, there's levels of strikers, and when you see certain dudes, the way they can move their body.
01:46:20.000Like, you ever watch Cirque du Soleil?
01:47:26.000That's a bad example, but there's a lot of guys that are his size that just don't have the kind of advantages that he has bone structure-wise.
01:48:09.000You know, I had a bet in on Mark Hunt, and you had told me, and I didn't know, I told you I'm a casual fan.
01:48:17.000I took Mark Hunt, but I didn't know anything about him, and then he walks out, and I'm like, oh shit, this motherfucker is built, he's built like me!
01:48:29.000So I had a cash bet in, so I did not go on in my book, my online book, this is before the fight started, I'm trying to bet on Brock Lesnar real quick.
01:48:53.000What Brock Lesnar did in taking that amount of time off and then beating a guy like Mark Hunt, that's so extraordinary.
01:49:01.000And he's probably never going to get the credit that he deserves because of the fact that one, he was a pro wrestler, and then two, he tested positive for this anti-estrogen blocker, whatever the fuck he took.
01:49:41.000If they just keep working out, and they stay healthy, and they stay fit, and they get into the cage healthy and fit with no injuries, which is like the primary...
01:49:52.000There's certain guys that you're like, you're in a world of shit.
01:49:57.000If you get a guy like Brock Lesnar into the ring with you and he's not hurt and he's in great shape and he has no injuries, you're in a world of shit.
01:50:06.000You're standing in front of a Goliath of a man.
01:50:09.000A guy who has to struggle to diet down 265 pounds.
01:51:14.000He signed with the UFC, and he just said, I'm going to do this the right way.
01:51:17.000And he went through a full, like, a long period of training, learning skills, and working under the tutelage of, like, one of the best guys in the world.
01:51:27.000Who the fuck knows what's going to happen?
01:51:46.000I mean, if the guy's willing to do that, that's an extraordinary amount of discipline that it takes to move to a place, change your life, live there for two years, just nothing but train.
01:54:09.000Yeah, people are chanting your name, but it's not like basketball, because you've been punching the face a lot, so you're in a little bit of pain.
01:57:02.000That is a really good point, because for someone to be that hypocritical, that you let a guy get punched in the head for 25 fucking minutes, but you won't let him smoke a vape pen, because what, you think he's cheating?
01:59:00.000But she, hey, she seems like a waitress with way bigger ambitions.
01:59:04.000She seems like she should be in LA or New York, actually, more than Vegas.
01:59:09.000Yeah, it's going to be hard because you're going to have to take a gamble at whether or not she's still working there, whether or not you know what day her shifts are on.
02:02:05.000I think what I'm trying to do, one of the things I'm trying to do by going to these places and disconnecting for a few days, is find out what I really think about things.
02:02:14.000Where it's just me and my thoughts and interacting with my friends.
02:02:19.000There's one of the good things about doing this show, it's called Meteor.
02:02:22.000This guy, Steve Rinella, who's the host of it, is like a really smart, really nice guy, really interesting guy.
02:02:28.000And, you know, I like hanging out with him and all of his crew and his friends for like all these days.
02:03:52.000Yeah, if my shit's dead and I'm just out for two hours, if I'm having long conversations and then I start realizing, oh shit, I'm getting kind of weird and intense with this person.
02:04:03.000I start asking, because I, you know, normally...
02:04:08.000I will, if I'm talking to somebody, I'll do the bullshit, regular questions that we do.
02:05:33.000Do I have any hiccups that I'm not paying attention to in the way I'm approaching life?
02:05:38.000So I wanted to talk to him about that.
02:05:40.000So I wanted to see what hypnotism really is, because I've been talking about something that I essentially don't have any real understanding of.
02:06:09.000When you get hypnotized, you are aware that this person is talking to you.
02:06:13.000It's not like you're in some space world.
02:06:16.000But the world that you're living in with your eyes closed in this state is a very different world.
02:06:22.000It's like if this person can command your attention, your focus for a certain amount of time, it lets all this other stuff sort of pass by.
02:06:30.000And when the person does it with no judgment, just trying to understand the way you're feeling and thinking, you allow yourself to slip in to this strange state of mind.
02:06:51.000I think there's a bunch of different states of consciousness leading from the dream world, which we all voluntarily go into every night when we go to sleep.
02:06:59.000We go to sleep, we conk out, and we have dreams.
02:07:06.000You have some wacky fucking idea that came into your head that didn't make any sense.
02:07:11.000And I think there's states of consciousness from being totally awake, fearing for your life because you're in the middle of an earthquake, to being like drifting in and out of dreams.
02:07:27.000You know, you're sitting in your car, maybe at a road stop, you got a six-hour drive, you're like, let me just pull over for an hour, and you're drifting in and out, you're not sure if you're asleep.
02:07:37.000Sometimes I'll close my eyes and just start seeing weird-ass colors and shapes and shit.
02:07:43.000Not even high, but I'll just close my eyes and then...
02:07:56.000Well, your brain can make all kinds of funky chemicals, man.
02:08:00.000And they don't necessarily exactly know why.
02:08:04.000It's not like there's a bunch of different things that you can do to make your brain produce certain chemicals.
02:08:09.000In a row, as far as maybe you can skip rope for 20 minutes and do 50 deep breathing exercises and you'll get into a psychedelic state.
02:08:20.000No one's exactly sure what the fuck it is that allows people to get to certain states and whether or not the way your brain works is the same as my brain.
02:08:37.000I hear people sing, and I hear a beautiful voice.
02:08:40.000We were walking by some people the other night in Vegas when we were on our way to go eat after the fights, and there was this guy and this girl, they were singing.
02:08:49.000They must have been a part of some team or something like that.
02:08:51.000They must have been some entertainers, because they were way too good.
02:08:54.000And they were singing, and they were singing with each other, and they were singing with each other in harmony in this hallway, and everybody was like, holy shit!
02:09:10.000But my brain is super sensitive to when sounds are off and different.
02:09:20.000Sometimes if you go to a karaoke spot, somebody doing karaoke, and if they pick the rock songs and the pop songs will sort of be the exact beats.
02:09:32.000The hip hop songs, the beats will have this, it's a different version of it, or it just, and it drives me crazy.
02:09:43.000It's certain things with music, like little shifts, In music that drive me crazy.
02:10:16.000That type of thing where I'm like, I have to leave here.
02:10:20.000Yesterday, my Uber driver from the airport, he was playing his own mixtape.
02:10:28.000He didn't say he was playing his own mixtape, but I could feel that he was playing his own mixtape because he played the same music for 40 minutes.
02:10:34.000The rapper's name began with K. His name began with K on the Uber, and it was bad.
02:10:56.000I'm going to just take how angry this is making me, because I don't want to give him the conversation, because he wants me to say, who's this?
02:15:51.000Ten minutes straight, just like that part.
02:15:54.000I still like the whole song, but it's a part of it.
02:15:57.000The drop on Father Stretch My Hands by Kanye West.
02:16:04.000The build-up to that, he sampled this gospel song with the same title, Father Stretch My Hands, and then it's the sample by Future, where you're like, well, if young Metro don't trust you, and it drops in.
02:16:54.000Well, I was like in a groove, you know?
02:16:56.000I don't remember what I came up with, but I remember feeling like, because this song, I knew what the lyrics were, it almost became like a sort of hypnosis.
02:21:53.000See, the idea of people working alongside each other, day in, day out, men and women all grouped together in these boxes is entirely unnatural.
02:22:01.000When people would be around each other in the wild, they would do it because they liked each other.
02:22:53.000It was just either she liked you because you were just strong and you brought food and killed it, or she didn't like you at all.
02:23:00.000You developed the first catapult to figure out how to launch a fucking rock towards the enemy.
02:23:05.000Or you were a small dude that she didn't pay attention to, and then out of nowhere, out of an act of jealousy and stepping up, you killed the big dude.
02:23:51.000Well, there was always, like, pool player groupies that would, uh, girls who were really good at pool, that would date dudes that were really good at pool.
02:24:51.000One of the crazy things about the Comedy Store is that we all get to hang out together where we never would really work together that much in real life.
02:24:59.000Like, if you go on the road, you take a dude with you to open.
02:25:01.000Everywhere we go, we take people with us to open or we have a local guy that we know we have come on.
02:26:21.000And so to see something that you've been to a bunch of times in this small space and then see it, you know, be in the same spot watching it live, it's cool to see something like that.
02:26:34.000To see that type of progression, it felt amazing, man.
02:27:38.000I enjoyed watching that and I was really happy for them.
02:27:41.000Yeah, no, I completely agree, all jokes aside.
02:27:45.000I mean, I think what they've managed to do by getting that show on the air is pretty monumental because this is a goddamn brutal show, right?
02:33:48.000The regular, but when you get into this, the freestyle, when you get into this, I can't fuck with this.
02:33:53.000Okay, for the people that are just listening, regular is you're throwing your arms over the head like you see in the pool.
02:33:58.000But when you're doing your shoulders with the goofy shit and swimming like that, the fly stroke, the breast stroke, get out of here with your fucking breast stroke.
02:35:02.000Let's pretend this is the only shitty way we know how to swim.
02:35:05.000Let's just fucking throw our arms in front of ourselves like we're parting the curtains, like those beads at the porno section of the video store before there were DVRs and DVDs and YOU PORN! Those days!
02:35:19.000If they're gonna have the fucking breaststroke, if they're gonna have this stroke, if they're gonna have this, then why not just have a fucking Olympic competition where you just run, but you high-kneeing the whole time?
02:35:32.000If you got the backstroke, why is there no backwards running in the Olympics?
02:35:36.000From now on, we should call that move the porn section.
02:35:40.000That is you parting the beads that are hanging.
02:35:43.000I bet when they fucking, when video games went under, or excuse me, videos, video rentals went under, I bet the bead industry dropped substantially.
02:35:53.000I bet a big part of their profits was beading off the porn sections.
02:38:54.000They're not the nicest people on earth.
02:38:55.000I think it's like the same way sometimes it's southern hospitality and then sometimes it's southern passive aggressiveness and they just talk horribly behind your back.
02:40:46.000I met some Canadian, when I was in Minneapolis, and they were like, I think they might have been from Saskatchewan, and they were like, you need to come, because it was some tourism convention or something.
02:44:30.000Because I get so weird and in my head sometimes where I can't, unless I'm a little drunk or a little on something else, I'm not able to enjoy myself high a lot, especially if I'm in a situation where I'm recognizable.
02:44:48.000If I'm high on weed and people recognize me, I get weirded the fuck out.
02:47:24.000And that's the good news about marijuana, like medical marijuana going nationwide, is that you can take a reasonable dose, like 10 milligrams, and it's therapeutic for your body.