Ali Dawah - July 12, 2024


HIJABI EXP0SES DAWAH MEN - HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF？


Episode Stats


Length

24 minutes

Words per minute

217.37772

Word count

5,333

Sentence count

549

Harmful content

Misogyny

31

sentences flagged

Toxicity

24

sentences flagged

Hate speech

74

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I talk about why I have a problem with the dawa boys on social media and how they take advantage of the vulnerable in our community. I also talk about how we have been labelled as "Single Mothers" and how we need to stop this label.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 For all the single moms out there, to be warned, Dawa men and their sickening ideologies. 1.00
00:00:08.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:00:09.000 The reason why these Dawa bros... 1.00
00:00:12.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:00:14.000 There has been yet another incident of a Dawa figure. 0.58
00:00:20.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:00:22.000 Let me share with you guys why do I have a deep problem with the Dawa boys on social media. 1.00
00:00:30.000 The main goal of a mentor is to pass on the energy of a win.
00:00:38.000 Those chosen by a mentor have the capability to harness this energy.
00:00:43.000 Brilla, power for your greatest fight.
00:00:46.000 For all the single moms out there, to be warned, Dawa men and their sickening ideologies. 1.00
00:00:54.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:00:55.000 The reason why these Dawa bros... 1.00
00:00:58.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:01:00.000 There has been yet another incident of a Dawa figure. 0.58
00:01:06.000 These Dawa guys. 1.00
00:01:08.000 Let me share with you guys why do I have a deep problem with the Dawa boys on social media. 1.00
00:01:14.000 Yes, our Dawa guys.
00:01:16.000 We are really evil. 1.00
00:01:17.000 Manipulative, narcissistic, gaslighting. 1.00
00:01:22.000 We are just innately evil. 0.99
00:01:24.000 We prey on those that are vulnerable, especially our Muslim sisters. 1.00
00:01:27.000 Yes, that's what we do.
00:01:29.000 We come together collectively and we say how can we take advantage of the most vulnerable in our community.
00:01:34.000 Sisters, single mothers. 0.96
00:01:36.000 I mean brothers and sisters, before I get into the video of the whole situation with Zaid and our dear sister.
00:01:42.000 I want to just talk about a few things.
00:01:44.000 I really want to know where this phenomena is coming from.
00:01:47.000 As if us Dawa guys are just perverted individuals who wake up in the morning.
00:01:52.000 Before we have breakfast, we focus and think and we have this big master plan of taking advantage of sisters.
00:01:58.000 I mean I am just really curious like what is it that we have done that we have got this label?
00:02:04.000 I mean was I caught with prostitutes 3-4 days ago and it was exposed?
00:02:08.000 Was Zaki Naik caught with a woman? 0.61
00:02:12.000 Was Mufti Meng sending nude pics?
00:02:14.000 Was Mohammed Ijab caught in the red light district?
00:02:16.000 What have we done?
00:02:18.000 Ahmed Didat, the great giants of the Dawa.
00:02:21.000 What have we done so much that this label of all these Dawa guys, every single video, 0.99
00:02:26.000 especially from sisters, for some odd reason is these Dawa guys and these Dawa boys and these Dawa men.
00:02:32.000 I mean just imagine for a second I started this video and I've got a lot of personal experiences
00:02:37.000 when it comes to single mothers from my personal life.
00:02:39.000 When I was looking to get married, yes, I've had majority has been very good.
00:02:44.000 And there's been times where it's been bad.
00:02:46.000 Imagine I start a video and I go, these single mother hijabis. 1.00
00:02:51.000 Or more specifically, single mother hijabi Eritreans or Pakistanis or Bengalis or Turkish or whatever you want to name it.
00:02:58.000 Why would I generalise a big group of people to a couple of people that I had a bad experience with?
00:03:05.000 Why?
00:03:06.000 We really need to be careful.
00:03:08.000 There's so much slander being out there and it's all coming down to like us.
00:03:12.000 Now just because someone does something, I mean a couple of months ago it was the whole sisters cannot wear their jacket because their shoulders, 0.86
00:03:18.000 something so ridiculous like that. 0.78
00:03:20.000 Okay? 0.96
00:03:21.000 Now what's that got to do with me?
00:03:22.000 Why are we all in the same category?
00:03:24.000 Something else happens.
00:03:25.000 We're all labelled.
00:03:26.000 So let's not generalise and fear Allah.
00:03:28.000 Allah tells us in the Quran to speak the truth even if it's yourself or your kin.
00:03:32.000 Or your kin.
00:03:34.000 Brothers and sisters, when I came to Islam,
00:03:36.000 wa Allah I got kicked out.
00:03:38.000 I was called ISIS.
00:03:39.000 I was called a terrorist.
00:03:40.000 I was away from my house for three months.
00:03:42.000 Okay?
00:03:43.000 I was kicked out.
00:03:44.000 Okay?
00:03:45.000 And I was called everything.
00:03:46.000 But to me, when I looked in the mirror, I had to be true to myself and say,
00:03:48.000 Ali, am I going to turn my back on this religion because I'm under pressure or this, that and I've been called names?
00:03:54.000 Never.
00:03:55.000 Uqsum Billah. 0.84
00:03:56.000 Never.
00:03:57.000 I don't care if the entire globe came against me.
00:03:59.000 I know Islam is the truth and I will stand by that, inshallah, till the day I die.
00:04:04.000 I'm not going to be swayed.
00:04:05.000 So my loyalty in this situation that I'm going to be talking about is not with anybody.
00:04:10.000 Not with the sister.
00:04:11.000 Not with Zaid. 1.00
00:04:12.000 Not with Muhammad Hijab. 1.00
00:04:13.000 Not with Smajid Jannat, Zeeshan.
00:04:15.000 Not with Mufti Menk. 0.74
00:04:16.000 Nobody.
00:04:17.000 Not even myself.
00:04:18.000 Uqsum Billah. 0.84
00:04:19.000 I swear upon the Rabb of the Kaaba. 0.96
00:04:21.000 I am going to be just as much as I can.
00:04:24.000 Okay?
00:04:25.000 I'm not on nobody's side.
00:04:26.000 One thing I want to mention is I have three daughters.
00:04:29.000 I have a seven-year-old.
00:04:30.000 I have a three-year-old.
00:04:31.000 And I have a one-year-old.
00:04:32.000 They are my daughters.
00:04:34.000 And everyone, every father knows how they are close to their daughters.
00:04:37.000 They are my life and they are a part of me.
00:04:39.000 I would never, ever, ever, even if I did not have daughters before when I didn't,
00:04:44.000 I would never ever be biased or this misconception that has been spread about us around that we're misogynistic, we hate women.
00:04:52.000 I wake up and I just look at my daughters and go, I hate you guys. 0.94
00:04:54.000 I look at my wife and go, I hate you the most actually. 0.99
00:04:56.000 And my mum, let's be just here.
00:04:59.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:05:01.000 Now, coming into this matter, when we're talking about vulnerability and single mothers.
00:05:06.000 Now, I'm going to be very brutal and honest in this matter.
00:05:09.000 And I have done this a long time ago.
00:05:11.000 Nine to ten years ago, me and Aki Eamon done a video about single mothers because he was married to a single mother.
00:05:17.000 I had a cold show called The Reality Show and the videos that you can watch it for yourself.
00:05:21.000 Nine, ten years ago, I was talking about this.
00:05:23.000 I was doing PSAs.
00:05:24.000 Nine, ten years ago.
00:05:25.000 How single mothers are looked down upon, especially in the Asian community.
00:05:28.000 I've spoken about this in the Bitter Truth show as well.
00:05:30.000 How they look down upon as if they are less worthy.
00:05:32.000 They have nothing to offer. 1.00
00:05:33.000 They are trash. 1.00
00:05:34.000 They are used goods. 0.99
00:05:35.000 I have spoken about this nine, ten years ago.
00:05:38.000 So nobody can dare to come and talk to me about, oh, this, that or whatever.
00:05:42.000 If there's anybody that can talk about this issue of vulnerability of single mothers and speaking up for their rights, it has been me.
00:05:47.000 And I don't want a cookie and a thank you very much.
00:05:49.000 I don't need that.
00:05:50.000 And I'm not doing this to boast.
00:05:51.000 I spoke about that.
00:05:52.000 Not only that, about five, six years ago, there was somebody that I knew.
00:05:57.000 I don't want to get into details.
00:05:59.000 Yes.
00:06:00.000 Who was doing things that was inappropriate, messaging sisters in inappropriate ways, calling them to inappropriate things.
00:06:05.000 He was not necessarily in the Dawa scene.
00:06:07.000 Still, I've done a video called Warning Sisters Against Ali Dawa. 0.99
00:06:12.000 Why?
00:06:13.000 I made it clickbait.
00:06:14.000 You guys know I'm a PhD in my clickbait.
00:06:16.000 I've done that and I made a thumbnail that made it look like I got caught out and some sisters exposing me.
00:06:20.000 Alhamdulillah, there was a lot of sisters out there. 1.00
00:06:21.000 Obviously, you know, they're waiting for this opportunity by the way.
00:06:23.000 We're going to talk about those sisters as well.
00:06:24.000 And I've done this video.
00:06:25.000 Why do you think I've done this video?
00:06:26.000 I've done this video to warn sisters that whoever it is, that even if it's Ali Dawa, coming and approaching you, 0.66
00:06:32.000 because I know sisters are hypergamous by nature. 1.00
00:06:35.000 So when it comes to us, we have a great power in our hands.
00:06:37.000 I have to be honest, as people in the public sphere, Dawa or not Dawa, you have a great power in your hands.
00:06:42.000 Because when sisters see you, sadly, they have this attitude of,
00:06:44.000 Oh my gosh, it's Ali Dawa.
00:06:45.000 Oh my gosh, it's this person.
00:06:46.000 They have this.
00:06:47.000 Sadly, we have this power and we need to be responsible with it.
00:06:50.000 That's why I've done that video to tell sisters, my dear sisters, if it is me messaging you, whoever it is,
00:06:57.000 If you see us cross the line, you put it on us and you warn us.
00:07:02.000 And if you see us carrying on, you go public and expose us.
00:07:06.000 If we are calling you to haram, if we are talking to you in an inappropriate way, because it is not permissible.
00:07:12.000 Outright.
00:07:13.000 I've done that video.
00:07:14.000 It was against you.
00:07:15.000 Myself and all the public figures.
00:07:17.000 And it was a message to that brother who was acting up.
00:07:19.000 May Allah forgive him.
00:07:20.000 He's repented.
00:07:21.000 Changed his ways.
00:07:22.000 No problem.
00:07:23.000 But the point is what?
00:07:24.000 It was a warning.
00:07:25.000 So, and we spoke about this on The Bitty Truth as well.
00:07:27.000 Single mothers being looked down upon.
00:07:28.000 Divorces being looked down upon.
00:07:30.000 We talk about how they play the role of a mother and a father.
00:07:32.000 And they should be looked after.
00:07:34.000 And I've emphasized this so many times.
00:07:37.000 That's my point.
00:07:38.000 Now, when it comes to my personal experience.
00:07:40.000 And I'm going to go to the whole Zed issue in a minute. 0.99
00:07:42.000 Our brother Zed and our dear sister.
00:07:44.000 I personally, when I was looking to get married, I met multiple single mothers for marriage. 0.99
00:07:48.000 And I was not married already.
00:07:49.000 I was looking to get married as my first wife.
00:07:52.000 And I was looking to get married.
00:07:55.000 And I would meet single mothers who had two kids.
00:07:58.000 A child.
00:07:59.000 Yes.
00:08:00.000 Some of them divorced sisters.
00:08:02.000 I had no issue with a sister.
00:08:05.000 To me personally, it was like maximum two kids.
00:08:08.000 It was personal preference for me.
00:08:09.000 And I said, a sister with two kids.
00:08:11.000 I have no problem.
00:08:12.000 And believe me, when I went to these marriage meetings and I would meet them.
00:08:15.000 I saw vulnerability.
00:08:17.000 How?
00:08:18.000 Number one, because I'm a public figure.
00:08:19.000 Obviously, when they see me.
00:08:20.000 Oh my gosh, they see me on TV or YouTube.
00:08:21.000 Oh my gosh.
00:08:22.000 It's Ali Tower.
00:08:23.000 You know, he wants to marry me.
00:08:26.000 I was like, wallahi, there was one sister.
00:08:28.000 Allah is my witness.
00:08:30.000 She made it seem as if I was doing her a favor.
00:08:33.000 And I had to reiterate and repeat and say, my dear sister, look.
00:08:36.000 I'm not here to do you a favor.
00:08:37.000 I'm not here.
00:08:38.000 I don't want you to feel.
00:08:39.000 I don't know how a certain community have made you feel.
00:08:41.000 I'm not here to make you feel as if I'm doing you a favor because I am choosing to marry you and you've got kids.
00:08:45.000 I'm not doing that.
00:08:46.000 I'm not here to do that.
00:08:48.000 Okay.
00:08:49.000 I've made that clear.
00:08:50.000 But I noticed this vulnerable situation single mothers were in. 1.00
00:08:54.000 And I'm not seeing all of them are angel, by the way.
00:08:56.000 I've had quite a few.
00:08:58.000 One or two.
00:08:59.000 Majority was good.
00:09:00.000 One or two bad experiences.
00:09:01.000 But the point is what?
00:09:02.000 The vulnerability is there.
00:09:04.000 Now, as men, we have a responsibility to know better.
00:09:09.000 Brothers, I know of stories.
00:09:11.000 I know of stories.
00:09:12.000 And a sister came to me three, four months ago where she was married to somebody.
00:09:16.000 And he married her.
00:09:18.000 And then after that, he just chucked her away.
00:09:20.000 Like this.
00:09:21.000 She spoke to me.
00:09:23.000 I spoke to him in person.
00:09:24.000 You know what I said to her?
00:09:25.000 I said, go expose him.
00:09:26.000 She didn't tell me who it was.
00:09:27.000 I said, I don't give it.
00:09:28.000 I don't even want to know.
00:09:29.000 I don't want to know.
00:09:30.000 Go expose him.
00:09:31.000 Go expose him.
00:09:32.000 Why?
00:09:33.000 Did I say, no, no, no, don't tell anybody.
00:09:34.000 No, no, no.
00:09:35.000 Did he do that to you?
00:09:36.000 Yes.
00:09:37.000 I've heard your side.
00:09:38.000 I don't know who he is.
00:09:39.000 If he did that to you truly, and he's made you feel like this, go public.
00:09:44.000 Not only that, I even said to her, let's do a video.
00:09:46.000 I will interview you.
00:09:47.000 Go public.
00:09:48.000 Why?
00:09:49.000 Is my loyalty with Dawah?
00:09:50.000 Dawah guys? 0.67
00:09:51.000 No, I don't give a damn. 0.98
00:09:52.000 I don't give who you are.
00:09:53.000 My loyalty is Allah and his messenger.
00:09:55.000 So, that is there.
00:09:56.000 We as men need to know better.
00:09:58.000 So, and I'm just saying, by the way, I know some stories of brothers who have married
00:10:01.000 single mothers. 0.99
00:10:02.000 And these single mothers have lied and it's gone pairship. 1.00
00:10:06.000 Brothers, don't look at single mothers as like, oh, they are absolutely innocent.
00:10:10.000 No, no, no.
00:10:11.000 Be careful.
00:10:12.000 Be wary.
00:10:13.000 Single mothers, be wary of brothers. 1.00
00:10:14.000 Brothers, let there be that thing there.
00:10:16.000 No problem.
00:10:17.000 We have to be cautious.
00:10:18.000 You have to tie your camel.
00:10:19.000 So, the point I'm seeing is, there is vulnerability on that side.
00:10:22.000 And one thing that I would say, which I do not agree with Sister Soul.
00:10:25.000 I'm going to mention her.
00:10:26.000 Yep, Sister Soul, you're watching this probably.
00:10:27.000 May Allah bless and preserve you.
00:10:28.000 One thing she would always say on the Bitter Truth Show is what?
00:10:31.000 Healing.
00:10:32.000 Accountability.
00:10:33.000 I would just love it.
00:10:34.000 When Sister Soul would say, accountability and healing.
00:10:38.000 May Allah bless her with an Algerian French accent. 0.99
00:10:42.000 Accountability and healing.
00:10:44.000 Accountability and healing.
00:10:45.000 If my dear sisters, if you guys do not go through the process of healing and accountability.
00:10:49.000 Because you need to look at this whole phenomenon as well of your ex-husbands are all narcissists and manipulators.
00:10:55.000 All of them. 0.94
00:10:56.000 SubhanAllah.
00:10:57.000 When I speak to the majority of single mothers who come to me.
00:10:58.000 For some odd reason, all of their ex-husbands are like that.
00:11:01.000 Sometimes there has to be accountability.
00:11:02.000 There has to be healing.
00:11:04.000 Once you do the healing, then you can get out of this zone of thinking,
00:11:07.000 Oh my gosh, I'm less worthy.
00:11:08.000 No, you're not.
00:11:09.000 You're a Muslim woman. 0.99
00:11:10.000 Allah SubhanAllah has honored you.
00:11:11.000 Allah has honored you.
00:11:12.000 And you should not settle.
00:11:14.000 But you should also be realistic on your expectations as well.
00:11:17.000 This goes both ways.
00:11:18.000 Now, coming to this issue.
00:11:21.000 Brother Zaid's situation and our dear sister.
00:11:24.000 May Allah SubhanAllah bless and preserve them both.
00:11:27.000 May Allah protect and preserve their honor, both of them.
00:11:30.000 It is the duty of a Muslim to defend the honor of where it is.
00:11:33.000 And if they are wrong, it's to call them to account.
00:11:35.000 And this is what we do.
00:11:36.000 If somebody crosses the boundaries of the Sharia, we will call them out. 1.00
00:11:40.000 And if they don't, we will defend them to the death of us.
00:11:43.000 I don't care who it is.
00:11:44.000 Sister, single mother, brother, I don't care who it is. 1.00
00:11:46.000 We will defend the honor.
00:11:48.000 In this situation, I heard these stories.
00:11:51.000 Things going on next session.
00:11:52.000 I didn't know what was going on.
00:11:53.000 I didn't know what was going on.
00:11:54.000 Okay, I heard this.
00:11:55.000 This happened.
00:11:56.000 That happened.
00:11:57.000 When I started to think, SubhanAllah, like something really bad happened. 0.82
00:12:01.000 Like really, really bad.
00:12:02.000 Like I thought like, man, this is like coming in Zina. 0.99
00:12:05.000 Was he calling the sister to hotels?
00:12:07.000 Was he?
00:12:08.000 I just didn't know what was going on.
00:12:09.000 Because the situation was because like, I was just seeing this video here.
00:12:11.000 This single, these Dawah guys. 1.00
00:12:13.000 I was like, Rahma, what came out?
00:12:14.000 I don't know what came out.
00:12:15.000 And after I watched the sister's video, I said, bro, I'll be honest with you.
00:12:18.000 I don't blame the sister at all.
00:12:20.000 For her to feel, for her to feel how she felt, I don't blame her.
00:12:26.000 Like the words, the choice of words you used, the way you came across, bro.
00:12:30.000 I understand.
00:12:31.000 Look, I'm a man.
00:12:32.000 I've been in a situation, bro.
00:12:33.000 It was peak.
00:12:34.000 When I was new to Islam and I was not married for three years, coming from a jahlia, looking 1.00
00:12:37.000 to get married and it's difficult to get married.
00:12:39.000 It was peak.
00:12:41.000 It was peak, bro.
00:12:42.000 Believe me.
00:12:43.000 I've been where you're at.
00:12:44.000 I understand.
00:12:45.000 I hear you.
00:12:46.000 But bro, the way you approached it, the way you made her feel, yes, was wrong and she deserves
00:12:51.000 an apology.
00:12:52.000 And Brother Zaid will do that apology, inshallah.
00:12:54.000 However, there is context.
00:12:56.000 Now we need to cut things in context because I was under the assumption that Brother Zaid proposed
00:13:01.000 to her.
00:13:02.000 Now, let's listen to the voice notes because I listened to it a couple of times and I
00:13:06.000 noticed a specific pattern.
00:13:07.000 Now, let's just listen to it ourselves, inshallah.
00:13:09.000 So, obviously, this is an amanah between Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala but it's just a query
00:13:13.000 which is long story short due to my situation.
00:13:15.000 I'm not married yet, by the way.
00:13:16.000 I've never been married.
00:13:17.000 However, as you can understand as a man, this is very difficult, especially in the time
00:13:20.000 of fitna that I live in, especially considering my social media and the fitna of that.
00:13:24.000 And obviously, coming from a cultural family, as do a lot of people, you know, the
00:13:28.000 typical traditional marriage is very difficult sometimes to find that person.
00:13:32.000 You know, families get together, there's a, you know, walima, blah, blah, blah.
00:13:35.000 It's, you know, the woman's first time getting married and the same for the man. 0.94
00:13:37.000 You know, traditional marriage from two, essentially, virgins.
00:13:39.000 But my question is and query is, I was thinking that since I'm struggling to find the woman
00:13:46.000 or a woman for marriage as a sort of first wife that I would call a traditional wife 0.87
00:13:51.000 that my family meets and they go over houses and then there's in-laws and all this typical
00:13:54.000 stuff, I was thinking in the meantime, until I find that, because it's quite difficult
00:13:57.000 to find what I'm looking for, what my family would be happy with, I was thinking to just
00:14:00.000 marry someone else in the meantime.
00:14:02.000 And the option that I was thinking of was someone like a single mother for the following 0.96
00:14:06.000 reasons.
00:14:07.000 One is that, you know, she's been married before, she already has children, so her expectations
00:14:11.000 of her husband might not necessarily be as much as a virgin woman.
00:14:15.000 And two, I think she would probably understand my situation and, you know, what I'm looking
00:14:20.000 for.
00:14:21.000 Does that make sense?
00:14:22.000 And would probably be supportive of it, perhaps, or cooperative in it.
00:14:24.000 And she probably wouldn't be as interested as, you know, a virgin girl in getting to know 0.98
00:14:29.000 the family and in-laws and all this stuff, because she's already been through it.
00:14:31.000 You know, she's got a kid and she's just raising the kid and she just wants a man there 1.00
00:14:34.000 who, you know, she can spend some quality time with every now and then, who can, you know,
00:14:37.000 they can protect each other and love each other and protect each other from zinner mainly 1.00
00:14:40.000 and look after each other, essentially marrying a woman and basically not telling your family
00:14:47.000 about it.
00:14:48.000 Obviously, as a man, I'm allowed to do this.
00:14:49.000 This is fine.
00:14:50.000 I'm my own mahram.
00:14:51.000 I'm my own man.
00:14:52.000 But my simple question was, as a single mother yourself, in your humble opinion and experience,
00:14:57.000 do you think this is a wise idea or, you know, to marry, basically for me to marry someone
00:15:02.000 like a single mother, just so I can have someone there, protect myself, have that affection
00:15:07.000 and love that every man needs until I, not with the intention of divorce, of course not,
00:15:10.000 but like, as someone there, until I find that traditional quote unquote wife that, you know, 0.85
00:15:16.000 my family would know and all these things, whereas the family wouldn't know of this other
00:15:20.000 sort of single mother wife. 0.98
00:15:22.000 So what do you think, as someone who is raising a, you know, beautiful child as yourself,
00:15:25.000 is this something that's, you know, how would you feel as a single mother about that?
00:15:28.000 I'm not talking about you specifically.
00:15:29.000 I mean, just single mothers in general.
00:15:31.000 If a man came with this idea to you, what would you think?
00:15:34.000 Would you be cooperative?
00:15:35.000 Would you be like, no, of course not.
00:15:37.000 Would you understand the situation?
00:15:38.000 Would you tell him, no, just, you know, be patient even more and go find that first wife, 0.99
00:15:42.000 traditional wife, blah, blah, blah. 1.00
00:15:43.000 You know, what do you think, what would you advise?
00:15:46.000 Just bearing in mind that I'm a man, I'm 27 now.
00:15:49.000 Obviously, as you understand that a man is, it's much more difficult for a man to maintain, 0.98
00:15:53.000 you know, and to control themselves from that aspect physiologically,
00:15:56.000 you know, 20 times more than a woman. 1.00
00:15:58.000 So, you know, it's getting very difficult at the moment.
00:16:00.000 So please let me know, inshallah, may Allah bless you,
00:16:01.000 and this isn't a man between us.
00:16:03.000 So now, guys, if you've heard it, he's talking on the third person.
00:16:06.000 Do you think he's basically, when I listened to her, I was like, hold on a second,
00:16:09.000 you didn't propose to her?
00:16:10.000 I said, then where's this rumor going around as if you proposed to her?
00:16:12.000 He's like, well, no, I didn't.
00:16:14.000 This is what happened.
00:16:16.000 A sister, after Zaid done Hajj, a sister who's a single mother proposed to Zaid for marriage.
00:16:21.000 And he was considering this.
00:16:24.000 And I'll have the receipts in front of you.
00:16:25.000 There you guys.
00:16:26.000 Okay.
00:16:27.000 All right.
00:16:28.000 And I'm just giving context, by the way.
00:16:29.000 Before, guys, oh, here we go.
00:16:30.000 He's defending.
00:16:31.000 I'm not defending no one.
00:16:32.000 I'm bringing context because there are people accusing Zaid of calling her to mutas in a marriage.
00:16:36.000 Audhu billah.
00:16:37.000 Let's be just.
00:16:38.000 Let's be just here.
00:16:39.000 What he did and how he done it was wrong,
00:16:41.000 and he should apologize for making that sister feel like that.
00:16:44.000 However, Zaid has approached this sister.
00:16:47.000 I don't know the sister.
00:16:48.000 This is his name.
00:16:49.000 May Allah bless her and preserve her.
00:16:51.000 And he's asking her for a Naseer.
00:16:53.000 And he's saying this is in a manner.
00:16:55.000 So he's come to her, which is the most naive, awkwardly naive thing I've ever seen in my life.
00:16:59.000 I told Zaid, I was so awkwardly naive, bro.
00:17:01.000 And then he's messaging her and saying, I am planning on da-da-da-da-da-da, you know the thing.
00:17:06.000 Traditional wife, till then, etc.
00:17:08.000 But one thing you notice, he does not say, I want to marry this sister.
00:17:13.000 Not her.
00:17:14.000 He's asking for Naseer on behalf of the other sister proposed to him.
00:17:19.000 So he's saying, do you think it's the right thing to do?
00:17:21.000 So now the sister has a right to be offended in the message and tell him, brother,
00:17:25.000 and give him Naseer.
00:17:26.000 Put him in his place.
00:17:27.000 Stick it on him.
00:17:28.000 No problem.
00:17:29.000 The brother has come to you, my dear sister,
00:17:31.000 which I believe this is a mistake you made.
00:17:33.000 It was an amana.
00:17:34.000 Now you broke that amana. 0.83
00:17:35.000 No problem.
00:17:36.000 I'm not going to come and say to you it was wrong.
00:17:37.000 However, my dear sister has come to you asking you,
00:17:41.000 and I know you feel offended on behalf of other sisters of single mothers
00:17:44.000 because of his conditions or whatever for that matter.
00:17:47.000 But he does not say he wants to temporarily marry.
00:17:50.000 He's saying he wants to find the second wife first, 1.00
00:17:53.000 which is going to be his first wife, then become his second wife.
00:17:55.000 Okay.
00:17:56.000 And then he's going to stay married to her, etc.
00:17:59.000 Okay.
00:18:00.000 Now, looking at this, this is called misyar marriage. 1.00
00:18:03.000 What is misyar marriage? 0.99
00:18:04.000 Misyar marriage is at the discretion of the woman. 0.79
00:18:07.000 So the woman has the right to say, I forgo my rights. 1.00
00:18:10.000 I choose to.
00:18:12.000 She can say by night, financially, whatever.
00:18:15.000 It's at her discretion.
00:18:16.000 She can let go of her rights. 0.92
00:18:18.000 Now, this is not for every sister and sister can feel offended.
00:18:20.000 That's fine and good.
00:18:21.000 But a sister who doesn't mind being in that situation for the sister who proposed to him, etc.
00:18:27.000 You cannot blame her and make her feel like she is, you know, not getting her worth or whatever for that matter.
00:18:32.000 It is between two adults.
00:18:33.000 If they want to do that, that's at their discretion.
00:18:36.000 But if we're looking at the thing, there was nothing haram done.
00:18:40.000 Please bring me evidence from the Quran and Sunnah if the proposal was haram.
00:18:44.000 Was it offensive?
00:18:45.000 Yes.
00:18:46.000 Was it made to seem like she is less worthy?
00:18:48.000 Yes.
00:18:49.000 But the amanah was there.
00:18:52.000 And I want to put you guys and put yourself in this situation.
00:18:55.000 If a sister messaged me as a married man and said, Brother Ali, there is, for example, asking me for nasir.
00:19:03.000 I want to ask you for nasir.
00:19:04.000 Please, this is in a manner between us and you.
00:19:05.000 No problem, sister.
00:19:06.000 What's the question?
00:19:07.000 There is a brother.
00:19:08.000 I'm in a financially difficult situation.
00:19:10.000 I've got two kids.
00:19:11.000 And I don't really like him.
00:19:12.000 It's not my liking.
00:19:13.000 But I feel it's enough for myself.
00:19:15.000 And financially, he's a rich guy.
00:19:17.000 I don't, you know, financially, I'm not in a good place.
00:19:19.000 I want to marry him.
00:19:21.000 Now, in this situation, you would see that he is, she is basically kind of taking an opportunity of him.
00:19:27.000 He's kind of in a vulnerable situation.
00:19:29.000 He, she wants to marry him.
00:19:30.000 Now, I would personally say, my dear sister, if you don't have attraction,
00:19:33.000 to him, if you don't like him like that, I wouldn't advise you to do that.
00:19:37.000 However, I would feel offended.
00:19:38.000 I would like, you know what?
00:19:39.000 I mean, the fact that you want to marry him for his, you know, money.
00:19:42.000 And, you know, you want to protect yourself from sin.
00:19:44.000 Okay.
00:19:45.000 It's an honorable thing.
00:19:46.000 I understand.
00:19:47.000 I would be a bit tasteful.
00:19:48.000 Now, imagine if I broke the Amana and I went public.
00:19:50.000 I just want you guys to understand.
00:19:52.000 I'm not blaming the sister, but just put yourself in the shoe.
00:19:54.000 If I went to public and I exposed and smashed and I said, this sister just messaged me.
00:19:58.000 I'm warning everyone against this kind of sisters who are using men as a cash machine, gold diggers, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. 1.00
00:20:06.000 What would you sisters say? 0.97
00:20:07.000 Would you sisters not come to me and say, oh my gosh, she messaged you privately.
00:20:11.000 It was an Amana.
00:20:12.000 Yes.
00:20:13.000 Maybe what she done was wrong.
00:20:14.000 Wanting to marry the guy for gold again or whatever, protect yourself from sin or whatever.
00:20:18.000 That's not necessarily wrong.
00:20:19.000 But you didn't have to go public.
00:20:20.000 Why are you putting on blast for her?
00:20:22.000 She was in a vulnerable state.
00:20:23.000 You will do everything in your power to defend that sister.
00:20:26.000 Yes.
00:20:27.000 And I would say, you know what?
00:20:29.000 That's valid.
00:20:30.000 Now, how has Zaid become a predator?
00:20:34.000 I really want to understand.
00:20:36.000 He's coming there naively and telling you the blueprint of what he thinks is good to do.
00:20:41.000 And he's coming to you as a single mother out of everybody for that matter.
00:20:44.000 Because you're a single mother, you're going to be more offended. 1.00
00:20:45.000 And he's telling you, should I do this?
00:20:47.000 My dear sister, all you have to do is tell him and put him in his place and say, what you're doing is wrong.
00:20:51.000 You shouldn't do it.
00:20:52.000 Single mothers, da, da, da, da, da, etc. 0.72
00:20:54.000 Give him a seat and pack him and do a general video.
00:20:57.000 And if you did a video generally without mentioning his name, fully I would have shared that video no problem.
00:21:03.000 Because I know there are men out there who take advantage of vulnerable sisters.
00:21:06.000 I do.
00:21:07.000 But the point is what?
00:21:08.000 The point is that people are now turned this into a muta marriage, zina, he's this, he should be warned. 0.98
00:21:15.000 Dawah guys, all of them. 0.99
00:21:16.000 Audhu billah. 0.95
00:21:18.000 This is disgusting.
00:21:20.000 Don't generalize everyone.
00:21:22.000 Do not generalize everyone.
00:21:24.000 My matter in this is that.
00:21:26.000 Brother Zaid should apologize for making the sister feel in that way less worthy that you know, whatever it's for that matter.
00:21:32.000 No problem.
00:21:33.000 The sister felt offended. 0.87
00:21:34.000 No problem.
00:21:35.000 However, mistyar marriage is totally, totally valid. 1.00
00:21:38.000 And it is at the discretion of a woman.
00:21:40.000 And let me tell you, my dear sisters, a hint why men, men are going down this route of having secret second wives,
00:21:48.000 which we've done a whole show about.
00:21:49.000 And people think I just done it for the sake of it.
00:21:51.000 Because of their first wives. 0.99
00:21:54.000 Blunt to the point.
00:21:55.000 And I've said this before.
00:21:56.000 Because of the pressure of the first wife. 0.96
00:21:58.000 Because we as men are polygamous by nature.
00:22:00.000 I do not care how much you hate that.
00:22:03.000 I do not care how much you're going to attack me.
00:22:05.000 I will speak the truth.
00:22:07.000 I do not need your thank you.
00:22:08.000 I do not need your applause.
00:22:09.000 I don't care about you talking bad about it.
00:22:11.000 I do not care.
00:22:12.000 I do not care.
00:22:13.000 As long as it is the haq. 1.00
00:22:14.000 Men, Muslims are polygamous by nature. 1.00
00:22:16.000 And I know so many, so many who have, are getting secret second wives.
00:22:22.000 Why?
00:22:23.000 Because their first wife will destroy. 1.00
00:22:26.000 And let me tell you something.
00:22:27.000 In most scenarios, does the first wife come and say, this is a single mother, vulnerable, look after her? 1.00
00:22:33.000 No.
00:22:34.000 It is those women, single, the first wives, who are saying, I don't care. 1.00
00:22:39.000 To hell with her. 1.00
00:22:40.000 Hope she dies. 1.00
00:22:41.000 Wallahi. 1.00
00:22:42.000 They destroy these marriages. 1.00
00:22:44.000 You know who it is?
00:22:45.000 It is the first wives destroying it. 1.00
00:22:47.000 Even if they marry somebody who is not a single mother.
00:22:50.000 Even if brothers wanted to do something good.
00:22:52.000 And let me be honest with you.
00:22:53.000 And I tell this to the brothers.
00:22:55.000 Do not oppress a single mother or any woman because you fear your first wife.
00:23:02.000 Do not.
00:23:03.000 Give them their rights.
00:23:04.000 Give them their due rights.
00:23:05.000 Look after them.
00:23:06.000 You have to marry them. 0.96
00:23:07.000 Even if it is misyad.
00:23:08.000 You have agreed to two days, three days, whatever for that matter.
00:23:11.000 You have to love them.
00:23:13.000 You have to treat them like your wife. 1.00
00:23:15.000 Not like some side chick. 0.96
00:23:16.000 Islam has come to protect. 0.90
00:23:18.000 Polygamy has come to defend the right of the woman. 0.99
00:23:20.000 You look after her.
00:23:21.000 You cherish her.
00:23:22.000 You take care of her.
00:23:23.000 You treat their kids as much as like your kids to the best of your ability.
00:23:27.000 I am not saying you must love them like their own father loves them.
00:23:29.000 No.
00:23:30.000 But do not at the cost of your first wife.
00:23:33.000 Fear.
00:23:34.000 You fearing your first wife. 0.56
00:23:35.000 That you now oppress.
00:23:37.000 And my dear sisters.
00:23:38.000 I have said this before.
00:23:39.000 And I will finish on this note.
00:23:40.000 Ask for a decent mahr.
00:23:42.000 And have a proper guardian that cares about you.
00:23:45.000 Not some next waste man.
00:23:47.000 Who is just going to be there and be like yeah.
00:23:49.000 No.
00:23:50.000 Have a proper guardian.
00:23:51.000 And ask for a decent mahr.
00:23:53.000 These are the two things that will protect you against men who are preying on vulnerable women.
00:23:57.000 And my brothers.
00:23:59.000 Do not look at every woman. 1.00
00:24:01.000 Single mother or not. 0.92
00:24:02.000 And see as if they are just you know.
00:24:04.000 Miskeen. 0.93
00:24:05.000 Trust me.
00:24:06.000 Horror stories.
00:24:07.000 So be careful yourself as well.
00:24:08.000 I am not going to make this about.
00:24:09.000 Oh.
00:24:10.000 All sisters are vulnerable.
00:24:11.000 No.
00:24:12.000 They are not.
00:24:13.000 Oh believe me.
00:24:14.000 They are not.
00:24:15.000 And that's all I want to say.
00:24:16.000 Anything I said bad is from shaitan and myself.
00:24:18.000 Anything good is from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. 0.98
00:24:19.000 Hope this has clarified it.
00:24:21.000 And Zaid inshaAllah will come out with an apology. 0.99
00:24:23.000 Which he rightly should do so.
00:24:25.000 And I will leave this matter.
00:24:26.000 Hopefully I haven't forgot about anything.
00:24:28.000 Alhamdulillah.
00:24:29.000 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.