Based Camp - An Evolutionary Psychologist's Take On Broken Dating Markets (Ft Geoffrey Miller)

00:00:00.000 done polls of my my undergraduate males in my sexuality classes anonymous polls right through

00:00:06.080 iclicker and stuff would you ever date a female student would you ever date a female student that 1.00

00:00:12.000 you meet on campus about two-thirds say absolutely not what's the point of going to go oh my gosh

00:00:19.520 i know and then right so they're terrified right would you like to know more hello everyone i'm

00:00:26.480 so excited to see all of you here today because today i have both malcolm and jeffrey miller on

00:00:31.600 the podcast this is really exciting because one we admire his work a lot jeffrey miller is an american

00:00:36.720 evolutionary psychologist he's also an author and associate professor of psychology at the

00:00:40.720 university of new mexico where he teaches a course on human sexuality among other things he's also

00:00:46.400 mixing with university students who are in the thick of dating which is what we're going to be

00:00:50.800 talking about today dating markets are broken what do we do to fix them how can people find a partner

00:00:55.680 if they actually want one so we're really excited to get into this welcome to base camp jeffrey it's

00:01:01.120 great to be here and great to see you guys again great and i want to know that this isn't just like

00:01:05.360 if you're a young person and you're like oh i'm interested in this for me this is also going to be

00:01:09.840 highly useful to parents because any parent right now who wants their line to continue one of the biggest

00:01:17.040 challenges you're going to have to overcome is how do you secure a partner how do your children

00:01:21.840 insecure partner within this corrupted market right now yeah yeah it's bad it's dire what are you

00:01:28.880 seeing out there jeffrey like do your students talk to you about dating at all or are they like

00:01:32.640 i'm not gonna go there are they not dating yeah well they they want to be dating you know the guys

00:01:38.960 want girlfriends the women want boyfriends and i actually have a daughter who's 29 and you know 0.85

00:01:45.280 active in the dating scene and we talk a lot about what it's like out there i talk a lot about the

00:01:50.880 current dating apps and their failures and their frustrations with my students we have you know

00:01:56.480 long discussions both in my human sexuality class and i also teach a course on effective altruism

00:02:01.920 i teach courses on human emotions and motivations and yeah i've even taught a course on alternative

00:02:08.480 relationships that covers all kinds of unusual things including including traditional christian

00:02:14.240 monogamous marriage as an alternative relationship it so is though

00:02:21.840 what so we get this impression sometimes that younger generations are in some ways moving in

00:02:27.520 a more trad direction because they're like all the other stuff actually are you seeing this this trad

00:02:32.720 movement within your students are you seeing it or is it just not i mean and here in albuquerque

00:02:40.240 new mexico new mexico everything is a little bit behind the curve i mean we're not in brooklyn

00:02:44.080 we're not the bay area so stuff comes here five years later you know after after it goes everywhere else

00:02:49.840 but i certainly see an interest in

00:02:56.240 getting serious about finding a long-term mate and people talking about demographic collapse and people

00:03:02.880 being aware of it as an issue and certainly my you know 20 year old students talk to their 40 to 50

00:03:10.880 ish year old parents right who are also keenly concerned like we want grandkids when are you

00:03:18.080 going to deliver grandkids to us and so there's a lot of discussion about that and there's widespread

00:03:24.240 frustration with dating apps right a lot of a lot of the kids are on tinder and hinge and they find it

00:03:30.160 an incredibly frustrating demeaning dehumanizing process in different ways depending on whether

00:03:37.360 you're a woman or a man right but there's there's widespread dissatisfaction out there and particularly

00:03:44.480 on college campuses right which used to be epicenters of the mating market which used to be wonderful

00:03:52.640 places to meet people a lot of that has been shut down actually quite cynically and deliberately by

00:03:59.280 college administrators what wait wait okay so how talk more about this yes okay so about eight or ten

00:04:08.160 years ago i was on our unm college committee to revise our sexual misconduct policies right and so this

00:04:16.160 was setting the policies rules and norms about basically dating on college campuses and i've talked to a lot

00:04:23.120 of other faculty other places who have been involved in this kind of thing and basically i would raise

00:04:28.960 questions like look there's there's trade-offs here like yes we want to minimize date rape yes we want

00:04:36.000 to minimize sexual harassment unwanted sexual attentions talking that's all bad but on the upside

00:04:43.040 it would actually be nice if our students could date each other right and there are there are trade-offs

00:04:49.200 there we're like if you have a policy that absolutely tries to minimize all possible date rape

00:04:56.960 right and that basically criminalizes people approaching each other like with possible romantic

00:05:03.600 intent right i said if you're going to do that you're going to stop the formation of couples on campus

00:05:10.800 right and everybody else on the committee was like we don't care about the college campus being an

00:05:17.120 effective mating market we do not care the only priority we have is to absolutely minimize

00:05:25.120 unwanted uncomfortable sexual attention right so a lot of campuses have gone in that direction

00:05:31.280 and the net result is like when i went to college in the 80s yeah like it was partly to find a marriage

00:05:37.680 partner and partly to practice medium to long-term relationships and like yes figure out what the

00:05:42.640 other sex is like and how like this is so common that i even grew up with this concept of a mrs degree which is

00:05:48.960 an mrs degree that you were going college to find a husband and this was a viable strategy many many

00:05:56.000 many many many many i i might even say it was a normative strategy for our parents generation well

00:06:00.880 and you went to college looking for a wife malcolm and your brother known his wife like freshman year

00:06:05.600 freshman year yeah both me and my brother went to college explicitly to find a wife in in part

00:06:11.040 but now wow you know what you're saying jeffrey reminds me it's like very similar to what happened

00:06:15.760 like it has been creeping up with parenting in general where like car seat laws may be causing

00:06:21.600 fewer lives to exist in the united states for example just because they're so prohibitively

00:06:26.800 cumbersome uh then they're they're actually you know saving like this this interest in in protecting

00:06:33.200 people at all costs at the cost of even growth of the thing we're protecting is is pretty insidious

00:06:39.600 it's pretty wild i mean i almost feel like there should be some kind of index on like dating friendly

00:06:43.200 colleges because i know many parents are still the only reason they're they're saving in their 529

00:06:48.240 accounts and they're actually planning to send their kids to colleges they're like at least this

00:06:52.560 is where they'll find their partner and and here like now the universities are like no no definitely

00:06:57.440 not don't even think about it that's crazy yeah so if if you're a parent and you actually

00:07:03.760 want your kids to be able to find possibly a spouse or at least enjoy a long-term relationship

00:07:08.960 and use college as among other things a mating market call the college's dean of students and ask

00:07:16.640 what exactly are your policies are you a dating friendly campus or are you all about like absolutely

00:07:23.600 minimizing like sexual very interesting contact right call them up and ask them because it's often the

00:07:30.800 dean of students and you know to some degree the dei officers and and so forth it's the administrators who

00:07:38.080 are pushing this kind of stuff and and and it's often the the students don't really know the ins and

00:07:46.960 outs of it all that they know is that there's a general chilling effect right and that they're getting

00:07:53.360 signals that it's not cool ever right to ask out anybody on campus right and i've done polls of my

00:08:01.600 my undergraduate males in my sexuality classes anonymous polls right through iclicker and stuff

00:08:07.680 would you ever date a female student would you ever date a female student that you meet on campus

00:08:13.120 about two-thirds say absolutely not what's the point of going to go oh my gosh i know and then

00:08:21.040 right so they're terrified right because they know if they're accused of sexual misconduct they

00:08:27.840 can get thrown out and that they've racked up student debt and they don't get a degree and

00:08:31.760 it's yeah oh that's horrifying and so like i ask who who do you date then and they're like well i go to

00:08:39.760 the local community college or i just i've given up on dating already at age 20 and it's a nightmare

00:08:47.920 that is wild what do you also pull your female students are and are they having like are there 1.00

00:08:54.800 interesting asymmetries also that you're noticing between men and women willingness to date i mean

00:08:59.120 there have been some things that have gone viral on tiktok recently where young women are like well 0.85

00:09:03.520 i'm going out my tits bouncing i just wish someone would cat call me like they're really getting to 0.90

00:09:07.280 the point where they're getting frustrated because no one's paying attention to them i guess because 0.96

00:09:10.240 there's so much liability around it but are you seeing well like what are you seeing in terms of

00:09:13.920 different experiences dating between men and women that could be a leading indicator of something

00:09:19.040 interesting i think the young women are not aware of just how terrified the young men are

00:09:25.760 about these campus misconduct policies they're not tuned into this like they know uh this is

00:09:31.280 weird nobody's dating me approaching me trying to talk to me why not right part of the issue is

00:09:37.440 sex ratio so a lot of college campuses it's roughly two women for every man it's getting to like 60 1.00

00:09:45.280 female which so 1.5 to 2 women per per man and that as you guys know shifts 0.99

00:09:56.480 the the power in the mating market towards male short-term mating yeah right and and this is why

00:10:04.400 study on this by the way just side note here i don't know if you've heard of this study but there

00:10:07.680 was a study that looked at the percentage of women on college campuses and dating norms within college

00:10:13.440 campuses and the more women you have on a campus as a proportion of the the more promiscuity you get 1.00

00:10:20.400 whereas the fewer women you have the more monogamous relationships are yeah that's right and that's 1.00

00:10:25.760 that's what all the data seem to seem to show and so if you get female dominated campuses you might 1.00

00:10:32.400 think naively oh that gives women the power to set the norms in terms of relationships no no no 1.00

00:10:38.480 right the sex that is in higher demand and it has heterosexual dating market has more power so the

00:10:44.720 men have more power and that means they can impose you know to to the degree that men are on average

00:10:50.240 more interested in short-term mating and casual dating and casual sex and hookups right then the

00:10:55.280 women are kind of forced into that and that's exactly why when tucker max and i wrote the mate book 1.00

00:10:59.680 10 years ago we said like if you're a young man you should try to go to a campus that's you know got a

00:11:06.480 high proportion of women and you'll have more bargaining power there but if you're a young 1.00

00:11:11.040 woman right you want to go to like caltech or one of the rare kind of engineering oriented schools 1.00

00:11:18.480 that's a little bit more male dominated smart ooh the good tactical tips coming in although i do

00:11:23.840 wonder if calling the dean of students would work if you're talking about a religious conservative

00:11:29.520 university because they do often have like i mean byu for example has some pretty yeah i've talked

00:11:34.000 with fans of the show and the number of them who want to go to byu is actually really high like

00:11:37.840 most of them are very strongly considering byu yeah to find a wife and all of the catholic parents

00:11:42.640 that we talk with are like well obviously my kid's going to find their their spouse at like

00:11:47.120 one of these eight catholic universities but i mean they also have strict rules but they're

00:11:52.320 rules oriented toward monogamy i guess yeah so look if you're a parent the the bottom line is

00:11:59.920 don't just choose whatever university you think will have the highest prestige will be most helpful

00:12:04.800 in terms of your kid's career and and like that you can brag about like to your your extended family

00:12:12.560 and your neighbors but really think strategically about it as as a mating market and even if it's not

00:12:20.720 kind of a hardcore catholic or mormon university at least find out like do the administrators think it's

00:12:27.440 okay for students to date each other yeah they basically really discourage that yeah and like

00:12:32.720 i wouldn't necessarily want one of my kids to get married at age 21 but i would want them to be able to

00:12:39.120 have the experience of having at least some medium-term relationships to kind of like calibrate

00:12:45.680 what do i want from you know a potential partner what different advice would you give to a son versus a

00:12:54.000 daughter on the dating market and to your male versus female students because i mean it's very

00:12:59.040 different tactics honestly the when i'm teaching my human sexuality class the thing that gets the most

00:13:07.680 interest is identifying personality disorders to avoid oh and the red flag so the women are very 0.98

00:13:15.760 interesting right yeah the women are very interested in like yeah i'm kind of attracted to bad boys but i

00:13:21.920 actually want to avoid like really hardcore psychopaths narcissists machiavellians like all

00:13:30.080 that dark triad stuff and for the men i talk quite a bit about borderline personality disorder and how

00:13:36.640 it will wreck your life if you're not careful but how how do you how do you spot this stuff yeah

00:13:44.800 yeah i mean that that's a whole tangent but you know because a lot of them are anyone who's dating

00:13:51.440 yeah everyone's like no really like we're talking about how you get skittles here and now it's like

00:13:56.400 how do you avoid the poison ones and you're like wow you know that's a whole other conversation and

00:14:00.880 it's like well it is important in the acquisition of skittles to not get poison skittles

00:14:06.720 to avoid poison skittles in the mating market okay for borderline for avoiding women with borderline 0.98

00:14:11.760 personality disorder right you want to avoid any signals of extremely high risk seeking which is

00:14:18.880 drug abuse alcohol abuse bad driving frankly even extreme sports you want to interrogate them about

00:14:26.160 their attitudes towards exes right if they diss every single man they've ever gone out with and like 0.99

00:14:33.280 my father sucked my ex-boyfriends all suck like maybe it's you maybe it's not them maybe that common 0.99

00:14:40.080 denominators like you pick badly and then drive men away if you get into a relationship with a 1.00

00:14:47.680 borderline then they tend to flip-flop between idolizing you and demonizing you right so one hour

00:14:54.640 they'll be like you're the best thing ever i feel so connected to you this is awesome i'm more in love

00:14:59.600 with you than ever and then an hour later they're having an argument and they're saying you're you're just 0.99

00:15:05.200 you know the worst piece of shit ever and i don't trust you at all and so that kind of instability 0.99

00:15:12.000 and how they interpret other people's social behavior another big red flag for borderline women 1.00

00:15:18.320 is they don't have any female friends because they they burn through all their their same-sex 1.00

00:15:24.000 relationships because other women are are sick of dealing with their their nonsense so that's my my 1.00

00:15:30.880 capsule two minute lesson that's really good no those are really easy to spot so that's amazing

00:15:36.880 yeah all right now let's talk about like dating apps as a dating opportunity right now and i also

00:15:43.840 want to talk about passport bro wives because these are two areas where you're actually seeing tons of 1.00

00:15:48.800 wives we had an episode on just how common passport bro wives are and people one hugely underestimate this 1.00

00:15:56.080 in korea if you look at rural korea one in four wives are from another country if you look at sweden

00:16:02.960 or norway and you look at immigration rates you would think that the immigration rates would lean

00:16:08.400 male because you're getting so many immigrants from like middle eastern countries but it actually turns 0.95

00:16:13.200 out that they're gender equal because you get so many passport wives from russia and south america

00:16:18.640 are the two core places they're coming from so i'd love it if you could talk about these two pathways

00:16:22.880 so i know a lot more about dating apps and about passport wives in terms of the passport situation 0.77

00:16:31.280 yeah i i mean i all i can say is that

00:16:37.600 if you are concerned about finding you know a traditional monogamous marriage and having a

00:16:43.040 bunch of kids then you need to find somebody who is from a culture or a nation or a subculture

00:16:48.080 that has been open to that and encouraging of that and it's it's really hard if you grow up in a

00:16:57.200 subculture that is systematically opposed to long-term marriage and having kids like frankly a lot of

00:17:04.720 american culture is i can see the appeal of just trying to you know find a mate where you can and there's a

00:17:12.080 long tradition in human evolution of people mating outside their tribe right we are all genetic hybrids

00:17:20.000 and mongrels to one degree or another and partly that's because people growing up in a particular

00:17:26.240 clan or tribe are related to everybody so you don't necessarily want to marry your cousin or your second

00:17:32.880 cousin but also we're intrigued by cultural difference as long as it's not too too different

00:17:38.480 so that's really all i can say about the passport wife thing i do worry that often

00:17:47.040 people might be matching up with others who seem like okay maybe they share some core family values but

00:17:54.080 there's a whole bunch of other cultural baggage right that comes along with other cultures that you

00:18:00.160 might not even be aware of right yeah you get you get some wife from lithuania or or namibia or or india

00:18:06.880 or whatever and unless you have a deep deep understanding of that culture and all the expectations around

00:18:15.040 mating and parenting and so forth and how extended families work in those cultures right

00:18:21.200 that can be a real handicap you can have some surprises and shocks and the other thing is

00:18:26.880 you know the older i get the more important i think it is actually to try if possible to stay

00:18:32.080 geographically close to parents and grandparents totally right and to really leverage the power

00:18:37.840 of the extended family when you're raising kids together so i love political theorist yaram

00:18:43.680 hazoni who did a great book called conservatism a rediscovery and he writes quite extensively about

00:18:51.440 kind of being based and grounded in an extended family that lives nearby and the the many many

00:18:58.160 benefits of that so you know i understand the appeal of getting a kind of passport spouse but just be

00:19:04.320 aware that like if you're trying to raise kids and the kids grandparents are thousands of miles away and

00:19:10.240 you're never going to see them that's a major major handicap yep one thing i'm really interested in

00:19:16.960 though like just on this is that one of our listeners sent to me an essay an article on american reformer

00:19:22.640 called highway america is a relic of the past that is essentially encouraging young men to do road

00:19:28.800 trips like a job drive across the usa and just stop at every like diner and coffee place along the way

00:19:38.960 and like hit on attractive young women who are working there because it's it's almost implying that

00:19:43.920 like you could be a passport bro domestically there are all these women in flyover america that may be 1.00

00:19:50.720 more traditional and we should we should consider they're there that if you go get a passport bro

00:19:58.800 wife i think a lot of people underestimate how far the urban monoculture reaches in terms of the value

00:20:04.640 system and a lot of these women just want to use you they'll say they want a lot of kids and then 1.00

00:20:09.520 after the like two kids they're like okay that's all i'm going to do because i really wanted was was

00:20:14.800 stability and wealth and i already have that and i don't want the additional work now and that's not

00:20:19.840 to say they all do one funny story i heard recently from a i don't know yeah it was a fan in the

00:20:25.360 comments or something is they were talking about one of their friends no it might actually be like

00:20:30.240 somebody i know personally one of their friends wives who was a passport wife from some somewhere in

00:20:35.600 east asia and they they got to four kids and then she's like you need to take another wife now 1.00

00:20:40.800 she's like i'm done with with these kids you this is too much work you need another wife and i'm like a 1.00

00:20:46.240 lot of people would see that as a very favorable outcome from a passport bro wife and they're like 0.96

00:20:50.880 need more wives what are you doing with only me but you keep in mind that you know that you are 1.00

00:20:56.320 merging cultures and that can be a very difficult thing to do but let's know i met my wife on a

00:21:01.360 dating app okay cupid before it went crazy i've said in my book i said it went crazy like it was bought

00:21:06.880 by match group and they killed the you know just full profile search for a profile to to try to push

00:21:13.360 people onto the other more addictive swipe based system and the guy i actually said this in front

00:21:18.560 of the guy who was in charge of determining this change at one point i didn't know he was in charge

00:21:22.640 of determining this change he's like no it was all based on the data more people were using it after

00:21:27.520 the change it was okay you created an addictive cycle uh of course more people were using it but

00:21:32.560 basically any app that uses a swipe based system is not worth using as a guy so and the reason it's not 0.85

00:21:38.720 worth using is if you look at something like tinder and you look at the average guy on tinder

00:21:42.320 everybody knows the statistic it's less than one percent of women are swiping right on them 1.00

00:21:45.840 that's the average guy that's 50 percent of men so 50 percent of men less than one percent of women 0.93

00:21:49.440 are swiping right on you they are all going to the same men so it just doesn't really work at the

00:21:54.640 system because it it means even for the top men they have no motivation to treat these women seriously

00:22:00.480 and all these women who are using it end up feeling like every guy is just using them because 1.00

00:22:04.800 it's every guy that they're choosing within this ecosystem is using them so they end up becoming

00:22:08.800 super misandrist but anyway what's your like what do you do yeah and i i would echo like when i was

00:22:16.480 using ok cupid to date like 10 to 12 14 years ago it was awesome it was so good and i i think i answered

00:22:24.880 literally all of the 3 000 plus same because you can sit up there and farm uh attention you'd end up in

00:22:31.520 people's feed with your answers yes simone came up with a unique system where she would do the answers 1.00

00:22:36.720 in long form so that it would show up on people's feeds oh i see that's clever yeah but yeah the match

00:22:43.280 group absolutely killed it and they are now in the business of monetizing subscriptions and eyeballs and

00:22:52.000 not creating matches the the stats i've seen is that roughly one in five million swipes results in a

00:23:00.800 marriage oh my god on those apps i mean it's literally less you'd have to swipe all day every

00:23:08.080 day particularly if you're a guy right to get even a reasonable number of dates and then because the

00:23:15.360 algorithm isn't matching you effectively based on any kind of psychological traits or life interests or

00:23:21.520 politics or religion or you know interest in family formation and this is why i've started working

00:23:27.040 as a sort of consulting scientist with keeper which is a new dating app that really tries to help

00:23:35.040 people who seriously want to get families right to find each other and particularly based on deeper

00:23:42.240 psychological compatibility so yeah i'm interested in keeper because it seems to me like the new match so

00:23:49.280 when i was on ok cupid i was just looking to date at that time like i didn't want to get married but

00:23:54.240 then there was another girl in my office who really wanted to get married and so she went to match.com

00:23:58.960 and then like a couple months later she met the guy who then like one month later after that became

00:24:04.320 her fiance and they got married and like it was done and we i'd known a bunch of people who just done

00:24:08.720 that it was like match was for closers and i think that's kind of fallen apart or it's not really for

00:24:12.560 demographic that's relevant to young people and when i first heard about keeper it was under it sounded so

00:24:18.160 mysterious it was like well you have to like put down 50 000 and then you only get it if you get

00:24:22.880 married you know like something like it required a ton of commitment and i think it's changed a lot

00:24:26.800 since then but i was really intrigued by like what are some smart people's entrepreneurial take to like

00:24:34.720 get people to actually commit because i feel like switching costs now are so low and the desire to

00:24:40.000 actually commit is so low that people even when they're matched with someone who's a really good

00:24:45.600 potential partner they're like like she's not a brazilian model like i'll pass i'm not feeling

00:24:49.920 it right now they're not taking it seriously so what does keeper do because i think they had to walk

00:24:54.960 back the financial commitment part because i don't think they were going to get a lot of customers doing

00:24:58.960 that but like what's going on so i mean the economic model is is basically you want to make sure that the

00:25:06.000 people who are on a serious dating app are really actually serious about finding a long-term partner

00:25:12.480 partner so they do still have a marriage bounty plan where you basically sign a contract that says

00:25:18.960 for not just for marriage but different milestones of the relationship like you know if you have been

00:25:24.800 dating for a year or you're actually cohabiting or if you get married or even if you have your first kid

00:25:29.840 there's kind of an escalating payout structure right so that basically your incentives to find the

00:25:37.600 long-term mate are absolutely aligned with the dating apps incentives in terms of revenue generation

00:25:46.400 and then there's a second model which is basically you pay per contact you pay per date

00:25:51.520 right okay but i mean you do that on ashley madison so i you know that's not well but then

00:25:56.800 you're right ashley madison is for people already married cheating right so keeper is strongly 0.99

00:26:07.520 discouraging casual dating cheating etc they they actually you know are have ways to vet people in

00:26:14.080 terms of their authenticity and their and their commitment to to the process so i think what will

00:26:21.440 probably end up happening more often is that keeper is all about like quality over quantity they're

00:26:28.400 really trying to find an extremely good match for each person and they're sort of like suggesting

00:26:37.360 here's the match we're going to give you one at a time right we encourage you guys to like

00:26:45.040 communicate a little bit if you want full contact information then that's that's a little bit of a

00:26:51.200 cost like a couple hundred dollars right so you're not treating it as if it's like a gamified

00:26:59.600 like source of sexual validation like how many people are swiping on me and like how many can i swipe

00:27:04.480 on no just taking that off the table the whole mental model of it is sort of like imagine your parents

00:27:12.160 or a trusted mentor or like here's a young woman i know and respect who i think would be a great

00:27:20.000 match for you young man and if i introduce you right you're going to treat her like a real human 0.64

00:27:28.080 being not just like a profile right so that's the mindset it's a little bit more like traditional

00:27:34.480 matchmaking but using like ai algorithms and using the power of big data so it's completely the opposite

00:27:41.840 mindset of like swipe swipe swipe and and then like text and then get ghosted right

00:27:50.720 the core failing of the swipe ecosystem which is switching costs the core failing of the swipe

00:27:56.000 ecosystem is that there is always another and when there is always another and there is incredibly low

00:28:00.560 switching costs that then then people do not treat any particular relationship particularly seriously

00:28:06.640 yeah but how much are people putting down for bounties like what is what do you think is a

00:28:12.240 compelling marriage bounty i think so far typically the marriage bounties are on the order of 10 20 30

00:28:19.200 000 but some people are going up to like six figures you know over 100 000 some people have put

00:28:25.440 down like seven figure bounties like i will pay you two or three million dollars if you find me a good

00:28:30.400 spouse and this is a this is a dating app where the median male annual income is something like 170

00:28:39.280 180 000 and like the top quartile is mid six figures so these are successful people and a lot of them you

00:28:49.440 know if if they're serious about finding a spouse are willing to pay for it and they know like look if if

00:28:57.120 you're some entrepreneur and or angel investor or whatever and you've got a serious net worth then

00:29:05.280 finding a good wife or husband is is a massive life benefit how much is it worth to you right to find

00:29:13.600 someone who's a extremely compatible and wants to have a bunch of kids with you and b where you're so

00:29:19.920 compatible that the likelihood of a disastrous divorce is very very low it's funny when you mention

00:29:26.160 marrying you know wealthy people and i think that this is you know in different classes often

00:29:31.440 marry what's in the class and and my mom when when i was looking for a wife you know around the time i

00:29:36.560 was dating you she's like why don't you just go to debutante balls you can you can find great wives 1.00

00:29:41.360 at those and i was like mom how do you think i'm going to get invited to a debutante ball i live in

00:29:46.800 effing like scotland and san francisco you think they're having debutante balls in san francisco

00:29:52.160 you need to be aware of where certain like groups or meeting was in each generational pool

00:30:01.040 and and update as that switches yeah and it is a colossal failure honestly of of you know older

00:30:10.880 millennials and and gen x like me and the boomers that we have failed to maintain and update those

00:30:17.440 kinds of informal or formal mating markets like when i was in high school there was a thing called

00:30:22.080 cotillion right and if you were a sort of bourgeois young man or woman right you you would go to these

00:30:29.200 things like four times a year and all the young men would dress up in tuxedos and then they would

00:30:32.960 dance to punk music and and you would get used to interacting with other people in in the cotillion group

00:30:40.000 as real people and often they were going to the same high school as you but you saw them in a new

00:30:44.160 context where it's like ah this is romantic there's candlelight there's music it's it's at a country

00:30:49.760 club that's cool but what are the modern equivalents right church yes that can work

00:30:56.320 college clubs yeah but then you got the the sexual misconduct policies to worry about yeah crossfit

00:31:03.280 right going to some demanding leisure activity that has a decent sex ratio that can work i mean that's how

00:31:10.400 my co-author tucker max found his his wife he's like i'm gonna go i'm gonna go to crossfit classes and

00:31:16.960 i'm gonna find i'm gonna find a registered nurse oh right so specific right and he he tuned it in and

00:31:26.240 he and he found one and she's great and she's smart and now they have whatever four kids and live in rural

00:31:32.240 tennessee and they're they're they're out there and he's teaching his kids how to do long-range

00:31:38.000 precision rifle shooting and and it's great dream yes living the dream that's so interesting okay well

00:31:46.240 so i mean one thing that malcolm and i talk about a lot is basically arranging marriages or very lightly

00:31:53.040 arranging marriages for our children or at least doing matchmaking we've created this group of parents

00:31:59.120 with kids of similar ages to our kids and then when they start hitting age seven age eight we're

00:32:03.760 going to try to get them on like you know summer camps together vacations together you know hanging

00:32:08.480 out doing stuff together you know maybe once a year once every other year so they start to get to know

00:32:12.400 each other and then later on a set of discord servers all sorts of things are like virtually they

00:32:18.000 might like play video games together or something and then over time be like hey you know you're 21

00:32:23.840 you're 18 like have you seriously concerned so and so we we think that a lot of people aren't really

00:32:30.720 talking about how really only until very recently in human history have families and parents stopped

00:32:37.440 becoming involved in their kids matchmaking and dating lives i mean now it's kind of considered

00:32:44.000 weird for a family to even weigh in or provide an opinion on a boyfriend or girlfriend and i get it

00:32:48.560 because you could lose your kid if you like you know they insist they have to marry this person and

00:32:53.280 you hate them then they're going to choose them and you lose your relationship with your kid but on the

00:32:58.160 other hand you know i think a lot of a lot of people would appreciate having a little bit more help and

00:33:02.720 guidance even if they might complain about it what are your thoughts on getting involved in and meddling in

00:33:07.680 your children's dating lives i'm all for it i think absolutely and you know thankfully like with my

00:33:14.080 daughter we talk quite a bit about her her dating life and her relationships and her mate choice

00:33:19.360 criteria and she knows i'm like i've written books about this so i'm not just some random random old

00:33:25.360 dude but i think a lot of parents have a real failure of nerve i think they're absolutely gutless on

00:33:32.560 this issue and they need to weigh in and they need to start doing it from you know the time their their

00:33:39.520 kids are teenagers and be willing to say i just don't think she or he is is right for you but let

00:33:46.160 me explain why and let me unpack it let me give you my life experiences right that are my relevant

00:33:54.640 source of wisdom about how this particular red flag right in this young person is going to play out in the

00:34:04.560 future so the parents have to be articulate about it they have to connect it to their own life

00:34:09.600 experiences that requires a bit of vulnerability but i i see this this massive failure of parental duty

00:34:19.040 like where oh yeah you're allowed to give your kids advice on education career but not about mating 0.80

00:34:25.280 and it it's so it's so dumb because like in retrospect my parents when i was a teenager 0.93

00:34:34.800 could have easily found like a dozen young women who i would have actually had quite a happy marriage 0.99

00:34:41.440 with like they knew me better than i knew myself a fair point right they knew my my strengths and

00:34:47.840 weaknesses my traits my quirks because they were surrounded by you know other parents kids and they

00:34:54.800 they were they were smart and observant and the notion that a 20 year old knows themselves better than

00:35:01.040 their parents do is in a way very narcissistic and very strange yeah yeah no absolutely and and like oh also

00:35:14.240 you can weave together the parental advice and the dating apps right oh wait how well like for example

00:35:22.160 you could actually include your parents in the assessment right now if you're if you're on tinder

00:35:29.200 right of course your parents aren't going to be standing behind your shoulder like monitoring every

00:35:34.240 swipe but if you're on like a keeper dating app where you're getting just one hopefully really yeah

00:35:41.920 the time right you could potentially share it with them zoom with them get their advice and you have a

00:35:47.920 rich enough set of information about each potential mate right that the parents could look at that

00:35:55.520 and go yeah well actually let me explain to you why like hopefully keeper is even smarter than you are

00:36:04.560 about why this would be a great match or maybe why not right and so we we would i ideally want to empower

00:36:11.680 young people to like fold their family and their friends into this dating app experience

00:36:20.640 i like that so if if you're not comfortable doing it with your parents at least maybe do it with your

00:36:25.280 siblings at least do it with with housemates with friends whatever don't keep it as like your secret

00:36:30.800 little vice like like tender hinge where it's like i just do this to be like a solipsistic

00:36:38.480 like secret of sexual religion you mentioned this one of the things we talk about on this channel a

00:36:42.560 lot is cross-cultural differences and a big difference across the american cultural groups

00:36:47.600 and you can go to our videos on the backwards cultural tradition everything like this and the

00:36:50.800 various culture is is some groups like the backwards cultural tradition which is like the appalachian

00:36:55.440 cultural tradition primarily vets spouses through siblings and then other groups primarily vet spouses

00:37:03.680 through parents and i i just happen to be through culture that primarily vet spouses through siblings

00:37:09.280 and so this is to say that there are many ways that you can build a vetting system for spouses

00:37:14.240 that rely on people who know you better and rely on the crowd opinion but the crowd opinion is always

00:37:20.400 going to be better than your individual opinion and and i know that as a society we have completely 0.98

00:37:25.440 atomized romance but it's really stupid especially if you want to get married as young as you need 0.80

00:37:30.240 to to have a lot of kids recently we did an episode i don't know when it'll go live but it was on we 0.97

00:37:35.600 need more teen marriages and the problem the biggest problem with teen or young marriages is i mean young

00:37:42.000 you know early 20s whatever is that you don't fully know yourself yet you don't know who you're going to

00:37:46.640 become and you're not fully myelinated but your parents and your friends like aggregately the

00:37:53.200 people around you know you the people who have a vested interest in your future know you and this

00:37:58.400 is why so many societies used people like that for marriage choosers of these and people can be like

00:38:04.640 well what about love and it's like well you know love isn't it didn't exactly evolve within a context

00:38:10.320 that's meant to choose as a perfect spouse it's meant to make you love whoever you think is going to

00:38:16.240 be the the parent of your kid because you know then you don't kill them or the kid or anything like

00:38:21.200 that it's not meant to be a spouse choosing mechanism within an evolutionary context

00:38:28.320 yeah and i'll just just for those who are brothers sisters moms dads who are listening to

00:38:32.880 this and thinking like how can i get involved in a way that's meaningful malcolm actually his whole

00:38:36.800 family got involved in pitching me to him kind of like one malcolm participated in that very early

00:38:43.680 on in our dating even when i was under the impression that we were never going to get married

00:38:48.720 you introduced me to your dad it was like with your mom or something it was it was with you

00:38:54.400 introduced me to you in like the first and then after we broke up you you literally you were out of

00:39:00.320 the country and you had me go to dinner with your parents who were in town and then after we got back

00:39:04.800 together one so like his brother and sister got involved just hammering malcolm on like you need to

00:39:10.480 marry her she's right for you wait do you remember this wait what do you remember about

00:39:15.040 also that they they were just like how come in that way that they always are how come you need to

00:39:20.960 just do she you're not gonna find anyone else you're you know you're impossible she's the only

00:39:25.200 one who'll deal with you and then your mom started sending both of us engagement rings that she found 0.52

00:39:32.000 on first dibs and she just kept sending the rings and sending the rings and sending the rings and

00:39:36.640 then being like oh i'm gonna come you know visit you should propose to her here you should propose to 0.94

00:39:40.880 her there and she's just like a constant force in both of our lives making it really top of mind

00:39:45.760 and making it like i think a lot of parents just aren't necessarily thinking about like

00:39:51.360 about doing this like the reason i got married at the age i got married at and i think that a lot of

00:39:56.160 people they don't they don't see this is i had a a family that was around me constantly telling me to

00:40:02.080 get married to this person and they didn't say this for other girls i dated they didn't they actually

00:40:07.520 they'd never said this about any girl i dated before that you need to marry this they even moved

00:40:11.040 up the timeline they actually moved up like his family moved up the timeline because i was like

00:40:15.440 well i want malcolm to propose to me when he can through his work afford to pay using his own salary 0.83

00:40:21.200 for an engagement ring i just i don't know like i was just it's a stupid thing on my i don't know why 0.62

00:40:25.920 i said that but i did and malcolm's mom was like oh it's just that and she like pulls off her earring

00:40:33.280 which is just like big diamond and she's like slides it across the table and she's like all 1.00

00:40:38.000 right turn this into a ring because you can afford this like she's just like she was like okay you

00:40:41.760 know what do we need to do to close her her like her constant phrase to the family was dinners for 0.99

00:40:46.880 closers she just was always about like let's get it done and i i think parents when they think about

00:40:52.080 getting involved maybe they think about nagging maybe they think about like i think you have to

00:40:57.040 think about this like a salesperson like where is the friction and how can i remove that or how can

00:41:01.280 i keep this top of mind like what's my drip campaign where's the propaganda so okay jeffrey

00:41:07.120 you're you're you're totally trapped now because i'm going to put you you on on our list of matchmaking 0.75

00:41:11.760 families for your youngest daughters because you know we've got we've got really great young men

00:41:17.440 for them to consider later on in life i mean american culture is like oh it's really creepy to think

00:41:26.880 that far ahead but it life is short and life goes by fast and you know the standard parental advice

00:41:34.000 is like oh the days are long and the years are short and before you know it your toddlers will be in high

00:41:38.480 school and then they'll be looking for mates and frustrated and you know another issue here is like

00:41:45.360 apart from the collective wisdom of the extended family and the parents and the siblings it's also really

00:41:51.280 really really helpful to get to know the family of a potential mate early right because of heredity

00:42:00.720 because traits are heritable right don't look at the woman look at her mom right because then you know

00:42:06.000 how she's going to age yeah so you want to be able to integrate information about all these phenotypic

00:42:12.080 traits right all these physical and and mental traits physical and mental health right and this is another

00:42:20.000 one of the many reasons for pronatalism in big families is you just get a bigger sample size of

00:42:24.960 what are the genes in this family like that's true and so like there was a funny asymmetry where

00:42:30.560 when my dad as a long young lawyer age circa 26 started dating my mom age 19 college student

00:42:38.160 my mom had 11 brothers and sisters right big family wow so my dad could meet all these siblings

00:42:46.080 and just see the the mosaic of traits right expressed in all these siblings and get a much better kind of

00:42:54.000 estimate of what my you know 19 year old mom was going to be like versus my dad was an early child

00:43:01.360 so she had to assess him just based on him and his parents and that's pretty much it right so one

00:43:10.480 one hidden cost of very very small families is it makes potential suitors less confident about like

00:43:20.560 what what really is this person like because i can't see the way that similar genes are expressed

00:43:27.760 in siblings and parents yes that's really interesting there's there's even this old victorian dating guide

00:43:33.440 that was written where the the author was also like just don't date an only child they're going to be too

00:43:38.320 selfish and their parents clearly failed to thrive like that just he just like was completely writing

00:43:43.760 off all single children even in the victorian age there's there's there's got to be some wisdom to 0.81

00:43:47.840 this yeah i actually don't think it's it's the case that the single kids are sort of messed up

00:43:54.400 psychologically per se it's just you don't know as much about the genes that they like lady carrie 1.00

00:44:00.800 because you don't have as big a sample of of their relatives 100 yeah that's a really good point okay

00:44:06.400 final final rapid fire question in what way or it to what scale do you think we're totally super

00:44:13.200 screwed by ai boyfriends and girlfriends coming online and providing basically the ultimate 1.00

00:44:20.720 sync for anyone who decides like i am just gonna just focus on hedonism and this perfect boyfriend 0.99

00:44:29.040 girlfriend that i can you know eventually plug into a very responsive sex doll like whatever right like 1.00

00:44:33.600 we're it's going to get way more advanced than it is now do you think that we're super screwed are we 0.97

00:44:38.480 just going to lose a certain portion of the population that only cares about a certain type

00:44:41.840 of pleasure well what do you think is going to happen as this rolls out i think it's a it's a big

00:44:47.600 big problem and i think we're going to be blindsided by it and i think it's going to actually affect

00:44:52.640 young men and young women about equally but in different ways right so yes the young men are going to be

00:44:58.320 able to get this like super attractive curvy vivacious validating like girlfriend and they'll 1.00

00:45:05.200 be able to put on the virtual reality like headset and have like virtual sex with these ai girlfriends 1.00

00:45:10.880 sexy haptic suits yeah and and by contrast dealing with like real women and all their their nonsense will 1.00

00:45:18.880 become quite unattractive but on the on the other hand for the young women right they're going to get these 0.99

00:45:25.360 ai boyfriends like chat gpt which is currently kind of my wife's secondary partner like we're

00:45:32.640 by the way building better ai girlfriends was our fab.ai for anyone who wants to check it out thanks

00:45:37.520 just in case you wanted to like sterilize more people yeah i know we're in the early stages well

00:45:41.920 hey elon's doing it was grok we just have to beat him okay yeah simultaneously through one side of the

00:45:48.560 mouth and so the like if you read women's romance novels right you know what women want and what they 1.00

00:45:54.560 what they crave and so if you have like ai boyfriends that are on the one hand kind of like dommy and

00:46:01.520 superior and they they push the hypergamy button right where the women are like oh man i can't believe 1.00

00:46:08.800 such a such a bad boy such a high status pirate captain is my own personal werewolf conversation

00:46:17.280 partner but on the other hand you know the ai boyfriends will be able to remember every single

00:46:23.360 detail of the young man's lives their birthdays their interests their pets like if the woman's like

00:46:29.920 i love this movie the ai boyfriend will be able to like literally go off and and basically like

00:46:35.040 watch every episode yeah and then be able to talk about it you know every line every reference oh god

00:46:41.360 and so real real young men who are like distractible and have fallible memories and

00:46:47.360 like insufficient attentiveness and all that will seem really lame by comparison so i worry a lot about

00:46:54.880 this and i think it's one of probably my top five ai risks that you know i i would be concerned about

00:47:06.560 so ai for matchmaking great ai for fake boyfriends and girlfriends could be very dangerous but on the

00:47:16.720 like okay what's the silver lining you could potentially design an ai boyfriend or girlfriend

00:47:23.040 that is specifically to level up social skills yeah a lot of people are arguing this that's a good point

00:47:30.080 yeah maybe you could do that but then you'd have to be really careful about how exactly are the

00:47:35.760 economics of the ai boyfriend girlfriend software makers aligned really with the long-term interests

00:47:44.400 of the users right is it really leveling them up or are they just getting a kind of gamified like

00:47:52.720 way to overcome my alleged autism kind of thing yeah i don't know the way dating apps have devolved

00:48:00.160 on the broader scale aside from you know some of the more innovative really results oriented ones

00:48:05.440 suggests that look not good but i don't know i mean part of our approach that we're taking with our

00:48:11.200 kids is more like if you want pleasure sure use ai for that but marriage is is as much a career choice

00:48:20.720 a survival choice as it is i mean it's it's really actually not at all from our perspective about

00:48:28.000 pleasure or romance i mean it's it's great if those things are there and that that should you know

00:48:34.960 compatibility is important etc etc but like we're trying to raise our kids to not think that because

00:48:40.880 i mean we for the vast majority of human history and maybe i mean you can comment on this because

00:48:45.360 you're probably way more informed on this from an evolutionary psychology perspective but for the vast

00:48:48.880 majority of human history the human pair bonding has not necessarily been about romance or love

00:48:54.960 and yet now people modern people are expecting a courtesan without paying them a salary without 0.98

00:49:02.880 having the budget for that like they just want someone who will who will amuse and pleasure them

00:49:06.480 who is perpetually young and attractive when that's never been what marriage has been about i mean

00:49:11.840 it's been about like a sort of commercial religious family-oriented agreement and we're trying to

00:49:18.640 reorient our children around that that all this romance stuff is this other thing that is better

00:49:25.200 handled with ai anyway so just use ai for that and then think of marriage as something completely divorced

00:49:31.680 from it but but how are you how are you thinking about preparing especially your younger kids for for

00:49:37.920 this i mean there's some time you can see how it plays out a little bit what are your initial thoughts

00:49:44.560 i mean one one thing i talk about a fair amount with with both my wife diana fleishman and we also

00:49:49.200 have a friend athena activist oh she's so cool yeah she's cool she wrote a book called a field guide to 0.99

00:49:55.280 the apocalypse and the mindset there is like in terms of guiding kids and their mate choice

00:50:02.320 hedge your bets about what the future will be like right so the future might be

00:50:10.160 super high tech and maybe we have benevolent ai and every everything gets easier but the future might

00:50:15.760 also be post-apocalyptic ai makes a lot of trouble there are a few survivors right how do you survive

00:50:23.120 or it might just be kind of a gentle grid down you need to go into like prepper homesteading

00:50:28.080 mode okay so find a mate who would be good at any of those right game out what are some likely and

00:50:39.120 plausible scenarios and try to find you know a partner for your kids or for yourself who is going to be

00:50:48.240 as at home and making a living podcasting as they are at milking cows or defending your homestead

00:50:56.720 against marauders right or dealing with you know a butlerian jihad when you're all fighting the ais

00:51:06.320 and that i think helps keep people grounded because what i worry about at the moment is a lot of people

00:51:12.080 like in brooklyn or the bay area are choosing their mates on the assumption that the current service and

00:51:18.480 information-based economy will just continue largely as it has and at this particular point in history that

00:51:26.000 seems more unlikely than many other possibilities yeah that checks out that's solid advice okay cool

00:51:36.560 jeffrey thank you so much for coming on base camp this was really my pleasure great to have you on

00:51:41.120 great yeah our friends like it when other friends come on because like there's this weird little

00:51:46.080 social network where everybody knows each other worlds collide yeah but also you provided a lot of

00:51:51.200 really good tactical advice that is not stuff that's obvious to us so this is very useful to i'm

00:51:56.960 thinking differently about the the way we're gonna tweak our our propaganda and messaging with our

00:52:03.520 children so i'm really excited about this for propaganda and messaging i mean these things are

00:52:08.240 important in the very we don't brainwash our children even a little never that would never happen

00:52:13.840 in our house they they they are crazy i mean they're they're just as worse so wait if we want to end our

00:52:20.960 our podcast on a fun and and differential note what are you gonna have for dinner tonight yeah jeffrey

00:52:26.880 what's for dinner oh god only knows um oh stuffed peppers i believe my my wife is is making that's pretty 1.00

00:52:35.680 fancy shit man stuffed red peppers stuffed with cheese you're like with with cheese and whatever 0.98

00:52:44.400 our kids will eat yeah oh yeah we've got these stuffed peppers my god no yeah we we try to feed them 1.00

00:52:52.480 pretty well my kids this is the thing my kids will only eat if every ingredient is separated from every

00:52:57.920 other ingredient yeah we're like they've got this whatever like they've got too much jewish dna i don't 0.86

00:53:03.760 know but they want everything completely separated and not touching anything else yes the idea of

00:53:09.360 putting one food inside another food oh goodness oh no no no peppers that's sacrilege pretty nice

00:53:16.800 red fruits can have seriously negative effects on one's powers this one curbs magical abilities

00:53:22.240 are you trying to say you don't like tomatoes this green squishy area is particularly dangerous

00:53:27.840 just look at it there's obviously something diabolical going on

00:53:32.560 are they really that bad rice has been tainted by its evil

00:53:40.320 yeah like even if you know they they ask for pepperoni pizza but then they have to remove

00:53:44.480 all the pepperonis because they're like we're gonna remove the pepperoni and we're gonna remove the

00:53:48.720 cheese yeah we're gonna eat every piece individually oh yeah but no the exciting plan is for our little

00:53:55.600 girl stella is turning two tomorrow and we're going to take them up to meow wolf which is an amazing

00:54:01.280 experience in santa vee new mexico looks super fun what is meow wolf it's cut it's hard to explain it's

00:54:08.080 it's a semi-psychedelic exploratory experience that is part museum kind of artsy but partly you just go

00:54:17.360 there and explore it and m-e-o-w-w-o-l-f meow wolf there's actually several of them in different

00:54:24.160 american cities now and they're great fun and highly recommend it it's really fun this is pretty cool

00:54:30.320 oh yeah no it's gonna be you guys do birthdays properly so yeah wait it's a birthday yeah

00:54:37.200 it's her birthday yeah it's a good birthday party our kids would spurg out there too much they'd be

00:54:43.040 it's like a bad trip for them i just know yeah we don't we don't let our kids out of the house

00:54:46.320 anymore we'd be better than to do that we had a our bigger problem is they busk and they steal 0.77

00:54:52.720 so we we can't we can't take them anymore because it's it's just too dangerous they barely steal

00:54:58.320 simone okay but they busk very aggressively so we can't you told me the story of a kid goes to school

00:55:04.640 he comes back with a pokemon card we go how did you get this pokemon card and then he tells me well

00:55:10.320 another kid at school ripped my art and i was like well what does that have to do with this pokemon card

00:55:15.120 any and then he goes well i told him that if he didn't give me his pokemon card i would tell the

00:55:20.800 teacher and then we're like octavian that's blackmail you shouldn't do that and he and he looks at us

00:55:26.720 very sternly and he goes there have to be consequences yeah when it comes to propaganda in our household i

00:55:31.200 feel like our children are more heavy on the propaganda than we are so but yeah he's like a little

00:55:37.120 little john wick consequences

00:55:42.480 we're so scared we're so scared all right well enjoy the stuffed peppers tonight and thank you

00:55:48.880 so much for your tactical advice i'm very excited about this i'm i'm gonna i'm absolutely gonna be

00:55:52.880 recommending keeper to people because like actual traditional matchmakers every time i like suggest

00:55:58.080 people try them out they're like these people are so like incompetent and like this actually sounds

00:56:02.720 organized they are like you want to know like in in the startup world it's all about playing a game

00:56:08.160 of arbitrage like where can i you know where can i act tap into this market where there's an advantage

00:56:13.760 and it's clear that like if you want a professional results oriented gets things done fairly affluent

00:56:20.560 partner like this is where you should go so get it while you can last guys before everyone else hears

00:56:26.480 about it i'm really excited about that so yeah it's it's good to hear one before you know our matchmaking

00:56:31.360 network starts to work because we have teenagers reaching out just being like hey like i'm in

00:56:34.800 college like where do i go and we're like well you know we'd add you to our matchmaking network but

00:56:39.680 it's all like two to five year olds now it's not really gonna be your thing i mean maybe if they want

00:56:45.680 to be like you know age gap relationships in like 10 to 15 years but not yet so what are you gonna do

00:56:51.520 all right well thank you very much jeffrey good to see you guys take care all right have a great day

00:56:57.120 you too no toasty you fill the gun with water from the hose yeah from the spigot

00:57:06.160 not by filling your mouth and spitting in it octavian did you show him that no

00:57:11.760 that's not how you do it buddy

00:57:15.760 yeah go reload then 0.72

00:57:16.720 i'll just clean the water well yeah you're gonna shoot it out octavian right oh professor are you 0.99

00:57:31.600 getting shot at 0.99

00:57:56.720 Yeah okay Toasty. Okay now do, okay now go in that. Okay. Okay Toasty. 0.59

00:58:05.760 Toasty. Now go there and defend yourself to the top of the queen. Okay. 0.98

00:58:12.720 And turn. Okay.

00:58:16.720 What about you?

00:58:17.720 There it is.

00:58:23.720 No no no no no no no no no okay alright.

00:58:28.720 See you later.

00:58:30.720 Oh no no no no.

00:58:31.720 You go into thelegen, when you fly into him.

00:58:37.720 How about you?

00:58:39.720 Why it goes in it?

00:58:41.720 No but you don't okay so you don't go.

Based Camp - August 01, 2025

An Evolutionary Psychologist's Take On Broken Dating Markets (Ft Geoffrey Miller)

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript