Michael Knowles Vs Matt Walsh ｜ FACE-OFF： Catholic Edition
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
157.38173
Summary
Who's the Better Catholic? Matt Walsh or Michael Knowles. The Daily Wire hosts a Catholic face-off to determine who's the better Catholic. Who's better at trivia and who's better with theology?
Transcript
00:00:00.000
You know, here at the Daily Wire, we've had many inter-faith battles.
00:00:12.600
And I believe he's styled as a minor deity himself.
00:00:18.140
Never have we had an intra-faith battle, but we get this question all the time.
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People ask, who's the better Catholic at the Daily Wire?
00:00:25.540
Which is very confusing, because in the Catholic faith, we're so concerned with guilt that, you know, in a way, like the worst Catholic is kind of the best Catholic.
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In any case, we are going to finally take up this listener question.
00:00:46.900
Yeah, let me just, I just want to say for the record that I, just to be totally honest, I turned down this bit like three times.
00:00:57.580
They asked me months ago, and I said, I don't want to do that, because I'm terrible at trivia, and I'm about to get demolished here.
00:01:03.900
And I, I, I do not agree with the premise, which is that if you don't know trivia, then it means you're a bad Catholic.
00:01:12.400
The best Catholic is the person who hates themselves the most.
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So, I already won, but now we're going to find out who knows more trivia.
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So, I, that's why I kept saying, nah, can we do a different, but, but they, they kept coming back.
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We're going to, um, Drew's going to, he's, he came up with the questions, even though he's not Catholic.
00:01:33.880
He, he came up with the Catholic trivia questions.
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And, uh, we're going to play those, and then we're going to have 30 seconds to write down our answers on these, uh, whiteboards.
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So, that's, that's the one good thing is we have these, uh, I've always wanted to do a thing where I write answers on whiteboards.
00:01:48.640
And we'll write our answer on the white, whiteboard.
00:01:50.620
And then, um, and then at the end, the loser has to what?
00:01:55.520
The loser reads an ad for the winner on their social media platforms, I take it.
00:02:05.260
I, I, I haven't brushed up on my theology recently, but I think, I guess the winner gets their ad read on the platform.
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All right, we're here with the Catholic face-off to determine who is the better Catholic, Matt Walsh or Michael Knowles.
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It's Matt Walsh, but we still have to ask the questions and go through the motions.
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In January, 1959, Pope John the 23rd, uh, that's, I think that's what XX111 means,
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shocked the world when he announced the creation of this ecumenical council.
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And the answer is Vatican II, or as Knowles calls it, the great transgression.
00:03:09.460
This famous Catholic, who holds two Academy Awards for the same film in 1996, has been quoted as saying,
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God is the only one who knows how many children we should have, and we should be ready to accept them.
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One can't decide for oneself who comes into this world and who doesn't.
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Yeah, I don't, I actually don't know who that is.
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How many famous Catholics are there with Academy Awards?
00:03:51.420
I guess I'll, I'll go with the only one I can even think of.
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Yeah, I don't like my answer at all here, but I'm, also my writing is illegible, so I have that going.
00:04:05.880
I assume he is, because he's Italian, so I just assume that he's Catholic.
00:04:08.840
That's Mel Gibson, who forgot to mention, you're only supposed to do it with one wife.
00:04:15.480
See, I, I didn't even realize that Robert De Niro, I, or Mel Gibson, I thought he was some sort of weird sect.
00:04:21.920
He, yeah, he's kind of trended a little bit like, uh, more, uh, the term is Sede Vacantis, you know, in, in recent years.
00:04:28.520
But he, you know, the reason I thought it might be Gibson is because, you know, he's pretty, pretty traditional.
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And, uh, that statement where it's basically like have as many kids as you can, that's pretty, that's pretty trad.
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In 1981, the Vatican Observatory set up a second research center for astronomical observation in this American city.
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I do, I do like that the Vatican is just, after they gave up the papal states, they're just coming in and like pulling off different pieces of other countries, including our own.
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The answer is Tucson, Arizona, and anyone who doesn't know that, of course, uh, has to spend time in purgatory.
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I chose basically the dumbest place to put it, an observatory for, which would be New York.
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I chose Austin, Texas, because I know there is an observatory there, but I visited it.
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And I have to tell you, it, it was very hipster.
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Until the papacy moved to the Vatican in 1377, the Pope resided at this location on the other side of Rome.
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I'm just going to name the only other place I can even think of.
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It's hard to read, but, um, I wrote it very, I wrote it very quickly, but that's, it actually says Lateran Palace right here.
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In fact, yeah, I wrote it in several different languages all at once.
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To be the Pope's bodyguard, an applicant must be Catholic, single, male, between the ages of 19 and 30, at least five feet, eight and a half inches tall, and a citizen of this country.
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And, of course, to wear that outfit, you have to be gay.
00:07:00.100
So, this is going about as well as I thought it would.
00:07:02.340
This is the whole reason I didn't want to do this bit?
00:07:07.760
Well, you, you did get Lorenzo's Bar and Grill or whatever the answer to the last one was.
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In ancient times, scribes copied books by hand on scrolls and paper, or printmakers printed text from hand-carved wooden blocks before this Catholic inventor's creation changed the world.
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This is one of the most important people that's ever lived.
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I need to have at least one point on the board here.
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In 2006, Cardinal Ercilio Tonini denounced this former Catholic's upcoming music tour as a blasphemous challenge to the faith and a profanation of the cross.
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Because I want to say Bono, but he still considers himself Catholic.
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In 1961, the government of Brazil declared this Catholic a national treasure.
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Yeah, I don't, I don't, I'm, I'm thinking of like old historical figures, but I just don't, I don't think any of this is right.
00:09:02.900
I drew one of those cool, fancy S's that, uh...
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I was going to say Cortez, because I think that'd be, that was before political correctness came in and ruined everything, but no.
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Born in 1473, this Catholic astronomer practiced medicine without a medical degree.
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So I didn't finish writing it, but I did get the COP.
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I think it's pretty clear, unless I was talking about someone else.
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I'm not, I'm talking about like, like a buddy cop movie, Bell Gibson again?
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Coppola was born in 1473, that's, that's some Bush League stuff, guys.
00:10:02.720
Unless, okay, if you can prove that he went by the nickname cop, if people just talk, hey cop, what's up, man?
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That is, I, I'm gonna pro, I'm taking this up to the judicial authorities of this game.
00:10:15.000
What is the only historically black and Catholic university in the United States?
00:10:24.680
What is the only historically black and Catholic university in the United States?
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Hang on, I got, no, I just got a, I got a text real quick.
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Historically black and Catholic university in the United States.
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The, the sad thing is I'm cheating right now and I still can't find the answer.
00:11:01.720
You, you could have given me like all the time in the world.
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It didn't immediately come up in the Google results, so.
00:11:12.420
What was the greatest distance from Vatican City where communion was taken?
00:11:23.320
What was the greatest distance from Vatican City where communion was taken?
00:11:28.140
I don't, what, I don't understand the premise of the question.
00:11:38.220
So it, it would be, I think, this is going to come down to some serious definitions.
00:11:46.420
Wait, greatest, greatest distance from, am I the only one dumb enough to not even understand
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what the question is supposed to be asking here?
00:11:52.040
Where communion, where the communion was given and received, how far from Vatican City that
00:12:00.240
So it has to be, the question has to be about wordplay, right?
00:12:05.380
It's, it's, uh, so who, who was furthest, farthest away from Vatican City when they received
00:12:11.120
I think, I think I actually do have the answer to this.
00:12:27.120
This Scientologist went back to her Catholic roots after divorcing her movie star husband.
00:12:51.820
What did you, I said Kate Cruz because I forgot her last name, but I thought it would be trad to
00:13:00.560
Used to be Scientologist and I assume she was Catholic, but.
00:13:03.760
I actually think she didn't go back to Catholicism though.
00:13:06.300
I think she's like stayed with some like kind of weird, weird view.
00:13:12.820
What are the five countries with the largest population of Catholics?
00:13:41.200
The answer is Brazil, Mexico, the Philippines, the United States, and the country of Michael
00:13:54.640
I got U.S., Brazil, and, uh, what was the only, Mexico?
00:14:04.860
What country has the largest percentage of Catholics by population?
00:14:29.000
It's technically, I believe the country is actually, isn't the country called the Holy
00:14:35.220
Back when, back when there was good political power and, you know, uh, the Holy See had the
00:14:39.740
papal states, there were, there were even more people, but I guess the percentage was
00:14:44.500
Third century Bishop Saint Denis is known for his beheading and consequent carrying of his
00:15:00.540
Yeah, I, you know, it reminds you that it, it doesn't matter how far you go, it's the
00:15:06.160
Okay, well, I've just got one completely, just a total dartboard guess.
00:15:19.220
I guessed Syria, because it sounded kind of like...
00:15:23.500
It says something about our, uh, cultural perceptions, I think.
00:15:28.420
How many books does the Catholic Bible include?
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Oh man, I'm going to get, I'm definitely going to get this wrong.
00:15:57.260
Yeah, do we get any relative points here, or is that, ah man, that's brutal.
00:16:02.100
And the bonus question, how many are in the Protestant Bible?
00:16:06.620
See, this is a trick, because if you get it right, then you lose a point.
00:16:16.700
I think I know what Matt is thinking of right now.
00:16:20.700
It's 66, because we're going to read out the true ones.
00:16:24.380
I'm actually ashamed to have gotten that right.
00:16:30.860
I should really lose all the points for getting that right.
00:16:33.520
What denomination is the lord of the multiverse, Andrew Klavan?
00:16:37.260
Oh, we're kind of giving this one away, haven't we?
00:17:12.180
I wrote Eglinton too, but I have no idea at all.
00:17:20.240
The better Catholic is, of course, Matt Walsh, but Noel's got more answers right.
00:17:27.120
I am even more sure that I was right to begin with about this whole idea.
00:17:38.280
You know, at the very least, we were both able to demonstrate our embarrassing ignorance
00:17:46.240
That's that's and then it adds to the guilt and the shame, which makes us better Catholics
00:18:14.240
There are many things about it that you might enjoy.
00:18:19.320
If you were to watch it, if you were to watch it or even say, listen to it, we could watch
00:18:32.820
Sometimes there are some who would watch and then listen to it.
00:18:38.820
Both at the same time is the Michael Knowles show is a great, great show.
00:19:07.680
Make sure, by the way, that everyone out there in the Internet's lands sends in your next
00:19:15.240
thoughts for the next highly contentious, serious, high stakes face off.
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The Daily Wire hopes you're having a terrific Christmas holiday.
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We will be back January 4th with new episodes of The Michael Knowles Show.