DIVORCED FOR BEING DIVORCED ｜｜ MUFTI MENK
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
166.02946
Summary
Jummah Kutbahaykah on divorced sisters and how they are treated within the ummah. Why is it that those who are divorced are looked down upon? What does it mean to be a divorced sister in the modern era?
Transcript
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This topic, finally, I think we've got some time for this, inshallah.
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It was a topic that I wanted to discuss today anyway, but I received a message from a sister.
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And she said, obviously, she was getting to know this brother for marriage.
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Everything was going well until the family found out that she is a divorced sister.
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Now, this is a big, big problem within the ummah.
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Sisters who are divorced are being looked down upon, like, I'm not even going to mention anything, in a very disgusting way.
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And they're human beings, and we get these messages, and the sister's saying, what am I supposed to do?
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I got married, it didn't work out, khadr of Allah.
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Just because I'm divorced, they actually, they said, look, we don't want to know you.
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They totally cut off the sister just because she's divorced.
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If you can give us, obviously, answer, inshallah, and give us an example of the time of the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him,
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how the Sahaba married, divorced sisters, et cetera.
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The reason is, I don't need to give you an example of the Prophet Muhammad, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, companions.
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I don't need to give you an example of the companions when I can talk about the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, himself.
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And I hope the families will be listening to this.
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And like I say, we haven't mentioned names, so the benefit will be to thousands of people.
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And before I say this, sometimes when I tweet or when I write something, when I put up a post on Facebook and so on,
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people say, it's like you knew what I was going through.
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And I know what a few people are going through.
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So everyone goes through similar things because we're all human beings.
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You have a house, you eat a few times a day, you go out, you earn, etc, etc.
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Muhammad, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and I'm addressing those who treat divorced women badly,
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or those who look down upon them, or those who don't want to marry them just because they are divorced.
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Number one, the woman he chose, and he agreed to marry, and he had his children with, and he loved, and he continued to say,
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even after she passed away, that you know what, I miss her.
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And he used to be kind to her relatives, even after she passed away, was Khadija bint Khuwaylid radiallahu anha.
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There are narrations that actually make mention of two men, that she was married to one after the other.
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But what's confirmed is, she was not a virgin, so to speak.
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The Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, agreed.
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The Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, agreed.
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Thereafter, all his wives were either widows or divorced.
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The ignorance of these people regarding their own Prophet, the one whom they declare their entry into Islam with,
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They don't even know who is that muhammadan abduhu wa rasuluhu, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
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They haven't even, they probably know he was married to so and so, but they've never paused to think about it.
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May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala make it easy for all those who are divorced to marry again.
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There are some good guys out there, inshaAllah.
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Quite a few of them, I see them here this afternoon, mashallah.
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And the other way as well, if you've had a bad experience, my brothers, it doesn't mean it's the end of the world.
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You can get up and inshaAllah you can get married by the will of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
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Similarly, we make dua that those who are not married at all, you know, you might be thinking you've forgotten us.
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May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala assist you and guide you.
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The point we're raising here is don't judge people.
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Don't think they were bad just because they're divorced.
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And one more thing, when they're divorced, you are bound to hear rumors.
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If you live in the age of WhatsApp, you can imagine what's happening all day and all night.
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People are just saying things and they're just, you know, forwarding anything and everything.
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We actually cause the spreading of gossip just by forwarding messages.
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This is why I said in a few days ago when I was speaking somewhere else that you know what you need to do?
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Delete the message and reply the person to say, please don't send me this type of gossip again.
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But you are bound to hear bad things because everyone wants to prove a point.
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I've seen a few people who are so good that after the divorce, when you ask them what went wrong,
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Wallahi, that man or that woman deserves the mercy of Allah because they are being merciful upon someone else.
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So be careful when you've been through a divorce.
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And I know now it's about 60% of marriages end up in divorce.
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And if you really need to tell someone because you're now getting married again, people say, can I ask you what went wrong?
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You have the right to remain silent and to say, listen, trust me or it's okay.
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The sad reality is things would actually become even worse.