Action4Canada - Homeschooling with Durenda Wilson - August 22, 2023

00:00:00.000 All right, I'm going to get started here. I'm just going to do a little screen share. I think most of you know who I am. I'm Doris Livingstone. I'm the parent homeschool parent support lead with Action for Canada.

00:00:16.080 So over here on our Action for Canada website, I just want to show you about our chapters across the country. And I'm just going to move this black toolbar. Okay, so resources.

00:00:32.720 I'm assuming you can all see this, right? Okay, so scroll down here. And Action for Canada chapters. It shows a great big beautiful map of our country. And so you will see where Action for Canada is positioned.

00:00:54.720 And this is a way to help people at the local level understand what's happening to our country with all the social issues coming at us. And so if you want to get in touch with them, you can scroll down and pick your province and then it'll show you the cities with emails attached to that. So have a look at that.

00:01:21.160 Also, our resources, you want to go to resources again, and then this is how you find anything homeschool. And first of all, our parent webinars are right here. This is what you're doing right here right now. And you've signed up, you can share this with people this link as well, you want to register in advance. Here's today's webinar.

00:01:44.500 And then if you go down further, you'll see what we've done already last spring. And we've got history and education of homeschooling that was with Israel Wayne, and some of his contacts and his books, how you find them.

00:01:58.260 And Tanya Gaw, our founder with Action for Canada gave us an in depth report on SOGI, sexual orientation, gender identity in Canada. And then we've talked about multiple, how do you homeschool multiple kids? Some of you have, I think anything more than three, you want to figure out how to do that.

00:02:24.860 And then Peter Stock, this was a really good one with HSLDA Canada, that's Homeschool Legal Defense Association. We had a great conversation about what homeschooling is in Canada, the growing movement, and they are an organization you want to tap into HSLDA.ca to find out your homeschool laws in your province and also get legal protection if you need any of that.

00:02:52.860 Definitely worth having a membership there.

00:02:56.860 Definitely worth having a membership there. I highly, highly support you do that. So you can just scroll down and watch the end of those. I'm just going to go back to the top here, back to resources. This is how I do it.

00:03:05.860 I go to the parent resources and over here is the homeschool link. This is how you find me.

00:03:18.860 This is really important, not so much about me, but you want this directory, the homeschool association directory, you can go through this page. But if you want to know how to find support in your province,

00:03:33.860 and you want to know the laws of your province, you want to find and click your province. So like Alberta looks like it's an alphabet. No, maybe not alphabetical order. No, that's okay. Find your province.

00:03:47.860 And click on so here online that would be Alberta, and they've got contacts there. There's other ones for Alberta, and they will help you find your local support groups answer questions on how to get started curriculum.

00:04:02.860 And the laws of your province, and the laws of your province. I'm going to talk real quick right now. I'm just going to get out of the stop share here.

00:04:11.860 So I'm back. And I know a lot of you have are right on the edge of pulling your kids, you haven't quite made that decision. And you wanted to know how to actually pull your child.

00:04:23.860 And I think the most important thing is get a piece of paper and write down why you want to do it. You need to know your why. And when you know what you why you do that, when you have those days, where you're second guessing yourself, or it's nothing you imagined.

00:04:43.860 And you're doubting and you're doubting and having rough days, you want to go back to why you want to homeschool and it's a way to hang in there.

00:04:52.860 And yeah, that's number one number to understand your provinces homeschool rules and laws.

00:05:00.860 It's pretty simple.

00:05:02.860 I'm in British Columbia, and all we have to do is, if the child is currently in a school, we notify them that they're not coming back.

00:05:12.860 You can offer the information that you're going to homeschool, but they don't even need to know that the only thing that's required is you have to register them at any school in BC.

00:05:23.860 So on that page that I showed you where the homeschooling contacts are, you can scroll down and there's more links there about like in BC, you can see the different schools that are very homeschool supportive.

00:05:41.860 They offer programs for homeschools. That's the only thing legally Ontario is, I think, simpler than that.

00:05:48.860 So it's really pretty simple.

00:05:50.860 Quebec might have a little bit more issues, but it does work.

00:05:55.860 There's lots of successful homeschooling in Quebec.

00:05:58.860 And so you want to make sure you talk to your provincial homeschool association leaders and HSLDA Canada.

00:06:06.860 Go to their website.

00:06:07.860 It'll break it down there, too, and you can even phone them.

00:06:10.860 They're so, so helpful there.

00:06:13.860 The other, the third thing is probably the greatest thing is you want to find your people, you want to get support.

00:06:20.860 You want to find the local people.

00:06:23.860 And so a lot of the provincial groups have broken it down regionally, and then they can break it down even more.

00:06:30.860 And you want to find their Facebook groups, their activity list for the week, different sports programs and music classes and art classes that are homeschool friendly that want homeschoolers to come.

00:06:47.860 It's actually huge.

00:06:49.860 And if you live remotely, and I did, I raised my kids in a small town of 1800.

00:06:56.860 We actually created our own group.

00:06:59.860 We, we couldn't rely on anybody outside of us.

00:07:02.860 We were an hour and a half from anybody.

00:07:04.860 And we had 35 kids that were homeschooling and we created our own programs.

00:07:09.860 So that is another way.

00:07:11.860 But having support and not feeling alone and not feeling isolated is really, really crucial.

00:07:17.860 I just wanted to show you on my screen share again, a book that may be helpful.

00:07:25.860 And I'm just going to showcase it here.

00:07:30.860 Not that one, this one.

00:07:34.860 It's on the Canadian homeschooler.com website, and it's called how to homeschool in Canada.

00:07:43.860 And she's done a great job breaking it down.

00:07:46.860 And if that's a resource that you want to pick up, just go to that website that Canadian homeschooler.com.

00:07:55.860 All right, so we're going to move on now and introduce our speaker, Dorenda Wilson.

00:08:02.860 And I tell you, she's going to be loaded with very, very encouraging things to share with us to help us on our journey.

00:08:10.860 Dorenda Wilson is a trusted homeschool expert with 25 years of experience homeschooling her own eight children.

00:08:19.860 She is an author, speaker and podcaster who offers a better way and promises that you already have what it takes to give your child a healthy, successful future.

00:08:30.860 Dorenda is a strong voice and advocate for a simpler, more unhurried lifestyle as well. 0.62

00:08:37.860 The three books that she authors are called The Unhurried Homeschooler and The 4-Hour School Day and The Unhurried Grace from Mom's Heart.

00:08:52.860 All three can be found on Amazon.ca and or .com, but CA for Canada.

00:08:59.860 And I found that The 4-Hour School Day is also at Christianbook.com.

00:09:04.860 So you can find them there.

00:09:09.860 In today's webinar, we're going to be discussing her book, The 4-Hour School Day, how you and your kids can thrive in the homeschool life, especially for those of you who are starting.

00:09:20.860 So we want to welcome Dorenda.

00:09:23.860 Thank you for having me.

00:09:26.860 It's an honor to be here.

00:09:28.860 I'm excited to be able to encourage parents in this wonderful adventure of homeschooling.

00:09:34.860 It's wonderful to have you here.

00:09:36.860 And I know you're way out there in North Carolina.

00:09:38.860 So we're coast to coast right now, a few hours apart.

00:09:42.860 Yes, we are.

00:09:44.860 Let's talk about your book, The 4-Hour School Day.

00:09:47.860 You talk about parenting with the big picture in mind.

00:09:50.860 What do you mean by that?

00:09:52.860 And why is it so important?

00:09:54.860 Okay, well, parenting with the big picture in mind means having a vision for the future.

00:10:00.860 Now, that doesn't mean that we're deciding what our kids are going to do in terms of their careers and their future and all of that.

00:10:07.860 But rather, we understand our privilege and responsibility to teach and train our children toward what is right and truthful and beautiful and good.

00:10:18.860 It means that we're investing now in ways that move our kids toward being productive, healthy adults who engage in meaningful work.

00:10:29.860 And so that requires work on our part, and it requires that we're willing to be inconvenienced now for the good of our children.

00:10:39.860 And I think that when it comes to homeschooling, you said it beautifully, we need to know our why.

00:10:45.860 That is absolutely important.

00:10:47.860 Why are we homeschooling?

00:10:48.860 One of the things that I'm noticing, the difference between when I started over 28 years ago, most of us who were homeschooling, we weren't running away from anything.

00:11:00.860 We were running towards something.

00:11:02.860 But I'm seeing because of, and rightfully so with everything that's going on, many parents are running from something.

00:11:08.860 And I think that's good.

00:11:09.860 I think they should be running from those things.

00:11:12.860 But also, don't forget to run toward something.

00:11:16.860 What are you running toward?

00:11:18.860 One of the things that we did at the very beginning was exactly what you mentioned, just writing out what we would call a mission statement.

00:11:26.860 It does not have to be like a long, detailed document.

00:11:29.860 It could be very, very simple.

00:11:31.860 And I'll just give you an example by sharing ours because, just to give you an example of how simple it really can be.

00:11:39.860 One of our first goals was that we would encourage and raise lifelong learners, which makes sense, right?

00:11:50.860 Because if your children are lifelong learners, they can pivot at any time to learn something new in order to do what they need to do.

00:11:59.860 And so that's something that is not being taught in the traditional school system.

00:12:05.860 And it is actually discouraged in so many ways it's hampered because of the way that things are taught and the forced teaching of things that aren't meaningful to kids.

00:12:16.860 And I'll talk a little bit more about that in a minute.

00:12:19.860 But basically, we do.

00:12:20.860 We want to raise kids who love to learn.

00:12:23.860 The second thing is that we wanted to raise kids who were resourceful.

00:12:28.860 So you can want to learn, but you have to know how to find out what it is that you need to know, right?

00:12:34.860 We wanted our kids to be resourceful.

00:12:36.860 That was number two.

00:12:37.860 Number three, we wanted them to have a strong work ethic because if they have the first two things, but they don't have the strong work ethic, they're not going to get nearly as far.

00:12:48.860 And then the fourth thing for us, because we're a family of faith, and this was the most important thing that was weaved throughout all of our other mission goals was that we wanted our kids to have a relationship with the Lord, we wanted them to know their God, we wanted them to, to love him to serve him and in doing so they would be loving and serving others as well.

00:13:10.860 So that was our basic mission statement.

00:13:14.860 Now, you can sit down and write this mission statement, but it can change.

00:13:18.860 I will say that because sometimes we start out with something that we think is important and we realize down the road there was something else that's more important that you want to replace that with.

00:13:27.860 So don't feel like you're stuck, but it is important to have some sort of framework that you're working from because it's going to help you decide does this curriculum fit into our mission for our kids.

00:13:40.860 Does this activity that we think we want to participate in does it does it serve this mission, so we want to be intentional that's the whole idea behind a mission statement.

00:13:51.860 And this is another reason it's important to have the big picture in mind is that we want to be intentional we don't want to get distracted and we don't want to be diverted from our mission and I think we live in a world that is just wrought with distraction.

00:14:08.860 And so we have to be bold, we have to be courageous, we have to be intentional, we have to be focused.

00:14:15.860 So for the good of our children for the good of our homeschooling journey because if we allow ourselves to be sucked into every shiny new thing that comes along.

00:14:23.860 We're going to be just it's going to be chaos and and that's what we don't want we want our homeschooling to be anchored and we want it to be intentional.

00:14:33.860 And there was a question that I asked myself early on that really helped me sort of figure out how did I want to homeschool our kids because that's kind of a big, you know, if you're just getting into the homeschool world you realize there's a bazillion different ways to do it, which is wonderful because we have so many options.

00:14:54.860 Um, but how do we know what that is well it's going to it's going to start by trial and error but I think even before that it's important to ask ourselves this question that I asked myself.

00:15:05.860 If no one were here to tell you how to homeschool and fear was not an issue you could kick that to the curb.

00:15:14.860 What would you want to do. What would you picture yourself doing with your kids that's going to tell you a lot about the direction that you want to go so when I took that question and thought it through.

00:15:26.860 I wanted to spend time with my kids. I wanted us to be enjoying doing things together. Um, I didn't want things to be rigid.

00:15:35.860 I wanted to have a but I wanted a good solid daily routine because I know that's part of what anchors kids and it anchors me human beings we need order.

00:15:45.860 And so, um, so that helped me a lot. And so every now and then I would ask myself that question just to make sure that I wasn't losing touch with and connection with what I felt like God had really laid on my heart to do with my kids because it matters what kind of mom you are it matters what kind of dad you are it matters what kind of parent you are.

00:16:07.100 Um, I am not a sit down and do big textbook kind of mom or teacher or homeschooling mom and I learned that really quickly right off the bat when we tried to tackle a couple textbooks it was like okay this is not working for us.

00:16:21.100 Be ready and willing to pivot. Um, don't do it too quickly because we can easily throw the baby out with the bath water sometimes a curriculum parts of it will you work for us they're actually working for us but other parts are not.

00:16:32.980 So, um, that's another little piece of advice and having that, um, big picture perspective will help you sort of stay clarified on those particular things.

00:16:45.300 I agree. Um, I noticed when I started homeschooling kindergarten with my first child, um, I was so centered on curriculum, and I was determined she was going to be the smartest kid ever and she actually is pretty smart but.

00:17:01.120 But, but by the time they got to grade five or six grade seven, um, I, I switched and I realized character was so much more important in curriculum, as long as they were reading and progressing and moving forward, whether they were reading at six, seven or eight, some kids are nine.

00:17:20.600 And that didn't matter so much to me anymore, as long as they were moving forward and character development was such a big part.

00:17:28.600 And I love your whole big picture thing about, um, your mission and does this fulfill, does this meet what we want to do as a family versus, um, you know, everybody's scattered doing their thing.

00:17:40.880 Yes, absolutely. And that's what, you know, I think building a strong family life is really key. Um, one of the phrases that I heard early on that was super helpful when I started to feel overwhelmed, I would ask myself is school revolving around home or is home revolving around school.

00:17:57.740 And it should be that school is revolving around home life. So you're adapting and adjusting how you're schooling your kids, according to your family culture, you know, um, there's so many things that go into that, but you're right.

00:18:11.560 Uh, the plotting is, is, is really where it's at with homeschooling. We're, as long as we're stepping forward, we're moving forward, we're not going to worry so much about these big leaps and that our kid is another Einstein or whatever, uh, which by the way, in case you don't know this about Einstein, this is hilarious.

00:18:28.800 My daughter started to read a biography on him and he, uh, there were some things that he really stunk at in school. And so his, he would have like one teacher, I think it was the language arts teacher was like,

00:18:41.560 he's stupid. He's not smart. He's not intelligent. You know, he just basically, he was a loser. And his math teacher was like, he's brilliant. He's absolutely brilliant. And it's because that was his gift, you know? 1.00

00:18:55.560 And so we have this thing of, uh, thinking we have to teach our kids in such a way that, you know, like we're going to prepare them to be professors in every subject. Nobody is good in every subject. So I think it's important. We, you know, strengthen those weak areas, but we don't make them the focus.

00:19:11.560 And so I love what you said about slowly, uh, going into schoolwork, you know, not being in such a hurry to get them to read just because they're five doesn't mean they're ready to read.

00:19:24.540 We have to look for signs that they're ready to read. And I talk about this in the unhurried homeschooler and it's just, your kid will tell you they'll have things that they sometimes they'll just flat out tell you, you know, that they're, they're ready to read.

00:19:38.880 I want to learn how to read, or they start trying to read certain things along the way, stop signs and, you know, signs on the road and, and, you know, okay, well, they're showing some interest and then we can try to, we can, you know, check and see if maybe that's something they want to start doing.

00:19:53.360 And we, we kind of keep, you know, maybe we'll do lessons daily. And I remember this happened with our first, I wasn't going to be in a hurry. I wasn't going to push her.

00:20:02.860 And, um, we were going through these reading lessons. She'd shown that she was ready to read. She was doing great. And then all of a sudden she had a horrible day and she just wasn't not, it wasn't registering.

00:20:14.220 She wasn't remembering anything from the day before. And I started to panic and I started to push her and I looked down at her as I was doing this.

00:20:22.200 And she looked up at me and she had tears and these big brown eyes. And I just thought, what am I doing? I need to just stop. And so I looked at her and I said, we're done. Don't even worry about this. You go play for a while.

00:20:34.380 And then each day after that, I would ask her, Hey, would you like to, you know, do your reading lessons? Nope. And I don't know how long we did that. But finally, when she was open and ready, we started again. And you know what? She picked up right where she left off. We didn't lose any footing at all in that. And this is the thing we have to understand with homeschooling, with learning in general, there's an ebb and a flow to it.

00:20:56.600 You're going to have time where you're just kind of really going at a good clip and then things kind of slow down for a while. And that's just totally, totally normal. And so those of you who have children who are just entering school age, I love what Doris said about emphasizing character. This is the time when we are establishing the foundation for character in our kids. So we're going to bring them alongside of us to help unload the dishwasher.

00:21:22.820 We're going to shoulder them with some, some light, some chores that are age appropriate for them. And we're working on their attitudes. We're working on their willingness to help out following directions, all these different things that don't need to be taught in a curriculum. They're, they're not going to be as effective because they're not going to be as meaningful. They're meaningful when we're living life alongside of our kids. And so I really encourage you to spend a lot of time just doing that and reading to them and just spending time with them, getting to know them.

00:21:53.820 I'm really glad you brought up the chores. I'm really glad you brought up the chores thing because what, one of the things that I learned at a homeschool convention, probably in the late nineties was as each child matures, you increase their new responsibilities and let the next child take on the easier ones. And that was so helpful and, and free up the mom to manage a crisis.

00:22:22.660 So if the youngest falls and really scrapes their knee and they're screaming, you have the time to love on that youngest. And the other two are taking up the slack to get right on the table or whatever.

00:22:38.040 Exactly. Exactly. Yes. I have several episodes on my podcast on chores, on a work ethic. I have a couple of episodes on work ethic. I think this is really, really important for us to be instilling in our kids. And I've, I see the fruit.

00:22:52.940 But of that now, all these years down the road, my kids are hard workers. They've never had a problem getting a job, keeping a job and, and getting promoted very, very quickly. And a lot of it has to, goes back to their work ethic.

00:23:08.940 Um, so yeah, I mean, we need to be a team, like, you know, moms sometimes will say to me, I'm just so worn out. I'm trying to keep up the house and the yard and the homeschooling. I'm like, what are your kids doing?

00:23:19.180 Like we need to, and I would tell my kids, you know, like we're a team. I can't do this without you, you know, and this gives them a sense of value, a sense of worth of, of meaning of, you know, just, I'm not just doing this to do this.

00:23:31.540 I'm doing this because my family needs me and we all need to work together. And these are things that are so, so important to teach our kids.

00:23:40.120 Yeah. Um, I'm just going to move into it. Um, another part of your book, you, and I know you've touched on this. I don't know if you want to add to it. You advocate that families slow down and resist the urge to overschedule.

00:23:53.300 Why is slowing down important in parenting and why is it important in homeschooling?

00:23:59.380 Okay. Well, it's important in parenting because again, we want to have the time to be an intentional parent. All these things that we just talked about, things we want to teach our kids, things that are very important to teach our kids have nothing to do with curriculum.

00:24:13.120 They take time. And if we don't have margin in our days in order to do those things, well, um, we're not going to do them. Well, we need to leave margin for the training and the discipline. Um, just to give an example, you know, you, you have, I had my daily routine set up.

00:24:31.300 So we were in blocks of time and the first block was a block of chores and then we ate breakfast and then there was a second block of chores and, and then I inspected their work.

00:24:42.340 So I took the time to go and look at how did they do. And, and I would give them praise and maybe a little critique and more praise, but what we're doing is we're, we're telling our kids that the work they do matters and how they do it matters.

00:24:57.240 But we can't do that if we don't pad in that time, I would also pad in a little extra time for when, cause there you can plan on it. There's going to be an uncooperative child. So you have to have a plan and you have to have the time to deal with that child well. And, um, you can't do that if you're in a hurry. So we want to be focusing on character building, nurturing sibling relationships.

00:25:20.000 This is another series that I have on my podcast, um, on nurturing sibling relationships. Um, we also want to have time to connect with our kids relationally. We, you know, we're teaching them, we're homeschooling with them, but we also need to just have a relationship with them in this. A lot of this happens through conversation. Um, my kids had self-directed time in the afternoon, every single day for a couple of hours. They were typically outside unless the weather was super, super bad. Um, they were outside.

00:25:49.400 They were doing stuff. They were, uh, building things. They were playing, they were doing all kinds of things, but when they would come in the house, maybe to get snack or go to the bathroom or whatever, I would always say, Hey, what's going on? You know, what are you guys doing out there? And they'd tell me, and I'd ask lots and lots and lots of questions about what they were doing. And then they'd go back out there. And, um, and this is so important because this establishes, um, something in them that says mom and dad care about what I'm doing.

00:26:17.720 They care about like what I'm doing actually has value. And I'll, I would go out and look at what they were doing. If they wanted me to, we talk about things at the dinner table. And the thing is, what you're doing is you're laying an important foundation for the future relationships as they become teens. And as they become adults, you want to have laid a good foundation, um, with them while they're little.

00:26:40.780 And so now my adult kids, inevitably, they will walk in the door and the immediately, the first thing they start doing is telling me everything that's going on with them, what they've been doing, what they've been accomplishing, whatever problems they've been having. They just, they just come and talk to me. And this is what we want. Um, when we have adult kids is we want to be part of their lives. We want them to come to us for any time.

00:27:06.220 They feel like they need counsel or encouragement, but that starts at the very beginning, leaving margin for that relationship. And the last thing is when it comes to parenting is it's time. There's time to be a student of our kids.

00:27:20.580 It's so important to watch your kids, to know them, to see how they react in certain situations and make mental notes, or sometimes even physical notes. I had a lot of kids. So sometimes I would take physical notes of what I was noticing in them as they interacted with other people. Um, and so that would help me know better how to homeschool them and how to parent them.

00:27:41.640 Um, and then, um, I advocate slowing down and resisting the urge to overschedule and homeschooling because again, we want to be intentional. We can't be intentional if we're in a hurry all the time. Now I'm not saying we're never in a hurry. I'm not saying, um, that we're never busy, but busy isn't the same as productive and busy isn't the same as being intentional. Um, I think I want to just make it really, really clear that education is not neutral.

00:28:09.640 I think that's something that we have really seen over the last few years. We've seen, uh, school boards, um, not caring what parents think. Um, they have their own agenda in terms of how they want to educate, um, your child, but essentially it's discipleship. Education is discipleship and discipleship is rooted in relationships and relationships take time.

00:28:34.640 And again, and again, that's why we don't want to overschedule our homeschooling. Um, a few more good reasons to not overschedule is that slowing down helps our kids become lifelong learners because it allows time for them to be kids. Um, one of the most beneficial gifts of childhood is time to play. And I really want to, I want to read you a quote from the United Nations.

00:28:59.640 It says play is sufficiently important to the United Nations that it has recognized it as a specific right for all children. Children need the freedom to explore and play play also contributes to brain development.

00:29:12.740 Evidence from neuroscience shows that the early years of a child's development set the basis for learning behavior and health throughout life.

00:29:22.560 The child's neural pathways are influenced in their development through the exploration, thinking problem solving and language expression, which occur during play play nourishes every aspect of a child of children's development. It forms the foundation of intellectual, social, physical, and emotional skills necessary for success in school and in life.

00:29:47.320 So essentially play paves the way for learning. And this is important also for our older kids. Don't think it's just for little ones. My high schoolers, and this is why my high schoolers never did more than about four hours of school a day. Um, my kindergartners way, way, way, way less than that incrementally less, the younger they are, but the high schoolers, we put a limit on it because I wanted them to have time to follow their interests, to job shadow, to, to understand that there's balance in life.

00:30:17.320 They needed to have other things besides just schoolwork and work all the time. And we need to, we need that as human beings. Um, another reason slowing down is good is that unhurried learning gives us time to help our kids engage in work, play, and learning that is actually meaningful to them.

00:30:37.060 So how many things will we as adults keep doing that we see as meaningless? And yet we expect our children to continue to do what they see as meaningless work when it comes to homeschooling. So as parents, it's, I think it's our job to, to help bring meaning to homeschooling.

00:30:56.160 That might mean that we approach homeschooling a different way in a certain subject, or it might mean that we need to explain why what they're doing is meaningful. But I think it's important for us to, um, to keep as many things meaningful as possible.

00:31:11.520 So unhurried learning also allows our children and us to hone in on their specific gifts and talents and uniquenesses. And this happens through experiences, hobbies, creativity, time to be bored.

00:31:24.560 So, you know, I think it's important that our kids actually do have some, some boredom when kids are bored. Eventually they have to reach down in the depths of their being and come up with something to be creative. And we need to be careful that we're not over resourcing our kids. We have a lot that's accessible to us in our culture and in our particular time in history.

00:31:45.240 And so I think the, the, the, the benefit that we can give our kids in simplifying, um, maybe what their resources are in order for them to be creative, I think is an important thing to pay attention to.

00:32:00.800 I love what you said about the time to be bored. There's numerous times my kids would sit around the counter while I'm in the kitchen, mixing something up.

00:32:11.100 Oh, mom, I'm bored. And I'd say, Oh, here, help me with this. Yes. Well, most of the time they go, Oh, I found something to do now, mom.

00:32:21.260 Their creativity kicked in pretty fast. It does. It does. And that's, you know, my mom in the summertime, I went to public school, but in the summertime, you know, I would, you know, do the regular thing that kids do. I'm bored, you know, or whatever.

00:32:32.680 My mom would have a jar and it would have little pieces of paper with either chores on it or fun things to do, but you took your, they took their chances.

00:32:41.900 You know, like if I took my chances, if I pulled something out of that jar, I was taking the risk that it could be a chore. So I did the same thing with my kids.

00:32:49.260 And it's hilarious because even as adults, they, well, for one thing, they're never bored. They're always busy all the time. Just very productive people. They know how to relax, but they're also really productive, but they won't even use the word bored around me as an adult. And I'm like, guys, it's okay. Now you don't, you don't have to worry. I'm not going to give you a chore or so. Yeah. Yeah.

00:33:10.940 I love that. This is really good stuff. Thank you. So you use the phrase thinking outside of the box in terms of homeschooling. Why is this important and how can a parent practice that?

00:33:24.060 Well, I think most of us have attended the traditional school system. And so this is all we have to go off of. And so we often try to copy that system. We take that system and we try to implement it at home.

00:33:38.340 And you can ask any teacher who used to teach in the classroom. And I know many, and who now homeschool their kids, they're saying it doesn't work because it's not, it's, it's not a good fit.

00:33:50.780 I think, I don't think it's a good fit for kids overall, but then when you try to implement it at home, it's even worse. And so that's the temptation that we all have though, because it's all we know, right?

00:34:01.460 It's, it's, it's our only experience. But also because of that, we have mistakenly shrunk our view of what education really is. And, you know, I don't think that learning happens really apart from real life.

00:34:16.200 And so as we live real life with our kids, there is learning happening all the time. So when you're in the morning and you're going through chores and you're teaching and you're training and you're showing them how to do a better job, complimenting, building confidence in them that they did a good job, teaching them, they're learning time management, they're learning communication and teamwork and following directions.

00:34:39.260 That is all part of their education. And I talk about this in the four hour school day. I really kind of break that open and, and help parents see, look, there's a much bigger view of what education is education. We're, we're educating the whole child. So it's not just about the book work. It's not just about the curriculum. It's about so much more than that.

00:35:02.960 Um, and I think it's also important to understand that the, the history of the current traditional school system, which it sounds like Israel talked about in, um, the, the, uh, uh, event that he did with you, but just briefly, if you didn't hear that, um, I'm just going to give you just a really brief, um, picture.

00:35:24.460 The current traditional system that we are still educating our kids with was really basically started back during the industrial revolution. Okay. So there was a lot going on. There was a lot of advancements made in efficiency and, um, mechanizing things so that there was better production, more efficient production. And that was great.

00:35:46.700 That has done wonderful things for us as a civilization and a culture and all of that. However, what ended up happening is we applied that same thinking to education.

00:35:58.280 And so now we're, we've mechanized education. We've stopped remembering that we are educating a whole child and we've started, uh, we've moved away from purpose and they moved towards the measuring stick being performance.

00:36:14.760 And so I feel like we need to go back the other direction instead of performance being the measuring stick. And it's not that our kids never shouldn't try to do well. Um, we should shoot for excellence in everything we do, but we do that with purpose, not just to perform. Okay. So we need to run from the, this herd mentality and toward the truth that each child is a unique individual designed by their creator with purpose.

00:36:43.000 So as parents, it's our job to highlight and hone in on those strengths and stop thinking in terms of a remedial approach. And what that is, is basically really focusing on what they're not good at and trying to get them better at it. Now there's a time and a place for some of that, but I think that's become the rule instead of the exception, um, because it's a perfect example of performance over purpose. So no child can be good at everything. I'm not good at everything.

00:37:12.140 Um, my daughter said this, I mentioned this earlier. She said, it's like, we're educating as though every child will be a professor in that subject. That's simply not going to happen. So let's be realistic. Let's be kind. Let's be gracious. And let's acknowledge that our kids are uniquely who they are.

00:37:31.140 And instead of trying to, um, and instead of trying to, uh, homeschool a child, you don't actually have, or make them into the child that you want them to be homeschool, the kid you have, right? Look for those strengths, hone in on those strengths, develop those strengths, encourage them. And when you shift your mindset, um, to having a purpose that gives meaning to much more meaning to whatever you're doing.

00:37:58.760 And so I think it's really important for us to, um, again, uh, think about homeschooling in terms of purpose and, and, you know, go back to what we said at the very beginning, having that big picture in mind and saying like, what do I really want for my kids? Well, I want my kids to be hard workers. I want them to be lifelong learners. I want them to be resourceful.

00:38:16.760 I want them to have a relationship with God. Um, I want them to be kind. I want them to love others. And so that starts at home by loving their siblings. So, you know, that's part of their education as well. Um, like I mentioned before.

00:38:31.120 Yeah, I love the point about, um, the individualness of the children. Um, I'm so glad I learned that from, again, from a homeschool conference that I went to probably late nineties, early two thousands. And we, as a culture don't expect greatness from our kids. And, um, so we let them sit in their mom's basement until they're 30 and then, or, or who knows why or what.

00:39:00.940 Right. Sometimes it has to be, but lots of times it doesn't. And then maybe at 37, 47, they get successful and we consider that greatness. And what I learned was they can be great at 17.

00:39:14.560 And yeah. And as a parent, when you believe in your child to be unique and special and gifted in what they have and may not be academia, maybe something, maybe they're the firecracker in the family that, that has a way of just,

00:39:30.940 drawing people to them and, um, um, they just sort of shine and stand out in their own way. Or maybe they're just really good at something and the opportunities around them.

00:39:42.340 They're simple little opportunities, but they're experiencing some greatness at 16, 15, 14, whatever the age, cutting lawns and running a business at 15 and, and, and edifying them that this is wonderful.

00:39:56.500 The sense of greatness. I think that's really important. It does so much good for their self-esteem and the belief that they can, whatever it is that they want to see and do in their life.

00:40:07.400 That it's a can do. Yeah. Yes, it is. And it's a, it's a belief that they have value to bring to the table.

00:40:16.840 And so whatever, wherever they are, whatever they're engaged in, it's meaningful to them because they believe that they have value to bring to that situation.

00:40:27.020 And so this is, this is the kind of, these are the kinds of kids we want to raise you guys. This is going to change our culture. And one of the reasons that I am so excited that so many parents are deciding to homeschool.

00:40:39.400 And I know it's terrifying, especially if you never, ever imagined that you would be here. But I am telling you, this is the future of our society. This is the future of our countries.

00:40:51.420 And that is these children. These children that we are raising can have such an incredible impact, especially as I see more and more families doing this, but it's going to require us to overcome our fear or ignore our fear and decide we are going to do this.

00:41:10.300 We're going to do this because I'm not just investing in my children. I'm investing in my grandchildren and my great grandchildren and my great, great grandchildren. A lot of times we don't think past the current generation, but I'm telling you, I'm there. I have 10 grandkids and I'm watching my children be married and, and have children and raise children and influence the people around them.

00:41:34.400 And so I've got eight and you multiply that just that one that in this, what, 20, 30 years, the impact that they, they are beginning to have are already have had on the culture parents. This is, this is what's going to make the difference.

00:41:50.460 You know, we look around and we see the politics and we see we're so discouraged, but I'm telling you, this is the answer. This is the answer. We homeschool, we raise these kids and they're going to go out and they're going to change things.

00:42:03.780 So this is a worthwhile investment, but it's going to require you to, I would say like, I've got to put my big girl pants on, you know, I'm going to do this, be determined, be determined that nothing is going to deter you from doing this.

00:42:18.440 I know there's some people in our audience that are single, single parents, or they have one child.

00:42:28.420 And I guess the whole part of how do you, if they don't have the sibling interaction, how do you fill that in their life? And I guess the other thing is as single parents and I became a single parent.

00:42:41.840 I was a widow when my girls were teenagers and I did finish homeschooling right through to grade 12. So it can be done.

00:42:51.280 Have you got anything encouraging? You can just speak to them about how to do that.

00:42:56.120 Well, you know, I think about this one mom who came up to me after a conference and I don't even remember why she pulled me aside.

00:43:03.840 I think she'd been encouraged by some of the things that I had talked about, but she was a single mom and she looked at me and she said, nothing is more important than my kids.

00:43:14.940 And she said, I am going to do this. I don't care what it takes. I'm going to do this. And just that alone right now, right there, that determination, there is a way for you to do this.

00:43:27.940 Parents all over the world, single parents are doing this. I do have a couple of podcasts that I did with a mom who is a single mom of four kids and she had some wonderful things to share.

00:43:39.600 So I would really just direct you there because I don't feel like I can fully speak to that because that's not my experience.

00:43:46.140 But I'm telling you, as you do this and as you overcome, you're going to be that person to somebody else who's in the same situation.

00:43:54.580 So again, this isn't just even for you and your children. It's going to impact the culture and impact other single homeschooling families.

00:44:03.240 So I would say find your community. I think this is something that Action for Canada has been very, very clear and clear message and getting across is try to find your people, try to find a community.

00:44:16.980 You just need to know other people who are doing this with you.

00:44:22.340 Even if you don't have everything in common, you do have homeschooling in common and I think you should lean into that.

00:44:31.820 That's great. You cultivated independent learning in all eight of your kids from early on.

00:44:39.660 Why did you do that? And can you give some practical examples of what that looked like?

00:44:44.520 Okay. So I think the first consideration that I had to process was how many kids I had, right?

00:44:53.080 I had, I had eight kids in 13 years. At one point I had six kids, nine and under, and there were two girls.

00:45:02.300 There were nine and seven. And before the oldest boy turned six, I had the fourth boy.

00:45:09.260 So I had four boys, five and under when that fourth boy was born. So our homeschooling had to look different than a family who maybe has two or three kids.

00:45:20.820 I had to understand and embrace that our family was weaved together this way by God. And so there was a way to do this, but again, it was going to look different than maybe other people around me.

00:45:38.940 Okay. So that was the first thing, just accepting that, but also in that process, recognizing that I could not sit down for copious amounts of time with each of my children.

00:45:51.640 Also, I am really not wired that way. I'm really not. And so, um, I had to adjust. Not only was I not wired that way, but I couldn't with all the little ones.

00:46:03.240 So, um, I started out just immediately, as soon as they, you know, you have to sit with them when they're learning to read and write and do basic math.

00:46:12.980 Um, once they're able to do that on their own. So I did invest obviously at the very beginning to get them to that point. Um, then I started to encourage, um, ownership.

00:46:24.600 And so what I would do is I would, you know, like I, they had their little workbooks that they did every day and they had to do a certain amount of pages in, in the workbook.

00:46:34.420 They knew what it was. Um, so they, they knew that when it was time, they just sat down, they got their workbooks and they started working.

00:46:41.420 And I was available if they needed me, but in the beginning, when they're first learning to follow directions, you know, they're just learning to read and they're just learning to read the directions and they're still learning comprehension.

00:46:52.580 So I would have them read the directions to me. And then I would say, what do you think they're telling you to do?

00:46:58.920 So now they're having to process this, what they've read and then put it into action and also put it into words.

00:47:06.160 So they would tell me what they thought the directions were telling them. And if they were correct, I would say, that's absolutely spot on. Good job. Way to go. And they would get started.

00:47:14.880 Um, if they didn't have it correct, then we would, then we would have a conversation about maybe, uh, maybe have them read it again and try again. And then, you know, cause I'm really trying to just sort of, I'm, I'm nudging them towards ownership and independence.

00:47:30.500 And this is the thing I wanted my kids to own what they were doing. I wanted them to own every area of their life through a process. Like it's not something that's going to happen at five years old.

00:47:41.260 It's something that I'm encouraging little bits at a time, because as they're more invested, they're more motivated. And so, um, I think that knowing them, knowing what they needed to do each day, knowing what was expected of them, um, was, was a huge start in that.

00:48:01.340 And there's some things we did together, like reading out loud or whatever. Um, but I did try to always encourage them to own what they were doing and, uh, do as much as, uh, as they could on their own.

00:48:13.900 And, uh, it seems to have worked. I remember watching some of, I would watch their faces while they were doing their math or language arts or whatever.

00:48:21.840 And, uh, some language arts we did together, but the things they were doing in a workbook, I would watch their faces.

00:48:26.300 And if they were grimacing and looking pained, I would say, Hey, remember I'm right here. If you need any help, do you need some help?

00:48:34.120 Inevitably, especially the boys, they're so independent. I had five boys out of the eight kids and, uh, they would say, no, I'm going to figure this out on my own.

00:48:42.160 Well, fast forward, I have got these, these kids who are massive problem solvers, um, to this day, they're critical thinkers and problem solvers because they had this determination that they were going to do it themselves.

00:48:54.180 And so, um, I think that's something we should encourage.

00:48:58.780 I love that. I agree. And the one thing I learned is by the time, so when you start young, it's, it's, it's a lot easier. Like when you start right at kindergarten, right.

00:49:09.800 You don't have to undo any of the, you know, um, the way, the, the process, the system and all that.

00:49:17.180 Right. And so, and if you're pulling your child, you will see what I, what I'm going to say is eventually they become independent learners.

00:49:23.820 And so with that, the critical thinking and owning their schoolwork and by grade seven, I mean, if they, in their head, they were thinking like, wow, if I, if I get going, you know, first thing in the morning after chores.

00:49:36.920 Yep. You mean I, I have the afternoon free. Yes. Was it free? Sometimes it was free or it was structured, but the, the, the paperwork, the busy work, uh, was done.

00:49:48.560 Right. In the morning. So it, you, eventually they become independent learners and they say, well, how do you teach high school?

00:49:56.740 I don't think I did a lot of teaching so much anymore. It was more facilitating and, and they own their schoolwork in high school.

00:50:05.060 And so they just need the time. So if you're just pulling your child right now at, at, in junior high or high school, um, you're going to need a good year just to lean back and, uh, let them, um, sort of figure out how to become an independent learner without being so dependent on the teacher said, the teacher said, the teacher said, and it will come.

00:50:29.980 You just have to relax and it'll come. Yeah. You know, one of the things that I did with our high schoolers, uh, before they got into high school, I told them, you know, um, that you're going to earn this, this diploma. I'm, I'm not, I basically said, I'm not going to hold your hand and I'm not going to hound you.

00:50:44.960 You have to earn these credits. So we had agreed upon credits that they were, they were to earn and, and, you know, and then we talked about how that they would earn those. So like the first year, the freshman year, we would talk about, okay, so, um, you need to do, let's say algebra.

00:50:59.240 Okay. So, and I would bring them several different options in how that they could learn it. So they could do an online class. They could go to a class. I, um, in high school, they had, they offered that and, uh, or they could do it through a DVD.

00:51:13.740 They could do it, uh, you know, streaming online, or they could do it through a textbook. So I would let them choose how they wanted to learn that particular, uh, subject.

00:51:25.060 And that was really helpful because it just the fact that they were making those decisions, help them own what they were doing. And so, and, and this is really an important, this is an important transition that, that needs to happen, um, in high school.

00:51:38.800 It's, it's really, really helpful. Um, you know, as they're, you know, especially when they get out of high school and then they're launching, you know, into whatever's next, um, that ownership is really important.

00:51:48.560 Yeah. And one of the questions in the chat is, um, how do they, uh, if you can't teach physics or algebra, how do you find resources?

00:52:00.840 And so you touched on a few of those. Yeah. I would also add even hire a tutor or somebody from your community, your family, your church, retired teacher.

00:52:10.800 Yeah. There are wonderful resources out there. I actually have a podcast on one of my favorite resources. It's called, um, uh, the one-on-one series and it takes you through, uh, general science, biology, physics, and chemistry.

00:52:27.040 And he does an amazing job of keeping, uh, the students engaged, not overloading them, leaving enough room for questions and wonder and things like that. So it's, it's a very, very good high school resource for those things.

00:52:42.080 Thank you for bringing up your podcast. Um, if you have time folks, uh, listening in here, go to her website and, uh, look at her resources. She's got a tremendous amount of podcasts there, um, to, to help you.

00:52:56.420 Yeah. I just want to mention when you go to that page, that podcast page on my website, there's a search bar at the top. You can put in any key word and episodes will come up. So if you put in high school, high school episodes are going to come up. Um, that gets you straight to the right to the episodes that you actually really need to hear because I've got over 450 episodes on there.

00:53:18.640 Wow. That's awesome. Um, one of the other things that came up in the chat was entering university college, all of those things. So, um, they're very similar as the United States because my sister raised her kids in North Dakota and homeschooled them.

00:53:35.040 Um, and, uh, so, um, but be encouraged because a lot of universities and colleges want homeschoolers. Yes. They're actually, they have sectors specifically a percentage that they want the homeschooled kids.

00:53:49.880 So you need to phone the school, ask them what the requirements are in Canada. Start asking those questions around grade 10, grade nine, grade 10. So you know how to steal, steer the education and also talk to your provincial homeschool association to what is required in the province.

00:54:07.340 Right. Yeah. Can I just add a little something to that? Um, I'm just going to throw in my own personal perspective on college. I think it's becoming irrelevant in many, many ways. Um, we've always been told that's the only path to success is absolutely not the case. And I can attest to that.

00:54:27.240 I have one that graduated from college, but all of them have been very, very successful. And again, it went back to the lifelong learning, being resourceful, good work ethic. Um, you're so right, Doris. They are looking, colleges are looking for homeschoolers because they're motivated. Right. And they know how to learn and they're, and they're there with purpose and meaning. Right. Um, but also businesses, employers, they're, they are starting to say, I don't care if you have a degree.

00:54:55.740 They might say that it's a requirement, but a lot of them are foregoing the degree and saying, if, if you're, if you're willing to work hard and you have, you know, they can't teach you. You can't teach your child to show up on time. They can't teach your child to work hard, but they can teach them the skills often that their business, um, requires. Um, we have a son who, um, at 18 years old, we called a local plumbing company because he wanted to be a plumber.

00:55:23.220 And we said, Hey, would you be willing to take on a young man? Um, and basically as an apprentice. And he said, if he knows how to work, I'll take him. Well, fast forward four years later, our son is now the head of that crew and he's working towards getting his, um, plumber's license. So, and he did that in a matter of a few years and he's been paid in the meantime.

00:55:43.460 So the whole time he's getting his training, he's also getting paid. So, um, there are lots of other options out there. So don't, don't, uh, uh, hyper-focus on college, be open to some other alternatives.

00:55:56.680 I'm actually, uh, doing a series right now on the podcast. They're coming out every three or four weeks of, uh, college alternatives. And I'm, um, bringing some, some wonderful new resources that are coming out for, for, uh, for kids who are, uh, graduating and, um, heading into those years.

00:56:15.520 Oh, that's exciting. We're looking forward to that. Um, what would you say to the parent who feels unqualified to help school their child?

00:56:24.180 Well, I always think that it's fair to question a system that, uh, we were educated in that supposedly doesn't qualify us to teach our own children.

00:56:35.280 Uh, that's my first thing. Okay. So, uh, because if I, if I say, oh, I'm not qualified and I stick them in school, I'm, I'm putting them in the same position that I was in to not be qualified to teach my children.

00:56:47.300 I, I honestly, here's, here's one thing that I heard from somebody that I thought was just absolutely brilliant. He said, it is a known and accepted fact that if you've done something for sick, for, uh, 10,000 hours or more, you are considered an expert in that particular thing.

00:57:06.300 Okay. So by the time your child is six years old, you have spent 16,000 hours with them. So by the time their school age, five years old, what would that be? Maybe 13,000. So you, you are more than an expert in your child.

00:57:23.000 You know, at the end of the day, you love your kids more than anyone. You care about their future more than anyone. You're more invested in their lives than anyone else. Why wouldn't you be the best person to facilitate their education? And I love that Doris used that term because as homeschoolers, we don't teach our kids every single thing.

00:57:44.980 Um, we have options. I look, I look at the options that are available to us as homeschoolers. If there was ever a time in history that we could homeschool our kids, it's now the problem is simplifying and deciding which resources to use, but, but we're not going to teach our kids every single subject. That's just, that's not going to happen. Um, no teacher in school could teach your child every subject.

00:58:11.760 They typically have their sort of their specialties, especially once they get out of, you know, into high school age and all of that. But in, in, uh, elementary school, um, I, I feel like most of us are qualified to teach K through eight.

00:58:30.080 And, and then at high school, we can outsource some things, but we can outsource some things earlier if we want to, it's completely up to us, but here's the bottom line, you know, and love your kids more than anyone.

00:58:41.000 So you are the best person to choose what you believe is best for your child. And I think that's the most important thing that you need to know. Parents have been dismissed. They have been ignored, um, especially in specifically in the school system. And that is just absolutely polar opposite of what is right and true and good.

00:59:06.760 God gave you. God gave you these kids. They are yours. They are your responsibility. They're also your privilege to raise, to educate and to provide for. And so, um, parents, you absolutely can do this. It will be a learning curve for you and for them.

00:59:25.260 But I'm, as long as we are willing to learn right alongside of our kids, we take an attitude of humility. We don't believe we know everything, but we do believe that we're the best person to facilitate our kids education. And then we're willing to learn alongside of them. We can totally do this.

00:59:43.360 We totally can. And I always tell people, did you graduate? Yes. You know, ACE says, ah, and right. Yeah. And then also like, if you've taught them to talk and, and brush their teeth and train and pick up their clothes in the room and get dressed.

01:00:05.480 The next extension is just reading to them and sounding out letters. Absolutely. It's not hard. It's an extension of parenting. Really? It's really what it is. It's an extension of parenting. It's just that we haven't grown up in a culture that thinks like that.

01:00:21.640 But I mean, having our kids at home, when they're in a, in a safe, loving home environment, they learn so much quicker and with so much more efficiently. And I talk about this in the four hour school day, because their environment is one that's one of nurturing. It's of calm. It's of peace, you know?

01:00:44.040 And if we just nurture that kind of environment for our kids, they are going to learn because kids are curious by nature. Learning is instinctive for them. And so our job is just to, to make it as pop, you know, just as have an environment that is as conducive to that learning as possible.

01:01:03.620 Um, what are your thoughts in finding a supportive, engaging community to start the homeschool adventure? So parents have all the support they need.

01:01:15.540 Well, I know that you were saying you have, um, uh, like we have state organizations, you have province organizations. A lot of times that is a good place to start and you'll, you'll, you'll end up finding a lot of them have listed co-ops and different things.

01:01:33.620 In different areas of that province or that state. And so you can find that city or that area that you live in and, and, and find different options there. Um, I, you know, not every co-op or homeschool community is a good fit. So I think, um, in the four hour school day, I actually have a whole chapter on questions to ask yourself sort of things to consider when choosing a homeschool community. But I think it is important that we have one. Um, it does not have to be perfect. Um, maybe you

01:02:03.600 We live in a more remote area and there isn't anything start your own. It doesn't have to be anything fancy. You don't have to offer classes. Um, it can be as simple as, Hey, um, you know, these two families are going to come over and we're going to do some baking today, or we're just going to, we're going to go to the park or we're going to go to the river or, um, you know, we're going to, I don't know.

01:02:24.660 The possibilities are limitless of things that we can do. Like I have things that I enjoy. I like baking and I enjoy learning about herbs. So, so that's something I could offer. And then maybe another, another mom has something else she's good at and would love to do with the kids. Again, it doesn't have to be fancy or complicated. It's just, it's, it's really about community. It's really about having, um, people that are doing what you're doing.

01:02:51.660 Even if you're not all doing it the same way, um, to be able to lean into and to, you know, have them support and pray for each other. Um, I think that's, we were made, we were made for community.

01:03:02.720 Yeah, I agree. And in, in, in these communities, um, so up here, the word, um, co-op can be used interchangeably with a pod or a learning center. Um, when, so I'm, I'll just choose learning center. Um, my sister-in-law had those on Friday. So the moms would take turns teaching different things, but, and that was Fridays. And then a lot of socialization happened there for the kids.

01:03:30.380 That's where they met really great kids. And as a parent, you could reinforce positive socialization versus the negative socialization that they're exposed to when they're in the school system away from you for six hours a day.

01:03:45.940 And you don't know what they've heard and not heard. So, um, so in that regard for the kids, it's those little centers or groups are really important, but it's also really great for the parent, for the moms, especially.

01:04:00.000 Cause I mean, how many times have you been as a parent, um, at a sports event, your child's playing soccer or at swimming lessons and you're watching your child play and you're talking with the other parents and you're, you're making new friends.

01:04:13.180 And so it can happen through sports, um, community leagues. It can happen at these pods and co-ops. Um, so, and then there's the structured stuff online. Um, when I had to homeschool my granddaughter this past spring, I found a homeschool group locally here on Facebook and they had to craft an art thing on Fridays.

01:04:38.260 And so we went to that and a nature hike on whatever day. And we did that. Um, and then there too, you meet more moms, you meet our other parents and there are some dads, it's mostly moms. Um, but they're all looking to have that community as well. Right. Parents are, and the children are. And these friends that my kids had when they grew up, they're lifetime friends still.

01:05:04.020 Yep. We have the same thing. And I think, um, I do want to speak to the online aspect. I think online things can be helpful, but they are only supplemental. I mean, I have a podcast and I tell people, listen, it is more important for you to meet people in real life, to find mentors in real life. Um, I can be helpful. I can be supplemental, but these real life relationships are absolutely crucial.

01:05:33.580 Because they keep us from feeling isolated because that can happen somewhat quickly, especially if you don't know, you don't have a lot of family or close friends that have chosen to homeschool. Um, you can quickly feel isolated. That can get discouraging, uh, really fast.

01:05:51.360 So, um, these real life relationships nurture those. And, um, yes, I hear you that these moms, even these moms that of these kids that my kids are still friends with, I'm still friends with the moms. So, uh, yeah, it's really bonding. It's very bonding and, and it can be, it's just a wonderful, wonderful thing for everybody.

01:06:11.020 Yeah. Um, you and I talked just prior about, um, curriculum and, uh, I know that's right now going into the fall. That's right. Center for most parents. Can you just create some balance for our audience and put some of that into perspective?

01:06:29.460 Absolutely. So if your kids are younger, I would encourage you to teach through doing just living life alongside of each other, go to the library, go to the store together. We're teaching our kids. Uh, we're so much when we do those things, we're teaching, they watch us interact with people. So they're learning. How do we talk to a cashier? They can help us put things in the carts. They can, uh, count things. We, we, there's so much.

01:06:55.440 Our kids can learn just in a trip to the grocery store when they're little like that. And so try to make most, if not all of their learning life things you're actually doing. Okay. And don't get hung up on curriculum at that point in the game. Some things can be helpful, honestly. And for kindergarten, I either did nothing at all and they just played a ton, or if they were interested in doing some things,

01:07:21.040 I just got some little workbooks from, uh, horizons or from Walmart or from Costco, they're all essentially learning the same thing at that point in the game, you know? So it's not important that we have super expensive curriculum or whatever.

01:07:37.500 There's some really great options out there for, uh, like Charlotte Mason. If you want to do more of a literate, you want to start a more literature based type of homeschooling. There's some really good things for those younger years. Um, homegrown, I think it's homegrown preschoolers or homegrown learners.

01:07:54.060 She's a really good, good resource for, for the younger years. But, um, I, I have a podcast called, um, let's, let's talk about curriculum and where I address this in a, in a longer episode, but I would say, just remember that curriculum isn't everything. Curriculum is part of their education, but it is not all of their education. I have people ask me all the time, what curriculum did you use?

01:08:20.740 And what they're really asking is how can I have a checklist that will make sure that my kid is successful? It's not going to come out of the curriculum. It's going to come from here, moms and dads. It's going to come from right here. You nurturing and loving your children and, uh, training them and discipling them and disciplining them and guiding them and, and just being walking alongside of them.

01:08:44.460 And that is, that's going to be the bulk of who they become. And so what we allow in our homes, what we don't allow in our homes, these are all very important aspects. Um, also when it comes to curriculum, I mentioned this earlier, yet sometimes curriculum just isn't working or only parts of it are working. You can use just pieces and parts that are working for you and, or your child.

01:09:08.640 It has to work for you as well. Parents, not just for your child. It has to work for both of you. So, um, and, and granted, there are times we need to be challenged and we need to, you know, think outside of our comfort zone for the sake of our child. If something's working really, really well for them, it's kind of a pain for us. We're going to do it anyway, because it's working really well for them and they're learning a lot.

01:09:28.880 So, um, that's probably all I would have to say right now about curriculum.

01:09:34.820 Yeah. It's, it's a big world of curriculum. It could be overwhelming and, uh, you know, keep it simple as you start and no matter what grade you are, um, just keep it simple.

01:09:45.320 Absolutely. And then as you touch base with your, uh, provincial group, they will have more information on their websites and you can talk to them too about, uh, the different curriculums available and, and, um, the places to purchase it.

01:10:00.660 And, uh, there are some really great, uh, providers in Canada. Um, so your shipping will be a lot less, but there's also great stuff out of the U S as well.

01:10:10.700 Um, um, I wanted to just talk about your two books that I'm hoping you have right there. If you could just show us.

01:10:20.400 I do. I have three. Um, one is a, one's a devotional for homeschooling moms. It's called unhurried grace for a mom's heart.

01:10:28.940 And the other one is the unhurried homeschooler. This is a, uh, subtitle is a simple, mercifully short book on homeschooling.

01:10:37.780 You can literally read it in less than two hours. And, um, this has been such a big seller because it just hits the highlights and keeps people focused on the nuts and bolts of what's important in homeschooling

01:10:50.680 and the importance of slowing down. And I have moms reach out pretty much on the daily. They read this once a year, twice a year, four times a year.

01:10:59.700 It's the book they give to parents who are just starting homeschooling, who aren't sure they can do it, um, because it's not overwhelming. And so, um, that's a, that's a fun one.

01:11:09.760 And then the four hour school day, this is actually more in depth to what I, if you love the unhurried homeschooler, you'll love this as well. Same style of writing, lots of stories.

01:11:18.660 I feel like, um, stories are, they inspire us and, um, points and principles can be, um, conveyed really sweetly and winsomely through stories. And so there's a lot of stories and examples in here and just kind of gives parents that, that big step back. What is education really?

01:11:39.840 And all three books can be found on, uh, amazon.ca and, and the four hour school day only specific is a christianbook.com, which we as Canadians can access as well. So, um, tell us a little bit more about your mentoring course. You've got the podcast going on.

01:12:02.280 I have the podcast. Yeah. The podcast is the Dorinda Wilson podcast, and you can listen to it from any of your favorite platforms, or you can listen to it directly from my website, Dorinda Wilson.com. I also have a mentoring course, and this is called the unhurried homeschooler mentoring course. And what I do is I talk about in more detail, more specifics and resources, what it looks like to take a simple, more simple, unhurried approach to homeschooling kindergarten through 12th

01:12:32.180 So it's a series of great. So it's a series of videos that you have unlimited access to, um, that, you know, you and Canada can, can order from there as well and, uh, have access to those who go revisit them whenever you want to. And it's, I just, um, I encourage you to at least go and check it out. Uh, it's a, it's a great, especially if you're first starting out and you're not, this whole idea of, of slowing down is appealing to you, but not sure what that actually looks like in real life. Um, that,

01:13:01.960 that video series will help with that. Wow. You've had so many great things to add and, and to encourage us with, I'm hoping our audience is going to go feeling like they can do this. And, uh, that, um, it's so you just start, just start. And, uh, one day at a time there, there are times when there is a bit of a lull or a grind. Um, that's when the plotting happens.

01:13:29.900 And then you're at the end of the school year and you go, wow, we did it. We did it. You take a breather in the summer, get yourself out to a convention, a real life convention. Those are often happening either after Christmas or April and May, June in your province. Look those up on your provincial sites. So you can see where they're happening. Sometimes there's curriculum, use curriculum sale affairs and, uh, or just keynote speakers here and there.

01:13:59.000 Stay on your provincial sites. Keep looking to see where they are. You can check each other's out too, to see if you're going to be traveling. You can go to your neighboring province as well. They're not that far away. Um, and I also wanted to just reemphasize, you know, Dorenda, you and I were just talking about different methods on the Charlotte Mason approach.

01:14:19.000 When I got my eyes on that book and it totally settled me down in the primary years. I realized I can teach them how to read and comprehension, all that with just relaxing. And, uh, so that's an approach and a method.

01:14:37.800 If you folks don't understand what any of these terms are, I saw the word schooling and unschooling earlier in the chat, go back to that website. I had mentioned the Canadian homeschooler.com. The author, um, Lisa Marie Fletcher has a book, how to homeschool in Canada.

01:14:56.340 And on her website, she actually breaks it down all the different learning styles. Now I was eclectic. I did a little bit of everything. Cause I had three different kids.

01:15:08.040 Yeah. I'm sure you had, I did. I did too. Somebody said to me early on, she said, um, it was a fellow homeschooler. I was just getting to know her. And she said, so what kind of homeschooling style are you? I said, I don't know. I didn't actually even know there were homeschooling styles.

01:15:24.740 And so then once she got to know me, like several months later, she goes, I know what you are. I said, really do tell, because I don't even know. She said, you are a combination of Charlotte Mason and unschooling. I was like, oh, well, good to know.

01:15:40.460 And then I just kept doing what I felt like was right for our family, what God was leading me to do. And, uh, all these years later, I'm so glad that I, that I didn't let other people decide for me what was best for my kids. Um, not that we can't take advice or counsel or, you know, we get wisdom a lot of times from other people, but at the end of the day, this has to settle with our hearts.

01:16:06.440 This has to put us at peace in the way that we're doing things. And so, yeah, just, just keep that in mind.

01:16:14.160 Yeah. And then the learning styles of the children and then the parent. Absolutely. I am a bit of an ADD kind of mom. So I rolled with the punches, but I like the structure. Yes. But yet, if we're onto something, we're going to go there for an hour and really study it. Right. Yeah. I love that.

01:16:35.740 And yeah, there's that balance of like, you, you do have to fill, fulfill some of these things as you're learning outcomes. If you need to, if you're registered with the school, let's say you're in grade 11 and you need, you're working towards your diploma and you need to fulfill the paperwork. Um, that's life. And by then they should be able to do all that. Um, but yet, yeah, there's each kid learns differently.

01:17:02.220 They do. And I just want to share a real quick story in my middle child. I was, so my oldest was sitting beside me on the couch. I was reading her a story. I was nursing my, my third child and my, my, I think at that time she would have been about three and a half.

01:17:17.580 And she couldn't sit my middle child. She couldn't sit beside me yet. She was in a dress twirling and twirling and twirling. And one of the things I think I was challenged by a mom was ask her if, when you read the story, ask her to retell the story.

01:17:34.880 Mm-hmm. So she retold it. She retold it. She nailed it. Right. And I went, okay, she's listening. She just has to dance through this to be moving. Yeah. And that would never happen in a classroom. I had kids who love to read upside down. I don't understand that, but I don't have to, like it was working for them. Right. And so, you know, you're right. Like that narration. I love that. You just mentioned that. Cause if you're in the early years with your kids and you want to know, like, how are they, their comprehension, all you have to do is ask them to retell the story.

01:18:04.280 You just read to them or, and then ask them maybe some specific questions about what happened in this story. That right there is reading comprehension. And that just happened through conversation. It can happen with just so much sweetness and slowness. And it doesn't have to be, you know, this structured, busy work. It can just be very relational. And our kids, they love that. They thrive on that.

01:18:25.880 They do. And eventually they will sit there and a year later, she's sitting there listening to the story. So it's just each child matures and advances at different levels. We cannot compare with our, the people around us, the kids around us, because they too are at different levels.

01:18:44.340 Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. I would add to that though. Some people take that as though you're not disciplining your kids. And I speak to that on the podcast, because if you don't have boundaries for your kids, that is not a healthy learning environment for them. You know, we talk about creating a healthy learning environment. Part of that is boundaries. Our kids need to respect us and they need to know that we're in charge. And we spend the early years kind of establishing that.

01:19:11.040 And so I think it's important for parents to understand this is not a free-for-all, but there are boundaries, but then our children can be kids within those boundaries. And it's a perfect, safe, secure place for them. Kids love boundaries. They'll act like they don't, but they feel much more secure when there are boundaries. And I, like I said, I talk about this on the podcast about discipline, how important it is to our homeschooling in order for it to go well.

01:19:35.140 Right on.

01:19:37.140 Right on. We're going to wrap it up here. I'm looking at the clock. And so thank you so much for being here with us today. I will open it up to maybe one or two questions that are just heavy. I know in the chat, there was a lot of questions. I think we've covered a lot.

01:19:53.520 I know that they will find more answers on your website through your podcast or your books, through the websites I suggested. Also check out in Canada, HSLDA.ca. That's our Homeschool Legal Defense Association. It's loaded with great information and it'll help you with your provincial laws. So you know what you're doing and what you're legally allowed to do, which you're legally allowed to homeschool in Canada.

01:20:18.900 So we are going to close here because of time. And thank you so much everyone for signing in. This will be recorded or has been recorded and it'll be uploaded probably by the end of the week.

01:20:30.060 And if you have any questions, you can reach me at homeschooling at actionforcanada.ca. And I can help you further. And again, go to our website to find your province.

01:20:45.460 And link and hook up with the provincial association to help you get started to find your support team, ask questions about curriculum. These websites are loaded with videos as well, how to type videos.

01:21:03.380 They've got their own speakers posted here and their activity lists. And then, of course, the laws of your your province. So that's really important. And we will be back doing a webinar again on Tuesday, August, sorry, September 12.

01:21:23.640 That's the second Tuesday of the month and we'll continue on. We've got some good stuff coming up for the fall, which I will share with you at that time. So thank you, everyone, for signing in and we'll see you again soon.

01:21:40.680 Dorenda, if you could stay on for a minute, that'd be great. Bye bye, everyone.

Action4Canada - August 25, 2023

Homeschooling with Durenda Wilson - August 22, 2023

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript