The Joe Rogan Experience - August 30, 2016


Joe Rogan Experience #840 - Donald Cerrone


Episode Stats

Length

3 hours and 23 minutes

Words per Minute

206.04004

Word Count

42,015

Sentence Count

4,913

Misogynist Sentences

164

Hate Speech Sentences

110


Summary

In this episode of the Dive Life Podcast, we talk about how to survive a deep dive, how to stay alive, and what to do when you run out of oxygen. We also talk about the process of decompression and how to make sure you don t get the bends that happen when you come up from the bottom of the ocean. We hope you enjoy this episode and stay tuned for the next one! Don t forget to Like and Subscribe to stay up to date with what's going on in the world of Dive Life! Cheers! -The Dive Life Crew Enjoy & spread the word to your friends and family about this podcast! If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and we'll give you a shoutout and tell your friends about it! Thank you so much for being a part of this podcast and supporting Dive Life, it means the world to us! We cannot do this without you. -Your support is so appreciated and we will always appreciate you! Thanks, Cowboy, Mikael, Trav, and the crew at DIVE LAKE VEGAS! XOXO! CHEERS! P.S. We'll be looking out for you in the next episode next week with a new episode of DIVE LIVING LIFE with Cowboy and Mikael and the Crew at Lake Mead, AZ! CHEVERYTHING! ! -DIVE, CHEER! (and we'll be back with you in LAXOXO, CHOOTO CHOODO! -PODCAST! , CHOOLO! CHOORO, PODCAST, CHODO, JUICY, CHOCOLO, GOSY, GAYO, and SONGS, GOT AYO, DOGS, AND AYODO CHOO, COWBOY, DADDY'S, GOOGO, CRUISE, AND YA CHOOSY! and we LOVE YOURSELF, KAROSO, BABYO AND JAYOYO!! -YEAH! WE'S GAY, JAYE, JYO'O, AND POOO, YA'O'YOH, BAYO'E, WE'LL DAAAAAAY, AND MORE!


Transcript

00:00:01.000 I can't be wearing a headset.
00:00:02.000 No.
00:00:03.000 You're going to wear your hat.
00:00:04.000 It looks weird.
00:00:05.000 Well, it looks weird.
00:00:07.000 There's only one headset.
00:00:09.000 Are we live?
00:00:11.000 Live?
00:00:12.000 We're fucking live, man.
00:00:13.000 What's going on, brother?
00:00:14.000 Chilling.
00:00:14.000 Look at you.
00:00:15.000 Look at me.
00:00:16.000 Filling up tanks.
00:00:17.000 Budweiser.
00:00:17.000 Cheers.
00:00:18.000 We cannot have a podcast with Cowboy.
00:00:22.000 Without America here.
00:00:23.000 America.
00:00:24.000 America.
00:00:24.000 America.
00:00:25.000 Thank you.
00:00:25.000 Starting off a good one.
00:00:29.000 So, tell me about the tanks.
00:00:30.000 You sent me a picture today.
00:00:32.000 I had a little time, Mikael, didn't I? Yeah.
00:00:34.000 What are you doing?
00:00:35.000 I'm going diving to Catalina.
00:00:37.000 Holy shit.
00:00:38.000 Home of the sharks.
00:00:39.000 Home of the Makos, right?
00:00:40.000 The Mako, yeah.
00:00:41.000 I was watching a TV show the other day where people were fishing for them out there.
00:00:45.000 So we got filled up a couple doubles.
00:00:48.000 My buddy Rob from Always Sunny Philadelphia taking me this weekend camping.
00:00:52.000 So they're going diving, but they all dive singles.
00:00:54.000 So I like to go deeper, longer.
00:00:56.000 What singles?
00:00:57.000 What does that mean?
00:00:57.000 Like a single tank, an aluminum 80. Oh, single tank.
00:01:00.000 Single tank, yeah.
00:01:01.000 So me and my girl...
00:01:02.000 We're diving doubles, which everyone says doubles means double trouble, but whatever.
00:01:07.000 What does that mean?
00:01:08.000 Like, how deep can you go with a double?
00:01:09.000 You can go as deep until you run out of air, but we'll probably go in the 200 range, 220 to...
00:01:14.000 200 feet down.
00:01:16.000 200 feet down.
00:01:17.000 Boom!
00:01:18.000 That's one of those weird ones where when you come up, you've got to come up slow, right?
00:01:22.000 Or you get the bends.
00:01:23.000 Yeah, absolutely.
00:01:25.000 You get the bends, yeah.
00:01:28.000 It's decompressing, you know.
00:01:30.000 The process to diving, and I've been diving seriously, like a lot of rec diving and a lot of tech, you should say, diving over the last two years, man.
00:01:39.000 I ran into some guys in Las Vegas, Buddy Trav, and he...
00:01:43.000 Kind of schooled me on their way of diving.
00:01:46.000 I love it, man.
00:01:49.000 The reason I go to Las Vegas and dive Lake Mead all the time is because I dive with guys.
00:01:52.000 They dive 200-300 feet every day, every week.
00:01:55.000 Getting around the people that dive it regularly and know their shit is to teach me the way.
00:02:01.000 Thanks, Trav.
00:02:02.000 I appreciate you showing me the light, brother.
00:02:04.000 Now, when you come up, how do you know when you're going down 200 feet?
00:02:09.000 It's all an algorithm.
00:02:09.000 It's all in your dive computers.
00:02:12.000 So you plan, plan, plan, plan, plan, then you recheck.
00:02:14.000 And Lindsay, she does the same thing.
00:02:17.000 We check each other's work and make sure all our gases are mapped out for how long.
00:02:22.000 Let's just say we're going to go 150 feet for...
00:02:25.000 There's a cool ship down there we want to check out.
00:02:27.000 We want to be there for 35 minutes, right?
00:02:29.000 So I put the algorithm in these apps in our computer, or we write it all out, and it'll tell us exactly how long of a bottom time we can have, the stops that we have to make, and the gases that we have to switch to decompress the amount of nitrogen in our blood and make our way to the surface.
00:02:42.000 What's the science behind it?
00:02:43.000 Like, why does nitrogen get in your blood?
00:02:45.000 So, because from...
00:02:46.000 Earth's surface to the atmosphere is one atmosphere, right?
00:02:51.000 Every 33 feet is another atmosphere.
00:02:53.000 So every time we go down 33 feet, we add another atmosphere with that much more pressure.
00:02:57.000 So right now you're breathing 21%, oxygen 78%, a little bit of like argon and other shit in the natural air, right?
00:03:05.000 A lot of nitrogen too.
00:03:07.000 Yeah, so 78% of the air you're breathing right now is nitrogen.
00:03:11.000 Right.
00:03:11.000 21% is oxygen.
00:03:13.000 Most people don't know that.
00:03:13.000 They think that you're just breathing oxygen.
00:03:14.000 No, you're only breathing 21% oxygen.
00:03:16.000 But you off-gas it through your tissues because there's no pressure on you.
00:03:21.000 Right now you're taking a breath, and then you breathe out, and the nitrogen just off-gases.
00:03:24.000 Well, as soon as we start going onto the water, the amount of pressure holds that into our system.
00:03:30.000 We can't off-gas it, so it turns into a liquid and goes into our blood, which is what the bends is, is where the guys would be working, and then they just come up, because they didn't know.
00:03:40.000 No one knew until you know, right?
00:03:41.000 I mean, we didn't know there wasn't a moon god until all of a sudden we know now.
00:03:45.000 Right?
00:03:46.000 I know what you're saying.
00:03:52.000 Yeah, so you force the liquid back into a gas by coming up fast, which goes into your joints and causes the bends.
00:04:03.000 It makes you bend over and hurt your back.
00:04:05.000 That's what they call it, the bend, because the guys are like, oh, fuck, I'm fucked up, right?
00:04:09.000 And that shit can kill you, right?
00:04:11.000 Well, yeah, well, you can aneurysm in your brain, blood clot, you know, all kinds of crazy, kill you instantly.
00:04:17.000 Whoa!
00:04:18.000 So, 150 feet, all of a sudden, 25 minutes is up.
00:04:23.000 Now we're going to start our ascent.
00:04:25.000 And our computer says, all right, at 70 feet, we've got to do a minute.
00:04:28.000 At 60 feet, we've got to do two minutes.
00:04:29.000 We're going to switch gases.
00:04:31.000 Now we're going to switch to 50% oxygen.
00:04:33.000 So increase the amount of oxygen to which decreases the amount of nitrogen that we're breathing.
00:04:37.000 So we're going to speed the off-gassing process because we're coming up.
00:04:40.000 So the pressure is coming off as our body is able to off-gas it.
00:04:44.000 So you just have to do like stages and it's all through an algorithm and the Navy dive system.
00:04:50.000 Been through years, hundreds of millions of dives, you know, figuring out the timetables of the correct amount of time.
00:04:56.000 You have to be at each depth to off-gas the amount of nitrogen in your body is built up.
00:05:00.000 And then when you go deeper than that, you start adding in a tri-mix.
00:05:03.000 We add helium in.
00:05:04.000 Helium?
00:05:05.000 Helium, yes.
00:05:06.000 We add helium into the mix.
00:05:07.000 And yeah, man, it's so fun.
00:05:09.000 But the fear of, you know, could I die?
00:05:11.000 Yeah, hell yeah.
00:05:11.000 That's why I love it.
00:05:13.000 Fucking crazy.
00:05:14.000 Fucking love it.
00:05:15.000 And we were talking earlier about sharks.
00:05:18.000 I swim after the sharks.
00:05:19.000 Like, I want to get them on the GoPro.
00:05:21.000 They're, like, swimming away from me.
00:05:22.000 Sharks don't...
00:05:22.000 They don't just eat divers.
00:05:24.000 They don't just swim along a fucking great white gum and attack you.
00:05:26.000 They're, like, scared of you, man.
00:05:27.000 You're, like, a big black...
00:05:30.000 Breathing out fucking bubbles and shiny, you know?
00:05:32.000 So they want nothing to do with you, and I'm always trying to chase them down.
00:05:35.000 So most of the shark attacks are like surfers, right?
00:05:38.000 Because they think it's a seal.
00:05:39.000 Yeah, seal up top.
00:05:40.000 And where would you rather...
00:05:41.000 We were just watching before you got here some footage of the shark attacks on YouTube.
00:05:46.000 Where would you rather be?
00:05:47.000 I'd rather fight the fucking shark under the water.
00:05:49.000 Yeah, I'd rather be under.
00:05:50.000 Under instead of on top.
00:05:52.000 Is this the video I posted yesterday?
00:05:54.000 Yeah, of the shark gnawing on the cage.
00:05:55.000 Fuck this.
00:05:56.000 Right?
00:05:57.000 Fuck everything about this.
00:05:59.000 This is insane.
00:06:00.000 This great white shark is trying to get these people.
00:06:02.000 He's biting this cage, trying to get what's inside.
00:06:04.000 So what do you do?
00:06:05.000 You just grab his dorsal fin and go for a ride, baby.
00:06:06.000 He can't bite you behind him.
00:06:08.000 Rides back.
00:06:09.000 Mata liao.
00:06:11.000 Have you seen a great white underwater?
00:06:13.000 I never have, no.
00:06:14.000 I've never, I haven't been down, you know, in the waters where they're at, you know, Australia and stuff like that.
00:06:18.000 So, no, I never, I've never seen a great white.
00:06:20.000 I've seen plenty of hammerheads and, you know, Mako and, but never like a giant great white.
00:06:24.000 Hammerheads are so bizarre.
00:06:25.000 They look like an avatar creature.
00:06:27.000 They don't even look real.
00:06:28.000 Like, why are their eyeballs way out there like that?
00:06:29.000 I feel like I've been with a couple of hammerhead women, you know?
00:06:34.000 Like, what are them titties doing, honey?
00:06:36.000 Get them, pick them up.
00:06:38.000 Pick them up.
00:06:40.000 That's when a girl with an A cup tries to go straight D right away.
00:06:43.000 It can't be done.
00:06:44.000 And they lay next to her on the bed.
00:06:45.000 It's defying science.
00:06:46.000 You've got an evil Knievel Canyon in between your titties.
00:06:49.000 That's it.
00:06:49.000 So I love diving.
00:06:51.000 I've got a great dive partner, my girl Lindsay.
00:06:54.000 And that's the biggest thing, having the companionship and trust of someone with your life, right?
00:06:59.000 Right.
00:07:00.000 Yeah.
00:07:01.000 Carrying all the tanks.
00:07:02.000 She'll be diving.
00:07:03.000 She'll have a pair of doubles on her back and two tanks in her arms.
00:07:07.000 She'll have four tanks.
00:07:08.000 Under the water.
00:07:09.000 I heard spear fishing is the shit.
00:07:11.000 I love it, yeah.
00:07:12.000 You do that?
00:07:12.000 Yeah, sure.
00:07:13.000 Only if I'm going to eat it.
00:07:14.000 I'm just kill to kill, but yeah.
00:07:15.000 Right.
00:07:16.000 So, yeah, absolutely.
00:07:17.000 Because it's like hunting, but fishing.
00:07:20.000 Yeah, it's a lot easier than you think.
00:07:23.000 They don't know what the fuck's going on.
00:07:24.000 They have no idea what's going on.
00:07:25.000 Yeah, they don't know about spears.
00:07:26.000 They don't even know what you are.
00:07:26.000 You're like, what the fuck?
00:07:27.000 Oh, fucking got him.
00:07:28.000 So, you know, so...
00:07:31.000 No, is it attached to a rope?
00:07:33.000 Yeah, it's attached to like a fishing line.
00:07:35.000 You can shoot it.
00:07:36.000 It depends if you're using a gun or they have like slings that go in your arm and you can shoot them like a little...
00:07:40.000 Like Spider-Man?
00:07:41.000 Yeah, not so much.
00:07:42.000 Just a little like a slingshot type thing you put on your wrist and let go of it.
00:07:46.000 Ah, wow.
00:07:47.000 But the spirit guns will go far and they have like a little reel you can reel it in on.
00:07:50.000 Like how far?
00:07:53.000 50 feet?
00:07:54.000 Yeah.
00:07:54.000 100 feet?
00:07:55.000 Yeah, sure.
00:07:55.000 And they slow down considerably, though, right?
00:07:57.000 Oh, of course.
00:07:57.000 After the first few feet?
00:07:58.000 Yeah.
00:07:59.000 Wow.
00:07:59.000 They'll be right on it.
00:08:00.000 And your depth perception is so different underwater, so you've got to aim above them.
00:08:05.000 It's weird.
00:08:06.000 Right, right.
00:08:06.000 The refraction.
00:08:07.000 Yeah, that's the same when you're shooting down.
00:08:10.000 Yeah, bow hunting.
00:08:10.000 Yeah, they bow fish in the water.
00:08:12.000 You've got to aim six inches under where you think it's going to be.
00:08:15.000 Exactly.
00:08:15.000 Bizarre.
00:08:16.000 Now, when you're diving, how long have you been doing this, first of all?
00:08:20.000 Well, I got certified in high school.
00:08:21.000 High school?
00:08:22.000 Yeah.
00:08:23.000 Damn, so you've been doing this for a long time.
00:08:24.000 Yeah, but that was just like going 30, 40 feet, recreational diving, you know, going to see some stupid, I shouldn't say stupid, but that's like the recreation thing to do is go see a reef, but I think one reef looks like every reef.
00:08:38.000 Right.
00:08:38.000 I don't know.
00:08:39.000 So I kind of got over that.
00:08:40.000 Like I said, I met with these guys and doing the shit that only 5% of the world do.
00:08:44.000 You know, my goal is to go 500 feet.
00:08:46.000 So I've been just shy of 300. And yeah, there's just a lot of planning and crazy shit that goes involved.
00:08:52.000 I mean, you're dead pretty much.
00:08:54.000 Anything goes wrong.
00:08:55.000 How long does it take you to get up from 300?
00:08:58.000 From 300, it's about a 50-minute deco time back up to the surface.
00:09:03.000 5-0?
00:09:04.000 Yeah, so it's about a three-hour dive completely.
00:09:07.000 Holy shit.
00:09:08.000 Now, if something goes wrong, like if your cord gets cut when you're down there...
00:09:12.000 There's no cord, but...
00:09:13.000 Well, if you're bleeding oxygen...
00:09:15.000 Right, you shut one off and go to your...
00:09:16.000 So you always carry enough gas.
00:09:17.000 No one's ever died because you have too much gas, right?
00:09:19.000 Oh, okay.
00:09:20.000 So you carry it with you.
00:09:21.000 So a lot of the mixtures we bring with us, like my bat gas will just be regular, either tri-mixed gas or regular air, and then I'll have a 36% oxygen, which is to about 100 feet.
00:09:32.000 So if anything were to go around my bat gas, I could haul ass to 100 feet and then start my deco, you know, and really, there's like protocol and all kinds of different, plus, I'm diving with a buddy, which would be you.
00:09:42.000 And you have all the gas on you, too.
00:09:43.000 So you would be, you know, arms like the wave, some shit went down.
00:09:46.000 Oh, so I could give you my gas?
00:09:48.000 Yeah.
00:09:48.000 Oh, wow.
00:09:49.000 Give you a regulator intake.
00:09:50.000 You have one that hangs on your neck and one that you're using, right?
00:09:53.000 So you'd give me yours and put yours in and we'd figure it out.
00:09:56.000 Oh, okay.
00:09:56.000 But if you were nowhere to be found, like if I was off screwing off and doing something I shouldn't be, which I'm fucking 99% doing...
00:10:03.000 Then I gotta rely on myself.
00:10:06.000 Whoa.
00:10:07.000 It's fucking crazy.
00:10:08.000 But you can't talk.
00:10:09.000 Can't talk.
00:10:09.000 You have to say...
00:10:10.000 So me and Lindsey were in Florida, diving the Spiegel Grove, which is a giant, like, huge ship in the Key West.
00:10:21.000 And...
00:10:21.000 What kind of ship is it?
00:10:23.000 I don't know if the Spiegel Grove is the aircraft carrier or if that's the Vandy.
00:10:26.000 I'm getting confused.
00:10:27.000 But one's like a giant aircraft carrier and one's like a destroyer.
00:10:31.000 Oh, wow.
00:10:32.000 Shoot, 500 feet.
00:10:33.000 Holy shit.
00:10:35.000 They're natural reefs, so the government sunk them, cut a bunch of holes in them for idiots like me to go swim through them.
00:10:39.000 Oh, they sunk them on purpose.
00:10:40.000 Oh, yeah.
00:10:50.000 Wow.
00:10:52.000 Wow.
00:10:58.000 You have to pay to go there?
00:10:59.000 No, you just pay for the gas.
00:11:00.000 But the thriving boat captain that needs to feed his family charges you $180 to take you out with the GPS and tell you good luck.
00:11:09.000 Wow.
00:11:10.000 So, me and Lindsay are out there.
00:11:12.000 Well, of course, I'm seeing cool shit because I'm down in the engine room fucking doing whatever I want.
00:11:16.000 She gets tangled up.
00:11:19.000 And has like a freak out episode and then I come back like what the fuck you like like gave her like where you been and she's like motherfucker like all mad at me was all caught up in the things I had a when we got up whoa back up to the surface I got my ass tore up I was like,
00:11:35.000 well, you made it.
00:11:35.000 You're good.
00:11:36.000 All the practice we did.
00:11:38.000 Walk it off.
00:11:38.000 Walk it off.
00:11:39.000 Shit.
00:11:40.000 Have you ever gone, like, on treasure hunting dives?
00:11:43.000 No.
00:11:44.000 I mean, so, first of all, I need to live near the ocean, which I don't.
00:11:48.000 And second, I need to know someone who has a boat.
00:11:50.000 And, you know, you hear stories, like, all these boat captains know of all the good fishing.
00:11:55.000 Because where the good fishing is, usually there's a structure down there, right?
00:11:58.000 So that's how you, like, run it.
00:11:59.000 You find, like, a boat captain and know, like, a...
00:12:27.000 Could you imagine?
00:12:28.000 Yeah, and they were trying to figure out who gets the gold and who claims Yeah, me.
00:12:32.000 That's who it'd be.
00:12:33.000 But it'd be fucking go time.
00:12:37.000 But you have to be, like, really careful about, like, giving out the location because then other treasure hunters would find it.
00:12:44.000 Like, there's a big business in that shit.
00:12:45.000 Well, so, like, let's just say me and you go treasure hunting and the captain takes the spot.
00:12:49.000 We find it.
00:12:49.000 We jump down.
00:12:50.000 All of a sudden, we find all this gold and this treasure.
00:12:52.000 Right.
00:12:52.000 We only have enough gas for, who knows, 20 minutes down there?
00:12:56.000 Right.
00:12:56.000 So we gotta come back up.
00:12:57.000 We couldn't even bring the fucking gold this trip if we wanted to.
00:13:00.000 Right.
00:13:00.000 So now we're back in the boat.
00:13:01.000 You know, I know, the boat captain knows who else is with us.
00:13:03.000 So now we gotta figure out who do we tell.
00:13:05.000 Right.
00:13:05.000 And do we tell this boat captain, oh, you're coming with us for the next, until we figure this shit out, because I'm not gonna let you go, tell whoever you, yeah, so.
00:13:12.000 Yeah, man, I think it's really, really tricky.
00:13:14.000 You have to kill the captain.
00:13:15.000 You would have to.
00:13:16.000 You'd have to.
00:13:16.000 Do you know how to use a GPS? Yeah, I mean, I think nowadays you just press the button, right?
00:13:20.000 Drop a pin, yeah.
00:13:21.000 Yeah, you'd have to drop a pin, and then you'd have to kill that guy and drop him where the pin is.
00:13:26.000 Or don't kill him.
00:13:27.000 You gotta cut him in.
00:13:28.000 He's gotta get a third.
00:13:29.000 Something.
00:13:30.000 Yeah.
00:13:31.000 Or it depends on...
00:13:32.000 Yeah, how much money you're talking about.
00:13:34.000 But then is it fair that he gets a third for...
00:13:35.000 Oh, you're talking probably millions of dollars.
00:13:37.000 Yeah, but if you don't give him a third, he's gonna fuck you.
00:13:39.000 He's gonna rat.
00:13:39.000 He's gonna fuck you.
00:13:40.000 Yeah, you have to give him a third.
00:13:41.000 Because you gotta think, if he didn't take you there, you'd have never got it.
00:13:45.000 And it's a shitload of money.
00:13:46.000 It's free.
00:13:47.000 So if he says half, then what do you do?
00:13:50.000 Fuck you.
00:13:51.000 Then you kick his ass.
00:13:53.000 Like, you don't let him get half.
00:13:54.000 You gotta be generous, but if he tries to fuck you on your generosity, that's when you kill him.
00:13:58.000 Oh, man.
00:13:59.000 How many people have probably been killed over shipwrecks and treasure?
00:14:03.000 Pirates?
00:14:04.000 Pirate shit?
00:14:04.000 Yeah, that goes back.
00:14:05.000 A lot.
00:14:06.000 Yeah.
00:14:06.000 Fuck.
00:14:06.000 Think about those shitty ass wooden boats.
00:14:08.000 How many of those fucking things must have crashed?
00:14:10.000 Plus those greedy bitches, they loaded them up with gold, tried to make it across the ocean.
00:14:14.000 Yeah, plus if I was a pirate, I'd be known when you're loading yours up and I'd just go fucking take yours over and take all...
00:14:20.000 So now I got all my shit plus all your shit.
00:14:22.000 Right.
00:14:23.000 Plus, we found another one on the way, so now I'm tripled up.
00:14:25.000 Big, heavy boat.
00:14:26.000 Well, this documentary that I was watching, this guy who was doing it, it was a professional treasure hunter.
00:14:31.000 That's what he does.
00:14:32.000 And, you know, he has to get investors involved because it costs hundreds of thousands of dollars to make millions of dollars treasure hunting, and then you've got to be able to find them.
00:14:41.000 A lot of them are apparently around Florida.
00:14:43.000 Sure well that's so like Key West there's so many like wrecked ships because that was like the port you know that was the so yeah I could only I mean I went to it they have like a wrecked ship museum and I went there and talked to all the guys in there and they were saying that man there's thousands and thousands of boats that are all because that's the port where they would do all the trading thousands wow it's a whole nother fucking world down there man it really is just like the Little Mermaid it's a whole new world A whole new world!
00:15:13.000 Look, I have kids, man.
00:15:15.000 I've heard that fucking song.
00:15:15.000 Oh yeah, we all have.
00:15:16.000 We were just at the Seattle Aquarium, and I was looking at these octopuses.
00:15:20.000 They had this octopus exhibit, and they were doing this thing on octopuses where this lady was explaining they have three hearts.
00:15:26.000 It's insane.
00:15:27.000 And to see them move underwater is fucking...
00:15:30.000 If you're a screwdriver, and you haven't done a night dive because it's a whole other world at night, Like the, what are the, when you move, the luminescence, it's crazy.
00:15:40.000 You can move underwater and everything glows.
00:15:42.000 The octopus, how fast they change colors and move.
00:15:44.000 So when you move underwater, you glow?
00:15:46.000 Oh yeah.
00:15:46.000 If you shut all your lights off and you just like move your arms and draw, you could write Joe.
00:15:51.000 And you just spell it out in the...
00:15:53.000 So cool.
00:15:54.000 Why is that?
00:15:54.000 Why can you see it?
00:15:55.000 What is it?
00:15:56.000 I think the shrimp...
00:15:58.000 Phytoplankton.
00:15:59.000 I've seen this in Puerto Rico.
00:16:01.000 Oh!
00:16:02.000 Here you go.
00:16:02.000 Look at this.
00:16:03.000 Look at this.
00:16:04.000 That's insane.
00:16:06.000 I mean, that might be a little bit digitally fixed, but...
00:16:10.000 It's fucking cool.
00:16:12.000 Wow.
00:16:12.000 So what area of the world is this stuff in?
00:16:14.000 Well, we do it in Cozumel whenever I go down to Mexico.
00:16:17.000 So I'm sure it's...
00:16:18.000 Yeah, they have it in Puerto Rico.
00:16:19.000 That's right.
00:16:19.000 I've seen it.
00:16:20.000 It's unbelievable.
00:16:20.000 So you go down there, shut your lights up, and you can just play in the water and kick up and make...
00:16:24.000 They just glow.
00:16:25.000 Write your name.
00:16:26.000 Wow.
00:16:27.000 That's like space shit.
00:16:28.000 It is space shit.
00:16:29.000 And then you have these crazy octopuses that can change colors.
00:16:32.000 I don't even know how many different colors they can change, but you just see them fucking crawling all across the ground.
00:16:36.000 It's insane.
00:16:36.000 Cool.
00:16:37.000 Wow.
00:16:38.000 Wow.
00:16:39.000 That is so bizarre.
00:16:40.000 And these thousands of ships, one day they're going to figure out technology to go and find those things.
00:16:46.000 They're going to be able to locate all of them.
00:16:48.000 But right now, what percentage?
00:16:50.000 Well, they're wooden, so they're rotting away.
00:16:52.000 I mean, there's not much left of them, right?
00:16:55.000 The metal ships are the only thing.
00:16:58.000 I've done one wooden and it was shit.
00:17:01.000 It was like all falling apart, you know?
00:17:02.000 Yeah, they don't find much, but what's left is like the pottery and the gold and the coins and things along those lines.
00:17:10.000 They find some certain metal things.
00:17:12.000 But like swords, swords rot away.
00:17:14.000 Or not to mention dead bodies.
00:17:15.000 Yeah.
00:17:16.000 I mean, if you're finding a ship that no one's ever seen...
00:17:19.000 Dr. Cook, right?
00:17:21.000 Yeah, you find some fucking dead body type shit.
00:17:23.000 Some haunted shit.
00:17:24.000 Yeah, talk about putting your heartbeat through the roof, opening a hatch and just seeing a skeleton head fall on your lap.
00:17:30.000 Did you ever see that boat that they found that was adrift and there was a dude who had turned into, essentially he had turned into a mummy.
00:17:37.000 He had been mummified by the sea air and dried out, slumped over the table.
00:17:42.000 Like he had a table in the galley and he slumped over the table and he's dead.
00:17:46.000 There he is.
00:17:47.000 That's how they found that, dude.
00:17:48.000 Well, because I feel like that's the same movement anyone's gonna do when you're on your last leg, when you're in a boat.
00:17:54.000 That's like, I'm fuckin' sick, and that's the move you're gonna do.
00:17:58.000 It says, Mummy found on boat missing since 2009. Fuck.
00:18:02.000 And there he is.
00:18:03.000 One leg out.
00:18:04.000 One leg out posted.
00:18:05.000 He's like, I guess this is it.
00:18:07.000 This is it.
00:18:08.000 Damn.
00:18:09.000 I wonder if another person would've made it.
00:18:12.000 I wonder if he was a pussy.
00:18:15.000 I wonder if he gave out.
00:18:16.000 He got tired of fishing.
00:18:17.000 I can't do it.
00:18:19.000 It's the fresh water that would get you.
00:18:21.000 Yeah.
00:18:22.000 I'm sure you could eat, catch fish.
00:18:24.000 It would be the water that would get you.
00:18:26.000 How long can you drink your piss?
00:18:28.000 I personally know I could go a week without water from my cuts to 155, so I know I could do a week.
00:18:34.000 Yeah.
00:18:35.000 And that'd be...
00:18:36.000 After that, I'm on my deathbed.
00:18:38.000 Yeah, dude, let's talk about that.
00:18:39.000 Don't do that anymore.
00:18:40.000 Don't do that anymore, man.
00:18:42.000 I know you keep talking about, like, fighting Eddie Alvarez because you already beat him and now he's the champ, but god damn you're looking good at 170. Yeah, but so...
00:18:49.000 You're saying I didn't look good at 55. You looked sensational at 55. I went 9 for 10. But at 170, you're a fucking world beater, man.
00:18:57.000 It's not just that you look good.
00:18:59.000 It's just the way you look.
00:19:01.000 It's like you hit a whole new level.
00:19:03.000 And I always wonder, like, is it because obviously you keep training, obviously you keep getting better, obviously you work hard.
00:19:09.000 All those things, learning from experience, all those things are a factor.
00:19:13.000 But on top of that, there's also the factor of you not having to cut that fucking weight.
00:19:19.000 Man.
00:19:20.000 So, this last fight...
00:19:23.000 Against Rick Story.
00:19:24.000 Against Rick Story.
00:19:25.000 Well, it looked like you were in the fucking Matrix.
00:19:27.000 That was some Anderson Silva shit.
00:19:28.000 I ate five guys three nights that we were in Vegas.
00:19:32.000 Five guys burgers?
00:19:33.000 Hamburgers.
00:19:34.000 Good man.
00:19:34.000 Double doubles.
00:19:35.000 I'm a big fan of those.
00:19:36.000 So am I. Do you get jalapenos on those?
00:19:38.000 Of course.
00:19:38.000 Yeah, you get the jalapeno.
00:19:40.000 Get the seasoned fries?
00:19:42.000 Of course.
00:19:44.000 See?
00:19:45.000 You're all healthy.
00:19:45.000 My trainers are happy.
00:19:46.000 I think I had six pounds to cut.
00:19:48.000 It was easy.
00:19:49.000 No-brainer.
00:19:50.000 When I saw you before the fight before that, you were a 176 when you were at the Comedy Store.
00:19:55.000 Yeah.
00:19:56.000 That's nothing.
00:19:57.000 Nothing.
00:19:57.000 Yeah.
00:19:58.000 Look how good you look at this weight.
00:20:00.000 I feel good.
00:20:01.000 For damn sure.
00:20:02.000 But isn't that a factor?
00:20:03.000 I mean, look how fast you are.
00:20:04.000 Like the Cote fight.
00:20:06.000 Dude, you were on fire.
00:20:07.000 You're on fire at that weight.
00:20:10.000 I don't know.
00:20:11.000 What's the thought process?
00:20:12.000 I don't have one.
00:20:12.000 You can do 155, right?
00:20:14.000 You can do it.
00:20:14.000 You have done it.
00:20:15.000 I wish it was like 60 or 65. If it was 65 weight class, that'd be Cowboys weight class.
00:20:20.000 But it's just that last five pounds is death for me.
00:20:23.000 It's fucking brutal, you know?
00:20:24.000 From 60 to 55, I just feel like I got nothing left, man.
00:20:27.000 I don't know if that carries over.
00:20:28.000 Like, I want to ask...
00:20:30.000 You see, Pettis looked a little tired, didn't he, in his last fight?
00:20:33.000 I don't know if the 45 cut, if that has something to do with it.
00:20:36.000 Oh, for sure.
00:20:36.000 If it takes a little bit of your gas tank a little bit.
00:20:39.000 100%.
00:20:39.000 100%.
00:20:40.000 It has to.
00:20:41.000 It has to.
00:20:42.000 I feel great out there.
00:20:43.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:20:44.000 But I fucking love fighting, man.
00:20:45.000 It's my favorite thing in the whole world to do.
00:20:47.000 Like, in the whole world.
00:20:49.000 Like, I wish a motherfucker when I leave here pulls up in the parking lot and tries to give him shit.
00:20:53.000 Like, that to me is like, you know?
00:20:55.000 And this is the craziest thing to me.
00:20:57.000 People tell me, like, I post pictures of me flipping people off, right?
00:21:01.000 So they're like, cowboy, you're a fucking role model.
00:21:03.000 How dare you?
00:21:04.000 Like, no, I'm not.
00:21:05.000 I'm a bar junkie that fights all the time, and it's now on TV, and you think it's cool, so I'm your favorite fire, you know?
00:21:12.000 But had you not been in the UFC, I'd be the asshole trying to take your girlfriend and fight you at the bar, just so you know.
00:21:18.000 That's who I would be.
00:21:19.000 Just so you know!
00:21:21.000 Just so you know.
00:21:23.000 You say that, but you're a very nice guy.
00:21:26.000 I've seen you out there in public, and part of it is because you're dealing with people that are fans, and they come up to you, they're nice.
00:21:30.000 I'm just saying I love fighting, man.
00:21:33.000 Well, you love it also because you're really good at it.
00:21:35.000 I mean, if you kept getting your ass kicked, you'd be like, man, I've got to find some other shit to do in my life.
00:21:39.000 I don't know, man.
00:21:39.000 When I was in high school and figuring out who I was, I got my ass kicked a lot.
00:21:44.000 Because I was that guy.
00:21:46.000 It didn't ever take much for me to jump, you know?
00:21:49.000 And I'd strike, and then I'd get my fucking ass mopped by three dudes, two dudes, one didn't matter.
00:21:54.000 I'd just get beat up.
00:21:55.000 And that's what got you into MMA? Yeah.
00:21:58.000 No, I started off kickboxing.
00:21:59.000 A buddy of mine just told me, you think you're tough, come try this kickboxing shit.
00:22:02.000 And I went down and fell in love with it.
00:22:04.000 Where'd you train?
00:22:05.000 Where's the first place you trained?
00:22:08.000 Commerce City Rec Center in Commerce City, Denver.
00:22:12.000 It was this rec center that offered taekwondo Tuesdays and Thursday nights.
00:22:17.000 And I'd go in there and we'd spar.
00:22:19.000 And sparring is all I did.
00:22:21.000 That's what I used to do.
00:22:22.000 I thought that was getting ready for a fight would just be fucking throwing down.
00:22:26.000 Now I don't spar at all, and all I do is drill, because drilling is the most important thing you do, right?
00:22:32.000 But that's all I do is spar.
00:22:34.000 So you don't spar at all, man?
00:22:35.000 No, hell no.
00:22:36.000 That's really interesting.
00:22:37.000 No, and I tell my training partners and everyone that try to get me to spar, but now they're okay with me just drilling.
00:22:43.000 But I feel like...
00:22:45.000 The little guy at the Walmart check-in clicking.
00:22:47.000 Every time you take a hit in your head, he pushes the button.
00:22:49.000 How many people go into Walmart before it's full?
00:22:51.000 I don't know.
00:22:52.000 Yeah.
00:22:52.000 I have no idea.
00:22:53.000 How many more do I got?
00:22:54.000 I think that's a very good point.
00:22:56.000 How many epic fucking brawls do me and Leonard Garcia have in the training room?
00:23:00.000 I don't know!
00:23:01.000 Right.
00:23:02.000 So, like, I'll get in there and move around with Andre and move around with all the heavyweights.
00:23:09.000 Like, light.
00:23:10.000 MMA sparring, you know?
00:23:11.000 Heavy takedowns and grappling.
00:23:12.000 Real light striking, you know?
00:23:14.000 But the days of putting the big gloves on and throwing down, hell no.
00:23:17.000 I just did it with Joe Schilling the other day, so I can't really say hell no.
00:23:19.000 But him and I had a good tempo and it wasn't anything crazy, you know?
00:23:22.000 I watched videos of you guys sparring.
00:23:24.000 It seemed very controlled.
00:23:25.000 Very controlled.
00:23:26.000 So that, if I'm sparring with someone that's very controlled and doesn't try and kill me, cool.
00:23:31.000 But Man, going in with some of those guys that are trying to make a name at the gym just want to crank you.
00:23:36.000 Then I gotta fuck them up.
00:23:37.000 You know what I mean?
00:23:37.000 Now we're fighting.
00:23:38.000 Yeah.
00:23:39.000 Yeah.
00:23:41.000 That's a funny contradiction.
00:23:42.000 It's like, I love to fight, but I don't want to spar.
00:23:45.000 Yeah.
00:23:46.000 I love to fight, but I don't want to get hit anymore.
00:23:48.000 Is there any way we could do that?
00:23:49.000 These beers say America on them.
00:23:50.000 They say America.
00:23:51.000 That's the new thing.
00:23:53.000 Is this the new thing that Budweiser does?
00:23:54.000 Yeah.
00:23:56.000 America.
00:23:57.000 That's interesting.
00:23:58.000 How do you not buy those if you see those at the store?
00:24:00.000 I don't know, and I don't know how people...
00:24:01.000 It's a good move.
00:24:02.000 What if Coors comes along and goes, America, fuck yeah.
00:24:04.000 We don't even talk about Coors.
00:24:05.000 We talk about ice-cold, refreshing Budweiser.
00:24:07.000 That's what we do.
00:24:08.000 Oh, that's it?
00:24:08.000 That's what we talk about.
00:24:09.000 Oh, just because they're your sponsor?
00:24:09.000 Yeah.
00:24:10.000 Like Onnit.
00:24:11.000 We don't talk about Muscle Farm products.
00:24:12.000 We just talk about...
00:24:12.000 We take Onnit.
00:24:13.000 We don't talk about Muscle Farm products.
00:24:14.000 I don't give a fuck.
00:24:17.000 I'm the least competitive, competitive guy ever.
00:24:19.000 I hear it.
00:24:20.000 I hear it.
00:24:21.000 I'm a supporter.
00:24:22.000 So yeah, I love fighting, man.
00:24:24.000 I mean, to my soul.
00:24:25.000 I like the fact that you don't spar.
00:24:26.000 I think that's very wise.
00:24:27.000 Now, when you're doing drills, explain to me how you're doing them.
00:24:31.000 Okay.
00:24:31.000 Are you setting everything up from a striking standpoint where you work in combinations and then counters those combinations and then possibilities of all the different things that could happen?
00:24:43.000 Yes, I'm working with Brandon Gibson now, you know, he's a fucking great tacticianer, man.
00:24:46.000 Big fan of that guy.
00:24:47.000 Yeah, he breaks the...
00:24:48.000 So, I don't ever watch tape, and people think that's so crazy, but I don't...
00:24:51.000 I just don't, but they do.
00:24:53.000 So, my coaches do.
00:24:54.000 So, he'll come, and he'll be like, we're working this because I think this is what Story's gonna do, you know?
00:24:58.000 We knew he was gonna come with big overhands and the knees to the body were gonna be there.
00:25:02.000 So, everything we drill is, you know, when he does this, just make it reactionary, you know?
00:25:06.000 And...
00:25:07.000 I feel like that's all good and great, but the good thing is I know how to fucking fight, like, deep down in my soul.
00:25:13.000 So if everything, all that doesn't work, I can just fucking bite down and give her.
00:25:17.000 Yeah, well, you know, Jeremy Stephens had a very similar sentiment.
00:25:20.000 He said, I already know how to fight.
00:25:22.000 Yeah.
00:25:22.000 Yeah, he goes, it's all about just getting prepared, working on my cardio, working on my fitness, working on my drills and my techniques.
00:25:29.000 Yeah.
00:25:32.000 I don't ever take days off.
00:25:33.000 Today, of course, I'm drinking beer with you, but for the most part, I train probably five days a week.
00:25:38.000 And a lot of people think that all I do is fuck off.
00:25:39.000 He just drinks beer and parties.
00:25:41.000 No, I just don't post pictures of me training because I fucking hate that.
00:25:44.000 I hate...
00:25:45.000 I see everyone else's photos.
00:25:46.000 Them in the gym.
00:25:48.000 Six posts a day of them working.
00:25:49.000 No one gives a fuck.
00:25:50.000 You swim, you strength conditioning, you...
00:25:52.000 Whatever.
00:25:53.000 So I just do cool shit and throw that on Instagram, you know?
00:25:56.000 But...
00:25:57.000 I train all the time.
00:25:58.000 It's like my job.
00:26:00.000 People always think I'm out there fucking off, but I take this very serious and I train hard.
00:26:04.000 There's no way you could be as good as you are without...
00:26:06.000 Yeah, I mean, I have a gym in my backyard.
00:26:08.000 So some days I'll go play at the lake all day, but we come home and then we train and my coach is like, fuck, now it's 2 a.m.
00:26:12.000 and we have to train.
00:26:14.000 I love it.
00:26:16.000 When did you make the decision to stop sparring?
00:26:19.000 Probably four fights ago.
00:26:22.000 Four fights ago?
00:26:22.000 Yeah.
00:26:23.000 After which fight?
00:26:24.000 After I got my ass whipped by Alvarez, or by...
00:26:27.000 Dos Anjos?
00:26:28.000 Dos Anjos.
00:26:29.000 Yeah, I didn't spar that camp much at all, but I don't know.
00:26:35.000 I talked to Aubrey, and you, and that's how I got hooked up with Onnit, man.
00:26:39.000 I started thinking something was fucked up with my brain.
00:26:43.000 So I start brushing my teeth one morning, and I fall over and I hit the wall.
00:26:46.000 Like, I literally fell over and hit my shoulder on my wall, and I was like, what the fuck?
00:26:51.000 And I closed one eye, and I fell over and hit the other wall, and I was like, oh, man.
00:26:56.000 Something's wrong.
00:26:57.000 Something's seriously wrong with my brain.
00:27:00.000 And I start freaking out.
00:27:02.000 So I go get a CAT scan.
00:27:04.000 I go get an MRI. And I'm convinced that I'm concussed and that I've taken too many shots and I'm It's because...
00:27:13.000 Let me back the story up a little bit.
00:27:15.000 Why I think this is because my buddy Scott Parker, he's the enforcer for the Colorado Avalanches, he can no longer take...
00:27:22.000 He has a problem with his brainstem.
00:27:23.000 He took too many punches.
00:27:25.000 If he takes one more, it's going to kill him, right?
00:27:27.000 So...
00:27:28.000 I'm, like, talking to him about this, and now he's, like, got it in my mind that I had the same thing.
00:27:32.000 Like, I'm thinking, like, I fall over, like, literally fall over, hit the wall.
00:27:35.000 I'm like, oh, fuck, something's really fucked up with me.
00:27:37.000 Anyways, I go get all these tests, go see an ear, nose, and throat doctor, and it turns out my septum's so deviated that I have, like, a sinus infection, and that it can't drain because my septum's deviated, so I have, like, this serious infection in my...
00:27:53.000 Left cheek.
00:27:54.000 And I had to get on medication to get it cleared up.
00:27:56.000 But that's why it fucked my equilibrium up.
00:27:58.000 So it was getting in your ear?
00:28:00.000 Yeah.
00:28:01.000 They're all connected, right?
00:28:02.000 Yeah, the infection somehow threw my...
00:28:04.000 I have no idea.
00:28:05.000 I know how to put this...
00:28:06.000 I still have to do it every day.
00:28:08.000 I've got to put this thing in my nose and it blows like a nasal spray.
00:28:13.000 You should get your shit fixed.
00:28:14.000 God, I need to.
00:28:15.000 I got mine fixed.
00:28:16.000 But then I had to stop fighting for a little while.
00:28:17.000 Nah, not that long.
00:28:18.000 Not that long, man.
00:28:19.000 I'm telling you.
00:28:20.000 It turns out I'm not mentally retarded.
00:28:22.000 I have an infection that I got cleared up, which is what I contacted you and I told Aubrey about and the CMT oils and the MCT oils and the alpha brain and started trying to, because this is the point where I thought I was fucking freaking out,
00:28:37.000 right?
00:28:38.000 Well, you started taking care of your health and supplementing it.
00:28:39.000 And now I feel fucking great, man.
00:28:41.000 Yeah, there's a big difference between supplementing and not supplementing.
00:28:44.000 And I've never, I've never taken anything.
00:28:46.000 I just never, everyone always, I was literally Budweiser and Fruit Roll-Ups, you know?
00:28:50.000 I know, we talked about it.
00:28:51.000 And now I fucking take these Onnit packs day and night, sometimes two a day.
00:28:56.000 I feel fucking, you know what I feel like?
00:28:58.000 A fucking cage gorilla that's 15 year old.
00:29:01.000 And I don't know if it has testosterone or not, but I feel like a...
00:29:04.000 Like, my poor girl, she's ravaged now.
00:29:06.000 Like, I feel like an uncaged beast, man.
00:29:09.000 I'm sure she's happy.
00:29:10.000 Yeah, she's very happy.
00:29:11.000 So, you know, and I don't...
00:29:13.000 I don't know if it's because it just equaled out my body or...
00:29:17.000 Or what?
00:29:17.000 But man, I feel it.
00:29:18.000 My recovery time is great.
00:29:19.000 And I'm not here just pumping on it, you know?
00:29:21.000 I'm like, I'm serious.
00:29:21.000 I've never taken supplements and I feel so fucking good.
00:29:24.000 And right when I walked out, I said, hey man, you got any alpha brain here I can fucking pop, you know?
00:29:28.000 And so...
00:29:29.000 Are we out?
00:29:30.000 Do we have some?
00:29:31.000 There's out.
00:29:32.000 Damn it.
00:29:33.000 I must have some in my bag.
00:29:36.000 So yeah, it's unbelievable, man, how good I feel and how you don't know till you know, right?
00:29:42.000 Right.
00:29:42.000 Yeah, that's the key, man.
00:29:44.000 The key is a lot of people walk around and they don't take anything and they think they don't need anything.
00:29:49.000 And they're like, ah, I'm fine.
00:29:51.000 Well, you're fine.
00:29:52.000 You'll exist.
00:29:54.000 But there's a big difference between having your body optimized and not being optimized.
00:29:58.000 Healthy food, you gotta get off the candy, son.
00:30:01.000 You know what?
00:30:02.000 I don't fucking eat candy anymore.
00:30:04.000 Ever since I've been taking these pills, it's like it filled a void.
00:30:08.000 Literally.
00:30:08.000 I don't crave the sweets like I used to.
00:30:13.000 It's unbelievable, man.
00:30:14.000 I can honestly say I've ditched the candy.
00:30:16.000 I'll eat a Snickers bar every now and then, but I don't take handfuls of milk duds and Skittles like I used to every day.
00:30:22.000 I bet a lot of that is probiotics.
00:30:24.000 I used to crash, right?
00:30:25.000 Yeah.
00:30:25.000 And I feel like that's why I'd eat the candy to try and like...
00:30:28.000 Come back up.
00:30:29.000 Come back up, but...
00:30:29.000 Yeah.
00:30:30.000 Definitely.
00:30:30.000 I'm sure.
00:30:31.000 Are you taking probiotics now?
00:30:32.000 Everything.
00:30:33.000 The gut.
00:30:33.000 Total gut health?
00:30:34.000 Total gut health.
00:30:34.000 That's big because your gut health determines a lot of times what you crave.
00:30:38.000 And one of the things that people find is when they get off sugar and they get off gluten and they get off simple carbohydrates, breads and pastas and stuff like that.
00:30:47.000 What part of that makes me crave the pussy?
00:30:49.000 Is that the...
00:30:49.000 That's natural.
00:30:50.000 Oh, natural.
00:30:51.000 That's your body going, I'm a cowboy.
00:30:53.000 I'm a cowboy.
00:30:54.000 I'm here to fuck.
00:30:55.000 I'm a cowboy.
00:30:56.000 Not unequaled out?
00:30:57.000 Okay, I got you.
00:30:57.000 The same part that makes you want to fight makes you want to fuck.
00:31:00.000 Gotcha.
00:31:00.000 It's a part of the whole gorilla DNA. Alright.
00:31:04.000 Are you taking T-plus?
00:31:07.000 Yes.
00:31:08.000 That optimizes your hormones.
00:31:10.000 That's a big one.
00:31:12.000 There's alpha brain, which one of the good things about alpha brain is mental fatigue.
00:31:15.000 One of the things that helps you in your workouts is, a lot of times, physical fatigue is one factor, but mental fatigue is a factor, too.
00:31:23.000 When you step up, even if your body's tired, If your mind feels good, you could force your body to go through the motions.
00:31:29.000 You could force your body to do it because your mind still feels energetic.
00:31:33.000 But when my mind feels shitty, like for me, the hardest workouts by far are when I'm hungover.
00:31:39.000 Yeah.
00:31:40.000 Because my mind is tired.
00:31:41.000 It's not even like my body can't lift the weight.
00:31:44.000 It's like my body's like, oh, okay, we'll do it.
00:31:47.000 But my mind is like, I can't.
00:31:49.000 I can't.
00:31:49.000 I can't muster it.
00:31:51.000 So alpha brain post-drinking is fantastic.
00:31:55.000 It's one of the best things for hangovers because a lot of things that are going on, you're dehydrated, that's a big factor, but also like all your electrolytes are all fucked up and all your neurotransmitter levels are all fucked up.
00:32:08.000 You could jack those back up with alpha brain and new mood.
00:32:11.000 New mood's a big one too because it brings up your serotonin levels, 5-HTP. That comes in the night pack for sleeping, right?
00:32:17.000 Yeah.
00:32:18.000 Perfect.
00:32:18.000 And I tell people, oh, you're trying to sell off me.
00:32:20.000 Listen to me.
00:32:21.000 Please don't buy it.
00:32:23.000 Please don't buy it.
00:32:24.000 Find out what the ingredients are.
00:32:25.000 Go buy your own shit.
00:32:27.000 Go buy it.
00:32:27.000 The best form you can buy.
00:32:29.000 That's the most important thing.
00:32:30.000 Buy the purest, best version of it you can find.
00:32:33.000 Use all those things.
00:32:34.000 Use choline.
00:32:35.000 Use all these different ingredients you're going to find in AlphaBrain and all the different ingredients you're going to find in New Mood.
00:32:40.000 You're going to have results.
00:32:41.000 But if you want to get it made for you in the best possible form, that's what we sell.
00:32:46.000 That's what we're trying to do on it.
00:32:48.000 Everything that I use, everything that Aubrey uses, everything that all the pro athletes use, guys like you use, we just find that.
00:32:55.000 What's the best shit?
00:32:56.000 What's the best shit?
00:32:59.000 I literally feel the best I've felt in my life.
00:33:01.000 I don't know if it has to do with solely taking on it or just reinventing myself, man.
00:33:09.000 You gotta sometimes just fucking step back and reset and figure out what works for you, right?
00:33:14.000 That's big.
00:33:15.000 Real big.
00:33:16.000 And it took a lady, Francesca Parker, Scott's wife, to set me down and fucking tell me, cowboy, what's the bad in your life?
00:33:23.000 We gotta get the energy vampires off you, and you gotta hone in and figure out what works for you again, man.
00:33:30.000 And I did, and I feel fucking great, man.
00:33:32.000 Has Aubrey taken you into the room in his house for the launching into space?
00:33:36.000 No.
00:33:36.000 The psychedelic journey room?
00:33:38.000 No.
00:33:38.000 Are you ready for that?
00:33:39.000 I'm ready for that.
00:33:40.000 Are you ready for that?
00:33:41.000 I'm ready for that.
00:33:41.000 I'm ready for that, too.
00:33:42.000 I need to do it this year.
00:33:44.000 I'm about a year off.
00:33:46.000 I've done it.
00:33:47.000 I did it about a year ago.
00:33:49.000 I'm feeling like right about now I'm ready to get back in there.
00:33:51.000 Let's do it together.
00:33:52.000 Okay.
00:33:53.000 Let's do it.
00:33:53.000 Let's hook up with Aubrey and we'll figure out a time.
00:33:55.000 We've got to go meet the overlords.
00:33:58.000 Okay.
00:33:59.000 I'm telling you, man.
00:34:01.000 All the shit that you say is crazy, I believe it's crazy, but it ain't crazy like DMT is crazy.
00:34:07.000 All right.
00:34:08.000 DMT is some next level crazy.
00:34:10.000 So you're telling us, let's go do some drugs and hang out.
00:34:12.000 I'm telling you...
00:34:13.000 Is this USADA approved?
00:34:16.000 Yes.
00:34:17.000 Perfect.
00:34:17.000 It is.
00:34:17.000 All right.
00:34:18.000 Well, you can't test for it.
00:34:19.000 All right.
00:34:19.000 And it exists in your own brain.
00:34:21.000 It's like testing you for saliva.
00:34:23.000 All right.
00:34:23.000 Literally, it's like testing you for blood.
00:34:25.000 I'm in.
00:34:25.000 Cowboy test positive for red platelets.
00:34:27.000 I'm in.
00:34:28.000 Yeah, we're gonna get in there.
00:34:29.000 I'm totally in it.
00:34:30.000 Woo!
00:34:31.000 We're going deep.
00:34:32.000 So you feel like DMT, or what is the tea that people take, where we get the shaman and you go and you drink the...
00:34:39.000 Oh, ayahuasca.
00:34:39.000 Ayahuasca.
00:34:40.000 That's DMT, too.
00:34:41.000 I mean, I feel like if we just ate a fucking handful of mushrooms, we could have the same psychedelic trip.
00:34:46.000 DMT is mushrooms times a million plus aliens.
00:34:49.000 Huh.
00:34:50.000 I don't know if...
00:34:52.000 That's the way I describe it.
00:34:54.000 I've done mushrooms and mushrooms are awesome.
00:34:56.000 You gotta take a shitload of mushrooms and you have an amazing trip.
00:34:59.000 But there's something about DMT that just blows all the other ones out of the water.
00:35:04.000 It's the most potent of all psychedelics.
00:35:06.000 The most transcendent of all psychedelics.
00:35:09.000 See, I feel like you're a black belt in psychedelics.
00:35:12.000 I'm a...
00:35:13.000 My first day white belt.
00:35:14.000 Doesn't matter, man.
00:35:16.000 You can do it.
00:35:17.000 Everybody can do it.
00:35:18.000 I'm sure I can do it.
00:35:19.000 You go from a white belt to a black belt literally in your first class.
00:35:22.000 You go, oh, shit.
00:35:24.000 And you come back.
00:35:25.000 And by the way, you're never really a black belt.
00:35:27.000 Even when you do it.
00:35:28.000 I've done it, I don't know how many times now.
00:35:30.000 But every time I do it, I'm like, oh, fuck.
00:35:32.000 Here I go.
00:35:33.000 I get nervous.
00:35:34.000 I'm white knuckling.
00:35:36.000 Before you take that first hit of the pipe, you go, okay.
00:35:41.000 It just takes one.
00:35:42.000 Here we go.
00:35:43.000 Three hits.
00:35:44.000 Three hits.
00:35:44.000 Three hits is what I recommend.
00:35:46.000 Big, deep one.
00:35:48.000 Blow it out.
00:35:50.000 Going again.
00:35:50.000 I can't limp in.
00:35:51.000 I can't just do one.
00:35:53.000 You don't want to get to the door.
00:35:55.000 You don't want to get to the door.
00:35:56.000 It's like, you know, you play Ding Dong Ditch, ring someone's doorbell and run away.
00:35:59.000 You can't do that.
00:36:00.000 You gotta open up the door and you gotta get in the house.
00:36:03.000 All in.
00:36:03.000 I gotta go all in.
00:36:04.000 Yeah.
00:36:05.000 It's amazing.
00:36:06.000 Now, does it make you shit yourself?
00:36:08.000 No, no, no.
00:36:09.000 Like the tea?
00:36:09.000 The problem with the tea is that your body rejects all...
00:36:12.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:36:13.000 Everyone says that you're purging the bad energy.
00:36:16.000 That's why I said no.
00:36:17.000 That's my argument.
00:36:18.000 No, you're just throwing up and shitting yourself because you have to shit.
00:36:20.000 You shouldn't have ate the Del Taco before you fucking took it.
00:36:23.000 Well, you definitely are supposed to alter your diet.
00:36:25.000 You're definitely supposed to have an alkaline-based diet before you do it.
00:36:29.000 I mean, that should be a sense that you're going to fucking blow your backside out because you're like, you need a fast before you come into this.
00:36:34.000 Yeah, that's not you purging out bad energy.
00:36:36.000 That's you fucking purging out just the shit you ate.
00:36:39.000 Well, this is like hippy-dippy, new-age way of talking where people go, oh, it's the toxins.
00:36:45.000 You're getting rid of the toxins.
00:36:46.000 The toxins, like, they do that in yoga all the time.
00:36:49.000 When you're in this position, this position releases toxins.
00:36:53.000 It clears your body of all the emotions.
00:36:57.000 No, you're stretching.
00:36:58.000 Shut the fuck up.
00:36:59.000 I'm with you.
00:37:00.000 You're not purging.
00:37:01.000 You're sweating.
00:37:02.000 If you're sweating, your body's getting rid of some fluid.
00:37:05.000 There's definitely a cleansing process involved in that.
00:37:07.000 There's no fucking toxins.
00:37:09.000 Like, come on.
00:37:10.000 Stop with the toxins.
00:37:11.000 You're throwing up.
00:37:12.000 At least we're on the same page.
00:37:14.000 Let's just do drugs and have fun.
00:37:15.000 Yes.
00:37:15.000 Okay.
00:37:17.000 Ayahuasca is DMT, but what it is, it's an orally active version of DMT. I'll give you the quick breakdown.
00:37:23.000 Okay.
00:37:23.000 Your body produces, your gut produces something called monoamine oxidase.
00:37:27.000 And what it is, is it breaks down DMT. So if you eat like grass, like there's certain types of grasses and lettuce and a bunch of different plants, like thousands of different plants have DMT in them.
00:37:39.000 But you don't trip when you eat them.
00:37:41.000 The reason why is because your stomach produces something called monoamine oxidase.
00:37:45.000 Well, these indigenous people in the Amazon, they've figured out how to combine one plant, which has DMT in it, and then another plant, which has an MAO inhibitor.
00:37:54.000 Right.
00:37:54.000 So this MAO inhibitor inhibits your body's production of monoamine oxidase, and so the DMT naturally absorbs in your body.
00:38:01.000 But you're eating these fucked up plants that taste like shit.
00:38:05.000 They taste like a toad's dick.
00:38:06.000 Right.
00:38:07.000 And you're just throwing up and shitting yourself.
00:38:11.000 It's supposed to be an incredible spiritual experience.
00:38:13.000 I haven't done it.
00:38:13.000 I've only done the way stronger version of it, which you smoke, which doesn't give you any throwing up, any diarrhea.
00:38:21.000 Which sounds way better.
00:38:22.000 It's way better.
00:38:23.000 It's gotta be.
00:38:24.000 I think the other one's really amazing too, but the thing about the DMT thing, they call it the businessman's trip, is you're in and out in 15 minutes.
00:38:31.000 It's perfect.
00:38:32.000 How do you feel after?
00:38:34.000 Amazing.
00:38:35.000 So you're not hungover?
00:38:37.000 No.
00:38:37.000 It's one of the most transient drugs ever observed in the human body.
00:38:43.000 Your body brings you back to baseline really quickly.
00:38:46.000 So you're high as a fucking...
00:38:48.000 You're in the center of the universe.
00:38:50.000 Yeah, literally.
00:38:51.000 You're talking to...
00:38:51.000 Geometric patterns that are made out of love and understanding and know everything about everything you've ever done your whole life and Recognize your bullshit and dissolve your ego right in front of you show you your life and in like these Hieroglyphs and show you these insane images that are made out of like neon with no borders And then 15 minutes later your cowboy again But you're renewed.
00:39:16.000 It's like resetting your whole experience on this planet.
00:39:19.000 I'm in.
00:39:19.000 I'm in.
00:39:20.000 You sold me.
00:39:21.000 It's going to be good for you.
00:39:21.000 See how good you explained that?
00:39:22.000 I wish I could explain my diving that good because I was just like, ah, you fucking go in and breathe some other gas and...
00:39:28.000 I think you did a great job.
00:39:29.000 That was it.
00:39:30.000 I think you did a great job explaining it.
00:39:32.000 But I think there's a bunch of factors going on.
00:39:34.000 I think with your life, all the good things that are happening, I think first of all, a decision to go to 170 is a very good one.
00:39:41.000 I think the number one problem we have in fighting today, the number one problem is weight cutting.
00:39:48.000 Yeah, I'm fucking with you, man.
00:39:50.000 The whole time I was at 55, I'd always, you know how I like to fight, so I'd call, hey, a 170 pounder fell out, I'll take that fight.
00:39:57.000 You know what Joe and Daniel would tell me?
00:39:58.000 What?
00:39:59.000 Calbi, you're at 55, those guys are fucking monsters.
00:40:02.000 I guess they were wrong, weren't they?
00:40:04.000 She called me.
00:40:05.000 I would have told you to do it.
00:40:07.000 No offense, but you don't have the fucking stamp that gave me the fight.
00:40:11.000 I know.
00:40:11.000 I need to get a stamp.
00:40:12.000 So, now I'm at 70, and I want to fight at 55, and they say, no, you're fucking so great at 70, you don't want to go down to 55. God damn it.
00:40:20.000 Will you guys make up your fucking mind, what I can do?
00:40:22.000 You can't listen to those dudes.
00:40:23.000 Only listen to me.
00:40:24.000 I'll go through you.
00:40:25.000 I'll be your manager from now on.
00:40:27.000 I'm going to handle you.
00:40:28.000 Contact me.
00:40:29.000 I'll contact them.
00:40:30.000 I'm speaking for Cowboy.
00:40:32.000 Bam, done.
00:40:34.000 Hey man, when I walked in, I seen you had a Wheeler album out front.
00:40:38.000 Wheeler Walker, that's my man.
00:40:39.000 So I was getting ready in the locker room, and I was kicking ass and eating pussy.
00:40:44.000 And it starts off jamming.
00:40:47.000 And we get there kind of, you know, a little bit earlier.
00:40:50.000 And so we still had all the, I think I had six people in my locker room.
00:40:56.000 And I have like a big ass speaker, like a big jukebox.
00:40:59.000 And I just take over.
00:41:00.000 Like, everyone good with country?
00:41:01.000 Okay, good.
00:41:02.000 I've seen you already wins.
00:41:03.000 So I start playing.
00:41:04.000 And then when I start warming up, that's what I throw on.
00:41:07.000 And motherfuckers, people were like, okay.
00:41:10.000 Okay.
00:41:11.000 Well, how about when it goes to sucking dick and kicking ass?
00:41:17.000 Yeah, I noticed that when I walked in.
00:41:19.000 I was like, oh, okay.
00:41:20.000 Yeah, he's a buddy of mine.
00:41:21.000 I love that dude.
00:41:23.000 He's hilarious.
00:41:24.000 He's fucking hilarious.
00:41:26.000 Have you ever seen the video for that song?
00:41:27.000 No.
00:41:28.000 The video for that song is hilarious because they did it at this real country western thing, and the people in the audience had no idea he was going to be there, and they had no idea what he did, and so they played it for these regular country music people.
00:41:43.000 We could play it because Wheeler's a buddy of mine, man.
00:41:46.000 I'm sure we could play shit.
00:41:47.000 Can they hear this right here now?
00:41:49.000 Yeah.
00:41:50.000 Here's the video.
00:41:51.000 Let's watch the video.
00:41:53.000 Put your headphones on.
00:41:54.000 Do I stop this one?
00:41:55.000 Yeah.
00:41:57.000 Go ahead.
00:41:58.000 Hit it.
00:41:58.000 Stop mine.
00:41:59.000 You put yours on.
00:42:05.000 Because he did an acoustic version of it.
00:42:11.000 Look at these people!
00:42:19.000 Look at these people in the audience.
00:42:21.000 They have no idea.
00:42:22.000 This is the same people in the training room with me.
00:42:24.000 They're like, what the fuck is Calvin listening to?
00:42:27.000 Look at the way they're looking at him!
00:42:29.000 What I do...
00:42:32.000 Pussy in the morning.
00:42:33.000 Pussy in the night.
00:42:35.000 There's a lot of pussy that I get into a fight.
00:42:38.000 See?
00:42:39.000 It's a hit.
00:42:39.000 That's a fucking hit, right?
00:42:41.000 Yeah.
00:42:41.000 For you, it's a perfect song, too.
00:42:43.000 It's perfect.
00:42:44.000 I loved it, yeah.
00:42:45.000 And it was just funny, everyone in the changing room was like, what the fuck?
00:42:51.000 It was good, man.
00:42:51.000 It was awesome.
00:42:52.000 I think the UFC and MMA in general should make a concerted effort to stop weight cutting.
00:42:57.000 Just stop it.
00:42:58.000 Stop it dead.
00:42:59.000 Say no more.
00:43:00.000 And just eliminate it completely.
00:43:02.000 And I think it can be done.
00:43:03.000 I think it can be done if you have just set up good fights between guys that are the same size.
00:43:10.000 I think this whole obsession with championship belts and all this stuff is all great and everything.
00:43:16.000 Here's a perfect example.
00:43:17.000 Conor and Nate Diaz.
00:43:18.000 Biggest fucking fight in the history of the sport.
00:43:21.000 No belt on the line.
00:43:23.000 Nothing.
00:43:23.000 Just throwing down.
00:43:24.000 Nobody gave a fuck.
00:43:25.000 Nobody said, where's the gold?
00:43:27.000 Where's the strap?
00:43:28.000 Where's the leather?
00:43:29.000 Nobody gave a fuck.
00:43:29.000 So you feel like UFC's going more towards big fights than in his championship fights?
00:43:32.000 I hope that's what they do.
00:43:34.000 I hope so too.
00:43:35.000 I hope they just take the guys who people want to see.
00:43:39.000 Can you announce that fight?
00:43:40.000 That fight that you were talking about?
00:43:41.000 No.
00:43:41.000 No?
00:43:42.000 Damn it.
00:43:42.000 I can't.
00:43:43.000 It's not 100% yet, but it's going to be fucking good.
00:43:46.000 Oh, there's a fight brewing, ladies and gentlemen.
00:43:49.000 There's a fight brewing.
00:43:49.000 And it's a good one.
00:43:52.000 Hopefully today we get the double thumbs up.
00:43:55.000 I mean, I sent last night.
00:43:57.000 Last night we got the half thumb.
00:43:59.000 Well, you got a half thumb.
00:44:00.000 You already have a pose down, a photo of the two of you guys together.
00:44:04.000 Holy shit, that's going to be a good fight.
00:44:06.000 And that could potentially be Madison Square Garden?
00:44:08.000 Yeah.
00:44:08.000 I mean, that's what I'm fucking.
00:44:11.000 They didn't put me on 200, and they fucked me on that, but I really wanted to be on Madison Square Garden, man.
00:44:17.000 The 200 was great.
00:44:18.000 But 202 was better, I think.
00:44:19.000 Yes, it was better.
00:44:21.000 It was.
00:44:21.000 200 was great because it was a celebration, but 202 was a better card.
00:44:25.000 Yes.
00:44:25.000 Absolutely.
00:44:26.000 Well, the Brock Lesnar thing was kind of a freak show.
00:44:29.000 Like, holy shit, Brock Lesnar's back, and Amanda Nunes and Misha Tate was a hell of a fight.
00:44:35.000 Amanda Nunes is no joke, son.
00:44:37.000 No joke.
00:44:39.000 There's some next-level women out there now, man.
00:44:42.000 There are.
00:44:42.000 That Valentina Shevchenko chick, holy shit.
00:44:46.000 Holly Holm, and there's just so many high-level chicks now, and fucking Joanna Jacek is just a straight-up assassin.
00:44:54.000 Yeah, I trained with her a little bit of muscle form.
00:44:56.000 She came and visited.
00:44:57.000 It was fun.
00:44:58.000 She's a badass bitch.
00:44:59.000 Oh yeah, she is.
00:44:59.000 All due respect.
00:45:00.000 All due respect.
00:45:01.000 You have to say that now.
00:45:02.000 All due respect.
00:45:02.000 Do you know how many phone calls I got before I came on here?
00:45:06.000 There should be an advisory sticker on this for...
00:45:09.000 What words I can and cannot say.
00:45:11.000 Well, who said that to you?
00:45:12.000 People?
00:45:13.000 Well, I had, you know, some people from the PR team at UFC and then my management team.
00:45:18.000 So, I have a tendency to say bad words.
00:45:21.000 Isn't that hilarious?
00:45:22.000 It is.
00:45:22.000 It is.
00:45:23.000 And I don't mean it in a derogatory or...
00:45:27.000 That's just how I talk, you know?
00:45:28.000 Well, you should talk how you talk.
00:45:30.000 I'm telling you, cowboy, I gotta be your fucking manager.
00:45:32.000 That's it.
00:45:33.000 That's it.
00:45:33.000 There's all these suits in the way of the freedom.
00:45:35.000 It's the sponsors, man.
00:45:37.000 The sponsors.
00:45:38.000 I need another beer.
00:45:39.000 I'm getting worked up.
00:45:40.000 It's the sponsors, man.
00:45:41.000 They can't take it.
00:45:42.000 They can't...
00:45:43.000 Well, they need to take it.
00:45:44.000 That's what I think, too.
00:45:45.000 Goddammit.
00:45:45.000 What the fuck do they think you're popular for?
00:45:46.000 They think you're popular for wearing a bow tie and talking about...
00:45:50.000 For being wide open, right?
00:45:51.000 Hey, man, why were I... Look at this.
00:45:53.000 This is my...
00:45:55.000 Colorado Springs Fire Department.
00:45:56.000 My dad's captain of the fire department.
00:45:57.000 I was just down there.
00:45:58.000 They sent some shirts for you.
00:45:59.000 Oh, beautiful.
00:46:00.000 Yeah, they're listening.
00:46:01.000 They're like your biggest fucking fans, man.
00:46:03.000 Oh, awesome, man.
00:46:03.000 I'll wear these.
00:46:04.000 Fuck you.
00:46:04.000 So they wanted you to have those.
00:46:06.000 Come bearing gifts.
00:46:08.000 So Station 12, thank you.
00:46:11.000 Appreciate it.
00:46:11.000 I like it.
00:46:12.000 Awesome.
00:46:12.000 I'll wear those.
00:46:13.000 Right on.
00:46:14.000 Thank you.
00:46:14.000 Yeah, no worries.
00:46:15.000 I was just over there.
00:46:18.000 Everyone I fucking talk to loves you, man, so I just give you a shout out, man.
00:46:22.000 I love them, too.
00:46:22.000 That's good.
00:46:23.000 They say how much you've changed their life, just talking about diet, talking about good times, and, you know, so...
00:46:28.000 It's awesome.
00:46:29.000 Beautiful.
00:46:30.000 It's good to know you can...
00:46:31.000 Oh, more beer.
00:46:32.000 Look at you.
00:46:32.000 Yes, sir.
00:46:34.000 Look at us.
00:46:34.000 We're crushing them.
00:46:35.000 We're about to be talking about some good shit here in a little bit.
00:46:37.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:46:38.000 We're gonna get to the point where fuck the PR team.
00:46:40.000 That's sick.
00:46:41.000 Who the fuck are they, man?
00:46:43.000 Are you hiring?
00:46:44.000 Are you hiring?
00:46:45.000 Good.
00:46:47.000 The UFC's got to be in a weird position with this show, because they know we talk, like, if you watched the last one with me and Eddie Bravo, Eddie Bravo was so fucking drunk, he barely knew what he was talking about 15 seconds ago, and he was going on about how he doesn't believe the rovers on Mars are real,
00:47:03.000 he doesn't know why the water sticks to the Earth, because the Earth is round, why doesn't the water just roll off the Earth?
00:47:10.000 How do you know that the Earth is spinning?
00:47:16.000 It just got so bizarre.
00:47:19.000 They can't worry about that though, man.
00:47:21.000 Everybody worries about you being you.
00:47:24.000 People like someone who is actually themselves because it's so fucking rare today.
00:47:29.000 And I feel like I've been myself the whole journey.
00:47:31.000 And that's to my grandma's credit.
00:47:33.000 She always tells me, don't fucking paint yourself in the corner no matter what you do.
00:47:36.000 Don't paint yourself.
00:47:37.000 Be you through and through.
00:47:39.000 And I always have, you know?
00:47:41.000 I probably always will be.
00:47:42.000 So I told my manager, I'm probably gonna say some fucked up shit and you're gonna have to put out the fires.
00:47:46.000 It's not fucked up!
00:47:47.000 It's what you really think.
00:47:48.000 Right?
00:47:49.000 You know?
00:47:49.000 God damn it.
00:47:51.000 It's just, there's nothing wrong with it, man.
00:47:52.000 They gotta understand, like, this is what they do.
00:47:54.000 They market things.
00:47:55.000 But they, somehow in their mind, they think that, oh, the best way to market things is to not piss anybody off.
00:48:01.000 That's not true.
00:48:02.000 The best way to market things is to have a guy like you, who's out there, diving 300 fucking feet, Playing with sharks and shit, riding jet skis, and doing all kinds of banana shit.
00:48:13.000 You're a fucking madman.
00:48:15.000 You're a genuine madman.
00:48:17.000 And they want to take you, and they want to turn you into some fucking cookie cutter person that they could sell.
00:48:25.000 It's bullshit.
00:48:26.000 It is bullshit.
00:48:26.000 I'm with you.
00:48:27.000 And they can't sell that.
00:48:28.000 I'm with you.
00:48:29.000 Hoorah to that.
00:48:30.000 They want you to be Luke Bryan!
00:48:32.000 They want you to have genes that are already ripped!
00:48:36.000 They want to give you those fucking pre-ripped jeans.
00:48:38.000 Look, we scuffed up your boots for you.
00:48:40.000 Fuck you!
00:48:41.000 Fuck you, right?
00:48:42.000 Fuck you!
00:48:43.000 That's it.
00:48:43.000 I'm with you.
00:48:44.000 Fuck them.
00:48:45.000 Fuck them all.
00:48:45.000 I like that this beer says America on it.
00:48:47.000 Now you're a fan?
00:48:48.000 I'm a big fan.
00:48:49.000 I can get a couple cases dropped off any time you want.
00:48:50.000 You let me know.
00:48:51.000 Let's do it.
00:48:52.000 Just like you send me on it, I'll send you Budweiser.
00:48:54.000 We should have just a flag that just fucking gives beer.
00:48:58.000 Just a giant flag.
00:49:00.000 Fill a flag up with beer.
00:49:03.000 A big gigantic sack of beer.
00:49:05.000 What are we going to get you talking about loose?
00:49:07.000 That's what I can't wait.
00:49:08.000 We'll get you about two, three more in and you're going to be loose.
00:49:11.000 Pretty much.
00:49:12.000 I try to be loose.
00:49:13.000 Then you're going to spark up a joint and we're going to call it good times.
00:49:16.000 Ever since I got that Fear Factor money, I got loose.
00:49:19.000 That Fear Factor money makes you loose.
00:49:21.000 I'm still waiting for that UFC big money to come in.
00:49:23.000 It's coming.
00:49:24.000 It's coming.
00:49:24.000 It's got to come now.
00:49:25.000 Did you sign a new contract?
00:49:27.000 I did.
00:49:27.000 You did?
00:49:27.000 Are you happy?
00:49:28.000 Yeah.
00:49:29.000 There's a pause there.
00:49:30.000 I don't like it.
00:49:31.000 I'm happy.
00:49:31.000 I like the pause!
00:49:33.000 I mean, am I as happy as I'd like to be?
00:49:36.000 Nah.
00:49:37.000 Am I skipping?
00:49:38.000 No, but...
00:49:38.000 Let me tell you something, man.
00:49:39.000 I googled.
00:49:40.000 I had to take a photo today and put it on my Instagram, and I googled Donald, and it went Trump, and then I put in the word C, and it was instantly Cerrone.
00:49:50.000 You're a famous motherfucker, dude.
00:49:51.000 Hell yeah.
00:49:52.000 We need to get you paid.
00:49:53.000 I need to be your fucking manager!
00:49:57.000 Do you want to be on the team?
00:50:00.000 I just don't want to get paid for it.
00:50:03.000 I want to be like, I'm just the guy who calls.
00:50:05.000 Just call me if shit gets weird.
00:50:08.000 Well, your answer is going to be the same as mine.
00:50:09.000 Fuck it.
00:50:10.000 Fuck it!
00:50:11.000 That's what it should be.
00:50:12.000 I feel like a guy like you, honestly, should be completely insulated from anybody's advice.
00:50:18.000 I feel like a guy like you, it should be like your friends and your family and people you love, and everybody else has to shut the fuck up and just let you go.
00:50:27.000 That's how I feel every day.
00:50:29.000 And then I get phone calls saying, you can't say that, Kelby.
00:50:32.000 You can't do that, Kelby.
00:50:33.000 You have to do this.
00:50:35.000 It's wild.
00:50:36.000 Yeah, I mean, they have to understand.
00:50:38.000 People talk a certain way, and they express themselves a certain way, and there's an honesty in what you do that you're not going to find in that many people.
00:50:49.000 There's an honesty in expressing yourself that is being lost.
00:50:52.000 It's being squashed.
00:50:53.000 It's just the way I'm geared.
00:50:55.000 I'm with you, man.
00:50:56.000 I wish things were different.
00:50:57.000 I really do.
00:50:58.000 It is different!
00:50:59.000 You don't have to listen!
00:51:00.000 Oh, I do.
00:51:01.000 Fuck them!
00:51:02.000 I do.
00:51:03.000 Fuck them!
00:51:04.000 This company we're drinking right here, they don't allow me to say certain things sometimes.
00:51:08.000 Wow, Budweiser America.
00:51:10.000 Listen, Budweiser, we got a problem now.
00:51:12.000 You write America on your Budweiser.
00:51:16.000 Understand this.
00:51:17.000 Like, whoa, we're not in all that pot smoking talk.
00:51:21.000 Pot smoking is American.
00:51:22.000 All this is American.
00:51:24.000 Beer is American.
00:51:25.000 They go hand in hand.
00:51:26.000 One of them's not bad, one of them's not good.
00:51:28.000 They're all good.
00:51:29.000 I try to explain to people, like, you can't...
00:51:34.000 Get a bobcat in your backyard and not think he's gonna fucking attack you.
00:51:37.000 Exactly.
00:51:38.000 That's how I feel with me, too.
00:51:40.000 Like, I'm a wild motherfucker.
00:51:42.000 Like, you can't take the leash off me.
00:51:44.000 You can't put the leash on me and take me, kiss handshake babies, then let the leash off and let me.
00:51:49.000 And say, oh, he's gonna be alright.
00:51:51.000 Fuck, no he's not.
00:51:52.000 They can't turn you into some fucking sitcom dad.
00:51:56.000 Okay?
00:51:57.000 Where the wife comes home and yells at you like, well, I thought I took the trash out.
00:52:01.000 Yeah.
00:52:05.000 That's what they want to do!
00:52:06.000 They want to figure out how to extract money out of you.
00:52:08.000 So when a guy like you starts talking crazy shit, they're like, oh, they're going to protest!
00:52:13.000 Oh, look out!
00:52:14.000 The transgender lesbian slash animal rights community that doesn't like you diving...
00:52:26.000 Yeah.
00:52:26.000 God, I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't skydive or dive in the water.
00:52:31.000 You have a problem with your brain.
00:52:33.000 Serious problem.
00:52:33.000 You have a problem with your brain where your thrill meter gets low and you panic and then you've got to juice that bitch back up and it gets low and you've got to juice that bitch back up.
00:52:41.000 And that's why you're a great fighter.
00:52:42.000 And when we're on DMT, am I going to face these demons, you think?
00:52:46.000 Oh, for sure.
00:52:47.000 Okay.
00:52:47.000 But you'll be fine.
00:52:48.000 What DMT is going to tell you, I would imagine, I don't know what they're going to tell you, and I'm sorry for even suggesting it.
00:52:54.000 Because when I go into it next time, they're going to go, oh, you know, you know what we're going to say, bitch?
00:52:59.000 Who's they?
00:52:59.000 Who's they?
00:53:00.000 How about this?
00:53:02.000 I think your life experience is a wonderful journey.
00:53:07.000 Here's what I believe, honestly.
00:53:08.000 I think what you're doing By fighting at this extremely high level and by entertaining millions of people worldwide is you're providing people with incredible thrills.
00:53:19.000 You know how many people sent me the animated gif of that final combination you landed on Rick's story?
00:53:25.000 Let's talk about that.
00:53:26.000 Oh!
00:53:26.000 Good lord!
00:53:27.000 Let's throw that bitch up on the screen.
00:53:30.000 Let's talk.
00:53:31.000 Everyone says how great this combo is.
00:53:33.000 Oh, it's beautiful.
00:53:34.000 Okay.
00:53:35.000 Here it is.
00:53:35.000 Oh, crack!
00:53:36.000 That's the end of it.
00:53:38.000 Watch it from the beginning.
00:53:39.000 Well, you know what I love about it, man?
00:53:41.000 I love technique.
00:53:42.000 Look at this.
00:53:43.000 This is what I love.
00:53:43.000 Pop, to the body, to the head, boom.
00:53:46.000 You know what I love about it?
00:53:47.000 Not a single one of those techniques is wound up.
00:53:50.000 Not a single one of those techniques is full power.
00:53:52.000 But look how you're doing this.
00:53:53.000 Pop, bank, crack!
00:53:57.000 So for everyone that's listening, all that is the jab, cross, hook, kick.
00:54:02.000 Yeah, but it's not, because here's the thing about it.
00:54:05.000 The way you're throwing all these things is the way everybody should throw every punch.
00:54:09.000 There's no wind-up.
00:54:11.000 Everything is perfect technique.
00:54:12.000 The execution, the timing...
00:54:15.000 The accuracy.
00:54:16.000 Look how beautiful this is, man.
00:54:17.000 See, this is you, so I bet it's hard for you to appreciate.
00:54:20.000 But for me, as a person who calls MMA, as a person who watches fights, dude, when I was calling that fight, I was like this.
00:54:26.000 I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, look at this.
00:54:29.000 Oh, this is perfect.
00:54:30.000 Do you know how upset I missed the triangle I am with myself?
00:54:33.000 Oh, my God.
00:54:34.000 This is better.
00:54:36.000 Look, he's a tough guy.
00:54:37.000 He's very tough.
00:54:38.000 He's got good submission defense.
00:54:39.000 So last time we talked, we talked about Cowboy watching himself.
00:54:42.000 I'm playing a video game.
00:54:43.000 I was in the mode, for sure.
00:54:45.000 Oh yeah, for sure.
00:54:45.000 I was in the mode.
00:54:46.000 That's some Matrix shit.
00:54:47.000 I mean, this to me is more impressive than when Anderson Silva knocked out Forrest Griffin.
00:54:52.000 Because when Anderson Silva knocked out Forrest Griffin, what I know about Forrest was that Forrest was compromised going into that fight.
00:54:58.000 He'd been knocked out twice in training camp.
00:55:00.000 He had a real hard time taking shots.
00:55:02.000 He probably shouldn't have been in there in the first place.
00:55:04.000 And so he had a lot of doubts and he was having a real hard time.
00:55:08.000 This is a big, powerful Rick Story who's a nasty motherfucker.
00:55:13.000 He throws vicious body shots.
00:55:15.000 He's a hard wrestler.
00:55:16.000 He's a guy who was the first loss that Johnny Hendricks got.
00:55:20.000 People don't know Rick Story.
00:55:22.000 Rick Story's a tough dude.
00:55:23.000 And for you to tee off on him like this, in this perfect way, not with big wound up fucking heavy shots like he throws.
00:55:32.000 What Rick Story likes to do is he pressures guys and he fucking digs in.
00:55:36.000 To the body, takes you down, beats you up.
00:55:39.000 He's a tough, tough dude.
00:55:41.000 And what you did is you just used perfect technique.
00:55:44.000 That angle, when you throw that left, you throw the left, the jab, you throw the right hand to the body, and then you take that, watch this, jab, right hand to the body.
00:55:52.000 Well, he fell off that way.
00:55:53.000 I didn't take an angle.
00:55:54.000 He did.
00:55:55.000 Boom!
00:55:56.000 That was all luck.
00:55:56.000 Yeah, but you adjusted.
00:55:58.000 You adjusted perfectly with that left.
00:55:59.000 You're trying to be nice.
00:56:01.000 You're trying to be nice about yourself.
00:56:02.000 Look, that's a beautiful combination, dude.
00:56:04.000 Thank you.
00:56:05.000 I appreciate it.
00:56:05.000 That's some matrix shit.
00:56:06.000 And I feel like a big part of that is you not depleting your body.
00:56:10.000 Absolutely.
00:56:11.000 Another big part of it is 170 pounders.
00:56:13.000 Don't think you can just come take my body shots anymore because I got a little more biscuit now.
00:56:20.000 Yeah, right?
00:56:22.000 You don't have to...
00:56:22.000 Weak-ass body.
00:56:23.000 Jesus.
00:56:24.000 What did your body feel like when you fought 155?
00:56:26.000 Like, when you compare yourself to a normal training session, like, say you're several months in between fights...
00:56:33.000 So I walk around once...
00:56:35.000 I used to walk around about 174, right?
00:56:38.000 That was like my...
00:56:39.000 Deep training camp.
00:56:40.000 And I noticed when I started to cut, I'd get down to, you know, 168, 170, but I had nothing in the gas tank, man.
00:56:47.000 I would always be like, it was all mental at that point, you know?
00:56:50.000 And I didn't have, like, my body felt real thin and brittle.
00:56:54.000 170, I feel good.
00:56:55.000 I don't feel the, I got the extra tank, you know?
00:56:58.000 Yeah.
00:56:59.000 I don't feel like it's...
00:57:00.000 That's a big part of it.
00:57:01.000 Oh my God, is it?
00:57:02.000 It's a big part of it, man.
00:57:04.000 Now you spitting into that thing?
00:57:05.000 What's going on here?
00:57:06.000 It's the one I'm drinking.
00:57:07.000 Copenhagen?
00:57:08.000 No, I know.
00:57:09.000 What is that shit?
00:57:10.000 Yeah.
00:57:13.000 Copenhagen.
00:57:14.000 What's the deal with that?
00:57:16.000 Explain that to me.
00:57:17.000 What does that do for you?
00:57:17.000 I've never been involved.
00:57:19.000 I have no experience in this.
00:57:20.000 I chewed tobacco once when I was a kid because I read Huckleberry Finn.
00:57:24.000 Did it give you a head high?
00:57:26.000 I threw up!
00:57:27.000 Yeah.
00:57:28.000 I started extra salivating and I felt like shit.
00:57:32.000 I don't know.
00:57:33.000 Is it good?
00:57:33.000 I like it.
00:57:34.000 Let me try some of that.
00:57:35.000 Give it a go.
00:57:36.000 What do you do with it?
00:57:37.000 Just take a little bump and put it under your lip.
00:57:39.000 A bump?
00:57:40.000 A little pinch.
00:57:41.000 Like a cocaine-style bump?
00:57:42.000 No.
00:57:42.000 I've never done that either.
00:57:43.000 I'd go less as much.
00:57:46.000 Yeah, that's plenty for you.
00:57:47.000 Is that too much?
00:57:47.000 No, it's good.
00:57:48.000 Okay, where do you put it?
00:57:49.000 Anywhere you put it, any lip you want.
00:57:51.000 Okay.
00:57:52.000 Yeah, it's going to start to burn a little bit.
00:57:54.000 I can't get cancer immediately, right?
00:57:55.000 I don't think so.
00:57:57.000 I mean...
00:57:58.000 No, you shouldn't.
00:58:00.000 That doesn't taste bad.
00:58:01.000 No, it's like a winter green gun.
00:58:03.000 Let's try spit in the right one.
00:58:04.000 Yeah, spit in the right one because you do not, I repeat, do not want to drink, chew, spit.
00:58:08.000 That is a fucking day gone bad.
00:58:10.000 Well, one of the guys who worked for the UFC who was a...
00:58:14.000 Jamie's laughing because I'm chewing.
00:58:17.000 It looks ridiculous?
00:58:18.000 Why does it look ridiculous?
00:58:19.000 You're going to get a super body high.
00:58:21.000 It's going to be great.
00:58:22.000 Can't wait.
00:58:22.000 One of the guys that was a stuntman for the UFC, or not the UFC, Fear Factor.
00:58:26.000 Yeah.
00:58:27.000 He worked on so many movie sets where he couldn't spit that he wound up swallowing his spit.
00:58:32.000 So he got used to chewing and then swallowing it.
00:58:35.000 I got it spread out all over my lower gum.
00:58:38.000 Yeah, you got to use your tongue and ball it together.
00:58:42.000 There you go.
00:58:43.000 Now, so I'm not addicted to chew.
00:58:45.000 I can go weeks.
00:58:46.000 I'm not addicted to pot either.
00:58:47.000 Yeah, I can go weeks without it.
00:58:48.000 I'm not addicted to pussy.
00:58:49.000 No, so I don't have an addictive personality at all.
00:58:55.000 No, literally, I mean, I usually just chew when I'm on the boat and out, and I don't know, whenever I drink.
00:59:01.000 I chew when I drink.
00:59:03.000 This is like a cigar times five.
00:59:05.000 Oh yeah, you're gonna get buzzing.
00:59:07.000 Yeah, now I get it.
00:59:10.000 It's just fun.
00:59:10.000 I don't know.
00:59:11.000 It's probably bad.
00:59:12.000 It's interesting.
00:59:13.000 Probably a terrible role model move.
00:59:14.000 Was it bad for you?
00:59:15.000 Oh, it says right here, certain general warning, great for you.
00:59:19.000 I don't know why they put that on the can, but...
00:59:22.000 I feel like all the people who get cancer from this are pussies.
00:59:24.000 Is that right?
00:59:25.000 No?
00:59:30.000 There's another thing you're not supposed to say.
00:59:32.000 Will Copenhagen sponsor you when the UFC let them?
00:59:34.000 They might now.
00:59:34.000 Shit.
00:59:35.000 Will the UFC let them?
00:59:37.000 Why wouldn't they?
00:59:38.000 I don't see why...
00:59:40.000 Maybe because it's tobacco, but...
00:59:42.000 But what about alcohol?
00:59:43.000 Alcohol kills a lot of people.
00:59:45.000 That they don't talk about, sure, but Bud Light and Anheuser-Busch is a giant sponsor of the UFC, so...
00:59:50.000 Yeah.
00:59:51.000 Yeah, I don't see why they wouldn't.
00:59:53.000 I don't know.
00:59:53.000 Maybe you'll see Copenhagen right in the middle of the octagon.
00:59:56.000 Yeah.
00:59:57.000 People get so mad.
00:59:59.000 People already get mad.
01:00:00.000 I think it's hilarious that people get mad that Nate Diaz was smoking a vape pen.
01:00:04.000 After his fight, Mike, you just watched him get punched in the fucking head for 25 minutes, and you think it's bad that he's smoking a vape pen.
01:00:15.000 You want to hear the problem with it, though?
01:00:17.000 What's the problem?
01:00:18.000 Well, there's no problem, but USADA can test up to 42 hours after we fight, right?
01:00:22.000 So it might be a bad call on him, just because...
01:00:25.000 Right.
01:00:27.000 Only that would be the only bad downfall, I think.
01:00:29.000 I mean, especially doing it publicly, he could probably get tested immediately right after.
01:00:33.000 I don't know.
01:00:33.000 The thing is, the one he was taking was CBD oil, which is not psychoactive.
01:00:38.000 Which I'm a totally, totally fan of.
01:00:41.000 That's all I take.
01:00:42.000 Do you take CBD oil?
01:00:43.000 All the time.
01:00:43.000 I put the patches, I use the rub.
01:00:45.000 Yeah, because there's no hallucinogenic effects.
01:00:47.000 You just get the medicinal side of the marijuana.
01:00:49.000 Right.
01:00:50.000 So, yeah, whenever I go to Colorado, I load up on the CBD oils and I use them all the time for my knees and my elbows.
01:00:56.000 Yeah, I've got some shit that you can use in the bath, man.
01:00:58.000 I have some ointment that you put on your body.
01:01:00.000 Some bath salts?
01:01:00.000 Yeah, it's bath.
01:01:01.000 But it's like bath salts, for real.
01:01:05.000 What is this?
01:01:06.000 Look at the size of that joint.
01:01:08.000 Yeah.
01:01:09.000 Parties with Snoop and the biggest joint ever.
01:01:11.000 That is not the biggest joint ever.
01:01:13.000 That is propaganda.
01:01:13.000 I've seen the biggest joint ever.
01:01:15.000 It's far bigger than that.
01:01:16.000 I'm a big supporter of both those gentlemen, but I don't like lying.
01:01:20.000 That's a pretty big joint.
01:01:21.000 That would floor me.
01:01:21.000 That's not the biggest joint ever.
01:01:25.000 Look, in this Onnit box right here.
01:01:27.000 I know.
01:01:27.000 I was in there creeping on it earlier.
01:01:28.000 Oh, look.
01:01:28.000 Weed.
01:01:29.000 How weird.
01:01:30.000 So now you're smoking, chewing, and drinking.
01:01:34.000 I'm just curious to see what happens when you combine the two of them together.
01:01:36.000 The three of them.
01:01:37.000 The three of them.
01:01:38.000 I'm a fucking American.
01:01:39.000 I'm a grown man.
01:01:41.000 I'm middle-aged.
01:01:42.000 I have children.
01:01:43.000 I have a wife.
01:01:44.000 I pay taxes.
01:01:46.000 I've got a lot of good things on my side.
01:01:49.000 I'm telling you.
01:01:49.000 And you changed lives, man.
01:01:51.000 The people that listen to this, I mean, this might be a terrible episode for people to model their...
01:01:59.000 Life after, but typically you talk about good health and eating correctly and just people that sit around and do nothing with their lives, you know, just getting up on a Sunday and going for a hike and getting out there, you know, you talk about all these things, so they enjoy it.
01:02:16.000 I get messages every day from people that lost 100 pounds, people that are feeling healthy.
01:02:20.000 The problem is we're dealing with propaganda.
01:02:22.000 And you could do one of two things.
01:02:24.000 You could either just say, well, you know, this is...
01:02:27.000 I think I swallowed all that tobacco.
01:02:30.000 Yeah, it's all gone.
01:02:31.000 Oh, shit.
01:02:32.000 That's gross.
01:02:32.000 Yeah.
01:02:33.000 I was wondering why I'm so hot.
01:02:35.000 You got a tobacco on it?
01:02:36.000 Look, it's gone.
01:02:36.000 No, you swallowed it.
01:02:37.000 I don't have it.
01:02:38.000 Oh, you swallowed it?
01:02:39.000 Yeah, I swallowed it.
01:02:40.000 Attaboy.
01:02:40.000 I don't know what I'm doing.
01:02:41.000 That's...
01:02:44.000 All right.
01:02:45.000 Chew and drink and swallow.
01:02:46.000 All right.
01:02:47.000 We're fine.
01:02:47.000 Eating pussy and kicking ass.
01:02:48.000 Yeah, kicking pussy and kicking ass.
01:02:50.000 What happens when you swallow it?
01:02:51.000 New rules.
01:02:52.000 Jamie pulls up something immediately.
01:02:54.000 New rules enforced by the Food and Drug Administration will prevent cigarette and smokeless tobacco sponsorships in sporting events.
01:03:01.000 That's smokeless tobacco, though.
01:03:02.000 I think that's the vape pens.
01:03:04.000 Is that talking about chewing tobacco?
01:03:05.000 I think it's all of it.
01:03:07.000 That's chewing tobacco.
01:03:08.000 I swallowed it.
01:03:09.000 This was a couple years ago.
01:03:10.000 This was like 2010. I can't find it.
01:03:12.000 Yeah, it's gone.
01:03:13.000 It's gone.
01:03:13.000 You'll be alright.
01:03:14.000 If you don't throw up, now you're fine.
01:03:16.000 You're going to be alright.
01:03:17.000 I've got a serious head rush though.
01:03:19.000 Yeah, I bet.
01:03:20.000 This is good.
01:03:20.000 I'm enjoying this.
01:03:21.000 I might incorporate this in my diet.
01:03:24.000 What if we start selling Onnit tobacco pills?
01:03:28.000 They'd be like snus packets that you put in a little packet.
01:03:31.000 Well, that's one thing that you do get when you smoke a cigar.
01:03:33.000 You get this weird kind of different kind of high.
01:03:35.000 Yeah, absolutely.
01:03:36.000 You know, weird kind of head rush, silly, happy high.
01:03:40.000 You know?
01:03:40.000 I didn't spit once.
01:03:42.000 I never spit.
01:03:43.000 I just want to swallow it.
01:03:46.000 I love it.
01:03:47.000 That might be the best way to go.
01:03:49.000 You want some more of this?
01:03:50.000 Fucking A, Rowan.
01:03:51.000 Here's the thing.
01:03:52.000 We're here for a hundred years if we're lucky.
01:03:56.000 Lucky.
01:03:56.000 And along the way, we're having to deal with decades and decades of propaganda, which are lies.
01:04:03.000 It's just lies.
01:04:04.000 We're dealing with lies by all these different people that profited off of...
01:04:09.000 Demonization of marijuana and having people think that there's something bad about consuming these psychedelic drugs.
01:04:15.000 These things have made me more sensitive.
01:04:18.000 They made me nicer.
01:04:19.000 They made me more aware of my impact on the people that are in my life.
01:04:24.000 More kind and more appreciative of the people that are in my life.
01:04:27.000 More appreciative and more thankful for all the lucky things that have happened to me.
01:04:32.000 All the fortune that I've had to meet.
01:04:34.000 Good dudes like you and Jamie and and to be able to do something like this podcast when I I smoke weed sometimes You know what I think I think how fortunate I am and I think I think how much I love my children I think about how much I love my friends I caught my Joey Diaz will call me up high in the middle of the day at any given moment I'm just gonna tell you I love you dog.
01:04:54.000 I fucking love you.
01:04:55.000 I know he's high as fuck I love you right now.
01:04:57.000 I'm so high I think I'm not even on this planet I'm calling you from Jupiter But these are not bad things, folks.
01:05:04.000 They're not bad things, you know?
01:05:06.000 You know, when you see Nate Diaz smoking a little weed, he should be able to smoke a fucking joint.
01:05:11.000 He should be at that press conference.
01:05:12.000 They should have one of those oxygen things which sucks the air out.
01:05:16.000 Sure.
01:05:16.000 A little vent right above him.
01:05:18.000 Let him smoke a joint.
01:05:19.000 He just fought for millions of people, you know?
01:05:23.000 That's what I think, cowboy.
01:05:24.000 I'm with you, man.
01:05:25.000 I'm totally...
01:05:26.000 This is the part where Budweiser cancels us.
01:05:28.000 They're like, we're done.
01:05:29.000 We're done.
01:05:30.000 We're done with this.
01:05:30.000 You're out of here.
01:05:32.000 Well...
01:05:32.000 Sponsorships are hard, man.
01:05:34.000 I understand.
01:05:35.000 I understand it from their perspective.
01:05:37.000 You know, it's hard because you're kind of outsourcing credibility, right?
01:05:40.000 This is how a friend of mine, my friend Jason Hairston, he owns this company called Kuyu, which is a big-time...
01:05:47.000 A hunting apparel company.
01:05:48.000 Sure.
01:05:49.000 And they've been in here before because they're fascinating guys.
01:05:51.000 He's a super smart, genius dude who makes the best clothes for mountaineering and for hunting.
01:05:58.000 And he does it because it's his passion, that's what he likes to do.
01:06:00.000 So this guy goes to Japan, finds all the best fabrics.
01:06:04.000 And we were talking about, I don't know if you know about what's going on with Under Armour.
01:06:07.000 Did you see that thing where that dude killed a bear with a spear?
01:06:09.000 Fuck yeah.
01:06:10.000 Yeah.
01:06:11.000 See, that's how you feel.
01:06:13.000 And he killed a bear with a spear and a bunch of people got mad and a bunch of people protested, which is really ironic because...
01:06:19.000 Well, I think if you're going to kill a bear, any predator, I'm not a predator hunter, but if you're going to kill a predator, fucking get down and dirty with it.
01:06:26.000 Well, he got down and dirty, 100%.
01:06:28.000 You had to be, what, five feet from it with a spear?
01:06:31.000 I think he was, well, he's a huge dude.
01:06:33.000 His name's Josh Bomar.
01:06:34.000 I'll give him a shout out.
01:06:36.000 And this is what happened.
01:06:37.000 Josh Bomar killed this bear with a spear, and they put the video online.
01:06:41.000 Like, did he tree it first, or?
01:06:42.000 No, no, no, no.
01:06:43.000 It was at a bait site in Alberta.
01:06:45.000 He was there the week before I was there.
01:06:46.000 I was there hunting the week afterwards.
01:06:47.000 Okay.
01:06:48.000 And he got within 16 feet of this bear, and maybe 16 yards.
01:06:52.000 He got close as fuck to this bear.
01:06:55.000 But he is like a competitive javelin thrower.
01:06:57.000 He's a huge dude.
01:06:58.000 He's a bodybuilder.
01:06:59.000 Sure.
01:07:00.000 He chucks his spear, hits the bear, the bear runs 60 yards and dies.
01:07:04.000 Okay, but there's a video of it and the bear's guts are hanging out.
01:07:06.000 You know, it's like hunting scenes are graphic.
01:07:09.000 Just like, you know, everybody likes to have those five guys' burgers, but nobody wants to go to the fucking slaughterhouse and watch them get hit in the head with a piston and gutted and hung by their ankles and twitched and spraying all over the place.
01:07:19.000 But that's the reality of the world we're living in, right?
01:07:22.000 Sure.
01:07:22.000 I'm not 100% saying that...
01:07:25.000 I don't think putting the video up is a good idea.
01:07:27.000 Because if you're going to put a video like that up, you've got to explain for hours your position on a whole lot of things before anybody's going to accept that video.
01:07:37.000 Anyway, Under Armour, which they sponsored his wife, they canceled her sponsorship because she was filming the hunt.
01:07:45.000 And then they're getting this huge backlash from all of these hunters who were like, well, this is a legal hunt because it was legal to do that in Alberta.
01:07:53.000 And everybody always says, like, if they talk about hunters, ah, you pussy, you think you're a fucking man, go kill him with a spear.
01:07:58.000 Yeah, or a knife.
01:07:59.000 This guy did it!
01:08:00.000 He fucking killed a seven-foot bear with a spear.
01:08:04.000 I wouldn't do it.
01:08:06.000 There's a couple problems with it as far as a regular person.
01:08:09.000 First of all, you gotta be strong as fuck to throw a spear hard enough to kill a bear.
01:08:14.000 Or if you're not, you gotta be close enough.
01:08:16.000 Yeah.
01:08:17.000 A couple of those things, those are both huge factors.
01:08:20.000 You're taking a tremendous risk doing something like that.
01:08:22.000 So it gets out of the realm, in a lot of people's eyes, of hunting for meat, which is really the only thing that people respect.
01:08:30.000 If the average person doesn't hunt, they do not respect trophy animals.
01:08:33.000 Like trophy hunting, rather.
01:08:34.000 If you say, oh, I want a zebra rug, so I'm going to go shoot a zebra, people will get fucking pissed at you.
01:08:40.000 I've always wanted to see a stuffed giraffe in my backyard.
01:08:43.000 People will get fucking really mad at you if you kill an animal for its skin.
01:08:47.000 But if you kill an animal for the sole purpose of eating it and you do it in an ethical way, People, they go, okay, I get it because I eat meat myself and I buy fish from the store.
01:08:57.000 And there's 95% of the planet does that.
01:09:00.000 But this guy who got it, there's this huge controversy with Under Armour.
01:09:04.000 And one of the things that Jason Harrison from Kuyu said, he goes...
01:09:07.000 We don't outsource our credibility.
01:09:09.000 Our company is dependent upon us.
01:09:12.000 We don't have any athletes that we sponsor.
01:09:15.000 There's no one out there that represents our brand that we have to make sure you don't say this, don't say that.
01:09:20.000 All they do is just make great shit.
01:09:22.000 And I think that's the thing about a company like Budweiser.
01:09:24.000 I love that a company like Budweiser gets behind a guy like you.
01:09:28.000 But they gotta accept you for you.
01:09:31.000 They gotta accept you for you.
01:09:33.000 Dirty words and all.
01:09:35.000 Dirty words and all.
01:09:37.000 Alright, so we all know you're a meat eater.
01:09:41.000 What would your last meal, your death row meal of choice be?
01:09:45.000 Elk and jalapenos.
01:09:47.000 Elk and jalapenos.
01:09:47.000 That's how I do it.
01:09:48.000 I'm so fucking pissed I missed out on that.
01:09:50.000 Dude, tell me the next time you're here, I'll have you over the house, I'll cook for you.
01:09:54.000 I seen you cooking it last night.
01:09:56.000 I know you're only here for a short time.
01:09:58.000 Next time, my friend, let's plan this out.
01:09:59.000 Let's train.
01:10:00.000 Let's get together.
01:10:01.000 Let's get a little workout in.
01:10:02.000 I'll grill for you.
01:10:04.000 I'll bring some Americans.
01:10:06.000 We can do whatever you want.
01:10:07.000 Yeah, we can roll.
01:10:08.000 We do whatever you want.
01:10:09.000 I want to see how you set up some of your shit, too.
01:10:13.000 I want to watch.
01:10:13.000 Because you know what I really love that you do, man?
01:10:15.000 That knee to the body.
01:10:16.000 That check knee to the body.
01:10:18.000 God damn, you do that better than anybody in the sport.
01:10:20.000 And you do it out of nowhere.
01:10:22.000 You have a beautiful way of delivering that when you don't know it's coming.
01:10:26.000 I think that's a really...
01:10:28.000 I mean, there's a lot of guys that do it.
01:10:29.000 Don't get me wrong.
01:10:30.000 But I think that you probably do it as good as anybody in MMA right now.
01:10:35.000 I'd like to see how you set that up.
01:10:37.000 I'd like to talk to you about that shit.
01:10:38.000 Anytime, yeah.
01:10:40.000 I just got my black belt.
01:10:40.000 I'm pretty excited about that.
01:10:41.000 I know!
01:10:42.000 Jiu-jitsu!
01:10:43.000 Donald Saron, long time come.
01:10:44.000 Long time come.
01:10:46.000 He's been overtrained 15 years.
01:10:47.000 Just putting on the gi, I don't get into it that much.
01:10:50.000 Well, the gi's problematic.
01:10:53.000 The gi's problematic.
01:10:54.000 It was cool.
01:10:54.000 It totally caught me off guard and I had no idea it was coming.
01:10:56.000 So I was like, oh wow, cool.
01:10:58.000 People get so hung up on that goddamn gi.
01:11:00.000 I'm a big fan of the gi.
01:11:01.000 I have a black belt in the gi.
01:11:03.000 I don't think there's anything wrong with the gi.
01:11:04.000 But I think people are too fucking connected to an article of clothing.
01:11:08.000 And they're doing it for one reason.
01:11:10.000 One reason.
01:11:11.000 This is the only reason.
01:11:12.000 Other than tradition.
01:11:14.000 Because the guys with the gi know how to use that fucking gi.
01:11:17.000 They know how to hold those collars.
01:11:19.000 They know how to grab those sleeves.
01:11:20.000 They know how to control your ass in a way they cannot do when you're slippery.
01:11:24.000 So if you guys go in there MMA style, and you're wearing shorts, and he's wearing shorts, it is a completely different ballgame.
01:11:30.000 Oh, yeah.
01:11:30.000 And no one wants to admit that.
01:11:32.000 Well, I do.
01:11:32.000 Every time I go rolling a gi, I say, hey, man, if you want to...
01:11:35.000 Take a collar choke, go ahead.
01:11:36.000 You can have it.
01:11:37.000 I don't even know how to defend himself.
01:11:39.000 If you want to win by that, go ahead.
01:11:41.000 Go ahead, Ezekiel the shit out of me.
01:11:42.000 Yeah, whatever you want to do.
01:11:43.000 Listen, it's great if you get in a fight with a dude with a winter coat.
01:11:46.000 You know?
01:11:47.000 Like, Jimmy Pedro is probably the last guy in the world you'd want to get in a fight with if you have a winter coat.
01:11:52.000 You know, Olympic gold medalist, judo dude's gonna fucking drop you on your head.
01:11:55.000 That's the worst, but...
01:11:57.000 So, funny story.
01:11:57.000 You talk about Olympic gold medal judo.
01:12:00.000 My best friend Eric Bonekamp and I, this is before I started fighting, got into a street fight down in Colorado Springs.
01:12:05.000 Oh, Jesus.
01:12:05.000 And the guy had his judo jacket on, right?
01:12:08.000 And we were like, yeah, whatever, fucking...
01:12:11.000 We started a fight with him.
01:12:12.000 This motherfucker, I don't know, is it the Uchimata when they throw you?
01:12:16.000 There's a couple of those.
01:12:17.000 Holy shit!
01:12:18.000 He threw my buddy through the fucking plate glass window.
01:12:21.000 Oh, shit!
01:12:22.000 Did the mic drop and walked off.
01:12:24.000 And I just had to stand there like, holy fuck.
01:12:26.000 He threw them through a plate glass window?
01:12:29.000 Downtown Colorado Springs, Colorado.
01:12:32.000 We were down in the bar district.
01:12:34.000 The fight started.
01:12:36.000 The dude just was like, whatever.
01:12:37.000 My buddy came at him.
01:12:38.000 He just grabbed me and fucking threw him through the window.
01:12:40.000 And I was like, you win.
01:12:42.000 Well, you know, one of the things that I recognize really early on in MMA is there's certain guys, there's just giant levels of shit, right?
01:12:49.000 Like we're seeing that with Damian Maia, right?
01:12:52.000 We saw that in Damian Maia fight with Carlos Cana.
01:12:54.000 There's levels of this jujitsu.
01:12:56.000 And Damian Maia's got that...
01:12:58.000 Hicks and Gracie style, just smoosh jujitsu.
01:13:02.000 And it's just perfect, technically.
01:13:04.000 Just perfect.
01:13:05.000 Everything he does is perfect.
01:13:06.000 Well, there's like, like when Kyle Parisian first fought in the UFC, I remember going, oh, okay.
01:13:12.000 I just haven't seen this level yet.
01:13:14.000 Right.
01:13:14.000 Like this motherfucker's tossing people.
01:13:17.000 He would get that, Kyle Parisian in his early days would get that overhook.
01:13:21.000 He would get that overhook and he would bump you and fucking send you flying.
01:13:25.000 And everybody went flying.
01:13:27.000 Karo threw everybody.
01:13:28.000 He came down to Jackson's, he threw me.
01:13:30.000 He throws everybody.
01:13:31.000 And talk about like a morale killer.
01:13:34.000 Yeah.
01:13:34.000 You get thrown in front of millions of people, you're like, oh fuck.
01:13:37.000 And he throws you perfect.
01:13:38.000 Yeah.
01:13:39.000 You know, he is Gene LaBelle, Gokar, Kovitchian, you know, it's like that whole fucking lineage of judo.
01:13:48.000 Is very strong.
01:13:49.000 That highest time grappling, that's very strong lineage of Judo.
01:13:54.000 They have strong Judo, man.
01:13:55.000 And you know, that's where Ronda came from.
01:13:57.000 She spent a lot of her time there as well.
01:13:59.000 Under Judo, like Judo Jean.
01:14:00.000 Judo Jean's like always at her fights, you know?
01:14:03.000 Is she coming back?
01:14:04.000 You gotta talk to her, brother.
01:14:05.000 I haven't talked to her.
01:14:06.000 I haven't either.
01:14:07.000 I don't have the direct mind to Rhonda.
01:14:09.000 I always feel weird when someone loses a fight.
01:14:12.000 If I reach out to them, I always feel weird.
01:14:16.000 I always feel like...
01:14:17.000 If I see someone in person...
01:14:21.000 Look, Joe, I'm four to one on you, buddy.
01:14:22.000 Give me another one, bro.
01:14:23.000 You just tip your motherfucking game up, brother.
01:14:26.000 Yeah, but I ate tobacco and smoked weed.
01:14:28.000 We're probably really close.
01:14:33.000 This one's done.
01:14:34.000 I'll move on to number three.
01:14:35.000 You're going in.
01:14:36.000 All right.
01:14:37.000 You see levels of everything in sport, and I think that's one of the things you're showing, man.
01:14:43.000 I think you're showing a level of kickboxing that's a very fucking...
01:14:47.000 You're hitting those kind of combinations, man.
01:14:49.000 Now I believe in my wrestling.
01:14:51.000 I think that's...
01:14:53.000 Big key in the Kote fight and in the Rick Story fight.
01:14:55.000 You took both those guys down.
01:14:57.000 And I think they were probably like, what?
01:14:59.000 Yeah, what the fuck?
01:15:00.000 But I mean, the confidence in my takedown defense is allowing me to really open up.
01:15:05.000 And believing in myself is really...
01:15:07.000 Like I said, when I reinvented myself, I just started...
01:15:10.000 Like when someone comes into the gym, I'm fucking you up.
01:15:13.000 When you come down to jazz, I'm beating your motherfucking ass.
01:15:15.000 I understand.
01:15:16.000 So it's just...
01:15:17.000 Except the fact that you're not sparring.
01:15:19.000 Yeah.
01:15:19.000 Yeah.
01:15:22.000 Back in the day.
01:15:24.000 You come in and we do MMA rounds, I'm fucking you up.
01:15:29.000 I just need to somehow figure out how do I translate that into fight night because so many emotions.
01:15:37.000 This last fight was the worst I've ever felt in my whole life.
01:15:39.000 I talked about that with Megan after the fight.
01:15:42.000 I had the worst headache and was legitimately sick all day before this last fight.
01:15:47.000 And, you know, Greg Jackson's like, cowboy, this is what you train for every day.
01:15:51.000 To beat somebody on your worst is what you have to be prepared for, you know?
01:15:58.000 Fuck, it was just warming up.
01:15:59.000 I didn't feel it.
01:16:00.000 It wasn't until we started walking out that I was like, find the motherfucking gear, let's go.
01:16:05.000 I had to get it.
01:16:08.000 I think there's a legit question that I asked you in the last podcast.
01:16:12.000 I said, have you ever talked to a mental coach?
01:16:15.000 Have you ever worked with a mental coach?
01:16:16.000 Yeah.
01:16:16.000 And you're like, fuck no.
01:16:17.000 I just go out there and kick some ass.
01:16:19.000 Eat pussy.
01:16:20.000 Eating pussy, kicking ass.
01:16:22.000 That's it.
01:16:23.000 Which I think is very admirable and it's fun.
01:16:26.000 But I think you're at this...
01:16:28.000 There's this crust of the elite of the elite right now.
01:16:33.000 And you're at that crust.
01:16:34.000 And I think in that top echelon, when you get up there with the best of the best...
01:16:41.000 I don't think there's any room for potential.
01:16:44.000 I think it all should be played out.
01:16:46.000 You should have realized your potential as much as possible by the time you got there.
01:16:51.000 And I think a factor in that is mindset.
01:16:54.000 And I don't think it's just being tough and going out there and kicking ass, because you've already got that down to a science.
01:17:00.000 That's you.
01:17:01.000 I think there are some strategies and there are also some tools that you can use in terms of mental management that keep you in the proper channels and don't allow your mind to wander.
01:17:13.000 So you don't have to bring your mind back and say, ah, don't think about that.
01:17:17.000 We're here for this.
01:17:18.000 This is what we came for.
01:17:19.000 You don't need that pep talk, okay?
01:17:20.000 Because you never go down that bad channel.
01:17:22.000 You're always staying in these positive channels, and the thoughts come in like they do with anybody.
01:17:27.000 Like when I meditate or when I get in the tank, people think you just go in there and you zen out.
01:17:31.000 No, I start thinking about stupid shit.
01:17:33.000 I start thinking about, God, I gotta clean my fucking office.
01:17:36.000 I'm such a slob.
01:17:37.000 You know, like little things.
01:17:39.000 You start thinking dumb shit.
01:17:40.000 I'm writing this down.
01:17:42.000 170. But then you take them back in.
01:17:43.000 And mental coach.
01:17:45.000 I'm gonna connect you to Vinnie Shorman.
01:17:47.000 Vinnie Shorman is a guy that works with Joe Schilling.
01:17:49.000 He works with Ian McCall.
01:17:52.000 I've done two sessions with him.
01:17:53.000 He's a hypnotist.
01:17:54.000 He's also a Muay Thai commentator and a coach and he knows his shit.
01:18:00.000 Especially when it comes to striking.
01:18:01.000 I think you would get along with him just because of that.
01:18:04.000 But he's got some really...
01:18:06.000 I've done two podcasts with him too.
01:18:07.000 You can listen to the podcast.
01:18:09.000 He makes some real legitimate points when it comes to understanding how the mind works, the tricks he can play on you, and how bad decisions from the past can fuck with you in terms of bad things sort of define you.
01:18:22.000 And you've got to figure out a way to alleviate yourself from any response...
01:18:27.000 Am I meaning with him...
01:18:29.000 Before or after the DMT trip?
01:18:32.000 Before.
01:18:32.000 Before.
01:18:32.000 We gotta get ready.
01:18:33.000 So we're gonna get ready?
01:18:34.000 We gotta get ready, dude.
01:18:35.000 You know, when those astronauts go into space, bro, they don't just show up.
01:18:44.000 Aubrey's the shaman.
01:18:45.000 He's the one who's gonna put on the whole thing.
01:18:47.000 He plays the music.
01:18:48.000 He plays these South American Icaros that were recorded by him in the jungle.
01:18:54.000 It goes deep.
01:18:55.000 Fuck.
01:18:56.000 It goes deep.
01:18:57.000 But what I think, I think, you know, and I think you're already coaching yourself by this, like reinventing yourself, right?
01:19:05.000 Right.
01:19:05.000 Re-evaluating your diet, starting to add supplementation, taking care of yourself better, approaching things in a more professional way, cutting out the sparring, working entirely on drilling, and you're seeing all these results.
01:19:15.000 Choosing to go to 170 and be healthier when you're fighting, you're seeing all these results.
01:19:19.000 All these results are like this gravitation towards improvement.
01:19:23.000 Improvement and advancement.
01:19:24.000 And I think that there's a thing that men have, and I'm guilty of it, we all are, where we don't want help.
01:19:30.000 That's why women are always like, men don't want directions.
01:19:32.000 Directions, yeah.
01:19:32.000 I'm like, I know where I'm going.
01:19:34.000 Don't worry about it.
01:19:35.000 I mean, it's classic.
01:19:36.000 My wife does it all the time.
01:19:37.000 I know where I'm going.
01:19:38.000 Sometimes I'm not even exactly sure.
01:19:40.000 Sure.
01:19:40.000 But what I know is I don't want to hear her tell me where I'm going.
01:19:43.000 Because if I was just driving on my own, I'd figure it out.
01:19:45.000 Like, it would be no problem.
01:19:46.000 But when someone doesn't think, it's like men have a real issue With being coached on things that could be potentially thought of as weaknesses.
01:19:58.000 Sure.
01:19:59.000 Like men don't want to go to like a couple's counseling and have some other dude tell you how to communicate better with your woman or your man, you know, whatever you're into.
01:20:07.000 Or your man.
01:20:08.000 Gay guys go to counseling.
01:20:09.000 We can't go down that path.
01:20:11.000 That's...
01:20:11.000 Yeah, Budweiser gets angry.
01:20:13.000 America!
01:20:13.000 Pull it up!
01:20:14.000 America!
01:20:15.000 I gotta pee because I drink too much America.
01:20:16.000 Kick an ass.
01:20:17.000 Go ahead.
01:20:17.000 Go ahead.
01:20:19.000 I'm glad you left.
01:20:20.000 I don't know what the fuck I was saying.
01:20:22.000 I was going on about something completely preposterous.
01:20:25.000 What was I saying?
01:20:28.000 Oh.
01:20:29.000 Men do have a problem, a lot of us do, with thinking that you are your mistakes, you are your faults, and you are your weaknesses.
01:20:40.000 So they get branded into your system.
01:20:44.000 And once these things get branded into your system, they're really difficult to shake.
01:20:48.000 Because you sort of define yourself not by the lessons you've learned from those experiences and you being this conscious entity that is existing right now, not in a state of mistakes and of errors, but of life.
01:21:00.000 You're living right now with information based on your past.
01:21:03.000 And you can go forward from that and be really positive and go, wow, I'm glad I went through all those awful things because I know that I could be a real twat or I could be really retarded or I could be really foolish or impulsive and I could mess my whole life up.
01:21:16.000 But I am this guy right now.
01:21:19.000 If you don't, like, learn that, then you can go through this life going, hey, I don't give a fuck.
01:21:24.000 This is me.
01:21:25.000 This is who I am.
01:21:26.000 And I don't want any coaching.
01:21:28.000 I don't want any advice.
01:21:29.000 But there's a bunch of other people that have gone through similar experiences.
01:21:32.000 And you can call them coaches or just call them human beings with information.
01:21:36.000 And there's people that have gone through a bunch of experiences.
01:21:39.000 That are real similar to the ones that you're gonna go through or I'm gonna go through and these people were talking about learning from other men that like learning shit about like weaknesses like emotions and about like Fears and and just your own mortality,
01:21:55.000 you know all those things are real issues Men don't like learning from other men.
01:22:00.000 So you're like I don't need that shit, you know, right?
01:22:05.000 You know what I'm talking about?
01:22:05.000 I know what you're talking about.
01:22:06.000 Gotta get back in the group, bro.
01:22:08.000 You took the leak.
01:22:08.000 You reset.
01:22:09.000 We're resetting.
01:22:11.000 In other news, yesterday I was outfitted for a new movie I'm doing, a western.
01:22:15.000 You're doing a western?
01:22:16.000 How weird.
01:22:17.000 It's actually not a movie.
01:22:18.000 It's a Netflix series.
01:22:20.000 I got six episodes.
01:22:22.000 Holy shit.
01:22:22.000 Cool, right?
01:22:23.000 That's gigantic.
01:22:24.000 I gotta do cowboy shit.
01:22:25.000 What is it?
01:22:26.000 It's called Godless.
01:22:28.000 It's a...
01:22:29.000 I'm part of a gang.
01:22:30.000 A train robbery gang.
01:22:32.000 Holy shit.
01:22:33.000 I know.
01:22:34.000 I'm fucking pumped, man.
01:22:34.000 I'm excited.
01:22:35.000 Wow.
01:22:36.000 That's amazing.
01:22:37.000 I know.
01:22:37.000 I was starting on the 12th.
01:22:39.000 Have you ever acted before?
01:22:40.000 Well, I did Always Sunny in Philadelphia, but I played me.
01:22:43.000 Here's what I think.
01:22:44.000 I think you're going to kill it right out of the box, and we're going to show the world how fucking easy acting is.
01:22:49.000 Goddamn people think that shit is hard.
01:22:51.000 And I'm not a good actor, by the way.
01:22:53.000 I should just say that right off the bat.
01:22:54.000 But I know a lot of people can go right from other shit and become actors.
01:22:59.000 Yeah, I mean, I'm more excited about fucking shooting guns and riding horses and shit.
01:23:05.000 I bet you are.
01:23:07.000 You should be.
01:23:08.000 That's real.
01:23:09.000 Yeah, I mean...
01:23:09.000 Yeah, you don't want to get too pumped up about fake shit.
01:23:12.000 I'm about to do some fake shit.
01:23:13.000 Oh, dude, you get to wear makeup?
01:23:15.000 What kind of...
01:23:16.000 So I got this beard, and they tell me, they tell me, we need you to grow your beard, all your hair out.
01:23:21.000 And I said, well, this is a little bit of a problem up top here, but...
01:23:27.000 I'll try.
01:23:28.000 They want you to grow your hair long?
01:23:29.000 Give me a wig like Kevin Costner.
01:23:31.000 They said wigs are uncomfortable, but they want a grunge look out of this.
01:23:36.000 I can do grunge.
01:23:37.000 Can't you just be a cowboy with a shaved head?
01:23:40.000 Didn't they have buzz cuts back then?
01:23:41.000 I mean, where would you buzz your head?
01:23:44.000 You'd shave it all and you'd let it grow back a little bit.
01:23:46.000 No, one of them nice straight razors.
01:23:48.000 They use those westerdy type places that people go to.
01:23:51.000 So while we're raping and pillaging across the countryside, I'm just going to campfire lit mirror cut.
01:23:58.000 Shit!
01:23:59.000 Shit!
01:24:00.000 That's what they would do.
01:24:01.000 And they would sharpen it with a strop.
01:24:03.000 They sharpen it with that leather thing.
01:24:05.000 I never understood that.
01:24:06.000 How the fuck does leather sharpen a razor blade?
01:24:09.000 Do you understand?
01:24:10.000 I do not.
01:24:10.000 I buy a new razor every time.
01:24:12.000 Here's a rabbit hole that I've gone down recently.
01:24:14.000 I've been going on these Instagram pages of custom knife makers.
01:24:19.000 Are you the person that likes all those?
01:24:21.000 Is that why I keep coming up on my like feed?
01:24:24.000 I love that shit.
01:24:26.000 Who likes all these big juicy butt girls on all these fucking knives?
01:24:31.000 This guy.
01:24:32.000 This guy.
01:24:33.000 These guys, well, I'm sure there's some girls out there too, but I've only followed guys.
01:24:38.000 They have their own forging facilities.
01:24:42.000 And they make the sheaves and everything.
01:24:43.000 They're clanging the fucking metal and putting in the fire and making handmade knives and shit.
01:24:48.000 Dude, I'm obsessed with this.
01:24:49.000 You forced me to creep just because they're on the...
01:24:52.000 whatever that...
01:24:56.000 Microscope.
01:24:56.000 What is that fucking thing called?
01:24:58.000 The search.
01:24:58.000 The search page.
01:25:01.000 It might be because we follow each other and I'm going to those sites all the time.
01:25:04.000 I'm just fascinated by it, man.
01:25:07.000 I don't know what my original point was.
01:25:09.000 You're talking about cool shit.
01:25:11.000 A lot of people making cool shit out there, but that's the rabbit hole I've gone down is homemade knives.
01:25:16.000 And how crazy is it that someone is good at making that and how good you are at speaking Through people's souls.
01:25:22.000 See, but this is easy.
01:25:23.000 This is just talking.
01:25:24.000 No, it's not, though.
01:25:25.000 It's not easy.
01:25:26.000 What you do is not easy.
01:25:28.000 I couldn't just go get someone out the street, put them here, and be like, alright, I need you to interview somebody for three to five hours, and keep it entertaining, and have no dead time, and know what the fuck you're talking about.
01:25:38.000 See, that's where you're wrong.
01:25:39.000 I don't not know what the fuck I'm talking about.
01:25:41.000 I don't remember what I was talking about when you were taking a leak.
01:25:44.000 Your DMT speech was...
01:25:46.000 You had me wrapping up my arm ready for a mainline drag, so I'm ready for it.
01:25:50.000 I've given that one before.
01:25:51.000 I know that one real good.
01:25:52.000 It's like asking you to throw a jab.
01:25:54.000 You could be hammered when you throw that jab.
01:25:55.000 How fucking mad does that piss you off when you're at the shows?
01:25:57.000 I've been to a lot of your shows, and everyone's always like, DMT. When you ask people what you want to talk about, they're always like, DMT. You're like, fuck you, dude.
01:26:05.000 I just tell them, go on YouTube.
01:26:06.000 Go on YouTube.
01:26:07.000 I can't talk about it anymore.
01:26:08.000 And there's nothing funny I can say about it either.
01:26:10.000 And it's definitely not something you can say in front of a giant crowd of people where they're going to understand that.
01:26:14.000 I tried to explain.
01:26:15.000 Doug Stanhope had a whole bit once, because I got him high on DMT and blew his mind, and he went and did a whole bit about me and him doing DMT in my house.
01:26:24.000 I thought he was dead.
01:26:25.000 He was moaning and foaming, like legitimately foaming at the mouth.
01:26:28.000 He was lying down going...
01:26:31.000 For 15 minutes?
01:26:32.000 No, it was a solid three of moaning with a point where I'm going, oh boy.
01:26:39.000 Maybe he was just purging.
01:26:40.000 Well, I just started thinking, what did I do?
01:26:42.000 Like, I made Doug do what I do, right?
01:26:44.000 So I'm thinking, eh, he'll be fine.
01:26:45.000 That's why I'm not doing what you do.
01:26:46.000 You say three giant hits.
01:26:49.000 I'm going to do one and a half.
01:26:50.000 Here's my point.
01:26:51.000 You're fucking healthy.
01:26:53.000 Doug Stanhope smokes two packs of cigarettes a day.
01:26:56.000 He gets up, starts drinking, stops when he falls asleep, starts when he wakes up again.
01:27:01.000 It matters of your physical...
01:27:04.000 Well, I just think what was going on, and it wasn't bad for him.
01:27:08.000 He came back, he was fine.
01:27:09.000 It's a natural drug that is in the human body.
01:27:12.000 You don't overdose from it.
01:27:14.000 No one's ever died from smoking DMT. How many people have done DMT? Not a lot.
01:27:18.000 More now than before.
01:27:21.000 Yeah, because you're pumping.
01:27:22.000 We don't have a very big audience of people we can pull through.
01:27:25.000 Like, yeah, you've definitely OD'd on LSD or on...
01:27:30.000 Alcohol.
01:27:31.000 This is what I think without being irresponsible.
01:27:33.000 I think that if you have any psychological issues, you probably shouldn't do anything that perturbs your state, your psychological state.
01:27:40.000 Yeah, so I should not do it.
01:27:41.000 I'm fucking crazy.
01:27:43.000 You're fine!
01:27:43.000 Bat shit crazy.
01:27:45.000 But I think that saying that, just saying that, getting that out of the way, it could benefit a whole lot of people.
01:27:51.000 There's a whole lot of people that could benefit from it.
01:27:53.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:27:55.000 I'm in.
01:27:56.000 I'm going in.
01:27:57.000 There's a way to do it through kundalini yoga, apparently.
01:28:00.000 Do you know Denny Propokos?
01:28:02.000 He's one of Eddie Bravo's black belts.
01:28:04.000 Maybe you've seen him with me a bunch of times.
01:28:05.000 He works for the UFC sometimes.
01:28:07.000 He kind of does what Eddie used to do, where he recognizes...
01:28:12.000 What they do is they're filming certain positions, like when Damien Maia finished Carlos Condit, it would either be Mark Della Grate, or when Della Grate's out, Denny will fill in the place.
01:28:23.000 So he understands the transitions, so he'll pull that clip up for the replays.
01:28:27.000 And Denny is a big proponent of Kundalini Yoga, and he's also done DMT. And when he does Kundalini, he can achieve those states.
01:28:37.000 How?
01:28:38.000 I don't know.
01:28:39.000 I don't understand kundalini.
01:28:40.000 I've never done it.
01:28:41.000 What the fuck does kundalini even mean?
01:28:43.000 Kundalini is a series of exercises and meditations and yoga that are widely purported to achieve psychedelic states.
01:28:52.000 There's other ways to do it, too.
01:28:53.000 There's holotropic breathing.
01:28:55.000 There's a psychedelic breathing method that you can do.
01:28:58.000 See, DMT is produced by the human body.
01:29:02.000 So you've just got to get your body to make it.
01:29:05.000 Accesses somehow.
01:29:06.000 Yeah, there's ways that people have figured out where you can stimulate your body's production of this natural psychedelic chemical.
01:29:12.000 So not just through taking it exogenously, like smoking it or drinking it when you're taking ayahuasca, but to make your own body produce it.
01:29:21.000 And the reason behind it is for near-death experience, right?
01:29:25.000 To make you feel okay?
01:29:26.000 I don't know what the reason behind it is.
01:29:28.000 I feel like I've experienced what you're talking about when I almost died.
01:29:32.000 Everything I was in the most pain I've ever been in, I tipped the gurney over, fucking threw up all this blood, and they put me back, and then all of a sudden this overwhelming feeling just overtook me, and everything was just okay.
01:29:44.000 I was okay to die.
01:29:45.000 It was the craziest feeling I've ever had.
01:29:48.000 I had no fear, and I had no worries in the world.
01:29:53.000 It was just like, okay.
01:29:55.000 Everything was just like a giant ease that lifted off me.
01:29:58.000 I've heard that before.
01:29:59.000 I haven't had that experience, but I've heard that before.
01:30:01.000 Well, don't try and die.
01:30:03.000 Yeah.
01:30:03.000 I have a friend who almost died in a car accident, and she said the same thing.
01:30:06.000 She said right after the car hit, and she got smashed by this car, slamming in, like they got t-boned.
01:30:13.000 She flew across the other side of the car and smashed into her friend.
01:30:18.000 And there was this immediate, like, feeling of peace.
01:30:22.000 Yeah.
01:30:22.000 Okay.
01:30:23.000 This immediate feeling of, like, everything's gonna be alright.
01:30:24.000 And this weird love sensation.
01:30:27.000 I didn't see any geographic shapes telling me.
01:30:30.000 Well, because you were knocking on the door, son.
01:30:32.000 You gotta go inside.
01:30:32.000 I didn't get it.
01:30:33.000 I did one more rip and I'd have been good.
01:30:35.000 Well, that's what the worry is.
01:30:38.000 That when you're doing DMT, what you're seeing is the afterlife.
01:30:41.000 You're seeing that there is some place that the soul goes.
01:30:44.000 And that the soul is not just a concept that's based in mysticism and lies and in fantasies.
01:30:50.000 Mysticism and lies.
01:30:51.000 Well, there's a lot of people that look at things that you can't prove.
01:30:54.000 Absolutely.
01:30:55.000 It's faith.
01:30:55.000 That's a big word of faith.
01:30:57.000 Right.
01:30:57.000 Like, if you look at something like a soul, you can't prove it.
01:30:59.000 You're right.
01:31:00.000 You can't prove it.
01:31:01.000 Definitely.
01:31:01.000 We all agree on that.
01:31:02.000 But let's examine what the fuck it means to be a person.
01:31:05.000 We don't know what it means to be conscious.
01:31:08.000 There's all these ways we can define it and talk about it where it makes sense, but it does not make sense that you are looking through your eyes and living the life of Donald Cerrone.
01:31:17.000 And I'm looking through my eyes, and I'm living the life of Joe Rogan.
01:31:20.000 And we become pals, and we have stories, and we talk, and you say things with your mouth, and I kind of understand what you're saying, and I say things, and I hope you understand what I'm saying, and we laugh, we have a good time, we drink a few Budweiser.
01:31:32.000 It's like, this is a fucking bizarre state to be in.
01:31:34.000 Super bizarre.
01:31:35.000 Clinging to a circular ball like some gigantic huge pack of water and dirt and rock that's hurling through infinity.
01:31:45.000 This is strange.
01:31:46.000 With seven others.
01:31:47.000 It's so strange.
01:31:49.000 It's as strange as can be.
01:31:51.000 Life is way stranger or as strange as anything you're going to experience on DMT. You're just used to life.
01:31:57.000 I like life.
01:31:58.000 I like life too.
01:31:59.000 Life is awesome.
01:32:01.000 So let's talk about space.
01:32:03.000 Ha!
01:32:03.000 Let's go there.
01:32:04.000 Let's do it.
01:32:05.000 What the fuck is out there, man?
01:32:08.000 I mean...
01:32:09.000 Everything.
01:32:10.000 So I talked to BJ Penn.
01:32:11.000 He thinks the world is flat.
01:32:12.000 I understand this.
01:32:13.000 I've heard this.
01:32:14.000 How crazy is that, right?
01:32:16.000 He believes the world is flat and that when you take off in an airplane, you just do like a big...
01:32:22.000 You don't go around the world.
01:32:24.000 You just kind of do like a giant...
01:32:26.000 Here's the thing.
01:32:27.000 Why?
01:32:27.000 Why would anybody lie about that?
01:32:30.000 Where's the money in line about the earth being flat?
01:32:32.000 It's so stupid.
01:32:34.000 So stupid.
01:32:34.000 It's so stupid.
01:32:35.000 He thinks Columbus might have been onto something.
01:32:37.000 Listen, man, there's a bunch of people making YouTube videos, okay?
01:32:40.000 And these YouTube videos confuse the fuck out of people that don't understand physics, like you or me.
01:32:45.000 I don't understand physics.
01:32:47.000 Even physics or not, it comes down to when you sail around the world...
01:32:51.000 Yeah.
01:32:52.000 You go around the world.
01:32:53.000 Around the fucking world.
01:32:55.000 You follow GPS. You follow the map.
01:32:57.000 It's not like you're just gonna...
01:32:59.000 What, do you just hit a wall?
01:33:00.000 Every image shown by NASA is a composite of the Earth.
01:33:05.000 That's exactly what they say, right?
01:33:06.000 Shut the fuck up.
01:33:07.000 Look, you can go in the space station, you cunts.
01:33:10.000 You can see it.
01:33:11.000 Is everybody that's been to the space station lying?
01:33:14.000 Every Russian, every American, they're all a bunch of liars and you're a truth seeker.
01:33:19.000 Luminati, baby.
01:33:19.000 They're all Luminati.
01:33:20.000 Do you know how stupid that is to think that everyone has been faking every image of the Earth being round?
01:33:24.000 Oh, and coincidentally, the Earth is the only flat thing we've ever found in the fucking universe, because all the moons, all the planets, Jupiter, all that shit's round as fuck.
01:33:34.000 What's that?
01:33:34.000 These are tree stumps, by the way, according to the Flat Earth theory.
01:33:38.000 Every giant rock...
01:33:39.000 Okay, we're being trolled.
01:33:40.000 Dude, this is not real.
01:33:41.000 There's no way that's a tree stump.
01:33:43.000 How big would that tree be?
01:33:44.000 This is an elaborate 4chan host.
01:33:47.000 They're slowly trolling America.
01:33:50.000 The tree would have been that Pandora-sized tree.
01:33:53.000 Definitely makes sense.
01:33:54.000 Wow.
01:33:55.000 It's legit.
01:33:56.000 And what happened to it?
01:33:57.000 It got knocked, I don't know.
01:33:59.000 Not the dinosaurs.
01:34:00.000 Listen, the reality, the reality of Earth and space is crazy enough, you dumb cunts.
01:34:07.000 You don't have to fake conspiracies.
01:34:10.000 The reality of this whole thing is so fucking uber bizarre.
01:34:15.000 We're in a giant ball that's floating in the sky.
01:34:20.000 Above us is something a quarter the size of us.
01:34:23.000 It's floating in the sky.
01:34:24.000 And it doesn't even fucking spin.
01:34:26.000 And you need it there.
01:34:27.000 And it regulates the tides.
01:34:29.000 And if it was any further or any closer, everybody would be dead.
01:34:34.000 That's crazy!
01:34:36.000 That itself is fucking crazy.
01:34:38.000 You don't have to pretend you're seeing trees.
01:34:40.000 You don't have to pretend the earth is flat, you fucking retards.
01:34:43.000 That doesn't help anybody.
01:34:43.000 But that's where faith comes in.
01:34:45.000 Like, they're saying, how can all these things fall?
01:34:47.000 How can all these things fall?
01:34:48.000 Because they don't know physics.
01:34:49.000 They don't know.
01:34:50.000 Jamie, explain.
01:34:53.000 I took physics in high school, a little bit in college, and when Eddie was going on his rant, I couldn't remember all the things to say, so I wasn't going to break out physics laws and whatnot to break down each step.
01:35:02.000 But if you do physics experiments in class, you will easily see all of these steps, and it blows your mind.
01:35:08.000 You're like, oh my god, it's amazing how this works.
01:35:11.000 There's math that's been done over hundreds of years.
01:35:13.000 And it's disrespectful.
01:35:14.000 100%, yeah.
01:35:29.000 When you see guys like yourself or guys like Damian Maia or guys like Wonderboy or any of the top fighters today or Mighty Mouse, you're seeing the highest expression of martial arts that has ever existed in the world.
01:35:43.000 It is a fact.
01:35:44.000 It's an undeniable fact.
01:35:45.000 Anybody that tells me the people from the past were better, you don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
01:35:50.000 There's no chance in hell.
01:35:52.000 This is an undeniable fact, an objective fact.
01:35:55.000 Okay.
01:35:56.000 Well, this didn't happen immediately.
01:35:59.000 It didn't happen because one guy figured out how to fight.
01:36:01.000 Like, there's this one guy in Brooklyn that has this fucking street fighting class.
01:36:05.000 It's got this deadly touch of death that he could do to people.
01:36:07.000 And all this other things you've been doing.
01:36:09.000 It's all bullshit.
01:36:09.000 They think that chokes work.
01:36:11.000 Chokes don't work.
01:36:11.000 They don't work on me.
01:36:13.000 Chokes don't work.
01:36:13.000 And you go back to your friend.
01:36:14.000 Chokes don't work.
01:36:15.000 The earth is flat?
01:36:16.000 It's flat?
01:36:17.000 Are you sure it's flat?
01:36:18.000 It's fucking bananas to think that someone is going to be able to...
01:36:23.000 You can manipulate the weak minds so easy.
01:36:27.000 It's not even the weak minds.
01:36:28.000 It's the uninformed minds that are busy and that watch YouTube videos.
01:36:31.000 That's what it is.
01:36:32.000 It's not even that you're weak.
01:36:33.000 Because a lot of times when people speak well...
01:36:35.000 So what about this lizard people?
01:36:37.000 Have you seen that shit?
01:36:40.000 What the fuck is that?
01:36:42.000 It's all bullshit.
01:36:43.000 It's all bullshit.
01:36:44.000 These are people that are aliens, but they...
01:36:49.000 Have you seen the YouTube videos?
01:36:50.000 Have you seen them?
01:36:51.000 I've seen plenty of them.
01:36:52.000 That was one of the David Icke things, right?
01:36:54.000 He believed that all of the elites were reptilians.
01:36:57.000 Reptilians, that's what it is.
01:36:58.000 If you defend that, you're a reptilian.
01:37:00.000 And even if you defend that you are a reptilian, even...
01:37:03.000 Are you putting it up?
01:37:05.000 Oh yeah, did you see that?
01:37:06.000 Said he is investigating a possible extraterrestrial signal from deep space.
01:37:11.000 Yeah, they said this is not a drill.
01:37:12.000 That's the movie Contact.
01:37:14.000 Yeah, literally.
01:37:15.000 Yeah, literally.
01:37:16.000 She's in it, too.
01:37:17.000 That movie was dope as fuck.
01:37:19.000 Yeah, well, that's the image.
01:37:20.000 Right, gotcha.
01:37:21.000 But this is a real SETI signal that they're investigating.
01:37:24.000 It is amazing, man.
01:37:26.000 That movie, Contact, was fucking badass, by the way.
01:37:29.000 I love that movie.
01:37:30.000 I mean there has to be there has to be something outside of our realm.
01:37:34.000 There's not just something.
01:37:35.000 Here's how infinity is best explained.
01:37:38.000 This is the best definition that I've read.
01:37:40.000 Not only is the universe infinite, but what that means is if you exist Everything that has ever happened on this earth in the exact same order, every pebble falling into the same crevice over and over again,
01:37:58.000 I mean with no variation at all, has not just happened before.
01:38:01.000 Every word I've said, including that pause, has taken place in exactly the same way.
01:38:07.000 Not just once.
01:38:09.000 But an infinite number of times where there is no end.
01:38:13.000 Why do you say that?
01:38:13.000 Because that's what real infinity is.
01:38:15.000 So we can't understand infinity because our brains...
01:38:17.000 Like, if you tell someone, hey, we drank six Budweiser's.
01:38:20.000 Man, you guys must have got fucked up.
01:38:21.000 That makes sense.
01:38:22.000 You get those numbers, right?
01:38:23.000 Do you really understand, like, when someone says 6,000 miles, you go, okay, all right, well, the United States is how many thousand miles?
01:38:32.000 You gotta go, how many thousand miles past that?
01:38:33.000 It gets a little blurry, right?
01:38:35.000 And then you go, oh, well, the moon is 250,000 miles away.
01:38:38.000 You go, what?
01:38:39.000 How far is that?
01:38:40.000 And you start thinking, well, the moon is, you know, how far is the sun?
01:38:43.000 And that's a million.
01:38:44.000 Well, they found this fucking planet that's Earth-like, and it's four light-years away.
01:38:49.000 What's that?
01:38:50.000 What's four light-years?
01:38:51.000 How fast does light go?
01:38:53.000 I'm lost, right?
01:38:55.000 200 feet a second, right?
01:38:57.000 So what we have is senses and what we have is an understanding of our environment that's immediate to us because we're basically monkeys that just a few thousand years ago were worried about being eaten by shit, right?
01:39:09.000 So finally we reach the stage where we don't have to worry too much about being eaten by shit, which is why shark videos are so awesome to us, right?
01:39:18.000 So now you're on evolution.
01:39:20.000 Well, I'm just saying this is a recent state where we're trying to understand things past our immediate area of things that are going to eat us.
01:39:27.000 So we don't really have the capacity or the need, or we've never had the need before, to try to understand what the fuck 250 million miles is, or 250,000 miles, or four light years.
01:39:38.000 It's too confusing to us.
01:39:41.000 It's hard for us to grasp.
01:39:43.000 So when someone starts talking about infinity, It's impossible to grasp because what infinity means is there's no end.
01:39:50.000 It never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ends.
01:39:53.000 So everything on this earth that's ever happened, like in the universe, not only is there a cowboy that never found that rec center and never got into fighting, but there's infinite varieties that Of all the different lives of Cowboy,
01:40:08.000 with every single different step you took, and infinite numbers of each one of those individual choices with every single word, every single phrase, every single thought, all in the exact same order, taking place an infinite number of times.
01:40:23.000 I need DMT to understand this.
01:40:25.000 That's not even going to work.
01:40:26.000 I don't understand it.
01:40:27.000 I'm saying it and I don't understand it.
01:40:29.000 Because it's impossible to understand.
01:40:30.000 The universe has no end.
01:40:33.000 This is the main mind blower of the universe.
01:40:38.000 Inside every galaxy, you look up there, there's hundreds of millions of galaxies.
01:40:41.000 Inside every galaxy is a supermassive black hole that's one half of one percent of the mass of the galaxy.
01:40:48.000 Scientists believe it is entirely possible that you go through that black hole and you hit an infinite number of other universes.
01:40:56.000 That each one of those is a new universe.
01:40:59.000 Like every black hole you go into it is a new universe.
01:41:02.000 In that universe there's hundreds of billions of galaxies.
01:41:05.000 Each one has a black hole in the center of it.
01:41:07.000 Each one of those takes you to another universe of hundreds of millions and billions of galaxies and each one of them has a black hole and it goes on and on and on and on and on and there's no No end.
01:41:18.000 So this infinite universe that we see is one of infinite universes that we can't even possibly understand.
01:41:27.000 There's no way.
01:41:29.000 There's no end to any of it.
01:41:31.000 Alright.
01:41:33.000 So, from this podcast, we're going to go to the Church of Scientology and learn the truth.
01:41:38.000 For $500.
01:41:39.000 Because we need to know.
01:41:40.000 I need to put you to an e-meter.
01:41:43.000 For only $500.
01:41:44.000 And then for a million, I'll give you the secret.
01:41:48.000 Right?
01:41:49.000 Yeah, you have to blow someone.
01:41:51.000 Oh.
01:41:52.000 That's what I hear to get the secret.
01:41:53.000 I'm out.
01:41:53.000 I'm out.
01:41:54.000 I ate your tobacco.
01:41:55.000 I'm out.
01:41:55.000 How much worse is blowing a guy than eating tobacco?
01:41:58.000 The light year is worse.
01:42:01.000 How many light years?
01:42:03.000 What is a light year?
01:42:04.000 What are we talking here?
01:42:06.000 Light years.
01:42:11.000 Budweiser's pissed now.
01:42:12.000 They're talking about blowing guys!
01:42:14.000 Pull the plug on Cerrone!
01:42:17.000 There's some fat guy with a guz, been jealous of you the whole time, very upset.
01:42:20.000 His tie's flopping around, he's running down the office right now listening to this.
01:42:23.000 Have you heard Cerrone?
01:42:25.000 They're sponsoring this guy?
01:42:26.000 Damn it.
01:42:27.000 They're talking about sucking dicks and kicking ass!
01:42:30.000 Eating pussy and kicking ass.
01:42:31.000 Come on now.
01:42:33.000 We did talk about that one line where it's like, wait, what?
01:42:36.000 Wait, what?
01:42:37.000 I saw a dude got that tattooed on his arm.
01:42:39.000 Sucking dick and kicking ass.
01:42:41.000 Yes, he did.
01:42:41.000 It was on Instagram.
01:42:43.000 Wow.
01:42:43.000 See if he can find it.
01:42:44.000 He sent it to Wheeler Walker.
01:42:45.000 Wheeler probably put it on his Instagram.
01:42:48.000 Wheeler is a different guy, isn't he?
01:42:50.000 Well, he is a different guy.
01:42:51.000 He's a different guy.
01:42:52.000 I knew him before he was Wheeler.
01:42:53.000 Yeah?
01:42:54.000 Yeah, I know the real him.
01:42:57.000 I don't understand.
01:42:58.000 What do you mean the real him?
01:42:59.000 See?
01:43:00.000 Eating pussies, sucking dick, and kicking ass.
01:43:04.000 In the American colors.
01:43:06.000 Well, it's not that much of a secret, so I can talk about it, but Wheeler Walker Jr. is a guy named Ben Hoffman.
01:43:13.000 He's a comedian from Kentucky.
01:43:16.000 He created Wheeler Walker Jr. Am I supposed to talk about this?
01:43:19.000 Why not?
01:43:20.000 It's obvious.
01:43:20.000 It's out now.
01:43:21.000 Everybody knows it.
01:43:21.000 It was on his show.
01:43:24.000 But he just rides it into the rocks.
01:43:26.000 Like, he comes on the podcast as Wheeler Walker, keeps the sunglasses on, he's got the full beard, but he's also been on the podcast as Ben Hoffman.
01:43:33.000 So when he's Wheeler Walker, is he just talking reckless?
01:43:35.000 He's a wild man!
01:43:37.000 He's just, he's saying what he really believes when it comes to country music, because he really is an absolute country music fan.
01:43:44.000 What is this?
01:43:45.000 The fuck is this shit, man?
01:43:47.000 When we hear this, hold on.
01:43:48.000 Snapchat without the dicks?
01:43:49.000 Hold on.
01:43:50.000 Can you reboot it?
01:43:51.000 Yeah.
01:43:54.000 Yeah, Instagram's weird like that, right?
01:43:55.000 Here it goes.
01:43:56.000 Let's hear what he says.
01:43:56.000 What the fuck is this shit, man?
01:43:59.000 Snapchat without the dicks?
01:44:01.000 Thumbs down, dude.
01:44:04.000 Need them dicks.
01:44:10.000 It's funny!
01:44:11.000 It's just ridiculous and funny, man.
01:44:14.000 I'm a huge fan of what he's doing.
01:44:17.000 He's wild, bro.
01:44:19.000 See, corporate America would have never created that, and that's how he exists.
01:44:23.000 He exists because he came up with this on his own, and the country music world is freaking the fuck out.
01:44:28.000 Freaking the fuck out.
01:44:28.000 Because this guy's selling out arenas.
01:44:30.000 I mean, Wheeler Walker Jr., since he's been on our podcast, that was just when he was starting to catch on.
01:44:36.000 When he came on the podcast, he was already getting some momentum.
01:44:40.000 It was just starting to catch on.
01:44:41.000 And since then, the more these videos get shared online, the more people start laughing their asses off.
01:44:47.000 His shows are fucking huge!
01:44:50.000 Sold out!
01:44:51.000 Giant places!
01:44:52.000 And he's killing it!
01:44:54.000 You're plugging him huge again.
01:44:56.000 They didn't know it was coming, man.
01:44:57.000 They didn't know it was coming.
01:44:58.000 You know why they didn't know?
01:44:59.000 Because they're trying to make a Luke Bryan.
01:45:01.000 No disrespect, Luke.
01:45:02.000 I hear you're a great guy.
01:45:03.000 Cameron Haynes is a friend with you.
01:45:05.000 I shouldn't say Luke Bryan because I actually like some of his songs.
01:45:09.000 Let me think of a guy who's like, who's a shitty...
01:45:10.000 Here's one that Wheeler Walker always talks about.
01:45:13.000 The Florida Georgia line.
01:45:15.000 I don't know anything about those guys.
01:45:17.000 Okay.
01:45:17.000 What do you know?
01:45:18.000 Do you know them?
01:45:19.000 I know them.
01:45:20.000 Okay.
01:45:20.000 Let's just drop it.
01:45:22.000 Let's just drop it.
01:45:23.000 Are you friends with those dudes?
01:45:24.000 I mean, I don't know about friends.
01:45:26.000 They wouldn't call me and wish me happy birthday.
01:45:28.000 That's what you're asking.
01:45:28.000 Wheeler Walker calls it rap music for people who are scared of black folks.
01:45:32.000 Oh, wow.
01:45:36.000 He was talking about how they're throwing their hands up.
01:45:38.000 They seem like fine folks.
01:45:40.000 They seem like great guys.
01:45:42.000 But...
01:45:43.000 What he's talking about on stage when he's doing, what Wheeler's doing, is something that no corporate entity or no PR firm would ever allow.
01:45:52.000 Oh, ever allow.
01:45:53.000 Ever.
01:45:54.000 But look how goddamn popular it is.
01:45:57.000 Because people like crazy.
01:46:00.000 They like crazy.
01:46:01.000 I mean, so do you know who Riff Raff is?
01:46:05.000 No.
01:46:06.000 Is he a rapper?
01:46:07.000 Go ahead, Paul.
01:46:07.000 Sounds like a rapper.
01:46:09.000 He is a white rapper.
01:46:10.000 And his raps are like sitting with Joe, drinking bud, fucking bitches, kicking ass.
01:46:18.000 That's like his rap.
01:46:19.000 Similar.
01:46:20.000 It's a lot similar.
01:46:21.000 But, I mean, he's...
01:46:22.000 You talk about it sells out millions.
01:46:24.000 This guy's crazy, though.
01:46:25.000 Crazy.
01:46:26.000 He made his thing off...
01:46:31.000 G's the Gents on VH1, I think it was.
01:46:34.000 Look at him.
01:46:35.000 He's out of control.
01:46:36.000 So I did a monster signing.
01:46:37.000 He's sponsored by monsters.
01:46:38.000 So I did a monster signing with this guy.
01:46:40.000 And he was two and a half hours late.
01:46:43.000 He's got BET tattooed on his neck.
01:46:46.000 What the fuck did you expect?
01:46:47.000 MTV. But BET as well.
01:46:49.000 Yeah, he's wild.
01:46:50.000 Tell him he's white.
01:46:52.000 Tell him.
01:46:54.000 He's out of control.
01:46:55.000 So this is the same.
01:46:56.000 Oh, he does have BET right there on his neck.
01:47:00.000 So yeah, he talked about the same thing.
01:47:02.000 He's outlandish, man.
01:47:04.000 Tiptoeing in my Jordans is one of his songs.
01:47:07.000 Tiptoeing in my Jordans?
01:47:08.000 Yeah.
01:47:10.000 It's a hit.
01:47:11.000 People, they want something outside the norm.
01:47:13.000 And a good percentage of the people that are listening to this right now are stuck.
01:47:17.000 Living some life where you have to pretend all day long that you don't think certain things.
01:47:22.000 I like the way he's dressed.
01:47:24.000 He's wild, man.
01:47:26.000 Did you ever sag your pants like that?
01:47:27.000 No.
01:47:28.000 Good for you.
01:47:28.000 No, my dick's big enough to hold my pants up.
01:47:30.000 God bless you.
01:47:32.000 Sagging pants is one of the things that frustrates me the most about this youth culture.
01:47:36.000 I would have thought that with the UFC around, people would understand.
01:47:40.000 Skinny and sagging is a bad combo.
01:47:42.000 That's a bad combo.
01:47:43.000 That's confused.
01:47:45.000 It is confused.
01:47:45.000 That's confused.
01:47:46.000 But it's the new trend.
01:47:47.000 I mean, everyone wants to be in the trend, so whatever it is, it is.
01:47:50.000 What the fuck is...
01:47:51.000 Why is sagging jeans?
01:47:52.000 Why is...
01:47:53.000 What is that?
01:47:54.000 It all comes from prison, right?
01:47:57.000 I've never been to prison, so I have no fucking idea.
01:48:00.000 I think the idea was that you couldn't get a belt because you would choke yourself to death.
01:48:04.000 You could hang yourself with a belt so that everyone's pants were sort of sagging, so it made you look like you were some sort of a criminal type character if you wandered around with no belt on.
01:48:13.000 Like as if you're pretending that you're out there in prison with your Jordans on.
01:48:18.000 And pretending.
01:48:19.000 I don't know.
01:48:20.000 With your underwear hanging out.
01:48:21.000 I'm a big fan of my jeans where they fit.
01:48:24.000 But other gay guys that were in prison or guys who used to fuck guys in prison that have been interviewed said that that was how guys would let you know they were ready to be taken.
01:48:32.000 They'd have their pants halfway down.
01:48:33.000 That was an international sign for take the booty.
01:48:36.000 Did you ever see that dude on like one of those prison shows they call themselves the booty bandit?
01:48:41.000 No.
01:48:42.000 You ever see that guy?
01:48:43.000 Oh my god, I'm going to introduce you to a wonderful world.
01:48:45.000 We'll get pulled from YouTube if we play this, right?
01:48:48.000 Won't we?
01:48:49.000 Yeah, most likely.
01:48:51.000 There's a world of copyrights today.
01:48:53.000 Rightly so.
01:48:54.000 I mean, they did find the Booty Bandit.
01:48:56.000 Anyway, this fucking dude was on one of those shows, like TLC or something like that to go into prison, and he would talk about all the different guys he fucked, and that booty was basically like currency.
01:49:08.000 Yeah, that's the dude.
01:49:09.000 You gotta listen to this.
01:49:10.000 I don't give a fuck.
01:49:10.000 Booty is currency.
01:49:12.000 Yeah, you gotta listen to what this guy talks about.
01:49:15.000 Give me some volume, Young Jamie.
01:49:21.000 What's the matter?
01:49:23.000 We're being invaded by the government.
01:49:24.000 Yeah, we are.
01:49:25.000 Budweiser has hacked this show.
01:49:27.000 Hacked it.
01:49:27.000 Turn it off.
01:49:28.000 Enough.
01:49:28.000 They're talking about sucking dicks.
01:49:29.000 Now they're talking about booty.
01:49:31.000 Booty is currency.
01:49:31.000 We're talking about sucking dicks.
01:49:32.000 Now they're talking about booty is currency.
01:49:34.000 There's no sound on it for some reason.
01:49:36.000 No sound on this?
01:49:37.000 See if one of the other videos plays sound.
01:49:39.000 How did CM Punk get on that...
01:49:42.000 Probably because Jamie's been drooling over CM Punk videos.
01:49:46.000 Go back to the one you were just on.
01:49:48.000 CM Punk was on the side there.
01:49:51.000 Suggestions.
01:49:52.000 Right there.
01:49:52.000 Joe Rogan on CM Punk.
01:49:54.000 That's hilarious.
01:49:55.000 What did you say?
01:49:56.000 Nothing good.
01:49:57.000 Oh, really?
01:49:58.000 Nothing bad.
01:49:59.000 I don't know anything.
01:50:00.000 No one knows anything.
01:50:01.000 No one knows anything.
01:50:01.000 That's the thing.
01:50:02.000 I mean, they want me to say things.
01:50:03.000 Here he is, a booty bandit.
01:50:08.000 Speaks on it.
01:50:09.000 Okay.
01:50:12.000 This isn't working.
01:50:14.000 This is not the same video.
01:50:17.000 Go to the one...
01:50:18.000 So we just figured out how to get it to talk?
01:50:20.000 Here he goes.
01:50:25.000 You got two things playing, Jamie.
01:50:33.000 Somebody put a laugh track on it?
01:50:34.000 Oh.
01:50:35.000 A what?
01:50:35.000 They put a laugh track on it.
01:50:40.000 Here's the raw version of it.
01:50:43.000 Go ahead.
01:50:44.000 It doesn't have sound.
01:50:45.000 Oh, so it's a bad video?
01:50:45.000 Give us the cliff notes.
01:50:46.000 All right.
01:50:46.000 Well, the dude was just talking about fucking guys in prison.
01:50:49.000 And using it for currency.
01:50:53.000 Wow.
01:50:54.000 Oh, the CM Punk thing.
01:50:56.000 I didn't say anything bad about him.
01:50:57.000 You can't say anything about him.
01:50:59.000 They want me to hype it up.
01:51:00.000 It's very interesting.
01:51:01.000 He did the right thing.
01:51:02.000 He went to a real good camp.
01:51:04.000 He didn't fight for two whole years.
01:51:06.000 He'd just been training.
01:51:07.000 Which you would have to.
01:51:08.000 Yeah, apparently he's got some smokers.
01:51:10.000 Because you can't...
01:51:12.000 There's no way you could learn a decade of skills in three months.
01:51:18.000 No, and that kid he's fighting is good.
01:51:20.000 The kid who's fighting can scrap.
01:51:21.000 I like the way he took that dude's back.
01:51:23.000 I like the way he choked him out, showed real good technique.
01:51:25.000 He knows how to fight.
01:51:26.000 Like, it's not going to be an easy fight.
01:51:28.000 No, I mean, and for CM Punk, it's...
01:51:30.000 To fight someone in the UFC is...
01:51:32.000 Let's call him Phil.
01:51:32.000 Phil.
01:51:33.000 Yeah.
01:51:33.000 All right.
01:51:34.000 Fair enough.
01:51:35.000 That's his name, right?
01:51:36.000 Yeah.
01:51:36.000 He's going to be Phil Brooks when he fights, I think.
01:51:38.000 I'm pretty sure.
01:51:39.000 No, they're coming out of the punk.
01:51:40.000 Are they really saying CM Punk?
01:51:42.000 Why not?
01:51:42.000 Because I don't know.
01:51:43.000 Well, they must have made a deal with the WWE so they could use Brock Lesnar.
01:51:47.000 The UFC owns everything.
01:51:48.000 Talk about Luminati.
01:51:49.000 The Luminati.
01:51:50.000 The Luminati.
01:51:51.000 They own your likeness for life.
01:51:53.000 Is that necessary?
01:51:55.000 I don't think so.
01:51:55.000 I think when I'm 80, I should be able to get that back.
01:51:57.000 LAUGHTER Is there another sport that owns your likeness?
01:52:04.000 Does the NFL own your likeness?
01:52:06.000 For life.
01:52:07.000 CM Punk, zero.
01:52:08.000 There it is.
01:52:08.000 See, they got him at zero.
01:52:09.000 And this dude's only 2-0.
01:52:11.000 But the kid's good.
01:52:12.000 How is he in the UFC at 2-0?
01:52:14.000 Because just for this fight.
01:52:15.000 That's how he's in there.
01:52:16.000 Well, that's not fair.
01:52:18.000 You're right.
01:52:18.000 You're right.
01:52:19.000 It's not fair.
01:52:19.000 But it is.
01:52:21.000 Because it doesn't matter.
01:52:22.000 It's not like he's taking a fight away from somebody.
01:52:24.000 No.
01:52:24.000 We've got to see somebody.
01:52:25.000 Look, if the UFC wants to maximize the CM Punk thing.
01:52:28.000 Wait, why does it say 185-170?
01:52:30.000 Wait.
01:52:31.000 That's just a mistake.
01:52:32.000 On whose part?
01:52:33.000 Somebody wrote it in there.
01:52:34.000 They fuck up all the time.
01:52:36.000 These kids are barely paying attention.
01:52:38.000 And Sam Punk in this shot does not look like a WWE wrestler.
01:52:43.000 No.
01:52:44.000 Well, he's natural.
01:52:46.000 I mean, that's part of his whole shtick.
01:52:48.000 That's USADA. Yeah.
01:52:49.000 Well, he's always been natural.
01:52:51.000 Even if you see him in the WWE. Oh, yeah, that's right.
01:52:53.000 We've talked about him and I've talked about him.
01:52:55.000 He's straight edge.
01:52:57.000 No booze ever.
01:52:57.000 No nothing ever.
01:52:58.000 No pot.
01:52:59.000 No nothing.
01:52:59.000 No steroids.
01:53:00.000 That's right.
01:53:01.000 Probably doesn't even take vitamins.
01:53:02.000 His dog's name is Larry.
01:53:04.000 We've talked about this.
01:53:05.000 Yeah, good luck with all that, dude.
01:53:08.000 Good luck with all that living life sober.
01:53:10.000 Oh, I'm sure you're a great guy to hang around with.
01:53:13.000 Oh, I'm sure the stories and the fun that come out of his mouth are unreal, huh?
01:53:16.000 Definitely not a control freak.
01:53:18.000 Definitely not, like, super weird about, like, certain subjects.
01:53:22.000 Get the fuck out of here.
01:53:23.000 Huh.
01:53:25.000 I'm with you, man.
01:53:26.000 We found alcohol in hallucinogenics for a reason.
01:53:31.000 How dare you pretend you're smarter than all the people before you that have learned how fun it is to party?
01:53:36.000 It's the finger pointers.
01:53:37.000 The finger pointers get mad at you, but they're the same ones drinking in their basement by themselves.
01:53:41.000 They wish.
01:53:42.000 Some of them don't.
01:53:43.000 Some of them just keep it rigid forever.
01:53:46.000 You think so?
01:53:47.000 Yeah.
01:53:48.000 I think there's a lot of people that just cling on to whatever ridiculous notions they have of this life, and they get some sort of happiness in having control.
01:53:56.000 There's a certain sort of happiness in their routine, you know?
01:54:00.000 Like, you know, some people who only eat, I only eat for performance.
01:54:04.000 I don't really care about the taste.
01:54:06.000 What is that?
01:54:07.000 Fuck off.
01:54:07.000 Fuck all the way off.
01:54:09.000 All the way off.
01:54:10.000 Like, what do you mean you're a vegan?
01:54:12.000 What the fuck are you talking about?
01:54:14.000 People don't want anybody to die.
01:54:16.000 There's the Olympic power lifter.
01:54:18.000 Who's a vegan?
01:54:19.000 He's a vegan.
01:54:19.000 That's pretty impressive.
01:54:20.000 Test that motherfucker regularly.
01:54:22.000 Well, the last two years he's a vegan.
01:54:25.000 Oh, okay.
01:54:26.000 Still very impressive.
01:54:27.000 He still can compete.
01:54:28.000 And he feels stronger than he ever has.
01:54:30.000 That's amazing.
01:54:31.000 No, it's not amazing.
01:54:32.000 It's bullshit.
01:54:33.000 You need a fucking medium, juicy, blood dripping out steak.
01:54:38.000 That's how I feel, but I'm not that dude.
01:54:40.000 I don't think anybody should tell me that I can't eat meat, and I don't think I should be able to tell anybody that they have to eat meat.
01:54:46.000 I think if you're this dude that has it in your head that you don't want an animal to die, because you sync up with all these animals, and you feel like, if I can get through this life without an animal dying on my behalf...
01:54:55.000 That's better.
01:54:56.000 Okay, in this day and age, sure.
01:54:58.000 But let's take away everything and say you are just out there on your own.
01:55:03.000 You're going to have to eat.
01:55:04.000 You're going to have to.
01:55:05.000 You're going to fucking have to.
01:55:06.000 You can only pick so many fucking berries.
01:55:08.000 There's only so many berries that grow seasonally.
01:55:10.000 It's not enough calories.
01:55:13.000 No.
01:55:14.000 It's not enough protein.
01:55:15.000 We are made...
01:55:16.000 I mean, the vegans talk about gorillas, they only eat bananas.
01:55:20.000 They actually eat leaves and shit.
01:55:23.000 They only get bananas at the zoo.
01:55:25.000 Sorry.
01:55:27.000 You ever see a gorilla with a banana in the wild?
01:55:30.000 Now they're eating like bamboo stalks and shit.
01:55:32.000 I mean, regardless, we're not...
01:55:35.000 We're not gorillas.
01:55:37.000 We're not.
01:55:37.000 We're omnivores.
01:55:38.000 We are made to kill gorillas and eat them.
01:55:40.000 No, I don't think people eat.
01:55:42.000 They definitely eat gorillas, right?
01:55:43.000 I mean, if it was eat a bamboo shoot or a fucking gorilla, I'm taking the gorilla down.
01:55:48.000 But I think they eat gorillas anyway.
01:55:49.000 I know they eat a lot of monkeys.
01:55:51.000 They call it bushmeat.
01:55:53.000 Bushmeat is a real issue in some endangered species because they'll shoot chimps and shit like that and they'll eat them.
01:56:00.000 Yeah.
01:56:01.000 If it's you not eating or you eating a chimp, you're eating a chimp.
01:56:05.000 A buddy of mine was in Bolivia for that show Meat Eater.
01:56:07.000 He hosts that show, Steven Rinella.
01:56:09.000 Right.
01:56:09.000 And they shot a monkey and they cooked a monkey and he ate it.
01:56:12.000 I heard monkey brain's amazing.
01:56:15.000 I'd do it.
01:56:16.000 I'd eat the fucking, suck the eyeballs out of his skull.
01:56:21.000 Budweiser's like, that's it!
01:56:23.000 That's it!
01:56:24.000 Enough!
01:56:26.000 Call Dana White!
01:56:28.000 Enough!
01:56:29.000 Suck the eyeballs out of a monkey skull!
01:56:32.000 Really?
01:56:33.000 While he's holding a Budweiser that says America?
01:56:43.000 I'm glad I can make you laugh.
01:56:44.000 I sucked the eyeballs out of the monkeys.
01:56:47.000 Oh my god.
01:56:49.000 This is all pre-DMT. How about that?
01:56:51.000 That's hilarious.
01:56:52.000 God, when I come back, I'm going to be a whole new man.
01:56:54.000 Yeah, man, we have a real hard time eating monkeys.
01:56:56.000 I wouldn't be into eating monkeys.
01:56:57.000 I don't have a hard time eating anything.
01:56:59.000 You would eat a monkey for sure?
01:57:00.000 Yeah, if you fucking cooked up a monkey right now, I would eat it.
01:57:04.000 I would eat just about anything.
01:57:07.000 Would you eat primitive man?
01:57:08.000 Like, would you eat a Neanderthal?
01:57:10.000 So if we were on the movie Alive, and my plane crashed, and I had to eat some ass, sometimes I eat ass for fun, you know what I mean?
01:57:20.000 I mean, it's a different kind of ass, but yeah, I'm gonna go in.
01:57:22.000 I hope you don't eat that.
01:57:23.000 You're doing it wrong.
01:57:27.000 Are you using a spoon?
01:57:29.000 No, no, no, no.
01:57:30.000 That movie is not real.
01:57:37.000 Listen, if you are a man and you don't need to ask, there's something wrong with you.
01:57:41.000 Someone else is gonna.
01:57:42.000 Yeah, someone's gonna.
01:57:43.000 There's gonna be a dude who says, I really don't give a fuck, and he's gonna come along.
01:57:47.000 Yeah, I would literally eat, I mean, whatever.
01:57:51.000 Why not?
01:57:51.000 Why not?
01:57:52.000 Why not?
01:57:53.000 You wanna kill a rattlesnake?
01:57:54.000 Let's eat it.
01:57:54.000 Yeah, especially if I gotta stay alive.
01:57:56.000 I'm not a vegan, obviously, but taking the point of vegans, I can see what they're trying to do is they're trying to not contribute to any animals dying.
01:58:04.000 But they're put here to die.
01:58:07.000 Is that a bad thing to say?
01:58:09.000 I don't mean it like that, but I mean, we have to eat and we are the top of the food chain.
01:58:16.000 We definitely are the top of the food chain.
01:58:18.000 And this is the way I used to describe it.
01:58:19.000 There's a war going on between all the animals on this planet.
01:58:22.000 And the war is for survival.
01:58:24.000 And we are so far ahead of the rest of the people competing in the war, we forgot it's a war.
01:58:29.000 And we forgot that we have these prison colonies in our cities.
01:58:32.000 We call them zoos.
01:58:34.000 That's a fucking prison colony that shows you that we have won the battle over these stupid fucking cunty alligators and jaguars and shit.
01:58:41.000 And then you have dumb people like me that go swimming and chase sharks and they get eaten and they're like, ha, one for the low column.
01:58:47.000 Has anybody ever gone, like, getting eaten when they were diving?
01:58:51.000 I don't think so.
01:58:52.000 It's not very common at all.
01:58:53.000 Really uncommon, right?
01:58:54.000 I think it's maybe one?
01:58:56.000 I don't know.
01:58:57.000 Maybe ever, right?
01:58:57.000 He's probably an asshole.
01:58:58.000 Probably cut himself.
01:59:00.000 Yeah.
01:59:00.000 Or just chumming, trying to get close to a shark like I'm gonna do.
01:59:03.000 Oh, yeah.
01:59:04.000 You can do that, right?
01:59:05.000 You can do that?
01:59:06.000 Yeah, absolutely.
01:59:07.000 Chum the water a little bit.
01:59:08.000 Bring them in.
01:59:09.000 As long as you have a lot of chum.
01:59:11.000 And some sort of a pokey stick.
01:59:13.000 I don't know if that would work.
01:59:15.000 I think once a shark is in I'm eating you mode, I think you're getting eaten.
01:59:20.000 Alright, let's play a little game.
01:59:22.000 I got a little game for you.
01:59:22.000 If you could pick any animal that...
01:59:24.000 Alright, let's put you in a concrete room.
01:59:28.000 I don't care the size.
01:59:29.000 Any animal that I could fuck up?
01:59:30.000 I'll fuck up a squirrel.
01:59:31.000 But you're naked.
01:59:31.000 You have nothing.
01:59:32.000 I'll fuck a squirrel up naked or with clothes.
01:59:35.000 Squirrel's dead.
01:59:36.000 Squirrel would be your animal.
01:59:38.000 That'd be the highest you'd get.
01:59:39.000 I will fuck a squirrel up with confidence.
01:59:42.000 Bet the house on me.
01:59:44.000 Bam.
01:59:44.000 Squirrel.
01:59:45.000 A three-pound squirrel coming at you.
01:59:48.000 Three pounds is big.
01:59:49.000 I'm talking about a regular squirrel.
01:59:50.000 Okay.
01:59:50.000 A one-and-a-half-pound squirrel.
01:59:52.000 One-and-a-half-pound squirrel.
01:59:53.000 But seriously, have you ever seen a one-and-a-half-pound rat running at you?
01:59:56.000 It would scare the fuck out of you.
01:59:58.000 I think a cat would be a vicious fight.
02:00:01.000 For sure.
02:00:01.000 Clawing, biting.
02:00:02.000 For sure.
02:00:03.000 Yeah.
02:00:03.000 I have buddies of mine saying, oh, fuck that dog.
02:00:05.000 I'm like, yeah, I don't know, man.
02:00:07.000 I think if that dog's coming at you in a vicious way, I don't know if you can...
02:00:11.000 If you could take that, you know?
02:00:12.000 Yeah, especially if it's a good-sized one.
02:00:14.000 Like, any dog over 70 pounds, like a German Shepherd or something like that.
02:00:17.000 Even a 35-pound pit bull.
02:00:19.000 Oh, yeah.
02:00:20.000 Well, 35-pound pit bulls would kill a 70-pound German Shepherd.
02:00:23.000 That's a tricky one.
02:00:24.000 Because those dogs, that's a different sort of a beast.
02:00:27.000 Now, what if you fought a shark?
02:00:28.000 Would it have to be in the water?
02:00:29.000 It would have to be in the water.
02:00:30.000 It would have to be in the water.
02:00:31.000 So, no water.
02:00:32.000 No, like, crocodile.
02:00:33.000 Yeah.
02:00:35.000 No nine-pound crocodile.
02:00:38.000 Nine-pound crocodile, man.
02:00:39.000 You don't want that.
02:00:40.000 You don't want that in your life.
02:00:42.000 But I think you would probably win.
02:00:44.000 You would get fucked up.
02:00:45.000 Ten-pound rattlesnake.
02:00:47.000 Ten-pound rattlesnake.
02:00:49.000 That's a big fucking rattlesnake.
02:00:51.000 I just posted on my Instagram.
02:00:53.000 How long was it?
02:00:54.000 About as long as me.
02:00:56.000 He was mean, bro.
02:00:58.000 Have you guys ever seen the movie Rango with the rattlesnake that runs the town?
02:01:03.000 This motherfucker sat three feet off the ground and was like moving and dancing like literally three feet off the ground.
02:01:10.000 I've never seen anything like it.
02:01:11.000 He was fucking pissed off.
02:01:12.000 He was the Cowboy Cerrone of rattlesnakes.
02:01:14.000 Yeah, and he was even more mad.
02:01:16.000 I kept thumping him in the head with a little snake catcher thing.
02:01:19.000 Oh, you were trying to catch him with one of those hooks?
02:01:20.000 Yeah, because we got a little hospital.
02:01:22.000 There he is right there.
02:01:22.000 Oh my God.
02:01:23.000 So I broke the rattler.
02:01:24.000 So he broke the rattler because when I grabbed his ass, he would fucking anaconda roll up that stick trying to get me.
02:01:31.000 He would like roll.
02:01:33.000 Crazy.
02:01:33.000 Holy shit.
02:01:33.000 Look at the size of him.
02:01:34.000 Oh man, he was a big boy.
02:01:35.000 He was pissed the fuck off.
02:01:37.000 So there's a hospital right down the street that you take him and they milk him.
02:01:40.000 500 bucks they give you.
02:01:42.000 So I could kill him or I take him and get 500 bucks.
02:01:45.000 It's a good move.
02:01:46.000 Yeah, so then they, you know, but we have, this is probably like my 8th or 9th one I've caught this year.
02:01:50.000 It's crazy.
02:01:51.000 Oh, wow, so that's how they get the rattlesnake venom.
02:01:52.000 Yeah, there he goes.
02:01:53.000 Look at him snaking up.
02:01:54.000 Wow.
02:01:55.000 We're putting him in the toolbox.
02:01:56.000 Oh, yeah.
02:01:56.000 So what happens to the rattler now?
02:01:58.000 He doesn't have a rattler anymore?
02:01:59.000 No, they grow back every time they re-skin or whatever that's called.
02:02:02.000 Oh, really?
02:02:02.000 So they'll grow back every one of those levels?
02:02:04.000 Yep.
02:02:04.000 And each one of those levels is how many...
02:02:06.000 Don't quote me.
02:02:06.000 I don't know.
02:02:07.000 I just know the bigger and badder they get, the more buttons they get.
02:02:10.000 Yeah, like each year, right?
02:02:11.000 They got a new one?
02:02:12.000 Yeah, fuck, I wish I had the info for that, but I just know he was a big bitch.
02:02:16.000 That's an old rattlesnake, man.
02:02:18.000 That's a dude who's seen some shit.
02:02:19.000 Seen some shit.
02:02:21.000 Yeah, my dog just got bit the other day, right in the nose.
02:02:25.000 Swell up?
02:02:26.000 Yeah, swole all the way up.
02:02:27.000 I thought I was going to...
02:02:28.000 I was calling the girl, telling her, hey man, I'm going to have to put this dog down.
02:02:31.000 Did you take it to the vet?
02:02:33.000 No, I'm not paying $1,500 for nothing.
02:02:35.000 I got a three cent solution to that.
02:02:38.000 Oh, man.
02:02:39.000 Hey, I love my animals.
02:02:42.000 He lived.
02:02:42.000 He shook it off.
02:02:43.000 He made it.
02:02:44.000 Right on the nose, man.
02:02:45.000 He took it.
02:02:46.000 His face swallowed for about a week.
02:02:48.000 Went down, got him some pillows, sent it, penicillin, gave him a couple shots, and called it a day.
02:02:53.000 I had two different dogs got bit.
02:02:56.000 One dog got bit twice.
02:02:58.000 I had to take him to the vet.
02:03:00.000 I had a crazy dog named Frank Sinatra.
02:03:01.000 So you paid $1,500.
02:03:02.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:03:03.000 And it worked.
02:03:04.000 Yeah, I had to.
02:03:05.000 I'm with you.
02:03:06.000 See, the way your bank account and my bank account are set up, I don't have that $1,500 put it on a dog bill.
02:03:11.000 You gotta put that aside and stop buying jet skis.
02:03:14.000 No.
02:03:15.000 No, because I'm too busy living life having fun, man.
02:03:18.000 I understand.
02:03:18.000 But to me, an animal that I'm taking care of becomes family.
02:03:21.000 He is family.
02:03:22.000 I have to take care of him.
02:03:23.000 So if it was my kid, I would spend $1,500.
02:03:27.000 Well, duh.
02:03:28.000 So if it's my dog, I'm still going to spend that $1,500.
02:03:31.000 Yeah, but then a dog's just a dog.
02:03:32.000 But a dog can make it.
02:03:33.000 A dog can make it.
02:03:35.000 A little kid is not going to make it if they get bit by a rattlesnake.
02:03:37.000 We're so soft.
02:03:38.000 Could you fucking imagine that?
02:03:40.000 We're so weak.
02:03:40.000 Taking a fucking...
02:03:42.000 So I almost got bit by a rattlesnake.
02:03:44.000 I was out of the lake walking around.
02:03:46.000 One struck at my ankle.
02:03:49.000 Barely missed me.
02:03:50.000 So I went and grabbed my gun out of the...
02:03:53.000 Truck.
02:03:54.000 And I sat there and I shot this motherfucker.
02:03:56.000 BING! And instead of curing up and running off, that fucking snake would just lunge at me.
02:04:01.000 I'd shoot it again.
02:04:02.000 After you shot it?
02:04:02.000 I shot him five times.
02:04:04.000 I just shot.
02:04:04.000 Yeah, everywhere.
02:04:05.000 Everywhere by his head because I'm a terrible fucking shot.
02:04:07.000 So...
02:04:09.000 Well, they shoot him in the head, you gotta get way too close!
02:04:12.000 So I'm ripping this dude's body apart and he's like, somehow still summoning the muscle to stay upright and fucking lash at me.
02:04:21.000 They're like devil dogs, man, for sure.
02:04:24.000 Well, you think of what they are.
02:04:26.000 When people talk about reptilians, what are they really worried about?
02:04:30.000 They're not worried about people turning into panda bears.
02:04:32.000 They're worried about people being reptiles, so people being completely cold and focused on the task at hand with no emotions.
02:04:38.000 That's what a reptile is, man.
02:04:40.000 That's what people are worried about.
02:04:41.000 We're putting a sixer back here.
02:04:42.000 Yeah.
02:04:42.000 It's going good.
02:04:43.000 We're going down.
02:04:44.000 So hopefully you have something to talk about for three seconds.
02:04:45.000 Don't worry about it, man.
02:04:46.000 We're talking about rattlesnakes and gophers.
02:04:49.000 It is kind of weird that some animals have poison.
02:04:54.000 Like, some creatures that live on this planet have poison.
02:04:57.000 And they can fuck you up.
02:04:59.000 And they live amongst us.
02:05:00.000 Like, there's rattlesnakes all around where we are, right here.
02:05:02.000 You know, in the valley?
02:05:04.000 You can go out in those hillsides, anywhere, like, go down the 118 and go on those hiking trails.
02:05:10.000 People find rattlesnakes there all day.
02:05:13.000 If you have a house and you live anywhere in the Los Angeles area, it's entirely possible that if you leave an area undisturbed long enough, a black widow will form a little nest there.
02:05:23.000 Entirely possible.
02:05:24.000 I've seen, I don't know how many black widows in my life.
02:05:28.000 A hundred at least.
02:05:30.000 Maybe hundreds.
02:05:32.000 I saw two last week here.
02:05:33.000 Yeah.
02:05:34.000 In this place?
02:05:35.000 Yes.
02:05:35.000 In the studio!
02:05:36.000 That fucking studio's haunted!
02:05:39.000 We got them.
02:05:40.000 We got them.
02:05:41.000 On that SETI alien signal thing, did you look into that at all?
02:05:45.000 Did you read their article that came out?
02:05:47.000 I think the really fun title is all I want to get into.
02:05:51.000 Okay?
02:05:52.000 This is why.
02:05:53.000 Because I want to hope that there's actually an alien signal.
02:05:57.000 So when you go into it and they explain the likelihood of it being an alien signal, that's super depressing.
02:06:03.000 Yeah.
02:06:03.000 Yeah, I know.
02:06:05.000 This was the thing I wanted to ask you about, though.
02:06:07.000 It's called a Dyson shell.
02:06:09.000 What is it?
02:06:10.000 No.
02:06:11.000 They said one of the hypotheses of if this was possibly a civilization, that it's one of two types of civilization.
02:06:17.000 I don't remember.
02:06:18.000 It's a Russian named...
02:06:20.000 Oh.
02:06:36.000 Which is what they picked up.
02:06:38.000 Wait a minute.
02:06:39.000 What?
02:06:40.000 So it's three meters thick and it covers the whole solar system?
02:06:44.000 Yeah.
02:06:45.000 The first three levels of it up into Earth.
02:06:48.000 It would have to be that?
02:06:49.000 That's what this hypothesis says.
02:06:51.000 I don't understand.
02:06:53.000 The radius of this circle.
02:06:54.000 In order to make that sort of energy?
02:06:57.000 If it's not this...
02:06:59.000 It's a type 1 civilization, which is sort of like what we are.
02:07:02.000 We can harness our stars, the sun, like we can do solar panels, and then shoot out a directional signal pointed at Earth, which is how we picked it up.
02:07:10.000 But isn't it also possible that it's some sort of a galactic event?
02:07:13.000 I think that's probably more likely that it's just a blip and they don't know what the blip is yet.
02:07:17.000 I think it's too big, Donald Cerrone.
02:07:19.000 So we went from rattlesnakes back to space?
02:07:22.000 Yeah.
02:07:22.000 Jamie jumped right back in.
02:07:24.000 He's been waiting.
02:07:25.000 Wow.
02:07:25.000 He loves space.
02:07:26.000 He loves the space.
02:07:27.000 I love space too.
02:07:28.000 I wish I could explain it a little more.
02:07:30.000 Nobody can.
02:07:31.000 I mean, even Neil deGrasse Tyson.
02:07:33.000 Neil deGrasse Tyson had a real fucking good point about the presidential candidates.
02:07:37.000 He said there should be an option that's called none of the above, and that when none of the above wins, we have to start all over again with new people.
02:07:44.000 That is a very fucking smart option.
02:07:47.000 So while we're touching on religion...
02:07:50.000 I'm gonna try one of those again where I don't swallow it.
02:07:51.000 Oh, you're going in again?
02:07:52.000 What is your outlook on the presidential election here?
02:07:57.000 Well, it's good, because it shows how fucking stupid this whole job is of having this one person who's a part of a two-party system.
02:08:05.000 We have to, like, be a registered Republican or Democrat to vote in the primaries and decide who these people are that get to represent this party or that party, and they get to this position, and there's only two of them.
02:08:16.000 It's preposterous.
02:08:17.000 It's ridiculous that these are the people we have to choose from.
02:08:20.000 Whether you like Donald Trump or you like Hillary Clinton, you have to realize at this point this is not the smart way to do it.
02:08:26.000 I'm packed.
02:08:26.000 Yeah, pack it up.
02:08:27.000 Tight.
02:08:28.000 So put it in and ball it up with your tongue.
02:08:29.000 Because before, it's like lawn trimmings.
02:08:31.000 I just dropped it off inside my mouth.
02:08:35.000 I can't believe you're going in for another one.
02:08:37.000 I'm pumped on it.
02:08:39.000 Okay.
02:08:39.000 I get it now.
02:08:40.000 Alright, you got it.
02:08:41.000 I got it all packed in there.
02:08:42.000 There you go.
02:08:43.000 Hopefully I don't swallow it.
02:08:44.000 I hope not.
02:08:45.000 That's a weird look though, isn't it?
02:08:47.000 Mmm.
02:08:48.000 You're good.
02:08:49.000 You're doing alright.
02:08:50.000 It doesn't taste bad, though.
02:08:51.000 That's what's interesting about it.
02:08:52.000 It tastes like winter green gum.
02:08:53.000 Yeah, a little like winter green gum.
02:08:55.000 How do you feel about girls chewing?
02:08:56.000 In my high school, a lot of girls chewed.
02:08:57.000 Ooh, yeah.
02:08:58.000 Those are girls that should move closer to cities.
02:09:04.000 Sweetie, there's other options.
02:09:06.000 Okay, I know you want to fit in.
02:09:08.000 You want people to love you.
02:09:10.000 Try DMT. Here you go.
02:09:12.000 Well, there's a lot of these gals out there that are forced.
02:09:14.000 They go to the outer regions of civilization.
02:09:16.000 They're forced to behave like pioneers.
02:09:18.000 You know?
02:09:19.000 They gotta go out there, they gotta make their own fucking houses, they gotta shoot their own food.
02:09:23.000 No, that's...
02:09:23.000 They're out there chewing tobacco.
02:09:24.000 The Amish is gone, okay?
02:09:25.000 Let's stop that.
02:09:28.000 Stop that.
02:09:29.000 They're out there chewing tobacco, fucking...
02:09:31.000 Chewing tobacco, killing...
02:09:31.000 Shooting dogs when they get bit by rattlesnakes.
02:09:33.000 Chewing monkeys, goddammit.
02:09:35.000 Heating monkeys.
02:09:35.000 Sucking the eyeballs out of a monkey.
02:09:39.000 Sucking dick, kicking ass.
02:09:41.000 Yeah.
02:09:44.000 Wow.
02:09:44.000 We might lose listeners due to this.
02:09:46.000 Yeah, it's over.
02:09:47.000 It's over.
02:09:48.000 This podcast is over.
02:09:48.000 It's been a good run.
02:09:50.000 840 episodes almost, right?
02:09:51.000 What is this one?
02:09:52.000 This is 840. 840. We closed it down.
02:09:55.000 We locked down with this one.
02:09:56.000 People were like, I got a life.
02:09:58.000 I can't do this anymore.
02:09:59.000 I can't listen.
02:10:00.000 I had you at work on the radio and I had to turn it off.
02:10:03.000 What happened?
02:10:04.000 What happened?
02:10:06.000 That's cool.
02:10:07.000 Shout out to all the blue collar workers out there listening in.
02:10:10.000 Shout out.
02:10:10.000 Shout out.
02:10:11.000 My people.
02:10:12.000 Shout out, ladies and gentlemen.
02:10:13.000 Yeah.
02:10:13.000 I'd be laying hardwood floors had I not picked up by the UFC. You probably are in another universe somewhere out there an infinite number of times.
02:10:21.000 Working hard.
02:10:21.000 Hardwood floors.
02:10:22.000 And you're watching some other dude fight the same fights that you fought.
02:10:27.000 Cheering his ass on.
02:10:28.000 Maybe.
02:10:29.000 Maybe mad.
02:10:30.000 I would probably be mad.
02:10:31.000 Probably pissed off.
02:10:32.000 I would probably...
02:10:33.000 I feel like...
02:10:34.000 I would be mad.
02:10:35.000 You probably would be mad.
02:10:36.000 If you're you and you took the run, here's what I think.
02:10:39.000 I think that you're you who is you right now is a result of a lot of these decisions.
02:10:43.000 So it'd be really interesting to see who you would be if you didn't make the same decisions.
02:10:48.000 Like who are you if you decide to never go into that rec room and learn how to fight?
02:10:52.000 Who are you if you have a fight and lose, you never come back, you never get better?
02:10:57.000 Who are you?
02:10:58.000 You know, I think who you are right now, a lot of times, is decided by a lot of the shit you've already done and how you feel about it.
02:11:05.000 Who I am, if I didn't walk into that record...
02:11:08.000 I don't know, my dad always tell me whenever I'd fuck up...
02:11:10.000 So, I was like the worst kid.
02:11:13.000 Bad.
02:11:13.000 Definitely not the worst kid.
02:11:15.000 I heard about a kid who stabbed his two-year-old sister.
02:11:17.000 I didn't do that.
02:11:17.000 That's the worst kid.
02:11:18.000 I shot my sister in the head with a slingshot.
02:11:20.000 Oops.
02:11:21.000 Pretty close.
02:11:22.000 A childish mistake.
02:11:23.000 Childish mistake.
02:11:24.000 So...
02:11:26.000 I feel like it was a rough childhood, you know, and I could only have sex on my back because I could only fuck up.
02:11:34.000 That should be the title of your book.
02:11:36.000 Yeah, my dad would say, if only you could use your powers for good instead of evil, you would make yourself out to be something great, you know, and here I am.
02:11:43.000 Telling people to suck eyeballs out of monkey brains and do DMT. Everybody is fucking different.
02:11:49.000 Everybody.
02:11:49.000 And for someone who's like you to pretend to be like your accountant is just as ridiculous as your accountant pretending to be you.
02:11:56.000 The key to this life is find out who you are.
02:11:59.000 And that is the hardest question to answer because who you are changes every day.
02:12:04.000 It's like, you gotta be true to whoever you are at the moment.
02:12:06.000 Do you believe that who you are is a sum of the five people you hang out with?
02:12:10.000 It helps.
02:12:11.000 It helps, right?
02:12:11.000 It definitely helps.
02:12:12.000 We feed off each other for sure.
02:12:13.000 You gotta surround yourself as much as you can with people that care about you, people that are...
02:12:20.000 They have the same sort of ambitions that you have in terms of like...
02:12:24.000 They have work ethic.
02:12:26.000 They're not lazy.
02:12:27.000 They don't fuck up.
02:12:28.000 They don't ruin their life constantly.
02:12:31.000 Because those people become like energy drains.
02:12:33.000 Right.
02:12:34.000 You know, it's not like you should totally abandon them, but you got to be real with them.
02:12:37.000 You got to let them know.
02:12:38.000 You got to say, listen, this is what's going on.
02:12:40.000 And this is how everybody's sort of looking at...
02:12:44.000 You keep doing this.
02:12:45.000 Don't do this anymore.
02:12:47.000 You're doing this because you get attention when you do it, because it's easier than succeeding.
02:12:52.000 I think especially in your line of work, I think that self-sabotage is a primary escape valve.
02:13:01.000 Who do you think the leader in the self-sabotage is?
02:13:05.000 I mean, you can go to fighters.
02:13:06.000 That's what I'm talking about.
02:13:07.000 I mean, old school fighters like Roberto Duran.
02:13:10.000 Like, Roberto Duran, right?
02:13:12.000 Beats Sugar Ray Leonard.
02:13:13.000 Duran, one of the four horsemen, man.
02:13:14.000 Packs on food, starts eating like a fucking pig, gets too fat, doesn't train hard, says no mas in the rematch.
02:13:22.000 You know, Tyson, in a lot of ways, was a self-saboteur.
02:13:26.000 Aaron Pryor became a crack addict, you know?
02:13:29.000 Got addicted to cocaine.
02:13:30.000 I heard some crazy stories about Tyson.
02:13:32.000 On a total fucking side note, you want to hear something really cool?
02:13:35.000 Yes.
02:13:36.000 Rick's story fight.
02:13:37.000 I park at the RV park, right?
02:13:38.000 That's where I find my zen.
02:13:40.000 I get away from the strip.
02:13:41.000 The RV park is zen.
02:13:42.000 I hang out at the RV park.
02:13:43.000 That's another title of your book.
02:13:45.000 I go to the lake.
02:13:47.000 Guess who?
02:13:49.000 My motherfucking neighbor was.
02:13:51.000 Who?
02:13:52.000 Suge Knight's brother, Ron Knight.
02:13:55.000 Oh.
02:13:55.000 How crazy is that?
02:13:57.000 What is that like?
02:13:58.000 So, this guy, this big giant black guy comes walking over to me.
02:14:01.000 First of all, his trailer is all black with red lights.
02:14:05.000 And this guy comes over to me and he's like, Hey man!
02:14:10.000 What do y'all shit on my porch?
02:14:14.000 I said, uh, no.
02:14:17.000 No one shit on your porch?
02:14:18.000 He said, yeah, I think one of your motherfucking dogs has shit on my porch.
02:14:21.000 And I said, nah, man.
02:14:24.000 He's like, I just want to make sure it was an accident and it wasn't anything, you know, like malicious.
02:14:28.000 Like, you guys, I need to make sure my area is secure.
02:14:32.000 And I was like, nah, man.
02:14:34.000 I don't, you know, I don't think so.
02:14:36.000 That's kind of funny.
02:14:37.000 And then I look at him and I look at his rig and I'm like, hey, man.
02:14:43.000 What do you do?
02:14:44.000 Because he's in like a $3 million RV, right?
02:14:47.000 $3 million?
02:14:48.000 Oh yeah.
02:14:48.000 My RV's really nice and his is extra nice.
02:14:51.000 So...
02:14:54.000 He said, oh, I do a little bit of real estate.
02:14:56.000 And I said, no, you don't.
02:14:59.000 Like, really?
02:15:00.000 I said, what do you do?
02:15:00.000 And he's like, oh, man, I do a little bit of music stuff, you know what I'm saying?
02:15:05.000 Death Row Records.
02:15:06.000 And I was like, oh, shit!
02:15:08.000 And then he just goes on talking about...
02:15:11.000 He's like, yeah, my name's Ron Knight.
02:15:13.000 And, you know, I was in there with Suge.
02:15:15.000 And I was like, oh, shit!
02:15:15.000 So then, of course, like any...
02:15:18.000 High schooler would.
02:15:19.000 I asked him any question you could ever imagine.
02:15:22.000 What was it like in the early days of NWA? Oh, totally.
02:15:25.000 Exactly.
02:15:26.000 I was that guy.
02:15:27.000 Asking him everything.
02:15:28.000 What was it like?
02:15:29.000 What was EZE like?
02:15:31.000 He told me that story that they did.
02:15:33.000 Straight Outta College was pretty right on, man.
02:15:35.000 They did a real good job.
02:15:37.000 And I asked him about Ice Cube.
02:15:39.000 And he said that Cube, he doesn't really go out and party.
02:15:42.000 He's just really to himself and making money.
02:15:45.000 Any question you could ever think of, I asked, for sure.
02:15:47.000 We sat there for all the nights leading up to the fight, and he actually stuck around, and I got his number now.
02:15:52.000 We're pals.
02:15:53.000 We went from someone shit on his porch to we're buds now.
02:15:55.000 Was it a dog that shit on his porch?
02:15:57.000 I have no idea.
02:15:58.000 It wasn't me.
02:16:01.000 Whatever you have to say, who shit on that dude's porch?
02:16:04.000 It wasn't me.
02:16:05.000 It wasn't me.
02:16:05.000 You know you're hanging out with some shady characters.
02:16:07.000 You're right.
02:16:11.000 You're hanging out with some dudes who make some odd choices.
02:16:14.000 Right?
02:16:15.000 Well, I didn't see it.
02:16:16.000 I didn't see it.
02:16:17.000 I have no idea.
02:16:18.000 I was like, I don't, I mean, I said, man, that's a rude thing to do to a person.
02:16:22.000 Right?
02:16:22.000 Shit on their porch.
02:16:23.000 That's about as rude as it gets.
02:16:26.000 So then, we do the fight, and it was fun.
02:16:29.000 We have Sunday Fun Day, and I sent you that video.
02:16:31.000 What was that video you sent me?
02:16:33.000 That was the park and wreck.
02:16:37.000 Holding me at gunpoint.
02:16:38.000 Why?
02:16:39.000 Because they thought...
02:16:41.000 Alright, let me back the story up.
02:16:43.000 Let me get everyone plotted in here.
02:16:45.000 So, I have two labs.
02:16:47.000 Should I send the video to him so we can play it?
02:16:49.000 Can we play the video?
02:16:50.000 I don't know.
02:16:51.000 I mean...
02:16:52.000 Is it legal?
02:16:55.000 What we did was legal.
02:16:56.000 I mean, I don't know.
02:16:56.000 I don't want to get any of those guys in trouble.
02:16:58.000 Alright, so let's not play it.
02:16:59.000 Let's not play it.
02:16:59.000 Okay.
02:17:00.000 It's a pretty outlandish video, though.
02:17:01.000 Yeah.
02:17:02.000 That wasn't me filming because I was too busy losing my fucking mind just like my buddy Mikey.
02:17:06.000 So, my dogs were at the marina loading the boat.
02:17:09.000 Another boat rage incident, of course, because that's what I did.
02:17:12.000 What is boat rage?
02:17:13.000 It's like road rage, but in a boat.
02:17:15.000 But I wasn't raging.
02:17:16.000 My dogs run up.
02:17:17.000 There's this guy.
02:17:18.000 He has two pit bulls.
02:17:19.000 My dogs run up to play with him.
02:17:21.000 Well, this guy starts losing his fucking mind with us.
02:17:23.000 So, it turns out All my guys run over to get our dogs.
02:17:26.000 There was no, like, conversation or any kind of fight or anything, but they grabbed the dogs.
02:17:29.000 The guy starts talking shit, and one of my buddies is like, fuck you.
02:17:32.000 The guy calls 911 and tells him—we didn't know he told him that we were pulling guns.
02:17:38.000 So we pull the boat out.
02:17:39.000 We're wiping it down, cleaning it out.
02:17:41.000 Well, the parking wreck comes in hot, thinking that we have weapons.
02:17:46.000 Right?
02:17:46.000 So— This is the wildest shit ever.
02:17:49.000 We're out there.
02:17:49.000 They're like, put your fucking hands up!
02:17:51.000 We're wearing shorts, no shirts, have no weapons, clearly.
02:17:55.000 Put our hands up, and they start talking.
02:17:57.000 They tell us to turn around and get on the ground.
02:17:58.000 As soon as they tell us to get on the ground, these other two Rangers pull up hot.
02:18:01.000 Jump out with M16s, cock and load, and point the guns at us like crazy.
02:18:07.000 Well, at this point, I lose my fucking mind because there is no reason you need to point a loaded M16 at me like that, right?
02:18:13.000 And, uh...
02:18:16.000 Yeah, so we start yelling and screaming, and in between the scream, whoever the main ranger is kind of takes charge.
02:18:21.000 He's like, just talk to me.
02:18:22.000 Don't worry about what they got going on over there.
02:18:24.000 Meanwhile, they're pointing M16s at us.
02:18:26.000 Right.
02:18:26.000 So I'm like, fuck you, motherfucker.
02:18:28.000 Shoot me, bitch.
02:18:28.000 Like, what the fuck, right?
02:18:31.000 That's the difference between you and me.
02:18:32.000 Right.
02:18:32.000 That's why I start crying.
02:18:33.000 I'm just like, you fucking coward.
02:18:35.000 Like, you going to point a gun on me?
02:18:36.000 I'm in a t-shirt and shorts.
02:18:37.000 Like, fuck you, you piece of shit.
02:18:39.000 Whoa.
02:18:40.000 And he's like, so this is what the...
02:18:41.000 I swear to God, this is what the ranger says.
02:18:43.000 Look at me.
02:18:43.000 Focus on me.
02:18:45.000 Great fight last night.
02:18:46.000 Uh, I need you guys to focus on me.
02:18:48.000 Right, so mid, mid, mid, me fucking telling this dude I'm going to fucking rip off his fucking throat.
02:18:53.000 He says great fight to you.
02:18:54.000 Great fight last night.
02:18:55.000 So are these guys, are they all aware of who you are?
02:18:57.000 Just the one guy is at this point.
02:18:59.000 How does he not tell his friends this isn't some fucking crazy meth head.
02:19:03.000 Right, and we're out there having a good time.
02:19:05.000 I'm not drinking for once in my life.
02:19:07.000 So I'm like sober, running the boat.
02:19:10.000 We're cleaning it at this point, getting ready to...
02:19:12.000 And I explained, like, my dogs got out of this guy's...
02:19:14.000 And so he says, well, they said you have weapons.
02:19:17.000 So he's like, cowboy, do you have guns?
02:19:22.000 And as any true-blooded American, I said, well, of course I have guns.
02:19:27.000 Duh.
02:19:28.000 It's in my truck.
02:19:29.000 So now the story on the other guy's part is looking more...
02:19:33.000 Realistic, right?
02:19:34.000 Like, goddammit, of course I have a fucking gun in my truck.
02:19:37.000 So they get the gun.
02:19:37.000 They run the gun.
02:19:38.000 Of course it's not stolen.
02:19:39.000 I give them my concealed carry.
02:19:40.000 And I'm like, dude, we never wielded the gun.
02:19:43.000 Like, it never got pulled out.
02:19:44.000 It just so happens, dumb luck, that I have a gun.
02:19:47.000 Right.
02:19:48.000 And, uh, I mean, it all worked itself out in the end, but...
02:19:51.000 Cops are in a tricky position right there.
02:19:53.000 Because, like, in one way, like, they don't know what the fuck is going on.
02:19:56.000 They show up.
02:19:57.000 Who the hell knows?
02:19:58.000 Somebody tells you something, you have to show up like that.
02:20:00.000 And I didn't know they showed up thinking that we had guns.
02:20:04.000 So I'm losing my fucking mind.
02:20:05.000 Like, hey man, all this shit in the news, you can't just pull a fucking gun pointing at me saying you're going to shoot me.
02:20:10.000 So I'm losing my mind.
02:20:12.000 And my buddy Mikey is totally off the fucking radar.
02:20:15.000 Like, shoot me walking towards these cops.
02:20:17.000 Oh no!
02:20:19.000 That's not good.
02:20:20.000 It was wild.
02:20:21.000 So in the grand scheme of things, once they told us the guy called and said you guys pulled weapons on him, I see where they're coming from, but it was just fucking outlandish, man.
02:20:30.000 It all worked out.
02:20:30.000 That's so common, though.
02:20:31.000 That's so common.
02:20:32.000 People do that shit all the time.
02:20:33.000 They say you pulled a gun on them.
02:20:35.000 Like, what kind of...
02:20:36.000 And I was telling the cops, like, what kind of...
02:20:37.000 I mean, you can't just do that.
02:20:39.000 You can't just call the cops and say, oh, this guy pulled a gun on me.
02:20:40.000 Well, you should get in trouble if you do do it.
02:20:43.000 It shouldn't be a free pass.
02:20:44.000 You shouldn't be able to say, the guy pulled a gun on me and not go to jail.
02:20:47.000 Yeah, it should be the same.
02:20:48.000 If I pulled a gun, get in trouble, and had the guy...
02:20:50.000 You know, you shouldn't be able to just say, oh, this guy pulled a gun on me.
02:20:52.000 Yeah, well, it's a conspiracy.
02:20:54.000 You're conspiring to tell a false narrative so that you can get a guy in trouble for something you never did, and that guy winds up going to jail.
02:21:00.000 Like, you're a fucking terrible person.
02:21:02.000 You put a guy in jail for something that he absolutely didn't do in the first place.
02:21:05.000 Absolutely.
02:21:05.000 I mean, that's why I had to pray to the couple.
02:21:07.000 I just fought last night.
02:21:08.000 I said, first of all, there's 18 of us on the boat.
02:21:11.000 There's 18 of us sitting here.
02:21:13.000 Like, you really think one guy, we're gonna pull a gun, and there's 18 of us?
02:21:17.000 Like, any scenario you could think of in your life, like, we'd pull a gun?
02:21:20.000 Like, come on, man.
02:21:21.000 That's when the cops are like, eh, you have a good point.
02:21:22.000 They're like, yeah, what are you even talking about?
02:21:24.000 Did you get the guy over?
02:21:25.000 Did they get the guy?
02:21:26.000 No, they wouldn't even bring it up.
02:21:28.000 So...
02:21:29.000 Isn't that weird, too?
02:21:30.000 Like, you can't even just, like, have a man-to-man with the person and go, what are you doing, man?
02:21:33.000 Well, first of all, and then, you can't even have a man-to-man with the cops because you're under punk status right now.
02:21:38.000 Right, of course.
02:21:39.000 Sit down!
02:21:40.000 Everyone on the fucking curb!
02:21:41.000 They just take your humanity away, which enrages me even more.
02:21:46.000 Of course.
02:21:47.000 But they have to do it.
02:21:48.000 They have to.
02:21:48.000 I understand from their standpoint, they have to protect themselves because there's a lot of idiots out there.
02:21:54.000 It's one of those things where there's no winner there.
02:21:57.000 It's a terrible position to be in for both parties.
02:21:59.000 For them, they got lied to.
02:22:01.000 Someone told them you had a gun.
02:22:02.000 They come in thinking about their kids, their wife, their life, their fucking mother.
02:22:06.000 No one wants to see them dead.
02:22:08.000 Someone could shoot them.
02:22:10.000 Who the fuck knows what they're coming to?
02:22:12.000 They're coming to a gun.
02:22:13.000 Someone's got a gun.
02:22:14.000 You see this Chris Brown shit on the news?
02:22:16.000 No.
02:22:17.000 Have you seen this?
02:22:17.000 The cops are surrounding Chris Brown's house.
02:22:19.000 They won't let him out.
02:22:20.000 He's been there since 3 o'clock in the morning.
02:22:22.000 Cops showed up at 3 o'clock in the morning.
02:22:24.000 They're waiting on a warrant.
02:22:25.000 Some woman says he pulled a gun on him.
02:22:27.000 So he's held up in his mansion.
02:22:29.000 Helicopters are flying overhead.
02:22:31.000 I was watching on the news at the gym today.
02:22:32.000 I was like, what the fuck did Chris Brown do?
02:22:35.000 I don't know if he did anything.
02:22:36.000 Some woman says he pulled a gun on him.
02:22:39.000 So...
02:22:39.000 After that happened, he threw a duffel bag out that had weapons and drugs in it, apparently.
02:22:45.000 Oh.
02:22:45.000 Well, that's smart.
02:22:46.000 Yeah.
02:22:47.000 Damn.
02:22:48.000 Well, I, for one, have never thought Chris Brown to be a guy who makes irrational decisions.
02:22:53.000 I look at that gentleman, I'm like, that's the guy that I come to when I'm confused and I need some guidance.
02:22:59.000 I need some guidance.
02:23:00.000 Like you.
02:23:01.000 So maybe he should be my manager.
02:23:03.000 Maybe.
02:23:04.000 How about this?
02:23:05.000 We have many levels of management.
02:23:06.000 Okay.
02:23:07.000 You come to me, I go to Chris Brown.
02:23:09.000 And then we figure it out.
02:23:10.000 We work this shit out.
02:23:13.000 Two duffel bags.
02:23:15.000 With guns.
02:23:17.000 That's hilarious.
02:23:17.000 I swallowed some of that.
02:23:18.000 You gotta spit it out.
02:23:19.000 I got most of it.
02:23:21.000 No, it's already swallowed.
02:23:22.000 I got most of it still stuck in there, but it's hard to keep it in there.
02:23:25.000 I'm a rookie at this.
02:23:26.000 You're a rookie.
02:23:27.000 It's alright.
02:23:27.000 You're a white belt.
02:23:29.000 By the end of this podcast, you're going to be a blue belt.
02:23:32.000 I'll be a stripe.
02:23:33.000 I'll have a stripe on my belt.
02:23:34.000 White belt with a stripe.
02:23:36.000 See, I have nothing against armed forces at all.
02:23:40.000 Of course.
02:23:41.000 That was a video I sent you, and it was fucking outlandish.
02:23:45.000 Crazy.
02:23:45.000 I recognize that it's a hard position to be a cop.
02:23:50.000 Absolutely.
02:23:51.000 With so many knuckleheads out there.
02:23:53.000 You never know.
02:23:54.000 Especially everybody carrying weapons these days.
02:23:59.000 And you know what?
02:24:00.000 Here's the other thing.
02:24:01.000 Here's where it's tough for cops.
02:24:02.000 A lot of cops are Second Amendment believers.
02:24:05.000 So they support the right of a citizen to hold arms, to have guns, and to use them in a responsible and legal manner.
02:24:14.000 It's a lot of cops.
02:24:15.000 They're fun enthusiasts.
02:24:16.000 For my theory on this?
02:24:17.000 Yes.
02:24:17.000 Well, it's not really my theory on them, but it's my theory of how I think they think.
02:24:22.000 So if I'm taking you...
02:24:23.000 Let's go back to scuba diving.
02:24:24.000 Let's use scuba diving as an example.
02:24:26.000 If I take you cave diving with me, right?
02:24:29.000 We're in a cave.
02:24:30.000 You run out of air.
02:24:32.000 Right?
02:24:32.000 So your only source of life is me.
02:24:35.000 Right.
02:24:35.000 So you have to grab my air out of my mouth that we now have to share.
02:24:38.000 But what if you're sucking too much air and using up mine?
02:24:40.000 I have to make the decision.
02:24:42.000 I'm going home to my girlfriend, my family.
02:24:45.000 So I feel like that's the same mentality that they have to come into these situations.
02:24:48.000 Like, they're fucking coming home to their wife and their kids.
02:24:52.000 So when I'm at it, right?
02:24:53.000 Get around the peril.
02:24:54.000 I'm running here.
02:24:55.000 So I'm living.
02:24:56.000 That's what I'm saying.
02:24:57.000 At the end of the day, You already used your app.
02:24:59.000 Motherfucker, you ain't using up mine.
02:25:00.000 Right.
02:25:00.000 I understand.
02:25:01.000 So, that's why I feel like they have to come into these situations like...
02:25:04.000 Listen here, we got called on you, you pieces of shit.
02:25:06.000 I don't know the situation, but in my mind, I'm going home.
02:25:10.000 So whatever that means.
02:25:12.000 And I'm not mad at them for that.
02:25:13.000 I'm not either.
02:25:14.000 I understand that.
02:25:15.000 I understand the survival instinct.
02:25:17.000 And I understand, especially if they don't know you.
02:25:19.000 I assume if you're scuba diving with someone, that's someone who's a really close friend.
02:25:23.000 That would be a real hard issue.
02:25:24.000 It would be.
02:25:25.000 That would be way, way, way harder, in fact.
02:25:27.000 If you show up at some scene and some dude is supposedly assaulted with a deadly weapon, And you're wearing a vest and your gun's drawn.
02:25:35.000 Who knows?
02:25:35.000 Who knows what the fuck's gonna go down?
02:25:38.000 It's hard to talk with this stuff in your lip.
02:25:40.000 But you do know you're coming home to your wife and your kids.
02:25:44.000 Yeah, a lot of dudes make that decision.
02:25:46.000 There's a lot of dudes, I'm sure, though, that would be in that scuba diving scenario and say, I would rather die with my friend than let him die down here.
02:25:53.000 It's tricky.
02:25:53.000 Then don't ever come with me because I'm going home.
02:25:57.000 Don't ever come with me because I'm going home.
02:26:00.000 I'm going home.
02:26:01.000 I know that for sure.
02:26:02.000 I am going home.
02:26:04.000 That is the issue with that cave diving shit.
02:26:05.000 I watched this cave diving thing where they were exploring these ancient Mayan sites.
02:26:11.000 The only way to get to them was going through these caves.
02:26:14.000 And they would go to these caves and find all these ancient Mayan ruins.
02:26:17.000 But they're going through these caves for like hundreds of yards.
02:26:20.000 Hundreds of yards in a cave under the ocean where you're breathing out of a fucking mask.
02:26:26.000 I'm like, oh Christ, I can't.
02:26:28.000 I love it.
02:26:29.000 I fucking love it.
02:26:30.000 I know you do.
02:26:31.000 So I took my buddy.
02:26:31.000 My buddies always ask me if they want to go scuba diving with me.
02:26:34.000 And they want to go cave diving.
02:26:35.000 So I took them up to...
02:26:36.000 We have a cave in the mountains.
02:26:38.000 So I just took them in the cave.
02:26:39.000 Of course you do.
02:26:39.000 We went in with...
02:26:40.000 This is dry.
02:26:41.000 We walked in.
02:26:42.000 We walked into the cave with lights.
02:26:43.000 I made them turn the lights off and find their way out.
02:26:47.000 Like, alright, worst case scenario here.
02:26:49.000 What the fuck are y'all going to do?
02:26:50.000 And they freaked out and everyone had to turn their light on.
02:26:52.000 I'm like, this cannot happen in cave diving because if we're onto the water and we lose our torch or we lose our air, pandemonium is going to fucking break out.
02:27:00.000 Although you guys fail, I'm definitely not going diving with you guys.
02:27:03.000 But just to give them a little touch of what it's like, you really don't know who you are as a person until you're put in one of those positions.
02:27:09.000 You can talk big and bold until you've practiced and been there.
02:27:14.000 Don't you feel the same way about fighting?
02:27:15.000 Mm-hmm.
02:27:16.000 Yeah.
02:27:17.000 Absolutely.
02:27:18.000 I mean, that's one of the weird things about people writing articles about fighting.
02:27:24.000 It's one of the things I've had a real problem with in the past where I've even gone overboard to go after them.
02:27:29.000 I get real angry when people write real disrespectful things about fighters, about their performances, and unnecessarily insulting and not...
02:27:40.000 It's like...
02:27:42.000 We all sort of agree that people that put themselves like first responders, like firefighters, people who put themselves in the line of danger, in front of danger for us.
02:27:53.000 We give them this extra love and respect they deserve.
02:27:58.000 Sure.
02:27:58.000 But when people do dangerous shit for our entertainment, a lot of times people...
02:28:07.000 Rightly so.
02:28:07.000 There's some things that are just fucking ridiculous.
02:28:09.000 There's some ridiculous shit that people do.
02:28:11.000 You know, like parkour people are jumping from building to building.
02:28:16.000 You're like, oh, fucking Christ.
02:28:17.000 By the way, that guy's coming on the podcast, that James Kingston guy.
02:28:20.000 Can you hook him up with me?
02:28:21.000 Because I would love to do that.
02:28:22.000 Me and this motherfucker have been talking.
02:28:23.000 He scares the shit out of me just looking at his Instagram feed.
02:28:26.000 I can't imagine talking to him about stories in person, but...
02:28:31.000 But with fighters, I feel like that's such a...
02:28:34.000 It's a fucking scary, in a lot of ways, it's a noble pursuit.
02:28:38.000 Because it's so goddamn...
02:28:40.000 It's the antithesis of what your instincts tell you to do.
02:28:44.000 Yeah, fight or flight.
02:28:45.000 Yeah.
02:28:46.000 Your instincts are telling you, get the fuck out of this.
02:28:48.000 Don't do this.
02:28:49.000 You could get hurt.
02:28:50.000 This is bad.
02:28:51.000 We don't know what's going to happen.
02:28:52.000 This is open-ended.
02:28:53.000 Anything can go wrong.
02:28:54.000 And you have to prepare for this moment for months.
02:28:57.000 In fact, Really for years, like by the time you get to a point where you're fighting Rick's story, you can't just dive in and fight Rick's story.
02:29:04.000 You've got to fight all these other people along the way.
02:29:06.000 You've got to build up the ability, the skills, and you know there's a confident path in your mind that when shit is going down, you know how to fight and you know how to execute.
02:29:17.000 And you are confident that when you get in there and all that pressure's on you, you can do it.
02:29:22.000 Why?
02:29:23.000 Because you've done it.
02:29:24.000 So for someone who's on the outside, I think it's imperative, really, in this sport, especially when you consider the fact that it's so devastating when a fighter loses.
02:29:34.000 It can define their life.
02:29:36.000 It's very difficult for them to overcome.
02:29:38.000 Very difficult.
02:29:39.000 It's the lowest low you could ever fill.
02:29:42.000 What is the worst loss you ever had?
02:29:44.000 For the title when Dos Anjos got me this last time.
02:29:48.000 I wanted to just turn my phone off and hide, man.
02:29:50.000 It's like the worst.
02:29:52.000 And then you realize...
02:29:54.000 The sun still comes up.
02:29:56.000 And Joe Rogan still calls me.
02:29:58.000 You know, it's like, the world doesn't end, but you feel like it does, man.
02:30:02.000 People love you, they love you if you lose or if you win.
02:30:04.000 There's no way you can know if you're going to lose or you're going to win.
02:30:06.000 Especially, you can't say that you're the baddest.
02:30:08.000 No, winning or losing is just a byproduct of performing well.
02:30:11.000 Yes.
02:30:11.000 Right?
02:30:12.000 Right.
02:30:13.000 And you can't say you're the baddest motherfucker on earth until you meet the baddest motherfucker on earth.
02:30:17.000 And there's the new bad one coming right behind him.
02:30:20.000 There's always.
02:30:21.000 That's got to be the weirdest thing, right?
02:30:22.000 The nipping at your heels.
02:30:23.000 What?
02:30:26.000 How many people are calling out cowboy?
02:30:28.000 Good lord.
02:30:29.000 I love it.
02:30:30.000 I love it, yeah.
02:30:31.000 The more popular you get, right?
02:30:33.000 Yeah, everyone wants a piece of the pie.
02:30:34.000 But do they really?
02:30:36.000 That's my thing.
02:30:37.000 Come get some.
02:30:38.000 But do they really?
02:30:40.000 Or are they just big wolfing until Dana calls them?
02:30:44.000 Like, hey, we heard you wanted to fight.
02:30:46.000 And they're like, ooh.
02:30:47.000 My fucking knee hurts, my ankle.
02:30:50.000 There's a few guys you know definitely want it.
02:30:51.000 Like if you call it Matt Brown, Matt Brown wants it.
02:30:53.000 Absolutely.
02:30:54.000 There's a few of those guys.
02:30:55.000 And that's one of the reasons why win, lose, or draw, Matt Brown always gets massive respect.
02:30:59.000 Sure.
02:31:00.000 You know, even though he just lost to Ellenberger.
02:31:02.000 Props to Ellenberger.
02:31:03.000 It was beautiful.
02:31:04.000 Hell of a knockout, right?
02:31:05.000 Crazy.
02:31:06.000 Powerful.
02:31:06.000 And back against the wall.
02:31:08.000 Lost a bunch of fights in Rome.
02:31:10.000 Ellenberger comes back looking like a fucking monster.
02:31:12.000 He had to reinvent himself.
02:31:13.000 Yeah, and did a lot of training with Nick Curzon, too.
02:31:16.000 You know, Nick Curzon, down at Speed of Sport, who works with Joe Schilling, works with Dos Anjos, works with a lot of those guys.
02:31:22.000 How about Joe?
02:31:22.000 What a fucking stellar dude.
02:31:24.000 Love that guy.
02:31:24.000 Cigarette-smoking, beer-toting motherfucker, right?
02:31:27.000 And just as real as fuck, man.
02:31:29.000 I love him.
02:31:29.000 Him and I, once we met and hung out, we're buds, man.
02:31:34.000 I mean, we just...
02:31:36.000 Yeah, I mean...
02:31:37.000 I feel the same way.
02:31:37.000 Real, real son of a bitch.
02:31:39.000 Right?
02:31:39.000 And a great guy.
02:31:40.000 Yeah.
02:31:41.000 Great guy.
02:31:41.000 He is.
02:31:42.000 He's funny.
02:31:43.000 I know you bring him on here a lot and talk, but he's fucking...
02:31:45.000 He's wild, son of a bitch.
02:31:46.000 I love it.
02:31:47.000 Wild as fuck.
02:31:48.000 Cool to hang with.
02:31:49.000 And you know what?
02:31:49.000 He came in after his last loss.
02:31:51.000 Lost that guy two times in a row by knockout.
02:31:53.000 But he was winning the whole fight until, right?
02:31:55.000 Yep.
02:31:55.000 Fair enough, yeah.
02:31:56.000 But, you know, he came in with a great attitude about it, and I think part of the great attitude about it was losing to him by knockout before.
02:32:03.000 Where it wasn't like, I have resigned myself, I'm not as good as I thought I was.
02:32:08.000 It was, hey man, you fucking lay those chips out, and sometimes...
02:32:11.000 I mean, he was playing the most dangerous game.
02:32:14.000 He was playing just empty the gas tank and attack, and be as aggressive as possible, and he was winning at it.
02:32:20.000 But he got clipped.
02:32:21.000 But he came in with a great attitude about it, man.
02:32:24.000 Great attitude.
02:32:25.000 I don't think very many people appreciate what it takes to go out there and do that, to not play safe, to just fucking put the gas pedal to the floor.
02:32:32.000 I don't think you can.
02:32:33.000 I don't think I can.
02:32:34.000 I don't think anybody can unless you've done it.
02:32:36.000 So you're there watching that.
02:32:37.000 I mean, that's one of the easiest things that someone can do online, like trolls.
02:32:43.000 Trolls.
02:32:43.000 Gotta love them.
02:32:44.000 Gotta love them.
02:32:46.000 In some ways, I get it.
02:32:48.000 If I was 14, I'd probably be doing the same shit.
02:32:51.000 If I was 22, I might have been doing the same shit.
02:32:54.000 Damn.
02:32:54.000 Especially if you're anonymous.
02:32:56.000 Yeah, with a locked account.
02:32:58.000 I've never got on someone's account and just talked just random acts of shit talking.
02:33:03.000 That's the problem with talking shit.
02:33:05.000 It's always done by losers.
02:33:07.000 And that's something that they don't understand.
02:33:09.000 And even guys, there's a lot of guys that talk shit that have actually won some fights.
02:33:13.000 Right.
02:33:13.000 And they've actually had some success, but they know somewhere in their head they're not doing all the right things.
02:33:18.000 Yeah.
02:33:19.000 There's some missing things.
02:33:20.000 There's a difference between talking shit like the way Connor does it, like generating fights and But talking shit online?
02:33:27.000 Come on, son.
02:33:28.000 On your Instagram feed?
02:33:29.000 That's ridiculous.
02:33:30.000 That's ridiculous.
02:33:31.000 I'm with you.
02:33:32.000 So my next fight, I have a little bit of a problem with.
02:33:35.000 For one, I'm a really good friend of them and great guy.
02:33:38.000 But my fucking girl, it's her favorite fighter.
02:33:42.000 Second.
02:33:43.000 Second favorite fighter.
02:33:44.000 Second favorite fighter.
02:33:44.000 Yeah, it better fucking be, right?
02:33:46.000 How fucking wild is that, right?
02:33:50.000 That's pretty wild.
02:33:51.000 But I wish I could handle a situation like that.
02:33:56.000 There you go.
02:33:57.000 Spit it up.
02:33:58.000 I don't know.
02:33:59.000 I just tell her...
02:34:00.000 How many guys have you had a fight that you care about?
02:34:01.000 Ben Henderson, for sure.
02:34:03.000 Great guy.
02:34:03.000 Great guy.
02:34:05.000 Really, that's about it, to be honest with you.
02:34:08.000 Yeah, that I truly care about.
02:34:11.000 Were you friends with him before the first fight?
02:34:14.000 Yeah, just because we grew up on the Ring of Fire and the circuit together.
02:34:16.000 We knew each other.
02:34:18.000 I don't know about friends, but we've become...
02:34:21.000 Friendly.
02:34:21.000 Yeah, we've become great friends.
02:34:22.000 I gave him fucking tickets to the Super Bowl, man.
02:34:24.000 That's pretty awesome, right?
02:34:25.000 That's pretty goddamn good.
02:34:27.000 Thank you, Budweiser.
02:34:29.000 First fight that was on that WEC pay-per-view.
02:34:32.000 Yeah.
02:34:33.000 That was the first fight I called of yours.
02:34:36.000 Yeah.
02:34:37.000 That was a close one.
02:34:40.000 That son of a bitch was rubber band man.
02:34:42.000 I gave him every submission I could possibly think of.
02:34:45.000 He was good.
02:34:46.000 Second one, he just went ahead and choked me out in three seconds.
02:34:49.000 And then the third one.
02:34:51.000 The third one, I won.
02:34:52.000 A lot of people say I didn't win, but...
02:34:55.000 Super close fight.
02:34:56.000 Super close fight.
02:34:56.000 Real close fight.
02:34:57.000 Those fights, man, I honestly believe that the scoring system is ridiculously inadequate.
02:35:03.000 And it's best, like Joe Lozon versus Jim Miller.
02:35:09.000 I watched that again today.
02:35:10.000 I was like, God damn, good luck scoring this.
02:35:13.000 This is a chaotic fight.
02:35:15.000 It's like there's so much going on in the fight like that.
02:35:17.000 How much politics do you think fall into the scoring?
02:35:21.000 I mean, you see the judges, and they're kind of usually elderly.
02:35:24.000 They're not really young guys.
02:35:27.000 How much of...
02:35:29.000 Man, I kind of like Cowboy...
02:35:32.000 I like his vibe.
02:35:33.000 I like his energy.
02:35:34.000 Maybe I'm going to tip the scale a little bit.
02:35:37.000 That's a good question.
02:35:38.000 They could unquestionably be biased.
02:35:40.000 Right?
02:35:40.000 Fans are biased.
02:35:42.000 I'm biased.
02:35:42.000 People are biased.
02:35:43.000 Well, you're definitely biased.
02:35:45.000 Sometimes I have to watch the fights on mute just because...
02:35:48.000 Sometimes you gotta watch the fight on mute and then watch it with Joe Rogan, you're like, wow, he swayed the tick.
02:35:52.000 He tipped the scale on that one for sure.
02:35:54.000 I tried not to.
02:35:55.000 I tried not to.
02:35:56.000 I told you before, man, I'm biased towards you, though.
02:35:58.000 It's a problem.
02:36:00.000 I appreciate it.
02:36:01.000 I'm a legitimate fan, you know, and I try to be as objective as possible, but when things are happening in a fight, you get excited.
02:36:07.000 I think I do my best to do it justice, but I'm not scoring it.
02:36:12.000 I'm trying to be entertaining.
02:36:14.000 Being a commentator is a weird job.
02:36:16.000 How much longer are you going to do it?
02:36:18.000 I don't know.
02:36:18.000 I'm doing it less, and I like it more.
02:36:21.000 Because I'm doing it less.
02:36:22.000 So how do you pick the ones you want to do?
02:36:24.000 Pay-per-view?
02:36:24.000 Only the pay-per-view ones in North America.
02:36:26.000 No more traveling.
02:36:27.000 No more flying from Australia.
02:36:29.000 So I need to get on pay-per-view big shows.
02:36:32.000 Yeah, Vegas, baby.
02:36:33.000 God, I love Vegas.
02:36:33.000 Those are easy.
02:36:34.000 That's a 40-minute flight for me.
02:36:36.000 I love Vegas.
02:36:36.000 Everything's open.
02:36:37.000 That's the worst thing about traveling and fighting, right?
02:36:39.000 You fight.
02:36:39.000 First thing you want to do is eat.
02:36:41.000 Right.
02:36:42.000 And then it's 11 o'clock and everything's closed.
02:36:43.000 Wow, steak.
02:36:44.000 Right?
02:36:45.000 Vegas?
02:36:46.000 Nah, shit.
02:36:47.000 11 o'clock, it's just getting going.
02:36:48.000 Come on in.
02:36:48.000 Come on in.
02:36:49.000 We got foguac.
02:36:50.000 We got ribeyes.
02:36:51.000 Yuck, foguac.
02:36:52.000 Let's talk about foguac.
02:36:53.000 I love that stuff.
02:36:54.000 Really?
02:36:54.000 Goose liver.
02:36:55.000 Love it.
02:36:56.000 Love it.
02:36:56.000 Love it.
02:36:56.000 Yuck.
02:36:57.000 It's yummy.
02:36:57.000 It's good for you.
02:36:58.000 No, neither one of those.
02:36:59.000 It's not good for you.
02:37:00.000 It's not?
02:37:01.000 And it's not good tasting.
02:37:02.000 It's good.
02:37:02.000 It's delicious.
02:37:03.000 Well, I don't know if it's good for you.
02:37:04.000 You probably know more than me.
02:37:06.000 It's way better than the stuff I've had in my mouth.
02:37:08.000 Something that tastes that oily, like a giant booger.
02:37:11.000 Oh.
02:37:12.000 I love it.
02:37:13.000 It's delicious.
02:37:14.000 People are mad that you have to force feed a duck.
02:37:17.000 You have to force feed a goose to make them have their liver.
02:37:20.000 The liver inflates.
02:37:22.000 It gets larger when they get force fed.
02:37:25.000 But meanwhile, you still kill them.
02:37:27.000 It's so bizarre.
02:37:28.000 Like, it's okay to kill them and eat them.
02:37:29.000 But for a while in California, it was illegal to force feed them.
02:37:32.000 I've force fed a couple girls my goose.
02:37:34.000 Ha!
02:37:35.000 Ha!
02:37:36.000 That's not the same.
02:37:39.000 Budweiser.
02:37:39.000 That's it!
02:37:40.000 Enough!
02:37:41.000 That guy's running down the hallway.
02:37:43.000 Did you hear what he said?
02:37:44.000 He's force-feeding girls his goose.
02:37:49.000 God damn it!
02:37:50.000 People get mad.
02:37:51.000 Oh, man.
02:37:52.000 Force feed a goose.
02:37:53.000 I didn't know that was...
02:37:54.000 Here's the thing Anthony Bourdain told me, and then I looked it up.
02:37:57.000 He said they actually gravitate towards the feeding pipe.
02:38:00.000 Like, our idea of what a force feeding is...
02:38:02.000 Like, we think it would be terrible to have someone dump food down your throat.
02:38:05.000 Their throats aren't like our throats.
02:38:07.000 Like, they...
02:38:07.000 Like, it doesn't...
02:38:08.000 It doesn't bother them in a way like...
02:38:11.000 There's some torturous shit that people do with factory farming.
02:38:14.000 Like, making pigs live side by side, crammed in these cages, and cows, and...
02:38:19.000 Living in their own shit.
02:38:20.000 But we don't talk about that because we love bacon.
02:38:22.000 Bacon is good.
02:38:23.000 It's hard to get it from a wild pig.
02:38:25.000 That's the thing about...
02:38:25.000 If you love bacon, you love domesticated pigs, folks.
02:38:29.000 Yeah.
02:38:29.000 The ones that you feed the finisher to and eat the bacon.
02:38:32.000 Fatten them up.
02:38:33.000 Yeah, because if you...
02:38:34.000 Eat a feral, beefy, giant, muscular pig?
02:38:36.000 No, it does not taste like that.
02:38:38.000 Well, you can get bacon out of it, but the bacon...
02:38:40.000 Like, if you see a wild hog's bacon, which is...
02:38:43.000 Bacon is like, it's like what's attached to the ribs.
02:38:46.000 It's like the lower rib area.
02:38:48.000 On a wild hog, that shit is like a quarter of an inch thick.
02:38:51.000 For all of it.
02:38:52.000 And then if you get a side of bacon on a fat domestic pig, that is a fat fucking slab.
02:38:59.000 Because he just lays around.
02:39:00.000 A farrow pig is moving, on the move every day.
02:39:04.000 Hustling.
02:39:04.000 Hustling.
02:39:05.000 Yeah, remember that old pork?
02:39:07.000 It's the other white meat.
02:39:08.000 Remember that?
02:39:09.000 Yeah, it's not with wild pigs.
02:39:11.000 There's nothing white about it.
02:39:12.000 It's dark.
02:39:13.000 It's dark like a deer almost.
02:39:14.000 Are you a pig hunter?
02:39:15.000 Yeah, I love pigs.
02:39:16.000 You know what I like about hunting pigs?
02:39:18.000 Nobody gets mad at you.
02:39:19.000 Yeah, they're like, with a machine gun out of a helicopter if you wish.
02:39:24.000 Please, help me.
02:39:25.000 They don't give a...
02:39:26.000 Pigs...
02:39:26.000 Mow them down.
02:39:27.000 Pigs just fuck.
02:39:29.000 They fuck and they make babies two, three times a year.
02:39:31.000 Okay, why is that?
02:39:32.000 Like, you post pictures of machine gunning pigs down, but if you machine gun a herd of elk, oh, buddy.
02:39:38.000 Oh, man.
02:39:39.000 Right?
02:39:40.000 I mean...
02:39:40.000 Yeah.
02:39:41.000 Well, there's things...
02:39:42.000 Steve Rinella calls them charismatic megafauna.
02:39:45.000 There's like this chain of charismatic large animals.
02:39:49.000 And the biggest one is bears.
02:39:50.000 Like, if you kill a bear, people will be so fucking mad at you.
02:39:53.000 But if you kill a pig...
02:39:55.000 There's a few people that are extremists.
02:39:56.000 They'd be like, any loss of life is horrible.
02:39:58.000 But those pigs, they destroy ground-nesting birds.
02:40:02.000 They decimate populations of them.
02:40:04.000 They kill fawns.
02:40:05.000 There's a crazy picture.
02:40:06.000 Someone was like, why do you say that, man?
02:40:09.000 They don't kill deer.
02:40:10.000 Bullshit!
02:40:11.000 Wild hogs kill everything.
02:40:13.000 There's a crazy picture of a wild boar running off with a fawn in its mouth.
02:40:18.000 And it's a disturbing picture.
02:40:20.000 So I have pigs at home.
02:40:22.000 Domestic.
02:40:22.000 Yeah.
02:40:23.000 And they eat my chickens and roosters all the time.
02:40:26.000 Oh, yeah!
02:40:27.000 If you get fucking within a pig bite away, you'll just see the fucking chickens eating the feed, and the fucking pig will just grab it by the head and eat it.
02:40:35.000 Yeah, look at that.
02:40:36.000 Yeah, that's what my chickens look like.
02:40:37.000 Pig eating a calf.
02:40:38.000 All the time.
02:40:39.000 They eat everything.
02:40:40.000 People don't understand that is a fucking eating machine.
02:40:43.000 That's what a pig is.
02:40:44.000 They give zero fucks.
02:40:46.000 But let's talk about how...
02:40:47.000 So look, that amazing wildebeest is eating a cheetah.
02:40:52.000 That's a wild boar eating a cheetah.
02:40:55.000 And then puts out, you feed a pig anything and out comes bacon?
02:40:58.000 How great is that?
02:41:00.000 Well, you have to get them domesticated and they change everything about themselves.
02:41:04.000 They don't become this sketchy fucking, there's one running off with a fawn in his mouth.
02:41:07.000 Look at that shit.
02:41:07.000 Look, we're on, this is African plains, wildebeest here.
02:41:11.000 Uh, is that?
02:41:13.000 I feel like...
02:41:14.000 I think that's a pig.
02:41:16.000 A feral pig?
02:41:17.000 I think that's your pig.
02:41:19.000 It might be Australia.
02:41:20.000 Visit the page and see what the fuck that is.
02:41:22.000 Yeah, I think that's just a wild boar.
02:41:25.000 See, that's the weird thing about domestic pigs.
02:41:28.000 Is it in Louisiana?
02:41:29.000 Yeah.
02:41:30.000 Yeah, it's just a wild boar.
02:41:31.000 Wild boars, they get that real long snout, but they don't have the same kind of tusks.
02:41:36.000 Wildebeest do.
02:41:37.000 Well, not a wildebeest.
02:41:38.000 Wildebeest is actually like an antelope type species.
02:41:42.000 We're thinking there's a warthog.
02:41:43.000 Warthogs, they have swords that come out of their face.
02:41:46.000 Those giant, huge tusks.
02:41:48.000 That's like the more extreme version of it.
02:41:52.000 But those things that we have over here, that's a warthog.
02:41:54.000 There it is.
02:41:55.000 Look at that motherfucker.
02:41:57.000 Jesus Christ.
02:41:58.000 Look at the hair.
02:41:58.000 Look at his mohawk.
02:41:59.000 Yeah, my friend Remy went over to Africa and shot one.
02:42:02.000 What are the things coming under his eyes?
02:42:03.000 What are the horns?
02:42:04.000 Who knows?
02:42:05.000 Something to keep something from biting its eyes, I guess.
02:42:07.000 Fucking mean.
02:42:08.000 Look how mean that is.
02:42:09.000 It's like gag reflex, so when someone tries to eat your eye, that...
02:42:13.000 That goes in?
02:42:13.000 That dick goes right in your mouth.
02:42:16.000 And they puke up your eyeball.
02:42:18.000 That's a fucking hard-ass animal, man.
02:42:20.000 That looks pretty vicious right there.
02:42:21.000 Fuck yeah, it's vicious.
02:42:23.000 That's a hard-ass animal.
02:42:24.000 You don't grow those kind of tusks on your face because they're pretty.
02:42:27.000 They attract females.
02:42:28.000 That's an animal that knows it has a short window to eat as much shit as it can and hope nothing needs it.
02:42:35.000 Yo, do you know that pigs have spiral dicks?
02:42:38.000 Yeah.
02:42:39.000 Talk about getting screwed.
02:42:40.000 That's where it comes from.
02:42:41.000 Is that what it comes from?
02:42:42.000 Yeah.
02:42:42.000 Oh.
02:42:43.000 They have spiral dicks.
02:42:46.000 So do ducks.
02:42:47.000 We reviewed that in the podcast, and apparently I'd said that ducks have three foot long dicks.
02:42:51.000 I was wrong.
02:42:52.000 This Andreas Antonopoulos, the Bitcoin expert.
02:42:55.000 How could a bird that's only three feet long have a three foot pipe?
02:42:57.000 They have like 13 inch dicks, though.
02:42:59.000 Seriously?
02:43:00.000 Yeah.
02:43:00.000 Oh, they have giant crazy dicks.
02:43:01.000 Look at it.
02:43:02.000 That's a duck dick.
02:43:03.000 So they come in hot.
02:43:05.000 Coming in hot.
02:43:06.000 Because the females have been, like, programmed to try to prevent rape, and the way they have been programmed to try to prevent rape, they develop these, like, labyrinth pussies.
02:43:16.000 Like, look at that in the upper right-hand corner, Jamie, there's a female pussy.
02:43:19.000 Female pussy.
02:43:20.000 As opposed to what?
02:43:21.000 Boy pussy.
02:43:22.000 That's why I get in jail.
02:43:24.000 That's like the inside of a female duck.
02:43:28.000 And they have these little trap doors where the dick can't get through.
02:43:31.000 So they have to allow the dick to get through.
02:43:35.000 And they can actually cut off the breeding process.
02:43:38.000 They can choose what male impregnates them.
02:43:40.000 I feel like that's also in our society.
02:43:41.000 In a lot of ways.
02:43:42.000 It has to be allowed.
02:43:43.000 Yeah, it does.
02:43:44.000 It's super important in this day and age.
02:43:46.000 It can be allowed.
02:43:48.000 We don't have a trap door, but it might be 10 years.
02:43:52.000 But all they do is rape each other in the duck world.
02:43:54.000 They're just biting each other and raping each other.
02:43:56.000 I love hunting ducks.
02:43:57.000 Probably one of my turkeys, pheasants, duck is the order of birds I love to hunt.
02:44:02.000 I've heard that turkey with a bow and arrow is the shit.
02:44:05.000 I love it.
02:44:05.000 You can either center punch it or you can try and guillotine it off with a big...
02:44:08.000 Those crazy...
02:44:09.000 I've missed every time I've tried.
02:44:11.000 You've got to get them really close.
02:44:13.000 You gotta get really close and you gotta get him when he's up clucking, you know?
02:44:20.000 Usually when you draw back, he sees you and they're out of there.
02:44:24.000 I shot the first one that I ever shot last year and it was delicious.
02:44:28.000 But it was a young one.
02:44:29.000 It was only a year old.
02:44:30.000 And Steve Rinell was telling me that a three-year-old turkey is super old.
02:44:34.000 Most of them never live to be three.
02:44:35.000 But I was amazed at how big they are.
02:44:37.000 They're fucking huge.
02:44:39.000 Huge birds.
02:44:40.000 I just went down, I got invited to a hunt on the Realtree plantation down in Georgia.
02:44:45.000 Which I felt like was the butterball form.
02:44:47.000 I feel like they just let a bunch of turkeys out of trap doors and we just smoked them.
02:44:50.000 No, I mean, we hunted for two days before we got one.
02:44:52.000 But you thought that going in?
02:44:54.000 Yeah, I was like, great, this is going to be so easy.
02:44:57.000 They can't do that, though.
02:44:58.000 Realtree is like an established hunting brand.
02:45:00.000 They have to make sure everything's legit.
02:45:01.000 It was fun, you know.
02:45:03.000 We got the birds.
02:45:05.000 They're so good.
02:45:06.000 So good.
02:45:07.000 They taste so much better.
02:45:08.000 I mean, the same thing with wild pigs.
02:45:09.000 They taste so much better than domesticated animals.
02:45:12.000 When you domesticate animals, you fuck up the whole system.
02:45:15.000 But you have to like the game.
02:45:17.000 Do you like lamb?
02:45:17.000 Are you a lamb guy?
02:45:18.000 I do like lamb.
02:45:19.000 You don't like lamb?
02:45:20.000 No, I'm not a big lamb chop guy.
02:45:21.000 Really?
02:45:21.000 Yeah, I don't like the game in it.
02:45:22.000 You don't like gamey food?
02:45:24.000 I don't think lamb's gamey at all.
02:45:25.000 Oh, fuck yes it is.
02:45:26.000 Really?
02:45:27.000 Yeah.
02:45:27.000 Lamb, huh?
02:45:28.000 Maybe you've had it bad.
02:45:30.000 I've had all lamb.
02:45:30.000 There's a restaurant over here in Woodland Hills called Brandywine.
02:45:33.000 If you have a rack of lamb from them...
02:45:35.000 Oh!
02:45:36.000 Game on?
02:45:37.000 Might change your mind, Donald.
02:45:39.000 Alright.
02:45:39.000 You gotta go with someone who's preparing it correctly.
02:45:41.000 Have you had it in a restaurant before?
02:45:42.000 I've had it in a restaurant.
02:45:44.000 I've had it...
02:45:45.000 At my house, everywhere.
02:45:47.000 I've had domesticated lamb.
02:45:48.000 See, I don't know what it tastes like to you.
02:45:51.000 I think that's the weird thing about taste buds.
02:45:53.000 Some people are into weird shit.
02:45:54.000 That's a very good point.
02:45:55.000 I don't know what the fuck they're experiencing.
02:45:57.000 I'm just guessing based on my experience.
02:45:59.000 Yeah.
02:45:59.000 I like really hot foods.
02:46:01.000 Yeah, you like jalapenos and...
02:46:03.000 Habanero peppers.
02:46:05.000 Fuck.
02:46:05.000 I cook with hot shit.
02:46:06.000 And you cook them and piss them off and get them even hotter.
02:46:09.000 It sucks.
02:46:11.000 Yeah, I like them raw, too, though.
02:46:13.000 Sometimes I try the jalapenos raw.
02:46:15.000 I found out that just a little bit of cooking, though, is the way to do it.
02:46:17.000 Yeah, jalapeno raw will give you immediate Johnny Rocket.
02:46:20.000 Yeah, a little bit.
02:46:21.000 Holy fuck.
02:46:22.000 I ate three of them last night.
02:46:23.000 Big fat boys with them genetically modified jalapenos.
02:46:26.000 And it was game on.
02:46:27.000 Yeah, they're like a duck dick.
02:46:28.000 Yeah.
02:46:29.000 It's a big-ass jalapeno.
02:46:30.000 But I... I like hot food, but I don't know what hot food tastes like to other people.
02:46:38.000 I just know what it tastes like to me.
02:46:40.000 But I know there's some shit that I can't tolerate.
02:46:42.000 There was a restaurant that used to be here in Encino, but the dude died unfortunately, but it was called Chili My Soul.
02:46:48.000 And it was an all chili restaurant.
02:46:50.000 And you would go there and they had like the Scoville rankings.
02:46:54.000 Uh-huh.
02:46:54.000 Which goes up to like ten, which is impossible to eat.
02:46:57.000 But they had nines.
02:46:58.000 They had nines and they gave me a cup of nines.
02:47:01.000 And when I say a cup, I mean like a fucking thimble.
02:47:03.000 And I was like, really?
02:47:04.000 And he was like, yeah, really.
02:47:05.000 I go, okay, I'll try it.
02:47:06.000 So you at nine?
02:47:07.000 Yeah.
02:47:07.000 So he goes with just a little spoonful.
02:47:10.000 A dash.
02:47:10.000 And I couldn't fucking believe how hot it was.
02:47:13.000 Sweating.
02:47:13.000 I'm pouring sweat.
02:47:15.000 Like I'm swimming.
02:47:16.000 Why do you sweat when something is hot that you eat?
02:47:18.000 I don't know, man.
02:47:19.000 I like it though.
02:47:19.000 That's half what I like about it.
02:47:22.000 I had the jalapenos, man.
02:47:23.000 I was sweating.
02:47:24.000 It's just pouring like I was in a sauna last night.
02:47:27.000 It's beautiful.
02:47:29.000 Eating your elk that you killed like a man with a bow.
02:47:31.000 Like a man.
02:47:32.000 Like a manly man.
02:47:34.000 Yeah, that's a freak out, man.
02:47:36.000 That's probably my number one addiction right now.
02:47:38.000 You're taking a vacation soon going elk hunting, right?
02:47:40.000 I'm going on a bunch of them.
02:47:41.000 I feel like if I was me, if I wasn't me, and I said, man, if I was that dude, I'd go on a bunch of fucking hunting trips.
02:47:48.000 I'm going on a bunch of fucking hunting trips.
02:47:50.000 I'd give a bunch of meat out to my friends.
02:47:53.000 I eat it all myself.
02:47:54.000 It's all I eat.
02:47:55.000 I very, very, very rarely buy domestic meat now.
02:48:00.000 And if I do, it's because I need to cook something that night.
02:48:02.000 I got some friends coming over, and I didn't defrost anything, and I just got to bang it out quick.
02:48:07.000 Right.
02:48:07.000 For the most part.
02:48:08.000 Or if somebody wants it.
02:48:10.000 But I don't feel bad.
02:48:11.000 I don't feel bad when I eat domestic meat, or like a wild game animal.
02:48:16.000 Why would you?
02:48:17.000 I don't.
02:48:18.000 It's a resource.
02:48:19.000 And a beautiful one, and I respect it.
02:48:21.000 If you were a trophy hunter, and you just went and cut the head off, and you're like, oh yeah, me and Callan got him.
02:48:27.000 Yeah, we got him.
02:48:28.000 We got this leopard, and I'm going to fuck its head.
02:48:30.000 Suck its eyeballs out.
02:48:32.000 Yeah, there's something fucked up about killing things just because you can kill them.
02:48:36.000 Would you hunt a human?
02:48:39.000 Depends on how good they taste.
02:48:41.000 We need to find out.
02:48:42.000 What do you think a human tastes like?
02:48:43.000 Depends on how cunty they are.
02:48:44.000 What do you think a human tastes like?
02:48:45.000 Probably like pig.
02:48:46.000 You think?
02:48:46.000 That's what they say.
02:48:47.000 They call them long pigs.
02:48:48.000 Who's they?
02:48:49.000 People who've eaten them.
02:48:50.000 Cannibals?
02:48:51.000 They call them long pigs.
02:48:52.000 They've actually...
02:48:53.000 And do you think what we eat, like, would I be a little sweeter because I'm a Skittle milked up kind of guy?
02:48:57.000 Probably delicious.
02:48:57.000 Probably delicious.
02:48:58.000 I'm a beer-battered cowboy?
02:49:04.000 Your hams would taste like Wagyu.
02:49:08.000 Wagyu beef.
02:49:11.000 Those fucking cows they feed beer to in Japan.
02:49:15.000 Yeah, man.
02:49:16.000 You probably taste delicious.
02:49:17.000 Well, I know that animals, they eat certain things.
02:49:19.000 Here's a perfect example.
02:49:20.000 Bears.
02:49:21.000 If bears eat salmon, like a friend of mine made a bear ham out of a bear they call a coastal bear.
02:49:27.000 He said it tasted like you were eating smoked salmon.
02:49:30.000 They smoked a ham from a bear.
02:49:32.000 It tasted like smoked salmon.
02:49:34.000 It looked like beef.
02:49:35.000 You would have to taste like what you ate.
02:49:37.000 Because you're putting it right you'd have to.
02:49:39.000 Yeah.
02:49:40.000 The other thing is blueberry bears.
02:49:43.000 Like bears in the fall that are stocking up on blueberries are apparently one of the most delicious things you could eat ever.
02:49:49.000 It's supposed to be incredible.
02:49:51.000 Like guys purposely hunt only in the fall and only over blueberry patches just because they want to catch a blueberry bear.
02:49:58.000 You've never had a blueberry bear?
02:49:59.000 Never had it.
02:50:00.000 It's supposed to be amazing.
02:50:01.000 I haven't either.
02:50:01.000 It's supposed to be amazing.
02:50:03.000 It's supposed to be like one of the most delicious things you can eat.
02:50:05.000 So yeah, I think...
02:50:06.000 And when you cut them open, they smell like blueberries.
02:50:08.000 Like their fat smells like blueberries.
02:50:10.000 Their fat is purple.
02:50:11.000 It's like a purple fat.
02:50:12.000 There's like a video of it.
02:50:13.000 Like Steve Rinella...
02:50:14.000 How many bears have you killed?
02:50:16.000 Three.
02:50:18.000 Did you, like, make a cool necklace out of his claws or anything?
02:50:21.000 I have rugs.
02:50:23.000 I have rugs that I made out of them.
02:50:24.000 Head still attached?
02:50:25.000 Yeah, the head's attached.
02:50:26.000 You have to, right?
02:50:27.000 If you're going to have a bear rug, you have to have the claws and the head on it.
02:50:29.000 It's got to be.
02:50:31.000 People are weirded out by it.
02:50:32.000 I don't think so.
02:50:32.000 I think I'd...
02:50:34.000 That'd be a pretty badass thing to have right in your centerpiece.
02:50:37.000 Well, I eat them, and where I hunt in Alberta, they have to kill them because they don't have no natural predators.
02:50:44.000 This is Steve Rinella doing it on that show Meat Eater, but see how the fat has got like a purple hue to it?
02:50:50.000 Yeah.
02:50:51.000 Yeah, he takes that stuff and he makes lard out of it with that purple fat.
02:50:55.000 Look at it.
02:50:56.000 See how weird it looks?
02:50:57.000 Right.
02:50:57.000 Yeah, that's fat from a bear that's been eating blueberries.
02:51:01.000 See, but we have this fucking Jungle Book view of animals, so people look at bears like your friends, like they're your friends.
02:51:08.000 Bears are all cannibals.
02:51:10.000 All of them are eating cubs, especially the ones that we go after, which are all the males.
02:51:13.000 No kidding, they eat their own cubs.
02:51:15.000 100%.
02:51:16.000 Wow.
02:51:16.000 They all do.
02:51:17.000 They'll eat every cub they could get a hold of.
02:51:18.000 Why not?
02:51:19.000 Why wouldn't you?
02:51:19.000 They just do.
02:51:20.000 Well, I think part of that is because they don't have a natural predator.
02:51:25.000 So I think nature balances itself out.
02:51:27.000 And when there's no natural predator, I think...
02:51:29.000 Something has to evil out.
02:51:30.000 Yeah.
02:51:30.000 And I think what happens is these bears become predators against themselves.
02:51:35.000 And they eat cubs.
02:51:37.000 And they don't want competition with these young males that are coming up.
02:51:39.000 And they also want the female to come back into estrus so they can breed again.
02:51:43.000 So they just eat cubs.
02:51:44.000 And they eat them for food.
02:51:46.000 They're finding now that they actually go actively hunting for him.
02:51:49.000 This is a terrible video of this polar bear killing this cub.
02:51:53.000 And that's the female there next to him, like, don't eat my cub.
02:51:55.000 The female's on the right, and she's trying to keep him off.
02:51:58.000 She didn't help out very much.
02:51:59.000 He's killing her cub right now and eating it.
02:52:01.000 It's so common.
02:52:02.000 It's 100% of the males eat cubs.
02:52:05.000 100%.
02:52:06.000 Could you fucking imagine getting mauled by a polar bear?
02:52:09.000 Oh, man.
02:52:10.000 Well, they're the most fucked up ones because they come out of the womb as predators.
02:52:15.000 Because they don't eat anything but meat.
02:52:17.000 They're the only bear that doesn't eat grass.
02:52:19.000 They don't eat anything else.
02:52:20.000 Look at their environment.
02:52:22.000 They're there to eat seals and other bears.
02:52:25.000 And the way they keep the population down is by eating each other.
02:52:28.000 It's fucked up.
02:52:29.000 And that's a simplistic description of it.
02:52:31.000 I'm sure biologists would be mad at me.
02:52:33.000 But there's definitely merit in what I'm saying.
02:52:35.000 There's got to be.
02:52:36.000 Nature doesn't do that.
02:52:38.000 Wolves don't eat each other.
02:52:39.000 You know, tigers don't eat each other.
02:52:41.000 But wolves have a predator.
02:52:43.000 Exactly.
02:52:43.000 I don't know what predator tigers have other than people, but I think maybe tigers have had people as a predator for so long that it kind of balances itself out.
02:52:53.000 But bears, man, up there by themselves, polar bears, they just eat the shit out of each other.
02:52:59.000 And then a lot of the places where bears are, like even black bears, like they're in these dense wooded areas where nothing other than grizzlies can kill a black bear, other than black bears.
02:53:09.000 So they kill each other.
02:53:11.000 It's a dark existence, man.
02:53:13.000 Circle of life.
02:53:15.000 And for hunting populations, like the people up there that live in Alberta, they need moose, they need deer.
02:53:20.000 It's like a main staple of these people's diet.
02:53:22.000 There's a lot of folks that live up there that don't buy meat.
02:53:25.000 So they have to keep those bear populations in check because they kill more than 50% of all the fawns, of all the moose calves.
02:53:33.000 They're killing everything.
02:53:34.000 Well, just keeping population control in, you know, hunting, like you said, it has to be done.
02:53:40.000 Well, people think it doesn't have to be done, but they don't understand the numbers.
02:53:44.000 It has to be done.
02:53:45.000 You look at the populations of people in this country that die every year from accidents with deer, it's 200. 1.5 million car accidents every year in the United States alone with deer.
02:53:55.000 There's no other way.
02:53:56.000 I mean, there's one solution.
02:53:58.000 They want to reintroduce cougars, which is, yeah, I mean, that'll work.
02:54:02.000 That'll definitely keep the numbers down.
02:54:04.000 It's very tricky.
02:54:05.000 You're bringing in an apex predator.
02:54:08.000 Apex predator.
02:54:08.000 And it only has a finite supply of food.
02:54:11.000 You're going to have to bring in some people that are going to have to control those apex predators, and that's what we have in California.
02:54:16.000 There's a bunch of people...
02:54:17.000 That are professional mountain lion hunters that are employed by the state of California.
02:54:21.000 And when there's a problem, mountain lion, they go and kill it.
02:54:23.000 And it's all hush-hush.
02:54:24.000 They don't talk about it.
02:54:25.000 But they kill 100 of them a year.
02:54:27.000 Wow.
02:54:27.000 And they're all filled with cats and dogs.
02:54:29.000 They've been eating cats and dogs.
02:54:31.000 Yeah, of course.
02:54:32.000 Yeah.
02:54:32.000 Because that's easy.
02:54:33.000 Yeah, it's easy.
02:54:34.000 Easy going.
02:54:35.000 They got them in the backyard, caged up.
02:54:37.000 Why chase a fucking deer?
02:54:39.000 He's got swords growing out of his head.
02:54:40.000 You might break a leg chasing after him.
02:54:42.000 I could just prey down on this dog on a leash.
02:54:45.000 Stupid fat Rottweiler sitting in your yard with no balls.
02:54:49.000 Why'd you take his balls?
02:54:50.000 He makes it nicer.
02:54:52.000 Jack him and carry him over the fence like they're a rag doll.
02:54:55.000 That's an apex predator.
02:54:58.000 Wow.
02:54:59.000 Have you ever seen a mountain lion in the real world?
02:55:01.000 I have.
02:55:01.000 How close?
02:55:03.000 In my old tree fort at my cabin, there was one.
02:55:05.000 I crawled up the ladder and he was in there laying on my blankets.
02:55:09.000 And then he watched me for about a week.
02:55:12.000 Holy shit.
02:55:13.000 So you crawled up there.
02:55:14.000 How old were you?
02:55:16.000 10 or 12 maybe?
02:55:17.000 Oh my god.
02:55:19.000 10 or 12?
02:55:21.000 So you crawl up the ladder, you had no idea.
02:55:23.000 No idea.
02:55:24.000 You get to the top, and what are you looking at?
02:55:26.000 A big-ass cat laying on my blankets.
02:55:28.000 Is he looking at you?
02:55:30.000 Eh, not really.
02:55:31.000 He was just kind of laid out there.
02:55:33.000 And I was like, oh shit, and just went back down the ladder and ran into the house.
02:55:37.000 And then he kind of just sat there for about a week while we were there and just watched us.
02:55:43.000 Oh my god.
02:55:43.000 You just see him in the trees all week long.
02:55:46.000 He didn't move.
02:55:46.000 He just sat there and watched us.
02:55:47.000 Just took over your tree fort.
02:55:49.000 He didn't, little fucker.
02:55:50.000 Oh my god.
02:55:52.000 That's terrifying.
02:55:53.000 That's in South Park, Colorado.
02:55:55.000 Holy shit.
02:55:56.000 And what was he eating while he was living in your tree fort?
02:55:58.000 I think he was waiting on me.
02:56:00.000 Wow.
02:56:01.000 It's holding out.
02:56:02.000 Holy shit.
02:56:04.000 I mean, the tree fort, it wasn't even that high.
02:56:06.000 I mean, I bet you...
02:56:08.000 Eight or ten ladder rungs.
02:56:11.000 Whoa.
02:56:12.000 Up a tree.
02:56:13.000 Holy fuck.
02:56:14.000 Maybe 200 yards from the house.
02:56:16.000 I mean, it was just right there.
02:56:17.000 And how'd you know when he was gone?
02:56:19.000 We went home.
02:56:20.000 I didn't know he was gone.
02:56:21.000 We just left for the weekend.
02:56:22.000 That was it.
02:56:23.000 Family vacation was done.
02:56:24.000 Oh, okay.
02:56:25.000 Yeah, we didn't live there.
02:56:26.000 We just go up there and hang out.
02:56:27.000 Oh, fuck.
02:56:28.000 Fuck.
02:56:30.000 God damn.
02:56:31.000 It's fucking wild.
02:56:33.000 Crazy.
02:56:34.000 I seen a bear.
02:56:35.000 I drove by a fucking massive bear down the four-wheeler trail.
02:56:41.000 He was standing right there next to me.
02:56:42.000 I just drove right by him.
02:56:43.000 I was like, oh shit.
02:56:44.000 I seen a bear chase a kid on a mountain bike.
02:56:47.000 Is this in Colorado?
02:56:48.000 Oh, in Colorado.
02:56:49.000 So these are black bears, right?
02:56:51.000 Yeah, black bears.
02:56:52.000 There's only a few brown bears in Colorado, right?
02:56:54.000 There's not that many.
02:56:55.000 It was definitely a black bear.
02:56:57.000 But I did see a brown bear chase a fucking kid.
02:56:59.000 Really?
02:57:00.000 Yeah, chase a kid.
02:57:01.000 Was it a color phase black bear?
02:57:03.000 It might have been a color phase.
02:57:04.000 I mean, he looked brown and big when I was young.
02:57:06.000 Oh my god, he was chasing a kid?
02:57:08.000 We were out riding our dirt bikes, and there was a little kid on a little 50, like a whole range ahead of us, and you seen the bear fucking hauling ass down the mountain after the kid on the bike.
02:57:19.000 It was insane.
02:57:20.000 Fuck that!
02:57:22.000 Yeah.
02:57:22.000 Apparently, more black bears kill people than brown bears.
02:57:27.000 Apparently black bears are much more likely to be predators on people than brown bears are.
02:57:31.000 It's not impossible that a brown bear would do it, but it's more likely that a black bear would do it.
02:57:35.000 I don't know why.
02:57:37.000 Yeah, I don't know.
02:57:38.000 I've never been attacked by anything like that.
02:57:40.000 Neither incident...
02:57:43.000 It raised a threat to me.
02:57:45.000 Ranello was telling me about this one dude that he knows who took someone he knows on the first hunting trip ever.
02:57:51.000 Right.
02:57:51.000 In the tent.
02:57:52.000 Gets attacked by a 500 pound predatory black bear.
02:57:56.000 Attacks him.
02:57:57.000 Goes in the tent.
02:57:58.000 He's trying to eat him.
02:57:59.000 Grabs his head.
02:58:00.000 The dude's friend comes in, shoots him.
02:58:03.000 Shoots through the bear.
02:58:05.000 Hits the dude in the wrist.
02:58:06.000 Oh shit.
02:58:07.000 So the bullet passes through the bear.
02:58:09.000 Hits the guy.
02:58:10.000 Breaks his arm.
02:58:11.000 Of course.
02:58:11.000 The bear runs out, and then they have to chase the bear down.
02:58:14.000 It runs into another tent.
02:58:15.000 They have to shoot the bear.
02:58:17.000 First hunting trip ever.
02:58:20.000 Well, they got it.
02:58:21.000 They got it.
02:58:22.000 Yeah, I mean, what a story.
02:58:23.000 I've had a backpack.
02:58:24.000 I had a black bear and her two cubs in our camp.
02:58:27.000 We woke up in the morning, unzipped the 10. I just took my.45 and just unloaded it into the sky.
02:58:33.000 That's a good move.
02:58:35.000 And they ran off.
02:58:38.000 Wow.
02:58:38.000 They were right there in our little area.
02:58:41.000 Holy shit.
02:58:42.000 The mamas are the most dangerous.
02:58:44.000 As they say, the mama.
02:58:45.000 Yeah, they say that's the big thing that happens in like Yosemite or Yellowstone, rather.
02:58:49.000 In Yellowstone, when people are tromping around, they're just fuck up.
02:58:53.000 Getting near the cub.
02:58:54.000 Uh-huh.
02:58:55.000 And the mama's like, that?
02:58:56.000 I can just take care of this real quick.
02:58:58.000 Yeah.
02:59:00.000 Let's rip you apart.
02:59:01.000 God, could you imagine fucking getting in a tussle with a bear?
02:59:04.000 We are not equipped for that.
02:59:06.000 No.
02:59:06.000 No.
02:59:07.000 Do you ever see that video?
02:59:08.000 Not even with a spear.
02:59:09.000 I don't even know if you gave me a spear.
02:59:11.000 No.
02:59:12.000 And said...
02:59:13.000 And in the red corner.
02:59:15.000 Right?
02:59:16.000 I don't know.
02:59:17.000 I'd be standing there like, holy fuck.
02:59:20.000 What is this dude doing with his club?
02:59:21.000 I just looked at bear pictures on Google search.
02:59:24.000 This was found on Google Maps.
02:59:25.000 Look at that fat Russian dude just beating the shit out of that bear with a stick.
02:59:29.000 That's Khabib's dad.
02:59:34.000 Holy fuck.
02:59:35.000 Yeah, I don't know what I would do.
02:59:36.000 If you gave me a spear, the guy you're talking about that killed a bear with a spear is impressive.
02:59:41.000 Yeah.
02:59:42.000 Like, what do you do if you're one shot and you blow it and now that motherfucker's like, zoop!
02:59:46.000 Mad at you.
02:59:47.000 Mad at coming in hot.
02:59:49.000 Did he have a sidearm with him?
02:59:50.000 I don't think he did.
02:59:51.000 So my question is, if I go spear hunting with a bear and I unload my spear and the bear mauls me, can I then shoot the bear with a pistol?
03:00:00.000 Yes.
03:00:00.000 You could definitely shoot the bear to stay alive.
03:00:02.000 Stay alive.
03:00:02.000 Yeah.
03:00:03.000 Because of the stay alive.
03:00:04.000 Alberta has an open weapon policy.
03:00:06.000 Like, you can use a rifle, you can use a shotgun, you can use a crossbow, you can use a spear.
03:00:11.000 I think they're going to outlaw spears now because of the outrage, because everybody's pissed.
03:00:15.000 Which I think is honestly a good idea, because most people are not going to be equipped to do it the way that guy does.
03:00:20.000 At the very least, I think if you're going to kill a bear with a spear, you'd have to go through some sort of...
03:00:24.000 Spear-chucking academy?
03:00:26.000 Yeah, well, there should be some sort of a certification course where they know you're competent with a spear.
03:00:32.000 You know, because a spear requires massive physical skills.
03:00:35.000 You have to be strong as fuck.
03:00:37.000 You have to be a person who can throw a lot of weight.
03:00:40.000 It's not as easy as, like, pulling a trigger.
03:00:42.000 There's a lot of physicality involved in killing someone with a spear.
03:00:45.000 Pulling a trigger, I think, is a gutless thing sometimes.
03:00:47.000 Like, you shouldn't just be able to pull a trigger.
03:00:49.000 You should have the passive hunting.
03:00:51.000 I think hunter safety, your shooting aspect should be a little more in-depth.
03:00:55.000 I don't think you should be able to maim a fucking animal.
03:00:58.000 Wing it.
03:00:58.000 That's a good point.
03:00:59.000 You should have to put some groupings together or something.
03:01:03.000 Handgun or rifle.
03:01:05.000 You shouldn't be like, okay, yep, it's not loaded.
03:01:08.000 You fucking know how to put the safety on and you're 12...
03:01:11.000 Go get them.
03:01:12.000 Yeah, I completely agree because when you pass one of those hunter safety courses, what there are is about...
03:01:17.000 I was 10. I was fucking 10. They're easy to pass.
03:01:19.000 But it's questions.
03:01:20.000 You just have to know things.
03:01:21.000 And you have to get 60% of the questions right.
03:01:23.000 Yeah, that's it.
03:01:24.000 That's it.
03:01:25.000 You just gotta get a D. A D. Yeah.
03:01:27.000 And then have fun with your dad and his hunting buddies.
03:01:31.000 Yeah.
03:01:32.000 They're all drunk.
03:01:32.000 They're all trying to burn one of them.
03:01:33.000 One of them's trying to fuck you.
03:01:34.000 There's a way...
03:01:36.000 This is a way to teach people to be competent first before you allow them to do it.
03:01:40.000 I think that's probably the best way.
03:01:41.000 But then people hear shit like that, like, you're infringing upon my rights.
03:01:45.000 I'll teach my son how to do it.
03:01:47.000 I hope you do.
03:01:48.000 I hope you do.
03:01:48.000 I hope we do.
03:01:49.000 But if we're going to regulate it at all, it seems ridiculous to me that you don't regulate competency.
03:01:53.000 Like, people should have a certain amount of ability before they go hunting.
03:01:57.000 Right.
03:01:57.000 Or before they go and shoot a gun at a range.
03:02:00.000 Any kind of...
03:02:01.000 Yeah.
03:02:01.000 ...bearing arms should be...
03:02:02.000 Imagine if they just gave you a car.
03:02:05.000 Like, licenses, do you ask, what's a red light?
03:02:08.000 What's a green light?
03:02:09.000 Yeah, what do you do when you hit a stop sign?
03:02:11.000 And you answer 60% of these questions right, and they give you a car.
03:02:14.000 And that's how you learn.
03:02:15.000 You learn by driving out there in the public.
03:02:18.000 That's kind of what you're doing with guns.
03:02:19.000 You know, someone passes a course, and then all of a sudden they've got a gun.
03:02:23.000 They're just wandering around.
03:02:24.000 Like, you should know how the fuck you use that thing.
03:02:26.000 Yeah, and you go hunting, and then your dad's buddy's like, you got him on a 410?
03:02:31.000 Let's give him a 12-gauge, goddammit!
03:02:32.000 Yee-haw!
03:02:33.000 Right?
03:02:34.000 Now you're 10 with a 12 gauge.
03:02:36.000 Yeah.
03:02:37.000 Yeah.
03:02:38.000 Have fun.
03:02:38.000 Or a 300 wind mag.
03:02:40.000 Just fucking shoot.
03:02:40.000 You know?
03:02:41.000 A 10 year old with a 300 wind mag.
03:02:43.000 Boom!
03:02:43.000 Boom!
03:02:44.000 You just go flying backwards and land on your ass.
03:02:47.000 Yeah.
03:02:49.000 There's a way to do it.
03:02:50.000 It's like meeting in the middle.
03:02:52.000 One of the things about people who are gun rights advocates is they don't want to give up anything.
03:02:56.000 And I understand it.
03:02:57.000 Because they feel like if you give up any ground at all...
03:02:59.000 If you do give up.
03:03:00.000 Yeah, sure.
03:03:01.000 Yeah.
03:03:01.000 They'll...
03:03:02.000 The liberals are going to come in and they're going to want to take all your guns.
03:03:05.000 People who don't have guns don't want anybody to have guns.
03:03:08.000 And people who have guns want everybody to be able to get a gun.
03:03:12.000 I don't know how I'm on the fence on that one, but I carry a weapon everywhere with me.
03:03:18.000 That's what I do.
03:03:19.000 I have one in every vehicle all over my house.
03:03:24.000 You and Tim Kennedy should get together.
03:03:25.000 We do all the time.
03:03:27.000 We do all the time.
03:03:28.000 You know, and I don't know.
03:03:32.000 I feel like I've never had to pull my weapon, ever.
03:03:35.000 But I feel like if I did, I would kill somebody, for sure, if it pushed me to that point.
03:03:39.000 If you were in a position where someone's going to take your life, which happens all the time, it would be wonderful if you could talk someone out of that without having to shoot them.
03:03:46.000 But there's a lot of people that don't want to believe that the scenario does present itself occasionally where you've got to shoot somebody.
03:03:52.000 Absolutely.
03:03:53.000 Yeah.
03:03:53.000 It does.
03:03:54.000 It does.
03:03:55.000 Happens all the time.
03:03:56.000 You can't control...
03:03:57.000 There's a giant...
03:03:58.000 Fucking population on this planet.
03:04:01.000 And amongst those people, you are going to run into the wrong motherfucker sometimes.
03:04:04.000 Whether it's some Ted Bundy character, or whether it's some fucking school shooter, or whether...
03:04:09.000 Who knows?
03:04:10.000 You just don't know.
03:04:11.000 And this idea that you shouldn't be prepared, and we should pretend that those people don't exist, that's...
03:04:17.000 That's just as unhealthy as someone thinking that everyone should be armed everywhere they go.
03:04:22.000 We should all have guns laying on the table.
03:04:24.000 That's just as unhealthy.
03:04:25.000 All of it's crazy.
03:04:27.000 There's a lot of people here.
03:04:30.000 We definitely need to work on being nicer to each other.
03:04:34.000 Being nice to each other, and me and Aubrey talked about this, I think mutual combat should be a thing that is allowed.
03:04:40.000 That's in Seattle.
03:04:41.000 Because fucking road rage puts me over the edge.
03:04:45.000 Motherfucker, I will lose my mind.
03:04:47.000 Do you know why that is?
03:04:48.000 Why that is?
03:04:49.000 Yeah.
03:04:49.000 Why road rage exists?
03:04:51.000 They've actually made a scientific explanation that actually makes sense.
03:04:55.000 When you're driving in a car, things are happening at split seconds.
03:04:58.000 So you're in that car, people are changing lanes, you're moving...
03:05:01.000 60 miles an hour, which, I mean, how many feet a second is that?
03:05:04.000 You're flying by, right?
03:05:05.000 And it requires you to be tuned in.
03:05:08.000 Your senses are very tuned in.
03:05:09.000 And because of that, anytime something happens, you're on red alert.
03:05:13.000 So you're engaging with people on red alert.
03:05:16.000 Fuck you!
03:05:17.000 Like, you're in that car, and you're already so ramped up.
03:05:20.000 By the time you get out, you're, like, ready to go to war.
03:05:22.000 And people that are, like, normally calm, they get in those situations, and they're so fucking ramped up.
03:05:27.000 So ramped up.
03:05:28.000 Yeah, that's what it is.
03:05:30.000 It's dealing with that.
03:05:31.000 Or we should allow it to be done.
03:05:33.000 Well, I agree.
03:05:34.000 Motherfucker want to pull you over, you should pull over and figure it out.
03:05:37.000 Instead of pull over and then...
03:05:39.000 Shoot each other.
03:05:40.000 Shoot each other.
03:05:41.000 There'd be a lot of those people honking their horn if you got to beat the shit out of somebody.
03:05:44.000 That's true.
03:05:45.000 They'd be like, yeah, all right, maybe not.
03:05:47.000 Go ahead, go ahead and cut in.
03:05:48.000 Talk a lot up until the time the door's shut and they're standing outside.
03:05:52.000 Yeah.
03:05:52.000 And then maybe they try to talk their way out of it, or talk their way out of you being scared.
03:05:58.000 But there's a state, Washington State has a law, a mutual combat law, where you could do it in front of cops.
03:06:04.000 Do you know that crazy dude, Phoenix Jones, who's an MMA fighter?
03:06:08.000 I don't know him.
03:06:09.000 You don't know who he is?
03:06:10.000 This is a crazy story.
03:06:12.000 He's a legit MMA fighter.
03:06:13.000 Very talented kid.
03:06:15.000 Is he Carlos Fodor's brother?
03:06:19.000 Phoenix Jones.
03:06:20.000 Anyway, he wears a fucking superhero outfit, and he goes out and fights crime.
03:06:25.000 Real life.
03:06:26.000 Yeah, and there's a video of him on a street fight in front of cops.
03:06:30.000 Because Washington State says, do you want to fight?
03:06:33.000 Do you want to fight?
03:06:33.000 Okay, you guys are allowed to fight.
03:06:34.000 So you can smoke pot and fight.
03:06:35.000 Yeah, look at this.
03:06:36.000 So this is this guy.
03:06:38.000 He's got this outfit on, and this dude's talking shit to him.
03:06:42.000 Is this the...
03:06:43.000 Do you have any warrior bars right here?
03:06:45.000 See, I don't, man.
03:06:46.000 I don't.
03:06:46.000 I got some other shit.
03:06:47.000 So the guy talks a bunch of shit, and then he tries to walk away, and the guy's like, oh, you're fucking pussy.
03:06:53.000 So eventually he winds up fighting this guy in front of cops.
03:06:57.000 Do you have to find a cop first?
03:07:00.000 No.
03:07:00.000 You can agree upon it, but the cops won't intervene.
03:07:03.000 So you could say this is mutual combat.
03:07:05.000 Yeah, so look at this.
03:07:06.000 There's a cop car, so the cops are watching.
03:07:08.000 This is hilarious.
03:07:09.000 By the way, this is real fucking recent.
03:07:13.000 And this dude, Phoenix Jones, whatever his real name is...
03:07:16.000 So no weapons, you just say...
03:07:17.000 No weapons.
03:07:18.000 No weapon, mutual combat.
03:07:19.000 Yeah.
03:07:20.000 And so the cops let him do it.
03:07:22.000 See if he can get to the actual fight itself, because it's hilarious.
03:07:25.000 Does he whip his motherfucking ass?
03:07:26.000 Oh, leg kicks the shit out of him right off the bat.
03:07:28.000 And the dude's like, wait, what?
03:07:29.000 A little bit before that.
03:07:31.000 Here he goes.
03:07:32.000 So they go at it.
03:07:33.000 He goes, yeah, fuck you.
03:07:34.000 He's like, okay, okay.
03:07:35.000 He's dressed like a superhero, which is even more humiliating than he kicks your ass.
03:07:38.000 So they start going at it.
03:07:40.000 They're standing there in front of the cops.
03:07:41.000 Look at this.
03:07:42.000 Yeah.
03:07:42.000 Whack!
03:07:43.000 Right away!
03:07:44.000 Ho ho!
03:07:44.000 Leg kick!
03:07:45.000 And then he's bouncing, moving on him, and the dude's like, wait, what?
03:07:48.000 Whack!
03:07:49.000 Leg kick again!
03:07:49.000 Oh, shit!
03:07:50.000 Oh, he got a kick back!
03:07:54.000 He's bouncing around on him.
03:07:55.000 He's throwing jabs to the body.
03:07:57.000 And is that the cop right there?
03:07:58.000 Yep.
03:07:59.000 Off to the right, watching?
03:08:00.000 Yep.
03:08:00.000 Why?
03:08:00.000 Because if it goes to the ground, it's over?
03:08:02.000 I don't know, man.
03:08:03.000 I think in case the guy quits.
03:08:05.000 I guess if the guy quits, the cop has to be there to say, well, then it's assault after that.
03:08:10.000 It's no longer mutual combat.
03:08:12.000 Look, he's just kicking the shit out of his leg.
03:08:15.000 Dude's moving forward in a zombie state now.
03:08:18.000 He doesn't know what the fuck's going on.
03:08:19.000 And then the beating comes down.
03:08:20.000 And then the cops step in and separate it.
03:08:22.000 And say, okay, that's enough.
03:08:23.000 And then they're like, have a good night.
03:08:25.000 Yeah, good night, sir.
03:08:26.000 No police report.
03:08:27.000 Exactly.
03:08:28.000 No paperwork.
03:08:28.000 Look, he's doing it in front of the cops.
03:08:30.000 Washington State has some crazy mutual combat law.
03:08:34.000 How do we get that passed across the board?
03:08:36.000 It would stop a lot of fucking Jabberjohn.
03:08:39.000 Oh my god, would it?
03:08:41.000 Oh man, wait.
03:08:43.000 There's a lot of people that say things they don't really mean, you know, and they open up possibilities they don't really want to take place.
03:08:50.000 Because alcohol.
03:08:51.000 Yeah.
03:08:52.000 They get froggy.
03:08:53.000 Exactly.
03:08:54.000 And then when someone says jump, now all of a sudden they gotta jump.
03:08:56.000 Well, that's why pot's better.
03:08:57.000 But because that guy got so froggy, he actually jumped and he didn't even know how to jump.
03:09:01.000 Which is the most ridiculous thing.
03:09:03.000 In front of a cop.
03:09:04.000 On camera.
03:09:05.000 At least you can take an ass-whipping.
03:09:07.000 The description of what happened here is kind of interesting.
03:09:09.000 Who wrote this?
03:09:10.000 Just somebody?
03:09:10.000 I think it's whoever shot the video.
03:09:12.000 Oh, he said, F-U-N-word.
03:09:14.000 He was going to walk away and leave, and the guy said, I'll fight you, I'll take it to your house.
03:09:18.000 And then that's when he went to the cop and was like, alright, we're going to fight then.
03:09:20.000 At this point, Phoenix agrees to mutual combat.
03:09:23.000 The two shake hands and the fight commences.
03:09:29.000 He says, fuck you, I'll bring this to your house.
03:09:33.000 Yeah, and right before he beats the shit out of the dude, the dude says, you know you don't want none of this.
03:09:41.000 Oh, that's hilarious.
03:09:44.000 Mutual combat.
03:09:45.000 Yeah.
03:09:46.000 Well, that can only exist in, like, them Wild West states.
03:09:49.000 Like, you could get that off in Arizona.
03:09:51.000 Maybe New Mexico could pull something like that off.
03:09:53.000 They could pull that off.
03:09:54.000 That would never make it to California.
03:09:56.000 California wouldn't be a mutual state?
03:09:57.000 They'd be like, we have to stop violence.
03:09:59.000 Or you have the guys pulling the guns.
03:10:01.000 You have both sides.
03:10:02.000 You have both sides, yeah.
03:10:03.000 We have, like, a lot of people that came over here to grow sprouts and do yoga.
03:10:08.000 I don't think there's going to be much mutual down in Compton.
03:10:12.000 No.
03:10:13.000 No.
03:10:14.000 They have to learn how to fight first.
03:10:17.000 If you don't know how to fight, that's when the guns come out.
03:10:21.000 I wonder if Mutual Combat...
03:10:23.000 Allows weapons if you both have weapons.
03:10:25.000 No, I think that's not in the rules.
03:10:28.000 That's murder.
03:10:29.000 Have you seen that shit they're doing in Russian now?
03:10:31.000 M1's having knight fights?
03:10:32.000 Knife fights?
03:10:33.000 Knight.
03:10:34.000 Like knights.
03:10:35.000 You dress up like a knight, armored, and swords and shit.
03:10:37.000 What?
03:10:38.000 Yeah, I put it on my Twitter.
03:10:39.000 I mean...
03:10:40.000 I retweeted it today.
03:10:41.000 A fucking guy got KO'd by a sword.
03:10:44.000 To the face.
03:10:45.000 Dude, you gotta see this shit.
03:10:46.000 They hit each other in the head.
03:10:47.000 They're wearing armor.
03:10:49.000 How heavy is a knight outfit?
03:10:50.000 It looks heavy as fuck.
03:10:52.000 They're not moving very well.
03:10:53.000 I would bet it's heavier than that.
03:10:55.000 Like, look at this.
03:10:56.000 They're jacking each other with these fucking swords.
03:11:00.000 They're like modern night.
03:11:01.000 Oh, and the shield to the face?
03:11:03.000 Yeah.
03:11:04.000 Well, there's some full speed versions of it, Jamie.
03:11:07.000 Look how they're whacking each other, man.
03:11:10.000 So are they blunt swords, you think?
03:11:12.000 I think so.
03:11:13.000 I think they're probably blunt.
03:11:14.000 Behind the legs is not...
03:11:17.000 Oh, we need...
03:11:18.000 Behind the legs isn't guarded.
03:11:20.000 I'd be going for...
03:11:20.000 Oh, look at this.
03:11:21.000 He got a takedown.
03:11:22.000 Takedown.
03:11:23.000 I mean, this would be real life if that would happen.
03:11:26.000 Yeah.
03:11:27.000 Oh, shielding him while he's down?
03:11:28.000 Fuck yes!
03:11:29.000 Oh my god, shielding him in the head.
03:11:30.000 This is insane.
03:11:31.000 When did the ref stop it?
03:11:32.000 No, I guess they stopped it.
03:11:34.000 He did on his own.
03:11:35.000 He was like, okay, you are dead.
03:11:38.000 Yeah.
03:11:39.000 Wow, he's trying to tap on the ground.
03:11:41.000 He's done.
03:11:42.000 Wow, man.
03:11:43.000 That is crazy.
03:11:45.000 There's no rules.
03:11:45.000 Where they're fighting looks awesome, too.
03:11:47.000 Yeah, they're in a field.
03:11:49.000 Yeah, it looks like a place where people would fight with swords.
03:11:52.000 They're in the Shire.
03:11:53.000 The Shire!
03:11:54.000 Oh, hell yes.
03:11:55.000 Look at him.
03:11:56.000 Look at his face beat up.
03:11:57.000 Oh, yeah, man.
03:11:58.000 He took some swords to the head.
03:12:00.000 That is a fucked up sport.
03:12:02.000 That's a tough dude right there.
03:12:03.000 This is next level shit, right?
03:12:05.000 I mean, this is...
03:12:06.000 Oh, do it.
03:12:06.000 Sign me up.
03:12:08.000 I don't even know how to yield a sword, but I'll do it.
03:12:10.000 So if this starts happening in the United States, you're down?
03:12:14.000 What the fuck is this, Jeremy?
03:12:15.000 Oh, they have maces and...
03:12:16.000 Five on five.
03:12:17.000 Come on.
03:12:18.000 Five on five sword fights?
03:12:18.000 Come on!
03:12:19.000 Oh my god, this is insane.
03:12:21.000 Then he has an axe!
03:12:22.000 Oh my god.
03:12:23.000 Look how big that guy is.
03:12:26.000 I don't even want to hear it.
03:12:28.000 Oh, he has an axe.
03:12:28.000 This is insane.
03:12:29.000 He has a real life axe.
03:12:31.000 That's the only way to fight a guy with an axe.
03:12:32.000 Grab my...
03:12:32.000 Oh, what?
03:12:33.000 Look at the other guy hitting him in the head!
03:12:35.000 To the head!
03:12:35.000 Oh, shit!
03:12:37.000 This is insane.
03:12:38.000 He's dead.
03:12:39.000 He killed that dude.
03:12:39.000 He hit that dude in the head with a fucking axe.
03:12:41.000 What is this?
03:12:42.000 What do you look up for this so people can fucking do this?
03:12:47.000 IMCF? 2015 5-on-5 France vs.
03:12:51.000 New Zealand.
03:12:52.000 They have night fights.
03:12:53.000 This is a new thing.
03:12:54.000 Dude, those guys had axes and maces.
03:12:57.000 And they hit that dude in the head with an axe many times.
03:12:59.000 Seven times.
03:13:00.000 Yeah, right.
03:13:01.000 He's dead.
03:13:03.000 What the fuck, cowboy?
03:13:04.000 Oh, man.
03:13:06.000 Jesus Christ.
03:13:07.000 He got in trouble there because he put the blade to that dude's throat.
03:13:09.000 Yeah, you're not allowed to do that.
03:13:11.000 Boom!
03:13:11.000 Jump kick and then put it to his throat.
03:13:13.000 Oh my god, you can't do that.
03:13:15.000 And he said, dude, you can seriously not cut his head off.
03:13:17.000 The referee, stop!
03:13:18.000 Too violent!
03:13:20.000 How long before two dudes dress up in samurai outfits with no fucking armor and go at it with a sword?
03:13:28.000 How can you take an axe to the head six times?
03:13:30.000 You can't, obviously.
03:13:32.000 The guy went down.
03:13:33.000 Down, but I mean, how come there's no blood?
03:13:36.000 Well, I think because of his helmet.
03:13:37.000 I want the mace.
03:13:38.000 Look at the mace.
03:13:38.000 Oh, but this is so crazy.
03:13:40.000 They're fighting for points, too, and somehow they scored a point, and then they restarted.
03:13:43.000 So you can't stab.
03:13:44.000 I haven't seen any stabbing going on, because I feel like that would be my move.
03:13:47.000 Well, here's what's unrealistic about it.
03:13:49.000 In the real world, if people were fighting like this, they would be stabbing each other.
03:13:53.000 For sure.
03:13:54.000 So these fights would be quicker.
03:13:55.000 So there's something about using these blunt objects and not being able to stab each other that makes it almost more ridiculously brutal.
03:14:04.000 This is a crazy fucking sport.
03:14:05.000 Look how big that dude is.
03:14:06.000 That's the mountain.
03:14:08.000 This is awesome.
03:14:09.000 They tackle each other?
03:14:11.000 I think when you're down, you're down.
03:14:13.000 Yeah, he seems confident.
03:14:14.000 I wouldn't be confident if I was in the war.
03:14:16.000 I'd be thinking that guy's gonna stab me in the dick.
03:14:18.000 Yeah, I gotta get up now.
03:14:20.000 How crazy would war be?
03:14:21.000 How fucking crazy would old time war be?
03:14:24.000 Old time, barbarian style, sword, maces.
03:14:28.000 If you're the guy and you're choosing, what would be your weapon?
03:14:32.000 Oh, for sure.
03:14:33.000 For sure.
03:14:34.000 Sitting on the ridge, sniping.
03:14:36.000 Imagine being the guy like, yep, grabbing your maces, just like you walk into the Onnit Academy, and you're like...
03:14:42.000 10, 12, 20, or the fucking three-headed 30-pounder.
03:14:47.000 And you're like, that's mine.
03:14:49.000 Would he have six good swings out of you?
03:14:51.000 Maybe.
03:14:52.000 Especially if you're a guy who doesn't train.
03:14:54.000 He probably weren't really training that much.
03:14:55.000 And then you're fatigued.
03:14:57.000 And dying.
03:14:58.000 And then some dude's cutting your head off.
03:15:00.000 And you get to see that sword right when it hits your neck, then you go into the afterlife.
03:15:04.000 You're six.
03:15:05.000 You're six.
03:15:05.000 Good.
03:15:07.000 You're lifting people off their feet.
03:15:08.000 What is this?
03:15:09.000 The ridiculous final.
03:15:10.000 21 versus 21?
03:15:12.000 21. U.S. versus Russia.
03:15:13.000 Look at the tiny pig pen they have him in.
03:15:17.000 This is insane, dude.
03:15:18.000 Oh, U.S. is here?
03:15:19.000 Oh my god.
03:15:21.000 Battle of the Nations, it's called.
03:15:22.000 Man, I hate to tell you, but I just don't think the U.S. is going to do very well.
03:15:25.000 Against Russians?
03:15:26.000 Well, I mean, I just don't know if U.S. has much knight...
03:15:31.000 Jesus Christ.
03:15:32.000 Lineages, do we?
03:15:33.000 No.
03:15:34.000 We don't have a lineage in knighting.
03:15:35.000 Zero, right?
03:15:36.000 Zero.
03:15:36.000 But does Russia?
03:15:37.000 Do they have a lineage in knighting?
03:15:40.000 I don't know.
03:15:40.000 I think I'd want to be on the Scottish or the English team.
03:15:44.000 Yeah.
03:15:45.000 Braveheart style.
03:15:46.000 Braveheart style for sure wins every year.
03:15:49.000 I mean, when you look at MMA and how crazy MMA is in comparison to boxing and how people have embraced it, this is like...
03:15:57.000 If they figure out a way to regrow limbs...
03:16:00.000 If they figure out a way where 100% if you get your arm cut off, they can grow that bitch back.
03:16:06.000 People are doing this, man.
03:16:07.000 Yeah, but you can't regrow your heart back or your head.
03:16:10.000 That's true.
03:16:11.000 You can't stab them in the heart.
03:16:12.000 You can't cut their head off, but you can cut their legs off.
03:16:14.000 So that would be like a three-point stance or no kicks to the dick.
03:16:19.000 No eye gouges.
03:16:20.000 No heart piercing and no head chopping.
03:16:22.000 Yeah, that would be the rules.
03:16:24.000 But you can cut a guy's arm off.
03:16:25.000 And they immediately seal it up real quick, and they rush him to the hospital.
03:16:28.000 You won by KO. Cut his arm off.
03:16:31.000 Or can you still fight?
03:16:32.000 They grow him a new arm.
03:16:33.000 I feel like I'd still fight.
03:16:33.000 And a couple weeks later, he's at the press conference with a little baby arm.
03:16:36.000 He's like, fuck cowboy.
03:16:38.000 Next time.
03:16:39.000 As soon as my arm grows back, I'm going to kick his ass.
03:16:41.000 Right now I've got a little baby arm.
03:16:42.000 This motherfucker's getting bigger every day.
03:16:44.000 You think in movie, arm grow back.
03:16:47.000 Do you think it comes back little to big?
03:16:49.000 I think it's like a sprout.
03:16:52.000 It's how it has to grow.
03:16:54.000 It has to stretch out and grow.
03:16:56.000 Yeah, that's what I would think.
03:16:58.000 Along the way.
03:16:59.000 Like an alligator arm.
03:17:00.000 Like an alligator doesn't just grow.
03:17:02.000 The whole thing doesn't just pop out.
03:17:04.000 They start slowly.
03:17:06.000 They regrow theirs?
03:17:06.000 Yeah, they regrow theirs.
03:17:08.000 No shit, I didn't know that.
03:17:09.000 Scary ass fuckers.
03:17:10.000 Gators.
03:17:11.000 They're so scary.
03:17:12.000 Lizards regrow their legs.
03:17:14.000 Wow.
03:17:14.000 I gotta love gators.
03:17:15.000 Those are my friends.
03:17:16.000 I call them gators.
03:17:18.000 Hang out on the boat, eat all the food, drink all the alcohol, and when it comes time to fill that bitch up, their little arms can't reach their wallets.
03:17:25.000 Oh, those kind of...
03:17:25.000 That's like T-Rex arms.
03:17:26.000 It's the gators.
03:17:27.000 But you can't make shoes out of them.
03:17:28.000 No.
03:17:29.000 They're not as cool.
03:17:30.000 Not as cool at all.
03:17:31.000 The gators, baby.
03:17:32.000 Gators, when I was a kid, I used to live in Florida.
03:17:34.000 We lived near Lake Alice in Gainesville, and alligators were endangered when I was a kid.
03:17:40.000 Yeah, like they were telling people not to feed them because people throw marshmallows in the water.
03:17:45.000 Why do they like marshmallows so much?
03:17:46.000 I don't know.
03:17:46.000 They love them though.
03:17:47.000 And the gators would eat the marshmallows, but it was cool to do.
03:17:49.000 We would get marshmallows and throw them in the water.
03:17:51.000 And then they started telling you can't do it.
03:17:52.000 They don't digest them well.
03:17:54.000 Like these are in danger.
03:17:55.000 We have to take care of them.
03:17:56.000 And then from then on, they just slowly but surely overwhelmed to the point where like, okay, you can hunt them.
03:18:02.000 Okay, you can shoot 500 of them a year.
03:18:04.000 Like they have tags where 500 alligators can get killed by one dude.
03:18:10.000 500. 500. That's some serious hunting.
03:18:12.000 Yeah, that's some serious hunting.
03:18:13.000 That's one and a half a day.
03:18:14.000 Yeah, every day.
03:18:16.000 Well, they only have a season, so they're doing way more than one a day.
03:18:18.000 But they're doing a bunch of different ways.
03:18:20.000 They're doing lines, they put lines in the water with hooks.
03:18:22.000 So what's the line thing?
03:18:23.000 They swallow a hook, is that what's going on, and then they're just...
03:18:26.000 And they thrash around, you shoot them in the head.
03:18:27.000 Right, but they're essentially on a hook in their belly.
03:18:30.000 Exactly.
03:18:31.000 You ever see swamp people?
03:18:32.000 I do, but I just didn't ever grasp, like, does the hook them in the mouth or is it in their gut?
03:18:36.000 It's sometimes in the mouth.
03:18:37.000 It's like fishing.
03:18:38.000 Sometimes, I mean, if you have a line for a catfish, you lay out a line.
03:18:43.000 Like, a lot of times you'll catch them and they're barely hooked.
03:18:46.000 Sometimes you catch them and they're hooked deep.
03:18:48.000 So that's the same thing they do.
03:18:50.000 And then they pull them in and they shoot them.
03:18:51.000 But they can shoot 500 of...
03:18:53.000 I was watching that swamp people show.
03:18:55.000 And the guy had a tag limit of 500 alligators.
03:18:59.000 What does a gator pay?
03:19:01.000 That's a good question.
03:19:02.000 And what do they do with the gator besides make bitchin' ass booze for me?
03:19:04.000 They make bitchin' ass booze for you.
03:19:06.000 They make...
03:19:07.000 I mean, do you eat gator?
03:19:08.000 Yes.
03:19:09.000 Apparently, it's the highest in protein.
03:19:11.000 It's higher than moose.
03:19:12.000 I mean, I've been to Papados.
03:19:13.000 I've been to Papados.
03:19:14.000 And you can get an appetizer alligator.
03:19:17.000 But you're getting some frozen bullshit, which you really want to do, apparently, according to all the people I know.
03:19:21.000 In New Mexico, I think it's fresh alligator, but...
03:19:23.000 My friend John Dudley is an alligator hunter.
03:19:25.000 He hunts alligators occasionally.
03:19:27.000 And he shoots them with a bow and arrow.
03:19:28.000 And he says that they're delicious if you get the gator tail like right after the gator dies.
03:19:34.000 It's delicious.
03:19:35.000 It's super lean.
03:19:36.000 You don't cook it very long.
03:19:38.000 It's like one of those things you cook it like, you know, I guess you'd have to cook it like a pork.
03:19:43.000 I don't know.
03:19:43.000 I wonder if they get trichinosis like a pig does.
03:19:46.000 That's a good question.
03:19:47.000 I'm sure they live in a nasty swamp.
03:19:49.000 Yeah, but I wonder if they're, like, susceptible to it.
03:19:52.000 Because, like, when they eat it, I wonder if their body breaks it down the same way our body does, or a pig's body does, or a bear, or even a mountain lion.
03:19:59.000 That's where all the cases of trichinosis come from.
03:20:02.000 But when they do that, apparently it's delicious.
03:20:05.000 When you take an alligator, a freshly killed alligator, it's supposed to be really...
03:20:08.000 And super high protein.
03:20:10.000 Higher than even, like, moose.
03:20:12.000 Really?
03:20:12.000 Higher than bison.
03:20:13.000 Higher than anything.
03:20:16.000 It's supposed to be good.
03:20:18.000 500 a tag.
03:20:19.000 And how many tags are given out?
03:20:21.000 I don't know.
03:20:21.000 It's a good question, but they're trying to get rid of them.
03:20:23.000 Is there 10 guys with 500 apiece, or is there...
03:20:25.000 I mean, what's the...
03:20:26.000 It's a good question.
03:20:27.000 I don't know, but I know that there's a surplus.
03:20:30.000 There's too many alligators.
03:20:32.000 Like, they're everywhere.
03:20:33.000 Whenever I'm down wakeboarding in Florida, I see them all the time in the water with us.
03:20:36.000 Like, God damn it.
03:20:37.000 Yeah.
03:20:38.000 Gator'd.
03:20:38.000 Did you see that one video where that fucking gator walked on the golf course and it's a 15-footer?
03:20:43.000 Jesus.
03:20:44.000 We can't show it because those fucking people, they got my Facebook pulled down.
03:20:48.000 Whoever owns that- For gators?
03:20:50.000 For putting that video up.
03:20:51.000 Why?
03:20:51.000 They claimed it was their video or something.
03:20:53.000 They linked a YouTube video or something.
03:20:56.000 Oh, that's why.
03:20:57.000 They're trying to make money off of it.
03:20:58.000 But look, we can see it.
03:20:59.000 Look at that thing, walking across the golf course.
03:21:01.000 Look how big that is.
03:21:03.000 That's the gator from Hook.
03:21:04.000 That's the gator from Hook.
03:21:06.000 It's so huge.
03:21:06.000 And you get it into perspective when the guy comes into the focus in a little bit, because the guy's filming this, and then in a few minutes, the dude walks out.
03:21:13.000 See, now you understand how big it is when you see that guy in front of it.
03:21:17.000 No, I understood how big he was when he walked past the huge sand trap.
03:21:19.000 Look how tall he is, too.
03:21:20.000 That's what's weird, is how long they're And he hangs out at hole nine in the little pond.
03:21:28.000 Florid is so fucked up.
03:21:29.000 Dude, look how big he is.
03:21:31.000 How old is he?
03:21:32.000 That's got to be an old alligator.
03:21:35.000 Wow.
03:21:35.000 I don't know how old he is, but he's been eating a lot of dogs.
03:21:39.000 Wow!
03:21:40.000 Yeah.
03:21:42.000 Yeah.
03:21:43.000 I would eat that.
03:21:44.000 You'd eat him?
03:21:45.000 Fuck yeah.
03:21:46.000 How do you kill a gator?
03:21:47.000 Shoot him in the head.
03:21:47.000 You gotta shoot him in the head.
03:21:48.000 It's gotta be a headshot.
03:21:49.000 Yeah, it's gotta literally be, there's a very small area you're shooting at too.
03:21:53.000 Like right behind the eyes.
03:21:54.000 With a bow and arrow?
03:21:55.000 You could do it, yeah.
03:21:56.000 Same, same.
03:21:57.000 Yeah, that one though, man.
03:22:00.000 Goddamn.
03:22:00.000 There's another angle on him.
03:22:01.000 Look how big he is.
03:22:02.000 Look at his mouth.
03:22:03.000 Look at his fucking tail.
03:22:05.000 I mean, it doesn't even look real.
03:22:07.000 Like, if that was in a movie, you'd be like, fuck that.
03:22:09.000 That's not real.
03:22:10.000 Lake Placid.
03:22:11.000 That's the Lake Placid alligator.
03:22:12.000 How much does he need to eat to sustain...
03:22:16.000 That little walk he's doing.
03:22:17.000 Oh my god, I would imagine.
03:22:18.000 Two dogs a day?
03:22:19.000 I would imagine they eat a lot of fucking things.
03:22:21.000 Oh, he's done.
03:22:21.000 That was it.
03:22:22.000 Game over.
03:22:23.000 Sonnen.
03:22:23.000 Lays out.
03:22:24.000 What the fuck?
03:22:25.000 How close does this guy get up to him?
03:22:26.000 This is insane.
03:22:27.000 People are living right next to dinosaurs.
03:22:31.000 That's a fucking dinosaur.
03:22:33.000 Look at the tail on that thing.
03:22:34.000 My God.
03:22:36.000 That is an insane animal.
03:22:38.000 What do you think?
03:22:39.000 15 feet, does it say?
03:22:40.000 Yeah, they said it's 15 feet.
03:22:42.000 They estimated.
03:22:43.000 Wow.
03:22:44.000 Easily 15 feet.
03:22:45.000 It's an enormous...
03:22:46.000 That's the high end.
03:22:48.000 That's like the one percenter of alligators.
03:22:50.000 Yeah.
03:22:51.000 That's impressive.
03:22:53.000 Let's bring this bitch home, Donald Cowboy Cerrone.
03:22:55.000 So I think we've worked out a few things.
03:22:57.000 We have.
03:22:58.000 One, stay at 170 pounds.
03:23:01.000 I'm your new manager.
03:23:02.000 And then we go straight from me to Chris Brown.
03:23:05.000 To DMT. That's important.
03:23:08.000 And America.
03:23:09.000 America.
03:23:10.000 Tell Budweiser to relax.
03:23:13.000 Don't eat this.
03:23:14.000 Don't swallow it.
03:23:16.000 Any man should not swallow.
03:23:18.000 Definitely don't swallow that.
03:23:20.000 Just don't be scared of oysters.
03:23:25.000 Other than that, I think we covered it.
03:23:27.000 We got it.
03:23:28.000 This was fun, man.
03:23:29.000 We got to do this more often.
03:23:30.000 I had a great fucking time.
03:23:31.000 Anytime.
03:23:32.000 Donald Cowboy Cerrone, ladies and gentlemen.
03:23:34.000 You can catch him on Twitter, Cowboy Cerrone.
03:23:36.000 Catch him on Instagram, Cowboy Cerrone.
03:23:39.000 Have his next fight, 205. Madison Square Garden.
03:23:43.000 Is that what's going to happen?
03:23:43.000 For sure?
03:23:44.000 Is that all?
03:23:46.000 We'll be able to tell you soon.
03:23:47.000 Allegedly.
03:23:47.000 Allegedly.
03:23:48.000 Exactly what it is.
03:23:49.000 But it's going to be epic.
03:23:50.000 Epic.
03:23:51.000 Epic.
03:23:52.000 Thank you, brother.
03:23:53.000 It was awesome.
03:23:54.000 I enjoyed it.
03:23:54.000 We out of here.
03:23:55.000 Good night, everybody.