Ali Dawah - May 06, 2024


GIRL BLOWN AWAY BY WOMANS RIGHT IN ISLAM


Episode Stats

Length

24 minutes

Words per Minute

206.25412

Word Count

5,004

Sentence Count

509

Misogynist Sentences

63

Hate Speech Sentences

55


Summary

In this episode, we discuss the importance of the hijab, the role of women in Islam, and the benefits of wearing the hijab. We also talk about how the hijab protects women in the modern world and what it means to be a Muslim.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You probably had boyfriends in your life or somebody who's getting to know?
00:00:02.960 Right now.
00:00:03.600 Not now, not before.
00:00:05.280 Yes.
00:00:05.900 Okay.
00:00:06.520 Your dad will be worried calling.
00:00:08.380 Are you okay?
00:00:09.180 Yeah.
00:00:09.680 Yeah?
00:00:10.080 Yes.
00:00:10.600 Okay, good.
00:00:11.200 He will check up on you?
00:00:12.280 Yes.
00:00:12.900 Why?
00:00:13.440 A woman needs trust.
00:00:15.360 Yes.
00:00:15.780 Security.
00:00:16.440 Yes.
00:00:16.740 Love.
00:00:17.340 Yeah.
00:00:17.640 Thank you.
00:00:18.400 Imagine you come and break it, break it, break it.
00:00:20.800 How are you going to trust the next man that comes?
00:00:22.880 This is how Islam protects women.
00:00:24.400 Number one, speak to the father.
00:00:25.880 Why?
00:00:26.120 Now the man is thinking, speak to the father.
00:00:28.780 I don't want marriage.
00:00:29.560 I just want to mess around.
00:00:30.620 I'm not speaking to your father.
00:00:31.600 Oh, now you know what he's about.
00:00:33.480 Do you see now?
00:00:34.160 Now do you agree?
00:00:35.460 Yeah.
00:00:35.840 Okay, good.
00:00:39.160 As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
00:00:40.640 Dear brothers and sisters, as we watch what is unfolding today in Gaza, we have to understand
00:00:45.880 that opposition is counting on us to lose attention, to become fatigued, and to move on with the
00:00:51.640 new cycle.
00:00:52.420 And just as we can't allow them to dictate our attention, we also can't allow them to dictate
00:00:57.160 the pace of our solidarity.
00:00:58.300 And part of that solidarity is going to be there to rebuild Gaza short-term, long-term.
00:01:04.360 I am proud to give my support, my word of support, to trusted brothers and sisters in
00:01:09.500 the United Kingdom that have started a waqf, that have started an endowment to make sure,
00:01:13.500 inshallah ta'ala, that we're there for the long run.
00:01:15.500 I think maybe about the role of woman in Islam.
00:01:21.880 So, I've seen some wear hijab, some don't, but so, what's like the right thing to do?
00:01:29.520 Perfect.
00:01:29.820 So, the question you're asking is, you've come across Muslims, some of them sisters who
00:01:33.220 wear the hijab, some don't.
00:01:34.460 We say for you to become a Muslim, you have to believe in Allah, his books.
00:01:39.960 Oh, sorry, sorry.
00:01:41.760 It's telling me I'm moving about to him.
00:01:43.460 Sorry.
00:01:44.020 So, you can stay steady.
00:01:45.240 It's just me.
00:01:45.600 I'll keep moving here.
00:01:46.520 So, number one, you believe in God, you believe the Quran is the final message, you believe
00:01:49.700 the Prophet Muhammad is the final prophet, and you have to believe in angels, the books,
00:01:54.680 the Prophet, the Day of Judgment, etc.
00:01:57.820 So, once you accepted that, you're a Muslim.
00:02:00.280 So, for example, if you said, I want to become a Muslim, you can be a Muslim and not wear the
00:02:04.380 hijab.
00:02:05.500 Is it a sin?
00:02:06.480 Yes.
00:02:07.240 However, we say, for example, everyone has their gradual steps of getting closer.
00:02:12.140 All of us have things that we are working on.
00:02:14.100 You get what I'm trying to say?
00:02:15.080 So, to us, you can be a Muslim without wearing the hijab.
00:02:17.580 If that's stopping you, by the way.
00:02:19.100 I'm just saying, if it's stopping you.
00:02:20.280 So, what we say is, though, everyone has their gradual progress.
00:02:22.780 If you say, you know what, I would want to one day, it's totally up to you.
00:02:26.260 But the point of the hijab is why, my dear sister, is because in Islam, Islam sees a woman
00:02:34.320 in a high regard.
00:02:35.840 In the Western world, the Western world has dropped a woman to a sexual object.
00:02:40.620 Islam says, no, a woman has more to offer.
00:02:42.500 The reason why the hijab is worn is so that when a man is talking to you, he's talking
00:02:47.820 to you, not talking to something else.
00:02:49.820 And we, as men, because Islam deals with the reality of the world, we would love it to
00:02:54.100 be everybody holding hands.
00:02:55.980 But that's not the reality.
00:02:57.240 There are evil people that are after evil things.
00:02:59.200 However, the Quran doesn't say, women should cover up because men can't control themselves.
00:03:04.780 This is a big misconception.
00:03:06.120 There is no belief that, oh, you're guilty.
00:03:08.940 We don't have this concept.
00:03:09.900 For example, in Christianity, they believe the reason why the woman have pain in birth
00:03:14.360 is because of what Eve caused Adam to eat from the tree.
00:03:18.000 We don't believe that.
00:03:19.040 We don't believe anybody bears the soul of somebody else.
00:03:21.560 And not only that, in Islam, we believe a woman who's given birth, if she dies, she dies
00:03:25.580 a martyr because of what she's doing.
00:03:28.440 The hijab is there so it protects yourself and the men.
00:03:32.800 A man has to also do his bit.
00:03:34.840 So the hijab is an identity, number one, to show this is a Muslim woman.
00:03:38.500 Yeah?
00:03:38.980 And number two, we live in a society in time with the beauty industry, the opposite gender.
00:03:43.700 A woman, I'm reading a book, I love this book, I always quote it, my friends laugh at me.
00:03:48.420 I said, is this the only book you've read in your life?
00:03:50.220 It's called Beauty Sick.
00:03:51.980 You should buy it.
00:03:53.080 It's from a non-Muslim author.
00:03:54.580 It's called Beauty Sick.
00:03:55.660 And she talks about women who are starving themselves to have the perfect body.
00:04:02.380 Why should you be judged based on your looks?
00:04:05.420 Why should someone judge you based on your body?
00:04:07.880 So that's why Islam has come to protect you and also to protect you against other women.
00:04:13.880 How?
00:04:14.480 Because women tend to look at other women.
00:04:16.740 Oh, she's got this.
00:04:17.560 Oh, look at her.
00:04:18.620 When you are covered up, that is your privacy.
00:04:21.860 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:04:23.020 You are judged based on your intellect.
00:04:26.220 Not, you know, there was a woman, a Brazilian woman.
00:04:30.000 She died because she got bum implants.
00:04:32.680 She got butt implants, excuse me.
00:04:34.860 And she died in the process.
00:04:35.920 There are millions of women around the world who are made to feel ugly, who are made to feel sorry.
00:04:42.500 Islam says, no, you have a soul.
00:04:45.060 You are a human being.
00:04:47.000 You have so much to offer than your looks and your beauty.
00:04:52.020 So Islam says, you should not be judged based on your appearance.
00:04:55.520 So when a woman covers up, when she wears the abaya, when she wears the hijab, etc.
00:05:01.200 Men, obviously you see as well, because men are visual creatures as well.
00:05:04.560 But it's so also that men do not fall in love the wrong way.
00:05:08.080 Because a man can fall in love the wrong way.
00:05:10.540 You know, we are men.
00:05:11.400 Yeah.
00:05:11.660 What happens is they give the woman false promises.
00:05:14.280 They see a woman.
00:05:15.480 They just like her.
00:05:16.200 It's lust.
00:05:16.840 It's not love.
00:05:17.840 So what do they do?
00:05:18.820 They come and abuse that woman.
00:05:21.760 For example, there were studies that showed the amount of women catcalling, sexually harassed.
00:05:26.800 Why can you not walk down the road in peace?
00:05:30.060 Why does men have to come and, oh, whatever, whatever, whatever.
00:05:33.980 So in Islam, Allah tells us in the Quran, it teaches a man that to lower your gaze, to look away.
00:05:40.900 Obviously because I'm talking to you, I'm trying to obviously, I don't want to be rude and be like, you know, here, looking here.
00:05:45.400 But usually in my religion, it teaches me that I should lower my gaze.
00:05:49.680 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:05:50.500 Why?
00:05:51.200 Because Allah is teaching me, do not look at a woman in a sexually objectified way.
00:05:56.360 So that's why as Muslim men, we are told, I was actually standing with one guy there.
00:06:00.520 I was talking to him like this and he turned his back.
00:06:03.100 I said, why did you move?
00:06:04.520 He said, there was someone he saw behind me who was dressed a bit inappropriately.
00:06:09.340 He said, I don't, I just want to, I want to lower my gaze.
00:06:11.720 And I thought, that's such a beautiful thing.
00:06:13.320 If we taught our sons and our men that, listen, don't look at a woman in a sexual objectified way.
00:06:19.140 And by the way, not if she's dressed up in a bikini, even if she's wearing a hijab.
00:06:24.800 Don't look at her in that way.
00:06:27.040 That's number one.
00:06:27.900 Number two, what Islam does is to start, it deals with it in a micro level.
00:06:31.760 We don't believe you have a Ferrari and you have a half-naked woman or you have a chocolate bar.
00:06:37.580 What's a chocolate got to do with a woman?
00:06:39.060 So this is what happens.
00:06:41.640 The Western system has sexually objectified woman.
00:06:44.480 That's why there was a study done in America, in a university.
00:06:47.560 They put these wires in the man's brain, in his head.
00:06:51.200 And they showed him, you know, like screwdriver, different tools.
00:06:55.960 And then they showed the man, the man, woman in bikini.
00:07:00.740 The part of the brain that lights up for tool use.
00:07:04.260 Do you know what that means?
00:07:05.500 He did not see them as human.
00:07:07.300 So when he was looking at these pictures of women in bikini, the part of the brain that lights up for tool use was letar.
00:07:14.360 This is the problem.
00:07:15.680 What we have today is that men abusing women.
00:07:20.080 Dating is the biggest fraud for women.
00:07:23.240 Should I tell you, for example, how I married my wife?
00:07:25.800 Let me tell you.
00:07:26.620 You might want to hear the story.
00:07:27.620 Are you ready for it?
00:07:28.260 Yes.
00:07:28.740 Okay.
00:07:29.780 My wife might be watching this.
00:07:32.120 Check this out.
00:07:32.800 Now, this is what I say when I say Islam on this woman.
00:07:36.340 Every five people that come to Islam, three are women.
00:07:40.460 People say, why?
00:07:41.160 Because it's oppressed, whatever.
00:07:43.220 Check this out.
00:07:44.440 When I met my wife, obviously I got to know her a little bit.
00:07:48.220 I think I spoke to her, the first day I met her, I was talking for about a good five, six hours.
00:07:53.740 It was over, like, on the phone.
00:07:56.660 I was talking.
00:07:57.440 It's okay to get to know her.
00:07:58.460 Now, after that, I had to go and speak to her father.
00:08:02.440 Why?
00:08:03.300 She's smiling.
00:08:04.020 Why is she smiling?
00:08:04.840 Because she knows, yeah, the dad is going to finish you.
00:08:08.760 So, the point is this, sister.
00:08:10.620 I went to the father to say what?
00:08:12.360 I would like your permission to get to know your daughter for marriage.
00:08:17.180 And he says, okay, my son, you have my blessing.
00:08:19.660 He said, thank you for coming to me.
00:08:21.340 Would you not appreciate that?
00:08:22.440 Imagine a man coming and saying,
00:08:24.600 Antia, I am interested in getting to know you for marriage.
00:08:28.220 Because you don't know each other yet.
00:08:29.440 It would be a bit weird if someone said, can I marry you?
00:08:31.320 He said, I don't even know you.
00:08:32.780 Would you not appreciate it?
00:08:34.060 And would your father not appreciate it if a man came and said,
00:08:37.100 Antia, can I speak to your father?
00:08:40.920 I don't know.
00:08:41.580 This is something I don't agree with.
00:08:42.900 Because I feel like I'm making my own decisions.
00:08:45.400 And I don't want...
00:08:46.900 I feel like if someone's asking for my dad's blessing,
00:08:49.860 it means that I'm not important enough that I'm making the decision.
00:08:53.500 But my dad is like superior.
00:08:55.420 Good.
00:08:55.860 So this is a big misconception.
00:08:57.780 This idea, what happens is the following.
00:08:59.720 We think that, for example, me going to your father,
00:09:03.260 it makes you less.
00:09:04.600 You have a decision.
00:09:05.380 In Islam, a woman has a right to say,
00:09:07.760 I would not like to marry him.
00:09:09.800 Full right.
00:09:10.540 A woman has a right to divorce, by the way.
00:09:12.560 You have full right to divorce.
00:09:13.180 What we're saying is the following.
00:09:15.000 A man can...
00:09:16.540 Because this is why they say, for example,
00:09:18.440 why do men lie?
00:09:20.660 Yeah?
00:09:21.100 Okay.
00:09:21.600 Why do men lie?
00:09:22.560 Okay.
00:09:22.900 Because, for example, we are visual creatures.
00:09:24.900 Okay.
00:09:25.860 The reason why women wear makeup and the reason why men lie
00:09:28.560 is because men fall for what they see
00:09:31.360 and women fall for what they hear.
00:09:33.580 Okay.
00:09:34.140 So now what we're saying is a man could have power over you.
00:09:38.180 Easily.
00:09:39.180 He can...
00:09:39.700 Argumentally.
00:09:40.060 You can meet him on the first day.
00:09:41.800 Lovely guy, etc.
00:09:42.640 No harm.
00:09:44.460 He can try to...
00:09:46.380 Whatever.
00:09:47.400 And he has that power over you.
00:09:48.860 You would agree that a man is stronger than a woman.
00:09:51.800 Yes.
00:09:52.360 It's a biological fact.
00:09:53.520 Now, Islam says prevention is better than cure.
00:09:57.080 So Islam says we don't deal with,
00:09:58.660 go, try, let's see, cut it from the roots.
00:10:01.580 Not drink alcohol, then we'll take you to rehab.
00:10:03.880 Go do...
00:10:04.380 No, no, no.
00:10:05.080 Don't go there.
00:10:06.140 Don't watch pornography.
00:10:07.120 Don't do this stuff.
00:10:08.160 So Islam acknowledges reality.
00:10:09.920 Now, in the real world, I agree with you.
00:10:11.660 It should be that he comes and speaks to you.
00:10:14.240 But because Islam knows how Allah has created the woman and the man,
00:10:18.240 Islam sees the man as a threat to you.
00:10:20.500 And it says only a man knows a man.
00:10:22.200 So therefore, let him go speak to your father.
00:10:25.000 It's from that angle.
00:10:26.020 Not from the angle you cannot make your choice.
00:10:27.380 Because in Islam, my wife had the right to say,
00:10:29.900 you know what, father?
00:10:30.500 I don't want to marry him.
00:10:32.000 I don't want to know him.
00:10:33.000 It's there to protect you.
00:10:34.660 Because why?
00:10:35.280 He can say, let's go on a date.
00:10:36.800 Because bear in mind, sister,
00:10:38.960 a woman, women are the gatekeepers of sex.
00:10:41.440 They are the gatekeepers of sex.
00:10:42.620 If they say no, it's a no.
00:10:44.120 So what we're saying is we hear this start of one night stands.
00:10:47.820 And sometimes there's so many factors of sexually transmitted.
00:10:50.420 You know in London, there are one million people that have STDs.
00:10:53.720 One million people, yeah?
00:10:55.600 Now, there's that.
00:10:56.980 There's a factor of him killing you.
00:10:58.260 There was a woman who was kidnapped.
00:10:59.300 I don't know, a couple of years ago.
00:11:01.780 She was kidnapped and killed, yeah?
00:11:03.720 So Islam says these factors are things that are threatening the woman.
00:11:07.060 What are the protocols that we have to protect her?
00:11:09.640 So it's more of a protection and care.
00:11:12.240 So that's the reason when he speaks to the father.
00:11:13.820 Your father, when you go to your father,
00:11:15.960 if you went to your father and said, I have a boyfriend,
00:11:17.500 your father will have a discomfort.
00:11:20.600 And he's smiling.
00:11:21.200 Why?
00:11:21.860 Because a man knows a man.
00:11:23.400 And he's like, okay, is this guy...
00:11:25.280 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
00:11:25.840 I can't help it, man.
00:11:26.860 I can't stand in one place.
00:11:28.040 Okay, I'm going to try my best.
00:11:29.800 Why, sister?
00:11:30.880 Because your father knows himself.
00:11:34.440 He's like, I'm a man.
00:11:35.460 That's what we say to our sisters.
00:11:36.620 Listen, I'm a man.
00:11:37.740 And sometimes when I speak to my wife,
00:11:39.120 she's like, listen, I'm a woman.
00:11:40.000 I know how women think.
00:11:40.760 I'm like, okay, I trust you.
00:11:42.140 So your father knows a man.
00:11:45.800 So if a man goes to your father,
00:11:48.780 he can suss him out.
00:11:49.900 Because otherwise, in your dad's mind,
00:11:52.840 he's worried.
00:11:54.180 Argument's sake,
00:11:54.780 you may have had boyfriends in your life.
00:11:57.780 Probably somebody that you was with.
00:11:59.580 Did you have a...
00:12:00.220 You probably had boyfriends in your life?
00:12:01.600 Or somebody you was getting to know?
00:12:03.140 Right now?
00:12:03.760 No.
00:12:03.920 Not now, not before?
00:12:05.380 Yes.
00:12:06.060 Okay.
00:12:06.820 Your dad would be worried, calling.
00:12:08.500 Are you okay?
00:12:09.360 Yeah.
00:12:09.840 Yeah?
00:12:10.280 Yes.
00:12:10.780 Okay, good.
00:12:11.140 He will check up on you?
00:12:12.460 Yes.
00:12:13.060 Why?
00:12:14.180 To make sure I'm okay and safe and comfortable.
00:12:16.840 Good.
00:12:17.040 Do you think your boyfriend that you had before,
00:12:20.800 do you think the mother is ringing him and saying,
00:12:22.880 hello, are you okay?
00:12:23.480 Is she...
00:12:23.980 Is she...
00:12:24.720 Is she...
00:12:25.220 Why?
00:12:26.100 Because they know he has the power.
00:12:28.420 He's good.
00:12:30.120 But if it's...
00:12:30.700 I have three daughters.
00:12:31.800 I have three daughters.
00:12:32.740 I know the dangers and the threats that face them.
00:12:35.120 If I had a son,
00:12:36.280 oh man,
00:12:37.300 don't come at night.
00:12:38.200 I don't care.
00:12:38.520 Because you have the ability to fight.
00:12:40.200 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:12:40.720 Obviously, there are some women who are MMA fighters.
00:12:43.080 That's exceptions to the rule.
00:12:44.400 The point is what?
00:12:46.060 It's because your dad cares about you.
00:12:47.900 And if your dad had the power,
00:12:49.040 your dad will say what to you?
00:12:50.240 Listen.
00:12:50.900 And for example,
00:12:51.480 let's say you had a bad breakup.
00:12:53.340 Your dad will come and say to you,
00:12:54.260 the next person,
00:12:55.000 let me talk to him.
00:12:56.500 That's protocol number one, by the way.
00:12:58.060 This is how Islam protects women.
00:12:59.340 Number one,
00:12:59.900 speak to the father.
00:13:00.820 Why?
00:13:01.080 Now the man is thinking,
00:13:01.800 speak to the father.
00:13:03.760 I don't want marriage.
00:13:04.560 I just want to mess around.
00:13:05.560 I'm not speaking to your father.
00:13:06.560 Oh,
00:13:07.040 now you know what he's about.
00:13:08.420 Do you see now?
00:13:08.940 Now do you agree?
00:13:10.440 Yeah.
00:13:10.760 Okay, good.
00:13:11.460 So,
00:13:11.860 now,
00:13:12.840 that's protocol number one.
00:13:13.920 It's not finished yet.
00:13:14.580 Oh my gosh,
00:13:15.260 sister,
00:13:15.560 this is the beginning.
00:13:16.560 Do you know what I have to do?
00:13:17.420 That's protocol number one.
00:13:18.540 I had to speak to the father.
00:13:20.220 Then after I spoke to the father,
00:13:21.320 now,
00:13:21.660 I'm getting to know my wife for marriage.
00:13:23.260 Before.
00:13:24.760 Then,
00:13:25.200 he will send a chaperone.
00:13:26.800 Either her sister,
00:13:27.980 or somebody,
00:13:28.740 who when we're getting to know each other,
00:13:29.900 who's there keeping an eye.
00:13:32.220 Got eyes on you.
00:13:34.420 Okay.
00:13:35.500 They're going to kill you.
00:13:36.460 Now,
00:13:37.600 we will go on to,
00:13:39.120 I don't want to call it dates,
00:13:40.280 because it has a bad connotation,
00:13:41.660 but getting to know her.
00:13:42.480 So,
00:13:42.660 we will sometimes go out to eat,
00:13:44.120 we'll go for a walk.
00:13:45.340 Somebody that is there,
00:13:46.400 that's just with us.
00:13:47.580 They don't need to be there.
00:13:48.880 Like,
00:13:49.080 if we're in the restaurant,
00:13:49.600 they'll say,
00:13:49.980 yeah,
00:13:50.060 go sit on the other table.
00:13:51.180 I want to ask some questions.
00:13:52.220 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:13:53.700 That's number two.
00:13:54.420 So,
00:13:54.600 when we're getting to know each other,
00:13:55.520 why?
00:13:56.200 Because a man can say,
00:13:57.220 you know what?
00:13:57.860 Yeah,
00:13:58.120 you know,
00:13:58.280 let me drop you home.
00:13:59.780 He might have bad intentions.
00:14:00.700 He might put something in your drink.
00:14:02.380 So,
00:14:02.820 why?
00:14:03.080 You have the third person there,
00:14:04.200 keeping an eye on both of you.
00:14:05.720 Because the Prophet Muhammad,
00:14:06.700 peace be upon him,
00:14:07.100 said,
00:14:07.560 when a man and a woman is alone,
00:14:09.780 the third is Satan.
00:14:11.920 Because that's how we're created.
00:14:13.080 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:14:13.420 It's like fire and petrol.
00:14:16.080 Boom.
00:14:16.520 Explosion.
00:14:17.520 So,
00:14:18.280 protocol number two.
00:14:19.200 Number three,
00:14:19.780 do you know what I had to do?
00:14:21.260 Dowry.
00:14:22.460 Do you know a dowry?
00:14:23.760 Yes.
00:14:24.400 My wife,
00:14:24.900 she gave me an installment plan.
00:14:26.620 Literal installment plan,
00:14:27.760 yeah?
00:14:28.120 She's laughing.
00:14:28.940 Inst installment plan.
00:14:29.520 Why?
00:14:30.140 She asked for a specific,
00:14:31.080 and I said,
00:14:31.360 you know what?
00:14:33.140 I have to work a bit hard.
00:14:34.600 I have to do some night shifts or that,
00:14:35.780 yeah?
00:14:36.340 But,
00:14:37.020 Alhamdulillah,
00:14:37.780 my intentions were what?
00:14:38.780 Marriage.
00:14:39.440 If I was not interested in marriage,
00:14:41.840 if my intentions were to sleep around,
00:14:45.660 I don't want to meet your dad.
00:14:47.020 I don't want a chaperone.
00:14:48.120 And you're asking me for this much money.
00:14:49.720 What?
00:14:50.340 Get out of here, bruv.
00:14:52.000 Forgive me for saying this,
00:14:53.280 but they can go to some woman who's,
00:14:55.560 whatever,
00:14:56.020 for whatever,
00:14:56.420 yeah?
00:14:56.780 If the man's intention is that.
00:14:58.120 I had no problem.
00:14:58.900 You know why?
00:14:59.520 Because I said,
00:15:00.340 I want to marry you.
00:15:01.320 I'm happy with you.
00:15:02.420 The third protocol is what?
00:15:03.840 I had to pay the mahr.
00:15:05.460 And obviously,
00:15:05.900 she asked for some goat.
00:15:07.180 I was in a bit of debt,
00:15:08.780 but I'm joking.
00:15:10.100 The point is this.
00:15:11.180 I had to pay her that.
00:15:12.380 You know why?
00:15:13.020 That is her security.
00:15:15.040 If me and her divorce,
00:15:16.280 she has that money to rely on Islam.
00:15:19.280 Does that make sense?
00:15:20.020 Yeah, it makes sense.
00:15:20.840 I think you're going to accept Islam today.
00:15:22.820 I'm joking.
00:15:23.740 Inshallah.
00:15:24.320 So,
00:15:25.040 the third thing is what?
00:15:26.620 It's her security.
00:15:28.060 Because now,
00:15:28.900 if that's not there,
00:15:29.560 also she can go back to her father's house.
00:15:31.020 Her father will look after her.
00:15:32.220 My duty is not to look after my wife.
00:15:34.360 It's my daughter and my mom.
00:15:36.320 Because men,
00:15:36.860 we believe,
00:15:37.420 are the head of the house.
00:15:39.040 So,
00:15:39.400 just to make that clear,
00:15:40.000 I don't want to make a sugarcoat it.
00:15:41.460 Men are the ones,
00:15:42.100 of course I listen to my wife,
00:15:43.060 but men are the ones that Allah says in the Quran,
00:15:45.820 that we are the protectors and providers.
00:15:47.280 We're full-time bodyguards.
00:15:48.560 If you think about it,
00:15:49.100 when a thief,
00:15:49.800 like you know they talk about feminism.
00:15:51.300 Yeah,
00:15:51.420 you're a feminist until a thief breaks.
00:15:52.920 Get out,
00:15:53.280 get up,
00:15:53.540 go see.
00:15:53.940 You go.
00:15:55.280 Imagine me telling my wife,
00:15:56.160 you go and she's breaking the window.
00:15:59.040 It's a thief.
00:15:59.560 You go.
00:16:00.240 But I have to go,
00:16:00.920 right?
00:16:01.460 And we can die in the process,
00:16:02.920 but we are proud of that.
00:16:04.260 Now,
00:16:05.220 third,
00:16:05.760 number four,
00:16:06.900 you have to make a wedding.
00:16:08.840 It doesn't have to be extravagant.
00:16:10.780 Simple wedding,
00:16:11.760 and you have to announce it.
00:16:13.540 Why?
00:16:14.340 Because if he,
00:16:15.120 he might be a rich guy.
00:16:16.460 He has no problem speaking to your dad,
00:16:18.360 but maybe he wants to keep you secret.
00:16:20.960 And do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:16:22.000 Nah,
00:16:22.400 now you need to announce it to the community.
00:16:24.400 This is my wife,
00:16:25.140 by the way,
00:16:25.480 guys,
00:16:25.700 come to my wedding.
00:16:26.600 Here's my wife,
00:16:27.180 meet my wife.
00:16:27.880 You're announcing it to the public.
00:16:29.920 So if you do something wrong,
00:16:32.020 the community will take you to account.
00:16:34.060 Why are you treating her?
00:16:34.640 We came to your wedding.
00:16:35.660 Why are you treating her like that?
00:16:37.340 Number three,
00:16:38.000 number four.
00:16:38.640 Now,
00:16:39.140 it doesn't even finish here.
00:16:41.260 They told you about women oppressed,
00:16:42.600 yeah?
00:16:43.000 You're probably thinking,
00:16:43.760 I need to be a Muslim.
00:16:45.100 Yeah,
00:16:45.240 we need to be,
00:16:45.680 you know,
00:16:47.300 are you guys friends?
00:16:48.260 Yeah.
00:16:48.600 Yeah,
00:16:48.820 friends,
00:16:49.160 yeah,
00:16:49.320 okay.
00:16:49.780 So the thing is,
00:16:50.280 maybe one day she would want to marry a Muslim man.
00:16:52.080 So the point is this,
00:16:53.540 after that,
00:16:54.200 now,
00:16:54.640 I,
00:16:55.080 Allah says in the Quran,
00:16:55.860 men are the maintainers and protectors.
00:16:57.940 that means,
00:16:59.160 my wife,
00:17:00.520 I pay the rent.
00:17:01.460 I pay the shopping.
00:17:03.940 I pay the petrol.
00:17:05.380 I pay the tax.
00:17:06.680 I pay the insurance.
00:17:08.000 I pay for the kids.
00:17:10.100 You are not allowed,
00:17:11.560 a woman,
00:17:12.620 you don't need to give a single penny.
00:17:15.320 In Islam,
00:17:16.420 you do not need to give one pound.
00:17:19.040 If you was a millionaire,
00:17:21.120 and your husband worked nine to five,
00:17:23.800 you don't need to give him one pound.
00:17:25.660 That's your money.
00:17:26.580 And you know the money,
00:17:27.360 gave the dowry?
00:17:28.320 That's yours.
00:17:29.280 The gold?
00:17:29.860 That's yours.
00:17:31.060 Why?
00:17:31.560 Because Islam acknowledges,
00:17:32.840 but the man is that head of the household.
00:17:36.200 There has to be,
00:17:36.820 we believe in obedience,
00:17:38.000 but what does that mean?
00:17:38.900 Because it has a connotation.
00:17:40.260 Obedience doesn't mean he beats you up.
00:17:42.520 It's not permissible in Islam.
00:17:44.020 So,
00:17:44.440 the point is what,
00:17:45.160 sister?
00:17:45.840 Does these protocols that are in place,
00:17:48.620 does it not have the advantage of the woman?
00:17:51.840 Seems so.
00:17:52.800 Okay.
00:17:53.360 So,
00:17:53.960 what I'm saying,
00:17:54.740 I promise you,
00:17:55.340 is not a lie.
00:17:55.820 I'm not making it up to make Islam look.
00:17:57.300 I've told you as well,
00:17:58.500 men,
00:17:58.960 men,
00:17:59.280 we look for obedience.
00:18:00.560 So,
00:18:00.840 my wife,
00:18:01.680 I would want her to be obedient towards me.
00:18:03.360 In what?
00:18:03.860 Not,
00:18:04.340 I oppress her,
00:18:05.920 but,
00:18:06.640 for example,
00:18:07.320 Allah has protocols in place.
00:18:08.920 When you get into a dispute,
00:18:11.060 the Quran is such a beautiful thing,
00:18:12.460 it tells you how to manage your disputes.
00:18:14.280 When you guys have friction,
00:18:15.600 when problems arise.
00:18:17.440 Why?
00:18:18.000 Because Islam acknowledges
00:18:19.500 that a woman,
00:18:20.740 there's weakness towards them.
00:18:22.060 I believe women are mentally stronger than us.
00:18:24.940 We men,
00:18:25.640 we're physically stronger,
00:18:26.280 but you guys are mentally stronger.
00:18:27.980 You speak more,
00:18:28.700 you can cry.
00:18:29.460 I can't cry to my friend.
00:18:30.320 My wife didn't know.
00:18:31.460 Shut up,
00:18:31.940 get up,
00:18:32.220 be a man.
00:18:33.220 But as women,
00:18:33.860 you guys express yourself.
00:18:35.200 You can cry.
00:18:36.380 So,
00:18:36.600 the point is this,
00:18:37.300 sister,
00:18:37.840 these things are all set in place
00:18:39.940 for us men to appreciate.
00:18:42.320 Now,
00:18:42.500 I'm asking you a question.
00:18:43.920 If every man done this,
00:18:46.340 would there any be a situation
00:18:47.740 where a woman is heartbroken
00:18:48.920 because she was used for intimacy
00:18:50.180 and left?
00:18:51.500 Probably not.
00:18:52.420 Never.
00:18:52.820 This is the point here,
00:18:54.420 sister.
00:18:55.000 If every woman,
00:18:56.020 that's why I say women are the gatekeepers of sex.
00:18:58.160 If every woman said,
00:18:59.240 no,
00:18:59.980 I'm not dating you.
00:19:01.460 Yeah,
00:19:01.740 why?
00:19:02.300 Because when you go to a,
00:19:03.360 you know when you go to get a Bugatti?
00:19:05.220 You know Bugatti,
00:19:06.080 a car Bugatti?
00:19:07.080 Do you know you can't be just rich?
00:19:08.460 It's not a matter of being rich.
00:19:10.240 Who are you?
00:19:11.800 You come to the store,
00:19:12.760 they say,
00:19:12.960 okay,
00:19:13.200 oh,
00:19:13.400 I'm a millionaire.
00:19:14.000 Okay,
00:19:14.420 no problem.
00:19:14.980 We've got many millionaires.
00:19:16.160 Who are you?
00:19:17.760 Because our car,
00:19:19.120 you might be someone who's an idiot
00:19:20.740 who gives us a bad reputation,
00:19:22.900 yeah?
00:19:23.900 We say woman is far more valuable
00:19:26.040 than any car,
00:19:27.260 any diamond.
00:19:28.360 That's the reason why
00:19:29.340 when you go to buy a Bugatti,
00:19:31.020 they check who you are.
00:19:32.340 Money is,
00:19:33.100 you're going to pay for it anyways.
00:19:34.400 What kind of person you are?
00:19:35.740 What kind of reputation
00:19:36.460 you're going to give to Bugatti?
00:19:37.940 These are the protocols it goes through.
00:19:39.960 Now,
00:19:40.380 after you've gone through that,
00:19:41.360 if somebody works hard for something,
00:19:43.500 he would appreciate that.
00:19:44.360 Yes or no?
00:19:45.180 Yes.
00:19:45.760 That is the point.
00:19:46.760 Now,
00:19:47.140 when that happens,
00:19:48.100 this is the reason why,
00:19:50.440 in Islam,
00:19:51.260 the man has to go through
00:19:52.220 all of this stuff
00:19:52.940 and then,
00:19:53.920 when he marries,
00:19:54.880 he appreciates that.
00:19:56.380 But,
00:19:57.060 if you,
00:19:57.760 if a woman,
00:19:58.420 if a man,
00:19:58.940 if a man,
00:19:59.820 if a man goes to a woman
00:20:01.200 and says,
00:20:02.400 oh,
00:20:02.540 let me take you out for a day,
00:20:03.380 you're so beautiful.
00:20:04.120 And she's like,
00:20:04.360 oh my gosh,
00:20:05.320 Romeo,
00:20:06.380 he's such a charming guy
00:20:07.600 and he's just,
00:20:08.700 his intention is just
00:20:09.960 to have sex and go.
00:20:11.780 You have dishonored that woman.
00:20:14.040 That's why I believe
00:20:14.720 the Western system
00:20:15.680 has dropped women
00:20:16.380 to such a level,
00:20:17.700 forgive me for saying this,
00:20:19.000 and I disagree with you,
00:20:20.080 that's why I'm saying it.
00:20:20.920 It's as if they are toilets.
00:20:22.400 You're basically like,
00:20:23.140 why do you go toilet?
00:20:24.160 To relieve yourself,
00:20:25.080 yes?
00:20:25.260 These men are treating
00:20:27.320 these women like toilets,
00:20:28.480 like you can just go,
00:20:29.560 have intimacy,
00:20:30.320 relieve yourself,
00:20:31.320 and go away.
00:20:32.140 You're breaking that woman.
00:20:33.760 That woman,
00:20:34.220 a woman needs trust.
00:20:35.800 Yes.
00:20:36.220 Security.
00:20:36.880 Yes.
00:20:37.180 Love.
00:20:37.780 Yeah.
00:20:38.080 Thank you.
00:20:38.840 Imagine you come and break it,
00:20:40.260 break it,
00:20:40.660 break it.
00:20:41.220 How are you going to trust
00:20:42.380 the next man that comes?
00:20:43.700 You can't.
00:20:44.280 And this is why women
00:20:45.580 end up breaking the next man
00:20:47.300 they come across
00:20:47.880 because they don't know
00:20:48.460 how to trust.
00:20:49.300 They don't know how to love anymore
00:20:50.400 because you broke that.
00:20:52.360 That's why Islam says,
00:20:53.980 you,
00:20:54.260 when I say to you,
00:20:54.920 as a woman,
00:20:55.420 your soul,
00:20:55.920 your mind,
00:20:56.760 Islam protects that.
00:20:58.660 It says no.
00:20:59.940 And when you cover up,
00:21:01.180 it says,
00:21:01.820 you don't want a man
00:21:02.540 to lust of you.
00:21:04.020 You want him to love you.
00:21:05.460 So that's why Islam says,
00:21:06.920 when a woman is covered up
00:21:07.880 of beauty,
00:21:08.520 yeah,
00:21:09.280 what happens is,
00:21:09.940 the man is thinking,
00:21:10.960 I like her for who she is,
00:21:13.120 not what she possesses.
00:21:15.140 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:21:16.100 And that's why Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala,
00:21:17.740 God Almighty,
00:21:18.660 has put these things in place,
00:21:19.800 so that you,
00:21:21.360 as a woman,
00:21:22.200 are protected.
00:21:23.520 You are,
00:21:23.920 because if you're broken,
00:21:26.180 we believe you guys,
00:21:27.320 mothers make societies.
00:21:29.280 Like,
00:21:29.540 there's one scholar,
00:21:30.180 he said,
00:21:30.520 women are half the population
00:21:32.600 of the earth,
00:21:33.180 and they give birth
00:21:33.860 to the other half.
00:21:34.820 Isn't that true?
00:21:35.680 Yeah.
00:21:35.980 Thank you.
00:21:36.520 So,
00:21:36.900 we believe women are the backbone
00:21:38.500 of the Ummah,
00:21:39.820 Islamic nation.
00:21:40.800 That's why women have to be protected,
00:21:42.640 because you can easily be swayed.
00:21:44.800 You have your menses,
00:21:45.820 your menopause,
00:21:46.820 you get it,
00:21:47.140 you have moments where you say
00:21:48.040 things you don't mean.
00:21:48.960 You know women,
00:21:49.660 they speak covertly.
00:21:51.000 If you say yes,
00:21:51.520 it means no.
00:21:52.300 If you say no,
00:21:52.800 it means yes.
00:21:53.280 If you say yes,
00:21:54.060 it means maybe.
00:21:55.300 So,
00:21:55.740 Allah has acknowledged
00:21:57.120 how you were created.
00:21:58.980 That's why Allah
00:21:59.840 has given you
00:22:00.960 the protocols
00:22:02.160 to protect you.
00:22:03.540 And when we don't do this,
00:22:04.600 sister,
00:22:05.000 in a nutshell,
00:22:05.560 I don't want to give a sermon.
00:22:07.400 This is why you have women
00:22:08.720 who are broken,
00:22:10.160 who are being abused,
00:22:11.040 and etc.
00:22:11.320 Jesus is gone!
00:22:12.360 Jesus is gone!
00:22:13.040 Not a person!
00:22:14.740 Allah!
00:22:17.180 Sorry,
00:22:17.620 this place is a bit of a mental house,
00:22:18.640 by the way.
00:22:19.240 I'm the caretaker here.
00:22:21.000 Okay,
00:22:21.720 yeah.
00:22:22.220 So,
00:22:22.340 the thing is here,
00:22:23.580 sister,
00:22:24.100 this is why women,
00:22:25.440 if you look,
00:22:25.880 for example,
00:22:26.460 bro,
00:22:26.860 look at studies,
00:22:27.760 women are less happy.
00:22:29.300 Why?
00:22:29.800 Because of this,
00:22:30.480 bro,
00:22:30.700 one night stands,
00:22:32.140 you're going around,
00:22:33.200 men are using you,
00:22:34.520 and this is why the women
00:22:35.740 start behaving in that way.
00:22:36.780 You know why?
00:22:37.360 Because we as men,
00:22:38.960 have let them down.
00:22:40.620 If we fixed up,
00:22:41.880 and I'll be honest,
00:22:42.680 we have to sometimes call it,
00:22:44.060 we as men,
00:22:44.780 we need to fix up.
00:22:46.000 And that's why I mentioned,
00:22:47.460 before I came to Islam,
00:22:49.720 well actually,
00:22:50.380 when I came to Islam,
00:22:51.480 before Islam,
00:22:52.280 I was,
00:22:52.540 you know how these men
00:22:53.120 I'm talking about,
00:22:53.680 that was me.
00:22:55.480 I,
00:22:55.980 I saw women as a human being
00:22:58.060 when I became a Muslim.
00:22:59.240 Before that,
00:22:59.880 I did not see them as human.
00:23:01.580 Because my society
00:23:02.680 made me like that.
00:23:03.600 When I became a Muslim,
00:23:05.040 that is when I was like,
00:23:06.400 oh my gosh,
00:23:07.480 and I repented,
00:23:08.200 and I changed my ways.
00:23:09.340 And this is the reason
00:23:09.880 why I talk about this.
00:23:10.860 Why?
00:23:11.420 Because Islam has come
00:23:12.440 to honor women.
00:23:13.400 And that's why
00:23:13.920 answering your question
00:23:14.600 of the hijab.
00:23:15.720 Thank you so much.
00:23:16.600 I learned a lot.
00:23:17.280 May Allah bless you.
00:23:17.900 Any other questions?
00:23:19.500 No problem.
00:23:20.120 If you have any other questions,
00:23:21.100 sister,
00:23:21.780 we're here,
00:23:22.220 you go to Quran.
00:23:23.540 If you want to,
00:23:24.580 if you ever come to Islam,
00:23:25.600 inshallah you do,
00:23:26.100 like I said before,
00:23:27.080 there's so many things.
00:23:27.840 These are the things
00:23:28.220 I'm just mentioning.
00:23:28.960 But,
00:23:29.740 pray to God.
00:23:30.320 I did this 13,
00:23:31.780 14 years ago.
00:23:32.720 I said,
00:23:32.980 God, if you're there,
00:23:34.120 guide me to the truth.
00:23:35.600 And, yeah,
00:23:35.980 hopefully I'll leave that
00:23:36.500 with you, sister.
00:23:36.980 May Allah bless you,
00:23:37.440 inshallah.
00:23:38.020 And if there's anything
00:23:38.600 you have,
00:23:38.920 we're here every Sunday.
00:23:40.140 Thank you, sister.
00:23:40.820 Sister Antia.
00:23:41.320 Take care.
00:23:41.700 Al-Khavtisav, inshallah.
00:23:42.940 Barakabal.
00:23:43.240 Al-Khavtisav, inshallah.
00:23:44.500 And may Allah bless you.
00:23:44.980 Take care, sister Antia.
00:23:45.700 Take care.
00:23:46.000 As-salamu alaykum.
00:23:46.340 Thank you.
00:23:46.600 Good night.
00:23:46.860 Thank you so much.