Ali Dawah - November 19, 2014


THE REALITY 8 ｜｜ Can Men & women just be friends？？


Episode Stats

Length

18 minutes

Words per Minute

196.75546

Word Count

3,683

Sentence Count

5

Misogynist Sentences

34

Hate Speech Sentences

39


Summary

Can male and females be just friends? Is it possible for a male and female to only be friends if there is no attraction between them, or can there be more than just friends between a man and a woman?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Asalaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh brothers and sisters
00:00:28.860 Welcome to Reality 8
00:00:30.120 On this part we're going to show can male and females just be friends
00:00:33.120 Can they Musa?
00:00:34.380 Yeah
00:00:34.640 I don't think so
00:00:35.900 So we're going to see
00:00:37.100 Obviously I'm joking guys before you start
00:00:39.000 You're talking that crazy
00:00:40.160 So the Reality Show as you know is sponsored by Pure Matrimony
00:00:43.840 The Most Halal website that's been spoken by many chefs and scholars out there who recommend it
00:00:51.100 So inshallah do check it out
00:00:52.280 It's the Most Halal way to find a partner
00:00:53.700 Check the links below
00:00:54.720 So let's go straight into it and see what the females have to say
00:00:58.860 We'll be right back
00:01:00.440 Do you believe male and females can only be friends?
00:01:03.380 Yes of course
00:01:04.000 Have you ever had male friends?
00:01:06.040 Yes
00:01:06.420 Has any of them been attracted to you and wanted to be more than friends?
00:01:10.200 Some but not all
00:01:11.220 Do you think male and females can only be friends? Nothing more?
00:01:16.120 I don't think so
00:01:17.180 Why?
00:01:17.480 I don't know
00:01:21.020 I think it's an experience
00:01:22.980 And I met a lot of boys
00:01:25.520 And I wanted to be friends
00:01:27.500 But it just can't
00:01:28.940 Yes of course
00:01:30.840 They can?
00:01:31.740 Yeah
00:01:32.340 Did you ever have a friend
00:01:34.180 That was just a friend but he liked you?
00:01:37.280 Yes
00:01:37.660 It happened
00:01:38.580 Does that mean they can still be friends?
00:01:41.680 It's difficult because if there is one person that likes the other one
00:01:48.240 It can be confusing after
00:01:50.100 Can they just be friends? Nothing more?
00:01:52.320 Yeah
00:01:52.540 They can
00:01:53.260 Have you ever had an experience where you saw a guy as a friend
00:01:57.840 But he wanted to be more than friends?
00:01:59.740 Yeah I have
00:02:00.260 So if you've been through that
00:02:02.260 Doesn't that show like they can't really be friends?
00:02:04.420 Okay
00:02:04.600 Do you believe male and females can only be friends?
00:02:08.260 Yes
00:02:08.600 Yeah
00:02:09.320 I do
00:02:10.060 Yeah
00:02:10.400 Okay
00:02:11.060 Why?
00:02:12.120 Because if a girl and a girl can be friends why can't a guy and a girl?
00:02:15.560 Do you believe male and females can only be friends? Nothing more?
00:02:19.220 No they can't
00:02:19.940 Why not?
00:02:21.460 Because once they start hanging out they create a bond
00:02:24.640 Can male and female be just friends?
00:02:27.080 Yeah
00:02:27.500 Do you think male and females can only be friends?
00:02:30.580 Only be friends?
00:02:31.880 Well they can be
00:02:33.100 Yeah yeah
00:02:33.640 Just friends?
00:02:34.420 Yeah just friends
00:02:35.120 Yeah that's possible
00:02:35.940 Okay
00:02:36.360 Yeah
00:02:36.920 Yeah I've got loads of male friends
00:02:38.560 If there's no attraction there then there's
00:02:40.100 What if they get attracted?
00:02:43.060 Yeah
00:02:43.460 Okay
00:02:43.960 Yeah
00:02:44.460 Yeah
00:02:45.460 Yeah
00:02:45.760 Of course
00:02:46.980 What about you?
00:02:48.020 Yeah
00:02:48.320 What about you?
00:02:49.060 Yeah
00:02:49.240 Yeah
00:02:49.440 It depends
00:02:50.980 Yeah they can be friends
00:02:52.060 Yeah
00:02:52.720 Yeah
00:02:53.020 Yeah
00:02:53.520 So Moussa
00:02:55.900 Tell me what you think about what just happened
00:02:58.720 Like we saw what the females are saying
00:03:01.300 They're just clearly saying you know what
00:03:02.460 Even though some said
00:03:03.500 No they can't be friends
00:03:04.900 But most of them were like yeah there's nothing wrong
00:03:06.540 They can be friends
00:03:07.160 I think we should see what the men say
00:03:09.860 Yeah I thought that's a good idea
00:03:10.700 Let's go see what the males say
00:03:11.780 Because the females think
00:03:12.880 They say maybe we got it wrong
00:03:14.160 Let's see what the males are about to say
00:03:16.160 Do you think male and females can only be friends?
00:03:18.880 Nothing more
00:03:19.500 No
00:03:19.880 No
00:03:21.040 Naturally
00:03:22.040 It's not possible
00:03:23.120 It's not possible
00:03:23.960 No
00:03:25.180 They can't
00:03:26.120 No
00:03:26.680 No
00:03:27.580 I believe there's always
00:03:28.900 Was that a no sorry?
00:03:30.940 It was a no
00:03:31.440 Can I carry on?
00:03:33.580 Yeah
00:03:33.800 There's always inside
00:03:35.020 There's always feelings there
00:03:36.240 That will make it more than friendship
00:03:37.540 Okay
00:03:38.260 So have you ever gone through that experience?
00:03:40.040 No
00:03:40.480 You haven't?
00:03:41.220 Are you sure?
00:03:41.620 No
00:03:42.160 I'm joking I have yes
00:03:43.540 Okay
00:03:44.580 If that's the case then
00:03:45.380 How could male and female just be friends?
00:03:46.620 Because you've got friends
00:03:47.520 But you're saying
00:03:48.020 If I had the chance I'll go out with her
00:03:50.120 Well for me I've got self control still
00:03:52.660 So for me you know
00:03:54.460 But you do feel attracted
00:03:55.900 Yeah but
00:03:57.360 If she's my friend
00:03:59.860 She's my friend you know what I mean
00:04:01.280 Okay have you ever had
00:04:02.400 A feeling towards a friend
00:04:03.800 That's just a female
00:04:04.460 But
00:04:04.820 That like
00:04:05.880 Has feelings of cure?
00:04:07.180 Friend zone
00:04:07.720 Friend zone
00:04:09.820 Yeah
00:04:10.360 Or like
00:04:11.380 Yeah do you ever have
00:04:13.560 A feeling towards a friend
00:04:14.580 That you follow?
00:04:15.220 No of course
00:04:15.920 I'm going to tell you
00:04:16.700 They've never been in a situation
00:04:17.780 Like that before
00:04:18.480 Because then obviously
00:04:19.140 At that point
00:04:19.840 Yeah
00:04:20.180 You realise
00:04:20.980 I lost cause
00:04:21.860 Yeah
00:04:22.400 So
00:04:22.880 Okay
00:04:23.360 If she
00:04:23.880 Alright
00:04:24.200 She saw you just
00:04:25.260 As a friend
00:04:25.840 Yeah
00:04:26.020 Yeah
00:04:26.380 But obviously
00:04:27.300 You
00:04:27.840 Have
00:04:28.380 There's been
00:04:28.800 Has there been moments
00:04:29.340 Where you said
00:04:29.780 Okay
00:04:30.000 If I had the chance
00:04:31.360 I would go out with her
00:04:32.320 Definitely
00:04:32.540 Yeah
00:04:33.040 Yeah definitely
00:04:33.400 Look guys
00:04:34.120 It happens
00:04:34.940 You think about it
00:04:36.320 If you had the chance
00:04:37.780 Would you go out with her?
00:04:40.140 Definitely
00:04:40.660 Yes
00:04:41.320 I would do it
00:04:42.240 She's awesome
00:04:43.000 Okay
00:04:43.620 Come on
00:04:44.340 What would I do it?
00:04:46.200 Let's go
00:04:47.000 You cool
00:04:47.760 Dude you're not recording right?
00:04:50.040 I can see how you can get them
00:04:51.380 Feel it
00:04:51.860 You can
00:04:52.600 Yeah
00:04:52.940 Here's the condition
00:04:54.160 If the girl is not hard
00:04:55.320 Rob you're drunk
00:04:56.380 Let's go
00:04:57.200 If she's not hard
00:04:58.600 Yeah
00:04:58.880 If she's hard
00:04:59.880 Definitely
00:05:00.500 Get water
00:05:02.040 It's not going to happen
00:05:03.420 Okay
00:05:04.360 Do you believe
00:05:04.960 Male and females
00:05:05.520 Can only be friends?
00:05:07.280 Yeah
00:05:07.540 Have you ever had
00:05:08.760 Female friends?
00:05:09.920 Of course
00:05:10.220 Okay
00:05:10.800 Have you ever been
00:05:11.460 Attracted to them?
00:05:12.640 Of course
00:05:12.920 Yeah
00:05:13.180 Does that mean
00:05:14.060 Can they be friends though?
00:05:15.020 Because you're saying
00:05:15.420 You had female friends
00:05:16.460 But you was attracted to them
00:05:17.800 Of course
00:05:18.800 Can they still be friends?
00:05:19.800 Can male and females just be friends?
00:05:20.800 Yes definitely
00:05:21.800 Have you ever had a female friend that you was attracted to?
00:05:22.800 Yes
00:05:23.800 Does that mean can they be friends?
00:05:24.800 Yes
00:05:25.800 Does that mean can they be friends?
00:05:26.800 Now brothers and sisters
00:05:27.800 We'll see what the females had to say
00:05:29.800 Now the males it clearly contradicts what the females are saying
00:05:32.800 Completely
00:05:33.800 Completely
00:05:34.800 Completely
00:05:35.800 So they're like you know what
00:05:36.800 No it won't be
00:05:37.800 Even that guy
00:05:38.800 Remember that guy
00:05:39.800 With that girl
00:05:40.800 Yeah
00:05:41.800 Where he's like
00:05:42.800 I said to him if you had the chance would you go out with him?
00:05:43.800 He's like hell yeah
00:05:44.800 Of course I'll go out with him
00:05:45.800 Yes
00:05:46.800 Yes
00:05:47.800 Yes
00:05:48.800 Have you ever been attracted to them?
00:05:49.800 Yes
00:05:50.800 Have you ever been attracted to them?
00:05:51.800 Of course
00:05:52.800 Can they still be friends?
00:05:53.800 Can male and female just be friends?
00:05:54.800 Yes definitely
00:05:55.800 Have you ever had a female friend that you was attracted to?
00:05:56.800 Yes
00:05:57.800 Does that mean can they be friends?
00:05:58.800 Now brothers and sisters
00:05:59.800 We'll see what the females had to say
00:06:00.800 Now the males
00:06:01.800 It clearly contradicts what the females are saying
00:06:02.800 Completely
00:06:03.800 Completely
00:06:04.800 Completely
00:06:05.800 So they're like you know what
00:06:06.800 No it won't be
00:06:07.800 Even that guy
00:06:08.800 Of course I'll go out with him
00:06:09.800 So you know what
00:06:10.800 This shows
00:06:11.800 This shows that there's
00:06:12.800 A conflict of interest here
00:06:13.800 Exactly
00:06:14.800 And that's why that girl walked off
00:06:15.800 She's like oh my god
00:06:16.800 I can't believe what he said
00:06:17.800 I think we should go into the scientific study
00:06:19.800 Let's check out the studies
00:06:20.800 And see what the studies say inshallah
00:06:22.800 Men and women
00:06:23.800 Can just be friends
00:06:25.800 Assuming that they're both heterosexual in this case
00:06:27.800 Appears to be not true
00:06:29.800 This is fascinating
00:06:31.800 They did a study
00:06:32.800 Where they brought in 88 pairs
00:06:35.800 Of undergraduate opposite sex friends
00:06:38.800 Into a science lab
00:06:39.800 And they followed standard protocol
00:06:42.800 As far as anonymity
00:06:44.800 Confidentiality etc
00:06:45.800 But also got people to agree verbally
00:06:47.800 And in front of each other
00:06:48.800 That they weren't going to discuss the study
00:06:50.800 They weren't going to talk about
00:06:51.800 What they said to the researchers
00:06:53.800 Amongst themselves
00:06:54.800 After leaving the testing facility
00:06:56.800 What they tested was
00:06:57.800 Presumably you were just friends
00:06:59.800 And they separated the op the men
00:07:01.800 And the man and the woman
00:07:02.800 They said okay
00:07:03.800 Tell me
00:07:04.800 Do you have any
00:07:05.800 How attractive do you find your friend to be?
00:07:07.800 How attractive do you think your friend finds you to be?
00:07:11.800 How interested in pursuing a relationship with your friend are you?
00:07:14.800 Okay
00:07:15.800 What do you think they found?
00:07:16.800 You tell me
00:07:19.800 Okay
00:07:20.800 The results show that there is a huge gender difference
00:07:24.800 The women did not find on the whole
00:07:27.800 The men to be particularly attractive
00:07:29.800 And had absolutely no inkling that they would ever have a romantic relationship with the men
00:07:33.800 However
00:07:34.800 The men
00:07:35.800 Number one
00:07:36.800 Found the women attractive
00:07:37.800 Number two
00:07:38.800 Had a much higher
00:07:39.800 Estimation of how attractive the women found them to be
00:07:42.800 And also indicated
00:07:44.800 Yeah I would actually be into having a romantic relationship with this woman
00:07:48.800 So the results really seem to indicate that
00:07:51.800 Men have the harder time being just friends
00:07:54.800 Whereas for women
00:07:55.800 It really appears to be much more straight forward to be just friends
00:07:59.800 So Musa can you just quickly summarize it for us
00:08:02.800 From an Islamic perspective
00:08:03.800 Because obviously we've seen the studies
00:08:05.800 What the people think
00:08:06.800 Obviously what does the Quran and Sunnah say about this matter of course
00:08:08.800 So
00:08:10.800 Obviously living in our normal day to day lives
00:08:13.800 If we think about it from a woman's perspective
00:08:15.800 Yeah
00:08:16.800 And even from a man's perspective
00:08:17.800 Yeah
00:08:18.800 You know
00:08:19.800 Without adding any sense of manliness to it
00:08:20.800 Let's say I'm just a normal person
00:08:22.800 Yeah
00:08:23.800 I've got no sort of inclination
00:08:24.800 I'm just a normal guy
00:08:25.800 Who's living my life
00:08:27.800 I would think
00:08:30.800 Why can't I be friends with a female?
00:08:32.800 I mean what's wrong with it?
00:08:33.800 Exactly
00:08:34.800 You know
00:08:35.800 Like what's the issue here?
00:08:36.800 And this is exactly the kind of mindset the females have on this
00:08:39.800 Yeah
00:08:40.800 What's wrong with it?
00:08:41.800 Where's the harm?
00:08:42.800 There's no issue
00:08:43.800 Because they have no sense of inclination
00:08:45.800 Towards the man like that
00:08:46.800 If they see him as a friend
00:08:47.800 He's a friend
00:08:48.800 And that's it
00:08:49.800 Yeah
00:08:50.800 That's why we have this whole time of being friend-zoned
00:08:52.800 Yeah
00:08:53.800 It's when a female doesn't want to be more than just a friend
00:08:55.800 So she just wants to stay with you
00:08:57.800 You know you stay there
00:08:58.800 Sorry sorry that's true
00:08:59.800 It's like saying friend-zoned
00:09:00.800 Because when we think about friend-zoned
00:09:01.800 Yeah
00:09:02.800 We never think a girl ends up in the friend-zoned
00:09:03.800 We always have this perception of this man
00:09:04.800 So with the guy
00:09:05.800 Yeah
00:09:06.800 Go ahead
00:09:07.800 And this
00:09:08.800 The reason for that is because
00:09:09.800 The woman always has this perception
00:09:11.800 But the guy you see
00:09:12.800 The guy has agendas
00:09:13.800 A lot of the time
00:09:14.800 So
00:09:15.800 I mean if you were to ask
00:09:17.800 Any of the people that you're friends with
00:09:19.800 If you're a girl
00:09:20.800 Obviously don't literally do it
00:09:21.800 Because of course fit
00:09:22.800 But
00:09:23.800 You go out to him and be like
00:09:24.800 Yeah
00:09:25.800 If you go out to him and be like
00:09:26.800 Yo you know would you ever go out with me
00:09:28.800 Probably say yeah
00:09:29.800 That's probably the main reason
00:09:31.800 Why he's following you around
00:09:32.800 The reason why he asks you the questions
00:09:35.800 Of all of the people in the world he could ask
00:09:37.800 The reason why he approaches you
00:09:39.800 Is because he has this sense of attraction in him
00:09:41.800 And
00:09:42.800 In no way am I saying
00:09:43.800 Oh all men are pervs
00:09:45.800 All of your mates are pervs
00:09:46.800 All of your mates have these agendas in their heads
00:09:49.800 That they just want to get you
00:09:50.800 You know into their room
00:09:51.800 And into you know their bed
00:09:52.800 Or something like that
00:09:53.800 No
00:09:54.800 It's nothing like that
00:09:55.800 I'm not saying that
00:09:56.800 But what I'm saying is that
00:09:57.800 In the Quran
00:09:58.800 Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala specifically mentions
00:10:00.800 That the plot of shaytan is daif
00:10:03.800 But for the man
00:10:04.800 The plot of the woman is azim
00:10:06.800 It's strong
00:10:07.800 Now I'm not comparing the shaytan to a woman
00:10:09.800 Of course
00:10:10.800 No of course not
00:10:11.800 You know
00:10:12.800 Yeah yeah
00:10:13.800 Some of our greatest examples are women
00:10:14.800 You know
00:10:15.800 Marim a.s.
00:10:16.800 Asya a.s.
00:10:17.800 So we have these examples of women
00:10:19.800 But the reason why
00:10:20.800 Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says this in the Quran
00:10:22.800 Is because of the kind of effect women have on us
00:10:25.800 It's the kind of effect they have
00:10:27.800 So the way we are created
00:10:28.800 It's the way that we are created
00:10:29.800 Because Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says
00:10:30.800 One of the biggest fitness for men is women
00:10:32.800 Yes
00:10:33.800 And the Prophet sallallahu wa ta'ala said the same thing
00:10:35.800 Exactly
00:10:36.800 And now
00:10:37.800 How does Islam approach this?
00:10:38.800 It's very very interesting
00:10:40.800 You see
00:10:41.800 We can get attracted to a friend
00:10:44.800 To a female friend
00:10:45.800 Let's say
00:10:46.800 We can get attracted to her
00:10:47.800 And we want to make it more
00:10:48.800 Yeah
00:10:49.800 But
00:10:50.800 Islam completely stops it from going anywhere near there
00:10:52.800 By what?
00:10:53.800 By having this sense of
00:10:55.800 Brotherhood
00:10:56.800 Brotherhood
00:10:57.800 And sisterhood
00:10:58.800 In Islam
00:10:59.800 You see
00:11:00.800 What we are being told basically
00:11:03.800 Is that look
00:11:04.800 You would never think about your sister
00:11:07.800 In the way that you are thinking about this next girl
00:11:09.800 You would never eye up your sister
00:11:11.800 In the way you are eyeing up this next girl
00:11:13.800 You would never go up to your sister
00:11:15.800 And try and
00:11:16.800 You know
00:11:17.800 Get on her good side
00:11:18.800 The way that you are trying to do it to this girl
00:11:20.800 So treat her like your sister
00:11:22.800 This is why in Islam
00:11:24.800 Any other Muslim female
00:11:27.800 Is our sister
00:11:28.800 And we should treat her
00:11:29.800 As our sister
00:11:30.800 If she needs any sort of help
00:11:31.800 We should help her
00:11:32.800 In accordance to Islam of course
00:11:33.800 And this is the kind of mindset
00:11:35.800 That Allah is trying to put in us
00:11:38.800 You see
00:11:39.800 With all of this fitna going on
00:11:41.800 It's so important that we have this mindset
00:11:43.800 That we look at other females as our sisters
00:11:46.800 Even in humanity
00:11:47.800 Our sisters
00:11:48.800 And you know what kind of fitna this stops bro?
00:11:50.800 Yeah
00:11:51.800 You won't eye up another female
00:11:52.800 You won't
00:11:53.800 Men won't go around doing bad things like watching porn
00:11:56.800 Because would you ever watch a video
00:11:58.800 For example
00:11:59.800 Come on
00:12:00.800 My sister
00:12:01.800 Did you get me?
00:12:02.800 No way
00:12:03.800 So if you have this mindset
00:12:04.800 It stops you from going
00:12:05.800 Anywhere near
00:12:06.800 Zina
00:12:07.800 Anywhere near
00:12:08.800 Free mixing
00:12:09.800 Anywhere
00:12:10.800 It's a very valid point
00:12:11.800 Because you are like
00:12:12.800 Obviously you look at
00:12:13.800 Like your sister
00:12:14.800 Allah SWT says in the crowd
00:12:15.800 That you should not even go near Zina
00:12:16.800 So when we say
00:12:17.800 Oh they are just friends
00:12:19.800 You are opening that door
00:12:20.800 Because Allah SWT says
00:12:21.800 Don't even go there
00:12:22.800 But you are just saying
00:12:23.800 He is just my friend
00:12:24.800 And you know what the proof is
00:12:25.800 Opening that door
00:12:26.800 Yeah
00:12:27.800 What is he thinking?
00:12:28.800 Exactly
00:12:29.800 And that's why
00:12:30.800 This is a project
00:12:31.800 I really want to work on
00:12:32.800 Regarding reality shows
00:12:33.800 And I want you to be involved as well
00:12:34.800 It's basically
00:12:35.800 About
00:12:36.800 We hear about
00:12:37.800 Sisters
00:12:38.800 When they start practicing
00:12:39.800 Or whatever
00:12:40.800 They have these guys
00:12:41.800 Who spread rumours about them
00:12:42.800 Yeah
00:12:43.800 Why?
00:12:44.800 Because they try
00:12:45.800 To be
00:12:46.800 Go out with them
00:12:47.800 As you can see the guy said
00:12:48.800 Look
00:12:49.800 Sorry okay
00:12:50.800 So
00:12:51.800 So as you know
00:12:52.800 The guys go around
00:12:53.800 And spread rumours
00:12:54.800 And they say
00:12:55.800 This with her and that with her
00:12:56.800 Why does that occur?
00:12:57.800 Because
00:12:58.800 When a guy ends up in a friend zone
00:12:59.800 Some of them take it lightly
00:13:00.800 And say you know what?
00:13:01.800 It's okay
00:13:02.800 But what do some of them do?
00:13:03.800 They say nah
00:13:04.800 It hurts them
00:13:05.800 You want to be like that?
00:13:06.800 You want to be like that?
00:13:07.800 So what I'm going to do
00:13:08.800 Is I'm going to go around
00:13:09.800 And say you know what?
00:13:10.800 I did this to Sarah
00:13:11.800 Or I did this to Leila
00:13:12.800 Or I did this to whatever her name is
00:13:13.800 You get what I'm trying to say?
00:13:14.800 So they go around
00:13:15.800 And start spreading rumours
00:13:16.800 And these rumours
00:13:17.800 Can carry on
00:13:18.800 This is how certain men are
00:13:19.800 You know?
00:13:20.800 Unfortunately
00:13:21.800 I mean
00:13:22.800 We all just kind of heard about
00:13:23.800 These kind of stuff
00:13:24.800 So that's why
00:13:25.800 You get these
00:13:26.800 Brothers who go out there
00:13:27.800 And basically say
00:13:28.800 You know what?
00:13:29.800 I've done this with her
00:13:30.800 I've done that with her
00:13:31.800 Because why?
00:13:32.800 Because he's so affected
00:13:33.800 By him being in friend zone
00:13:34.800 So that's why
00:13:35.800 We need to understand
00:13:36.800 When Allah SWT
00:13:37.800 We go by the Qur'an and Sunnah
00:13:39.800 We've seen what
00:13:40.800 The people's opinions are
00:13:41.800 We've seen how
00:13:42.800 Certain cities are like
00:13:43.800 Yeah they can be friends
00:13:44.800 Some guys are saying
00:13:45.800 You know what?
00:13:46.800 No they can't be friends
00:13:47.800 Scientific studies show
00:13:48.800 That they can't
00:13:49.800 You know?
00:13:50.800 It doesn't happen
00:13:51.800 Now when it comes to the Qur'an
00:13:52.800 And Sunnah
00:13:53.800 That's what we rely upon
00:13:54.800 Because science changes
00:13:55.800 People's opinions change
00:13:56.800 But the Qur'an and Sunnah
00:13:57.800 Does not change
00:13:58.800 So that's why
00:13:59.800 We need to understand
00:14:00.800 Brothers and sisters
00:14:01.800 That look
00:14:02.800 Don't go there
00:14:03.800 You might just say
00:14:04.800 You know what?
00:14:05.800 He's just a friend
00:14:06.800 But believe me
00:14:07.800 When you're alone
00:14:08.800 You don't know
00:14:09.800 What's going through his head
00:14:10.800 So what we're just trying to say
00:14:11.800 Is look
00:14:12.800 Don't even go there
00:14:13.800 He's a friend
00:14:14.800 He doesn't see you like that
00:14:15.800 But he doesn't see you like that
00:14:16.800 But he's plotting and planning in his head
00:14:18.800 Exactly
00:14:19.800 It's like that
00:14:20.800 Most guys back in the days
00:14:21.800 Like oh no
00:14:22.800 Guys
00:14:23.800 They'll approach a certain girl
00:14:24.800 And be like look
00:14:25.800 Can I have your number?
00:14:26.800 No, no, no
00:14:27.800 I've got a boyfriend
00:14:28.800 You know what he'll say?
00:14:29.800 We can just be friends
00:14:30.800 Because he knows
00:14:31.800 Once he gets there
00:14:32.800 He can work his way up
00:14:33.800 How?
00:14:34.800 By building trust
00:14:35.800 It's true though isn't it?
00:14:36.800 You know what I'm trying to say?
00:14:37.800 So that's why
00:14:38.800 We need to be careful
00:14:39.800 Yeah
00:14:40.800 I mean that's pretty much it
00:14:41.800 Specifically for the sisters
00:14:42.800 This should be
00:14:44.800 A sign for you to be careful
00:14:46.800 Yeah
00:14:47.800 You know?
00:14:48.800 A lot of sisters have this mindset where
00:14:49.800 Oh, for example
00:14:50.800 They might see what we're saying as extreme
00:14:52.800 Like what are you saying?
00:14:53.800 The hell
00:14:54.800 We can't even be friends
00:14:55.800 Yeah
00:14:56.800 You have to understand something
00:14:57.800 You're a female
00:14:58.800 You'll never be a male
00:14:59.800 Yeah
00:15:00.800 You'll never have this sort of feelings that we have
00:15:02.800 And if we're telling you straight
00:15:04.800 That it will be difficult
00:15:06.800 Yeah
00:15:07.800 For you to be a friend
00:15:08.800 With a guy who's actually attracted to you
00:15:10.800 Yeah
00:15:11.800 That's it
00:15:12.800 Yeah, exactly
00:15:13.800 Yeah
00:15:14.800 So what you said was right
00:15:15.800 Now what what
00:15:16.800 What makes me
00:15:17.800 What is really sad is this
00:15:18.800 Yeah
00:15:19.800 Is if we came just with the Quran and Sunnah
00:15:20.800 Yeah
00:15:21.800 A lot of brothers and sisters
00:15:22.800 And certain people out there
00:15:23.800 Who don't know about Istanbul
00:15:24.800 Like what the hell
00:15:25.800 All these kind of stuff
00:15:26.800 But when we come with the male perspective
00:15:28.800 The female perspective
00:15:29.800 And what the scientific studies show
00:15:31.800 You know we live in the age of science
00:15:32.800 Everyone would have took it and be like
00:15:34.800 Yeah that's right
00:15:35.800 This is what science shows
00:15:36.800 But if we came with the Quran and Sunnah
00:15:37.800 You'd be like it's extreme
00:15:38.800 So do you see that
00:15:39.800 It's really sad
00:15:40.800 You need to understand that
00:15:41.800 When Allah orders something for you
00:15:43.800 He orders for the best
00:15:44.800 You know
00:15:45.800 So that's what we need to understand
00:15:46.800 The importance of that
00:15:49.800 Brother Faizul MashaAllah
00:15:50.800 As you can see he's hench
00:15:51.800 He's took all my arm out
00:15:52.800 Aki
00:15:53.800 Do you think male and females can just be friends?
00:15:55.800 Nothing more?
00:15:56.800 No, never
00:15:57.800 They can't be in it
00:15:58.800 Tell them
00:15:59.800 Please tell them
00:16:00.800 Because we showed them the male perspective
00:16:01.800 The female perspective
00:16:02.800 The studies
00:16:03.800 The Quran and Sunnah
00:16:04.800 But they're still not listening Aki
00:16:05.800 Bismillah
00:16:08.800 I'm talking from 30 years of experience
00:16:11.800 I'm a little bit older than Yuzla
00:16:13.800 It doesn't really work
00:16:15.800 I mean if you think back to school
00:16:18.800 You know year 11, 12 onwards
00:16:20.800 Sixth form
00:16:21.800 College
00:16:22.800 University
00:16:23.800 The way things happen
00:16:24.800 Between the opposite sexes
00:16:26.800 Exactly
00:16:27.800 It's never just about friendship
00:16:28.800 Never
00:16:29.800 Unless the guy's gay
00:16:31.800 Or there's some problem
00:16:32.800 Exactly
00:16:33.800 That's what the studies show as well
00:16:34.800 The study show
00:16:35.800 Look
00:16:36.800 They can't
00:16:37.800 But look there's studies
00:16:39.800 That show that
00:16:40.800 It can't happen
00:16:41.800 I mean obviously the best guidance
00:16:42.800 Is the guidance of the Prophet
00:16:43.800 Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam
00:16:44.800 You know the Quran
00:16:46.800 That he revealed
00:16:47.800 Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala revealed to us
00:16:48.800 If we stick to that
00:16:49.800 We will find that men and women
00:16:50.800 Shouldn't really be friends
00:16:51.800 Allah has given us the solution
00:16:53.800 You know the Prophet
00:16:54.800 Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said
00:16:55.800 We should marry young
00:16:56.800 Parents should advise their children
00:16:58.800 And try and allow their children
00:16:59.800 To marry as young as possible
00:17:00.800 And make it easy for them
00:17:01.800 And not be obstacles and barriers in their path
00:17:03.800 To lead them to sin
00:17:05.800 You know they should try and
00:17:06.800 And I'm speaking as a father as well
00:17:08.800 You know what it's good
00:17:09.800 Because look like I said
00:17:10.800 Cut it there yet?
00:17:12.800 Cut it there but we don't want a sermon bro
00:17:14.800 No no no no
00:17:15.800 Like I said look
00:17:16.800 I've got a phone call as well
00:17:17.800 No problem take a call
00:17:18.800 We showed you the female's perspective
00:17:19.800 Male's perspective
00:17:20.800 The studies, Quran and Sunnah
00:17:22.800 And we've got an experienced person
00:17:23.800 Who is married and he's telling you
00:17:24.800 What else do you need?
00:17:25.800 That's it
00:17:30.800 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh
00:17:32.800 Brothers and sisters
00:17:33.800 Welcome back
00:17:35.800 Now as you know
00:17:36.800 Start again
00:17:41.800 Unity
00:17:44.800 Sunshine
00:17:46.800 I like leather
00:17:48.800 And today as you can see
00:17:49.800 I'm dressed as a
00:17:51.800 The couch
00:17:52.800 Okay guys
00:17:53.800 Now we've seen
00:17:54.800 What the females have got to say
00:17:55.800 We've seen
00:18:00.800 So Imran do you think
00:18:02.800 Oh damn he's having a film
00:18:06.800 Imran do you think
00:18:07.800 Male and females can just be friends?
00:18:09.800 Why not?
00:18:12.800 Can they be friends or not?
00:18:13.800 I'll give you a quick perspective
00:18:14.800 Of course not
00:18:15.800 That's like saying
00:18:16.800 It's gonna be in the vlog
00:18:17.800 That's like saying
00:18:18.800 Can a crackhead
00:18:19.800 Be friends with a crack dealer?
00:18:20.800 So they can't be
00:18:22.800 Sorry this is fine
00:18:23.800 Is that a good man?
00:18:24.800 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:18:25.800 Oh
00:18:35.800 Let's meet you
00:18:37.800 No
00:18:40.800 What?
00:18:41.800 To help me
00:18:42.760 To help me