WHY WE FELL OUT - FRIENDSHIP FOR DUMMIES
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
225.45387
Summary
In this episode, we talk about how we fell out with each other over the years and how we dealt with it. We talk about our personal experiences with falling out with our friends and family and how it affected us.
Transcript
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I remember being really angry like I remember I saw red that's the only time
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my whole life where I've been so angry with me I was like no I'm never talking
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to this guy we just go into and I would do is we treat things as a materialistic
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object so this if I don't like this I'm gonna drink this if I don't like this I'm
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gonna replace I'm gonna say I'm not having this again yeah yeah so now what
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happens is this mentality we carry it to friendship and marriages yeah you would
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cut yourself you will cut your arm it's for example let's say you cut yourself
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and we'll join the blood together and we'll be conquered it's like we're blood
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brothers anything that you would change one thing about me you're not my wife
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thanks bro I think that's the best thing you've said to me in my life
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assalamu alaikum brothers and sisters hope you guys are well insha'Allah so welcome to
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my channel today I have Musa after a very very long time so this video is called why we fell
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out we're gonna be talking about we fell out a lot of times not just once so we're gonna be
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talking about that and if anyone's under the misconception that we fell out all that time
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we haven't been doing videos and now we have we'll clarify that as well so what we wanted to talk
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about from sisters is friendship and brotherhood they say blood is thicker than water well we say
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iman is thicker than blood so you have water blood and iman yeah so we're gonna talk about them in
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gradual steps and talk about as Muslims like sisters who are practicing or not practicing but the thing is
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what does brotherhood and sisterhood really mean and have we really understood that and we're
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gonna be telling you guys insha'Allah our personal experiences with each other as friends because
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it's a real life example that we've been friends for about seven years so there's something we can
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talk it's not like oh we just you know some people just get married and be like yeah let me do a video
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giving you a nasir on how to have a successful marriage yeah okay so this is something that's a
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relationship that's that's been going on for about seven years with all kinds of roller
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crosses ups and downs and gunshots uh not literally yeah assalamualaikum how are you
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assalamualaikum salam alhamdulillah you're good um yes we've got the half a meter distance
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i think it's supposed to be two meters but yeah i think i guess this is good enough yeah exactly so
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let's talk about let's talk about how our friendship started okay yes where did i meet you
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i think i met you with um brother imran in a time ago yeah you met me at his house
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yeah we were gonna go paris yeah we were gonna go paris yeah and we did go paris yes and you met
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me at his house yes exactly that's what made you i can remember mashu was very young and i think if
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not your dad was when i would chill with your dad would be like why is this guy chilling with you
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because of the age gap my dad would ask me he that was a bit later because i don't think we
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became close straight away no but it was like obviously yeah but my dad would ask me why did
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you why is this 27 however old you were 25 year old i was like i think i was 23 then yeah why is
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this guy chilling with you you're like 16 yeah why is this 20 year olds 16 year olds yeah but um
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yeah yeah because i think with you like you you seem mature like your age you look mature and i thought
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you seem mature as well but yeah i think at the end of the day it was you know it's like if people get
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it just shows you you know it doesn't and age doesn't really matter you know is this even in
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friendship you know yeah like as long as you're on the same level of course obviously i'm not gonna
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start going chilling with a 12 year old or 13 year old do you get what i'm trying to say if i'm like
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uh 20 years old something like that so we had do you ever remember like our first ever argument we
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had i don't think i don't think so i think i do actually yeah i think i do yeah you want me to
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mention what it was about if you want do you remember it no i think it was at mellow's house
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oh yeah oh yeah tell him yeah so basically yeah um there was there was there was ali at that time
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was newly practicing and i wasn't i wasn't some sort of i didn't really i didn't know much myself
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right but it's a thing where like um basically ali wasn't married he was newly practicing
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you you were bro beginners like you you would make like very basic mistakes like you were just
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beginning bro i remember you used to do this sometimes and be like touch wood and i'm like bro
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i didn't notice it initially but then when i noticed i was like bro what is that why do you keep doing
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that then i realized bro some like kufri shirki thing or something right but um that's what i'm
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saying we didn't know we were just young and we just wanted to do something good you know do some
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good deeds and stuff so um i remember you was online advising a sister or a brother yeah about their
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marriage oh in the dms yeah and i think you were saying like cut it off or don't you know you had
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this very militant kind of mindset with i think it's because of your previous experiences but you had
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this militant mindset about guys and whatnot and what they're out to do and i just that was our
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first argument officially and i just advised you and i said bro i don't think you should do that
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because i don't think you're in a position to do that yeah i think with marriage it's a big thing yeah
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and i don't think you should be doing that and i should also show the viewers something this is like
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a side note but it's a very quick one that um online none of us are in a position where we can just
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talk yeah you know we have people that will pull us up we will pull each other up yeah if ali does
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something i'll give him a phone call yeah you know we do it with even with muhammad hijab like we talk
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to each other we have we were talking about this today yeah we have these conversations amongst each
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other and they get heated sometimes but like at that time it got heated basically i told you no and
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i don't think you were having it and i took i'm taking our revenge from him with the marriage
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documentary i said i will talk about yeah but it was that was basically our first one so that was the
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first one now what do you think a lot of people like what i've noticed personally is
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relationship like my friendship with you muhammad hijab different different people in in context
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and things that i've observed one thing that i see is people easily and this is a big trait that
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happens with marriage as well we live in such comfort that we think okay we treat what we do is we treat
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things as a materialistic object so this if i don't like this i'm going to drink this if i don't like
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this i'm going to replace i'm going to say i'm not having this again yeah yeah yeah yeah so now
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what happens is this mentality we carry it to friendship and marriages yeah this is a very
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big correlation yeah okay this is one of the reasons i'm developing my personal app which
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inshallah with people of knowledge as well because it's it's a big problem this is just friendship
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we're talking about now when it comes to marriages marriages where you've got kids suffering you've got
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families you've got and this is a family unit islam is there the sharia is there to protect the
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family unit that's always so harsh against adultery outside of marriage you get it yeah the punishment
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is so severe to protect the family unit and it was not the consequences of people who haven't had
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their father in their life their mother in their life do you get it so what we do is we treat friendship
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and marriage like that i don't like it i'll replace it bro you know i'll get well i'll get rid of it i'll
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get rid of it simple as that we do this with everything food we eat the clothes that we wear
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everything i don't like it i'll replace it now what happens is with the friendship we apply the same
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problems happening bun you bruv i don't need you okay do you get it now before i came to islam
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as from the kurdish turkish community friendship is it's seen as something strong like it's something
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where you call each other there's a word called kanka yeah it's like it means kankardishim yeah
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kankardishim that's where the it's short in the air so kanka means like my blood brother you're my
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blood brother even though you're not blood brother but you say kankardishim and some of them actually
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we used to actually yeah i just remember we used to do this in the in jahiliya you would cut
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yourself you will cut your arm for example let's say you cut yourself and we'll join the blood
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together and we'll become kankardish like we're blood brothers it was something i just remembered
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now something i forgot i think i did that yeah and there might be a mark somewhere around here
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yeah this is quite interesting but you see then the friendship was strong like sometimes you know
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you know you'll do whatever for your friend yeah yeah the thing with when it came to islam
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with islam it's greater than that bro do you get what i'm trying to say it's brotherhood now yeah
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this is brother this is why for example noh alayhi salam when allah subhanahu wa ta'ala when he said
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like save me and my family when his son when he was calling his son and his son didn't come what did
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he do he said oh allah like you said you will save me and my family and allah you know um what's that
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word rebuked the prophet in a way where he said look if you don't want to be amongst the losers
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what was what do we learn from this we learned that your family is not the people who are
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transgressing against us your family are the ones of iman in real in reality no allah explicitly said
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that exactly yeah he's not from your family exactly allah explicitly exactly and and because what and
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why because allah says in the quran in surah hood why why allah gave a reason as well why is he's not
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you're from your family yeah uh innahu amalun ghayru salih that his actions yeah right if i quoted
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the ayah correctly his actions were not righteous actions that's why he's not from your family
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exactly yeah so do you see where allah is telling us the importance of that so be it with abu bakir
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and umar abu qatar they have disputes as well so one thing that we think is that in friendship
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there's going to be no disputes we apply the same thing in marriage yeah and it fails because we're
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like you're supposed to the the heated discussion problems that we had some of them are what peak
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which we're going to come to but one thing that was coming to is actually sometimes we see friendship
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in islam which is sad we see as muslims we don't really treat it as friendship anything we have a
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problem with you this that banyu i've never seen any good from him you know this guy start talking
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behind him and you're thinking how the big lah like first you're a believer bro backbiting is a sin
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yeah okay sometimes you can get angry okay we understand but the thing is to dismiss somebody
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immediately bro i see this trait with a lot of people yeah personally muslims yeah i see this a
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lot just easily disregard i never seen any good from him finish good he's like this anyways he's like
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that anyways and then you think wow so all of this time you've been thinking like that yeah don't you
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think do you not see that i see it bro i see it and and i feel like um bro it's a real thing it's a real
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thing where it's like if it wasn't for islam i don't believe even us we would be friends and i
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think we're very close alhamdulillah like i don't think i have another friend even some of my other
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close friends i don't have this relationship with them where i can just walk them into my house yeah
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it's not like that even with them yeah i think maybe you're one of the only people i can do that
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with if there's anyone else even it's not coming to my head honestly and i'm not just saying that yeah
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uh so even with me i can say the same to you i can say with you're the only one that when i'm angry
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i will go full out on you like my little brother yeah and that you might see that as well this guy
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and i see as you know what like my relationship with you is so much that i can go really angry
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and you do that with me as well but this is the thing there was a time where i thought ban this guy
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yeah but the thing is now yeah there was time for ban this guy yeah it was it was i'm sure it was
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but the thing is what's beautiful about islam and i think this is why this video is so important
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what's beautiful about islam is that it teaches you to look past that because a lot of people this
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is why a lot of friendships they end yes you see this is why a lot of friendships they end and
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islam also like encourages you to end friendships for the sake of allah yes but the point is that
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friendships when they're based on this for the sake of allah yeah the little petty arguments that you
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have with your friends which are not reasons to end a friendship yeah they keep your friendship
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together the for the sake of allah thing keeps your friendship together and it makes it stronger
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and it makes it exactly more loyal and it makes it that's bro do you get it like for the sake loving
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for the sake of allah is a concept i never understood yeah the first couple years of it
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until the penny dropped from because when you love someone for the sake of allah it's unconditional
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or you try to make unconditional because with friendship you can get stuff like you know it could be
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like a form of you can have a riba interest it's based on something you can have a riba friendship
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meaning you do something okay i'll do this in return or something do you get it it's like a
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form of riba like your is and that thing can also be feelings by the way exactly exactly it doesn't
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need to be something tangible no exactly but that's what i'm saying it can be the way someone makes
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you feel and as soon as you stop feeling like that yeah at last you cut that person exactly so
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when we talk about um loving for the sake of allah you're doing you're saying i am getting you
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this for the sake of allah i don't want anything in return if you say thank you to me no if you come to me
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later and say you know what brother you are the dirt of this earth i'll say you know what you know
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when i bought you that well i have no regrets i'm not going to come and say you know what brother i
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know i wish you ever know look how i'm grateful oh so you didn't do for the sake of allah it was you
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did something and now because you have this well let's suppose he wrongs you if you're doing it for
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the sake of allah you are not going to be because some people come and say to him bro you did this and
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this to this person but look how he treated you i go okay okay what's your point no no okay what's your
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point i don't understand okay what's your point oh you know what because some people like come and say okay
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you know what this person said this about you okay what's your point brother let's let's suppose
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he said that okay he said that all right okay if i've if i've done what i've done for the sake of
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allah actually he can call me wherever he likes he can beat me up irrelevant so that's why it's
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important for us to have that and not dismiss each other okay you know all right let me be friends
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with him because i have some gain out of him do you get it oh i need him for this this is fake
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this is not friendship let alone brotherhood let alone brotherhood in islam do you have brotherhood
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people have brotherhood yeah yeah because you know you have different people different i'm not
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talking about ikhwan muslim by the way yeah people have brotherhood yeah but we're talking about in
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islam bro friends don't do that let alone people have brotherhood yeah non muslims have brotherhood
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but in islam you don't do that and i think we should get rid of this habit if you have a friend that
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you fell out with not talk to seriously man first you look is it that deep okay is it that deep if it's
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not look overcome it me and musa we've had up and down yeah there's times because the thing is i
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believe our personalities sometimes clash yeah and that's something major but most people in a marriage
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if that was like thing toxic but i can't be around this guy do you get it but the thing is there's ways
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of going about it do you get it why do you have to cut it from the root you know there's ways about
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going going about sometimes i do things where i know it yeah with you you're just like like you can
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see brother your color your face you just flip and then when you see when i see you flip i'm like
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why is this guy flipping and i'll start flipping it was so much so that we had this what three four
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five months ago in the shan's house with the smarter janet's house yeah and we had the like a
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big like literally like that day i was i was like you know what enough like when i mean enough i
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know i'm not going to talk to him but i said you know what i'm going to change my stance with this
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guy yeah because it seems like this guy's taking the mick do you get it like look at like i'm older
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than him as well yeah like you have forget friendship you respect me for i'm older than you yeah i was i just went on
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a bit i said you know what now not only him i said bare people i think it's i blame myself i said you
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know what i think i'm i'm being too kind people taking my kindness for all the stuff will go in
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from my head i sent you an audio note and i said look you know what from now on i never said i'm
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ending my friendship i said look i'm going to keep a certain da da da extension you get it but i can't
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because around you i can't i just end up being myself you try to but you just can't but that was one
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time it was so much so that he shan messaged me after you've done that post on instagram like a week ago
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yeah a week ago he spoke to me as well actually it was youtube no i told you i told you you told me
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so this is a screenshot yeah you can see it so he's like oh it's good you guys patched up things yeah
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so in his head he's thinking even me i was thinking yeah he's thinking five six months ago to now we
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haven't spoken and we just we just made up now because see see and i told him bro we we we saw it
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like a week or something like not even a week yeah two days a day yeah yeah exactly we said but we
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went home together yeah yeah yeah exactly no that's what i'm saying bro come on the way home
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bro what the argument we had like i'm being i just said look let's agree to disagree yeah by the way
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i still stand by what i said yeah yeah no that's fine yeah now this is the thing right this is the
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thing um by the way our arguments are often not over petty things it's not like oh why did you do
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this yeah that's also another thing that i think we should mention yeah i think nearly every argument
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we've had it has been about that one yes and that shows something even that one was about some
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that was a bit more of a personal that was a bit personal yeah but it was to do with the deen
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right yeah in a way yeah for me yeah but but this is the thing now that i think i think what we need
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to understand from from well i don't know if you're going to mention examples are you going to mention
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examples or but like for example there was a time where we were there was a whole tommy robinson
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thing going on yeah i've got very strong opinions about um things that happen online i don't agree with
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certain things i don't agree with uh being um overtly focused on one individual or one group
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and making your whole youtube channel about that and i'll say this even on your channel bro i know
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this is going on your channel but this is just me bro you get it like i don't like even i was talking
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to you about today about another brother i was saying bro we need to chat to him why is he focusing so
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much on these people do you get it yeah okay boy yeah well do you get it and we chat to him bro do
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you get it like so but we love each other and it's genuine love bro when we see each other it's love
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bro do you get it i know that you guys would that's how it is bro yeah but our conversations
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about the dawah i have very strong views so like at that time uh we were doing i was i was doing salam
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right and um salam was different at that time as well it was different dynamics going yeah so
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basically was hijab there no he was supposed to i think i think he came after he came afterwards he
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came afterwards but basically what happens is that it was me and you there and i i was i was setting up
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like a banner and our tent and stuff like that in marble arch to for us to give dawah right so what
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happens is ali um at that time was very focused on the whole tommy robinson thing right all right
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which i didn't agree with in the first place like but your dad said specifically stay like leave them
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now yeah as in like because because you had been going on them for a long time now yeah and i i just
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have the mentality that give your dawah you don't need to cling on to people that was my thing
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right now with you what happened is some girl i don't know who she is yeah yeah she came
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and she started picking she's got some big following as well apparently and whatnot and
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she's from that that far right kind of group yeah right she starts speaking to you now and you went
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to speak to her yeah now i don't know after that what happened and i'll tell you why because basically
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i just remember feeling imraj was there i think yeah i remember being really angry like i remember i saw
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red that's the only time that in my whole life where i've been so angry because i was because
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i was frustrated like we're here trying to give dawah we're here and there's these far right guys
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coming and we're just getting sidetracked that's how i saw it right so i don't know what i said to
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you i don't know what i've done yeah but i think i said something to you yeah
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yeah no the thing is with me they're like i was told like leave these guys now because they're
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diverting that way etc i said okay no problem but he just went off and and the way i saw it is i'm
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holding this it was windy i still remember i was helping you don't try it bro yeah i was helping
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you what happened is i'm carrying i'm carrying water bottles what's this and then lauren southern
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somewhere i was making dua to allah to bring let me come across this let me see the thing that i was
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saying because she's lying against them yeah i'm carrying water bottles and then who do i see in front of me
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lauren southern and can i speak to you i was like look i'm thinking in my head yeah so part of
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look at the timing we started at nine and these guys are telling me look leave them and i'm like
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okay look from now on i'm leaving it i'm not i'm leaving it then she pops right in front of me and
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i said look we're doing a campaign you can hold themselves yeah no no no no listen i said come you
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can come and have a bottle of water etc you can come and you can come there i said i'm gonna be
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because i'm busy right now yeah because i realized and i thought if they come i gave them some of
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these dates that we had or some cocky thing try to break ice etc and then when i realized they want
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to talk i said look i said he was saying look bro you talk i said usa they came here they came i said
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if you want to at least come here because i'm not going to talk to you guys like that so they came
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and they talked etc and then they went there and i said look i think i spoke to your dad or something
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like that there was a back for i think he kind of gave me permission or something along those i can't
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remember he briefly said look if you are go there or something like that and then but anyway i don't think he
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was there at that time i think he came i can't remember i can't think it was just me you and
00:20:53.140
yeah yeah at that time but yeah yeah i think your dad came after i can't remember but anyway i don't
00:20:57.580
know what happened yeah yeah but i just me i was like no i'm never talking to this guy we just got
00:21:02.320
into it and i was like look bro this is craziness like according to me yeah because a person's mind
00:21:08.200
works in a specific way they have certain things in their mind yeah i was thinking this is junoon
00:21:12.440
this is madness what are you doing yeah and i lost it yeah it didn't justify the way i lost it i lost it
00:21:18.800
completely i was like well and even us alhamdulillah yeah there is never and this is one thing that i have
00:21:24.760
to mention boy by the way for benefit this is something i have to mention for benefit yeah
00:21:28.720
we've gotten into it where we've seen i saw red yeah uh because i remember i don't you know when
00:21:35.200
they show in movies like people get angry and they go red not that we watch movies and whatnot but you
00:21:39.100
know what i'm giving an example or in cartoons it goes red bro i remember it's like i remember
00:21:44.620
blacking out looking at you like this guy like this guy has annoyed me for so long about this yeah
00:21:51.800
yeah i'm going for you now yeah i don't know what i said to you but one thing that i will mention here
00:21:58.160
not one of the arguments we've had yeah in all of our years of friendship where we've ever become
00:22:04.820
abusive to each other yeah where we've ever sworn at each other yeah where we've ever hit each other
00:22:09.460
it's never never not even swearing at each other yeah yeah and you correct me if i'm wrong that's
00:22:14.200
true we've never done that yeah are you smiling for a reason no it's true we've never we've never
00:22:18.640
we've never we've never we've never we've never we've never we've never we've never we've never
00:22:20.340
we've never done and i just thought about that now that wasn't a planned point by the way i just
00:22:23.340
remembered that now yeah and that that is because with because i don't want the reason i'm mentioning
00:22:29.740
is some people may listen to this and think oh it's normal what happens with me and my friends
00:22:33.040
when we swear at each other no no it's not normal no no and this is the thing i so i remember i spoke to
00:22:36.960
one brother in his marriage and he asked me for advice a friend of mine and i said to him don't
00:22:41.900
swear it's not normal to swear in your marriage and he said it's normal to swear bro couple swear
00:22:45.900
and i said to him it's normal according to you there's a practicing brother because you've made
00:22:50.380
it normal yes i said you have to be so strict on yourself where you don't swear at your wife
00:22:55.560
you don't swear even when you get angry you don't swear the moment you swear respect is going down
00:23:01.200
from there because if you can start calling each other names bro that means the respect from there
00:23:06.020
is down alhamdulillah i i can and i don't think it's a big deal to say it that's why i'm gonna
00:23:11.180
say it i don't swear i don't swear full stop i don't it's not something in my vocabulary exactly
00:23:16.640
you don't swear i know that because i've been around you yeah so it's a thing where like you
00:23:21.280
need to understand that even the arguments we're talking about are aggressive one for the dawah
00:23:27.480
but they also we're not even abusing each other yeah but we were just i think at that point in time
00:23:33.880
we just agreed that okay let's just yeah no that was the only moment that was the only moment where
00:23:39.360
i said you know what i'm not talking but that's the heat of the moment i said i'm not speaking
00:23:42.800
no let me ask you a question bro yeah um i believe i caused that argument yeah i believe i caused it
00:23:48.860
because of what i said oh yeah one thing one thing that i really like love about you as a friend is
00:23:54.140
that when you acknowledge your mistake you say it this one thing that i've realized and this is one
00:24:00.480
thing i can say is a key to successful marriage and friendship is that you don't have this ego
00:24:07.080
it's that look you know what bro you call and be that you know i was wrong you have moments where
00:24:11.360
you shine like when i mean shine i'm not saying you know shine bright like a diamond i'm talking
00:24:15.360
about shine like you're mad you lose it yeah but then you have your moments you just calm down
00:24:20.320
and then and then and then you say bro if i have do you get it and i think that's so fundamental
00:24:25.720
bro you have to and and you know in your relationships i think with marriage with
00:24:29.500
friendship with brotherhood sisterhood you have to drop the ego yes you have to you can't have an
00:24:34.200
ego you know and this is subhanallah this is an islamic concept one but two there's books you can
00:24:40.100
read on this but not muslims yeah you know like uh what's his name ryan holiday wrote a book called
00:24:44.280
ego is the enemy the title is ego is the enemy yeah it's a book about how ego is going to mess you up
00:24:49.600
yeah you have ego it's going to mess you up yeah yeah and and and and the thing is from an islamic
00:24:53.700
perspective yeah ego is not a good thing so in your relationships it's like a chill vibe anyway
00:25:00.600
but like ego yeah is an is is an enemy of yours yes yeah so what you have to understand is that in
00:25:07.620
your relationships you can't have ego you know ali one of the things that gets to me yeah is when
00:25:11.840
people treat islam like like a theoretical thing yeah and i've seen this in a lot of people may allah
00:25:17.640
protect us from it people treat islam like something of theory so when they're actually in a
00:25:22.340
situation and they know what islam says they won't act by it they won't yeah they'll be but but i'm
00:25:29.460
like islam is for that situation do you understand yeah like it's islam isn't like for example when the
00:25:36.020
prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam spoke about arrogance or you know or spoke about bad traits of
00:25:40.720
people jealousy hasad he's not speaking about that in ideal situations it's it's in situations that
00:25:47.460
maybe can't get rough yeah don't have arrogance well when when allah says in the quran
00:25:54.580
uh when allah says when the ibadur rahman yeah in surah furqan one of the traits of the slaves of
00:26:08.500
rahman yeah is that when someone comes to them with jahiliya yeah with ignorance swearing at you
00:26:17.300
abusing you etc what do they say alu salama they say salam yeah now someone may come and say
00:26:23.940
akhi i was angry akhi you have to understand bro i reacted like this of course i had to swear at you
00:26:29.500
akhi you was doing that to me of course i have to yeah bro that's not islam yeah islam is
00:26:34.420
when someone comes to you with jahiliya okay khalas may allah bless you akhi and from a genuine place
00:26:42.140
and then you leave it exactly yeah that's that's it's fine that's how it is and people are idealistic
00:26:46.700
bro they think that these situations are for ideal no no man of course not you know idealistic
00:26:51.660
this this happened with you know the best of people um and to be honest with me like even
00:26:56.480
there's some people are going to be like there's some people look we speak to people they think that
00:27:00.480
we don't speak to which we have kind of in the public sphere fallen out with yeah yeah we speak i'll be
00:27:05.300
honest with us people think if i see some people that that we have disagreements with yeah that we
00:27:09.540
believe should repent for some things yeah that we believe these things but people think yeah if
00:27:14.520
we see them on the street it's on sight yeah yeah we're it's not like that bro we're not gangsters
00:27:20.160
bro like we're just brothers so it's like we'll say salam salam aleikum how are you how's the family
00:27:25.560
no we speak we'll speak like you know certain people speak with me it's it will take a lot you'd have to
00:27:29.840
do something major personally to me for me to speak to you most of the times i've fallen out with certain
00:27:34.820
like brothers is because of the injustice that i believe they have made others suffer
00:27:39.280
i think it's from an islamic perspective it's personally for me it's like look it's nothing
00:27:42.580
you've done done to me because if i look at these brothers masha'Allah like they've done a lot for
00:27:46.260
me my personal life do you get what i'm trying to say and i i i will testify to allah and i make
00:27:49.600
dua for them but it's the injustice which they've done to others maybe not even intentionally but when
00:27:55.120
i see that is that when i've done that you get what i'm trying to say so that's it man i don't know
00:27:59.280
is there anything else is there anything let's end it on this is anything that you would change one
00:28:03.180
thing about me if there was one thing you would change about me besides my looks
00:28:09.480
i don't you're not my wife first of all secondly i'm your friend yeah i there's nothing i would
00:28:18.220
change about you wow subhanallah i don't think i'd change anything about you i wouldn't change
00:28:24.280
anything about you i agree with you i won't change anything about you because it's fine bro you get it
00:28:29.620
like i accept you for for for the problematic person that you are if you would like to friend
00:28:36.340
me i wouldn't i wouldn't change anything about you bro i think you're a very genuine person i'm not
00:28:39.900
just saying that because you're here but i think that um you haven't changed um with your online
00:28:45.620
persona that really happens and i hope that you don't i hope that you know that i don't care if
00:28:51.160
you've got 400 000 subscribers i couldn't i couldn't care i couldn't care honestly and we've had
00:28:58.540
like because look and i think that that's maybe i don't know if it makes you realize this but maybe
00:29:02.820
that makes you think of me as genuine as well because some friends are here they hang around
00:29:06.560
people they want to get close to people which is something i don't understand to benefit from them
00:29:10.700
yeah yeah that's what i said the amount of people that we've met even being in the dawah yeah
00:29:14.200
well financially mashallah well off and whatnot bro we could literally like
00:29:18.680
be their best friends just for the sake of money but that's that's that's how it needs to be bro look
00:29:23.660
the thing is you need to understand you have to be real with yourself yeah with me there's been
00:29:27.260
people in my life where like bro like they had so much to offer like in the context i can say
00:29:33.980
monetary of them yeah bro monetary that i have said you know what brother i'm so sorry i'm seeing
00:29:40.340
what i'm gaining here and what i'm about to lose but if i'm gonna look at myself in the mirror and be
00:29:45.260
like you didn't speak out getting this injustice because of this how can i live with myself how how
00:29:49.840
fake can you be that i'm gonna turn a blind eye to an oppression because i have monetary gain from
00:29:55.180
here sorry so the thing is bro and sisters be real to yourself don't be fake wallahi not only with
00:30:00.840
your friends be sincere let me tell you something allah has a sunnah physical laws guarantee that's a
00:30:06.420
physical law there's metaphysical laws allah's put in place yeah there is metaphysical laws allah's
00:30:11.720
put in place just in this gravity there's metaphysical laws if you apply them wallah you'll be
00:30:15.620
successful wallah and believe me i've seen it i've applied it and i haven't lost anything
00:30:20.980
i haven't lost anything so it's very important bro and sisters for us to acknowledge that and
00:30:26.700
have true friendship if you're having a friendship wallahi and you're using somebody you're just
00:30:31.960
fooling yourself well i should tell you because you know what allah's sunnah will apply that
00:30:35.160
metaphysical law you're using them it'll be only to your detriment it'll be to your detriment
00:30:39.820
because that person wouldn't lose anything anything that you do um you know allah says in the quran
00:30:44.840
this is the last thing i'll say yeah very famous ayah you might may hear it on jumuas right
00:30:57.140
allah says yeah allah says oh you who believe enter into submission completely completely
00:31:06.560
completely come allah is not saying 90 completely and don't follow the footsteps of shaytan he is
00:31:17.080
to you a clear enemy right there's a book that i'm reading and in it the author mentions that if you
00:31:24.340
enter into submission 90 you will harm yourself yeah if you enter into submission 95 you will harm
00:31:32.160
yourself 99 this is the point that is expressed in the book right 99 you will harm yourself you have
00:31:38.300
to that's it you have to enter completely what that means is with your relationships they need
00:31:45.640
to be for the sake of allah yeah and and you'll see this bro looking in terms of your life are you
00:31:50.540
in complete submission in all of your life in the areas where you're not you're suffering and you'll say
00:31:55.580
it yourself if you're wronging yourself if you're wronging allah's laws you haven't entered in
00:32:01.640
submission completely part of allah's laws is that you need to do things for his sake you need to be
00:32:07.140
in friendships for his sake you need to not be in friendships for the sake of other for for monetary
00:32:11.680
things if you're doing that then there's not going to be blessings in that you wouldn't and the thing
00:32:15.860
is bro one and that's how ali people who've been friends for sorry one last they've been friends for
00:32:20.100
10 years and they stop 10 years 15 years they've been friends for and they stop and they don't talk to
00:32:25.620
each other ever again you know and this is a problem you need to be friends for the sake of allah
00:32:30.240
and what is that what is allah saying in the quran don't forget the fadl between you don't forget
00:32:36.140
the virtue that you had between you yeah that's very interesting it's a beautiful ayah i heard
00:32:39.320
this somewhere did you yeah i mentioned it to you the other day yeah i remember and by the way this
00:32:43.220
is about the monday classes at ustad jamal which i'm personally dedicated i'm taking mondays off
00:32:48.680
obviously we got quarantine so they've been off yeah but in elm let me tell you how he explained it
00:32:53.240
yeah i was blown away i was like and please just elaborate on that a little bit that the favors
00:32:58.940
um so one of the things that we've learned from our teacher is that you should use the quran as
00:33:04.700
maxims in your life don't just read the quran and put on the shelf memorize parts portions of the
00:33:09.820
quran even if you're not going to do all of it you should have the goal to memorize all of it but
00:33:12.880
like memorize portions and just use them as maxims so this is one portion i memorized
00:33:17.280
if i have a problem with you now i should remember that don't remember the virtue that
00:33:22.200
you had between you and ali apply it to yourself don't remember don't forget the virtue don't forget
00:33:27.620
the good times don't forget when you went on holiday together exactly in dubai i remember that to this
00:33:32.120
day that holiday we went in dubai how beautiful it was how nice it was so yeah basically guys so
00:33:36.940
that's what happens when any kind of fallout happens what we do is we automatically go to
00:33:41.260
all the negative things and if you think about the good outweighs the bad yeah but we pick on
00:33:47.120
okay no he did this he did that is it worth dismissing someone and your friendship just
00:33:51.520
because of one thing that they that they did and you need to ask yourself is that person intentionally
00:33:56.520
doing it to hurt you if you're a friend look seriously you need to ask yourself a question
00:33:59.940
okay he did something to hurt me if that is intentional then you need to question okay look
00:34:04.900
why are you doing something to hurt me is it intentional if there's your friend it shouldn't
00:34:08.960
be intentional yeah so you need to speak and communication is key should i tell you something
00:34:14.060
another issue that destroys marriages and friendships is whatsapp well i have seen so
00:34:18.260
many arguments oh i thought you meant like this yeah i don't do that anymore bro trust me i don't
00:34:22.860
do that speak on the phone i was having a conversation with someone the other day and i just called
00:34:27.200
you don't do that that's no no but i'm telling you speak on in person that's it yeah that's it
00:34:34.500
anything else um i was just gonna say one last thing yeah which is that allah says in the quran
00:34:39.060
about how people on yomul qiyamah yeah they will be to each other enemies yeah they will be to each
00:34:47.160
other enemy and all but allah makes a distinction he says accept the mutaqoon yeah the god conscious
00:34:54.220
yeah so that shows you that everyone's going to be enemies to each other you're going to be my enemy
00:34:59.660
if this isn't if we aren't god conscious so we need to be god conscious we need to have taqwa
00:35:04.460
and part of having taqwa of course would be to be to do things for the sake of allah exactly so do
00:35:10.140
your friendships for the sake of allah exactly exactly brothers sisters may allah bless you
00:35:13.820
guys hope you guys benefited from this inshallah and if you've got friends that you fell out with
00:35:16.860
make up inshallah yeah that's a good that's an important point yes you should you should make up
00:35:20.880
watch this video together inshallah it's not that deep inshallah and try your best to love each
00:35:25.140
other for the sake of allah subhanahu wa ta'ala may allah keep our friendship with our friends
00:35:28.940
um strong in this life and the hereafter brothers sisters inshallah and may allah inshallah
00:35:34.460
unite us in jannah together that is the real aim and objective of what we're doing here
00:35:38.080
assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh if you like this video want similar videos anything to do
00:35:43.760
with that real talk like that comment we might just carry on doing it you never know you can just do it