Ali Dawah - April 21, 2024


HUSBAND FINDS THIS ON WIFES PHONE & HELL BREAKS LOOSE!! - REACTION


Episode Stats


Length

14 minutes

Words per minute

206.70567

Word count

3,062

Sentence count

276

Harmful content

Misogyny

32

sentences flagged

Toxicity

9

sentences flagged

Hate speech

31

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about a situation where a Muslim woman found out that her husband found out about her affair with other Muslim men in her iCloud files. We also talk about the double standard when it comes to women and their privacy.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 This week, I discovered that in her iCloud files, she had so many pictures of her with different men.
00:00:11.260 Brothers and sisters, just imagine for a second that you give £10 in donation and that £10 is used to buy food or bricks or whatever to help the people in Gaza.
00:00:19.420 But then just imagine this amazing thing that you want to do, but we turn it into a money-making machine. How?
00:00:24.980 The Waqf is exactly that. They take your money and the money that we are going to put in this Waqf, this building, and every single time the money generated from that Waqf, that building, is going to go to our Palestinian brothers and sisters for the next 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 100, 150 years. 0.98
00:00:44.380 And this will be a form of true Sadaqah Jariah. I myself will be donating for that, inshaAllah.
00:00:50.540 Click the link below and donate. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala bless and preserve you guys.
00:00:53.980 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh, brothers and sisters and dear friends.
00:00:57.160 Hope you guys are well, inshaAllah.
00:00:57.940 This is another episode with me and my wife.
00:01:01.060 That's not what the show is called, it's just, I'm just letting you guys on me and my wife.
00:01:03.580 Assalamualaikum.
00:01:05.480 How are you doing? Hope you're well, inshaAllah.
00:01:06.640 Thanks for being here.
00:01:07.440 And we look forward to your contributions because it's very, very important to have a female perspective on matters that I might miss.
00:01:13.420 It might go over my head.
00:01:14.540 So, as you know, if there's anything you believe that I say wrong, please feel free to correct me, alhamdulillah.
00:01:18.960 InshaAllah, you know, what do they say? Wisdom is the lost property of the believer and he takes it where he finds it. 1.00
00:01:26.280 So, like I said before, I'm not infallible.
00:01:28.880 And yes, inshaAllah, if there's anything that you think I'm wrong in, which a lot of sisters believe I'm wrong in, you can voice it, inshaAllah.
00:01:34.240 And there'll be no consequences.
00:01:35.300 You can just blink twice, inshaAllah, if you are in danger.
00:01:37.780 In a nutshell, brothers and sisters, jokes aside, inshaAllah, I'm here with my wife.
00:01:40.620 We are going to be doing a reaction video.
00:01:42.160 The reason we're doing this, brothers and sisters, I have the Bitter Truth Show, which we talk about as issues.
00:01:45.480 But sometimes with my wife, obviously, there's things that she can say to me.
00:01:48.920 Maybe the sisters in the panel can't. 0.99
00:01:51.340 May Allah bless him, inshaAllah.
00:01:52.020 And if you guys want to watch the Bitter Truth Show, inshaAllah, it will really, really help.
00:01:54.400 I believe it will help your household, inshaAllah.
00:01:55.880 We'll discuss many other things.
00:01:57.520 Now, when I saw this video here, guys, I was like, the comments was even more crazy.
00:02:02.300 And this just shows, again, this is what I mean, where there's an absolute double standard.
00:02:07.600 This happens a lot with sisters. 0.90
00:02:10.520 I'm going to be honest, tell me if I'm wrong.
00:02:12.020 The double standard, it's crazy.
00:02:13.580 And I'm going to tell you, if I'm wrong, please correct me.
00:02:15.620 Please correct me.
00:02:16.440 We're going to watch for ourselves.
00:02:17.280 Okay, here's a situation of a man who marries this sister.
00:02:22.540 They're Muslim, I'm assuming, because this is arranged marriage. 1.00
00:02:24.360 And he finds out things after.
00:02:26.920 Now, I'm assuming he went through his phone, whatever it is for the matter.
00:02:29.580 But we're going to talk about that.
00:02:31.740 So here's a video.
00:02:32.380 We're going to react with my wife.
00:02:33.720 And then after that, my wife, if you guys are new to this, she has a little whiteboard that I bought her.
00:02:38.480 There we go.
00:02:39.460 She's going to express it through there.
00:02:40.920 That's out of her choice.
00:02:41.840 Not that she's not allowed to speak.
00:02:43.340 She prefers not to or to the minimalist.
00:02:45.880 So she wants to express herself through the whiteboard if there's something she disagrees.
00:02:49.320 If she wants to elaborate, I've told her, she can vocalize it or she can tell me in my ear.
00:02:53.340 And I would repeat it to the best of my ability, inshallah.
00:02:55.940 So, here's a video.
00:02:57.480 Are you ready?
00:02:58.540 You sure?
00:02:59.400 Okay.
00:02:59.660 I found that my wife was sleeping around before we got married. 1.00
00:03:05.960 It's an arranged marriage and her mum and her family acted like they were the most pious and religious people possible.
00:03:11.640 This week, I discovered that in her iCloud files, she had so many pictures of her with different men in bed, in her apartment, in college.
00:03:24.000 He's saying she never told me about this and I have yet to confront her.
00:03:28.420 We've only been married six months and I'm, like, losing it.
00:03:31.760 I don't know what to do, but I just feel angry that I've been lied to and that she put on a fake face.
00:03:37.300 There's a screenshot in there of her texting some other guy and saying that she wanted to have his baby. 0.69
00:03:42.260 Allah!
00:03:44.120 She is disrespectful. 0.99
00:03:46.100 She is trying.
00:03:46.740 Why are you doing this to the brother?
00:03:48.620 Like, goodness.
00:03:49.400 And this screenshot was only taken three months prior to our wedding date.
00:03:54.520 Okay, you saw that for yourself, yeah?
00:03:55.840 Okay.
00:03:56.700 Now, there's a few things that I just wanted to point out.
00:03:58.420 Because I just believe it's fair.
00:03:59.800 Okay, now tell me if I'm wrong.
00:04:01.100 Number one, the reaction of the sister.
00:04:03.380 The sister on the left, I don't know, yeah?
00:04:04.840 She's like, oh, why would you do that to her brother? 0.98
00:04:07.540 I just, and I know it's not intentional.
00:04:08.940 I know she's not coming from a malicious place.
00:04:10.640 But I'm just going to reverse the whole role.
00:04:12.740 I'm going to reverse everything.
00:04:13.680 And I just want to see if a man did that, how the dynamics would be.
00:04:17.820 Okay, now, firstly, would you agree or disagree with him going through her phone?
00:04:25.200 Write it down.
00:04:25.860 In the meantime, I'm going to express myself.
00:04:27.000 Number one, as men, and I make this very clear even in my marriage, alhamdulillah, that do not go through each other's phones.
00:04:34.180 Why?
00:04:35.160 Brothers and sisters, especially men, look, like they say, ignorance is bliss.
00:04:40.380 Don't go through your wife's phone. 0.93
00:04:41.700 Number one, and we've done a whole episode on this on the bit of truth.
00:04:44.520 Don't go through your wife's phone because it can be that there are pictures of her sisters there, pictures of her friends there, without a hijab or whatever for that matter.
00:04:50.940 That's number one.
00:04:51.880 Number two, there might be private things she discusses.
00:04:54.460 It might be, you know how women are. 1.00
00:04:56.660 Sometimes it can be emotional.
00:04:57.800 You've upset her.
00:04:58.660 She's on her menses or whatever. 0.82
00:05:00.520 And she wants to, one second, and she wants to basically express it.
00:05:04.500 Maybe she says something about you, but she doesn't mean it.
00:05:06.980 You've seen that's going to upset her.
00:05:08.180 Worst, in which case, scenario, which is what?
00:05:11.000 You might see something from her past that could destroy your marriage.
00:05:14.760 Because for us men, we have a khira that there are certain pills we cannot swallow.
00:05:20.100 And I'm going to come to how I would have reacted.
00:05:22.560 This is me personally, Ali, not Islam. 0.98
00:05:24.360 This is Ali.
00:05:25.300 But here's what my wife said.
00:05:26.740 He shouldn't be going through her phone.
00:05:28.600 I agree.
00:05:29.140 There we go.
00:05:29.580 Before someone says you're manipulating it.
00:05:30.620 There we go.
00:05:30.980 Yeah.
00:05:31.540 There we go.
00:05:31.920 I agree as well.
00:05:33.040 He shouldn't be going through her phone.
00:05:35.540 You should not.
00:05:36.120 And neither should she be going through your phone.
00:05:38.360 Because the same things apply vice versa.
00:05:42.200 However, however, we can say that was a sin.
00:05:45.940 He should not have done it.
00:05:46.700 He done it.
00:05:47.580 He found out.
00:05:48.120 Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. 0.60
00:05:48.960 You want to call it whatever.
00:05:49.840 Like export.
00:05:50.500 Whatever you want to call it.
00:05:51.140 Yeah.
00:05:51.820 Now, do you want to read the comments?
00:05:53.460 Check this out.
00:05:54.100 Are you ready?
00:05:55.120 First, first of all.
00:05:57.220 What she did before marriage is not her husband's business.
00:06:01.560 Nearly 1,000 likes.
00:06:03.440 Yeah.
00:06:05.080 Her parents might be religious.
00:06:06.760 You can't say it's her parents' fault.
00:06:09.380 They might not even know what their daughter's been doing.
00:06:12.420 Okay.
00:06:13.280 Why is he going through her iCloud messages and pictures?
00:06:16.140 Her past is hers and she's only answerable to Allah. 1.00
00:06:20.560 She chose to marry you and her past has nothing to do with you.
00:06:25.080 This is why men have double standards.
00:06:27.660 We're about to find out.
00:06:30.000 Bro married the town bike.
00:06:31.780 Oh, okay.
00:06:33.660 Where are people in the comments defending her?
00:06:35.820 Why are people in the comments defending her?
00:06:37.800 Yeah.
00:06:39.420 It's insane how many people always rush to support of the woman and start bashing the man blindly no matter what.
00:06:46.700 Somebody wrote divorce. 0.99
00:06:48.260 Yeah.
00:06:48.640 Now, another one.
00:06:49.980 What about a guy who sleeps around before marriage?
00:06:52.760 Valid.
00:06:53.540 She'll never change.
00:06:54.600 She's got da-da-da-da-da-da-da. 1.00
00:06:55.960 Now, mainly you see females writing down what? 1.00
00:07:02.220 What are females doing mainly? 1.00
00:07:03.800 Defending her.
00:07:05.000 Now, I want to reverse the roles.
00:07:07.620 Please don't kill me in the process.
00:07:09.760 What I'm going to do is the following.
00:07:10.520 Now, in that situation, brothers and sisters, for all of these people that are saying this, yeah?
00:07:16.140 Now, me personally, if that was to happen to me, that is a pill that I will not and cannot swallow.
00:07:23.160 May Allah forgive me.
00:07:24.560 If I found that out, for me, it is an instant end.
00:07:30.020 Because, number one, it's a scam.
00:07:32.480 Her past has become your past.
00:07:33.980 No one's saying he has no right to call her names. 0.99
00:07:37.500 Like, oh, you are a H-O-E and you are a S-L-U-T and you are... 1.00
00:07:41.120 No, no, no, no, no. 0.99
00:07:41.820 That is haram.
00:07:42.860 You are not allowed to say that.
00:07:44.060 You are not allowed to say that.
00:07:44.380 Because she may have repented, even if she didn't.
00:07:46.000 You are not allowed to say that.
00:07:48.020 However, am I right or wrong to say that he has a right to divorce?
00:07:53.160 Now, sisters are going to say, well, it's her past. 0.99
00:07:55.100 Now, let's reverse the roles.
00:07:56.220 Now, tell me if I'm wrong, my wife and my dear sisters.
00:07:59.560 Let's change this up a bit.
00:08:00.440 Let's add some spice. 0.94
00:08:01.620 Let's add some herbs in this.
00:08:02.480 You know, some masala, yeah?
00:08:03.340 Some salt, yeah?
00:08:04.640 Salt bae.
00:08:05.160 Now, what if, what if she found out that he has a second wife? 0.99
00:08:12.380 Or, should we say, three months or six months into the marriage, he says, I want to, I want a second wife. 0.97
00:08:19.640 Yeah?
00:08:20.240 Okay.
00:08:20.780 And by the way, you've got the back.
00:08:21.460 You can write on the back as well, yeah?
00:08:22.340 Because my wife is writing a poem right now, yeah?
00:08:24.100 So, what if he, she found out and went through his iCloud?
00:08:27.900 Would you guys be saying, oh, why did she go through his iCloud?
00:08:30.960 And you'd be like, no, you go, girl. 0.98
00:08:33.520 You go, girl.
00:08:35.300 Woo! 0.99
00:08:36.200 You go, girl.
00:08:37.080 Slay the day, babe.
00:08:39.680 Tell me if I'm wrong, yeah?
00:08:40.820 You're laughing at me, yeah?
00:08:41.940 So, the point is what? 0.97
00:08:43.500 You say, oh, damn right she did. 0.97
00:08:45.540 He went and did what? 0.96
00:08:47.760 It's not haram, it's halal.
00:08:48.840 And, oh, and what if she'd done a post and said, by the way, I have chosen to divorce him. 0.63
00:08:54.720 You girls would be like, celebration. 0.99
00:08:57.760 Yes, divorce is backside. 1.00
00:09:00.680 Hold on a second.
00:09:01.960 What happened to not judging him?
00:09:04.160 Because a man judges a woman by her past, and a woman judges a man by his future. 0.88
00:09:08.180 If she, okay, halfway, we've got stopped.
00:09:12.340 Ladies first.
00:09:13.920 A woman should be, a woman shouldn't be exposing her sin, especially if she's repeated it, repented. 0.99
00:09:20.880 At her own accord, she can tell her husband if she wants but wouldn't advise, as is exposing the sins.
00:09:27.580 Correct.
00:09:28.700 So, some of, by the way, have you heard my second wife thing that I just mentioned?
00:09:32.360 I need you to comment on that if it's possible, yeah?
00:09:34.140 Correct.
00:09:34.820 You shouldn't expose your sins unless a man says, look, this is what I'm looking for.
00:09:38.500 I would like a virgin wife. 1.00
00:09:39.840 Then you try to divert that by saying, okay, you know, we're not compatible.
00:09:43.200 Okay, that is his right.
00:09:44.800 But the point I'm seeing is the following, my dear sisters and brothers, is that if the roles were reversed,
00:09:50.560 if the roles were reversed for a man, he cares about his wife's past.
00:09:55.000 A woman cares about his future. 0.66
00:09:56.720 Meaning, is there going to be another woman? 0.99
00:09:58.720 Is he going to get married again?
00:10:00.720 Why is it that when a man rejects a woman because she has a past, and that's what matters to him,
00:10:06.380 he is blamed as, how do you judge him?
00:10:08.260 Only God can judge her, etc. 0.94
00:10:09.560 Judgment is different.
00:10:10.620 He cannot accuse and call her names.
00:10:12.340 But he has a right to say, no, thank you.
00:10:15.520 Not for me.
00:10:16.320 But, if a woman was to be getting to know a man, and he said, I plan on getting married again, 0.55
00:10:23.100 not a single one of you sisters will come and say, oh, she's wrong for that. 1.00
00:10:29.140 No, you say, damn right. 0.96
00:10:30.640 Thank God. 0.95
00:10:31.740 Why the double standards?
00:10:33.100 Am I wrong?
00:10:33.620 Please, I want you to please address that if I'm wrong, yeah?
00:10:36.420 And the same thing.
00:10:37.560 He found out about her past and decided to maybe end the marriage.
00:10:40.940 Why is he wrong?
00:10:41.960 Now, personally, I would say if there's kids involved, etc.
00:10:44.280 Ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to aid you and help you to overcome it. 1.00
00:10:47.120 With this situation, it is so close.
00:10:48.980 And this is the reason why it can be worse for a woman who commits zina. 0.91
00:10:53.400 Why?
00:10:53.760 Not in the sharia. 0.88
00:10:54.340 The sharia is the same. 0.99
00:10:55.040 The punishment is the same.
00:10:55.920 The capture punishment is the same.
00:10:56.900 In the hereafter, it's the same.
00:10:57.860 However, she could have easily ascribed that child that she said, I want to have his babies
00:11:02.960 to his, to her current husband.
00:11:05.360 This is why a woman is capable of doing that and a man is not. 1.00
00:11:08.940 That's why zina being done by a woman can be consequentially in the sense of the world 1.00
00:11:13.800 be greater.
00:11:16.380 Tell me if I'm wrong.
00:11:18.340 Polygamy should be discussed prior marriage. 0.75
00:11:21.200 So a woman is aware, especially if it's a deal breaker for the sisters.
00:11:26.280 A woman should have a choice. 1.00
00:11:28.340 A polygamy and sunnah choice is not fard. 0.98
00:11:30.960 I agree.
00:11:31.820 But the point I'm saying is the following.
00:11:33.980 What if this was reversed and that she, he found, she found out that he has a second
00:11:40.160 wife or wants a second wife. 0.99
00:11:42.600 Would anyone or when she went through his phone and found out that he has a second wife, would
00:11:47.560 the sisters would be, be as outraged?
00:11:50.360 Yes or no, please.
00:11:51.180 I'm asking you this.
00:11:51.860 I'm going to ask my wife this question. 0.83
00:11:53.800 Listen to me again.
00:11:54.620 Did you hear me?
00:11:55.040 If the roles were reversed, if the roles were reversed and the sister went through his
00:12:02.420 eye cloud, found that he has a second wife or got a second wife and wanted divorce, would
00:12:09.460 any sister blame her or would they back her up? 0.85
00:12:12.500 So would they blame her or would they back her up?
00:12:15.540 I want to hear, I want to see your answer.
00:12:17.200 I'm very intrigued.
00:12:18.300 Again, look, Allah says in the Quran, speak the truth even if it's against yourself.
00:12:22.040 What would the sister say?
00:12:26.160 They'll back her up.
00:12:27.620 And I appreciate and value your honesty.
00:12:29.680 Thank you.
00:12:30.020 May Allah bless and preserve you.
00:12:31.340 That is the point I'm saying, guys.
00:12:32.780 Let's just be consistent.
00:12:34.280 A sister has a right to reject a brother if he wants to get married again. 0.99
00:12:38.500 That is her Islamic choice. 0.99
00:12:40.600 However, again, the same thing with a man.
00:12:44.640 If he hears that his wife has slept with 10 different men, he has a right to say, not
00:12:51.600 for me.
00:12:52.540 You cannot blame him or have a go at him.
00:12:55.940 That's why that's the double standards that I wanted to point out.
00:12:59.200 And brothers and sisters, in this situation, it is really hard for a man when he finds out
00:13:03.200 his wife has a past and it's really hard for a woman if she finds out that her husband
00:13:07.720 wants a second wife or third wife or fourth wife for that matter. 0.65
00:13:10.680 However, with Allah, all things are possible.
00:13:13.700 Ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and say, oh my Lord, this is heavy on my heart.
00:13:17.560 This is destroying me.
00:13:18.860 Shaytan's giving me waswasa to the man.
00:13:21.000 This is why I think that guy did this to your wife. 0.53
00:13:24.000 Or the man, oh, look, he's got married again.
00:13:26.800 He doesn't love you.
00:13:27.960 Ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala's guidance. 0.99
00:13:29.380 For Allah, all things are possible.
00:13:30.960 And in Surah Talaq, it's talking about divorce.
00:13:33.140 Allah says in the Quran, if you fear me, Allah will give you a way out from places you can
00:13:37.580 never imagine.
00:13:38.740 Anything else you'd like to say?
00:13:41.320 No?
00:13:42.060 I thank you for your contributions.
00:13:43.460 May Allah bless you for your honesty.
00:13:45.020 Brothers and sisters, inshallah.
00:13:45.980 Again, this is a new series that I started talking about this issue because we don't
00:13:50.760 want divorces to happen. 1.00
00:13:51.820 I don't want divorce to happen.
00:13:52.920 My wife doesn't want it. 1.00
00:13:53.920 We hear this story is left, right, center.
00:13:55.820 And again, I'm not here to show you my lifestyle, my private, nothing to do with you.
00:13:59.740 I'm only having my wife's contributions and at, with her permission that I've asked
00:14:03.860 because she does not want to be on social media at all.
00:14:06.440 And I believe it's very important.
00:14:08.480 She's my wife.
00:14:09.080 Who else am I going to bring here?
00:14:10.040 Okay.
00:14:10.580 The point is that she agreed to come and voice opinions via the whiteboard, inshallah.
00:14:14.920 May Allah bless and preserve everyone's marriage and protect our marriages from harm.
00:14:19.040 May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala allow us to be reunited in general with my wife, you guys
00:14:24.040 with your wife or your wives, whatever you want to do for that matter, yeah?
00:14:27.740 I mean, inshallah, till next time, brothers and sisters, if you would like us to react
00:14:30.760 to more situations pertaining to marital issues, et cetera, we would, inshallah, be honored
00:14:35.760 to do that, inshallah.
00:14:36.860 And yeah, this is so far I'm going to carry on if I see people benefit from it.
00:14:40.200 But again, I can change my mind and all of these videos might be deleted for whatever
00:14:44.560 reason, inshallah.
00:14:45.340 But yeah, that's all I want to say.
00:14:46.500 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.