Ali Dawah - November 30, 2020


WHY SANA KHAN MARRIED A MUFTI？


Episode Stats

Length

8 minutes

Words per Minute

199.38936

Word Count

1,785

Sentence Count

95

Misogynist Sentences

13

Hate Speech Sentences

10


Summary

In this episode, we talk about the recent marriage of a Muslim woman to a non-believer. Why did she choose this man? How did she know he was the right man for her? And why did she go for him?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 And she's gone ahead and married this beautiful brother.
00:00:03.300 Some sisters, in today's time, living at today's time, would be like,
00:00:07.120 if I look like Sana Khan, you know, if I had her, I don't know, whatever,
00:00:11.420 whatever features and looked like her and had the money and the fame,
00:00:14.320 marrying someone of religious, someone that looks like a sheikh, you know,
00:00:19.400 I'm definitely, I definitely won't be doing that.
00:00:22.240 Why did sister Sana Khan decide to take this move?
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00:00:44.220 Salamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh to brothers and sisters and dear friends.
00:00:46.960 Sister Sana Khan, I don't know much about her, but what I do know is that
00:00:51.000 she has recently started to take her deen seriously
00:00:54.280 and she's gone ahead and married this beautiful brother.
00:00:58.160 Now, a lot of sisters, maybe not a lot of sisters, maybe some sisters,
00:01:03.920 in today's time, living at today's time, would be like,
00:01:06.160 if I look like Sana Khan, you know, if I had her, I don't know, whatever,
00:01:10.460 whatever features and looked like her and had the money and the fame,
00:01:13.360 marrying someone of religious, someone that looks like a sheikh, you know,
00:01:18.440 I'm definitely, I definitely won't be doing that.
00:01:20.800 Now, why did Sister Sana Khan decide to take this move?
00:01:25.000 Let's talk about that.
00:01:26.100 That is so important, brothers and sisters, because the Prophet SAW told us
00:01:30.200 that when a woman is seeking marriage and a husband, she should look for two things.
00:01:34.240 Number one, taqwa, deen.
00:01:36.040 Yeah? Deen.
00:01:37.480 And number two, akhlaq, good adab, good character.
00:01:40.260 Because in today's time, a lot of people, they go for the taqwa in the context of deen
00:01:43.680 and how do they measure that?
00:01:46.060 Oh, he wears a thawb and he says ya'ani and midah and shirk
00:01:48.580 and he talks a lot of Islamic terminologies
00:01:50.360 and he looks the part with a thawb, etc.
00:01:52.420 And then you marry this guy and he's a vile, disgusting individual
00:01:55.420 in the context of his adab, his ustub, his character,
00:01:58.400 the way he carries himself is disgusting.
00:02:00.200 He's somebody who has a disease in the heart where he thinks everybody's miscarried by himself.
00:02:07.580 And this is why it's so important the Prophet SAW said,
00:02:09.900 look for taqwa and good adab character.
00:02:12.400 You know, not a lot of people who have taqwa,
00:02:15.340 what kind of said does that person even have taqwa in that context?
00:02:18.040 Why did Sister Sana can't go and marry a brother
00:02:21.980 who a lot of sisters, if they were in their position,
00:02:26.000 may have said,
00:02:27.160 I wouldn't go, I wouldn't go for someone more, you know, tall, dark and handsome.
00:02:32.260 And once again, I want to make something clear,
00:02:33.400 I'm not saying the brother of my son is a beautiful, handsome brother
00:02:35.700 and beauty and handsomeness is subjective.
00:02:39.320 But what I'm trying to say is like in today's time, brothers and sisters,
00:02:42.720 this is what a lot of people go for.
00:02:44.200 But Sister Sana can't talk something serious
00:02:46.720 and I'm sure she's not going to marry someone she's not attracted to.
00:02:49.580 But that's good.
00:02:50.460 But she specifically went for someone of knowledge.
00:02:52.820 Now, I don't know this brother's knowledge,
00:02:54.120 how knowledgeable he is, etc.
00:02:55.180 Patterson is.
00:02:56.200 We judge from her parents.
00:02:57.220 We don't know much about him.
00:02:59.080 So, and we don't know.
00:03:00.500 But what I'm trying to say is
00:03:01.360 the fact that she made that a priority
00:03:04.360 is something that we need to admire.
00:03:07.760 And our sisters who are watching this
00:03:09.280 and our brothers as well.
00:03:10.640 Sometimes when we go and look for someone
00:03:12.440 and we're like, okay, yeah,
00:03:14.000 I think they're attractive.
00:03:15.360 I am attracted to them.
00:03:16.900 You know, but you're just kind of
00:03:19.220 put off of their religiosity.
00:03:21.420 You know, and you tend to go for somebody
00:03:23.260 who's more good looking.
00:03:24.180 Now, guys, I'm going to mention something.
00:03:25.520 I don't want you guys to get mad at me.
00:03:26.580 The marriage documentary.
00:03:27.820 Yes, how does it relate to this?
00:03:29.260 Guys, I swear upon Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala,
00:03:31.120 I'm not holding it back.
00:03:32.580 We've got the production ready,
00:03:34.000 but we are waiting on the development of our app
00:03:35.940 to help young people,
00:03:37.460 help Muslims in general to get married.
00:03:39.020 So please forgive me.
00:03:39.960 But the reason I'm coming to this
00:03:40.900 is because I learned my lesson
00:03:42.320 in a very bad way,
00:03:43.340 which you will see in the documentary,
00:03:44.820 where I was getting to know a sister
00:03:46.680 for marriage who I was attracted to,
00:03:49.380 but things turned out so nasty.
00:03:52.080 So nasty.
00:03:53.300 And you will see that in the documentary.
00:03:54.660 I can't go into detail.
00:03:55.340 And that taught me a massive lesson.
00:03:57.200 Allah taught me such a lesson
00:03:58.440 where I put attraction over anything.
00:04:01.980 And I'm not saying that sister wasn't practicing per se.
00:04:05.220 The element of practicing was there.
00:04:07.180 But the beauty aspect of it was there.
00:04:09.280 And a sister who may have,
00:04:10.980 not have the same beauty,
00:04:12.800 but may not have the same beauty,
00:04:15.360 might have more deen.
00:04:16.860 I preferred somebody who had a bit more beauty
00:04:20.200 and maybe the deen is just mediocre.
00:04:22.400 And I learned a massive lesson from that.
00:04:24.880 A lesson where your jaws will drop
00:04:28.160 to what happened to me and my family.
00:04:30.840 Your jaws will drop.
00:04:32.360 Okay.
00:04:33.260 And anyway,
00:04:34.300 that's a whole different story.
00:04:35.620 So now brothers and sisters,
00:04:37.880 and that sister I was getting to know
00:04:38.980 for marriage,
00:04:39.500 but the issue is this,
00:04:41.340 may Allah rectify affairs in mind,
00:04:42.860 that when it comes to these aspects,
00:04:44.180 the Prophet peace be upon him,
00:04:44.880 we are told to look for taqwa.
00:04:47.080 This does not mean you go and marry someone
00:04:48.880 that you're not attracted to at all,
00:04:50.480 because that's another disaster that you should avoid.
00:04:53.040 And I discussed it in the marriage documentary as well.
00:04:54.960 You have to be attracted to your partner.
00:04:57.140 This is fundamentally,
00:04:57.780 it's very important for you to be attracted to your partner.
00:05:01.640 But to go out and seek someone
00:05:03.300 that is super handsome, etc.
00:05:05.460 I'll be honest with you,
00:05:06.060 a lot of people who might be really attractive,
00:05:07.740 sisters who are really beautiful,
00:05:08.860 or brothers who are really handsome,
00:05:10.180 they come with a lot of baggage.
00:05:11.920 I'm not saying all,
00:05:12.780 they come with a lot of baggage.
00:05:13.780 So the fact that Sister Sana Khan
00:05:15.780 chose somebody of knowledge,
00:05:19.000 somebody who fears Allah,
00:05:21.740 you can see it in his appearance,
00:05:23.380 and in a taqwa we do not know,
00:05:24.980 but for someone at that stature of fame,
00:05:29.340 and somebody's wife,
00:05:31.220 I don't want to,
00:05:31.620 like a lot of brothers may want to marry her,
00:05:35.500 maybe cause for her looks,
00:05:36.820 and everything that she has,
00:05:38.600 she has gone for somebody
00:05:39.840 where a lot of sisters would never go for.
00:05:43.320 Would never go for.
00:05:44.460 And I've seen this as well.
00:05:45.740 For example,
00:05:46.420 and a lot of brothers,
00:05:47.380 you know,
00:05:47.840 when I was getting to know people for marriage,
00:05:50.320 when I was getting to know people for marriage,
00:05:52.900 a lot of times people would tell others,
00:05:55.180 like there'll be issues
00:05:56.160 where I'm getting to know a sister for marriage,
00:05:57.320 things are going well, etc.
00:05:58.340 And some would say,
00:05:59.040 oh, you know,
00:05:59.380 he's really strict,
00:06:00.840 or he'll never let you come out of the house.
00:06:02.380 He's one of those,
00:06:02.900 you know,
00:06:03.120 those really strict,
00:06:04.180 dower guys,
00:06:04.920 and then you think,
00:06:06.240 and these are all assumptions,
00:06:07.080 by the way,
00:06:07.440 yeah,
00:06:07.580 okay,
00:06:07.740 they have no idea.
00:06:08.960 These are just all assumptions,
00:06:09.840 so a lot of people would be like,
00:06:12.480 oh no,
00:06:12.820 don't marry him,
00:06:13.440 you know,
00:06:13.820 he's too religious,
00:06:14.840 or this,
00:06:15.180 that,
00:06:15.400 etc.
00:06:15.800 And this happens vice versa as well,
00:06:17.320 you know,
00:06:17.820 oh,
00:06:18.080 that sister's too religious,
00:06:19.200 etc.
00:06:19.760 And subhanAllah,
00:06:20.540 we see religion as somebody
00:06:22.760 who may fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala,
00:06:25.120 and who,
00:06:25.740 what are they going to do?
00:06:26.460 Remind you to pray,
00:06:27.460 and get close to Allah.
00:06:28.680 Hello,
00:06:28.920 mama.
00:06:29.320 Yes,
00:06:29.580 come.
00:06:30.220 Yes,
00:06:30.700 come,
00:06:31.040 come.
00:06:31.860 Come here.
00:06:32.400 Take a minute.
00:06:33.800 Take a minute.
00:06:34.700 Come see you next to Baba.
00:06:36.220 Come see you next to Baba.
00:06:37.120 I've got you.
00:06:37.740 Today I brought you a picture.
00:06:41.040 Good.
00:06:41.680 Wow.
00:06:43.380 I salute sister Sana Khan.
00:06:45.080 Why?
00:06:45.620 Because she put her deen first.
00:06:47.340 To have a partner
00:06:48.620 who's going to remind you,
00:06:49.660 who's going to wake you up for fajr,
00:06:51.380 be it vice versa,
00:06:52.300 you know,
00:06:53.000 it can be sister Sana Khan,
00:06:54.080 waking her husband up,
00:06:55.220 etc.
00:06:55.560 Vice versa,
00:06:55.820 I'm not saying one is more paisa than another.
00:06:57.340 But the point is this,
00:06:58.580 brothers and sisters,
00:06:59.660 for to have someone to invest in your hereafter,
00:07:02.660 in a way where,
00:07:03.760 subhanAllah,
00:07:04.440 to have a righteous spouse,
00:07:05.900 wallahi to have a righteous spouse,
00:07:08.020 it's more important,
00:07:09.400 it's more beloved,
00:07:10.120 because you're coming home to peace.
00:07:12.400 You're coming home to love.
00:07:14.040 You're coming home to somebody who cares about you so much,
00:07:17.600 that not only in this life they care about you,
00:07:19.620 you know,
00:07:19.920 be careful when you're crossing the road,
00:07:21.200 watch out in your security,
00:07:22.300 wherever it may be,
00:07:22.940 but a partner that cares so much for you,
00:07:26.060 that he wants you protected in the hereafter,
00:07:28.480 from the fire,
00:07:29.340 so much so they remind you of salah,
00:07:30.860 they remind you of making sure you pay zakah,
00:07:32.680 going hajj and umrah together,
00:07:34.320 rather than having a partner who just wants to,
00:07:36.420 like,
00:07:36.480 yeah,
00:07:36.600 let's get the latest cut,
00:07:37.360 and there's nothing wrong with this,
00:07:38.280 but to make your focus just the dunya,
00:07:41.500 subhanAllah,
00:07:42.120 and it's going to come at the cost of you losing the dunya and the akhira,
00:07:45.020 marry people who are practicing,
00:07:47.540 who are God-fearing,
00:07:48.460 inshallah,
00:07:49.040 and yes,
00:07:50.440 you can be attracted to them,
00:07:51.620 that's absolutely normal.
00:07:52.520 Yeah,
00:07:52.740 so basically guys,
00:07:53.860 inshallah,
00:07:54.380 if we can give importance,
00:07:56.180 like sister Sana Khan,
00:07:57.540 to somebody's deen,
00:07:59.040 and somebody reminding you of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala,
00:08:01.600 rather than the looks,
00:08:03.020 wallahi,
00:08:03.340 we'll be in a better place,
00:08:04.540 brothers and sisters,
00:08:05.400 in our marriages,
00:08:06.260 some people will learn the hard way,
00:08:07.480 like I did,
00:08:08.100 when I was seeking marriage,
00:08:09.200 so I'm telling you guys,
00:08:10.360 guys,
00:08:10.920 look for somebody,
00:08:12.480 who is religiously,
00:08:14.400 they do the important fard things,
00:08:16.160 brothers and sisters,
00:08:16.640 inshallah,
00:08:17.460 Madhuz is a starian,
00:08:18.660 come,
00:08:19.580 okay,
00:08:19.860 thank you,
00:08:20.560 and,
00:08:21.680 yeah,
00:08:22.860 inshallah,
00:08:23.340 instead of just looking for someone's out appearance,
00:08:25.700 because once that makeup comes off,
00:08:27.740 or a brother,
00:08:28.680 whatever comes off,
00:08:29.320 the brother these days put makeup on as well,
00:08:31.080 the reality kicks in brothers and sisters,
00:08:32.820 and you're going to live with the person,
00:08:34.780 not the person,
00:08:36.240 till next time,
00:08:36.820 wassalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh,
00:08:39.280 that's all done.