Action4Canada - How to Juggle Work Dynamics, Homeschooling, and Parenting for Busy Moms

00:00:00.000 hello hi there it's doris livingstone here with action for canada i'm the homeschool lead

00:00:09.960 and we talk about everything homeschooling to help you folks along in your journey whether

00:00:16.260 you're beginning or halfway through or very seasoned and you're in your high school years

00:00:21.700 already and i want to show you a couple of things on our website so i'm going to take you there right

00:00:27.960 now and uh show you our first our home screen anyways and uh when you get to the home screen

00:00:38.180 and open up action for canada.com you want to go to current issues and uh when that opens up you

00:00:46.500 scroll down to the homeschool revolution i love that word because that is what's happening in our

00:00:52.920 country and right at the top here you'll see our directory you can tap that that opens up and

00:01:01.020 shows all the um provincial contacts so for example if you live in let's just scroll down and change it

00:01:08.860 up here a bit if you go to prince edward island you can tap on this website here or you can email them

00:01:19.460 direct and these are the uh home provincial groups that will help you uh start your journey and help you

00:01:28.220 find your sort of regional area of support whether it's uh um co-ops for the kids play groups for the

00:01:36.180 kids uh support groups for parents and on on every province's website i've looked through all of them

00:01:43.100 and they've got lots of information they got uh your your laws and uh regulations for your province

00:01:50.560 they've got resources of videos a lot of how-tos um other links on homeschooling they talk about

00:01:58.280 curriculum and so there's lots there to look at i'm going to go back to this first page and scroll

00:02:07.260 down a bit if you know anybody who wants to join the homeschool webinars you want to go right here

00:02:14.800 on the right and press sign up here and you'll get the um newsletters they come out every two weeks

00:02:21.900 our webinars are the second and fourth tuesday mornings um well i guess it depends where you live but

00:02:29.700 i'm in bc so 10 o'clock pst on those tuesdays and uh to find out um the upcoming

00:02:41.460 conventions scroll a little further down we've got these so far that are confirmed for 2025

00:02:49.860 i always highly recommend you get to a convention you will be encouraged and inspired you get to see

00:02:56.500 curriculum you get to talk to other parents and network and you uh listen to some phenomenal

00:03:04.180 speakers that just help help you along the way here is where we find our main homeschool webinars

00:03:11.100 and everything we've ever done here at action for canada's of homeschooling related is here

00:03:18.300 and so today the work dynamics homeschooling and parenting for busy moms topic is listed

00:03:25.720 and if you scroll down you will see the other things we've done how dads can show support of

00:03:33.580 the homeschool we did last time with jason weaning that was amazing and teaching styles and it goes on

00:03:41.720 and on and on you can just scroll down i'm going to go way down and see what we have got down here

00:03:48.140 david hunt i brought his name up before from the aristotle foundation he gave um an overview

00:03:55.680 a research that was done for um students that were ages 21 to 39 i think how they're doing today

00:04:04.920 and their stats and they they scored exceptionally high i think 99 percent in most categories and uh if

00:04:14.360 you were ever worried about socialization this survey um would be a great resource to give to

00:04:21.600 friends and family or those who are concerned about socialization because that subject seems to always

00:04:27.880 come up and so that's a good one to um to share okay i'm going to pop out of that and come back to

00:04:37.020 the main screen and so welcome everybody uh lori dunbar is my assistant and she is going to introduce

00:04:44.700 our guests here today thank you laurie yeah i'm so excited for today as we were talking about

00:04:52.540 possible webinars this one came up because increasingly homeschool moms find themselves 0.62

00:04:57.540 wrestling with the dynamics of nurturing and educating their children while taking care of

00:05:02.340 other responsibilities so whether you work on a home-based business or volunteer for an organization

00:05:07.240 or you're employed outside the home this webinar is going to be for you

00:05:11.520 we're going to explore homeschooling and parenting and work dynamics for busy moms and as we were 0.65

00:05:16.940 talking about this these ladies came to mind because i have actually worked with them through 1.00

00:05:22.400 she be the saskatchewan home-based educator board at different times and i'm excited to introduce to

00:05:28.660 you pamela she's a homeschool mom of four from saskatchewan who lives on a homestead with multi-generational

00:05:34.540 family where she works and helps manage the family business she holds a master's degree

00:05:41.020 in social work and she works part-time supporting autistic children and their families in addition

00:05:46.980 to her professional and homeschooling roles pamela has served both as the journal editor and president

00:05:53.660 for the saskatchewan home-based educators during during her two-year tenure jillian smith is a wife of

00:06:00.580 one and a mom of five and together jillian and her husband run a small regenerative farm

00:06:06.880 in northwest saskatchewan they started home home educating formerly when their oldest daughter was

00:06:12.540 five and haven't looked back today their oldest two have moved forward with their adult plans

00:06:17.980 while others continue to home educate jillian is fully convinced that homeschooling is possible for

00:06:24.300 anyone who has the desire jillian has also served on the saskatchewan home-based educator board for a

00:06:30.080 number of years so welcome ladies i'm excited to have you here and so i've given a brief introduction

00:06:36.640 but i'm wondering if you ladies would be able to introduce yourselves with how many kids you have 1.00

00:06:42.380 kind of the general age ranges how long you've been homeschooling and what led you into homeschooling

00:06:47.820 so pamela take it away great i i have four kids and i'm teaching them from high school all the way down

00:06:57.600 to learning how to read um we started homeschooling i think about five years ago my two oldest were in

00:07:07.700 school my two youngest never went to school uh we pulled them because the school wasn't really doing

00:07:13.480 what we needed for them there's common complaints you know there's no perfect system but ultimately

00:07:20.280 once we had them home and um we carried on we really came to the awareness that it was really

00:07:28.860 came down to god's calling for parents to educate their children and we didn't see how the public

00:07:35.480 system was able to do that and to raise them in the ways of the lord so that would be why we do it now

00:07:42.580 i wouldn't say that's necessarily why we pulled them from the school but that would be our conviction

00:07:47.840 that keeps us going yeah that's awesome how about you jillian uh so we have five kids um age range

00:07:57.280 is 21 down to eight um our two oldest have uh flown the nest so to speak um our oldest is taking her

00:08:06.760 um bachelor of science through athabasca university uh she intends to go on to nate and do um the lab tech

00:08:16.700 uh x-ray tech program there our next oldest is a boy and he is uh not academically inclined bright

00:08:27.080 enough but just not inclined so he has uh chosen to do the trades which is great he is drywalling in

00:08:35.740 lloydminster for a fellow who goes to our church um we have a 16 year old and he is working through his

00:08:44.620 grade uh 11 material and again he's he does not love school but we are requiring him to complete a

00:08:53.540 certain level and he would like to carry on and go into heavy duty mechanics and our 13 year old she is

00:09:01.860 um doing her grade 8 work and she's she's a spitfire she's one of the ones who is a challenge 0.99

00:09:10.940 at times and our eight-year-old who's in grade three and he is just the baby of the family um we

00:09:19.720 started homeschooling our oldest when she was five and i'm not sure our our reasons for homeschooling

00:09:26.760 were as solidified then as they are now um living in a remoter area of um northwest alberta uh up against

00:09:40.140 the bc border and where our farm was we could the closest school would have been in bc in near

00:09:48.080 dawson creek but as because we were alberton residents the school that you would attend would

00:09:55.600 have been about an hour's bus drive one way and so putting our little five-year-old on that bus

00:10:00.460 and it just it wasn't tenable for us we looked at the situation we looked at the kids we knew were

00:10:06.880 going to be on that bus and we just said i'm not we're not doing it um i had been homeschooled

00:10:13.280 my parents were both teachers my husband's mother was a teacher and we said yeah we can do this and so

00:10:21.280 we never looked back she started there was some opposition and and there you're going to find

00:10:25.760 opposition um from family sometimes and i think my husband's parents were not fully on board they were

00:10:34.160 very concerned about homeschooling i think because my my mother-in-law had seen some bad examples

00:10:41.960 um of kids who were pulled from the school system the public school system homeschooled and then

00:10:49.080 put back right and there was that back and forth flow and she it was her opinion that it was a bad deal

00:10:56.640 um but uh by about the second or third year of homeschooling they were fully on board with us

00:11:04.740 um but that the proof was i think the proof is in the eating of the pudding um they could see that

00:11:12.560 our oldest had learned to read that she was a capable you know that we weren't just

00:11:19.680 homeschooling homeschooling in name only do you know what i mean um so there was a a dedication to

00:11:27.520 academic excellence and yeah so now our our our goals and our convictions are different at the time it

00:11:37.640 was almost out of fear that we were homeschooling and now much more convicted that this is a

00:11:45.600 um a needed opportunity to speak into your children's lives to direct their education to

00:11:55.440 direct the the curriculum and the material that they are going to be exposed to absolutely that's

00:12:02.320 great so good so each of you have oh and doris actually doris why don't you just give us a little

00:12:09.380 bit of a background to your experience in this area um so yeah i mean most people have who've watched me

00:12:19.500 over the last two years might know they put the puzzle together but i'll put it in a nutshell um we

00:12:25.480 started homeschooling right from kindergarten and so k to 12 and my girl i got two three of the kids

00:12:32.600 three kids two are married and one's uh dating single but dating um and so we were happily doing life

00:12:44.240 until my husband was uh killed in an accident and my kids were 13 15 and 16 and so um but i had a lot

00:12:55.340 of support i was very connected not only to my little town and my church but to my homeschool community

00:13:01.980 and it was all hands on deck everybody helped us get along and move forward um but in a work-related

00:13:10.520 life we also had at the beginning of our homeschooling years we were running three businesses

00:13:16.840 and on top of my others my husband's other job his regular job and so life was very busy and um

00:13:24.960 and i can talk a little bit more about that later on and how i managed to homeschool

00:13:30.360 um and uh i was basically an office manager and a bookkeeper but i was able to work from home

00:13:36.800 and i'll tell you how i did that as we go into this later anyways i am just to wrap that up my girls uh

00:13:43.800 we graduated them all through homeschooling and they're all thriving they're doing very well

00:13:49.000 and i'm a grandma that's so good to hear yeah well let's actually go into that so each of you have

00:13:56.200 um responsibilities at work or in the family business and what how does that affect your

00:14:01.720 scheduling for your homeschool so pamela you work outside the home uh what does that look like for

00:14:08.500 your homeschooling well we i work two days a week so i um schedule a lot of their independent work

00:14:17.600 on the days that that i'm at work so the two or the kids are responsible for doing their independent

00:14:25.780 work and i check it at the end of the day we have some successful days and some days where maybe they

00:14:33.340 didn't get as much done or any that i asked them to but i do have a schedule set up where there is

00:14:40.000 some grace so because i actually will then school them um the other three days the month or the

00:14:47.620 mornings are sacred like i i generally try not to book anything um on those mornings or like that

00:14:57.460 anything comes up it has to be pretty pretty serious for me to accept or to walk away just because

00:15:04.420 those mornings are when i do our family work and then we actually do some school i call it our group

00:15:11.020 work on saturdays so my kids are actually doing school six days a week but it's a very um lenient

00:15:19.720 and um kind of giving schedule so they kind of do it as they will two days a week and then three days a

00:15:27.280 week it's very if very hardcore like we get up we start at eight o'clock we're doing our group work

00:15:33.640 together all morning we usually finish around 12 or one and then they have to do more independent

00:15:39.480 work but that's only three days a week and so the rest of the time they might be spending an hour

00:15:45.160 maybe if they just sit down and do their work it takes them about an hour and then saturdays

00:15:51.060 like our group work is really um kind of how we start our day and and any of the subjects we do

00:15:56.940 together as a group yeah that's great how about you jillian you have a farm and lots of things going

00:16:04.660 on in your life how does that affect your scheduling well we get up early and we do morning chores we

00:16:12.200 have animals that have to be fed watered tended to 24 7 and 7 days a week all year round so those

00:16:22.400 chores are delineated everybody knows what they're supposed to do and if somebody's sick or you know

00:16:27.320 we cover for each other but we try and get to our school work like the the core work um by 8 30 or 9

00:16:35.640 that's kind of the cutoff for us we make sure that we're busy and we know what they know the kids know

00:16:41.480 what they need to do um we have chosen curriculum for that very reason and yeah mornings are sacred

00:16:49.720 we don't unless it's really important um we do not deviate from a morning schedule um and we just

00:17:00.320 i don't i don't take calls i don't do anything uh from about nine o'clock till till lunchtime um

00:17:08.420 anything else has to just wait because that time is important for the kids to have my attention

00:17:14.380 that's great and doris you kind of alluded to this but what about you what is what did scheduling look

00:17:22.280 like to you scheduling for me was um because my husband worked shift work when and i i had to i had

00:17:32.740 a month to do everything so as long as i met my targets by month end when the kids go to bed

00:17:40.060 seven or eight depending on their age i would head down to the office when my husband was at work my

00:17:48.280 office was in the house and so i would do two or three hours and i'd go hard um and that wasn't every

00:17:57.480 day that was when i knew i had either the mental energy or uh i had a deadline which kind of forced me

00:18:08.980 i had a week perhaps to reach that deadline perhaps um but it was always around my husband's schedule

00:18:16.340 and i knew i could see it in advance when he was going to work and then i chose that those are the

00:18:22.240 nights i'm going to be in the office yeah that's good and jillian you you kind of led into my next

00:18:28.360 question i was going to ask how does curriculum affect you know things and how do you choose

00:18:34.040 curriculum knowing your responsibilities well with for every family it's going to be the context

00:18:40.920 of your family right um some children do better with a spiral approach to math and some do better

00:18:48.900 with a mastery so you're you're gonna have to be flexible um in our context uh we have chosen material

00:18:58.140 that i mix and match i'm i'm a terrible example probably but i mix and match i have material that

00:19:05.580 is self-directed for the kids and um i'm not going to mention any names by or any curriculum by name

00:19:16.040 but it's a packet and there's they they know they have four or five pages to do in that booklet

00:19:23.340 that's their goal for that day they cross it off they set the next goal um but that's not in all

00:19:30.900 subjects because there's subjects like say for math i really like the spiral approach of a particular

00:19:39.640 curriculum but we've had to flex sometimes because it hasn't always worked perfectly for the student so

00:19:46.960 then you pause and you say okay so now we're going to switch over to this mastery style and the beauty

00:19:53.240 of that homeschooling is you can tailor it for the child and that's why we're doing this is we're

00:19:58.840 doing it so that our child gets the best result possible again for science um there's curriculums

00:20:07.400 that i prefer and that takes my time particularly in the younger grades the older kids are able to work

00:20:14.060 independently you give them the textbook and you say i want you to do this much per day um to get

00:20:20.380 through like and that teaches them responsibility it teaches them some um level of personal

00:20:27.680 integrity because they know that they need to get this work done but with the younger kids again you're

00:20:33.520 um i have to take that time to do the reading with them perhaps teach the lesson but we we have chosen

00:20:41.780 the material we have to free up um myself or my husband to be able to be flexible and say hey this kid

00:20:50.900 needs a little more work but i'm not neglecting the other three or four um and they're just sitting there

00:20:57.640 spinning their wheels or taking off and going and playing minecraft or something right so they have work

00:21:04.480 they know what it is it's set out and it's tight for me that's very important um because i

00:21:10.960 giving them a rounded and robust um education is really important yeah i love that actually that was

00:21:23.540 that was actually a comment that i i wanted to make was how do you protect that that standard of

00:21:29.200 education in the midst of a busy life right so i thank you for speaking to that that's great how

00:21:34.920 about you pamela uh well for us it's um i find like it's important to teach that independence early

00:21:42.960 and soon because kids can um strive upwards and it's a great uh just a character building skill as well

00:21:52.960 so what i call when i said we have their independent studies that's always math and science

00:21:58.720 um they do that on their own i don't teach those except for the really little people my three

00:22:04.880 oldest are on their own and then my youngest he's just learning to read so i do most of my like one

00:22:11.260 on one with him if they need help i'm available um so that and then also i also give like reading

00:22:17.820 that's a lot of more social type subjects but they often will get um and quality literature so i'll

00:22:25.780 assign certain books for them to read sometimes they narrate it um back to me occasionally but we

00:22:32.760 actually do the rest of it is through family like family time and that's what our mornings are so

00:22:39.520 we do a lot of subjects we always we do together and i i use that morning time for many things i mean

00:22:46.800 there's the education aspect obviously we do a lot of character building during morning time

00:22:51.740 um it's really kind of family time to spend with each other and we teach to the highest level so my

00:22:59.700 for example my oldest is in high school and we're doing business as one of her subjects and they're

00:23:07.180 all involved so i i chose a curriculum and it is at a high school level and they might have to read a

00:23:15.080 little bit or i might read and summarize it but we all do end up like questions gets discussed so

00:23:22.140 my oldest obviously might spend a little extra time afterwards doing a little extra but everybody's

00:23:27.740 involved so we will just kind of discuss as a family and i i find that even the younger ones because

00:23:34.540 say my five-year-old might not be involved in that he might be kind of running around doing his own

00:23:40.560 thing but my next one up he um it would be grade five and she does get quite involved and she answers

00:23:48.820 we also do logic so she'll answer questions and it's it's quite amazing how well they do and so i i

00:23:57.700 would i would always encourage like there's nothing wrong with doing group work and picking a subject

00:24:02.640 that is well beyond their years because the logic for example is actually a biblically based logic

00:24:08.900 and i'll have her do it again because it's part of our fundamental core to our full 12-year

00:24:16.140 curriculum for the kids she'll do it again because like she's not getting the full thing but she's

00:24:21.620 getting stuff and i've always taught that way so when she gets older and we do it again it's not going

00:24:26.940 to be an unfamiliar concept to her it'll be familiar and so i think she'll actually get more out of it

00:24:32.840 at that point than say my grade 11 student would work now because she's just kind of learning the 0.94

00:24:39.500 concepts so the mornings we structure it we have we always do like our bible studies and our devotions

00:24:45.980 together um we have some character study built into that and then we do our socials uh history

00:24:53.520 um we're like right now we're doing world war um one and like i said the logic and business

00:24:59.940 and so that's just really kind of spending time we watch videos together we have discussions

00:25:05.120 um and we do the activities together and then like i said with the younger ones they participate as much

00:25:11.120 as they can i've had my one son who's five for example who might have gotten bored because like i said

00:25:16.600 it is several hours we spend from eight to twelve together he might wander away and we'll be talking

00:25:24.320 and i'm i'm thinking he's just playing but he'll be hollering answers from the other room so like if

00:25:30.000 it's something that sounds familiar to him and he knows what we're talking about suddenly he pipes up

00:25:34.620 and we hear him shout something and uh and we're like and it kind of makes the family laugh so um i very

00:25:41.900 much encourage things that are subjects that you can make independent to teach them young how to kind

00:25:47.760 of do it on their own and i started young with my little grade five student like there was lots of

00:25:54.220 times where i she wasn't maybe quite ready but i was teaching her the independence so i would have her

00:25:59.020 sit at the table and do it and i was just kind of like a few chairs away or in the living room and so

00:26:05.820 she would ask me questions like crazy but it was like those in-between moments and then it was

00:26:11.480 less questions and less so i was there kind of helping her through it and she knew that but it

00:26:17.600 just it's you you do need to teach independence it builds confidence and and they get pretty excited

00:26:23.600 when they finish it so a lot of our curriculum i choose is can they do it independently i do look a

00:26:30.520 lot at how involved is the the parent have to be but on the other hand it is funny because i don't base

00:26:38.380 it on that so i do pick out a pull a curriculum that could be completely independent based and then

00:26:43.900 here i am reading the entire textbook to the kids because we've decided to make that a group

00:26:48.420 curriculum so it really is what works for you um for our family our biggest thing is we flow

00:26:54.700 everything through our christian faith so we we choose to do all our subjects are fundamentally based

00:27:01.280 they're biblically based and and we're raising them in our values so like the business for example

00:27:08.060 is a christian viewpoint and kind of talks about what um it's really a more rounded about how the

00:27:15.840 world works it's kind of an economics as well so and we talk about all sorts of things i think we're

00:27:20.120 still on chapter one at this point and it might end up being a two-year course so and that's the other

00:27:25.860 thing is don't don't let the curriculum define you so if it takes you two years to do it that's fine

00:27:32.660 that's awesome so much wisdom there that's fantastic uh my next question is how do you how do you protect

00:27:41.580 your family attachment your family life when in regards to other activities for yourself and for your

00:27:50.620 kids so doris why don't you take that one can you say that again there was a lot in that sentence

00:27:58.240 how do you protect your family life in regards to your um like opportunities for yourself and

00:28:09.400 extracurriculars for your kids like how do you make those decisions as a working mom

00:28:14.060 well i guess because i was able to work in the evenings my days were far more flexible um

00:28:26.200 and so i was just thinking about what the other two ladies were saying about juggling uh like 0.81

00:28:34.560 prioritizing in in different uh curriculums and so sometimes i get a phone call a business call

00:28:41.580 during school hours so i i made the decision no personal calls in the morning they could wait

00:28:48.140 till the afternoon but the business calls they would come in and this is the old school stuff

00:28:53.340 before cell phones so um if i recognized the call display i would take the call um and so those had to

00:29:01.860 happen because they were answering a question that i needed answered as well so i could keep working

00:29:07.740 but outside of that um i kind of incorporated everything we did as school so one of our

00:29:18.680 businesses was a floating fish store and um so i would the kids were very young this was in the

00:29:26.480 earliest years they would have been like three five and seven or so or even yeah about that and we'd

00:29:33.400 walk down the plank to the dock and like three little ducklings behind me but i had to check

00:29:37.960 in on the staff and so the kids are watching what i'm doing and that was part of school we're outside

00:29:45.420 i was learning about fish because i didn't know anything about fish um so i was learning a pile of

00:29:52.080 stuff we would then take the kids when the salmon run or spawning we would go do that in the fall and

00:29:59.620 that was part of our school so even though i was working um and they went in the car with me to

00:30:07.400 certain places everything was educational and so that was one part and then in the evenings when

00:30:15.720 everything was like i'm done i need some time things like ladies bible study was really important

00:30:22.500 to me so i was feeding into my soul um i was on the worship team so i i i knew thursday nights i was

00:30:29.420 not home and um how did i work that i guess with my husband i would have only played if he was home

00:30:36.880 occasionally i might have got a babysitter so as i'm taking care of the other personal interests

00:30:43.960 i was able to get refueled and put all out again in the deck in the next morning so i covered a lot

00:30:51.840 there i don't know if i can answer the question clearly but uh no that's good yeah i i appreciate how

00:30:58.220 you touched on involving your kids in in life because that is education uh jillian and pamela i'm sure

00:31:05.620 that you do that because you both live on on farms and uh anything else you want to add to that that

00:31:12.040 comment um well i actually think homeschooling is more conducive to family connections your kids are

00:31:21.960 with you all the time so for us we my husband he contracts out but also has his own business so

00:31:30.340 when he is home i'm in the shop lots of times my son is out having shop class so he's out working with

00:31:38.080 his dad learning the trade um and also like you just spend your time doing it all my kids help with

00:31:47.820 the farm they help with the animals they all have chores we just kind of make it work throughout the

00:31:52.460 day when it works um and for the extracurricular stuff we actually because there is that aspect

00:32:00.120 about we've chosen not to kind of follow the the mainstream culture with packing our activities

00:32:09.340 for extracurricular we made that decision a long time ago though and it wasn't even related to

00:32:14.620 homeschooling because we live rurally we have to drive everywhere and so we chose one particular

00:32:21.360 sport that all the kids participate in um and actually this is the first year all four are in

00:32:26.800 because the youngest was just old enough and each year we watched as the little ones they were so

00:32:31.980 excited to start because the bigger ones were doing it and they wanted to be part of it so they have

00:32:36.540 the one sport and then there's all we do swimming as well and so we actually chose activities we can do

00:32:44.340 together that's not to say there hasn't been my one son was into track or cross-country running so

00:32:50.980 it was a short season and so those like short season type things we were always willing to consider

00:32:57.060 we drove him to the school for one month every day it was wild but it was only a month so we would make

00:33:03.760 it work between me and my parents and my husband we would somehow get him there um so like we would

00:33:11.360 determine is it important and like do we have the time will it you know impact our family in a negative

00:33:19.120 way so there are times the kids will do something that is obviously unique and individual to them and

00:33:25.060 um but but when you raise kids up in a culture that is very much um kind of growing those family bonds a

00:33:33.240 lot of times they're more than happy to just spend time with with their family in balance with their

00:33:38.940 friends and their activities so i just find that that's what the homeschooling does because our

00:33:46.500 kids are very much more warm and including of children of all ages than a public schoolers who have been

00:33:53.780 raised and taught in in like a very peer centered um they struggle with the multi-generational aspect

00:34:02.180 whereas my children had to learn how to play with themselves that was just the way it was so um and

00:34:11.940 and often when they got together with other groups it was other of course homeschool families so

00:34:16.220 they may not have someone their age so what did they do they had to kind of figure out okay well this

00:34:21.860 person's close to my age or sometimes you have the older kids who will you know go down and and help

00:34:26.780 with the little guys so it's really about fostering those relationships and and teaching your children

00:34:32.140 that um that you they can find connections um with all ages with all people um and and we just

00:34:41.040 prioritize family it's just it's always been prior to homeschool or not it's always been kind of our

00:34:45.560 mantra family is the most important thing how do we work those things that we want in life

00:34:49.880 into our family that's awesome i always think that you're gonna have friends come and go but you're

00:34:57.680 gonna have family always so how do we protect those relationships and and our connection for sure

00:35:03.020 jillian do you have anything to add there oh yeah uh just just briefly um like in the uh pinterest

00:35:11.880 or not pinterest what is it instagram world everything is content so every opportunity is a learning

00:35:18.840 opportunity for your kids uh shop class up up at the shop with dad learning how to change oil um

00:35:25.800 woodworking all those things can be educational taking your kids with you shopping grocery shopping

00:35:33.280 teaching them how to economize teaching them how to look at the prices and say oh is that a good deal

00:35:39.340 no it's not because those are all learning opportunities and they're going to benefit them

00:35:44.660 later in life um yeah so there's there's the curriculum that you choose but there's so much

00:35:52.840 more there's learning how to cook there's learning how to budget there's all of those things and those

00:35:57.780 are things that you can teach um just naturally as you go along mm-hmm so i'm wondering how you guys

00:36:07.060 prioritize um your spiritual life in the midst of your busyness you've got family you've got homeschooling

00:36:13.560 you've got all kinds of commitments how do you prioritize your spiritual life your own personal

00:36:19.220 spiritual life in the spiritual life of your kids in the midst of a busy life so doris do you want to

00:36:24.280 speak to that one first sure um well like i said uh i was part of a ladies bible study group and so doing

00:36:33.060 the homework was the challenge and so um i usually found an hour in the afternoon if they were outside

00:36:41.820 playing um or again if my husband was at work then i had an hour there um it was never in the morning

00:36:49.720 because that was all about school but the shower was my prayer closet nobody was going to bother me

00:36:58.140 there so i managed to catch a few minutes with the lord there and then um the curriculum itself

00:37:06.820 our world history curriculum i made i made it over four years and uh we started right from the beginning

00:37:14.160 with creation and not halfway where a lot of world history just sort of plunks just starts

00:37:19.560 and i incorporated uh so i wanted a biblical um lens of teaching and simultaneously

00:37:29.780 if there was something from the secular world that lined up where it was written in the bible i got really

00:37:36.180 excited about it and so our our spiritual lessons in some way came through that way of curriculum

00:37:44.080 where we were talking about god and um the foundations of the world and god's perspective on different

00:37:51.820 things and um and then around the meals we prayed over our food uh first thing in the morning

00:37:59.960 um was a challenge i found to make it sort of a um a spiritual time together but as much as we could we did start our sessions with prayer

00:38:11.800 um yeah you it's it's a juggling act but i tried to stay consistent as much as i could um

00:38:21.420 living living with a shift working husband was the challenge because when he was off he was

00:38:28.900 in our space all day long he was around and so you know we would shift things around when he was home

00:38:36.900 and it was amazing to have him around because it gave me a break they could go do stuff with dad

00:38:42.000 and learn stuff with dad and because his faith in god was um exciting as well like he brought all kinds

00:38:50.680 of stuff into teaching the children in the car when they're going somewhere so all these little windows

00:38:58.340 of bringing god into the day i love that i love the windows like just being able to prioritize

00:39:05.520 okay i don't have an hour but maybe i have you know 15 minutes to get into the word you know just

00:39:13.040 get centered on the lord and and that's that's super important we did that too we we actually started our

00:39:18.400 day with family devotions and then going to history and things like that and uh that that time in the

00:39:24.260 word was priceless i really gave them a good foundation jillian how about you so this is this is one of

00:39:33.380 those things that i think is um can be a a touchy subject with um with church families um dads aren't

00:39:42.760 always um filling that role of leadership and wives moms aren't always um i'm going to say a bad word

00:39:51.760 here submitting to their husband's uh leadership um it's really important i think that both moms and dads

00:39:59.940 look at their the roles given in scripture to husbands and wives and parents um and dads need

00:40:10.580 to be involved in this and i'm not sure how many dads will watch this but um dads you need to be

00:40:18.000 leading your families and leading them in uh devotions and that's a biblical principle you are the leader of

00:40:25.940 the home mom's your backup you are there like most of the day right our time is spent uh teaching our

00:40:34.260 kids and so you and your husband need to be on us on a similar page uh i would encourage uh to that end

00:40:41.240 um because we're we're up early we have chores we have all those things going on we do family breakfast

00:40:48.140 um and we're up early my husband's up at 5 36 in the morning and he's doing his morning devotions

00:40:55.940 as he's also prepping sometimes for speaking at church um but once i get up um i try and take

00:41:05.460 about 15 20 minutes in the morning to do bible reading um some prayer time and then we get the

00:41:10.860 kids up and we're at breakfast and while they're finishing up their breakfast my husband is leading

00:41:15.720 them in family devotions um that's just the pattern that we've chosen it isn't necessarily

00:41:21.900 uh prescriptive it's descriptive if you know what i mean um scripture doesn't say you must do it in the

00:41:29.780 morning or you must do it in the evening but we should do it um and we've chosen books to go through

00:41:37.720 um you can get pamphlets uh just as an example we did jet through revelations it's just an overview

00:41:45.400 of revelation and that's been very interesting the kids even even the kid who was six at the time

00:41:52.220 was picking up on stuff and the older kids were like wow that's interesting never heard that before

00:41:57.140 and so it was although it was a big a big subject we all learned something we were all growing and um

00:42:05.540 it gives our gospel opportunities for your kids because just because we go to church doesn't mean that

00:42:10.520 that child or that individual is is saved so it gives you gospel opportunities opportunities to

00:42:17.480 see a window into their lives and what's going on in their head um but yeah we we prioritize that as a

00:42:23.700 family um but again it doesn't have to be in the morning but you'd need to find a space where you

00:42:31.340 can do it and do it consistently that's good how about you pamela uh well we've um kind of done some

00:42:40.880 we schedule certain things and just what works for us um and then there's some times where you just

00:42:48.320 find those smaller moments so like when it comes to our mornings uh like the homeschooling

00:42:55.880 we we start with uh like i'm trying to teach my kids like how to pray and things so we're always

00:43:03.600 we're doing it together um and then we our school starts with bible devotion or devotions and bible

00:43:11.960 study and and we go i call it my little fondue so i i have a certain order that goes through because

00:43:20.420 if my day gets cut all of our our worship and devotion is the last thing like it won't likely

00:43:27.380 touch it unless we absolutely had to cancel the day so um that way we fill our um worship

00:43:34.940 top and then it flows down to the next and what we have it'll keep flowing until we're done so

00:43:42.280 that's one way i try and do it as i try to put god as the center at the beginning and then everything

00:43:48.420 will flow from there um and then we have little things that we do that kind of became traditions

00:43:54.240 years ago um we we were at for like for example we went to a thanksgiving my kids were very young

00:44:01.460 and they said let's do a thank you around the table for thanksgiving and i i was like this is so much fun

00:44:07.760 so we actually started doing that every single night because we eat suppers together where we thanked god

00:44:13.580 for something and that was years and years ago and so we'd still to this day do it and it's just

00:44:20.900 we make our kids say what they're thankful for it even when they're angry and mad because we're like

00:44:25.800 you can be thankful for something even in the hardest moments and so we take a moment um before we eat to

00:44:34.060 thank god for what we do have what we're appreciative of the day and so like little things like that that's

00:44:39.700 kind of more like a tradition we have um and it's one way to kind of keep the kids focused on who we're

00:44:46.820 thanking why we're thankful um it also helps to start conversations and discussions we we go to a church

00:44:55.260 that has a sunday school so i do that partly because then that's before church there's somebody else

00:45:02.580 um teaching my children so i kind of like that i love teaching my kids and i think that um that's

00:45:10.320 what i've been called to do but i also think there's a benefit from them sitting in a group with someone

00:45:16.320 else you know giving them kind of like guidance and teaching them that isn't necessarily a mom

00:45:22.040 so we do that uh before that's the church we just go to um not all churches have it i understand

00:45:28.960 so things like that for us um and then a big thing i found this year like we when i i finally started

00:45:38.480 putting like i don't want to say god first god's been first but where we prioritized our devotions

00:45:46.400 first and if nothing else got done i just accepted that that's okay it will get done it will it'll be

00:45:53.360 fine it'll not panic about the academic stuff that would seem to be like a turning point

00:45:58.640 um and i actually focused very much on choosing curriculum that was biblically based because

00:46:06.780 there are still some oh that was interesting there's there's there's still some good curriculum that

00:46:14.200 isn't like fundamentally fundamentally built through christianity and there's nothing wrong with that

00:46:21.020 curriculum right like you can still take um fairly neutral curriculum and the kids can learn wonderful

00:46:27.660 things from it but i did decide that we're gonna just do it so that that way we can fill our cup

00:46:34.120 regularly all the time even in those independent things that i'm not around to be with them and

00:46:39.880 they're doing on their own and i just found this when we started doing that god just came up in

00:46:46.120 discussion more often my kids were just and and over the last couple years this year it's like you're

00:46:53.320 i started seeing some of that fruit because my kids like for example my son did archaeology last

00:46:58.620 year for his science but it was like archaeology on what biblical scholars had discovered and found

00:47:05.680 and all the information around their discoveries and so once in a while we'll be talking about

00:47:10.600 something in our bible study and my son will be like oh they found that and so they start discussing

00:47:16.460 so like as you start layering it they start making connections and it it takes a couple years and

00:47:22.340 you just got to trust the process but they they do start to kind of layer and see multiple levels and

00:47:30.360 how everything interwines and interacts and then character studies is a big one we integrated like

00:47:38.620 their actual character studies that we use and we kind of use what works for us and i said earlier that we

00:47:45.160 teach up to a high level but there are times that we i pick a curriculum and it's meant for like

00:47:51.560 little people my entire family may do it so i have my high schooler and i'm like yeah it's a little

00:47:57.020 juvenile but we make it work for everyone and the older ones still participate and i find the character

00:48:03.800 studies are often like that because they they think that you're going to do this and teach to little

00:48:07.600 people but there's so much value for older kids as well and so we do a lot of that and sometimes again

00:48:15.140 but in those moments where you start seeing them like pull in pieces and you're just you see the

00:48:21.960 growth and you're like okay so when you're first starting you don't see that initially and it's

00:48:27.740 really hard and you just got to keep pushing through and you just got to kind of that's when

00:48:33.520 there's a lot of that trust and and faith in the lord in your walk but within a few years

00:48:39.680 and i'd say years because you just got to trust it'll come it will and you'll start to see that

00:48:45.080 fruit and it's so exciting to see it happen when the kids start to grow and develop and you're like

00:48:51.520 oh they're learning yeah that's awesome thank you and pamela i just wanted to also touch on a

00:48:58.860 conversation you and i had had and you said that you have an exit plan would you be able to explain

00:49:04.920 what you meant by that as far as as uh as you're working outside the home what do you mean you'll

00:49:12.220 have to refresh my memory on my exit plan well you had said that you said that um that it's not ideal

00:49:19.540 to be working outside the home oh oh yeah that kind of exit plan yeah okay so i i work because i can

00:49:28.660 create a stable like that kind of stable base so we modified um i was born um and raised in a very

00:49:39.200 classical liberal home very much belief of you know like the women should they have the right to work 1.00

00:49:47.220 they should go and get highly educated like i i'm one of two girls we both have master's degrees it was 1.00

00:49:55.760 like where my path was going when my husband and i first got married i had dreams of being the ceo of

00:50:02.680 something and so when we kind of first moved out to where we live now many many years ago like i don't

00:50:08.980 know 15 15 years i think it's been things started to radically change um i'd only been married a few

00:50:17.400 years but we moved out here i was newly married i had a baby and it was the the birth of my oldest so

00:50:24.100 things changed but i went from working like full-time with these huge ambitions to to adjusting

00:50:30.660 our lifestyle i was part-time and then we downgraded it to two days a week and then i got my master's

00:50:37.200 which took many years but when she talks about this exit plan is if i could go back i probably

00:50:43.500 wouldn't go through what i went through because i see the world very differently and so i raise my

00:50:49.680 children very differently i look at my daughters and i say there's nothing wrong if god calls you

00:50:56.200 to a profession and you want to work there's nothing wrong if you marry and in a season or

00:51:03.380 even for your whole marriage you have to work because it's what will keep your family financially

00:51:09.500 secure that's that's fine that's good that's god's calling for you so it's not that i'm

00:51:15.680 against it i just asked my daughters to say if this is the lifestyle you choose which is like a

00:51:23.500 homeschool um raising in in this kind of we live on a homestead we're very multi-generational

00:51:29.860 then you need to ask yourself how invested into the academics like post-secondary and type stuff are

00:51:36.640 you going to get so i just want to say like i say to them don't go and say get a degree if your plan

00:51:43.300 is just have babies and be a uh stay-at-home mom there are other ways you can learn like you can

00:51:48.560 become an entrepreneur you can um get a certificate and do something to support your family from home

00:51:54.000 you can work from home so there's all these other options than just going to university because that's

00:51:57.800 what i was told so when she's talking about the exit plan for me i do have i would like to just

00:52:04.060 go home full-time and not have to worry about working outside the home but that would that doesn't

00:52:10.400 mean i wouldn't be working and so i explain that the kids understand that so my husband's business i

00:52:15.540 i do all his book work and all of that so like as his wife i'm still working i'm still providing

00:52:22.900 that kind of um professional um services and he's also a mechanic so i also provide say like your

00:52:34.120 your advisor type which i did when i was younger i was an advisor at a dealership so so those are the

00:52:41.080 kind of things it's that is it work outside the home or work inside the home that kind of builds up

00:52:48.640 a family so my exit goal is when my husband gets to a point because he's transitioning from contract work

00:52:56.760 to customer work there is one day i hope that his business will um when he kind of moves into the

00:53:05.760 new one will will bring in enough that i can step back and just focus um being at home um i do also

00:53:14.140 have the options as a social worker like i shouldn't i don't want to make anyone think that i went and i got

00:53:20.060 all this education it wasn't worth it whatever god has in store for me that could be i could do

00:53:25.120 counseling um privately but it would be i would very much have changed things to be what can i do

00:53:33.380 from home with flexibility of time because right now i am on the schedule of two days a week i have

00:53:40.080 to be in um at work from eight o'clock to 4 30 no matter what there's no there's no changes there's no

00:53:46.700 flexibility it is what it is and i have to work my life around everything else so my goal would be to

00:53:51.880 get to a point where it even if i had a job that say i counseled and went to a building and had

00:53:58.740 clients i would be working that around so like getting a degree and like my thing would be like

00:54:07.640 going and getting a social work degree there's nothing wrong with that but look more as how can

00:54:12.560 i make it a business how can i make it a contract how can i be an entrepreneur and that's just my

00:54:18.680 personal belief because that way you can work it around your family and for me it's how can i

00:54:24.160 prioritize my family um and work that into it and so that's what i teach my kids um and that's the

00:54:31.700 exit plan is just trying to get there because i went the wrong way first so it's just better to start

00:54:38.120 with that mindset yeah we're all on different paths for sure well thank you ladies for joining us

00:54:44.840 any closing thoughts anything that you'd like people to take away that you haven't been able to say

00:54:50.300 yet doris do you have any thoughts well i think um i i i i line up with how pamela's thinking because

00:55:04.180 if you can create a work situation um around your family life whether you work from home which is

00:55:13.320 probably the most ideal situation um and uh if you're in a situation where you're currently working

00:55:22.680 a day job two three days a week is there a way to take your skill set and bring it home or change your

00:55:35.540 hours so you can work like i don't know maybe two to eight if that works with

00:55:42.220 your husband to be home or somebody to be home grandma or something during that time

00:55:48.940 um it it takes a while to sort of rethink how to work um in a new way so that you can homeschool

00:56:00.240 um i mean the the most ideal situation is you don't have to work and you can be home

00:56:08.000 but uh if we're not working we may be volunteering so again that's taking two four hours of our day or

00:56:16.680 week away and those are all good things too another thing is um can your children be part of your work

00:56:26.940 and so one of our other businesses i had to do all the invoicing

00:56:31.140 and uh back then we didn't do email invoicing we did um printing it out and we had to fold them and

00:56:40.100 lick the envelope put the stamp on and so the kids gathered around me at the table and we did it

00:56:46.560 together for 45 minutes we were done um that's another way to sort of bring kids into the work

00:56:54.820 um there's just a lot of things to consider but i think the sooner you rethink about how you're going

00:57:03.320 to work and have sort of a plan to work towards like pamela's got this goal in her in her life 1.00

00:57:09.660 i think and i'm talking about jobs that are outside of the home not the ones that are at home

00:57:14.620 i think that would really um help with having more time to be at home present with the homeschooling

00:57:23.020 um yeah that's really good good thoughts jillian what about you um i guess an addendum to that is

00:57:32.340 that there may be moms watching um this who are by necessity have to work outside the home and they 1.00

00:57:40.480 say we want to homeschool but we just can't because i've got to work well what the other lady said is

00:57:46.920 um is correct there's other ways to do it you you can be inventive and flexible so you don't do it

00:57:58.100 in in the morning like we've chosen to do it works for our schedule so you take a morning shift

00:58:05.340 and you homeschool in the afternoon or vice versa like there's there's ways to do it

00:58:13.220 if you are convicted that you need to homeschool and homeschooling is the the benefits to your

00:58:20.700 family life um the investment in your children is well worth it but you're going to have to be a bit

00:58:29.100 inventive and how you um how you go forward and i would encourage people to think about it prayerfully

00:58:35.720 and um yeah just shift your paradigm shift your thinking a little bit um it doesn't have to be

00:58:43.640 like in a brick and mortar school from eight till three in fact um i think uh pamela said if the kids

00:58:52.520 sit down and they really get to it they can have their schoolwork done in an hour my kids too even the

00:58:58.580 high school student if he really puts the afterburners on he can be done in an hour and a half

00:59:03.340 doesn't always do that but if he did he can be finished and so homeschooling you have to shift

00:59:11.600 your mind it's not like public school it's very different but very rewarding that's so good yeah

00:59:19.540 how about you pamela well i think um i'm assuming if they're if you guys are here it's because the

00:59:26.040 busy mom means probably you are very busy likely with a job or something so i very much agree like

00:59:33.220 get creative like there are ways you can fit it in um the monday to friday job is the least ideal

00:59:40.540 where you're working during the day because those are the best times to connect like even if it's

00:59:45.640 just small but sometimes that it's what you have to work with you have to so the first thing is try

00:59:52.640 and get creative see if there's something that you can do to create the shift work or maybe you can

00:59:57.300 change things in your life to reduce it by a day um whatever works for your family that doesn't

01:00:05.180 always work so there's other things you can do um but i also very much strongly build a community

01:00:11.780 whether that's grandparents um so like we live in a multi-generational setting my parents live

01:00:19.240 on the same home set at us and so we actually rely quite a bit on my parents and my kids are in and

01:00:25.760 out of their home um i know that's a unique situation but there are still lots of people

01:00:29.780 who have moms or dads or in-laws that would love to help out and and assist with the family and

01:00:37.380 teaching and so use those maybe it's not family or it could be like aunties uncles um but you can

01:00:46.640 also have friends or it can be other homeschool families working moms who want to teach their kids

01:00:53.060 can come together to create well this day i'm actually off so you can take turns and alternate

01:00:59.040 and work with other homeschool families and that's that kind of getting creative thing but community

01:01:04.660 is such a huge thing and the more community you build the stronger bonds are and the more strength and

01:01:10.700 and that connection and teaching people like how relationships are so important and i guess the last

01:01:16.700 thing i would say is with homeschooling we ebb and flow and where um i i can say like this year it's

01:01:25.800 only it's october and for the most part we have been faithful to our schedule i have had years that

01:01:32.380 have been total and utter disasters i call them and we didn't do anything for an entire month for

01:01:38.740 example and i'm like oh my gosh my kids i'm failing them right like it's the typical self-talk of

01:01:45.320 doubt and i think that everything's going like just haywire but ultimately it's not about the day

01:01:53.520 or the week or the month it's about what you've done in the year and so because homeschool is so

01:01:58.880 unique that you can actually put through so much in such a short time we may have failed miserably and

01:02:05.780 in january there was one year we didn't do anything january but february opened up and it was we just

01:02:12.220 you know we got down to it and they did lots that month um and so there are times that you do more

01:02:20.500 and there are times you do less so don't look at it in like the little times look at it in the broader

01:02:25.200 times and then also focus on quality it's about quality not quantity it's better that they they

01:02:31.420 learn and understand than to do what i call is that a lot of curriculum has fluff skip the fluff you

01:02:37.100 don't need the fluff if they understand it they get the concept you move on with your life and you

01:02:41.440 carry on they don't need to do everything so that's that kind of just pick the the important stuff um do

01:02:48.040 what you need to do and love your child raise them um give them the faith give them um the quality time

01:02:57.100 because the studies also show that what actually makes children successful is that one-on-one teaching

01:03:03.460 and so if you can provide that in an hour in a day they're getting just as much um as a kid that

01:03:12.700 went to school for six to eight hours yeah absolutely wow there's just been so much wisdom

01:03:18.940 here and so many good ideas and things to chew on here i hope that you're taking away some good nuggets

01:03:23.660 and thank you so much for joining us thank you to our guests it's been a pleasure it's been so good to

01:03:29.400 hear your perspectives and i hope that everybody has a good day i'm just going to turn it over to

01:03:34.040 doris here for our closing comments yeah thank you laurie and uh to our guests here um this morning

01:03:40.940 i just wanted to say um in two weeks on october 20 you know november 12th sorry um we have got jason

01:03:51.040 weaning back he's going to be talking about budgeting which will actually be a nice way to continue this

01:03:56.760 conversation because in in parts of our conversation now you know money is is a big deal in our lives

01:04:03.120 and providing and paying our bills and and whether to work or not to work and so jason's gonna talk to

01:04:09.940 us about uh budgeting he spoke to us uh on october 8 um on dad's role in the home school he's got 10 kids

01:04:19.360 so he's got a few things to say on uh on all these dynamics so again thank you for being with us

01:04:27.040 and um we'll see you again on november 12th bye-bye everyone

01:04:31.300 you

Action4Canada - October 25, 2024

How to Juggle Work Dynamics, Homeschooling, and Parenting for Busy Moms

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