Ali Dawah - WHO BELONGS IN THE KITCHEN？ MEN OR WOMAN？ - EP 7 ｜｜ BITTER TRUTH SHOW

00:00:00.000 It's very, very important to invite people that you disagree with.

00:00:03.100 So it was you. I thought it was a troll account.

00:00:04.680 That was me.

00:00:05.240 That was me.

00:00:05.520 I thought it was a troll account.

00:00:06.400 Okay, let's go.

00:00:07.160 Thanks.

00:00:07.560 If you had gone onto the page, you would have known.

00:00:09.400 I'm so disappointed in you, sister.

00:00:10.960 Okay, one minute.

00:00:11.900 Go ahead.

00:00:12.240 I have my reasons.

00:00:13.480 He's advising the youngsters in the wrong way when the people are not married, the youngsters. 0.62

00:00:18.140 They're thinking about this guy.

00:00:19.360 I want to be like this guy. 0.99

00:00:20.260 I want to treat my wife as a slave. 1.00

00:00:21.940 We have to put him down. 1.00

00:00:23.080 He's a cancer to the umma. 0.99

00:00:24.500 No, he's a danger. 0.98

00:00:25.560 He does have followers.

00:00:26.960 I've never come across a secure man who gets female attention, who gets money, who

00:00:31.680 gets the things that are maybe make you a high value man.

00:00:34.260 Start speaking down on a woman like she's a piece of something on the floor.

00:00:37.960 There is no secure man that does this.

00:00:40.180 Who fears Allah and has taqwa. 0.99

00:00:42.460 At the same time, I think my question is, is why do people get so triggered?

00:00:45.700 Why do you value him so much?

00:00:47.180 What is it to you?

00:00:47.980 He's nothing.

00:00:49.200 I didn't come.

00:00:49.880 I was invited to come and comfort him and I refused.

00:00:52.800 I think a lot of modern day women, in my opinion, especially Western women with the 1.00

00:00:57.340 women here, white women, my people, they, they don't understand the value of being in 1.00

00:01:02.460 the kitchen. 0.94

00:01:03.080 I know that sounds, it's very, I know it's a very harsh.

00:01:05.500 As a white woman, I actually agree with that.

00:01:07.360 Because a lot of these Cardi B's of the world and all of these girls that we watch and listen

00:01:12.100 to and we look up to, they have an agenda to break us as women so that our men can't 1.00

00:01:18.640 tell us what to do.

00:01:19.580 When's the last time our wives helped out with our work? 1.00

00:01:21.280 Let's start a petition. 0.77

00:01:22.280 We're going to call ourselves the blue pill guys.

00:01:24.340 Why are our wives not helping us anymore? 1.00

00:01:26.220 Sisters will go ballistic. 1.00

00:01:28.160 We're trying to make a point here.

00:01:29.560 We do not ever complain about it.

00:01:32.020 Everyone's talking about toxic masculinity and no one talks about the toxic masculinity

00:01:37.440 in women.

00:01:38.600 Where is it?

00:01:39.080 No one talks about the toxic masculinity that we women are developing. 1.00

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00:02:04.920 As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi barakatuh.

00:02:06.480 Brothers and sisters and dear friends, hope you guys are well inshaAllah.

00:02:08.620 Before I start, I want to praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, the most merciful, the most just,

00:02:11.600 or praise His glory and gratitude belong to Him.

00:02:14.180 Before we start, I want to do some disclaimers.

00:02:15.860 So our last episode, which was pertaining to this very topic, kicked off for a variety

00:02:21.220 of reasons.

00:02:21.920 People were angry.

00:02:23.120 People were upset.

00:02:24.240 I just want to make a disclaimer as the host and someone that contributes to these discussions

00:02:27.920 is that I don't invite people here who I disagree with.

00:02:31.380 I want to make this very categorically clear.

00:02:32.560 If I brought everyone who I agree with, if I said, guys, does everyone like Apple?

00:02:36.520 And everyone said, yeah, we love Apple.

00:02:37.660 We love Apple.

00:02:38.560 There'll be no discussion.

00:02:39.600 There'll be just, everybody loves Apple.

00:02:41.060 Yeah? 0.84

00:02:41.120 So the point I'm saying is that I might invite somebody who is a, maybe a toxic feminist 1.00

00:02:45.460 who beats her husband up. 0.98

00:02:46.980 No problem.

00:02:47.640 It's what you're doing is wrong.

00:02:48.820 But I would like you to come here so I can challenge your views, understand you better,

00:02:51.780 and maybe change your mind about certain things.

00:02:54.260 So that's one disclaimer.

00:02:56.440 Secondly, there are people who are making some claims.

00:02:59.440 And I want to touch upon that as well, which is we are free mixing, meaning that the sisters

00:03:04.560 and our honorable sisters, by the way, and our brothers have come here to intermingle.

00:03:09.100 This is a slander.

00:03:09.820 I ask you to fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. 1.00

00:03:12.100 If you do not know your religion, please study your religion.

00:03:14.540 Yeah?

00:03:15.020 The sisters who come here, our honorable sisters, which is one of Barabah's sister, his wife,

00:03:20.240 our dear sister is here, to have her contributions as well.

00:03:23.160 So I ask you to fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala in your accusations and slander.

00:03:26.360 The Prophet Muhammad said, the one who guarantees what's between his lips and what's between 1.00

00:03:31.740 his legs, I will grant him paradise.

00:03:33.920 Do not make comments.

00:03:35.460 If you speak behind us, that's backbiting.

00:03:37.940 If what you're saying about it is not true, it's slander.

00:03:40.540 Our sisters come here for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

00:03:42.680 And the brothers who come here for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, we come here

00:03:46.340 so we can benefit you guys at home.

00:03:49.380 One of the biggest fitness of our ummah today is divorce.

00:03:52.420 People are getting divorced left, right, center.

00:03:55.400 Sister Soul deals with sisters.

00:03:56.820 I speak to brothers.

00:03:57.900 And I don't know you guys' experience.

00:03:58.980 But the point is, the reason I started this show is not for fame and views and money,

00:04:04.580 whatever it may be, yeah?

00:04:05.980 It is genuinely, inshallah, for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, 0.97

00:04:08.800 of how we can combat these things that the family units are going through.

00:04:12.600 We already have the LGBT and all these other madnesses attacking our family unit. 1.00

00:04:17.280 On top of that, we have divorces.

00:04:19.560 Since that disclaimer is out of the way, this is going to be a part two of our episode that we had,

00:04:25.020 which was very controversial.

00:04:26.000 There were things that were said that some people got upset about.

00:04:29.560 Obviously, he was challenged as well, which is Brother Mahdi.

00:04:32.300 I'm going to open the discussion.

00:04:33.620 The discussion was basically, should men cook and clean?

00:04:39.200 So when I say this, brothers and sisters, I know there is some people said,

00:04:42.580 for example, like Shaquille said on the last one.

00:04:44.960 By the way, and I need to give an explanation to that.

00:04:47.680 Shaquille, not that, by the way, I'm not vilifying Brother Mahdi.

00:04:50.520 We don't want to throw Brother Mahdi under the bus. 1.00

00:04:52.300 There were certain things I didn't know about him myself.

00:04:54.420 But Shaquille had no, he didn't, it's the first time you met him.

00:04:57.620 Yeah?

00:04:58.000 So which is my fault, because at the end of the day, not that you regret it or not,

00:05:01.380 but the point was that you was not aware.

00:05:03.360 Yeah?

00:05:03.900 So that's, inshallah, disclaimer, you can touch upon it more.

00:05:07.040 The discussion at hand is the following.

00:05:08.400 Should men cook and clean? 1.00

00:05:10.540 And it looks like I'm going to start with maybe,

00:05:14.420 Rostar Taj, are you ready?

00:05:16.100 Yeah?

00:05:16.620 Yeah, go on.

00:05:17.600 A'udhu Billah min ash-shaykh wa r-rajim.

00:05:18.800 Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim.

00:05:19.820 I'm Sir Taj Rahman.

00:05:21.220 I'm a pro-bodybuilder.

00:05:23.660 I'm a security officer.

00:05:25.020 And today we're going to answer this question about men cook and cleaning.

00:05:28.920 What is a man's job looking after his family? 0.97

00:05:31.820 Looking after his family, like looking after his kids and his wife.

00:05:34.800 So if his wife needs help with cooking and cleaning, he should help out 100%. 0.83

00:05:41.060 That's his support in his family.

00:05:43.340 And the thing is, she's not your slave, you know what I mean, or anything else.

00:05:47.480 She's your spouse.

00:05:48.560 You help out with your family, you know what I mean?

00:05:50.380 You support them.

00:05:51.720 So the thing is, if my wife needs help and she's not well,

00:05:54.700 or she's busy with the kids because she's been looking after the kids,

00:05:57.660 100% without doubt, I'll help her out.

00:06:00.120 That's a man's job, looking after your family.

00:06:02.220 It's not like providing for them and protecting them.

00:06:05.480 It's looking after your family.

00:06:07.020 That's what my dad taught me to look after your family, you know what I mean?

00:06:10.440 So if my wife needs help 100% without doubt, I should help.

00:06:14.260 It doesn't make you a weak man or anything like that.

00:06:17.540 It's nothing to do with that.

00:06:18.900 You're there to support your family, you know?

00:06:21.100 That's it.

00:06:22.260 Okay, interesting points, yeah?

00:06:23.740 But there's certain things I want to make a bit clear, yeah?

00:06:28.020 I have a wife.

00:06:29.200 My wife is actually the co-producer of this show, by the way.

00:06:31.300 All the topics and discussions, we have little debates at home.

00:06:34.200 We discuss, we do this topic, etc., yeah?

00:06:35.780 She's actually out.

00:06:36.640 There's two cables that was missing and haven't eaten all day.

00:06:38.720 She's going to get me some food.

00:06:39.680 May Allah bless her, yeah?

00:06:40.840 She will be here, inshallah, very soon.

00:06:43.300 I agree.

00:06:44.460 Look, I understand.

00:06:45.600 But in today's time, we're not dealing with...

00:06:49.000 You probably have an amazing wife.

00:06:50.520 May Allah bless her.

00:06:51.020 Preserve your marriage, yeah?

00:06:51.800 But we are dealing with certain sisters who are having certain demands. 0.98

00:06:57.200 You have to cook.

00:06:58.480 You have to clean.

00:06:59.660 When you come...

00:07:00.340 So, just to make it understand, we're not seeing generally...

00:07:03.460 It's a no-brainer, like Shaquille said in the last episode.

00:07:05.700 Is this even a discussion point?

00:07:07.800 The reason we're discussing this is because we are having, for example, two extremes.

00:07:13.300 One is a red pill, for example.

00:07:15.280 Oh, cooking, cleaning.

00:07:16.420 For example, you're going to tell me to do that?

00:07:18.120 You're going to pay the rent, etc.

00:07:21.320 Which Brother Mahdi was saying, which we've told him very categorically clear.

00:07:24.900 Another extreme is the toxic feminists who are coming and saying, 1.00

00:07:27.900 no, you have to cook and clean, yeah? 0.53

00:07:29.780 And the discussion here is the following.

00:07:31.000 And I think there's something to be pondering upon.

00:07:33.360 Has men ever come to their wives and said,

00:07:36.600 why do you not ever help me with my work?

00:07:39.220 The reason I'm mentioning this is because it's never a talking point.

00:07:42.140 You will never see brothers who come and say to their wife,

00:07:44.340 I've come home from work.

00:07:46.060 Can you help me with my work?

00:07:47.140 Why do you not ever help me?

00:07:47.980 Can you imagine we start a movement and we go,

00:07:49.780 why are the sisters not helping their husbands in their work? 1.00

00:07:54.560 Rightly so, our sisters will come and say,

00:07:56.460 well, she's also doing some work.

00:07:57.920 And we'll say, yes.

00:07:59.080 But the discussion point is what?

00:08:00.840 And tell me if I'm wrong.

00:08:02.060 Why is it that, oh, why doesn't he do the hoovering?

00:08:05.420 Why does he not do this?

00:08:06.680 Why is there a discussion point where I don't need to be told to help my wife?

00:08:10.860 Do you get what I'm trying to say?

00:08:14.340 I'm not sure if I entirely agree, but okay, inshallah.

00:08:17.260 Okay, please tell us why you don't, well, that's the reason you're here, sister.

00:08:19.520 To disagree with me as well.

00:08:21.640 Absolutely.

00:08:22.840 I think, like, we are starting the conversation on the wrong point.

00:08:27.620 We are, like, doing tick for tack when actually this is the massive issue.

00:08:33.720 Even the way, like, people have understood the topic is not about I am doing this or you are doing that.

00:08:39.220 If I was to think like that, because men's a provider, I have to do this. 1.00

00:08:43.920 And I have to, my job is 24 hours.

00:08:46.540 You will never compare your work, like the work of mothers and wives, what they do at home. 1.00

00:08:52.500 And I do, I do not like the fact that because you are providing, I've got to do all those things.

00:08:59.540 No, subhanAllah.

00:09:00.580 And you're not even providing like our fathers used to do.

00:09:03.220 They were hard working physical work.

00:09:05.800 You are sitting most of the time in front of a screen.

00:09:07.880 So please, let's just put this as well out there.

00:09:10.640 Are you talking to me or someone?

00:09:12.040 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, generally speaking, no, we're out of three years of corona.

00:09:16.580 Everyone was home working behind screens.

00:09:19.140 But the way, like, the brother last time was describing like 40, I'm working 40, it's like he's sweating.

00:09:24.560 He's doing something crazy.

00:09:26.120 We're most likely doing more physical work than most men's maybe today. 0.83

00:09:30.480 I'm talking screen people.

00:09:31.940 I am not denying what you're saying.

00:09:33.580 Of course, like, for me, the first role of the man is not cleaning, is not cooking.

00:09:38.160 That's not his job.

00:09:39.100 And I know that sisters have to take some accountability because they expect it.

00:09:43.800 They have this mentality, feminism or whatever, that, yes, the husband has to. 1.00

00:09:49.180 No, he doesn't have to.

00:09:50.560 He does it out of compassion and out of rahmah.

00:09:53.560 Like, I do not have to cook or clean.

00:09:55.920 But I do it because it makes sense.

00:09:58.100 It brings balance to the couple.

00:09:59.540 And I do it with happiness.

00:10:01.700 I am happy and proud to be able to serve a husband.

00:10:04.640 There is no, like, ego attitude that today, women are trying to, like, feel like, oh, yes, no, it's submissive. 0.99

00:10:13.340 No, it's not.

00:10:14.560 It's a partnership.

00:10:16.200 I just want to say something.

00:10:17.540 That discussion between husband and wife should be done.

00:10:20.600 Like, the thing is, if my wife goes, she's working and stuff, can you do a certain amount of the house and I'll do a certain amount of the house?

00:10:26.680 There shouldn't be no arguments or nothing like that.

00:10:28.880 Then if I'm working a certain amount of hours and she's working as well, you meet.

00:10:33.300 But the thing is, my thing is, I work.

00:10:35.700 I made that decision to work, to look after my family.

00:10:38.720 And my wife's decision was to look after the house and look after the kids. 1.00

00:10:41.640 But that's the decision we made together.

00:10:43.060 It's not just your decision.

00:10:44.520 This is how it should be.

00:10:45.680 To protect the wife and the man has to be the provider. 0.97

00:10:48.500 It's not just you making that choice as a husband.

00:10:51.300 And may Allah bless you because, alhamdulillah, I think he helps the marriage, like, stability as well.

00:10:56.820 It's something that Allah azawajal is not courageous to do. 1.00

00:10:59.260 He has encouraged the man to provide for the wife, for the family. 0.79

00:11:02.800 And for the wife, because naturally it's her nature to take care of the home, because she's generous by nature. 0.97

00:11:09.900 But the issue I have today, we are talking about societies where the woman has to work as well as the man.

00:11:16.340 But there is no 50-50 at home.

00:11:18.220 She is contributing to the bills.

00:11:19.880 She is contributing to the providing side of it.

00:11:22.600 No, but she shouldn't.

00:11:23.220 No, she shouldn't.

00:11:23.680 That's why we said...

00:11:24.220 No, no, no.

00:11:24.380 I'm saying, like, everyone's situation is different.

00:11:27.760 Of course.

00:11:27.980 It's a crisis.

00:11:28.820 It's difficult.

00:11:30.060 Okay.

00:11:30.220 And also, sorry, sometimes you said about when, for example, the men are asked to cook and clean and things like that and do things at home.

00:11:41.980 But there are certain circumstances that I've seen before in husbands and wives where the husbands have asked the women to contribute or held it over them that they aren't contributing, for example, towards paying.

00:11:54.840 So, yeah, it does work in both ways.

00:11:57.080 But for us, we, alhamdulillah, we make it work because we do a bit of both.

00:12:02.300 Like, I do, I work, but my main priority is to stay and look after my children and my husband.

00:12:08.500 And I need to know, basically, like, I do expect my husband to cook and clean.

00:12:15.140 He's a human being.

00:12:16.460 It's a life skill.

00:12:17.560 You have to do that.

00:12:18.700 But I do expect him to do that.

00:12:20.240 If I'm not there, then Surtar just looking after my children.

00:12:23.340 And I know they're well looked after, they're fed, you know, and everything.

00:12:26.400 So I do feel like, bottom line, yes, a man should, you know, cook and clean.

00:12:31.120 Okay, look, may Allah bless you, sister, yeah?

00:12:33.480 And one thing, just a disclaimer, because we're dealing with trolls.

00:12:36.520 Our dear sister is, she's in the way of wearing hijab. 1.00

00:12:39.820 Because I know people are going to be like, oh, but she's not.

00:12:41.840 Fear Allah, yeah?

00:12:43.100 The sister, alhamdulillah, may Allah bless her.

00:12:44.740 She's, yeah, because you know what I'm wrong. 0.98

00:12:46.440 Oh, but, please shut up. 0.98

00:12:48.240 Yeah, okay. 0.99

00:12:49.020 This sister and sister Amira, they were having a go at her.

00:12:51.740 Oh, but your hair's showing.

00:12:53.140 She doesn't even wear the hijab. 0.74

00:12:54.660 Sister Amira, by the way, yeah?

00:12:55.720 She's trying to.

00:12:56.560 And the way she was getting attacked, just that, because fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala 0.97

00:12:59.980 in people's journeys, okay?

00:13:01.820 Just to give that, I'm so sorry, sister.

00:13:02.940 Thank you.

00:13:03.740 There's something about the hijab.

00:13:04.780 Hijab is not forced, and that's a person, you know, it's my wife's choice.

00:13:07.980 She doesn't have to wear it for me, she has to wear it for Allah, you know?

00:13:11.680 So that's it, that's it.

00:13:12.880 The thing is, I know maybe you might force your women to wear it, 1.00

00:13:15.900 but they're wearing it because of your fear, not of Allah's fear.

00:13:18.940 And that's the one thing that we need to understand.

00:13:20.900 Another thing I want to say, especially with the revert sisters, 1.00

00:13:23.720 don't do that to them, because so many sisters are pushed away from Islam 0.85

00:13:27.480 because of this reason.

00:13:29.100 And think about bringing someone into Islam, it's such a rewarding thing.

00:13:32.740 Think about pushing someone away from Islam.

00:13:34.700 What a big sin is that, you know?

00:13:36.260 And you know a lot of people don't realise that.

00:13:37.620 They think, you know Sadaqa Jariya?

00:13:39.120 You call someone to good and get the good off there, yeah?

00:13:41.400 What about if you're the reason why someone left Islam?

00:13:43.480 Or if you're the reason why a sister who's trying to wear the hijab 1.00

00:13:46.780 takes it off fully, yeah?

00:13:48.240 For whatever reason.

00:13:49.480 Please be just, inshallah.

00:13:51.160 Just coming back to the topic.

00:13:52.040 And I want to add as well on that, because modesty, you know,

00:13:54.560 is something I'm quite passionate about.

00:13:56.860 That this sister, like, hijab doesn't define my level of faith.

00:14:01.160 It doesn't mean that I'm more pious than her.

00:14:03.260 She might be more pious than me.

00:14:04.680 And Sister Amirah was defined for maybe her hijab not being perfect,

00:14:09.160 when actually, alhamdulillah, she may have more qualities than all of us.

00:14:12.200 Not only that, she doesn't wear hijab. 0.80

00:14:13.420 She was wearing a hijab, yeah.

00:14:14.480 May Allah bless her, inshallah.

00:14:15.820 But coming back to the topic, just coming back to the topic,

00:14:17.940 there was a few things mentioned, yeah?

00:14:18.840 What sister, forgive me the name, sister Brian, sister?

00:14:23.140 Brian, sister Brian, may Allah bless her, yeah?

00:14:25.180 She said some points, which is important.

00:14:26.980 But the point is here, like, for example, Sister Soul said,

00:14:29.340 oh, I'm doing a 24-hour.

00:14:31.460 Well, hold on a second.

00:14:32.160 Because the thing is now, what's happening is that

00:14:33.940 what the men are doing is being belittled.

00:14:35.820 What that means is, oh, like, and this discussion causes...

00:14:38.120 It's not belittled.

00:14:38.940 Let me tell you what.

00:14:39.760 Okay, tell me why you disagree, yeah?

00:14:41.340 Actually, I would say that the sister's side, it is belittled.

00:14:45.700 Like, oh, it's okay, she's cleaning.

00:14:46.920 No, no, no.

00:14:47.320 She's hanging out on her sofa all day.

00:14:49.420 Like, a woman's job starts at the minute she gets up 1.00

00:14:52.960 and ends the minute she goes to bed, doesn't it?

00:14:55.220 100%.

00:14:55.580 But, sister, the point is this, yeah?

00:14:57.900 As far as I know, as far as I know, yeah?

00:15:00.300 Men, if they come home, if a man comes home and goes,

00:15:03.380 what did you do?

00:15:04.160 To me, that's a very strange person.

00:15:05.700 Like, if a person comes and says, what did you do?

00:15:07.640 That's strange.

00:15:08.420 That's a jeep.

00:15:09.280 No, that's very wrong.

00:15:10.160 However, I don't hear this.

00:15:12.900 I might be wrong, but I don't hear the discussion of

00:15:15.960 men coming and saying this, but rather the reason why

00:15:18.780 I had this topic in the first place is because

00:15:20.680 there's a phenomena among sisters who are feminist 1.00

00:15:23.380 and not feminist.

00:15:23.920 Not everyone's feminist. 1.00

00:15:25.000 They are saying, oh, but when you come home from work,

00:15:27.560 cook, or for example, this.

00:15:29.680 No, why should I have to cook?

00:15:31.160 I'm being very honest.

00:15:32.220 Look, if I want to, if I come home and I see my wife

00:15:34.960 is exhausted, do you think I'm an animal?

00:15:36.660 To be like, oh, no, but I'm an alpha male, red pill. 0.99

00:15:39.200 Yes, you, I'm going to beat you up now. 1.00

00:15:41.020 No, I'm going to say, you're exhausted.

00:15:42.780 No problem.

00:15:43.220 Dishes?

00:15:43.680 How do you do dishes?

00:15:44.940 You need to have mercy and rahmah. 0.96

00:15:46.380 We are believing men.

00:15:48.180 Nobody's saying that.

00:15:48.860 The point is, though, you do not, some people do not see

00:15:52.540 what the men do.

00:15:53.340 I'm so sorry.

00:15:54.180 He puts his life on the line.

00:15:55.900 You do security, yeah?

00:15:56.880 Bro, people get stabbed to death.

00:15:58.280 Yeah.

00:15:58.760 They get stabbed to death, please.

00:15:59.920 So the thing is here is that when men are doing work, 0.90

00:16:02.480 it's kind of like, just because we don't visually see it.

00:16:04.720 For example, the kids.

00:16:05.740 The kids see what mum is doing.

00:16:07.260 Running around, may Allah bless her. 0.66

00:16:08.380 They have so much mercy.

00:16:09.420 But they don't see dad lifting up those bricks.

00:16:11.520 No, but they're always saying to the kids,

00:16:13.980 your father's working hard.

00:16:15.420 No, no.

00:16:15.720 Don't make noise.

00:16:16.420 He's coming home to rest.

00:16:17.500 Okay.

00:16:18.080 No, I'm just saying it like I'm billeting. 0.98

00:16:20.840 No, I'm the first one to praise, alhamdulillah.

00:16:23.240 And you know what?

00:16:23.820 I remember you saying this on another podcast,

00:16:25.920 and I know you do.

00:16:26.640 May Allah bless you.

00:16:27.180 I know you do.

00:16:27.540 I remember these exact words you said,

00:16:29.100 that you do that.

00:16:30.040 But we're talking about those who don't.

00:16:31.560 Who, when their husband comes home,

00:16:33.400 yeah, but you should do this.

00:16:35.080 And that, you don't do this enough for me.

00:16:36.480 But you don't see the men doing it.

00:16:37.800 But God's assistant.

00:16:39.040 I've seen loads of situations that a lot of women bring their man down 1.00

00:16:43.100 because they work and stuff,

00:16:44.800 and they're not giving the woman what she needs. 0.77

00:16:47.780 And they're trying to, like...

00:16:49.020 That's exactly what I was going to say.

00:16:50.400 Yeah, so they make him look like,

00:16:51.860 oh, you don't do nothing outside.

00:16:53.800 So come on, yeah, do this and that at home.

00:16:55.420 I feel like their marriage has got...

00:16:58.460 They obviously feel underappreciated to be digging their husband out

00:17:02.100 with those situations.

00:17:04.740 That's what I feel like.

00:17:05.800 They obviously...

00:17:06.580 I enjoy taking care of you.

00:17:08.620 I enjoy cooking.

00:17:09.540 I enjoy cleaning, making our home lovely

00:17:11.500 because I enjoy that.

00:17:13.000 And it's appreciated and respected

00:17:14.460 just as your hard work outside the house is respected.

00:17:17.580 And the thing is, one thing I want to say that

00:17:18.720 I don't want my wife doing things for me 1.00

00:17:20.600 that she has to do things for me.

00:17:22.580 I want her to do things for me because... 0.66

00:17:24.880 I want her to do it because she said,

00:17:27.020 oh, I want to look after you.

00:17:28.540 I want to do the same for her.

00:17:30.040 That's the difference.

00:17:30.920 A lot of relationships, a lot of marriages out there 0.57

00:17:33.920 because the woman has to look after the husband. 1.00

00:17:36.980 The man has to work.

00:17:38.740 So the thing is, this is where the problem is.

00:17:40.260 It's having that respect and love for each other.

00:17:42.720 You know what I mean?

00:17:43.400 And the thing is, like my wife says to my kids,

00:17:45.900 your dad is working hard.

00:17:47.640 Don't wake him up or this, that.

00:17:49.300 So there's no...

00:17:50.160 And we still wake you up.

00:17:51.200 Yeah, we still wake you up.

00:17:52.500 That's what happens.

00:17:53.360 Yeah, that's what they're doing marriage. 0.97

00:17:54.340 Well, it's an honour to have you both here.

00:17:56.180 Sister Suad, Sister Ira,

00:17:58.220 you guys have been quiet.

00:17:59.240 Brother Shaquille, Michael, we're going to come to you guys.

00:18:01.400 But Sister Suad, 0.99

00:18:03.400 tell us a bit, like for example,

00:18:05.300 what's your take on the matter

00:18:06.140 when it comes to cooking and cleaning?

00:18:07.860 Because we, like, well, I came across your content

00:18:10.060 watching, I don't know what they're called,

00:18:12.220 just Perley or something like that.

00:18:13.520 And very bizarrely enough,

00:18:14.360 I've actually done a video

00:18:15.200 asking you to apply to The Bitter Truth.

00:18:18.240 And you already have.

00:18:18.980 She basically, she already got in contact with the team, yeah?

00:18:21.380 Anas and my wife, may Allah bless her,

00:18:23.600 who's managing this as well.

00:18:25.460 You already applied.

00:18:26.440 And she was like, yeah, I already applied.

00:18:27.500 I was like, okay, I didn't know.

00:18:28.360 So Sister Suad, 0.99

00:18:28.920 you did mention some points in that podcast

00:18:30.620 when it came to, for example,

00:18:33.060 when you were previously married,

00:18:34.800 that you were prioritised.

00:18:36.440 And this is where,

00:18:37.680 if I'm not mistaken,

00:18:38.280 you was also working?

00:18:39.540 Yeah.

00:18:40.140 Please tell us a bit more about that, please.

00:18:42.040 So,

00:18:43.100 As-salamu alaykum, first of all.

00:18:45.380 As-salamu alaykum.

00:18:46.000 As-salamu alaykum.

00:18:46.460 So, yeah, so there was,

00:18:48.160 I think,

00:18:49.020 so I've always worked

00:18:50.820 ever since I was 16.

00:18:52.300 And when I got married at 29,

00:18:55.320 I was still working,

00:18:56.620 then had the baby.

00:18:58.820 But I can honestly say

00:19:00.860 maternity leave 1.00

00:19:02.480 and then alhamdulillah,

00:19:03.700 not alhamdulillah,

00:19:04.340 but alhamdulillah in a certain way,

00:19:05.600 we had COVID straight after.

00:19:07.200 So my daughter was at home with us.

00:19:08.600 those two years were the best years of my life because I got to see both sides

00:19:14.680 so I got to see both sides I got to see the independent you know working woman who was 0.96

00:19:24.220 almost I wouldn't even say almost I was a feminist you know I was very full girls do your thing 0.98

00:19:30.940 get your own money we don't need a man sort of kind of mentality and then getting married 1.00

00:19:36.360 having my baby it Allah put this rahma in my heart you know alhamdulillah and slowly but surely I

00:19:43.480 started to see the hard work that he was doing and even though I'm working from home and I've still

00:19:48.760 got the child he was still working and me looking after her and seeing her first words and him coming

00:19:55.940 home to a nice clean house with food and then you know us some buddies we love our auntsy you know

00:20:01.340 the fragrance putting that on and just having that that lovely evening it just it made my heart

00:20:08.380 swell and I started to do a little bit more research into like traditional female and male roles and 0.85

00:20:16.580 that's when I started to see that it's I'm not seeing all of this around me in fact the traditional

00:20:23.500 female role is pushed down and it's sort of ridiculed and people look down on it and they're

00:20:28.580 like oh you know you're he's taking you know he's he's taking advantage of you it's and and that's

00:20:35.200 not really the case because where I'm going to work I'm putting my hard work into this company

00:20:39.840 some fat cat at the top of the company is getting all the benefit but when I'm at home I'm seeing the

00:20:45.480 benefit in my husband and my children and my home and that to you and and to me as well

00:20:49.820 describe the happiness oh my god I loved it the balance particularly you know my maternity leave

00:20:55.460 where I actually even have to focus on work and he would go to work his stomach is full he's coming

00:21:00.260 home you know if he's in a bad mood I can see that I'm not trying to jump on him because you know men

00:21:05.860 for us females we like to talk and kind of connect whereas for them they want to disconnect and deal 1.00

00:21:12.000 with it because who do they have to talk to they can't moan to their friends they can't moan to their

00:21:16.640 families they can't moan to their wives because we don't always make ourselves emotional available

00:21:20.460 even to welcome them their stress yes the difficulties we we like I had enough already

00:21:25.700 to make your kids and then yeah yeah you get some women out yeah and your your kids made my life 1.00

00:21:32.220 yeah so your kids now and I joined you when you said because it's only when I was hard working

00:21:37.880 and very stressed that I understood like what it takes for a man I want to come home I want to have

00:21:43.980 some meal yeah I want to have calm I want to have like you know what a smiling partner the recipe

00:21:49.400 is so simple if you think about it yeah like you you guys would agree yeah home wife with a smiley face

00:21:55.440 greeting you that's it nice food yeah and just sit next to me I mentioned this another thing I go yeah

00:22:01.000 I just like the presence of my wife there and then the feminists were like is she a pet she goes 1.00

00:22:05.740 is she a pet what joke but but my ex-husband was like that as well sometimes you're a pet to sit

00:22:11.620 next to him and he wouldn't that we don't need to talk it's just but for that thing to happen

00:22:16.740 sisters men needs to as well help and support the wife so when she comes when they come they let 0.97

00:22:21.880 she's less tired she's available she's prioritizing the men but for that sometimes she needs a bit of 0.97

00:22:27.340 support and say you know what let's cook let's put the dinner the kids to bed and we can have some time

00:22:31.660 together okay okay so I just finish your point there's you want to ask a question yeah

00:22:36.040 we'll just we'll just just one just hold it just one second are you finished um no I was just gonna

00:22:41.420 say so I think the answer to the question is and when it's put in the terms should as in is it an

00:22:46.820 obligation is it a duty no I don't think it's a duty or an obligation on the man to help clean and cook

00:22:53.740 and do everything and I'm talking about the man who's providing protecting and the actual man that

00:22:59.420 you know Allah wants for us I don't think it should be a duty or obligation or he should 1.00

00:23:05.180 but with dealing with each other with empathy with love and you see that your wife is tired

00:23:10.460 if he's that good man he is gonna want to help you exactly yeah he's going to want to do it

00:23:15.260 he should be able to but he shouldn't have to thank you thank you that's that's essentially the point

00:23:20.600 that I'm making yeah may Allah bless you sister Surah we've got a question this is a new concept we're

00:23:24.400 doing by the way we have some people who are listening um don't worry don't worry the camera's gonna it's

00:23:28.300 not gonna go to you yeah so um these are these are guests who are listening um so sister Tara yeah

00:23:34.620 okay yes it's Tara so um can we have the camera no no you're not gonna okay it's the it's the wide

00:23:40.460 angle she won't be in it you won't be in it sister sit down okay okay sister you want to ask a

00:23:46.300 question another question for audience in answering that question scenarios where we mean work out of

00:23:55.660 choice I mean they're just doing it because they feel like you know mum at home mum you know it's

00:24:01.020 I don't know it's not seen as something

00:24:03.020 right so it's a purely a personal choice that they want to leave they want to go work yeah but

00:24:13.340 other circumstances where the man's income and she has to work she's stepping in to support him in

00:24:20.060 his role but I would say there's two answers to that yeah oh she's choosing so she's choosing to work 0.99

00:24:35.980 out of her own option then in that scenario I would say so so look I would say that there's two answers

00:24:43.180 to that and we have to use logic here right if your husband is providing for your home and um he's

00:24:50.620 protecting he's doing everything he's supposed to do you know ticking all the boxes you cannot now say

00:24:55.660 to him after doing 15 16 hours shift at home I'm tired come and help me like and and and doing it in

00:25:03.740 an aggressive manner in the manner where you expect him like he like almost like you know he has to

00:25:09.100 but we're in in your second question if you're both working then this is the point of being a

00:25:16.220 husband and wife you both haven't had this for each other you had that the empathy in your heart

00:25:20.300 where you both understand right teamwork right you go do this I go do this bam bam bam the quicker

00:25:25.180 everything's done it's just whatever works for your family I don't think there's a generic answer for

00:25:30.940 everything it's whatever works for your family but also I think we also need to understand and

00:25:36.460 start from a basic point of you know this is a woman's this is the woman's role this is the man's

00:25:42.860 role and then from there once you understand what that is you then do whatever's right for your family

00:25:48.300 exactly just to mention by the way nakhris means mercy guys uh yeah yeah that's what it means just uh

00:25:54.780 so so basically um it's important and what you said is important sister here as well is that we are we

00:25:59.260 are not talking about these exceptions okay we're not talking about I think anyone in their right mind if

00:26:03.260 if their wife has to work and they have to work I mean the man has to look like there is sister that 0.88

00:26:09.020 sister sawad may Allah bless her who even though she was working she was still doing meal prep etc

00:26:12.460 whatever yeah okay from her mercy the fact that she she cares about her you know ex-husband whoever

00:26:17.340 might be yeah but the point is this we're talking about dynamics where the man is the provider and the

00:26:22.300 woman she's at home but she has this um idea ideas that's been fed into of oh are you just a um a 1.00

00:26:30.060 a housewife just are you just the housewife oh miskeen are you is that does he help in the house

00:26:36.860 these shaitans I call them iblises yeah little iblises yeah none of the iblises yeah who are breaking the 1.00

00:26:42.220 household and there's studies that show women are more influenced easily influenced than men all you need

00:26:46.700 is a friend to come and say to you did you really do that do you know things like she doesn't do it

00:26:52.860 oh that little plant of shaitan yeah with with men i don't know if we do it yeah but again the discussion

00:26:58.380 comes to let's talk about this yeah because if for example like if that would be my wife i wouldn't 1.00

00:27:03.740 allow this you know boy like she's doing this like what no no no i don't think a real man would accept

00:27:08.300 that no no no if a man you know why you know why because a man is logical he's not emotional

00:27:13.340 because and if you're emotional if someone comes and says oh my gosh my husband exactly exactly

00:27:18.700 a lot of the time uh a lot of the time when when especially as a man if you have a friend that

00:27:23.740 comes up to you and has something to say about your relationship as ali said well he can't cross

00:27:27.260 that mark bro a lot of the time you better not cross that mark a lot of the time if they have

00:27:30.540 something to say if they have a very close friend i'm talking about very close friend and he feels that

00:27:35.820 maybe his missus isn't treating him right he would say well michael don't you know don't you find that a

00:27:41.420 a bit a bit weird it's very important to know that as a man like from your friend telling you

00:27:46.540 that it's very important because sometimes when we do think with our heart the person outside the

00:27:50.300 race relationship definitely sees it from a more logical standpoint it's very important to hear

00:27:55.020 their opinion exactly and we have another episode which we're going to talk about should married

00:27:59.020 couple have single friends and this all pertains to how a woman can be influenced because we'll come

00:28:03.660 to that after but do you see the points uh shakir yeah so i'm gonna throw it somewhere else just

00:28:08.380 from a different angle i think we pretty much all agree with everything that's been said i don't

00:28:12.540 see this because if i remember from the last episode you didn't make it very that clear or maybe maybe

00:28:19.340 it was us misunderstanding and i want to give you the hack of maybe explaining yourself because

00:28:23.980 sometimes we say a thing and we're thinking something else and maybe it's not fair on us to

00:28:28.540 that's fine i'm glad you said that it's not fair it's not fair um and i didn't even though you gave

00:28:33.820 me a good little intro earlier i'm just saying like uh the way that it went wasn't too fair i

00:28:37.820 just want to make it clear i never once asked ali to try and stand up for me or any of the other

00:28:42.700 brothers or sisters that were on the panel um one thing i just want to make clear i want to make it

00:28:47.260 just about myself but i feel like the way the angle the last podcast went uh it went completely left

00:28:55.020 i'm not in no islamic world right now personally okay i know this might cheese a lot of people off i said

00:29:00.460 it on my live the other day and it got people really upset the fact that i said i don't class

00:29:04.300 myself as a practicing muslim i'm not here i'm gonna let me explain myself first i know i didn't

00:29:10.300 say much on the last podcast and there was a reason to why i didn't say much on the last podcast but let

00:29:14.860 me do things in chronological order okay because a lot of weird strange things have been said and

00:29:20.940 accusations and just an unjust standpoint from a lot of my fellow muslim brothers and sisters

00:29:25.980 i'm a revert number one for me to see a whole muslim community or my whole loving brothers

00:29:31.100 and muslims that i would literally sacrifice anything for to literally nitpick the fact that 1.00

00:29:36.380 i was silent on a podcast for a little while or i didn't want to speak on the podcast about the

00:29:40.540 particular topic and to go and change it to some crazy narrative as if i agreed with the other people

00:29:45.260 that were on the podcast it's crazy i was disheartened and i was disappointed why because i'm always the guy

00:29:50.460 from young and even being a muslim if i from what i understood the dean that i i was attracted to

00:29:56.700 was maybe a bit different to the dean that is now being practiced the dean that i saw being

00:30:01.100 practiced was make excuses for your brothers the dean that i saw that attracted me to islam is

00:30:06.700 if someone makes a mistake you know try to look for the good and leave the bad but now it's completely

00:30:12.060 different it looks like try to find the bad and any good that he does dismiss it so that's how i took

00:30:16.700 that one now the reason why i didn't speak on that podcast is because there was a podcast that was

00:30:21.820 previously recorded literally what 20 minutes or an hour before that podcast and i accidentally slipped

00:30:27.580 up and said something and i'm going to say it now and for whoever's offended or if it needs to get

00:30:30.700 bleeped out it can get bleeped out i said something and i said i was giving advice to the younger men

00:30:35.340 for younger men if that were struggling uh with finding a good woman or struggling in relationships i was

00:30:41.580 like bro it's not always about just trying to find the opposite sex sometimes learn to practice

00:30:46.300 semen retention now ali kind of nag like after the podcast said shakil try not to use words like

00:30:51.900 that and i was like okay cool i get it yeah no problem so what happened with was bearing in mind

00:30:58.060 i was like when i said earlier i don't class myself as a practicing muslim because i don't feel like i do

00:31:03.740 the practical things that i should be doing as a practical muslim i do not believe that i am on my

00:31:08.700 dean now i know everyone on social media really wants to portray that they are a very good practicing

00:31:13.900 muslim me i look at the realities from the books that i read and from the little knowledge i have

00:31:18.300 about islam i don't class myself as a practicing muslim i don't say that out of boast i'm not saying

00:31:23.820 it out of um uh you know like i'm not proud of it i'm very shameful about it i'm just trying to

00:31:29.820 deliver some context to who i am and why i came here now being in this nasty disgusting unpracticing

00:31:36.940 environment okay reading between the lines a haram environment that i've been in for the last four years

00:31:42.220 okay i have been making dua ya Allah please get me out of this nasty filthy environment and try and 0.99

00:31:48.700 provide for me a halal alternative for me to do something positive i know Ali off of the camera 0.54

00:31:55.180 i know him personally he's not this social media guy like he might be for everybody else that watches

00:31:59.820 this podcast i know his mum his mum knows me his mum always asks how is Shaquille doing because

00:32:05.580 soon as my mother passed away Ali was there for me more than anybody else was so me and Ali have a

00:32:10.940 relationship off of the camera so Ali called me and said Shaquille why don't you come on this podcast

00:32:15.260 maybe it can boost what you're doing i.e the things that you want to do for a positive change

00:32:19.820 you might be able to come here and do a positive change i said no problem is it going to cause me

00:32:23.980 any negative you know this whole negative toxic muslim tiktok that's gone he's like no bro it's going to be 1.00

00:32:29.020 fine i'll go on there i didn't know who the brother was next to me cool which is my fault no problem 0.96

00:32:34.540 no problem at all listen you still didn't do anything wrong i didn't know who the brother was

00:32:38.860 next to me cool um the topic personally i did you and so i see one brother that was like oh if you knew

00:32:46.380 what the podcast is about and probably people in the room and people watching i was like well why did

00:32:50.140 you go on the podcast then i can sometimes sometimes it's not always just what you think on your side of

00:32:56.860 the camera there was more depth to what happened so the reason why i come into the podcast number one

00:33:00.860 and he's my friend and i never told ali no same way he never tells me no secondly that was the

00:33:05.660 second podcast recorded where i slipped up and said the semen retention remark i said you know what

00:33:10.300 let me be even more careful about what i say on the second film podcast which was the one that

00:33:15.740 the one that went viral i kept my mouth shut for a reason far as i was concerned

00:33:20.860 or far as i am concerned the prophet peace be upon him said if you haven't got anything good to

00:33:25.180 say shut your mouth so guess what i did i shut my mouth and now people are saying well why did you 0.83

00:33:29.820 you could keep quiet why did you keep quiet you can't win you can't win you can't win look look

00:33:34.700 some people come to the podcast just to talk bro i admire the fact that you was like bro i don't

00:33:38.140 think there's anything that i can and you was quiet but i admired that because you would have come here

00:33:41.820 and talk for the sake of it to whatever it may be but you didn't so the thing is like at the end of

00:33:45.900 the day you know people like like i said before bro they'll pick on you they'll pick on sister

00:33:49.340 amira's hijab they'll pick on the way i'm sitting yeah they'll pick on your haircut yeah they'll pick on

00:33:53.660 everything so yeah they would yeah they would but listen listen it's like in islam this they

00:34:01.180 say this is not permissible i do the same haircut or it's not haram please leave me alone can i just

00:34:05.740 add something sorry sorry let me just make myself clear because this has been going on for a few

00:34:09.740 weeks and it's made it's made do you know it's not necessarily because i want to just prove that i'm

00:34:14.380 right i'm mr wrong like i said i don't think i am mr right in anything here um i'm just feeling i'm

00:34:20.140 i'm thinking about other people other muslims other people that were thinking to convert to

00:34:24.780 islam and they see the negative responses and the negative comments underneath every single video

00:34:31.500 every single tiktok video the negative sisters that wear hijab that do negative videos on brothers

00:34:37.500 the negative videos of brothers that got beers down to their chest and do these toxic little but we

00:34:42.940 have to think as well about the people that felt offended i'm sorry it's the continuous negative

00:34:48.140 things so let me finish my side and anyone can say what they want after this this is the people

00:34:52.220 that i'm trying to give a bit more okay i didn't want to even come today it's only because of those

00:34:56.460 people that i know that might be a bit confused or they might be sincere they want to understand

00:35:00.300 what did brother shaquille romero actually mean by this why did he come on the podcast i'm now making

00:35:04.540 it clear for the sincere individuals out there so anyway that's why i didn't say anything also

00:35:09.020 the fact i was sitting next to mahdi is not a problem i'm a grown man before i'm a muslim i'm a

00:35:15.020 grown man or it's hand in hand i'm a grown muslim man if i want to come on this podcast right now

00:35:20.140 and dance like a clown i don't need the whole muslim communities approve approve um what's the 0.51

00:35:25.740 word i don't approve all to say yes brother yes you can do it i'm a grown man if i want to dance i 0.95

00:35:31.340 dance if i want to sit on a podcast silent i can stay silent same way if the sisters want to stay

00:35:35.740 silent they can stay silent so you have to confront the consequences no no there's no and have some

00:35:40.620 accountability no no problem and this is what i'm dealing with now please please i'm dealing with

00:35:45.340 it right now if you just wait you will hear me clear clear everything up because as i'm clearing

00:35:49.660 it up you're still saying can you clear it up let me clear it up if mahdi or like same way or if you

00:35:56.060 look in um piers morgan when piers morgan invites people into his podcast he invites murderers um

00:36:05.020 he invites uh there's certain things i don't want to say yeah i know pedophiles we can go on we can go on

00:36:09.660 yeah we can go does not mean that he agrees with the ideology ideologies or the mentality that the

00:36:15.260 person is who he's sitting next to oprah winfrey oprah winfrey invites again the same types of nasty

00:36:21.580 people in society doesn't mean that oprah winfrey agrees with them clearly but within our community

00:36:26.780 people nitpick yeah but you've got to absolutely make it clear okay the sister i believe a mirror

00:36:31.420 because i didn't want to watch the video back because it was just like how could people not see what

00:36:35.660 i meant it's like you know when you're trying to find a fault in someone you will convince yourself

00:36:39.500 there's a fault in someone so i believe sorry to keep pointing i believe the sister when mirror

00:36:44.140 said she turned around to me and she goes so she killed would you do the dishes my words were so 0.99

00:36:48.460 clear i said of course yeah no problem but they don't want to do that bro but they wanted me and

00:36:54.220 other people maybe people in the panel as well wanted me to go yada yada yada yada yada yada and

00:36:58.380 keep on talking about my the passion how much passion i have about doing dishes bro no you don't

00:37:02.620 i don't right i don't have zero passion so then when the mic was passed me by yourself and said

00:37:07.900 to me so she kill it doesn't mean i wouldn't but i don't love it like if i need to help my wife i

00:37:12.300 would but the issue is there was clips going around this what is bro clips clips bro if you watch the

00:37:16.540 full podcast i'm so sorry even though mahdi was here yeah not everything he said was totally wrong

00:37:21.420 there was a lot of wrong he said but there was you didn't watch the full look look watch the full

00:37:25.260 podcast what what the brother mahdi said yeah and again listen i don't agree with the i don't

00:37:31.260 agree with mahdi he's a muslim brother so he's still my brother in islam i don't agree with other

00:37:35.340 people maybe on this platform today you're still my sisters you're still my brothers i still love

00:37:39.260 you for the sake of allah maybe some of you said some really little spiteful sarcastic comments on

00:37:43.900 social media which i saw and just wipe them off cool you're still my brother and my sister i love

00:37:48.460 you for the sake of allah what i just don't like it's just that it's not even about what i don't

00:37:53.260 like it's just right or wrong anyway as i was saying the brother mahdi people were like oh

00:37:56.860 yeah but he was laughing i'm again i'm a grown man if i want he said some funny things there were

00:38:01.500 sisters that were on the panel but sometimes they take seriously some people say you're not

00:38:04.780 serious you can't be serious bro i can you remember after i said to him i know what you're doing you're

00:38:08.060 just utilizing this the same way andrew tape did to make to make a conspiracy like do you think that's

00:38:13.500 what i was so surprised at is that there's grown adults that have gone over the age of puberty

00:38:20.380 that i was watching mahdi and was getting really triggered by what he was saying to me maybe i'm

00:38:25.180 just good at reading the room to me i was looking at this guy like you're just a marketing genius

00:38:29.500 yeah you're triggering people like this but all just all the small-minded insecure muslims that 1.00

00:38:35.260 can't think further than their face like we must protest against this guy what a horrible thing he 0.86

00:38:40.060 come on man look past the guy i can clearly see he's smart and he's utilizing people's vulnerable

00:38:46.300 small-minded um weaknesses against them and straight away everyone got triggered look at this

00:38:51.420 look at this guy look at everyone sitting next to him and you know what happened it's not even 0.84

00:38:54.540 embarrassing for him it's embarrassing about it's embarrassing for all of the muslims that got 1.00

00:38:58.700 triggered so quickly and so easily look how vulnerable and how quickly you can get triggered

00:39:02.940 can we talk about the one that agree with him now i don't think i don't need the biggest concern of the

00:39:09.020 for me the biggest concern of the podcast like the brother and he said he's allowed to invite

00:39:13.100 whoever he wants but i will interject that when you bring someone like that that is

00:39:18.140 doing a marketing propaganda he's coming for his own truth he's not coming to discuss i might learn

00:39:24.700 from you i might learn something from you my brothers even if i disagree on some things i will agree

00:39:29.660 with you on certain things and i will bring the respect but there is no man there is no grown man

00:39:35.580 with a right mindset that follows quran and sunnah is where everyone else keeps on pretending

00:39:39.740 that they follow okay that can look at brother methi in their right mindset and say yes absolutely

00:39:45.980 right yes follow him and agree with him i do not want to know where the salt is okay then then these

00:39:51.260 brothers if there are brothers out there if there are brothers like that then brothers wake up don't

00:39:55.660 be so silly so you have to interject with him you have to challenge him no no but that was not as a

00:40:01.820 muslim as a human being if you watch the full podcast this one i'm seeing no i'm sorry i came today 0.98

00:40:05.980 no no no i'm going to go to brother but i want to say something you guys look let me tell you

00:40:10.700 something majority of people did not watch the podcast he come to me and saw that little snippet

00:40:14.700 why did you make the snippet like that as well who done where's the end where's the end

00:40:18.060 me me me i don't know did you edit it i did edit it brother hold me why did you edit it like that

00:40:23.820 you know why you know why he's gonna take that part by the way he's gonna do that

00:40:27.980 i was just like no way you've done it like that

00:40:30.380 like i was agreeing with everyone exactly and brother ali you have to take some responsibility

00:40:34.700 on that and you know like i'm your sister who tell you when you're wrong i disagree on certain

00:40:40.380 part that you do you use the snippet and he's not fair he's not representative and he does trigger

00:40:46.140 you're doing the same thing that he did but can i just say something why do we care so much about

00:40:51.340 people's emotions and their feelings why are you not adult enough to control your own self and if you

00:40:57.180 don't like the way someone is saying something you go go get the help that you need it's not my

00:41:01.980 job to sit there and think okay x y and z might be triggered if he wants to come on a podcast and

00:41:06.620 talk you know all whatever he's saying for views that's up to him if you you know we're adult enough

00:41:11.980 to kind of are you talking about can i can i can i just because that's different okay guys guys guys

00:41:17.740 one second one second guys once you're talking over each other by the way you have a bit of buzzer you

00:41:20.860 can press it yeah one and a half minute i forgot to introduce yeah yeah can i just say something

00:41:25.740 can i just say please don't stitch me up on the on the clip can you just do anyone but me okay so

00:41:31.500 just one disclaimer yeah like uh why do you aki to me it was very simple you had certain objectives

00:41:35.580 number one was i wanted i was double-minded about inviting matty i spoke to some brothers i spoke to

00:41:39.900 myself he said bro it's gonna be really controversial i said bro look you know i don't agree with you

00:41:43.660 you know i've done videos refuting you you said it with your own mouth i but the videos are clear

00:41:47.900 you get what i'm trying to say so i said i want to understand you better because are you as

00:41:52.460 well your wife your wife birth upstairs and you're downstairs are you really that evil bro i don't

00:41:56.940 think so i said sit down so he came now when i do those clips bro i what i do is bro i put i put the

00:42:02.540 bits in so people can watch the whole thing which people don't maybe that's my fault but in the podcast

00:42:06.780 bro just two things mentioned number one he came and said oh you know if i'm doing this and then about

00:42:11.660 this woman who was plotting against her husband for 10 years and she saved up i said bro where's the

00:42:15.500 effectiveness from the sharia number one number two when he talked about his wife i said bro you're

00:42:19.420 sinful you're telling me a full context now but on your instagram post you were saying oh but she's

00:42:24.700 giving birth upstairs uh all the best babes and i said it doesn't trigger no no but sister one second

00:42:29.820 he came and he even said i heard matty say which i couldn't believe that he would do the dishes

00:42:35.340 matty said on this show that he would do the dishes i was shocked i said bro are you okay all of us

00:42:39.420 agreed to do bro did you watch that bit no i didn't in all honesty i didn't see that either

00:42:44.780 so i came in a little bit yes so what i'm saying is this year this is the problem you know what

00:42:48.700 happens they watch the first 10 minutes yeah that's not my problem let me tell you something

00:42:52.620 matty said i couldn't believe i said bro is this a new matty i said so you don't mind doing the dishes

00:42:56.060 because yeah bro if she's working and i'm working can i just say something maybe about the brother

00:43:00.140 shakir because i watched the whole thing if i can just finish this point please brother

00:43:03.420 then i'm gonna go to and then she loves to speak the the the the point is this yes that's true a lot

00:43:07.260 people say that actually but i have to i'm not just the host yeah because if there's there's

00:43:10.300 speculations yeah i have to clear those because the process the prophet peace be upon him was

00:43:14.380 walking with his wife and some sahabas saw him and he had to go to them and say this is my wife by

00:43:18.460 the way yeah he said oh mystery of allah of course but he said shaitan runs through the vein of adam

00:43:21.900 so it is the duty upon the one who's been misunderstood i have to clarify myself yeah just like shakir did

00:43:26.060 yeah it's from the sunnah so the point is this just to finish is that when i was doing this stuff he

00:43:30.940 came bro he admitted that he would help his wife man the red people say number two number two number

00:43:36.380 two when it came to him not helping his wife giving birth alone he gave full context the midwife came

00:43:42.140 my daughter was there and i said bro you're sinful for that so watch the full podcast do you know what

00:43:47.500 sorry sorry do you know what i have to say yeah and as a man we need to own up to our mistakes yeah

00:43:54.380 we we made a number of mistakes number one um now we didn't say any mistakes verbally but i think just

00:44:00.540 for the sake of some of our sisters that are not as like just because we're good at reading the room and

00:44:05.900 we couldn't take him seriously we should we don't know what we should have done we should have

00:44:11.660 maybe opposed his points more clear now seeing that but no no no no listen no no no it's not

00:44:20.140 it's not that bad no no no because i never knew people don't know you're tired i never i never would

00:44:25.180 i would never assume so small i would never i never thought muslims would think so small-mindedly i 1.00

00:44:30.300 never thought they would be so vulnerable and gullible to believe in him but now i've seen okay

00:44:35.100 well people were can can see what uh that it looked like we was agreeing with him and we had we had to

00:44:42.220 basically protest against him yeah yeah and then and then that was the last thing there were some

00:44:47.180 things he was even now let's say let's say i don't know let's bring someone like andrew tape who i

00:44:52.220 disagree i agree with some of the things he says and agree with a lot of i disagree with a lot of the

00:44:55.820 things he says he says some things that i disagree with completely yeah excuse me but it's funny and

00:45:01.500 i will laugh but it doesn't mean but my mistake was laughing sometimes thank you because it looks

00:45:06.700 like i was agreeing with him but as muslims as muslims can thank you it's the rules don't forget what you

00:45:17.900 said yeah sorry it's the rules yeah uh one and a half minute by the way just disclaimer i'm counting her

00:45:22.620 down not because i want to stop her because she has a right to speak one and a half minutes for 0.93

00:45:25.660 the feminine sisters yeah because they were accusing me of stopping the mirror why was 0.75

00:45:28.620 you counting down we're trying to stop her anyway sister uh ira you have one and a half minutes

00:45:32.540 go okay so first of all i want to own up because you mentioned it was quite a few people and i was

00:45:37.340 one of them one of them one of them we had a little thing on tiktok where i questioned you

00:45:42.460 oh so it was you i thought it was a troll account that was me that was i thought it was a troll

00:45:45.660 account okay let's listen if you had gone into the page you would have known i'm so disappointed in

00:45:49.740 you sister okay one minute go ahead i have my reasons so first of all it's not so much that

00:45:55.020 you weren't disagreeing with him it was more the fact that there are men out there and i know i hear

00:46:00.700 you you're i hear you loud and clear when you say that for someone who follows the sun and the quran

00:46:05.500 that they obviously shouldn't really believe in what he said fair enough however how many men how

00:46:11.260 many real men actually follow the sun and the quran it's right as i know the only sun that men follow 0.99

00:46:15.820 is when it comes to multiple wives the other thing is that people like mahdi have given men who think

00:46:22.700 like him power they've given him they've given them a voice and whether they are abusive men or whether

00:46:28.860 they are disrespectful or whatever form of shape he may be now they're going to go and be like yeah

00:46:32.620 well see look i'm not the only one who thinks like that yeah and that that was my issue right there

00:46:37.340 because it's like you may i i could tell why he was doing i was sitting right opposite him but that's not

00:46:42.860 the point the point is that there are men who are so sick in the head young they will and they're 0.92

00:46:48.380 young they're not they're immature and they are looking for excuse to justify the silliness 25 0.93

00:46:53.340 seconds exactly and and for you like i respect you as you said you will die for your brothers and

00:46:58.140 sisters but then for you to laugh with him and just to not to say actually hold on laughing at him

00:47:03.660 even yeah but how am i supposed to know okay i can't read your mind okay and secondly it's like

00:47:09.500 you're sitting right next to him and you know both of you i don't feel like anyone truly stood up for

00:47:14.220 the sisters yeah but you didn't stand up for the sisters no no but i did try and you said to me

00:47:19.260 on on tiktok to go back right so it was you i never knew it was you was it was it was it was it

00:47:23.500 but then you did exactly what he did because then you told me to go and do the dishes in the end did you do

00:47:27.660 them i didn't know i didn't know it was you it's like a troll account guys guys guys that's why

00:47:35.020 you should have just dm me like adults instead of writing something you made a comment on exactly

00:47:39.340 nothing to do with you sister and so then i just went in guys we've all agreed we've made mistakes

00:47:44.700 you ask oh i put my hands up yeah i should have been a bit more firm i'll be honest like you

00:47:48.380 shouldn't have invite him no no sorry he's a lying person he's using your podcast no no no no let me

00:47:56.300 listen from that point you're allowed to invite anyone you want even if they completely

00:48:01.020 opposite your views my issue here we are talking about a manipulative you know that the way he

00:48:07.260 described the story you should have disagreed

00:48:08.460 he's a lying manipulative person he's a danger to the umai he's a danger to the youth 1.00

00:48:16.940 if we didn't have a person like menti Mehdi here would we know people like that exist 0.99

00:48:22.060 it's like a learning thing for us you know what i mean

00:48:24.540 their brother shaquille didn't know that what kind of person he was i was like that first when

00:48:28.060 i saw him on social media i was the one of the first person recorded his life and i was thinking

00:48:32.620 what's his brother going through like he must be having a like a life crisis or something like

00:48:36.780 that how can you talk about single mothers like this and that i was the first one who pulled him up

00:48:41.100 i was the first one who had a live with him but that guy is he's all about putting people out

00:48:45.980 there and he does have followers we have to put him down he's a cancer to the umai no he's a danger 0.97

00:48:51.020 he does he does have followers because the followers yeah he does have followers the

00:48:55.820 followers start attacking me i didn't care because the thing is what he's doing he's doing wrong he's

00:49:01.020 he's advising the youngsters in the wrong way when the people are not married the youngsters they're 0.71

00:49:06.540 thinking about this guy i want to be like this guy i want to treat my wife as a slave and all this

00:49:10.700 that this is wrong this is wrong all about the manhood and the masculinity okay stand up for

00:49:17.660 your sister okay all right listen listen why are we russian listen listen we're not russian we're not

00:49:22.380 russian things are calm it's no one's russian i feel like russian no no no we can carry on from

00:49:26.940 a viewer's point of view i'm gonna come to michael let's relax one second one second number one look

00:49:30.940 yeah um there was a sister who's done a video calling uh me a misogynist yeah okay um i've done more

00:49:36.700 for uh female muslim woman well i'm not saying this for arrogance just because she pointed out 0.52

00:49:40.140 yeah i've done more than you can ever do in your life can we not give certain people platforms that

00:49:45.260 they want bro exactly but let's not even talk about the point the point i'm just trying to make is the

00:49:48.300 following okay um is that i like i said before i've challenged him before hijab is done spoken to

00:49:54.620 him before i've done videos look that's done and dusted anyone that's got a mind will understand that

00:49:59.100 i've learned my mistakes in the context where i think i should have been a bit more firm but because he's

00:50:03.740 my guest i don't want to be rude to him i'll be honest with you but again as well brothers that

00:50:08.300 were able to have the knowledge and the ability to destroy every single thing you were saying

00:50:14.140 that's your responsibility brother you're the host sister so what he brought there was we

00:50:18.060 we challenged him but you need to tell me what did he bring from the sharia there were certain

00:50:21.500 points he made which were valid no no no no you can't say nothing we have to be just are you

00:50:25.180 telling me everything matthi said was uh no i'm so sorry i am not interested in what he has to

00:50:30.620 say no no no bring people that's gonna i'm i'm interested your intention what is your intention

00:50:35.100 with this show so i'm interested in what he has to say and when he said something about the protein

00:50:39.340 wife he got refuted and anything else i was saying i was saying okay there's nothing there's nothing

00:50:43.500 in the sharia sisters sister so what do you mean like for example i'm saying did they say anything 0.89

00:50:48.780 against the sharia that we was like oh yeah that's yeah beat your wife up you go yes smash it in the 1.00

00:50:54.300 head i don't understand what did what did he say in that context by the way by the way i'm gonna give it to you 0.96

00:50:59.980 by the way i need to have everyone pray to us i'm going to pray us let the show continue you guys

00:51:03.820 continue the the discussion please i'll be back in uh five minutes because i need to pray yeah

00:51:08.300 i give him a leadership yeah i'm on leadership okay i'll sit in there

00:51:17.660 don't fall off the chair okay please please assist him okay what i want to say is i've seen uh

00:51:23.900 brother ali dawa himself first of all when mahdi come out he was uh done a video on him

00:51:29.580 muhammad hijab um put him in his place so the thing is i personally think when he come on this

00:51:35.500 podcast i thought he might be a changed person but with people like that sometimes they don't change

00:51:39.580 but you know we can pray for him but that's what i do feel like sisters out there will be really

00:51:45.260 upset because i didn't watch the full podcast but it did sound awful the bits that i did here i

00:51:50.620 didn't want to listen to anymore it sounded like they were all in agreeance and i feel like sisters

00:51:54.780 will just feel like they want whoever's on the show to show a real equal thing and understanding

00:52:01.260 100 honestly yeah i was at home i i will lie here i'm not here to get clout or to get like a social

00:52:07.740 media following i don't care yeah especially in muslim tiktok i can't stand it yeah because i feel

00:52:12.140 it's really toxic okay yeah so i didn't leave this place here thinking oh yeah this video is going to go

00:52:17.980 viral i'm going to get i just left like normal i didn't think it was going to go so bad about

00:52:23.260 five six days after i saw a clip of the podcast i said oh my god this looks mad yeah this looks like

00:52:29.820 all of us i don't even know the other brother's name brother if you're watching now the bull brother

00:52:34.140 yeah yeah he was like yeah this is man haha i was just like that's it really but you know what that

00:52:39.420 even really riled me up no of course it would listen not even because it was two other wasn't it

00:52:44.060 yeah listen just as almost just that forget the sisters that was sitting there i felt really bad

00:52:48.860 were you there i felt really it wasn't like that she was there yeah i didn't even know what to say

00:52:53.500 and the fact that nobody else was no no no it was it looked 10 times no it looked 10 times more

00:52:58.940 that clip made it 10 times more worse but i can understand why my sisters were talking back

00:53:03.580 don't invite him on here because that just created a massive negative i don't mind people

00:53:10.220 thinking differently as long as he's truthful he has some composure he has respect and he's

00:53:16.140 he's not coming here and doing his propaganda at the same time i think my question is is why do

00:53:20.140 people get so triggered why do you value him so much what is it no no you don't understand

00:53:24.140 the thing is i didn't come i was invited to come and comfort him and i refuse because i'm not

00:53:28.940 interested i don't have that time it's very very sorry to interrupt you it's very very important to

00:53:33.740 invite people that you disagree with as brother said as brother said but she totally agrees with

00:53:38.700 that as brother said it's you learn from your mistakes you can't if you don't listen to anyone

00:53:45.100 that disagrees with you i think the things that he says is completely outlandish um i was with my

00:53:51.340 missus we were watching the video together as we you know we watched brother ali's podcast and i

00:53:56.300 was watching it and i like i was laughing at him you know as brother said we're laughing at him

00:54:00.700 we we're not taking anything he says seriously because the things he is he's a marketing genius

00:54:04.460 it's true 100 we know you are bro and we're still talking about him now at the same at the same at

00:54:11.580 the same time at the same time the people watching now the people watching now can also learn from us

00:54:16.540 as well we disagree with him you can see you're all very very respectful sisters we're respectful

00:54:21.500 they know okay these lot know what they're talking about he he's just saying things to get clout but

00:54:26.220 bottom line i'm really glad that brother here got to clear his because that that hopefully

00:54:31.580 hopefully ali won't cut this all out your part he's gonna edit a certain way where i was where

00:54:36.620 i was talking passionately earlier and say aggressive yeah aggressive revert brother

00:54:40.460 screaming that system especially when he's holding you especially when i would like to go back to the

00:54:46.540 beginning um just of the just of the question i've we've you know we've gone yeah i want to talk

00:54:51.180 about that as well one one thing i would like to say um i'm not as i don't know i'm not as old as

00:54:56.540 you guys i'm 22 so i'm very rude of you to say that's very rude yeah what i would like what i would like

00:55:13.340 to say is um i think we're all in agreement that men if we do come home and our wife is is having

00:55:19.820 trouble and she asked me she asked me michael can you you know can you please help me i'm not gonna

00:55:24.620 turn around and go no that's your job i'll always turn around and as a matter of fact i'm the person

00:55:30.220 to go do you know what honey don't worry about it i'll i'll do the rest of it and i'll finish it

00:55:35.180 because that's that's my mindset i'm a working man i'll come home and i'll say don't worry you go

00:55:39.580 to bed i've got this the kids i'll do it don't worry that's my personality one thing i will say though

00:55:44.940 this is i think a lot of modern day women in my opinion especially western women with the women 1.00

00:55:50.300 here white women my people they they don't understand the value of being in the kitchen 1.00

00:55:55.740 i know that sounds it's very i know it's a very harsh as a white woman i actually agree with that 0.86

00:56:00.380 i think it's very it's a very what did he say i missed i'm so sorry it's modern women in today's 0.77

00:56:05.740 society they don't understand the value of being in the kitchen and i know that's a very it's a very

00:56:10.700 it's a big it's a big statement let me register that image that if the modern women do not value 1.00

00:56:16.060 being in the kitchen don't understand the value of being in the kitchen because they belong there

00:56:21.020 i'm joking i'm joking i would like to say what i would i've been waiting to say this i've been

00:56:26.300 waiting to say this for a very i've been waiting to say this the whole podcast okay let's just listen

00:56:29.180 to the brother okay the western world it's a very it's a very valuable place to be because as a

00:56:34.780 working man you come home you come home to a dinner you come home to things already done for you we

00:56:39.500 look at you and we think wow we we value you we value you so great much more than the woman we

00:56:47.340 come home we don't want to argue with you one because i've been around masculine energy all day

00:56:52.700 i don't want to come home and i'm arguing with you and you're irritating me now i don't even want to

00:56:56.860 talk to you you're irritating me now furthermore that that's my that's my point what i do want to

00:57:04.460 say what i do want to say sorry brother sorry what i do want to say shout out to my nan because i live

00:57:08.860 with my nan she she she is she's she's very the older generation um housewife i come home

00:57:19.820 traditional housewife i come home and everything's done for me i grew up my nan she brought me in

00:57:26.540 age of five she does everything for me i come home hard work whether it's brit whether it's carpentry

00:57:33.100 out in out in the field whatever it is doesn't matter i come home everything's done for me and

00:57:37.900 i think i'll go up to bed or i have dinner and i'm my clothes ironed my my washing's all done and i

00:57:43.340 think to myself wow if i can get a woman like that i have a missus thank god i have a missus and she 1.00

00:57:48.940 understands the value she's recently became muslim as well this is great and she watches the podcast

00:57:54.620 with me you're a great influence as well sometimes but sometimes i make a lot of mistakes okay i'll

00:57:59.260 get refuted hamdulillah though sister soul mashallah brothers uh they're doing a good job hamdulillah

00:58:03.660 but yeah i'll do it for the sake of allah yeah yeah may allah bless you otherwise you think it's one

00:58:07.180 of those if it wasn't for that i would not bring you and i know you want the best it's one of those

00:58:11.340 it's one of those things where i will go to bed and i will think to myself what an amazing woman 0.98

00:58:15.660 what a beautiful woman she's you know you better invite you better invite us to 0.95

00:58:19.580 it's pardon wolima invite us like a wedding kind of thing oh of course come on of course

00:58:26.300 yeah we want to learn the cooking with your nan i think i i think it's i think it's very important

00:58:31.580 to teach because because i asked my nan how do you know what what did what did they teach you in

00:58:36.220 school the women back then were taught how to cook they were taught how to iron clothes they were 0.98

00:58:40.460 taught all the important things of running the household take it easy take it easy they're not

00:58:46.060 they're not they're not they're not taught they're not taught the important things now

00:58:50.700 neither men or women they don't have we're not given we're not given roles we're just we're just

00:58:55.580 we're just right into the world and told you like deal with it and then they're forced an ipad or a

00:59:01.420 phone in their face and young kids are being brought up with the red pill and the complete opposite so

00:59:05.900 now you've got two extreme sides action reaction and there's none you can meet in the middle i remember i

00:59:11.660 remember i remember a year ago maybe a year and a half andrew tate started blowing up i was a bit

00:59:16.460 younger i must have been like 20 i was agreeing with everything he was saying everything he was

00:59:19.660 saying and then he started to go on to the women yeah and he started talking about the women and

00:59:23.500 started talking about how women should do this women should do that did you do that and it's the it's

00:59:28.060 an extreme it's an extreme point of view and it's and it's that's the red pill that that people that

00:59:34.780 us brothers talk about and think i'm not gonna lie it's polluting the mind you need you know that's why i

00:59:39.660 listen to them to my other muslim brothers back home bro i i i done a video when he then people

00:59:45.580 were on me like because i called him a no value man when he was not a muslim when he's not muslim 0.60

00:59:49.260 when he accepted something i took the video down yeah okay you and this is what i see bro while

00:59:52.860 like and i see a lot from the system i'm so sorry forgive me with the sisters while you would there's

00:59:57.420 so much stuff like if you know me you know that sister was calling me like a misogynist yeah i said

01:00:01.020 if you knew anything about me like well and i don't do it because i don't need nothing from you

01:00:04.380 allah is my witness well i don't need nothing from you i do it because genuinely wrong when it comes to

01:00:08.860 hijab bro i was one of the first youtubers who spoke about a man's hijab a man's modesty yeah so

01:00:13.580 the thing is i'm balanced i never take one side or the other but the moment i say something about

01:00:17.500 sisters all hell breaks loose bro it's as if they're saying you cannot say nothing to us and

01:00:21.420 let me tell you i will say it but that is the mentality that they have you can't say anything

01:00:26.140 there's no accountability yes zero thank you all whatsoever they hate the word accountability

01:00:30.860 sisters not all not all we've got honorable sisters it's particularly in the modern world thank

01:00:35.500 you sister go on brother takbir sorry for that statement we had to look guys

01:00:39.900 oh yo yo yo let me just finish up no no no i'm coming to you relax do you know what it is i was

01:00:44.380 watching some of the comments you know one of the comments was a lot and he doesn't stop talking

01:00:47.980 yeah i know i know let's talk let's talk and the sister come and said it's like he took so

01:00:52.140 right yeah yeah yeah yeah people listen to me on 0.75 speed okay you got uh you should be a guest

01:00:58.860 honestly you know what bro listen listen listen i'm not a host yeah okay i did this for a reason

01:01:02.860 because i want to say some stuff as well but i talk a lot i'm so sorry forgive me forgive me

01:01:05.740 no no okay it's good okay we're gonna talk in 10 minutes we're gonna 10 minutes you can't win you

01:01:09.180 talk too much i don't talk enough right i got in trouble for that oh anyway today's taking a

01:01:14.380 river and she's like doing the opposite oh but but but do you know what what do you know what frustrates

01:01:19.660 me you know no no do you know what this is me being uh like trying to be in a just way without

01:01:24.940 really acting how i'd want to act i want to shout scream and swear and belittle certain people that done

01:01:29.260 certain things online i'm very articulate when it comes to trying to cast somebody or put someone

01:01:33.020 in their place trust me most of the men this is me trying to discipline myself and it's i don't

01:01:37.420 mean this and again in a negative way it's like sometimes you've got to prove to someone i can be

01:01:41.340 a monster if you want to go there but this is a restrained monster just trying to be nice and

01:01:46.060 polite about it yeah i'm not killer but don't push me but don't okay don't do that

01:01:51.900 why do you have to go too no but honestly on a on a decent and a bit more of like a um

01:01:57.100 a rule thing when when a sister said um oh when people got annoyed because when you asked me the 1.00

01:02:02.780 question oh why am i not speaking i said it's not a topic i don't see me being passionate about this

01:02:08.620 is when it went wrong the reason no no no i never went wrong no you didn't but this is when

01:02:13.340 what went wrong was people's misunderstanding of me i and i understand sometimes i feel like i am

01:02:19.180 easily misunderstood maybe because of my demeanor my mannerism maybe because of my physical appearance

01:02:23.260 i don't know but i am really easily misunderstood what i what i meant was it wasn't like it's not an

01:02:29.820 issue i don't see myself dealing with of course she's going to do my dishes this is exactly what i 0.99

01:02:33.740 understood when i watched no yeah that's crazy and then i'm happy wallahi i'm so happy to hear you

01:02:37.900 i'm so happy to hear it honestly no problem just for the record this sounds really cringe but

01:02:47.420 realistically i'm like to people that i love ali even i'm a teddy bear i'm so soft so when i was

01:02:53.660 seeing the brother like before methi you're still my brother by the way and i still love you for the

01:02:57.820 sake of love i'm not gonna listen i don't pick sides i'm not like i'm with this group of brothers

01:03:02.220 and this because i want to get bro i am my own individual man so i still like you bro you're

01:03:07.260 still my brother but i just don't like a lot of the things that you said and i know what you're

01:03:11.260 doing you say that you're not doing it it is a marketing thing do you bro whatever cool but my

01:03:15.820 point was when i said it doesn't see me and a thing being passionate about the reason why is because

01:03:20.540 i'm thinking in my head i'm not passionate about this you know why i don't see myself with inshallah

01:03:25.820 my future feminine nice respectful woman of the future that i marry i go months you know get me

01:03:32.860 in her family months meeting who she is and how she is as a person i don't see the day we get married

01:03:38.140 i sit down and i'm squabbling over right you're gonna do this and i'm gonna do this you know the

01:03:43.100 issues that i want babe where we going for the honeymoon yeah other things as well come on

01:03:49.340 babe why did you not wear that dress that why are you not ready at 7 pm i booked the restaurant 1.00

01:03:53.500 why are you not ready why are you not wearing the new shoes that i bought you what about

01:03:57.180 cooking babe what about the earrings how did you lose the earrings she's not cooking i can ask 0.95

01:04:01.180 if she's cooked for you or not i'm gonna have my maid inshallah yeah the one no not my wife are you 1.00

01:04:05.580 gonna marry the maid as well let me be careful i'm joking no but on a serious level these are the

01:04:11.100 issues quote-unquote i see myself happening babe i spent so much on that earring how comes that

01:04:15.820 earrings missing how did you lose these are the issues not you know why have you not done the dishes

01:04:19.980 all right i'm gonna do the dishes and you're gonna do this or i'm gonna go and work and you're gonna

01:04:24.540 hoover up the house this is embarrassing the other thing as well lastly i just want to finish up this

01:04:28.540 last point as well because you raised something very important by the way um many years ago i've done a

01:04:33.180 lot of youth work i love working with young men specifically young men yeah why i saw a quote one

01:04:38.860 time and it was like the person that you are now or who you're trying to be is the person you wished you

01:04:43.500 had when you was younger and i was thinking i've always wanted like an older guy to perhaps give me some

01:04:47.740 advice so to the younger guys that do get inspired by certain people that maybe are a bit red pill or

01:04:53.020 they say some really strange quotes understand this and take anyone can take it however they want

01:04:59.260 most men that act in an extreme way have since deep rooted insecurities i don't want to because a lot

01:05:07.820 of people are muslim i don't want to be disrespectful okay but i mean it honestly as i'm and i don't

01:05:13.420 it to seem like i'm boasting let me try and think about my words here i've never come across excuse

01:05:18.700 me a secure man who gets female attention who gets

01:05:27.420 who gets money who gets the things that are maybe make you a high value man start speaking down on a

01:05:33.260 woman like she's a piece of something on the floor there is no secure man that does this who fears

01:05:38.540 allah and who fears allah and has taqwa most of the time it's a man that has been either neglected

01:05:43.900 throughout his whole life from women he has mommy issues okay a lot of us can have it it's nothing

01:05:48.380 to be embarrassed about we just need to fix them it is um it's it's out of revenge a lot of us men

01:05:53.100 have money issues yeah bro you dropped some deep bars okay thank you and lastly i'm just yeah so my

01:05:57.180 point is just to the young men out there just because someone might sound art i'm not as articulate as

01:06:01.420 some of these red pill guys but just because someone might sound so passionate and articulate and they they

01:06:06.220 make you feel like a woman should be treated a certain way bro it's not right it just sounds 0.93

01:06:11.500 good and it just sounds appealing a man should be a just man and the other thing last this is my

01:06:17.100 last point bro i promise you've been saying that better times no i promise it's a taste of your

01:06:20.940 own medicine right all right it's painful it's painful right the last thing don't make me forget

01:06:26.620 my point it was such a good point oh man go ahead i'll forget remember it what did i say what was my last

01:06:34.780 point um about men who are traumatized when when i'm hearing this stuff right when i'm hearing i'm

01:06:41.660 getting really comfortable now yeah all right this is how i would have been in the first place

01:06:48.540 that's what we wanted to be on the last episode yeah but i got scared i got scared right a bit more

01:06:53.820 brave now okay guys the point is the point is

01:06:56.540 i this whole war that we're seeing between man against woman muslim man against muslim woman

01:07:04.540 it's embarrassing it's really embarrassing guys we have family like mine that are not muslim yet yeah

01:07:10.620 that are looking at us and it's just like right how is this even a topic that's what i meant like i

01:07:14.860 don't see myself discussing it come on this and the other thing is i don't see myself not being a man

01:07:20.620 like you know my wife's at home and i've come home all day and even if i am tired i don't see nothing

01:07:26.860 embarrassing about me picking up some dishes and washing it if any if a woman feels like it's a bit 1.00

01:07:31.420 of a feminine trait or people say are you moving like a simp bro if i had a camera filming me doing 0.98

01:07:37.340 it i definitely don't look like a simp washing the house washing the dishes or hoofing i feel like i

01:07:42.860 look like a real masculine man doing that around my house maybe you might get you might get a second

01:07:47.260 wife again it's just insecure people that say these things like do you know what i mean bro it's

01:07:50.940 just insecure okay it is let me tell you something i'm done yeah i don't know can we can we wrap up

01:07:54.860 please yeah we're gonna no don't go anywhere don't go anywhere sister so uh and sisters please let's

01:07:59.340 just wrap so the topic was at hand please yeah uh should men cook or clean uh so please just let's

01:08:04.060 wrap up from sister so and this way inshallah i just want to thank the brother alhamdulillah for

01:08:07.340 making it clear and may allah bless you inshallah and make your faith easy and strong inshallah i mean

01:08:12.940 um mel i reward you so uh one of the things i want to say just like the brother say like i am

01:08:18.060 tired of what really shocked me with the podcast wasn't what you said it was what the brother said

01:08:23.180 sorry it was the comments and how people were praising the brother was like people those people

01:08:27.820 are muslims they follow quran and sunnah i was very shocked but what i want to say there is nothing 0.96

01:08:33.180 like just the brother shaquille said there is nothing stronger than a man we all talk about providing

01:08:39.260 caring protecting you are providing help for her when you are there supporting her this is

01:08:44.540 as well being a man it's not your duty your first duty is to provide and be out there inshallah

01:08:51.740 building the empire for your family and that's our duty to support you in your mission inshallah

01:08:57.420 but we're helping each other if i can help you with your work i help you with your work if you can

01:09:01.820 help me with mine i will we help each other inshallah we're a team inshallah

01:09:06.380 um i've i've mentioned it previously but i feel like a man should cook and clean and help his wife

01:09:15.580 if she needs it but she he shouldn't have to but it is up to that specific husband and wife

01:09:22.140 everybody's different you know what works for you and what doesn't um i am really pleased that this

01:09:27.260 whole conversation happened today because as a revert myself i have a lot of non-muslim family and friends

01:09:34.300 and i feel like watching this podcast they will take away so much more and such a good outlook

01:09:41.500 on islam um than what they would on the last one forgive me for saying um but i'm constantly

01:09:48.300 conscious of that so i'm i'm really pleased that everything's just been aired here may Allah bless

01:09:53.420 you and your husband for coming it's a pleasure they're going to be on a few other episodes here guys

01:09:57.260 um so just very quickly i wanted to clear something up when i reposted this on my tiktok i had so many

01:10:04.460 brothers saying yeah well you know in the quran it says that a woman is to be obedient to her husband

01:10:09.260 which is correct but at the same time it's like no one's talking about obedience here he a lot of a

01:10:15.020 lot of men said well you know if i tell her she needs to go and cook and clean and she should she's 1.00

01:10:18.620 going to clean the point here isn't about being obedient it's more like are you also willing to be

01:10:23.500 obedient because if she needs your help and she's asked you for your help and you then said no because

01:10:28.220 you've done a 40-hour shift you have to answer to Allah tomorrow and it's like out of mercy love

01:10:32.460 and compassion that you have for her are you not going to help her and i think a lot of brothers

01:10:36.700 also brought the sunnah that look if our prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did it out of

01:10:40.540 his own goodness therefore made it a sunnah then you know again it's not obligatory but my question

01:10:45.980 to those brothers is if our prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did not do it does that mean

01:10:49.980 that you're also not going to do it now and to the sisters who have an issue with being obedient

01:10:53.740 you know who a lot a lot of them said yeah well it's not obligatory upon us to cook and clean

01:10:57.860 again if you don't cook and clean and he doesn't cook and clean then why are you getting married 0.95

01:11:02.660 don't get married as simple as that and i think a lot of people who are looking to get married you

01:11:07.320 need to have a serious conversation like you're sitting on the table you need to ask her are you okay

01:11:11.840 with cooking and cleaning and vice versa she needs to ask him too are you okay with helping me

01:11:17.260 because exactly you can't just go into a lifelong commitment not knowing that you're you know if

01:11:22.180 you're not living on the same page i know sister aria but i right yeah but the thing is yeah it

01:11:26.720 comes back to our discussion yeah the fact that i have to be look i have to be real yeah may

01:11:31.220 allah bless you you didn't press it by the way but none of me i don't need to press i'm the jet

01:11:34.220 now i'm joking uh no i don't i don't have the happiness you're happy and me i'm just a little

01:11:37.800 that talks a lot the the point is here look i understand but the discussion here is why is there

01:11:43.400 even a discussion of the man helping in the house in two ways number one it's a given 0.56

01:11:48.480 duh hello which you said another show yeah which you it's i'm not stupid we're not dumb to go to 0.96

01:11:53.640 our wives and be like yeah i provide and protect pick it up you know how childish how insecure you 1.00

01:11:59.060 have to be no no no i'm not saying you're saying that what i'm saying is why is there a discussion

01:12:03.240 do you ever see out does do you ever see us men no no no yeah do you ever see men come in and say

01:12:08.900 when is the look let me imagine me starting a discussion of your brothers we're all married

01:12:12.600 arguing to take here when's the last time our wives helped out with our work let's start a 1.00

01:12:16.060 petition we're going to call ourselves the blue pill guys and we're going to start a petition and

01:12:19.460 say why are our wives not helping us anymore you'll be like well hold on a second bruv sisters will 1.00

01:12:23.920 go ballistic you know what they'll say we're at the home we're cooking this yeah okay carry on

01:12:28.120 carry on okay we're trying to make a point here we do not ever complain about it why are we

01:12:34.620 still glad why is this discussion because it's a feminist that's creeping into us and i'm not 1.00

01:12:38.300 saying you sister i'm talking generally it's creeped in where it's like yeah but why didn't

01:12:42.440 why is this a discussion i have my mercy when i come home and i see my wife struggling i'm a human

01:12:48.440 being will say i will you know ali that one will do the hoovering how about you record me do the

01:12:52.680 hoovering i don't feel insecure but it's as if our sisters are sticking it on us of no but her

01:12:58.300 husband does that when's the last time you it's not just sisters that's the problem it's the red pill

01:13:02.460 red pill yes i've mentioned that i've mentioned that sister we're the first people that refuted

01:13:06.420 the red pill wow and the reason why discussions are happening is because of how how far away people

01:13:11.680 are from their deens like they only want to pick and choose what they want to follow and not actually

01:13:17.180 follow the way it is written and that's the problem if you follow the deen to to the t nobody would be

01:13:22.540 having this problem wouldn't need feminism influence exactly and you know what shakir mentioned 1.00

01:13:26.220 please forgive me because no one's talking about what you mentioned about insecure wallahi i believe

01:13:30.000 men and women who have been traumatized by a abnormal partner are so scarred that they think

01:13:36.100 every woman is like that yeah that they have to have stipulations in place of if i'm providing and 1.00

01:13:40.940 by the way i'm not talking about anybody but if the shoe fits it's there yeah the point is and then

01:13:44.860 these men think like or this woman think i have to do this this and this otherwise they're not going

01:13:49.100 to listen to me you know what that shows you marry the wrong person that ruined and destroyed you

01:13:52.940 and you are left with those no healing like sister soul talks about all the time healing and

01:13:56.440 accountability because you haven't recovered you are now on fight or flight mode where you're like

01:14:01.140 no if she needs me to do that i'm going to tell her to do that and it turns into a sisters as well

01:14:05.080 need to take accountability they need to take care of their husbands and they need to develop 0.87

01:14:09.000 those skills and be proud of it and inshallah good women will build good men

01:14:13.980 exactly exactly there's nothing wrong with a housewife there's nothing wrong with a housewife

01:14:17.740 may allah bless every single housewife yeah sister swat and the sisters

01:14:20.840 the beard gives it away with these muscles trust me i'm the sister not you

01:14:30.300 yeah i think the ladies have kind of covered they've thrown you off now haven't they they have 1.00

01:14:41.760 so just like cooking and cleaning so just like a little nasia maybe to those who are newly married

01:14:48.480 etc like what you would tell them if there's a young sister watching this yeah i would say do

01:14:53.860 whatever is whatever works for you and your family and do it based on the quran and sunnah do not 1.00

01:15:02.380 listen to feminists and when i say feminists it's even something as small as the music you listen to 1.00

01:15:08.260 the tv shows you watch because they're steeped in feminism you know a lot of the tv shows portray the 1.00

01:15:15.120 man as weak and the woman as the strong you know i'm i get the last say so type of mentality

01:15:21.660 peppa pig yeah um you've got the beyoncees of the world who talk about all the single ladies i'm an 1.00

01:15:27.120 independent woman but then fights by her man when he cheats on her so they don't show that type of 1.00

01:15:33.660 you know it's not in the media as much but the independent single woman mindset is and you might not 1.00

01:15:39.440 be aware of it either exactly you're not aware of it you're for you you're just you're liking the song

01:15:42.960 you like the beat you're you know whatever but subliminal exactly and a lot of these things we

01:15:48.540 don't really see it until it it starts to affect us so i would say you know just be very conscious

01:15:54.720 of everything whatever we listen to music is haram for a reason it's haram for a reason because a lot

01:16:00.780 of these cardi b's of the world and all of these girls that we watch and listen to and we look up to

01:16:05.820 they have an agenda to break us as women yeah so that our men can't tell us what to do because 1.00

01:16:12.600 they're trying to you know oppress us and that's not the truth and we are self-destroying ourselves

01:16:17.840 we have spoken often about the femininity masculinity everyone's talking about toxic masculinity and no

01:16:23.140 one talks about the toxic masculinity in women where is no one talks about the toxic masculinity that we 0.97

01:16:30.200 women are developing this is toxic because we are supposed to be rooting in our femininity yeah and 1.00

01:16:36.240 like the brother was saying we they are really we really have to resist and fight off the red 1.00

01:16:42.800 the feminism and go back to the deans of can i can i ask any of the sisters on the panel here sorry ali

01:16:47.960 why do you think so many men are toxic we need to finish we need to wrap up bro we need to wrap up

01:16:52.320 sister swad and that should be our next topic yeah i've got some good topics this is a good question

01:16:56.300 so again like i said just you know don't listen to all of these things you know no feminism no go 1.00

01:17:03.980 back to and like speak to your parents your grandparents they've got the traditional mindset

01:17:07.720 still they haven't been rooted in this bs that we're listening to that's right there in our hands

01:17:12.680 so take advice from them if you have to but the two of you should know start you know if you have to

01:17:18.680 sit down with a pen and paper and say this you know because some people are very visual

01:17:22.100 if they want to do that let them do that but it is between you and your husband and do whatever

01:17:26.920 works for both of you and don't worry about anyone else but the idea would last add the one thing

01:17:30.940 no no i'm sorry sister elderly people like the nun like we need better role model people that have

01:17:36.340 20 30 years of marriages we only see young people speaking about marriage bring the real people the

01:17:41.860 one that i have i have 11 years they've been married 30 years marriages people with wisdom people

01:17:46.920 i just want to say to the brothers um there's loads of brothers out there talking about high value

01:17:54.580 man so what they do if they earn money and stuff and then they think they're high value man for me

01:17:59.700 this is my personal advice a high value man is a person who looks after his family his kids okay

01:18:06.620 the thing is his wife and his children 100 if they're happy he's got peace at home that's a

01:18:12.580 high value man a person who's got loads of businesses nice cars they can be going away just

01:18:17.420 like that okay another thing i want to say to the brothers and sisters watch your circle who you sit

01:18:22.540 down with you talk with because there's loads of sisters out there they sit with sisters they talk

01:18:27.600 to them and they misguide them and same with brothers watch your circle you know who you sit down

01:18:32.880 with you have good people around you alhamdulillah everything will be all right and home is peace

01:18:37.620 okay if you go home you got peace and that's it that's what you need for me personally if i got

01:18:42.600 peace at home i don't care nothing about anything you know i mean i come home i got peace i got my

01:18:47.880 kids there i got my wife there that's it and that's my happiest place to be

01:18:51.140 may Allah bless you guys it was an amazing amazing podcast especially from the last one

01:18:56.620 brothers and sisters hope you guys benefit that at home inshallah and may Allah bless our

01:18:59.980 honorable sisters who have come here contributed and our honorable brothers till next time from

01:19:03.600 the bitter truth show assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

01:19:06.400 don't miss this amazing opportunity from nature's blends to get your finest premium black

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Ali Dawah - April 03, 2023

WHO BELONGS IN THE KITCHEN？ MEN OR WOMAN？ - EP 7 ｜｜ BITTER TRUTH SHOW

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