Alex Jones Show - Alex Jones Global Love Cop

00:00:00.000 We're global love cops, though.

00:00:02.000 We appreciate you letting us have our...

00:00:04.000 You had to rebut with Alex Jones and Jeff Davis.

00:00:06.000 Some air time so we can tell everyone how we're...

00:00:10.000 That's right.

00:00:10.000 For the children.

00:00:12.000 We're glad to be here.

00:00:13.000 We don't agree with Alex Jones and Jeff Davis and Bo.

00:00:16.000 Yes.

00:00:17.000 We like big government.

00:00:19.000 We like multi-genistical task forces.

00:00:21.000 We like it.

00:00:23.000 We're loving global love cops.

00:00:26.000 That's right.

00:00:27.000 We want people to disagree.

00:00:28.000 That's good.

00:00:29.000 So what are your names?

00:00:31.000 Your special agent?

00:00:32.000 I am a multi-jurisdictional task force.

00:00:36.000 Don't mind the ski mask.

00:00:37.000 I'm here to protect you and your property.

00:00:40.000 Yes.

00:00:40.000 Except when I decided to seize it without due process.

00:00:43.000 Yes.

00:00:43.000 But that's it forfeiture seizure.

00:00:45.000 We're so loving.

00:00:47.000 My name is Harold.

00:00:49.000 And my name is William.

00:00:52.000 My name is Harold.

00:00:53.000 Harold and William.

00:00:54.000 Yes.

00:00:55.000 And we're global.

00:00:59.000 We love cops.

00:01:01.000 We love the media says we're good.

00:01:04.000 We are.

00:01:05.000 The media likes us too.

00:01:07.000 The media loves us.

00:01:11.000 The media, the loving media.

00:01:13.000 They're our friends, you know.

00:01:17.000 Don't listen to Bo.

00:01:18.000 I agree with those callers earlier that have no thoughts to think that the government training centers have indoctrinated.

00:01:24.000 Oh, what understanding young youth.

00:01:27.000 They're like, what did Mr. Rockefeller, our boss, say?

00:01:30.000 Yes, our boss once said that government training centers were helpless people yielding themselves to our molding heads.

00:01:40.000 We're the molding hens.

00:01:42.000 Sometimes we gotta use forest, but it's for their best danger.

00:01:45.000 And that's why we support bills like HR 1956 that allow further...

00:01:51.000 That's that forfeiture law.

00:01:53.000 If a neighbor doesn't give you up, we get to get their property too.

00:02:02.000 Everyone prattling on each other.

00:02:05.000 I think we got some footage of your friends at work.

00:02:09.000 This is Bill and Sam.

00:02:12.000 We can bring that up.

00:02:14.000 Let's show what our friends are doing.

00:02:16.000 Let's show the love.

00:02:19.000 Do you want to hear from You want to take some calls?

00:02:22.000 Oh, yes!

00:02:23.000 Yeah, we can take calls, but we can also see the footage of our friends.

00:02:28.000 Yeah, that's on blue.

00:02:30.000 And their love actions.

00:02:33.000 All right.

00:02:33.000 I like it!

00:02:35.000 Well, while they bring that up...

00:02:36.000 I love it!

00:02:39.000 Oh, yes!

00:02:41.000 Yes, the Goon Mechanics! 0.99

00:02:44.000 We like what they've done!

00:02:45.000 Oh, we love dumbbells!

00:02:47.000 Oh, we love them!

00:02:49.000 Oh, we love what the government's done to you!

00:02:54.000 We love them!

00:02:56.000 They'll never stand up for private property!

00:03:08.000 They're too busy!

00:03:11.000 We love you!

00:03:16.000 We love you!

00:03:20.000 Well, let's take another call.

00:03:22.000 Let's try to find someone serious.

00:03:25.000 To seriously come up with the logical arguments against this kind of behavior.

00:03:29.000 We love police states!

00:03:31.000 We love no innocent until proven guilty!

00:03:35.000 No innocent until proven guilty!

00:03:36.000 We love smashing through doors.

00:03:38.000 Yes, caller?

00:03:39.000 Uh, I just want to know one thing.

00:03:41.000 What the hell kind of drug are you guys on, you stupid asses?

00:03:43.000 Oh, here's another thing we love!

00:03:46.000 I like you!

00:03:48.000 Here's another loving you! 0.71

00:03:50.000 Here's another one that we love.

00:03:53.000 He loves us too.

00:03:56.000 Oh, we love you too.

00:04:00.000 Oh, we love that attitude.

00:04:02.000 You'll get nothing done that way.

00:04:05.000 Don't listen to Bo.

00:04:06.000 You're playing right into their head.

00:04:08.000 We love it.

00:04:11.000 Caller, anything serious?

00:04:13.000 Hello?

00:04:14.000 Hello?

00:04:15.000 I just want to say, y'all are some fucking dickheads.

00:04:22.000 Boy, I tell you, I tell you, the government training center sure got healed.

00:04:29.000 So far, just handfuls of love and slavery.

00:04:33.000 We love you.

00:04:35.000 You know, they can't have a single cognitive thought in their little minds.

00:04:39.000 Oh, it's just scary.

00:04:42.000 They can't even wipe their own noses. 0.88

00:04:45.000 No, just watch the media and they'll tell you how we're loving.

00:04:53.000 What?

00:04:53.000 Anarchy!

00:04:56.000 Anarchy, does that, uh...

00:04:57.000 Oh, we don't agree with that!

00:04:58.000 We like the bankers running things.

00:05:01.000 Yeah, we like managed economy.

00:05:03.000 We like command and control economy.

00:05:06.000 You need order.

00:05:06.000 You definitely need order for that.

00:05:08.000 We need lots of order.

00:05:10.000 We're the maintainers of that order.

00:05:12.000 I said, "Fuck you, Bippie!" Oh! 1.00

00:05:16.000 Another government training Saturday.

00:05:19.000 Oh! We've jumped you!

00:05:21.000 Oh, we've done such a good job!

00:05:23.000 Not us, our bosses.

00:05:25.000 You know, Mr. Rockefeller.

00:05:27.000 Yes, our bosses.

00:05:29.000 They've done a wonderful job in the great government training set.

00:05:32.000 It all goes back to him, huh?

00:05:35.000 The big guy.

00:05:36.000 Hello!

00:05:38.000 You're live with the MJTF, the Global Love Cop.

00:05:43.000 Yes, the Ministry of Love, the Global Occupation Peace Forces.

00:05:48.000 The only thing standing in our way is property rights and the Second Amendment, and soon those will be liquidated in the good of the people.

00:05:57.000 We're going to take good care of you and provide space and safety.

00:06:01.000 Peace and security.

00:06:03.000 Yes.

00:06:04.000 What do you think, caller?

00:06:04.000 Do we need guns still?

00:06:07.000 Yeah, I think we need guns.

00:06:08.000 I think we need...

00:06:09.000 No!

00:06:10.000 Only we!

00:06:11.000 Only we need the guns!

00:06:16.000 What do you need guns for?

00:06:18.000 What do you need guns for?

00:06:19.000 We'll take care of you.

00:06:21.000 What do you need an Uzi for?

00:06:23.000 Don't mind the ski mask, caller.

00:06:25.000 Why do you need guns?

00:06:26.000 These are to keep you safe.

00:06:28.000 What we need more than anything is God.

00:06:30.000 We'll protect you, though.

00:06:32.000 Yes.

00:06:33.000 Why would you worry about God and guns when you've got the global love cops?

00:06:38.000 That's right.

00:06:39.000 The global love cops are here to help.

00:06:42.000 Yes.

00:06:43.000 All right.

00:06:43.000 Thanks, caller.

00:06:44.000 Okay.

00:06:46.000 Caller, what you got?

00:06:47.000 They are a bunch of pussies, man. 1.00

00:06:50.000 Oh, another elect from the government training.

00:06:53.000 Oh, I'm so glad we're doing such a fine job.

00:06:56.000 Yes, another loving one.

00:07:00.000 Yes, loving, loving, love, loving, love, love, love, love, love, love.

00:07:08.000 That's our middle name, love.

00:07:11.000 That's our middle name.

00:07:12.000 Again, don't mind the ski mask.

00:07:15.000 That's because...

00:07:16.000 Hello?

00:07:17.000 Yes?

00:07:19.000 I'm just wondering.

00:07:20.000 I'm watching the show now, and you SWAT team fellas seem to be hiding there, not showing your faces.

00:07:27.000 If you're representing our best interests in the government...

00:07:32.000 How come you SWAT team guys are always got a mask on of some kind?

00:07:36.000 Well, that's for your best interest!

00:07:38.000 Yes!

00:07:38.000 That's your best interest!

00:07:40.000 That way we can steal people's property and no one knows who's it is!

00:07:44.000 That's right!

00:07:44.000 Asset, forfeiture, seizure!

00:07:46.000 No innocent until proven guilty!

00:07:48.000 No drug!

00:07:49.000 We can't have people telling on us!

00:07:50.000 See, we work for the global loving people and we have to get extra pay to be doing what we're doing so we get to be thugs!

00:07:58.000 I'm just wondering, if you're as illustrious and loving, why SWAT team guys are always hiding behind a mask and trying to intimidate the public?

00:08:10.000 Well, now, wait a minute, Colin.

00:08:12.000 You're obviously not very well indoctrinated in the government schooling centers.

00:08:16.000 That's right!

00:08:17.000 You need to go back there and learn some more!

00:08:20.000 You need to learn a little bit more!

00:08:23.000 My mission is not...

00:08:26.000 To question why my mission is to do or die?

00:08:30.000 No, you need to go back.

00:08:31.000 You need more further training.

00:08:33.000 That's right.

00:08:34.000 You need to become an understanding, compassionate member of the society.

00:08:40.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute.

00:08:42.000 He didn't watch his cowboys this week.

00:08:44.000 You obviously need to be further indoctrinated.

00:08:46.000 He didn't watch his cowboys this week.

00:08:49.000 Well, you know what I heard today?

00:08:50.000 I heard that Rockefeller donated the property to the United Nations.

00:08:56.000 Wait, wait, wait!

00:08:57.000 Wait, wasn't that so nice of him?

00:09:00.000 Yes, he donated it.

00:09:02.000 Wait a minute, caller.

00:09:03.000 That was out of his graciousness of his heart that he did that.

00:09:08.000 See, the U.N., it's just for peace.

00:09:11.000 Well, he's a multimillion, trillionaire, whatever, and here he's given the property to the United Nations?

00:09:16.000 But it's for peace.

00:09:17.000 He's interested in peace.

00:09:18.000 Just like Ted Turner gave that billion dollars of Taiwan stock.

00:09:22.000 It's only for peace.

00:09:23.000 The U.N. is for the little people. 1.00

00:09:26.000 Yeah.

00:09:27.000 And we're here to make sure the little people get what they deserve. 1.00

00:09:32.000 Caller, I bet you're a domestic terrorist.

00:09:34.000 We probably need to deal with you.

00:09:36.000 Yes, you don't ask.

00:09:37.000 Well, I'm not going to give you my name, but somebody said I was a rabid follower of this guy, Alex Jones, who I think has a good show on it.

00:09:44.000 I bet that you're a domestic terrorist.

00:09:46.000 Let's talk about that Alex and Jeff Davis.

00:09:49.000 They're terrible people.

00:09:51.000 Don't listen to anything they say.

00:09:54.000 Just because they don't wear ski masks, that means they're bad.

00:09:57.000 If you wear ski masks and German war helmets, then you're good. 0.98

00:10:02.000 Tell me why the UN wears helmets that look like Nazi helmets.

00:10:05.000 Explain that to me.

00:10:06.000 Well, it's a better design.

00:10:09.000 We did finance Hitler, but he got a little out of control. 0.96

00:10:15.000 Well, just basically don't ask questions.

00:10:17.000 You're not supposed to ask questions.

00:10:19.000 This is a new world order, caller.

00:10:21.000 You don't ask questions like that to question anything, you know.

00:10:25.000 That's right, caller.

00:10:26.000 You're just supposed to just sit back and watch the love flow.

00:10:30.000 What's the stated reason for your masks?

00:10:35.000 Well, we do things that aren't hard.

00:10:38.000 It's a hard job, but somebody's got to...

00:10:41.000 Well, we read in the paper just this week that that big truck with a ton of cocaine just...

00:10:46.000 The Border Patrol brought up the DEA, and then the DEA just disappeared.

00:10:51.000 See?

00:10:52.000 See?

00:10:53.000 Well...

00:10:54.000 Well...

00:10:55.000 We might make people mad, see?

00:10:57.000 Right, they might know who you are.

00:10:58.000 Yes, and we can't have that.

00:11:00.000 Not in the global love sense.

00:11:02.000 That's right.

00:11:03.000 They might attack you unfairly.

00:11:04.000 See, we're all about love.

00:11:08.000 We're all about love.

00:11:10.000 You submit to us and it's all about love.

00:11:15.000 You know what?

00:11:15.000 I think you're trying to fool us with this love bit.

00:11:18.000 This loving stuff.

00:11:19.000 I'm...

00:11:20.000 Boy, I'm really getting mad at you, Cole.

00:11:22.000 You're not obviously...

00:11:23.000 In fact, what's your address?

00:11:25.000 I'm not going to let you know.

00:11:27.000 You know, that Alex Jones is right.

00:11:29.000 You guys, you SWAT team guys.

00:11:31.000 You know what?

00:11:32.000 You look like a couple of Gestapo agents.

00:11:34.000 No!

00:11:36.000 No, we...

00:11:36.000 Wait a minute.

00:11:37.000 Now, this guy, you're a domestic terrorist.

00:11:40.000 That's right.

00:11:41.000 You're questioning things.

00:11:43.000 You're dangerous.

00:11:44.000 You're dangerous to society.

00:11:46.000 That sounded like verbal assault.

00:11:48.000 Yeah.

00:11:48.000 Were they assaulting?

00:11:50.000 That's hate speech.

00:11:51.000 Yeah, hate speech.

00:11:52.000 That's hate speech.

00:11:53.000 Bill Clinton's going to save us from you.

00:11:55.000 You know, I saw a movie last night.

00:11:56.000 It was called Test Tube Teens in the year 2030. And something to do with how the federal government, the U.S. government, is so deep in debt to foreign nations that the foreign nations have a chance of foreclosing against the United States.

00:12:13.000 And therefore taking over control of the United States through the foreign banks like that. 0.99

00:12:17.000 Oh, don't worry about that.

00:12:20.000 Don't try to hide that either, Gustavo.

00:12:21.000 Hey, hey, call her.

00:12:22.000 Call her.

00:12:23.000 Why don't you be interested in the cowboys or the longhorns?

00:12:26.000 Yes!

00:12:27.000 Hey, how about them cowboys?

00:12:29.000 No, I don't have time for football and sports.

00:12:32.000 I don't want to be a slave.

00:12:33.000 You need to do some more.

00:12:35.000 You need to go back to school.

00:12:36.000 Where are you going, right-wing Bo?

00:12:39.000 Do I have to tell you where I'm going, everyone?

00:12:41.000 Yes!

00:12:42.000 Where are you going?

00:12:43.000 I'm not going to tell you.

00:12:45.000 I'm going to be out looking for black helicopters because I know they're there.

00:12:49.000 Sorry.

00:12:50.000 Sorry, officer.

00:12:51.000 Do you have your transmitter?

00:12:54.000 Yeah.

00:12:55.000 I got it implanted yesterday.

00:12:59.000 Hold on there.

00:13:00.000 You don't seem to want to play the farm.

00:13:03.000 Yes.

00:13:04.000 How come you guys, you SWAT team guys, when somebody's driver's license is expired?

00:13:11.000 You guys get about 50 SWAT team guys, and you come break into somebody's house.

00:13:15.000 Yes, as part of the love!

00:13:17.000 Bunch of bullies.

00:13:18.000 No!

00:13:19.000 In fact, whenever we can, we're going to show you some footage of some of our friends.

00:13:23.000 You need to be indoctrinated again, caller.

00:13:26.000 We're going to show you some pictures of friends of ours out engaging in loving behavior.

00:13:31.000 Yes!

00:13:33.000 All right, well, I'll call back later.

00:13:35.000 I've got to do something right now, but you can stop those guys.

00:13:38.000 What are you going to do?

00:13:40.000 I'm not telling you.

00:13:41.000 You'll be watching over me.

00:13:43.000 We need to know what all of our children are doing.

00:13:50.000 They belong to us and our bosses.

00:13:52.000 We need to know what all of our children are doing.

00:13:53.000 And by the way, I haven't seen Jeff Davis and Alex lately.

00:13:56.000 What'd you do with them?

00:13:57.000 You better not have done anything.

00:13:58.000 Oh, they're gone.

00:14:01.000 They're not here in Austin now.

00:14:04.000 Oh, you took them for a ride, I suppose.

00:14:06.000 We're busy loving them.

00:14:08.000 Yeah.

00:14:10.000 Alright.

00:14:11.000 You're loving them.

00:14:13.000 Alright.

00:14:14.000 You need further indoctrination, Colin.

00:14:16.000 You're very right-wing.

00:14:17.000 You're right-wing-er.

00:14:18.000 He's not a liberal-loving person like that.

00:14:21.000 No, you don't love globalism like you should.

00:14:24.000 You don't love loss of sovereignty and dehumanization.

00:14:27.000 You need to learn globalism.

00:14:30.000 That's right.

00:14:31.000 And how we're global love cars.

00:14:36.000 Hello, caller.

00:14:38.000 Alex.

00:14:39.000 Do you think that this kind of action on your part, this sarcasm and everything, brings any credibility to your viewpoints that you're trying to portray?

00:14:48.000 Who are we talking about?

00:14:50.000 I agree with your message and everything, but sometimes bringing it in the form of comedy or spoof like you do detracts from the credibility.

00:15:01.000 My name is William Swat Jefferson.

00:15:06.000 I work for the Rockefellers.

00:15:08.000 That Alex Jones needs to be silent.

00:15:11.000 Yes.

00:15:13.000 Are you questioning us?

00:15:15.000 That is hate speech.

00:15:17.000 I question all authority.

00:15:19.000 That is hate speech.

00:15:20.000 In fact, I want to do a trace on his line so we can have him terminated immediately.

00:15:25.000 I mean, loved immediately.

00:15:28.000 I'll tell you who this is.

00:15:29.000 This is the preacher man.

00:15:31.000 Talked with you before.

00:15:32.000 You're definitely a right-wing extremist.

00:15:35.000 Are you for personal freedom?

00:15:36.000 Personal freedom.

00:15:38.000 You know, an earth-first-er told me out here the other day that the middle class is the problem, and I agree with him. 1.00

00:15:46.000 Well, let me turn it around back on you then, caller.

00:15:52.000 If this hurts his creditability, then why isn't it hurting the real people that wear these things under the guise of law enforcement?

00:16:03.000 And it presented to us on the nightly news every day.

00:16:05.000 Why can't they wear sweat masks?

00:16:07.000 Why can't they wear all these masks?

00:16:09.000 How can they wear German masks? 0.94

00:16:12.000 Why is their credibility not being challenged?

00:16:15.000 Well, it's willful ignorance on the part of the people.

00:16:18.000 Okay.

00:16:18.000 You know that as well as I do.

00:16:20.000 People, you know, it's the easiest course is just to let someone else do your thinking for you.

00:16:27.000 To submit, right.

00:16:29.000 I want to ask you a caller.

00:16:31.000 I want to ask a caller a question.

00:16:33.000 Why are you attempting to hurt the children?

00:16:35.000 Asking questions only hurts the children.

00:16:39.000 Yes.

00:16:39.000 If you would just cram another cheeseburger in your mouth and watch another football game and pay more taxes.

00:16:46.000 And give up your guns.

00:16:47.000 Give up your private property.

00:16:48.000 Give up your property to the UN and to the EPA and to the...

00:16:52.000 Everything will be fine.

00:16:55.000 Everything will be fine.

00:16:57.000 And we will ensure that it will get done if you don't want to participate.

00:17:04.000 This is...

00:17:05.000 I don't understand the crux of your question.

00:17:09.000 I mean, you're playing off on this spoof.

00:17:14.000 You're not loving.

00:17:15.000 I'm not going to talk to you anymore.

00:17:17.000 You're attacking his credibility.

00:17:20.000 You're attacking globalism.

00:17:22.000 We don't appreciate that, right-winger.

00:17:24.000 Why isn't the real ministers of hate, creditability, being attacked?

00:17:30.000 You know, we're wearing this tonight to illustrate that the SWAT teams are expanding.

00:17:35.000 They're wearing masks.

00:17:36.000 They got helicopters with infrared.

00:17:38.000 They got listening devices.

00:17:39.000 They're not concerned with real criminals.

00:17:41.000 They're concerned with patriots and Americans that have a human heart.

00:17:45.000 So that's why we're illustrating absurdity by being absurd.

00:17:49.000 Yes.

00:17:50.000 But we're still global love cops.

00:17:52.000 Global love cops.

00:17:54.000 Yes.

00:17:54.000 Hello, caller.

00:17:56.000 Yeah.

00:17:57.000 I think we should keep legalized guns.

00:18:01.000 What's that?

00:18:03.000 Uh, fuck you.

00:18:04.000 Oh, another government training center candidate.

00:18:07.000 Boy, we've done a great job on that.

00:18:09.000 Oh, yes.

00:18:10.000 Tell me, how do we do such a good job on them?

00:18:13.000 Well, you've got the media working.

00:18:15.000 They love us.

00:18:17.000 And the government training centers brainwashing the kids about the UN. You've got lots of different factions going on.

00:18:24.000 And it's just so, so loving.

00:18:27.000 How could you not want to fall into this system of globalism?

00:18:32.000 And it's so easy to get them to be petty and small-minded and never have an original thought.

00:18:37.000 Oh yes, you got the cowboys and you got the longhorns and you got...

00:18:41.000 Hollywood and the Grammys and all of the love stuff.

00:18:46.000 Oh, did you see our UN extravaganza this week about for the children on TV? Oh, yes, the UNICEF is going to take good care of the children, don't you know?

00:18:55.000 Don't worry about us enforcing it.

00:18:57.000 We're here to make sure bad people don't hurt you.

00:19:00.000 Yes.

00:19:01.000 Here, let's talk to another caller.

00:19:03.000 Do you want to hear that?

00:19:03.000 Yes.

00:19:04.000 Hello.

00:19:05.000 Hello.

00:19:07.000 Are you guys kind of finding a losing battle here?

00:19:11.000 Oh, another one of them.

00:19:14.000 Another training set.

00:19:16.000 No, we're not fighting a losing battle.

00:19:18.000 We have all of you dumbed down.

00:19:20.000 We have all the money.

00:19:21.000 All the power.

00:19:23.000 And we run all the big banks.

00:19:25.000 And you believe everything.

00:19:26.000 And you attacked a few people that try to give you real information.

00:19:30.000 Because it's easier to just be a loser than actually stand up.

00:19:34.000 We're on the winning team.

00:19:36.000 Yes, we're on the global side.

00:19:38.000 Global.

00:19:39.000 The media loves us.

00:19:41.000 Don't listen to this man every Saturday night.

00:19:44.000 Well, you can see why these guys are wearing masks, because people are attacking you, and you have a really tough position in the New World Order.

00:19:51.000 I mean, there's really...

00:19:52.000 We're on the front lines of stealing property for the global.

00:19:56.000 Oh, but there's plenty of our friends that have called tonight.

00:19:59.000 Yes.

00:20:00.000 Yeah.

00:20:02.000 They all work...

00:20:03.000 They don't even know that they work for us.

00:20:04.000 They don't even know.

00:20:05.000 They don't even understand what they're...

00:20:07.000 What's happening?

00:20:08.000 They just think that we're...

00:20:10.000 This is all...

00:20:11.000 We've had many friend calls.

00:20:15.000 We're friendly.

00:20:17.000 Yes, are you financed by Kirk Waldheim Watson?

00:20:20.000 Oh no, he's just a lower, lower, lower level minion.

00:20:24.000 Yes, someday.

00:20:25.000 We manage the big boys.

00:20:27.000 We work for the big boys, like the Rockefellers, and the DuPonts, and the Rothschilds, and all of these loving characters.

00:20:34.000 The World Bank, the IML. Yes.

00:20:36.000 They're all loving.

00:20:37.000 We don't pay any attention to low-level minions.

00:20:41.000 Well, thank you.

00:20:41.000 I respect your word.

00:20:44.000 What did he say?

00:20:45.000 Uh-oh.

00:20:47.000 He's another friend.

00:20:49.000 He respects us.

00:20:51.000 There you go.

00:20:52.000 Another friend of ours.

00:20:54.000 Hello, you're on the air.

00:20:55.000 What's up?

00:20:56.000 I just can't wait to bust down some doors and no one will stop me and I can steal property even if there's no drugs on the premises.

00:21:04.000 I like it.

00:21:06.000 I love it.

00:21:07.000 I love it.

00:21:07.000 I like it too.

00:21:11.000 Hello, caller.

00:21:12.000 Hello.

00:21:13.000 You know somebody stole my car a couple years ago, and you guys didn't do anything about it We're not supposed to work to be the s for seizing for for a statue They have a specific test caller They have a specific task, and that's acquiring property.

00:21:33.000 We got to go out and steal people's property.

00:21:36.000 In fact, we like the criminals.

00:21:38.000 You justify our existence.

00:21:40.000 That's why we're always letting you out.

00:21:43.000 All the violent criminals we let out, but the non-violent we keep in.

00:21:51.000 Which one's William and which one's Harold?

00:21:54.000 I'm Harold.

00:21:55.000 I'm William.

00:21:58.000 Is that a stormtrooper helmet you're wearing?

00:22:00.000 It's just a new issue helmet worn by all global MJTS forces.

00:22:07.000 Mine's not Baby Blue because I'm not part of the UN. I'm part of the multi-jurisdictional tax force.

00:22:14.000 Yes, I love an organization.

00:22:16.000 Does it prevent you from having a good thought?

00:22:19.000 No, it helps me.

00:22:21.000 No, he's been programmed very well to seize people's properties.

00:22:27.000 How about your baseball cap with the SWAT on?

00:22:29.000 What does that protect you from?

00:22:30.000 Oh, it's just, it lets the people know that we are...

00:22:35.000 We can.

00:22:35.000 Yeah, that we care and that we're going to...

00:22:37.000 We love them.

00:22:38.000 ...pay good care of them.

00:22:39.000 We're here to help.

00:22:40.000 And if you don't submit to our love, then we'll seize your property.

00:22:44.000 So you did steal my car.

00:22:47.000 No, we allowed someone to steal it so that we could justify more police staff.

00:22:53.000 We're fairly new into the mechanism, but it might have been one of our friends.

00:22:57.000 Well, the acronym SWAT, what does that stand for?

00:23:00.000 It means, it's SWAT you like a fly if you don't submit.

00:23:04.000 Well, that doesn't fit in the acronym.

00:23:06.000 Yes, it is the acronym.

00:23:08.000 It means SWAT you like a fly if you don't submit.

00:23:11.000 Let's go to another club.

00:23:13.000 To our global love.

00:23:14.000 Let's go to another one of our friends.

00:23:17.000 Hello.

00:23:18.000 How are you?

00:23:20.000 This is your president.

00:23:21.000 I'm really proud of you.

00:23:23.000 Me and Hillary are watching you tonight.

00:23:26.000 And we just love the job you're performing.

00:23:30.000 We love President Clinton.

00:23:32.000 Thank you, Commander.

00:23:33.000 We care about President Clinton.

00:23:35.000 Thank you, Commander.

00:23:37.000 How about a pay raise, Chief?

00:23:39.000 You know, we've been violating a lot of people here lately.

00:23:43.000 Hey, we only get 10% of whatever we see.

00:23:46.000 Yes, why what, 25% of all see?

00:23:49.000 Mr. President speaking, and I will tell you, Hillary and I have decided.

00:23:52.000 To give you an extra 15% for every gun you pick up.

00:23:56.000 Thank you, Commander-in-Chief!

00:23:59.000 You all have a fire.

00:24:00.000 Hey, let me ask you, Commander, since you're just the number one minion of the transnational banks, what are they planning in the future?

00:24:08.000 Well, I don't know about none of that.

00:24:10.000 Nobody told me anything about any of that.

00:24:14.000 Well...

00:24:14.000 Sir, sir, I heard on TV that you are the most loving, compassionate, caring person that you...

00:24:22.000 But you're here to help us, and I just want to commend you for all the power you've given us with your new terrorism bills. 0.62

00:24:29.000 Yes!

00:24:30.000 Of course, you know now, gentlemen, this is for the children.

00:24:34.000 Yes, now you also need to extend the Brady bill and the, uh...

00:24:38.000 The anti-terrorism bill.

00:24:42.000 What do you think about our idea of testing urine and blood?

00:24:46.000 Yes, we love that idea.

00:24:48.000 We will enforce it for you.

00:24:50.000 It's a privilege to drive a car.

00:24:52.000 We already have you thumb scanning and all these fees.

00:24:56.000 Next is urine and blood testing for your best interest.

00:25:00.000 The next thing we have for you to do is to push the new preacher.

00:25:06.000 For the world that we're going to come up with.

00:25:09.000 Well, see, caller, you must give up your private property because it's hurting the birdies and the bees, and it's hurting salamanders.

00:25:19.000 We care about salamanders.

00:25:21.000 Mr. Clinton, you're doing such a wonderful job.

00:25:24.000 Keep pushing for gun legislation, will you?

00:25:27.000 Please?

00:25:27.000 I'm getting, sometimes I get tired of being shot at by people defending their property.

00:25:32.000 We need to move towards further gun legislation, Mr. Commander.

00:25:40.000 Well, we can always furnish you with lots of C2 gas and matches.

00:25:47.000 Let's ask!

00:25:48.000 I appreciate your call.

00:25:50.000 Let's ask this right-winger extremist what he thinks.

00:25:53.000 Do you agree with us yet?

00:25:55.000 Uh, no.

00:25:57.000 I disagree on several points.

00:25:58.000 What do you disagree with, extremist?

00:26:02.000 Well, I guess I am an extremist, but yeah, you would have to remove the mask if you were to operate in the correct way.

00:26:07.000 Oh, no.

00:26:08.000 We can't do that.

00:26:10.000 This is a new global world order.

00:26:13.000 So, but...

00:26:14.000 So none of your friends, they don't ever get out of control and do something that might be illegal or incorrect?

00:26:21.000 Illegal?

00:26:21.000 The law's on our side!

00:26:23.000 Yes!

00:26:24.000 That's what our commander-in-chief had just called to tell us, to thank us for how we're enforcing his laws.

00:26:31.000 In fact, those that would say death to the New World Order!

00:26:33.000 We think that's a terrible thing.

00:26:35.000 We love global tyranny.

00:26:37.000 We love gun control. 0.63

00:26:38.000 We love the raping of the third world. 1.00

00:26:40.000 Hoarding laws.

00:26:41.000 Yes, food is dangerous and it's freezing.

00:26:43.000 Yes, we love hoarding laws.

00:26:45.000 Well, I'm for a new world order.

00:26:48.000 I'm for a world order.

00:26:50.000 Yeah, well then you're a good, you're a brandable.

00:26:52.000 But I'm for a brand new world order.

00:26:54.000 So you guys would have to get fired.

00:26:57.000 Yeah.

00:26:58.000 No more ski mask.

00:27:00.000 No more accountability.

00:27:02.000 No, we're going to have to have markings on your helicopters.

00:27:05.000 We're going to have to take the mask off.

00:27:07.000 You're going to have your names on your uniforms.

00:27:08.000 Oh, I don't know whether I like this ho. 1.00

00:27:10.000 No, I don't like it.

00:27:11.000 I don't like this ho. 1.00

00:27:12.000 He wants to hurt you.

00:27:13.000 Yeah.

00:27:14.000 Hello, you're on the air.

00:27:16.000 You know, I tell you, there's a lot of dangerous people in this country, but we're going to keep you safe.

00:27:22.000 Well, you know what I was going to ask you the other day?

00:27:24.000 You know, you always bring up that, uh, that, uh, Reichstag, uh, bombing and, uh, and all that.

00:27:31.000 Did they think about it all happening on April 19th?

00:27:35.000 I don't think they did.

00:27:36.000 It's all...

00:27:37.000 You know, with that mask on, I'm not sure I'm talking to Alex Jones.

00:27:41.000 Oh, yeah.

00:27:42.000 Well, don't worry about us covering up our identity.

00:27:45.000 You know, we're multi-jurisdictional task force.

00:27:48.000 And we're top secret, but, you know...

00:27:51.000 You know, with that mask on, I'm not sure I'm talking to Alex Jones.

00:27:54.000 Oh, yeah.

00:27:55.000 Well, don't worry about us covering up our identity.

00:27:58.000 You know, we're multi-jurisdictional task force.

00:28:01.000 And we're top secret, but, you know, it's to help the children.

00:28:06.000 Well, of course it is.

00:28:07.000 Hey, man, keep up the good work, and all you listeners out there, if you just turn to this, you're kind of freaked out about it.

Alex Jones Show - January 01, 1996

Alex Jones Global Love Cop

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