Do Women Have a Preference for Domestic Labor？
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Summary
In this episode, we discuss why women should be in the kitchen, and why they enjoy it. We also talk about why women are more likely to enjoy child-care duties than men, and the research that backs this up.
Transcript
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Speaking of child care duties, I have a big duty in this bear's outfit.
00:00:04.500
Okay, I'll let you do the things that you enjoy doing.
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Have a good time with your little recreational task there, and I will see you shortly.
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I'm so excited to be speaking with you today, though very conflicted, because as a San Francisco
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Bay Area raised woman, I was raised in blank slate-ism, and women can do everything, and
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my life should be about having a career and never getting married and never having kids,
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and yet today I am going to argue to you that women have no place to complain that they share
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an undue burden in household tasks, because one, they choose to do more household tasks
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And this is backed up by both science and humor, both of which I think are very legitimate.
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This episode is going to focus on that women should be in the kitchen.
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Even if they have a job, they should also be in the kitchen.
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What's worse, though, is that they want to be in the kitchen.
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Well, so actually, Shoe on Head had a thing about this recently, where she was like doing
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an episode, and she let slip, she goes, you know, all women, and of course, she didn't
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mean all, she meant most women, when somebody says this, but she was definitely speaking
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They go, they want a man to take care of them and support their babies, and I was like-
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Like, honestly, that's, I mean, it takes balls to come out and say that, is anyone.
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I mean, this episode is definitely going to be one where the, you know, like, Monday,
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Friday type people, the people who love to criticize conservatives for saying what is
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reasonable and statistics-based, because they're like, no, but we should all live in a fantasy
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And again, to clarify what she's saying here is women shouldn't feel forced into these
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However, creating societal expectations around women not taking these positions, which we
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have done as a society right now, where it is, as a woman, you feel bad if you are doing
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You are being a trad wife, and many women are like, I would never, it's a white, white
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nationalist to be a trad wife, right, to cook meals and do the dishes and dress well.
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And, you know, so they are going to feel bad and feel this cognitive dissonance.
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Yeah, but then the problem is that the converse of this, let's say that a woman, like, politically
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is like, okay, well, we have to split everything 50-50 just to make things right and proper.
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As they should be, they'll be less happy, because they'd rather do a lot of these things
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But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but you'll also see going into what some of these household
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labor tasks are that, like, most women would be like, oh, but, oh, well, I want to, I want
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Like, you know, home aesthetics, decorating for Christmas.
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Women are like, oh, I mean, oh, you know, like, they'll be like, oh, it's such a struggle.
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You know, I'm going to decorate for Valentine's Day, but like, and shopping.
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So big hat tip to Diana Fleischman for cluing us into this.
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The research that we're looking at this for the research portion of this episode is a
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paper called Gendered Perspectives on Sharing the Load, Men's and Women's Attitude Toward Family
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One, they just sort of note the general research that broadly acknowledges this to be a truth
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universal, that there's this, like, sort of mismatch between labor and desires.
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They cite, for example, Miller 2020, in that young people today are holding on to traditional
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views about who does what at home, and young people are no more likely than older couples
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So both young and old people are still kind of attracted to these traditional roles, which
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They also cite Steve Stewart Williams, who's really, I think, active on Twitter and really
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interesting, that selection has equipped human females with not only the physiological
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apparatus for maternal care, boobs and vaginas, I guess, but also the psychological drives that
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So women also kind of have evolved the tendency to want to take these tasks on.
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And let's be clear about what is meant here, because this is clearly seen across studies
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that women perform, and feminists will laud, oh, women perform better at emotional tasks,
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Yeah, but once it has to do with, like, home labor, they're like, oh no.
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But they also, they cite Wood and Eagly in 2002 research, they point out this isn't just
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Females engage in more child care than males do in every human culture for which they're
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So this isn't like a United States thing, it's not a trad European thing, it's not a Chinese
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thing or a Mongolian thing or a Nigerian thing.
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It also, they cited from Brennan some 2020 research, so fairly recent national data indicated
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that women are more likely, 44% more likely than men at 25% to say that given the freedom
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to do either, they would prefer to stay at home to take care of the house and family rather
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So there's also this greater interest among women.
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So this is sort of the premise into which the researchers were coming into this.
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They're like, the actions have stated that women are gravitating toward the home and
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What they wanted to explore was, well, okay, so women spend more time on household labor
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Because normally people are like, oh, it's culture, it's obligation.
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It's because they have tits and the kids need to breath feed.
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Well, what they did was survey 323 emerging adults.
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So like young adults and 113 middle-aged adults at probably being about one, how much they
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like or dislike 58 different household tasks and 40 child care tasks to how they prefer
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Like, would you rather have your husband do this or your wife do this?
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And three, how their ideal prioritization of work and family will play out.
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And basically they found across both younger adults and middle-aged adults that men more
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than women liked tasks involving outdoor labor and home fixes and maintenance.
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And two, there was not a single child care task that men liked more than women did.
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They'll say that women, they may have liked these tasks more than men, but they must have
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Well, the problem, like I said earlier, like there are a bunch of these tasks in here and
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we'll look at some of the tables where I'm like, I don't even think of these things as
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labor, like scheduling, shopping, emotional support.
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Women complain about emotional support being labor all the time, Simone, but let's get into
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I'll go into the, that's something, yo, they're always like when they're talking about like
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a husband paying a housewife and they're trying to break out everything.
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They're always like being a psychologist or, you know, it's like, well, you're not being
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What we can look at here is figure one from the research, which I sent you via WhatsApp
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of how emerging and middle-aged adults felt about various tasks.
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So you're going to see there's this, this spectrum of going to hate it versus going to
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Now there are some things that both men and women are not really into thing.
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Number one, being disciplining children, both men and women lean toward going to hate it,
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but actually men, which this actually surprised me.
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Men are going to hate discipline more than women.
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Middle-aged men actually are neutral, which is interesting.
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What, did they like grow balls when they grew older or something?
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No, I think it's this younger generation of men has been raised to be very afraid of
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Well, not just that, but the stigmatization of a man in any way touching a child in a way
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But engaging was, I mean, remember, I've had crowds freak out on me for just being
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But they are taught that because they are men, they are not allowed to engage with children
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And they face negative repercussions for it in society.
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And I think that that's what you're seeing in this chart right here.
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Seeing in the older crowd is that men historically did take on this role of disciplining children.
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And it's interesting here, if you looked at this historic men disciplining children, that
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was out of everything in the entire chart that if you're looking at like the average hate
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amount, because people are like, well, women don't like doing these things on average.
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And the only one where both men and women dislike doing it on average, men are the one
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It's scheduling and coordination, but where women...
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In here, I'm looking at the older age range, where women do take it on.
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There's one other area where, and this is only for middle-aged adults, men are more excited
00:10:00.260
That is to say, like, more men, slightly on average, reported they were going to love
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Here's my take on this, is when we're looking at emerging adults, they have younger children.
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And when we're looking at middle-aged adults, they're more likely to have kids who are
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And I kind of feel like men get more excited about providing emotional support and, like,
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The reason why men are slightly more excited, middle-aged men are slightly more excited about
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cognitive support than women in this study is because specifically they have older kids
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I really like interacting with older kids at a cognitive level, and I know from a lot
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Like, when a kid hits that, like, 10-year-old range, they become really...
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Before puberty hits, when they're still, like, really, really smart.
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So, scheduling and coordinating, shopping, like, this is, you know, it's such, like,
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women, I feel like most women would be, like, really pissed if they, like, if they were blocked
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They would act as though it was an act of, like, disempowerment.
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My God, if you managed our schedule, I don't know if we'd have a marriage, you know?
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Because I freak out when people do any of that.
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If you look at figure two, you'll see how the emerging and middle-aged participants of
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You can sort of see where women wanted men to do more stuff.
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The only time women want men to do a child care task more than themselves is with discipline
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We're looking now at figure two, which shows the share of work, essentially, that each person
00:12:12.860
Either, like, I always want myself to do this, or I always want my partner to do this.
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The only instance in which women, and in this case, it's only young women, would slightly
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prefer that their partner always do something, is discipline.
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This is the same cohort where, actually, the men...
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If you see younger and older, men are willing to take on the task of discipline.
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It's only in the task that nobody wants to do that men end up doing it.
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And in the tasks that most people want to do, it's just that women want to do them more.
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And men, for the rest of things, also, like, would prefer that their partner, slightly,
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Men would prefer that their partner do the scheduling and the shopping.
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This preference actually increases with age for men.
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And then the preference in the opposite direction, women being like, no, I really want to do the
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scheduling and shopping, also increases with gravity as age increases.
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With the rest of things, like nighttime care, emotional support, the preference for self
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But when it comes to scheduling and coordinating and shopping, it's very interesting to see
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that as people get older, they're more, like, set in their gender roles, which is super
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As a side note here, I really think all of this needs to be considered in the context of
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the famous paper, The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness, that looked at how as women
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received, quote unquote, more rights or as feminism, quote unquote, was winning more, females, when
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compared to men, became less satisfied with their lives.
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Specifically, if you go back to the 1970s, females were significantly more satisfied with
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their lives than men, and as time goes on, both male and female satisfaction begins to
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drop, but female satisfaction drops further to the point where in the 1990s, women were
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both on and net unhappy with their lives and dramatically less happy with their lives than
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While there are many explanations for this, the stance that we're talking about here could
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Specifically, women are forcing themselves to do things they don't like because it creates
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cognitive dissonance with the female ideal of what a woman should like to do or be.
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Now, this next one I find interesting, because it looks at how much they enjoy various tasks,
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and here we're seeing a number of tasks that men prefer to do.
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Now, we're switching from child care to household tasks, so we're looking at things like home
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fixes and maintenance, outdoor labor, finances, indoor cleaning, gardening, food prep, family
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And you see that men really prefer to do tasks, and do enjoy tasks, and women disenjoy these
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tasks, like home maintenance and fixing, outdoor labor, finances.
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Essentially, young women especially, are going to hate managing finances, and men kind of
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hate it, but probably then I guess would end up doing more of it.
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And then you get to middle age, and men actually don't seem to hate managing finances as much,
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I kind of feel like it's because they're further on in their career.
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Like, it's less about managing debt and more about managing wealth.
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I think it's because they are more old school, just because they're older and they grew up
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As we figured out, historically, women often manage the family's finances.
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Like, the one thing that I expected to be a woman's thing, for sure, was finances.
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And I also had thought of it as a traditional thing, just like you did.
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What's really interesting here is if you look at the things that women are doing versus
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things that men are doing, like the things that men are doing specifically, like home
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maintenance, outdoor labor, this is stereotypical male labor.
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Dividing a house in the way that is the default preference for both parties is, as the one reporter
00:16:23.620
who did the piece on us, like, oh my god, I can't believe she's so oppressed.
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And all of this hatred is just people, you know, as I said, I think it's against, quote
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I think in the looser sense, rather than the very strict, if you trad wife, then everything
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But the idea of a traditional gender structure in a household, which they'll call trad wives,
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And likely, I mean, if you look at this chart of preferences, if you're like, huh, why do
00:17:02.320
progressives have such higher rates of mental illness, and also experiment with ways of
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structuring their family that don't lean into the traditional gender roles?
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Yeah, like, they're actively choosing to not do stuff that they probably love doing, which
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Yeah, I think Winston Churchill had his whole gardening era, his gardening and painting era,
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And yeah, yeah, yeah, there's some things here where I'm like, I don't know, but like,
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I'm trying to think, like, to my traditional tropes on gardening, and it was traditionally
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All the, like, landscaping architects I can think of historically were male.
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And even in storybooks, like Peter Rabbit, it's Mr. McGregor's garden, all right?
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Mrs. McGregor may have cooked Peter Rabbit's father into a stew, but it was Mr. McGregor
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You know, and he was the one who killed Peter Rabbit's father.
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Here's what I wonder about this, because this actually is interesting to me, because gardening
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I would actually guess that these numbers are not wrong.
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If I'm thinking from an evolutionary perspective, women were much more likely to stay at home
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while men went out on big risk, big reward things, whether that was raiding other settlements
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You're talking about, like, the vast majority of human evolution, which is that women would
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I mean, John Adams was, like, never home for a huge portion of his career.
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However, within France, he was out in meetings.
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He was, like, forming America, and she was holding down the fort, you know, getting experimental
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smallpox vaccines and taking care of their land.
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I'm sure they had some staff, but, like, still, I don't know.
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But anyway, it's, yeah, there's some surprises here, but most of it makes sense.
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Food prep, to me, is kind of interesting, because when you look at the food industry, like,
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when it comes to high cuisine, most famous chefs and sous chefs and whatnot are, like,
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And I've always seen kitchens, from, like, a commercial standpoint, as being a highly
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When I think about cooking, I actually really, really think about men, but maybe that's only
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elite cooking, and then, like, basic cooking as a woman thing.
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And also, interestingly, my dad did all the shopping.
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I mean, like, of course, caveat, caveat, all of this is on average.
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But at the same time, Malcolm's point stands, which is that, like, a lot of people who politically
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avoid leaning into these things because they feel like ideologically it's wrong or that
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they're all societal fantasies and not actual inbuilt tendencies and preferences are going
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And it's maybe showing up in the mental health data that we're facing.
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So, when you, when you, so now we can look at finally figure four, which is sort of showing
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And it's very clear that women really prefer that men do the home maintenance and finance
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I mean, our reversal there is that I do all the finances and you do all the deciding,
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The one area where there's a really profound difference in age is that young or emerging
00:21:02.100
adults are, well, at least young men are far less likely to be like, I'm only going to have
00:21:11.980
I think men are getting more interested in home aesthetics, like in younger generations.
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And women have, both young and older women are more like already entrenched in their feeling
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I actually feel like the home aesthetics is about men conceding over time.
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Like, she's, she's got this Christmas thing and I'm not going to get in the way of it.
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It's like, there were these stereotypes of, what is it?
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The so-and-so's family Christmas, the van, whatever.
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Like, what's the, like with the guy getting electrocuted by Christmas lights and being obsessed
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Like, there is a common American trope of dad being obsessed with Christmas decorations.
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And that's where I'm getting a little confused by this.
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You see National Lampoon's family vacation, but they never, they never did.
00:22:11.340
Ah, so that falls under home maintenance and fixes.
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I mean, he clearly did it as like a home maintenance type of project, not as an indoor decoration type
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So I think that what you're seeing here is just the typical retreat of the male.
00:22:35.140
And I think that this, this, this study is good.
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And basically the finding that they had that is really important and a great contribution
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This isn't just the fact that like men are stronger.
00:22:46.680
So lifting trees outdoors is easier and women have breasts, so it's easier to stay at home
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It's, it's also that they kind of prefer these things.
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And I think that's a really helpful finding, but I think there are many more elements to
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this that have been missed and that you can find using a version of natural experiment
00:23:04.960
that I may overweigh in terms of my standard of evidence.
00:23:15.000
Just let me make my pitch to you, base campers out there listening somewhere.
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I think that if there is a joke online or a meme online, and it has a lot of likes or
00:23:25.800
a lot of views, that means that it indicates a level of truth that really resonates with
00:23:30.900
And it wouldn't get a lot of traction if it wasn't like true because Malcolm's theory,
00:23:35.260
which I think is very, very robust about humor is that we laugh at things because it's
00:23:39.260
kind of surprising or unexpected, but it totally makes sense.
00:23:42.500
So I think that there's a bunch of like sort of very common joke tropes that I keep seeing
00:23:49.240
on, I mean, I'm only looking at like YouTube shorts and Instagram reels, but they're also
00:23:54.680
on TikTok because they're originally from TikTok that I think are really indicative of additional
00:23:59.120
reasons why women disproportionately do childcare and household labor.
00:24:03.320
So I'm going to start off by sending you a clip from Micah and Sarah.
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We need to set unrealistic expectations of how we live!
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I want them questioning if the bin is even real!
00:24:33.640
Oh gosh, that is so you when we, not when we have guests over, when we have the cleaner
00:24:41.000
Like if we, we don't have a cleaner, but we have occasionally splurged on a cleaner like
00:24:47.260
And you will have a spasm about the house and not being clean enough.
00:24:51.260
No, I mean, also when we have guests, but like, yeah, no, I, this is, and here's, here's
00:24:56.160
the truth that I think this reveals because this so resonates and I mean, I'm not alone.
00:25:01.100
Like this has been liked by over 140,000 people.
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They're, this, this was not captured in the research.
00:25:14.920
Like they don't want, yeah, like I know this feeling of like, I don't want anyone to think
00:25:23.200
Like, and even when, when we have guests, I'm like, oh my God, like, I can't believe
00:25:27.640
But why can't you apply logic to that and be like, this is.
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And that's, that's one of those other things that I think is inbuilt.
00:25:37.420
She's saying is that women lack a capacity for rationality.
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They are panicky, irrational beings that should be in cages like little birds.
00:25:48.820
Or they'll, or their little hearts will beat till they die from, from.
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And so like, yes, I think, but I think this is a very important factor that is underrated
00:26:06.340
It also means that like kind of women have to, if you want, if you want to not feel the
00:26:11.120
pain, you're going to have to do some more work cleaning.
00:26:14.660
So, but, but this isn't just a loss of rationality.
00:26:17.740
And I'm going to give you two examples with this, which just kind of exemplify that both,
00:26:22.140
especially with childcare, but also with house, house care, women just don't want to deal
00:26:44.140
In fact, I might send, I might send you a clip of like that video I took of you just
00:26:48.040
after a couple of hours of you watching the kids and what the room looked like.
00:27:03.780
I, I think maybe the kids are alive and I'll clean up what you want me to.
00:27:08.000
But yeah, I mean, like, that's the thing is, is women don't want to deal with the fallout
00:27:12.180
and also men and women have like distinctly different parenting styles.
00:27:17.600
And I think sometimes women are just like, what the kids need now is not daddy parenting.
00:27:22.520
So I'm going to give you another clip that I think exemplifies that.
00:27:40.880
For people who are watching this on audio, the mom's like kneeling and like rubbing
00:27:44.880
the baby's head and whispering to it and the dad's twirling it around in the covers.
00:27:51.880
I do know that when I'm with the kids at night, they're always like 20 times more excited
00:28:05.860
And I can like, I can like literally feel the house shake as they, you know.
00:28:09.860
So I think that this is another factor as proven by views of humorous videos of why women
00:28:16.860
sometimes just choose to take on the burden, even when they don't want to.
00:28:20.860
They're like, I just, I don't want to deal with the fallout.
00:28:24.860
There is the fallout here where if you are saying to the man, well, then you should do
00:28:30.860
it in a way where the wife doesn't have to deal with the fallout.
00:28:32.860
The problem is, is the fallout that she is afraid of having to deal with is not an intrinsically
00:28:41.860
It is only negative from the perspective of a feminine preference.
00:28:53.860
It's just the mother, unless she's responsible for cleaning up.
00:29:01.860
Another exhibit, which is that men sometimes just literally have such low standards that
00:29:06.860
even if they tried to meet women's standards, like they would fail.
00:29:10.860
And I think this exemplifies your standards with cleanliness quite well.
00:29:14.860
So I'm just going to have you take a look at this YouTube short here.
00:29:17.860
This is how women can tell if their clothes are clean.
00:29:29.860
So this is a man like saying how men and women, just for if you're listening audio only,
00:29:35.860
He, he pulled, like it's clearly a man in his own environment because he's in this filthy
00:29:40.860
He pulls like a garment out of a drawer and like looks at, and he's like, it's clean.
00:29:43.860
And that's how like women judge that something's clean.
00:29:45.860
And then he picks like some kind of garment off the floor, snips it.
00:29:49.860
Then like some like kind of like dripping piece of mucus attaches to his face from the
00:30:02.860
If the clothes still smells good, then it's clean.
00:30:11.860
And the, the lifetime value of clothing, because clothing falls apart if you wash it too frequently.
00:30:20.860
If you buy, if you buy cheap clothing on Shein, which we don't do.
00:30:32.860
If you just wash something, whenever you feel like it, you might as well be lighting clothes
00:30:43.860
There, there used to be this kid in my, in my middle school class, really, really nice
00:30:51.860
Because he wasn't smelling the clothing as I pointed out.
00:31:03.860
And he took, he took showers like multiple times every day, but he wanted his, his nice
00:31:23.860
Smell tests only work when you're not smell blind, Malcolm.
00:31:30.860
The audience for the most part has been everything with me.
00:31:32.860
And I, of course I will say there are many exceptional male outliers on this.
00:31:41.860
Admittedly had severe OCD, but we're way cleaner than I was.
00:31:45.860
So, I mean, yes, there are absolutely men who are clean, but yeah, anyway, I will also
00:31:50.860
say though, and I think this is a really interesting example, like given these tropes
00:31:54.860
of men and given that some men are actually exceptionally clean or good at doing household
00:31:58.860
tasks and organizing that just like with sex, we talk about how, for example, there's
00:32:06.860
So if you're willing to be a dom as a male or female, you kind of have a huge advantage
00:32:12.860
What we're seeing is actually a similar thing here in some circumstances that actually being
00:32:18.860
a man who organizes and cleans up and like does.
00:32:25.860
You are now taking the jobs that females have a stated and shown preference for having.
00:32:31.860
So let me, let me at least submit to your consideration an Instagram account.
00:32:37.860
There is a reason that the metrosexual male did not last.
00:32:45.860
And I'm sending you like one example of like a typical clip he does.
00:32:52.860
The look on her face at the end is what my dreams are made of.
00:32:55.860
Recently my wife's been talking about how she wants to get into cooking more.
00:32:58.860
And I thought this was the perfect place to start.
00:33:00.860
And what, what makes a Mason Smith have a big audience?
00:33:05.860
Basically it's, you know how like there's been all these jokes that like women porn is
00:33:12.860
like men being like, I'm going to listen to you and nod and say, Oh, that sounds terrible
00:33:24.860
Cause I'll just listen patiently and say things like, how annoying.
00:33:32.860
And well, it's his loss for just $24.95 an hour.
00:33:43.860
We're like, I understand that this is women porn.
00:33:48.860
I understand that women watch this and think, Oh, this is so great to watch.
00:34:03.860
You are the guy watching the girl on the stripper pole and seeing all the other guys
00:34:09.860
like the girl on the stripper pole and being like, Whoa, she'd make a great wife.
00:34:12.860
And the guy next to him was like, no, she wouldn't.
00:34:15.860
She is literally the antithesis of what would make a good wife.
00:34:22.860
And you're saying he's like, he's a, he's a fantasy.
00:34:26.860
Like a fit male plus doing, doing a thing that women like anyway.
00:34:34.860
This, this, this, this actually does dovetail with my final argument, which is that women
00:34:39.860
I think there, there might be some kind of, and we talk about this again in the
00:34:43.860
pragmatist guide to sexuality is concept of super stimuli.
00:34:45.860
We're like, let's say that like a bird has evolved over time to sit on blue objects.
00:34:50.860
Cause it's eggs happen to be blue and it needs to evolutionarily like someone's nest.
00:34:57.860
But then if you give it like blue rocks that are more blue than its own eggs, it's going
00:35:03.860
And I kind of have this feeling that there are some forms of cleaning related social media
00:35:09.860
that, that indicate the presence of a, like a instinctual super stimuli.
00:35:24.860
No, no male is familiar with clean talk because women are programmed to clean the house.
00:35:30.860
I don't mean to be like, look at a woman could be like, this is a very offensive thing to
00:35:36.860
And I'd say, well, then give me the gender breakdown on who watches clean talk.
00:35:46.860
I've given you an example of what clean talk looks like.
00:35:49.860
It's, it's from a YouTube short, but I don't have TikTok.
00:35:51.860
So that's why it's, it is actually one of TikTok's largest and fastest growing communities.
00:35:56.860
It has the hashtag clean talk has amassed over 150 billion views, making it one of the
00:36:02.860
platforms most popular genres and adjacent hashtags, hashtags like hashtag cleaning have 63.2 billion
00:36:26.860
And so I mean, this also like this, this, this is very much like, to me, a sign of demonstrated
00:36:35.860
instinctual, like, like almost porn level reaction to a stimulus of like, Oh, clean.
00:36:48.860
That's, but the important thing is that porn is related to a deeply that instinctual urge.
00:36:57.860
And I, I'm arguing that here is proof that cleaning for women is also a deeply set instinct.
00:37:06.860
So I am doing you a favor when I allow you to, to, to burden me with not having to clean the house.
00:37:16.860
And you in your spare time, instead of learning something new about the world, instead of exploring reality or politics or what's happening in society.
00:37:26.860
Despite the fact that from my Raynaud's in the cold, my fingers are so swollen that I can barely strip a bed from sheath.
00:37:33.860
And you are, you are watching other women and men clean things recreationally.
00:38:00.860
I want to say huge things to Diana Fleischman for sending us this topic.
00:38:04.860
And also getting us in trouble with all of these, these, these, these, the fascist wokies.
00:38:09.860
She has a book coming out, how to train your boyfriend, which she is finishing in mere days, Diana, days.
00:38:17.860
And I'm sure as soon as she's been pushing her on this, she's going to finish it in mere days.
00:38:23.860
And you should, you know, look out for a pre-order and make a pre-order.
00:38:29.860
It's going to be a spicy and delicious book on how to manipulate men from a science-based perspective.
00:38:36.860
You know, none of this will, you know, like old housewife things.
00:38:39.860
Well, everyone knows you are the true master at male manipulation.
00:38:42.860
Everyone always asks, oh, who wears, in the, in the Dad Saves America show where both of us are talking, they go, who wears the pants in that relationship?
00:38:53.860
Like my autistic mind always goes immediately to like, well, what's the empirical truth?
00:39:00.860
You like to go commando in our house all the time, even when it's 50 degrees in the house.
00:39:05.860
I actually think I spend more hours per day on average wearing pants.
00:39:15.860
A prodigious amount, which, you know, I mean, you have a lot to show off.
00:39:19.860
I'm not going to, I'm not going to complain, but I literally wear pants for more hours of, of the year.
00:39:30.860
Even, even when I'm like forced to like go down and handle the kids or something, I throw on a bathroom.
00:39:50.860
And I appreciate that you studied and learned that I force nothing on you.
00:40:17.860
We need to move it to the other, other parts of the, the urban monoculture, other parts of the woke mob.
00:40:23.860
Got to take a flamethrower and just blow torch science.
00:40:30.860
Nothing is more white supremacists than science.
00:40:49.860
Showing that women and men prefer traditional gender roles.
00:40:58.860
I love it when people are like, well, the men and women are acculturated to this.
00:41:03.860
So my wife is so acculturated to liking cleaning that she just watches it for fun in her spare time.
00:41:09.860
But here's the thing is I grew up being a blank slateist and also living in a household that was not normative from this perspective.
00:41:16.860
Because my dad did the majority of the shopping, at least half of the cooking, and a lot of the indoor cleaning.
00:41:28.860
Like he was the one who was OCD about the way that the shirts had to be folded and all this.
00:41:32.860
So I, it's not like I even normalized to like some kind of cultural thing.
00:41:37.860
Like I, I would have normalized to expecting men to like do all these things.
00:41:42.860
So yeah, I, I, I just, I have to concede on average women just prefer this stuff.
00:41:48.860
And then I think humor demonstrates furthermore that women also have additional social sensitivities that make them more likely to have proclivities to clean and do childcare.
00:41:57.860
Plus they don't want to deal with the male fallout because men also just have lower standards.
00:42:01.860
And that's my thing is whenever we talk to the press about like male and female equality, is it like, actually most men are willing to step up to do these things.
00:42:10.860
They might not love it, but they're willing to step up.
00:42:14.860
And I think that's the bigger issue is, is the husbands are like, yeah, sure.
00:42:19.860
But then like women are like, you call this acceptable.
00:42:28.860
And like, either you get to have to like lower your standards for house care and childcare, or you've got to do it yourself.
00:42:38.860
And this is the, this is, this is the psychological trick.
00:42:43.860
I have different standards for childcare and home care than you have.
00:42:49.860
I care about things that you may not be paying attention to.
00:42:55.860
Like for example, washing clothing less so it stays good longer.
00:42:59.860
Varnishing the floor less so that you don't strip the top layer off.
00:43:08.860
Remember when Aladdin came to our house and he's like, the only reason why your children are not developmentally delayed is that your wife diligently wet mobs your floors.
00:43:20.860
You know that lead dust is better handled by Swiffering.
00:43:26.860
Power mopping is where the water goes on and it gets sucked back up.
00:43:29.860
If you're just taking like a cloth and swashing it around, that's no good.
00:43:32.860
But if you're doing what I'm doing, which is basically combining them up with a vacuum where the water goes down, gets brushed on the floor and they get sucked back up.
00:43:47.860
Ah, anyway, speaking of childcare duties, I have a big duty in this bear's outfit to go wipe off and then we're going to do another episode.
00:43:57.860
I'll let you do the things that you enjoy doing.
00:43:59.860
Have a good time with your little recreational task there and I will see you shortly.
00:44:18.860
And before I forget, guys, Marge is right around the corner.
00:44:30.860
So if you're keen to join us, hang out with some really cool pro natalists of all stripes and base camp listeners, please go to the NatalCon website and enter the code Collins for 10% off your registration.
00:44:46.860
It's going to be two days of nonstop packed fun.
00:44:51.860
Also, if you have a kid who is four years old or younger, who is born through IVF and you want to help to contribute to science and the advancement of polygenic risk selection, please email us and we will connect you to a very interesting IRB study in which we too are participating as parents.
00:45:07.860
Oh, also, something I'm looking to hiring for the game dev team is if you are interested in AI art around AI related video games, even if you are not a traditional artist, if you're familiar with like Laura's or many of the different systems for creating AI art, we are going to be including a lot of it in the game and need people to generate good concept art at scale.
00:45:30.860
And so if you're interested in that, do reach out.
00:45:37.860
But still, we're not getting paid for any of this.
00:45:41.860
Did the future police give you the coolest things?
00:45:54.860
Remember your promise to the future police is to be nice to each other.